Ep. 42: "Your Hands Would Be Your Passport"

0:00:00hello hi John

0:00:06hi Marilyn that's going

0:00:10mmm-mmm-mmm still like yours better

0:00:16I've heard that in a while all bomb 20

0:00:23well I with John Roderick and he's on

0:00:28lunch today

0:00:31that's pretty good although i'm not sure

0:00:33like what the shit splat sound that will

0:00:36be the baby they are not John go John

0:00:40Roderick way two people loves is a new

0:00:44wave parodies with fart jokes

0:00:46mmm i just recently signed them to stop

0:00:49saying that no my god i got it just it's

0:00:52one of those jokes that nobody gets but

0:00:54us and once we're dead

0:00:55there will be no one left i can think of

0:00:57at least one and possibly two of our

0:00:59supposed listeners who I think will get

0:01:01they may not think it's funny but I'll

0:01:03get it

0:01:03you're right you're right i can think of

0:01:04at least one who will get it and think

0:01:06it's funny i selected his band name

0:01:08I know today is not it's not my python

0:01:12joke it's a yahoo the other is the music

0:01:14guy from the Rutles what's-his-name you

0:01:18know I mean Neil Innes illness it's

0:01:21annie lennox banjo right no one has been

0:01:23junk haha what is the catalog you know

0:01:29it's better you know it'll get a lot of

0:01:31people think a lot of people let's be

0:01:32honest a lot of a lot of people don't

0:01:34think though who you know what let's

0:01:36circle back to that a lot of people

0:01:37think Monty Python joke is pretty nerdy

0:01:39but I think Neil Innes joke is sublime

0:01:42it's very it's very deep like riddles

0:01:45that you ever see that rubble spooning

0:01:46it was the thing with the Reynolds who

0:01:48hey I i don't know about you but in this

0:01:52in the late seventies I got a lot of my

0:01:55early music from the the one-dollar LP

0:01:59rack who cut out that at the drugstore

0:02:02and you know my mom would go to the

0:02:05drugstore because she needed to buy some

0:02:07a sum like

0:02:10that rubbing alcohol and some band-aids

0:02:14and the drugstore was always a thing as

0:02:18a kid where I mean even now as an adult

0:02:21I walk into the drugstore I'm like what

0:02:22are all these Isles what what are all

0:02:24these things are they splints are people

0:02:26buying like like face masks and stuff

0:02:29here what why does the drugstore need so

0:02:31many hours I know you go to the

0:02:32drugstore all the time maybe you can

0:02:34help me with twice a day but so i would

0:02:36go to the drugstore and there was a big

0:02:37selection of of dollar LLP's and that's

0:02:41where i got Frank's at Frank Zappa's

0:02:44orchestral record as recorded by the

0:02:47London Philharmonic and that's where I

0:02:49cod a Neil Young and Crazy Horse's

0:02:53reactor a record i still listen to and

0:02:57that set that set quite comfortably next

0:03:00to the gene Simmons solo record for

0:03:01about forty two years that's right 99

0:03:03cents everyone you were never in your

0:03:05life never more than a quarter mile away

0:03:06from the cut copy of reactor yeah

0:03:08reactor still out there that's where i

0:03:11got Terrapin station by the Grateful

0:03:14Dead I think Machinehead by deep purple

0:03:17i found one time in the 99-cent rack so

0:03:21while my friends were buying foreign or

0:03:22four and Billy the Squires emotions in

0:03:27motion

0:03:28I was hopeless thing to machine head and

0:03:33reactor and wondering why I was out of

0:03:36step with my peers but one of the

0:03:38records that i bought at that on the

0:03:4099-cent racket that at the bartells

0:03:42drugs was the Rutles album which I

0:03:46thought from the you know a lot of these

0:03:49things i just bought because of the

0:03:51cover and walking ago I look so good

0:03:54yeah like you walk in there with a copy

0:03:56of trouser press you know you're gonna

0:03:58you're gonna take some chances and it's

0:03:59only a buck it's 1969 you know so i

0:04:03bought us about the rebels record and I

0:04:06mean I was at the at the beginning of

0:04:08what became a lifetime people's

0:04:10obsession

0:04:11and-and-and but you know what it was i

0:04:15discovered the Rutles before i

0:04:17discovered Monty Python wow that's weird

0:04:20i know so the rebels were

0:04:23the rebels were the gateway to monty

0:04:25python rather than the other way around

0:04:27and so nice Thai definitely struggled at

0:04:30first to understand every all the

0:04:34nuances it was it before you were really

0:04:36into the beatles I was getting into the

0:04:38beat so a lot of it must have seemed a

0:04:40little nuanced it was we know because

0:04:42until I was 10 years old my

0:04:44understanding of music was that count

0:04:47that count basie was a contemporary

0:04:48artist but however its innovative I

0:04:51can't do that if you're in Paris the

0:04:54only pop records that we had were eight

0:04:57track tapes and they were Jackson 5's

0:05:00greatest hits and a studio 54 a the

0:05:06disco compilation and I Simon and

0:05:11Garfunkel's bridge over troubled water

0:05:12and the beatles revolver those were the

0:05:13four pop 8-track tapes we had so up

0:05:19until I was ten like that was the only

0:05:22exposure i had to music that was not

0:05:24being played on a clarinet I my god

0:05:29that's brutal did you feel relieved

0:05:31well I had all that stuff memorized

0:05:33their nets in excess can be rough

0:05:35tell you what but it was it was when I

0:05:38was in fifth or sixth grade and started

0:05:39to meet those kids that that that that

0:05:43feathered their hair with a with a giant

0:05:46plastic comb that they carried in their

0:05:48back pocket that stuff like six inches

0:05:49of above their pants when I started to

0:05:52meet those kids that were a little bit

0:05:54rougher and they turned me onto the the

0:05:58radio basically they said you don't

0:06:00listen to the radio you know there was

0:06:02those the heyday of album-oriented rock

0:06:03and so they said you know you need to

0:06:06listen to what what was at the time in

0:06:08Anchorage 10 2.5 the the rock station

0:06:11and the the first this kid was over at

0:06:14my house and he's like I had my right

0:06:16and my radio i did i did have a clock

0:06:18radio but it was set to the station

0:06:20I think maybe my mom found a radio

0:06:23station when she put the group the clock

0:06:26in my room and it was just always on

0:06:28there i didn't i guess i didn't I was

0:06:30not one of those kids that looked at a

0:06:31radio and thought turn the knobs

0:06:34I was a kid that looked at the radio and

0:06:36went knobs and we eat just listen to

0:06:39whatever came on

0:06:40well so she turned to to the radio

0:06:42station that played like seals and

0:06:47Crofts and that was that was that era of

0:06:51of like what

0:06:53asia maybe a little bit priagent what

0:06:57was that what how would you describe

0:06:58that music like my yacht rock sort of

0:07:00like super soft drop ya damn and/or

0:07:04Christopher Cross Christopher Cross

0:07:06there was a period where there was a lot

0:07:07of very gentle so gentle so gentle it

0:07:10was like it was like petting a rabbit's

0:07:13vagina

0:07:16yeah now you could not have mentioned it

0:07:19that sounds really oddly appealing know

0:07:21what I mean like I find it so comforting

0:07:22rabbit and you're just like pad skipper

0:07:25habit to that the rabbits happy you're

0:07:27happy

0:07:28yeah and then this friend came over he

0:07:29that he was wearing his baseball hat on

0:07:32backwards before that was even a thing

0:07:33and he had a giant comb in his back

0:07:36pocket and feathered hair and a puka

0:07:38shell necklace he was like why you

0:07:39listening to this crap any tune he just

0:07:41wants obtain the radio and the first

0:07:44thing that came on i am the walrus

0:07:47oh ok on the radio on the radio and I

0:07:49was like what is this in seen music and

0:07:54he said are you kidding me it's the

0:07:55Beatles I thought that first time I

0:07:57heard that I thought it was so scary

0:07:59it was totally terrifying particularly

0:08:01since I thought I understood the beatles

0:08:03I've been listening to revolver I got

0:08:05that was one of you knows one of my

0:08:07favorite records right up there with you

0:08:09know Count Basie's jumping at the

0:08:11Woodside and and this this music comes

0:08:15on the scene scene music and I just

0:08:18stared at the radio like I'm

0:08:20comprehending and and and completely it

0:08:23just transformed me in and in a moment

0:08:25you know just as it just as it would

0:08:28have done to somebody 10 years earlier

0:08:30in 1968 this is 1978 and I was like mind

0:08:37blown

0:08:38instantly blow

0:08:40so they make you to make you curious for

0:08:42more well yeah then I immediately went

0:08:44and you could you could talk about you

0:08:47talk about the Blue Album you could get

0:08:49the blue album and the red album also at

0:08:52the drugstore that those were 599 those

0:08:55were not one dollar records that was

0:08:57that was a pricier but it was a double

0:08:59album and i bought them immediately and

0:09:03then I was basically all I listen to you

0:09:07until you know my first my first

0:09:09teaching those albums which you know I

0:09:11knew there was at my cousins were five

0:09:13and ten years older than me and so

0:09:15they're really into the beatles and

0:09:17enjoyed this is never touch you

0:09:18inappropriately not not to my mind I was

0:09:21that it was all appropriate far as I was

0:09:23concerned was a good good i'm gonna say

0:09:25that's how it is in your family

0:09:26ok so that's how it is in there was a

0:09:30ferris bueller that's a little Ferris

0:09:32Bueller reference for some of the sort

0:09:34of young people remember her knees roush

0:09:37the female lead the girl belongs here

0:09:42and off

0:09:42yes everybody's she had one really cute

0:09:46knees i have to say that admit we may

0:09:49have discussed Susanna Hoffs earlier in

0:09:50the back in episode which ID gentleman

0:09:53about it but I felt I always felt like a

0:09:56like Sloan she just wasn't my type she's

0:10:00too skinny

0:10:00oh my god she was like she wasn't my

0:10:03type because she was unattainable she's

0:10:05very cute i have to admit it mentioned

0:10:08in my ad Diane Court pile here like the

0:10:11girl from The Wonder Years

0:10:12oh well Whitney with me you know she has

0:10:16math things that she teaches kids math

0:10:18sections asking that she doesn't mapping

