0:00:01[Music]
0:00:05hello hi John hi Marilyn how's it going
0:00:11super good yeah me too
0:00:14oh good yeah pretty good good news you
0:00:20know it's nice to just have a normal day
0:00:23yeah yeah yeah yeah I slept pretty well
0:00:29Sunday night is usually my best night of
0:00:31sleep yeah I mean when I say I'm doing
0:00:35pretty good it's not today's not a
0:00:36normal day and I just I guess I slept
0:00:39sort of well no no well I mean that's as
0:00:43good as it gets for me these days really
0:00:46yeah but I have to leave after our
0:00:50program to go be on the radio
0:00:52ah the radio did the terrestrial radio
0:00:55not our modern radio oh we should talk
0:00:57more about things that you do you um you
0:01:01uh surprise that's the wrong word I'm
0:01:04frequently surprised I'm buoyed to see
0:01:06that you go in perform places I saw I
0:01:08saw a picture of you with long hair
0:01:09performing you played the Pledger song
0:01:13on the the brothers podcast you're still
0:01:15out there you're still getting stuff
0:01:16done oh you know you got to get stuff
0:01:18done Merlin if you don't get it done and
0:01:20how's it gonna get done it's gonna do
0:01:21this stuff yeah that's right what can I
0:01:28ask what kind of you know is it a KEXP
0:01:30is it a Luke Burbank it's a what kind of
0:01:32situation you got no none of the above
0:01:34is say it's a KUOW which is our local
0:01:38public radio station and they have a
0:01:40they have a culture panel where they get
0:01:44they sit around and discuss cultural
0:01:48moments they say relatively like a
0:01:51temper aeneas or like yeah yeah yeah
0:01:53okay all right yeah I mean it's a it's
0:01:56just filler it's filler which is well a
0:01:5998 percent of all content is oh my
0:02:01goodness really oh I think so about
0:02:03content yeah do you think most content
0:02:05is filler I really do think it's in
0:02:07substantial I think so
0:02:10sure I mean you know like is the Azalea
0:02:12let's say let's just say that for
0:02:14instance why do you want to know
0:02:16anything about is he as they Iggy Iggy
0:02:18Azalea
0:02:19she's so fancy she's fancy but do you do
0:02:22you want to know anything about her I
0:02:24had to learn a little bit about her I
0:02:29don't take you off your topic about her
0:02:32because I'm a fan of Charli XCX who's
0:02:37the lady who sings the good part of that
0:02:38one song oh sure the part where she's
0:02:41not acting like like a black person from
0:02:42New Orleans English which is which is a
0:02:47really good part of that song huh and
0:02:50then then I heard there was some kind of
0:02:52dust up about her bona fides I should
0:02:55add oh you were bad news was yeah with
0:02:59the bad-boy demeanor and yeah
0:03:02tattoos twos Nicki Minaj monster monster
0:03:06everybody knows so the thing is I don't
0:03:08know anything I don't think really I'm
0:03:10really up on the rap these days monster
0:03:19song it's a really good song when I see
0:03:21that hotline bling you got the guy who
0:03:27did the who did the the Marvin Gaye song
0:03:30that was I'm definitely not doing this
0:03:33with you know updates in rap what that
0:03:37comes up on your cultural panel what if
0:03:38you're expected to opine on the rap of
0:03:40the day well this is the danger for me
0:03:42now because since I'm not on Twitter I
0:03:44don't know what the of the day stuff is
0:03:46I didn't of the day thing on the
0:03:49television a couple of days ago what do
0:03:52you think about but it's up but it's all
0:03:54stuff that I wouldn't have encountered
0:03:56it anyway you know they'll hand you a
0:03:57piece of paper here at the King 5
0:04:00breakfast show and it said there's a
0:04:05there's a hotel for sale outside of Reno
0:04:08that's decorated 100% in clowns and you
0:04:12read the thing and you're like oh and
0:04:14then you get online and or you get on
0:04:16the TV with them and they're like what
0:04:17do you think about that and you know and
0:04:19people that are making pancakes or
0:04:21people that are like getting the kids
0:04:23off to school or whatever it is that
0:04:24people do that watch those shows yeah
0:04:26they're like law or the
0:04:29there's a football player who was jet
0:04:31skiing any and he crashed and he lost a
0:04:35hundred and fifty thousand dollar
0:04:36diamond earring what do we think about
0:04:39that boys got something to say about it
0:04:42John I don't know a lot about producing
0:04:44content but IIIi think those are as you
0:04:48say problematic yeah you don't start out
0:04:50with something that's already funny and
0:04:52then talk about it well the thing is
0:04:56public radio is gonna be a little bit
0:04:57it's you know it's not gonna be so the
0:05:01humor is not gonna be so broad right
0:05:02they're they're actually gonna say
0:05:04here's an interesting thing right let
0:05:07the state legislature of Oklahoma says X
0:05:11and then but you know it's not gonna
0:05:13actually be like it's not gonna be
0:05:15biting nice it's it's cultural gentle
0:05:19its gentle but that's one of the one of
0:05:22the many things I do Merlyn in or in
0:05:25order to get stuff done
0:05:26in order to to make content for people
0:05:29and to ultimately I guess to to be in
0:05:35the mix you gotta stay in the mix you
0:05:37follow the mix it's hard to get back in
0:05:39oh yeah you can't get out you can't get
0:05:41out of the mix and I'm like riding a
0:05:42bike mm-hmm if you cuz then the mix
0:05:46separates right and you can your sauce
0:05:49yeah make your sauce you don't want to
0:05:53break your sauce but this week is gonna
0:05:54be this week's gonna be a hot week for
0:05:57me because because it's a it's Seafarer
0:06:00week here in Seattle OC for a week is
0:06:02that like a Fleet Week type situation
0:06:04that's right oh really
0:06:06and I am be a king of the of the obscene
0:06:10fair because your military service
0:06:13because again they need some content
0:06:20certain number of cubic inches of
0:06:23content right and John can provide that
0:06:25he can come in whereas little doctor
0:06:26doctor whose suit and you come in and
0:06:28you provide some content we get a crown
0:06:30I have a crown this please
0:06:37Cromwell they're on the they're on my
0:06:39Instagram account Oh insta cuts right
0:06:41you're still in the Instagram
0:06:42oh yeah use Instagram crown sword I have
0:06:47a tunic and so what you get in a
0:06:50situation like this is get a lot of
0:06:52events I'm gonna welcome the Blue Angels
0:06:55to town oh my goodness oh my goodness
0:06:58you've got a sash I do this is
0:07:02outstanding I was at a parade I was in a
0:07:05big parade 150,000 people watch the
0:07:08parade tremendous parade it was a big
0:07:10parade and then so this week I go I have
0:07:14dinner on on the flagship the US Navy
0:07:18admiral Pacific Admiral flagship boat I
0:07:23shake Anza and kiss babies with the Blue
0:07:26Angels quite a few times a lot of a lot
0:07:31of events a lot of different category go
0:07:33to the largest Rotary meeting in the
0:07:36northwest which they have every year at
0:07:40this time too
0:07:41you know because the rotor is very
0:07:42involved Wow things some breakfast some
0:07:48dinners and then I watch the and oh and
0:07:52throughout all of this I'm doing
0:07:53ceremonial night ends oh my goodness you
0:07:56you were born for this role John well
0:07:59this is the thing this is the kind of
0:08:00content that that I am that I that I can
0:08:05freely give the City of Seattle because
0:08:10without a king wearing a sash and a
0:08:14sword all you have is a bunch of guys in
0:08:17Navy uniforms milling around and then
0:08:20some Chamber of Commerce types and some
0:08:21rotary types and you know that the usual
0:08:24suspects mm-hmm but then you throw then
0:08:27you can throw a guy in a sash in there
0:08:29and it's anybody's it's a buddy's game
0:08:34at that point well you know if you're
0:08:36gonna have a monarchy you should have a
0:08:38king otherwise she's gonna have a power
0:08:41vacuum well won't be a monarchy well in
0:08:44mmm-hmm the other day I was asked I'm
0:08:49sorry I'm kind of distract I don't look
0:08:51at Instagram but now I'm looking at your
0:08:52Instagram you have all kinds of photos
0:08:53on here you know that's right it's my
0:08:55picture that you
0:08:56the brothers there's you oh look at you
0:08:58look at you and a little little sweet
0:08:59baby brother and look at that yeah oh
0:09:01did you get your fill sandbag buck no
0:09:04okay
0:09:05you all set you a Catwoman a Catwoman
0:09:09and I were looking at some comics I was
0:09:11asking her some questions because she is
0:09:13running the she was running the the
0:09:15booth I was like hey I don't see in here
0:09:17what I'm looking for and she came over
0:09:19someone took a a candid photograph wait
0:09:22you looking for Oklahoma sex cat sex cat
0:09:28yeah yeah I wasn't looking for that but
0:09:30now that you remind me of Oklahoma the
0:09:32sex cat I'm you know I should add it I
0:09:35should add it to my list you should make
0:09:36an apple note oh there's your mom look
0:09:38at your mom oh so that they so like for
0:09:41instance the other day I think that when
0:09:45they asked me to be King Neptune they
0:09:49had in mind that they wanted Seafarer to
0:09:51be a little bit hipper than it's been
0:09:54last year the King Neptune was was a
0:09:57member of the Seattle Seahawks and and
0:10:02he had a fun time with it when he
0:10:07bothered but it was that that was their
0:10:12typical the typical mistake I think that
0:10:14that you make in a situation like this
0:10:16where you're like this is an this is an
0:10:18honorary position and we're gonna give
0:10:20it to an upstanding citizen and then you
0:10:22pick somebody that that is in your own
0:10:25world
0:10:26you're a Chamber of Commerce the kind of
0:10:28organization you pick somebody from that
0:10:30world yeah it's impressive in that world
0:10:34like a Seahawk but that's not very fun
0:10:39you know what I mean like you go to a
0:10:41Rotary meeting with a guy that has been
0:10:43to a lot of rotary meetings it's very
0:10:45it's just like it's very internal and
0:10:48then you realize oh we're producing an
