Hello Internet

H.I. #32: YouTube Half-Assery


00:00:00   Like when paper when we're not recalling these people ever hear my voice from a recording this is how I talk then [TS]

00:00:06   and then a senator the claps you get this like silky smooth he's awesome. Whatever thing. [TS]

00:00:16   We have a document a shared document bursting with stuff to talk about [TS]

00:00:22   and I think we've pinned down who wrote most of them. [TS]

00:00:25   There's only one or two there that are mysterious to us as to who we write them. So we should crack on. [TS]

00:00:32   Yes I guess I guess we should OK you meet others I'll do the first one I don't think so that man thinks about some [TS]

00:00:41   things with a smooth handover. Yeah those great professional Our first item of follow up. [TS]

00:00:49   I am relieved to let everybody know that science says listening to podcasts [TS]

00:00:55   and audiobooks in the car is not a distraction. [TS]

00:01:00   The very study that actually referenced last time that University of Utah study plus a bunch of other ones that people [TS]

00:01:07   sent to me all confirm the same thing that basically listening to an audiobook on average is not super distracting. [TS]

00:01:13   Apparently if you're Brady It is distracting because his wife says oh so with always these things you have to listen to [TS]

00:01:20   your wife if she thinks you're driving terribly in the car. [TS]

00:01:22   Maybe you should pay attention to her [TS]

00:01:24   but at least a distinctly speaking the average person is not in a great deal of danger if they're listening to an [TS]

00:01:29   audiobook. This is according to the University of Utah study. Yes that's right. [TS]

00:01:34   Did you read the whole thing like at the end of it say the study was brought to you by audible dot com. [TS]

00:01:39   No no it did not but I was happy to see that there were it was not just a single study [TS]

00:01:43   but there were a number of studies that were confirming the same thing. [TS]

00:01:46   They didn't give a mechanism as to why [TS]

00:01:49   but I'm still going to put down my my guess as the theory that the no social obligation allows people to tune stuff out [TS]

00:01:56   immediately as opposed to actually listening to another human being. But. [TS]

00:02:00   It is that that is just me totally guessing I have nothing to back that up except my gut feeling [TS]

00:02:05   but you apparently are not allowed to listen to podcasts and audiobooks in the carburetor on the stove. [TS]

00:02:09   Apparently my driving just not as good [TS]

00:02:11   but like I said my wife who was complaining about my driving say now OK so it's just a terrible driver that's that's [TS]

00:02:18   probably going to take time from all of the people under my driving next to the microphone [TS]

00:02:28   and so I think it is pod cast as freight. Yes like it is free. Next item up quick little thing. [TS]

00:02:36   We also asked last time is there any doctors in the audience to describe for us the knee reflex phenomenon which you [TS]

00:02:44   apparently only learned about when you were a grown up. [TS]

00:02:47   There's something here in doctor's office when you were twenty five the first time you had the. [TS]

00:02:50   New reflex comes out as now and I don't need to go to doctors. [TS]

00:02:53   Yes that's right you do if you do love as hard as nails thing you say it enough times people [TS]

00:02:58   but I will loop it in many many times that people kind of that I have I have a feeling that that is definitely the case [TS]

00:03:06   that this is not people that's what I don't get to hear about you being artisanal any doctors in the audience. [TS]

00:03:12   There were many doctors in the audience. [TS]

00:03:13   Many doctors on Twitter many doctors via e-mail it is a neurological test they're doing so there is not the reflex that [TS]

00:03:21   they that they care about so much. [TS]

00:03:24   But apparently this is like was it the porridge in the three little bears it has to be just right. [TS]

00:03:30   That if if you have too little of a knee reflex [TS]

00:03:33   or if you have too much of a renew reflex they can indicate different neurological problems. [TS]

00:03:39   So you can change a test if you sit there. [TS]

00:03:42   OK so now we have the quote if you sit there [TS]

00:03:43   and you try not to it's like if you tense your leg I bet it would still work [TS]

00:03:49   but the thing would still work because we eat the way you could change it there if you could predict you could try [TS]

00:03:54   and predict when you think you're going to get hit early so I think that might be obvious to the doctor if you. [TS]

00:04:00   Start ticking before he actually hits you I think know better than I But if you time it so that you start you kick [TS]

00:04:05   after the hit like you know I like racing drivers like just trying to get it just right on the changes a lot. [TS]

00:04:12   I don't know what I'm talking about I don't know what you're talking about either [TS]

00:04:16   but if nothing changes I think there's a but. But yes the only way it turns out that if it if you kick them. [TS]

00:04:23   I mean look at the note that I have here so if you get if you kick too much it's a problem with your brain if you kick [TS]

00:04:32   not enough it's a problem with your spine and the reflex stuff and many people pointed out the thing with reflexes. [TS]

00:04:38   Also related to smashing coffee cups last time that is interesting is that it doesn't actually go to your brain which [TS]

00:04:45   of course is why reflexes can be so automatic most of the time it's some if you throw something [TS]

00:04:49   or you move reflectively it is actually your spine that has relayed that message back [TS]

00:04:55   and forth because you can't wait for that message to get all the way to your brain [TS]

00:04:58   and back to prevent yourself from getting injured. So anyway reflexes super fast and that's the doctor one of four. [TS]

00:05:04   Speaking of doctors in the audience Yes Can I just bring something up that wasn't in a notes so I just need to look for [TS]

00:05:13   something and I'm just taking time or I'm just looking for. Play like him and they can do. [TS]

00:05:23   We were now concentrating so much on singing the song that I hear a couple episodes [TS]

00:05:30   or two ago I think I sort of jokingly said [TS]

00:05:34   and one of the last episode actually I jokingly said that you know lawmakers [TS]

00:05:39   and legislators listening to hello internet had responded to something Gray said and some throw oil on them. [TS]

00:05:45   Anyway I got this message on Reddit [TS]

00:05:48   and you know I know I know you should trust nothing on Reddit from someone saying Oh no lawmakers don't listen [TS]

00:05:55   and this person said I work in the House of you know Kong. [TS]

00:06:00   Yes in Washington and I said I listened you know how the Internet and of course some [TS]

00:06:04   when I was here that this is how I would stand quite often with this thing to have the Internet in the cafeteria. [TS]

00:06:09   So I sent that to me [TS]

00:06:12   and I can't find the original the original message which was on the original message of Cook's going to school [TS]

00:06:20   or scrolling through my message to try and find this image you'll find it before May Yes [TS]

00:06:26   but as I'm scrolling to try invited there's only there's only two things I'm scrolling past pictures of dogs [TS]

00:06:31   and then there's a picture of a pizza [TS]

00:06:33   or other food items like dog food up on the other methods for finding message right [TS]

00:06:41   and I had to work read it well enough to find the original. I'm following I think I can pull it up here. [TS]

00:06:48   OK I've got it here let me let me reset Grace found that you read you read what this person wrote [TS]

00:06:53   or an abridged version. I can't I can't live a bridge that's asking for a lot. [TS]

00:07:00   Send it to me and I'll love you again sending it to you right now. [TS]

00:07:03   Now I have the beach ball to the beach ball spinning on my computer man. [TS]

00:07:07   Well my message not to join the bandwagon of people complaining about Apple is going to go i Message been horrifically [TS]

00:07:13   buggy for me on the phone on my computer it's very frustrating. I get the blank big lag big lag. [TS]

00:07:19   Yeah have you sent for your article. [TS]

00:07:21   No because under sitting here with a beach ball now my whole system's beach ball and I could've found it by now [TS]

00:07:26   and I think the computer should play the girl from Ipanema whenever it beach balls. [TS]

00:07:30   Here you summarize this I can't count my vote. [TS]

00:07:34   I can't read [TS]

00:07:34   and summarize at the same time I couldn't even I couldn't even read the thing from the Dr I prepared to try to [TS]

00:07:39   summarize this person said that they're working that the two of us in the Congress and I listen to the show [TS]

00:07:46   and I said I thought you'd like to know that everything from Lulu to monkey copyright has been heard in a cafeteria. [TS]

00:07:53   You make jokes about things but you do have listeners in places more than you could imagine etc Now if it was. [TS]

00:08:00   I'm not flattering mentally but because I said are we listening to in the Congress [TS]

00:08:05   and stuff I was like oh like probably like Stouffer's or maybe they're you know they work in the cafeteria [TS]

00:08:13   or something they could have some service job there or something. [TS]

00:08:16   So I jokingly replied to this person you know tremendous power there [TS]

00:08:21   and then this person replied basically saying that they're a congressperson like I'm like a member of the Congress. [TS]

00:08:31   It is it is on the right it's I don't know how much you can trust us. Exactly so this is why I don't know what to do. [TS]

00:08:37   Look it seems quite genuine but then I'm thinking red it's full of people who have silly delays and taken for sinus [TS]

00:08:46   but if if this person if you if you're listening [TS]

00:08:49   and you're a member of the Congress if you send a picture of yourself on the floor of Congress holding your i Phone [TS]

00:08:57   with the hello internet logo showing on your overcast [TS]

00:09:01   or your pod cast player of choice we will then believe that there is a congressman [TS]

00:09:07   or congresswoman who is listening to how the Internet and that would be that would be a little bit exciting. [TS]

00:09:12   But that would not that there would be a little bit exciting. [TS]

00:09:15   See I know it's probably fake In fact I know it's almost definitely fake [TS]

00:09:19   but you know this is a this is the fun of the Internet though you never know what's real what's not real what's you [TS]

00:09:27   know it's like the whole internet is filled with just pranksters to maybe you know maybe it's not [TS]

00:09:32   and then that will happen is we will going to find it and then will be convinced it's been photo shopped [TS]

00:09:35   or fake though we'll never know we'll never know. [TS]

00:09:39   You can tell from the pixels if it's been Photo Shopped you say minutes like do you think it's possible as a member of [TS]

00:09:45   the Congress listening. [TS]

00:09:46   I mean are you asking is it is it possible of course it's possible of course it's like technically possible that isn't [TS]

00:09:52   that what you're asking me right now is it possible. [TS]

00:09:54   Yes Well it is but you know what I mean I really within the realm of possibility it's possible that the. [TS]

00:10:00   Listen to how it went today that it's he has it on his i Phone so that overcast sentiment announcements the instant [TS]

00:10:06   though the new show is there and he listens right away. That's entirely possible I don't think it's very likely. [TS]

00:10:13   Yeah now you've put the idea that the president's listening into my head. [TS]

00:10:17   You you have just these grandiose vision of how far your work in all its forms reaches I think this is very interesting. [TS]

00:10:28   I assure you I don't I think you have celebrity issues that's I assure you I do I show you that no celebrities [TS]

00:10:37   or important people can achieve anything that I create. [TS]

00:10:39   Can we move on now to the White House followup slaking of the president so it can if you can click the link that is in [TS]

00:10:46   the show notes. [TS]

00:10:47   Someone on the Reddit pointed out with something I did not know that the resolute desk is not the only White House task [TS]

00:10:56   you might you might know this I guess because you're a big white house nerd [TS]

00:11:00   but I was interested to discover that there are six desks that have been used by presidents in the Oval Office [TS]

00:11:07   and of course Wikipedia conveniently has a link. [TS]

00:11:10   I mean he has a list of all the different desks and yes the resolute desk is the one that's used most recently [TS]

00:11:17   and the C. and O. Desk was used at least I was just used by George H.W. Bush. Nobody's used it since then. [TS]

00:11:26   So only only one term for the C. and O. [TS]

00:11:28   Desk but as the resolute desk there's the Wilson desk at the Johnson desk and there is the Teddy Roosevelt desk [TS]

00:11:36   and the Hoover desk looks like and have pictures of all of them. It's interesting to see. [TS]

00:11:40   Yeah I have to say I do I said of the last forecast that I like you know I like my White House trivia since sort of [TS]

00:11:46   since saying that and delving into a few of these things I realized I know nothing at all [TS]

00:11:50   but I have a lot I have a lot of Wikipedia rabbit holes to go down over the next few weeks before I can. [TS]

00:11:57   Yeah there are we could be just goes on. [TS]

00:12:00   Forever it's pretty interesting isn't it writing about these desks [TS]

00:12:03   and like a lot of the Oval Office fire the first of office constructed in one nine hundred nine rebuilt after one [TS]

00:12:12   hundred twenty nine fire [TS]

00:12:13   and demolished one nine hundred thirty three current oval office completed in one nine hundred thirty four. [TS]

00:12:19   See that picture of the Theodore Roosevelt desk in the Taft Oval Office. Yes Gosh that Oval Office doesn't. [TS]

00:12:28   It's pretty crappy doesn't it looks it looks like a very powerful grandma's office I think is the way I would describe [TS]

00:12:38   it it looks like a Mexican Mobley and seventy's hotel [TS]

00:12:42   or something you know it looks very grandmotherly builder doesn't just drawers everywhere doesn't keep in those drawers [TS]

00:12:49   that's I would like to know. Yes we put these pod cast play next episode Hello into them. Yes that's exactly right. [TS]

00:12:56   That's leisure to realize of course. Anyway we'll put that link in the show and so other people. [TS]

00:13:01   We can now go and have a look. They'll probably want to go have a look now. [TS]

00:13:06   Just to put themselves out of their misery of listening to this say I have one final point about this. [TS]

00:13:11   Yeah which I was relieved to see this because I thought Oh if I ever do find myself as president I can just get my own [TS]

00:13:19   desk right then and there can be the great desk that future presidents will all want to use because it's awesome [TS]

00:13:24   and functional [TS]

00:13:26   but I don't have to use you know the traditional president's desk it looks like if you want to you can just you can [TS]

00:13:31   just say now I'm going to get a new desk like George H.W. [TS]

00:13:33   Bush did so what would the greatest health that you know could have any special features that the others don't have. [TS]

00:13:39   Can you describe what the gray desk would be like your dream your fantasy desk What's your fantasy desk look like. [TS]

00:13:47   I wouldn't want any drawers that's for sure. [TS]

00:13:49   I know now that I don't want any drawers of the desk I'm sitting at right now doesn't have any drawers [TS]

00:13:55   when he drives for. Where do you put like pens and and have. Clips paper what papers do I have to clip in this office. [TS]

00:14:04   Where do you put your own i Phones that I have a like a electronics drawer that my wife and I have in the bedroom [TS]

00:14:11   and you do have a draw. Yeah but but do I need that in my office. [TS]

00:14:16   Like if I'm the president do I need to keep my old i Phone five I need to have this juncture [TS]

00:14:21   or in my office at all times now of course not. Where do you put your ISP a case I don't I don't have any U.S.B. [TS]

