Roderick on the Line

00:00:00 ◼   ► hello [TS]

00:00:06 ◼   ► I John hi marilyn is going good little [TS]

00:00:14 ◼   ► trick or something [TS]

00:00:15 ◼   ► Oh probably I probably shouldn't have [TS]

00:00:19 ◼   ► quit drinking 18 years ago it's been [TS]

00:00:22 ◼   ► that long it's been a long time it's [TS]

00:00:25 ◼   ► been the life of a person who could [TS]

00:00:27 ◼   ► serve in the military since i had a [TS]

00:00:29 ◼   ► drink last huh [TS]

00:00:33 ◼   ► enda kenny Hitler material i ever spent [TS]

00:00:38 ◼   ► the whole last week just reading about [TS]

00:00:40 ◼   ► Hitler and getting ready for our podcast [TS]

00:00:42 ◼   ► nan now now and then this was going to [TS]

00:00:45 ◼   ► be different it is going to be different [TS]

00:00:47 ◼   ► i'm committed to it [TS]

00:00:48 ◼   ► ok I got you something ready yeah John [TS]

00:00:54 ◼   ► rod is online [TS]

00:00:58 ◼   ► he's reading in the most that's amazing [TS]

00:01:08 ◼   ► it almost made me cry just like the real [TS]

00:01:11 ◼   ► one here today with my all-time favorite [TS]

00:01:15 ◼   ► bridges it's insane it's insanely good [TS]

00:01:19 ◼   ► that you know what ya gotta go there [TS]

00:01:23 ◼   ► I don't you know I don't got through my [TS]

00:01:25 ◼   ► divorce I don't want to mind that was [TS]

00:01:27 ◼   ► something that was my divorce ro my [TS]

00:01:29 ◼   ► divorce record you know it's a record [TS]

00:01:31 ◼   ► about him being divorced from his mom [TS]

00:01:33 ◼   ► oh and the XL yeah yeah that and that [TS]

00:01:40 ◼   ► either or record you see this is gonna [TS]

00:01:41 ◼   ► get down now John I want to talk about [TS]

00:01:42 ◼   ► all right let's get away let's get away [TS]

00:01:44 ◼   ► from elliott smith go right to the fact [TS]

00:01:48 ◼   ► that we are both lucky guys happy [TS]

00:01:51 ◼   ► middle-aged guys who are lucky to be [TS]

00:01:54 ◼   ► alive [TS]

00:01:55 ◼   ► it's like a crazy you know what I mean I [TS]

00:01:58 ◼   ► look around I'm alive it off I you see [TS]

00:02:00 ◼   ► all I see that absolutely before I [TS]

00:02:05 ◼   ► cannot live i cannot die [TS]

00:02:08 ◼   ► everything's great talent clearing you [TS]

00:02:14 ◼   ► know what it's ever since we started [TS]

00:02:16 ◼   ► trying to do this podcast tonight so I [TS]

00:02:18 ◼   ► ash to fix the car cats like darkness [TS]

00:02:25 ◼   ► imprisoning me that was fade to black I [TS]

00:02:29 ◼   ► think that was the suicide and then [TS]

00:02:35 ◼   ► Kirk's in the back just hammering [TS]

00:02:36 ◼   ► hammering hammering didn't want it so [TS]

00:02:38 ◼   ► it's one that's what that those alerts [TS]

00:02:39 ◼   ► from one sought the i think i was [TS]

00:02:41 ◼   ► playing well you know every Metallica [TS]

00:02:43 ◼   ► song is essentially the same it starts [TS]

00:02:46 ◼   ► out that's all [TS]

00:02:47 ◼   ► what else I mean if you had to do it's [TS]

00:02:50 ◼   ► not like nickelback crazy but you could [TS]

00:02:52 ◼   ► it starts out with that like a single [TS]

00:02:54 ◼   ► scenario guitar and then you get two or [TS]

00:02:57 ◼   ► three morphine aerial guitars don't you [TS]

00:02:59 ◼   ► think I mean especially in the early [TS]

00:03:00 ◼   ► records [TS]

00:03:01 ◼   ► did I ever tell you that did I retired [TS]

00:03:03 ◼   ► the story about the time I was sitting [TS]

00:03:05 ◼   ► around a campfire in the Czech Republic [TS]

00:03:07 ◼   ► much older story it you know I on that [TS]

00:03:12 ◼   ► alone I can't say there's just so many [TS]

00:03:14 ◼   ► stories so I just anyway that's John I'm [TS]

00:03:18 ◼   ► walking across the czech republic and [TS]

00:03:20 ◼   ► video and i have read my run in to some [TS]

00:03:23 ◼   ► teens that are there out so I'm out in [TS]

00:03:27 ◼   ► the fields right walking through some [TS]

00:03:29 ◼   ► fields and I find the error run into [TS]

00:03:31 ◼   ► these teens and they're out there [TS]

00:03:32 ◼   ► smoking cigarettes i guess or or it's a [TS]

00:03:35 ◼   ► boy a girl and they're looking for a [TS]

00:03:36 ◼   ► place to neck and they went out into the [TS]

00:03:39 ◼   ► fields to do some necking and I run into [TS]

00:03:43 ◼   ► them because i'm walking and so they [TS]

00:03:45 ◼   ► start walking with me and they kind of [TS]

00:03:47 ◼   ► adopted me I'm there like I'm the crazy [TS]

00:03:50 ◼   ► American that they found out in the out [TS]

00:03:52 ◼   ► in the field and they take me back to [TS]

00:03:54 ◼   ► their village which is a small little [TS]

00:03:56 ◼   ► village and they say hey why don't you [TS]

00:04:00 ◼   ► hang out with us we're gonna have a [TS]

00:04:01 ◼   ► campfire spaghetti party and then after [TS]

00:04:08 ◼   ► that [TS]

00:04:09 ◼   ► me maybe you can take it any party [TS]

00:04:15 ◼   ► yeah I said no I'm sorry John don't [TS]

00:04:18 ◼   ► interrupt is a translation error i had [TS]

00:04:20 ◼   ► never heard of it but I had never heard [TS]

00:04:23 ◼   ► of a campfire spaghetti party before [TS]

00:04:24 ◼   ► that sounds like three nouns they just [TS]

00:04:26 ◼   ► look so I was intrigued [TS]

00:04:29 ◼   ► ok and Barry ended and the icing on the [TS]

00:04:32 ◼   ► cake was that this kid was you know he [TS]

00:04:33 ◼   ► said maybe you can stay at my house [TS]

00:04:36 ◼   ► Oh after the party I was like oh very [TS]

00:04:39 ◼   ► good i would i would like very much to [TS]

00:04:41 ◼   ► stay at your house rather than to sleep [TS]

00:04:44 ◼   ► in a field tonight so I said sure I'll [TS]

00:04:48 ◼   ► go the campfire spaghetti party and so [TS]

00:04:51 ◼   ► I'm hanging out with these kids and the [TS]

00:04:52 ◼   ► sun is going down and and they lead me [TS]

00:04:55 ◼   ► through the village to the other side of [TS]

00:04:57 ◼   ► the village and sure enough there's a [TS]

00:04:59 ◼   ► campfire a bonfire and a bunch of kids [TS]

00:05:02 ◼   ► are there and I so we're sitting around [TS]

00:05:07 ◼   ► and pretty soon somebody whips out a [TS]

00:05:11 ◼   ► guitar and and Czechoslovakia they have [TS]

00:05:16 ◼   ► that guy said yeah and pretty soon [TS]

00:05:18 ◼   ► somebody shows up with a pot of [TS]

00:05:20 ◼   ► spaghetti that that they didn't it's not [TS]

00:05:24 ◼   ► like they cooked at the campfire [TS]

00:05:25 ◼   ► somebody showed up with a pot of [TS]

00:05:26 ◼   ► spaghetti [TS]

00:05:28 ◼   ► everybody gets a bowl and then to my [TS]

00:05:32 ◼   ► horror to my everlasting horror [TS]

00:05:34 ◼   ► something I had no i didn't realize [TS]

00:05:35 ◼   ► about eastern europe until that moment [TS]

00:05:38 ◼   ► which is that they had everybody bowl of [TS]

00:05:42 ◼   ► spaghetti and then then the bottle of [TS]

00:05:43 ◼   ► ketchup goes around haha oh so it's just [TS]

00:05:46 ◼   ► it's noodles in a bowl [TS]

00:05:48 ◼   ► it's spaghetti in a bowl and then ending [TS]

00:05:50 ◼   ► the sauce that they expect you to put on [TS]

00:05:52 ◼   ► it is is just catch up but they must [TS]

00:05:55 ◼   ► have seen it in the movies and this is a [TS]

00:05:57 ◼   ► popular dish in the Illuminations pasta [TS]

00:05:59 ◼   ► red that's right put some red sauce on [TS]

00:06:02 ◼   ► it and what do we have we have we have [TS]

00:06:03 ◼   ► catsup [TS]

00:06:04 ◼   ► so anyway so we're eating this [TS]

00:06:05 ◼   ► disgusting in a spaghetti and ketchup [TS]

00:06:08 ◼   ► and the guitars going around and and [TS]

00:06:10 ◼   ► these kids who found me on the field you [TS]

00:06:13 ◼   ► know they tell their friends she's a [TS]

00:06:14 ◼   ► musician because I made the mistake of [TS]

00:06:16 ◼   ► telling them I was a musician [TS]

00:06:18 ◼   ► this is 1999 [TS]

00:06:20 ◼   ► yes 19 and so everybody's in a hurry to [TS]

00:06:26 ◼   ► get this guitar to me like I'll get it [TS]

00:06:27 ◼   ► you know playing song playing song [TS]

00:06:29 ◼   ► playing song and I'm to mirroring and [TS]

00:06:31 ◼   ► saying I don't know any songs all the [TS]

00:06:33 ◼   ► only songs i know our songs I wrote and [TS]

00:06:35 ◼   ► you don't want to hear any of those and [TS]

00:06:38 ◼   ► they're like no no plays the song played [TS]

00:06:40 ◼   ► you know american singer guy plays the [TS]

00:06:42 ◼   ► song and I know better than to do it [TS]

00:06:46 ◼   ► I know it's the wrong move but I'm [TS]

00:06:49 ◼   ► really on the spot and so I kind of you [TS]

00:06:52 ◼   ► know acquiesce they hand me the guitar [TS]

00:06:54 ◼   ► i'm like i'm shy and I'm like all right [TS]

00:06:58 ◼   ► I'll play one of my songs they're like [TS]

00:06:59 ◼   ► yeah everybody gathers around there's 25 [TS]

00:07:02 ◼   ► kids around this bonfire at this point [TS]

00:07:04 ◼   ► and i played me me know which is the [TS]

00:07:08 ◼   ► only thing i can think of to play the [TS]

00:07:10 ◼   ► only song i can think of at that moment [TS]

00:07:12 ◼   ► is Mimi a song of my own composition and [TS]

00:07:19 ◼   ► a beautiful layered nuanced non campfire [TS]

00:07:25 ◼   ► school that's very that's generous of [TS]

00:07:26 ◼   ► you yes but it's a beautiful song that [TS]

00:07:29 ◼   ► it'sit's it is truly not a campfire song [TS]

00:07:31 ◼   ► to play for a bunch of check teenagers [TS]

00:07:33 ◼   ► making halloween and high and you know [TS]

00:07:36 ◼   ► i'm playing and i'm getting the vibe [TS]

00:07:38 ◼   ► from around the campfire i'm getting the [TS]

00:07:41 ◼   ► non-acceptance five and so I'm play you [TS]

00:07:44 ◼   ► know I started closing my eyes and the [TS]

00:07:46 ◼   ► sweat is beating up on my forehead like [TS]

00:07:48 ◼   ► I'm really blowing it here with these [TS]

00:07:49 ◼   ► kids [TS]

00:07:50 ◼   ► this is my big moment to audition my my [TS]

00:07:55 ◼   ► music for these teens and I get to the [TS]

00:07:58 ◼   ► end of me and there's like nothing just [TS]

00:08:01 ◼   ► like like a just like kind of polite [TS]

00:08:03 ◼   ► applause and some grimaces and the [TS]

00:08:06 ◼   ► teenagers who were so proud of me a [TS]

00:08:08 ◼   ► moment before i was there big catch and [TS]

00:08:10 ◼   ► their American guy now they're just [TS]

00:08:11 ◼   ► embarrassed by me and the guy sitting [TS]

00:08:15 ◼   ► next to me almost grabs the guitar out [TS]

00:08:20 ◼   ► of my hand [TS]

00:08:22 ◼   ► Angela launches into Metallica what's [TS]

00:08:32 ◼   ► the stupid song from The Black Album [TS]

00:08:34 ◼   ► from the from the with the big hippo [TS]

00:08:36 ◼   ► enter sandman i'll come on and and it [TS]

00:08:41 ◼   ► might do to get they were gonna do and [TS]

00:08:45 ◼   ► and all of a sudden the whole vibe [TS]

00:08:48 ◼   ► changes and it's like it's like James [TS]

00:08:50 ◼   ► Hetfield is there they are so excited [TS]

00:08:52 ◼   ► all these kids are so thrilled that this [TS]

00:08:55 ◼   ► guy can play enter sandman and I just [TS]

00:08:58 ◼   ► like I'm invisible to them i have become [TS]

00:09:02 ◼   ► now it's creepy that I'm there I'm 10 [TS]

00:09:05 ◼   ► years older than the whole this person [TS]

00:09:07 ◼   ► at the campfire and now I'm like some [TS]

00:09:08 ◼   ► cool people called blanket haha and i [TS]

00:09:13 ◼   ► sit there just kind of stewing in my own [TS]