0:10:50event for the whole city but but we're
0:10:53doing the we're making the old mistake
0:10:55of just like it's a circle jerk hit him
0:11:00where they ain't you yes you want power
0:11:02but you obviously you want somebody who
0:11:05you know has respect for the service
0:11:07mm-hmm
0:11:09drawing power somebody who loves the
0:11:11city of Seattle and who isn't just
0:11:13coasting yeah I also think you probably
0:11:15want somebody who's a good sport
0:11:16you gotta be a good sport right but
0:11:19there's the version of being King
0:11:20Neptune good sport where you stand there
0:11:22gamely with your sash and your crown on
0:11:25and they hand you a piece of paper and
0:11:27they say read this and then we're gonna
0:11:31Knight this your fellow citizen and you
0:11:37gamely read it and everyone gamely
0:11:39applauds but then there's then you there
0:11:44the UM another option which is swing for
0:11:48the fences and in this year they said
0:11:50why don't we get why don't we try and
0:11:51make C fare a little bit more fun and
0:11:52they got they asked me to be king them
0:11:55too and it's hard for me to tell I I do
0:11:59know that I'm putting pressure on the
0:12:02organization by being a little too fun I
0:12:05don't know how much sting it's kind of a
0:12:09Footloose type situation where a little
0:12:11bit where they bring you in because they
0:12:12say this guy's a good sport he looks
0:12:14great in an outfit and a crown but now
0:12:16now it's a in the second act things are
0:12:19turning around a little bit and they're
0:12:20going oh it's this guy cuz it's got
0:12:22gonna be a pistol well a little bit of a
0:12:24pistol right so the Seafarer grand
0:12:28marshals of the parade who are it's
0:12:30another honorary position there are a
0:12:32lot of these I think the grand marshals
0:12:35of the parade and a couple of years ago
0:12:37one of the grand marshals was Duff
0:12:39McKagan my my good pal who is also a
0:12:41Seattle light a very vociferous
0:12:44supporter of Seattle
0:12:45that's just what is it it's an honorary
0:12:47thing they hand you a scepter you go I
0:12:49hereby commence the parade and you know
0:12:52it's but it's a fun thing it's a nice
0:12:54honor well this year last year they had
0:12:57Chris Pratt and an actress who everybody
0:13:02talks about very excitedly and who each
0:13:05time her name is mentioned I can't
0:13:07remember which one she is okay but one
0:13:10that everybody was excited to meet last
0:13:11year now I would be very excited to meet
0:13:13Chris Pratt because he's my favorite
0:13:15actress yeah he's a very good actor
0:13:18and I have to say just for what it's
0:13:19worth he's also seems like a good sport
0:13:22for good sport right and so it was very
0:13:23exciting so this year again they tried
0:13:26to maybe maybe they tried to duplicate
0:13:29their success yet last year so he
0:13:31brought along his lady friend and Anna
0:13:33Faris Anna Faris that's right and
0:13:35everybody's very excited about Hannah
0:13:36Ferris mm-hmm
0:13:37this year they got James woke and Billy
0:13:40Burke of the television show zoo Y which
0:13:45is on I don't know what the WB your CBS
0:13:48I don't know oh my goodness
0:13:50zoo better Marshalls so these are these
0:13:53actors and what they are is some actors
0:13:57from a thing that TV show like if it was
0:13:59if we were at comic-con Waterson to you
0:14:02yes oh we're about this I mean who knows
0:14:06ya know if it was nothing I've heard
0:14:08about there's a comic-con and I walked
0:14:10past these guys at a booth I would go
0:14:11sure of course but here they are and
0:14:13they're presented to me as like here are
0:14:15the grand marshals of the parade and you
0:14:16are meant to Knight them and then they
0:14:20commence the parade and it's all this
0:14:22thing this the it's a little bit of it
0:14:25some song and dance is what we're doing
0:14:26we're going slightly absolutely so here
0:14:29they come in the way I met this event
0:14:31and there some there are quite a few
0:14:32Admirals which is very exciting I met
0:14:34the commander of the Coast Guard for the
0:14:36Pacific region I met the the compare the
0:14:40Admiral of the Stennis Strike Force
0:14:44sleeps the aircraft carrier strike force
0:14:48another Admirals I made some I made some
0:14:52business with some animals you know I
0:14:53did a little look some walls with them
0:14:56another talk about game those guys have
0:14:59to be game because they do a lot of this
0:15:00type of thing anyway so up they walk in
0:15:03here comes Billy Burke who's a guy
0:15:05clearly my age but handsome Billy Billy
0:15:09Burke okay Lee Burke he was in the
0:15:11Twilight series Oh anyway he's wearing
0:15:15son I know this guy I thought Billy
0:15:17Burke was the good Queen and Wizard of
0:15:19Oz that's why that's the difference a
0:15:21different Billy Burke okay but he's
0:15:24wearing sunglasses he's got his hair is
0:15:26dirty hair up in a man bun he's wearing
0:15:28a Seahawks t-shirt a dirty unzipped
0:15:33hoodie and some shorts
0:15:34Annie and I'm like seriously that
0:15:37doesn't bring much gravitas visa V
0:15:39marshalling know somebody somebody told
0:15:42you that you were gonna be the grand
0:15:44marshal of a parade and you show up in
0:15:47your pajamas I was offended and so did
0:15:52you try to keep it in no I'm standing in
0:15:56front of this group of local dignitaries
0:15:58and I call him up and as they as they
0:16:00walked out my mom like Billy you didn't
0:16:02have to get dressed up all special for
0:16:05the parade
0:16:06and Billy Burke I don't then he put on a
0:16:10strange smile but I don't think he liked
0:16:12being roasted and then I said a few
0:16:15times as I was knighting him like you
0:16:17know Billy Billy made the special effort
0:16:20to roll out of bed to come be the grand
0:16:22marshal of Seattle's parade and I think
0:16:23we should honor him with this great
0:16:25honor oh my goodness and it's and the
0:16:29thing is I'm not being hostile I'm being
0:16:31funny it's fun Billy Burke
0:16:34fifty-year-olds grand marshal of a
0:16:36parade and he you know he should be able
0:16:41to take a little bit of this because he
0:16:42chose he chose that outfit not you yeah
0:16:45that's right cuz fuck you Billy and
0:16:46thing is James woke a younger man the
0:16:50star of the star of this TV show James
0:16:52work he showed up in a collared shirt
0:16:54with some pants now he didn't tuck his
0:16:56shirt in but he's a young person and he
0:17:00was loving it he was loving that Billy
0:17:03was getting raked over the coals so it
0:17:05was a little bit of a roasty situation
0:17:07is what happened huh now that is not
0:17:11what is I think typical of this event
0:17:17you unintentionally or maybe you made a
0:17:20little edgy I made a little some fun
0:17:23here we're gonna have a little fun and
0:17:25since since I established that tone then
0:17:27I knighted a couple of admirals and I
0:17:30gave them a little bit of the same kind
0:17:32of business like oh here is the Admiral
0:17:36of the Pacific Coast Guard fleet
0:17:39commander and I said is Alaska part of
0:17:42your area and he said no they're a
0:17:44separate group and I said oh so then
0:17:48you you have Montana and Idaho the two
0:17:52great coastal states some boy and he was
0:17:55mad and then I realized oh right the
0:17:58Missouri River the Snake River the
0:18:00Columbia River like the Coast Guard is
0:18:02also in the rivers okay and so then I
0:18:05you know so I corrected myself and I was
0:18:07like oh you also are all the waterways
0:18:10all the great waterways he and I made
0:18:13good friends the Admiral and I but you
0:18:16know a little bit but I think the people
0:18:19at seif they're the ones who have asked
0:18:21me to do this job are now hopping up and
0:18:26down not in anger but in anxiety because
0:18:30what is the king gonna say next kind of
0:18:33thing which is I think the exact kind of
0:18:38fun that they were hoping to have in
0:18:40just slightly smaller measure and so
0:18:46this is the this is the fun for me right
0:18:48this is a ceremonial position I'm not
0:18:50getting paid it's this is all
0:18:51interesting this is a old boy know what
0:18:55about Chris Pratt is he doing it for
0:18:56free everybody does this for free this
0:18:58Chris Pratt brought his family to
0:19:00Seattle and did this job for free yeah I
0:19:05mean you know I'm sure they put him up
0:19:07yeah but uh you should check that out
0:19:09that mmm that sounds a little bit like a
0:19:11jamup to me it's the type of thing that
0:19:14is I think it falls into the the sort of
0:19:20general community service aspect of
0:19:22being famous you get honored with these
0:19:26things and if you say yes there's no you
0:19:30know what does Seafarer gonna give give
0:19:31him five grand I mean that's not that's
0:19:34not something Chris Pratt's gonna put
0:19:35his family and I think me I don't know I
0:19:39don't know how much of this is image
0:19:40management but I've seen tons of
0:19:42delightful pictures of him visiting kids
0:19:44in hospitals and bringing them Lego and
0:19:46doing things in costume and he seems
0:19:47like kind of a Mitch like I don't know
0:19:49if that's aI don't know if that's like a
0:19:51rock the Dwayne Johnson type situation
0:19:53where he's just doing image management
0:19:55who knows but but he seems he seems like
0:19:58he'd be like a pretty cool guy maybe
0:19:59just totally like him on Parks and Rec
0:20:02it's the reason why he's one of my
0:20:04favorite actresses yeah but I think past
0:20:07a certain point right what will what
0:20:10this will be is Chris Pratt probably has
0:20:13a foundation and then this he'll do this
0:20:18in return for the opportunity to put his
0:20:26foundation for kids on the masthead of
0:20:29some other you know what I mean like
0:20:31it's it's a different kind of currencies
0:20:34the wrong word but for lack of a better
0:20:35word it's a different kind of currency
0:20:37it's a kind of social tokens that we
0:20:40pass back and forth we try and do the
0:20:41right thing and these are the this is
0:20:44what the Rotary Club is all about right
0:20:46the Rotary Club sends some students to
