Cortex 66: Triggers - Creating Behaviour That Lasts
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the screws aren't evenly done on my
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soundproofing thing here that's annoying
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I recommend not touching it right now
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please let's not don't want me to touch
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the soundproofing don't we I don't see
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why I shouldn't touch the soundproofing
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stuff oh look just came undone at the
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top see I told you don't touch it I just
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saw the hook undo from the top hold on a
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second that thing only weighs like 300
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pounds if it falls on me it's no problem
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why does it weigh 300 pounds what is it
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it's a it's a mobile recording booth
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panel thing you're supposed to have four
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of them I don't know who thinks this is
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mobile because one guys delivered it you
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have to construct a room inside of your
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office look I'm basically building like
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a little black monolith in which I will
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reside to record the podcasts and I
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don't see what's wrong with that or why
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you would disapprove of that gray it is
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much time merch we have Caltex
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merchandise we have new t-shirts and a
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hoodie for the first time we have a
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whole selection so first time we've done
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this we have four different styles of
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product for you to go and buy gore-tex
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listeners I want to give people a very
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brief rundown of what we've got you can
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go to cortex Murch com2 check out the
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rain I love that URL by the way Mike I
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love that I figure you got you know you
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got it go to make it easy for people I
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realized this in the past it's always
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been like I'll go to here find the link
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no yeah cortex Murch calm that's where
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you go to buy our merchandise boom very
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we are partnering with our friends at
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Cotton Bureau Cotton Bureau make the
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best quality t-shirts that I've ever
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worn they do worldwide shipping they
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have great pricing for Europe and places
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- we have three t-shirts available and a
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hoodie we're for the first time ever we
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are selling merchandise with our logo on
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it a little behind the scenes here
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listeners because Mike is very excited
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about the very exciting t-shirts as I'm
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sure you can hear in his voice he's very
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excited he's been working on this for a
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long time sending me updates images to
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approve that's my job too
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give a little tap back reply thumbs up
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yep on things but mike has been for
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holding back merchandise with the brain
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logo on it I wouldn't say holding back
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holding back is it maybe a harsher term
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just waiting for the right time would be
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what I would say all right all right
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mike has been waiting for the right time
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to new merchandise with the brain and I
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have to agree with him this is the right
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time the stuff he's been sending me
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looks amazing but if you've been
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thinking why don't they sell a t-shirt
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or a hoodie with that amazing brain logo
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on it well today's the day yesterday
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today is your day to buy some brain
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local merchandise we have the original
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which is logos you know it in the nice
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blue color that it has then we have two
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special editions now these two special
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editions this may be the only time we
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ever sell these two one is the core tech
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which is a green brain which is
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glow-in-the-dark I love that and then we
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have cortex over Surrey it was the gold
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logo for our 50th episode and we're
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coming up to like three years doing this
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shows so it's about time that we do this
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so the cortex of ursery is super special
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gold foil the brain the gold foil on the
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t-shirt so you know it's pretty special
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and obviously as you can imagine did she
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show up prices change as you would
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expect them to through that range and
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then we also have I think this might be
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my favorite part we have a hoodie so we
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have a hoodie that you can buy with the
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brain logo on it but it's not printed it
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is embroidered and it looks awesome
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it looks so good I have to say Mike sent
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me the images some of the pre-production
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images of the hoodie and my response was
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give me 10 of those yeah it look really
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cozy I want them I wonder if you can put
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in the show notes the that close-up
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photo that you sent me where you can
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really see the embossed nests of the
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go on that hoodie because I think it
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looks really sweet it looks really great
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for the time being this will be a
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limited run so the hope is that we might
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be able to find a way to sell these
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again in the future hopefully on a more
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permanent basis but for the time being
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all of this much is available for three
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weeks it is available until April the
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10th 2018 so if you want it and trust me
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you do go to cortex much comm check out
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the range and buy everything that you
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like and maybe in the future we might be
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able to sell some of these items but
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I'll tell you the glow-in-the-dark and
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the foil this is the only time you're
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gonna get these so bear that in mind
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yeah those are the limited editions the
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cortex of ursery it doesn't come around
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all the time it doesn't not happened we
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had that episode with the gold and you
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know that was it there won't be another
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cortex episode with the gold logo there
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won't be another cortex of ursery gold
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t-shirt gotta get it now especially you
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only have three weeks to get this stuff
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maybe if you want to look really cool at
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an upcoming conference this summer this
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seems like particularly good stuff to
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get I don't know I don't know if there's
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any conferences or cool events coming up
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this summer but if there were I
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certainly would want to get one of these
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shirts for said cool person conference
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especially you know if me or you or
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maybe at cool person conferences and you
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know I like high-fives so you know there
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are lots of high fives that could be
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given to people wearing the cortex brain
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so cortex merch calm go and buy some
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awesome merchandise yeah just to be
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really clear though grey high fives not
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included with the cortex merchandise no
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I was very careful about that risk
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great high fives cannot be given you
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must check the purchase yeah we have a
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whole little thing so yeah no I don't
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even want to think about travel I have
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no idea what I'm doing but I'm just
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saying summertime conference time you
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want to look cool what could be cooler
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than a glow-in-the-dark
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brain t-shirt I don't know anything or a
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gold one can you imagine a gold foil
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with with the hoodie wanna double up
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come on I mean I feel like you have to
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that's that's a pretty sweet situation
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you're gonna leave the bling master I
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want to talk about one of those events
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in a minute but should we do some yearly
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theme updates okay so I've been I've not
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decided where my journal fits into my
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yearly theme yeah I know it's in one of
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them I just haven't worked out which one