00:09:15 ◼   ► flop sweat and shame slip from catch [TS]

00:09:19 ◼   ► from i see that you know like trying to [TS]

00:09:21 ◼   ► eat as much ketchup and pastas I can't [TS]

00:09:23 ◼   ► because i've only been i've been living [TS]

00:09:25 ◼   ► on leaves and snails for the two weeks [TS]

00:09:27 ◼   ► prior and then at the end of the [TS]

00:09:30 ◼   ► campfire night and you know it also i [TS]

00:09:32 ◼   ► don't drink which is which is incredibly [TS]

00:09:34 ◼   ► suspect in any campfire situation like [TS]

00:09:37 ◼   ► the old creep in the molester glasses [TS]

00:09:40 ◼   ► who doesn't drink and he's waiting for [TS]

00:09:44 ◼   ► everybody else to get drunk so you can [TS]

00:09:45 ◼   ► flip in the air and and and and we gave [TS]

00:09:48 ◼   ► him a guitar he played this song with it [TS]

00:09:50 ◼   ► and his tears were mixing with his sweat [TS]

00:09:52 ◼   ► at like everything about it was wrong [TS]

00:09:55 ◼   ► and then at the end of the night [TS]

00:09:56 ◼   ► it starts to rain the campfire party [TS]

00:09:58 ◼   ► splits up and the kid who you know the [TS]

00:10:03 ◼   ► kid who was like maybe you can stay at [TS]

00:10:04 ◼   ► my house he's like you know [TS]

00:10:05 ◼   ► okay come with me and he's really [TS]

00:10:07 ◼   ► reluctant because I'm an embarrassment [TS]

00:10:08 ◼   ► to him now we go over to his house he [TS]

00:10:11 ◼   ► says wait wait here he goes inside he [TS]

00:10:13 ◼   ► comes out 30 seconds later he's like oh [TS]

00:10:16 ◼   ► yeah my mom says no oh no after all of [TS]

00:10:19 ◼   ► that and now it's the middle of the [TS]

00:10:20 ◼   ► night and it's pouring rain display this [TS]

00:10:22 ◼   ► should have stood under I should have [TS]

00:10:26 ◼   ► stood under window and on me [TS]

00:10:31 ◼   ► so so the kid watching across the street [TS]

00:10:34 ◼   ► to like a grain warehouse that his [TS]

00:10:39 ◼   ► grandfather owns apparently people dying [TS]

00:10:42 ◼   ► this all the time the kid can't open the [TS]

00:10:44 ◼   ► door so he says well you can sleep here [TS]

00:10:48 ◼   ► on the covered loading dock and so i [TS]

00:10:54 ◼   ► unroll my sleeping bag on this concrete [TS]

00:10:56 ◼   ► loading dock under a like arclight like [TS]

00:11:01 ◼   ► under a loading dock light and I lay [TS]

00:11:04 ◼   ► there in the rain on this cement loading [TS]

00:11:07 ◼   ► dock and i think i am at my bottom [TS]

00:11:15 ◼   ► he said you guys got shown up by a check [TS]

00:11:18 ◼   ► boy playing enter sandman i said i have [TS]

00:11:21 ◼   ► found it i found my bottom here it is [TS]

00:11:24 ◼   ► and you're not even that thing is and [TS]

00:11:25 ◼   ► you weren't even you know drinking at [TS]

00:11:27 ◼   ► the time [TS]

00:11:27 ◼   ► yeah and the thing is he may I wasn't [TS]

00:11:29 ◼   ► even close to my bottom Earl and I had [TS]

00:11:31 ◼   ► no idea what was the weather other [TS]

00:11:34 ◼   ► campfires I just on the trip you just [TS]

00:11:36 ◼   ► always down in neulohe there's a person [TS]

00:11:38 ◼   ► duplo just literally slept on the beach [TS]

00:11:40 ◼   ► in Noorvik it was after that [TS]

00:11:43 ◼   ► oh how was that was the bottom I that [TS]

00:11:45 ◼   ► was that was my prior bottom now this [TS]

00:11:47 ◼   ► was a new low but the following morning [TS]

00:11:49 ◼   ► I woke up and it wasn't even that I woke [TS]

00:11:52 ◼   ► up because I didn't sleep I just lay [TS]

00:11:54 ◼   ► there on this concrete pad kind of like [TS]

00:11:57 ◼   ► tossing and turning until the first [TS]

00:12:00 ◼   ► first light of day and I got up and I [TS]

00:12:02 ◼   ► started walking [TS]

00:12:03 ◼   ► it's just like let me get out of this [TS]

00:12:05 ◼   ► same hole and it was and the sun was out [TS]

00:12:08 ◼   ► it was a beautiful day the rain had [TS]

00:12:10 ◼   ► stopped and the roads there are those [TS]

00:12:12 ◼   ► little country roads you know the roads [TS]

00:12:14 ◼   ► had all that steam coming off of them [TS]

00:12:16 ◼   ► that the the rain was just just done in [TS]

00:12:20 ◼   ► the Sun was coming up get that like [TS]

00:12:21 ◼   ► softer snow it was it was it was a dub [TS]

00:12:24 ◼   ► absolutely beautiful morning and then I [TS]

00:12:26 ◼   ► i come on to this this road it's like 11 [TS]

00:12:29 ◼   ► lane blacktop Road and the road is [TS]

00:12:31 ◼   ► completely covered with tiny frogs what [TS]

00:12:36 ◼   ► like like covered like a blanket so that [TS]

00:12:39 ◼   ► I cannot walk along the road without [TS]

00:12:40 ◼   ► stepping on frogs and the frogs are all [TS]

00:12:43 ◼   ► tiny they're like the size of a of a [TS]

00:12:45 ◼   ► silver dollar and so I couldn't walk I [TS]

00:12:48 ◼   ► couldn't kill these frogs I had to just [TS]

00:12:51 ◼   ► stand there in the road and watch this [TS]

00:12:53 ◼   ► migration it's like tide of emerald [TS]

00:12:57 ◼   ► green silver dollar frogs that it was [TS]

00:13:03 ◼   ► like an hour of an hour of my life [TS]

00:13:04 ◼   ► watching this you can be thinking that [TS]

00:13:06 ◼   ► whole time right yeah you said about [TS]

00:13:08 ◼   ► frogs you think about to get you [TS]

00:13:10 ◼   ► thinking about your bottom i'm running [TS]

00:13:12 ◼   ► the whole I'm running it all you know [TS]

00:13:13 ◼   ► and and while i'm sitting there like a [TS]

00:13:14 ◼   ► car drives by and kills 10,000 for you [TS]

00:13:18 ◼   ► bastard [TS]

00:13:19 ◼   ► oh yeah just that it's just a [TS]

00:13:22 ◼   ► day-in-the-life just happened to you I [TS]

00:13:25 ◼   ► mean not the frogs but I mean you know [TS]

00:13:27 ◼   ► that happens to be a surprising amount [TS]

00:13:29 ◼   ► of time the frogs frogs now typing here [TS]

00:13:32 ◼   ► in Seattle everyone's well I look out my [TS]

00:13:34 ◼   ► window and press it's your job as its [TS]

00:13:37 ◼   ► nails and i will talk about the ants but [TS]

00:13:39 ◼   ► you know the snails a couple nights ago [TS]

00:13:42 ◼   ► you know it really is any amount of [TS]

00:13:44 ◼   ► moisture but especially rain it's just [TS]

00:13:46 ◼   ► the whole ground just covered with [TS]

00:13:48 ◼   ► snails in there they're all fucked [TS]

00:13:49 ◼   ► they don't have a chance in san [TS]

00:13:51 ◼   ► francisco i got a high school kid set on [TS]

00:13:53 ◼   ► fire yet the day but yeah my daughter [TS]

00:13:56 ◼   ► plant the playground and him is him is a [TS]

00:13:58 ◼   ► drug user [TS]

00:13:59 ◼   ► we're hanging out at the five-year-old [TS]

00:14:01 ◼   ► playground and i'm pretty sure i see [TS]

00:14:03 ◼   ► what they're doing [TS]

00:14:05 ◼   ► my daughter is now running over to the [TS]

00:14:06 ◼   ► next playground and I walk over and I [TS]

00:14:08 ◼   ► say what you doing there and you know it [TS]

00:14:11 ◼   ► was like no he's leaving the house as [TS]

00:14:15 ◼   ► nails look so you're a put a lighter to [TS]

00:14:17 ◼   ► it huh [TS]

00:14:18 ◼   ► as you have said might be time to look [TS]

00:14:21 ◼   ► for a girlfriend haha a which is a great [TS]

00:14:26 ◼   ► go-to for when you're talking to young [TS]

00:14:28 ◼   ► men it really pretty much always works [TS]

00:14:30 ◼   ► I got a letter did I tell you this i got [TS]

00:14:32 ◼   ► a letter from a kid I got a letter from [TS]

00:14:35 ◼   ► kid who said i was so I was following [TS]

00:14:39 ◼   ► you on twitter and you said something on [TS]

00:14:42 ◼   ► Twitter about all men being terrible [TS]

00:14:45 ◼   ► where he said something that men are [TS]

00:14:47 ◼   ► worse than women [TS]

00:14:48 ◼   ► apparently i tweeted in response to [TS]

00:14:50 ◼   ► somebody who was saying that men are bad [TS]

00:14:53 ◼   ► i think it's a pretty safe statement and [TS]

00:14:55 ◼   ► I said matter but men are worse than [TS]

00:14:56 ◼   ► women and so this kid sends me an email [TS]

00:15:00 ◼   ► and he says I'm a he didn't say what how [TS]

00:15:05 ◼   ► old he was but i inferred from the [TS]

00:15:07 ◼   ► letter that he was that he was a young [TS]

00:15:12 ◼   ► person in college and he said I am a [TS]

00:15:17 ◼   ► young i'm a young straight guy and all [TS]

00:15:20 ◼   ► my all my friends are lesbians and they [TS]

00:15:24 ◼   ► are always telling me how bad men are [TS]

00:15:27 ◼   ► and i want to stand up for men and be a [TS]

00:15:32 ◼   ► good example of a good time a good [TS]

00:15:35 ◼   ► straight guy but sometimes i wonder if [TS]

00:15:39 ◼   ► it's even possible [TS]

00:15:41 ◼   ► can you advise and i said i wrote back [TS]

00:15:46 ◼   ► and said I advise you stop hanging out [TS]

00:15:48 ◼   ► with lesbians and get a girlfriend [TS]

00:15:49 ◼   ► no question yeah because the best way to [TS]

00:15:52 ◼   ► get here than anybody John the best way [TS]

00:15:54 ◼   ► to demonstrate that straight guys are [TS]

00:15:55 ◼   ► good is to be a good is to be a good [TS]

00:15:59 ◼   ► straight guy to one person [TS]

00:16:01 ◼   ► don't don't try and the country and [TS]

00:16:04 ◼   ► converts it good [TS]

00:16:06 ◼   ► straight straight guy to one person just [TS]

00:16:08 ◼   ► be a good straight man let's begin with [TS]

00:16:10 ◼   ► me [TS]

00:16:10 ◼   ► that's right that's right start start [TS]

00:16:12 ◼   ► being nice to one gal that you like [TS]

00:16:15 ◼   ► don't try and don't try to impress all [TS]

00:16:17 ◼   ► the lesbians at your height at your [TS]

00:16:19 ◼   ► school about how great you are [TS]

00:16:21 ◼   ► go find one girl and be nice to her and [TS]

00:16:25 ◼   ► he never wrote me back [TS]

00:16:27 ◼   ► I think he's probably stewing over my [TS]

00:16:29 ◼   ► advice like I would love to reach out to [TS]

00:16:30 ◼   ► that guy and really just getting a snack [TS]

00:16:32 ◼   ► because i'm just guessing a lot of those [TS]

00:16:34 ◼   ► ladies had to sit around listening to [TS]

00:16:35 ◼   ► talk about why girls don't like him you [TS]

00:16:38 ◼   ► know i I've been that guy and I've been [TS]

00:16:40 ◼   ► looking to to protect everybody's rights [TS]

00:16:42 ◼   ► and it was not good for anybody [TS]

00:16:44 ◼   ► I remember a time when all my friends [TS]

00:16:46 ◼   ► all my all my closest friends were [TS]

00:16:49 ◼   ► lesbians and i was there i was there [TS]

00:16:51 ◼   ► straight boy mascot we have a name for [TS]

00:16:54 ◼   ► that we can't use anymore [TS]

00:16:55 ◼   ► Oh [TS]

00:16:57 ◼   ► didn't give a name for that well i guess [TS]

00:17:01 ◼   ► i guess i guess this bag die [TS]

00:17:04 ◼   ► yeah I guess that would be a life again [TS]

00:17:07 ◼   ► maybe the less press bag let's Prezi ok [TS]

00:17:14 ◼   ► please address all correspondence to [TS]

00:17:17 ◼   ► John Roderick friends [TS]

00:17:21 ◼   ► yeah that's that's what I was a little [TS]

00:17:24 ◼   ► guys let's play volleyball and I don't [TS]

00:17:26 ◼   ► know what the heck I was you know what I [TS]

00:17:28 ◼   ► what it was I was sitting her i was i [TS]

00:17:30 ◼   ► was hoping that that was hoping I was [TS]

00:17:32 ◼   ► going to I don't remember what it may be [TS]

00:17:36 ◼   ► maybe I was thinking that some of them [TS]

00:17:37 ◼   ► were gonna we're gonna get over being [TS]

00:17:39 ◼   ► lesbians but i don't think that was it i [TS]

00:17:41 ◼   ► think it was that I gotta hide [TS]