00:14:27   Keys anymore I used to speak used to not not anymore. No need for those things. [TS]

00:14:32   Where do you put your local post where you can ask me just about every office supply you can possibly look into my [TS]

00:14:38   driveway before you double a chase where do you put I don't know you text implying I have neither posted notes [TS]

00:14:46   or three decks of playing cards. [TS]

00:14:48   What are you doing with three decks of playing cards in your office within arm's reach none the less. [TS]

00:14:53   What is the circumstance where you're sitting there thinking you know what I need not one not two [TS]

00:14:57   but three decks of playing cards and I need them so acceptable and I have to stand up to get them into number five [TS]

00:15:06   and you find that soon enough my friend. [TS]

00:15:08   OK so say no draws in the fantasy desk so it's just basically a plank of wood between two like Trestles. [TS]

00:15:15   Yes I think sitting at the desk I'm sitting at right now is just flat surface. No drawers it goes down. [TS]

00:15:23   Yeah that's all it is. That's all it needs to be. [TS]

00:15:25   I would also want to be able to be a standing desk which is something I'm looking into for my current office now that I [TS]

00:15:30   haven't set up yet but I used to have a standing desk I don't anymore [TS]

00:15:34   and that is something I would like to get at some point so I could I could have I could have the very first [TS]

00:15:38   presidential desk that you could press a button and it would convert into a standing desk. [TS]

00:15:42   Now be good little treadmill underneath that I don't think you really buy into this kind of traditional fin thickness [TS]

00:15:48   of the White House [TS]

00:15:50   but this is everything becomes traditional telling you future presidents that they would say was a standing desk with a [TS]

00:15:55   treadmill is awesome and they'd start using it and then in a hundred years it be traditional. [TS]

00:16:00   Now that's at the time traditions work somebody has to start the new ones. [TS]

00:16:04   Your a desk is no where near is as impressive as I'd hoped [TS]

00:16:07   but you can tell me that little idea is to have like little cable holders and U.S.B. [TS]

00:16:12   Things in here and it would have like you know. [TS]

00:16:15   And I what about secret compartments for maps [TS]

00:16:17   and things like that I like that thing where you can put your secret maps you know where do I keep my secret maps now I [TS]

00:16:29   don't even know that it's somewhere in the house I guess you probably don't even have secret maps other than that I [TS]

00:16:35   don't have secret mouse where do you keep your you have your secret maps or in the cloud. [TS]

00:16:41   Any hopes that I don't want to keep I keep saying the microphone I'm doing terrible today. [TS]

00:16:47   I don't think I don't think I have going to the design suggestion of your fantasy desk it involves microphone placement [TS]

00:16:52   you know that could be but I need something coming down from the ceiling maybe for the net for that [TS]

00:16:55   and then to the next place. Anyway if you became president would we keep doing the podcast. [TS]

00:17:02   Yeah I like doing the podcast. [TS]

00:17:03   Like you know that the Orson there it's all it's all about opportunity cost you know everything is in relation to every [TS]

00:17:10   other potential thing that you could be doing but I like doing the podcast. [TS]

00:17:13   Would you still be willing to do the podcast with me if I was present Yeah I would be also had even more fun because [TS]

00:17:18   you'd be able to tell me about your secret maps. [TS]

00:17:20   Yes Then you could ask me about things that I've broken in though in the Oval Office to hear if you wanted to ask the [TS]

00:17:25   actual present So yeah there we go. [TS]

00:17:27   But I don't think you keep going [TS]

00:17:28   and I think if he became president he probably does snuff me if I became I mean again I would certainly just resign [TS]

00:17:34   immediately if I found myself as present for some reason I forget this is a terrible job anyway [TS]

00:17:40   and I wouldn't be afraid to be very mean. Now right. [TS]

00:17:43   OK Well we got next to McDonalds I thought this would be something for you too. [TS]

00:17:49   I saw that I clicked on the link before you even told me about it that's how excited I was [TS]

00:17:52   when I saw McDonald's in the show next to the one you want describe what this is because this screams to me Brady Haran. [TS]

00:17:59   Well that was it. [TS]

00:18:00   It's this website called Hack of the many men in this link to the secret McDonald's menu and you click on it [TS]

00:18:07   and it's just got this list of things you can buy McDonald's that you don't know about life because and things [TS]

00:18:14   and they also a lot of them seem like sort of extreme things that you would do that you'd see on like you know those [TS]

00:18:20   extreme ating You Tube channels and things like that. [TS]

00:18:25   But I really I think some of them aren't real I would like to issue a child's listeners So what what what I'm looking [TS]

00:18:31   at right now is a picture of something called the mic at ten thirty five which apparently is a brunch sandwich item [TS]

00:18:39   that McDonald's makes during their brief changeover window from the breakfast menu to the lunch menu [TS]

00:18:45   and it basically looks like an Egg McMuffin that is also with two additional patties of beef [TS]

00:18:53   and cheese in between every layer and I say it's the most difficult to kind of on the secret menu. [TS]

00:18:58   Yes and it looks both revolting and delicious. Take my initial reaction was that horrifying and then I found it. [TS]

00:19:12   It whispers to me through the screen of you know this could be quite good. [TS]

00:19:17   That should be the main picture on the Wikipedia page for heart attack. [TS]

00:19:21   It really should be [TS]

00:19:24   but just as as moments ago we have called for Congressman to send us photographs of them listening to hello internet on [TS]

00:19:32   the congressional floor. [TS]

00:19:34   Yeah I was well I would love on Twitter if people can send us if they are able to acquire if it is real if they are [TS]

00:19:41   able to acquire a mic. Ten thirty five and send us a picture of them eating it and listening to hello internet. [TS]

00:19:47   I would like to see this. I don't I guess. [TS]

00:19:53   Here's the thing if people consent to this picture it's impressive either way. [TS]

00:19:57   If they're able to if it's not real and they've able and they were able. [TS]

00:20:00   You can structure their own version of the MC ten thirty five that is also impressive. [TS]

00:20:04   I think some of these are just because it was one he called them a gang bang which I didn't think could be Rio [TS]

00:20:09   and then I clicked on it and it basically says although you know this one and this one and put them together. [TS]

00:20:14   When one can do that right it's not secret menu that's just come down the ramp. [TS]

00:20:18   Yeah that's just different there but there are there are restaurants that genuinely do the secret menu thing [TS]

00:20:23   and I don't like like the Starbucks one that is real but I tried once. [TS]

00:20:26   Is the the short drink size I don't know if you're aware of this [TS]

00:20:30   but no less so which I'm glad to know that it's just because it makes the whole Starbucks [TS]

00:20:35   when you make way more sense [TS]

00:20:36   but the sizes are it's the small is a tall I can't I can't I can't do this because it's tall. [TS]

00:20:47   Gunday Venti is small medium large and apparently I've never seen them here [TS]

00:20:54   but in America you can get a disgustingly large trend which is even bigger than the venti like thirty eight fluid [TS]

00:21:00   ounces of milk. [TS]

00:21:02   Apparently America America [TS]

00:21:05   but Starbucks has a secret item which is called the short which is about half the size of the TAL which makes the name [TS]

00:21:14   tall suddenly make a lot more sense because to use tall as the shortest one [TS]

00:21:18   or two used to use tall as the smallest one is crazy town. [TS]

00:21:23   But if you know that they have a smaller one that is called the short and then there's the tall [TS]

00:21:28   and then there's the granddaddy invent venti that makes a lot more sense. That makes way more sense. [TS]

00:21:33   So I ordered it once just to see if it was real because I heard about it on the Internet [TS]

00:21:36   and they were slightly confused at Starbucks with and the manager came over [TS]

00:21:40   and said Oh no no this guy he did the secret handshake you know and he winked at me come out the back. [TS]

00:21:45   Yeah that's exactly right and there was a there was a little tall sized cup. [TS]

00:21:51   So anyway it's fun to know the secret menus exists [TS]

00:21:54   but so I would not disbelieve the notion that a person could get a make ten thirty five and I want to see. [TS]

00:22:00   If people can do it if it's real. Hello Internet. [TS]

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00:22:51   need which is something I definitely see with other companies who try to sell you a whole bunch of bells [TS]

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00:23:00   The second thing that I love is that the stuff that should just come with the Web site. Like who is privacy. [TS]

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00:23:08   Now you may not know this if you never purchased a website before but [TS]

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00:23:16   and your address. [TS]

00:23:17   Now if say you don't want your name in your address public on the whole internet for anybody who looks at that website [TS]

00:23:23   most registrars make you pay more money for that but not hover. [TS]

00:23:27   It's just free you know you keep your information private and it's there by default. [TS]

00:23:31   It's really a nice touch and shows that they're a great company. [TS]

00:23:35   So how much do I like hover I like them enough to have a thirty four domain names registered there. [TS]

00:23:41   Yes that's right thirty four domain names. [TS]

00:23:43   I might have a little bit of a domain name problem [TS]

00:23:45   but every time I get some crazy idea for some web site like save the Union Jack dot com which we mentioned on a [TS]

00:23:51   previous show I register it on hover just in case I ever want to do something with that. [TS]

00:23:56   If you have an idea for a web site you might want to run a hover is the place to. [TS]

00:24:00   We register it they make it as simple and easy as possible. [TS]

00:24:03   They have a support team that is always available in case you need a hand [TS]

00:24:06   and they have what they call their no wait no hold no transfer or phone service so [TS]

00:24:11   when you call a real live human being is there ready to help you and if you're like me [TS]

00:24:17   and don't exactly like making phone calls. [TS]

00:24:20   They also have online tutorials [TS]

00:24:22   and e-mail support which is what I have used on the occasions I've had to ask them questions and it's been very good. [TS]

00:24:28   Now the other thing about however is that they actually listen to the show [TS]

00:24:31   and they like to do things with the promo codes that you use so if you're going to register a domain name go to hover [TS]

00:24:37   dot com and you can get ten percent off your first purchase. [TS]

00:24:41   But and this is the promo code they're making me say you have to use freebooting at checkout. Yes that's right. [TS]

00:24:48   The promo code to get ten percent off is free booting. It's not another word that I might want it to be. [TS]

00:24:54   But you know that that's over now that's done. So rebooting is what it's going to be ten percent off at hover. [TS]

00:25:01   I'd like to thank cover for trying out our show to sponsor [TS]

00:25:04   and you should go check them out if you're thinking of registering any domain name. [TS]

00:25:07   And don't forget to use the promo code freebooting. So speaking of coffee. Yeah we have to follow up on a few. [TS]

00:25:17   Well it's one thing to do. [TS]

00:25:19   This was no this was this was I blame myself for this and I will explain myself if the opportunity arises [TS]

00:25:26   but you told the story last episode about you burning your hand in a tragic incident [TS]

00:25:33   and people who got an honor like this not Frederick they will anyway [TS]

00:25:37   but it all centered around the fact you were microwaving your coffee in the morning when things went wrong. [TS]

00:25:43   And while many people were sympathetic [TS]

00:25:45   and wished you the best with your injury more people will want to know what the heck you were doing. [TS]

00:25:52   Microwaving coffee. Like someone who loves coffee as much as you purport. Why would you microwave coffee. [TS]

00:26:00   That seems a very sort of uncouth way to make your coffee and I have to say I probably would have asked you about it [TS]

00:26:07   and I should have asked you about it but [TS]

00:26:09   but I part of the thing was I didn't actually process that you were microwaving the whole coffee I just ashamed that [TS]

00:26:16   was how you boil your water or something like that but it seems you actually microwaving the whole coffee [TS]

00:26:21   and everything. Yes and it was the whole coffee that went to my hand. [TS]

00:26:25   Well obviously you have to explain this because this is a this is quite a shock. [TS]

00:26:30   I don't understand why this is such a shock but I bet I got a boy did I hear about it from people about the coffee [TS]

00:26:36   and it did not occur to me that this would be a point that people would find contentious. [TS]

00:26:40   So I don't know and even I do. [TS]

00:26:42   Do you want to hear something even something interesting in my entire life I've never had a cup of coffee. [TS]

00:26:50   Well I've never had a coffee in my life really and even I think it's crazy that you microwave your coffee. [TS]

00:26:58   You've never had a cup of coffee. None not ever know I have a one up or how how is this how is this come to pass. [TS]

00:27:07   Well I intensely dislike the smell and taste of coffee. [TS]

00:27:12   OK but if you've tasted it and I've touched it to my tongue just to be sure that the taste is as bad as the smell [TS]

00:27:19   and like if I taste things that a coffee flavored by mistake like her coffee sweet [TS]

00:27:23   or cough that ingrowing that's gross coffee ice cream is disgusting. [TS]

00:27:27   Anything coffee anything coffee like I don't knock [TS]

00:27:30   and I just you know I I really like if someone is in my car with a coffee I quite dislike that [TS]

00:27:37   but that smell of coffee in my car for an hour [TS]

00:27:39   or two afterwards this is very interesting you say you don't like the smell. [TS]

00:27:44   Yeah I do know I can I think you have some kind of biological aversion to coffee then because you almost everyone I [TS]

00:27:51   know likes the smell but then doesn't like the taste of coffee. Right right. [TS]

00:27:56   It seems like the universal agreement that coffee smells better than it tastes. [TS]

00:28:00   Which even coffee people will agree on the coffee smells better than it is but you don't think it's all good at all. [TS]

00:28:06   Well not unlike the smell I get but what I do I do appreciate that people love it and I love [TS]

00:28:12   and I like that people take it really seriously and get connoisseur about it and I really respect that and I can [TS]

00:28:18   and I like the idea of coffee. [TS]

00:28:20   I wish I liked coffee because I love the idea of having a coffee in the morning and but I just dislike it too much [TS]

00:28:27   but I feel like this is really sad for you but your whole morning experience is greatly diminished. [TS]

00:28:33   It's like you don't like the smell of flowers or something. [TS]

00:28:37   I don't I can't think of an analogy here [TS]

00:28:39   but just like someone told me that that flowers smell terrible to them just all flowers I would think oh that's that's [TS]

00:28:45   very sad for you and this is how I feel about the coffee smell. [TS]

00:28:49   I'm sorry Brady was through like this about millions of things about you. [TS]

00:28:52   Every time we talk something else comes up that makes me feel sorry for you. [TS]

00:28:57   If we let you go through your life missing out on all these cool things I'll go without my coffee. [TS]

00:29:04   And about every person. But once you know and I'm happy to know having coffee. [TS]

00:29:11   But but I have my coffee and I've seen people make coffee [TS]

00:29:15   and I know I know a fair bit about coffee just from living on planet earth right. [TS]

