Roderick on the Line

00:00:00 ◼   ► warning this episode of Roderick the [TS]

00:00:02 ◼   ► wine contains spoilers for popular [TS]

00:00:04 ◼   ► holiday characters candid discussions of [TS]

00:00:06 ◼   ► never nudes and graphic depictions of [TS]

00:00:08 ◼   ► penises and snack food listener [TS]

00:00:10 ◼   ► discretion is advised this episode of [TS]

00:00:13 ◼   ► Roderick on the line is brought to you [TS]

00:00:14 ◼   ► in part by Casper Casper an online [TS]

00:00:17 ◼   ► retailer of premium mattresses that you [TS]

00:00:19 ◼   ► can get delivered to your door for a [TS]

00:00:21 ◼   ► fraction of the price that you pay in [TS]

00:00:22 ◼   ► stores to learn more visit Casper calm / [TS]

00:00:25 ◼   ► supertrain and I braintree code for easy [TS]

00:00:29 ◼   ► online payments to learn more and get [TS]

00:00:31 ◼   ► your first fifty thousand dollars in [TS]

00:00:32 ◼   ► transactions fee-free visit braintree [TS]

00:00:35 ◼   ► payments dot-com / supertrain [TS]

00:00:41 ◼   ► hello hi John [TS]

00:00:46 ◼   ► I'm Merlin how's it going super good [TS]

00:00:49 ◼   ► super good super duper good i'm just [TS]

00:00:52 ◼   ► reading about Dexys Midnight Runners and [TS]

00:00:56 ◼   ► eating my new special breakfast [TS]

00:01:00 ◼   ► life hack oh that's because you want to [TS]

00:01:03 ◼   ► share i love to hear about both what's [TS]

00:01:04 ◼   ► your breakfast it is again a cup hungry [TS]

00:01:09 ◼   ► are you are you down with aegon organic [TS]

00:01:11 ◼   ► up have you ever had an egg in a couple [TS]

00:01:13 ◼   ► I as a very innovative basket [TS]

00:01:18 ◼   ► uh I don't think i have I mean it's [TS]

00:01:20 ◼   ► sending a basket who ya talkin in the [TS]

00:01:23 ◼   ► basket picking out picking out dough [TS]

00:01:25 ◼   ► ready dog bite kicking out picking up [TS]

00:01:28 ◼   ► picking up the chicken out [TS]

00:01:29 ◼   ► uh no your something I've been the [TS]

00:01:32 ◼   ► girl-scout thing where you make it you [TS]

00:01:33 ◼   ► use a shot glass today Christmas Girl [TS]

00:01:37 ◼   ► Scouts love shot glasses difficult girls [TS]

00:01:39 ◼   ► got well you know what this is a Girl [TS]

00:01:40 ◼   ► Scout lifehack if you use I was shot [TS]

00:01:42 ◼   ► glass of egg into a beer maybe they [TS]

00:01:46 ◼   ► called the gentleman's mimosa no [TS]

00:01:49 ◼   ► mayonnaise on the side know you I've [TS]

00:01:51 ◼   ► done a thing where you are oh I have a [TS]

00:01:53 ◼   ► whole method for this the garden have [TS]

00:01:54 ◼   ► time for but i don't think we knock out [TS]

00:01:56 ◼   ► some bread usually tell us to present [TS]

00:02:00 ◼   ► you make an egg in the middle of that [TS]

00:02:01 ◼   ► all your talk about toad-in-the-hole [TS]

00:02:02 ◼   ► total yes it's a show in the whole [TS]

00:02:09 ◼   ► regular basket or old gentleman's mimosa [TS]

00:02:12 ◼   ► uh ya know in a cup is totally different [TS]

00:02:18 ◼   ► i want to guess [TS]

00:02:19 ◼   ► alright go now I'll never get AAA get a [TS]

00:02:22 ◼   ► cup is see the thing is that to me that [TS]