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can you remind the listeners and me in
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this moment what your two themes are I
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feel like because you went with two I
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can't remember either of them they flown
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right out of my head the year of
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adulting okay write your adulting and
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the year of branching out your branching
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out I feel like the journal is much more
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branching out than year of adulting the
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year of adulting is very is like for
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some very specific events right like
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that but they overruled the big theme
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for me this year is the year of
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branching out and and this is one of
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those things in a way cuz it is a little
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bit different and it's a little bit
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►
outside of my usual comfort zone to like
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sit and write a journal every day but
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I've been doing it every day I don't do
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what weekend's is what I've come to the
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to it's just a thing that I don't really
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feel like I need to because as well a
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lot of what goes in my journal is very
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work focused so I tend not to write in
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it on the weekends unless I'm having a
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working day on the weekend so but yeah
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I've been keeping it up I added in one
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of your suggestions after the last
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episode of the what's on my mind
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heading oh yeah yeah and I found that to
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be really helpful because sometimes I
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want to write some stuff down that
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doesn't fit in like something good
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something bad or priorities or something
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like that and and a lot of the time it
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is just how I'm feeling and that has
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been a nice addition which I don't use
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every day but it's good to have it there
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when I want it mmm somebody that's
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working for you so it's still like I'm
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still very impressed with your now that
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we're like how long have you been doing
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this town must be what a month is that
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about right since you started I can tell
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you actually cuz I wrote the date down
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I've been doing this since 2004 February
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yeah okay so yeah it's just about a
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month I'm very impressed with that
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because you know when we discussed
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journaling you know and it got a little
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got a little like touchy-feely last
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episode you know sorry about that by the
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yeah I don't know how that happens this
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this is one of those say that to tell
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you right every now and then just like
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you record something and it's done and
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like you put it out there and that's it
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but sometimes you get people reaching
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out I had some friends like you okay all
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right fine no fine or like I've had
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people ask me things and then they're
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like I'm sorry to give you more work no
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no we're good we're good oh yeah yeah
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it's like that time I put out a video
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about death I got a lot of messages from
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people in it like are you okay that's
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fine like if I ever put out a video
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about death again people you don't need
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to send me messages about like are you
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okay right it's just it's just an
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interesting topic yeah but I could see
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that on on show you start to have met
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your feelings people like oh god are you
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you on the edge alright I kind of break
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down Mike if you went okay yeah so yeah
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I got a bit emotional but no it's all
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good I'm pleased I'm enjoying it and I
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may be thinking about doing some
◼
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different stuff in it after having read
◼
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triggers which we're going to talk about
◼
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today but I haven't yet worked out how I
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would maybe add these things in so that
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my that's one of the things that I want
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to go over when we talk about the book
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in a little bit mmm can I get your
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thoughts on it especially because I know
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that influenced your stuff when you do
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any journaling so it was the case that
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after the last episode I was thinking oh
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I should really I should really make a
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real effort about trying to do the
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journaling again and then I immediately
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used the homework that I had assigned
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►
ourselves about reading that book as an
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excuse to not do it like well I can't do
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►
it until I've reread this book and I
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finished my reread of the book this
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morning so I think my I have not I have
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►
not done any journaling since the last
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►
episode again I find this a really hard
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►
habit to keep up outside so that's why
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I'm doubly impressed with your ability
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to do that so I think I think that's but
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I think it's good I think that's a good
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►
addition to the year of the year
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branching out it will
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we'll help you explore your ideas about
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►
branching out like what what are you
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gonna do what does that mean for this
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►
upcoming year year of adulting that's
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kind of a thing that the external world
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just supposes upon you yeah exactly as I
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hear carry this Boulder this Boulder
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labeled being an adult but year of
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branching out that's you looking towards
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the horizon figuring out which way are
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you in the boulder going to go I'm gonna
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wish you wouldn't describe it that way
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you don't like the mental pictures that
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I paint Mike you didn't like my forest
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fire last time although I'm still
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absolutely convinced that was the proper
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metaphor I don't know if you saw but
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people were sending you pictures of of
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what like forest fires look like when
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they're making a forest nice and clean
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by getting rid of all the underbrush did
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you find any of these actual images of
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forests burning down helpful in
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understanding the visual picture that I
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was trying to paint no it just it just
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reinforced my original think feeling or
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why this shouldn't be the metaphor that
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we use mmm no I I think it's great and I
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think you should also just think of the
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year of adulting is like a boulder that
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is being harnessed to your back that you
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carry around not a thing that you choose
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but a thing that is added onto you and
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then the year of branching out is you
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deciding where to walk with the boulder
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oh so like I put the boulder on top of
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the hill and then like drag it around
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yeah you haven't chosen it it gets
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attached to you that's what happens
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that's your effort salting and then
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you're branching out is where am I gonna
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go now that I have this attached to me
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that's that's how I if I were you that's
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how I would like to think about it that
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sounds very encouraging keep that in
◼
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mind I think that's a healthy mental
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picture you want me to talk about what
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another thing I'm doing to branch out is
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that what you want me to do yeah that's
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right that's where I'm leading so where
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are you in the boulder going this year
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►
Mike so WWDC is coming this is Apple's
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►
conference where they're now sort of
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►
their stuff for the next year mm-hmm
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►
it's happening in San Jose again from
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►
the 4th to the 8th of June and we're
◼
►
doing a live show so last year we did
◼
►
not do a live show because we moved
◼
►
place but there is going to be a relay
◼
►
FM live show at WWDC on Wednesday June
◼
►
this is branching out because there is
◼
►