0:10:20google any sexy math I i will not only

0:10:25am I gonna try googling I'm gonna put it

0:10:26in my broom my menu bar i'm gonna put on

0:10:29my special place might my cousins have

0:10:31been really into the beatles they had

0:10:32never and remember this bed on the floor

0:10:35idioms it there Ohioans oh no one in

0:10:38Florida listen to the beatles right now

0:10:40but used to be back in the day so my

0:10:42cousin my eldest cousin is 10 years

0:10:45older than me i had an original copy of

0:10:47the white album with serial number and

0:10:48everything and he had the forefoot

0:10:50working with the four photographs of

0:10:52then I like onyx photographs on his door

0:10:54so you know I've been around the

0:10:55Whitehall looks like a milk cow

0:10:58well I think that's maybe one of the

0:10:59classic john lennon pictures i mean he

0:11:01he just looks so John Lennon it is but

0:11:04you know I I hate that look on John you

0:11:07don't like always get along here I'm a

0:11:08sergeant pepper John guy everything from

0:11:12everything from rubber sole to sergeant

0:11:14pepper I think he looks amazing and then

0:11:16he started growing his hair long he just

0:11:18looks like Williams photographs when

0:11:19they're recording rubber soul especially

0:11:21revolver and Paul had the glasses

0:11:23no she has man they are they are up

0:11:26there they're like Chet Baker buddy

0:11:27holly like they're up there in the wow

0:11:29you guys look so cool and you have no

0:11:31idea so cool no idea how cool you look

0:11:33well this is the thing about the fifties

0:11:35and sixties and connect to my records

0:11:37were done

0:11:38yes you can just go ahead and it's very

0:11:40unusual that you are the one who wants

0:11:42to return to a story there are stairs

0:11:43there's a ceiling I've tried to tell

0:11:45three times before finally going to get

0:11:46out today but we're three by five card

0:11:48here i'm going to write it down we're

0:11:50gonna circle back to that and if it's if

0:11:52it's bad I can't i'll cut it out up in

0:11:57any case any good haha in the fifties

0:12:03and sixties they changed car designs

0:12:07every year they changed the the fashion

0:12:12but like the men's and women's clothing

0:12:14fashion designers had a slide rule in

0:12:16their pocket every year they and for a

0:12:19period of 20 years every year they they

0:12:22designed a brand-new car and brand new

0:12:24clothes and brand-new everything for for

0:12:26the for for a year and that some of the

0:12:31best designer in in history some of the

0:12:33best Americans industrial design every

0:12:36one of those years now you know the

0:12:38chrysler sebring has been in production

0:12:40since 1989 and all they do is change the

0:12:43air freshener and the that you don't

0:12:46like right they don't even change the GT

0:12:49cars from 5256 and 59 and i'll bet you

0:12:53could eyeball with in like a year like

0:12:56what your that came out without you take

0:12:58night 92 and 96 and 99 forget it now I

0:13:02mean they look like tylenol

0:13:03when it went in 1985 if you had a 15

0:13:07year old car from 1970 right now think

0:13:13about that Vietnam experience they had

0:13:15an ltd it was really hard to tell or

0:13:17continental it was hard to tell how old

0:13:19that was because I mean buicks and old

0:13:23all those kinds of cars that my mom had

0:13:25an early eighties car that look pretty

0:13:27much like a smaller version of a car

0:13:29from making 73

0:13:30well yeah that started have that started

0:13:32happening in the mid-seventies but I

0:13:34mean a big guy like me i can tell you

0:13:36the model year of every American car

0:13:38from 85 to 92 64 65 Mustang absolutely i

0:13:43can see it from across the street

0:13:44contrast the grill because the little

0:13:47doesn't think the guy at the hexagon

0:13:48versus the rectangular grill had a

0:13:51friend with a 60 64 and half mustang

0:13:53with pony interior

0:13:54i SAT an argument voices run across the

0:13:57seat John that's very nice i already

0:14:00argued with a Danish guy one time about

0:14:02the headlight surrounds on a 65 cadillac

0:14:05seville versus a 66 cattle and I guess

0:14:09that this is a man it was intimidating a

0:14:12dane dane it's very similar to when you

0:14:15when you when you start a story by

0:14:16saying i was at the model train store

0:14:18that you don't have to specify your talk

0:14:21okay

0:14:22who is that the dungeon dice Waterhouse

0:14:24was it was the model train store and

0:14:26just talking to somebody always a guy I

0:14:28was that I was it a steely dan meetup

0:14:30haha but anyway yes there's gas in the

0:14:33car

0:14:34it's 2012 right now could you I mean

0:14:38legitimately if you saw a car from 1997

0:14:42would you be able to even place it

0:14:44within 10 years of when it was built now

0:14:46and i think i started i think there's

0:14:48always a five-year what the fuck period

0:14:50around most cars and I remember this

0:14:51starting do you remember when the

0:14:53fucked-up Thunderbirds came out about

0:14:558345 and this is a little cancel it is

0:14:58taking that you call them the fucked-up

0:15:00Thunderbirds because hate him

0:15:02there were so many people who thought

0:15:04that would mean that the federal bird

0:15:05was the first the first pregnant

0:15:08porpoise who it was that it was the

0:15:11moment when the cars in America went

0:15:12from being a shoe box on top of the shoe

0:15:14box

0:15:15to being around you like a like a beluga

0:15:18whale pumping in the American cars and

0:15:21internet the the Nissan's the Toyotas

0:15:24started the back over there is one car

0:15:25and underground where it looked like an

0:15:27ATM machine or our night deposit every

0:15:29word or a doorstop something you'd kick

0:15:31precisely japanese or stopped up you

0:15:35have to get think i had to go pink phone

0:15:36for just a minute to take surprised

0:15:37they're very surprisingly but then think

0:15:39about the thing about the way the music

0:15:40and the culture change between 1960 in

0:15:421970 and and think about how the music

0:15:45and culture has not changed between 2002

0:15:49and 2012 nights it's staggering I mean

0:15:51this is such a cliche but it's still

0:15:53just in my head all the time if you take

0:15:55the whatever major label period of the

0:15:57beatles it's 1963 to 1970 which is like

0:16:022005 till now right which is basically

0:16:06the amount of time it's been since I

0:16:07last recorded an album is a good record

0:16:10my entire that the entire beatles career

0:16:13could be fit into the time between the

0:16:15labrum from please please me to let it

0:16:18be

0:16:18well technically to be right technically

0:16:20later right

0:16:22it was it was it was didn't record let

0:16:24it be first they did but you know it's

0:16:27all they were done by I think that

0:16:28canonical can't let it be you don't

0:16:31count let it be

0:16:32put it on a card put a bird on it i

0:16:34heard i was driving on the on the road

0:16:36the other day listening to the radio

0:16:38really and you lose up that I thought

0:16:42you didn't do that I don't know i'll do

0:16:44it sometimes and a tune from let it be

0:16:47naked that caused so much better

0:16:50well better accept

0:16:54except it's basically star wars without

0:16:58the soundtrack starts it's basically

0:17:00hand shooting second let you know yeah

0:17:04you know quickly save this this is a big

0:17:07show you know what we're going to do the

0:17:08paul mccartney show i will give you one

0:17:10track from that record that is

0:17:12surprisingly astoundingly better i think

0:17:14you know the song ever there's one song

0:17:16on there that nobody in the band was

0:17:19matter about them especially Paul than

0:17:20one particular song because it's so

0:17:22fucking over-the-top but if you go back

0:17:24into this long when you read which I

0:17:27love the films but i love that respect

0:17:30it's coming now if you go back and

0:17:31listen the original it's like listen to

0:17:33Paul play yesterday or something if I

0:17:34heard that one first

0:17:36sure i would go on my god i get you

0:17:38think about yesterday in fact it's so

0:17:39unadorned yes is so perfect but you know

0:17:43now when I go back I'm in my head I'm

0:17:45going bump bump bump bump absolutely i'm

0:17:49adding strings in my head I don't care

0:17:51ok on base like to not have that in

0:17:55there is like yeah okay playing your

0:17:57fucking demos yeah okay I but to your

0:18:00point okay so I there was a thing I

0:18:03think it came on the I think it came

0:18:06with the AH the stupid nineties whatever

0:18:11when they put out the lose everything

0:18:12else we had that you stop pirating by

0:18:14this but there was a little maybe it was

0:18:16maybe it was on the PBS thing but there

0:18:18are these little featurettes they were

0:18:19kind of annoying but they were little

0:18:21like motion graphic featurettes for each

0:18:23record there were like 10 minutes long

0:18:25and I could watch the 14 revolver over

0:18:27and over just because Paul look so

0:18:29fucking cool and just because you've

0:18:31never heard the altar i think i sent you

0:18:33this

0:18:33you heard the two alternate takes well

0:18:35there's one an alternative and your bird

0:18:36can sing with and without background

0:18:39vocals never heard it i use them it's

0:18:42really different but you can hear is one

0:18:44take when they're trying to add

0:18:45harmonies to it and they're so high and

0:18:49all they do they cackled with laughter

0:18:51John and Paul cackle with laughter

0:18:53through the entire take completely

0:18:55freely and I swear to God I get sad and

0:18:58happy and set every time I listen to it

0:18:59like a happy because it's so awesome to

0:19:02hear these guys having fun and it's so

0:19:04set because you realize there may be

0:19:06three more times that

0:19:07we're in a room together and didn't want

0:19:08to fucking kill each other John was so

0:19:10unhappy

0:19:10yeah but there's I and laughing

0:19:13recording one of my all-time favorite

0:19:14song I just think that song is

0:19:15astounding

0:19:16it's great and I i frankly I have a

0:19:18videotape of me in nineteen who wouldn't

0:19:22be 1989 trapped in a bathroom at my drug

0:19:28dealers house with another friend and

0:19:31his cockatiel didn't try to make out

0:19:35with you

0:19:36no no this was different you really

0:19:37understand your second 89 and you're

0:19:40trapped in a bathroom with a cockatiel