00:02:24 ◼   ► feels like something a go-go yuppie in [TS]

00:02:27 ◼   ► the eighties would do [TS]

00:02:28 ◼   ► that's right with it involves like [TS]

00:02:30 ◼   ► poaching in a coffee cup in the [TS]

00:02:33 ◼   ► microwave you here right on it looks [TS]

00:02:36 ◼   ► like the music up here's what you do [TS]

00:02:39 ◼   ► oh my god this is about technology is [TS]

00:02:41 ◼   ► you here there it is and that's gonna [TS]

00:02:42 ◼   ► blow its gonna blow your mind it's gonna [TS]

00:02:44 ◼   ► blow everybody's mind moved everything [TS]

00:02:45 ◼   ► important out of the way you know what [TS]

00:02:47 ◼   ► I'm gonna I am after today I'm gonna get [TS]

00:02:50 ◼   ► convicted of being a serial killer cause [TS]

00:02:52 ◼   ► I money because of all the blood much [TS]

00:02:54 ◼   ► I'm gonna blow so many minds right now [TS]

00:02:56 ◼   ► that there's a trail of death across the [TS]

00:02:58 ◼   ► they will know me by my trail of death I [TS]

00:03:03 ◼   ► take an egg drop it in a coffee cup you [TS]

00:03:07 ◼   ► put a fork in an 80gb I'm sorry to [TS]

00:03:10 ◼   ► interrupt ed crack the egg [TS]

00:03:11 ◼   ► yes you do yes you do you crack the egg [TS]

00:03:14 ◼   ► into a thought these things are [TS]

00:03:15 ◼   ► important you gotta you gotta pick out [TS]

00:03:17 ◼   ► all the little uh Michelle parts because [TS]

00:03:19 ◼   ► you don't know how to crack an egg yeah [TS]

00:03:21 ◼   ► and then you you you stir it once with a [TS]

00:03:26 ◼   ► fork just quick just to like break the [TS]

00:03:29 ◼   ► yolk just break the yolk and just kind [TS]

00:03:31 ◼   ► of like Egyptian or just like a not not [TS]

00:03:33 ◼   ► three ships to jip jip jip set [TS]

00:03:37 ◼   ► definitely not scrambled in the [TS]

00:03:38 ◼   ► conventional sense hope you do most of [TS]

00:03:40 ◼   ► the egg is still intact as an egg you [TS]

00:03:42 ◼   ► just kind of break it a little in the [TS]

00:03:44 ◼   ► microwave for 30 seconds [TS]

00:03:46 ◼   ► oh my goodness you pull it out you go [TS]

00:03:50 ◼   ► now [TS]

00:03:51 ◼   ► jip jip jip three ships with a fork who [TS]

00:03:54 ◼   ► just just kind of scraping it off of the [TS]

00:03:57 ◼   ► sides and the bottom of the cup it's [TS]

00:03:59 ◼   ► still going to be a kind of a mirror [TS]

00:04:01 ◼   ► that said that's not so much for the for [TS]

00:04:03 ◼   ► the it's it makes it easier to enjoy [TS]

00:04:05 ◼   ► your just kind of sluicing it are your [TS]

00:04:07 ◼   ► carving it off the sides of your coffee [TS]

00:04:09 ◼   ► cup just getting off the off the sides [TS]

00:04:11 ◼   ► and you're just kind of giving it a [TS]

00:04:12 ◼   ► couple more stirs who 20 more seconds in [TS]

00:04:16 ◼   ► the microwave and my god bless that I [TS]

00:04:20 ◼   ► mean even taking into account the ship's [TS]

00:04:23 ◼   ► it's a minute [TS]

00:04:24 ◼   ► it's a flat minute and then perfect [TS]

00:04:27 ◼   ► silence they don't know where to begin [TS]

00:04:30 ◼   ► scrambly egg this changes so many things [TS]

00:04:33 ◼   ► for one thing I got tell you this is I [TS]