00:29:20   And one thing I know is that a good cup of coffee is not made in the microwave. Let's back up here. [TS]

00:29:27   There was some confusion with the way I was telling the story where Sylvia should begin the beginning how I came across [TS]

00:29:32   coffee a very good place to Paris. [TS]

00:29:34   OK This story starts with the woman who would become my wife who's now my wife who is a total drug pusher [TS]

00:29:42   when it comes to coffee. [TS]

00:29:44   It's like she's getting a cut from the caffeine [TS]

00:29:47   and coffee bean industries because she pushes coffee on absolutely everyone she comes in contact who doesn't already [TS]

00:29:55   drink coffee I could be had nemesis. Yeah you very. [TS]

00:30:00   Well maybe and I was one of her early case projects because this is now ten years ago. [TS]

00:30:08   I guess I was just trying to ballpark it. [TS]

00:30:11   I don't really drink coffee and this is this is before I was in the professional world working as a teacher [TS]

00:30:16   and you know any of this is just an idiot you know hanging out in life not really doing anything in particular [TS]

00:30:23   but so my wife and I were traveling in America and we were in Las Vegas [TS]

00:30:29   and she was starting her Oh you need do you need to get on coffee thing here and I was opposed to it I like the smell. [TS]

00:30:36   I didn't like the taste [TS]

00:30:38   but she used what is the gateway drug for very many people to getting into coffee which is Starbucks Frappuccino those [TS]

00:30:46   which are basically ice cream shakes there's a Starbucks that is in the Luxor Hotel which was where we were staying the [TS]

00:30:51   big pyramid one and so I had a Java Chip Frappuccino there and this was the gateway drug. [TS]

00:30:56   This isn't bad and is like little chunks of of coffee beans in there. [TS]

00:31:00   And from this is my of my wife kind of got me hooked on those and then eventually transitioned me into coffee [TS]

00:31:07   and so I've gone through like a whole bunch of phases [TS]

00:31:10   and I'm I'm in a new phase now I want to like lattes for a while I did drink instant coffee [TS]

00:31:15   when I was a teacher which people find absolutely horrifying. But you gotta do what you gotta do. [TS]

00:31:19   You need coffee all day long and need it right away and you can't possibly have like roasting stuff in a school. [TS]

00:31:25   But yes I drank lattes and now I am drinking actual coffee coffee though. If we go into our kitchen. [TS]

00:31:33   I was looking at it today and there are I think depending on how you want to count it four [TS]

00:31:37   or five pieces of equipment that are related to coffee production that are there. So we have a drip coffee pot. [TS]

00:31:44   We have a bird grinder. [TS]

00:31:46   My wife also has one of those machines that has the little capsules that you put the capsule in [TS]

00:31:50   and it makes the coffee you know about the piano that you know I forget the name for them. [TS]

00:31:54   I can remember people will now. They always make me think I have forseen Robocop too. I believe not. [TS]

00:32:03   There's a drug in that movie which is sold in little capsules. [TS]

00:32:06   It's called nuke [TS]

00:32:08   and every time I see the little coffee capsule something about it reminds me of the new drug that everybody is buying [TS]

00:32:13   in tiny little capsules and Robocop too. [TS]

00:32:16   Anyway to add to your moving list because we have a whole lot like all this coffee paraphernalia [TS]

00:32:20   and now I used to have like the routine was down very well [TS]

00:32:24   but then my wife introduced more equipment as like all the coffee routine has to change. [TS]

00:32:27   She introduces each piece very slowly because she knows I need to adapt over long periods of time when joking [TS]

00:32:33   when you said you're going to start at the very beginning right at the end of editing as well [TS]

00:32:39   but don't you think you'll be laughing I'm sure all these filthy connoisseurs of the gang know you stole it was the [TS]

00:32:46   bonus D.V.D. I want to know everything. [TS]

00:32:49   But yes so now a lot of times I make coffee I find myself in the position that we have these this like vacuum container [TS]

00:32:54   for the beans and then I put it through the burr grinder and particularly the burr grinder because it's really loud [TS]

00:32:59   and I feel like first thing in like at six in the morning I'm trying to make a cup of coffee I can't deal with the burr [TS]

00:33:03   grinder that early but apparently now I have to use it for making coffee and the coffee machine [TS]

00:33:09   and we have like a pot of coffee so we make actual real coffee and [TS]

00:33:14   when the hen story occurred last time this is where people do get slightly horrified that we've got I've gone through [TS]

00:33:21   the process of making real coffee and I had drank real coffee earlier in the day [TS]

00:33:26   and then I was coming to a pot of coffee that was sitting there that I need to heat up because it had just been sitting [TS]

00:33:33   there for a while so you could've just said I was really hating nice coffee in the microwave. [TS]

00:33:38   You probably didn't need the lox or part of the story that all of us all of the story it was absolutely necessary [TS]

00:33:44   and if I don't I love the data here I think do you think that will cut out all of us who doesn't think What if I want [TS]

00:33:53   to I want people to know how hard you went. Story I don't want people to think and you just glossed over mystical. [TS]

00:34:00   No I want people to know that you agonized over this [TS]

00:34:02   and tell your life story leading up to the moment you reheated some coffee. [TS]

00:34:07   I also feel that the length of that story was proportional to the number of emails I received horrify people worried [TS]

00:34:14   that I had made instant coffee and buy things I didn't think you had made instant coffee. [TS]

00:34:20   I still think microwaving it just doesn't seem right to me it seems. It still seems wrong. [TS]

00:34:27   There's another other point to this which is that for me coffee is a very important part of my work flow [TS]

00:34:35   and the routine of working and just kind of getting stuff done [TS]

00:34:38   and precisely because of that slightly working against my wife a little bit. [TS]

00:34:43   I have resisted becoming a very fussy coffee person I don't want to get too fussy about the coffees because I feel I [TS]

00:34:51   also need to be able to drink coffee anywhere in the world [TS]

00:34:56   and so I have a threshold which is basically Starbucks filtered coffee I need to be able to drink that [TS]

00:35:03   and I can't get fussy to the point where I become one of these people who won't drink Starbucks filter coffee. [TS]

00:35:10   If I reach that stage then I'm really in trouble. [TS]

00:35:13   So I intentionally kind of don't get super into coffee even though people might think I would be the kind of person who [TS]

00:35:20   would be. [TS]

00:35:21   Well I'm surprised you need coffee at all because you like everything [TS]

00:35:27   and I'll bet you're all about kind of you know redundancies and safety and mechanisms and things [TS]

00:35:33   and you know making sure everything is safe and works [TS]

00:35:38   and making yourself dependant on a drug seems to go against the C G P guy I know who would know who would never want [TS]

00:35:46   him to suffer to be dependent on anything. [TS]

00:35:48   You know you're all about you're all about [TS]

00:35:50   and you know you know what you're like you know you don't want to blow ya mind and on one platform [TS]

00:35:55   or one thing in this and one thing and here you are just making yourself a slave to this drink. You can't work there. [TS]

00:36:01   Yes this is true I agree that is that the inferi me but everybody has vices. This is this is my vice. [TS]

00:36:08   This is my somewhat addictive behavior is the coffee I got [TS]

00:36:12   but I totally acknowledge that in a perfect world I wouldn't be drinking coffee but I just really like it [TS]

00:36:18   and I just think it also makes the whole work routine just kind of nicer in a way that that's hard to quantify. [TS]

00:36:26   Even if I am I will admit totally addicted to coffee [TS]

00:36:30   and a day of mourning where something goes wrong with the coffee production is really bad I mean luckily by the time [TS]

00:36:37   that that coffee story occurred from last time I had already ingested you know one cup of coffee so things were great [TS]

00:36:42   but it would have really been a disastrous day if that was opposed to my first cup of coffee [TS]

00:36:47   and then I had to go to the hospital without any. I probably would've stopped at Starbucks on my way. [TS]

00:36:52   Actually I'm pretty sure I would have done that I would've stopped at Starbucks on the way it was [TS]

00:36:56   and I need a filter coffee to go and I'm going to sit in a NE [TS]

00:37:00   and hold a Starbucks in one hand as I tell the doctor that I burn my other hand with coffee that's all I would have [TS]

00:37:06   done. That's how that would work. [TS]

00:37:08   When you tell the doctor what happened you know I just sort of superheating thing what did they say by the way they [TS]

00:37:13   like say oh yeah happens all the time or oh you poor thing [TS]

00:37:16   or you really should be more careful now they do just seem totally nonplussed like this happens all the time you know I [TS]

00:37:25   mean this is the way it does is the way it is with doctors that we've been there a couple times before with relatively [TS]

00:37:30   serious stuff and then I was like you know we see twenty of these a day. [TS]

00:37:34   You know very well it is a horrifying moment in our lives the terrifying to the guy [TS]

00:37:38   or whatever you know the year my third and is not yet lunch but that's what that was like for doctors to do anyway. [TS]

00:37:45   Coffee in need to be able to drink it anywhere in the world I don't want to get too fussy about it. [TS]

00:37:49   But unfortunately I do recognize how good good coffee can be which is something I kind of tried to avoid for a while [TS]

00:37:57   but now I can be like oh yeah that's you know Jamaican Blue. [TS]

00:38:00   We were Kona coffee can definitely taste the difference especially now I don't drink coffee with sugar in it [TS]

00:38:06   or anything so I can really notice [TS]

00:38:07   and I think we are getting a little too close to being a coffee snob because to have the good stuff. Yeah yeah. [TS]

00:38:16   Cracking through the follow up here are we know we're not this is you know when when [TS]

00:38:22   when a follow up item involves you telling the story of how your wife introduced you to coffee you know we're in [TS]

00:38:26   trouble [TS]

00:38:27   and now we have to you know we have to do if we have to eventually get the You Tube thing which you teased last time [TS]

00:38:34   and so now we have to like rush through stuff because we're chained to that because of you saying we're going to do it [TS]

00:38:39   next time so we have to do when do we do what we say we're going to do. [TS]

00:38:42   We tell people we were going to review black marijuana episode and then we just didn't we didn't want to have to. [TS]

00:38:47   Yeah and that wasn't good either. That wasn't good either. [TS]

00:38:50   People were angry people didn't like it I didn't get I didn't hear a lot of anger on that one. [TS]

00:38:56   Each each angry comment burns deep. [TS]

00:38:58   When people are expecting something so it will skip over that little skip over one what this next thing very minor OK [TS]

00:39:06   so I have something I have something exciting for you. [TS]

00:39:08   Yeah I have a plane crash corner you can see plane crash cause I am doing plane crash corner. That's my thing. [TS]

00:39:17   Come up with the one point I found something for plane crash corner and I want to bring it up. [TS]

00:39:23   Yes I thought you'd be excited and disappointed OK fine we won't do plane crash corner now. [TS]

00:39:29   Come on give me what you find. No I know I know I thought you'd be really happy and you're not really happy. [TS]

00:39:36   Disappointed I was joking I am happy. [TS]

00:39:40   Although I did say we were going to do a plane crash going this way because we went so hard last week that I felt bad [TS]

00:39:45   for all those people who listen to us on flights. Yeah we did we did go a little too hard. [TS]

00:39:50   You made my wife all nervous you know we have we have some flights coming up shouldn't listen to the plane crash corner. [TS]

00:39:58   I'm not proud of part of that makes me. [TS]

00:40:00   If you're a bad part of me feels a little bit warm that your wife was listening to plane crash going to it's like I'm [TS]

00:40:05   sharing the love. Yeah she listens to the podcast. She was listening to it literally right before I was recording this. [TS]

00:40:11   I display my life bits of the podcast that I think she might like and she get angry [TS]

00:40:15   when I play them so that doesn't go over well you know something will happen. [TS]

00:40:20   Oh you should listen to part of the podcast we talked about that she's like you know and then I fly [TS]

00:40:24   and she's like you know what's going on for the whole episode even plane crash. [TS]

00:40:30   Yes she gets she feels the opposite the too far apart and she gets on my case keeps going to going to make an episode. [TS]

00:40:37   She's really she really wants them so she can talk to you any time she wants she can she can do a hello internet live [TS]

00:40:43   she can [TS]

00:40:44   but she also as we were just discussing before I go on the microphone now she often finds herself sympathizing with [TS]

00:40:51   Brady and listening to I think she enjoys [TS]

00:40:55   or has sympathy for listening to you sometimes deal with me in particularly like oh yeah I know where it is really [TS]

00:41:04   frustrating. [TS]

00:41:04   Brady's frustrated with you here I would be frustrated with you there as well [TS]

00:41:07   and I think I think that's why she likes she feels my pain. Come on then. [TS]

00:41:11   Gray's plane crash going to have any no no this is this is this is just follow the plane crash corner is still yours. [TS]

00:41:18   My plane crash corner this is probably the only time we might see this park has for a hundred years [TS]

00:41:23   and I will never have anything to bring up in plane crash corner. [TS]

00:41:26   But I'll send it to you on a message [TS]

00:41:29   and now where you've been holding this back tell you this is like a little Christmas present. [TS]

00:41:34   Yeah it kind of is not really it this is the kind of plane crash corner that I would send you [TS]

00:41:40   when you see it you'll see what I mean OK it's come to my phone and I can hear it [TS]

00:41:45   and we can fix this now it will come to my computer but like in about five minutes to sum up for I K. [TS]

00:41:55   You have sent me a clip of Barry on solo. [TS]

00:42:00   Well I've got to push if you have sent me a posher Yes this is my plane crash corner is this pie chart which seems to [TS]

00:42:11   show I'm a shaming that's fatalities and that yes I found this on the beautiful sub Reddit [TS]

00:42:20   and I thought this was interesting. [TS]

00:42:21   This is all aircraft fatalities in two thousand and fourteen [TS]

00:42:27   and the thing I think is really interesting about this is the two Malaysian Airline flights which you have spoken about [TS]

00:42:33   endlessly endlessly on plane crash corner. [TS]

00:42:38   Those two flights made up forty four percent of all of the plane crash fatalities in all of twenty four teams. [TS]

00:42:46   Well that just justifies the amount of time I gave Mom plane crash going to does it I'm not sure that it does. [TS]

00:42:53   Perhaps it does I think that's going to still seem a little long to me sometimes. [TS]

00:42:56   However I don't even want to do it this way you can you're doing it so I don't know what you're talking about [TS]

00:43:02   but I'm I'm bringing it up because I feel like this is this pie chart is a nice a nice reminder [TS]

00:43:10   and visual reminder of how unsafe airline travel actually is that by the way that thing just came through on my [TS]

00:43:16   computer now. That's the leg I'm dealing with here. Great thank you for that. [TS]