0:20:48go bei Japan and Kobe Japan send some
0:20:51students to rotary and one of those
0:20:54students one day goes to college and
0:20:57become a majors in business management
0:20:59and ends up being the deputy director of
0:21:02the port and rotary pins appends a star
0:21:07on him and though her and the star then
0:21:13goes up on a on a piece of wood on the
0:21:16wall of a place and you know it's like
0:21:18there is a there is a world of
0:21:20honorarium a world of and everyone is
0:21:27very proud there's a lot of like pride
0:21:30in the work that they do
0:21:31it feels meaningful it feels like it
0:21:34spreads a fraternity thus the whole
0:21:38sister-city notion of like and now
0:21:41someone who's here from our sister city
0:21:43in Uzbekistan and they brought an
0:21:48entourage and you know and being like
0:21:53being is even tangentially involved in
0:21:59that in this kind of world like I have
0:22:01to I have to also realize they're
0:22:04creating content for their own markets
0:22:06and sure again it's it's a kind of thumb
0:22:11I don't visible but a kind of yes
0:22:14you're saying it's it's it's content and
0:22:16it's it's a kind of reputational Wafi
0:22:19tokens like there's it's interesting
0:22:20you're moving kind of invisible
0:22:22resources around yeah and and I think I
0:22:25think what what the benefit of these
0:22:28things is to the people that that are
0:22:31knee-deep in it is like this is where
0:22:34after you've awarded the the blue ribbon
0:22:37for the state's largest cow or after
0:22:41you've sent 25 kids to college and
0:22:44Antarctica for the semester then as
0:22:47you're standing around at the end of the
0:22:48meeting somebody like my dad says hey
0:22:53Bill I want to meet Tony and Tony goes
0:22:57hey Bill how's it going I'm trying to
0:22:59you know I'm the guy that's trying to
0:23:01get the permits to build the sixty five
0:23:03storey office tower on the land adjacent
0:23:07to where you are trying to also build a
0:23:10tower and you are holding up my permits
0:23:12haha why don't we figure that out and
0:23:15it's like oh you're a Rotarian Wow and
0:23:18like that kind of handshake II thing is
0:23:21what people that aren't in the room and
0:23:25what you know what democratic socialists
0:23:28are what makes them so suspicious and
0:23:31angry because it seems like that's where
0:23:34all chummy yeah that's where all the
0:23:36deals are getting made and that's why
0:23:37those organizations exist now being
0:23:41inside them right I see like oh that's
0:23:43not why they exist but it is a it is an
0:23:47element it is a fringe benefit of it
0:23:50that the people that are invited are the
0:23:53ones that are seen to need to be there
0:23:55and then that's how things get done and
0:24:01it's uh it's not very creative and it's
0:24:06not very it's not it's not fun by any
0:24:09standards that we have like it's not
0:24:12like the things that are supposed to be
0:24:14funny aren't funny the things that are
0:24:15supposed to be neat aren't neat there
0:24:18are a lot of PowerPoint demonstrations
0:24:20where people are showing slideshows of
0:24:22all the kids that they've helped but it
0:24:26really does
0:24:27come from I don't know a place in those
0:24:31people that is altruistic mm-hmm a
0:24:35desire to help and I have no idea how
0:24:40but but I now AM on not on the I'm in
0:24:46the anteroom of these people because I'm
0:24:50because whatever they pick me out as
0:24:53somebody that's game that will come to
0:24:56these things and be a little roasty and
0:24:59be a little bit because the thing is in
0:25:02a group of in a group where the
0:25:04admiral's are standing around right
0:25:05there's a lot of respect for the
0:25:09Admirals and the Admirals are standing
0:25:12around used to being respected it's
0:25:14their number one job description respect
0:25:17these guys right like they're every
0:25:19single room they've ever walked into
0:25:21from the time that they were a
0:25:23lieutenant junior grade some large
0:25:27proportion of the people in that room
0:25:28are respecting them mm-hmm no one ever
0:25:31disrespects them except maybe and part
0:25:34of it is um you learn so early on that
0:25:36you get respect by giving respect
0:25:38there's a tremendous respect as the
0:25:41currency right and so that but the
0:25:44Admirals in this situation are like
0:25:46they'd to go to a lot of rotary meetings
0:25:48they behaved respectfully but you don't
0:25:52get the sense that they you know part of
0:25:56respect sad to say is that you are
0:26:02impressed and maybe a little afraid
0:26:04right I mean certainly the respect
0:26:06they're used to commanding has a healthy
0:26:08element of fear in it because the people
0:26:12that are like yes sir are ones that can
0:26:17be in big trouble
0:26:18if they say yes sir wrong and so the
0:26:22Admirals are in this thing and there are
0:26:23a lot of rote Aryans and and people from
0:26:25the city and the animals aren't really
0:26:26very afraid of them you know they're
0:26:29it's not like somebody from Seattle is
0:26:31going to say we're not giving the Navy
0:26:34permits to park their boats here this
0:26:36year because we're making I mean it's
0:26:38possible if we elected a mayor
0:26:41was a real radical but ultimately the
0:26:45Navy's not worried about Seattle but a
0:26:49situation like that you know my job I as
0:26:54I see it is to because the lot of these
0:26:57animals aren't that much older than me
0:27:00right I know I know 54 and so although
0:27:06I'm iris I respect to the office and I
0:27:12respect the Navy let's say I don't have
0:27:16a lot of social fear because what is it
0:27:20Admiral gonna do to me what is what are
0:27:22these people gonna do to me and so no
0:27:27one ever roasts Admirals particularly
0:27:29not at a thing like this that's so low
0:27:31weight like this is these are low power
0:27:34events for these people the Seafarer
0:27:37parade you know they do they don't come
0:27:40expecting to be ribbed publicly and and
0:27:43I think personally that they love it I
0:27:46think it's fun for them I think that a
0:27:49everybody likes to be roasted a little
0:27:51and it's a like nobody ever
0:27:56nobody ever sidles up to them and says
0:27:58so tell me is that do you don't you get
0:28:01tired of wearing these uniforms that are
0:28:03half polyester I mean couldn't you have
0:28:05a uniform Taylor do you think they like
0:28:06that I think they do because it's a kind
0:28:10of banter that they it's the sort of
0:28:13banter that I would you know that I
0:28:14would lay on you yeah and they and they
0:28:17do have those feelings like so I'm
0:28:19standing next to the King County Sheriff
0:28:21who is a beep he's a big deal here and
0:28:25we're watching the opening remarks and I
0:28:29and there's a young deputy standing next
0:28:31to him who's not his who's it basically
0:28:34looks like his son and is sort of acting
0:28:37like his son and I don't think he's a
0:28:38bodyguard he's just his he's probably
0:28:42his aide-de-camp
0:28:43he says Ballena called Theia is his body
0:28:45manners back now but yeah he says he's
0:28:48the guy that's gonna eat his purse he
0:28:50gets his Leviathan and
0:28:51he needs a magnifying glass he knows
0:28:53where to pull it out right yeah so I'm
0:28:55standing next to the camp eight to camp
0:28:57what a great term aid to camp it's got
0:28:59to be what he is and I look over in the
0:29:02and the King County Sheriff has a side
0:29:04arm and the side arm you know it's
0:29:09unlikely that this sixty year old man is
0:29:12ever gonna draw his sidearm again but
0:29:14it's there because it's part of the
0:29:16uniform uh-huh and I looked down and it
0:29:19has a single piece of scotch tape
0:29:22wrapped around the handle wrapped around
0:29:25the grip and I look at him I kind of
0:29:29think about it for a second and I walk
0:29:31over and I say Sheriff and he looks at
0:29:36me and I'm wearing a crown yeah yes so
0:29:39he's so he's not gonna say hello citizen
0:29:41he's gonna say what the fuck is this now
0:29:44and I said sheriff I can't help but
0:29:47notice that your sidearm is held
0:29:48together with scotch tape can you and he
0:29:53starts to laugh and his aide camp starts
0:29:55to laugh and I said can you give me a
0:29:59some explanation for why the sheriff of
0:30:03King County can't find a screw for his
0:30:07or whatever and he says well you know
0:30:09the the grip is a little bit Wiggly and
0:30:14so I fixed it and you're the first
0:30:16person that's ever said anything about
0:30:18it and now my aide camp is laughing at
0:30:22me so thanks very much for that Wow and
0:30:25I figured either his kid put it on there
0:30:28he kept it on cuz it was sweet Oh cuz
0:30:31you know get a lot of that your kid put
0:30:32stuff on your things I'm sure it was
0:30:34that or there was maybe so he could get
0:30:37his fingerprints off there if you need
0:30:38it to no just a single piece of scotch
0:30:41tape all right and and so I said well
0:30:44you know sheriff that's wonderful
0:30:46because I'm gonna be able now to report
0:30:49to the citizens of King County that you
0:30:50are not wasting precious County
0:30:52resources on doing things like fixing
0:30:56the grip of your gun
0:30:57yeah which you're unlikely to draw and
0:30:59so then he's like oh here's I got a live
0:31:03one here and we sit and chat
0:31:05because in a way that kind of banter
0:31:10establishes establishes that there is a
0:31:16that my lack of fear is a kind of peer
0:31:21I'm establishing a peer relationship
0:31:24right like I am clearly not a peer of
0:31:27the King County Sheriff in any respect
0:31:30right sort of classic sense not in the
0:31:33classic sense but I'm also not
0:31:36intimidated by him and that's unusual
0:31:39for him right I mean the only people
0:31:42that aren't intimidated by the King
0:31:43County Sheriff are his wife and his kids
0:31:45probably because everybody else that he
0:31:48meets in it in the course of this
0:31:50situation is either someone who reports
0:31:52to him or someone who needs him needs
0:31:55his political support mm-hmm I mean
0:31:58that's it's um I don't mean this
0:32:00disparagingly but that's a managerial