an audience of 900 people available in
◼
►
the room the biggest live show that I've
◼
►
ever done had 230 people so 900 is a is
◼
►
a is a step to make there's quite an
◼
►
increase it is quite an increase but I'm
◼
►
very excited about it
◼
►
so you can go and get tickets we're
◼
►
doing this in partnership with a
◼
►
conference called ort Kampf which is
◼
►
happening next door to where Apple holds
◼
►
their conference I'll put links in the
◼
►
show notes but you can go to or can't
◼
►
calm and they have tickets there for
◼
►
real AFM live on June the 6th you should
◼
►
come see us if you're gonna be in town
◼
►
it's gonna be a gritty good show we're
◼
►
planning out some fun stuff to do and
◼
►
yeah I'm really excited about it yeah
◼
►
just to be clear you don't have to be a
◼
►
developer who's gotten a ticket to go to
◼
►
WWC to be part of alt conf that's the
◼
►
whole as the whole point point of all of
◼
►
all calm yep all right is that it's next
◼
►
door it's the alternative conference and
◼
►
it's free yeah if like me you are not a
◼
►
developer you're not one of these gods
◼
►
who makes the apps for us you can go to
◼
►
Kampf and it's cool you check out things
◼
►
that are going on there and yep really
◼
►
live show old conf tickets for our live
◼
►
show of five dollars and all of that
◼
►
money goes towards supporting what all
◼
►
does providing free content people that
◼
►
are gonna be in town so if you want to
◼
►
come and see a great night of podcast
◼
►
fun get on over to relay of home live on
◼
►
June the 6th so it's gonna be awesome
◼
►
and go get tickets at op conf calm to
◼
►
see the relay FM live show this episode
◼
►
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if I need to go to an occasion if we
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show and real afm how is the year of
◼
►
order got going sorry I had something my
◼
►
throat there is it going okay you sound
◼
►
ridiculous when you do that yeah of
◼
►
course nobody says order like that
◼
►
why would you yeah why would you that's
◼
►
yeah so year of order year of order is
◼
►
is going well but there's a thing I feel
◼
►
like I want to get it on the record now
◼
►
just to put this to put this at the
◼
►
beginning I have a very strong feeling
◼
►
that this is going to be much more like
◼
►
the years of order like I think I have a
◼
►
feeling this is a theme that is not
◼
►
going to be done it is a regime it's
◼
►
like the regime of order like that I
◼
►
don't have any specifics that I want to
◼
►
really talk about on on the show but I
◼
►
could just say like it's a thing that
◼
►
I'm being very deliberate and also very
◼
►
slow about like I'm trying not to rush a
◼
►
bunch of things and also making it too
◼
►
bit later but there's there are some
◼
►
things where I feel like the year of
◼
►
redirection slash chaos didn't really
◼
►
end until like mid-february there were
◼
►
some projects that kind of lingered over
◼
►
and just being very delivered with it
◼
►
but I want to get it on the record now
◼
►
because future me might look like he
◼
►
just couldn't think of a new theme for
◼
►
the year when we have our next
◼
►
discussion about like what are the
◼
►
themes for the year I want it I want to
◼
►
current me to save him and get it on the
◼
►
record that if that guy thinks it's we
◼
►
just need to have another year of order
◼
►
to lead into the regime of order that he
◼
►
was already thinking about it way back
◼
►
at the beginning of the year it just
◼
►
this feels like the more I think about
◼
►
it and the more I do it just feels like
◼
►
a much bigger thing than actually a a
◼
►
single year because I really do feel
◼
►
like this is touching on lots of
◼
►
different aspects of my life so I feel
◼
►
like this may be the years of order that
◼
►
that's that might be I might be able to
◼
►
help you here I've opened up the fuss
◼
►
what about the year of procedure or the
◼
►
year of structure the era of
◼
►
codification you could just keep doing
◼
►
that right so it's like it's the same
◼
►
thing but you give it a different name
◼
►
every year no that's dumb that's done a
◼
►
year of symmetry that doesn't even make
◼
►
no that doesn't even make any sense
◼
►
there Mike ooh year of hominid I like
◼
►
that one I could do some fun things took
◼
►
about that you have harmony though that
◼
►
feels like a very different kind of year
◼
►
than the year of order your year of
◼
►
order is that is not the same as harmony
◼
►
your thesaurus is broken and it needs to
◼
►
be better at the solarizing but no I
◼
►
just I'm not gonna I'm not going to try
◼
►
to pull one over on the audience by
◼
►
giving the same thing a different name I
◼
►
just I just wanted to get on the record
◼
►
and this is also again well hi I like to
◼
►
speak in terms of like seasons and even
◼
►
this idea of like the year of order like
◼
►
but when did when does the years start
◼
►
like who knows whenever uh years to me
◼
►
they can be two years they can be one
◼
►
year who knows but I just have a feeling
◼
►
like this is going to be a much a much
◼
►
larger project and I want to get it on
◼
►
record now for future me but that's
◼
►
that's it's gonna happen
◼
►
also I don't really have any specific
◼
►
thoughts about this but I can already
◼
►
see what is going to be the first really
◼
►
major obstacle towards the year of order
◼
►
which is yesterday I was finishing up my
◼
►
travel schedule for the next couple
◼
►
months and you know how we've discussed
◼
►
you have that feeling of overwhelming
◼
►
Ness I I definitely I was looking at the
◼
►
things that I have booked myself for for
◼
►
the next several months and I just
◼
►
thought oh god like I got that real
◼
►
tightness in much and I had this feeling
◼
►
of like like travel sick without even
◼
►
going this is so all good for me because
◼
►
I'm I feel I'm I'm so sorry I feel like
◼
►
I'm to blame for all of this anybody
◼
►
here's the thing Mike you're not to
◼
►
blame for all of this you are but a part
◼
►
of this right of course you are part of
◼
►
it but not remotely all of it but but it
◼
►
was it was just a funny thing to be
◼
►
looking at the travel schedule and like
◼
►
oh my god and and recognizing that this
◼
►
was really one of the things that that
◼
►
started me thinking about the year of
◼
►
order was doing all the travel last year
◼
►
and feeling like I would through my life
◼
►
into chaos and so I have I'm just aware
◼
►
of trying to think about this in advance
◼
►
and I've been thinking about some
◼
►
strategies that I'm just toying with
◼
►
right now about how to try to maintain
◼
►
order in my life throughout a chaotic
◼
►
schedule but when I was running over the
◼
►
dates and plans and things with my
◼
►
had an idea which was the idea that made
◼
►
me feel sick because I thought oh she's
◼
►
not wrong but her suggestion was well
◼
►
why don't you just fly to America in
◼
►
April and not come back until the end of
◼
►
Oh actually it's not that crazy it's a
◼
►
crazy idea it is it might make sense in
◼
►
your situation doesn't mean it's less
◼
►
crazy it's a crazy that is wild because
◼
►
like at that point like if you look like
◼
►
you have a special situation but if you
◼
►
were me I could be pushing up against
◼
►
visa regulations I have a question for
◼
►
you on this right yeah because you are a
◼
►
man who cannot be made to do things
◼
►
right like if you don't want to do
◼
►
something you won't do it and and it
◼
►
kind of doesn't matter what it is like
◼
►
if you don't want to do it you won't do
◼
►
it like people cannot pressure you into
◼
►
doing things because you're very
◼
►
strong-willed like that so considering
◼
►
you know how much of a stress this
◼
►
travel might be to you why are you doing
◼
►
it all I mean why do we do anything like
◼
►
because then that's not you do a thing
◼
►
because it makes sense to do and this is
◼
►
one thing this is one of the cases where
◼
►
I don't want to get into into too many
◼
►
of the particulars right now because
◼
►
it's like it's just like a long story
◼
►
but part part of it just is that at this
◼
►
stage in my life it makes way more sense
◼
►
and there's way more reasons to do
◼
►
traveling than there was before and and
◼
►
that's why I feel like I'm willing to
◼
►
suck up a bunch of jetlag and disruption
◼
►
to my calendar and once um once I'm able
◼
►
to make that decision I always feel like
◼
►
if I'm traveling if I'm going like I'm
◼
►
going to be flying to America anyway I
◼
►
might as well try to double or triple up
◼
►
on what the trip actually is so there's
◼
►
another there's a number of times where
◼
►
it's like oh I'm flying into America for
◼
►
I don't know maybe a thing on the west
◼
►
coast and then then immediately I start
◼
►
thinking about like well is there
◼
►
something I can do on the East Coast on
◼
►
my way in and also on the East Coast on
◼
►
my way out and then I start planning
◼
►
things like that so there are ways in
◼
►
which I am sort of the the source of my
◼
►
own problem but I don't I don't view it
◼
►
as a problem I view it as like if I'm
◼
►
going to go through this anyway how can
◼
►
I try to maximize this time either in
◼
►
like a business way or either in a
◼
►
family or a personal way so that that's
◼
►
partly why my travel schedule does look
◼
►
a little crazy is I'm also taking things
◼
►
and expanding them a little bit in
◼
►
either direction to say like if I'm
◼
►
going to be there anyway what's nearby
◼
►
or can I combine this with another trip
◼
►
so that's why trips to America very
◼
►
quickly become at least two trips to
◼
►
America for me yes yeah I'm still
◼
►
interested to see how this plays out
◼
►
though because that amount of travel was
◼
►
part of a big contributing factor to
◼
►
what made last year a year of chaos yep
◼
►
but now you're doing basically the same
◼
►
amount of travel but claiming it's gonna
◼
►
be in order so I'm gonna no no no II
◼
►
need to see where that goes just to be
◼
►
clear here I'm not claiming it's going
◼
►
to be an order oh I do Monde I would
◼
►
demand but this is a situation where you
◼
►
can't you can't make demands of your
◼
►
future self because that guy doesn't
◼
►
listen I'm not saying that it's going to
◼
►
be order 'fl I fully expect there's
◼
►
going to be a lot of stumbling over the
◼
►
year of order during a summer of busy
◼
►
travel but I'm just because I'm thinking
◼
►
of the benefit of the year themes it's
◼
►
like what do I want this year to be like
◼
►
I wanted to be more order Philander then
◼
►
it naturally starts me thinking ideas
◼
►
about if I am going to be traveling and
◼
►
I know from experience that it was kind
◼
►
of a chaotic disaster last year
◼
►
what can I try to do to minimize that
◼
►
while I'm traveling so that that's all I
◼
►
can I have some ideas about ways I could
◼
►
try to make it better but I know it's
◼
►
there's there's the ideal of how I would
◼
►
want the travel to go and there's the
◼
►
reality of how it actually will go but
◼
►
maybe there are some strategies I can
◼
►
try to implement to at least make it
◼
►
more like the way I want it to be than
◼
►
I think we've got some really
◼
►
interesting themes going on this yeah I
◼
►
think it's clear in the fact that we
◼
►
keep talking about them mmm there is
◼
►
like the two main things that we have
◼
►
going on they seem to be moving way more
◼
►
than last year's themes you know like
◼
►
there seems to be more kind of like
◼
►
ongoing development with them it's
◼
►
interesting I think we've both really I
◼
►
mean I know I have at least that really
◼
►
latched on to my same idea yeah this
◼
►
year because it's branching out could
◼
►
mean so many things so and maybe putting
◼
►
too much on myself because I want to
◼
►
keep like going by the theme but I will
◼
►
say that right now it is pretty exciting
◼
►
yeah I think it is I feel like we both
◼
►
have particularly good useful themes
◼
►
this year from some of our our private
◼
►
discussions as well I feel like they are
◼
►
particularly relevant themes related to
◼
►
like what has happened in the past year
◼
►
and what we expect to happen in the
◼
►
upcoming year like I think that they are
◼
►
good they are good themes and it's nice
◼
►
to have the theme to to orient your life
◼
►
and your and your mind around to just
◼
►
like keep focused on this idea as
◼
►
opposed to goals which as we all know
◼
►
goals are dumb gray I want to return to
◼
►
the real kind of tempo item in the
◼
►
history of our show email I want to talk
◼
►
about email a little bit oh the wheel
◼
►
uh-huh yeah because I hate email apps
◼
►
again Oh Mike so you're going through
◼
►
email what I went through with task
◼
►
managers yep I hate email well I'm
◼
►
coming surrett with task managers as
◼
►
well I did a couple of days ago I kind
◼
►
of looked up my iPad and I was like I'm
◼
►
not happy with anything all systems that
◼
►
I have I am unhappy with all of them I
◼
►
don't know why this is going on I have
◼
►
this very clear mental image of you like
◼
►
a little child just with your arms
◼
►
crossed and frowning and your iPad like
◼
►
none of this is good don't wipe my
◼
►
finger at it let's go what's going on
◼
►
with your email because you've been
◼
►
using what I've used for a long time
◼
►
despite its many problems right you have
◼
►
always been very upfront about that Mao
◼
►
and there are two problems that I have
◼
►
one has been persistent which has been
◼
►
nagging away at me in that when I have
◼
►
an email application and I send an email
◼
►
what I don't want my email app to do is
◼
►
to completely lock up which is what it
◼
►
does yeah that's that that would seem
◼
►
bad yes so every time I send an email
◼
►
with airmail the app completely freezes
◼
►
for a period of time well it's busy
◼
►
sending the email that's what I guess it
◼
►
is so like I'd send an email and then if
◼
►
I open another application into split
◼
►
view was the emails sending everything
◼
►
crashes and sometimes I just leave it
◼
►
there and the app will just crash I what
◼
►
I will say for email is they have a no
◼
►
error rate of like not sending their
◼
►
email so like if the app crashes they
◼
►
will always send it when the app is
◼
►
opened again but I still just I get
◼
►
frustrated every time I use my email
◼
►
application to send an email and my
◼
►
email application becomes unresponsive
◼
►
it just feels like something that
◼
►
shouldn't be happening and yeah this has
◼
►
been annoyingly concerning yeah is
◼
►
concerning and then a couple of days ago
◼
►
I open air mail and it sent every email
◼
►
in my inbox to the archive okay I don't
◼
►
know why it did it I couldn't stop it
◼
►
and that was just the situation that I
◼
►
was in okay I just need to pause here
◼
►
for a little bit of clarification
◼
►
because my understanding of your system
◼
►
is that you only ever have like seven
◼
►
emails in your inbox right yep so it's
◼
►
not was for other people this this is a
◼
►
huge disaster for you isn't obviously no
◼
►
but so you're losing like seven to ten
◼
►