00:17:45 ◼   ► i well it's I think it's this it's the [TS]

00:17:47 ◼   ► same thing with the bags you think that [TS]

00:17:49 ◼   ► you it's that you get to interact with [TS]

00:17:52 ◼   ► somebody who is the opposite sex where [TS]

00:17:54 ◼   ► the issue of sex is not present so [TS]

00:17:58 ◼   ► you're here before I i think it is [TS]

00:18:00 ◼   ► totally it makes a hundred percent it [TS]

00:18:03 ◼   ► makes a hundred percent sense if you [TS]

00:18:05 ◼   ► like to dance [TS]

00:18:07 ◼   ► it seems to me that in either the [TS]

00:18:08 ◼   ► situation's fag hag or less press it [TS]

00:18:10 ◼   ► makes a lot of sense if he just going to [TS]

00:18:12 ◼   ► go out and dance [TS]

00:18:13 ◼   ► I don't like to dance SE and that we [TS]

00:18:15 ◼   ► undergo i don't i don't want to keep [TS]

00:18:17 ◼   ► using that term that we were using [TS]

00:18:18 ◼   ► because it's normative but i but i think [TS]

00:18:21 ◼   ► those bros those news pretty good and [TS]

00:18:23 ◼   ► it's solid I think we can still we can [TS]

00:18:25 ◼   ► use it and then it because the the [TS]

00:18:28 ◼   ► people that will be offended by it are [TS]

00:18:30 ◼   ► are going to gonna take it's cool it's [TS]

00:18:33 ◼   ► gonna take some time for them to get [TS]

00:18:34 ◼   ► caught up with how smart and funny it is [TS]

00:18:37 ◼   ► i think that they can be offended by but [TS]

00:18:39 ◼   ► by then we'll be let's just stay away [TS]

00:18:40 ◼   ► from PETA um but you know I actually you [TS]

00:18:44 ◼   ► are on a couple things first of all I [TS]

00:18:45 ◼   ► think we've talked about in the past is [TS]

00:18:47 ◼   ► are both of our if I perceive this [TS]

00:18:50 ◼   ► correctly for you as well as me or [TS]

00:18:53 ◼   ► ineffectiveness at first starting out [TS]

00:18:56 ◼   ► being kind of like envious or angry [TS]

00:18:58 ◼   ► about our friends who who were sexually [TS]

00:19:01 ◼   ► potent right remember talking about you [TS]

00:19:05 ◼   ► know the the our friends who are going [TS]

00:19:07 ◼   ► out and you know finger banging and [TS]

00:19:09 ◼   ► stuff and how we felt kind of betrayed [TS]

00:19:10 ◼   ► by a drone [TS]

00:19:11 ◼   ► Adam still from ya know i was i was [TS]

00:19:14 ◼   ► heavy real heavy and and but i think [TS]

00:19:17 ◼   ► that apartment [TS]

00:19:18 ◼   ► this is other thing that is not i think [TS]

00:19:20 ◼   ► it exists without respect any given [TS]

00:19:23 ◼   ► gender and sexual orientation mix-up [TS]

00:19:27 ◼   ► which is that everybody's always kind of [TS]

00:19:30 ◼   ► in the back of their minds thinking [TS]

00:19:31 ◼   ► they're going to be able to flip the [TS]

00:19:33 ◼   ► client at some point and i think it's i [TS]

00:19:35 ◼   ► think it's it's true you you see it on [TS]

00:19:37 ◼   ► all conceivable sides you know it could [TS]

00:19:40 ◼   ► be that's you know what even could be [TS]

00:19:41 ◼   ► somebody who's married like look at all [TS]

00:19:43 ◼   ► the especially I guess see mostly women [TS]

00:19:45 ◼   ► but men to her like oh they're going to [TS]

00:19:48 ◼   ► voice to divorce their spouse and we'll [TS]

00:19:50 ◼   ► finally be able to go you know [TS]

00:19:51 ◼   ► yeah we'll be together live live on the [TS]

00:19:53 ◼   ► Isle of Man together or whatever and [TS]

00:19:56 ◼   ► what I mean I also i think there is the [TS]

00:19:58 ◼   ► Isle of Man is that a fantasy for people [TS]

00:20:00 ◼   ► i don't know III really pulled it out as [TS]

00:20:02 ◼   ► quick as I could [TS]

00:20:03 ◼   ► yeah i would google it except my [TS]

00:20:05 ◼   ► keyboard is still broken John I ordered [TS]

00:20:08 ◼   ► the thing that you said how i ordered it [TS]

00:20:11 ◼   ► from my phone use your telephone [TS]

00:20:12 ◼   ► you can shop from your phone now you [TS]

00:20:14 ◼   ► have done that done that a lot anyway [TS]

00:20:16 ◼   ► it's probably rathole to get into but [TS]

00:20:18 ◼   ► you know it's really not so far away [TS]

00:20:19 ◼   ► from guitar guy you know I'm you sit [TS]

00:20:22 ◼   ► around and and you have a really mixed [TS]

00:20:25 ◼   ► up idea about where you should be [TS]

00:20:27 ◼   ► focusing your attention and then what [TS]

00:20:29 ◼   ► you should do once you've gotten that [TS]

00:20:30 ◼   ► attention [TS]

00:20:31 ◼   ► yeah it really it really is an [TS]

00:20:33 ◼   ► affliction and it's there [TS]

00:20:35 ◼   ► there are a lot of things that make me [TS]

00:20:37 ◼   ► cringe about every aspect of my life but [TS]

00:20:39 ◼   ► if I'm really I go back and I and I [TS]

00:20:41 ◼   ► allow myself just for the blink of an [TS]

00:20:43 ◼   ► eye to think about those kinds of times [TS]

00:20:44 ◼   ► there's the ones that really really make [TS]

00:20:46 ◼   ► me cringe [TS]

00:20:47 ◼   ► you are the times when I got really [TS]

00:20:48 ◼   ► really wrong for the times when I was [TS]

00:20:50 ◼   ► guitar guy or the times when I thought I [TS]

00:20:52 ◼   ► was you know as speaking the truth to [TS]

00:20:54 ◼   ► power [TS]

00:20:55 ◼   ► you know because I I couldn't fingerbang [TS]

00:20:57 ◼   ► well i was thinking about this the other [TS]

00:20:59 ◼   ► day there was a there was a hell of a [TS]

00:21:01 ◼   ► pretty long period in my life where I [TS]

00:21:04 ◼   ► when I was in the company of a girl that [TS]

00:21:07 ◼   ► I liked and she liked me and it was [TS]

00:21:08 ◼   ► clear that we liked one another and we [TS]

00:21:10 ◼   ► were going someplace down the street [TS]

00:21:12 ◼   ► we're walking somewhere I would put my [TS]

00:21:15 ◼   ► arm around her [TS]

00:21:17 ◼   ► and she would put her arm around me and [TS]

00:21:19 ◼   ► we would we would attempt to make our [TS]

00:21:23 ◼   ► way down the sidewalk in that [TS]

00:21:26 ◼   ► three-legged race cadence of a tall guy [TS]

00:21:31 ◼   ► with his arm around his girlfriend and [TS]

00:21:33 ◼   ► her with hit her arm around him and [TS]

00:21:35 ◼   ► there is absolutely no tempo or pace [TS]

00:21:37 ◼   ► that we can walk comfortably in that [TS]

00:21:40 ◼   ► configuration like her hip [TS]

00:21:43 ◼   ► she's going up and I'm going down her [TS]

00:21:44 ◼   ► hip is bumping into me like those people [TS]

00:21:47 ◼   ► that are able to walk down the street [TS]

00:21:49 ◼   ► with their hands or with their arms [TS]

00:21:52 ◼   ► around one another even likelike for the [TS]

00:21:54 ◼   ► freewheelin bob dylan likely yeah yeah [TS]

00:21:57 ◼   ► girl walking down the street and acting [TS]

00:21:59 ◼   ► like that's something you could do for [TS]

00:22:00 ◼   ► more than half a block [TS]

00:22:01 ◼   ► yeah I've got my hand on her hip she's [TS]

00:22:03 ◼   ► got her arm around my waist and we are [TS]

00:22:05 ◼   ► crashing into each other like two [TS]

00:22:08 ◼   ► battleships tied up to the same dock in [TS]

00:22:11 ◼   ► a storm like there is no they were but [TS]

00:22:15 ◼   ► there's no there's no case like the the [TS]

00:22:19 ◼   ► sidewalk is just this stormy sea and yet [TS]

00:22:22 ◼   ► we feel because we are young and in love [TS]

00:22:25 ◼   ► that we should be walking this way we [TS]

00:22:27 ◼   ► should be embracing as we walk down the [TS]

00:22:29 ◼   ► street and I realized the other day it's [TS]

00:22:32 ◼   ► been 15 years since i made the mistake [TS]

00:22:35 ◼   ► of thinking you could walk down the [TS]

00:22:37 ◼   ► street side by side with your arm around [TS]

00:22:39 ◼   ► somebody like it's not a problem anymore [TS]

00:22:42 ◼   ► because it's simply something I don't do [TS]

00:22:44 ◼   ► but for the first ten years that I was [TS]

00:22:48 ◼   ► romantically involved with girls i was [TS]

00:22:50 ◼   ► always in this posture of like oh here [TS]

00:22:52 ◼   ► we are again like 22 [TS]

00:22:55 ◼   ► pool balls in a Crown Royal bag and [TS]

00:23:01 ◼   ► there's that you know and it was my [TS]

00:23:04 ◼   ► grandfather there's no way there's no [TS]

00:23:07 ◼   ► way to make this work when you see [TS]

00:23:10 ◼   ► somebody tried to walk two different [TS]

00:23:12 ◼   ► sized dogs like you get like what like [TS]

00:23:14 ◼   ► an akita and a shih tzu and it's [TS]

00:23:16 ◼   ► impossible to walk two dogs of different [TS]

00:23:18 ◼   ► sizes and it sounds like what you're [TS]

00:23:20 ◼   ► describing even in the best of [TS]

00:23:21 ◼   ► circumstances are the same size the same [TS]

00:23:23 ◼   ► gate it's going to be hard but but [TS]

00:23:25 ◼   ► you're the the the akita and the Afghan [TS]

00:23:27 ◼   ► the boys away in that situation the [TS]

00:23:29 ◼   ► thing to do in a situation like that is [TS]

00:23:30 ◼   ► to put us [TS]

00:23:31 ◼   ► battle on the akid akita but the shih [TS]

00:23:34 ◼   ► tzu in the saddle and then then then you [TS]

00:23:37 ◼   ► are everybody's fucking hero [TS]

00:23:39 ◼   ► I think a lot about riding dogs yeah and [TS]

00:23:42 ◼   ► dogs fighting other guys with my [TS]

00:23:43 ◼   ► daughter and I were talking about this [TS]

00:23:44 ◼   ► house finally beat dogs to write other [TS]

00:23:45 ◼   ► dogs I think I think dogs can those [TS]

00:23:48 ◼   ► those fucking dogs live in people's [TS]

00:23:49 ◼   ► purses [TS]

00:23:50 ◼   ► yeah they probably have a chance to [TS]

00:23:52 ◼   ► write another dog yeah just that just [TS]

00:23:54 ◼   ► that immediate contact the problem is [TS]

00:23:56 ◼   ► that a dog big enough for me to ride [TS]

00:23:58 ◼   ► would be the size of a brown bear and [TS]

00:24:02 ◼   ► then it would basically a dog the size [TS]

00:24:04 ◼   ► of a brown bear is a brown pic he looks [TS]

00:24:06 ◼   ► like a Molly Hatchet up from haha yeah [TS]

00:24:11 ◼   ► I'd have a battle-axe yes and a helmet [TS]

00:24:13 ◼   ► with to warn you know you need out you [TS]

00:24:15 ◼   ► need a big brown for set of their I'd be [TS]

00:24:17 ◼   ► driving riding a bear for my god why why [TS]

00:24:20 ◼   ► can't I do that you should if I may say [TS]

00:24:24 ◼   ► consider trading in one of the hoop DS [TS]

00:24:27 ◼   ► and make a down payment on their i I've [TS]

00:24:31 ◼   ► I what kind of mileage to get out of [TS]

00:24:32 ◼   ► there i mean like i didn't know a lot of [TS]

00:24:33 ◼   ► bears [TS]

00:24:34 ◼   ► I've seen a lot of bears I've known a [TS]

00:24:35 ◼   ► lot of bears look I've never seen a man [TS]

00:24:37 ◼   ► right a bit coming to that come to the [TS]

00:24:41 ◼   ► castro if a man had ever ridden a bear i [TS]

00:24:43 ◼   ► think i've seen the picture of it [TS]

00:24:45 ◼   ► actually bears playing like footsie with [TS]

00:24:48 ◼   ► husky dogs yeah I've seen a bear dance [TS]

00:24:51 ◼   ► to a violin never seen a man right there [TS]

00:24:56 ◼   ► buddy [TS]

00:24:59 ◼   ► yeah I there's a child enjoyed the show [TS]

00:25:01 ◼   ► general been his gentle Ben was a big [TS]

00:25:03 ◼   ► bear i think he was in train TV bear [TS]

00:25:06 ◼   ► teddy bear but I mean the thing is you [TS]

00:25:08 ◼   ► you can stay I mean you can stare down [TS]

00:25:11 ◼   ► an animal with with dignity and respect [TS]

00:25:13 ◼   ► and and you know it seems like in the [TS]

00:25:16 ◼   ► fullness of time you could not only get [TS]

00:25:18 ◼   ► it on your side but it could get you on [TS]

00:25:20 ◼   ► its side you there would be a [TS]

00:25:22 ◼   ► relationship there were three you could [TS]

