Roderick on the Line

Ep. 91: "Roller Derby Boyfriend"


00:00:00   hello hi John [TS]

00:00:07   hi Marilyn that's gone [TS]

00:00:11   m2m things are going good i'm i'm i'm [TS]

00:00:19   sitting here dressed in my my Hawkeye [TS]

00:00:23   Pierce outfit which is to say a a wet [TS]

00:00:28   kimono baseball hat from merrill field [TS]

00:00:32   airport [TS]

00:00:34   hmm some sleep but ugh slippers how you [TS]

00:00:38   recently bathed [TS]

00:00:39   yeah just got a little bathroom i got [TS]

00:00:42   about the specifically to do this [TS]

00:00:44   broadcast I kind of the things that you [TS]

00:00:45   give up for this challenge I know you [TS]

00:00:47   want the time to find some kind of [TS]

00:00:49   thirsty or apparel no no I'm fine I'm [TS]

00:00:51   just you know I'm I'm off-gassing a [TS]

00:00:53   little bit and just just getting in the [TS]

00:00:56   zone [TS]

00:00:56   oh it's it like silky my skin your [TS]

00:01:04   kimono [TS]

00:01:05   oh no it's a you know it's a cotton [TS]

00:01:08   kimono up you know just various shades [TS]

00:01:11   of blue flowers large blue flowers I i'm [TS]

00:01:15   not i'm not i really here's what i want [TS]

00:01:19   i want to live in a world where I [TS]

00:01:21   dressing kimonos but i do not live in [TS]

00:01:25   that world it's another world I want to [TS]

00:01:27   live in that I don't live in what you [TS]

00:01:29   mean like where people wouldn't look ask [TS]

00:01:30   ask if you go to the bank to cash check [TS]

00:01:33   and you're wearing a white kimono [TS]

00:01:33   nobody's gonna say anything [TS]

00:01:35   well you know I wouldn't wear wet kimono [TS]

00:01:36   to the bank not at first but like a big [TS]

00:01:39   like a big kimono and some like wooden [TS]

00:01:42   sandals and just sort of you know but [TS]

00:01:47   not i wouldn't we have a topknot or [TS]

00:01:49   anything i've been wearing a baseball [TS]

00:01:50   hat like a normal guy but just like in a [TS]

00:01:53   in a serious warrior kimono but what you [TS]

00:01:57   know people with people would give me [TS]

00:01:59   the hairy eyeball on I get that enough [TS]

00:02:02   and now is that your typical bounced on [TS]

00:02:07   me day i'm interested in robes [TS]

00:02:09   yeah he told me to yeah because I don't [TS]

00:02:11   know I feel I feel kind of guilty when [TS]

00:02:13   I'm wearing a robe for too long really [TS]

00:02:15   not guilty is the wrong word i feel [TS]

00:02:17   self-conscious [TS]

00:02:18   Yeah right sure indulgence I guess yeah [TS]

00:02:20   and so it's just the usual is the robe [TS]

00:02:23   invite you if you can say is this the [TS]

00:02:24   robe that you would use to prowl your [TS]

00:02:26   perimeter carrying a sword [TS]

00:02:28   no no let me walk you through the robes [TS]

00:02:30   the the longest robe the [TS]

00:02:33   longest-standing robe if not the longest [TS]

00:02:35   in length is a Pendleton row but that [TS]

00:02:38   belonged to my dad that is made out of [TS]

00:02:41   like the scrap the scratchy istanbul you [TS]

00:02:44   would not you would not make a blanket [TS]

00:02:45   for a horse out of this wall is so [TS]

00:02:48   scratchy but for some reason Pendleton [TS]

00:02:50   made it into a robe probably in the [TS]

00:02:53   authorities my dad had this whole life [TS]

00:02:55   then I stole it from him and and it was [TS]

00:02:58   an expression of like literally a [TS]

00:03:02   hairshirt i would put on this robe gotta [TS]

00:03:06   hit the head and then you're you're like [TS]

00:03:08   a wet horse at that point that's the [TS]

00:03:10   opposite of getting comfortable [TS]

00:03:11   yeah you would be in a scratchy robe and [TS]

00:03:12   you would walk around and kind of feel [TS]

00:03:14   like yes yes even if you've had some [TS]

00:03:16   corporeal sins through the day but you'd [TS]

00:03:19   like to relax and play some videogames [TS]

00:03:21   you put on your your horse hair shirt [TS]

00:03:23   horse road yeah I I it's like the bath [TS]

00:03:25   soothes you and then like jumping into a [TS]

00:03:27   cold pond you jump into a harsh robe who [TS]

00:03:31   totally harsh robe so then i said then [TS]

00:03:35   sometime as after I grew to adulthood I [TS]

00:03:39   was like I don't have to wear this robe [TS]

00:03:40   all the time [TS]

00:03:41   this is a robe to wear over silk pajamas [TS]

00:03:44   where the scratchiness of it isn't a [TS]

00:03:46   factor so then I got a a white [TS]

00:03:51   terrycloth robe like you would steal [TS]

00:03:53   from a hotel [TS]

00:03:54   whoo that's what I have yeah and I wear [TS]

00:03:56   that for a long time except the sleeves [TS]

00:03:58   were too short [TS]

00:03:59   ok so then i bought a blu terrycloth [TS]

00:04:03   robe and I made the classic mistake I do [TS]

00:04:05   this all the time i bought a double-xl [TS]

00:04:07   thinking that the sleeves were too short [TS]

00:04:11   in the old robe i'm going to get a [TS]

00:04:12   double XL [TS]

00:04:14   and um and that's gonna you know that's [TS]

00:04:18   gonna fit me properly but in fact in [TS]

00:04:22   fact I look like Rasputin in this thing [TS]

00:04:24   the sleeves are four feet too long [TS]

00:04:27   it's made for a 500 pound man that's [TS]

00:04:31   comfort country but that is the road but [TS]

00:04:34   that's the category area though you [TS]

00:04:35   think it's going to be more comfortable [TS]

00:04:36   because it's really big but but that's a [TS]

00:04:38   little too big [TS]

00:04:39   yeah exactly like wizard sleeves but it [TS]

00:04:41   was leaves [TS]

00:04:42   I mean a peter the great would lop off [TS]

00:04:44   my beard if he caught me in this robe [TS]

00:04:46   but uh but this is the road by we're out [TS]

00:04:49   into the yard this is the yard robe [TS]

00:04:51   ok because it wraps around you like a [TS]

00:04:54   Snuggie it's like going out into the [TS]

00:04:55   yard like in a terrycloth house and and [TS]

00:05:01   it's also midnight like in cotton yurt [TS]

00:05:03   yeah it's like you get exactly i could [TS]

00:05:05   pull it up over my head and build a [TS]

00:05:07   cooking fire but it's midnight blue also [TS]

00:05:10   sort exactly something like Hammacher [TS]

00:05:12   Schlemmer would come up with for [TS]

00:05:13   christmas time I i forget what the brand [TS]

00:05:15   of this thing is but it's it's something [TS]

00:05:17   like that it's like it's its design it's [TS]

00:05:19   basically designed for you and a friend [TS]

00:05:20   but admits that i have tested it and [TS]

00:05:24   raccoons cannot see it it's like it's [TS]

00:05:27   like a certain color and it has a kind [TS]

00:05:30   of shark skin quality that raccoons just [TS]

00:05:32   think it's like leaves blowing in the [TS]

00:05:34   wind [TS]

00:05:35   that's Andy and they'll walk right up on [TS]

00:05:37   you because sometimes you want to be [TS]

00:05:38   seen but then other times you want to be [TS]

00:05:40   able to move with some stealth if you [TS]

00:05:41   want to do some reconnaissance exactly i [TS]

00:05:44   don't know the kimonos are recent that [TS]

00:05:47   I've just been started classes for John [TS]

00:05:48   time that's just exactly that's for me I [TS]

00:05:51   got a less is not very interesting but [TS]

00:05:53   yeah we went to on our honeymoon on the [TS]

00:05:56   honey on our honeymoon with our moms and [TS]

00:05:57   and that we like the robe so much that [TS]

00:06:01   our moms on the sly bodice the first of [TS]

00:06:04   all that was at some Victorian gasthaus [TS]

00:06:08   gasps howls gasps house up in sonoma [TS]

00:06:11   county you're good yeah i got it was got [TS]

00:06:14   that place is amazing but yeah I feel [TS]

00:06:16   real real girly in it or or just people [TS]

00:06:21   oh I'm not well y'know I mean I get by [TS]

00:06:24   but yeah it's very big very thirsty very [TS]

00:06:27   comfortable [TS]

00:06:27   it's nice for coming out of the shower [TS]

00:06:28   but you let me let me ask you this year [TS]

00:06:31   your offices within a block of your [TS]

00:06:33   house would you walk to your office from [TS]

00:06:35   your house in this road oh my gosh that [TS]

00:06:37   is such a good question right because I [TS]

00:06:39   wasn't going to say anything but I'm hmm [TS]

00:06:42   I should cut this out i have noticed it [TS]

00:06:45   was occurring to me today when I came to [TS]

00:06:47   the office and I'd like to you know I [TS]

00:06:49   you know how triangulation works you [TS]

00:06:50   don't really too much richer but I [TS]

00:06:52   measured the time that it took when I [TS]

00:06:55   got this office and I could easily [TS]

00:06:57   listen to to like basically the first [TS]

00:07:01   two verses of thunder road is the amount [TS]

00:07:03   of time it takes me to go between the [TS]

00:07:05   two places I know your fan right and [TS]

00:07:07   it's very very close and it occurred to [TS]

00:07:10   me that like I've been at resorts and [TS]

00:07:12   large hotels where we take me far more [TS]

00:07:14   time to walk to the lobby of the hotel [TS]

00:07:16   that it takes me soon as I gotta go I [TS]

00:07:18   gotta do an internet thing right like a [TS]

00:07:20   TV related thing that's all I'm going to [TS]

00:07:21   say I gotta go do something at the [TS]

00:07:22   office and i have to tell you it this is [TS]

00:07:25   only really happened in the last 2-3 [TS]

00:07:27   weeks and I find the same way too much [TS]

00:07:29   my sartorial decisions for ambling [TS]

00:07:32   toward the office are getting more and [TS]

00:07:35   more informal uh-uh I don't know why [TS]

00:07:38   it's so this is funny timing because it [TS]

00:07:40   like for the last whatever for four [TS]

00:07:42   years I've had this office I would [TS]

00:07:44   always go get dressed like a gentleman [TS]

00:07:45   to go to the office i'll put on my holy [TS]

00:07:47   pants or whatever but yeah I have to [TS]

00:07:50   tell you like I've been sliding into [TS]

00:07:53   sweatpants territory to go to the office [TS]

00:07:56   well everybody on that block has seen [TS]

00:07:57   you go buy a million times they they [TS]

00:07:59   know you're you belong there [TS]

00:08:01   that's so freaky when that happens so [TS]

00:08:03   why not start just wearing a garbage bag [TS]

00:08:05   with armholes it doesn't breathe bad [TS]

00:08:09   trip [TS]

00:08:10   well I you know that's funny you should [TS]

00:08:12   say that too because I've also noticed [TS]

00:08:13   more often people saying things like oh [TS]

00:08:15   I saw you the other day [TS]

00:08:17   uh-huh like my lady at the KFC she'll [TS]

00:08:20   say I I see you walking by and I never [TS]

00:08:23   encouraged me to people can see me [TS]

00:08:24   walking by so I don't even know who sees [TS]

00:08:26   me and I've been i I've been here long [TS]

00:08:27   enough now that people are probably seen [TS]

00:08:28   me but people soon you but I i think i [TS]

00:08:31   turned a corner in the last week or so I [TS]

00:08:32   was really really i think yeah obviously [TS]

00:08:35   mention you last week I was really [TS]

00:08:37   really sick and we could go today [TS]

00:08:39   and I think my standards slip even [TS]

00:08:41   further I did something I never ever [TS]

00:08:43   ever do and now I'm definitely saying [TS]

00:08:44   too much I started going to the office [TS]

00:08:46   without my wallet [TS]

00:08:48   oh sure why would you need it i got my [TS]

00:08:50   phone and listen because I'm usually [TS]

00:08:52   listen to music or podcast and that's in [TS]

00:08:55   a jacket sleeve jacket pocket because [TS]

00:08:58   you know more in sweatpants but then I [TS]

00:08:59   don't even bother I just my question [TS]

00:09:01   John is like where will I be in say two [TS]

00:09:03   and a half months right well that's what [TS]

00:09:06   I'm saying it's just going to be you in [TS]

00:09:08   roller blades with the dish towel [TS]

00:09:09   wrapped around your waist that's a good [TS]

00:09:11   smart look but the thing is going to the [TS]

00:09:13   office without your wallet that puts you [TS]

00:09:16   in a problematic situation what if you [TS]

00:09:17   suddenly need two chili dogs [TS]

00:09:19   that's a really good point yeah back to [TS]

00:09:21   the house to keep it to keep a bucket of [TS]

00:09:23   change there at the desk [TS]

00:09:24   it's not it's not often the money thing [TS]

00:09:26   is is that that's a very good question [TS]

00:09:27   it's not even the money thing it's that [TS]

00:09:29   and I i berate my beloved wife about [TS]

00:09:31   this because she just like sometimes [TS]

00:09:33   goes out of the house without all the [TS]

00:09:35   kit and i'm a big believer you know I [TS]

00:09:37   carry a backpack that giant backpack [TS]

00:09:39   everywhere i go i'm always got [TS]