0:19:42not strapped but somehow trapped inside

0:19:44you can't get out the UN the birds just

0:19:46as stuck as you are oh it wasn't that I

0:19:48wasn't that I was trapped but that but

0:19:50rather that I had trapped the bird in

0:19:52the bathroom

0:19:53we were we were we were there where's

0:19:56your self and he was he was it was one

0:19:58of those it was like right after the

0:19:59harvest and the whole every flat surface

0:20:01in the house was covered with marijuana

0:20:03they were sorting it and clipping it and

0:20:06drying it and doing it all the stuff

0:20:07that you do when you have a big harvest

0:20:09of marijuana and we were there and we

0:20:12were so incredibly stoned at a certain

0:20:18point and then and of course he's a drug

0:20:20dealer right so he has birds

0:20:22yeah yeah we get drunk times you have a

0:20:24snake or a popular pig or a a tarantula

0:20:28or something like that he had a cocktail

0:20:30and the bird was just flying freely

0:20:33through the house calling Bob Marley

0:20:34haha haha

0:20:38it is a great bird at a certain point

0:20:41I'm very stoned and I start trying to

0:20:43catch I want to get the bird and so I'm

0:20:46walking around the house of the birds

0:20:47can't stay away from me like hopping

0:20:49from the lamp to the table and I'm like

0:20:51I gotta get the bird is he clipped well

0:20:54no so so at a certain point like I'm

0:20:57gonna get this bird and the bird figures

0:20:59out that it's not going to be enough to

0:21:02just go from lamp the lamp and he starts

0:21:03to fly and then he's flying around this

0:21:06apartment and I'm running after him like

0:21:08falling over the the couches and my

0:21:10friend joins the chase and the bird goes

0:21:13in the bathroom and and and purchase on

0:21:14the shower curtain rod and I go in there

0:21:17and my friend goes in there my friend

0:21:18has his video camera

0:21:20and.and I shut the door because I'm

0:21:22trying to keep the bird i want to get

0:21:24the bird not not to do anything bad to

0:21:26and I just want to pet the burn

0:21:28I just want to say i just want to see

0:21:29the bird and we're in the bathroom and

0:21:32the bird is like oh shit I did the wrong

0:21:34thing coming in here now I'm trapped in

0:21:37this bathroom and I'm trying to get it

0:21:40and he starts on he starts flying around

0:21:42this bathroom which is you know eight by

0:21:45eight and i'm falling into the tub and I

0:21:48grabbed the shower curtain and pull the

0:21:50rod and the curtain down on top of

0:21:51myself and the shower goes on and the

0:21:54bird is flying in circles squawking

0:21:56we're all week none of us can breathe me

0:21:59the friend or the bird because we're all

0:22:01so high it's the funniest thing that

0:22:04ever happened and the fact that i have

0:22:06that videotape not a thing I would ever

0:22:08show to anyone in the world I can't even

0:22:10believe I'm describing it but i never

0:22:14have to smoke pot again because i have

0:22:17that moment recorded that is as high as

0:22:21you ever need to be and if I want if I

0:22:26ever feel like I need to get higher feel

0:22:27like I want to feel what it's like to be

0:22:29high

0:22:29I'm just watch that did you know that's

0:22:32right did you see here i am I to infer

0:22:34hear that she serenaded the bird with a

0:22:35paul mccartney song i know i think at

0:22:39that point it was where every 180 but

0:22:42you didn't you and your bird can sing to

0:22:43the bird know everyone at that party was

0:22:45on a strict led zeppelin diet at that

0:22:46point who I the bird included so no I

0:22:50think if I think the battle of evermore

0:22:52was probably playing with loud and

0:22:55eventually the door somebody opened the

0:22:57door and the bird got out and I was in

0:22:59the bathtub covered with shower curtain

0:23:01with the honor thought it was the

0:23:03greatest the greatest moment of my life

0:23:05it might have been it might have been

0:23:08right at I want a peek right then and

0:23:11the rest is just been a 0 an arduous

0:23:15slog a long slog in a brown advil long

0:23:19and winding slong anyway who what I want

0:23:22to talk about right now is your cousins

0:23:25ok talking about the Beatles i was just

0:23:28all I was gonna say was and now it's

0:23:31it's it's less impactful as we used to

0:23:33say office phone number

0:23:34well no I I you know whenever I would go

0:23:37to the mall i like my mom when I would

0:23:40go to the mall because I didn't have a

0:23:42car or anything it's just the mall

0:23:44manager videos but i was thirteen

0:23:46fourteen fifteen sixteen go to the mall

0:23:48Oh what about 16 17 18 25 talking to the

0:23:52mall with your mom you know what you

0:23:54like the chick-fil-a together with she

0:23:56would she buy you some kettle corn

0:23:58maiden have kettle corn in up but she

0:24:01put would you buy you a orange julius

0:24:03try orange julius like a feather rub

0:24:05clip earring now I'd say that my mom

0:24:07can't borrow five dollars and of course

0:24:09I would never pay it back bar because

0:24:11you want to take one for your parents

0:24:12you always ask if you borrow it right

0:24:13there was no never never paid their

0:24:16parents back anything ever

0:24:18I didn't I once asked my dad if I could

0:24:20borrow some money to buy a man it's like

0:24:22instead borrow I was like yeah borrow

0:24:26you've never borrowed it sounds like

0:24:28you're gonna make me say it tomorrow

0:24:31hey guys I only one is a van and a

0:24:34little bit of dignity

0:24:35yeah i'm gonna make me say give me the

0:24:37money on borrowing it had taken out of

0:24:40your allowance about but yeah i would

0:24:42really go to Annie know and and what I

0:24:45think we've talked about this at length

0:24:46but you know when when you're don't have

0:24:48a lot of dell any buying records you

0:24:49don't have that many chances you do a

0:24:51lot of research and and stuff but I

0:24:53can't go to other people just go to the

0:24:55drugstore and buy the one getting to

0:24:57that well so we would i would go to

0:24:58record bar and Camelot because those are

0:25:00the two stores and flip it through all

0:25:02the albums but let me tell you what I

0:25:04with three dollars less than it usually

0:25:06costs as you say my first appeals albums

0:25:09because i estimate with the white album

0:25:11and so I and until like probably college

0:25:14I still refer to it as the red album is

0:25:16them in the blue album sure which are

0:25:18those for those of you who don't know

0:25:19shame on you but I was the Beatles

0:25:21greatest hits up to about paperback

0:25:25writer is a double album of right up to

0:25:28like the break like paperback writer and

0:25:30everything changed and well I guess some

0:25:33people would say

0:25:35I'll show us what the gringo drumbeat

0:25:38single 0 for tomorrow never knows now

0:25:42the one with the big single where I

0:25:44important matter anyhow the first room

0:25:48mmm the best wrinkle beat ever i think

0:25:50might be rain team interesting it's

0:25:54really colorful now you know the song i

0:25:57mean the the John song for when you

0:26:00still writing good songs and we're

0:26:01talking about the Beatles on this

0:26:03podcast so we're doing anyway I from my

0:26:06mom and I went to a person's and that's

0:26:07right mr. biome elves the end my god I'm

0:26:11glad I don't date you

0:26:12haha just so many levels is the shirts

0:26:16is the birds

0:26:17yeah it's the bells as the candles

0:26:19that's my favorite him know that movies

0:26:21with the bells in the candles

0:26:23there's a lot of doesn't sell can do all

0:26:25the things you treasure there are a lot

0:26:28of reasons that everyone who used to

0:26:30Damien doesn't now is glad that they

0:26:33don't date me now but there's a little

0:26:35but there's a little taste of melancholy

0:26:37and that's not to get herb alpert making

0:26:4078 I come home from school

0:26:42there is an innocuous looking a thick

0:26:44album shaped box on my doorstep you're

0:26:4616 at this point I was 11 and I picked

0:26:53up picked it up and went inside

0:26:54yeah and it's album shape walk walk my

0:26:56dog and it was from RCA when you left

0:27:01the box unopened and walk your dog came

0:27:04inside so to speak and I walk my dog

0:27:06whatever point being there's a box I

0:27:08open this up its it gets sent to the

0:27:11wrong person that you do you open up

0:27:13other people's stuff right

0:27:15oh I don't do that and it was somebody's

0:27:18like six for a penny box of RCA joining

0:27:22up records and this is a business became

0:27:26a very important day for me when I tried

0:27:28to explain this data for many many years

0:27:30know that long be and 1878 some of the

0:27:35age so what would have been best of the

0:27:37Beach Boys Frampton Comes Alive kiss

0:27:38destroyer and rock and roll over the

0:27:40monkeys greatest hits and the best of

0:27:42Dolly Parton

0:27:43people oh oh my god that explains this

0:27:46time a guy this is that this point i

0:27:49owned the star wars soundtrack write the

0:27:51story of Star Wars write an entire now

0:27:55my mother and father had been were

0:27:57veterans of the RCA music club so we

0:27:58also had five thousand eight tracks of

0:28:01mantovani and Percy Faith uh-huh ok

0:28:03check off the easy listening boxer Roger

0:28:05Whittaker any of that ship was already

0:28:08hitting hard the term or her for her

0:28:13sure yeah he's good Whistler you know he

0:28:17started out as a whistle like slim

0:28:18whitman he was slim slim yodeled and i

0:28:20whistled and I believe he whistled and

0:28:22Roger Whittaker was primarily a Whistler

0:28:24you know i'm i'm actually not a bad

0:28:25Whistler beer to throw please continue

0:28:30that was very again very popular in the

0:28:32cross the Christopher Cross period the

0:28:33the reformed America period right right

0:28:36right well you know i was listening to

0:28:37some of my dental records the other day

0:28:39and I and we're really looking forward

0:28:42to the to the vocal style the male vocal

0:28:45style of Who coming back because that

0:28:50the tremulous crude about like really

0:28:53like old like dancing your stuff and

0:28:56yeah it is it's such an unappealing

0:28:59vocal style I cannot believe

0:29:01well it explains why so much of the big

0:29:03band music was instrumental

0:29:05because when somebody started to sing

0:29:07maybe in the swing era but in the big

0:29:09band era there were some really mr.

