Roderick on the Line

Ep. 36: "Uncle Licky"


00:00:00   low aye jaan i'm rolling haha all [TS]

00:00:13   worthwhile button button i I'm fine [TS]

00:00:17   without the button personally I think [TS]

00:00:20   they get you get you get what you get [TS]

00:00:22   you do that's right you get what you get [TS]

00:00:24   how much you're paying for this podcast [TS]

00:00:25   is what i would ask that point they said [TS]

00:00:27   at that b'day circle at my daughter's [TS]

00:00:28   school when they give up when your kid [TS]

00:00:30   brings presents for everybody say you [TS]

00:00:32   get what you get and don't be upset [TS]

00:00:35   oh that's a nice added yeah it'sit's [TS]

00:00:37   both useful and passive aggressive like [TS]

00:00:39   so many reminds i would like to say that [TS]

00:00:41   to all the 40 year olds I know who are [TS]

00:00:43   like why aren't I ridge you get what you [TS]

00:00:46   get don't be upset you get what you get [TS]

00:00:49   boy you know John I that seems like that [TS]

00:00:52   might find a place I don't want I don't [TS]

00:00:54   want to try to you know circle [TS]

00:00:55   circumnavigate your ethos but I could [TS]

00:00:57   see that finding a place in your eat [TS]

00:00:59   this / get what you get and don't be [TS]

00:01:00   upset [TS]

00:01:01   right there that's the way I just said [TS]

00:01:04   it kind of takes on a I like the way you [TS]

00:01:07   said it a little tougher right yeah when [TS]

00:01:09   reno and teacher realization that you [TS]

00:01:10   get what you get and don't be upset when [TS]

00:01:13   you say well you get you get don't be [TS]

00:01:14   upset [TS]

00:01:15   that's right we get fatalism there's a [TS]

00:01:17   little bit of like well yeah it's a nice [TS]

00:01:20   mix of of your first obviously let me [TS]

00:01:23   say you're being helpful right there's [TS]

00:01:25   also there's a hint of resignation of [TS]

00:01:27   I've been there I've gotten and I've [TS]

00:01:29   been upset and I'm just telling you [TS]

00:01:31   there's a little bit of farm wisdom to a [TS]

00:01:33   to like shut up and I mean like what [TS]

00:01:36   like shut up shut up the paint system a [TS]

00:01:40   lot of farm system [TS]

00:01:41   yeah shut up is the is basically if that [TS]

00:01:45   is farm wisdom condensed 22 words shut [TS]

00:01:47   up i was hoping to go to the dance this [TS]

00:01:49   weekend can I plant the corn now shut up [TS]

00:01:51   shut up no one who ever lived on a farm [TS]

00:01:55   ever spoke that many words in one [TS]

00:01:59   sentence i think a stern the farmers [TS]

00:02:01   they are they have to be tested because [TS]

00:02:03   the wind is whipping down the planes [TS]

00:02:04   because there's they get up at dawn and [TS]

00:02:08   they eat 12,000 calories of gravy [TS]

00:02:11   biscuits [TS]

00:02:13   there's no room in them for like [TS]

00:02:16   chattiness yeah I mentioned once you get [TS]

00:02:19   on that tractor here on one sheet for a [TS]

00:02:20   lot of the time that's passed the turn [TS]

00:02:22   well youyou yeah yeah yeah I mean to [TS]

00:02:27   them hand signals or anything did that [TS]

00:02:28   other times people [TS]

00:02:29   well I mean obviously there's going to [TS]

00:02:30   be people i don't so handsome this is [TS]

00:02:32   obviously you can sometimes attracted [TS]

00:02:33   takes a hand but but occasionally it [TS]

00:02:35   seems like you would want to signal the [TS]

00:02:36   people like pot it's time for chow for [TS]

00:02:39   that last night / hate myself for that [TS]

00:02:40   ok or i want to go to I want to go to [TS]

00:02:43   the dance kind of plant the corn there's [TS]

00:02:44   a bell for that Isabel for that [TS]

00:02:46   yeah mark comes out on the porch and she [TS]

00:02:48   rings that i want to go to the dance [TS]

00:02:50   bail because it shut up but is there [TS]

00:02:54   more than one Bell there's a whole [TS]

00:02:56   panoply of bells monopoly now on a boat [TS]

00:02:59   you have bells to tell what time it is [TS]

00:03:00   right you got so many bells [TS]

00:03:02   that's right ok and said I had a farm [TS]

00:03:04   you have different tones of bells [TS]

00:03:06   plastic Mandarin yet to ask different [TS]

00:03:08   questions that's right it's a total [TS]

00:03:09   length okay but and Paul I my sense of [TS]

00:03:12   see now i'm speculating a lot of this [TS]

00:03:15   because although my mom grew up on a [TS]

00:03:16   farm i did not i guess that's close [TS]

00:03:18   enough she's right you spot a lot of [TS]

00:03:20   shut up that you know what if i may say [TS]

00:03:22   she's never said shut up [TS]

00:03:24   yeah but she's put that value to your [TS]

00:03:25   home and she knows that she has said you [TS]

00:03:27   go to get adobe website didn't want to [TS]

00:03:29   be the one to say it that seems I think [TS]

00:03:32   he can just say that you know what makes [TS]

00:03:33   that effective as she never fucking [TS]

00:03:35   needs to say it's the difference in the [TS]

00:03:36   room like get my my sense from her is [TS]

00:03:39   that her grandpa really never said [TS]

00:03:41   anything he just he just communicated [TS]

00:03:45   through the furrows his brow em in the [TS]

00:03:47   furrows were frozen in his brow [TS]

00:03:50   mimicking the furrows of the land [TS]

00:03:52   deepest corn that he worked his life [TS]

00:03:54   work this whole life by you get to be [TS]

00:03:57   really full of shit when you're on a [TS]

00:03:58   farm yeah well I think I mean look at [TS]

00:04:01   the music of John Cougar Mellencamp it [TS]

00:04:03   is the music of the full of shit side of [TS]

00:04:05   having grown up on a farm [TS]

00:04:07   it has anything to do with the the [TS]

00:04:10   production that that when scotland does [TS]

00:04:12   your record is that make you look [TS]

00:04:13   foolish farmer no no offense no offense [TS]

00:04:16   and scholars sky big Scotland is just [TS]

00:04:19   bringing out their the intrinsic full [TS]

00:04:22   fitness in his artists do additional [TS]

00:04:24   thank you so much really [TS]

00:04:25   having the reverb for my liking that was [TS]

00:04:27   a style the river people you know I [TS]

00:04:30   remember the first band I was in the guy [TS]

00:04:31   said I don't want any reverb on this [TS]

00:04:33   well I no reverb is is something we [TS]

00:04:35   don't talk about anything that's in the [TS]

00:04:36   phil collins pile but this does get us [TS]

00:04:38   back to the village old problem i'm [TS]

00:04:40   willing to open the gate [TS]

00:04:41   the farm gate on Billy Joel because [TS]

00:04:42   that's a certain kind of full of [TS]

00:04:43   shittiness but on a farm it seems like [TS]

00:04:45   you've earned it [TS]

00:04:46   you lost you lost a hand you've had some [TS]

00:04:48   very heavy meals you own a tractor and [TS]

00:04:50   you don't talk much it seems you've [TS]

00:04:51   learned that if you feel like a real [TS]

00:04:53   talky guy with the least time fucking [TS]

00:04:54   brandy snifter on your piano I'm not [TS]

00:04:56   sure you're qualified to make sure [TS]

00:04:57   whoever qualified to say shut up [TS]

00:04:59   well then you're when you're discounting [TS]

00:05:01   the ability of all the people who live [TS]

00:05:03   in cities to say shut up and i don't [TS]

00:05:05   think you can do that they just have a [TS]

00:05:06   different shut up my gosh at apt anymore [TS]

00:05:10   she a nap me but that's pretty flaccid [TS]

00:05:13   compared to heard about the hard hard [TS]

00:05:16   shut up of a man whose whose feeder in [TS]

00:05:21   the earth like the roots of a tree while [TS]

00:05:23   you you really do you wax and earth he [TS]

00:05:25   called waxing bikini wax pretty poetic [TS]

00:05:26   I've about this bullshit farm stuff [TS]

00:05:28   well I mean the problem is that farmers [TS]

00:05:32   frankly are the parts are always the [TS]

00:05:35   problem in any culture this is what they [TS]

00:05:37   say they say the single we think we've [TS]

00:05:39   had this discussion just a little bit [TS]

00:05:40   they say this the single worst thing to [TS]

00:05:43   ever happen in Western civilization or [TS]

00:05:45   otherwise agriculture it all starts with [TS]

00:05:48   that all goes back to agriculture [TS]

00:05:49   everything today always got the worst [TS]

00:05:51   thing that could happen is agriculture [TS]

00:05:53   yes yes and I'm not your imagine if we [TS]

00:05:56   were still just living on what we found [TS]

00:05:59   in the stomach contents of a squirrel [TS]

00:06:01   that's a squirrel [TS]

00:06:04   well you see the squirrel you know how [TS]

00:06:05   big they are I don't mind a Paleolithic [TS]

00:06:07   squirrel now a little squirrels are any [TS]

00:06:10   bigger [TS]

00:06:11   show me show me the natural history [TS]

00:06:14   museum diorama about Paleolithic [TS]

00:06:17   squirrel that's bigger than a cat like i [TS]

00:06:19   said i'm not going to keep on like a [TS]

00:06:20   search right now but you know what I'm [TS]

00:06:21   gonna write that down find funding to [TS]

00:06:24   join a squirrel do squirrels prehistoric [TS]

00:06:27   squirrels were probably smaller not [TS]

00:06:29   bigger than you might think that's an [TS]

00:06:30   annotation we can expect the screws to [TS]

00:06:32   keep getting bigger [TS]

00:06:33   squirrels are getting bigger I yeah i [TS]

00:06:35   think if you were out like with a [TS]

00:06:37   blunderbuss [TS]

00:06:38   homemade at fonarow and you're hunting [TS]

00:06:41   squirrels and you found a squirrel and [TS]

00:06:44   ate the stomach contents of ice role as [TS]

00:06:47   you would have done to get grain that's [TS]

00:06:50   all the agriculture we need these are [TS]

00:06:52   not the kind of grain about their kind [TS]

00:06:54   of nut squirrels eat all kinds of stuff [TS]

00:06:55   is that right sir [TS]

00:06:57   they know the small or large squirrels [TS]

00:06:59   are they are there the bane of the [TS]

00:07:01   farmer I'm just saying that before [TS]

00:07:03   agriculture was invented we were [TS]

00:07:05   probably just eating squirrel stomach [TS]

00:07:07   contents to get our grains [TS]

00:07:10   hmm and you know you probably make a [TS]

00:07:13   halfway decent pancake out of what's [TS]

00:07:14   inside a squirrel [TS]

00:07:15   well yeah especially random with your [TS]

00:07:17   pointer bus wagon I bet the farmers have [TS]

00:07:20   a lot of excitement and blunderbusses [TS]

00:07:22   blunders i pronounce it blunder by [TS]

00:07:24   funded by the time we have those we also [TS]

00:07:27   had agriculture agriculture can for [TS]

00:07:29   tooling way too late that plan guessing [TS]

00:07:30   that farmers I have a lot of existential [TS]

00:07:32   Baines just one that captured so far [TS]

00:07:34   you've got large or very small squirrels [TS]

00:07:36   you've got children like to dance right [TS]

00:07:39   you that talking and you've got the [TS]

00:07:41   occasional maybe lack of a ballot what [TS]

00:07:43   if the squirrel came and stole your [TS]

00:07:43   fucking bail or the wrong tone of Bel [TS]

00:07:46   what if somebody come some guy on an [TS]

00:07:48   itinerant Bell salesman comes and sells [TS]

00:07:51   your your farm wife a bell [TS]

00:07:54   she starts to employ that day he warned [TS]

00:07:56   her he warned her without saying saying [TS]

00:07:58   so never spend money he want her with [TS]

00:08:00   with his for us [TS]

00:08:01   sure he did and then he's out on his [TS]

00:08:03   tractor here's an unfamiliar bell and he [TS]

00:08:06   thinks my wife is having sex with [TS]

00:08:07   someone or you know it communicates like [TS]

00:08:10   a thing that [TS]

00:08:11   oh that stinks you know it is it's it's [TS]

00:08:13   a rural perfect when you hear a [TS]

00:08:16   different fucking Bell you know your [TS]

00:08:17   wife has been jacking mean bonus [TS]

00:08:19   somebody there's no question about in [TS]

00:08:21   bone what a terrible phrase yeah and the [TS]

00:08:23   thing is if it's the wrong Bell you [TS]

00:08:24   might never come in because you're going [TS]