00:25:24 ◼   ► just literally as you i think you could [TS]

00:25:27 ◼   ► go probably bareback on the bear [TS]

00:25:29 ◼   ► mm and then and just will write up to [TS]

00:25:32 ◼   ► Josh's office on a bear you know if I [TS]

00:25:35 ◼   ► goodbye treat you so differently if you [TS]

00:25:37 ◼   ► had a bathrobe and a scimitars and you [TS]

00:25:38 ◼   ► were right it literally writing a bear [TS]

00:25:40 ◼   ► listen if I was right if I could write a [TS]

00:25:41 ◼   ► bear [TS]

00:25:42 ◼   ► the last place i would go is my indie [TS]

00:25:45 ◼   ► rock record label [TS]

00:25:47 ◼   ► where would you start I would not i [TS]

00:25:49 ◼   ► would i would be so far away from indie [TS]

00:25:51 ◼   ► rock i would be the guy who could ride [TS]

00:25:54 ◼   ► bears i think i would be a fucking [TS]

00:25:58 ◼   ► parade everywhere I went I would go [TS]

00:25:59 ◼   ► immediately to downtown Seattle the [TS]

00:26:02 ◼   ► library and they would you know they'd [TS]

00:26:04 ◼   ► be closing u-joints that like you don't [TS]

00:26:05 ◼   ► like that library you should march you [TS]

00:26:07 ◼   ► and your bare and we gotta get a name [TS]

00:26:08 ◼   ► for the bear you and your bear should [TS]

00:26:10 ◼   ► just march right into that library [TS]

00:26:11 ◼   ► here's the problem with that library [TS]

00:26:13 ◼   ► yeah it the the traffic flow is so [TS]

00:26:16 ◼   ► constricted there's no place you could [TS]

00:26:17 ◼   ► ride a bear into that my prayers and [TS]

00:26:19 ◼   ► maneuverable you would ride this bear [TS]

00:26:21 ◼   ► right into an escalator alcove [TS]

00:26:24 ◼   ► apparently sarah you ever seen the way [TS]

00:26:26 ◼   ► they wiggle around I saw a picture the [TS]

00:26:28 ◼   ► other day of a ferret that someone had [TS]

00:26:29 ◼   ► given some kind of steroids 20 the [TS]

00:26:33 ◼   ► keyboard the well i'm looking at some of [TS]

00:26:36 ◼   ► the stuff on my phone I have to get a [TS]

00:26:38 ◼   ► nicer internet on my phone [TS]

00:26:40 ◼   ► ok and so so the the picture was fairly [TS]

00:26:42 ◼   ► small maybe I didn't get this right was [TS]

00:26:45 ◼   ► it miss taste but this ferret looked [TS]

00:26:47 ◼   ► know it had grown really long hair and [TS]

00:26:50 ◼   ► it looked like a toy poodle o house of [TS]

00:26:53 ◼   ► it was a fair with like with a big white [TS]

00:26:55 ◼   ► afro and now picture that the size of a [TS]

00:27:01 ◼   ► bear yeah and now you found you don't [TS]

00:27:04 ◼   ► talk about that my friend John you can [TS]

00:27:06 ◼   ► i'm going to cover the cover of heavy [TS]

00:27:07 ◼   ► metal magazine in 1982 what about it I [TS]

00:27:10 ◼   ► got it restart the franchise if it's a [TS]

00:27:12 ◼   ► listen I know I don't have a lot of [TS]

00:27:14 ◼   ► dough right now but apparently there is [TS]

00:27:15 ◼   ► a man and since it [TS]

00:27:17 ◼   ► Seattle who literally rides a fucking [TS]

00:27:20 ◼   ► bear 50,000 watts of power or do [TS]

00:27:23 ◼   ► whatever way ticket to bear rides you [TS]

00:27:27 ◼   ► know and i have to say that you know it [TS]

00:27:30 ◼   ► seems to me that once you become for [TS]

00:27:31 ◼   ► example once you become a horse person [TS]

00:27:33 ◼   ► and let's be careful here once you [TS]

00:27:36 ◼   ► become someone who's hoarsely horsey [TS]

00:27:39 ◼   ► horse you get a horse and then it's it's [TS]

00:27:41 ◼   ► kinda like comics or models or rubber [TS]

00:27:43 ◼   ► girls you want to get more and soon you [TS]

00:27:45 ◼   ► have a stable of horses [TS]

00:27:48 ◼   ► I got to tell you got a big barn could [TS]

00:27:50 ◼   ► probably use a little bit of work right [TS]

00:27:51 ◼   ► you're not using for that mean you like [TS]

00:27:52 ◼   ► specific things right now you're not a [TS]

00:27:54 ◼   ► meat or anything no it's best to store [TS]

00:27:56 ◼   ► and right now but still investments but [TS]

00:27:58 ◼   ► you could scoop that aside i am but I'm [TS]

00:28:00 ◼   ► a whore i am a horse person of Vespas [TS]

00:28:02 ◼   ► okay no okay but you could also i mean [TS]

00:28:06 ◼   ► like you've got that set in the family [TS]

00:28:08 ◼   ► that takes care of alcoholic horses [TS]

00:28:09 ◼   ► couldn't you couldn't conceivably with [TS]

00:28:12 ◼   ► your vast rock-and-roll money couldn't [TS]

00:28:14 ◼   ► you have like a stable of bears your [TS]

00:28:15 ◼   ► whole family could ride around on my [TS]

00:28:18 ◼   ► neighbors have Merlin have you ever seen [TS]

00:28:19 ◼   ► a bear a bear is bigger and tougher than [TS]

00:28:22 ◼   ► people think parents there is big [TS]

00:28:25 ◼   ► yeah it's very big even a small bear's [TS]

00:28:27 ◼   ► big and they're also there i mean i'm [TS]

00:28:31 ◼   ► not going to say that they are fully [TS]

00:28:32 ◼   ► clever [TS]

00:28:34 ◼   ► oh I think they pick up there like [TS]

00:28:36 ◼   ► raccoons there they are like the [TS]

00:28:38 ◼   ► raccoons and they pick stuff up real [TS]

00:28:40 ◼   ► fast you know raccoons kind of like a [TS]

00:28:41 ◼   ► little bear a raccoon is a little Nazi [TS]

00:28:46 ◼   ► bear that's right isn't that what [TS]

00:28:48 ◼   ► they're called little look [TS]

00:28:49 ◼   ► yes yeah they call them right back to [TS]

00:28:52 ◼   ► Hitler right regular right boys if it's [TS]

00:28:55 ◼   ► not even a half an hour and we're back [TS]

00:28:56 ◼   ► to him [TS]

00:28:57 ◼   ► 2052 raccoon schiessen they call them in [TS]

00:29:00 ◼   ► disguise [TS]

00:29:01 ◼   ► no no bears bears the thing is a bear [TS]

00:29:03 ◼   ► you think about a bear most people who [TS]

00:29:04 ◼   ► think about bears they don't think about [TS]

00:29:06 ◼   ► barefoot when if you do you mentally [TS]

00:29:08 ◼   ► picture a bear you you picture this kind [TS]

00:29:10 ◼   ► of you know large elegant like fairly [TS]

00:29:14 ◼   ► like sleek animal with giant claws but [TS]

00:29:17 ◼   ► the thing is the real blobby they're [TS]

00:29:19 ◼   ► real like they're almost like a big [TS]

00:29:20 ◼   ► whale they got a horse like kind of like [TS]

00:29:22 ◼   ► tapered neck and they're super fucking [TS]

00:29:25 ◼   ► scary if you ever see a bear out and [TS]

00:29:27 ◼   ► around even doing nothing they're [TS]

00:29:28 ◼   ► terrifying are you describing a bear [TS]

00:29:30 ◼   ► that from just having read about them in [TS]

00:29:32 ◼   ► books from yes yes yes Louis thing I've [TS]

00:29:36 ◼   ► been translated from a different [TS]

00:29:37 ◼   ► language [TS]

00:29:38 ◼   ► yeah it's it represents Isaiah did I [TS]

00:29:41 ◼   ► tell you that I were talking about the [TS]

00:29:42 ◼   ► time the so so that's soon yeah it's I [TS]

00:29:48 ◼   ► don't want to go down [TS]

00:29:50 ◼   ► I don't want to go down the rabbit hole [TS]

00:29:51 ◼   ► of all the times that i have been [TS]

00:29:53 ◼   ► literally tracked by a bear [TS]

00:29:58 ◼   ► I got nowhere to be but gimme gimme a [TS]

00:30:02 ◼   ► good one but one time so i have a 5 a [TS]

00:30:05 ◼   ► very good friend i've mentioned him on [TS]

00:30:07 ◼   ► the podcast before never by name [TS]

00:30:09 ◼   ► he he is a he is probably 12 years of is [TS]

00:30:13 ◼   ► a close friend and also he still lives [TS]

00:30:15 ◼   ► in Alaska is by far my closest friend [TS]

00:30:18 ◼   ► who still lives in Alaska and he has a [TS]

00:30:21 ◼   ► cabin that his father built on a small [TS]

00:30:25 ◼   ► lake in the shadow of Mount McKinley or [TS]

00:30:28 ◼   ► Denali the great one largest mountain in [TS]

00:30:34 ◼   ► them in the in the North America and [TS]

00:30:39 ◼   ► it's a little little tiny cabin up on [TS]

00:30:42 ◼   ► this lake and they they named the lake [TS]

00:30:45 ◼   ► after themselves [TS]

00:30:47 ◼   ► his father at the family because if you [TS]

00:30:49 ◼   ► have if you have a lake [TS]

00:30:51 ◼   ► what are you going to call it going to [TS]

00:30:54 ◼   ► call it small lake you're gonna call it [TS]

00:30:55 ◼   ► dark lake now you're going to call it [TS]

00:30:59 ◼   ► you're going to name the lake after [TS]

00:31:00 ◼   ► yourself and that's what they did but if [TS]

00:31:02 ◼   ► the lake is too small and too well it's [TS]

00:31:07 ◼   ► not too small to land a floatplane on [TS]

00:31:09 ◼   ► but it is too small to take that float [TS]

00:31:13 ◼   ► plane back off right you could set the [TS]

00:31:16 ◼   ► plane down like a floodplain lobster [TS]

00:31:19 ◼   ► trap exactly if you landed a floatplane [TS]

00:31:21 ◼   ► office like it would be that float plane [TS]

00:31:24 ◼   ► would would live there forever so this [TS]

00:31:25 ◼   ► sucks because it was a little bigger it [TS]

00:31:27 ◼   ► would be it would be pretty amazing to [TS]

00:31:29 ◼   ► be able to get into this place so much [TS]

00:31:31 ◼   ► easier [TS]

00:31:32 ◼   ► exactly that is just take it out easier [TS]

00:31:34 ◼   ► is if this lake was one acre bigger and [TS]

00:31:38 ◼   ► you could take the plane off then this [TS]

00:31:41 ◼   ► this cabin would be immediate be it [TS]

00:31:44 ◼   ► would be the hilton of Alaska cabins but [TS]

00:31:48 ◼   ► as it is the only way to get to this [TS]

00:31:51 ◼   ► cabin there are two ways to get to one [TS]

00:31:53 ◼   ► you can float down the shit no River to [TS]

00:31:57 ◼   ► the chill in the river to the place [TS]

00:32:00 ◼   ► where the children of forks into the [TS]

00:32:02 ◼   ► Talkeetna and then pull your rubber raft [TS]

00:32:06 ◼   ► off and hike in five miles through the [TS]

00:32:08 ◼   ► doubles clubs [TS]

00:32:10 ◼   ► or you can in the wintertime you can [TS]

00:32:12 ◼   ► land your ski plane on the swamp that is [TS]

00:32:18 ◼   ► two miles through the forest to the [TS]

00:32:22 ◼   ► little lake so you'll and the ski plane [TS]

00:32:25 ◼   ► on the swamp but the problem it was that [TS]

00:32:27 ◼   ► the problem with that is the swamp never [TS]

00:32:30 ◼   ► completely freezes because it's always [TS]

00:32:33 ◼   ► kind of like methane me you know like [TS]

00:32:38 ◼   ► Earth farts database that key exactly [TS]

00:32:42 ◼   ► that keeps the ice from members being [TS]

00:32:44 ◼   ► solid so you can land this keep playing [TS]

00:32:46 ◼   ► on this one but you have to kind of keep [TS]

00:32:47 ◼   ► the ski plane moving a little bit [TS]

00:32:50 ◼   ► because if you turn it on if you stop [TS]

00:32:53 ◼   ► the motor and you turn the plane off the [TS]

00:32:56 ◼   ► seaplane under the ski plane was just [TS]

00:32:57 ◼   ► kind of sink into the slush and that is [TS]

00:33:00 ◼   ► a ski plane like an Indiana Jones thing [TS]

00:33:03 ◼   ► like it'sit's got pontoon is that what [TS]

00:33:05 ◼   ► that is don't have skis out you take the [TS]

00:33:08 ◼   ► pontoons off and you put skis on that [TS]

00:33:10 ◼   ► just do that [TS]

00:33:11 ◼   ► yeah when you landed on the snow but if [TS]

00:33:15 ◼   ► you landed on the deep snow or [TS]

00:33:16 ◼   ► particularly if you landed on deep snow [TS]

00:33:17 ◼   ► in a man swamp that isn't that where the [TS]

00:33:20 ◼   ► ice doesn't freeze you can get in [TS]

00:33:23 ◼   ► trouble you get the skis can sink into [TS]

00:33:24 ◼   ► the snow just thinking like that with I [TS]

00:33:26 ◼   ► mean I know very little about you know [TS]