0:29:11Sinatra started you know it was a Tommy

0:29:13Dorsey and there was a lot of apparently

0:29:16I'm your father-in-law where you're

0:29:18explaining to me where Sinatra got to

0:29:19start let me get a fucking three by five

0:29:21card here

0:29:22oh you tell me you know more about Frank

0:29:23Sinatra let me write this down

0:29:25Merlin knows about Frank Sinatra Tommy

0:29:28Dorsey in any case so I commit so here's

0:29:32the thing again you should understand

0:29:34that at this point I don't own a lot of

0:29:37LPS I going to have mostly remember uh

0:29:39was called you have sesame street fever

0:29:41no time this is the nineteen seventies

0:29:43what the fuck you talking about i had

0:29:46show-and-tell had a show-and-tell

0:29:47remember show-and-tell you get it was

0:29:50kind of like a an audio-visual version

0:29:52of like a few master you got this little

0:29:54thing had a little

0:29:55screen and required yeah you mean like a

0:29:58little slide show you learn about having

0:29:59Hillary or whatever i'm sure i don't

0:30:01think i had 1i think of friend had one

0:30:03that's what i play my records on to

0:30:05understand seriously like for Christmas

0:30:07in 1977 i want to say I was a Star Wars

0:30:11Christmas you know i got like I got the

0:30:13soundtrack

0:30:14that's the records that i had then I

0:30:15came home and there was six well

0:30:17together

0:30:17discounting is Dolly Parton six rocket

0:30:20rockers only record yeah i mean i know

0:30:22you know giant kiss fan but with the

0:30:24imagine being 11 and getting to suddenly

0:30:25go to kiss records

0:30:27well i heard of an eleven-year-old boy

0:30:29in Florida is absolutely ohio ohio right

0:30:33then listen to kissimmee florida uh that

0:30:35is that is right in kisses we'll have to

0:30:39chill in particular I mean I was kind of

0:30:41scared of kiss even though i have

0:30:42friends that were in to kiss i still

0:30:44thought they were kind of scary the

0:30:45blockheads certain service you know it's

0:30:48true i wasn't nights

0:30:50they're all the kids in st. service at

0:30:52all that's even better that's so much

0:30:53better

0:30:54good service rawr but there are two in

0:30:57particular I mean I was familiar now in

0:30:59your case like you're talking about the

0:31:00clock radio is just listen am radio all

0:31:02day long I mean I knew every song but

0:31:04like them and i watch The Monkees of

0:31:06course so the monkeys greatest hits and

0:31:08the best of the Beach Boys which is a

0:31:09really good best of but those two in

0:31:11particular like I just I would just play

0:31:13those first comes alive even it wasn't

0:31:15that into it because you know what it's

0:31:17not that good it's arguably one of the

0:31:18most overrated records of all time I

0:31:20think close to if not the most overrated

0:31:23records that you do go get your copy a

0:31:25friend comes alive could trade it for a

0:31:27copy of odyssey in oracle everything

0:31:29will change everything will change but

0:31:30what people like about frampton comes

0:31:32alive is that it sounds like the smell

0:31:36of marijuana

0:31:37yeah you know exactly what sounds like a

0:31:40one-hitter I think people should trade

0:31:42their frampton comes alive for a Judas

0:31:46Priest's live album unleashed in the

0:31:48East that the one with the long green

0:31:50manalishi sell up

0:31:51yes yeah now unleashed in the East is

0:31:54going to take you if your little if you

0:31:56are not a Judas Priest fan or you are

0:31:58like a um ambivalent to Judas Priest

0:32:01anyway if you listen to unleash in the

0:32:04East which is one of those live albums

0:32:06which is arguably just a bunch of

0:32:08overdubs right over the sound gets

0:32:11inspired a lot of people people people

0:32:13screaming in in Japanese if you don't

0:32:15mind I don't mind this sound for 46

0:32:17minutes

0:32:19yeah it sounds like somebody left a

0:32:23steam valve open

0:32:24it's either but this album is it is

0:32:26absolutely phenomenal crying now knows

0:32:30that it said this is when he still had

0:32:31hair and stuff right that's but this is

0:32:32before British steel right

0:32:34yes it is and it's and it's effectively

0:32:36a greatest hits of Judas Priest up to

0:32:39nineteen seventy-nine or whatever came

0:32:42and you all those albums that just

0:32:46priest in the early to mid seventies

0:32:47they were all concept albums they all

0:32:49had like side to was just one giant song

0:32:52and six movements and watching old

0:32:53videos of him when he had like his bald

0:32:55head long hair when you look like The

0:32:57Rocky Horror guy like the idea were much

0:33:00closer to prague in a lot of these

0:33:02efforts

0:33:03absolutely they were made they were like

0:33:04coming out coming out from Queen rocky

0:33:08horror very much but Michael didn't meet

0:33:12again no real singles it wasn't until

0:33:14the new wave of British heavy metal that

0:33:16people understood what heavy metal

0:33:17should really look like I mean between

0:33:19like I know I know you wouldn't count

0:33:21Motorhead nap between like to set

0:33:23Motorhead but definitely what like Saxon

0:33:26Iron Maiden those bands with the spikes

0:33:30like that's what people figured out what

0:33:32heavy metal should look like he's he

0:33:33looked like he looked like a leathery

0:33:35gay man is what he looked like it just

0:33:37happened to fit in with what metal

0:33:38became but people used to look more

0:33:41don't you think people with on measures

0:33:42they used to just look more like stoners

0:33:44in in heavy metal unless you Ritchie

0:33:46Blackmore or running change do i think

0:33:49that i think that there was a time and

0:33:51this may be just because we were we were

0:33:53kids then and so adults some adults

0:33:56seemed especially scary anyway but but

0:34:00we were alive in a time when the the net

0:34:04amount of mail scariness like the mean

0:34:09scariness of adult men was much higher

0:34:12than it is now I'll astoundingly hire

0:34:14you know like everything everything was

0:34:17scarier than you ever did not have to

0:34:19and it's not just because we work

0:34:20because i remember being a teenager and

0:34:21feeling this way to that it that adult

0:34:24men were not to be trifled with

0:34:27and they did not need to advertise that

0:34:29they were scary by wearing clown makeup

0:34:32or by going i 4get just a man in a denim

0:34:38jacket with a cigarette in one hand in

0:34:40and a wrench in the other hand was an

0:34:44unpredictable and dangerous animal that

0:34:46you have that you if you could avoid you

0:34:48did a voice and now men like adult men

0:34:51are so defamed they are not scary and so

0:34:56you have this cart these these men and

0:34:58you see them all over even just among

0:35:01the hipsters guys who have tried to

0:35:03replace their lack of of like adult

0:35:09nurse or the the lack of like actual

0:35:12masculine scariness that should be in

0:35:15them and isn't they think they mask it

0:35:19with tattoos or they have the you know

0:35:22that they try to be weird together a lot

0:35:24more deliberate leader iki deliberately

0:35:26dirty thank you

0:35:28hey there's nothing there's something in

0:35:29like every time I see somebody with a

0:35:31really old

0:35:33timbuk2 bag and a bunch of tattoos and a

0:35:36moustache on a fixie look at all mad

0:35:38with like a got another cuff on the

0:35:40wrist

0:35:41unlike you understand you live in a city

0:35:42where costs a hundred thousand dollars

0:35:43here to live here like I want to

0:35:45understand you live with your friends

0:35:46and you make fifty thousand dollars a

0:35:48year but it's like you're not you're not

0:35:49living fucking West Virginia cooking

0:35:51meth in every single cisco down they

0:35:54have a jar of like beard conditioner

0:35:56that they forty dollars for that's made

0:35:59out of like bees wax from the Himalayas

0:36:01or something and keels hires lesbians

0:36:03asshole and and and what when when I was

0:36:06you know

0:36:07well certainly that that generation of

0:36:09British heavy metal that that spawned

0:36:12that look that became a cartoon

0:36:14[Music]