00:08:25   to work from candle can't still can't [TS]

00:08:27   Han Seok and the Bell doesn't ring or [TS]

00:08:29   armless son isn't leaving you with his [TS]

00:08:31   dance corn you're gonna you're going to [TS]

00:08:32   stay on that fucking tractor and you may [TS]

00:08:34   never get to pinch love you can just [TS]

00:08:36   stay in the field and something hard [TS]

00:08:37   life in the field now is that something [TS]

00:08:39   you can do with your farmer know your [TS]

00:08:41   shit-filled am so far more center field [TS]

00:08:46   we are a philosophy podcast up a well as [TS]

00:08:50   a Hobbesian it that but yes farmer shit [TS]

00:08:54   and fields all the time if you'll notice [TS]

00:08:55   most farms have windbreaks which are [TS]

00:09:01   groupings of trees that are left to keep [TS]

00:09:05   the wind from blowing the fields away [TS]

00:09:06   this is why the the dustbowl happened [TS]

00:09:08   because they tore down all their [TS]

00:09:10   windbreaks because they were greedy [TS]

00:09:12   greedy farmers was going to sell the [TS]

00:09:15   brakes [TS]

00:09:17   no they wanted to plow all the land [TS]

00:09:19   planning on seeing bad farmers anyway [TS]

00:09:22   the wind breaks are places where you [TS]

00:09:23   dump your old model a car or you take a [TS]

00:09:27   shit like an old bell or yeah you gotta [TS]

00:09:32   break the idea that was that they were [TS]

00:09:34   the bell you want to keep the bell as [TS]

00:09:35   long as you can write you don't go bad i [TS]

00:09:38   have bells that are super old man you [TS]

00:09:40   sure about what about bell in [TS]

00:09:42   philadelphia you can think that thing [TS]

00:09:45   was a father said that said that thing [TS]

00:09:46   back there are a lot of old bells but [TS]

00:09:49   smaller than expected is less [TS]

00:09:50   smaller-than-expected well you just have [TS]

00:09:53   that American inflation ism your land [TS]

00:09:55   it's the Liberty Bell is going to be [TS]

00:09:56   huge it's going to be the size of me the [TS]

00:09:59   like the world's biggest pumpkin but [TS]

00:10:00   it's not typing sighs clean again it's [TS]

00:10:03   like a normal super large pumpkin who [TS]

00:10:05   Liberty i don't i don't want to work [TS]

00:10:07   ping-pong John but i I just I at the [TS]

00:10:11   farmers are not interested [TS]

00:10:12   I've no interest in farms or farmers and [TS]

00:10:15   setting aside that they literally ruin [TS]

00:10:16   the entire Earth they are they have from [TS]

00:10:19   farmers are inherently conservative and [TS]

00:10:22   that's where you get nationalism boy and [TS]

00:10:25   that's where he ran the two but that's [TS]

00:10:27   quickly that the Nazis right i mean all [TS]

00:10:29   starts with the far you're saying you're [TS]

00:10:31   saying if I understand you correctly yes [TS]

00:10:32   there is a basis in in in Roman culture [TS]

00:10:36   and certainly in all variety of dramatic [TS]

00:10:39   mythology but really it all comes down [TS]

00:10:40   to attend agrarian sense of genocide is [TS]

00:10:43   that what goes back to basically ok [TS]

00:10:45   huh that's the kitchens come through and [TS]

00:10:48   the rigging they're wrong sounding bells [TS]

00:10:50   and and it just gets people mad and [TS]

00:10:52   stuff we don't need asking us to talk [TS]

00:10:54   right prosthetic hands lot of felt a lot [TS]

00:10:57   of early Bell sellers [TS]

00:10:59   were members of the tribe all there's no [TS]

00:11:02   question about it [TS]

00:11:03   I think it's all right there in [TS]

00:11:05   Deuteronomy probably you know here's the [TS]

00:11:09   thing I i we gonna be I know right haha [TS]

00:11:13   you call that an attacker but um I yeah [TS]

00:11:18   I think it really is or i'm sorry and i [TS]

00:11:20   just ate so much hollandaise sauce it's [TS]

00:11:23   early why are you eating hollandaise [TS]

00:11:24   sauce for breakfast [TS]

00:11:26   that's not a breakfast for me I could [TS]

00:11:28   come back to farms away where you you [TS]

00:11:30   were eating eggs benedict it was a kind [TS]

00:11:33   of Benedict it was a lie it was a very [TS]

00:11:35   of the hybrid kind of California [TS]

00:11:37   Florentine it was yes it was eggs and [TS]

00:11:39   yes those English muffin and everything [TS]

00:11:40   else was just you know they don't know [TS]

00:11:42   fuck all about making these things it [TS]

00:11:43   was I had spinach spinach and eggs and [TS]

00:11:46   hollandaise and I had a crap kick a crab [TS]

00:11:49   cake crab cake in your your mother's day [TS]

00:11:50   brunch [TS]

00:11:51   shut up about got a menu is that i was i [TS]

00:11:57   was in a hurry i need the thing is if I [TS]

00:12:00   don't eat I get weird when you were in a [TS]

00:12:02   hurry that that that milk would take two [TS]

00:12:04   hours to prepare to be surprised i think [TS]

00:12:06   they think the crab cakes might be flash [TS]

00:12:07   frozen [TS]

00:12:07   I don't know it's fresh crab cake was a [TS]

00:12:10   trader joes mother-to-mother to get [TS]

00:12:12   breakfast what the microwave yeah yeah [TS]

00:12:16   update the club traitor moans unit [TS]

00:12:19   operators and everything's got like a [TS]

00:12:20   cute need a trader Jose where well you [TS]

00:12:25   know the first time I ever had [TS]

00:12:26   hollandaise sauce [TS]

00:12:27   this is the thing back in the seventies [TS]

00:12:29   the only time I saw Holliday sauce it [TS]

00:12:32   was it was on steak can it was all I [TS]

00:12:35   wanted this little one like that little [TS]

00:12:36   metal pouring things [TS]

00:12:38   yeah it's only recently that you see [TS]

00:12:40   that the only place you see holiday [TS]

00:12:41   saucisson english muffins and eggs using [TS]

00:12:45   the inconsistent ecosystem is getting [TS]

00:12:46   narrow around holidays to put it on now [TS]

00:12:48   used to put on down the asparagus [TS]

00:12:51   asparagus Eastern hollandaise sauce [TS]

00:12:52   right i think yeah I think people are [TS]

00:12:54   think people are starting to lose some [TS]

00:12:57   of the traditional usages of hollandaise [TS]

00:13:00   on that's a fucking that's a shame that [TS]

00:13:02   is a real bed [TS]

00:13:03   here's the thing i got power your lawn [TS]

00:13:05   mower is that right is a renewable [TS]

00:13:07   renewable resources now is it actually [TS]

00:13:08   from Dutch [TS]

00:13:09   so is the holidays in Holland i'm [TS]

00:13:12   guessing it's some kind of a Dutch pond [TS]

00:13:14   all owned a zoo [TS]

00:13:16   this is Kate and well-liked agent farmer [TS]

00:13:20   Cajun man describing where he got his [TS]

00:13:22   sauce forget that sauce hollandaise [TS]

00:13:27   yeah I don't have a catalog and I [TS]

00:13:30   imagine me but what is in hollandaise [TS]

00:13:32   sauce it's just it's just eggs and [TS]

00:13:34   mayonnaise and whipped cream and pepper [TS]

00:13:37   and I'm a man [TS]

00:13:40   yeah so I mean that that's it's [TS]

00:13:42   perfectly possible that it's got as I've [TS]

00:13:44   intelligence research has been a long [TS]

00:13:46   time since i made holidays I'm married [TS]

00:13:48   now right [TS]

00:13:48   so so what if we just take the meeting [TS]

00:13:51   hall today this other bachelors do [TS]

00:13:53   wow I mean my right now so I don't get [TS]

00:13:56   into that holidays shopping somehow this [TS]

00:13:58   might be a euphemism the rose from that [TS]

00:13:59   but not think we hit it too hard but I i [TS]

00:14:01   know its eggs it's for sure eggs right [TS]

00:14:03   now because it's an oil and it's got a [TS]

00:14:06   lemon and I think that tarragon I think [TS]

00:14:10   you should be very circumspect to use it [TS]

00:14:12   i'm not a farmer by any means [TS]

00:14:13   tarragon and cilantro I mean I think Eve [TS]

00:14:16   it really circumspect all those all [TS]

00:14:19   those uh well certainly I would put [TS]

00:14:21   cilantro and tarragon in the same family [TS]

00:14:23   of how to be careful you don't think so [TS]

00:14:25   i've memorized it's like to me it's like [TS]

00:14:26   the smiths like they're just gonna be [TS]

00:14:28   some people that don't like tarragon or [TS]

00:14:30   don't like the the cilantro cilantro [TS]

00:14:33   creeps up in a lot of surprising places [TS]

00:14:35   today [TS]

00:14:35   well tarragon is a thing where I think [TS]

00:14:37   yeah it's like fish sauce you put in a [TS]

00:14:39   little pinch of it and the food tastes [TS]

00:14:41   better be put in anymore and the food [TS]

00:14:44   just tastes like tarragon her exactly [TS]

00:14:46   exactly and a little on tro mm I think [TS]

00:14:50   you gotta leave it sparingly i would go [TS]

00:14:51   I would go out of the crazy go nuts on [TS]

00:14:54   msg long before I would ever dumped in a [TS]

00:14:57   lot of tarragon up a little bit of [TS]

00:14:58   tarragon and scrambled eggs not a lot is [TS]

00:15:01   your love msg agree with tarragon butBut [TS]

00:15:04   cilantros i think a different category [TS]

00:15:05   tell me what you put some water on you [TS]

00:15:07   have a taco [TS]

00:15:08   yeah i only use cilantro on on like [TS]

00:15:13   nouveau Mexican [TS]

00:15:16   I'm not gonna throw cilantro in any [TS]

00:15:18   other kind of food and if I if I show up [TS]

00:15:21   in a restaurant and i order something i [TS]

00:15:22   order eggs or something in the air [TS]

00:15:24   cilantro wanted to i get right up and I [TS]

00:15:28   walk into the kitchen and I grabbed the [TS]

00:15:30   chef and I put his face down on a hot [TS]

00:15:32   burner easy with that said let's face it [TS]

00:15:35   you don't you fuck are you doing back [TS]

00:15:38   here grab him by his stupid fucking so [TS]

00:15:40   hockey pushes face into the plate and [TS]

00:15:42   say what is this [TS]

00:15:43   now what is this out what is this it's [TS]

00:15:47   the cilantro cilantro what what are you [TS]

00:15:49   doing [TS]

00:15:50   I totally agree I'll boil the phony [TS]

00:15:53   baloney stuff you know usually parsley [TS]

00:15:54   that was I think that was the leading [TS]

00:15:56   edge of this is when they first started [TS]

00:15:57   putting that that crappy American [TS]

00:15:59   parsley on the side of things most [TS]

00:16:00   people still buy American parsley you [TS]

00:16:02   can get Italian parsley anywhere people [TS]

00:16:03   still buy American party like suckers my [TS]

00:16:06   grind it up and use it as a while using [TS]

00:16:10   it as my syringes ice cream huh [TS]

00:16:13   it's a witch hazel it has all of all the [TS]

00:16:15   all the shrinking properties by any of [TS]

00:16:17   the drying properties is so handy [TS]

00:16:20   sometimes it really got some witch hazel [TS]

00:16:22   my bathrooms up was reading I was [TS]

00:16:24   reading the witch hazel and it says on [TS]

00:16:25   the back it has absolutely no [TS]

00:16:28   application for how you're supposed to [TS]

00:16:29   use it i think people just know how [TS]

00:16:30   you're supposed to use witch hazel [TS]

00:16:31   yeah and on the back it's got the [TS]

00:16:33   original box time [TS]

00:16:35   hmm it says it says apply something [TS]

00:16:38   along the lines of applied directly [TS]

00:16:39   affected area but then it says if the [TS]

00:16:41   condition persists it doesn't it says [TS]

00:16:43   nothing about the condition is but if [TS]

00:16:45   the condition persists for more than two [TS]

00:16:46   weeks seek medical treatment for more [TS]

00:16:49   than two weeks right [TS]

00:16:50   I just love the idea that is extremely [TS]

00:16:52   specific no medical advice for condition [TS]

00:16:55   that has not been named if if you have a [TS]

00:16:57   crossbow bolt in your side but witch [TS]

00:17:00   hazel on it for two weeks if it's still [TS]

00:17:03   there ya go to a doctor she just put a [TS]

00:17:06   picture of a middle-aged woman on them [TS]

00:17:07   back winking and going you know what I [TS]