messages rather here's the problem oh I
◼
►
know what the problem is I just wanted
◼
►
to clarify I think you know I trust me
◼
►
I'm not like you just lost seven
◼
►
messages no no I understand
◼
►
these are messages that require a
◼
►
response yep they're all they're the
◼
►
most important emails the most important
◼
►
over a period of time which is not
◼
►
linear right so when they are gone they
◼
►
they're just gone mm-hmm right like
◼
►
and I had to reconstruct them from
◼
►
memory as to what was what I thought was
◼
►
in my inbox so this is one of those this
◼
►
is the worst kind of for me like data
◼
►
loss type problem yeah when you know
◼
►
something's gone but you don't know what
◼
►
it was yeah I 100% agree that is
◼
►
definitely the worst kind of data loss
◼
►
problem the that's like a known unknown
◼
►
like you know for sure there were seven
◼
►
to ten exactly how many did I get all of
◼
►
them did I forget one now now you just
◼
►
live in a cloud of uncertainty and and
◼
►
also that is the kind of thing that that
◼
►
for me when an app does that kind of
◼
►
thing you suddenly feel like I can't
◼
►
trust you to do any yeah I don't trust
◼
►
it doesn't matter if it's been working
◼
►
perfectly for a year that kind of error
◼
►
is the like nope I'm gone hey I need to
◼
►
just stay like I am on the beta of a
◼
►
male right look I am on a beta version
◼
►
but some of the problems that it has
◼
►
basically all of the problems that it
◼
►
has still exists in the stable version
◼
►
maybe if I was on a regular version it
◼
►
wouldn't work I'd ever archived
◼
►
everything but honestly that was just
◼
►
the straw that broke the camel's back
◼
►
right like I was already getting more
◼
►
and more frustrated with it and the
◼
►
reason I've never switched from airmail
◼
►
is because I have never found found any
◼
►
email application that works for me as
◼
►
good as that one does from like how my
◼
►
system works so I've been trying to
◼
►
think like what do I need from an email
◼
►
application so I have a few things I
◼
►
want to list right I need a unified
◼
►
inbox for multiple services not just
◼
►
Gmail it has to have great iOS apps
◼
►
which include things like drag and drop
◼
►
on the iPad or even split view there's
◼
►
an app called Edison mail that I was
◼
►
thought was really nice but they broke
◼
►
something and now it won't do split view
◼
►
and they're not 100% sure when that's
◼
►
coming back to the application what that
◼
►
means I can't use it because now I don't
◼
►
trust them either right yeah but I would
◼
►
be like Oh Mike you can live without
◼
►
drag and drop if it split view forget it
◼
►
yeah drag and drop I can live without
◼
►
even though it's like it's really
◼
►
important to me if like if it was the
◼
►
only feature that an app didn't have I
◼
►
would get used to it but I can't have an
◼
►
email application that doesn't work and
◼
►
split on my iPad because that's how I
◼
►
use email application
◼
►
email application has to be next to
◼
►
Safari otherwise it's 25% as useful
◼
►
ideally it would have a Mac app but if
◼
►
it didn't it would play nicely with
◼
►
other applications like I don't want an
◼
►
email after that like takes all of my
◼
►
email and does something to it right
◼
►
like I don't want that asking for the
◼
►
mac app has already set the bar quite
◼
►
high mm-hmm as long as it plays nicely
◼
►
with a male or male on the Mac I'm fine
◼
►
right like that will do for me yeah and
◼
►
by play nicely you mean it it's not
◼
►
making special custom folders exact
◼
►
whatever it does but yeah I I agree at
◼
►
some point I did try a couple email
◼
►
clients that did that kind of thing and
◼
►
I'm immediately like no no no no you
◼
►
don't mess with the folder structure of
◼
►
my email like I don't care how good of
◼
►
an app you are like you're gonna you're
◼
►
gonna use straight-up IMAP with my
◼
►
folders and you're gonna like it like
◼
►
that that's what's gonna happen email
◼
►
app no none of these special folders and
◼
►
moving things around because that also
◼
►
feels like it's like the Evernote
◼
►
problem like how do I ever get out of
◼
►
this system right like I'm gonna need to
◼
►
move at some point so yeah that's a
◼
►
total deal-breaker yep so we'll say I do
◼
►
use sandbox right now which does some of
◼
►
this stuff we're like filtering into
◼
►
folders but sandbox can in theory work
◼
►
of any applications what it's doing is
◼
►
applying Gmail labels to things right so
◼
►
I like that it works for me but that
◼
►
using sandbox has introduced enough a
◼
►
requirement for an email application
◼
►
that there has to be quick and easy
◼
►
access to labels or folders however it
◼
►
calls them and in a sidebar which is
◼
►
customizable so I've used a bunch of
◼
►
apps which shows me every folder every
◼
►
label that's no good because I only ever
◼
►
want to see two of them I don't need
◼
►
rest and so there are some apps that
◼
►
will do this some that won't any push
◼
►
notifications and a big one for me is a
◼
►
clear business model if I am gonna start
◼
►
using an email application I want to be
◼
►
confident it's gonna be around next week
◼
►
and if there is no I don't care what the
◼
►
business model is to a point I just need
◼
►
to be able to trace where the money's
◼
►
coming from if I can't do that I don't
◼
►
want to use it I don't you just want it
◼
►
to be free though mic isn't free great
◼
►
no I I mean I don't care I mean so like
◼
►
I will pay I have no problem paying I'll
◼
►
pay a subscription I have no problem
◼
►
and I don't care if it's free if it
◼
►
makes sense right so like Microsoft
◼
►
Outlook I know why that's free mmm oh
◼
►
that's a good comparison yeah that's
◼
►
that's a really good thing that is a
◼
►
free app that I could feel good about
◼
►
too with most free apps I feel like oh
◼
►
this is garbage because what they want
◼
►
me to do is become an office 365
◼
►
customer like that's the business model
◼
►
right get me into the Microsoft
◼
►
ecosystem like I'm fine with that
◼
►
or like Gmail on fire Gmail being free
◼
►
like I'm good with it as long as there's
◼
►
a reason for it if it's just like hey
◼
►
we're a start-up in our email apps free
◼
►
it's like yeah but where's the money
◼
►
because businesses need that and so you
◼
►
know and there are things right that I'm
◼
►
willing to accept so like Gmail being
◼
►
free I know it's because they use it to
◼
►
serve ads to me and I'm fine with that
◼
►
so I just something you know I'm I need
◼
►
to know where the money's coming from so
◼
►
I'm out in the email app woodenness once
◼
►
again nothing is making me happy right
◼
►
now to move away from email but I also
◼
►
don't want to be on air mail so I don't
◼
►
know expect to hear more from me about
◼
►
this but I'm out in the wilderness and
◼
►
everyone's gonna have suggestions and I
◼
►
appreciate them like if you think you
◼
►
have an app that conserves can give me
◼
►
what I'm looking for like I want to know
◼
►
in the reddit but my cursory searching
◼
►
has told me that nothing nothing exists
◼
►
I assume that Gmail is free because the
◼
►
business model is actually there's an AI
◼
►
that is slowly improving itself and it
◼
►
just needs access to more and more data
◼
►
yes that's what the actual business
◼
►
model it's it's like oh the computer
◼
►
sent it and it wants to know everything
◼
►
about humans that's why Gmail is free as
◼
►
a business model you know this clear are
◼
►
you sending AI looking to take over the
◼
►
world that's good at least I know what
◼
►
you're doing not some flock by night
◼
►
startup I can accept it right like the
◼
►
AI needs it needs its brain juice you
◼
►
know anyway it's gonna get it I suppose
◼
►
that's a long list Mike I wish you I
◼
►
wish you the best of luck with this but
◼
►
all I can ever think when I look at
◼
►
lists like this is just this fact of
◼
►
life that with anything if you're trying
◼
►
to make a decision or you're trying to
◼
►
find something do you have one
◼
►
you're probably going to be pretty happy
◼
►
do you have two requirements you can
◼
►
probably find something to with two
◼
►
requirements that's too like a market
◼
►
the instant you get to three or more
◼
►
requirements I'm astounded about the
◼
►
like the nonlinear descent of options
◼
►
that if you're looking for something
◼
►
that has three or four things it's like
◼
►
your options decrease to nothing almost
◼
►
immediately yeah so I'm looking at this
◼
►
I'm looking at Mike has six bullet
◼
►
points it's like no the universe is not
◼
►
large enough that anywhere has sentient
◼
►
life created an app that would meet all
◼
►
of these requirements for you like I
◼
►
think I think that's the situation I'm
◼
►
willing to bend some of these I don't
◼
►
know which ones right I think it depends
◼
►
on what the application can do for me
◼
►
because there are always changes I can
◼
►
make to my system like my requirements
◼
►
right now are built upon what I've
◼
►
learned in using airmail for multiple
◼
►
years right so honestly the application
◼
►
that does the most of these is email and
◼
►
but the plan is to try and move away
◼
►
from airmail so I will make compromise
◼
►
but I don't know what those compromises
◼
►
will be yet right right right
◼
►
okay because I need to find an
◼
►
application where I'm like okay I like
◼
►
this app it doesn't do this one thing
◼
►
but I'm willing to look past that now
◼
►
Edison was the closest that kind of did
◼
►
a lot of it but it's failing point might
◼
►
be the most important which is has to
◼
►
feel like a really good iPad app because
◼
►
that's where I'm doing the vast majority
◼
►
of my email so you know maybe I'll look
◼
►
at it again but I'm not so sure like a
◼
►
good app but if you do something to your
◼
►
application that breaks split view and
◼
►
you're not sure how long it's gonna take
◼
►
to fix it but you a warning for me right
◼
►
like it will this happen again so I'm
◼
►
out in the wilderness that's where I
◼
►
feel like I'm at right now like just
◼
►
there's envelopes and paper planes all
◼
►
around my iPad right and I just have two
◼
►
rows of icons that are paper planes or
◼
►
envelopes email is neither of those
◼
►
there is no paper involved in email
◼
►
but the paper this is like the icon of
◼
►
the paper plane has just so become an
◼
►
email to me I'm like what do you mean
◼
►
the paper plane is an email obviously
◼
►
that's email you send it off with a
◼
►
little with a little cute animation
◼
►
where it swirls over as it goes like
◼
►
this is how like we end up with a floppy
◼
►
disk icon of save yeah of course right
◼
►
and that we're in this world now where
◼
►
people don't actually send letters
◼
►
anymore they send emails that's how
◼
►
you'd communicate with each other but
◼
►
now emails is some email is somehow
◼
►
synonymous for paper from it from a
◼
►
design perspective right it doesn't make
◼
►
so like I wonder the thing that replaces
◼
►
email like what will its icon be right
◼
►
like what will the eventual icon for
◼
►
email be and then we're just gonna keep
◼
►
going down that roof forever but as I
◼
►
was thinking a lot about email it
◼
►
brought me back to something that you
◼
►
had mentioned last episode that you were
◼
►
gonna try and do something about your
◼
►
email backlog and you'd mentioned you
◼
►
hadn't opened email for months so my
◼
►
thought was kind of like is it even
◼
►
worth it like how do you go through that
◼
►
like is it even worth going through it
◼
►
or surely all of the questions asked
◼
►
have been answered by the fact that you
◼
►
never replied so like isn't it worth
◼
►
just like command a and archive this
◼
►
episode of cortex is brought to you by
◼
►
simple contacts it's pretty great when
◼
►
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for their support of this show okay I
◼
►
got a lot I got a lot of comments from
◼
►
the last show people like hey dude have
◼
►
you heard of email bankruptcy mmhmm yeah
◼
►
I've heard of email bankruptcy I think
◼
►
maybe for some people that can work but
◼
►
that that would not work for me I will
◼
►
say personally I think email bankruptcy
◼
►
is a terrible idea and basically every
◼
►
situation I just don't think that's the
◼
►
right way I don't know what the right
◼
►
way is to deal with 20,000 emails but I
◼
►
think it's it's it's not good because I
◼
►
think what feel like if you've done that
◼
►
once you'll be doing it forever yeah I
◼
►
don't know like I can see situations
◼
►
where it makes sense like I think of I
◼
►
mentioned before but like when I used to
◼
►
be a teacher and I'd you know be away
◼
►
for being sick or something and come
◼
►
back and they were just like thousands
◼
►
of emails in my inbox and and that to me
◼
►
was like hey you're all all of this is
◼
►
going away and it struck me as I think
◼
►
the optimal case for email bankruptcy
◼
►
which is important things will come back
◼
►
and that was my experience that like in
◼
►
a working environment email bankruptcy
◼
►
is many ways much easier to do yeah I
◼
►
mean I used to do an element of this at
◼
►
the bank but not all of it though and
◼
►
like and I would look at it right yeah I
◼
►
don't think that it's a totally useless
◼
►
idea I just I feel like I don't know
◼
►
maybe you need to be as I was a very
◼
►
if you're going to properly implement
◼
►
the email Bank like you need to be at
◼
►
just the right position and you need to
◼
►
be able to have the expectation that
◼
►
other people will put in the effort to
◼
►
reach you about whatever it is that you
◼
►
need but so the reason that I'm not
◼
►
doing it now is a couple of folds
◼
►
one of one of the things is I know that
◼
►
I will just never sleep well at night if
◼
►
I just archive a year's worth of emails
◼
►
and never look at them I will not get
◼
►
the feeling that I want to get which is
◼
►
I have successfully dealt with this
◼
►
thing that I've avoided for a really
◼
►
long time because if I just archive it I
◼
►
will forever wonder about like is the
◼
►
taxman gonna show up at my door with the
◼
►
policeman because I forgot to fill out
◼
►
some form that some accountants sent to
◼
►
me ages ago right or like is there just
◼
►
something important in there that I
◼
►
missed like I just I would not get the
◼
►
sense of relief yeah cuz a lot of those
◼
►
things that are super risky those people
◼
►
won't care enough to contact you again
◼
►
like it's on you that's exactly it right
◼
►
and this is again the difference about
◼
►
like the school scenario where email
◼
►
bankruptcy is possible is being a
◼
►
strategic slacker there it's like ah
◼
►
whatever most of this stuff is not
◼
►
really my problem like I know the nature
◼
►
of this work is all of this is somebody
◼
►
else's problem and they'll they'll
◼
►
contact me again I reminded of this
◼
►
every time the accountant that I pay
◼
►
every single month to do all of my tax
◼
►
stuff because I can't do it on my own
◼
►
when they send me an email and say can
◼
►
you confirm this is alright before we
◼