0:36:15I mean the guys in Saxon just looked

0:36:18like they were guys that had though

0:36:20we're rebuilding a Camaro you know like

0:36:23four guys rebuilding a commander they're

0:36:25like wipe their hands off on a dirty

0:36:26angulated it they were like costumes

0:36:28they weren't costumes they were just I

0:36:31mean like you look at ACDC certainly

0:36:32ACDC had their costumes but Bon Scott

0:36:36that they'd all been fired from a garage

0:36:38yeah bon scott who was five feet tall

0:36:41looked even if he was just wearing jeans

0:36:45and no shirt he looked like the scariest

0:36:49motherfucker you ever saw and a great

0:36:51guy least somebody totally want to party

0:36:53with it hang out with but also like

0:36:55somebody who I mean I'm six foot three

0:36:57and and and you know and eight bon scott

0:37:02looks like somebody who would climb up

0:37:04my pant leg to bite me on the neck you

0:37:07know like the fact that i have twice as

0:37:09tall as he is would not like stop him

0:37:11for a second like he would climb me in

0:37:15order to in order to like he would he

0:37:18would he would mount me basically and

0:37:21and and that whole generation of guys

0:37:23like they were just they were harder

0:37:25they're scarier their creepier creator

0:37:28there was there was just a cultural

0:37:29creepiness and whether I mean there's a

0:37:31whole kind of key party looking shit I

0:37:33mean I've seen the pictures i know

0:37:34you're making me enjoy not making me

0:37:36you've led me Gerry Rafferty and I'm

0:37:37enjoying it

0:37:38I haven't seen a picture of Gerry

0:37:39Rafferty yet read like a child molester

0:37:41well yeah Gerry Rafferty was obviously

0:37:43like enjoy a drink

0:37:45he was also drinking himself to enjoy it

0:37:46but now i just i told you the story you

0:37:48know where my dad showed up at a

0:37:50Wobblies meeting and I should have told

0:37:52you this story

0:37:53what was he like wigs now the wob the

0:37:55Wobblies they were that they were the

0:37:57original hardcore a sort of unionized

0:38:01I'm sorry yes

0:38:05ok sorry yes it's such a union is ok I

0:38:07got it yeah and and he my dad shows up

0:38:10and you know that the Wobblies were the

0:38:12Industrial Workers of the world the IWW

0:38:15where that they were they were tough

0:38:17they were they were they were thugs nice

0:38:20logo this is like dock workers

0:38:23and my dad my dad was he became the

0:38:26lawyer for the for the long shoreman's

0:38:29union in Washington in the fifties but

0:38:32in the thirties when he was 18 he and

0:38:37somebody's went down to the docks in a

0:38:39late at night to go to this Wobblies

0:38:42meeting and it was seriously the type of

0:38:46thing where I think like the parking lot

0:38:48was lit by torchlight you know that

0:38:51there were four guys just sitting there

0:38:53you know rhythmically slapping a giant

0:38:57pipe wrench into the palm of their hand

0:39:00and these kids walk up to the door of

0:39:03the my dad and his friends and walk up

0:39:05to the door of this warehouse and inside

0:39:09it's just like another just like yeah

0:39:12and there's a guy standing at the door

0:39:15and he grabs the kids by the shirt he

0:39:17goes

0:39:17show me your hands ok rough they are and

0:39:21you know and and all four of them show

0:39:23the palms of their hands and he points

0:39:26to the three better my dad's friend and

0:39:28he's like you three have never worked a

0:39:30day in your life get the fuck out of

0:39:31here

0:39:31well he looks at my dad and he goes

0:39:33you're all right kid and it's because my

0:39:36dad was on the crew team uh he's a rower

0:39:40his hands were covered with calluses

0:39:42from the oars any and the guy goes you

0:39:46can come in and so my dad goes into this

0:39:48meeting by himself what year is this

0:39:491938 holy shit and went into this

0:39:54meeting in it and became sort of a

0:39:55lifelong labor organizer but you know

0:39:59the prettiest of all sports really the

0:40:01the crew ya like it but like anything

0:40:04like a lacrosse callous but this was an

0:40:06arrow went out when a guy would stand at

0:40:08the door and and your hands would be

0:40:10your passport

0:40:12that's a that is I think that's the

0:40:15thing that does not exist anymore or not

0:40:18on any world I live in

0:40:20I just sent you a photograph that uh

0:40:24it's a you won't believe the year when

0:40:27you look at it from 1981 but it's from

0:40:29an IWW picket in i guess in Australia

0:40:32home on Scott and wow these guys either

0:40:37look like they're in the band or some

0:40:40kind of a of a violent pederasty club is

0:40:43like that look you know the thing about

0:40:461981 is that it was such an in-between

0:40:49pivotal pivotal time like there's

0:40:52they're like that the fact that the

0:40:54labor union guys would look like hippies

0:40:57at that point and yet there's also a guy

0:41:00in a leather blazer with kevin from the

0:41:03wrens he really does yeah he looks like

0:41:07he's like heaven is not a pederast to my

0:41:09nose like a newscaster um it's a times

0:41:12are really changing in 1980 dad made out

0:41:15laughs mass day knowing that you're that

0:41:21you're Dale Bozzio speech today all lost

0:41:24our and break destination unknown your

0:41:29hands would be your passport

0:41:32that's not a fortune cookie i like that

0:41:33you said that somebody tweeted me some

0:41:36weird of some weird uh fortune the other

0:41:39day in the voice of a soothsayer like a

0:41:44dwarf soothsayer from the from know like

0:41:49Leonardo DaVinci's town and he said you

0:41:54know that he said the crows were going

0:41:56to visit visit pain upon your something

0:41:59like that well this happened on the

0:42:01tutor

0:42:01yeah that doesn't get that sounds like a

0:42:03curse John you better watch out what you

0:42:05said when you check yourself

0:42:06well you know people are always some do

0:42:09you get classic question when cut this

0:42:10out we need to do you receive a lot of

0:42:12curses your knowledge no but but that

0:42:15but there isn't in in a in cantore

0:42:19element to things that people send me

0:42:22haha

0:42:24thanks and like an existentialist

0:42:26serving suggestion

0:42:28well it's it it's more I I don't know

0:42:30what it is about because i don't

0:42:32typically attract a lot of like people

0:42:36don't want to roleplay with me i don't

0:42:38think but there are some like

0:42:41scandinavian black metal people that

0:42:44just want to check stuff out the run

0:42:46stuff by me i'm not sure what it is but

0:42:48I do get a lot of like weird spells the

0:42:51jargon would you put this knife into and

0:42:55I don't know I don't know what that big

0:42:57long time fan john quinn question if

0:42:59you'd killed this in a field band which

0:43:01bone with you now on first I think it's

0:43:03because I recognized expert on the the

0:43:06duty of lithuania I get a lot of again a

0:43:10lot of Central European learn about that

0:43:12lithuania here well you know I came to

0:43:15stand for example just for what it's

0:43:16worth I I've been something to think

0:43:17about for a while there are lists of

0:43:19people who want to be on talk shows

0:43:22there are you can sign up to be on a

0:43:24list of people you could say what you're

0:43:25fucked up about and then some Jerry

0:43:27Springer s Show have you want to throw a

0:43:29chair you can register for this you can

0:43:31see people that have done it more than

0:43:32once

0:43:33it seems to me that given the kinds of

0:43:34information you have in the ways that

0:43:35you can help people it might be useful

0:43:37for you to have some kind of a registry

0:43:39I mean I don't know whether that's a

0:43:41web-sight I don't know if it's an agency

0:43:42of some kind but for example if you

0:43:44wanted to find out what kind of but

0:43:46singer bones to eat first and needed

0:43:48some kind of kind of somebody who is

0:43:49familiar with lithuania I don't know how

0:43:51to find you

0:43:52I mean this is the problem and part of

0:43:54the problem is that i am a that I you

0:43:56know I'm you're busy you're very busy

0:43:57man i'm busy and i'm also an expert on

0:43:59everything so how would I register do

0:44:01you want to do you need somebody that

0:44:03knows about it ask John you know like

0:44:05that's not gonna tell ya I think a lot

0:44:07of people think of themselves as knowing

0:44:08everything about everything

0:44:10well how do you distinguish yourself in

0:44:11that crowded market apart from taking

0:44:13people down a peg one of the time that's

0:44:15time consuming you're busy as we said he

0:44:17stipulated you know I think a lot of the

0:44:19people that end up on TV are the

0:44:20specialists they're the people that know

0:44:21just about the Battle of Gettysburg or

0:44:23they know just about how aliens built

0:44:26the ancient pyramids get a horse it's

0:44:28very hard to be a polymath anymore and i

0:44:32think it's it's just one of those things

0:44:33where you have to have just enjoy the

0:44:36satisfaction

0:44:37of knowing everything that must be that

0:44:41must be so frustrating for you have to

0:44:43do I mean first of all the burden you

0:44:44say it's not a burden I think it's

0:44:46because you're a gentleman but you walk

0:44:47around with a lot of knowledge

0:44:49that'sthat's it's sitting there and it's

0:44:51boiling in that I don't know how you

0:44:52keep the lid on

0:44:53well here's the problem in America and

0:44:55particularly on the west coast nobody

0:44:57wants to know about lithuania nobody

0:44:59wants to know about the three means i

0:45:01have you tried I tried all the time to

0:45:04bring some just glazed eyes the only

0:45:06people that care about lithuania are

0:45:08lithuanian 'he's or not even the

0:45:11children of Lithuanian want to know

0:45:12about it so you just it's just like the

0:45:15winds and then people in Scandinavia who

0:45:16are trying to like reanimate both

0:45:19columns who are living in the attics of

0:45:21decommission synagogues those people are

0:45:25taking you

0:45:26he gave me an order-of-magnitude

0:45:27estimate on how many as there are uh

0:45:30good columns in in the Attic civil

0:45:32synagogues and other people who want to

0:45:34reanimate them

0:45:35OIC people in scanning as far as you

0:45:37know it's seasonal I've changed it gets

0:45:40a little warmer it's it's kind of a

0:45:43thing that's really actually kind of

0:45:44localized in Finland and Sweden that

0:45:46decode the Norwegians are on a different

0:45:48trip

0:45:49well it's like Christians on on Easter

0:45:51and Christmas

0:45:52I mean you have gotten knocked everybody

0:45:54gets up and tries to get shit

0:45:55Oh column knocked at such a time finger

0:45:58bring your ex singers bones

0:46:00the thing is a lot of those synagogues

0:46:02in Eastern Europe you know they've been

0:46:03converted into rec centers or their you

0:46:06know their video game parlours now or

0:46:07internet cafe lounge all appearances

0:46:09you don't even know that it's a former

0:46:11synagogue except for the giant star of

0:46:13david rose window so you know who know

0:46:17that this could be a thing actually this

0:46:20could be one of those like mayan

0:46:22calendar events we even your little

0:46:24leading consultancy are you talking

0:46:26about the general holiday every

0:46:27animating columns that comes our columns

0:46:30I think of a golem is being a Jewish

0:46:32thing it a dnd thing in a Jewish thing

0:46:34it is but when you're talking about

0:46:36reanimating clay a tama ton's I think

0:46:40entrails I'm not thinking of wrinkles

0:46:42when you're talking about who is the

0:46:44constituency for people who want to

0:46:47reanimate automatons

0:46:49soo hoo hoo come back to to you know to

0:46:53wreak havoc who wants to do that more

0:46:56than scandinavian metalheads it's

0:46:58chocolate buttons aren't into that

0:47:00anymore they're thinking soup

0:47:02yeah there's somewhere else and I

0:47:03finally done with the way the body as

0:47:05board has not been interested in

0:47:06environmental for some time now he

0:47:08doesn't remember a thing

0:47:10no it's all these kids it's all these

0:47:11black metal kids that are serious about

0:47:13black metal they're not the ones that

0:47:14are wearing like a cartoon lipstick but

0:47:17but the ones that are better dressing

0:47:19like normal people

0:47:20other passing through passing myself but

0:47:23I've got a book about black metal and

0:47:26about the whole that whole scene with

0:47:27some ways the name of that band that

0:47:30they're all you know nouns like artists

0:47:33are harvested raaz and you know what

0:47:38forget this is chandra of Scandinavia

0:47:40noun I'm gonna look I'm gonna start a

0:47:42list of fake Norwegian black metal bands

0:47:44and the first peacock Carbonaro i'm

0:47:50looking at a book on my shelf right now

0:47:51that is the book is just called gothic

0:47:54and though the title is written in comic

0:47:57lettering and i have not looked at this

0:48:00book in many years i'm pulling it off

0:48:01the shelf now nobody their house smells

0:48:04like clothes cigarettes or has an

0:48:05interesting arch those kind of come up

0:48:07smelling I can have all got the guards

0:48:09that's the only the ceiling the only are

0:48:12checking ball know really well I columns

0:48:15you know I didn't mean so many archers

0:48:16we had we had a class in high school

0:48:18called humanities which I'm really kind

0:48:20of sorry I didn't take it was very

0:48:21tedious but it's something I could

0:48:23really use I can't download or a column

0:48:24from dirty column and display a

0:48:27derivative kollam that's Factory Records