00:33:28 ◼   ► aeronautics but it seems like a ski [TS]

00:33:30 ◼   ► plane would be especially hard to take [TS]

00:33:31 ◼   ► off with because you are really relying [TS]

00:33:34 ◼   ► just on the propeller to get you moving [TS]

00:33:37 ◼   ► yeah but once you're up it's like it's [TS]

00:33:39 ◼   ► like a water if you like is that would [TS]

00:33:40 ◼   ► be one thing but if you're on anywhere [TS]

00:33:42 ◼   ► where you know any kind of incline it [TS]

00:33:44 ◼   ► seems to be pretty tough to take off [TS]

00:33:46 ◼   ► it's tough it's tough if you let this if [TS]

00:33:49 ◼   ► you let the plane sink but if the [TS]

00:33:50 ◼   ► plaintiff you keep the plane moving it [TS]

00:33:52 ◼   ► stays up on top of the snow and then [TS]

00:33:55 ◼   ► you're just few just bobbing leaders [TS]

00:33:56 ◼   ► floating along this little cushion of [TS]

00:33:58 ◼   ► snow it's quite it's it's very easy to [TS]

00:34:01 ◼   ► take off but you have to kind of keep [TS]

00:34:02 ◼   ► the plane moving so when we when we fly [TS]

00:34:04 ◼   ► up to this cabin in the winter the [TS]

00:34:06 ◼   ► pipette also the plane only seats two [TS]

00:34:08 ◼   ► people the pilot and the passenger so to [TS]

00:34:11 ◼   ► go up there with a small group of people [TS]

00:34:12 ◼   ► you have to go up in multiple trips [TS]

00:34:15 ◼   ► so what happens is the plane lands on [TS]

00:34:18 ◼   ► sucking plastic over it lands on the [TS]

00:34:20 ◼   ► snow but the pilot has to kind of keep [TS]

00:34:22 ◼   ► the plane moving slowly moving along the [TS]

00:34:25 ◼   ► swamp and you throw open the door and [TS]

00:34:27 ◼   ► start throwing your bags out into the [TS]

00:34:30 ◼   ► snow and then you throw your snowshoes [TS]

00:34:33 ◼   ► out and then you jump out of the plane [TS]

00:34:34 ◼   ► and the plane just kind of keeps moving [TS]

00:34:38 ◼   ► and so you jump out onto your snowshoes [TS]

00:34:40 ◼   ► and you go by and he goes by and then he [TS]

00:34:42 ◼   ► hits the gas and he flies away and then [TS]

00:34:44 ◼   ► you're alone on the swamp and you wait [TS]

00:34:48 ◼   ► there until you sit and every aspect of [TS]

00:34:51 ◼   ► this sounds good John Carpenter movie [TS]

00:34:52 ◼   ► will be there for 45 minutes until [TS]

00:34:55 ◼   ► curtain Russell comes and then there's a [TS]

00:34:57 ◼   ► then there's a dog that has been [TS]

00:34:59 ◼   ► infected with some kind of alien guy [TS]

00:35:02 ◼   ► William Shatner mask superbug but anyway [TS]

00:35:04 ◼   ► so when you leave the cabin 10 days to [TS]

00:35:08 ◼   ► weeks later you have to leave via the [TS]

00:35:11 ◼   ► same method so yeah it's kind of its [TS]

00:35:14 ◼   ► kind of emotion [TS]

00:35:16 ◼   ► well serviced the first of all one at a [TS]

00:35:18 ◼   ► time and second of all yeah you kind of [TS]

00:35:20 ◼   ► the plane like lands and keeps the motor [TS]

00:35:23 ◼   ► running [TS]

00:35:24 ◼   ► that was a cable car you got to just [TS]

00:35:25 ◼   ► kind of jump on yeah it's just kinda [TS]

00:35:27 ◼   ► it's just puttering along is moving fast [TS]

00:35:29 ◼   ► but just like puttering along and you [TS]

00:35:31 ◼   ► just throw your stuff in you get up on [TS]

00:35:32 ◼   ► the ski and then you climb in the plane [TS]

00:35:34 ◼   ► and then off you go [TS]

00:35:35 ◼   ► and so when you leave but of course [TS]

00:35:38 ◼   ► there's no I mean back then we didn't [TS]

00:35:40 ◼   ► have cellphones and even even if you did [TS]

00:35:43 ◼   ► i'm not even sure there would be [TS]

00:35:44 ◼   ► cellphone service there i got really [TS]

00:35:47 ◼   ► doubt it but at the time we had a pre [TS]

00:35:49 ◼   ► appointed time when the plane would come [TS]

00:35:54 ◼   ► get us [TS]

00:35:55 ◼   ► like noon on Sunday [TS]

00:35:58 ◼   ► he's just gonna fly fly out there and [TS]

00:36:00 ◼   ► and we should be waiting and one time I [TS]

00:36:05 ◼   ► was a wee while we're at the cabin [TS]

00:36:09 ◼   ► we've seen a bear kind of over on the [TS]

00:36:12 ◼   ► you know the forest edge and and my [TS]

00:36:15 ◼   ► friends dad had multiple kind of [TS]

00:36:18 ◼   ► encounters with bears at that at the [TS]

00:36:20 ◼   ► cabin and his feeling about them was [TS]

00:36:22 ◼   ► that a bear couldn't tell the difference [TS]

00:36:23 ◼   ► between a window and a door and [TS]

00:36:26 ◼   ► all the bear would just kind of Hammer [TS]

00:36:29 ◼   ► on the outside of the cabin and you [TS]

00:36:31 ◼   ► would sit inside just kind of hoping [TS]

00:36:33 ◼   ► that the bear didn't figure out the [TS]

00:36:35 ◼   ► window was less solid you know the bear [TS]

00:36:40 ◼   ► would just kind of pound on the door and [TS]

00:36:42 ◼   ► then you have the door barred by one [TS]

00:36:46 ◼   ► point my friend's dad went out he had a [TS]

00:36:48 ◼   ► sawed-off shotgun he went out and shot [TS]

00:36:50 ◼   ► the gun in the air to scare the bear and [TS]

00:36:51 ◼   ► the gun exploded in his hand and then [TS]

00:36:53 ◼   ► his hand was all shredded and yeah he [TS]

00:36:57 ◼   ► had to get the money to get me any of it [TS]

00:37:00 ◼   ► wait two days and just fucking moving [TS]

00:37:02 ◼   ► plane know that he had so he got the [TS]

00:37:04 ◼   ► shortwave radio out from under the cabin [TS]

00:37:06 ◼   ► and fired up the gas generator to power [TS]

00:37:08 ◼   ► your shoulder a little scatman crothers [TS]

00:37:10 ◼   ► yeah yeah exactly [TS]

00:37:12 ◼   ► come in come in Mayday Mayday but anyway [TS]

00:37:16 ◼   ► so one time I i drew the short straw i [TS]

00:37:20 ◼   ► was first one out on the day that we [TS]

00:37:23 ◼   ► were leaving and I went on my snowshoes [TS]

00:37:25 ◼   ► with my bag and I snow chute out across [TS]

00:37:29 ◼   ► the the little frozen lake in front of [TS]

00:37:31 ◼   ► the cabin using the two miles now how [TS]

00:37:33 ◼   ► far [TS]

00:37:34 ◼   ► yeah yeah couple of miles so you go [TS]

00:37:36 ◼   ► across the miles in the snow [TS]

00:37:38 ◼   ► yeah we would snowshoe a lot longer than [TS]

00:37:41 ◼   ► that but but but it's a try it's a truck [TS]

00:37:44 ◼   ► carrying a bag to carry bag is it soon [TS]

00:37:46 ◼   ► as it is it's you anywhere near the big [TS]

00:37:48 ◼   ► finale thing but it is the air in there [TS]

00:37:51 ◼   ► no that's where down we're not up in the [TS]

00:37:54 ◼   ► run-up hi cap but it's you know it's [TS]

00:37:57 ◼   ► it's cold it's 30 below zero or [TS]

00:38:00 ◼   ► something and so so you know she across [TS]

00:38:03 ◼   ► the lake and then you snowshoe through [TS]

00:38:05 ◼   ► the forest and there you have the miler [TS]

00:38:07 ◼   ► or or a mile-and-a-half through the [TS]

00:38:09 ◼   ► forest and then you come out the other [TS]

00:38:12 ◼   ► side of the forest and you're in the [TS]

00:38:13 ◼   ► swamp you walk out on the swamp and then [TS]

00:38:16 ◼   ► the plane arrives well so I'm walking [TS]

00:38:18 ◼   ► due to do to be in my you know my like [TS]

00:38:22 ◼   ► John on snowshoes in the forest thing to [TS]

00:38:27 ◼   ► do and and just as I clear the forest on [TS]

00:38:35 ◼   ► the other side [TS]

00:38:38 ◼   ► here like a shotgun and I'm like what [TS]

00:38:45 ◼   ► the hell you know but it's not the [TS]

00:38:48 ◼   ► craziest thing to here in Alaska shotgun [TS]

00:38:50 ◼   ► tell me an apology but I kind of you [TS]

00:38:54 ◼   ► know I have a pistol and so I kind of [TS]

00:38:56 ◼   ► like have my hand on my pistol in case [TS]

00:39:01 ◼   ► it is this all true [TS]

00:39:03 ◼   ► what I mean is it all true he's his snow [TS]

00:39:07 ◼   ► chute two miles toward a swamp or a plan [TS]

00:39:10 ◼   ► on skis would take off somebody shot a [TS]

00:39:12 ◼   ► shotgun but it's okay because you had a [TS]

00:39:13 ◼   ► sidearm well wasn't okay i mean i had a [TS]

00:39:16 ◼   ► sidearm and now that was where is that [TS]

00:39:19 ◼   ► if it were if the shotgun were a crazy [TS]

00:39:24 ◼   ► person not a crazy person but if the [TS]

00:39:26 ◼   ► shotgun were let's say for instance a [TS]

00:39:28 ◼   ► crazy trapper had a little shooting like [TS]

00:39:32 ◼   ► erratically yeah or somebody had gone [TS]

00:39:35 ◼   ► and was shooting my friend right like I [TS]

00:39:38 ◼   ► wasn't out there I wasn't out there with [TS]

00:39:40 ◼   ► the pack of chewing gum and a slingshot [TS]

00:39:42 ◼   ► sure you must be this would be wondering [TS]

00:39:45 ◼   ► 11 why the shooting right exactly [TS]

00:39:48 ◼   ► so i get i get a little bit of distance [TS]

00:39:50 ◼   ► from the forest line so that I can look [TS]

00:39:52 ◼   ► back at the forest and see what's coming [TS]

00:39:55 ◼   ► and 15 minutes half an hour later here [TS]

00:39:59 ◼   ► comes my friend Peter and he has the [TS]

00:40:04 ◼   ► shotgun and he's out of breath he's been [TS]

00:40:06 ◼   ► running like crazy and he says you know [TS]

00:40:11 ◼   ► you gotta come with me and we walked [TS]

00:40:16 ◼   ► back to the forest and we get back to [TS]

00:40:21 ◼   ► about halfway through the forest and he [TS]

00:40:25 ◼   ► shows me he describes that as he was [TS]

00:40:29 ◼   ► walking across the lake about halfway so [TS]

00:40:31 ◼   ► he he had timed his he had time leaving [TS]

00:40:34 ◼   ► the cabin [TS]

00:40:36 ◼   ► for half an hour after i had left the [TS]

00:40:38 ◼   ► cabin and as he was walking across the [TS]

00:40:40 ◼   ► lake he sees big huge brown bear tracks [TS]

00:40:44 ◼   ► that were walking perpendicular to my [TS]

00:40:48 ◼   ► snowshoe tracks and they stopped at my [TS]

00:40:51 ◼   ► snowshoe tracks and then turned and [TS]

00:40:53 ◼   ► followed my snowshoe tracks into the [TS]

00:40:55 ◼   ► forest and so Peter when he arrived at [TS]

00:40:59 ◼   ► this point where the bear the bear [TS]

00:41:02 ◼   ► connected with where you know my fresh [TS]

00:41:05 ◼   ► tracks and then turned and started [TS]

00:41:07 ◼   ► tracking me when Peter hit that point he [TS]

00:41:10 ◼   ► started shooting his gun in the air and [TS]

00:41:13 ◼   ► running toward me just like firing the [TS]

00:41:18 ◼   ► gun firing the gun and halfway through [TS]

00:41:19 ◼   ► the forest about the point about it [TS]

00:41:21 ◼   ► about the point in time where Peter [TS]

00:41:23 ◼   ► would have started shooting the bear [TS]

00:41:27 ◼   ► left his tracking of me and like went [TS]

00:41:31 ◼   ► off into the went off into the bushes [TS]

00:41:34 ◼   ► and all this was in the course of a half [TS]

00:41:36 ◼   ► an hour [TS]

00:41:36 ◼   ► God so anyway and so I mean I never saw [TS]

00:41:43 ◼   ► the better if Peter had been there but [TS]

00:41:45 ◼   ► he was like well you the bear was a was [TS]

00:41:47 ◼   ► you know they're barely and I'm hundred [TS]

00:41:49 ◼   ► yards behind me right there ass when [TS]

00:41:51 ◼   ► they need to write [TS]

00:41:52 ◼   ► oh yeah he wasn't he was you know what I [TS]

00:41:54 ◼   ► mean they could take it outright [TS]

00:41:55 ◼   ► innocent least in a straight line they [TS]

00:41:57 ◼   ► could outrun a person know for sure [TS]

00:41:59 ◼   ► everything is I was just do to do to do [TS]

00:42:02 ◼   ► product on it just like Jonna hey Jonna [TS]