00:17:10   do with hydrogen peroxide sometimes I [TS]

00:17:12   idea i just poured in my bath [TS]

00:17:14   I just port port right in the bathtub [TS]

00:17:16   it's a font issues hydrogen peroxide [TS]

00:17:19   yeah yeah i use it i use it as a [TS]

00:17:21   mouthwash [TS]

00:17:22   I pour it on my head sometimes when I [TS]

00:17:24   when I when I have a [TS]

00:17:27   with my scalp itches i'll use our [TS]

00:17:29   hydrogen peroxide everywhere but it's [TS]

00:17:31   how I i I'm having a brain fart here [TS]

00:17:34   with hydrogen peroxide what's that was [TS]

00:17:37   the main on label use for what why do [TS]

00:17:39   people you by to clean a wound is that [TS]

00:17:40   would scare ya [TS]

00:17:41   ok hydrogen peroxide you portrayed on [TS]

00:17:44   your heads that refreshing it is [TS]

00:17:46   refreshing although I made the mistake [TS]

00:17:47   one time you know i had an itchy head [TS]

00:17:51   because I have a I have a condition [TS]

00:17:53   where I'm allergic to myself I'm sorry [TS]

00:17:57   yeah it's one of those things all that [TS]

00:17:59   means specifically are things I don't [TS]

00:18:01   talk about [TS]

00:18:01   yeah but you know if I don't like what I [TS]

00:18:05   don't think personally that a person [TS]

00:18:06   should wash their hair much more than [TS]

00:18:08   once a week that's my that's my phone [TS]

00:18:11   what happens if you do that you have to [TS]

00:18:13   wash it well and what has happened with [TS]

00:18:15   me is that I am I am allergic to my own [TS]

00:18:19   head oil and it gets my head starts to [TS]

00:18:23   hurt my wrist my scalp my skin gets [TS]

00:18:25   sensitive i don't want my hair you need [TS]

00:18:29   some kind of some kind of cranial [TS]

00:18:31   surfactant in order to not be allergic [TS]

00:18:33   to yourself you might you might you [TS]

00:18:34   might give yourself hives my hands get [TS]

00:18:37   allergic to themselves sometimes I have [TS]

00:18:39   you know it's it's selective outbreaks [TS]

00:18:41   of self allergy so you can set your [TS]

00:18:43   magically real i don't know buddy I [TS]

00:18:46   think you might be a very very short [TS]

00:18:48   Marquez story do you think that I could [TS]

00:18:50   one day just to send directly to heaven [TS]

00:18:52   I think you could fall out of heaven [TS]

00:18:53   with enormous wings or quiet [TS]

00:18:56   yeah that sounds fun discover ice but in [TS]

00:18:59   any case I mordekaiser feeling out of [TS]

00:19:01   Marquez references at this point you [TS]

00:19:03   know I've got a I've got about 10,000 [TS]

00:19:06   more but I'm not gonna use them [TS]

00:19:07   I poor hydroperoxide on my head and it [TS]

00:19:10   was like oh I got you know what kind of [TS]

00:19:12   relieved the the relieved the the I mean [TS]

00:19:15   it hurts a lot more at first but that's [TS]

00:19:18   kind of a good feeling you know that I [TS]

00:19:20   go that's good that's working [TS]

00:19:22   yeah that's how you know it's working [TS]

00:19:23   exactly but then I made the mistake of [TS]

00:19:25   going to bed without having rinse the [TS]

00:19:30   hydrogen peroxide out of my hair and [TS]

00:19:32   when I woke up in the morning my hair is [TS]

00:19:33   yellow this hydrogen peroxide will you [TS]

00:19:36   what they used to dye your hair actually [TS]

00:19:38   make ladies hair like blonde [TS]

00:19:40   yeah exactly so all of a sudden there [TS]

00:19:42   was and I was like oh it's the same [TS]

00:19:44   stuff I knew that hydrogen peroxide what [TS]

00:19:47   you used to dye her hair I just didn't [TS]

00:19:48   know it was the same stuff you buy at [TS]

00:19:50   the drugstore to put on your itchy scalp [TS]

00:19:52   was it like straw-colored oh yeah how [TS]

00:19:55   you like like butter popcorn [TS]

00:19:57   no my hair is already light and it just [TS]

00:20:01   lightened it more as a flattering [TS]

00:20:04   ah well the I was embarrassed to be [TS]

00:20:11   perceived as having died my hair [TS]

00:20:14   sure and so although it was not I did [TS]

00:20:17   not just like it was not unflattering I [TS]

00:20:20   i also felt the need to over explain to [TS]

00:20:23   people why my hair was a different color [TS]

00:20:25   and as you can imagine ninety percent of [TS]

00:20:28   the people that I ran into did not [TS]

00:20:29   notice my hair was deformed yeah you got [TS]

00:20:32   the the peroxide doth protest too much [TS]

00:20:34   it sounds to me like you're real concern [TS]

00:20:36   with you were maybe thinking of doing it [TS]

00:20:37   again [TS]

00:20:38   well exactly the once i had done it and [TS]

00:20:40   saw how easy it was you know I think a [TS]

00:20:42   lot of people if they put hydrogen [TS]

00:20:43   peroxide right on the top of their head [TS]

00:20:44   their hair turns purple or something you [TS]

00:20:46   know you have to or they feel like they [TS]

00:20:48   have to go to a salon and put the foil [TS]

00:20:50   in your hair and first ladies with long [TS]

00:20:53   fingernails and cost four hundred [TS]

00:20:55   dollars when you get having a bluing [TS]

00:20:57   agent because you don't want to write [TS]

00:20:58   exactly i think something like with old [TS]

00:21:00   ladies when your turn now ladies but you [TS]

00:21:02   know older ladies when your hair turns [TS]

00:21:04   gray but i guess the picture [TS]

00:21:07   no no no I wasn't calling you an old [TS]

00:21:09   lady was no I mean I'm sorry nearly dead [TS]

00:21:11   women my grandmother who's dead cricket [TS]

00:21:15   farm hookers you know I mean Bella Bella [TS]

00:21:21   back [TS]

00:21:22   Bell well mine that cow udders my [TS]

00:21:25   grandmother we go in and she went to one [TS]

00:21:28   of those places that was all nearly dead [TS]

00:21:29   lady's getting their hair done and they [TS]

00:21:31   put that stuff and I forget what it's [TS]

00:21:32   called but it's all I remember that [TS]

00:21:33   always wear gloves owner writer it's a [TS]

00:21:36   it is it's in like I remember if the [TS]

00:21:39   research it look like a like a takeout [TS]

00:21:41   place mustard thing except was really [TS]

00:21:43   like gray and they put it on with a [TS]

00:21:45   spatula or a tongue depressor yeah i [TS]

00:21:48   mean like yeah it's a term of art but [TS]

00:21:49   yea spatula and then and in this foil [TS]

00:21:51   and then [TS]

00:21:52   that would make your hair and then [TS]

00:21:53   sometimes you see blue-haired ladies [TS]

00:21:54   right yeah that's pretty ping pong but [TS]

00:21:56   that would make your hair is brassy I [TS]

00:21:59   think the problem is brassiness [TS]

00:22:00   craziness around your case i can see you [TS]

00:22:01   have a very large head and i could see i [TS]

00:22:03   could see that be really being [TS]

00:22:04   head-turning that your head but other [TS]

00:22:06   headsets he was it John Waters looks [TS]

00:22:07   good with that yellow hair the [TS]

00:22:09   brassiness is acquires is a quality that [TS]

00:22:11   comes if you are taking really dark hair [TS]

00:22:14   and dark trying to diet light but since [TS]

00:22:16   i already have light here it was not [TS]

00:22:18   brassy it looked very the the dollar [TS]

00:22:21   ninety-eight bottle of hydrogen peroxide [TS]

00:22:23   poured directly onto the head and then [TS]

00:22:25   left left overnight created a kind of [TS]

00:22:28   natural blonde pneus that was actually [TS]

00:22:31   very I i have to say it was very [TS]

00:22:34   appealing to me but i could not square [TS]

00:22:37   it with my overall sense that dying your [TS]

00:22:40   hair isn't it is a vanity that's [TS]

00:22:44   intolerable and intolerable vanity [TS]

00:22:47   really yeah so I walked around for the [TS]

00:22:49   rest of that that's probably felt like a [TS]

00:22:51   hypocrite [TS]

00:22:52   yeah I have this great blonde hair and [TS]

00:22:53   it caused me it probably cost me [TS]

00:22:55   twenty-five cents of hydrogen peroxide [TS]

00:22:57   to get it but after it grew out what is [TS]

00:23:02   it still happens I go into the bathroom [TS]

00:23:03   and look at the bottle of hydrogen [TS]

00:23:05   peroxide there on the on the same can i [TS]

00:23:07   go [TS]

00:23:08   maybe I should just pour it all over my [TS]

00:23:10   head and go to sleep and accidentally [TS]

00:23:12   dyed my hair again and then I go no it's [TS]

00:23:15   like satin bronze identity intolerant [TS]

00:23:17   vanity [TS]

00:23:18   ok we talked about this before you you [TS]

00:23:20   just keep liquor and cartons of [TS]

00:23:21   cigarettes around you so you probably [TS]

00:23:22   got bath salts you just keep it there [TS]

00:23:24   because it strengthens strengthens you [TS]

00:23:26   to know it's there and you're not using [TS]

00:23:27   it right you must stock up on hydrogen [TS]

00:23:29   peroxide just to go fuck you peroxide [TS]

00:23:31   shut up [TS]

00:23:32   alright i do have hydrogen peroxide all [TS]

00:23:34   over the house but it's because i use in [TS]

00:23:35   a variety of applications Navy SEALs my [TS]

00:23:37   dunno which are pouring it on my head [TS]

00:23:40   and accidentally done my hair my friend [TS]

00:23:42   Harry in college co-ed keep he had very [TS]

00:23:45   long hair actually it's like being able [TS]

00:23:46   to see me what you know his harem [TS]

00:23:49   actually he was Dutch harm front-end [TS]

00:23:52   renée's rapist and ready harem with two [TS]

00:23:55   hours not him harm Franz Hendrick Hmong [TS]

00:23:57   coerced [TS]

00:23:58   yeah that's a hell of a name is looking [TS]

00:24:01   over my name is duchess how he was super [TS]

00:24:02   tall yet long hair he looks like a cool [TS]

00:24:05   michael Stone [TS]

00:24:05   and really long curly hair and i will [TS]

00:24:08   stop pretty uncool in the eighties all I [TS]

00:24:10   liked when he was nervous I liked him [TS]

00:24:12   then that's my REM that's my eyes but I [TS]

00:24:14   was being facetious part was the coolest [TS]

00:24:16   thing in the world at that point shut up [TS]

00:24:17   he was no no I'm trying to get my [TS]

00:24:20   daughter not to say shut up and that I [TS]

00:24:21   think that's going to be a catch phrase [TS]

00:24:22   I think we're gonna start saying shut up [TS]

00:24:24   because of this show but in a farm voice [TS]

00:24:26   shut up you get what you get and don't [TS]

00:24:28   be upset but but Harry taught me [TS]

00:24:31   something that at first like so many [TS]

00:24:33   other things that have become important [TS]

00:24:34   in my life [TS]

00:24:35   eventually I was resistant and he said [TS]

00:24:37   here's the problem he says you go in [TS]

00:24:38   there first of all about the cheapest [TS]

00:24:40   shampoo you could get which I think at [TS]

00:24:41   the time was like why train and that [TS]

00:24:43   which now in retrospect sounds awful [TS]

00:24:44   especially given the consistency by [TS]

00:24:47   train [TS]

00:24:47   yeah I had a girlfriend smell like Rain [TS]

00:24:49   Man is that a euphemism for semen see [TS]

00:24:52   that's again a little hard [TS]

00:24:54   alright um sir literally literally [TS]

00:24:56   understand now i got i got the [TS]

00:24:58   hollandaise not yet now i'm getting at [TS]

00:25:00   the holidays on the side [TS]

00:25:02   I'm gonna send your photo this is a [TS]

00:25:04   photo my hollandaise because even after [TS]

00:25:06   i used a little bit of hollandaise on my [TS]

00:25:08   eggs i think i have about two cups of [TS]

00:25:10   hollandaise left in this thing [TS]

00:25:11   let's get you got no mejor you went to a [TS]

00:25:13   place like an airport and got some chili [TS]

00:25:15   like that like not like a big she like a [TS]

00:25:17   side chili like a sandwich and a chilly [TS]

00:25:19   it's not the size of hollandaise you [TS]

00:25:22   have that much holidays what in your [TS]

00:25:24   fridge so you know your present don't [TS]

00:25:26   take it outside one of my fucking house [TS]