0:32:02job big time right I mean I mean you
0:32:06know I wouldn't Domitian I'm sure that
0:32:08he would be happy to jump in and grab a
0:32:09broom if he needed to but like his job
0:32:11is very that's a high level
0:32:13administrative job he manages other
0:32:14managers and he came up through the
0:32:16ranks and you know one of the Dave
0:32:18Reichert who was a former King County
0:32:20Sheriff became a US congressman so it's
0:32:22a political job okay all right and he
0:32:25goes to these events and everything
0:32:28everything that we're looking at at this
0:32:30event is within his jurisdiction he is
0:32:33the sheriff of all of this and so
0:32:36everybody at this thing is like sheriff
0:32:39you know thanks for coming and also we
0:32:43you know we're looking for your help if
0:32:47next year at the whatchamacallit thing
0:32:50and so no one ever comes up and says
0:32:55what's the deal with your broken gun
0:32:56giggling yeah what's up with that and
0:32:58and he likes it right everybody likes
0:33:01that everybody wants somebody to come up
0:33:03and take the steam out of them or at
0:33:05least everybody who's normal like I'm
0:33:08sure there's a king I'm sure there's a
0:33:09sheriff somebody somewhere who's like
0:33:11move along citizen I mean in my
0:33:16estimation that
0:33:18is less bothersome to people who are
0:33:20both powerful and confident right there
0:33:22are there are people in positions of
0:33:24power that are not that confident
0:33:25nominee any names here and then there
0:33:28are other people who are very confident
0:33:29but don't have power and that kind of
0:33:31thing if you haven't gotten through the
0:33:33ranks and moved up feels like a slight
0:33:36that must be addressed in the moment it
0:33:39much like you went on like a playground
0:33:41right power you can you can laugh it off
0:33:44because you know let's just not gonna
0:33:46bother you well and he is a he's a he's
0:33:49a politician ultimately and so he's not
0:33:52gonna get to that job and be good at it
0:33:55if he doesn't have a sense of humor
0:33:56because it's you've got to you've got to
0:33:59be fielding a lot of crazy shit all day
0:34:01and a few minutes later I'm standing
0:34:04with the King County Executive who is
0:34:07the sheriff's boss nominally who's a
0:34:10young guy and actually a friend of mine
0:34:13like somebody that I know socially and
0:34:16he's the I think the greatest politician
0:34:19in the state by a large margin and
0:34:21everybody thinks so his name is Dow
0:34:22Constantine and he is a he's just a
0:34:26great politician and he's a he's a
0:34:29liberal he gets things done and he's
0:34:30also a cool guy right he's at this event
0:34:32he's dressed appropriately except he's
0:34:35wearing converse because he's a because
0:34:38he's a Justin Trudeau he's having a
0:34:41little fun he's having a little fun
0:34:43because it's a fun time but he's also
0:34:46got a blazer on and he's he he found in
0:34:49his collection of accoutrements all his
0:34:52little Seafarer pins and buttons that
0:34:54he's received over the years as various
0:34:56like every one of these little things
0:34:58that some King Neptune has given him
0:35:00like I hereby proclaim that you are the
0:35:03king of the day and they hand you a
0:35:06little pin Dow has them arranged
0:35:10somewhere so that when he's coming to
0:35:13this some assistant says and here are
0:35:15your Seafarer pins and he puts them on
0:35:17his blazer so that it's just like and
0:35:19that's how you're a good politician you
0:35:22know you show up at this and you're
0:35:23wearing the right pins
0:35:25and so you know that's let me pause you
0:35:28for a second because I like that phrase
0:35:30what was the phrase knowing the right
0:35:31pins that's really that's kind of a
0:35:35really good way to put it because it
0:35:36also encompasses a lot of the different
0:35:39kinds of things we're talking about
0:35:40whether that's Rotary Club or your
0:35:42father you know uh councilor you know
0:35:44like knowing all of the ways to like
0:35:47wear the right pin becomes very
0:35:49important in these situations right
0:35:51remember remember how politicians were
0:35:54being bullied into wearing American flag
0:35:56pins during the Bush administration oh
0:35:58it was it was this I remember after I
0:36:00want to say after 9/11 there was this or
0:36:02things like which late-night talk-show
0:36:04host will be the first to stop wearing
0:36:06up a flag pin yeah and if you if you
0:36:10appear there was a while there where if
0:36:12you appeared as a public figure without
0:36:14a flag pin on it was cause for censure
0:36:17especially if you were a Steph you were
0:36:19a a public servant and I think I think
0:36:23you will still see an awful lot of flag
0:36:25pins on the lapels of I mean I don't
0:36:28think there's a single Republican
0:36:30Congress person that doesn't have a
0:36:31flight well a lot of them wear that that
0:36:33goofy slightly oversized badge that
0:36:36Congress person's get that looks a
0:36:39little silly because when I see them
0:36:40talking on the MSNBC it looks a little
0:36:42bit like like a POG maybe or something
0:36:46you know it's a big pin trading culture
0:36:48at theme parks sure I think this is how
0:36:51that the sheriff with the cowboy hat got
0:36:52a lot of his Mad Max when Morton Joe
0:36:55pins is just trading with other cowboy
0:36:57sheriffs yeah this whole penetrating
0:36:59culture and I think that's part of what
0:37:01you're describing here knowing the right
0:37:02pin but but also it encompasses the
0:37:04things like the things that I look at
0:37:06and see as magical like the ability to
0:37:08remember people's names yeah what they
0:37:11do what they used to do who they know
0:37:14who their family is and to do that
0:37:17without going back like I are you you
0:37:20know that's I I just look at that and I
0:37:22just said look at something like that
0:37:23sheriff I just go man that guy's got it
0:37:25wired right well and you think about you
0:37:27think about Dow how many different
0:37:30events he goes to where they hand him a
0:37:33pin and he goes home and somehow puts
0:37:37that pin into a system
0:37:38where he says the next time I go to the
0:37:41to the King County reservoir maintenance
0:37:46directors Jamboree I'm gonna be able to
0:37:50put this pin on my lapel and and when I
0:37:52arrive and they see it they are going to
0:37:55be chuffed right there's no look that
0:37:56you can tell I'm excited and this is my
0:37:58fifth one of these look at my lapel I'm
0:38:00wearing I'm wearing my flight of pins
0:38:01it's it's phenomenal you know that
0:38:04ability and that and the knowledge that
0:38:07that is the thing you need to need that
0:38:08you need to do but so I'm standing there
0:38:11in down an hour just talking about our
0:38:12families and we're talking about our
0:38:13lives and a guy walks up and he's one of
0:38:17the people I've I have honored that day
0:38:19who's a who runs an organization that
0:38:22supports the Navy and he says you know
0:38:25hey sorry to interrupt I just wanted to
0:38:27say hi just wanted to say thank you
0:38:28Dowell remembers his name Dom knows who
0:38:30he is and he says just wanted to make
0:38:33sure you got my email inviting you to
0:38:36the event that we're doing and it's a
0:38:41little bit of a you know I know I know I
0:38:43know that message I've gotten a message
0:38:45and and this is a protocol breach
0:38:47because we're at a thing dows wearing is
0:38:49his fun shoes but you can tell that this
0:38:53man is very earnest about his work and
0:38:57as part of that earnestness he does not
0:39:00recognize social
0:39:04[Music]
0:39:05whatever the way the wiggle room is
0:39:07between this is an event where you say
0:39:10something like that this is not slightly
0:39:12cringy breach of protocol a little bit
0:39:15but Dow is very very graceful sure and
0:39:18Dow says you know I don't have any staff
0:39:22members with me right now and so and
0:39:25then he makes this self-effacement joke
0:39:28so he then he says and you know honestly
0:39:30like I just go where they tell me so I
0:39:33don't know I don't you know it's his
0:39:36kind of way of saying I don't answer my
0:39:38own email when it is things like this
0:39:40but when I get back to the office I'll
0:39:42ask them to make sure that I am you know
0:39:46right D write it down
0:39:48nope he just remembers just remembers
0:39:51and and the guy kind of presses his
0:39:54attack a little bit well we'd like you
0:39:55to be at the event and you know it's
0:39:57very important because we're doing it
0:39:58for the Navy and we in the you know we
0:40:00and support our troops and Dow says you
0:40:03know as soon as I get back a minute I'm
0:40:05going to talk to my staff about it and
0:40:06just sort of gracefully does his thing
0:40:08but that is what is happening at these
0:40:12things whether it is overt like that or
0:40:17whether a person walks up and says hey
0:40:21great to see you Dow and Dow knows that
0:40:24this person wants them at their at his
0:40:27event and he's able to send a coded
0:40:29message to them like hey great well I'll
0:40:31see you the LC in a week it's in a
0:40:33situation like that it's a little bit
0:40:35the phrase comes to mind is holding
0:40:36court where if you actually think about
0:40:38a regent sitting in some kind of a room
0:40:41where people come in and come in you
0:40:43know talk to them about things in that
0:40:45kind of situation dow is his name
0:40:47sheriff down no the sheriff is not down
0:40:51who's down Dow is the executive what am
0:40:55i sorry Dow is the executive is the
0:40:56nominal boss well he's that person if
0:41:01that person that person has the
0:41:03opportunity to say at that point to this
0:41:06person oh by the way I got your note I
0:41:10haven't had a chance to respond to it
0:41:12but I feel pretty sure we can get that
0:41:14on the schedule yeah how's the
0:41:15opportunity where he could say that but
0:41:17if he didn't say that you asking them
0:41:19about it you're basically doing that
0:41:20thing where you say did you get my email
0:41:22about about your email okay don't do
0:41:24that don't people especially in social