►
submit it and I think to myself why are
◼
►
we playing this game you know I don't
◼
►
know this right like you sending me this
◼
►
to be submitted for the taxman what is
◼
►
the point in me looking at it right this
◼
►
is what I'm reminded of this stuff that
◼
►
drives me I hate that so much it's like
◼
►
I do it on my own if I knew what this
◼
►
was yeah I completely agree that that
◼
►
always strikes me as as fraud and
◼
►
especially in my situation where it's
◼
►
like there's hundreds of pages going to
◼
►
two different countries and several
◼
►
different like legal structure is that
◼
►
it's just so complicated like yeah
◼
►
because also with three different
◼
►
citizenships like it's crazy
◼
►
and I always feel the same thing like
◼
►
like my accountants arranged a signing
◼
►
day where I have come in and there is
◼
►
just a table full of stacks of paper and
◼
►
they're like well you have to sign all
◼
►
right yeah and you have to agree we did
◼
►
yeah and and we play the game where
◼
►
they're like do you want some time to
◼
►
read these 300 pages go put a coffee on
◼
►
it's time yeah and they're like oh we
◼
►
sent this to you in PDF form yesterday
◼
►
and you agree that all of this is
◼
►
correct is like dude I always feel the
◼
►
same thing like I would never hire you
◼
►
if I could just do this like I would be
◼
►
doing this but thank you a lot of money
◼
►
yeah it's it's a it's always it is
◼
►
it's crazy making but there is that
◼
►
balance of like who needs who more in
◼
►
the email exchange and the other thing
◼
►
that's that's different here is I think
◼
►
the nature of being self-employed is
◼
►
that you you want to make sure you've at
◼
►
least reviewed all of the messages even
◼
►
if it's something from like six months
◼
►
ago there is a way in which I wouldn't
◼
►
feel good about declaring email
◼
►
bankruptcy being self-employed without
◼
►
having looked through those things and
◼
►
then the other thing which is not really
◼
►
it's not really broadly applicable but I
◼
►
just do sort of want to say so people
◼
►
understand the situation is that like
◼
►
when you're a person in the public view
◼
►
sometimes you get sent interesting
◼
►
emails that are like like the kind of
◼
►
thing that will happen to some someone
◼
►
will say like oh hey I listen to the
◼
►
show and I work at interesting place X
◼
►
next time you're in City Y if you ever
◼
►
want to see the behind the scenes like
◼
►
let me know and and that's the kind of
◼
►
thing where if someone sent that email
◼
►
six months ago it doesn't exactly demand
◼
►
a reply and it's a useful thing to kind
◼
►
of archive for future reference like oh
◼
►
when I'm in place why someone sent me an
◼
►
email about this thing and maybe it's
◼
►
cool to do right or where people just
◼
►
contact you because they're like oh hey
◼
►
I'm interesting person Z and I like your
◼
►
work if you're ever in City maybe we
◼
►
meet up for coffee that's also part of
◼
►
the like why am I going through
◼
►
this because I think of emails like that
◼
►
as like infrequent and if not and not
◼
►
even always accessible but like
◼
►
infrequent little gems and I do do my
◼
►
best to try to keep a record of all of
◼
►
those kind of things so that when I'm in
◼
►
a place I can try to search and be like
◼
►
oh has anyone in this locale ever
◼
►
contacted me about whatever and so
◼
►
that's that's also why I'm not gonna
◼
►
declare email bankruptcy because almost
◼
►
certainly there are messages like that
◼
►
that don't require a reply but are just
◼
►
like open doors in the future so it's
◼
►
it's the combination of all of these
◼
►
things like worrying about extreme
◼
►
negative downsides where the person
◼
►
sending a message doesn't really care
◼
►
about me following up like eventually
◼
►
it'll just be a big problem and then
◼
►
also like these very rare upsides mm-hmm
◼
►
so so that's why I am very slowly
◼
►
working my way through this and yeah I'm
◼
►
going going through email I actually
◼
►
only just started this morning a little
◼
►
bit of trying to go through the email
◼
►
opened up the old email and thought let
◼
►
me do this let me start digging how many
◼
►
are in there is not as terrible as
◼
►
people are probably thinking I have in I
◼
►
have in like the high hundreds of emails
◼
►
to go through it's not thousands of
◼
►
messages I how is it only that many I
◼
►
mean I'm a little bit confused about
◼
►
that because I'm assuming that you also
◼
►
just get a lot of just like people
◼
►
contacting you for things right like
◼
►
viewers and stuff like that one of the
◼
►
things that is great is that years ago I
◼
►
took down my public contact email off of
◼
►
the web and uh I don't think I've ever
◼
►
mentioned it but I've been really
◼
►
pleased that over the years there's been
◼
►
like a half-life of random people
◼
►
sending messages to that address that
◼
►
has gone down because they come to you
◼
►
enough of places right and don't Twitter
◼
►
and on Reddit and things like that I
◼
►
guess instead where you welcome it and
◼
►
engage and want to want it to be I think
◼
►
that is partly the factor like um
◼
►
reasonably active on Twitter and fairly
◼
►
active on Reddit especially when shows
◼
►
or videos go up so people know that they
◼
►
I was just like I just met to say I
◼
►
think which is like oh I am I'm very
◼
►
likely to see messages on reddit but
◼
►
that I mistook you like do I want to say
◼
►
that out loud because then people will
◼
►
try to contact me I read like I don't
◼
►
know whatever but like that is the case
◼
►
that like people send me a lot of
◼
►
messages through reddit and it's
◼
►
actually not a bad medium because I
◼
►
often don't feel any real obligation to
◼
►
reply and still things are sometimes
◼
►
interesting that come through there so I
◼
►
think there is a side effect of like
◼
►
accessibility in other areas plus like
◼
►
the Internet and people kind of
◼
►
forgetting what my actual email address
◼
►
is or just like not bothering to send
◼
►
stuff through there so over the years
◼
►
the the amount of messages that I would
◼
►
get via email from people who just
◼
►
listen to the podcast or watch the
◼
►
videos has dramatically decreased in
◼
►
this like half life kind of way which is
◼
►
quite frankly fantastic it's really
◼
►
great and then the other main factors
◼
►
are the things that we talked about in
◼
►
earlier show is just that I can much to
◼
►
my astonishment slack has absorbed I
◼
►
mean literally thousands of messages and
◼
►
communications that would have been
◼
►
emails before like it's it's just
◼
►
uncountable how many emails slack has
◼
►
so the real important communication
◼
►
happens through slack
◼
►
and then the other the other bit of a
◼
►
contributing factor is I do feel kind of
◼
►
bad about but like people who need to
◼
►
reach me for something important I have
◼
►
learned over the years don't contact me
◼
►
they just contact my assistant directly
◼
►
and they know that she will get a reply
◼
►
back to them a million times faster than
◼
►
if they try to contact me directly and
◼
►
no small part often because she can just
◼
►
get the answer or like she knows what
◼
►
and so like there are a lot of messages
◼
►
that go to her that I don't even see so
◼
►
right that's the only reason why my my
◼
►
situation of having not looked at email
◼
►
hardly at all last year has not resulted
◼
►
in like 20,000 messages it's resulted in
◼
►
number and there is a thing that like
◼
►
the messages that are left there are are
◼
►
all little bits looking at things this
◼
►
morning like idiosyncratic or difficult
◼
►
to deal with so they're not easy
◼
►
messages it's not it's not like a crazy
◼
►
pile that's going to take me an infinity
◼
►
of time to dig through it's it's just
◼
►
like a bunch of messages that I will
◼
►
hopefully clear eventually and that I do
◼
►
want to clear eventually because I know
◼
►
that there is some stuff in there that I
◼
►
wouldn't want to miss and I also want to
◼
►
be able to sleep well at night it's the
◼
►
plan though that you will continue to
◼
►
look at your email post the point of
◼
►
putting it all into order again yeah I
◼
►
think I think what will happen or what I
◼
►
would like to happen for the year of
◼
►
order is that I figure out where in my
◼
►
schedule I should put a clearing of the
◼
►
email and the problem is like as as time
◼
►
has gone on I have really found this
◼
►
interesting thing with my brain that has
◼
►
changed where my brain just really hates
◼
►
and is repelled by what I think of as
◼
►
administrative work in a way that it
◼
►
didn't used to be like I used to be much
◼
►
better at dealing with administrative
◼
►
work and I have definitely gotten way
◼
►
worse at that over the years I mean I my
◼
►
expectation would be it's because you
◼
►
have an assistant who handles a lot of
◼
►
that stuff for you now exactly like that
◼
►
like know no doubt about it that's one
◼
►
of the main reasons is that it's like oh
◼
►
there's a ton of the stuff that I don't
◼
►
have to do and then it then suddenly it
◼
►
switches to like oh I have to do this
◼
►
administrative tasks like oh that's
◼
►
terrible like how annoying so I have
◼
►
definitely gotten way worse at that but
◼
►
I need to as part of the year of order
◼
►
kind of sit down and figure out when is
◼
►
it that I'm going to clear clear through
◼
►
my email and it doesn't need to be
◼
►
unlike a very frequent basis obviously
◼
►
because I was able to get away with like
◼
►
barely looking at it last year but I
◼
►
need to do this so that I don't have the
◼
►
nagging feeling in the back of my head
◼
►
of like oh god is there something in
◼
►
email that I need to deal with like that
◼
►
that's the main reason why I want to do
◼
►
it but I am very much aware that the
◼
►
email feels a bit now
◼
►
like the physical mail that comes to my
◼
►
house where it's like oh this is a thing
◼
►
that I just I have to deal with yeah but
◼
►
it is in no way my primary method of
◼
►
communication or do I feel like it's
◼
►
it's a useful thing like email has
◼
►
really become a kind of janitorial task
◼
►
for me over time in a way that I find I
◼
►
find interesting as opposed to being
◼
►
what it used to be which is like a much
◼
►
more primary communication method well I
◼
►
wish you luck in finding that out Mike
◼
►
mmm-hmm I think I think of the two of us
◼
►
one of us is going to have an easier
◼
►
time with his future of email yeah I
◼
►
don't I don't think it's gonna be you in
◼
►
a way I'll let you know when I get to
◼
►
the bottom of my email and we'll see if
◼
►
you found an app before then ready set
◼
►
today's episode is also brought to you
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I'm getting stuff ready but when I get
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AFM so it's the cortex book-club time
◼
►
and we go so quite triggers anybody need
◼
►
to get out of the way we're gonna talk
◼
►
about triggers a lot and there's
◼
►
multiple meanings for the word triggers
◼
►
but triggers are a specific thing which
◼
►
are in this book which don't really have
◼
►
any meaning on the other whatever
◼
►
meanings of trigger but like this is
◼
►
kind of where we are really isn't even
◼
►
about triggers very much like I find
◼
►
like I find the title very funny in a
◼
►
whole bunch of ways and one of which is
◼
►
like it's like they picked a word that
◼
►
actually mentioned a ton in the book
◼
►
triggers are one part of many more parts
◼
►
to the systems and ideas that Goldsmith
◼
►
is trying to put across yeah so I don't
◼
►
know why they chose triggers like
◼
►
triggers are a big part of it but like
◼
►
the daily questions and the questions
◼
►
that he talks about active questioning
◼
►
is also as important it's very peculiar
◼
►
there's a whole bunch of other things
◼
►
and I'm absolutely convinced there was
◼
►
just a meeting at the publishers
◼
►
somewhere where they were trying to they
◼
►
were just trying to think of what the
◼
►
title should be and just pick it and
◼
►
like let's go for a thing that's a
◼
►
you know the book is published a few
◼
►
years ago before the word became
◼
►
slightly ridiculous and I think like oh
◼
►
that's a good word let's go with that
◼
►
and like oh no years later
◼
►
it makes readers snicker but it was just
◼
►
I'm sure that's what happened they were
◼
►
just tryin to pick a bold word to be the
◼
►
title of the book and yeah I don't I
◼
►
don't think it's a title that really
◼
►
suits the book very well and it's kind
◼
►
of funny you want to hear my kind of
◼
►
overall meta comments about this book I
◼
►
yeah I am I'm interested to know your
◼
►
of this book so I like that it wasn't
◼
►
too long six hours which is you know for
◼
►
a business book that is short
◼
►
yeah that a rapid-fire this was in part
◼
►
because for whatever reason they decided
◼
►
to not fill this book with unnecessary
◼
►
lists mmm-hmm there's not a lot of that
◼
►
in this book and that was a nice break
◼
►
to not have them list 25,000 things for
◼
►
every one thing and every time that
◼
►
there was a list I felt like that he was
◼
►
going somewhere with it
◼
►
right and he's actually only doing it to
◼
►
add context as opposed to filling pages
◼
►
it was read by the author which is
◼
►
always a concern for me but I think he
◼
►
did a pretty good job I think just think
◼
►
I didn't realize it was read by the
◼
►
author yeah and that's a red flag but
◼
►
like this guy did he actually did a good
◼
►
job it felt pretty genuine and he was
◼
►
actually pretty good at it and he didn't
◼
►
have any really peculiar ticks or
◼
►
anything that sometimes many people do
◼
►
right but that's why there are
◼
►
professional audio book readers I like
◼
►
that it was modern actually because this
◼
►
is the first business like advisee focus
◼
►
book that has clearly been written in
◼
►
the modern era because he very
◼
►
frequently mentions like Facebook and
◼
►
Twitter and apps and like it's gonna
◼
►
date this book horrific Lee but I liked
◼
►
that it was modern because I felt like
◼
►
these ideas have come at a time which is
◼
►
now as opposed to these ideas will come
◼
►
to 20 years ago and now they're just
◼
►
trying to make sure that they still
◼
►
apply yeah I am so used to these books
◼
►
being one of two things old or had a
◼
►
pose written by someone who feels really
◼
►
old yeah right like someone who has a
◼
►
mind that feels old and it was almost
◼
►
surprising every time there's a mention
◼
►
of like oh that's a book from a few
◼
►
years ago this guy read like oh all
◼
►
right that was a modern thing or talking
◼
►
about apps and things like that it's
◼
►
it's almost surprised I made it
◼
►
he made her there's an app for that joke
◼
►
at one point which I thought was yeah
◼
►
alright like this isn't a very good joke
◼
►
but I appreciate it anyway it was it was
◼
►
good in that sense right and I will say
◼
►
actually and I liked this book I
◼
►
actually liked it quite a lot
◼
►
I was not annoyed at this book like I
◼
►