00:42:05 ◼   ► know she's in the force think i would [TS]

00:42:07 ◼   ► not have heard the bear aware of the [TS]

00:42:10 ◼   ► bear the bear would have been behind me [TS]

00:42:12 ◼   ► and I and you know who knows to [TS]

00:42:17 ◼   ► speculate what the bear would have done [TS]

00:42:19 ◼   ► when he realized that he he wasn't just [TS]

00:42:22 ◼   ► tracking some chump when he saw me and [TS]

00:42:25 ◼   ► he realized that I was a a bear of a man [TS]

00:42:27 ◼   ► i think you still would have been [TS]

00:42:31 ◼   ► unimpressed [TS]

00:42:32 ◼   ► Danna and look up an uncanny sense of [TS]

00:42:35 ◼   ► smell right [TS]

00:42:36 ◼   ► yes they are they are they hunt by smell [TS]

00:42:41 ◼   ► well I mean the reason i am first of all [TS]

00:42:43 ◼   ► that's a fucking insane story John I [TS]

00:42:45 ◼   ► don't where I don't wear fragrance cells [TS]

00:42:47 ◼   ► and you don't you don't use a shaving [TS]

00:42:49 ◼   ► cream [TS]

00:42:50 ◼   ► right like the Vietcong right but so he [TS]

00:42:53 ◼   ► was but the bear [TS]

00:42:54 ◼   ► unlike the Vietcong the bear probably [TS]

00:42:57 ◼   ► knew a lot about me just from smelling [TS]

00:43:00 ◼   ► the air other like rangers second and [TS]

00:43:03 ◼   ► they can track [TS]

00:43:04 ◼   ► yeah he probably had he probably had my [TS]

00:43:06 ◼   ► number pretty good [TS]

00:43:08 ◼   ► well I'm you know we've got a little [TS]

00:43:09 ◼   ► just a just that in terms of my own [TS]

00:43:11 ◼   ► adventure stories usually done something [TS]

00:43:13 ◼   ► called car camping where you can fill up [TS]

00:43:15 ◼   ► your car and you take 10 steps and then [TS]

00:43:17 ◼   ► you put a tent down you have a a coleman [TS]

00:43:20 ◼   ► cooler [TS]

00:43:21 ◼   ► what's golden it's a pretty nice one [TS]

00:43:22 ◼   ► yeah it's nice got a gun but that they [TS]

00:43:26 ◼   ► are you know it's yeah way the gravy [TS]

00:43:28 ◼   ► California an epic site but they're real [TS]

00:43:31 ◼   ► super clear about making sure like no [TS]

00:43:32 ◼   ► seriously you really really need to use [TS]

00:43:35 ◼   ► the bear box this is this is not like a [TS]

00:43:38 ◼   ► funny like haha I'm use the tourists [TS]

00:43:40 ◼   ► there might be bears don't know they're [TS]

00:43:41 ◼   ► literally are bears here and they will [TS]

00:43:43 ◼   ► come to your campsite in it and like [TS]

00:43:45 ◼   ► they will smell your food and they will [TS]

00:43:47 ◼   ► smell everything it will smell your pee [TS]

00:43:49 ◼   ► and poo there was they will smell your [TS]

00:43:50 ◼   ► babies like keep the food in the bear [TS]

00:43:52 ◼   ► box and it sounds like the Bears I mean [TS]

00:43:54 ◼   ► there is a domesticated that's the wrong [TS]

00:43:56 ◼   ► word but they definitely ain't scared of [TS]

00:43:57 ◼   ► humans like they're in the California [TS]

00:44:00 ◼   ► car camping bears are not scared [TS]

00:44:03 ◼   ► yeah they're they're they're tending to [TS]

00:44:05 ◼   ► the season they're doing great but [TS]

00:44:08 ◼   ► nobody was true and I mean you would [TS]

00:44:10 ◼   ► just see them just moseying around and [TS]

00:44:12 ◼   ► and those are black bears I i'm not sure [TS]

00:44:17 ◼   ► if that's my ping-pong and lets get that [TS]

00:44:19 ◼   ► correct that is correct because the last [TS]

00:44:22 ◼   ► brown bear in california i think was [TS]

00:44:24 ◼   ► eradicated that there's a brown bear on [TS]

00:44:25 ◼   ► the California flag over the state flag [TS]

00:44:28 ◼   ► of California hasn't as a grizzly bear [TS]

00:44:30 ◼   ► on it there are no is that right [TS]

00:44:32 ◼   ► grizzly bears in California anymore huh [TS]

00:44:35 ◼   ► they were all killed out without bodies [TS]

00:44:37 ◼   ► LOL grounders black bears but no brown [TS]

00:44:41 ◼   ► bears and black bears are are much [TS]

00:44:46 ◼   ► smaller and much more [TS]

00:44:50 ◼   ► I mean I wouldn't i would run up to a [TS]

00:44:52 ◼   ► wild blackberry and huggett but they are [TS]

00:44:54 ◼   ► much more sort of Barry eating [TS]

00:44:58 ◼   ► they like a bowl of muesli and yogurt [TS]

00:45:01 ◼   ► they like to know that fresh air they [TS]

00:45:03 ◼   ► like to talk about their feelings Jewish [TS]

00:45:07 ◼   ► summer camp they like to rummage in the [TS]

00:45:09 ◼   ► in the in the footlocker looking for the [TS]

00:45:12 ◼   ► bug spray like they are they are a [TS]

00:45:14 ◼   ► gentler smaller kind of bear brown bear [TS]

00:45:19 ◼   ► is isn't a monster is our arzoo is [TS]

00:45:26 ◼   ► really bad and a lot of ways it's [TS]

00:45:29 ◼   ► interesting in its way I we should visit [TS]

00:45:31 ◼   ► there together [TS]

00:45:31 ◼   ► my daughter loves to go there it's a lot [TS]

00:45:33 ◼   ► of fun it's very poorly made it's kind [TS]

00:45:35 ◼   ► of like a mall and no matter where you [TS]

00:45:38 ◼   ► stand arzoo you feel like you're [TS]

00:45:39 ◼   ► standing in back of whatever you're [TS]

00:45:40 ◼   ► supposed to be looking at a place like [TS]

00:45:43 ◼   ► that we're like I always feel like I'm [TS]

00:45:44 ◼   ► in the wrong places coming at bottom of [TS]

00:45:46 ◼   ► the hill like there's nowhere to go we [TS]

00:45:47 ◼   ► don't feel like you're in the wrong [TS]

00:45:48 ◼   ► place [TS]

00:45:49 ◼   ► yeah and but for some reason I mean one [TS]

00:45:52 ◼   ► of those gosh it's one of those names [TS]

00:45:53 ◼   ► that you associate with lots of [TS]

00:45:55 ◼   ► philanthropy somebody threw a metric [TS]

00:45:57 ◼   ► shit ton of money at this grizzly bear [TS]

00:45:59 ◼   ► just chocolate was a hewlett could have [TS]

00:46:01 ◼   ► been the Packard's it could have been [TS]

00:46:02 ◼   ► the Goldbergs it could have been the [TS]

00:46:04 ◼   ► robert wood johnson i don't know but [TS]

00:46:07 ◼   ► there's a there's a very very spacious [TS]

00:46:10 ◼   ► though there's this one polar bear [TS]

00:46:11 ◼   ► there's one little sad polar bear and [TS]

00:46:13 ◼   ► what looks like a kiosk from the mall [TS]

00:46:15 ◼   ► and it's just sitting out there with the [TS]

00:46:17 ◼   ► fuckin grizzly bears man they have got [TS]

00:46:19 ◼   ► this entire giant area that includes [TS]

00:46:22 ◼   ► like you know one of those seaworld sort [TS]

00:46:25 ◼   ► of things where you can walk down and [TS]

00:46:26 ◼   ► look under the water and see them and go [TS]

00:46:29 ◼   ► to this different area to see them from [TS]

00:46:30 ◼   ► this different vantage point and I'm I [TS]

00:46:33 ◼   ► mean and what school is when you get a [TS]

00:46:34 ◼   ► little underground like the water area [TS]

00:46:37 ◼   ► they they put bear-sized footprints in [TS]

00:46:41 ◼   ► the concrete so you can see and you know [TS]

00:46:43 ◼   ► Eleanor like stop to walk on this and [TS]

00:46:45 ◼   ► they're like maybe a foot across but [TS]

00:46:47 ◼   ► they've got to be like at least like [TS]

00:46:49 ◼   ► eight inches across and then you see [TS]

00:46:51 ◼   ► these things just ambling around and [TS]

00:46:53 ◼   ► they think they look like a like a fat [TS]

00:46:55 ◼   ► man like a family used to do kung Fu's [TS]

00:46:57 ◼   ► had like three martinis but they're very [TS]

00:46:59 ◼   ► they're ambling do you know what i mean [TS]

00:47:02 ◼   ► but there's something about them were [TS]

00:47:03 ◼   ► just like a glancing blow not a fucking [TS]

00:47:05 ◼   ► tree down [TS]

00:47:06 ◼   ► just there's it's it's I mean that it's [TS]

00:47:10 ◼   ► it's weird I mean like it's their [TS]

00:47:12 ◼   ► prehistoric there's you have to have [TS]

00:47:15 ◼   ► that vibe they have that like I'm not [TS]

00:47:17 ◼   ► like Brachiosaurus but they've got that [TS]

00:47:18 ◼   ► kind of weird taper dinosaur neck [TS]

00:47:21 ◼   ► yeah their heads are are the size of an [TS]

00:47:23 ◼   ► armchair they're really and polar bears [TS]

00:47:26 ◼   ► are also enormous there was a polar not [TS]

00:47:29 ◼   ► ours is not ours looks like a recently [TS]

00:47:31 ◼   ► divorced man he's a sad guy it seems [TS]

00:47:34 ◼   ► every little there's a little uh this [TS]

00:47:36 ◼   ► little train you can track her down to [TS]

00:47:38 ◼   ► the zoo and you just you're right by the [TS]

00:47:40 ◼   ► polar bear and he just he just looks [TS]

00:47:42 ◼   ► like maybe returns calls its he sits up [TS]

00:47:45 ◼   ► on his hind I'm sits up on his heart and [TS]

00:47:47 ◼   ► his kind of waves one lonely and at the [TS]

00:47:49 ◼   ► train [TS]

00:47:50 ◼   ► ah there's a polar winter that one guy [TS]

00:47:53 ◼   ► your neighborhood on the lawn chair [TS]

00:47:54 ◼   ► it was like hi I'm a veteran there's a [TS]

00:47:57 ◼   ► polar bear at the Anchorage zoo for many [TS]

00:47:59 ◼   ► years whose name was binky binky the [TS]

00:48:03 ◼   ► polar bear and every once in a while [TS]

00:48:06 ◼   ► some drunk kid would scale the fence [TS]

00:48:12 ◼   ► this john hodgman know some drunks some [TS]

00:48:18 ◼   ► drunk Anchorage kid it was it was thing [TS]

00:48:19 ◼   ► that happened periodically some kid [TS]

00:48:22 ◼   ► would scale the fence to either be [TS]

00:48:25 ◼   ► taught the bear or on a dare or because [TS]

00:48:29 ◼   ► the bear seem to be sleeping or because [TS]

00:48:31 ◼   ► the bear was all what the bear was [TS]

00:48:33 ◼   ► sleeping all the way across the [TS]

00:48:35 ◼   ► enclosure or some other reason that some [TS]

00:48:41 ◼   ► kid thought it was a good idea to climb [TS]

00:48:43 ◼   ► the fence into the bear enclosure and [TS]

00:48:45 ◼   ► routinely binky would go from fully [TS]

00:48:49 ◼   ► asleep like balanced on a truck tire or [TS]

00:48:52 ◼   ► whatever it is that bears do in those [TS]

00:48:54 ◼   ► zoos like fully asleep 200 yards away [TS]

00:48:58 ◼   ► binky would go from like unconscious to [TS]

00:49:01 ◼   ► on this kid it in the blink of an eye on [TS]

00:49:06 ◼   ► one really one time he got a kid and the [TS]

00:49:11 ◼   ► newspapers reported it as delicately as [TS]

00:49:14 ◼   ► they could but the but the gist of it [TS]

00:49:18 ◼   ► was that binky had bit disk [TS]

00:49:20 ◼   ► stick off the kid the teenager made it [TS]

00:49:27 ◼   ► to the fans like an example of it he got [TS]

00:49:29 ◼   ► in there he got into the thing and being [TS]

00:49:31 ◼   ► you know binky was asleep all the way [TS]

00:49:32 ◼   ► over there and then all of a sudden [TS]

00:49:33 ◼   ► think he was not asleep anymore and [TS]

00:49:36 ◼   ► bakey is the size of a cup of a [TS]

00:49:37 ◼   ► locomotive and binky is coming at you [TS]

00:49:40 ◼   ► very fast and this kid this kid ran to [TS]

00:49:43 ◼   ► the fence and he you know he got he got [TS]

00:49:46 ◼   ► halfway up the wall and bakey just got [TS]

00:49:48 ◼   ► it right in the right in the back and [TS]

00:49:52 ◼   ► there's a there's a famous photo if you [TS]

00:49:55 ◼   ► want to google that a pinky carrying [TS]

00:49:58 ◼   ► this kids shoe around in his mouth [TS]

00:50:01 ◼   ► they couldn't get the shoe away from him [TS]

00:50:04 ◼   ► and for I don't know how long I think he [TS]

00:50:07 ◼   ► just was like my shoe now living if you [TS]

00:50:09 ◼   ► could be one of mounting on his wall and [TS]

00:50:11 ◼   ► he had this he had this nike this this [TS]