00:09:41   everything with me I've got several [TS]

00:09:42   forms of identification I've got cash I [TS]

00:09:45   got cards I've always gotta have several [TS]

00:09:47   if you want to talk about I several [TS]

00:09:48   heuristics for make sure I don't lose [TS]

00:09:49   things that are extremely interesting [TS]

00:09:51   phenomena miix you get mnemonics mama [TS]

00:09:54   cooks mom mnemonics I do actually [TS]

00:09:57   several i have seven marks involving [TS]

00:09:58   keys if you'd like to learn and because [TS]

00:10:02   my biggest fear but luckily and boy I'm [TS]

00:10:04   really saying too much now the door of [TS]

00:10:05   my office requires a key to get in sure [TS]

00:10:07   and then I want to get in i lock the [TS]

00:10:09   door with the same key so that's a [TS]

00:10:12   mnemonic right there right [TS]

00:10:14   got a life hack tool is actually it's [TS]

00:10:17   cuz the one key lifehack ya une oh yeah [TS]

00:10:20   the other day and I and my dad but now I [TS]

00:10:25   guess I I think about it and you know [TS]

00:10:27   how it is with life and substances where [TS]

00:10:29   you something starts out really simple [TS]

00:10:31   and then you find yourself challenging [TS]

00:10:33   yourself that idea of like can I throw [TS]

00:10:35   the beanbag a little bit further this [TS]

00:10:36   time and I'm just wondering i wonder if [TS]

00:10:39   i will get to a point where we should [TS]

00:10:40   probably capture this for later circle [TS]

00:10:42   barefoot I think you're going to make [TS]

00:10:43   that walk barefoot next time I i did [TS]

00:10:46   barefoot for a while in college I've [TS]

00:10:48   been barefoot but are you gonna make [TS]

00:10:49   that particular walk barefoot a question [TS]

00:10:52   knowing what you know about your [TS]

00:10:53   neighbor let's cut to the chase how long [TS]

00:10:55   will it be before I put on a comfortable [TS]

00:10:58   warm jacket and look to the office in my [TS]

00:11:01   underwear is a long t-shirt nothing else [TS]

00:11:04   yeah I could do that now that lady [TS]

00:11:06   walked up a lady walk to her office [TS]

00:11:08   I don't want to be a normative but if a [TS]

00:11:10   lady walked her office and repair that [TS]

00:11:12   would seem like a penthouse forum thing [TS]

00:11:14   listen my favorite thing in the world is [TS]

00:11:17   a lady in a trench coat with nothing [TS]

00:11:19   else have you forgotten that I mean I [TS]

00:11:22   don't want to have to cut this all out [TS]

00:11:24   ok but you know maybe they're living in [TS]

00:11:27   a song that used to be a special thing [TS]

00:11:29   which song you can say oh it's in it [TS]

00:11:31   while it's in an unreleased song but [TS]

00:11:33   it's in there not moving to Portland to [TS]

00:11:35   get song [TS]

00:11:36   yeah I I don't know I you know what will [TS]

00:11:42   probably do an awkward call an offline [TS]

00:11:44   follow up about this i'm not sure i want [TS]

00:11:46   to triangulate any more than I have at [TS]

00:11:47   this point I'm probably hexagonal aiding [TS]

00:11:49   sure but I have a feeling I'm knowing [TS]

00:11:53   how I am and knowing you know you know [TS]

00:11:55   how I mean I'm scared of everything [TS]

00:11:56   well yeah I'm sure you suggested for me [TS]

00:11:59   uh-huh was driven by fear was that the [TS]

00:12:02   shirt you that I could get up in very [TS]

00:12:04   very tiny letters like I want people to [TS]

00:12:07   be able to read it but that but they're [TS]

00:12:09   button button of those like dripping [TS]

00:12:11   paint letters really small dripping [TS]

00:12:13   paint letters [TS]

00:12:14   what do you mean like like a tease [TS]

00:12:16   rollerskating leadership is matter of [TS]

00:12:17   our shipping papers from them all put a [TS]

00:12:21   little kitty cat on a branch of Friday's [TS]

00:12:23   coming i have been I could see myself [TS]

00:12:25   pushing myself to that and saying [TS]

00:12:27   because you know it is that it's like [TS]

00:12:28   procrastination it's like any kind of [TS]

00:12:31   like like substance abuse or anything [TS]

00:12:32   when you get away with something for [TS]

00:12:34   awhile you eventually you can see how [TS]

00:12:37   far you can i'm a i'm a tonight just [TS]

00:12:40   walk home with my wagon just see if i [TS]

00:12:41   can do it i mean you know at a certain [TS]

00:12:43   hour there is nothing i mean i have i've [TS]

00:12:46   made a practice of wandering around sort [TS]

00:12:49   of that my local neighborhood in nothing [TS]

00:12:52   but a bathrobe and a sword [TS]

00:12:54   yeah and I find it incredibly liberating [TS]

00:12:56   but would I get into the car in a [TS]

00:12:59   bathroom and a sword know first of all [TS]

00:13:02   no I know why [TS]

00:13:04   see I i think this is something we have [TS]

00:13:06   in common is it and I I i would like to [TS]

00:13:09   think that this drives your mates as [TS]

00:13:11   crazy as it drives my mates but i really [TS]

00:13:14   like to walk through i like to think [TS]

00:13:16   through like if we're driving somewhere [TS]

00:13:18   okay but we better bring a blanket [TS]

00:13:19   because what if something happens with [TS]

00:13:21   the car looks actually talk about their [TS]

00:13:22   we should have some energy bars sure in [TS]

00:13:25   some gallons of water and struggling [TS]

00:13:27   t-bones the car and you're the only one [TS]

00:13:29   you and everyone else is knocked [TS]

00:13:31   unconscious and you have to escape [TS]

00:13:33   through a side window [TS]

00:13:34   yes haha are you going to get your [TS]

00:13:36   fucking bathrobe tangled in the rearview [TS]

00:13:38   mirror [TS]

00:13:38   it seems so simple you could drive naked [TS]

00:13:41   for years and never have a problem and [TS]

00:13:43   then one day it's before you realize you [TS]

00:13:45   forgot your driver's license and now [TS]

00:13:46   you're entering a world of pain [TS]

00:13:47   yeah well you would bring one ring [TS]

00:13:49   Yahtzee and water and be ready this is [TS]

00:13:52   why I don't get a belly button piercing [TS]

00:13:53   I've said it before I don't want [TS]

00:13:55   anything that could possibly get snagged [TS]

00:13:58   if I have to go over chain-link fence [TS]

00:13:59   and a and I think you should make all of [TS]

00:14:03   your life decisions based on is there a [TS]

00:14:06   chance I'm gonna have to go over a [TS]

00:14:07   chain-link fence at some point today and [TS]

00:14:09   when I go walk around my perimeter in my [TS]

00:14:11   bathrobe I make sure I'm there's never a [TS]

00:14:13   fence between me and and the front door [TS]

00:14:16   behind which is my you know small bag in [TS]

00:14:18   my arsenal of medieval weapons [TS]

00:14:22   I said you don't use it you know it's [TS]

00:14:24   there you know you're missing is your [TS]

00:14:25   mentally prepared you know you even you [TS]

00:14:28   know even if it doesn't come up it may [TS]

00:14:30   not come up for years and then make them [TS]

00:14:32   up like three times in a couple days [TS]

00:14:33   just like Mossad is after you or [TS]

00:14:35   something they did i'm just saying i get [TS]

00:14:37   into this all the time with people and [TS]

00:14:39   their stupid shoes so make your shoes as [TS]

00:14:42   fancy as you want i don't get make them [TS]

00:14:44   ten feet tall have a fishbowl in the [TS]

00:14:46   souls but if you cannot either get the [TS]

00:14:50   heck out of those shoes in a hurry [TS]

00:14:52   and-and-and make the pace or like make [TS]

00:14:56   the pace in the shoes but anytime I'm [TS]

00:14:59   like walking around and all of a sudden [TS]

00:15:00   I'm Mike holding hands with with it with [TS]

00:15:02   an instant gimp right like we look great [TS]

00:15:05   at the party and then it's like hey we [TS]

00:15:07   like it's only two-and-a-half blocks up [TS]

00:15:09   and a block and a half over to get to [TS]

00:15:11   the get to the next party and they're [TS]

00:15:13   like oh and all of a sudden insta GIMP [TS]

00:15:16   and there was little [TS]

00:15:17   open and there's feet are bleeding i [TS]

00:15:18   brought my kitten heel do you live in [TS]

00:15:21   the world that I kiss your feet your [TS]

00:15:23   feet would have you would have been fine [TS]

00:15:25   and pretty much I mean that they're the [TS]

00:15:29   the great pantheon of women shoes [TS]

00:15:31   includes plenty of cute little shoes [TS]

00:15:34   that can also be used to scale offense [TS]

00:15:37   let's be honest there are a lot there's [TS]

00:15:39   a lot of very handsome boots that a lady [TS]

00:15:41   can wear that are there they're [TS]

00:15:42   attractive and they're comfortable and [TS]

00:15:45   they're they're ready for evading the [TS]

00:15:47   song that comes up when it comes up this [TS]

00:15:49   is what i'm asking you Merlin [TS]

00:15:50   high-fashion for many many many years [TS]

00:15:53   high-fashion I'm talking about like the [TS]

00:15:55   the real high stuff the Italian and [TS]

00:16:00   French super you know like custom-made [TS]

00:16:04   fashion who those crazies have been [TS]

00:16:08   marching a their runway models up and [TS]

00:16:12   down this up and down the street in [TS]

00:16:14   logger boots for like 30 years now [TS]

00:16:16   there's nothing there's nothing new to [TS]

00:16:19   it right [TS]

00:16:20   giant like gene Simmons kiss boots and [TS]

00:16:23   motorcycle boots [TS]

00:16:25   why don't all women just take the q that [TS]

00:16:29   that is the best shoe if you just have a [TS]

00:16:32   knee-high motorcycle boot it goes with [TS]

00:16:34   everything right [TS]

00:16:36   yak I don't understand I don't know that [TS]

00:16:39   we have we have crossed this bridge and [TS]

00:16:41   cross it and cross them cross that and [TS]

00:16:42   yet I keep seeing pumps I keep seeing [TS]

00:16:45   people choosing pumps [TS]

00:16:48   well you understand why that is I mean [TS]

00:16:49   that they're there is a mixture foot [TS]

00:16:51   look like it makes the girls foot look [TS]

00:16:53   like a cloven hoof okay yeah i guess [TS]

00:16:56   that's Blaine Victor doesn't make them [TS]

00:16:58   it makes it makes your butt stick out [TS]

00:17:00   you walk you walk cute you look tall [TS]

00:17:03   there's a lot a lot of things to [TS]

00:17:04   recommend them but the problem is it's [TS]

00:17:07   one thing to be like in the court of [TS]

00:17:11   louie the what 14 it wasn't to be in a [TS]

00:17:14   loony court where the whole idea is you [TS]

00:17:17   are deliberately wearing completely [TS]

00:17:19   impractical close to show how powerful [TS]

00:17:22   you are right to express your wealth and [TS]

00:17:23   your and the fact that no one will [TS]

00:17:25   require you to lift a thing except your [TS]

00:17:28   petticoats to go to the bathroom behind [TS]

00:17:29   the car [TS]

00:17:30   order to hide a page or uh four horsemen [TS]

00:17:33   hello could you hide under a petticoat I [TS]

00:17:36   saw a doctor who were he had under [TS]

00:17:37   address i would happily hide under a [TS]

00:17:39   petticoat and this is that this is the [TS]

00:17:41   ecology standard there could you bring [TS]

00:17:42   water depends on who's petticoat who I [TS]

00:17:46   was thinking about this the other day [TS]

00:17:47   you know i'm often bemoaning the fact [TS]

00:17:49   that people address so Shapley when [TS]

00:17:52   there are so many wonderful ways to [TS]

00:17:53   address that are just as comfortable as [TS]

00:17:54   shabby dressing and I was talking to my [TS]

00:17:58   mom I was reflecting on like oh you know [TS]

00:18:00   when you were a kid or back in the [TS]

00:18:02   forties like everybody dressed great and [TS]

00:18:05   it was such a much better way of his so [TS]

00:18:08   much more more more beautiful world when [TS]

00:18:12   every all men in suits and all women [TS]

00:18:14   dresses and just you know everybody's [TS]

00:18:16   wearing a hat it's like I I long for it [TS]

00:18:19   even though I only saw the tail end of [TS]

00:18:21   it in my mind it was real I mean if you [TS]

00:18:25   deserve newsreels up until Kennedy every [TS]

00:18:27   guy always wear a hat [TS]

00:18:29   yeah but what my mom said is what the [TS]

00:18:31   photographs cannot convey is that [TS]

00:18:33   everybody smelled to high heaven then [TS]

00:18:36   like it was before deodorant had been [TS]

00:18:40   invented and so the so maybe like the [TS]

00:18:44   opposite of x so people doused [TS]

00:18:47   themselves with perfumes and powders so [TS]

00:18:50   rich people smelled like Victoria's [TS]

00:18:53   Secret dressing rooms it and poor people [TS]

00:18:56   just smelled like toilets and so [TS]

00:19:00   everywhere you went every public [TS]

00:19:01   transportation just walking down the [TS]

00:19:03   sidewalk you just assaulted constantly [TS]

00:19:05   assaulted by by poopin powder and you [TS]

00:19:11   know now you could you when you're in a [TS]

00:19:14   public space and there's somebody that [TS]

00:19:15   smells strongly either strongly a [TS]