00:25:28   I don't want in the office is alright it [TS]

00:25:29   it doesn't keep yeah well yeah and I [TS]

00:25:31   don't like rocks i don't staring at me [TS]

00:25:32   all day you told me that you had a [TS]

00:25:34   couple holidays the red you could have [TS]

00:25:36   put on your eggs and you left it off [TS]

00:25:39   here's the thing i had probably two to [TS]

00:25:43   six tablespoons of hollandaise sauce and [TS]

00:25:46   now I'm not a I'm not a mathematician i [TS]

00:25:48   think i had up to 16 6 tablespoons yeah [TS]

00:25:51   yeah it's a range and it was felt like a [TS]

00:25:54   lot of fucking holidays and still like [TS]

00:25:56   barely put a dent in it and you know how [TS]

00:25:58   it is i mean this is the part of America [TS]

00:25:59   this is a problem with agriculture the [TS]

00:26:01   large plate right America is a large [TS]

00:26:02   plate and it feels like we have to fill [TS]

00:26:04   the plate and this is what we knocked on [TS]

00:26:05   our windbreaks right right yeah yeah [TS]

00:26:07   yeah [TS]

00:26:08   and so anyway I hear what Harry said was [TS]

00:26:11   harm front Hendrick course he said your [TS]

00:26:13   problem is you're like all these other [TS]

00:26:15   suckers you wash your hair every day [TS]

00:26:17   you know what happens when you wash your [TS]

00:26:19   hair every day you have to wash your [TS]

00:26:22   hair every day can i say carmex did you [TS]

00:26:25   ever go through a carmax phase sure I [TS]

00:26:27   good what happens you so hold this is [TS]

00:26:29   nice [TS]

00:26:29   this smells like vanilla you know you [TS]

00:26:30   know comics is it's wax and aspirin [TS]

00:26:33   did you know that no salas [TS]

00:26:35   acetylsalicylic acid which is so fun to [TS]

00:26:38   say [TS]

00:26:38   acetylsalicylic acid and basically a [TS]

00:26:40   waxy base and it smells like vanilla you [TS]

00:26:42   put it on your lips and you know I [TS]

00:26:44   screen for chapped lips because it's [TS]

00:26:45   putting a spring directly on your cracks [TS]

00:26:47   all right to start off nice and center [TS]

00:26:49   acts also really fever blisters and cold [TS]

00:26:51   sores can't break take that off the [TS]

00:26:53   label is ridiculous [TS]

00:26:54   does nothing for that do you know what [TS]

00:26:55   the solution to thank you for blisters [TS]

00:26:57   and colts were hopping etoys popping you [TS]

00:27:00   got me on the popping now you go into it [TS]

00:27:02   like a man [TS]

00:27:02   popping and alcohol and then suck it up [TS]

00:27:05   does it work [TS]

00:27:06   sure yet works it hurts like a [TS]

00:27:08   motherfucker but yea culture goes away [TS]

00:27:09   get it done well you know my mom's my [TS]

00:27:11   mom's philosophy about a fever blisters [TS]

00:27:13   or stress bumps just about the sitcom [TS]

00:27:15   india is that she takes a hot a [TS]

00:27:19   hairdryer and she points the hairdryer [TS]

00:27:22   writer lip until she can't stand it [TS]

00:27:26   anymore and she can stand it for a [TS]

00:27:29   really long time at yeah and then she [TS]

00:27:31   takes a break and then she points the [TS]

00:27:32   head writer face again she's got a [TS]

00:27:34   pretty well defined schedule she [TS]

00:27:35   probably will make time in that and how [TS]

00:27:37   long we talking about 34 seconds as long [TS]

00:27:40   as she can hold it until the burning [TS]

00:27:42   look the hot air face burning you can't [TS]

00:27:46   be can't take it everybody clock on it [TS]

00:27:47   when she does that i don't know i don't [TS]

00:27:49   want to watch it it's so you know when [TS]

00:27:50   somebody is doctoring the stress bump [TS]

00:27:52   that's your private time [TS]

00:27:54   yeah yeah so she believes she believes [TS]

00:27:57   that the hairdryers the solution i [TS]

00:27:58   believe that the aggressive popping is [TS]

00:28:00   the salute you taught me this now and [TS]

00:28:02   this is going to be four people don't [TS]

00:28:03   like coughing closer popping is probably [TS]

00:28:05   i just want to say that there are people [TS]

00:28:06   out there who suffer in silence then i [TS]

00:28:08   would like I would like to just finish [TS]

00:28:10   the thread on farms and hair and then i [TS]

00:28:12   would like to do a deep dive on cold [TS]

00:28:13   sores if that's okay with you [TS]

00:28:15   that's fine i'm sure you haven't talked [TS]

00:28:17   about cold sores is very uncomfortable [TS]

00:28:18   for people [TS]

00:28:19   well yeah that's because it's suffering [TS]

00:28:20   in silence need to suffer loudly and [TS]

00:28:22   then shut up suffering in silence [TS]

00:28:23   because of the shame of socially [TS]

00:28:26   communicated to them and see them [TS]

00:28:28   this is the thing is there's there's [TS]

00:28:29   different guy I don't I've got all i've [TS]

00:28:31   got is the like my immune system socks [TS]

00:28:33   kind i don't have Schenker's on my wenis [TS]

00:28:35   contractors on the judging i'm not [TS]

00:28:38   judging but I've gone out with people [TS]

00:28:41   who had checkers on the weenus [TS]

00:28:42   the growlygus yeah they're girl with [TS]

00:28:45   long as it's not that time you know how [TS]

00:28:47   did you know how when did you first get [TS]

00:28:49   cold sores on your mouth high school and [TS]

00:28:51   what happened how did they get [TS]

00:28:53   communicated to you can like as in [TS]

00:28:55   communicable or how did they make the [TS]

00:28:57   right how did they express themselves [TS]

00:28:58   don't know how did they how do they [TS]

00:29:00   arrived upon you [TS]

00:29:02   who was the transmitter at oh no you can [TS]

00:29:04   see this is your problem cannot be gone [TS]

00:29:08   into the amount of time we have you two [TS]

00:29:09   got you a lot of fuckin problems John [TS]

00:29:10   everything but herpes knowing different [TS]

00:29:13   herpes of the kind that was in magazines [TS]

00:29:15   in the eighties know but it is a kind of [TS]

00:29:17   his herpes simplex one which is a [TS]

00:29:20   different simplex but it is still looks [TS]

00:29:22   a melanoma is a kind of cancer it really [TS]

00:29:24   over States it but that doesn't [TS]

00:29:25   overstate the the fact that it is a [TS]

00:29:28   thing which is communicated from one [TS]

00:29:30   person to another but you get mad at cat [TS]

00:29:32   when you got hurt when you when you have [TS]

00:29:33   your first her piece when you had your [TS]

00:29:36   SAS or she's back in the seventies or [TS]

00:29:39   whatever you are a nice cool it didn't [TS]

00:29:42   just take downs that what that she [TS]

00:29:43   didn't get it off of a treat and get [TS]

00:29:45   from licking a light pole [TS]

00:29:48   you got it because you kissed somebody [TS]

00:29:49   or drink out of addresses Les Ferdinand [TS]

00:29:51   is John this is like this is like you're [TS]

00:29:53   giving me some kind of like you give me [TS]

00:29:55   some kind of interrogation on how i got [TS]

00:29:57   a cold [TS]

00:29:57   yeah not getting a cold sore did you [TS]

00:30:01   kiss a bad girl kiss out of that girls [TS]

00:30:04   are there so many more that i wanted to [TS]

00:30:06   kiss out Donald hall drink milk out of a [TS]

00:30:10   milk carton that a bad girl had had to [TS]

00:30:12   have one just met a moment with you and [TS]

00:30:14   I'm not cutting this out [TS]

00:30:15   do you want to go directly into your [TS]

00:30:16   herpes talk or can I finish up forms in [TS]

00:30:18   here because okay you know what I'm [TS]

00:30:20   gonna finish up their mind never mind i [TS]

00:30:22   canno i'll talk about by blonde hair all [TS]

00:30:24   the time [TS]

00:30:25   okay first of all just to get out of the [TS]

00:30:26   way farming is bullshit second Harry [TS]

00:30:29   says that last with carmax you start [TS]

00:30:30   doing too much and needed what I say [TS]

00:30:32   this because John Roderick what is it [TS]

00:30:33   that you have to teach us [TS]

00:30:34   well one of the many things you have to [TS]

00:30:35   teach us is you gotta be careful because [TS]

00:30:37   during says it's pretty starts out [TS]

00:30:39   simple and if you do a few bumps of bath [TS]

00:30:40   salts [TS]

00:30:41   death and wash it down with a [TS]

00:30:42   boilermaker and then pretty soon you're [TS]

00:30:45   doing that a lot [TS]

00:30:46   mmm isn't that kind of is this something [TS]

00:30:48   that turns out your it's not inspiring [TS]

00:30:50   you to meet a student digital read about [TS]

00:30:52   that the face-eating see I'm not follow [TS]

00:30:54   the path you you taught me about as [TS]

00:30:55   often now it's everywhere ever since the [TS]

00:30:57   case either guy was just on the [TS]

00:30:58   marijuana he had never had a pass to get [TS]

00:31:01   the munchies [TS]

00:31:03   yeah that's it [TS]

00:31:07   that could have been carrying hydrogen [TS]

00:31:08   peroxide with him everything could have [TS]

00:31:09   been different he had some other things [TS]

00:31:12   really eat his face or did he just liked [TS]

00:31:13   by them on the nose or something i [TS]

00:31:15   didn't really like you is amazing off [TS]

00:31:17   I don't think that's a pot thing that [TS]

00:31:19   doesn't like having the CIA would plant [TS]

00:31:21   you know I've smoked a lot of marijuana [TS]

00:31:24   yeah and I haven't yet whatever why I'm [TS]

00:31:26   heart you can't be in the CIA [TS]

00:31:28   that's right that is exactly why you [TS]

00:31:30   don't want to get that close to somebody [TS]

00:31:32   you want to get a pot add CIA guy if [TS]

00:31:34   you're gonna do a plant for a story like [TS]

00:31:36   that it's gonna have to be more credible [TS]

00:31:37   than that i'm sorry guy on offer and [TS]

00:31:39   smoke and party somebody's face I don't [TS]

00:31:40   think so [TS]

00:31:41   that's right i think i bet some somebody [TS]

00:31:43   like you know what's great story it [TS]

00:31:44   doesn't even make any sense so many [TS]

00:31:46   helicopter shot a dart at him the whole [TS]

00:31:48   that was full of some secret new mind [TS]

00:31:52   control device and it caused him to go [TS]

00:31:55   crazy take his clothes off and eat some [TS]

00:31:56   homeless man's face [TS]

00:31:58   that's it has nothing at all to do you [TS]

00:32:00   like he's homeless [TS]

00:32:01   the guy whose face got even one sample [TS]

00:32:04   ok alright um I & M here's the thing [TS]

00:32:08   Paul Island I'm really glad that you're [TS]

00:32:10   buying any veterans bongos and and Jimi [TS]

00:32:13   Hendrix's cup but in my work Paul Allen [TS]

00:32:15   and I'm so glad that i'm not i would [TS]

00:32:16   take some of those ample resources he's [TS]

00:32:18   got some of that yacht money and I like [TS]

00:32:21   this thread you were addressing him [TS]

00:32:23   directly as though he were a listener of [TS]

00:32:24   the spot for those people who google [TS]

00:32:26   something land on a page and starts [TS]

00:32:28   talking like that person is there a paul [TS]

00:32:31   allen listen when you just happened but [TS]

00:32:33   is actually happens i'm pretty pissed at [TS]

00:32:35   this point that happens a lot on the [TS]

00:32:36   Internet where somebody will mention [TS]

00:32:37   Oprah on a web page and then the common [TS]

00:32:39   people will go up ride that gets really [TS]

00:32:41   disappointing that you ended your show [TS]

00:32:42   oh my god is that helps it helps you [TS]

00:32:46   understand so many things so much better [TS]

00:32:47   when you understand that people actually [TS]

00:32:49   think they're talking to James Dean on a [TS]

00:32:50   webpage [TS]

00:32:52   you are such a great actor who come back [TS]

00:32:55   from the dead you think you'll never [TS]

00:32:57   make suddenly last summer to I I i think [TS]

00:33:00   i think farmer I think farming is [TS]

00:33:02   bullshit [TS]

00:33:03   yeah I think you should wash your hair [TS]

00:33:04   too much because then it gets like [TS]

00:33:05   CarMax and you gotta do it all the time [TS]

00:33:07   but i think the bath salts thing sounds [TS]

00:33:09   like that sounds like some kind of a [TS]