0:41:27situations it's it's such a it's such a
0:41:30PR bad PR person thing to do that whole
0:41:33like well if I do it in public and I'm
0:41:36smiling like you have to be nice to me
0:41:38yeah well and it's how I it's how a PR
0:41:41person justifies their their bowl of
0:41:45cereal right because they get to that's
0:41:47my job yeah that's their job and they're
0:41:49trying to get those Glengarry leads all
0:41:51the time but but an event like this
0:41:55every single person in there is holding
0:41:58court simultaneously there are no people
0:42:01in there that are not either with I mean
0:42:04everybody had stars on there
0:42:05and the sheriff has four stars on his
0:42:09collars but he are on his collar but he
0:42:11he reports to Dowe who is wearing
0:42:14converse but functions yeah yeah but
0:42:17Dalles got stars on his collar too and
0:42:19everybody knows it it's just down Stars
0:42:22our Seafarer pins cuz he knows how to do
0:42:24that the only people in there that
0:42:28aren't that don't have stars on their
0:42:30collars are Billy Burke and James woke
0:42:33who are there because they're rich
0:42:36Hollywood hansoms and then me
0:42:41yeah and I'm wearing a fucking crown
0:42:43yeah that speaks for itself
0:42:45it really does right a crown like you
0:42:48because the crown says suggests I am
0:42:50ceremonially the boss of everyone here
0:42:54obviously we all know that that is not
0:42:56true well I think the purpose is for the
0:42:59purposes of this event if that has been
0:43:02conferred on you I think people should
0:43:03be deferential to you and they are and
0:43:06that is part of the fun every one of
0:43:08these Admirals said do I bow mm-hm and
0:43:11each time I say yes and and bend the
0:43:15knee as they do the fucking two of these
0:43:18Admirals got down on their knees right
0:43:20that's a good sport
0:43:22it's a fucking good sport because
0:43:24they're politicians - mm-hmm you don't
0:43:26get to be a three-star general or
0:43:29Admiral without being pulled it's a
0:43:31little bit of what one might call social
0:43:33power exchange you have you're having
0:43:36fun with it
0:43:37fucking-a mm-hmm and Mike and what I the
0:43:41only thing I lack is a clown nose
0:43:42because that's that's what the crown is
0:43:45right come on and I went to great
0:43:48lengths because because you have a lot
0:43:51of dignity I would not call that a clown
0:43:53nose you're a very you have a you have a
0:43:55an excess of dignity thank you I grew my
0:43:58beard a little bit long so that I look
0:43:59like hanging up to it a little bit more
0:44:02mm-hmm but but I feel like the the job
0:44:06description that the Seafarer people had
0:44:09in mind
0:44:10was
0:44:12business-casual plus a sash and a crap
0:44:17[Music]
0:44:18that's what they expect okay and I have
0:44:23spent the last month putting together a
0:44:25pretty good replica of of like tsar
0:44:33nicholas ii tunic from just before the
0:44:38world war i have all the elements i have
0:44:42the you know i have the the star of
0:44:45Constantine and I have the the
0:44:48additional gold braid and the gigantic
0:44:51epaulets and the you've done some
0:44:53readings on your work here the sword
0:44:55belt and I mean if you take a picture of
0:44:57me and my tunic and you put it up next
0:44:59to Tsar Nicholas he's got a lot more
0:45:01bling
0:45:02and each one of the nice things about
0:45:04being a Tsar is that you can have
0:45:06knee-high patent leather boots made for
0:45:08yourself which would be set that I'm
0:45:11like I'm frankly teetering on making me
0:45:14- I just thought telling but so sweet in
0:45:16a tunic befitting a star and that is not
0:45:20what Seafarer expected they're not
0:45:23displeased
0:45:23it certainly is inhabiting the role what
0:45:26they expected was you come in looking
0:45:29like a golf dad basically they want to
0:45:31golf dad with a sash lalala and and
0:45:34that's but they got they got a little
0:45:36more than they bargained for they wanted
0:45:38to reach a younger demo and they brought
0:45:40in a new king with some of some fresh
0:45:41energy and he he brought a whole outfit
0:45:44yeah right and it's a you know like the
0:45:46outfit oh so fun to wear it's so fun to
0:45:49march around in this outfit with its you
0:45:51know the epaulets really the epaulets
0:45:54really communicate not only that you
0:45:55have broad shoulders but that those
0:45:57broad shoulders are covered with
0:45:58cthulhu's of gold which is you know like
0:46:04the fucking Admirals
0:46:07who are marching around this thing have
0:46:09giant gold epaulettes
0:46:11it's just that style has changed and the
0:46:14epaulets now are flat and have a lot of
0:46:15stars on them but they're still freaking
0:46:17gold epaulettes and my epaulets are just
0:46:19what they would have worn a hundred
0:46:20years ago a little bit more at Gilbert
0:46:22and Sullivan yeah I mean there's a you
0:46:25know I don't want to look like
0:46:26Nutcracker why'd you put that image in
0:46:35my head that's funny like the Nutcracker
0:46:39with some homemade makeup I am
0:46:43essentially I am essentially there is
0:46:45the Nutcracker the you know the the game
0:46:53I mean initially I what I wanted was to
0:46:55come dressed as Master and Commander and
0:47:01it was very difficult to put that outfit
0:47:04together so that it looked good with a
0:47:06crown and the problem of the problem of
0:47:11the crown is that it it's very important
0:47:17to see fair because that's what they
0:47:22made they made a crown and they thought
0:47:25they were having fun with that and that
0:47:28that's an example of like we are fun and
0:47:30we're having fun with but with this and
0:47:32we made a crown and a sash for our King
0:47:34and it's an easy thing to put on
0:47:36somebody who's wearing business casual
0:47:38and make it make the event fun it's like
0:47:43instant King just add crown right you
0:47:45can walk in and you're wearing a suit
0:47:47from Men's Wearhouse and they put the
0:47:48sash on you you put a crown on and then
0:47:50unite somebody everybody has a good
0:47:52laugh yeah but Seafarer when i was a kid
0:47:56was one of these regional festivals that
0:48:01used to happen in every in every town
0:48:03every small town every to local every
0:48:06town that wasn't because they're the
0:48:08country didn't have a unified culture
0:48:11Seafarer was an event that where seattle
0:48:14went off went bananas like king neptune
0:48:19had an entourage of 20 people oh my
0:48:23goodness they were all wearing giant
0:48:25hats with feathers in them everyone was
0:48:29drunk it was there were parties people
0:48:34would really get into the spirit oh my
0:48:36god I mean my mom talks about it she's
0:48:38she's like
0:48:40Seafarer was the event of the season
0:48:42there were multiple parades there was a
0:48:45giant parade to kick it off then there
0:48:48was a giant parade in the middle and
0:48:49then there was a giant parade at the end
0:48:51that's kind of event my late father
0:48:53would call it grab-ass
0:48:54it was a huge grab-ass and everyone came
0:48:57from miles around
0:48:58the mayor and that you know and the end
0:49:01Neptune was a was a big deal right
0:49:04during that time during the Seafarer
0:49:07month King Neptune never bought a drink
0:49:10in any bar in the city there are Seafair
0:49:13pirates and sea fair clowns and they
0:49:15would they would come into bars and
0:49:17restaurants and just start singing their
0:49:19body songs and they would take you know
0:49:22food off of people's plates and
0:49:24everybody had a grand old wry bald time
0:49:26and I'm sure at that during that era
0:49:29right there was also a lot of
0:49:30impropriety that wouldn't fly these days
0:49:33oh I would feel fairly certain about
0:49:35that and so that you know that is kind
0:49:38of taken out of it right as time goes on
0:49:40the mayor does not get publicly drunk
0:49:43during sea fair but watching them in old
0:49:49black-and-white photos like watching the
0:49:51town just go nuts and when I got when I
0:49:54was appointed King Neptune my brother
0:49:56Bart sent me a text and he said dad
0:49:59would be so proud oh that's nice
0:50:02dad loved sea fair and this is a you
0:50:05know this is an example of the kind of
0:50:09honorary position in the City of Seattle
0:50:12that my dad thrived on and no member of
0:50:17my family even in all of their many
0:50:21splendors no one ever was King Neptune
0:50:23before my dad and my my uncle al and my
0:50:28uncle Junius and george alfred caldwell
0:50:31rodchester before him none of them ever
0:50:33were afforded or recorded this honor
0:50:38so I don't want to show up in business
0:50:40casual and have a crown I wanted to come
0:50:44dressed as Russell Crowe and Master and
0:50:46Commander hmm but it but you can't take
0:50:49that big Napoleon hat off and put a
0:50:51crown on you just look dumb but you can
0:50:54come as Tsar Nicholas or King George the
0:51:00fifth or a little bit less Kaiser
0:51:04Wilhelm but you can you can come as
0:51:07those guys and it and it it looks it
0:51:12looks the part right because they were
0:51:13obviously like commanders of their
0:51:14navies to you you knew that Tsar
0:51:18Nicholas George the fifth and Kaiser
0:51:21Wilhelm were all first cousins right in
0:51:25thinking about what you were saying I
0:51:26was in my head something was swinging
0:51:28around about Germans there seemed
0:51:31something isn't there a lot of dramatic
0:51:34things running through a lot of
0:51:36different countries like a lot of the
0:51:39royal family has roots in Germany well
0:51:44they're all they're all related right
0:51:46the British royal family is a German
0:51:48house I seem to remember in that in the
0:51:51crown I remember that being kind of kind
0:51:54of a big deal like one of the one of her
0:51:55relatives still mostly spoke German and
0:51:57stuff like that well sure and the thing
0:51:59is the leaders of those three nations at
0:52:02that time 1914 the King of England the
0:52:06George is George v Elizabeth's father
0:52:13grandfather okay right I think
0:52:17yeah all right well they were all so all
0:52:21three of those yes either you're right