00:50:14 ◼   ► kids nike that he just like it was his [TS]

00:50:16 ◼   ► toy he just carried it around and the [TS]

00:50:19 ◼   ► zoo was mortified [TS]

00:50:20 ◼   ► it's not a thing that you want you know [TS]

00:50:22 ◼   ► what people coming to the zoo and seeing [TS]

00:50:25 ◼   ► your polar bear like proudly carrying [TS]

00:50:27 ◼   ► this kids shoe around in his mouth but [TS]

00:50:30 ◼   ► it's a fucking bear i did get away from [TS]

00:50:33 ◼   ► the guy it was like what do you expect [TS]

00:50:35 ◼   ► you know you wanted yeah i mean i think [TS]

00:50:37 ◼   ► they could have gone in with like a [TS]

00:50:38 ◼   ► chicken and tried to trade will give you [TS]

00:50:41 ◼   ► a chicken you give us the shoe but throw [TS]

00:50:43 ◼   ► me the whip [TS]

00:50:44 ◼   ► there's exhibitors be great there's a [TS]

00:50:46 ◼   ► great picture him with that you I think [TS]

00:50:48 ◼   ► you will [TS]

00:50:48 ◼   ► well you know what arzu it really is a [TS]

00:50:50 ◼   ► mess god bless them you know where [TS]

00:50:51 ◼   ► members there were part of the San [TS]

00:50:53 ◼   ► Francisco illogical society course you [TS]

00:50:55 ◼   ► are yeah which means to pay a hundred [TS]

00:50:56 ◼   ► dollars here to cause as much as we want [TS]

00:50:57 ◼   ► down but we super out back there [TS]

00:51:00 ◼   ► oh sure we do we we bring along a vegan [TS]

00:51:02 ◼   ► lunch we eat all of it we get we give [TS]

00:51:05 ◼   ► some way to a format we can support some [TS]

00:51:08 ◼   ► almond my milk out for your dead homie [TS]

00:51:10 ◼   ► that's funny [TS]

00:51:13 ◼   ► ah we have problems that are you i don't [TS]

00:51:17 ◼   ► remember nothing goes on a morning like [TS]

00:51:18 ◼   ► Christmas Day couple three years ago [TS]

00:51:21 ◼   ► like somebody some single somebody broke [TS]

00:51:24 ◼   ► into the zoo and got into the tiger area [TS]

00:51:27 ◼   ► the Tigers I think if memory serves yeah [TS]

00:51:30 ◼   ► yeah it did not turn out great [TS]

00:51:33 ◼   ► I arvizu lost its last it's elephant [TS]

00:51:38 ◼   ► credentials [TS]

00:51:40 ◼   ► whoa you know the elephants I think if [TS]

00:51:42 ◼   ► you ask anybody who's a zoo person [TS]

00:51:44 ◼   ► they'll tell you that one of the big [TS]

00:51:46 ◼   ► draws in the zoo world is having [TS]

00:51:49 ◼   ► elephants [TS]

00:51:50 ◼   ► yeah yeah everybody wants to see an [TS]

00:51:52 ◼   ► elephant it's not a zoo without an [TS]

00:51:53 ◼   ► elevator with drawers are our elephant [TS]

00:51:55 ◼   ► writes it took your elephant away [TS]

00:51:57 ◼   ► yeah i think i think an elephant at [TS]

00:51:59 ◼   ► least one elephant died at the zoo [TS]

00:52:01 ◼   ► no you can't you know just kind of [TS]

00:52:03 ◼   ► person that kind of spaced it there's a [TS]

00:52:05 ◼   ► lot that happens there we were kinda [TS]

00:52:07 ◼   ► like oh you know and meant to take care [TS]

00:52:09 ◼   ► of that thing like a lot of my getting [TS]

00:52:11 ◼   ► you wander around just empty displays is [TS]

00:52:13 ◼   ► very there's very apt thin looking [TS]

00:52:15 ◼   ► jungle cats is it's a it's a really [TS]

00:52:17 ◼   ► weird two-button to realize you're doing [TS]

00:52:20 ◼   ► great just for what it's worth I told [TS]

00:52:22 ◼   ► you about the elephant sanctuary right [TS]

00:52:23 ◼   ► now I don't think you have at some point [TS]

00:52:26 ◼   ► at some point I I don't know how I i [TS]

00:52:31 ◼   ► don't know i arrived at this I worry i [TS]

00:52:34 ◼   ► secretly working wonder how long we [TS]

00:52:36 ◼   ► really be able to do the show I don't [TS]

00:52:38 ◼   ► know and then then I realized that that [TS]

00:52:40 ◼   ► you literally have thousands of stories [TS]

00:52:43 ◼   ► that I assume true [TS]

00:52:46 ◼   ► this isn't a story this isn't a story [TS]

00:52:48 ◼   ► that involves me directly right but [TS]

00:52:50 ◼   ► somehow as I was [TS]

00:52:53 ◼   ► oh you know what it was I realized a [TS]

00:52:55 ◼   ► certain point five or six years ago I [TS]

00:52:58 ◼   ► was trying to make my was trying to be a [TS]

00:52:59 ◼   ► bachelor remember this I would i bought [TS]

00:53:01 ◼   ► a house is trying trying to be hip [TS]

00:53:03 ◼   ► bachelor guy i was going to get some [TS]

00:53:05 ◼   ► leather couches I was going to get a big [TS]

00:53:06 ◼   ► screen TV and I was gonna sit in my [TS]

00:53:09 ◼   ► house gonna wear a velvet smoking jacket [TS]

00:53:12 ◼   ► and I was gonna fill my house with art [TS]

00:53:13 ◼   ► sort of like a mini Hugh Hefner this was [TS]

00:53:17 ◼   ► my vision for Patrick payment patrick [TS]

00:53:20 ◼   ► bateman exactly and then I realized that [TS]

00:53:22 ◼   ► you're a man of means and i was at the [TS]

00:53:25 ◼   ► time [TS]

00:53:26 ◼   ► yeah and I Anna and then I realized very [TS]

00:53:29 ◼   ► quickly that I didn't want a leather [TS]

00:53:30 ◼   ► couch and that I had no use for a big TV [TS]

00:53:32 ◼   ► and then I was kind of at sea [TS]

00:53:34 ◼   ► nothing good ever happens on a leather [TS]

00:53:35 ◼   ► couch [TS]

00:53:36 ◼   ► nothing at all you're absolutely right i [TS]

00:53:38 ◼   ► did not need i did not need one more [TS]

00:53:41 ◼   ► place to sit and uncomfortably sweat but [TS]

00:53:45 ◼   ► I wanted to have my apart I wanted to [TS]

00:53:47 ◼   ► have my house filled with our you're in [TS]

00:53:48 ◼   ► my good friend Jason Finn the drummer of [TS]

00:53:51 ◼   ► the president of the united states of [TS]

00:53:52 ◼   ► america he has you would not believe [TS]

00:53:54 ◼   ► this but you would not believe looking [TS]

00:53:56 ◼   ► at him because he's a he's a terrible [TS]

00:53:59 ◼   ► person but he has this very very great [TS]

00:54:04 ◼   ► art collection that he has that he has [TS]

00:54:07 ◼   ► developed and curated a lot of people [TS]

00:54:10 ◼   ► with crazy eyes have nice art you know [TS]

00:54:12 ◼   ► you know like 25 years he's been [TS]

00:54:14 ◼   ► collecting art and he does these key [TS]

00:54:17 ◼   ► does these things where he goes to like [TS]

00:54:18 ◼   ► student art shows and he has developed [TS]

00:54:21 ◼   ► an eye enough that he buys this is on [TS]

00:54:23 ◼   ► the crazy eye for art he's got crazy eye [TS]

00:54:25 ◼   ► for art huh [TS]

00:54:26 ◼   ► and he you know he spends a hundred [TS]

00:54:28 ◼   ► bucks on a painting from a guy and five [TS]

00:54:30 ◼   ► years later everybody's talking about [TS]

00:54:31 ◼   ► the the painter and he's like yeah I got [TS]

00:54:34 ◼   ► that 400 bucks at an art show student [TS]

00:54:36 ◼   ► art show [TS]

00:54:36 ◼   ► you're just like what an asshole like [TS]

00:54:38 ◼   ► how dare you be successful at this but [TS]

00:54:41 ◼   ► anyway so Jason finn being a being a [TS]

00:54:43 ◼   ► model for me being being someone that I [TS]

00:54:45 ◼   ► that you know he's sort of a mentor [TS]

00:54:47 ◼   ► because he's older than I am i decided i [TS]

00:54:51 ◼   ► was going to get into this this was [TS]

00:54:53 ◼   ► going to get some art for my house art [TS]

00:54:55 ◼   ► that wasn't just like old posters of [TS]

00:54:58 ◼   ► topless girls that had been lacquered to [TS]

00:55:00 ◼   ► plywood again against getting outriders [TS]

00:55:03 ◼   ► you're gonna go beyond like having like [TS]

00:55:05 ◼   ► a like like a poster of clint's the kiss [TS]

00:55:08 ◼   ► on phone call or like really really [TS]

00:55:10 ◼   ► spread out right no more Dallas Cowboys [TS]

00:55:13 ◼   ► Cheerleader montage but like I earnest [TS]

00:55:16 ◼   ► outsider art kind of art or like [TS]

00:55:18 ◼   ► actually legitimate cool stuff [TS]

00:55:20 ◼   ► this was the thing like I happiness i [TS]

00:55:21 ◼   ► have an especially since the one that [TS]

00:55:23 ◼   ► has the room full of art you describe [TS]

00:55:25 ◼   ► that time Jason are you you're [TS]

00:55:28 ◼   ► describing something I mean you're up to [TS]

00:55:29 ◼   ► but you're describing a friend of yours [TS]

00:55:30 ◼   ► who like has has like sought out like [TS]

00:55:33 ◼   ► amazing like thrift store paintings that [TS]

00:55:36 ◼   ► are actually like no no no Jason [TS]

00:55:38 ◼   ► actually Jason issues [TS]

00:55:40 ◼   ► thrift stores he is a fancy boy guys are [TS]

00:55:42 ◼   ► here re he buys already are [TS]

00:55:44 ◼   ► yeah this isn't like found our this is [TS]

00:55:46 ◼   ► like art by artist [TS]

00:55:48 ◼   ► so I'm a spot you know I've got a house [TS]

00:55:50 ◼   ► full of thrift store art but i wanted to [TS]

00:55:52 ◼   ► get some art art and i'm looking around [TS]

00:55:55 ◼   ► and i don't know anything about it and [TS]

00:55:57 ◼   ► I'm looking at this is like that's that [TS]

00:55:58 ◼   ► thing is 1,500 bucks it's just a bit [TS]

00:56:01 ◼   ► just to like I've seen refrigerator [TS]

00:56:03 ◼   ► magnets that I like more than this thing [TS]

00:56:04 ◼   ► and I'm going to art galleries that and [TS]

00:56:07 ◼   ► I just don't I don't I don't feel it i [TS]

00:56:09 ◼   ► don't feel part of that culture and then [TS]

00:56:11 ◼   ► I learned that elephants make art that [TS]

00:56:17 ◼   ► they give elephants paint brushes and [TS]

00:56:21 ◼   ► then they sell those elephant paintings [TS]

00:56:24 ◼   ► to to pay for elephant chow that it's [TS]

00:56:30 ◼   ► some kind of thing where the elephants [TS]

00:56:32 ◼   ► are actually they're actually working [TS]

00:56:34 ◼   ► for their bowl of food [TS]

00:56:36 ◼   ► have you seen this actually happen yes [TS]

00:56:38 ◼   ► yes they give elephants paint brushes [TS]

00:56:40 ◼   ► and paint and the elephants love it [TS]

00:56:43 ◼   ► there's super excited and they express [TS]

00:56:47 ◼   ► themselves in paint and they do is like [TS]

00:56:50 ◼   ► kind of amazing paintings and i said i [TS]

00:56:54 ◼   ► do not care about student artists really [TS]

00:56:57 ◼   ► enough to pay 1600 dollars let alone [TS]

00:56:59 ◼   ► 20,000 students [TS]

00:57:02 ◼   ► yeah as long as a professional once [TS]

00:57:04 ◼   ► they're not students that they want real [TS]

00:57:06 ◼   ► money for their pain to this but [TS]

00:57:09 ◼   ► elephants [TS]

00:57:11 ◼   ► oh I will totally buy a painting for [TS]

00:57:13 ◼   ► from an elephant [TS]

00:57:14 ◼   ► so I go on and i'm looking at all the [TS]

00:57:17 ◼   ► elephant paintings and they're talking [TS]

00:57:19 ◼   ► about you know the then copy for these [TS]

00:57:23 ◼   ► other paintings is being written by some [TS]

00:57:25 ◼   ► elephant trainer not like an art curator [TS]

00:57:30 ◼   ► the elephant trainer so like Maisie was [TS]

00:57:32 ◼   ► so happy this day and she painted this [TS]

00:57:35 ◼   ► painting and you can see how happy she [TS]

00:57:37 ◼   ► is because she is so much yellow I'm [TS]

00:57:40 ◼   ► like that is a terrible description of [TS]

00:57:42 ◼   ► that painting and painting is saying a [TS]

00:57:45 ◼   ► lot more to me than that maze happy I'm [TS]

00:57:47 ◼   ► feeling amazing laying down i'm picking [TS]

00:57:50 ◼   ► up but she's laying down in this [TS]

00:57:51 ◼   ► painting but here's the problem we'll [TS]

00:57:53 ◼   ► just like when i got into Afghani war [TS]

00:57:56 ◼   ► rugs all the ones that i really liked [TS]