00:33:11   where they call that a mock-up a mash-up [TS]

00:33:13   asset on the where they call it starts [TS]

00:33:15   to set up a setup was the word for that [TS]

00:33:17   a mash-up horse up and my horse up about [TS]

00:33:21   a fight and now the thing is this is [TS]

00:33:23   something that you also think somehow [TS]

00:33:24   that cold sores are just looking like a [TS]

00:33:27   cold if you think it's a cold but you [TS]

00:33:30   get because somebody sneezes on you in a [TS]

00:33:32   supermarket [TS]

00:33:33   this may be our sound of music moments [TS]

00:33:35   on this may be the moment when we sing [TS]

00:33:37   Edelweiss and walk off the stage i'm [TS]

00:33:38   just about fucking done with you i know [TS]

00:33:40   i was very uncool just like old sword it [TS]

00:33:43   doesn't have to be from a dirty girl [TS]

00:33:44   this is why people don't talk about cold [TS]

00:33:47   sores because anywhere you were all mr. [TS]

00:33:49   like let's talk about him let him know [TS]

00:33:50   that he's the best-looking look look [TS]

00:33:52   it's on two cards [TS]

00:33:54   let's get him out of the closet and then [TS]

00:33:56   I start talking about here like wow now [TS]

00:33:58   back in the closet question yes i know [TS]

00:34:01   we can't talk about this yet because [TS]

00:34:02   it's not a thing but will you know what [TS]

00:34:04   i'm talking about if I refer to the [TS]

00:34:06   thing the thing that we're doing [TS]

00:34:09   yes ok i went and did some research on [TS]

00:34:12   the thing do you think the paul allen [TS]

00:34:14   will be at the thing probably not i can [TS]

00:34:18   reach but where we could potentially [TS]

00:34:19   reach influencers like pilot very close [TS]

00:34:22   to Paul well okay here's the thing you [TS]

00:34:25   got the United England you know that [TS]

00:34:27   phony baloney system of government over [TS]

00:34:29   there it's like a Russian waters makes [TS]

00:34:31   no fucking sense now we have a queen but [TS]

00:34:33   then we vote to okay fine she has no [TS]

00:34:35   power but she has a lot of money going [TS]

00:34:37   to vote people into the tower of london [TS]

00:34:39   yeah exchequer what the fuck is an ex [TS]

00:34:41   checker it's a term account it's made up [TS]

00:34:44   an excuse to get a comptroller okay so [TS]

00:34:46   here's the thing you think that you got [TS]

00:34:48   that you've got the cabinet and you get [TS]

00:34:49   the shadow cabinet [TS]

00:34:50   ok so now i don't know what that means [TS]

00:34:52   but I think we need a shadow CIA I think [TS]

00:34:55   you could identify the way I'm sorry I'm [TS]

00:34:56   saying any of this because as you know [TS]

00:34:57   we're probably gonna have all kinds of [TS]

00:34:58   problems down because a shadow CIA h [TS]

00:35:02   can we go ahead ok NSA the NSA is a [TS]

00:35:06   shadow CIA [TS]

00:35:07   oh they're like the Deep Web the dark [TS]

00:35:08   the black lab where they cost sorry tink [TS]

00:35:10   ya what do you wanna do we have [TS]

00:35:11   something to talk about is it the second [TS]

00:35:13   internet the dark web [TS]

00:35:15   I don't ever talk about the dark web [TS]

00:35:16   although i think about the dark left I [TS]

00:35:19   never say it out loud and then I'm going [TS]

00:35:22   I'm going to a public library in [TS]

00:35:23   different town and doing a lot of [TS]

00:35:25   googling and you don't know what day [TS]

00:35:28   it's not me it's not my IP address John [TS]

00:35:32   on trying to say is this but yeah I [TS]

00:35:34   don't want to fucking busted guide but [TS]

00:35:35   if it breaks my heart that you're not in [TS]

00:35:37   the CIA not just because I know it meant [TS]

00:35:39   a lot to you i meant a lot to you could [TS]

00:35:41   have you could have been a seal if you [TS]

00:35:42   learn to swim [TS]

00:35:43   you could have been in black ops if [TS]

00:35:45   you're black you could rub it in the CIA [TS]

00:35:47   if you hadn't smoked all that weed and [TS]

00:35:49   had all those drugs and harm all of [TS]

00:35:50   those people and I think it's a goddamn [TS]

00:35:52   shame that you're not out there if [TS]

00:35:54   you're going to do one of these mashups [TS]

00:35:55   where you actually make somebody looking [TS]

00:35:56   face got eaten by somebody on the weed [TS]

00:35:58   and you could make that looks so much [TS]

00:35:59   better you might not even need a dark [TS]

00:36:01   and I don't know my question to you John [TS]

00:36:03   Rother what the fuck is paul allen out [TS]

00:36:05   there buying yachts and helicopters when [TS]

00:36:07   he could have a shadow shadow shadow CIA [TS]

00:36:08   that you essentially running but you [TS]

00:36:10   would admit hear your answer [TS]

00:36:12   I wish to God that he was listening [TS]

00:36:14   because i have it all i have it all [TS]

00:36:17   written out i have the whole thing what [TS]

00:36:18   I don't know is it written in urine or [TS]

00:36:21   lemon juice it's all written in my mind [TS]

00:36:23   writing but if fall allan Apollo wants a [TS]

00:36:28   private security service that is going [TS]

00:36:29   around you you know you think that's [TS]

00:36:31   like Pinkerton i'm talking about [TS]

00:36:33   something much your tires are you [TS]

00:36:34   talking so much deeper right now i'm [TS]

00:36:35   talking about something deeper to but i [TS]

00:36:36   have two encoded in certain language for [TS]

00:36:39   instance somebody chastise me the other [TS]

00:36:41   day for constantly referring on this [TS]

00:36:42   program two CIA agents who and they said [TS]

00:36:46   an agent is a subway the field that has [TS]

00:36:50   been that has been turned into an asset [TS]

00:36:53   by a field operative for hire case [TS]

00:36:58   officer and I had to say that's just the [TS]

00:37:01   kind of horse shit you'd expect to hear [TS]

00:37:02   from a fucking CIA agent i had to have [TS]

00:37:05   to say this person i know that [TS]

00:37:08   but i am doing I'm doing a podcast that [TS]

00:37:12   has lots of different listeners some of [TS]

00:37:15   them girls some of them people who have [TS]

00:37:17   not read every Spy book and so CIA agent [TS]

00:37:22   is the common parlance who for someone [TS]

00:37:25   in a trench coat and a and a fedora [TS]

00:37:28   lurking under of a phone pole but [TS]

00:37:31   lurking under a light pole on a dark [TS]

00:37:33   street on the radio and thick white [TS]

00:37:35   fedora and if I start talking about case [TS]

00:37:37   officers it's night sounds like [TS]

00:37:39   something somebody hitting a kid [TS]

00:37:40   yeah case officer is a guy sitting at a [TS]

00:37:42   desk with a with a comb-over and he's [TS]

00:37:45   monitoring his assets that's not what [TS]

00:37:46   we're trying to get it's not the yeah [TS]

00:37:48   everytime case officer sounds like [TS]

00:37:49   somebody you would have had to see a lot [TS]

00:37:51   throughout your use case officer is [TS]

00:37:53   somebody I had to submit signed pink [TS]

00:37:55   slips to every monday morning [TS]

00:37:57   really i don't want to revisit that [TS]

00:37:58   could involve who sent you there [TS]

00:38:00   oh my god careful you're so good how do [TS]

00:38:02   you remember cool i'll never forget [TS]

00:38:04   careful you never know mr. fenell yes of [TS]

00:38:07   course I do [TS]

00:38:07   ok mr. Cooper yes did we should just for [TS]

00:38:11   that I'm sorry to derail you we should [TS]

00:38:12   have just if we're not if when we do [TS]

00:38:14   Hitler and stuff we should have a panel [TS]

00:38:16   up with all these people want if i could [TS]

00:38:18   find mr. Finelli still hold on together [TS]

00:38:19   it's like I'm in a little pay for it but [TS]

00:38:23   uses is he realized his tennis racket [TS]

00:38:26   with the two two-and-a-half pound [TS]

00:38:28   barbell on either side but in any case [TS]

00:38:31   to listeners out there who are who are [TS]

00:38:33   checking off boxes at home [TS]

00:38:35   yes I know the difference between a case [TS]

00:38:36   officer an agent and also my secret [TS]

00:38:40   intelligence service that I'm running in [TS]

00:38:42   conjunction with Paul Allen's I [TS]

00:38:44   deliberately using the wrong words to [TS]

00:38:47   describe it so that it throws you off [TS]

00:38:49   the scent of our trail that's good in [TS]

00:38:52   there in the Straits of Malacca on the [TS]

00:38:53   octopus but turning wouldn't call that [TS]

00:38:57   we call that is it was that you calling [TS]

00:38:59   a red herring what would you call that [TS]

00:39:00   red herring yeah we're hearing a real [TS]

00:39:01   terms that in itself a canary trap [TS]

00:39:04   no I think red herring is a real [TS]

00:39:05   turbulent Rapids area represents a real [TS]

00:39:07   1400 you know the canary trap is no [TS]

00:39:10   super into canary traps [TS]

00:39:12   what's a community trap canary trap one [TS]

00:39:14   because you wanna find out who was [TS]

00:39:15   singing used to do variations in [TS]

00:39:19   Hollywood they really do this at apple [TS]

00:39:21   so let's say for example your [TS]

00:39:23   something's coming that somebody's feels [TS]

00:39:25   an iphone off a bar went how God this [TS]

00:39:28   and here's the kind of thing that like [TS]

00:39:29   at Apple like it's totally everybody [TS]

00:39:31   there sergeant schultz right now I don't [TS]

00:39:34   even want to know what I don't know I [TS]

00:39:36   don't know I just I I don't even know if [TS]

00:39:38   I'm in a building the media check i [TS]

00:39:40   don't know why I'm talking shots good [TS]

00:39:42   that's a great company you know they're [TS]

00:39:43   all rich all those people rich thousands [TS]

00:39:45   with ya and not sink its but it's true [TS]

00:39:49   here's the thing though when you get to [TS]

00:39:51   the point where you are getting I mean [TS]

00:39:54   I'm talking someone out of my ass cuz no [TS]

00:39:55   one actually knows what happens at apple [TS]

00:39:57   right all right because it's because I [TS]

00:39:59   like a second order to Maxwell Smart [TS]

00:40:00   doors [TS]

00:40:01   iíve spoken there and if they're good [TS]

00:40:04   but when i visited there it's been a [TS]

00:40:05   very very public area you don't go [TS]

00:40:07   anywhere near the black ops areas [TS]

00:40:09   there's buildings there [TS]

00:40:10   well as building five or something that [TS]

00:40:12   matter anyway here's the thing just [TS]

00:40:14   speaking the abstract interface program [TS]

00:40:16   there i'm sorry it's not too much going [TS]

00:40:20   on home perm marker their space program [TS]

00:40:22   to cut that out ok so I'm here's the [TS]

00:40:25   thing you got company right and there is [TS]

00:40:28   like a thing that you've actually got to [TS]

00:40:29   do maybe two associates probably a [TS]

00:40:31   product release and so what you do is [TS]

00:40:33   you circulate to everybody inside the [TS]

00:40:35   company you say okay everybody here's [TS]

00:40:37   the blue copy like everybody look at [TS]

00:40:39   this look it over [TS]

00:40:40   this is going to be like the press [TS]

00:40:42   release or what-have-you like everybody [TS]

00:40:43   check it out right but by no means [TS]

00:40:45   should obviously as with everything here [TS]

00:40:47   this must never be leaked so what [TS]

00:40:48   happens because we self-destruct right [TS]

00:40:50   and so it when it does get later that's [TS]

00:40:53   a red herring [TS]

00:40:54   no it's not a very trap is a canary trap [TS]

00:40:56   goes out every single one of those has a [TS]

00:41:00   word it's a little bit different on [TS]

00:41:02   every page [TS]

00:41:03   who yep it's you know like the watermark [TS]

00:41:06   the dvds now for that for the movies and [TS]

00:41:08   stuff and so you can find out pretty [TS]

00:41:10   easily through eight nearly [TS]

00:41:12   imperceptible difference here's the [TS]

00:41:14   thing this guy's we're not going to [TS]

00:41:15   compare notes don't have a way of my own [TS]

00:41:17   terrifying everybody terrified the [TS]

00:41:19   Gestapo storm exactly right so in that [TS]

00:41:22   instance right you are you you're [TS]

00:41:24   certainly not going to compare notes [TS]

00:41:25   with people why would you what what what [TS]

00:41:27   what you know [TS]