00:43:20   I'm glad you don't have right now thank you. I'm just you know it. [TS]

00:43:24   If we don't have to pay you a professional I want you know people should know how this podcast unfolds there's not [TS]

00:43:29   there's not a vanishing this man this is how it is. [TS]

00:43:32   Also know if we have any if we have any problems with the perception of this park as it is it is too professional if [TS]

00:43:38   you are right. [TS]

00:43:39   Good to make sure that people can hear all of the little things that we deal with when you [TS]

00:43:43   when trying to talk to each other over computers [TS]

00:43:47   when you really struggle like we have to insert all these problems falsely Otherwise we are just too damn professional. [TS]

00:43:53   Yes that's that is not all the case your part your part you are going to say bye. [TS]

00:44:00   A plane crashes and no big deal and flying is very safe and so have a great perk [TS]

00:44:06   but not the last part no not the group hug [TS]

00:44:07   but the rest of it is because it's a bit like eleven hundred twelve hundred feet Televisa over the course of twenty [TS]

00:44:12   fourteen and then the two Malaysian flights together are about five hundred [TS]

00:44:17   and forty on one pool as well on board the twenty now when we're recording this. [TS]

00:44:22   And [TS]

00:44:23   when people listen to this podcast I will have been on three long haul flights so it's not like I'm you know cowering [TS]

00:44:32   from flying as a result of my interest in plane crashes and I agree it's life. [TS]

00:44:36   I don't I know that you are not cow cowering but I I like to look at this point try [TS]

00:44:40   and reassure myself for the flights that I have planned in the future is a right thing travel relatively safe. [TS]

00:44:47   Do I talk about where you're going I don't even remember where you're going. [TS]

00:44:51   I'm going to buy for a holiday and then I'm going to America you're in America. [TS]

00:44:58   Can America more number far live are you going to San Francisco. I am going to Berkeley. [TS]

00:45:04   Right right the spiritual home of number file. [TS]

00:45:07   Yet if I if one of those planes crashes and I don't come out the other side. Right. We used to put this podcast up. [TS]

00:45:17   Oh yeah yeah you know well I mean now that you've said this I'm not sure I want you to do I mean enough of this up in [TS]

00:45:25   case you die we should talk about this at some point. [TS]

00:45:29   What's our policy on the podcast if one of us dies when you mean what would he mean with what are we discussing here. [TS]

00:45:35   Well look like we're recording this right. What if one of us dies. [TS]

00:45:39   You know before because we're recording this one quite far in advance. Yes that's true. [TS]

00:45:43   Your listeners aren't aware we're recording is what like two days after we put up the other one. [TS]

00:45:47   Yeah right precisely because you're going to be flying. [TS]

00:45:49   Yes all over the world so we need to have like an agreement in place if one of us does what happens with the podcast [TS]

00:45:56   like the last one record it is really easy because. If I die well I have all the files. [TS]

00:46:02   Now another of Korea hijack I could I could put out a last recording because you've got such a cult following [TS]

00:46:09   but that could actually be worth something couldn't grace your Grace tragic last recording to have a cult following. [TS]

00:46:16   That's a salary I could make money out of it. [TS]

00:46:20   OK look if you sell it you have to give my share of the proceeds to my wife if I died and I care and if my wife [TS]

00:46:31   and I have died on a plane together then my family [TS]

00:46:36   and I think that's pushing it a bit I think if you've both gone I can probably get the praise AIDS I think about your [TS]

00:46:43   family I don't know I guess it depends how much I make from it. [TS]

00:46:48   OK I guess I did like the sound your parents because I like may say I'll give them your half right. [TS]

00:46:54   Right but it never really occurred to me but if you had if you die between or between the packets must go up or not. [TS]

00:47:03   You don't want me to put up is that what you tell me is that what you're saying you don't want your final word Actually [TS]

00:47:06   now that we're discussing [TS]

00:47:08   and now that we're discussing it seem have the very fact that we're discussing it is the reason that it should go up. [TS]

00:47:15   Like how creepy will this be. People be so creeped out. What do you think that's a good that's not a good thing. [TS]

00:47:20   Yes well I will again remind you that at some point. [TS]

00:47:24   Well probably both of us will be dead and people in the future might be listening. [TS]

00:47:29   So it's creepy to think about [TS]

00:47:30   and I think yeah let's not let's not let's not talk about the fact that you're going to die at some point for the [TS]

00:47:38   people because you know this is this moment right now we're alive the recording it won't be someday someone might be [TS]

00:47:44   listening. P.-P. Future people and we are going to put it up if you die on the plane. That's fine it's all good. [TS]

00:47:52   But we've already sold the advertising space. Speaking of which. [TS]

00:48:00   Would like to thank Lynda dot com for their support of this podcast. [TS]

00:48:03   Learn something new at Lynda with a free ten day trial. That's Linda L Y N D K with Y. [TS]

00:48:11   Not my Lynda dot com is used by millions of people around the world [TS]

00:48:15   and has over three thousand courses on topics like web development photography visual design business [TS]

00:48:21   and of course software trading on things like XO Wordpress Photoshop you name it Linda. Probably got up. [TS]

00:48:28   It's courses are taught by experts and new ones are being added to the site every week. [TS]

00:48:33   Now you can sign on for a free ten day trial today. Go to Lynda dot com slash hello internet. [TS]

00:48:39   You get unlimited access to every course they've got [TS]

00:48:42   and you can watch these on your tablet your i Phone Android on the computer of course. [TS]

00:48:47   My first experience with Linda was actually sitting next to a friend at an ad agency in London [TS]

00:48:53   and his friend he's a crash or graphic designer an editor [TS]

00:48:56   but he suddenly stumbled over something he didn't know how to do. [TS]

00:49:00   And within seconds he'd found a Lynda video which showed him exactly what he needed. [TS]

00:49:04   He didn't have to sit through like a whole lesson or a course or anything like that. [TS]

00:49:08   He's always straight to that little nugget he needed. [TS]

00:49:11   I think that's one of the really useful things about Linda you might not hear so often that ability just to get those [TS]

00:49:16   little snippets. So even if you think you know plenty of stuff Linda might still be handy. [TS]

00:49:22   As I said sign on for a free ten day trial trial before you buy. [TS]

00:49:27   Lynda dot com slash hello internet and go for a binge on knowledge taking as much as you can [TS]

00:49:33   and if you like them I think there's a chance you will you can of course then sign on for longer. [TS]

00:49:38   Regardless thank you so much for Lynda dot com for their support of our podcast. [TS]

00:49:45   OK here we are at some point we are going to be dead so here we are from beyond the grave. [TS]

00:49:55   And speaking of things that are dark and morbid. Another thing that will have happened. [TS]

00:50:00   Since we recorded right here you will have released the latest Internet animated by a friend of ski jump [TS]

00:50:12   and I did have a sneak preview of it thanks to you because he has sent it to us already. [TS]

00:50:16   Right and I love his work but he certainly looks at things differently. [TS]

00:50:24   I don't understand your dark and more morbid comments I don't see that at all. [TS]

00:50:27   Well no I'm not morbid but he's he does put like a twisted take on things. [TS]

00:50:33   So people you haven't [TS]

00:50:34   and I've never said the reason I bring this up is for people who have never seen these things as animated Codell ski's [TS]

00:50:40   very clever and he takes one or two little sections of the pod cast and creates these animations to them [TS]

00:50:46   and I think five of them are already on our You Tube channel on the hello internet You Tube channel [TS]

00:50:52   and now there will be a six one which is his longest comes and I had a bumper two minutes and it is the longest [TS]

00:50:59   and it has taken him the longest. And when you see it you can definitely see why. [TS]

00:51:03   Yeah he spends a lot of time on this one and I think it came out amazing. [TS]

00:51:07   So anyway if you do like the podcast and you're listening this faster you probably do. [TS]

00:51:13   They're definitely worth a look because Haiti certainly puts things in a new context and and they're good fun. [TS]

00:51:20   Yes they could fan you think they're a good way to introduce people to the podcast. [TS]

00:51:25   This is a perennial problem that we have is and I see it online. [TS]

00:51:30   People talk about the podcast it's always the same that people say Oh I listen to podcasts I really like it [TS]

00:51:35   but it's very hard to explain to somebody else why they should listen to it. [TS]

00:51:40   It's very I mean we have the joke that we dominate the two dudes talking category that does not actually exist [TS]

00:51:48   but it is very hard to say to another person why they might want to listen to this pod cast because it doesn't it [TS]

00:51:54   doesn't fit a topic and you can't say oh it's not about anything in particular. So. [TS]

00:52:00   My my feeling is that [TS]

00:52:01   when people try to introduce somebody else to the pod cast of those dusky animations are probably the best way to do it [TS]

00:52:08   because you can get some sense of of who we are [TS]

00:52:12   and think like oh I like this little animation maybe I'll listen to the whole thing so I think there's like there like [TS]

00:52:18   a nice little movie trailer you know maybe maybe for movie that's boring or and in a different kind of tone [TS]

00:52:30   and context but yeah I get to like a movie director. [TS]

00:52:33   You're so you're saying it's more like oh it's a way of tricking people into listening by promising them that's one [TS]

00:52:38   thing and it's something completely different. It's a way to get them started. [TS]

00:52:41   I think the way to put it but it might be partly a trick. [TS]

00:52:46   He makes as he makes us look way funnier than we actually are you have to act differently [TS]

00:52:50   and he makes us look mildly funny which is quite an achievement. So yeah now you know we're not funny at all. [TS]

00:52:56   We've been talking about our own mortality for the last twenty years basically So the last two days for me have [TS]

00:53:05   actually been dominated by hello internet business. Oh yes yes. You've been very busy. [TS]

00:53:11   I thought I'd tell people a bit about what happens just because not only because nothing else to talk about [TS]

00:53:17   but also it does involve how the Internet and I don't say maybe. [TS]

00:53:23   You have some import people have things to say about it. [TS]

00:53:27   Now it's going to come across as a bit of a humble brag at times just before you all start giving me hash tag humble [TS]

00:53:33   brag. I was letting you know I'm aware of it. [TS]

00:53:35   Well anyway we released a small number of tickets for this event we've been talking about for a month [TS]

00:53:41   or two now where people can come and watch Star Wars. Bristow's who is me and David Prowse who played in Star Wars. [TS]

00:53:53   I bid and won in an auction on the rights to watch Star Wars with David Prowse at a charity event a few months back. [TS]

00:54:00   And it was supposed to just be for me and a handful of friends that I spoke to there and I spoke to David [TS]

00:54:05   and said Can we turn it into this hello internet thing they both agreed because it was a chance to raise more money for [TS]

00:54:11   penguins. [TS]

00:54:13   The pet disease penguin Conservation Fund basically for South African penguins [TS]

00:54:17   but it was still going to be a very small event and it still is going to be a very small event [TS]

00:54:22   and this is what has caused problems because for a while I was going to say for reasons unknown not for reasons unknown. [TS]

00:54:30   Meeting David Prowse or some say a lot people want to come to this event. [TS]

00:54:34   It turns out I didn't realize just how many people wanted to come until a couple of days ago. [TS]

00:54:40   So basically at midday on a Tuesday we released an e-mail address a secret e-mail address to our patriotic supporters [TS]

00:54:51   to get the first half of these tickets [TS]

00:54:54   and the idea was then the next day on the Wednesday we would release another secret e-mail address to everyone to get [TS]

00:55:00   the other half of the tickets. We thought and I still think it was probably the best way we could do it. [TS]

00:55:07   So midday you posted the email address on the Patriot because you know you have the control over that and within. [TS]

00:55:18   Ten seconds. All the tickets were spoken for like like my inbox. [TS]

00:55:25   But people obviously had the email already written with all the things they had to write that was the impressive part [TS]

00:55:30   of people. [TS]

00:55:31   People were preparing in advance for this and as soon as I had the address I press the button so I had their name [TS]

00:55:37   and phone number and data. [TS]

00:55:40   So there were people who had like on the Tuesday there were people who had a mild you know instantaneously within five [TS]

00:55:49   seconds right. Who within getting rejection saying sorry you would taste like. [TS]

00:55:53   Yeah I told you because I put the thing up and you jokingly instant. [TS]

00:56:00   He sent me a message saying no e-mails yet and then not ten seconds later you sent saying we're sold out. [TS]

00:56:10   It felt like we were selling W W D C ticket there's something rotten apple puts up the tickets [TS]

00:56:15   and bam seven seconds they've sold out of the seven second though I wish I mean obviously [TS]

00:56:20   when I was selling thousands that's a problem. [TS]

00:56:22   Yeah but anyway it just seemed it seemed a crazy short amount of time I mean we were released. [TS]

00:56:30   We said we were going to release same address exactly mid day [TS]

00:56:33   and we did to the point where we even got like official the official you know nuclear clock out to make sure it went up [TS]

00:56:38   at midday. I have the atomic clock up on my screen and it's going to hit twelve. Boom. [TS]

00:56:43   I pressed it and like you said ten seconds later we saw that if you looked at my like G. [TS]

00:56:48   Mail account over the Mousehole that date stamped you know twelve so it was like gosh. [TS]

00:56:55   So anyway so I came out you know everyone back and said sorry you've missed out [TS]

00:56:58   but you can have a go in the public you know for the other half an hour and they went even quicker. [TS]

00:57:05   Like if you think if you think those first ones went quickly should I say the second one it was like everyone piled on [TS]

00:57:12   and say we've allocated over the we've allocated more tickets than we were supposed to already so. [TS]

00:57:20   And in no small part because you are a big softy. But anyway let's not go into that. [TS]

00:57:30   If I had been handling this thing I would have handled it more by the book but you are Mister Softee [TS]

00:57:36   and we have we have distributed more tickets and we were thinking originally Doug was not soft. [TS]

00:57:43   I was well yeah well I didn't follow rules I just want everyone to know that I had that I had a strict rule that I did [TS]

00:57:50   have a strict rule in my head my rule was just softer than your oh so it's not like I've done anyone favors [TS]

00:57:56   and I did follow the row and if you missed that you missed out because you know. There was no favoritism. [TS]

00:58:01   We had a couple of friends and people we know who wanted tickets and they you know they were treated the same [TS]

00:58:07   and got rejection you know I was just like everyone else is appropriate [TS]

00:58:09   and so there was no there was no like unfairness but I just I just I want to allocate a few more tickets than you did. [TS]

00:58:16   So yeah the reason I'm saying you're Mister Softee is we had a notion of how many tickets we were going to have [TS]