usually am at these books so I think for
◼
►
that reason that you were right to
◼
►
recommend this one because it didn't
◼
►
drive me up the wall so that was good
◼
►
there was one there is one thing that
◼
►
was really really funny to me is like
◼
►
how very proud he is of his airmiles
◼
►
there's like a whole section up on that
◼
►
where he keeps talking about his air
◼
►
miles right like air miles come up a
◼
►
bunch then like he just throws in at one
◼
►
point that he has the American Airlines
◼
►
like super mega amazing club thing like
◼
►
in that George Clooney movie which he
◼
►
even references the George Clooney movie
◼
►
I like to explain it right he builds it
◼
►
into a story about talking to people in
◼
►
service industries and seeing how they
◼
►
react and if they're engaged or not
◼
►
but like it's all based around he's
◼
►
super special airmiles thing and it was
◼
►
it was really funny to me but yeah I
◼
►
thought it was good I thought it was
◼
►
good I have some quite I want to dive
◼
►
into some of like the the theories that
◼
►
I put forward in the book but I had a
◼
►
couple of questions for you
◼
►
mm-hmm I was wondering like why
◼
►
specifically you've recommended this
◼
►
book for me like what parts in this book
◼
►
did you think would be good for me my
◼
►
current situation and what did you learn
◼
►
from it as well I assume they're pretty
◼
►
similar things but I'm keen to
◼
►
understand that well I wanted to get
◼
►
your overall impressions first because I
◼
►
felt after the last recording that I had
◼
►
suddenly put myself on the hook a little
◼
►
bit and I feel like I have put myself on
◼
►
the hook a little bit with the listeners
◼
►
because when we've done most of these
◼
►
book clubs in the past it's very much a
◼
►
hey we're gonna read a book that's
◼
►
probably intolerable yeah you took a
◼
►
risk right that's a real easy thing to
◼
►
say right because you save most people
◼
►
from reading it and if someone reads it
◼
►
and it is intolerable like seven Habits
◼
►
in fact to people it's like well great
◼
►
warning right like it's my own dumb
◼
►
fault for reading this this crazy book
◼
►
and if the reader reads the book and
◼
►
they do like it well then they can just
◼
►
think oh he's wrong but I didn't waste
◼
►
my time like I like this book I got
◼
►
something out of it and I was just I've
◼
►
suddenly felt very aware of like oh I
◼
►
actually recommended the book and now I
◼
►
feel like oh god I'm on the hook right
◼
►
if the readers don't like it and if Mike
◼
►
doesn't like it recommended to me at a
◼
►
time when I really could do if not using
◼
►
six hours on something I think you heard
◼
►
me in the show I was trying to back off
◼
►
because I know like how Mike's really
◼
►
busy all right and somehow I felt like
◼
►
we got sucked into this vortex of I'm
◼
►
now going to steal six hours of your
◼
►
life away with this audiobook so yes I
◼
►
felt I felt very on the hook
◼
►
this time so I I'm I'm not gonna lie I
◼
►
am more than a bit relieved that you
◼
►
didn't you didn't start with a fiery
◼
►
tirade about how much you hated this
◼
►
book and how it was not worth your time
◼
►
and how you didn't you didn't need this
◼
►
nonsense right now in your life so I'm
◼
►
I'm I'm feeling quite relieved I will
◼
►
say with the exception of creativity Inc
◼
►
which is not really a business book
◼
►
right if the books that we've done it
◼
►
had some ideas in it but it was mostly a
◼
►
biography I feel like it's an outlier
◼
►
yeah I would say that this is the best
◼
►
one just from an entertainment
◼
►
perspective and from a lessons
◼
►
perspective I think it had the clearest
◼
►
ideas that were in a lot of ways new to
◼
►
me where a lot of these books feel like
◼
►
that they're kind of just telling you
◼
►
something you already know but giving
◼
►
you a different way of thinking about it
◼
►
mmm-hmm I thought this one was really
◼
►
smart and I liked a lot so that's why I
◼
►
felt like I could recommend it at the
◼
►
end of the last show is you know that
◼
►
this one was recommended to me by
◼
►
someone who said oh yeah this is this is
◼
►
pretty good as these things go and I
◼
►
really think that if someone's generally
◼
►
thinking about ideas about how to be
◼
►
productive or how to improve their
◼
►
situation in life I think this is a
◼
►
pretty good recommendation because it's
◼
►
partly like what I was joking about
◼
►
before that the title
◼
►
kind of makes no sense because the book
◼
►
talks about so much I feel like there
◼
►
it's relatively short but it also covers
◼
►
a lot of ground and that almost
◼
►
certainly there are going to be very
◼
►
different things in here that will
◼
►
resonate with people at different stages
◼
►
or or needing something different in
◼
►
their life and so part of the reason why
◼
►
I mentioned it to you was because we
◼
►
were talking about the journaling last
◼
►
time and I was thinking about how oh
◼
►
yeah there was this whole section that's
◼
►
like it's not exactly journaling but
◼
►
it's very journaling adjacent and that's
◼
►
the part that has had stuck with me and
◼
►
kind of made me want to read the book
◼
►
again but I also think for for someone
◼
►
who has read fewer of these books or
◼
►
like maybe someone who is more in the
◼
►
stage of his like trying to become a
◼
►
more effective or productive person I
◼
►
feel like the the first part of this
◼
►
book has a lot of great stuff in it as
◼
►
well of like here's a way of thinking
◼
►
about stuff you might just might not
◼
►
have thought about before and that
◼
►
that's the stuff that it'll be no
◼
►
surprise to listeners of the show that I
◼
►
really love like trying to talk to you
◼
►
and convince the reader like hey you're
◼
►
less in control of your choices than you
◼
►
may think you are but there's also a lot
◼
►
that you can do to try to increase your
◼
►
autonomy or to make better decisions in
◼
►
different circumstances and I think
◼
►
that's a it's a good thing for people to
◼
►
hear I feel like he does a pretty good
◼
►
job talking through that idea in a bunch
◼
►
of different ways and then there's
◼
►
there's just a lot of other ideas in the
◼
►
book which I think are good even if
◼
►
they're not applicable so I feel like in
◼
►
the middle third there's a bunch of
◼
►
stuff about like working with employees
◼
►
which I sort of skimmed over the first
◼
►
time and skimmed over again the second
◼
►
time but but this is but this is the
◼
►
same thing where it's like at that
◼
►
section is not really for me it's not
◼
►
super relevant for me and it doesn't
◼
►
matter and it also doesn't feel like I'm
◼
►
slogging through 200 pages of management
◼
►
theory that that's that section included
◼
►
the airmiles thing yeah okay that's so
◼
►
that's why I didn't didn't register in
◼
►
my wine because it's about employee
◼
►
engagement right and and even even there
◼
►
it's just like oh okay this is not for
◼
►
I can still see he has some interesting
◼
►
ideas about like here's four different
◼
►
ways to think about how your employees
◼
►
may respond to your feedback and from
◼
►
talking with other people who actually
◼
►
work in big like that seems to be a
◼
►
useful section if you're in the right
◼
►
situation but I can just blow past this
◼
►
and it doesn't matter so I just felt
◼
►
like there's a lot in it I think most of
◼
►
it's good and I really deeply
◼
►
appreciated like you said that it is not
◼
►
bogged down in a lot of the usual
◼
►
business book craziness like I don't
◼
►
think I have a single note about crazy
◼
►
stuff one of the things that many
◼
►
business books do is to use examples of
◼
►
people which we talk about all the time
◼
►
because they sound so ridiculous and
◼
►
this book uses examples heavily but I
◼
►
believe them because two reasons one
◼
►
they feel like real people and the other
◼
►
sometimes they are real identifiable
◼
►
people that he's talking about like he
◼
►
has a whole section talking about Alan
◼
►
Mulally the ex CEO of Ford right so like
◼
►
it's legit the guy actually does do
◼
►
things and help with like really
◼
►
important executives and so I if he's
◼
►
gonna tell one story that I can see is
◼
►
true that I'm willing to believe the
◼
►
rest as well and if I'd probably did
◼
►
some digging and could probably work out
◼
►
who the people are because you know he
◼
►
seems to be interesting in that way and
◼
►
like works with some interesting people
◼
►
but they're real people and that makes
◼
►
me respect the book way more if I
◼
►
believe that the person can actually do
◼
►
what they're saying they can do because
◼
►
they have a brute they have a track
◼
►
record which you can see exists if
◼
►
they've actually helped real successful
◼
►
people yeah the the examples of people
◼
►
in the book they're not Sarah's right
◼
►
stories where they're just wowed with
◼
►
how amazing the author is like an e myth
◼
►
revisited and view the author as some
◼
►
kind of savior figure who is passing on
◼
►
amazing knowledge and their entire life
◼
►
exists just to be a perfect parable of
◼
►
whatever the author wants they really do
◼
►
feel like actual people and like you
◼
►
said he has named actual people do
◼
►
you happen to look at in the beginning
◼
►
the the section where before the book
◼
►
starts but it's like people giving
◼
►
blurbs for the book have you did you
◼
►
take a look at that it's not in the
◼
►
audio book oh of course it's not in the
◼
►
this book has maybe the most impressive
◼
►
list of people I have ever seen giving
◼
►
blurbs for the book okay and working
◼
►
with the author give me some give me
◼
►
some names Jim Kim 12th president of the
◼
►
World Bank it's like I've had the great
◼
►
fortune of working with Marshall for
◼
►
several years and he has helped me in so
◼
►
many ways right as like just glowing
◼
►
praise so then it's like CEO of the New
◼
►
York City Public Library System CEO of
◼
►
the Harvard Business Review just like
◼
►
there's so many I'm trying to pick up
◼
►
the ones that are more recognizable but
◼
►
they're all they're all just crazy CEO
◼
►
and Managing Partner at goldman sachs
◼
►
CEO of Rothschilds group founder and
◼
►
chairman of Getty Images CEO of del
◼
►
Monte foods incorporated managing
◼
►
partner at the Blackstone Group CEO of
◼
►
Herman Miller yeah okay asbestos not
◼
►
messing around right like I have I have
◼
►
gone through 25 percent of the thanks
◼
►
for working with me section at the
◼
►
beginning of this book okay I have never
◼
►
seen anything like it it is just crazy
◼
►
so I didn't I didn't notice that until
◼
►
after having read it but going back it
◼
►
was like holy-moly like this is no joke
◼
►
and I think it's I was astounded by the
◼
►
authors business model where his
◼
►
business model is he will work with
◼
►
these high-powered people and he will
◼
►
not get paid unless people in the
◼
►
clients life agree that he has been
◼
►
effective at implementing change two
◼
►
years after they start working together
◼
►
it's like whoa that is a man who has set
◼
►
himself up in a situation where he is
◼
►
going to figure out what is
◼
►
actually effective and what is not and
◼
►
it is just remarkable that is it's not
◼
►
even that the client gets to say oh yes
◼
►
I think he was effective it's like no no
◼
►
the clients spouse gets to determine
◼
►
whether or not he should get paid and
◼
►
that is a much higher bar it is a way
◼
►
so yeah the author is totally not
◼
►
messing around and I think that is why
◼
►
the examples in the book feel real they
◼
►
did they don't feel forced or imaginary
◼
►
like he's just thinking about the
◼
►
clients he's worked with and people who
◼
►
are good examples of whatever he happens
◼
►
to be talking about so let's go through
◼
►
a couple of the things that a focus on
◼
►
we weren't good for everything because
◼
►
she said like I don't think that it's
◼
►
necessarily all applicable for everyone
◼
►
and there are some parts of this book
◼
►
where like I've heard things like this
◼
►
yeah the beginning section is about
◼
►
triggers and the triggers go hand in
◼
►
hand with behavioral change that's kind
◼
►
of what the book is about is like
◼
►
changing your behavior yeah and I I
◼
►
loved it like it basically starts off
◼
►
with being like look out up behavioral
◼
►
change is a really really hard thing to
◼
►
do like it's really hard to change your
◼
►
behavior as an adult I I love this as
◼
►
the start of the book and I feel like
◼
►
it's it's something that really sold me
◼
►
on it is because and I haven't
◼
►
highlighted you know his his section
◼
►
this is like literally page two is he's
◼
►
like I'm gonna tell you the truth and
◼
►
the truth is that meaningful behavioral
◼
►
change is very hard to do as it quote
◼
►
I'd go so far as to say that adult
◼
►
behavioral change is the most difficult
◼
►
thing for sentient human beings to
◼
►
accomplish I love that quote so much
◼
►
it's great and what I love about it is I
◼
►
really think it's true and he spends the
◼
►
next couple of pages kind of forcing you
◼
►
to think about it and and he's like when
◼
►
was the last time you changed some
◼
►
behavior in your life and he go he's
◼
►
kind of knocks down the things that
◼
►
people are going to mention where they
◼
►
just they just discuss something that's
◼
►
actually different in there like
◼
►
something that has happened to have
◼
►
changed but he's trying to find his case
◼
►
where like you have decided to do
◼
►
something differently and you were
◼
►
successful in maintain
◼
►
that change over a long period of time
◼
►
and it kind of makes me think of of like
◼
►
why I like to talk about the time
◼
►
tracking so much because I think he does
◼
►
do a pretty good job of making you take
◼
►
a brutal look in the mirror and see how
◼
►
horrific alee uneffective you have
◼
►
actually been at deciding to change
◼
►
something in your life and he's like and
◼
►
I think that's a great set it was like
◼
►
this is gonna be really hard what you
◼
►
need to do to change your behavior is
◼
►
simple but simple does it mean that it
◼
►
is easy and almost everybody fails at
◼
►
this almost all of the time and I just
◼
►
think that is such a refreshing start to
◼
►
a book like that because he even uses
◼
►
smoking as an example of not being
◼
►
enough because there are so many reasons
◼
►
that you might want to quit smoking that
◼
►
it's not really a behavioural change
◼
►
like you're doing it because your health
◼
►
is at risk or you're doing it but right
◼
►
people around you don't want you to do
◼
►
it anymore and so like it doesn't really
◼
►
count as changing a behavior you've just
◼
►
quit smoking Wow okay you know messing
◼
►
around there Goldsmith exactly it you're
◼
►
like don't tell me about your quitting
◼
►
smoking I'm not interested so we should
◼
►
talk about the triggers there's there's
◼
►
a couple of different things that he
◼
►
talks about with the triggers but the
◼
►
real meaty one the one that I found
◼
►
really interesting is what is referred
◼
►