00:41:27   a sudden you're you're you're back in [TS]

00:41:29   Oceania you know what I'm saying her [TS]

00:41:30   canary trap is not a great idea [TS]

00:41:33   there's a great idea if you live in a [TS]

00:41:35   totally paranoid culture it's not [TS]

00:41:37   knowing how is it how is it to work for [TS]

00:41:39   you in your shadow shadow shall work for [TS]

00:41:41   two hours at work for me i'm a great [TS]

00:41:43   shadow boss [TS]

00:41:44   really you think you're pretty good like [TS]

00:41:47   a maternity leave and that kind of thing [TS]

00:41:48   all that stuff it's me paul allen is is [TS]

00:41:52   great on that and this is a subset of [TS]

00:41:54   his company since we have the same [TS]

00:41:56   length HR policies [TS]

00:41:58   let's get overall paul allen [TS]

00:41:59   organization has ok alright so it's like [TS]

00:42:02   a title a title stake here and stuff [TS]

00:42:04   wow that's awesome that's awesome now [TS]

00:42:05   and now I'll cut this part out for [TS]

00:42:07   broadcast but he's goofy right all our [TS]

00:42:10   yeah when you do that stuff like [TS]

00:42:12   orthogonal related to what he does and [TS]

00:42:14   he's still involved with that goofy [TS]

00:42:16   museum he made the museum because he's [TS]

00:42:18   not super involved in day-to-day [TS]

00:42:19   activities that it's not a question of [TS]

00:42:21   him not being involved with the question [TS]

00:42:22   of he made this museum and then he was [TS]

00:42:24   kind of like kexp he gave them a bunch [TS]

00:42:26   of money and equipped with funding and [TS]

00:42:27   there are many said alright sink or swim [TS]

00:42:30   uh-huh and can be I've told you the [TS]

00:42:33   story about EMP at one point in the in [TS]

00:42:35   the 90s early 2000s they have like 800 [TS]

00:42:37   employees here there were people [TS]

00:42:39   dedicated just to just identify any [TS]

00:42:42   veterans bondage just to cataloging any [TS]

00:42:45   veterans bongos that they've already [TS]

00:42:46   bought and then at a certain point I was [TS]

00:42:49   like oh sink or swim you guys can't [TS]

00:42:51   survive this way and then they fired 690 [TS]

00:42:56   of the 800 employees must got you don't [TS]

00:42:58   think he described want to connect be [TS]

00:42:59   misremembering this but I think he [TS]

00:43:00   described it as being a little bit like [TS]

00:43:02   rosebud like Charles Foster Kane they [TS]

00:43:04   had creates the stuff they hadn't even [TS]

00:43:05   opened [TS]

00:43:06   well that's still true there are their [TS]

00:43:07   warehouses in seattle where there there [TS]

00:43:09   are incredible [TS]

00:43:10   well let me play strike that lets if you [TS]

00:43:14   believe that grunge was important and [TS]

00:43:17   that that that that style of music was [TS]

00:43:20   good now you let the grunge even [TS]

00:43:22   actually was a genre if you believe that [TS]

00:43:24   in 25 years later there is my man [TS]

00:43:27   that anything in common other than fuzz [TS]

00:43:29   pedal if you believe anything about the [TS]

00:43:32   Seattle music scene in the nineties the [TS]

00:43:34   other than that Nirvana was came out of [TS]

00:43:37   it a couple of the rec center there are [TS]

00:43:41   warehouses full of people's old tennis [TS]

00:43:43   shoes and like drum diapers or whatever [TS]

00:43:47   drivers where shelves in China called [TS]

00:43:52   pull-ups Jason Finn sweat vials all this [TS]

00:43:56   stuff it's just that they bought for the [TS]

00:43:58   baby [TS]

00:43:59   about four dollars on the penny just [TS]

00:44:02   filling acres and acres and acres of [TS]

00:44:04   wearing a sly smile with dental he said [TS]

00:44:06   he had some with them it's like God [TS]

00:44:07   2,000 bucks they're like sold [TS]

00:44:11   I mean seriously they bought they tried [TS]

00:44:12   to buy everything so they don't they [TS]

00:44:14   don't even know what they've got they [TS]

00:44:15   can have you got a big they got a big [TS]

00:44:16   van cise crate they're going we don't [TS]

00:44:18   this could be tad this could be my [TS]

00:44:20   honey's van this they don't know they [TS]

00:44:22   don't know they don't care because they [TS]

00:44:24   started buying that stuff in the late [TS]

00:44:26   nineties when people were still [TS]

00:44:28   convinced that seattle in the early [TS]

00:44:30   nineties was like San Francisco in the [TS]

00:44:33   sixties ever overrated and one day it's [TS]

00:44:37   going to be historical and everyone is [TS]

00:44:39   going to care about you know about the [TS]

00:44:42   green apple quickstep and what doesn't [TS]

00:44:46   what the fuck did you have a stroke what [TS]

00:44:48   is that green arrow pick snapple [TS]

00:44:50   quickstep was abandoned six-man know it [TS]

00:44:53   was such an excuse for a name like that [TS]

00:44:55   those kids used to walk around Seattle [TS]

00:44:57   where I swear to you [TS]

00:44:59   feather boas in the middle of the day [TS]

00:45:02   walking around with those big white coat [TS]

00:45:04   and sunglasses and festivals and we [TS]

00:45:06   figure they'll polish and they were like [TS]

00:45:08   where we're going to be the next Rolling [TS]

00:45:10   Stones it was like you're not even going [TS]

00:45:13   to be the next still pull bathtub get [TS]

00:45:16   out of here and now the water you're not [TS]

00:45:19   going to be the last murder city devils [TS]

00:45:21   about the one kid I see him all the time [TS]

00:45:23   he's still out here how these guys look [TS]

00:45:26   very very silly [TS]

00:45:28   yeah well that was the time so it's even [TS]

00:45:30   got a lot of your hands and bongos [TS]

00:45:32   yeah if you believe in Seattle the thing [TS]

00:45:34   is in if you could go back to 1967 and [TS]

00:45:37   buy all of grace licks [TS]

00:45:39   drum underwear or whatever it is that [TS]

00:45:42   people you know if you go back to the [TS]

00:45:44   sixties and by jimi hendrix's being [TS]

00:45:46   broken bell-bottoms don't buy those [TS]

00:45:50   because now maybe you can see that [TS]

00:45:53   you're a great boss and now you could [TS]

00:45:55   take those two one of those dan Aykroyd [TS]

00:45:58   rock-and-roll a hamburger places and put [TS]

00:46:03   them up on the fall in a glass case and [TS]

00:46:05   sell them for a million billion dollars [TS]

00:46:07   you know you may be the first person i [TS]

00:46:09   can't keep up with my god [TS]

00:46:12   so when the data criticize this you know [TS]

00:46:14   what god damned cold sores fuck tonight [TS]

00:46:17   but you're a great boss but you're just [TS]

00:46:18   totally self funded at this point can [TS]

00:46:20   you can't really say I'm not at liberty [TS]

00:46:22   to say your location makes very general [TS]

00:46:25   questions okay alright so for example I [TS]

00:46:28   don't have an office but obviously you [TS]

00:46:29   have some kind of a work environment i [TS]

00:46:31   guess that might be some kind of a [TS]

00:46:32   Helicarrier i'm staying in my work [TS]

00:46:35   environment now and I'm wrapped in a [TS]

00:46:36   sheet like like like like my forefathers [TS]

00:46:40   expensive your modesty like my farmer [TS]

00:46:42   for the weekend nicely around closing [TS]

00:46:45   sheet they didn't have sheets they had [TS]

00:46:47   that they had woven corn blankets so no [TS]

00:46:50   I am wrapped in a sheet because i'm [TS]

00:46:52   always trying to find the right amount [TS]

00:46:54   of comfortably unclothed but I couldn't [TS]

00:46:58   do the podcast to do my work be [TS]

00:47:01   unclothed but also be comfortable with [TS]

00:47:03   nudity seem disrespectful or you leave a [TS]

00:47:05   stain it does seem disrespectful I don't [TS]

00:47:07   want to be doing the podcast room where [TS]

00:47:08   I'm just sitting here in the altogether [TS]

00:47:10   yeah i'm i'm i'm fully clothed but my [TS]

00:47:13   pants are filthy [TS]

00:47:14   well i'm sitting in a leather chair so [TS]

00:47:16   if you sit for an hour and a half and a [TS]

00:47:18   leather chair with no pants on the [TS]

00:47:19   proposed it's you yeah to you know six [TS]

00:47:24   months later you're gonna have piglets e [TS]

00:47:29   ok so i guess i'm guessing the work [TS]

00:47:32   environment you have you know you i'm [TS]

00:47:34   guessing it's like hot and cold water [TS]

00:47:35   you know when turning on and off you've [TS]

00:47:36   been very selective in your hiring [TS]

00:47:38   imagine there's a certain sense of humor [TS]

00:47:40   but you also know when to be serious [TS]

00:47:41   right [TS]

00:47:42   ok so well you know what I don't think [TS]

00:47:43   they can tell by my look they tell by [TS]

00:47:45   the glance of you ever say anything you [TS]

00:47:47   don't say anything to get what youre [TS]

00:47:48   don't be upset [TS]

00:47:50   that's right i look over and then they [TS]

00:47:51   go back to work [TS]

00:47:52   you know what they've done fucking [TS]

00:47:54   farmers you know and all this bullshit [TS]

00:47:57   about about family farms [TS]

00:47:59   well yeah but i mean the the family is [TS]

00:48:01   really really really rich and they've [TS]

00:48:02   probably never even seen the farm [TS]

00:48:04   yeah and the subsidies you get subsidies [TS]

00:48:06   tonight not greedy kill chickens for a [TS]

00:48:08   year and get 50 million dollars while [TS]

00:48:09   you're telling me family farms call me [TS]

00:48:11   young give me a fucking break give [TS]

00:48:14   Merlin are fucking break [TS]

00:48:15   when's the last time you had a good [TS]

00:48:16   peach be honest you know what I'm not a [TS]

00:48:19   super big peach eater tomato lettuce [TS]

00:48:22   tomato and I don't like tomatoes was [TS]

00:48:26   last minute steak see it probably comes [TS]

00:48:30   from a farm you know where you know what [TS]

00:48:32   you know where was we were in [TS]

00:48:33   Minneapolis was registration this is [TS]

00:48:36   your third minneapolis story i was in [TS]

00:48:38   Minneapolis and we went to one of those [TS]

00:48:40   brazilian steak restaurants like John [TS]

00:48:43   and I went to Jason had sorts takes they [TS]

00:48:45   come out with the stakes on the swords [TS]

00:48:47   and they just feed you stake until you [TS]

00:48:48   are quick to you are insane with steak [TS]

00:48:51   until you have an added insane amount of [TS]

00:48:54   steak and it was very good i don't speak [TS]

00:48:56   for Jason but i think i think i may have [TS]

00:48:58   changed his game that night I think my [TS]

00:49:01   engines your big change [TS]

00:49:03   okay and he had some good notes on you [TS]

00:49:06   boy all its entirety [TS]

00:49:08   oh yeah yeah he doesn't know anything [TS]

00:49:10   about me when he knows enough about you [TS]

00:49:12   to give me give me some good nobody's [TS]

00:49:14   making it up he just thinks he knows [TS]

00:49:15   about because he sees me around all [TS]

00:49:17   right up all right i'll save it for the [TS]

00:49:19   after dark [TS]

00:49:20   he sees me around and he's like oh yeah [TS]

00:49:21   I know Gotye and then don't let or don't [TS]

00:49:24   pull out the easy one if you know what I [TS]

00:49:25   mean what i'm saying what i'm saying is [TS]

00:49:27   get insight that he secretly works for [TS]

00:49:31   you [TS]

00:49:32   hi plausible deniability you just got me [TS]

00:49:35   a canary trapped in you you know what [TS]

00:49:38   say nothing [TS]

00:49:38   shut up no not that not that shut up i [TS]

00:49:42   mean the catchphrase shut up you know [TS]

00:49:44   where cold sores come from [TS]

00:49:45   here's the thing i used to baby them [TS]

00:49:48   okay so here's the history of cold sores [TS]

00:49:49   yeah now we're out what time the first [TS]

00:49:51   time I came with your toilet seat sooo [TS]

00:49:54   Donna are you are you on [TS]

00:49:58   is it a positive excipient wsr BMW of [TS]

00:50:01   North yeah sounds like a root beer [TS]

00:50:03   pnw is they stress ball [TS]

00:50:05   that's a spelling is at bellingham ease [TS]

00:50:07   the stress box stress pumps is a joke [TS]

00:50:10   because I the these so many people have [TS]

00:50:13   herpes the guitar player of harvey [TS]