0:48:29joke that wasn't very fun all very

0:48:33interesting this is really a book on the

0:48:35whole gothic movement don't don't don't

0:48:38happen to have this year do decide do I

0:48:42remember mystery their ministry before

0:48:44they were all like angry you know I

0:48:46bottom without about which ministry

0:48:49became a thing i had already gone a

0:48:53different Road

0:48:54yeah but they weren't that song with you

0:48:55remember that song was everywhere i do

0:48:57it was that it was the very first time

0:49:00I was in a band with a guy who shaved

0:49:02the sides of his head but left the top

0:49:04will grow long handsome and it was it

0:49:08was that I think that made me that

0:49:13divorce myself from mr. likes the link

0:49:15i'm not saying trent reznor but i'm

0:49:17saying i like a young trent reznor still

0:49:18figuring it out back surface sure before

0:49:21before and had before becoming

0:49:23entrenched like at AC that just like me

0:49:27it's everything from Chicago lobbying

0:49:30parent paler here in this thing you know

0:49:31there was a real there's a lot i know

0:49:34that was i've been i've been to

0:49:35Wrestlemania it marked in any way did

0:49:41they go for the tourist dollars there

0:49:43transylvania who I could see them really

0:49:45really saying look you know what I mean

0:49:48what kind of industries do you have in

0:49:50in the transformation living today I

0:49:52guess it's probably not called that

0:49:53unless it's a dookie was worth spreading

0:49:55apart like Romania yeah it's part of

0:49:58Romania it was traditionally Hungarian

0:50:00it's part of Romania this is part of the

0:50:03fucking world war one bullshit

0:50:04I'm afraid so often we know what about

0:50:06Austria hungry what about it or play

0:50:09diplomacy is that a game or is that a

0:50:13sex game you play D&D I put sex

0:50:16diplomacy diplomacy diplomacy and if you

0:50:21ever played judge being the person you

0:50:23are somewhere between a million military

0:50:25historian and a paladin national palette

0:50:28and you'd be an anti palette and I think

0:50:29you are you always seem like a military

0:50:32or story because that's what we end up

0:50:34talking about but I I polymath your

0:50:36polymethyl things you can't talk about

0:50:37everything at once everything that once

0:50:39was a bangles who who did that

0:50:41everywhere once everything hits at once

0:50:44that spoon

0:50:44okay I like that advanced cassette song

0:50:47my thinking on this is diplomacy

0:50:50okay here's the thing the other is a

0:50:51like-for-like avalon hill games like

0:50:54that is like risk right

0:50:55oh no this is this is well I mean it is

0:50:58but Reno risk feels like fucking like

0:51:00playing trouble or sorry compared to

0:51:03diplomacy diplomacy you have a board

0:51:05and the board is pre World War One

0:51:09europe and russia and you don't feed the

0:51:14the I think maybe the only element of

0:51:17chance and the entire game is which

0:51:19country you are and I forgive me then

0:51:21who'd I will probably get this wrong but

0:51:22everything was the rescue just slow slog

0:51:25through the point where you have no

0:51:26choices you have no idea you have no

0:51:28idea

0:51:29no way to hear everybody gets and i'm

0:51:31going to try to guess the number but

0:51:32everybody gets a certain number of

0:51:34armies and where appropriate navies and

0:51:37the only different one is Russia which I

0:51:39think it's one more Navy you become a

0:51:41country and here's what you do you try

0:51:42to take over Europe and how do you do

0:51:44this you go and you talked to everybody

0:51:47from the other countries not in the

0:51:48presence of other people and then you

0:51:51write your orders

0:51:52alright so put the parlor game where you

0:51:53go like a parlor game it's very

0:51:55sophisticated military trying to the

0:51:57bathroom and they make a bigger plan and

0:51:59then the two people go into the kitchen

0:52:01and make a plan type 88 wrap a cockatiel

0:52:03and you bring up on ya shes Christ do

0:52:06not understand very if I show you the

0:52:08picture of me and diplomacy close in

0:52:09diplomacy club did you know that this

0:52:11was a thing that they endorsed in school

0:52:13well known as a military school so it's

0:52:15a picture of me and dress blues in front

0:52:16of diplomacy again sent this to me man

0:52:18so why can't I i did not grow up playing

0:52:23board games just hate pork and we just

0:52:26I'm sorry this is I don't like to go mad

0:52:28but we talked about four games a lot on

0:52:29you look nice today and exact fucking

0:52:31hate board games

0:52:32I hate board game people don't hate them

0:52:34I despise them but I don't hate them I

0:52:35you know I feel love for everyone

0:52:37especially people that I want to help

0:52:38here's my helping stop with the board

0:52:40games i sat at a table one time watching

0:52:42people play settlers of catan and I and

0:52:45I found it to be very a very soothing

0:52:48and very much it was set in sensory

0:52:51sellers of catan settlers of catan which

0:52:54is one of the what they call the German

0:52:57board games which are board games that

0:53:00are that the Germans popularized some

0:53:03common choice it there there there yet

0:53:05government so they are the hair their

0:53:07strategy games and you everybody at the

0:53:10board is given a certain number of

0:53:12natural resources and they they used in

0:53:15a trade with one another and they use

0:53:17those natural resources to

0:53:19gain territory is what you like risk and

0:53:22sins and making on they build they build

0:53:25little civilizations on the board and

0:53:26stuff I I went into this situation I

0:53:29didn't actually play the game but I went

0:53:31into the situation of being an observer

0:53:32of the game the you know somewhat with

0:53:37the feeling like I'm gonna sit here for

0:53:38three minutes and this is going to bore

0:53:40me selling I'm gonna leave and instead I

0:53:42SAT there through an entire game and and

0:53:45and found it very interesting not that

0:53:47it still wasn't a thing that i would

0:53:48that i would do myself but but I

0:53:51understood i started to understand the

0:53:53board gaming culture because it was very

0:53:56relaxing and everybody's got their

0:53:58everybody's got their little duplicity

0:54:00they're trying to scope out what other

0:54:03people are doing but at the same time

0:54:04it's let's call me what I like about it

0:54:07i like i like that everybody's into it

0:54:09and I respect things where everybody

0:54:11there's into because there's not that

0:54:12many things where everybody's into it

0:54:14and like I actually i have have a friend

0:54:16and occasional of business person whose

0:54:19sister was one of the co-creators of I

0:54:21think this is correct of magic the

0:54:22gathering so they still got like the

0:54:24original like cards from Magic the

0:54:26Gathering so she just sells one of those

0:54:28cards every year and puzzles me is

0:54:31another yacht was another helicopter

0:54:33carrier now but he's a really typical

0:54:35guy very nerdy and like a but yeah

0:54:38especially the photograph I knew a guy

0:54:40whose job is where the building is how

0:54:43i've tried to remember where i met this

0:54:44guy but have been to his house and he

0:54:47has an entire floor of his house that's

0:54:49just for legos and his job is to sit

0:54:55with little Lego bits and build new lego

0:55:00cars for Lego like a second Imagineer

0:55:03he's an Imagineer and then he sends

0:55:04these things off and then lego produces

0:55:06them as kits that's his job

0:55:09I don't know where i met this guy some

0:55:11guy picked up in a bar he picked me up

0:55:13took me home

0:55:14I don't have no idea how this that you

0:55:17get a lego hook up but but I I but I met

0:55:20this guy and and he showed me all of his

0:55:22bins it was pretty hot

0:55:25alright i'm looking at the pictures that

0:55:26he sent okay here we go

0:55:29some flicker a an old technology

0:55:32oh my goodness look at you front and

0:55:35center in your little restless uniform

0:55:40you guys look so amazing

0:55:41that's the same apprentice maybe a

0:55:43seaman navigator and and you gave

0:55:45everybody of the you gave everybody the

0:55:48let's look at my favorite part is just

0:55:51look at my hands

0:55:53ya hear they're there they're crossed in

0:55:55a very calm adult way from the guy the

0:55:58guy to your left with the eyebrows yet

0:56:01was I was it a plan Eric but maybe he

0:56:06was my roommate we were in lines but

0:56:08you'll be gave everybody the animal

0:56:10house where are they now captions

0:56:12well not me my friend John multidecadal

0:56:14grass but no but I mean look at look at

0:56:16look at every person that picture I mean

0:56:18isn't this people they're gonna be very

0:56:19dangerous someday

0:56:20all right you know what I'm gonna have

0:56:22to do i'm gonna have to dig up a

0:56:23photograph of me in the Civil Air Patrol

0:56:25same era is there is this your flight

0:56:28suit wearing my dress blues

0:56:30oh brother and I may even be standing at

0:56:34attention and saluting the camera i was

0:56:37on was on the drill team not know you

0:56:39want the girls with thighs i have

0:56:40marched i marched did move to the right

0:56:42here in military school but if i'm not

0:56:44mistaken these uniforms are navy

0:56:46auxiliary uniform

0:56:48we're in that we are in the wash like is

0:56:51a NJ in JROTC right the naval Junior

0:56:57ROTC at straight a's entire year so this

0:57:00is how to satisfy don't have the red

0:57:02star I don't you can see above my anchor

0:57:04on my little anchor have a star at the

0:57:07red four-star strays the radford star

0:57:09the naval Junior ROTC the guy to my

0:57:12right Glenn lucker that guy was looking

0:57:14tough

0:57:15yeah it looks good on look at all that

0:57:16we call him a shot at how its and sour

0:57:18chicken salad heavenly hash we call it

0:57:20chicken him know on the each it got

0:57:23scrambled eggs if it's on a hat but it

0:57:25when it's a bunch of ribbons on the

0:57:26front parents just called I don't let

0:57:28your ribbons ribbons yeah easy shot he

0:57:31was the company guidon i think it was

0:57:33called accuse the flag carrier you are

0:57:35very cute kid Merlin you haven't had a

0:57:37very cute underbite who had a lot of

0:57:40freckles

0:57:41there's a lot of kids in this who's

0:57:42ears are bigger than the rest of their

0:57:44face yeah and Backlund maggio i think is

0:57:47the most distinctive he's the one who

0:57:48looks a little bit like Wally hands he's

0:57:50got that kind of gentle touching hands

0:57:52oh he does yeah but that bored what do

0:57:54you think of that looks really simple

0:57:55but you walk around with paper for like

0:57:5711 hours trying to undermine your

0:57:58friends

0:57:59it's a lot like a reality show after

0:58:00World War 1 / 1 Europe as writers all

0:58:03the affection for pre World War One

0:58:04europe i never understood it

0:58:06this type of thing this this board game

0:58:08playing and so forth because I board

0:58:13game let's think for the most part I you

0:58:17know when school was over I ran home

0:58:20that's what you're being chased

0:58:24no no because I big change because it's

0:58:30a prescription chicken with my elbows in

0:58:34my side and my hands down

0:58:37stop like a jockey caper

0:58:43no I ran home because I because my first

0:58:50air w wouldn't do this

0:58:52I was so consumed with the little my

0:58:54imaginary life the life of my

0:58:56imagination that interacting with other

0:58:59kids around the topic of of world war

0:59:04one or like or who's going to take over

0:59:06Europe would have been so it was it it

0:59:09was unimaginable to me that would be

0:59:12more fun than me just sitting alone in

0:59:14my room staring at the wall imagining

0:59:16myself taking over Europe

0:59:22oh my gosh I should've peed first I want

0:59:25to hear so much about first of all you

0:59:29are you know it's a word that we've all

0:59:30learned in the last week was fabulous

0:59:32how true is that kind of it's really

0:59:37true for real

0:59:39it's so true how much did you know if I

0:59:41could say for background where are you

0:59:42know we're talking about when you're 11

0:59:4312 13 and so you had at this point even

0:59:47so you your steep as you said you were

0:59:49literally he said you're literally

0:59:50steeped in military history

0:59:52yeah so you ever had you already knew

0:59:55your father shot Japanese zero out of

0:59:57the sky with a 45 right it's

0:59:57the sky with a 45 right it's

1:00:00we're already surrounded with truly

1:00:01truly astounding stories during that

1:00:04period from fourth grade 2 10th grade

1:00:08when when they said it very brief window

1:00:113.42 10th grade

1:00:14whenever I was assigned a research

1:00:16project i would write up i would write a

1:00:20paper on some aspect of world war one or

1:00:22war two and in tenth grade I started to

1:00:26write about Marxism but from fourth

1:00:30grade to tonight's great let's say I

1:00:33just I i wrote I wrote a hundred reports

1:00:36on world war 2 in world war one so i

1:00:39would sit and I night my my

1:00:41understanding of those things was very

1:00:43incomplete still but I had the had the

1:00:46sense that Hitler had made it had made a

1:00:49mistake not it or had made a mistake

1:00:50invading russia that that i did not

1:00:57fully understand like the Russian

1:00:59contribution to the war but I understood

1:01:02that the Japanese had made a mistake in

1:01:03bombing Pearl Harbor and I would I just

1:01:08you know I repeat the mistake a mistake