0:52:24I'm sorry yeah I think you're right the
0:52:27Kaiser of Prussia the the Czar of Russia
0:52:31and the King of England were all first
0:52:33cousins and they were all grandsons of
0:52:35Queen Victoria Wow
0:52:37and while Queen Victoria was alive they
0:52:42were all like oh and they and they look
0:52:44almost exactly alike like George the
0:52:47fifth and Tsar Nicholas look like twins
0:52:50you see them next to each other twins
0:52:52twins twins and no nobody in the family
0:52:57liked Kaiser Wilhelm he was the cousin
0:53:01that nobody liked how come he was a jerk
0:53:05okay he was like I think that he had
0:53:09when he was being born did there was a
0:53:13complication and one and you know it was
0:53:17it was all olden times so they weren't
0:53:19able to solve complications in being
0:53:22born did like on the spot and one of the
0:53:25results was that the Kaiser was had a
0:53:28deformed arm that it was like Gary
0:53:32Berghof right he he had one hand that he
0:53:36didn't like to show Erbs palsy Gary
0:53:38burghoff had an arm situation Gary
0:53:41burghoff if you I mean in in the ten
0:53:44years that we all watched mash every day
0:53:46we never ever noticed that Gary burghoff
0:53:48has one hand that is I think much
0:53:52smaller than the other I had no oh my
0:53:55god there it is I had no idea and he
0:53:58Gary
0:53:59Birkhoff who is by all accounts a
0:54:01reprehend reprehensible person oh no I'm
0:54:03so sorry you hear that is also a great
0:54:05drummer
0:54:06thank you so much he's a phenomenal
0:54:09drummer but everybody I don't so you
0:54:12weren't around maybe you were your
0:54:15attention was elsewhere you were
0:54:16probably watching Apple announcement
0:54:19events yeah developer conferences but
0:54:23at some point in the early-mid Twitter
0:54:26period
0:54:27Gary Birkhoff appeared on Twitter and he
0:54:29was one of those people that went from
0:54:32having 50 followers to 15,000 followers
0:54:35in two days because he was on Twitter
0:54:38just taking a dump on Alan Alda every
0:54:42day I see and was just he was going he
0:54:45was doing a James Woods he was just
0:54:47going crazy and it was oh I know oh no
0:54:52this is not good it sounds like oh I had
0:54:53some drinks it was the type of thing
0:54:55where Andy Richter was right in there
0:54:59you know like everybody was enjoying
0:55:00gary burghoff
0:55:02imploding online I love a Charlie Sheen
0:55:05I most of all right but but it caused me
0:55:09then to read some oral histories of mash
0:55:11and my favorite quote was somebody I
0:55:15don't know who said Gary Birkhoff was by
0:55:18far the best actor on mash he was doing
0:55:22a genius performance because he was
0:55:25creating a character that was beloved by
0:55:27everyone in the country when he himself
0:55:29was like the most awful man alive and
0:55:34was going up to Charles Nelson Reilly
0:55:36Herve Villechaize no one is spared no
0:55:40you see what's really on Olsen Reilly
0:55:43that's no good well it's like Gary also
0:55:46is is not a not a tall man and yeah
0:55:50thought he was lumped in there but so I
0:55:54think the Kaiser because of his because
0:55:57of his damaged arm had a chip on his
0:55:59shoulder and the Czar and the King
0:56:02looked so much alike and were very
0:56:05chummy like they vacationed together
0:56:07there was a lot of slap and tickle
0:56:08happening and the Kaiser felt left out
0:56:12but they all stayed very they all stayed
0:56:16very you know like pally
0:56:19because all three of them loved Queen
0:56:22Victoria their grandmother and there are
0:56:25all these pictures of them kind of like
0:56:26curled up at her feet while she pets
0:56:29their hair
0:56:30and when she died almost immediately the
0:56:36cousins were like they all squared off
0:56:38and of course they started a world war
0:56:43not that long after mm-hmm
0:56:46where and so the Kaiser and the king and
0:56:49the Czar are fuckin first cousins and
0:56:51they are they're like fighting this
0:56:54enormous conflict where millions died
0:56:58over some stupid shit and halfway
0:57:03through the war the Tsar is deposed by
0:57:07revolution and then at the end of the
0:57:10war the Kaiser loses his crown and there
0:57:16is no there is no monarch of Germany
0:57:18anymore it becomes a whatever funk
0:57:21semi-functional republic and the king of
0:57:23england is the last man standing so I
0:57:28guess really I'm really I'm dressing
0:57:30like King George the fifth I don't want
0:57:32to end up like the Tsar it's gonna be a
0:57:37busy week
0:57:38I have like six events a day oh my
0:57:41goodness that's too many events at six
0:57:43events a day Merlin and Wednesday is
0:57:45supposed to be a hundred and three
0:57:47degrees in Seattle that's a hot day to
0:57:49be the king well I'll see I don't want
0:57:51to wear my tunic on that day I'm gonna
0:57:53that's the day that I'm going business
0:57:54casual mm-hmm I'm going I'm going cruise
0:57:57ship casual on Wednesday this is another
0:58:00nice thing though is that you are I mean
0:58:03obviously you've put a lot of your own
0:58:05special preparation into this particular
0:58:08costume but like you've got a lot of
0:58:11stuff just sitting around that would be
0:58:12appropriate for almost any event like
0:58:14you're you seem like you're pretty good
0:58:16to go yeah as long as no one I I think
0:58:21that I have put myself now finally in a
0:58:24place that I've been that I've been
0:58:27shooting for my whole life which is a
0:58:31place with particularly in in wardrobe
0:58:34terms where whatever the invitation says
0:58:40is the Wardrobe
0:58:41I know that not only can I can I meet
0:58:47their expectations but that I will be
0:58:51able to show up in my own version of a
0:58:53thing like if it sells if it says
0:58:56cocktail formal or it says semi-formal
0:58:59or if it says I mean no one ever doesn't
0:59:01event that says that that says formal
0:59:05and means actual formal like the the
0:59:09nicest event in the country you can show
0:59:12up to an a rented tuxedo anymore but you
0:59:15might say black tie or white tie right I
0:59:17I do not think that you will ever see a
0:59:19thing invite where you are invited white
0:59:21tie I mean unless it's a Royal Wedding
0:59:23which no one's no one listening to this
0:59:26podcast is likely to get invited to
0:59:28least of all me yeah although you never
0:59:31know you never know
0:59:32I mean maybe Boris Johnson is listening
0:59:34to this but other times the dress code
0:59:36they give is a combination of two things
0:59:41on the one hand it's like hey you don't
0:59:45want to look like a ding-a-ling so make
0:59:46sure you dress at least up to this bar
0:59:48but it's also a kind of like a
0:59:50consolation of saying don't worry like
0:59:52you don't have to wear a necktie to this
0:59:54right I think you're trying to give you
0:59:56something to say like to provide comfort
0:59:57ultimately to say like if you're in the
0:59:59range of this
0:59:59range of this
1:00:00kind of garb you'll be fine right and
1:00:02that is antithetical to the idea of
1:00:05having a dress code right I mean that's
1:00:07a that is a modern that's a modern
1:00:09problem to say like here's the dress
1:00:12code don't feel bad
1:00:14you get to where you have to wear it up
1:00:18to this point but don't worry you can it
1:00:21you won't be uncomfortable poor person
1:00:23yeah and after an hour you can take your
1:00:25shoes off
1:00:25yeah and in the past right a dress code
1:00:28was almost almost explicitly like you
1:00:32are going to be incredibly uncomfortable
1:00:34this is not negotiable here is what the
1:00:40expectation is and you will come correct
1:00:43and that's gone from the world unless
1:00:46you're invited to something hosted at
1:00:48the White House or something right like
1:00:49like you go you go to a wedding where
1:00:52the where the people are putting on the
1:00:54wedding and they want everybody to be
1:00:56like really really formal and you see a
1:00:59bunch of guys in blue suits yeah I mean
1:01:01if it doesn't if the if the title of the
1:01:03event you know you look out for words
1:01:05like gala gala is a good indication you
1:01:09should up your game a little bit right
1:01:12but for a lot of people in the world
1:01:15that is a blue suit that's as high as
1:01:16they go blue suit with with the tie the
1:01:18ceiling I've been go any higher than
1:01:20that or a rented tux a mule an
1:01:23ill-fitting rented tux
1:01:25yeah so but but in most cases like
1:01:30formal I think formal involves like
1:01:34actual formal at night is white tie
1:01:40white waistcoat like when was last time
1:01:44you saw that that wasn't at it wasn't a
1:01:47member of a wedding party well and you
1:01:49have to be careful that you don't get in
1:01:50too jokey frat brother Brothers style
1:01:52formality right black black tie is after
1:01:57six is that right
1:01:58well white tie is like the super formal
1:02:01one right right time in olden times
1:02:06white tie was for dinner and black tie
1:02:09was like what you wore
1:02:12like then I mean a morning coat well
1:02:16this is when you white ties when you
1:02:17wear like a Jiminy Cricket outfit yeah
1:02:19at dinner every night I mean this is
1:02:21like this is like old Oh like 1910 and
1:02:24in England but you didn't show up with a
1:02:27Black Tie tuxedo at night at a gala for
1:02:32sure but now you do now that's the
1:02:35that's the peak and there are all kinds
1:02:39of rules right you don't wear a white
1:02:40dinner jacket unless you're in the
1:02:42tropics but people love the look of
1:02:46white dinner jackets and so now you see
1:02:48white dinner jackets above the tropics
1:02:52and also you don't wear a white dinner
1:02:54jacket in the winter hmm but people do
1:02:58now because there's a costume for speed
1:03:00since most people are having fun with it
1:03:02right they don't under they don't know
1:03:04what the they don't know that it
1:03:06actually signifies a Kemp some kind of
1:03:09like archaic social order but so if I'm
1:03:14invited to anything up to white tie
1:03:17which I cannot accomplish like Paul if
1:03:19Tompkins can accomplish white tie and