00:19:18   perfumer strongly body odor it stands [TS]

00:19:21   out you're like oh my god you person [TS]

00:19:23   come on get a grip but my mom said back [TS]

00:19:26   and you know back in the thirties and [TS]

00:19:27   forties like everybody just wreaked I [TS]

00:19:31   bet part of that was you got first of [TS]

00:19:33   all just let's step 0 yet wool right you [TS]

00:19:36   have probably had a lot of stuff that [TS]

00:19:38   had to be dry-cleaned you're wearing [TS]

00:19:39   wool suits all your room [TS]

00:19:41   I think people Oh [TS]

00:19:42   and fewer clothes then probably yeah you [TS]

00:19:46   took care of them and you mended them [TS]

00:19:47   couple of suits three or four suits if [TS]

00:19:49   you were a normal person i ordered i [TS]

00:19:51   ordered 12 pairs of socks a from amazon [TS]

00:19:55   is it really is that simple and then [TS]

00:19:58   what what what time to let stuff like [TS]

00:19:59   that pretty pedestrian so to speak [TS]

00:20:02   yeah white gold is there a global white [TS]

00:20:05   gold toes you know what's going on the [TS]

00:20:07   pad thing but you know your your good [TS]

00:20:09   friend Jesse Thorne gave me a real [TS]

00:20:10   lecture one time because i was wearing [TS]

00:20:12   white gold toes with a suit [TS]

00:20:14   well he's got a lot of lectures in him [TS]

00:20:15   we I I checked though in the last time [TS]

00:20:19   that i bought on one of my mass orders [TS]

00:20:21   was August like that's how recently so [TS]

00:20:24   my thing is like not today that this how [TS]

00:20:26   crazy we are today like today you know [TS]

00:20:27   you would buy a VCR but you by the [TS]

00:20:30   electronic devices you don't get them [TS]

00:20:31   fixed but it used to be like now I [TS]

00:20:34   discovered I had a pair of socks on the [TS]

00:20:35   other day I had I had a hole in my sock [TS]

00:20:37   which i get about twice a year because I [TS]

00:20:40   throw them out when they get to gross i [TS]

00:20:42   think that then you would have closed [TS]

00:20:43   you might have 5-10 year old underwear [TS]

00:20:45   like as just a matter of course I only [TS]

00:20:47   say I think that wall you get a dress [TS]

00:20:49   for work so if you had to wear a suit to [TS]

00:20:51   work [TS]

00:20:52   not everybody's just adore not everybody [TS]

00:20:53   has a lot of fancy suits in the tri [TS]

00:20:56   forties you wear the same suit you wore [TS]

00:20:57   yesterday and the suit award the day [TS]

00:20:59   before also john foundation where I [TS]

00:21:01   think for ladies [TS]

00:21:02   I mean I think a lot if you watch go [TS]

00:21:03   back and look at those a all like the [TS]

00:21:06   shapes that women have are not Cheryl no [TS]

00:21:09   10 layers of underwear [TS]

00:21:10   yeah so so now this is a lot of wash [TS]

00:21:13   we're talking about 1940 now the modern [TS]

00:21:15   era now imagine how people smelled in [TS]

00:21:17   1840 I heard that I've heard I don't [TS]

00:21:20   want to I don't want to sound like I'm [TS]

00:21:22   looking down my nose at the French cuz i [TS]

00:21:23   know that's the thing i do so to speak [TS]

00:21:25   but the but i've heard people were [TS]

00:21:27   pretty stinky back there well not alone [TS]

00:21:30   are still pretty stinky and France but I [TS]

00:21:33   mean people everywhere like I think this [TS]

00:21:35   is one of the things that we never [TS]

00:21:36   talked about what when we talk about [TS]

00:21:39   time travel [TS]

00:21:40   I think the most i think the most [TS]

00:21:42   extraordinary aspect of travelling back [TS]

00:21:45   in time would be that you would land and [TS]

00:21:47   immediately you your senses that cannot [TS]

00:21:50   be conveyed by phone film like your your [TS]

00:21:53   smell senses [TS]

00:21:54   would be assaulted immediately if you [TS]

00:21:57   met with the lower east side must have [TS]

00:21:59   smelled like in like the 19-teens right [TS]

00:22:02   anybody that amazing but like you know [TS]

00:22:04   when there's a lot of people there you [TS]

00:22:06   know probably not super fancy you got [TS]

00:22:08   all those different ethnic foods going [TS]

00:22:10   on another note Roman animals like in [TS]

00:22:14   the streets right i mean you're not [TS]

00:22:16   lower east side you're not going to the [TS]

00:22:18   still local whole foods like whole foods [TS]

00:22:22   the organic chicken place you are like [TS]

00:22:24   grabbing a chicken off the roof or [TS]

00:22:26   whatever and and cutting its throat and [TS]

00:22:28   then I mean he would be the streets [TS]

00:22:31   would be running with blood and offal [TS]

00:22:33   and and poop and pee food and and yet we [TS]

00:22:39   look at those pictures and were like oh [TS]

00:22:41   while several times cheese people with [TS]

00:22:45   the families might might might that the [TS]

00:22:47   history of my whole my whole story of [TS]

00:22:50   travel like the first time I left [TS]

00:22:52   because in Alaska right or Seattle or I [TS]

00:22:55   mean seattle was built sort of largely [TS]

00:23:00   constructed in the last hundred years [TS]

00:23:02   san franciscans older but Alaska in 1940 [TS]

00:23:09   Anchorage was like for pup tents and a [TS]

00:23:14   windmill so the entire city has been [TS]

00:23:18   built since the advent of every all mod [TS]

00:23:23   cons right so growing up in Anchorage [TS]

00:23:26   there was no opportunity to ever smell [TS]

00:23:29   an open sewer it just would never happen [TS]

00:23:31   and my first experience of going to I [TS]

00:23:35   mean I then it really it happened the [TS]

00:23:37   first time I went to New York City to be [TS]

00:23:38   in a city full of people and to smell [TS]

00:23:41   something come up out of a hole in the [TS]

00:23:43   ground that suggested the amazing warren [TS]

00:23:48   of pipes of dookie pipes I was you know [TS]

00:23:55   like I i had to control my retching [TS]

00:23:57   because I because the spell was [TS]

00:23:59   unfamiliar and also I knew what it [TS]

00:24:01   represented and then the first time I [TS]

00:24:04   went to Europe and you know the streets [TS]

00:24:05   of Paris or just straight [TS]

00:24:06   rune with feces really well because they [TS]

00:24:10   don't curb their dogs their first of all [TS]

00:24:12   so it's considered part of being a [TS]

00:24:15   Parisian that you take your shitty [TS]

00:24:17   little dog out and walk down the street [TS]

00:24:19   and just let it shit anywhere [TS]

00:24:21   yeah like that's it's actually like it [TS]

00:24:23   was a cultural problem we keep helping [TS]

00:24:25   them they are really adamant about it [TS]

00:24:29   and they eat take don't they like go to [TS]

00:24:31   the table at a cafe your dog can sit [TS]

00:24:33   there [TS]

00:24:33   absolutely i have its part it's part of [TS]

00:24:36   the Gallic culture i don't understand it [TS]

00:24:38   I don't I can't judge that's don't know [TS]

00:24:40   just that that's got to be just they're [TS]

00:24:41   being deliberately annoying they are [TS]

00:24:43   being deliberately annoying and they're [TS]

00:24:44   so there's poop everywhere and then also [TS]

00:24:47   Paris was built by the Romans and I'm [TS]

00:24:51   sure that the I'm sure that the [TS]

00:24:52   underlying fundamental foundational [TS]

00:24:56   sewer system is still Roman it's still [TS]

00:24:59   just like terracotta like poop tumblers [TS]

00:25:03   right you just it's like gravity fed [TS]

00:25:05   tumble the loop down and it was let's be [TS]

00:25:09   honest that's it was pretty advanced for [TS]

00:25:11   its time it was incredible 2,000 years [TS]

00:25:13   ago but I'm sure whatever you know [TS]

00:25:15   anytime you go into a into a European [TS]

00:25:17   bathroom the first thing that you're [TS]

00:25:19   struck by is like that's your toilet and [TS]

00:25:22   that's your bathtub like interesting [TS]

00:25:25   like like so much of so much we share so [TS]

00:25:29   much with Europe but the kitchen [TS]

00:25:31   appliances and the bathroom facilities [TS]

00:25:34   are always just a little bit off like [TS]

00:25:36   they like somebody was doing a film [TS]

00:25:38   design and it's kind of like the cars in [TS]

00:25:42   sleeper the Woody Allen film you know [TS]

00:25:46   that the cars and sleeper from the [TS]

00:25:47   future but you can tell that it's just [TS]

00:25:49   it's just like a paper mache car over [TS]

00:25:53   the top of a little ewwy magretta like [TS]

00:25:56   their feet w is in that [TS]

00:25:58   yeah maybe under under some crazy some [TS]

00:26:02   crazy body fake bodywork and that's what [TS]

00:26:04   I always feel like when I'm looking at [TS]

00:26:05   at a at a European dishwasher or paper [TS]

00:26:08   or a bathtub it's just like really [TS]

00:26:10   really everything's kind of little like [TS]

00:26:13   what you have been to Europe but I've [TS]

00:26:14   been to England and everything's seems [TS]

00:26:18   very compact [TS]

00:26:19   the thing that strikes me about New York [TS]

00:26:20   I haven't been there and been to [TS]

00:26:21   Manhattan in a while but he should [TS]

00:26:23   change that you know you and I should go [TS]

00:26:25   to Manhattan and do a show we got to [TS]

00:26:26   talk about a lot of things [TS]

00:26:28   yeah i heard you're writing a book or we [TS]

00:26:29   can cut all this okay um we got a lot to [TS]

00:26:32   talk about but out whenever I go to New [TS]

00:26:34   York last time i was there are staying [TS]

00:26:35   in the garment district and I remember [TS]

00:26:37   uh you know how like you realize [TS]

00:26:39   something for a long time and then you [TS]

00:26:40   find it like finally like realize the [TS]

00:26:42   name for what it is [TS]

00:26:43   it was like and I was like I was in a [TS]

00:26:45   pretty god i was lucky enough to be in a [TS]

00:26:49   pretty quiet hotel all things considered [TS]

00:26:52   but still you can look out the window [TS]

00:26:53   and just all night long [TS]

00:26:56   there's something going on all the time [TS]

00:26:58   in New York City and and that's so [TS]

00:27:01   different from almost anywhere I've ever [TS]

00:27:02   lived including San Francisco San [TS]

00:27:04   Francisco everything closes up pretty [TS]

00:27:05   early [TS]

00:27:05   yeah bye-bye really any sooner annoying [TS]

00:27:08   yeah metropolitan city standards but in [TS]

00:27:10   a city new york really feels like an [TS]

00:27:14   organism it feels like a big breathing [TS]

00:27:17   eating pissing shitting organism and [TS]

00:27:20   like there's just trucks delivering [TS]

00:27:22   stuff in crazy places and crazy times [TS]

00:27:24   their hosing down the street and it [TS]

00:27:26   really feels like a brood like there's [TS]

00:27:28   this you know what I mean like that I [TS]

00:27:30   guess it's probably cities like that in [TS]

00:27:32   Europe but new york manhattan really [TS]

00:27:34   feels like that to me it really feels [TS]

00:27:35   like like a giant complex animal that we [TS]

00:27:39   just happen to be living on for a little [TS]

00:27:40   while [TS]

00:27:41   yeah well that the the the great thing [TS]

00:27:44   about Manhattan is there are no Ali's [TS]

00:27:46   right at most cities that were built in [TS]

00:27:49   America were built with Ali's for [TS]

00:27:52   delivery and trash right and all the [TS]

00:27:55   facilities right awps person in [TS]

00:27:57   Manhattan you're like oh my god you're [TS]

00:28:00   you're a fucking wizard what are you [TS]

00:28:01   doing [TS]

00:28:02   they all are wizards everybody they have [TS]

00:28:04   the same UPS truck UPS truck series park [TS]

00:28:06   where they want for as long as they want [TS]

00:28:07   and there they just they have to go to [TS]

00:28:09   the most improbable places in the [TS]

00:28:11   craziest traffic i don't know anyone [TS]

00:28:13   survives it [TS]

00:28:13   yeah the people there learn to park on [TS]

00:28:15   top of fun polls because you are like [TS]

00:28:18   everywhere you are it's to talk about [TS]

00:28:21   keep moving and get out of the way like [TS]

00:28:22   as soon as you stop moving there you are [TS]

00:28:24   in 500 people's way [TS]

00:28:26   and so everybody just keeps and-and-and [TS]

00:28:28   like like I say no Ali's no back doors [TS]

00:28:31   to anything so all deliveries all [TS]

00:28:34   garbage [TS]

00:28:35   it all has to come in and out through [TS]

00:28:37   the same front door that business is [TS]

00:28:40   being conducted through and everybody's [TS]

00:28:42   coming in and out at all times you know [TS]

00:28:44   there's no the city can't afford to rest [TS]

00:28:47   because there's no such thing as like I [TS]

00:28:49   just put that out back [TS]

00:28:51   well we'll figure it out oh there's [TS]

00:28:53   there's no there's no place like here [TS]

00:28:55   you might say oh you know drop off my [TS]

00:28:57   delivery you know in this you know go [TS]

00:29:00   through this access door and go leave it [TS]

00:29:02   here in this space everything is public [TS]

00:29:04   it's all it's all happening and if you [TS]

00:29:06   put something out on the sidewalk and [TS]