00:50:15   danger i used to get cold sores Jeff [TS]

00:50:18   what what we would Jeff what we would [TS]

00:50:20   call cold stones but Jeff again because [TS]

00:50:22   of the shame of the socially [TS]

00:50:24   communicated aspect of cold sores to [TS]

00:50:28   Jeff did not want to be getting cold [TS]

00:50:30   sores like so many people he did not [TS]

00:50:32   want to have cultures now he had them [TS]

00:50:34   but he did not want to have them yeah [TS]

00:50:36   and so he would he would call them [TS]

00:50:38   stress bumps [TS]

00:50:39   he said I man because the stress so [TS]

00:50:41   sweet and we would say you mean cold [TS]

00:50:43   sore and he said no no it's not a cold [TS]

00:50:44   sore [TS]

00:50:45   it's a stretch but get them when I'm [TS]

00:50:47   stressed would say yes that's not that's [TS]

00:50:49   not an accurate that is when i get into [TS]

00:50:51   is what I'm not sleeping enough [TS]

00:50:52   definitely not sleeping enough because [TS]

00:50:54   your immune system goes down [TS]

00:50:56   yeah and then be the that the negative [TS]

00:51:01   energy that you got from kissing toilet [TS]

00:51:02   seats or bad girls shit comes out in the [TS]

00:51:06   form of the giant posture ler throbbin [TS]

00:51:10   beacon to other people that you are [TS]

00:51:13   unclean unsafe [TS]

00:51:15   it's a warning sign it's a warning sign [TS]

00:51:16   that says do not kiss this person do not [TS]

00:51:18   fall in love with this person they are [TS]

00:51:20   hideous [TS]

00:51:21   they have been places you don't want to [TS]

00:51:23   know about I think I just figured it out [TS]

00:51:25   I just free i think what you're saying [TS]

00:51:26   to me is I got what I got but then I got [TS]

00:51:28   up spot but you're saying I should not [TS]

00:51:31   be upset right you got upside because [TS]

00:51:33   you got what you got [TS]

00:51:34   you know what there's a lesson even in [TS]

00:51:38   the things you're so very wrong about [TS]

00:51:39   there's always a lesson to be cleaned [TS]

00:51:41   well you know cleaning is cleaning is [TS]

00:51:42   when you go through after you got all [TS]

00:51:43   the big corn you go back and get small [TS]

00:51:45   corn you know clearly you know what [TS]

00:51:47   clicking is I can get caught sneaking I [TS]

00:51:50   cannot click but my daughter can Gleek [TS]

00:51:52   up on accidentally or on purpose too [TS]

00:51:56   young to click on purpose [TS]

00:51:58   I don't dig so there she's too young to [TS]

00:52:02   click on purpose okay thank you [TS]

00:52:04   I and here's the thing it started out to [TS]

00:52:07   him to it started out when i was a child [TS]

00:52:10   yes I'd like its any toilet seats or a [TS]

00:52:12   girl named donna but [TS]

00:52:14   are you are you are you like in my day [TS]

00:52:18   in court at any point [TS]

00:52:20   are you saying that girl's name Donna [TS]

00:52:22   are fast [TS]

00:52:23   well it doesn't mean if they're not [TS]

00:52:25   they're missing the best bed because I [TS]

00:52:27   don't you clean your destiny [TS]

00:52:29   I don't listen are fast i was no [TS]

00:52:31   question is this a common thing to do [TS]

00:52:33   people think girls that I have a [TS]

00:52:35   relative named Donna attacking the name [TS]

00:52:37   Donna Donna right it's actually faster [TS]

00:52:40   girl's name [TS]

00:52:41   okay let me ask you this and I mean this [TS]

00:52:42   is that I don't mean to make this a bit [TS]

00:52:44   but like if you name a kid fucking [TS]

00:52:45   Jeeves like what would not believe how [TS]

00:52:47   fucking you should call you can't cheat [TS]

00:52:49   so cheesy like well what are they going [TS]

00:52:50   to be they're gonna be in the service [TS]

00:52:51   industry it's just CEO name Jeeves know [TS]

00:52:55   right right okay I'm with Babs come your [TS]

00:52:59   basket and that means it's gonna be a [TS]

00:53:00   gay know Babs coming was Richie Rich's a [TS]

00:53:03   bass come at baskin sir are in or [TS]

00:53:09   episode that I now this is what you [TS]

00:53:15   should have to say anything now you just [TS]

00:53:17   make the sound it's hilarious and me on [TS]

00:53:21   this is why you should never date a [TS]

00:53:22   woman with a waitress named Anastasia [TS]

00:53:25   also what interests me yeah that fucking [TS]

00:53:27   fast waitress she's a very fast weight [TS]

00:53:29   room you might as well instead of skip [TS]

00:53:31   school just drop into Danny's she's a [TS]

00:53:34   she's a waitress but she has a tear in [TS]

00:53:36   her pantyhose [TS]

00:53:37   yes the inside of her funds not afraid [TS]

00:53:40   to bring you a grand slam [TS]

00:53:41   oh darling don't know what are we gonna [TS]

00:53:44   do thing up for Donna what we're going [TS]

00:53:48   to do when it turns out somebody's [TS]

00:53:50   listening to this podcast her name is [TS]

00:53:51   Donna and she's like a really nice chase [TS]

00:53:53   girl I guess have intercourse with her [TS]

00:53:56   turn her out without just and give us a [TS]

00:53:59   particular take your main stick and give [TS]

00:54:01   her a giver stress for Donna how did you [TS]

00:54:04   get out you stay stress but now we have [TS]

00:54:06   a shrill voice or which should be [TS]

00:54:07   smoking so much if you know what I mean [TS]

00:54:09   a hoarse voice Tracy's get course it's [TS]

00:54:12   got a Russian got our lady hoarse voice [TS]

00:54:14   it does whole brother right [TS]

00:54:17   gonna need Paul Island to get us out of [TS]

00:54:18   this one it all started when I was a [TS]

00:54:20   child and other fast girl names [TS]

00:54:23   oh the festival aims let me think about [TS]

00:54:25   it here summary you know I don't want [TS]

00:54:29   some of the obvious ones like you can do [TS]

00:54:30   whatever you want to fast like Donna or [TS]

00:54:32   in a clinic or seat intercourse e720 [TS]

00:54:37   made 40 don't give your daughter Corsi [TS]

00:54:40   yeah but like you know this is joe key [TS]

00:54:42   names like Hortense like there are [TS]

00:54:44   actually women named hortons scullery [TS]

00:54:48   maids oh god why do you say that [TS]

00:54:51   oh and if you wanna hear my clothes or [TS]

00:54:54   do you want to do that's what do I talk [TS]

00:54:56   about I don't happy heart about fast [TS]

00:54:57   girls down or we could develop a whole [TS]

00:54:59   taxonomy these things that can help a [TS]

00:55:01   lot of young people men and women [TS]

00:55:02   listening to you talk about your cold [TS]

00:55:04   sores and talking about fast girls I [TS]

00:55:06   have a sense that those two roads are [TS]

00:55:08   going to converge to roads converge to a [TS]

00:55:10   yellow wood yeah and that means almost [TS]

00:55:12   smell the fresh bumps then i traveled [TS]

00:55:15   but can I saw fucking bird in a tree [TS]

00:55:18   I next with the toilet seat journey was [TS]

00:55:21   playing of course was of course that you [TS]

00:55:23   shared use you hotbox the cigarette with [TS]

00:55:26   some girl behind the bible reading plan [TS]

00:55:27   you can get a stress month from [TS]

00:55:29   hotboxing I don't know see this is the [TS]

00:55:33   thing you you are at the heart of it a [TS]

00:55:35   scientist a rationalist your man of [TS]

00:55:36   reason you're Hobbesian whatever the [TS]

00:55:38   fuck that means i think that means you [TS]

00:55:39   like eating people and I mean then you [TS]

00:55:42   have yeah it started when I was a child [TS]

00:55:47   I always get what was then referred to [TS]

00:55:49   as fever blisters that will also start [TS]

00:55:52   off with a lot of God waitress names you [TS]

00:55:58   gotta look out for [TS]

00:55:59   so there was an Osama uncle licked you [TS]

00:56:02   when you were a little kid you're okay [TS]

00:56:05   oh my god it's not going back to me was [TS]

00:56:07   Uncle it will go ahead of course the [TS]

00:56:09   evad3rs local intercourse see have you [TS]

00:56:14   had your stress buster whole life and [TS]

00:56:16   you're justyou blotted out you think [TS]

00:56:18   it's some neck every time it went away [TS]

00:56:19   he come back and the canary trap and [TS]

00:56:21   give me a 91 your folks were in the [TS]

00:56:23   other room drinking gin martinis and [TS]

00:56:25   uncle lucky isn't it [TS]

00:56:27   bassinet I say why he was a shout out in [TS]

00:56:31   the cold sores you get what you get and [TS]

00:56:34   tell you about that [TS]

00:56:35   click click click volts or cold sore [TS]

00:56:38   it started when I was a child and I [TS]

00:56:41   would give always been referred to as [TS]

00:56:42   fever blisters and and this is like when [TS]

00:56:44   you get a cold you could just your wart [TS]

00:56:46   refinance little all [TS]

00:56:55   oh god it's a it's an anger this becomes [TS]

00:56:59   physical it'sit's shot through my sick [TS]

00:57:02   immune system i think i'm getting [TS]

00:57:03   literally getting a cold sore on my [TS]

00:57:04   witch hazel right now I'm going to pop [TS]

00:57:07   this shit okay let's go straight but you [TS]

00:57:09   know what let's go straight to the [TS]

00:57:10   functional component of this have you [TS]

00:57:11   ever gotten a culture of your nose [TS]

00:57:13   no you can't get a cold sore in your [TS]

00:57:16   notice you can just forget using doing [TS]

00:57:20   John [TS]

00:57:21   it's a mucous membrane if uncle if he [TS]

00:57:23   put his time of your old songs in here [TS]

00:57:26   knows it doesn't have to be a pretty [TS]

00:57:27   small tongue oh man you can get a cold [TS]

00:57:32   sore nose and I've heard people having [TS]

00:57:34   no sex [TS]

00:57:35   what you have sex with almost anything [TS]

00:57:37   if you learn enough to meet you [TS]

00:57:39   they're putting their noses in one [TS]

00:57:40   another or they're putting stuff in [TS]

00:57:41   there putting you don't eat somebody's [TS]

00:57:43   nose [TS]

00:57:44   you always give me a fresh way of [TS]

00:57:45   thinking about everything ok yeah called [TS]

00:57:48   docking so here's the thing [TS]

00:57:51   let's skip my childhood and go straight [TS]

00:57:53   to the functional component of this [TS]

00:57:54   which is that there are people who get [TS]

00:57:55   stressed pumps and here's what they do [TS]

00:57:57   dates a fucking rookie mistake they baby [TS]

00:57:59   it and go you see 00 example celeron all [TS]

00:58:04   it says on the internet I have to put a [TS]

00:58:05   nice coupon it [TS]

00:58:06   what the fuck you don't you get a wet [TS]

00:58:08   chin a big cold sore stomp and put the [TS]

00:58:10   ice cube down you're spreading disease [TS]

00:58:12   to your chin put it thanks [TS]

00:58:14   so okay what to do next right step 20 [TS]

00:58:16   this work it's all clinical look at me [TS]

00:58:18   I'm a doctor you going to buy some [TS]

00:58:20   fucking blistex and you want to do with [TS]

00:58:22   your filthy little finger you squeeze [TS]

00:58:24   some useless ballistics on your finger [TS]

00:58:25   and now you've got you've got a shiny [TS]

00:58:28   pointless lip and herpes finger now [TS]

00:58:32   you've got a way you might you might as [TS]

00:58:33   well just go just go rub your stress [TS]

00:58:35   bump all over everything in the house [TS]

00:58:37   that's right including your remote [TS]

00:58:38   people are going to touch that's right [TS]

00:58:41   you might as well just go into the to [TS]

00:58:43   the the kids room and let them know it [TS]

00:58:47   you're gonna get it eventually had money [TS]

00:58:49   i wanna get around i was but let me make [TS]

00:58:51   sure I've got this right you gotta watch [TS]

00:58:53   out for Donna right you gotta watch out [TS]

00:58:55   for you like watch out for in one of two [TS]

00:58:58   ways either like looking out or Hey look [TS]

00:59:00   at most you think she might have blistex [TS]

00:59:02   finger and said once i'm thinking in [TS]

00:59:04   your bathroom and there's no not today [TS]

00:59:07   not going but no reason is not that's a [TS]

00:59:11   start dating Donna there's nothing worse [TS]

00:59:13   it's gonna happen [TS]