1:03:20wears it sometimes min wears it always
1:03:24as a costume so he wears it
1:03:26inappropriately in that it's too formal
1:03:28for some events he goes to but that's
1:03:30his bit he's like a he's like a friendly
1:03:31children's television host yeah that is
1:03:34that's his bit huh but almost anything
1:03:37else that you would invite me to I can
1:03:38come not only appropriately but also in
1:03:41my own vernacular right in my own
1:03:45vernacular precisely so you know I can
1:03:48come to a black-tie event in 1959 or in
1:03:521977 or then also the one that is just
1:03:57the appropriate one
1:03:59can I just I read you the description of
1:04:00white tie from the internet science site
1:04:02here according to the British etiquette
1:04:04guide Debrett's of which I do not own a
1:04:08copy the central opponents are
1:04:09components of full evening dress from
1:04:11men are a white Marcella shirt which is
1:04:14a kind of like a weave of shirt Marcella
1:04:17shirt with the detachable wing collar
1:04:19and single cuffs fastened with studs and
1:04:21cufflinks the eponymous white Marcella
1:04:24bowtie is worn around the collar while
1:04:26marcella waistcoat is worn over the
1:04:28shirt over this is worn a black single
1:04:31breasted bar Athiya that's like a very
1:04:33gameofthrones name Bharathi awal or
1:04:36ultrafine herringbone tail coat with
1:04:38silk peak lapels were not done the
1:04:40trousers have double braiding down the
1:04:42outside of both legs while the correct
1:04:44shoes are patent leather or highly
1:04:46polished black dress shoes although a
1:04:48white scarf remains popular in winter
1:04:50the traditional white gloves top hats
1:04:52canes and cloaks are now rare it's the
1:04:56end of the menses yes and so you lose
1:04:58the Canes you lose the Canes and cloak
1:05:02because in cloaks nak seem to like Tori
1:05:07and that's two costumes you look a
1:05:08little bit like you know the monopoly
1:05:10man it was like them enough women but
1:05:13single cuffs not French cuffs like there
1:05:18are a lot of mistakes that we make in
1:05:20thinking that the thing that is more
1:05:22ornate is also the most fancy like
1:05:27you'll see a lot of people a lot of men
1:05:28wear their wingtips to put wingtips with
1:05:33the tux because the wingtips have more
1:05:35fancy on them they are more bling they
1:05:38got more bling but in fact when you get
1:05:40up to this level the fanciest is the
1:05:43plainest so you're not meant to wear
1:05:46wingtips with a with a tuck so you want
1:05:48your plainest black shoes and it should
1:05:51be no except first right yeah that's
1:05:53right
1:05:55and and not French cups but single cuffs
1:05:58and so forth and so on and all this
1:06:00stuff is like that all signals whether
1:06:02or not you know and that's a huge part
1:06:05of what dress codes and what dress even
1:06:08is it signals whether or not you know
1:06:10what things are and now of course we
1:06:14think oh those things are unimportant or
1:06:16those that are worse those things are
1:06:18enforcing a social hierarchy that we
1:06:21abhor but those things are also part of
1:06:28our and this is the word that you know
1:06:30this is the bell ringing word right it's
1:06:32part of our patrimony pound sign not all
1:06:35tuxedos right pound signs you know wears
1:06:38why is it patrimony mm-hmm that's I am
1:06:41but but it's that stuff interests me not
1:06:45just because it's like cultural heritage
1:06:48but also because I love codes you know I
1:06:51love social codes I love in I love
1:06:55interpreting codes I love seeing when
1:06:57other people like Dow Constantine
1:07:00wearing those fucking ribbons is and the
1:07:04converse is expressing a knowledge of
1:07:11ultimately of people and of stories and
1:07:15of the stories that people want to tell
1:07:16and that's what all this stuff is about
1:07:18and I admire it when I see it
1:07:21and honestly I feel like the single
1:07:25piece of scotch tape on the sheriff's
1:07:27gun was a thing that he initially put on
1:07:33there because a screw fell out of his
1:07:34pistol and then he liked what it
1:07:37symbolized he's a man of the people he
1:07:41has a piece of tape on his gun and no
1:07:44one has said anything about it he's been
1:07:46wearing that tape on his gun for fucking
1:07:49ever I bet because looking at the tape
1:07:51it had been on there a long time it was
1:07:52all it was all used and it was put on
1:07:56there very you know not not with any
1:07:59attempt to be neat it was very like slap
1:08:02on some tape he'd been wearing that like
1:08:05a pin on his lapel as a way of signaling
1:08:09so many things and someone finally said
1:08:12something about it and he was thrilled
1:08:14and his deputy was thrilled
1:08:16all these little flags that we have all
1:08:19these flag lapels a flag pins on our
1:08:22lapels that are that are ways of saying
1:08:24like this is me like a sheriff can't
1:08:27bling out his outfit it already is
1:08:29completely composed I'm not sure if Sam
1:08:31you know he doesn't have any there's no
1:08:34opportunity for him to put them even a
1:08:36even a flower in
1:08:37lapel because it would be out of uniform
1:08:39huh but he can put a little tape on the
1:08:41handle of his gun like a like a lace
1:08:46brassiere
1:08:47now at some point do you think you
1:08:50should get that fixed I mean like it's
1:08:54fun he's having fun with it which I like
1:08:56I like that he's doing some bling and
1:08:58he's got his his version of a black
1:09:00brassiere but like damn certain points
1:09:01shouldn't police officer make sure his
1:09:02gun doesn't have tape on it and that's a
1:09:05throwaway piece I think they call it I'm
1:09:07hoping I'm hoping that this Sheriff has
1:09:11enough insulating sheriffs around him he
1:09:15has three or four there were the shit
1:09:17there there are the deputies you see and
1:09:19there that are the deputies you don't
1:09:21see and in Seattle at least in in in
1:09:26Palin around with Dow his driver and his
1:09:30the deputy that is assigned to shadow
1:09:33Dow is always a woman and there and at
1:09:38this event
1:09:39standing sort of back with my crown on
1:09:41that's another fun game is to pick out
1:09:44the people who are there because they
1:09:46are carrying guns because they're
1:09:49shadowing somebody right because a lot
1:09:51of the people at this event have a
1:09:53shadow and the shadow isn't standing at
1:09:56their elbow the shadow is standing in a
1:09:58corner somewhere and they will have an
1:10:01earpiece or they won't but they will
1:10:05definitely have a little twirly cable on
1:10:07it like you're like a Secret Service
1:10:08type situation yeah so there were four
1:10:10of those people at this event but there
1:10:13were also other people that didn't have
1:10:14twirl ease but that had on you know like
1:10:18bulges in their jackets and in King
1:10:23County at least it seems like often the
1:10:30like secret detectives the ones the ones
1:10:36who are standing at one remove are women
1:10:38because I think that the county
1:10:41recognizes that bad guys are there you
1:10:46know the the goal of somebody's standing
1:10:48there with a pistol is that you may not
1:10:50be notice
1:10:51mm-hmm and bad guys are gonna be less
1:10:54likely to think that the sheriff is
1:10:56being shadowed by a deputy who's a woman
1:10:59and that that's an extra layer of
1:11:02badassery that's super badass like Pussy
1:11:06Galore like you have your whole like
1:11:07your squad of action people that's
1:11:11really cool and so when the when the the
1:11:14gang was all finally arrayed on our on
1:11:19our big like parade of Corvettes which
1:11:24is how we were going through the parade
1:11:25and the mayor the the beleaguered mayor
1:11:28of Seattle also arrived and got in his
1:11:31Corvette and I was very interested to
1:11:33know because it's a parade and there's
1:11:36very little separation between you and
1:11:39the crowd in a parade yeah as he started
1:11:41having a rough time well I mean what
1:11:43what he is accused of he will never not
1:11:46have a rough time I mean I know you've
1:11:49been acquainted with him I'm trying to
1:11:50be classy about it but he's he's had
1:11:52kind of some a challenge our current
1:11:55mayor did not run for re-election even
1:11:57though he was until this scandal
1:12:00presumed to be a shoo-in he he bowed out
1:12:04of the race and now there are 21 people
1:12:06running for mayor of Seattle and I
1:12:07should have done it it should have done
1:12:08just film no no please don't even for 22
1:12:11it's done but but so he's in the parade
1:12:13Dow is in a parade they're both riding
1:12:15sort of next to each other in their
1:12:17Corvettes awkward and buff and it's very
1:12:20awkward because Dow is a very successful
1:12:22politician who will be a national
1:12:24politician at one point in his life for
1:12:26sure I mean unless he makes a real
1:12:30misstep which I don't foresee him making
1:12:34but so I walk up in my tunic to their
1:12:39cars to say good luck gentlemen have a
1:12:41great parade on behalf of King Neptune
1:12:43of Seafarer you know have a good time in
1:12:46your parade and as I step to their car
1:12:52you you notice that the secret people
1:12:57the secret deputies I like the secret
1:13:02people I like the secret people they
1:13:04reveal the
1:13:04selves because out of the stout of the
1:13:07scrum of people who are kind of milling
1:13:09around I walk up to these cars fairly
1:13:12quickly because I'm just like mayor good
1:13:16luck have a good race you no doubt good
1:13:18luck have a fun have a fun time I'm just
1:13:21sort of moving quickly to these cars
1:13:23which are which are surrounded with a
1:13:27bubble of nobody in them because again
1:13:30sort of the presumption is like there's
1:13:33a bubble around these people yeah an
1:13:35abundance of caution and so out of the
1:13:38out of the the crowd that's on the
1:13:40periphery I step to these cars and those
1:13:43four people step forward one step and
1:13:46it's not a thing you would notice mm-hmm
1:13:49unless you were conscious of them being
1:13:52there already and knowing that they are
1:13:53all four of them vigilant enough to say