1:01:10beyond that wasn't very nice but a

1:01:11tactical like waking the sleeping giant

1:01:14well a little bit and and and

1:01:17particularly like the the idea that the

1:01:21idea of the the Navy the Navy's of all

1:01:24these countries in 1938 we're still very

1:01:27battleship oriented you know the

1:01:30battleship was the was right the leader

1:01:33of the fleet it was the flagship of the

1:01:35commander of the fleet all because the

1:01:37party because the planes couldn't go as

1:01:39far and supplies had to go somewhere

1:01:41it wasn't the same kind of air based

1:01:43warfare even then that wouldn't happen

1:01:45today that had never that hadn't

1:01:47happened still slog in some ways right

1:01:48everybody's for everybody's always

1:01:50fighting the last war who so before the

1:01:53war it was like battleship battleship

1:01:55battleship battleship and there was a

1:01:57growing understanding that aircraft

1:01:59carriers we're going to play a bigger

1:02:00role but but still everybody was fixated

1:02:04on the battleship so they attacked Pearl

1:02:05Harbor and they destroyed all of our

1:02:09battleships

1:02:10but it ended up that aircraft carriers

1:02:13were the definitive certainly in the

1:02:15Pacific aircraft carriers with the

1:02:17definitive ship and when we sank for

1:02:21carriers at the Battle of Midway for you

1:02:23know Japanese carriers they never

1:02:25recovered from that so there-there error

1:02:30was thinking that that they could sink

1:02:32our fleet quote-unquote and basically

1:02:35put us out of the war in the Pacific but

1:02:37they didn't get a single carrier at

1:02:40Pearl Harbor

1:02:41Oh interested not sink a single American

1:02:45carrier can just get a general question

1:02:47serious general question tom is battle

1:02:50ship is that a general term like what's

1:02:53it what's a destroyer to destroy is a

1:02:55kind of battleship it's a small fast

1:02:58ship yeah a battleship is one is

1:03:01something like the USS Iowa that has

1:03:03giant cannons that is it closer to like

1:03:07a sea-based base of operations for other

1:03:10ships

1:03:11I mean with your the command guy if

1:03:13you're like an admiral and you're going

1:03:14to run next on amaranth i guess but i

1:03:16mean you don't saying like I you know

1:03:18like so even if you're an admiral the

1:03:21battleship would be the center of a

1:03:23flotilla operates an operation ok so

1:03:25maybe i'll shut up for fucking minute

1:03:27and we give me to superfast rough as

1:03:29fast as you like to rough taxonomy of

1:03:31fighting at sea because I don't really

1:03:32understand it well in the old in the old

1:03:35days you you brought your ships up to

1:03:39within range of your guns and the your

1:03:42enemy ships would be a raid opposite you

1:03:45and you would fire fusillade of cannon

1:03:50shells at one another until somebody

1:03:52sank the other guy you know like really

1:03:55just get within range of your guns and

1:03:58go that's the equivalent like two guys

1:04:01fighting with clubs just he's gonna last

1:04:02longer before they go down

1:04:04yeah and two little fleets I mean you

1:04:05know battleship would never be sitting

1:04:07out there in the open it would always be

1:04:08surrounded by destroyers and you know a

1:04:12tenders and pocket battleships and all

1:04:15these other little you know every

1:04:16different size of the ship but at the

1:04:19time you had one yet he had different

1:04:22sizes of cake

1:04:24women and torpedoes that was that was

1:04:28what you had to work with open minds i

1:04:29guess you could lay mines right before

1:04:32that was naval warfare that was what you

1:04:35would want you in mind like a harbor you

1:04:37and minding mines were mostly defensive

1:04:39right

1:04:40no no you could you could you could mind

1:04:43the english channel as long as before

1:04:45submarines were heavily used you can

1:04:47also use mine just take out a ship my

1:04:49mind big for submarines eventually right

1:04:51but I mean this is for ships I thought

1:04:52you might like a harbor you absolutely

1:04:54mind Harbor but you could you could mine

1:04:57anywhere that you didn't think your own

1:04:59ships would go like mining I think

1:05:01mining was channel would be a bad idea

1:05:03because everybody's using it so it would

1:05:05be that would be much more than like

1:05:06mining chick-fil-a that's how would be

1:05:08much more than an anarchic war strategy

1:05:12like you know what fuck everybody that's

1:05:14it that's it that's it that's the jet

1:05:15the Japanese 1945 kind of questions like

1:05:18fucking combined we're just we're gonna

1:05:21we're gonna lose this shit and style but

1:05:24when you got to the point where ships

1:05:26had first of all cannons that could fire

1:05:28over the horizon and then of course

1:05:32submarines and airplanes you know your

1:05:35strategy and the importance of a fleet

1:05:37really changed if you if you could

1:05:40station an aircraft carrier somewhere

1:05:42you

1:05:43I mean you basically could contribute

1:05:46you can what war two tortoises if you

1:05:49control the air you control the whole

1:05:51game and and I mean we still practice

1:05:56this form of aircraft carrier diplomacy

1:05:59the United States is that is the main

1:06:01practitioner of the world war one the

1:06:03plane thing was to tell if i'm wrong but

1:06:04the painting was still pretty novel and

1:06:06not nearly as reliable as it would be

1:06:08yeah don't

1:06:10airplanes are like me now at

1:06:15at like the Bombers in world war one

1:06:19seriously there's a guy who leaned out

1:06:22of the open and shower job they shot the

1:06:25bomb captain exactly held a bomb at arms

1:06:28like it was like I'm take that there was

1:06:31actually like a bowling ball with a few

1:06:33it's you know there was no take that

1:06:36Jerry yeah like step ones were a bigger

1:06:41factor i love Zeppelin's about world war

1:06:43one in terms of bomb

1:06:45um but it in the you know by the time

1:06:48World War two came along the airplanes

1:06:50that was the whole war but they look

1:06:52like they came up with the technology to

1:06:54be able like fire fire fire your fire

1:06:56between the propeller I mean it wasn't

1:06:58like a really big deal you don't like

1:07:00synchronized that CD she propeller oh

1:07:02yeah well because before before they had

1:07:04the synchronized guns they had to mount

1:07:06the either mounted machine guns on top

1:07:09of the other wing of the biplane yes

1:07:11training training with that yeah so

1:07:13you're flying with your flying with one

1:07:14hand and you reach up and grab the

1:07:16trigger of the gun and I like right try

1:07:19this try walking out try holding 238 at

1:07:22arm's length and try to hit something

1:07:23within a couple shots are 238 up above

1:07:26your head like like you're like a robert

1:07:30rodriguez make that area take that chair

1:07:34I'm sorry I got you off it safely it's

1:07:37like it's like it's like the infantry in

1:07:39the sense that there's this big massive

1:07:41thing there's the outline get the spies

1:07:43a lot of this for me comes for strategic

1:07:45stratego so forgive me but you've got

1:07:47like you know like I like Kennedy like

1:07:49the book Kennedy was in was for doing

1:07:50close-in attacks BBT but would go like a

1:07:53PT boat would go flight you told me this

1:07:55you go getting real close and sneak in a

1:07:57little attacking what it was a torpedo

1:07:59boat so it was basically a fast and

1:08:01torpedoes out of that little boat

1:08:03yeah they had they had torpedoes

1:08:05actually on the deck in tubes and they

1:08:08would happen you know they had really

1:08:09powerful motors would boats that would

1:08:12just get up on steps so dangerous it was

1:08:15incredible they would they would they

1:08:16would weave in between the mines get

1:08:19into a harbor and they're flying between

1:08:23these boats at night guys are shooting

1:08:24at him in the dark and they're like

1:08:26unleashing torpedoes at

1:08:28that ships that are like in Harbor it

1:08:30was it was totally ball z game the PT

1:08:33boats but but before before world war

1:08:37one certainly and even up to war two

1:08:39ships like what other way was there to

1:08:44assert your colonial authority over your

1:08:48far-flung territories then with your

1:08:50Navy who you know you if you if you had

1:08:53if if if you had a colonial governor in

1:08:58goa you took him there on a ship and you

1:09:02maintain your your hedge emoni over that

1:09:04territory by having a navy and that was

1:09:08so you're new so control of the Seas was

1:09:12control of the world and write you would

1:09:14have these days of economies of scale

1:09:16also write any ships obviously have

1:09:18different shapes different purposes but

1:09:19but but this is what Spain did right i

1:09:21mean that ability to control the Seas

1:09:23whether that was with trade

1:09:26I mean you needed things if you're going

1:09:27to trade with a ship you've got to have

1:09:29you can have multiple not defensive

1:09:33ships right i mean you got to protect

1:09:34those ships there's gotta be a way of

1:09:36making sure that this the ship full of

1:09:38gold and spices or whatever is not gonna

1:09:41just get hijacked by whoever comes along

1:09:42exactly what that is that's the the

1:09:45birth of insurance the entire concept of

1:09:48the insurance industry was born in italy

1:09:52during the Renaissance when you had all

1:09:55of these ships and it the this Italian

1:09:58you know a navy that was trading all

1:10:02around the world and people realize like

1:10:05I'm invested my entire fortune is in

1:10:09this one boat full of frankincense and

1:10:13if it goes down I'm I'm ruined

1:10:16but if I pull my money with some other

1:10:19guys who have their ships floating

1:10:22around and we all get together and kind

1:10:24of like it decrease our risk by being

1:10:27partners and and and share share the

1:10:31concept of shared risk

1:10:33was you know it basically invented in

1:10:36his studies

1:10:37it is so interesting and so far away

1:10:40from what it means today my god that's

1:10:42unbelievable

1:10:43yeah yeah so it was just a way of of

1:10:45people who now were trading today we

1:10:47just assume that nobody ever get sick

1:10:49yeah let's see available to imagine like

1:10:52I i have i've worked my entire life I've

1:10:55got this bag of gold and i'm going to

1:10:57buy peace these this blue painted

1:11:01porcelain china and i'm going to try and

1:11:03sell it for a profit here in in Florence

1:11:05and then the ship gets attacked by

1:11:10pirates in the Straits of Malacca and

1:11:13you're like oh oops that was it or you

1:11:17know I mean so anyway and and the fact

1:11:20that the spanish armada was what was

1:11:23sunk by that's that freak storm as I had

1:11:27happened and Elizabeth's England was

1:11:29preserved like to talk about the tides

1:11:33of history tells us it's virgin this

1:11:34isn't james burke shit talking about a

1:11:36turning point if God did not love

1:11:39England the spanish armada would have

1:11:43survived and we would this would be a

1:11:45whole different world with the fucking

1:11:47English for so long they had so many

1:11:49they had so many things to make them

1:11:50feel that they were really lucky really

1:11:52did was really really they were merely

1:11:54lucky they stood on the shore and they

1:11:56watch this Armada of Spanish ships

1:11:57approaching they get to see them coming

1:12:00see them coming and it was the largest

1:12:03Armada ever mounted England was

1:12:06straight-up thought and then of freak

1:12:10storm destroyed the armana how do you

1:12:16account for this Merlin if it is not

1:12:18that God loves England i'm sitting here

1:12:20thinking about it i'm not a papist I'm

1:12:21not an Anglican I'm trying to figure

1:12:23this out

1:12:24yeah now you see the Germans the Germans

1:12:26what you know worship berries you have

1:12:28to do you think and you think a country

1:12:30full of the Anglican right nutrition

1:12:32England is that where we call it

1:12:34thank ya wanna see implicants we thought

1:12:37episcopal because we're not Catholic

1:12:39light media we we tried to make a little

1:12:42division between us and england

1:12:44boy tried that but yeah you know I I

1:12:47know your big believer in the power of

1:12:48prayer but that boy that's that's

1:12:50unbelievable it is miraculous ok so my

1:12:52question to you

1:12:53december 7041 where the carriers with in

1:12:56Seattle

1:12:57haha haha the big question how the wrong

1:13:00place asshole haha they were Arizona she

1:13:04marries they were in San Francisco and

1:13:06they were you know they were arrayed

1:13:08kind of a round but we but it was still

1:13:11unclear that carriers were were so

1:13:13important let's find out where the

1:13:15carriers were that's a great that's a

1:13:16great question

1:13:17they weren't in pearl harbor they were

1:13:19at sea they were everywhere but there

1:13:23this is getting ahold of the show and my

1:13:25congratulations to us on keeping the

1:13:27Hitler going up but the person you know

1:13:29what somebody said to me the other day

1:13:30they listened to our Hitler episode

1:13:32there like units numbered talk about

1:13:33Hitler at all

1:13:34I'll please well that's the Austrian in

1:13:37the room

1:13:38come on Hitler you don't have to you

1:13:40have to talk about Hitler to be talking

1:13:42about Hitler if you know what I mean

1:13:43no no they say when you stop talking

1:13:44about nuclear war and that's when

1:13:45everybody's worried that some kind i

1:13:49don't be a dick about it could ask to