00:29:09   someone will move into it it will go [TS]

00:29:12   away yeah people are like a look at this [TS]

00:29:14   room and so the the yeah the the city [TS]

00:29:18   just but but but i but i think it's the [TS]

00:29:21   most amazing place you know like at any [TS]

00:29:23   hour of the of the day four o'clock in [TS]

00:29:25   the morning you can go only a couple of [TS]

00:29:30   blocks from where you are wherever that [TS]

00:29:32   is and walk into a place and say I would [TS]

00:29:34   like a four-course meal [TS]

00:29:36   yeah i would like chicken parmesan and [TS]

00:29:39   apple pie and decaf coffee and let's say [TS]

00:29:45   for instance calamari fried calamari and [TS]

00:29:49   there will be people there that think [TS]

00:29:51   that's the most reasonable thing in the [TS]

00:29:52   world and they will bring it to you with [TS]

00:29:54   no comment and there will be people all [TS]

00:29:56   around you having similar meals and just [TS]

00:29:58   like yeah for its that that's right [TS]

00:30:00   that's right world [TS]

00:30:01   here's what's crazy about that so like [TS]

00:30:03   in San Francisco is just I don't know it [TS]

00:30:06   you know it's a really weird place like [TS]

00:30:07   there's not that many fast-food places [TS]

00:30:09   there's not that many gas stations [TS]

00:30:10   there's all kinds of stuff with the like [TS]

00:30:12   we've let other places take care of that [TS]

00:30:15   there's not nearly as much of that kind [TS]

00:30:16   of stuff there's a small version of a [TS]

00:30:18   gas station here and so forth but like [TS]

00:30:21   in Florida so that that's pretty weird [TS]

00:30:22   for a theoretically metropolitan place [TS]

00:30:25   like in Florida Marlins in Florida there [TS]

00:30:27   were all kinds of places that were open [TS]

00:30:29   24 hours [TS]

00:30:31   they're like giant like enormous like 24 [TS]

00:30:34   pump gas stations with a blimpies inside [TS]

00:30:36   that were open fucking 24 hours a day [TS]

00:30:39   walmart the walmart is open 2014 going [TS]

00:30:41   to buy a lawnmower in the middle of the [TS]

00:30:43   night but here's the difference so we [TS]

00:30:45   don't have that here in Florida you go [TS]

00:30:47   there but you know it's there in the [TS]

00:30:48   middle of the night loonies like the [TS]

00:30:50   holy people at these places at two in [TS]

00:30:52   the morning are there for something [TS]

00:30:54   lurid generally but the crazy what [TS]

00:30:57   you're describing about Manhattan the [TS]

00:30:58   party never could get my head around [TS]

00:30:59   this exactly what you described you walk [TS]

00:31:01   in and there and like you go ahead and [TS]

00:31:03   you okay i'm drunk i ordered calamari [TS]

00:31:05   know like it's everybody in there it's [TS]

00:31:08   totally normal it's a it's a 24-hour [TS]

00:31:10   town [TS]

00:31:11   yeah and i have no context for a place [TS]

00:31:13   where you would just go and go you know [TS]

00:31:14   what I want to go get some pretty above [TS]

00:31:16   average Greek food at four-twenty in the [TS]

00:31:20   morning [TS]

00:31:20   yeah I've never experienced that I don't [TS]

00:31:23   and arteries there's a guy in there [TS]

00:31:25   working on his novel there are two [TS]

00:31:26   sweethearts canoodling lost just like to [TS]

00:31:28   senior citizens you like what are you [TS]

00:31:30   doing is here in the middle of the night [TS]

00:31:32   yeah that's so suspicious everywhere [TS]

00:31:34   I've ever lived to be out after targets [TS]

00:31:37   like the Middle Ages it's like what why [TS]

00:31:38   would you be at this place now for more [TS]

00:31:41   than why would you be anywhere in the [TS]

00:31:43   middle of the night for an hour unless [TS]

00:31:44   it was for something release sketchy [TS]

00:31:46   well and I and as I Drive around my own [TS]

00:31:49   town in the middle of the night [TS]

00:31:51   reflecting on why the fuck everybody is [TS]

00:31:53   not out hanging out with each other [TS]

00:31:56   I can't but come back to that we are all [TS]

00:32:01   at home watching television like it's [TS]

00:32:04   not that everybody is asleep [TS]

00:32:06   it is that everybody is watching uh like [TS]

00:32:10   workout commercials and weight loss [TS]

00:32:13   commercials alone in their own little [TS]

00:32:16   sanctums and not making that small extra [TS]

00:32:21   effort to go to the one place that is [TS]

00:32:24   open and just sit and like read a paper [TS]

00:32:26   bag or whatever if you're up at that [TS]

00:32:28   hour at least I like that's that that is [TS]

00:32:31   the one time of day I do like to be in a [TS]

00:32:33   place where there you know there's a [TS]

00:32:35   little hustle bustle and people are [TS]

00:32:36   around females like that like a waffle [TS]

00:32:38   house kind of scene [TS]

00:32:39   well we don't have waffle houses but but [TS]

00:32:42   you don't really like someplace like [TS]

00:32:43   that someplace where you could go and [TS]

00:32:45   just like a Denny's type [TS]

00:32:46   yeah a little diner you get a piece of [TS]

00:32:48   pie with a cup of coffee and you write [TS]

00:32:51   in your journal or e-reader you read a [TS]

00:32:53   up but the paperback I mean I feel like [TS]

00:32:56   that experience it is one that we all [TS]

00:33:01   take for granted we all think of as kind [TS]

00:33:04   of like oh that's kind of lonely like [TS]

00:33:05   you're in the middle of the night you're [TS]

00:33:06   having a piece of pie reading a book but [TS]

00:33:08   in fact I think those are the greatest [TS]

00:33:10   experiences and that we should also seek [TS]

00:33:12   out that kind of thing because what what [TS]

00:33:16   where the thing that that replaces is [TS]

00:33:19   not sitting around carving a turkey with [TS]

00:33:22   your family and friends it replaces [TS]

00:33:24   sitting in front of a TV watching [TS]

00:33:26   garbage in the middle of the night you [TS]

00:33:28   know to to replace tell to replace [TS]

00:33:32   solitary television watching with any [TS]

00:33:34   other thing is a is a net improvement to [TS]

00:33:39   replace solitary television watching [TS]

00:33:40   with a walk around the block to replace [TS]

00:33:43   solitary television watching with a [TS]

00:33:44   cigarette out on the back porch [TS]

00:33:46   shivering in your nightgown is like [TS]

00:33:50   ultimately I think better for our [TS]

00:33:51   spirits then then just that that passive [TS]

00:33:56   TV I I and particularly sitting in a [TS]

00:34:00   restaurant in the middle of the night [TS]

00:34:02   and read writing in your journal on [TS]

00:34:03   having a piece of pie and a cup of [TS]

00:34:04   coffee [TS]

00:34:05   I mean those are the those are moments i [TS]

00:34:08   really cherish and that and and and that [TS]

00:34:11   that whole like I'm dining by myself yes [TS]

00:34:14   it is a table for one yes [TS]

00:34:16   like that's the thing I'm I i I'm I'm [TS]

00:34:19   always very proud in those moments like [TS]

00:34:21   I am it is a table for one sir [TS]

00:34:24   bring me a pie and coffee ravu and and [TS]

00:34:29   people's of people are are embarrassed [TS]

00:34:31   to dine by themselves like gas but i [TS]

00:34:34   think it's i think dining by yourself as [TS]

00:34:36   the ultimate power move especially if [TS]

00:34:39   you have a book you know when someone [TS]

00:34:41   you going somewhere you just want to get [TS]

00:34:43   me on they say just one [TS]

00:34:45   yeah I say [TS]

00:34:48   yes 10 know i like i like myself I like [TS]

00:34:54   going to the movies by myself going to [TS]

00:34:56   the movies by yourself is the best yeah [TS]

00:34:58   but i think you're right i think people [TS]

00:35:00   that reads as lonely [TS]

00:35:02   well I and I really feel like I feel [TS]

00:35:04   like those moments I mean not to be 22 [TS]

00:35:08   like late eighties early nineties um [TS]

00:35:12   like cherish yourself culture but what I [TS]

00:35:17   really do miss the fact that ability to [TS]

00:35:20   feel like shit up the chairs yourself [TS]

00:35:23   era of like you remember when the baby [TS]

00:35:26   boomers really really first started just [TS]

00:35:28   to realize that they were they still [TS]

00:35:31   didn't believe they were gonna die but [TS]

00:35:32   they did start to did start to their [TS]

00:35:34   hair started to fall out and now they [TS]

00:35:36   were the worst they couldn't see I [TS]

00:35:37   remember the last words realize they [TS]

00:35:39   were gonna die before they realized all [TS]

00:35:40   that slightly Robinson and that's the [TS]

00:35:43   thing that they were and that's when [TS]

00:35:44   they went through their big like we need [TS]

00:35:45   to cherish ourselves we every moment is [TS]

00:35:48   precious like all of that and of course [TS]

00:35:50   you and I were 20 25 years younger than [TS]

00:35:53   they were and and being given this [TS]

00:35:55   information like cherish ourselves [TS]

00:35:58   I hate myself yeah I hate myself as God [TS]

00:36:02   intended wooden cherish my sufficient [TS]

00:36:04   yeah but now I'm starting to see like [TS]

00:36:06   you know what there are it is you don't [TS]

00:36:08   have to buy something expensive [TS]

00:36:09   cherishing yourself is just taking [TS]

00:36:11   yourself to the fucking movies [TS]

00:36:13   well I i don't want to sound defensive [TS]

00:36:16   as somebody who enjoys watching [TS]

00:36:18   extremely good TV and movies and so are [TS]

00:36:21   no no you are curating your way might my [TS]

00:36:24   taste is outstanding [TS]

00:36:26   it's incredible you should have there [TS]

00:36:28   should be there should be an Amazon that [TS]

00:36:30   is just things that Merlin likes it's [TS]

00:36:33   pretty good idea and I used to be one I [TS]

00:36:35   could do that [TS]

00:36:36   ah I i think i think people are just a [TS]

00:36:41   lot of people don't say that they're [TS]

00:36:43   scared of being alone i will say i think [TS]

00:36:46   people are uncomfortable being seen [TS]

00:36:49   being alone and I think that we kind of [TS]

00:36:53   are meant to feel badly about ourselves [TS]

00:36:55   if we're in public by ourselves like [TS]

00:36:57   unless you're going to get a pap smear [TS]

00:36:59   or abortion [TS]

00:37:01   it's alright i always offer my services [TS]

00:37:05   to take women to their pap smears to be [TS]

00:37:06   yelling at Lincoln smear buddy [TS]

00:37:08   yeah you just you know you don't wanna [TS]

00:37:10   go do that by yourself I'll go with you [TS]

00:37:11   to your smear you know what's it like [TS]

00:37:13   you do that's a super nice thing [TS]

00:37:15   somebody who's just there just there you [TS]

00:37:18   can sit there you can read a fishing [TS]

00:37:19   magazine in the in the lobby while it's [TS]

00:37:21   happening [TS]

00:37:22   I've got going with some friends to [TS]

00:37:23   their abortions and sat in the sat in [TS]

00:37:26   the armored lobby with every other woman [TS]

00:37:31   in the place really really glaring [TS]

00:37:33   coming up being folds song yourself [TS]

00:37:35   glaring at me while I read women's wear [TS]

00:37:37   daily and because that is a thing where [TS]

00:37:40   you need a you really do need a friend [TS]

00:37:42   and often the culprit is not a friend [TS]

00:37:45   well I i was what's that saying ladies [TS]

00:37:48   who get abortions or lonely just think [TS]

00:37:51   that we're supposed to feel like a [TS]

00:37:52   know-it-all again this is just well [TS]

00:37:54   there's another part of this which is [TS]

00:37:56   that suburban culture which is like when [TS]

00:37:58   I was a kid if you want to go to dennys [TS]

00:38:00   you would get in a car and drive to [TS]

00:38:01   dennys like why is there a 19 year old [TS]

00:38:03   kid who is driven to dennys in the [TS]

00:38:05   middle of the night [TS]

00:38:06   now if you wanna go in it go out and get [TS]

00:38:07   a kebab at four in the morning there's a [TS]

00:38:10   pretty good chance you could walk there [TS]

00:38:11   in 10-15 minutes huge difference it's [TS]

00:38:14   one reason i put up with so much horse [TS]

00:38:15   shit in this stupid town i live in is [TS]

00:38:17   because it is pretty walkable and pretty [TS]

00:38:19   you know public transit apple and and [TS]

00:38:21   given that I'm advancing in years and [TS]

00:38:23   and don't need to go out and in the [TS]

00:38:25   middle of the night is actually make [TS]

00:38:26   school drop off the next morning kind of [TS]

00:38:28   hard [TS]

00:38:28   still I i like that that's I like the e [TS]

00:38:31   I can walk places i don't like having to [TS]

00:38:33   get a car I I despise having to get in a [TS]

00:38:36   car to go somewhere and do a thing and [TS]

00:38:38   then drive back i did that for so many [TS]

00:38:41   years and it just became in Florida [TS]

00:38:43   that's what we did not touch this when [TS]

00:38:45   we want to go buy records with try to [TS]

00:38:46   tampa florida to my records we have to [TS]

00:38:49   drive 40 minutes to buy records and and [TS]

00:38:52   now like like today that seems I [TS]

00:38:55   understand why that's the way it is but [TS]

00:38:58   it's kind of a bummer [TS]