00:58:21   and then you felt really bad because there were a bunch of people with puppy dog eyes in your mind staring at you [TS]

00:58:28   because they didn't get tickets and so we were thinking OK you know maybe it can be bigger [TS]

00:58:33   and then before I knew it you had already allocated a few more tickets to people [TS]

00:58:37   and why they say they will move to the line as to how many tickets which are which in reality only only meant if your [TS]

00:58:43   email arrived one second saying to you. [TS]

00:58:47   It's not like you know I made a difference you know that was a funny thing but it [TS]

00:58:52   but it is also I was teasing you about it [TS]

00:58:54   but it is also partly why the thing you want to talk about now just fair to say that we vastly underestimated the [TS]

00:59:03   demand for the event I think and so where were they. We're recording this. It's Wednesday right. [TS]

00:59:12   So the second round of take it from our perspective just went out today even though you dear listener are hearing this [TS]

00:59:19   well into the future. So yes we are trying to figure out something to do to maybe make the event slightly bigger. [TS]

00:59:27   Very slight So we have pretty much the problem is the room we're watching Star Wars India has like a maximum [TS]

00:59:35   and we're pretty much we're nearly there you know we have we can squeeze a few more people in we think so how many [TS]

00:59:41   tickets have you allocated at this point just people know we're actually talking about here. [TS]

00:59:45   I have allocated thirty OK to get this right but it actually went just over thirty because what I did was black. [TS]

00:59:56   If so the first round was going to the fair it was supposed to be ten and ten. [TS]

01:00:00   First but ended up being fifteen and fifteen right because Mr Softee because I'm Mr Softee right. [TS]

01:00:05   If if I had allocated if fourteen had gone and the next e-mail came in from someone saying Can I have two or three. [TS]

01:00:11   I let them get go over as well because I would have all their allocation. [TS]

01:00:16   So so for that reason there are actually thirty two have been allocated right. [TS]

01:00:21   OK so so so what we're thinking of is trying to see if we can because so many people wanted to come [TS]

01:00:27   and see if we can get a few more tickets to work it out with the room or the or the set up [TS]

01:00:32   or something with the zoo so we can have some more but the idea was always for it to be quite small intimate as well. [TS]

01:00:37   Yes And and in fairness to David Prowse like you know he had just agreed to me and a few friends. [TS]

01:00:43   So you know it's kind of we don't spiral out of control [TS]

01:00:46   but we are going to get we are going to rustle up a few more tickets a few more tickets [TS]

01:00:50   but we're not we're not like removing this to Royal Albert Hall [TS]

01:00:53   or anything no no that's that's not what's going to happen with you know a handful more tickets at most if we can. [TS]

01:00:59   Yeah [TS]

01:00:59   but so now we know at this moment we don't do that you know we're going to do we're not going to do that e-mail thing [TS]

01:01:05   against because that was really pro life now it was that was cool for me to watch it all my life I got my wife to come [TS]

01:01:12   into that mid day because she just happened to be walking past an office and I said What is this. [TS]

01:01:16   And like when she came and stood next to me and I put the e-mail address on the blog and she [TS]

01:01:21   and I said you see me do that she said Yep and I said watch this and I refresh the G. [TS]

01:01:25   Mail page and I went and it was incredibly impressed by them. She didn't know she was not impressed. [TS]

01:01:33   She saw it was like she said it was really cruel as well because you know I know exactly what that's like. [TS]

01:01:38   My wife and I have spent many a morning with like nineteen computers set up [TS]

01:01:42   and eight telephones trying to like you know buy tickets for the Glastonbury Music Festival in the sort of fifteen [TS]

01:01:48   minute window you get one Sunday morning and you know it's an agonizing thing [TS]

01:01:53   and I feel really bad for people who missed out and that's just unfortunate that has had to happen. [TS]

01:02:00   Our tickets and I think where heavily leaning towards auctioning these tickets. [TS]

01:02:08   Yes well you feel very badly about this but how I feel is that there is a market failure here. [TS]

01:02:15   And so what we have is very high demand for a very small event that is also very difficult to price correctly. [TS]

01:02:25   Yeah this to me screams auction right. This is like what an auction is made for. I don't know what the price should be. [TS]

01:02:34   Is it a one time kind of thing so you can figure it out later. [TS]

01:02:37   And you obviously have way more people who want to show up than can possibly show up the best way to deal with this is [TS]

01:02:44   an auction [TS]

01:02:45   and because I would about like some you know I already had university students e-mailing me saying it was too expensive [TS]

01:02:51   so the fifty pounds for a ticket. [TS]

01:02:53   We don't I don't say which I don't think was very expensive by the way because you know just buying David Prowse [TS]

01:02:58   autograph gets near that on the signs. Well this is also that we are doing this for a charity event. [TS]

01:03:06   Yeah and so that's how that's why you persuaded me to do the auction. [TS]

01:03:10   Yeah I mean I mean just think about this why Brady isn't since you're Mr Softee. [TS]

01:03:13   We could have just given all the tickets away [TS]

01:03:16   but then the poor Penguins would be looking at you with their big puppy dog eyes chewing on chewing on a fish bone [TS]

01:03:24   because they don't have anything to eat. [TS]

01:03:25   Crammed into a tiny box you know they've got twenty two a mound [TS]

01:03:29   and then I'm going to complain I would have to do send you photos of sad looking parents if you gave away all the [TS]

01:03:34   tickets for free. [TS]

01:03:35   There's going to be an option for the for the remaining tickets if you are just I think we're not at this one we're not [TS]

01:03:40   one hundred percent sure that's what the case is a case like check that description things might have changed [TS]

01:03:45   but the very least I would like to set this up as an option here because I think then that this is only a few tickets [TS]

01:03:52   left and then this also gives us the opportunity to raise more money for the zoo instead of less money for the zoo and. [TS]

01:04:00   You're like a crazy person who super loves Darth Vader. Hello Internet and penguins and you're rich. [TS]

01:04:09   Like you can you know maybe spend a whole bunch of money on this event and be really happy. [TS]

01:04:13   Like you'll be happy to hatch a perfect storm of failure interest. [TS]

01:04:16   Yeah if you're if you're into is really our Star Wars penguins and hello internets [TS]

01:04:20   and you are you know a venture capitalist or something your congressman or a congressman. [TS]

01:04:27   Yes yes we did have you were telling me we actually had people trying to come from abroad is I think some of the [TS]

01:04:33   tickets have been allocated to people in other countries. [TS]

01:04:36   That's crazy but there were people like I think there was Korea and the United States and Canada [TS]

01:04:42   and I was like look because I don't know where they're from but I was looking at their phone numbers [TS]

01:04:47   and looking up the you know international codes [TS]

01:04:49   and you know it feels weird people wanting to come all the way from like Asia [TS]

01:04:53   and then getting an e-mail saying well you're not coming because you can't have a ticket to the very first come first [TS]

01:05:02   serve us so it went. [TS]

01:05:03   But this is this is what auctions are not as good for you I mean I think you get irritated because you have sometimes [TS]

01:05:08   asked me questions for solutions to various problems that are along the line I'm always like auction auctions always [TS]

01:05:13   the solution. [TS]

01:05:15   And you know I'm always surprised the places that sell tickets don't do that way more often of having some portion of [TS]

01:05:21   the tickets up for auction coming up. [TS]

01:05:23   Well I hope the brown papers from number five [TS]

01:05:26   when this that's what I show on the site you know I'm not I'm not opposed to auctioning things [TS]

01:05:30   but this was just a bit of a different one [TS]

01:05:32   and anyway it has caused me more distress initiative over the last couple days and you have pain. [TS]

01:05:41   You have been a slab of granite for me to cry on. As usual I think I have been exactly as comforting as a slab. [TS]

01:05:55   You know tears are rolling down the surface of my cold skin. But I'm just thinking sounds like an auction. [TS]

01:06:02   That's what this sounds like so if you do the mile you will get an e-mail about how we're going to take it [TS]

01:06:11   and even if you didn't know the mouth I guess you can still go on the auction because we can't keep the auction secret [TS]

01:06:18   so it's open to everyone. [TS]

01:06:20   Good luck [TS]

01:06:21   and look forward to seeing people there on May the ninth not May the fourth I know you may the fourth a Star Wars Day [TS]

01:06:29   It was not in my control to get the day [TS]

01:06:32   and so you don't need to aim I mean so he should have done it before I'm not a fan of the May the fourth thing I think [TS]

01:06:38   that's dumb. I think it's disrespectful to Star Wars. Well it's pretty intense there. [TS]

01:06:45   Yeah I mean no disrespect was the prequels but this was. That's an interesting choice of words to go for there. [TS]

01:06:52   May the fourth is disrespectful to the Star Wars movie making a pun about something especially as the night May the [TS]

01:06:59   Force be with you know which is this you know iconic important thing is a good film made a fool to do this week that's [TS]

01:07:05   close to my husband that I mean ponder just dumb anyway. [TS]

01:07:10   Yeah I'm not a fan of the puns Anyway good luck in the auction people speaking of magnificent cultural milestones I do [TS]

01:07:22   love my Segway like a Segway anything. Yeah yeah you put something in the show next about that great T.V. [TS]

01:07:28   Show that is the one. [TS]

01:07:30   Oh oh this is what you want talk about OK what do you think I was going to ask [TS]

01:07:34   and I thought they were like Is it just on my mind and I we're not there yet. [TS]

01:07:39   Tell me this thing about the why why do you put the wire in the show Next I put the wire in the show notes. [TS]

01:07:43   We've mentioned it before on the show but you and I are both large fans of The Wire. [TS]

01:07:48   I think it's a great great television show. That's when we saw it wasn't that good. [TS]

01:07:54   Maybe one day we should do we should do a discussion on each of the series or something which is I think. [TS]

01:08:00   Possibly do after we watch them it's been so long. [TS]

01:08:02   Well you know I was never going to like series five because that's going to get so newspaper [TS]

01:08:06   and obviously not a lot of newspapers so you know [TS]

01:08:09   when they do something about something you're an expert in all those series for was in a school zone [TS]

01:08:14   or you're trying to have this conversation that we should assign then I read it on at home [TS]

01:08:19   or at some point I don't know if we actually ever will [TS]

01:08:21   but we can assign people what five foot five series of the wife of homework to do if we can tell people to watch cereal [TS]

01:08:30   and we can tell people to listen to cereal and they do it. [TS]

01:08:34   I actually on my Twitter just today I had two tweets in a row from people who said the exact same thing with me that I [TS]

01:08:40   finally got all the way through theory and I'm going to go back to my pod hello internet. [TS]

01:08:44   Crazy these lives of just stopped with exactly right if we ever do the why we should do it a season at a time that we [TS]

01:08:52   would do all five seasons in is where that would be a good way to just gradually erode our listener base rather than do [TS]

01:08:58   it in one fell swoop. [TS]

01:09:00   And I think that was well [TS]

01:09:02   but very much like the hello internet pod cast I think the wire is a hard show for people to get into theirs [TS]

01:09:11   and there are a lot of things that make it difficult yet to start [TS]

01:09:16   and one of the things that kept me from watching it for years is that it is broadly a police drama in a sense might be [TS]

01:09:23   that the category that you put it in [TS]

01:09:25   and whenever I heard that my brain automatically categorized it was stuff like Law and Order [TS]

01:09:30   and a whole bunch of other shows I just zero interest in the original don't know what it was good before I started [TS]

01:09:35   getting all franchised and we had the original original don't know what it was awesome. [TS]

01:09:40   Jerry all back and I can't speak to its quality but it sounds like you're quite a fan of the original stuff was good. [TS]

01:09:47   I'll take your word for it. [TS]

01:09:49   But yes there are [TS]

01:09:49   but one of the things for modern audiences in particular that is difficult about The Wire is I mean it was you know [TS]

01:09:57   shot I always forget it. Like the late one nine hundred ninety S. Early two thousand. [TS]

01:10:03   Around that time period I think and it is done. [TS]

01:10:07   But first of all like old style sitcoms that shot in a four three ratio as opposed to a one nine hundred six ratio. [TS]

01:10:14   So if you're watching it on a modern T.V. [TS]

01:10:15   Screen you have a huge black bars vertically on either side which drives some people crazy [TS]

01:10:20   and it was also standard definition there was no high definition version but so just recently H.B.O. [TS]

01:10:26   Has released a high definition wide screen version of The Wire the widescreen I was very suspicious [TS]

01:10:33   when I first heard about this because David Simon the Creator is sort of in the Tory asleep picky about the way things [TS]

01:10:39   have been framed and the way he set up the original thing and apparently H.B.O. [TS]

01:10:44   Was going back through all of the old film and updating it for widescreen [TS]

01:10:51   and high definition because if you ever see like behind the scenes footage of people making a movie they shoot much [TS]

01:10:58   much bigger than is actually ever cropped down to even in cinematic films you can see they usually like like what you [TS]

01:11:06   watch the red letter media reviews of the original Star Wars or the Star Wars prequels. [TS]

01:11:10   There's tons of shots of Lucas sitting in front of his monitors [TS]

01:11:14   but there's usually a little rectangle taped in the center of the monitor [TS]

01:11:18   and so they're actually filming the whole image. But they're going to crop it down to just a smaller section. Yeah. [TS]

01:11:24   So they finally went back to the original footage of the wire and we're using the wider shots. [TS]

01:11:30   But this this can have enormous problems and there was they did as a fox. [TS]

01:11:36   I think maybe it was did that with Buffy the Vampire Slayer a few years ago [TS]

01:11:39   and people were furious because they just tons of shots where you could just see the crew standing off on the side [TS]

01:11:47   that's were unfinished because it was not intended to be shot like that and you know [TS]

01:11:51   when you're filming stuff there's people all around you know [TS]

01:11:54   and so I was kind of worried that the new wire release would be like that and I was pretty much just assume. [TS]

01:12:00   When I was going to write it off [TS]

01:12:01   but then David Simon wrote this interesting blog post talking about how he was somewhat involved in this [TS]

01:12:08   and how he was he had someone who was working with him who was going through all the shots in the wire [TS]

01:12:15   and it's it is a very interesting article to read from someone who has created a kind of seminal piece of media talking [TS]

01:12:21   about how some things are much better with H.D. [TS]

01:12:25   and The widescreen chance and some things are obviously much worse but it is like the world's most cautious. [TS]

01:12:32   He sort of approves of this version of The Wire [TS]

01:12:36   and he views it as like an alternate version that might be good for getting people into the series who might otherwise [TS]

01:12:42   not. I did say it is necessary myself it doesn't bother me especially H.-T. S.-T. and I care about. [TS]