1:13:50point out two two two syllables and

1:13:53stuff em and stuff it's Hitler related

1:13:56stuff often and learning stuff right now

1:13:58is tough

1:13:59there's been some question as to whether

1:14:01stuff has one effort to alert install

1:14:04two questions like I cancer free right

1:14:05now first of all it is ' and it's and

1:14:08second of all these 2s and stuff for

1:14:10fear and often fluffin often slip

1:14:12yeah dude perfect oh no white polish we

1:14:16should spell with this this this cool

1:14:18esas yeah there's no learning us to

1:14:22learn students may be like in Congress

1:14:26right we could do it the ligature or

1:14:28something up

1:14:31ah yeah let's go need a thing you know

1:14:34about all the 88 thing what is the

1:14:36eighth thing into infinity

1:14:38um that's pretty good you took it turned

1:14:41it literally you took them and turn them

1:14:43omgawd 8i guess

1:14:48this is a test think it is 88 white

1:14:50supremacy you know what this is going to

1:14:53have to mean all the show I don't really

1:14:55follow the whole white supremacist

1:14:56numerological like code system as much

1:15:01as I should

1:15:01one of the very first things i use my

1:15:03computer for in one box finally bought

1:15:05my own computer and like 1988 i had my

1:15:07first mac with your floppy disks and

1:15:09where the first things they did I bought

1:15:10this book up about like the little pale

1:15:13horse know now is that George RR George

1:15:17Martin

1:15:17now behold the behold a pale horse is a

1:15:20like the the crucial conspiracy theory

1:15:24book the best the one that that has all

1:15:27the documentation that ties the

1:15:29Trilateral Commission to the the oh my

1:15:33god i got the Trilateral Commission talk

1:15:35around the time i was in diplomacy club

1:15:36oh I had a very interesting to talk

1:15:38about ah yes before I knew about batshit

1:15:40insanity i had a very interesting talk

1:15:42with my parents take house but I fear

1:15:44you just go horse if i'm not mistaken

1:15:46our scholars pale rider no pillars at it

1:15:51it ties all of the the Masons and

1:15:53everything together and then makes a

1:15:55very compelling case that in fact all of

1:15:58these groups are working at the behest

1:16:00of our extraterrestrial overloads oh

1:16:04that's tiny since it is very tidy

1:16:08it's a unified field theory of bananas

1:16:10that's correct and it and and i read

1:16:13this book at a time when I was doing a

1:16:14lot of recreational use of oh that

1:16:20already mined real human real open to

1:16:23new ideas

1:16:24yeah exactly and this is iris I was

1:16:26smoking a lot of I was enjoying that

1:16:28with an appeals open my mind a lot in

1:16:301988 well this was this often with Plan

1:16:33B and this was when I was making the

1:16:35transition from all of the nice drugs

1:16:38that allow one to play frisbee for

1:16:40several hours without ever wondering

1:16:43what you're doing with your life

1:16:44oh all of those nice kind drugs that

1:16:48make that make you think that you can

1:16:50talk to dogs

1:16:52and i was i was trying to teach me

1:16:54amazing the kind of thing that makes you

1:16:57capture cockatiel in the shop for

1:16:58exactly who doesn't look that that's a

1:17:01great way to feel you just wonder what

1:17:03you do today I felt on the shower trying

1:17:04to catch a cockatiel just I just wanted

1:17:07to just wanted to give I didn't want to

1:17:09hurt him i wanted to get with him so

1:17:10that we could have an understanding but

1:17:12then I was not suddenly changed I was

1:17:14transitioning from those drugs too bad

1:17:17drugs drugs that are made by human

1:17:19beings that are full of evil forces you

1:17:23used to smoke and then getting a bathtub

1:17:25and now you're getting stuff that was

1:17:27made in a bathtub that you smoke

1:17:29that's exactly right and stuff that once

1:17:31you so much you just shot want to get in

1:17:33a bathtub at all didn't want to do

1:17:35anything nice didn't want to play

1:17:36frisbee you did not think you could talk

1:17:38to dogs making real focused and not want

1:17:40to play frisbee dogs are looking at you

1:17:42in a way that you that makes you very

1:17:43uncomfortable and it was during that

1:17:45period that i read the whole pale horse

1:17:47bad timing i was i was obviously you

1:17:50know i did not even even doing these

1:17:53terrible things did not make me into a

1:17:55stupid person who believed that the

1:17:56aliens were controlling our government

1:17:58through them through the Masons but it i

1:18:02did at one point lying in bed under a

1:18:06spell

1:18:06let's say of sub various like powders I

1:18:11lay in bed and I said to myself if

1:18:14because my apartment was right into the

1:18:16flight pattern for the local airport i

1:18:19said to myself self if aliens were

1:18:25transacting daily business with America

1:18:29would they know

1:18:32not disguise their spaceships as 747 if

1:18:38they disguised them as something like a

1:18:42bowl of fruit

1:18:43it would seem pretty weird that the

1:18:45fruit was flying if you need something

1:18:47to fly and have it not seem weird

1:18:49you're either gonna be a bird work or

1:18:51football or a plane maybe even maybe

1:18:56even maybe it could be a minute to be a

1:18:58passenger plane isn't getting anywhere

1:19:01in eastern so you're not going to hover

1:19:03your like anti-gravity orbit over the

1:19:07center of the city if you don't want

1:19:09them to know that you're here you just

1:19:11change your anti-gravity orbit into the

1:19:14shape of a 747 and you make it very loud

1:19:18and you fly it right over the top of all

1:19:21the people you want to drive through a

1:19:23factory in the middle of the night you

1:19:24don't go through a fucking clown car you

1:19:26get a blue van you drive through like a

1:19:28gentleman nobody needs to wave you

1:19:29through your not in a black jetta you

1:19:31are in a blue van

1:19:32likewise we should have said that I

1:19:35related and so I'm lying in bed and I up

1:19:37with you know with various powders on my

1:19:40person didn't I person and I'm thinking

1:19:43to myself you know this is just a little

1:19:46too sensible what I'm saying right now

1:19:50and and I had to I had to quiet the

1:19:57growing feeling I was having that maybe

1:19:59people were living in the center of the

1:20:01earth

1:20:03how would a disguise that they would

1:20:06pretend that they would pretend that

1:20:07they're trolls or hobbits are some kind

1:20:09of what we have in middle-earth John who

1:20:10lives in middle earth is that what is

1:20:12that where the hobbits live everybody

1:20:14lives in middle-earth even the humans

1:20:15lived there before the elves window

1:20:17across the ocean

1:20:19I guess number 5 elves and stuff LOL is

1:20:25this right where is the shower is the

1:20:27shower inside of the earth

1:20:28shire well actually like a token guy the

1:20:32shower is not inside the earth know the

1:20:34Shires so the heights don't live in

1:20:36middle-earth middle-earth only means

1:20:39that it was in between the one place in

1:20:44the other place

1:20:44Oh like Midgard at it

1:20:46is to ask card okay right so it wasn't

1:20:49inside the earth know the shower was

1:20:51just in the shower was really merry old

1:20:53England let's be honest okay and but

1:20:54they have their own son there at least

1:20:55theoretically is I think it's the same

1:20:58Sun I think it's like it never gets the

1:21:00battlestar galactica of cosmology it

1:21:02happened a long long time ago

1:21:05oh you can you can cover up a lot of a

1:21:08lot of Earth related inconsistencies by

1:21:09putting it someplace else happened a

1:21:11long time ago for instance a long long

1:21:13time ago it was a regular occurrence for

1:21:16God to come down to earth and meddle in

1:21:19people's like what they were eating and

1:21:21and where he was like kill your kid

1:21:24oh no ya don't kill your kid haha oh

1:21:27kill him nope don't so he was dressed up

1:21:29like a bush for Moses when he came to

1:21:31Abraham so to speak now he's just a

1:21:34voice now the Rams in the thicket or the

1:21:35physical silver the thicket but that was

1:21:37just a voice of God telling him to kill

1:21:39his child I but the thing is that and

1:21:41that's the guy who started all religions

1:21:43they got three religions based on the

1:21:44guy who thought he should kill this kid

1:21:45has a voice told him that's right well

1:21:48and the and the problem is that this God

1:21:50are routinely a said confusing things to

1:21:54people but it was a long time ago and so

1:21:58it makes perfect sense because it was a

1:22:01long time ago old testament got kind of

1:22:03a dick Old Testament God is a soup dream

1:22:08asshole

1:22:09yeah he's really terrible and you know

1:22:11what New Testament God also very

1:22:13confusing

1:22:14it could be he could be a little uneven

1:22:15my friend Dave did a very funny on radio

1:22:18play based on job it was very very funny

1:22:21and but I mean the closing line was so

1:22:23what is the lesson of Joe likes to pitch

1:22:25your friends are dicks and God's a

1:22:27bettin man haha job is a pretty rough

1:22:31rough slog if you really hear about it

1:22:34it really is it really hard that some

1:22:36people find that such an inspiring thing

1:22:38is very very troubling to me into that

1:22:40makes you are a problem like as on a

1:22:42daily basis like what am I going to do

1:22:43today

1:22:44what's on my to-do list of jobs ass boy

1:22:47I could really you know using job as a

1:22:49model I could oh boy I could really go a

1:22:51lot of different directions but but

1:22:53honestly the the New Testament thing I

1:22:56mean a lot of the stuff in the New

1:22:57Testament is very smart it's it so it's

1:22:59wonderful

1:23:00the book I highly recommend it you know

1:23:02what the brand hi I'm almost touching

1:23:04that third rail

1:23:05I'm very close i get very frustrated

1:23:06about the Gospels because i think it's a

1:23:08goddamn shame

1:23:09yeah I'm it's a goddamn shame Hollis I

1:23:12might have to cut this out again Arn I

1:23:13you know what we're gonna do more name

1:23:15fame taking well I'm just saying I mean

1:23:18you know you don't have to be you know

1:23:20Heraclitus to dip into the river you

1:23:22know saying do hear what you're saying I

1:23:25was not all of it sounded like the

1:23:26description of an egg it woman that you

1:23:28know from the on the wikipedia page for

1:23:30eighty eight precepts ok what is it i

1:23:33think i sent to hear em assists yeah

1:23:35it's an essay or manifesto let's make up

1:23:37our minds white supremacist written by

1:23:39David Lane who has two first names

1:23:41this is because of high Hitler h8 letter

1:23:46of the alphabet ABC let's 8888 is

1:23:49totally code i'm using white supremacist

1:23:51now the important thing that you need to

1:23:53know is that i pasted this into the

1:23:54wrong window and right after my wife had

1:23:56sent me a beautiful thing my daughter

1:23:57made I sent her a link to think about

1:24:00white supremacy we have to be careful

1:24:04and not Jerry I'm gonna be careful the

1:24:07internet what you said people are gonna

1:24:09send him a little diagram of you making

1:24:11horse another another picture of my team

1:24:15is this is awkward i know they seem

1:24:19especially since I was sticking like

1:24:21pins and needles in it if you see my

1:24:23horse head somebody sent me know

1:24:26somebody said your said well i'm missing

1:24:28you have not mr. Walt sense now know

1:24:30somebody uh of a friend of a friend of

1:24:35entry is freaky

1:24:38I have this as bill most hey you've met

1:24:42bill w uh here he was gone before I love

1:24:45to have a drink with that guy sometimes

1:24:46a little dr. Bob to those two guys

1:24:48really had a muppet thing was dr. pop is

1:24:51he trying to build w dr bob was Bill WS

1:24:53first buddy we friend your friend Bill W

1:24:55on some level right

1:24:56oh yeah absolutely take it one day at a

1:24:58time I still do

1:25:00awesome ouch i almost put us on Twitter

1:25:02god dammit i got too much communication

1:25:04going on you know what you are social

1:25:06networking like out your yin yang

1:25:08it was clouding my tutor it's so hard

1:25:11for me right now to social network I

1:25:13really do yes this is very nice

1:25:15yeah that's something i had my Amazon

1:25:18wish list now you see my daughter where

1:25:21my daughter my daughter who runs around

1:25:22naked all the time I walked into the

1:25:24room and she goes I and she was a naked

1:25:274-year old was wearing this extreme i

1:25:29would say for a forty dollar product

1:25:31that is an extremely realistic Horsehead

1:25:33it's amazing and and i think it's it's

1:25:35there on a chair it scares the shit out

1:25:36of me if you were willing even you know

1:25:38even and this is a very tricky thing

1:25:41because as a father

1:25:43there's nothing wrong with you making a

1:25:46short film of your naked infant daughter

1:25:49running around water do not but when you

1:25:53try and sell that for ten thousand

1:25:54dollars to a Japanese collector right

1:25:56now you've crossed the line we're going

1:25:58to want to see if the horse because the

1:25:59Japanese laws

1:26:01well what have you sold it wrapped in

1:26:02the Horsehead uh hold z the collector no

1:26:08horse this whore said yet to have a

1:26:11meeting of the horse minds

1:26:12I don't know there's horse people I I

1:26:15joke about horses but look at those

1:26:17nostrils what do you think of that I

1:26:19think that's two more entry points than

1:26:21a human e

1:26:25like a speak at spankers

1:26:28[Music]