00:39:00   yeah well and and you're talking about [TS]

00:39:03   my life now because because as I've said [TS]

00:39:05   before like the one thing that I the one [TS]

00:39:08   thing that I failed to take into [TS]

00:39:09   consideration when I bought my house was [TS]

00:39:11   that I would have to drive a night then [TS]

00:39:12   that i did not like [TS]

00:39:14   I love to drive for sport [TS]

00:39:18   I hate to drive out of necessity [TS]

00:39:21   same thing here yeah and you really [TS]

00:39:23   there's I don't want to provide [TS]

00:39:26   triangulation oh that's all right they [TS]

00:39:28   all know where I live big together [TS]

00:39:29   putting supertrain stickers on all my [TS]

00:39:31   stop signs now creepy is that there's [TS]

00:39:34   that one weird little shop near you [TS]

00:39:36   which is useless you totally useless [TS]

00:39:38   they don't have half and half [TS]

00:39:40   you don't happen to have all this extra [TS]

00:39:41   correctly you would cool do I get [TS]

00:39:44   lottery tickets do i remember correctly [TS]

00:39:47   they didn't know what half and half was [TS]

00:39:48   we never heard of it [TS]

00:39:49   never heard of it wasn't interested in [TS]

00:39:51   learning about it was like it comes out [TS]

00:39:53   of a cow but you know you're a good [TS]

00:39:55   driver you like to drive and you're not [TS]

00:39:56   drinking and stuff so you going like I [TS]

00:39:58   love to drive but the problem is that [TS]

00:40:00   the problem is everybody wants to have a [TS]

00:40:02   fucking meeting and they all want to [TS]

00:40:03   have fucking meetings on the other side [TS]

00:40:05   of town so i'm always have a day that is [TS]

00:40:08   a half day just like you had that you [TS]

00:40:10   have to have a meeting I don't have a [TS]

00:40:11   meeting I just send me the just send me [TS]

00:40:14   the the liner notes in the PowerPoint [TS]

00:40:16   yeah like what what what are we talking [TS]

00:40:18   about here is there something I can say [TS]

00:40:20   yes or no to but no it's a it's a it's a [TS]

00:40:23   freaking meeting you gotta be there and [TS]

00:40:25   so I'm in the car and-and-and and the [TS]

00:40:27   traffic is so capricious like 1130 on a [TS]

00:40:31   wednesday it takes me five minutes to [TS]

00:40:33   get to town 1130 the next day honor [TS]

00:40:36   absolutely same conditions and it's [TS]

00:40:38   stop-and-go traffic for an hour [TS]

00:40:40   that makes me insane it's just crazy [TS]

00:40:42   making and and so I so I look at my eye [TS]

00:40:44   look at my house and I'm like I want to [TS]

00:40:45   live here i want to fix this house up I [TS]

00:40:47   want to I can see myself living here for [TS]

00:40:49   20 years it's a it's a my mortgage [TS]

00:40:52   payment is inexpensive have a lot of [TS]

00:40:54   property i got room to grow [TS]

00:40:56   I got plenty of room here i can ever i [TS]

00:40:58   can have a room just to practice the [TS]

00:40:59   viola as John Hodgman describes his his [TS]

00:41:03   his childhood home he said there was a [TS]

00:41:05   room in my house where they all purpose [TS]

00:41:07   of the room was for me to practice the [TS]

00:41:08   old [TS]

00:41:09   and an idea and i like that i admire [TS]

00:41:11   that of the old practice room so but I [TS]

00:41:14   am consigning myself to this drive this [TS]

00:41:18   this drive or to being like a like a [TS]

00:41:22   weird hermit the internet does not [TS]

00:41:24   provide me i cannot be a person who just [TS]

00:41:27   sits and looks on the internet I just [TS]

00:41:28   can't do it [TS]

00:41:29   you sure about that doesn't include your [TS]

00:41:32   phone [TS]

00:41:33   happy well fucking see you you act like [TS]

00:41:36   you're some cat lady sitting there with [TS]

00:41:38   your pc but you to a lot did I i I've [TS]

00:41:44   been having have been having some very [TS]

00:41:45   strong feelings lately Merlin empty that [TS]

00:41:47   the internet in particular the internet [TS]

00:41:51   that I let live in which is the Twitter [TS]

00:41:54   net and that expanded kind of into the [TS]

00:41:57   Instagram met with a with like a Hail [TS]

00:42:01   Mary pass once a week to the Facebook [TS]

00:42:03   net that this world is now greatly [TS]

00:42:08   diminished from what it was a year ago [TS]

00:42:11   and I know that you be an early adopter [TS]

00:42:14   of all these technologies have already [TS]

00:42:16   felt sympathetic I've already felt the [TS]

00:42:19   great sorrow of help much worse it is [TS]

00:42:21   that it was but you know i am i am one [TS]

00:42:25   of those people who actually has a [TS]

00:42:26   career that he is like I'm trying to [TS]

00:42:29   provide as you know top-shelf free [TS]

00:42:32   content yet I I would never do that but [TS]

00:42:35   but i'm also trying to like the twitter [TS]

00:42:41   is the only way I have to tell people [TS]

00:42:43   that I'm playing a show and playing a [TS]

00:42:45   show is the only way I have to connect [TS]

00:42:47   with people outside of Twitter and I've [TS]

00:42:51   noticed just recently like I'm trying to [TS]

00:42:54   promote things and facebook has put up [TS]

00:42:58   all those firewalls where your posts no [TS]

00:43:00   longer go to your friends here I've [TS]

00:43:02   heard about this it sounds really weird [TS]

00:43:04   it's the worst it's just like oh you [TS]

00:43:06   have you have 5,000 friends and when [TS]

00:43:09   using like five people could look at a [TS]

00:43:11   page and see different things [TS]

00:43:13   well what happens is you know their [TS]

00:43:14   timeline is going by and Facebook used [TS]

00:43:18   to put my little tweets [TS]

00:43:21   in the timeline of everybody that [TS]

00:43:23   follows me everybody that friends me or [TS]

00:43:27   whatever but then Facebook realized [TS]

00:43:29   people like me were promoting their [TS]

00:43:31   shows by sending out facebook i mean not [TS]

00:43:35   not like private messages or anything [TS]

00:43:37   but but just just tweeting about it or [TS]

00:43:39   just facebooking about it and now [TS]

00:43:41   Facebook takes like seventy percent of [TS]

00:43:46   your friends [TS]

00:43:48   it just doesn't show them all your posts [TS]

00:43:49   it yeah how does it decide it just [TS]

00:43:54   randomly decides and it says if you want [TS]

00:43:58   all your posts to go to all your friends [TS]

00:44:01   it costs you Mandy nine dollars are you [TS]

00:44:04   kidding me i'm not kidding is sel this [TS]

00:44:06   is how they're trying to make money play [TS]

00:44:08   and so I started missing out on the head [TS]

00:44:11   I know so I here for people all the time [TS]

00:44:12   that somebody take care of me the other [TS]

00:44:14   day they were like I used to love your [TS]

00:44:15   facebook posts why did you stop and I [TS]

00:44:19   said I didn't stop facebook just stopped [TS]

00:44:21   showing them to you the pictures got [TS]

00:44:22   small and they're like really huh don't [TS]

00:44:26   think that's the thing nobody knows [TS]

00:44:27   about it so so but i'm noticing like I [TS]

00:44:30   send out a thing that used to generate a [TS]

00:44:34   lot of interest and I used to feel like [TS]

00:44:37   oh the internet is a comfortable place [TS]

00:44:39   for me now i have transitioned away from [TS]

00:44:41   needing magazines to write about my band [TS]

00:44:45   i can just write about my own band and [TS]

00:44:47   and promote myself but in the [TS]

00:44:51   intervening 45 years since I've been on [TS]

00:44:54   Twitter everybody in the world [TS]

00:44:57   he's trying to promote their cat videos [TS]

00:45:00   and no one has any attention span for [TS]

00:45:03   nobody has any nobody I mean nobody goes [TS]

00:45:06   and reads their twitter feed anymore [TS]

00:45:07   your facebook feed is all gamed and i'm [TS]

00:45:13   and and I no longer feel like I am [TS]

00:45:15   effectively communicating with people [TS]

00:45:17   that want to find ya people that are [TS]

00:45:19   listening to our podcast are doing it [TS]

00:45:22   because they are they have drank the [TS]

00:45:24   kool-aid they are ruined forever and [TS]

00:45:28   like they just sit pulling on their [TS]

00:45:31   fingers and waiting for more information [TS]

00:45:36   but the but the majority of Michael [TS]

00:45:39   never i never thought of it that way but [TS]

00:45:41   the majority of people out there that [TS]

00:45:44   i'm trying to reach that are just like [TS]

00:45:45   normal ticket buyers and people that [TS]

00:45:48   have not yet but the people that it's [TS]

00:45:50   like tasted smelled the kool-aid but [TS]

00:45:52   haven't had a taste of it yet [TS]

00:45:53   like those people at it's just getting [TS]

00:45:55   lost in the adjust the people i follow [TS]

00:45:58   I mean just adjust pollen storms [TS]

00:46:02   kickstarters are taking up [TS]

00:46:05   three-quarters of my twitter feed [TS]

00:46:07   like people are everybody everybody [TS]

00:46:11   wants your attention everybody is asking [TS]

00:46:13   for money everybody is making a new [TS]

00:46:15   thing that they're very excited about [TS]

00:46:17   and there is no distinction between me [TS]

00:46:22   who makes things professionally and the [TS]

00:46:27   guy next door who makes things to keep [TS]

00:46:29   the demon dogs from from filling his [TS]

00:46:32   head with screaming and howling and his [TS]

00:46:36   promoted the MVP is nine dollars to [TS]

00:46:38   facebook everybody sees his post so i [TS]

00:46:41   put so anyway I'm feeling like oh the [TS]

00:46:43   internet it's it has legitimately moved [TS]

00:46:45   on from i mean i remember when i joined [TS]

00:46:47   twitter you and your olds cadres were [TS]

00:46:50   already like Twitter's dead brother's [TS]

00:46:52   dead it used to be so great but now I [TS]

00:46:55   really do feel like there is no what [TS]

00:46:59   what seemed like you could run an [TS]

00:47:02   economy you could run a business this [TS]

00:47:03   way [TS]

00:47:04   it's all gone it'sit's ebbing and I [TS]

00:47:08   don't know what the next thing that are [TS]

00:47:10   do we go back to blogging yeah do I [TS]

00:47:12   design an app could do I design at doing [TS]

00:47:16   the design an app that every time I fart [TS]

00:47:18   in a glass it goes onto your phone it's [TS]

00:47:21   pretty good it's a lot of farming [TS]

00:47:23   because she's somebody prototype that [TS]

00:47:25   our class but the FR t GLS up our class [TS]

00:47:32   that coo i'll get too lonely sandwich [TS]

00:47:35   should do a promotional video [TS]

00:47:37   good luck is busy i well I have a lot of [TS]

00:47:40   thoughts on this [TS]

00:47:41   yes none of them are interesting but [TS]

00:47:44   i'll give you a couple cookies [TS]

00:47:45   well i mean well first of all it's funny [TS]

00:47:47   that like you would like look at that [TS]

00:47:49   cat video guy and now like you know you [TS]

00:47:52   like and hey like I'm John Roderick and [TS]

00:47:54   like I actually make stuff well it's [TS]

00:47:56   funny because like five or eight years [TS]

00:47:58   ago you know you were the underdog [TS]

00:48:01   uh-huh whereas you know there's the big [TS]

00:48:02   companies out there that are like buying [TS]

00:48:04   the ads and in rolling stone and there [TS]

00:48:07   was these all these bands during the [TS]

00:48:09   skunkworks thing and they were the [TS]

00:48:11   underdogs but it's funny to me today [TS]

00:48:13   a you know relatively successful [TS]

00:48:17   independent artist could look at the cat [TS]

00:48:20   video people and see like a you're [TS]

00:48:21   eating up my plate like what's let's [TS]

00:48:23   look at this you're not you're not not [TS]

00:48:27   releasing records what you doing how [TS]

00:48:30   dare you [TS]

00:48:30   hey listen if I'm going to sustain this [TS]

00:48:33   not releasing records career i mean it [TS]

00:48:35   all the bandwidth i can get also i would [TS]

00:48:38   just like to say it is completely insane [TS]

00:48:40   to use a service that doesn't do what [TS]

00:48:43   you expected like Facebook I don't [TS]

00:48:46   interface because who cares but you know [TS]

00:48:48   eventually you will all not care as much [TS]

00:48:50   as I don't care and you'll be so much [TS]

00:48:52   happier but you know it just seems so [TS]

00:48:54   weird to me like it seems like Facebook [TS]

00:48:56   is predicated on this weird shell game [TS]

00:48:58   about expectations [TS]

00:49:00   it seems strange to me that you would [TS]

00:49:01   like regardless of whatever their model [TS]

00:49:03   is that you would post stuff that would [TS]

00:49:05   appear somewhere like that you need [TS]

00:49:07   don't know which or win that's so that [TS]

00:49:09   sounds like the definition of madness to [TS]

00:49:11   me this is what's confusing i guess [TS]

00:49:12   what's confusing is that I had a brief [TS]

00:49:14   moment there where being pithy [TS]

00:49:17   with no expectations generated interest [TS]

00:49:23   created and all right there was an [TS]

00:49:24   audience for it and I was like well [TS]

00:49:27   that's all you you and I and all of our [TS]

00:49:29   friends have ever wanted is like can we [TS]