1:13:55who's this fucking guy you move in a
1:13:58move you start you start moving toward
1:13:59didn't Daenerys on on the crown a few
1:14:01people are gonna change positions that's
1:14:02right they all change position to get a
1:14:04little bit better sight line yeah and
1:14:06and they see the mayor
1:14:07you'd recognise me and put out his hand
1:14:09and say hey you know thanks and and who
1:14:14our mare is he's like you know he we'd
1:14:18we don't know each other exactly
1:14:20socially but certainly we know each
1:14:21other and he's like hi great to see
1:14:23thanks for your support he didn't
1:14:25actually say that but no really no
1:14:27that's just in his eyes it's all he
1:14:28knows how to do and then I was like
1:14:31thanks you know and so the the sheriff's
1:14:33take a step forward or the the secret
1:14:35people take a step forward but they know
1:14:36they don't have to take a second step
1:14:37forward because they they see then I'm
1:14:40being acknowledged and recognized and
1:14:42welcome you're good mm-hm
1:14:44if they I think I probably almost
1:14:47certainly that Dow and the mayor both
1:14:49have a a way of posturing themselves
1:14:53which says secret people would you
1:14:56arrive with a quickness you know stiffen
1:15:00up a little bit or something and they
1:15:01know oh it's go time
1:15:02yeah they stiffen up or they look over
1:15:04their shoulder or in some way that
1:15:06recoil mmm-hmm where that where the
1:15:09deputies will arrive on the scene but
1:15:12all of that dance it's so it's just so
1:15:14interesting and so
1:15:18you know what the hierarchy among people
1:15:21with stars on their collars is mmm-hmm
1:15:25there were two Admirals and I wanted to
1:15:28know who reported to the other and so I
1:15:29walked up to one Admiral and I said
1:15:31who's you both that you both have three
1:15:34stars
1:15:35so who's the Kahuna and the guys like
1:15:38what
1:15:39and I'm like well he controls a carrier
1:15:41Strike Group you are commander of
1:15:44Pacific Fleet Operations who gets the
1:15:48bigger slice of cake at the at the
1:15:51reception and the guy that I'm talking
1:15:54to his wife starts to laugh and he said
1:15:57well we're in different we are different
1:16:00where we report to different we both
1:16:02report to the same guy like he doesn't
1:16:04report to me I don't report to him yeah
1:16:05yeah yeah but what's the real story
1:16:07exactly I said yeah okay so he brings
1:16:10his carrier Strike Force into your base
1:16:13if you're mad at him do you get to say
1:16:16like all right well sorry we're out of
1:16:18macaroni and cheese you don't we're not
1:16:20we're not gonna resupply you because of
1:16:23something and his wife is just fuckin
1:16:25cracking up at this point he's like well
1:16:27no first of all I'm not in charge of
1:16:29macaroni and cheese but yeah second and
1:16:39I said so what so it's the military
1:16:42there's no equal no one's equal to
1:16:45anybody that's what makes it the
1:16:47military it's like it's like when you
1:16:48get a pack of dogs yeah you can't write
1:16:50any question you got to know like here's
1:16:52your nose here's this but let's go and
1:16:55so finally he says well he has seniority
1:16:59and I said you mean he enlisted first or
1:17:03he was promoted to Admiral first oh boy
1:17:06you're not gonna let it go are you no no
1:17:08I want to know and his and his wife is
1:17:11is having the best time and he is he may
1:17:16not have thought of this for a long time
1:17:18it's so unconscious in them that he
1:17:22might not have had to break this down
1:17:24but he says both he joined before I did
1:17:27and he was promoted
1:17:30right before I was and I said but
1:17:32doesn't that make you the wunderkind
1:17:35like you are you're younger than him and
1:17:39promoted to the same rank as him and he
1:17:42ran outside agitator john roderick and
1:17:44he shows no he shows no emotion except
1:17:47just the slightest crinkle in his eye
1:17:51just the slightest flash at being
1:17:55complimented and at being recognized as
1:17:58as having made that accomplishment at a
1:18:01younger age
1:18:01mmm-hmm but he said that's not how it
1:18:04works its seniority works according to
1:18:08like age and i said thank you admiral
1:18:13you've Claire you've you know you've
1:18:15clarified things for me today and he the
1:18:17thing is both of these guys are sitting
1:18:18in the backseat of their Corvettes like
1:18:20I'm walking down the lawn okay they
1:18:22can't get away and they're kind of not
1:18:24supposed to say I don't want to talk to
1:18:27you anymore no cuz I'm the fucking King
1:18:29you're the King I have to talk to you
1:18:30and they're both sitting next to their
1:18:32wives which is a different power dynamic
1:18:34it liar hundred percent right I mean
1:18:38like we can all we can all we're doing
1:18:40our little boys thing together our men
1:18:42talking to men thing like you know
1:18:44nobody's gonna Pierce but like they each
1:18:46have their own court jester that
1:18:47actually is running the court yes and
1:18:49they are and the wives are really
1:18:51enjoying this kind of thing right this
1:19:01they're the Admiral except not not at
1:19:04home I'm sure that's true I'm sure
1:19:07that's their long-running gag but I'm
1:19:09also sure probably every single one of
1:19:10them owes their wife so much can you
1:19:13imagine all the bullshit that their
1:19:14family has gone through so that they
1:19:16could have that career all you have to
1:19:18do is watch the right stuff right oh I
1:19:20mean rather we were talking about that
1:19:21just this morning wouldn't know it was
1:19:22Sam Shepard in that yes okay that's why
1:19:24I mention it this morning because I've
1:19:25seen dally
1:19:26she loves Apollo 13 but we've never seen
1:19:29the right stuff and I was like we got to
1:19:31watch that movie it's long it's so good
1:19:33it's really long he played those ladies
1:19:36tough those are tough ladies they are
1:19:39tough and they were tough in in in
1:19:41precisely the era where
1:19:43they were expected to behave a certain
1:19:46way that you know that didn't allow them
1:19:49really to to be assertive publicly
1:19:53assertive it was a bit like like for
1:19:57generations or even millennia like they
1:19:59self-organized not de but any any group
1:20:01like that like self-organized is in the
1:20:04CIA we're like this is you know this is
1:20:06how the village gets things accomplished
1:20:07yeah
1:20:08yes still very related very related
1:20:12structures in like and you put in your
1:20:13anecdote about the the Admirals and the
1:20:16Corvettes you know it's like the part
1:20:19that makes that awkward is that they
1:20:22know the answer to that question
1:20:25I bet I mean they Co they feel it oh
1:20:27yeah I mean they feel it in there you
1:20:29walk into a room and anybody you give
1:20:31any of those guys two drinks and he
1:20:33could force rank that entire room
1:20:34without even thinking about it he could
1:20:36he could fully force rank that room and
1:20:38and I bet you most people in the room
1:20:40could do the exact same thing people
1:20:41given the same amount of information and
1:20:43expertise could go up absolutely top
1:20:45guys I'm Katherine Katherine Oh all the
1:20:47way all the way down the line it's just
1:20:49that it's awkward to talk about it and
1:20:52then how would you if you if they were
1:20:54to say that to you how would they
1:20:56support that in a way that didn't sound
1:20:58like mumbo-jumbo well and there are
1:21:00people who are listening right now who
1:21:02are in the United States Armed Forces
1:21:03and who are officers and who will
1:21:06probably report to us in greater detail
1:21:09but I wonder whether when those two
1:21:11Admirals meet coming through the Rye
1:21:14mm-hmm whether the junior Admiral
1:21:19salutes first because they both know
1:21:24like I'm pretty sure all the three-star
1:21:28all the three stars out there and I
1:21:31think they are lieutenant Admirals or
1:21:33something I don't know exactly which
1:21:35which it is I'm getting yelled at about
1:21:37that but I think they probably all know
1:21:40each other almost certainly they know
1:21:41each other they are there interacting
1:21:43with each other socially and
1:21:45professionally and when they see one
1:21:47another whether the junior one even
1:21:50junior by two days
1:21:54whether they know to salute first I
1:21:57don't know that is a that's a level of
1:21:59military protocol I don't know but but
1:22:02in this little in this little corral
1:22:06that I was in there's the mayor who is
1:22:10used to being the top guy in the city
1:22:12there's the Dow Constantine who is the
1:22:17executive of the county and the county
1:22:19incorporates the city but those two have
1:22:23a relationship that is defined the
1:22:24protocol of that relationship has been
1:22:26defined for decades but still Dow is the
1:22:30more successful of the two politicians
1:22:32the one who will be in office next year
1:22:34Oh interesting so how does that work now
1:22:36the Navy is in town and these guys are
1:22:39high-ranking Navy officers how do they
1:22:41interact with a mayor of a city
1:22:44the sheriff is there he's got four stars
1:22:47on his collar the Admirals only have
1:22:49three but you also know who's the home
1:22:50team right right I think when somebody
1:22:53else is the home team you are dignified
1:22:55but differential right but like sheriff
1:22:59stars and army stars oh yeah right they
1:23:03don't they don't there's definitely
1:23:06there's like a whole like it's like a
1:23:07British Pound type situation like that's
1:23:09that's a different kind of star
1:23:10different kind of stuff mm-hmm and then
1:23:13you waltz and then you plop down in the
1:23:16middle of all of this
1:23:17a rich person so let's say there's a
1:23:21billionaire and let me have an
1:23:22influential person let's say it's Jeff
1:23:25Bezos come to the events so now Jeff
1:23:29Bezos is in the middle so now all
1:23:32picture changes for me
1:23:34he's just cackling maniacally it's just
1:23:36he's there and he's in a hyperbaric
1:23:38chamber that's also a hovercraft
1:23:45[Laughter]