01:12:48   I was going to watch on my laptop in bed anyway. [TS]

01:12:51   Yes it's I was aware when I watched it the first time when I felt terribly sick at a family reunion a few years ago [TS]

01:12:59   and had nothing else to do that the first few episodes I felt like I did have a bit more resistance to it [TS]

01:13:06   and if it wasn't for the fact that I had nothing else to watch I'm not sure I would have continued onward. [TS]

01:13:10   Though I just think the widescreen H.D. [TS]

01:13:13   Thing makes it easier for people so if you are one of the people like I used to be who has heard everyone in the world [TS]

01:13:20   talk about how good the wire is and you have never watched it the H.D. [TS]

01:13:24   Widescreen version might be a good place to start and to to try that show out as we've all really like it [TS]

01:13:30   and how to recommend it. Hello Internet. [TS]

01:13:33   This episode is brought to you by Squarespace Squarespace is the easiest way to create a beautiful website blog [TS]

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01:14:16   As you may know square space is what I personally used to run C.D.P. [TS]

01:14:20   Gray dot com And this podcast that you're listening to right now so I highly recommend it. [TS]

01:14:26   You can start a trial today with no credit card required [TS]

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01:14:35   can just go and play around with square space just as it is try out all the features. See what it's like. [TS]

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01:14:44   Make sure to use the offer code hello to get a ten percent off your first purchase [TS]

01:14:48   and to show your support for hello internet. [TS]

01:14:51   As always we want to thank Squarespace for their support of this show Squarespace build it beautiful. [TS]

01:14:59   Last episode we talked about something we didn't have time to talk about which you dubbed You Tube I can say this very [TS]

01:15:05   well I cannot say sorry half carrying half assed or any other way. [TS]

01:15:12   For all the people who think that's me swearing no one is that if that's me swearing that's me swearing I know we say [TS]

01:15:18   that Brady doesn't swear I have a list of words I don't say and a list of words I do say [TS]

01:15:24   and as an ass on the list of words I do say so I have a I have a question for you about this list [TS]

01:15:30   and not done to derail it here but not so that occurred to me so you don't say these words. [TS]

01:15:35   Yeah and I totally respect that. Could you write the words. Would that be breaking the streak. [TS]

01:15:41   How do you how do you treat this. [TS]

01:15:45   I have no policy on that but I mean look I don't write them I never have written them [TS]

01:15:50   but let's say you know on the Reddit or you know on the Internet like you do you're getting into some huge argument [TS]

01:15:57   and you want to call someone. Working right. Yeah like you don't read it sometimes. Yeah but like they did. [TS]

01:16:07   Would you feel comfortable writing those words I mean if the person really deeply deserved it I would not do that [TS]

01:16:14   but OK would you think that you were breaking your streak though is that why you wouldn't do it [TS]

01:16:18   or you just probably OK I just I was I was wondering [TS]

01:16:23   and I think you could take it both ways that it does maybe it breaks the street maybe it doesn't [TS]

01:16:28   but you think it breaks the street if you write it. [TS]

01:16:29   Maybe I just wouldn't I wouldn't right not to be thought I think I think you'll be getting the base out there. [TS]

01:16:38   So what did you mean by You Tube And I said Yeah right to put my notes here [TS]

01:16:45   and if I've forgotten I was all angry last week. [TS]

01:16:48   Now right now i wasn't it wasn't like we're going to have you know which cheating if we're recording this quite soon [TS]

01:16:53   after we're recording it soon [TS]

01:16:55   but it's still been a while since last summer record that that one out actually produce the stuff. [TS]

01:16:59   Yeah again this is just like a very minor thing. However it's not like it's been built out let's just crack on cam. [TS]

01:17:11   I find that there are many things in You Tube which feel unfinished might be the kindest way to put it. [TS]

01:17:19   Yeah but half assed is really the way they feel to me. [TS]

01:17:22   Very many times [TS]

01:17:23   when I'm using it it's a bit like some someone was just trying to check that like a good enough tick box [TS]

01:17:31   and they got there and just left it and like when I make the bed versus when my wife next to bed sounds very likely. [TS]

01:17:38   Yes sounds very likely so on my last video on the Lord Of The Rings part two [TS]

01:17:45   and for a couple things I'm working on I've decided OK I'm going to go all in on a new You Tube feature because this is [TS]

01:17:52   obviously the thing that they want people to use but this is the thing that has struck me as remarkably half. [TS]

01:18:00   Fast and it is what You Tube is calling cards I just remembered that you told me to go and look at it and I haven't. [TS]

01:18:09   I swear I could feel you hesitating over something through my headphones. [TS]

01:18:13   I was just saying I realized I hadn't looked at it I've seen the feature obviously [TS]

01:18:18   but like I say in this thing that I WANT ME TO DO I haven't even a clue what is clicked on it. [TS]

01:18:23   Well not OK This is good because most people listening to this podcast unlike you [TS]

01:18:27   and I don't actually make You Tube videos although I do use the back end of each day [TS]

01:18:32   but in this case this is part of the back and I haven't used so you can explain it to me. [TS]

01:18:38   OK just like you explaining it to everyone else on many of the generalist nature of everyone else first on You Tube at [TS]

01:18:44   the moment the future many people may be familiar with our annotations and so the way this works is this is [TS]

01:18:49   when you're watching a video it's some blogger and they're telling you about something [TS]

01:18:54   and they want you to go somewhere. [TS]

01:18:56   Aside from this video they want you to sign up for an email list they want you to go check out somebody else's video [TS]

01:19:01   whatever it is and they almost always say something like you know click on my face [TS]

01:19:06   and you can go see this other video that I made on this new channel or whatever it is. [TS]

01:19:10   So they let hyperlinks on the video basically. [TS]

01:19:12   When you make a video you can draw a rectangle on the screen and tell you to [TS]

01:19:17   when somebody clicks within that rectangle you can take them to location X. [TS]

01:19:22   and It's a hyperlink at the link and we're going to we're going to talk about how rubbish that system is. [TS]

01:19:28   Well I mean it is a terrible What do you want to complain I don't have anything about that in particular well I just [TS]

01:19:32   find it. [TS]

01:19:33   Clunky and clunky to use and it's like something from years [TS]

01:19:38   and years ago on the Internet it's like do you know this is what made me think about a manned. [TS]

01:19:43   Well why don't you just broke into my office. She actually she literally destroy I literally just opened the door. [TS]

01:19:54   I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm a bit taken aback. Well so sorry. [TS]

01:20:00   You can use a lock picking kit you just left the door unhinge as she walked in. That's interesting. [TS]

01:20:04   Yeah yeah pretty much but it was very is a very unexpected appearance. [TS]

01:20:09   She broke into not going to kick around a bit over selling it. She so cute. Granny you are such a softie. [TS]

01:20:17   You know she's cute she's super cute. I can honestly say she's the cutest Wow I've ever seen. [TS]

01:20:23   She's so popular at the park as well because she hasn't got a personality like she's really brave and friendly [TS]

01:20:29   and goes up to everyone [TS]

01:20:31   and everyone loves if she's like a celebrity like like people I've never met I walk up to them in the park [TS]

01:20:36   or do you run up to them and oh look it's Audrey and they'll start talking to a lot and I know you are [TS]

01:20:40   and I've met heron [TS]

01:20:41   and I haven't even given how many times her youtube videos have been watched I think it is fair to say that she might [TS]

01:20:46   be one of the most famous two hours on the face of the earth. [TS]

01:20:49   She not but she's also that to get kicked out of office [TS]

01:20:51   and give me three seconds while I do not go grab the baseball that I can hear it cute. [TS]

01:20:59   And I'll see if I can make it make a noise making noise mental snuff we know it to the microphone go on which is now [TS]

01:21:06   you go silent. My carelessness will always give the guy you get what you get. [TS]

01:21:19   There are people pretty gone now it's just you and me to be doing all right. [TS]

01:21:25   Getting back to this professional podcast of oh hi hi how are you. [TS]

01:21:30   Like nothing ever happened like nothing ever happened yeah the really smooth at a point there. [TS]

01:21:36   Yeah the problem with the annotations is I don't want to go to like metier and to be in a house here and bore people [TS]

01:21:45   and I don't know so I don't want to I don't want to butter up one of responses here [TS]

01:21:49   and this is not got nothing to do with an ad or a sponsorship but this is made me realize and more than ever [TS]

01:21:54   and that is I recently have started using square space for my blog. [TS]

01:22:00   So obviously in doing that you know that's a web application like each is [TS]

01:22:05   and they're back in for like you know designing things in betting videos and putting pictures in [TS]

01:22:11   and changing your layout and designing things is like a pleasure to you and it looks good and it's smooth [TS]

01:22:20   and it's like it's what you would want to pay on the time it's perfect you know. [TS]

01:22:24   You know it's got its problems there are things I'd change but it's really really good [TS]

01:22:28   and it makes me realize how come square space which is clearly a smaller company than You Tube [TS]

01:22:34   and Google can make this really nice easy thing to use and the mighty mighty you chib when it makes its back end. [TS]

01:22:42   For us you know manipulating our videos and talking around it. [TS]

01:22:46   Popping on I run a Taishan stuff gives us this clunky thing where we're having to imprecisely drag things [TS]

01:22:53   and push things here and change the length of that that's just a piece of rubbish this is. [TS]

01:22:58   If you watch a lot of videos You Tube video something you'll notice which I feel a need to point out right now is that [TS]

01:23:04   when people use annotations you can usually make the annotation a little color so it's clear that you can click on this [TS]

01:23:09   box is on any of my videos at the end you'll see a little box of the recipe book. [TS]

01:23:13   We got the boxes are never censored you know he looks awful [TS]

01:23:18   and I just want to clarify for people is on my video is on every You Tube video you will ever go to the boxes always [TS]

01:23:24   look it looks like some child trying to outline whatever it is you can click if it's clear that it was what it was to [TS]

01:23:30   be run [TS]

01:23:30   and the reason it is it is so hard to precisely place those rectangles you just you wouldn't believe how hard it is to [TS]

01:23:38   draw a rectangle that's exactly where you want to pixel perfection as always just is just not even worth it. [TS]

01:23:43   You can now I'll spend two minutes trying to make this to exactly the right size or whatever. [TS]

01:23:49   I put it around the box because of going and controlling the moment it pops up on the screen [TS]

01:23:53   and comes off that's all right they are either that or take forever etc It is it is rather. [TS]

01:24:00   Yeah that's what it is it's not a good system now on the back end in particular [TS]

01:24:05   but at the very least people who use You Tube A lot are used to this idea of you click on the screen. [TS]

01:24:11   You go to the thing you know click on my face click over here people are used to that [TS]

01:24:15   and I can see through my analytics. People really click on annotations. [TS]

01:24:19   If I have something in my video and I say click over here people click on it yet. [TS]

01:24:23   So at least it works better for the user it's not so great for us. [TS]

01:24:27   But here is the thing that's been going on now for a few years is that annotations don't work on mobile devices. [TS]

01:24:35   So if you're watching a video and someone says Click on my face on an i Pad [TS]

01:24:40   and you go to tap on their face all you do is pause the video right. [TS]

01:24:43   Nothing happens there's no there's no clicking here and more [TS]

01:24:46   and more people are watching obviously on mobile devices that's really going through the roof. Yes. [TS]

01:24:51   I know again I'm not sure how much we can say about the data behind the scenes [TS]

01:24:55   but it is fair to say that the growth in mobile watching since I started youtube four years ago is monstrous. [TS]

01:25:04   I love how you say mobile American Mobile Mobile not mobile because when these words I think I've forgotten how I say. [TS]

01:25:14   Now as I mentioned before anyway so I think it's going to the right if they can click on the screen problem [TS]

01:25:20   and again you have made it sort of clear through their actions [TS]

01:25:24   and through some whispers that they were never going to make annotations work on i Phones [TS]

01:25:29   and i Pads that this was just not going to happen. [TS]

01:25:32   Who knows why and you know I'm happy to presume there's some technical reason why it's a huge pain in the butt [TS]

01:25:36   and they can't do it whatever others take that is given [TS]

01:25:39   but over a long time it was just all quiet on the Western Front of what's going to happen if they're going to be [TS]

01:25:45   something new [TS]

01:25:46   and then I don't know in the past few months maybe You Tube has started to roll out this feature called cards. [TS]

01:25:53   Cards are what You Tube wants you to use instead of annotations going forward. [TS]

01:26:00   Because the annotation system hasn't been updated since one thousand nine hundred five and the cards thing is new. [TS]

01:26:06   What is I have no idea what it is actually DO YOU LIKE if you have your i Phone on you or anything. [TS]

01:26:10   Yes it's in my hand. [TS]

01:26:11   OK search for my lord the Rings part one video icon your i Phone bring it up and seen me [TS]

01:26:19   and you're in the You Tube app right now and I think I've got to give up on my son. [TS]

01:26:24   You don't have you back on your phone your professional You Tube or you don't see how things look on the thing. [TS]

01:26:29   One hour video looks like my editor it looks like it's pictures on a rectangle. [TS]

01:26:37   You are so infuriating sometimes I don't even think you mean to be infuriating but you really are. [TS]

01:26:42   I I don't mean to be infuriating but I don't have the cheetah for my phone. [TS]

01:26:48   OK So describe this for everybody then you know wait for you to put on have you describe if you are then watching a You [TS]

01:26:56   Tube video in the You Tube app on your i Pad or on your i Phone or presumably on Android [TS]

01:27:01   but I haven't tested on Android I have no idea you haven't tested all Android you call yourself a professional You Tube [TS]

01:27:07   up to that little fiction fringes voices. [TS]

01:27:11   What were you going forward that was my that was my pompous lecture a telling off voice that he used of me before I [TS]

01:27:19   don't think I sounded anything like give him much to send about yourself. [TS]

01:27:24   Yeah OK so you're watching a video on You Tube on the app and what happens now is that there's no annotations [TS]

01:27:32   but there's a little I button the letter I that overlays on the screen [TS]

01:27:39   and what you can do is if you tap on it it brings up a little picture of here is where the link goes. [TS]

01:27:48   So for example you're watching Lord of the Rings part two in the very beginning. [TS]

01:27:52   I want to say you know if you missed part one tap on the thing you can watch part one first instead of watching part [TS]

01:27:57   two. Normally I would do that with an annotate. [TS]

01:28:00   I thought OK you do want us to use cards I'm going to use cards just like they're just annotations with a slightly [TS]

01:28:07   different mechanism and his name sort of but you really need to have looked at this thing this is frustrating. [TS]

01:28:14   So that's OK Is it really OK You keep telling me about. [TS]