to as environmental triggers so how and
◼
►
this is what really hit me your
◼
►
environment can make you react to things
◼
►
in certain ways so like for example if
◼
►
somebody speaks to you softly you will
◼
►
speak back to them softly that is an
◼
►
environmental trigger because something
◼
►
that you have no control over is making
◼
►
you react in a way that you wouldn't
◼
►
normally react if you had complete
◼
►
control of a situation so somebody being
◼
►
softly spoken will make you do that too
◼
►
and there are these types of things that
◼
►
happen in our lives constantly these
◼
►
different situations that were in
◼
►
different groups that were a part of
◼
►
that effect of the way that we react to
◼
►
certain situations and an individual
◼
►
throughout a day can go through a myriad
◼
►
of these things in what may make
◼
►
somebody appear to do something that is
◼
►
in direct direct conflict or something
◼
►
they did earlier in the day
◼
►
because they're in a different situation
◼
►
and he uses a great example of like a
◼
►
mother who is an executive right and at
◼
►
getting the children ready for school
◼
►
that is your environment and in that
◼
►
environment you are top of the tree the
◼
►
kids will listen to you and you get them
◼
►
ready and you send them off but well
◼
►
you're like a mid low level executive at
◼
►
a company you don't tell everyone what
◼
►
you're in an organization and you may do
◼
►
something for somebody that you wouldn't
◼
►
do at home and it's like wow like okay I
◼
►
right the environment that you're in can
◼
►
change the way that you react to certain
◼
►
requests and certain actions yeah I love
◼
►
this idea and I feel like this this
◼
►
really goes to the core of some of my
◼
►
beliefs about how how people act and in
◼
►
just just again in that this idea like
◼
►
you are in different circumstances a
◼
►
different person I don't know when I
◼
►
talk to people I find a lot of people
◼
►
have like a like a weird resistance to
◼
►
this idea or like they think of other
◼
►
people as like oh this person should be
◼
►
totally consistent all the time but like
◼
►
but nobody is like people act
◼
►
differently in different environments
◼
►
but I think he does do a very good job
◼
►
of trying to not just discuss that idea
◼
►
that you are different in different
◼
►
situations but trying to bring it to
◼
►
your attention about like when are you
◼
►
when are you acting like a better self
◼
►
or worse self yeah trying to identify
◼
►
like what is it in this environment that
◼
►
is making me act better or really the
◼
►
thing that he's mostly focusing on is
◼
►
what is the thing in this environment
◼
►
that is making you act worse and yeah he
◼
►
has a little detail which I really like
◼
►
which is thinking about the human
◼
►
environment not just the physical
◼
►
environment so he talks about people as
◼
►
an environment like you know if someone
◼
►
is not getting along with a colleague
◼
►
like he uses an example like a guy
◼
►
called Simon who's like causing problems
◼
►
for you with the office that you need to
◼
►
think about it as like you are now in
◼
►
the Simon environment and recognize that
◼
►
you have a history of acting poorly in
◼
►
what can you do like step one
◼
►
acknowledging that and then step two
◼
►
trying to think about how to react in
◼
►
those circumstances but I just I really
◼
►
like that idea of people and
◼
►
combinations of people as a as a kind of
◼
►
environment that they're not just like
◼
►
it's not like what I normally think of
◼
►
is like the physical space is the
◼
►
environment and the humans are like
◼
►
props inside that environment so you
◼
►
know the environment is the combination
◼
►
of all of these things I think that's a
◼
►
nice addition into how to think about
◼
►
the way you are acting or reacting to
◼
►
what's going on and this is where the
◼
►
triggers come in so you have the
◼
►
environment right so you use the Simon
◼
►
environment the person you don't get on
◼
►
with well at work that environment
◼
►
triggers you to react in a certain way
◼
►
and that might be that you become very
◼
►
short-tempered when you're around that
◼
►
person because they frustrate you and
◼
►
that's what you need to change you need
◼
►
to change the trigger you can't change
◼
►
the environment the environment is what
◼
►
but you have to try and change the way
◼
►
that you react in those environments and
◼
►
that's what the triggers are the trigger
◼
►
is how you react so like there is a
◼
►
thing that happens and different people
◼
►
react to that thing differently and
◼
►
every single person however they react
◼
►
that is the way that they are triggered
◼
►
some people can deal with certain things
◼
►
that other people can't
◼
►
etc etc that's the triggers are
◼
►
different for different people depending
◼
►
on the environment that they're in
◼
►
and the triggered response is the thing
◼
►
that you have to try and change if you
◼
►
want to make behavioural change so like
◼
►
some examples of ways that people have
◼
►
been able to do with this stuff is like
◼
►
he's an example of a guy who writes
◼
►
things down on an index card to remind
◼
►
him how to react in a certain way or
◼
►
there's a somebody who's taking friends
◼
►
out in a city and he's doing this a
◼
►
bunch and he's getting bored of like
◼
►
showing people the same tourist things
◼
►
so he has a reminder go off on his phone
◼
►
to remind him like don't be an idiot
◼
►
about this right because his usual
◼
►
trigger would be to get grumpy or if
◼
►
you're around Simon your usual trigger
◼
►
is to get like really snappy with Simon
◼
►
but your trigger needs to be not that
◼
►
right the way that you react in that
◼
►
needs to be not that and you have to try
◼
►
and change the way that you react in
◼
►
those instances environments yeah like I
◼
►
think that the practical example of the
◼
►
guy who getting bored showing visitors
◼
►
around the same events in the city I
◼
►
like what he's trying to suggest there
◼
►
is you have a little reminder pop up on
◼
►
your phone because phones exist in this
◼
►
modern business right I did note I
◼
►
thought like this is so simple but it's
◼
►
a great idea of having your phone pop-up
◼
►
a reminder every 45 minutes asking are
◼
►
you enjoying the time with your friends
◼
►
right to to change the mental framing
◼
►
from like I'm at this I'm at the Statue
◼
►
of Liberty for the 40th time that you
◼
►
change the framing to like my
◼
►
environment is that I am I'm with my
◼
►
friends and the question is like am i
◼
►
enjoying this time with them like don't
◼
►
focus on like oh I'm at the Statue of
◼
►
Liberty again that's not that's not the
◼
►
relevant thing here I thought like
◼
►
that's actually a pretty great idea to
◼
►
just have a little thing pop up to
◼
►
constantly remind you it's like yeah
◼
►
it's simple and it's dumb but I could
◼
►
totally see that being an effective
◼
►
thing to do and I've actually in a
◼
►
couple of scenarios used something like
◼
►
that whereas like just poke a little
◼
►
reminder to kind of ask me a question
◼
►
about the situation that I'm into like
◼
►
reframe it mentally and I think it's I
◼
►
think it's actually quite effective so
◼
►
use an example there of what clever
◼
►
active or engaging questions as a way to
◼
►
change the triggers so this is an idea
◼
►
of having a question that you ask
◼
►
yourself which is like an open question
◼
►
that you have to react to and this is
◼
►
how Goldsmith recommends that we change
◼
►
our triggers is by having these ways of
◼
►
checking in with ourselves on a frequent
◼
►
a regular basis usually with some method
◼
►
of accountability from another
◼
►
individual as a way to try and enforce a
◼
►
change in us so for example I'm gonna
◼
►
give some like a short list of questions
◼
►
that are given in the book is engaging
◼
►
questions so like did I do my best to
◼
►
set clear goals today did I do my best
◼
►
to be happy today did I do my best to be
◼
►
engaged today and these are like
◼
►
questions that you have to give some
◼
►
kind of answer to like you have to like
◼
►
all them in some way is the way that he
◼
►
recommends it's like you'd give your
◼
►
scarf self a score out of 10 or
◼
►
something for like how well did I do in
◼
►
each of these areas and this is one of
◼
►
the ways you will change your triggers
◼
►
the way that you react to things because
◼
►
you start to frame your life slightly
◼
►
differently yeah and this was this was
◼
►
really the core of the section that I
◼
►
was thinking of when when you were
◼
►
discussing journaling last time because
◼
►
because reading this book and sort of
◼
►
going through stuff and this to me feels
◼
►
like prime journaling material and I
◼
►
think this this to me was that what was
◼
►
the part of the book that that stuck
◼
►
I noticed it like as soon as I got to
◼
►
this section I could see why you
◼
►
recommended the book to me hmmm yeah and
◼
►
there's a few things that I really I
◼
►
really liked about this and okay so one
◼
►
of the things is he has these questions
◼
►
that he asks himself every day and they
◼
►
all start with did you try your best to
◼
►
and when I first start reading this
◼
►
stuff I kind of like roll my eyes a
◼
►
little bit but then he immediately
◼
►
addresses exactly what's going on and I
◼
►
thought like this is this is actually a
◼
►
great linguistic change that he makes
◼
►
that he makes the point that we totally
◼
►
treat effort as what he calls like a
◼
►
second-class citizen and that what
◼
►
matters in behavior change is like it's
◼
►
not actually the absolute record of
◼
►
success or failure that what matters is
◼
►
you were keeping it in your mind as this
◼
►
is a thing that you are trying to do and
◼
►
so in with that framing like it's
◼
►
perfectly okay to fail to achieve
◼
►
behavior change on particular days
◼
►
because that's not what the question is
◼
►
asking it's asking like did you try I
◼
►
feel like this book really changed my
◼
►
mind on that kind of framing around
◼
►
trying versus succeeding that like
◼
►
effort really does count in this field
◼
►
in a way that in other fields it totally
◼
►
doesn't count like there's many places
◼
►
like a for effort means F for
◼
►
achievement and I'm so used to that as
◼
►
being the default but I just I really
◼
►
like this there's different framing of
◼
►
things and that is the part that has
◼
►
stuck with me the most is thinking about
◼
►
trying to rework a journal into my
◼
►
regular life with a series of these
◼
►
questions about like did you try your
◼
►
best to whatever and I don't know I just
◼
►
that that was the part that really
◼
►
really struck me and I thought it I
◼
►
thought it's just it makes something in
◼
►
my mind clear about these questions and
◼
►
when I've thought about the kinds of
◼
►
things that I would want to change in my
◼
►
own life I'm very aware that the trying
◼
►
framework is is different because is
◼
►
like um you know I often go on stretches
◼
►
where I am stricter or looser with say
◼
►
limiting the carbohydrates in my diet
◼
►
and when I when I've thought about that
◼
►
for like oh I'm trying to reduce
◼
►
carbohydrates in my diet there's
◼
►
something very different about the the
◼
►
decision moments in life where it's like
◼
►
oh maybe I could eat a pizza right and
◼
►
there's something different about
◼
►
thinking like oh I have failed today to
◼
►
do this thing versus it feels way worse
◼
►
to think like if I press a button and a
◼
►
pizza comes to my house I didn't even
◼
►
try right and it's like oh that makes me
◼
►
kind of re reframe this in in a very
◼
►
different way where it's like it's
◼
►
somehow weird like it's almost more
◼
►
acceptable to just fail right like the
◼
►
difference is having a slice of toast is
◼
►
like okay I didn't do the best I could
◼
►
have done today I ma me maybe I scored
◼
►
like a seven out of ten
◼
►
mm-hmm it's compared to like if you
◼
►
didn't have if it was like a binary yes
◼
►
on though you could eat an entire
◼
►
baguette right right and it wouldn't
◼
►
matter because you've already failed
◼
►
today so you may as well fail
◼
►
spectacularly yeah exactly supposed to
◼
►
grading yourself on like like how well
◼
►
did I do well okay I had a piece of
◼
►
toast but I only have one piece yeah as
◼
►
opposed to like well I just ate the
◼
►
entire loaf because why not
◼
►
right like I've already failed yeah like
◼
►
yeah it avoids a kind of cascade of
◼
►
failures where you feel like I haven't
◼
►
thing at all so I might as well really
◼
►
not do it so like one of the just a very
◼
►
very slick if you're struggling like
◼
►
conceptualize this God focus an example
◼
►
of a very simple question so did you
◼
►
mm-hmm right and that is like a yes or a
◼
►
No right did I have a good day three no
◼
►
I didn't have a good day today this is
◼
►
very different to what he thinks is a
◼
►
bad question which is what did you do
◼
►
today to make a positive impact mm-hmm
◼
►
that is very different as a question
◼
►
because you may not have had a good day
◼
►
but you might have done one thing that
◼
►
was good yeah so now the day wasn't a
◼
►
complete failure yeah or even just a
◼
►
more simple rephrasing of did I try to
◼
►
have a good day today like immediately
◼
►
changes moments in your life or you feel
◼
►
like you were being grumpy just to be
◼
►
grumpy you weren't even trying to have a
◼
►
good day whereas it's way easier to
◼
►
score it is like no I didn't have a good
◼
►
day at all I was super grumpy and it's
◼
►
just I think it really is just a just a
◼
►
super great reframing of this but he
◼
►
does suggest this is where the
◼
►
journaling comes in it's like you're
◼
►
keeping a record over time and that like
◼
►
you're you're checking in at a
◼
►
particular time and seeing how these
◼
►
things are going and of course I totally
◼
►
just like the section in the beginning
◼
►
he also acknowledges like this is is
◼
►
really hard to do and if you are scoring
◼
►
yourself honest honestly he talks again
◼
►
about like it's really hard to at the
◼
►
beginning face the reality that like you
◼
►
claim these things are important but
◼
►
you're not even trying if you're being
◼
►
honest with the scoring a lot of the
◼
►
times and again I just think that's
◼
►
great and it all again it makes me think
◼
►
of the time tracking where it's like
◼
►
it's just so brutal to look at when you
◼
►
first begin but that's kind of the point
◼
►
and so when you're trying to come up
◼
►
with a list of questions about
◼
►
behavioral changes that you want like
◼
►
you should totally expect that you're
◼
►
going to have a real brutal list of
◼
►
numbers to look at sometimes and that's
◼
►
that's to force you to think about are
◼
►
you really trying is this a thing that
◼
►
you actually want to do right now or is
◼
►
this a thing that like is not really a
◼
►
priority in your life one of his little
◼
►
antidotes is he's talking about
◼
►
a discussion with Atul Gawande who is
◼
►
the author of the checklist manifesto