00:58:00 ◼   ► already have all [TS]

00:58:01 ◼   ► Afghani war rugs that had like had you [TS]

00:58:04 ◼   ► know mig-27 and then they were all sold [TS]

00:58:07 ◼   ► already and all the elephant paintings i [TS]

00:58:09 ◼   ► really like were sold and the the ones [TS]

00:58:13 ◼   ► that were still for sale were like all [TS]

00:58:14 ◼   ► these ones do you know all these brown [TS]

00:58:17 ◼   ► ones anyway so I followed that I [TS]

00:58:22 ◼   ► followed the elephant thread and i [TS]

00:58:23 ◼   ► discovered the elephant sanctuary which [TS]

00:58:26 ◼   ► is in Tennessee these people bought like [TS]

00:58:33 ◼   ► I'm like 50,000 acres of growing [TS]

00:58:37 ◼   ► tennessee hills and they take all these [TS]

00:58:41 ◼   ► elephants that have spent their whole [TS]

00:58:43 ◼   ► lives like little bit like working in [TS]

00:58:47 ◼   ► the circus and living in a living in a [TS]

00:58:49 ◼   ► tiny little cement room and get all [TS]

00:58:53 ◼   ► these elephants that were like chained [TS]

00:58:55 ◼   ► to a 6-foot length of chain and they [TS]

00:58:58 ◼   ► have permanent scars on their on their [TS]

00:59:01 ◼   ► little elephant wrists from 20 years [TS]

00:59:04 ◼   ► been chained to a floor [TS]

00:59:06 ◼   ► yeah all these elephants with [TS]

00:59:08 ◼   ► post-traumatic stress disorder all these [TS]

00:59:10 ◼   ► elephants who had their babies taken [TS]

00:59:12 ◼   ► away and had been it's like look at [TS]

00:59:15 ◼   ► child soldiers meats like Dumbo [TS]

00:59:17 ◼   ► yeah yeah exactly elephants who have [TS]

00:59:21 ◼   ► been traumatized and they are brought to [TS]

00:59:25 ◼   ► this elephant sanctuary and they're [TS]

00:59:26 ◼   ► turned loose to live out their lives [TS]

00:59:30 ◼   ► just just paint whatever they want just [TS]

00:59:33 ◼   ► frolicking in Tennessee which is [TS]

00:59:36 ◼   ► Tennessee as you know is the Africa of [TS]

00:59:39 ◼   ► America [TS]

00:59:40 ◼   ► haha at least the india of America [TS]

00:59:45 ◼   ► oh and you know they roll in the mud [TS]

00:59:52 ◼   ► they think they think you're lucky they [TS]

00:59:55 ◼   ► can't write a party with other elephants [TS]

00:59:58 ◼   ► thinking to know each other they like [TS]

00:59:58 ◼   ► thinking to know each other they like [TS]

01:00:00 ◼   ► they play slap and tickle are they do [TS]

01:00:02 ◼   ► whatever elephants do and it's this [TS]

01:00:05 ◼   ► great they're very social animals [TS]

01:00:07 ◼   ► they're very social and you know and of [TS]

01:00:10 ◼   ► course of course a lot of them are girl [TS]

01:00:12 ◼   ► elephant so there's some social I [TS]

01:00:14 ◼   ► there's some like you know there's a [TS]

01:00:16 ◼   ► tiny baby kind of thing that people only [TS]

01:00:19 ◼   ► want to adopt the the mail i think so i [TS]

01:00:22 ◼   ► think i think having a boy elephant is I [TS]

01:00:25 ◼   ► mean that they're a lot bigger and [TS]

01:00:26 ◼   ► they're a lot no meaner baby uh-huh [TS]

01:00:30 ◼   ► but you know I'm good said there that [TS]

01:00:32 ◼   ► their likes their their social so [TS]

01:00:34 ◼   ► somebody's going to somebody's going to [TS]

01:00:35 ◼   ► be honest resized and one of the [TS]

01:00:37 ◼   ► elephants is you know gonna be like but [TS]

01:00:40 ◼   ► that's how they do you got a lot of be [TS]

01:00:42 ◼   ► how they are you know you gotta let them [TS]

01:00:44 ◼   ► how to be how they do so anyway I'm a [TS]

01:00:47 ◼   ► big supporter of the elephant sanctuary [TS]

01:00:49 ◼   ► Tennessee and they go to their website [TS]

01:00:50 ◼   ► all the time and every time i see an [TS]

01:00:53 ◼   ► elephant that's in a zoo or that's doing [TS]

01:00:56 ◼   ► some work in the world unlike me [TS]

01:00:58 ◼   ► elephant sanctuary i whispered in there [TS]

01:01:02 ◼   ► and like just a lot sanctuary [TS]

01:01:04 ◼   ► you know I've always had our next-door [TS]

01:01:07 ◼   ► neighbor when I was in junior high [TS]

01:01:09 ◼   ► collected elephants and I realized on [TS]

01:01:11 ◼   ► others not what you know elephant [TS]

01:01:14 ◼   ► related things so I can collect the [TS]

01:01:17 ◼   ► animals it was going to say as elephant [TS]

01:01:19 ◼   ► collection tract housing but about it [TS]

01:01:22 ◼   ► out but I realize what a gift it is to [TS]

01:01:23 ◼   ► everyone in your life [TS]

01:01:25 ◼   ► we talked about this you know if you [TS]

01:01:26 ◼   ► have a collection like in your case [TS]

01:01:28 ◼   ► think about all the things if somebody [TS]

01:01:30 ◼   ► figured out how to reach you that they [TS]

01:01:31 ◼   ► could give you as a gift because they [TS]

01:01:33 ◼   ► know you like a brow playboy like a [TS]

01:01:35 ◼   ► cowboy hat you like a nice cant nice [TS]

01:01:39 ◼   ► breasts candelabra know that cheap stuff [TS]

01:01:42 ◼   ► that's right it's a gift you get you [TS]

01:01:44 ◼   ► give to your friends ratings i collect [TS]

01:01:46 ◼   ► rabe and I have any kind of birthday [TS]

01:01:48 ◼   ► party or any kind of house warming gift [TS]

01:01:50 ◼   ► you want to bring me ray bans oh I'm in [TS]

01:01:54 ◼   ► you're in [TS]

01:01:55 ◼   ► yeah but it but in her case you could [TS]

01:01:59 ◼   ► bring her an elephant it's because now I [TS]

01:02:01 ◼   ► mean you know the thing is it's it's you [TS]

01:02:03 ◼   ► always know so if you go somewhere if [TS]

01:02:06 ◼   ► you go to to gatlinburg which is in the [TS]

01:02:08 ◼   ► Africa of America you know that you can [TS]

01:02:10 ◼   ► get an elephant [TS]

01:02:11 ◼   ► thing and you give it to her and it's a [TS]

01:02:13 ◼   ► wonderful gift right now in your case it [TS]

01:02:15 ◼   ► sounds to me like you are like my agent [TS]

01:02:18 ◼   ► neighbor in pasco county florida you're [TS]

01:02:20 ◼   ► giving a gift to people you're saying if [TS]

01:02:22 ◼   ► you wanted to give me something it can't [TS]

01:02:25 ◼   ► be cheap and cheesy but give me some [TS]

01:02:27 ◼   ► nice elephant created art and that's [TS]

01:02:30 ◼   ► something that you could do for me [TS]

01:02:31 ◼   ► because it's missing you know what its [TS]

01:02:33 ◼   ► specific it's not going to be specific I [TS]

01:02:35 ◼   ► mean how many times when you're a kid [TS]

01:02:36 ◼   ► you get like the off-brand big gym or [TS]

01:02:39 ◼   ► something you know right exactly when my [TS]

01:02:41 ◼   ► mom brought me stay Diaz instead of [TS]

01:02:44 ◼   ► remember remember the iconic white [TS]

01:02:46 ◼   ► knight these with the blue stripe [TS]

01:02:48 ◼   ► yeah and then you remember the stadia [TS]

01:02:51 ◼   ► tennis shoes i remember there's a number [TS]

01:02:54 ◼   ► of ones what we're that where the swoosh [TS]

01:02:56 ◼   ► was was legally squared off the swoosh [TS]

01:03:00 ◼   ► are just a little too round and fruity [TS]

01:03:02 ◼   ► yeah it wasn't just that it was around [TS]

01:03:04 ◼   ► the swoosh was actually a whale [TS]

01:03:07 ◼   ► oh I do remember that the long showers i [TS]

01:03:10 ◼   ► had JC Penney's fake adidas with with [TS]

01:03:14 ◼   ► four stripes [TS]

01:03:15 ◼   ► oh yeah nice to see those kids a mile [TS]

01:03:20 ◼   ► away and I was the kid with the [TS]

01:03:21 ◼   ► stadium's my moms like those nikes [TS]

01:03:23 ◼   ► you're 80 bucks mine were a bluish [TS]

01:03:26 ◼   ► purple with orange stripes for orange [TS]

01:03:28 ◼   ► stripes [TS]

01:03:29 ◼   ► it's actually some kind of cool now the [TS]

01:03:31 ◼   ► yeah the competition I wish I had those [TS]

01:03:34 ◼   ► stadiums i wish i had all of mine [TS]

01:03:36 ◼   ► uh-huh i think i am very reluctant to [TS]

01:03:41 ◼   ► talk about this because i think i got [TS]

01:03:44 ◼   ► scammed recently by an animal artist and [TS]

01:03:49 ◼   ► I'm not real comfortable talking about [TS]

01:03:50 ◼   ► it but I got a bad feeling about this [TS]

01:03:52 ◼   ► like a lot of white people I heard a [TS]

01:03:54 ◼   ► thing on NPR about cheetah and cheetah [TS]

01:03:58 ◼   ► monkey [TS]

01:03:59 ◼   ► it's a champ John sorry chief cheetah [TS]

01:04:03 ◼   ► was the chimp from the Tarzan movies [TS]

01:04:04 ◼   ► right to you about this [TS]

01:04:06 ◼   ► well I know about cheating the gym from [TS]

01:04:08 ◼   ► the Tartan well long story short cheetah [TS]

01:04:11 ◼   ► you know chips get old people don't [TS]

01:04:13 ◼   ► realize this is really cute when the [TS]

01:04:15 ◼   ► runaround diapers when there are a few [TS]

01:04:16 ◼   ► months old but then they turn into like [TS]

01:04:18 ◼   ► you know basically imagine an insane [TS]

01:04:20 ◼   ► seen out [TS]

01:04:21 ◼   ► shit throwing five-year-old have fun for [TS]

01:04:23 ◼   ► 80 years right so you need to get a [TS]

01:04:25 ◼   ► cheap Elvis learn this right now let's [TS]

01:04:27 ◼   ► learn this with the with the with his [TS]

01:04:29 ◼   ► used to masturbate in front of guests he [TS]

01:04:31 ◼   ► thought that was funny you know it's [TS]

01:04:33 ◼   ► kind of funny from Tennessee imagine [TS]

01:04:35 ◼   ► being else's house and chips master [TS]

01:04:38 ◼   ► finishing that the child is getting [TS]

01:04:41 ◼   ► right in there with no chips will your [TS]

01:04:42 ◼   ► face yet all know know they'll tear all [TS]

01:04:44 ◼   ► kinds of stuff off there either ornery [TS]

01:04:47 ◼   ► and dad and you know and so anyway I [TS]

01:04:50 ◼   ► heard this thing that this part i'm [TS]

01:04:53 ◼   ► pretty sure is true which is that [TS]

01:04:55 ◼   ► cheetah was being and I'm not going to [TS]

01:04:57 ◼   ► google this pachita was now being cared [TS]

01:05:00 ◼   ► for at this sanctuary and look how cool [TS]

01:05:03 ◼   ► is that cheetah like I grew up like [TS]

01:05:05 ◼   ► watching you know this terrible terrible [TS]

01:05:06 ◼   ► Tarzan movies [TS]

01:05:07 ◼   ► how cool is it that up all those people [TS]

01:05:09 ◼   ► like cheetah of all this little people [TS]

01:05:12 ◼   ► is still alive Johnny wife's mother is [TS]

01:05:14 ◼   ► dead but love ya like so many Olympians [TS]

01:05:17 ◼   ► dead [TS]

01:05:18 ◼   ► I and the way that they were subsidizing [TS]

01:05:20 ◼   ► cheetahs keep was the cheetah did [TS]

01:05:25 ◼   ► paintings right for his cheating child [TS]

01:05:28 ◼   ► tell your dad is Jeter child so like a [TS]

01:05:32 ◼   ► lot of people i think i heard about this [TS]

01:05:33 ◼   ► on NPR by which i mean i'm positive i [TS]

01:05:36 ◼   ► heard about this on NPR up [TS]

01:05:38 ◼   ► I mean this guy's got the stink of all [TS]

01:05:40 ◼   ► things considered does it sure doesn't [TS]

01:05:42 ◼   ► hear the theme Robert Siegel [TS]

01:05:43 ◼   ► ding-ding-ding-ding bg2 paintings [TS]

01:05:48 ◼   ► paintings and it's i went to the went to [TS]

01:05:52 ◼   ► the site if memory serves I went to a [TS]

01:05:53 ◼   ► forum where I selected what colors I [TS]

01:05:56 ◼   ► would like cheated to use and I forget [TS]

01:05:58 ◼   ► how much I paid for it but we bought a [TS]

01:05:59 ◼   ► cheater painting now wait are you saying [TS]

01:06:01 ◼   ► that you not only bought a cheetah [TS]

01:06:03 ◼   ► painting but the you commissioned the [TS]

01:06:04 ◼   ► cheetah painting oh shit yeah it's in my [TS]