00:59:14   oh my god done uh-huh good-looking Donna [TS]

00:59:17   that be held a hobo fight now you go to [TS]

00:59:20   the next level up and you're going pro [TS]

00:59:21   so you bought about some finger cots you [TS]

00:59:23   got to make a sickly fear and you're [TS]

00:59:25   ready to go to town right this is going [TS]

00:59:26   to be your weekend in Vegas you're going [TS]

00:59:27   to take care of this shit you're doing [TS]

00:59:28   everything right [TS]

00:59:29   yes your highschool reunions your [TS]

00:59:31   20-year reunion you don't want to stress [TS]

00:59:32   you got limited amount of time right now [TS]

00:59:35   that will work and it can work but [TS]

00:59:37   should we really go to the pro level do [TS]

00:59:40   you think I think people need to know [TS]

00:59:41   that she go to the pro level you're the [TS]

00:59:43   pro level i learned this i think from [TS]

00:59:44   you this is an educational port of [TS]

00:59:46   philosophy podcast that's correct you [TS]

00:59:48   know you know you taught me the basics [TS]

00:59:49   of this in a way that made me shudder [TS]

00:59:51   and like so many of the things you've [TS]

00:59:53   tried to help me with I immediately set [TS]

00:59:54   it aside as being impractical [TS]

00:59:55   impractical and and completely insane [TS]

00:59:57   likes attended some research on [TS]

00:59:57   likes attended some research on [TS]

01:00:00   but on the editor on realize that yes I [TS]

01:00:01   realized I was wrong [TS]

01:00:03   uncle Luckey made me hurt [TS]

01:00:06   hey you know we shouldn't talk about [TS]

01:00:09   this is you know nobody really just did [TS]

01:00:11   you get your disgusting you were about [TS]

01:00:13   to go to the pro level [TS]

01:00:14   all right well here's the problem this [TS]

01:00:15   is where this is where you get into the [TS]

01:00:17   fucking jungle lair bullshit because I'm [TS]

01:00:19   gonna tell you everything you know is [TS]

01:00:20   wrong [TS]

01:00:20   you ready for that here's your economics [TS]

01:00:22   you keep touching it stop touching it [TS]

01:00:24   don't play with it don't put things on [TS]

01:00:26   it here's what you put on you ready for [TS]

01:00:27   this [TS]

01:00:28   you goin to wash your hands like a [TS]

01:00:29   fucking gentleman you get the sharpest [TS]

01:00:30   needle you've got to get some cotton [TS]

01:00:32   balls and you get some alcohol wash the [TS]

01:00:36   hands good put the alcohol is something [TS]

01:00:38   you're probably going to throw away with [TS]

01:00:39   the needle into the alcohol you can [TS]

01:00:41   bring the end if you want to get in the [TS]

01:00:43   alcohol [TS]

01:00:43   get it all clean and here's what you're [TS]

01:00:45   going to do as soon as you start to get [TS]

01:00:47   the bump you take the needle with the [TS]

01:00:50   alcohol on it yet take the cotton ball [TS]

01:00:52   with the alcohol on it and you poke that [TS]

01:00:54   shit name and then you put the optional [TS]

01:00:57   order to stop the alcohol straight on it [TS]

01:00:59   do not touch anything else it all goes [TS]

01:01:01   into a hazmat bag and throw it away then [TS]

01:01:03   you're just going to put in so much [TS]

01:01:05   alcohol on that area alcohol alcohol [TS]

01:01:08   alcohol is going to drive you out your [TS]

01:01:10   lips will turn white with rage but you [TS]

01:01:12   know what's gonna happen it's gonna go [TS]

01:01:14   away it's not gonna spread like a spread [TS]

01:01:16   you're not gonna order though the 123 [TS]

01:01:18   stress but problem that a lot of people [TS]

01:01:19   get right yeah you never had not you [TS]

01:01:21   ever had the one that turns into three [TS]

01:01:22   sure i'm gonna go up your nose I don't [TS]

01:01:25   think I think that's a canary trap John [TS]

01:01:26   I don't think you can really get in your [TS]

01:01:28   notes know you get them in your nose [TS]

01:01:29   sometimes I so if there's more on the [TS]

01:01:31   internet which I don't think you should [TS]

01:01:32   do right now but after this is over I'm [TS]

01:01:34   gonna want everything I've got [TS]

01:01:35   everything i'm gonna lie I was like the [TS]

01:01:37   likies know everything that type in cold [TS]

01:01:41   sore nose and I bet you find some [TS]

01:01:43   terrible photographs you don't see how [TS]

01:01:45   oh you know if you poke the Colts are [TS]

01:01:48   you turn it from a cold sore into an [TS]

01:01:51   alley we it but it's a treatable owie [TS]

01:01:54   it's treatable out that it's just an [TS]

01:01:55   alley on your lip like any Ally anytime [TS]

01:01:57   you would get a now if you burn yourself [TS]

01:01:59   you sitting there and you're sitting [TS]

01:02:01   there and you're watching your lip get [TS]

01:02:02   big and it's like having something [TS]

01:02:04   that's good you know you're on the floor [TS]

01:02:05   to know where you're going no no this [TS]

01:02:07   thing is the worst feeling in the world [TS]

01:02:09   there's a feeling that everybody gets [TS]

01:02:10   cold sore stress pumps get [TS]

01:02:12   just feeling the force of physical [TS]

01:02:13   feeling there's something in your heart [TS]

01:02:15   that goes oh I shouldn't have thought [TS]

01:02:17   that thought I was a bad person once and [TS]

01:02:20   now i'm going to place my just desserts [TS]

01:02:22   nothing to do with talking for like [TS]

01:02:24   eating my you different ways what about [TS]

01:02:27   a form can get from a fork you could get [TS]

01:02:30   it from before but you're eating off of [TS]

01:02:32   a fork that was eaten from eating off of [TS]

01:02:34   from a bad person [TS]

01:02:37   it's such a shame you're not a Puritan [TS]

01:02:42   you can help so many people you can make [TS]

01:02:44   so many people feel so bad about so many [TS]

01:02:47   ways [TS]

01:02:47   ah anyway the alcoholics 14 was [TS]

01:02:51   insufficiently clean [TS]

01:02:52   yes since it was last in the hands of a [TS]

01:02:54   bad girl nobody said hopefully suicide [TS]

01:02:57   chick get say God Donna I read the sky [TS]

01:03:03   ride with her that Disney man the [TS]

01:03:06   skyrise she was wearing those jeans that [TS]

01:03:08   were like a kind of high-waisted and I [TS]

01:03:10   gettin hella whatever her she looked [TS]

01:03:12   like she had legs made of denim they [TS]

01:03:14   were those jeans with no back pocket [TS]

01:03:17   no no and she man she was not afraid to [TS]

01:03:21   wear white jeans that proudly oh she [TS]

01:03:25   might have been many many pauses for she [TS]

01:03:27   had she has you go faster here where you [TS]

01:03:29   can have memorized her bangs were [TS]

01:03:31   feathered in like John started talking [TS]

01:03:34   freaking me out every bit of this year [TS]

01:03:36   the biggest the second biggest hurdles [TS]

01:03:38   of any girl I've ever met she had the [TS]

01:03:40   giant the giant things on the side she [TS]

01:03:42   had braces big wings bridge she actually [TS]

01:03:44   switch apart acted like she liked me for [TS]

01:03:47   almost three weeks ago painful days it's [TS]

01:03:49   like waiting for cold sores bloom kodama [TS]

01:03:52   Donna ah God still still haunts me [TS]

01:03:55   yeah yeah she's at musc that jovan musk [TS]

01:03:58   ojo von maur emails that I was good no [TS]

01:04:02   not too much i'm not talking about Julie [TS]

01:04:03   levels talking very general general [TS]

01:04:05   terms terms and harder to put a little [TS]

01:04:07   bit on either side of her never ever [TS]

01:04:09   hear i wish i could have been there that [TS]

01:04:11   little without the area are Jesus Christ [TS]

01:04:14   and a little bit of feeling that way by [TS]

01:04:15   journey god damn fucking kyllikki [TS]

01:04:19   equipment everything did he ruined [TS]

01:04:21   everything [TS]

01:04:22   you know there are there are absolutely [TS]

01:04:23   arm and listening to this podcast yeah a [TS]

01:04:25   we're not alive in the seventies and we [TS]

01:04:27   have never had a cold sore and they're [TS]

01:04:29   thinking to themselves why am i [TS]

01:04:30   listening to this this is not helping me [TS]

01:04:33   nah they don't realize that I've never [TS]

01:04:35   been to the globe theatre was he shut up [TS]

01:04:39   they don't realize that now that they [TS]

01:04:40   are listening to this podcast they have [TS]

01:04:41   entered into the guild with people you [TS]

01:04:43   know fast girls [TS]

01:04:45   yeah and who bad things sometimes bad [TS]

01:04:46   things happen to them yeah and you're [TS]

01:04:48   going to get a cold sore one of these [TS]

01:04:49   days off work for you know how many [TS]

01:04:51   people are going to get cold searches [TS]

01:04:52   because of the show because we need to [TS]

01:04:54   think about it isn't that awful [TS]

01:04:55   she's a trigger warning trigger warning [TS]

01:04:57   we should put a thing at the beginning [TS]

01:04:58   trigger and when we do trigger word get [TS]

01:05:01   to do in pig latin or how does that work [TS]

01:05:02   you say old old k or say okay or say a [TS]

01:05:08   la undertray morning way [TS]

01:05:11   yeah let's take me i'm not sure how I'm [TS]

01:05:14   not sure how that works you know what [TS]

01:05:15   out i'll look after look up but no snow [TS]

01:05:17   storms I'm gonna look up the trigger [TS]

01:05:19   source anyway you know what skiing all [TS]

01:05:22   that John self-awareness and alcohol [TS]

01:05:24   I mean not the kind that you're you know [TS]

01:05:25   so no and-and-and-and-and 19 years later [TS]

01:05:29   no do not do [TS]

01:05:30   yes do not do not waste your money on [TS]

01:05:33   that seventy percent shit go straight to [TS]

01:05:35   the 91 % yeah that's tough talk [TS]

01:05:38   no it's pure stuff you gotta clean a [TS]

01:05:39   mouse or get rid of course or you want [TS]

01:05:41   the stronger stuff you can get and happy [TS]

01:05:42   honest with you it's gonna hurt [TS]

01:05:44   it's not gonna be a soothing and [TS]

01:05:46   deliciously kisses of an ice cube know [TS]

01:05:48   this is gonna fucking hurt so much to [TS]

01:05:50   put a needle into a blood blister [TS]

01:05:53   yeah but here's the thing don't wait [TS]

01:05:54   let's blow it start early and that's [TS]

01:05:56   right and then alcohol you know more [TS]

01:05:58   alcohol keep going and learn to go into [TS]

01:06:00   the pain now I'm speaking to you [TS]

01:06:02   directly all the strange one you okay [TS]

01:06:04   exactly exactly and and don't don't [TS]

01:06:07   treat it like a fucking fondue one [TS]

01:06:08   straight d people write in and then you [TS]

01:06:11   know you this there is going to be let's [TS]

01:06:13   be honest there's going to be a little [TS]

01:06:14   bit of the liquid that comes out okay [TS]

01:06:17   bloody is a no-no that's the deadliest [TS]

01:06:19   substance in the world [TS]

01:06:20   it must go on the cotton ball with the [TS]

01:06:22   alcohol and that goes into the hazmat [TS]

01:06:23   bag that's right now go wash my hands [TS]

01:06:26   again [TS]

01:06:26   watch your hands again it's like they're [TS]

01:06:28   the liquid that comes out of that cold [TS]

01:06:30   sore is like a sourdough starter [TS]

01:06:33   it's like you kinda Poland's molecules [TS]

01:06:35   in it there's a little bit of Napoleon [TS]

01:06:37   yes there's a little bit of the of the [TS]

01:06:39   cold sore that Napoleon got from [TS]

01:06:41   Josephine in the liquid that comes [TS]

01:06:43   coming out of your lip [TS]

01:06:44   Josephine is totally started rapping [TS]

01:06:46   Josephine is totally a fucking waitress [TS]

01:06:48   named I got Joe Oh Joe can I get a warm [TS]

01:06:51   up here cher they think Don in preparing [TS]

01:06:56   the regular doctor cameos are you going [TS]

01:06:59   out with Joe oh I am her name is [TS]

01:07:02   Josephine Baker will be careful for [TS]

01:07:05   that's the best boom she wants to be [TS]

01:07:07   called just two people choose on days [TS]

01:07:10   that I think he's given her more than a [TS]

01:07:15   few tablespoons of hollandaise my train [TS]

01:07:20   if you know what I'm saying [TS]

01:07:26   [Music] [TS]