01:28:20   Well I will have little if I want your video on my phone any OK because [TS]

01:28:25   when you're on the computer open open up open up You Tube on your computer there which I think I was trying to think [TS]

01:28:32   what I could say that would frustrate you [TS]

01:28:34   but you didn't come into my brain because I have if you say hey do you have a web browser on your computer I know what [TS]

01:28:39   you're trying to do over there. [TS]

01:28:40   Oh don't have a web browser by computer yet [TS]

01:28:43   but I knew you were reaching for something where you are going for something [TS]

01:28:48   and then they have not been to explore here. The good of a human. It's Mike's not even making an explorer for Mac. [TS]

01:28:58   Anymore I don't think they do I think so which one are calling up your first look at things we do do to do the second [TS]

01:29:03   ordering second one. OK now it's going to sit through an ad. [TS]

01:29:08   Pre Raul adds more more dollars into the great bank account. [TS]

01:29:13   Yeah I'm going to spend that billionth of a cent there it is. OK I see it actually looks nicer than an annotation. [TS]

01:29:21   It looks OK right here. [TS]

01:29:23   So when you when you look at the video because I put this right at the start it kind of rolls across the top [TS]

01:29:28   and it says suggested video lower the ring part one. [TS]

01:29:31   Yes and you'll see there's a little eye that stays in the corner of the letter I [TS]

01:29:35   and I circle so if you click on that for us it opens up this little window and then you can click again [TS]

01:29:42   and it'll take you to lower the Rings part one so I can either click on the video we were trying to find only a weighty [TS]

01:29:47   opaque Korean until I'm trying to I'm going to keep clicking on my videos [TS]

01:29:52   and collect all the ad revenue as the whole pocket for I think these are nicer than annotations. OK so probably. [TS]

01:30:00   It is useful but I look they look better. OK they are interesting. [TS]

01:30:05   They're an interesting option [TS]

01:30:07   and I want to be really clear I am not against cards because the annotation stuff is quite frankly in twenty fifteen [TS]

01:30:17   look just as ugly. There's no way around it. [TS]

01:30:19   We look awful so they are trying to make you thing these cards look nicer and achieve the same functionality. [TS]

01:30:26   But here is here is the thing where I start to get really frustrated with the half assed this of it. [TS]

01:30:30   Now you were on the computer when you're looking at the video that I play [TS]

01:30:36   and it looks like the information thing like you see in like an airport is a circle with a letter I understated [TS]

01:30:41   and it's not OK. You notice where it is on the screen top right corner. OK what normally goes in the top right corner. [TS]

01:30:50   Now I don't I was that way your other fingers and [TS]

01:30:53   when I write it normal normally for four channels that's where they put the little branding box slash subscriber [TS]

01:31:01   but yeah. [TS]

01:31:02   So when you watch people's videos [TS]

01:31:04   and if you know you watch like destines video he has a little smarter every day logo and it's in the top right. [TS]

01:31:10   And it acts as a watermark and it also acts as a button the people can press to subscribe to the channel. Yeah. [TS]

01:31:16   So now if you put a card on a video it goes in the exact same place that branding box would go under or over [TS]

01:31:26   or instead a no no in place of raw so you have to choose between either the branding box or the little I [TS]

01:31:35   and this to me seems like the half acid ness because it's like OK You Tube this four corners of the screen you have the [TS]

01:31:43   top right for the branding box [TS]

01:31:44   or they're not going to touch their sacred caliber of advertising down the bottom of the bottom middle goes for the ad. [TS]

01:31:52   Yeah. Bottom left is the channel wide suggested suggested videos. So you sometimes see that pop up. [TS]

01:32:00   Just kind of irritating but whatever. [TS]

01:32:01   So but we can't use bottom left Can't you the middle because that would look dumb. [TS]

01:32:06   It still leave the You Tube to corners to pick from. I think top left makes the most sense for where the I should go. [TS]

01:32:12   Yeah I can see the bottom because you could accidently click on ads and things [TS]

01:32:15   and then you get taken away to Russian brides or whatever so they may have a purpose or a goal [TS]

01:32:20   or money from a perfectly good corner which is top left that they could use [TS]

01:32:24   but for some reason they decided to to have an overlap on where the branding part supposed to go. [TS]

01:32:31   Now this is really irritating because the branding boxing was sold to us as oh hey we want you guys to stop manually [TS]

01:32:37   watermarking your videos because it's horrifically inconsistent [TS]

01:32:40   and we're bringing across this whole solution of now like we have this branding box you don't have to do that it'll [TS]

01:32:46   just pop up automatically inital nicely rescale based on the size of the video that people are watching so it was this [TS]

01:32:52   like solution that was brought on board and so I stopped more manually watermarking a bunch of my videos [TS]

01:32:57   but now if I want to have anything anywhere in the video that people want to click it doesn't even matter if that card [TS]

01:33:03   is not supposed to appear until the last ten seconds of the video that little white I will be there the whole time. [TS]

01:33:10   Also this cut you don't you can control this card in terms of have different cards come up at different times. [TS]

01:33:16   Oh we'll get to this in a moment but for the moment it is rock. [TS]

01:33:21   Everyone was still listening but it locks the brandy box now OK. [TS]

01:33:26   It's as if that wasn't half assed enough if you watch is the exact same video on your i Pad They put the little guy in [TS]

01:33:35   the top left hand corner. Yeah. [TS]

01:33:38   So it's not consistent between devices and then the other thing that drives me crazy is on your computer. [TS]

01:33:44   The little guy is in a circle. On your i Pad or on your i Phone They put the little guy on a pile of squares. [TS]

01:33:51   We have a whole different icon which is kind of vaguely falsely Fredy for people to click and like OK how like how men. [TS]

01:34:00   Hundreds of people working on the Hill I think I'm going to bed not many. [TS]

01:34:04   I'm going to bet this is a team of like ten people working on cards. [TS]

01:34:08   They couldn't coordinate between the two of them which freaking corner it's supposed to go in [TS]

01:34:12   and so I'm trying to think in the future like when you tell people oh hey click on the whatever. [TS]

01:34:18   There's no answer to the question. I can't say click on the i in the upper left hand corner. [TS]

01:34:23   Because if you're watching it on a computer it's on the upper right [TS]

01:34:25   and I can say the reverse on the computer because it's going to be in the opposite direction on on your i Pad [TS]

01:34:31   but this to me just like screams half assed sadness that somebody just like through this together. [TS]

01:34:38   So make it consistent now will have different icons on different devices. [TS]

01:34:42   Because we just couldn't be bothered to coordinate between the mobile team and the desktop team and then it's. [TS]

01:34:48   Like it doesn't sound like it's a huge problem but it's really nice if you can tell people where to click. [TS]

01:34:54   But you can't tell people where to place click in the right to left. [TS]

01:34:58   But you don't have to say OK there is no way to say click on the left or click on the right right. [TS]

01:35:04   You can even say click on the circle because there's a square on the other thing right so the other thing is they can [TS]

01:35:10   change these things to you so you could say click on the i [TS]

01:35:12   and then tomorrow they could implement a sot wide change where they change it to a question mark or something. [TS]

01:35:17   Yes And this is exactly eard as well. [TS]

01:35:19   Yeah [TS]

01:35:20   and it's like if you watch if you watch old youtube videos you know the descriptions used to be on the side of the video [TS]

01:35:25   they didn't used to be below [TS]

01:35:27   and so like I call the old blog brothers videos they tell you to click on the link it's in the description [TS]

01:35:31   and they're always pointing to one side of the screen which then you know just look silly now because they move where [TS]

01:35:36   the description is. [TS]

01:35:37   Yeah I feel like I don't trust where this guy is going to be [TS]

01:35:40   and that's a problem if you want to make videos that last a long time where people are going to click on a thing you [TS]

01:35:45   just end up looking dumb because you're talking about a thing that doesn't quite exist or don't do that then. [TS]

01:35:52   OK that's fine but it's still is still like it's a limited functionality [TS]

01:35:57   and just like if you bring on your solution doesn't work. [TS]

01:36:00   It has its limitations and I don't agree it's a bit half baked but even if it wasn't half baked [TS]

01:36:07   and it was implemented beautifully you still couldn't trust just like just what the world brothers' example you go [TS]

01:36:12   where they moved the video description [TS]

01:36:14   and you know people say click the Subscribe button I point down to where the subscribe button used today [TS]

01:36:19   and it's not there anymore like you eat anything that is not part of the video you're making on the screen. [TS]

01:36:25   You run you run a massive risk. Doing this I can live you know I totally agree with you. [TS]

01:36:33   I guess my point is if you can't make the freaking I go in the same spot on two different platforms you're starting out [TS]

01:36:41   with me just not trusting it yet as far as I can throw it right out of the gates. [TS]

01:36:45   Yes if I say you couldn't the only thing that could be better is that they put it in the bottom left on i Phones [TS]

01:36:50   but not i Pad for that that would be just absolutely perfect. [TS]

01:36:54   So the other thing that irritates me about this and it's going to be a little bit trickier to describe [TS]

01:36:59   when you go to make one of these little annotations. [TS]

01:37:02   There's a bunch of options so it was an undertaking or a car trunk [TS]

01:37:05   when you go to make one of these little cards you have a bunch of options. [TS]

01:37:09   And so OK so they say I want to link to my website for my e-mail list like I did in the last video [TS]

01:37:14   and this is where the problem came up. OK I put in the U.R.L. [TS]

01:37:19   and Then I give it a title and then I have to put the little text that says oh like Click here for the actual card. [TS]

01:37:26   I spent a whole afternoon trying to play around with this because those three fields appear in different places under [TS]

01:37:34   different circumstances. So when I say click here. [TS]

01:37:38   Sometimes on the computer it seems to pop up that it says click here is what appears on the top of the screen instead [TS]

01:37:44   of what I want to say which is great email list and I've played around with this [TS]

01:37:49   and I I just I'm like I'm not an idiot. I do this for a living. There's no way to make this look. [TS]

01:37:55   Not stupid in one place or another either on the phone or on the I. [TS]

01:38:00   I Pad So like there's no correct listing of descriptions you can possibly And again this is just like half assed edness [TS]

01:38:06   like I just say this is the field that's going to appear on the video this one right here [TS]

01:38:14   and then like here is the button for when the little card pops up that says click here. [TS]

01:38:17   But now it's like it's different in different places it just feels so terribly half assed [TS]

01:38:22   and if you're looking at like the lower the Rings video right now if you click on that I will show you all of the cards [TS]

01:38:31   that exist for this video. Oh hang on first of all going to give you another billionth of a cent. Thank you. [TS]

01:38:38   Spend it wisely. [TS]

01:38:40   I came in on they are going to be quick on the eye you'll see this video I have two cards at the very top one is Lord [TS]

01:38:47   Of The Rings part one. Yeah and the bottom one is to get the wallpaper. Yeah like that's going to happen. [TS]

01:38:53   But so if you're watching at the end of the video and you want to click on that wallpaper link. [TS]

01:38:59   You have to click on the I. [TS]

01:39:01   It opens up the window on the side you have to scroll down to the appropriate card [TS]

01:39:06   and then click on the right part of that card to actually go to the link. [TS]

01:39:12   So like a three step process and the annotations used to be like Click on this link or click on my face and boom done. [TS]

01:39:17   It just would take you automatically [TS]

01:39:19   and it's a we it's a weird thing on the i Phone as well that if you click on the I it shows you every single link [TS]

01:39:25   that's in this video and you have to like flip through the cards to find the right one [TS]

01:39:29   and then tap on that it's just it's it's weird it's it's this is a thing that I had was with a couple of You Tube [TS]

01:39:37   things one of which I can't talk about because I was in a private trial for it [TS]

01:39:40   but here's the thing Jim I have a Palm Pilot back in the day Brady not to be the Palm Pilot It's not that there's a [TS]

01:39:48   personal P.T.A.'s I used to be a really cool person because I had a Palm Pilot [TS]

01:39:52   and I had one of the holsters on my belt from Palm Island. Wow Did you have a big bunch of keys on your belt. [TS]

01:39:58   I did not have a bunch of keys on my belt. [TS]

01:40:00   But I had a holster for my Palm Pilot which is how you know that I was super cool. [TS]

01:40:03   This was in college by the way let me tell you the ladies they were driven crazy by my partner [TS]

01:40:11   but one thing I always thought was cool with that palm. [TS]

01:40:13   The guys who made the operating system that they had a dude whose job was to count taps how many taps did it take to do [TS]

01:40:21   a task and his whole job was to try to eliminate the number of taps it took to do something like send an email [TS]

01:40:27   or change a contactless [TS]

01:40:29   or whatever it is I swear You Tube employs an antique tap counter because there's so many things that they change [TS]

01:40:38   and they make it into more clicks. [TS]

01:40:40   Yeah there's one thing I can do now in about five clicks which they bring in a new system and I counted it [TS]

01:40:45   and I sent them an email. It was something like oh it'll take twenty five clicks on the new system it is infuriating. [TS]

01:40:52   I mean the one one thing that I can talk about is that they just change the way like if you want to upload captions to [TS]

01:40:58   the video. [TS]

01:40:59   Like English language captions I've I've you know I've already written a script for my video I can upload that script [TS]

01:41:05   to youtube. It used to just be like a three click process but now it's a five quick process. [TS]

01:41:10   Plus there's some bizarre reason I can figure out you have to wait for like a minute it says OK you know we're [TS]

01:41:16   processing the captions and then come back later and remember to publish it. [TS]

01:41:19   That is caught me out and I think the past three of my videos I think what it shouldn't. [TS]

01:41:23   Every time you change something it shouldn't be more clicks and more time to get the same thing done. [TS]

01:41:29   It's very frustrating it's very frustrating. [TS]

01:41:32   Yeah I don't I'm not [TS]

01:41:34   and I don't I I don't know what to say I feel a bit like I feel it's only for the listeners I feel like I can imagine [TS]

01:41:42   this into a podcast of two brain surgeons and they going on the way that you you know. [TS]

01:41:47   Cauterizing laser scalpel six funny in your right hand [TS]

01:41:52   when you need to use your left hand doesn't like it's pretty nice stuff [TS]

01:41:55   but this is the stuff that drives us crazy then. Yeah and they do. [TS]

01:42:00   Like you know all the people I know you've already like [TS]

01:42:03   but I am sometimes baffled by some of the decisions they made I mean when we were at one time and we got to see [TS]

01:42:10   and I'm aging with some of the technical people you know some of the engineering people [TS]

01:42:16   and they were telling us some of their plans [TS]