00:04:36 ◼   ► have the have the basic office cooking [TS]

00:04:39 ◼   ► set up which means i have the second [TS]

00:04:41 ◼   ► cheapest microwave from target and I [TS]

00:04:43 ◼   ► have the cot costco door refrigerator [TS]

00:04:45 ◼   ► that everybody has I've seen I've seen [TS]

00:04:48 ◼   ► your son have cast of the microwave is [TS]

00:04:51 ◼   ► almost certainly not dangerous know [TS]

00:04:55 ◼   ► right it's like probably eighty-four [TS]

00:04:59 ◼   ► percent certain that it's not irritating [TS]

00:05:03 ◼   ► right and I keep keep the door closed [TS]

00:05:06 ◼   ► you know what I'm not using it but this [TS]

00:05:09 ◼   ► would be for me this is not locate so do [TS]

00:05:12 ◼   ► you put in any kind of fixings do you do [TS]

00:05:15 ◼   ► video mixing i have i have you you know [TS]

00:05:18 ◼   ► a couple of little bit of cheddar [TS]

00:05:20 ◼   ► um I got a little bit of salt pepper a [TS]

00:05:22 ◼   ► little power with the salt-and-pepper oh [TS]

00:05:24 ◼   ► and if you put two eggs in a coffee cup [TS]

00:05:27 ◼   ► you're pushing your luck huh [TS]

00:05:29 ◼   ► but if you put two eggs and like a [TS]

00:05:31 ◼   ► slightly larger like say for instance of [TS]

00:05:33 ◼   ► beer stein then you know it's a mug that [TS]

00:05:39 ◼   ► makes like a meal it's a he seemed like [TS]

00:05:43 ◼   ► you could literally just drop a cracked [TS]

00:05:45 ◼   ► egg in there but i'm thinking also if [TS]

00:05:47 ◼   ► you put in some thinly-sliced like [TS]

00:05:50 ◼   ► shaved butter you were some serious [TS]

00:05:54 ◼   ► poaching on or like thinly sliced [TS]

00:05:57 ◼   ► prosciutto ham my goodness because cup [TS]

00:06:01 ◼   ► that would cook so fast cow and you [TS]

00:06:03 ◼   ► you've gotta pierce it because if you [TS]

00:06:05 ◼   ► don't the single explode [TS]

00:06:07 ◼   ► yeah sure what you what you doing the [TS]

00:06:08 ◼   ► whole time is is you know you're [TS]

00:06:10 ◼   ► managing the amount of time in there you [TS]

00:06:13 ◼   ► want to cook it without having the whole [TS]

00:06:15 ◼   ► thing explode [TS]

00:06:16 ◼   ► you gotta count for physics gotta come [TS]

00:06:18 ◼   ► from physics and science and as we know [TS]

00:06:20 ◼   ► sciences love love his music that's [TS]

00:06:24 ◼   ► record that's right so you [TS]

00:06:28 ◼   ► yeah you get 30 seconds just don't push [TS]

00:06:30 ◼   ► it okay and then a couple more ships [TS]

00:06:33 ◼   ► maybe that's when you add the cheese and [TS]

00:06:36 ◼   ► the prosciutto and then 20 more seconds [TS]

00:06:40 ◼   ► and that's all you need that's all you [TS]

00:06:41 ◼   ► want that so many good life hacks but i [TS]

00:06:43 ◼   ► gotta tell you i am i'm so gonna try [TS]

00:06:45 ◼   ► this [TS]

00:06:46 ◼   ► I'm trying to eat less bread and less [TS]

00:06:48 ◼   ► sugar i continue to struggle with that [TS]

00:06:50 ◼   ► because every convenience food in the [TS]

00:06:52 ◼   ► world mostly involves branch i'm not i [TS]

00:06:56 ◼   ► mean i'm not i don't it's not that I [TS]

00:06:57 ◼   ► won't eat bread and sugar I just don't [TS]