00:49:32   get paid to just hang out and have to [TS]

00:49:35   hang out in a Chinese restaurant and and [TS]

00:49:37   and and just talk funny about uh about [TS]

00:49:41   rock'n'roll isn't that it isn't a dream [TS]

00:49:44   job though it's all we ever wanted and [TS]

00:49:46   there was a brief moment there where [TS]

00:49:47   like we were basically all hang out in [TS]

00:49:49   chinese restaurant talking about [TS]

00:49:50   rock'n'roll and it generated an audience [TS]

00:49:52   and 404 and I was stupid enough to think [TS]

00:49:55   like this is this will last and so now [TS]

00:50:00   I'm yeah I'm back into the like oh shit [TS]

00:50:02   i'm going to make something I gotta make [TS]

00:50:03   something that like that I gotta make [TS]

00:50:05   something that's bit that that rises up [TS]

00:50:07   above the din so I mean I'm sympathetic [TS]

00:50:10   sign you know I hate to admit it but I [TS]

00:50:12   feel the same way I I don't check in on [TS]

00:50:16   my twitter timeline like I used to now i [TS]

00:50:18   will kind of guy I am like beyond okay [TS]

00:50:22   to just let the whole thing go by and [TS]

00:50:24   I'll pop in a couple times a week and go [TS]

00:50:26   home clean favorite favorite that let [TS]

00:50:29   you know and like oh that's funny re 22 [TS]

00:50:31   or whatever down the a no longer you [TS]

00:50:34   know if I'm going to San Francisco all i [TS]

00:50:36   do is i tweet i'm going to San Francisco [TS]

00:50:37   see you guys there with the assumption [TS]

00:50:40   that all my friends are watching my [TS]

00:50:43   Twitter to see what i'm doing and then [TS]

00:50:46   when i get to san francisco my choirs [TS]

00:50:48   everybody and then I realize oh nobody [TS]

00:50:52   is watching Twitter anymore nobody is [TS]

00:50:54   nobody and and i don't i have not either [TS]

00:50:57   gone back to actually texting emailing [TS]

00:50:59   my actual friends or figured out a new [TS]

00:51:02   way to me that was what Twitter was [TS]

00:51:04   originally designed to do right so good [TS]

00:51:07   yeah I'm I'm there's anything that [TS]

00:51:09   Twitter was for that was kind of it i'm [TS]

00:51:11   at this bar tonight you know and all [TS]

00:51:14   your friends would see it right and that [TS]

00:51:16   gets me the second point which is a can [TS]

00:51:20   be frustrating because it's more of a [TS]

00:51:22   story statement of the problem but [TS]

00:51:25   when my mom bought a house we were when [TS]

00:51:31   i was ten and she did something that was [TS]

00:51:33   really really strange my mom and [TS]

00:51:36   immediately but it's all the dirty [TS]

00:51:39   thoughts were inside she she did [TS]

00:51:41   something that was very strange by my [TS]

00:51:42   mom standards we know we had a very we [TS]

00:51:44   didn't have a lot of dough but she did [TS]

00:51:46   one of those weird single mom things [TS]

00:51:48   that still seems really strange but and [TS]

00:51:52   yet very interesting which was that like [TS]

00:51:54   we didn't even have we don't have a [TS]

00:51:56   touch-tone phone but we had an office [TS]

00:51:59   phone like a business phone in our [TS]

00:52:01   kitchen so on the wall in our kitchen we [TS]

00:52:04   had a phone and it had a whole button [TS]

00:52:08   and it had you know what you think about [TS]

00:52:11   this remember those old phones we get [TS]

00:52:13   the one left to get the hold button and [TS]

00:52:15   then you get the first line second line [TS]

00:52:16   and so on the room and member of lines [TS]

00:52:18   hold line is the hold button is red and [TS]

00:52:21   yeah exactly and I wasn't white [TS]

00:52:23   yeah in in 1976 we had a home line and a [TS]

00:52:30   business line which is like like you [TS]

00:52:32   could see somebody like fancy having [TS]

00:52:34   that but this is our [TS]

00:52:35   twenty-thousand-dollar house and [TS]

00:52:36   Cincinnati my mom had this she had a [TS]

00:52:38   personal line and a business line and it [TS]

00:52:42   was such an interesting idea because you [TS]

00:52:44   know for her real estate business if [TS]

00:52:45   anybody needed to call her losses of [TS]

00:52:47   course years and years before mobile [TS]

00:52:49   phones [TS]

00:52:50   what they call her that she had her work [TS]

00:52:52   number and she had this like home [TS]

00:52:54   business number and they were very [TS]

00:52:56   different rules i was never ever to use [TS]

00:52:59   that the business line for stuff because [TS]

00:53:01   that's not what it was for you and your [TS]

00:53:03   kind of like that that seems so exotic [TS]

00:53:06   to me like you think about being think [TS]

00:53:08   about how you are when you're 10 years [TS]

00:53:09   old and the idea of like having the [TS]

00:53:11   phone in your kitchen have a whole [TS]

00:53:12   button nobody had that when we were kids [TS]

00:53:14   absolutely unheard of [TS]

00:53:17   and the problem is like your twitter is [TS]

00:53:19   like eight different doesn't have a [TS]

00:53:21   whole button it but it does have like it [TS]

00:53:25   should have numerous white buttons but [TS]

00:53:27   it's really just one big white button so [TS]

00:53:29   yeah using right you're using it to talk [TS]

00:53:31   to your friends you're using it to be [TS]

00:53:33   funny to strangers [TS]

00:53:34   you're using it to promote your business [TS]

00:53:37   you are using it to talk about politics [TS]

00:53:40   and sometimes you're using it to bitch [TS]

00:53:42   about how the door on the plane just [TS]

00:53:44   closed and you know all the people who [TS]

00:53:47   follow you are seeing theoretically all [TS]

00:53:49   of those and so you know part of what [TS]

00:53:52   made it so great was it well it is so [TS]

00:53:54   simple i mean the rules of Twitter are [TS]

00:53:56   just wonderfully simple but I think [TS]

00:53:59   you're running up against what a lot of [TS]

00:54:00   people don't run up against look how do [TS]

00:54:01   you how can you be a real person on [TS]

00:54:03   there with just that one big white [TS]

00:54:06   button but that that integration of all [TS]

00:54:09   those different realms was was the [TS]

00:54:11   primary revolution for me because before [TS]

00:54:15   that you know the challenge I always [TS]

00:54:18   felt was my songs are a place the where [TS]

00:54:22   I'm where I'm very passionate and I [TS]

00:54:24   write about my feelings and I read about [TS]

00:54:26   girls and I read about being [TS]

00:54:28   disappointed and I write about being you [TS]

00:54:33   know lonely and scared they are not [TS]

00:54:35   especially funny songs they aren't [TS]

00:54:38   especially they're not political songs [TS]

00:54:40   they aren't you know that and and I [TS]

00:54:44   always felt like when my songs were my [TS]

00:54:46   only ambassador to the world that I had [TS]

00:54:51   all this other pent-up energy and desire [TS]

00:54:55   to be understood and unlike a lot of my [TS]

00:54:59   peers I mean a lot of the guys I know [TS]

00:55:01   just like I don't like doing interviews [TS]

00:55:02   LOL the song speak from you know the [TS]

00:55:04   songs will speak for themselves and I [TS]

00:55:07   was absolutely opposite i was like [TS]

00:55:09   please give me an interview so i can [TS]

00:55:11   contextualize this music in a in the [TS]

00:55:13   larger picture of like how I see the [TS]

00:55:16   world and Twitter was the first time I [TS]

00:55:20   had I had access to people who were [TS]

00:55:24   interested in my songs and wanted to [TS]

00:55:26   know more [TS]

00:55:27   where I could just speak directly across [TS]

00:55:30   80 and and yes get into fights with [TS]

00:55:33   hilton hotels and yes talk about things [TS]

00:55:36   late at night and make jokes you know [TS]

00:55:40   and and that integration that one button [TS]

00:55:43   was like I felt like Oh finally I didn't [TS]

00:55:48   want I didn't want my songs to be this [TS]

00:55:51   separate realm because everytime [TS]

00:55:55   everytime i would read a review about my [TS]

00:55:57   music where they're like well this guy [TS]

00:55:58   obviously doesn't know how words work [TS]

00:56:00   he's his music is just you know he's [TS]

00:56:03   just throwing random words and a a [TS]

00:56:05   dartboard [TS]

00:56:06   I was like you fucking idiot how can use [TS]

00:56:09   I mean how could you listen to my music [TS]

00:56:11   and think that and ever since twitter i [TS]

00:56:15   have felt very confident that even a [TS]

00:56:17   cursory search if you are interested in [TS]

00:56:20   the long winters a cursory search will [TS]

00:56:22   will deliver a person to a place where [TS]

00:56:26   the whole spectrum is at least available [TS]

00:56:30   to see and the idea that that I would [TS]

00:56:34   have to start cutting that up again and [TS]

00:56:37   say like because you know i own at the [TS]

00:56:40   long winters and at long winters I have [TS]

00:56:44   those Twitter accounts and I've never [TS]

00:56:46   used either one of them I wanted them so [TS]

00:56:48   nobody else would take them but I didn't [TS]

00:56:50   want to have a band account that was [TS]

00:56:52   just like coming to your town [TS]

00:56:54   well is that there's a there's like that [TS]

00:56:55   let's be honest it's a there's a [TS]

00:56:57   strategic reason for not doing that you [TS]

00:56:59   you rather your good friend mr. Hodgman [TS]

00:57:02   about wanting to convert his Twitter [TS]

00:57:06   following into a tumblr following yeah [TS]

00:57:08   but that that Nina which when you when [TS]

00:57:11   you're as likely that's what you're [TS]

00:57:12   talking about here is like I i have like [TS]

00:57:14   probably 15 different twitter handles [TS]

00:57:17   for different things but there's not [TS]

00:57:19   much point to it because for whatever [TS]

00:57:20   inexplicable reason fake hotdogs ladies [TS]

00:57:24   oh I'm a lot of my fake Merlin I'm nice [TS]

00:57:27   Merlin I don't think I'm fake hotdogs [TS]

00:57:30   ladies if it's not funny it's not me [TS]

00:57:32   okay all minor funny yeah and not [TS]

00:57:34   updated as you do but I but you know I [TS]

00:57:38   could do that but you know that the the [TS]

00:57:42   percentage of people who would go and [TS]

00:57:45   follow that particular thing would be [TS]

00:57:48   far less than 1% of the following that I [TS]

00:57:51   get with this this one that's already [TS]

00:57:53   been sort of established or whatever and [TS]

00:57:55   so I mean there's a business reason for [TS]

00:57:56   not doing that but also everything you [TS]

00:57:57   described right there that would work [TS]

00:57:59   not to get all malcolm gladwell that [TS]

00:58:02   would work up to 250 or 200 people maybe [TS]

00:58:06   500 people depending on how active they [TS]

00:58:09   were but after that point you have you [TS]

00:58:12   mean I know you know this but you have [TS]

00:58:13   to remember that everything you say on [TS]

00:58:17   there regardless of which mask you're [TS]

00:58:19   wearing at the time or which persona [TS]

00:58:21   you're speaking in norwich business [TS]

00:58:24   you're speaking in service of you know [TS]

00:58:25   that the person who follows you like the [TS]

00:58:27   extremely small number of people who [TS]

00:58:29   follow you because of your politics is [TS]

00:58:32   I'm super sorry for now for now but I [TS]

00:58:36   mean all the people who would follow [TS]

00:58:38   along because of some squirrely [TS]

00:58:40   political belief you have could care [TS]

00:58:42   less about whether you can't take care [TS]

00:58:48   less who you're playing with tonight [TS]

00:58:50   yeah i mean like why are you talking [TS]

00:58:51   more about this thing that I like you [TS]

00:58:53   know that's the problem is that like it [TS]

00:58:55   but we will act surprised when that [TS]

00:58:57   happens well it's like we deliberately [TS]

00:58:59   you know created this one place we could [TS]

00:59:01   find out all of these things but then we [TS]

00:59:03   seem really confused that people want [TS]

00:59:05   different things out of it and write its [TS]

00:59:08   i agree with you it's just that it got [TS]

00:59:09   big and like we had the curse of this [TS]

00:59:12   thing becoming bigger than we expected [TS]

00:59:13   and then it didn't so I mean like I [TS]

00:59:15   personally I've made my peace with that [TS]

00:59:17   like to me it's just a funny joke [TS]

00:59:18   platform it's likely place for like I [TS]

00:59:20   talked about too many intricate details [TS]

00:59:22   of my life because it doesn't scale [TS]

00:59:23   right but you are developing a new [TS]

00:59:27   platform somewhere where you can talk [TS]

00:59:29   about comic books I i hear the rumble [TS]

00:59:31   and line I hear the rumblings in the [TS]

00:59:33   streets [TS]

00:59:34   I i know that you cannot continue to not [TS]

00:59:37   have a place to talk about comic books [TS]

00:59:38   platform i caught a bus stop and so I [TS]

00:59:43   mean you're absolutely right i would not [TS]

00:59:45   the only reason the only built there are [TS]

00:59:49   only five people in the world that [TS]

00:59:50   really want to hear every single thing I [TS]

00:59:52   say until they were you what tumor me [TS]

00:59:55   one of them is my mom and then two other [TS]

00:59:58   you know and then two stalkers [TS]

00:59:58   you know and then two stalkers [TS]

01:00:00   but uh Ben and I know that because like [TS]

01:00:05   I follow a lot of my friends and and [TS]