01:42:19   and you know well you know asking our opinions on things just they know it's really it's not like we're in there to [TS]

01:42:24   call the shots and yeah and we would raise a few things with them but you seem really obvious and market was like. [TS]

01:42:32   Funny how if you can you know see this is in signs like this is can you not say this is a problem and it's like [TS]

01:42:40   but it's almost like it's not like they are here [TS]

01:42:42   and I hang on that's a problem that is kind of just look at you know and then. [TS]

01:42:47   Walk away and do it anyway like and then it becomes a problem. [TS]

01:42:52   I've spoken to a bunch of people who work in youtube every one of them individually is very nice [TS]

01:42:57   and is very concerned about video creators and that's my Obviously you know. [TS]

01:43:01   Yeah yeah but but like systemically The group does something that none of the individuals might want to have happen [TS]

01:43:07   and that's just the way this is the way that it works. [TS]

01:43:10   There are something that are just hugely frustrating [TS]

01:43:12   and I have like I have a remarkably long list about things that I hate about these new cards [TS]

01:43:17   and things that just don't work very well. You can't edit them if they're a U.R.L. [TS]

01:43:21   Like if there's a link to a video you just have to delete the whole thing and start over. [TS]

01:43:24   You can just change the link this is all of these little things about it that just scream haphazardness [TS]

01:43:29   but I have a more of a more to to brought this out now which is ones one the second you know why using them if you [TS]

01:43:35   don't like them so much I'm not using them. [TS]

01:43:37   Tell me what I should be using [TS]

01:43:39   when I'm well I don't know if you should be using them I use them because I like to link to stuff in my videos [TS]

01:43:45   and even though I did a lot of man attentions. [TS]

01:43:48   Here's with my my regular My regular viewers have noticed that the number of annotations that I put in my videos has [TS]

01:43:54   dropped off and that's for a couple of reasons but one of which is it just seems to me really obvious that the anatase. [TS]

01:44:00   System is ignored [TS]

01:44:01   and so I always feel like as soon as I get like the tiniest whiff that a system is not going to be continued. [TS]

01:44:09   I feel very reluctant to continue to invest time and effort into it. [TS]

01:44:12   And so at this stage I basically use annotations at the end of my videos mostly and kind of Nowhere else. [TS]

01:44:18   And then when the cards come on board I feel like well I'm happy to go and work with this new system [TS]

01:44:23   and try to figure out its limitations and get my mobile views are really high. [TS]

01:44:29   So if I have to use a thing that people can click on their i Phones I think that's a real deal breaker at this point [TS]

01:44:38   for annotations for me yet. [TS]

01:44:39   So I put these cards in so that right now at the end of my video there is an annotation that people can click [TS]

01:44:46   but there is also a card at that point which a person can tap and then scroll and then find the right place [TS]

01:44:52   and then tap on the wrong thing and then tap on the actual link and then get to the place where they need to go. [TS]

01:44:57   Another chore for me and all the videos are loaded is great. [TS]

01:45:01   Yeah well I mean I went back through and try to add cars to a whole bunch of my old videos [TS]

01:45:05   and then I realized that because they do this confusing way. [TS]

01:45:09   At this moment I have a ton of videos with cards that just look ridiculously stupid because I did something in the [TS]

01:45:16   backwards way but I can guarantee you it was not my fault. [TS]

01:45:19   But so there's tons of cards a pop up my videos either to say Click Me and there's no indication about what it is [TS]

01:45:24   and it's just I feel so stupid I hate that stuff it is hard to prioritize going back to fixing it. [TS]

01:45:29   Yeah but I have I have it I have a slightly other example of half ass or e YES YOU CAN STOP ME about here [TS]

01:45:34   but I think is more interesting I don't you know I think I could stop you now. [TS]

01:45:39   Go on You Tube ostensibly is a video platform. [TS]

01:45:43   I mean we know it's really a music platform but people upload videos [TS]

01:45:46   and one of the things that has driven me crazy for years is why can't you be as good as Netflix for watching videos [TS]

01:45:56   with respect to stuff that happens in order. [TS]

01:46:00   Like crash course which has courses that go in order is a crash course is doing world history you want to watch those [TS]

01:46:07   in order [TS]

01:46:08   or wheezy waiter who makes daily blogs his videos he uploads every day he has enormous number of videos you could have [TS]

01:46:16   perfectly just been said [TS]

01:46:17   or periodic videos where they do all the elements in the periodic table in order while you do all the elements in order [TS]

01:46:23   I don't think it's an integral part of the story [TS]

01:46:25   but if you're watching wheezy waiter videos it really matters that you watch them in order [TS]

01:46:29   and can't watch them in any order. [TS]

01:46:31   Whereas if I watched a video about tungsten first [TS]

01:46:34   and then Boron I don't think it's going to be like oh I missed a development in the plot here right. [TS]

01:46:41   Yeah where did this clown come from right where with with with the waiter it's helpful to watch him every day. [TS]

01:46:46   And so will my mind for years. Two things one on You Tube Why can I as a creator. [TS]

01:46:52   Nowhere indicate to you tube that this video is part one of X. [TS]

01:46:57   There's no metadata anywhere where I can put that in to say oh this video is part two [TS]

01:47:02   and here's part one that doesn't exist anywhere. And secondly why can't it be like on Netflix where. [TS]

01:47:09   Oh Netflix I'm watching house of cards the next time I go back to Netflix [TS]

01:47:13   and I click on house of cards it picks up from where I left off. [TS]

01:47:16   Made freaking episode right [TS]

01:47:19   and then it will just play the next one I don't understand why isn't there a place on youtube where I can go [TS]

01:47:25   and click a button and it takes me back to wherever I was in a sequential channel. [TS]

01:47:30   Where did you leave off you when your videos were just going to bring you right there [TS]

01:47:34   and you can pick up where you left off. Oh you were in the middle of Crash Course world history. [TS]

01:47:37   Great we're going to drop you off where you started and continue to move onward. [TS]

01:47:41   It is it is downed ing how bad you tube is sequential content [TS]

01:47:48   and I think anybody who's ever tried to watch a video on You Tube that says you know Part one [TS]

01:47:52   and then you can see in the sidebar it says Part two Part seven Part six. When we get to get to part two. [TS]

01:48:02   There's no part three in the sidebar and you have to spend a few minutes. [TS]

01:48:04   Like this shouldn't be a problem the creator should be able to tell You Tube Here is the sequence of videos [TS]

01:48:10   but it doesn't it just doesn't work like that [TS]

01:48:12   and yeah I said to this guy you know why this is the case why don't you tell me why this is the case. [TS]

01:48:21   Because Netflix you've already paid for that already got your money [TS]

01:48:27   and they're all about just the pleasure of your experience. [TS]

01:48:30   You chib about about giving you [TS]

01:48:34   and I the control to shepherd the view is where we want to shepherd them next they're about shepherding them where they [TS]

01:48:40   want you to go next based on other priorities. Yeah you know I know you're right. [TS]

01:48:44   I know you're right you know this is what I found out you know this is something you you know this is what you say all [TS]

01:48:50   the time you need you need you know this is the case. [TS]

01:48:53   They don't they don't when you sit [TS]

01:48:55   and watch we hae way to know if they'll get more money from you watching Taylor Swift. [TS]

01:49:00   They just they they they they are trying to push it. [TS]

01:49:03   It's a constant battle between you [TS]

01:49:05   and I are trying to push the viewer to what we think they should watch next using our annotations and cards [TS]

01:49:11   and things as they're being ruined under our noses. [TS]

01:49:16   Vs you cheat using all of their pressure points to push people to go [TS]

01:49:20   and watch the thing that's going to make them lots of money [TS]

01:49:24   and suck you in to suck you into the black hole of crappiness. Well I do know what you're saying there. [TS]

01:49:30   In some sense I think You Tube is bad at both of these because if you're watching videos on a channel it will recommend [TS]

01:49:38   in the sidebar overwhelmingly more videos from that channel. [TS]

01:49:41   Yeah I can almost believe your theory more if the side bar was filled with nothing [TS]

01:49:46   but videos that are obviously making them a whole bunch of money. [TS]

01:49:48   Yeah but I know you're bad at both of these things you could optimize for money better but you don't. [TS]

01:49:54   Instead you're showing me a bunch of related things. But in the most unhelpful way ever. [TS]

01:50:00   I mean this is why I happen to be lucky that the kind of videos I make are are like tailor made for You Tube's [TS]

01:50:06   algorithm right that there's going to be a bunch of thumbnails in the sidebar. [TS]

01:50:10   They're all said to be great videos and it doesn't matter at all what order you watch them and for the most part. [TS]

01:50:14   Yeah like that's it's it works for me but I find it just infuriating and it's why I mean there are many reasons [TS]

01:50:22   but like my my You Tube watching has gone down [TS]

01:50:26   and I remember particularly like I'm just trying to fight this system so hard to watch stuff in order. [TS]

01:50:31   Yeah and it's just fighting against me the whole way. [TS]

01:50:35   I mean of course you know I don't need to tell you there are things like playlist and stuff like that [TS]

01:50:39   but they're half assed as well. Well yeah but here's the thing with the playlist. [TS]

01:50:44   I have tried to maintain a playlist of my videos in chronological order for people who do want to watch them in order [TS]

01:50:51   but this is. This is a hard problem and the playlists don't work very well either. [TS]

01:50:57   And someone like wheezy waiter I think is Larry is because I'm actually on Twitter a while back I was like this like [TS]

01:51:02   something somebody must've made a playlist somewhere of all the wheezy waiter videos in order [TS]

01:51:07   and it turns out he's uploaded so many videos that he broke in the the limit of how many videos I have in a place I [TS]

01:51:13   think it's two hundred. Yeah I mean I think he upwards two hundred videos in a month. [TS]

01:51:17   Yeah he's like you [TS]

01:51:18   and so then you know even even if you care about this stuff there's all these arbitrary limits that are going to just [TS]

01:51:25   be frustrating and the playlists won't remember where you were you know how I'm going to scroll back [TS]

01:51:29   and try to vaguely remember what the heck episode I was on and I know that you're right [TS]

01:51:34   but it is also frustrated they're not even they're not even optimizing for the money it seems like clearly in the [TS]

01:51:39   sidebar. So just let me watch things in order to remember where I was but they won't they won't ever do it. [TS]

01:51:49   Give any half assed complaints about You Tube I've just been blathering on about stuff most people don't care about you [TS]

01:51:55   want to hype up this topic it's irresponsibility may get off on now no no I wish I was. I was hype. [TS]

01:52:00   I was joking around [TS]

01:52:01   but you really have gone off on one I don't know why I if I worry about how interesting this is to people who just [TS]

01:52:12   learned why it's at the end. [TS]

01:52:13   Yeah yeah but no [TS]

01:52:14   and you know have you know two guys who make You Tube videos for a living because I went to them to people to talk [TS]

01:52:19   about this from time to time. [TS]

01:52:22   So yeah I'm really there are lots of things that I'm yeshivish just like difficult to do it in [TS]

01:52:30   and partly it's because I'm rubbish at computers as well [TS]

01:52:34   but like you know I have like I can put annotations on my videos in Safari that I can in Chrome So I like I do all this [TS]

01:52:44   work uploading a video and then I switch over to crime to put the annotations on at the end and [TS]

01:52:48   and I still haven't figured out why. And I can I can. [TS]

01:52:53   It's funny I just realized it may very well be the case that it just doesn't work in Safari because I do everything in [TS]

01:52:58   Chrome as well because I feel like it gives me a better shot at things working well. You click the far right. [TS]

01:53:05   Yeah I don't even know if it's over [TS]

01:53:07   but there are reasons why the reasons there are reasons why you know I have Safari and crime open constantly [TS]

01:53:12   and I have different things Logan in different browsers [TS]

01:53:14   and so I do need to have you know you have the whole fun of dealing with the million Google plus accounts. [TS]

01:53:21   Yeah I mean I have ridiculous number Google accounts. [TS]

01:53:25   There are there are lots of things there are lots of things that frustrate me about using each other [TS]

01:53:32   and I'm sure someone could someone and. [TS]

01:53:36   Oh I should go in you something like Vimeo and that not not because it's a viable option for me [TS]

01:53:41   but just so that I can see how the others do it so before I swag a fugitive I can say the others do it better. [TS]

01:53:47   Why can't you do it it is possible I don't know if it's possible [TS]

01:53:51   but it certainly it's certainly not a pleasurable experience but I have used you know a little bit a while ago. [TS]

01:54:00   And remember thinking that even years ago of him you know with all this is just nicer to me I was just the reverse. [TS]

01:54:06   Business model like we are before is more like that flick. [TS]

01:54:08   You pay them you know to use it so it is in their best interest to make sure that that from the creator's perspective [TS]

01:54:13   it's nice to use because that's where they get their money. [TS]

01:54:16   I also wonder why you can't look nicer than life in the US but then I remember that that's just a taste thing [TS]

01:54:23   and I look at sort of you know T. [TS]

01:54:24   Shirts that young people wear of the way that they design things and I think that that's rubbish. [TS]

01:54:28   They probably like the garish ness and messiness of the cheaper as I would like it to be more stripped back [TS]

01:54:33   and classier. [TS]

01:54:37   It could even be even the logo I mean the logo says it all doesn't it's like you know it's not it's iconic [TS]

01:54:44   but it's not classy. Yeah you shouldn't have words in your logo just like you shouldn't have words on your flag. [TS]

01:54:51   No words on logos no words on flag. [TS]

01:54:53   But I find it really hard talking about You Tube on the podcast like it's almost like any topic can come up with [TS]

01:55:01   or expect or not and like all these things pop into my head and my brain starts going off like popcorn [TS]

01:55:07   and I want to say this and I want to say that and I get all excited and have all these ideas [TS]

01:55:11   and then we start talking about You Tube which should be the thing I have the most probably is the thing I have the [TS]

01:55:17   most knowledge about and I should have a passion about it. I live on it every day you know I live on. [TS]

01:55:23   I've been way more time on You Tube than you so you know certainly the back end. [TS]

01:55:28   I spend way more time when you have the near me [TS]

01:55:31   and the soon as we start talking about it any podcast I just feel you can probably tell what it's really like nothing [TS]

01:55:37   really to say and I find it really hard to talk about on the phone [TS]

01:55:41   when it's just you know at the pub I don't find it so hard on the podcast when I've got in the back of my head [TS]

01:55:47   or you know what to say. I just it's like kryptonite for me I feel like I feel like a loose in America now. [TS]

01:55:54   I don't see what you mean. And even as I was talking I was thinking how boring I was. [TS]