00:06:59 ◼   ► want it all the time it's about [TS]

00:07:01 ◼   ► something it's not all the time food and [TS]

00:07:03 ◼   ► then well but yeah and it's yeah John's [TS]

00:07:06 ◼   ► pyramid [TS]

00:07:07 ◼   ► yeah right but you uh you know the thing [TS]

00:07:09 ◼   ► is my problem is I forget to eat [TS]

00:07:11 ◼   ► I've had this for years and it's totally [TS]

00:07:14 ◼   ► at odds with my family who are snackers [TS]

00:07:16 ◼   ► sir [TS]

00:07:16 ◼   ► snackers I mean to eat dinner like a [TS]

00:07:18 ◼   ► snack and I'm like I'm like I'm like a [TS]

00:07:20 ◼   ► dad in the 52nd like I want to sit there [TS]

00:07:22 ◼   ► with the TV train have my Swanson's and [TS]

00:07:24 ◼   ► like you know [TS]

00:07:25 ◼   ► yeah yeah so for helping the green but [TS]

00:07:27 ◼   ► but i want to have stuff around that I [TS]

00:07:29 ◼   ► can eat quickly that isn't total junk [TS]

00:07:31 ◼   ► and eggs are eggs have been good to me [TS]

00:07:34 ◼   ► John [TS]

00:07:34 ◼   ► mm here's another thing about eggs the [TS]

00:07:37 ◼   ► people of our generation don't know I [TS]

00:07:40 ◼   ► ready yeah yeah legs do not need to be [TS]

00:07:43 ◼   ► refrigerated [TS]

00:07:44 ◼   ► but you can leave legs out on the [TS]

00:07:48 ◼   ► counter right all right all right all [TS]

00:07:50 ◼   ► right you could leave eggs out on the [TS]

00:07:51 ◼   ► counter [TS]

00:07:52 ◼   ► I i will take a certain amount of your [TS]

00:07:54 ◼   ► your unconventional outsider wisdom [TS]

00:07:57 ◼   ► about things because it does help a lot [TS]

00:07:58 ◼   ► of people as you see here today you're [TS]

00:08:00 ◼   ► telling you do not need to refrigerate [TS]

00:08:01 ◼   ► an egg [TS]

00:08:02 ◼   ► I'm saying that I mean I'm not saying [TS]

00:08:04 ◼   ► leave your eggs out on the counter for a [TS]

00:08:06 ◼   ► month [TS]

00:08:07 ◼   ► it's not like you live in Florida right [TS]

00:08:09 ◼   ► but you can put a basket of eggs on the [TS]

00:08:11 ◼   ► counter for a lot longer than you can [TS]

00:08:15 ◼   ► put up more than a day or a lot longer [TS]

00:08:17 ◼   ► you put container of cream on the [TS]

00:08:19 ◼   ► counter and the eggs are just fun [TS]

00:08:22 ◼   ► they're just fine where do you stand up [TS]

00:08:25 ◼   ► butter you leave butter out i do leave [TS]

00:08:29 ◼   ► you leave butter out on the counter [TS]

00:08:31 ◼   ► I leave it out on the counter covered in [TS]

00:08:34 ◼   ► a little butter dish on hot days when I [TS]

00:08:38 ◼   ► looked down in the butter is clearly [TS]

00:08:39 ◼   ► softening i'll put it in the fridge to [TS]

00:08:43 ◼   ► like put it back together my mom is of [TS]

00:08:46 ◼   ► the my mom has a strong feeling about [TS]

00:08:49 ◼   ► rancid honest [TS]

00:08:51 ◼   ► yeah I'm friend my friend dr. Don is [TS]

00:08:54 ◼   ► always I advising me on these things [TS]

00:08:56 ◼   ► because there's differences you get [TS]

00:08:57 ◼   ► spoilage you can get like there's a [TS]

00:09:00 ◼   ► difference there's different things that [TS]