01:00:08   there and every one of them has a place [TS]

01:00:10   in their in their core interests where I [TS]

01:00:15   go oh my god not this again but at the [TS]

01:00:21   same time like I that desire to be a to [TS]

01:00:24   be an integrated person and to take your [TS]

01:00:28   to take your party to the world like I [TS]

01:00:33   mean and at i guess that i guess the [TS]

01:00:36   reason that television or or radio or [TS]

01:00:39   books or I'll have any media is is such [TS]

01:00:44   a narrow aperture is that the love of [TS]

01:00:47   God nobody wants to have everything from [TS]

01:00:51   from any one person if that I guess a [TS]

01:00:54   novel or aura like journal writing would [TS]

01:00:59   be the closest would be the most the [TS]

01:01:03   closest you could get but you know but [TS]

01:01:05   you might love love named Norman [TS]

01:01:08   Mailer's books but you don't want to [TS]

01:01:09   like be with him like Hitler's paintings [TS]

01:01:12   but I don't want his recipes Hitler's [TS]

01:01:16   paintings did I tell you that I went [TS]

01:01:17   through a phase where I thought maybe I [TS]

01:01:18   was gonna buy a Hitler painting how I'd [TS]

01:01:21   love to hear about that I i realized [TS]

01:01:24   that you can go online it's a dark dark [TS]

01:01:27   corner of the internet but there is a [TS]

01:01:29   dealer that specializes in Hitler [TS]

01:01:32   watercolors and they're not they're not [TS]

01:01:35   his best work all of all of Hitler's [TS]

01:01:39   great you know like big full-size [TS]

01:01:41   canvases i'll probably probably [TS]

01:01:43   destroyed him [TS]

01:01:44   no no no they are they are held in [TS]

01:01:47   private collections through they are [TS]

01:01:50   really surprised the Allies would let [TS]

01:01:52   those live well this is the thing that [TS]

01:01:54   they are i mean there is this [TS]

01:01:57   there is this world of people that [TS]

01:01:59   collect fucked up shit and Hitler [TS]

01:02:02   paintings is one of those things where [TS]

01:02:04   you don't publicize it it's not a thing [TS]

01:02:07   that you can really be above ground [TS]

01:02:09   about [TS]

01:02:09   but there are people that have big [TS]

01:02:12   Hitler paintings on the wall and their [TS]

01:02:13   value is at least right now their value [TS]

01:02:21   is still very curious and you know what [TS]

01:02:23   I mean like it isn't it's still not okay [TS]

01:02:25   to have a Hitler painting now maybe a [TS]

01:02:27   hundred years like I mean Jane Mansfield [TS]

01:02:28   scarf or something it's something or you [TS]

01:02:31   know at games car the our worst like [TS]

01:02:33   owning jayne mansfield's tooth you know [TS]

01:02:36   where it's like what how did you get [TS]

01:02:38   that oh well I kind of can't talk about [TS]

01:02:40   it but it's you know like here's jayne [TS]

01:02:43   mansfield's tooth because during her [TS]

01:02:46   autopsy like some unscrupulous doctor [TS]

01:02:49   pulled it and sold it to a guy like I [TS]

01:02:52   hit but a Hitler Hitler painting and I [TS]

01:02:56   and I believe that there will come a [TS]

01:02:57   time when when when those are I mean [TS]

01:03:01   because like a painting by Napoleon or [TS]

01:03:07   even a painting by tom who's like a who [TS]

01:03:12   is a dastardly person from history [TS]

01:03:14   that's been dead long john wayne gacy [TS]

01:03:16   well but even Gacy paintings like that [TS]

01:03:19   you can utilize that was an industry he [TS]

01:03:22   did and the people that own Gacy [TS]

01:03:24   paintings are a particular type of [TS]

01:03:26   roller derby boyfriend know that makes [TS]

01:03:36   you have but that's like the this those [TS]

01:03:43   people have although the research you [TS]

01:03:46   know modern primitive books on their [TS]

01:03:48   shows and Danny and they think that [TS]

01:03:50   their that they're edgy better like a [TS]

01:03:52   Hitler painting [TS]

01:03:53   first of all is a is a more expensive [TS]

01:03:55   proposition and also you know a pretty [TS]

01:03:58   ugly thing in the sense that even if [TS]

01:04:01   it's a a watercolor of a stream running [TS]

01:04:03   through a forest every time you look at [TS]

01:04:07   it you have to say why do I have that [TS]

01:04:09   oh that's right it was he was I wasn't [TS]

01:04:12   that good right [TS]

01:04:13   Hitler I mean easy easy he is he's a [TS]

01:04:16   better painter than half the paintings [TS]

01:04:18   that are on the wall of my house that I [TS]

01:04:20   bought at the store five dollars which [TS]

01:04:22   AC then by a hit [TS]

01:04:23   no Jason likes modern art and Hitler is [TS]

01:04:27   you know it's like pretty pretty art [TS]

01:04:30   school watercolors pastoral yeah right [TS]

01:04:33   or you know or he was really good at [TS]

01:04:35   architecture he was really bad at figure [TS]

01:04:37   drawing so so he painted a lot of [TS]

01:04:40   buildings huh boy that's ironic and miss [TS]

01:04:44   the video do you think about that really [TS]

01:04:46   is and i would love I would love a [TS]

01:04:48   catalog he got he got the idea of a [TS]

01:04:51   good-looking Berlin but he just couldn't [TS]

01:04:52   get people i would love I without my god [TS]

01:04:56   hang on a second long bell [TS]

01:05:04   I he I would love a catalog of all the [TS]

01:05:07   buildings in munich and vienna that [TS]

01:05:10   Hitler painted that were destroyed in [TS]

01:05:12   the war [TS]

01:05:13   Wow much better than I thought well see [TS]

01:05:16   wow so so happy its perspectives pretty [TS]

01:05:18   good and the problem that you know what [TS]

01:05:21   they say is if Hitler it if you could go [TS]

01:05:23   back in time all you do it all you would [TS]

01:05:25   do is go tell her what a good painter he [TS]

01:05:26   was and and and avert the war that his [TS]

01:05:30   father was getting her she was you know [TS]

01:05:33   Hitler was was criticized by his harsh [TS]

01:05:35   art school teachers who said even never [TS]

01:05:38   to be a good pages it's not good [TS]

01:05:41   this is terrible but in fact he did she [TS]

01:05:43   he should have just set up a easel in [TS]

01:05:46   like this [TS]

01:05:47   the with the German version of [TS]

01:05:49   fisherman's wharf [TS]

01:05:50   yeah exactly the last week the students [TS]

01:05:52   works and and sad and painted painted [TS]

01:05:56   buildings and watercolors all day he was [TS]

01:05:58   fine but in any case I I there was a [TS]

01:06:00   period there where I had you know a [TS]

01:06:02   little extra money lying around and I [TS]

01:06:03   was like you know what I'm gonna do I'm [TS]

01:06:04   gonna buy a painting by Hitler and [TS]

01:06:08   then i got for your moments of reports [TS]

01:06:11   then I put up i put in square on the [TS]

01:06:14   wall and I was like okay that's your [TS]

01:06:17   Hitler painting now every time you walk [TS]

01:06:19   past there and you look at that and you [TS]

01:06:21   think that's a Hitler painting [TS]

01:06:23   how do you feel yeah and i walked i [TS]

01:06:25   walked by and I looked at this square on [TS]

01:06:27   the wall for a couple of weeks and every [TS]

01:06:29   time I looked at it I was like what [TS]

01:06:30   because that's where all that's my hip [TS]

01:06:32   my painting Oh Hitler painting that's my [TS]

01:06:35   it looks like that's not cool that's not [TS]

01:06:38   cool dude to Hitler painting ladies [TS]

01:06:40   people are going to be creeped out like [TS]

01:06:42   yeah there's going to be a girl that [TS]

01:06:43   comes over and she's like the problem [TS]

01:06:45   with Hitler painting is you don't have [TS]

01:06:46   it and then keep it a secret is that the [TS]

01:06:49   whole point a girl comes over she's like [TS]

01:06:51   oh what's this painting and you go [TS]

01:06:52   that's my hands are paining well [TS]

01:06:54   actually that's by adults Hitler and [TS]

01:06:57   then she's going to get her coat and [TS]

01:06:59   she's gonna walk out of the house [TS]

01:07:00   without another thing without another [TS]

01:07:02   word because that's fucked up here and [TS]

01:07:04   so I did not get a Hitler painting but I [TS]

01:07:07   really thought about it for awhile [TS]

01:07:08   because the because they're so fraught [TS]

01:07:13   like it's all in the painting you hit [TS]

01:07:17   there he was and he was like this is [TS]

01:07:19   what I'm going to do I'm going to be a [TS]

01:07:21   great one of these papers and then he [TS]

01:07:24   was not and then he then he killed [TS]

01:07:28   millions millions of people yeah and [TS]

01:07:31   destroyed all of Europe and so I don't [TS]

01:07:34   know it's like what I would i get a stop [TS]

01:07:36   I think I would i think i would be more [TS]

01:07:38   likely to have a stolen painting because [TS]

01:07:43   even though Stalin killed more people [TS]

01:07:46   who there's just a interview get to [TS]

01:07:52   speak at the sense of Stalin you don't [TS]

01:07:54   you don't get the Hitler stigma he's not [TS]

01:07:56   quite so Hilary style and I mean we [TS]

01:08:00   don't live in a world where Stalin's [TS]

01:08:02   crimes really touched us as much but you [TS]

01:08:06   know Stalin just seemed like he was [TS]

01:08:08   doing the best he could and when was a [TS]

01:08:12   paranoid sociopath like to see what that [TS]

01:08:16   guy in Turkmenistan like to see what he [TS]

01:08:18   could come up with remember him getting [TS]

01:08:19   all the months after his family and [TS]

01:08:21   sure that's still around he's not gone I [TS]

01:08:23   was healing power [TS]

01:08:24   yeah he keeps his bill he's building [TS]

01:08:26   like his own brazilian you know the [TS]

01:08:28   story of brasilia where they were like [TS]

01:08:29   we're going to build a modern capital [TS]

01:08:31   and we're going to put it out in the [TS]

01:08:32   middle of the jungle in a place where no [TS]

01:08:34   one should ever build the city and it's [TS]

01:08:37   going to be this amazing campus except [TS]

01:08:38   it's called a kind of thing you have you [TS]

01:08:40   ever seen pictures of the of the city of [TS]

01:08:42   Brazilian now I don't know [TS]

01:08:44   well brasilia is the capital of Brazil [TS]

01:08:46   and it was built out of whole cloth to [TS]

01:08:50   be like a representative of Brazil into [TS]

01:08:52   the future and it looks like EPCOT [TS]

01:08:54   Center know it looks like it looks like [TS]

01:08:56   the world's fair of 1939 but it's an [TS]

01:09:01   actual city where government work is [TS]

01:09:05   supposed to get done and the guy in [TS]

01:09:08   Turkmenistan is building like his [TS]

01:09:11   capital looks like it really looks like [TS]

01:09:15   the strip in las vegas there's a pyramid [TS]

01:09:17   there's an Eiffel Tower you know like [TS]

01:09:20   the the library is the official library [TS]

01:09:24   of turkmenistan is like a one quarter [TS]

01:09:27   sized moon it looks like a Shakey's [TS]

01:09:31   Pizza one quarter sized crystal moon [TS]

01:09:36   uh it's it's an insect it's just insane [TS]

01:09:39   and it's like it's like I don't know he [TS]

01:09:42   was still around he was real hot for a [TS]

01:09:43   while to remember you hear about I know [TS]

01:09:45   it's not the thing is I know it's not [TS]

01:09:46   joking i know he's actually also like a [TS]

01:09:48   horrible person it's not just be silly [TS]

01:09:50   but he's really really silly [TS]

01:09:53   am I right yeah yeah you like to do like [TS]

01:09:55   the like like beyond mouth like they [TS]

01:09:57   need you incredibly capricious things [TS]

01:09:58   with naming things and yeah he's bad and [TS]

01:10:01   he makes everybody in his country uh you [TS]

01:10:03   know like wear a hat on tuesdays is [TS]

01:10:06   shaped like a flower [TS]

01:10:08   I mean he sees these fully bonkers but [TS]

01:10:10   the thing the thing about a guy like [TS]

01:10:11   that and and and and his insanity and [TS]

01:10:14   probably the brutality that's just under [TS]

01:10:16   the surface is that we give such a pass [TS]

01:10:20   to Dubai they'll write the Emir's of a [TS]

01:10:27   of the Persian Gulf [TS]

01:10:29   I don't think they get the past that [TS]

01:10:30   they used to but yeah you're right but [TS]

01:10:32   you know like we are allowing [TS]

01:10:35   that we are we are globally allowing [TS]

01:10:37   that all that is a valid banking center [TS]

01:10:39   ony you is opening a campus they're [TS]

01:10:42   apparently the Louvre is opening a [TS]

01:10:46   branch Louvre in dubai there you know [TS]

01:10:51   like we are we are we are as a people as [TS]

01:10:54   a global people rewarding the insanity [TS]

01:10:58   of two x which is which is a nose [TS]

01:11:02   slightly more obviously liberal than [TS]

01:11:04   turkmenistan but just as bonkers [TS]

01:11:09   I mean that the capital programs and I'm [TS]

01:11:12   and I can only imagine like what the [TS]

01:11:13   immigrant workers are being treated like [TS]

01:11:15   they're so it's a it's another it's [TS]

01:11:18   another like kind of now we now we love [TS]

01:11:22   Saddam Hussein now we hate him now we [TS]