◼
►
his book I've talked about before is
◼
►
really liking the details of the
◼
►
anecdotal area like here's a guy who was
◼
►
written a book on checklists who is
◼
►
unable to do a simple thing in his life
◼
►
it was to sign up the life insurance
◼
►
yeah that's yeah that's what it was like
◼
►
just to sign up for life insurance and
◼
►
he just his question then at the end of
◼
►
the day is like did you try to set up
◼
►
any kind of life insurance for your
◼
►
family today and it's like an incredibly
◼
►
successful guy who's a doctor who is a
◼
►
multiple New York Times bestselling
◼
►
author who wrote a book on literal
◼
►
checklists like even this guy has things
◼
►
on his mind that he feels like oh this
◼
►
is super important and I should do and
◼
►
has to face the grim reality of you
◼
►
didn't even try today to do this thing
◼
►
that you claim is so important and
◼
►
eventually I could guilt guilt trips
◼
►
himself into into doing it but I just
◼
►
always like to see that kind of thing
◼
►
that is like even people who are very
◼
►
successful have these kinds of problems
◼
►
so Atul Gawande says like there was a
◼
►
quote from him in the book that like
◼
►
this system changed his life right thing
◼
►
is I believe it because he named him
◼
►
because this is an example of when in
◼
►
other books you would roll your eyes to
◼
►
be like all someone who wrote the book
◼
►
on checklists needed your question for
◼
►
his checklist to be able to actually do
◼
►
a thing but I will believe it because
◼
►
you named the guy because you can say
◼
►
you were lying right so it's like this
◼
►
is an example of why I'm willing to like
◼
►
I'm more willing to believe that this
◼
►
system works because the examples are
◼
►
believable because the examples are
◼
►
supposed to show me the system works so
◼
►
if I believe the examples I believe that
◼
►
there's value in the system hmm now I've
◼
►
really really liked this engaging
◼
►
question saying but and I have a problem
◼
►
for it so I created a small list of
◼
►
questions for myself but I'm not sure
◼
►
how to integrate them into my journal it
◼
►
wouldn't work like I don't want to write
◼
►
seven questions out every single day and
◼
►
then score them so like I'm trying to
◼
►
find a way to make it make sense for me
◼
►
maybe I have like a different part of
◼
►
the book where I kind of keep a score
◼
►
maybe in the back or something I haven't
◼
►
worked this out yet but I'm I'm gonna
◼
►
try and I'm willing to share the
◼
►
questions if you were interested to hear
◼
►
them I am interested to hear them
◼
►
although I'm just I'm curious like if
◼
►
you use some sort of digital paper
◼
►
system you could just I don't want to
◼
►
you know when you said to me that you
◼
►
were you were really impressed I kept
◼
►
the journal going like so easily part of
◼
►
it is because I love using my pens and
◼
►
paper right of course right so getting
◼
►
to do that every day brings a joy to me
◼
►
that doing up my iPad wouldn't and so if
◼
►
I want to integrate this into my system
◼
►
I need to find a practical way of doing
◼
►
it and I just have you know what that is
◼
►
yet I have seven flash like great copy
◼
►
and paste tell me tell me what your
◼
►
questions are okay did I do my best to
◼
►
be creative today did I do my best to
◼
►
advance new ideas today did I do my best
◼
►
to make sure revenue is being generated
◼
►
did I do my best to make my colleagues
◼
►
feel valued did I do my best to do
◼
►
something good for Edina did I do my
◼
►
best to engage with my audience and did
◼
►
I do my best to improve my health they
◼
►
are my questions so far yeah those are
◼
►
those are good and I tried to keep them
◼
►
open I tried to keep them like vague
◼
►
like the one did I do my best to make
◼
►
sure revenue is being generated they're
◼
►
like a bunch of different ways that I
◼
►
can answer that question and I could
◼
►
have said did I do my best to make a
◼
►
sale today that's very different yeah
◼
►
the revenue one is a way better question
◼
►
so I thought hard about that one because
◼
►
I wanted to have something in there
◼
►
right because I saw podcast sponsorships
◼
►
but it's not the only way my company can
◼
►
generate revenue and like there are
◼
►
other things that I can do to try and
◼
►
like set a basis for doing this as
◼
►
opposed to actually making a sale and I
◼
►
figured that that would be for my
◼
►
personal mental health more important
◼
►
then because the sales don't happen
◼
►
every day because they don't need to
◼
►
they have grown if they happen every
◼
►
week then we're doing great right like
◼
►
you could get one sale a week and it's
◼
►
fine because they happen in
◼
►
in like chunks of time so I wouldn't
◼
►
want to be every single day beating
◼
►
myself up over not signing a contract
◼
►
yeah so yeah the thing a little detail
◼
►
that I like here in the book as well is
◼
►
well it starts out with that tough love
◼
►
of guess what this is going to be really
◼
►
hard and guess what you're gonna say
◼
►
things that are important to you you're
◼
►
gonna not even try for a week every day
◼
►
to do them he immediately goes to this
◼
►
example of like and guess what your
◼
►
questions are going to be that different
◼
►
from everybody else's questions oh I
◼
►
loved that I was like you're gonna be a
◼
►
cliche but there's a reason yeah yeah
◼
►
yeah he totally says like yeah he's like
◼
►
you're gonna be just like everybody else
◼
►
right and so to paraphrase is slightly
◼
►
he says like your goals will be plucked
◼
►
from a classic self-improvement menu the
◼
►
menu we all feast on lose weight get fit
◼
►
get organized learn something new quit a
◼
►
bad habit save more money help others
◼
►
spend more time with family travel to
◼
►
new places fall in love and be less
◼
►
stressed what's great is if he finishes
◼
►
with because you feel a bit like oh I
◼
►
guess I'm just like another sheep in
◼
►
this system but I love the he
◼
►
acknowledges like the fact that other
◼
►
people have similar goals doesn't make
◼
►
those goals less worthy and I feel like
◼
►
that really does free you up to be able
◼
►
to have just like boring anodyne goals
◼
►
and that's fine alright this is the same
◼
►
goals everybody has and there is nothing
◼
►
wrong with that and I just I really like
◼
►
that he took a moment to explicitly call
◼
►
that out of like hey you don't need to
◼
►
be super creative with these questions
◼
►
like these are the things that as a
◼
►
human race we have agreed upon will make
◼
►
us happy yeah this is the stuff that
◼
►
everybody wants to do and is a reason
◼
►
for it so I just but I really like that
◼
►
little moment just be like don't worry
◼
►
you need to be super fancy with your did
◼
►
I generate revenue today right it's like
◼
►
whatever you want to lose weight welcome
◼
►
to the Western world you're it's fine
◼
►
that's perfectly fine to have as a goal
◼
►
there was one last part I wanted to
◼
►
touch on with this book which happens
◼
►
before the questions because so the
◼
►
questions are about creating a system of
◼
►
accountability right that's what you do
◼
►
you create these questions and then if
◼
►
you want to make your change you have to
◼
►
answer the questions and you're
◼
►
accountable to the questions
◼
►
but before that he talks about like why
◼
►
we need this type of system and it's
◼
►
because as humans we are superior
◼
►
planners and inferior doers so like
◼
►
saying that each individual is both a
◼
►
leader and a follower in the morning at
◼
►
the beginning of our day the leader is
◼
►
ready for action setting out our tasks
◼
►
and wanting and like believing this is
◼
►
the stuff I want to do today and I'm
◼
►
gonna achieve all of it then you hand
◼
►
over to the follower part of yourself
◼
►
who has to then execute on the leaders
◼
►
plan and that doesn't work out because
◼
►
we get tired or we get distracted like
◼
►
is in the same way that if you have
◼
►
anybody work for you you may ask them to
◼
►
do a task but it doesn't get completed
◼
►
right you do that to yourself every
◼
►
single day and this was like one of the
◼
►
most genius things I've ever heard in
◼
►
business training is the systems of
◼
►
leadership and motivation that we
◼
►
learned to try and motivate and lead
◼
►
other people you have to do to yourself
◼
►
mm-hmm and it like oh but this like open
◼
►
my mind like that is a genius right that
◼
►
like we learn all of these things about
◼
►
leadership styles and mentorship styles
◼
►
and like how to motivate and engage
◼
►
people but we never think about the fact
◼
►
that you also have to do it to yourself
◼
►
because you rely on yourself to do work
◼
►
every day and I was like oh my god that
◼
►
I loved it yeah it's a really great part
◼
►
of the book and it also goes to that
◼
►
idea of like not not being a consistent
◼
►
self that you react differently in these
◼
►
different environments but also the
◼
►
again I love how he points out like how
◼
►
many times have you successfully
◼
►
implemented the plan the morning you had
◼
►
it's like wow I can count those numbers
◼
►
of days like on one hand because morning
◼
►
you is always way optimistic about what
◼
►
can actually occur and as like Oh 2:00
◼
►
p.m. you is real sleepy I just I think
◼
►
it's I think it is a great framing it's
◼
►
a great way to be aware of things and I
◼
►
like it on both ends where he's trying
◼
►
amp down planning use desires and and
◼
►
trying to do do they like you set up
◼
►
things for the you who is going to be
◼
►
lazier in the future right and you try
◼
►
you try to make it easy for that guy and
◼
►
that guy's gonna need some serious
◼
►
management help and for morning you it's
◼
►
he has a hard time recognizing that and
◼
►
I do like that he just really calls out
◼
►
that part of your plan about any kind of
◼
►
behavior change has to include the easy
◼
►
to forget fact that in the future you
◼
►
will not be as motivated as you
◼
►
currently are and you have to take that
◼
►
into account and I just I think it's
◼
►
such it's such an obvious oh my knee of
◼
►
these points like some of them are
◼
►
they're very obvious but it's great to
◼
►
do draw that in to be like you need to
◼
►
explicitly think about this all business
◼
►
book stuff is obvious once you hear it
◼
►
but it's about the way they codify it I
◼
►
think that's what's so like another
◼
►
great example is saying about weather
◼
►
forecasting like people that care about
◼
►
the weather check the weather constantly
◼
►
and adjust their days to match is that
◼
►
why don't we do that for ourselves in
◼
►
our tasks and motivations for the day
◼
►
like you set out with an idea in the
◼
►
daytime but you're keeping track of what
◼
►
is going on and adjusting on the fly to
◼
►
deal with that and it's like all of this
◼
►
stuff is just like this is a really good
◼
►
book this is a very good book I like it
◼
►
a lot there's one there's many many more
◼
►
points in the book we could cover but I
◼
►
really think that this is booking it a
◼
►
lot in it and it and there's like a
◼
►
bunch of things that I would I highlight
◼
►
it because I feel like ooh this really
◼
►
this really speaks to me in my
◼
►
particular situation but might not be
◼
►
interesting in a general conversation
◼
►
but he made one point that again is so
◼
►
obvious but to hear someone just talk
◼
►
about it in a clear way is like you know
◼
►
that's an excellent point and one of the
◼
►
things he talks about is activities that
◼
►
have a certain kind of inertia and you
◼
►
just talked about being aware that
◼
►
whatever you're doing it's often very
◼
►
hard to stop doing that thing
◼
►
and so it's like okay you sit down to
◼
►
watch a little bit of Netflix and nobody
◼
►
watches a little bit of Netflix right
◼
►
and it just it made me think about like
◼
►
one of these pieces of productivity
◼
►
advice that I've always thought like is
◼
►
they're human on earth who can do this
◼
►
because it's not me you'll hear people
◼
►
say things like why don't you work for a
◼
►
little while and then you give yourself
◼
►
a break a nice reward and you spend 10
◼
►
minutes on social media and then you go
◼
►
right back to work and you know it's a
◼
►
reward for having like does anybody do
◼
►
is there anybody on the face of the
◼
►
earth who's like well does Buddha at
◼
►
Mario Kart for 10 minutes just play a
◼
►
couple races and then I'll get right
◼
►
back into that important work I was
◼
►
doing like nobody does that
◼
►
and so you talked about this this idea
◼
►
of inertia and there's something that's
◼
►
been creeping up in my mind which he
◼
►
doesn't talk about but like I've started
◼
►
to think about the flip side of that
◼
►
because I was thinking like wait a
◼
►
minute there are a bunch of activities
◼
►
that aren't this way things like
◼
►
exercise all right or things like
◼
►
writing a script or certain kinds of
◼
►
very intense work I feel like I've come
◼
►
to recognize this category of things
◼
►
that I'm thinking of as self terminating
◼
►
activities I really think that there is
◼
►
there's an importance in recognizing
◼
►
that there are a lot of things that are
◼
►
self terminating activities versus the
◼
►
stuff that he's talking about like
◼
►
inertial activities and I feel like this
◼
►
is I haven't quite settled my thoughts
◼
►
on this entirely but there's something
◼
►
here about gaining an understanding of
◼
►
the distinction between these two things
◼
►
and that in in general self terminating
◼
►
activities are are things that you'd
◼
►
rather spend your time on than inertial
◼
►
activities where you can just do them
◼
►
forever that there's that there's I
◼
►
don't know I jump I wish I could explain
◼
►
this better in my head but just it's
◼
►
just something that has been on my mind
◼
►
since I first read the book is this this
◼
►
thought of like things worth doing
◼
►
emanating and things that are enjoyable
◼
►
but maybe less worthy in a way have this
◼
►
inertial quality that he talks about
◼
►
that you just want to keep doing them
◼
►
for forever but and it's just it's just
◼
►
a thing that struck me and I'm gonna
◼
►
again recommend the book pretty highly
◼
►
because I feel like there's a lot in
◼
►
here that even if some of it doesn't
◼
►
seem to resonate at all I think that
◼
►
almost everybody will find something
◼
►
that you feel like sticks sticks with
◼
►
you after you've read the book yeah I
◼
►
recommend it I really do recommend it
◼
►
this is this is a good pick there's a
◼
►
lot of interesting stuff in there as we
◼
►
said like it's not a big book I
◼
►
recommend going to it there's like a
◼
►
bunch of like still really practical
◼
►
things we've not even touched on that
◼
►
there's there's a lot we haven't touched
◼
►
on I think there's I think people could
◼
►
get a lot from this so I recommend it so
◼
►
again it's triggers by Marshall
◼
►
Goldsmith it's very very good book
◼
►
before we go cortex much calm cortex
◼
►
much calm go there by merch at cortex
◼
►
much calm cortex Murch dot-com