00:09:01 ◼   ► happened to food is there isn't one way [TS]

00:09:03 ◼   ► that food can go bad there's a variety [TS]

00:09:04 ◼   ► of different ways and fat all fat based [TS]

00:09:08 ◼   ► foods will get rancid which affects the [TS]

00:09:13 ◼   ► taste of them huh [TS]

00:09:15 ◼   ► but not necessarily the edibility you [TS]

00:09:17 ◼   ► can eat rancid butter [TS]

00:09:19 ◼   ► yeah it's a bad word it's a bad punk [TS]

00:09:22 ◼   ► band you if i remember correctly done [TS]

00:09:24 ◼   ► you've enjoyed living on this particular [TS]

00:09:25 ◼   ► edge for a long time you your fella who [TS]

00:09:28 ◼   ► will see some leftover spaghetti and can [TS]

00:09:30 ◼   ► and just gonna go out it i feel like the [TS]

00:09:33 ◼   ► I feel like the the the bleeding edge of [TS]

00:09:36 ◼   ► spoiled food is a place that I'm you [TS]

00:09:40 ◼   ► know i am the chuck yeager of the sound [TS]

00:09:45 ◼   ► barrier of eating almost spoiled food if [TS]

00:09:49 ◼   ► you're out there you get the training at [TS]

00:09:51 ◼   ► the helmet I can see the curvature of [TS]

00:09:53 ◼   ► the earth [TS]

00:09:54 ◼   ► uh-huh I can you know I all I can hear [TS]

00:09:56 ◼   ► is the sound of my own breath in my [TS]

00:09:57 ◼   ► helmet and I more than the thing is my [TS]

00:10:01 ◼   ► you know my mom has this like farm gal [TS]

00:10:06 ◼   ► wisdom about things that's obviously now [TS]

00:10:10 ◼   ► transmuted through 50 years of 60 years [TS]

00:10:15 ◼   ► of city life right like if you were to [TS]

00:10:18 ◼   ► give my mom a live chicken and let's say [TS]

00:10:23 ◼   ► thank you for all and you could give her [TS]

00:10:26 ◼   ► a wallet that through ever mention why [TS]

00:10:27 ◼   ► still carry it but if you invent for the [TS]

00:10:30 ◼   ► sake of argument you gave this cyclist [TS]

00:10:32 ◼   ► in which country gal you get this you [TS]

00:10:34 ◼   ► get this gal I've chicken if you give [TS]

00:10:35 ◼   ► her a live chicken in a plastic fork and [TS]

00:10:38 ◼   ► you say we're hungry [TS]

00:10:40 ◼   ► would my mom yes she would be able to [TS]

00:10:45 ◼   ► turn that chicken into a food food [TS]

00:10:49 ◼   ► quality chicken it wouldn't be pretty [TS]

00:10:51 ◼   ► uh-huh but she has she has she has [TS]

00:10:55 ◼   ► knowledge at every step and she has a [TS]

00:10:59 ◼   ► lack of queasiness and a lack of [TS]

00:11:03 ◼   ► sentimentality both things is perfectly [TS]

00:11:05 ◼   ► suited to a live chicken so you know [TS]

00:11:07 ◼   ► she's seen she's seen she's seen her [TS]

00:11:12 ◼   ► grandfather killer killer chicken by [TS]

00:11:14 ◼   ► swinging it around by its head seemed a [TS]

00:11:18 ◼   ► fish it [TS]

00:11:19 ◼   ► she's seemed so see it keeps in the old [TS]

00:11:23 ◼   ► days apparently uh you know you have [TS]

00:11:27 ◼   ► this image of like granddad with a [TS]

00:11:28 ◼   ► hatchet on a stump out in the yard [TS]

00:11:31 ◼   ► uh-huh and you put the chicken on the [TS]

00:11:33 ◼   ► wii u know you pull the chicken's neck [TS]

00:11:35 ◼   ► across the stump and you whack it with [TS]