01:11:24   love a bin Laden now we hate him [TS]

01:11:28   it's like right now these these guys are [TS]

01:11:31   friends these these crazy desperate so I [TS]

01:11:33   have been so nice to be an [TS]

01:11:35   anti-communist lunatic in the sixties [TS]

01:11:38   and seventies Kiki imagine how much like [TS]

01:11:41   awesome free shit you could have gotten [TS]

01:11:42   think about how many lunatics we support [TS]

01:11:45   just because they were against communism [TS]

01:11:47   right yeah sure like like permanent [TS]

01:11:50   marker like if you were just vetting [TS]

01:11:52   sitting around whatever like setting the [TS]

01:11:53   Shah marcos any number of people in [TS]

01:11:58   Central American O'Shea my god [TS]

01:12:01   unbelievable but you gotta head that [TS]

01:12:03   could've really been in your wheelhouse [TS]

01:12:04   back then John that happened in America [TS]

01:12:06   to I know a guy who was a Soviet scholar [TS]

01:12:10   in the sixties seventies and eighties he [TS]

01:12:15   was a guy who told you the truth about [TS]

01:12:17   the TV the truth you didn't hear about [TS]

01:12:20   believing the Soviets were a threat was [TS]

01:12:27   going to mention a few months ago who [TS]

01:12:29   you talk to who told you that they have [TS]

01:12:31   people actually were convinced that the [TS]

01:12:33   Soviets were capable of more than yeah I [TS]

01:12:39   don't but I'm not sure that guy the guy [TS]

01:12:41   I'm talking about was a was a an [TS]

01:12:45   academic had a career that you took him [TS]

01:12:47   to the State Department [TS]

01:12:48   Ben and and he was a guy who I can I [TS]

01:12:54   mean I'm not embarrassed say should [TS]

01:12:57   never have been given an e-portfolio of [TS]

01:13:02   any kind [TS]

01:13:03   ok that's a different person because [TS]

01:13:05   this guy uh was a you know he was a [TS]

01:13:08   Soviet scholar and his entire [TS]

01:13:10   scholarship was based on his conviction [TS]

01:13:14   that the Soviets were godless heathens [TS]

01:13:17   and yet he had teaching positions in [TS]

01:13:20   major universities right and was sent [TS]

01:13:23   around the sound the around the world [TS]

01:13:26   including to the Soviet Union for a [TS]

01:13:29   years and learn to speak Russian and was [TS]

01:13:35   a person who was like like living and [TS]

01:13:41   studying the Soviets and yet never she [TS]

01:13:44   was never was shaken for a moment from [TS]

01:13:47   his complete conviction that they were [TS]

01:13:50   that there was a completely bankrupt [TS]

01:13:53   system and culture and people and you [TS]

01:13:58   know he was just a big and herb he was a [TS]

01:14:00   he was a paranoid bigot but because his [TS]

01:14:04   because in academia there was a there [TS]

01:14:08   was a need you know there were there [TS]

01:14:10   were there were all these people from [TS]

01:14:12   from Air America or whatever wandering [TS]

01:14:15   around berkeley campus in 1968 trying to [TS]

01:14:18   find one person that felt like the felt [TS]

01:14:21   like communism was bad and when that [TS]

01:14:23   person you know when some some bloody [TS]

01:14:27   showed up in a three-piece suit with a [TS]

01:14:28   pocket protector and said communism has [TS]

01:14:30   got left on our they were like giving an [TS]

01:14:32   immediate chairmanship and this guy had [TS]

01:14:36   an entire career and I mean you know [TS]

01:14:39   he's a nice enough guy but he should not [TS]

01:14:41   have ever he should have been on the [TS]

01:14:44   lunatic fringe but he but because he [TS]

01:14:49   chose academia and there was and i'm [TS]

01:14:51   absolutely sure and he he is blind to it [TS]

01:14:53   he is oblivious to the fact that his [TS]

01:14:56   entire career was a CIA [TS]

01:14:59   he was he did he was not actually [TS]

01:15:01   working for the CIA but they were they [TS]

01:15:05   had to have been the reason that he ever [TS]

01:15:07   got a job or was ever promoted the the [TS]

01:15:10   timing favored him [TS]

01:15:12   yeah well that the exactly like he was [TS]

01:15:14   he was the first man marcos of apparent [TS]

01:15:19   get it or whatever he was just using he [TS]

01:15:23   probably doesn't phrase it that way in [TS]

01:15:25   his resume know when he do anything he's [TS]

01:15:27   unaware of it he was a bad academic and [TS]

01:15:30   and and yet he continued to work and I'm [TS]

01:15:34   sure he was marginalized by his [TS]

01:15:36   colleagues but he continued to work [TS]

01:15:38   because a guy in a blue suit showed up [TS]

01:15:42   at the president of the university's [TS]

01:15:44   office and said right this guy has a lot [TS]

01:15:48   of interesting ideas and I really think [TS]

01:15:50   that you would benefit from giving him [TS]

01:15:52   this chaired position as he slides a [TS]

01:15:55   brown envelope across the desk [TS]

01:15:58   wow you know that had to be going on [TS]

01:16:01   everywhere and it and it you know it [TS]

01:16:03   goes on still it's basically the it's [TS]

01:16:05   the same idea as as as all these museums [TS]

01:16:11   devoted to intelligent design [TS]

01:16:14   we're teaching the controversy / brown [TS]

01:16:17   envelope across the desk is the question [TS]

01:16:20   of course so in the fullness of time [TS]

01:16:22   will you tell me you had that rectangle [TS]

01:16:26   on your wall and you realized I don't [TS]

01:16:28   want this to be my Hitler painting what [TS]

01:16:30   did you do with the space [TS]

01:16:31   did you feel something else usually the [TS]

01:16:34   blank and memory or but what did you do [TS]

01:16:36   well here's the here's my current [TS]

01:16:37   problem which is that I have a lot of [TS]

01:16:40   visual art that does not quite rise up [TS]

01:16:45   to the level of actual art like Jason [TS]

01:16:48   fins house as I've spoken about many [TS]

01:16:50   times and crystal Lewis house to that [TS]

01:16:52   that both of the both of my you know [TS]

01:16:54   main Bros in presence of the USA have [TS]

01:16:57   houses full of really cool art Jason's [TS]

01:17:00   house is mostly art paintings crystals [TS]

01:17:03   house is like really a a wonderfully [TS]

01:17:06   curated collection of like raw [TS]

01:17:10   arts you know and handicrafts and so [TS]

01:17:14   forth that are better like fantastic and [TS]

01:17:17   my house is really much more of a junk [TS]

01:17:19   pile of garbage all you know that I [TS]

01:17:23   would see but but but but honestly like [TS]

01:17:25   I'm sitting in my room right now here [TS]

01:17:27   I'm looking at a giant fabric a giant [TS]

01:17:31   flag that says both the Communist ax [TS]

01:17:33   that I tore down off of a balcony in [TS]

01:17:37   barcelona in 1989 and got chased through [TS]

01:17:41   the streets by the police and it is four [TS]

01:17:44   foot square and then I have a painting [TS]

01:17:49   an oil painting that an ex-girlfriend of [TS]

01:17:51   herself on paper and gave me at gunpoint [TS]

01:17:54   that I could never throw away because I [TS]

01:17:56   think it's wonderful i have a a poster [TS]

01:18:00   of nineteen seventies playmate taking [TS]

01:18:04   her shirt off in a in a wheat field and [TS]

01:18:08   that poster has been lacquered to a [TS]

01:18:11   board and then the edges of the board [TS]

01:18:14   are burned [TS]

01:18:16   oh I know that look I have a rope where [TS]

01:18:21   I have closed pinned a bunch of baseball [TS]

01:18:25   hats to the Rope that's my baseball hat [TS]

01:18:28   storage hack is it is if hang a rope and [TS]

01:18:32   then closed pending baseball hat stands [TS]

01:18:34   a good hack i have a Melvin's Nirvana [TS]

01:18:38   dwarves sterile expo stir I've got a [TS]

01:18:42   wonderful single of adriano celentano [TS]

01:18:46   knows prison colon and not i love that [TS]

01:18:49   so you turned me on to that that was [TS]

01:18:51   sent to me by a girl who listens to our [TS]

01:18:53   podcast no way off a girl in who lives [TS]

01:18:57   in Italy who found it or maybe she [TS]

01:19:00   ordered it from my god surround hell [TS]

01:19:02   yeah 45 [TS]

01:19:04   yeah I have a wind one of those like [TS]

01:19:09   wind [TS]

01:19:10   what the fuck is that called it's a it's [TS]

01:19:13   it's it goes up on top of a barn in vain [TS]

01:19:17   now when / weathervane but i will have a [TS]

01:19:19   weather vane [TS]

01:19:21   I have a rack of Varney sunglasses in [TS]

01:19:24   every different color like so none of [TS]

01:19:27   this is garbage to me i could sit and [TS]

01:19:28   talk about every one of these items but [TS]

01:19:31   they all taken together do not a form a [TS]

01:19:35   collection of any kind be none of them [TS]

01:19:39   and not no single one of them has any [TS]

01:19:41   intrinsic value and all its it's all [TS]

01:19:45   just crippled haha god and there's just [TS]

01:19:49   hard to listen to John there's not [TS]

01:19:51   enough space that she liked your [TS]

01:19:53   playboys over on like a big speaker is [TS]

01:19:55   very circles around a speaker okay [TS]

01:19:57   there there wouldn't be enough space in [TS]

01:19:58   a boeing aircraft hangar to put all of [TS]

01:20:01   it on the wall at once and and honestly [TS]

01:20:06   like I none of it actually broadcasts [TS]

01:20:09   any kind of aesthetic other than this [TS]

01:20:12   person has 24 different voices in his [TS]

01:20:14   head and all times popular be talking to [TS]

01:20:18   him in various accents and tell you to [TS]

01:20:20   do [TS]

01:20:21   oh I love my fans ha yr you're not [TS]

01:20:25   putting this on the world like i have [TS]

01:20:27   actually two without the record i have [TS]

01:20:30   two different i'm looking now across the [TS]

01:20:33   room i have two different frames picture [TS]

01:20:34   frames one of them has all of the coins [TS]

01:20:39   in circulation in 1941 in a picture [TS]

01:20:45   frame each one with a little hand typed [TS]

01:20:50   label underneath them saying 1941 [TS]

01:20:52   Liberty walking dollar 1941 mercury dime [TS]

01:20:56   that's in a picture frame and then I [TS]

01:20:59   have another picture frame but not a [TS]

01:21:03   matching picture frame but completely [TS]

01:21:05   said that the first one is like brushed [TS]

01:21:07   aluminum the second one is totally [TS]

01:21:09   baroque brass frame that has all of the [TS]

01:21:13   coins that my great uncle brought back [TS]

01:21:15   from the Merchant Marines when he was [TS]

01:21:18   when he went on his world tour in 1937 [TS]

01:21:22   now the coin in the coinage value of [TS]

01:21:27   those things is a thing that has value [TS]

01:21:28   you could take those to you could take [TS]

01:21:31   them out of the frames and take them and [TS]

01:21:33   sell them individually for the value of [TS]

01:21:34   their coins but as as displays yeah they [TS]

01:21:41   just say these are on the wall of the [TS]

01:21:44   house of a crazy person they say that [TS]

01:21:48   let's not decide so much as lessons haha [TS]

01:21:51   so so I don't know I'm trying I'm really [TS]

01:21:56   trying to get a handle that there's that [TS]

01:21:58   there's the old Alaska license plate [TS]

01:21:59   from my Vespa said yeah you're looking [TS]

01:22:02   for something that pulls it all together [TS]

01:22:03   like do you need a physical piece you [TS]

01:22:05   need like a sunday in the park [TS]

01:22:07   kind of like to think i need a Hitler [TS]

01:22:08   painting I just want to Hitler penny if [TS]

01:22:10   I had a Hitler painting it would be it [TS]

01:22:13   would be the crazy at the center is [TS]

01:22:15   everything a little more edgy too [TS]

01:22:16   yeah yeah then people would be like oh [TS]

01:22:18   but that that merchant marine coin [TS]

01:22:21   collection has it takes on a new strange [TS]

01:22:24   vibration the Hitler painting would have [TS]

01:22:26   been over there by the Bible plainly a [TS]

01:22:28   little bit of an art hack but but if you [TS]

01:22:30   did it i think it could really pull the [TS]

01:22:31   room together i think the other problem [TS]

01:22:35   was that all of that once I saw the [TS]

01:22:37   Hitler paintings that were not available [TS]

01:22:38   that because they were in private [TS]

01:22:40   collections and then the poultry [TS]

01:22:42   offerings that you could still buy I was [TS]

01:22:45   like I don't want to substandard what [TS]

01:22:47   they had somebody do a reproduction for [TS]

01:22:50   you [TS]

01:22:50   well I'm what was a bad person or a bad [TS]

01:22:53   person did it sound like a really bad [TS]

01:22:56   but what he found like extremely gifted [TS]

01:22:58   artist who is an extremely bad person [TS]

01:23:00   and and had them do it for you [TS]

01:23:02   mm I don't mind that like donald [TS]

01:23:05   rumsfeld did a invitation Hitler [TS]

01:23:08   painting I really fucking hang the shit [TS]

01:23:11   out of that on my wall right we go with [TS]

01:23:13   the Hitler pain we've got the internet [TS]

01:23:15   you know what in fact I now but I never [TS]

01:23:19   would have thought of this but now i [TS]

01:23:21   want some Donald Rumsfeld [TS]