00:11:37 ◼   ► the hatchet and then you you know and [TS]

00:11:40 ◼   ► then [TS]

00:11:40 ◼   ► supposedly right at chicken run around [TS]

00:11:44 ◼   ► her blood spurting out this is all old [TS]

00:11:46 ◼   ► world forum imagery that for me that [TS]

00:11:48 ◼   ► totally rings true [TS]

00:11:49 ◼   ► yeah here's the chicken years the [TS]

00:11:50 ◼   ► headless chicken running around in the [TS]

00:11:52 ◼   ► yard all the kids screaming because it's [TS]

00:11:54 ◼   ► like it's like turning the training the [TS]

00:11:57 ◼   ► sprinkler on except it's chicken blood [TS]

00:11:59 ◼   ► check the sprinkler this is how farm [TS]

00:12:02 ◼   ► people live [TS]

00:12:03 ◼   ► yes but according to do any different [TS]

00:12:05 ◼   ► yeah well you know what do you do you [TS]

00:12:07 ◼   ► want chicken ya gonna have to make [TS]

00:12:09 ◼   ► sprinkler one of the amazing things that [TS]

00:12:11 ◼   ► my mom has told me is that they can't [TS]

00:12:13 ◼   ► chickens which is to say look like put [TS]

00:12:16 ◼   ► them up as they say they blew the whole [TS]

00:12:18 ◼   ► chicken into a jar [TS]

00:12:19 ◼   ► yeah and then candidate in this in the [TS]

00:12:22 ◼   ► old-style boil it and then stick a lid [TS]

00:12:24 ◼   ► on it like a man not a bell jar but I [TS]

00:12:26 ◼   ► like him not me [TS]

00:12:26 ◼   ► mason jar containing a canning jar belt [TS]

00:12:28 ◼   ► it was called you know damn well yeah [TS]

00:12:30 ◼   ► but not the Belgium but no not only [TS]

00:12:33 ◼   ► Sylvia Plath chicken [TS]

00:12:34 ◼   ► yeah we're not gonna bell jar about [TS]

00:12:35 ◼   ► we're gonna bell jar I wouldn't I [TS]

00:12:38 ◼   ► wouldn't leave so we applied to the [TS]

00:12:39 ◼   ► cooking and then you go into the base [TS]

00:12:41 ◼   ► get out of the kitchen and there's on [TS]

00:12:43 ◼   ► the wall in the in the larder are all [TS]

00:12:46 ◼   ► these canned whole chickens chickens in [TS]

00:12:48 ◼   ► a jar and uncooked well no cooked in the [TS]

00:12:52 ◼   ► sense that you have to cook it too [TS]

00:12:53 ◼   ► can I was sure good minutes then you [TS]

00:12:56 ◼   ► could put but you don't need to [TS]

00:12:59 ◼   ► you don't need to refrigerate them right [TS]

00:13:02 ◼   ► because they're pasteurized or something [TS]

00:13:04 ◼   ► some they're not pasteurized but look in [TS]

00:13:06 ◼   ► the canning process you have you have [TS]

00:13:09 ◼   ► eliminated that this might be a good [TS]

00:13:10 ◼   ► place to just mention in passing that as [TS]

00:13:14 ◼   ► much as John and I know about many many [TS]

00:13:15 ◼   ► things before before you go real deeply [TS]

00:13:18 ◼   ► into storing chicken in a warm room you [TS]

00:13:22 ◼   ► might want to do your own due diligence [TS]

00:13:23 ◼   ► on [TS]

00:13:24 ◼   ► yeah i'm going to assume that there were [TS]

00:13:25 ◼   ► storytellers work for people haha [TS]

00:13:28 ◼   ► there's a certain number of people [TS]

00:13:30 ◼   ► listening to this program will already [TS]

00:13:32 ◼   ► know all about the right now this down [TS]

00:13:33 ◼   ► okay so the chicken again getting put in [TS]

00:13:36 ◼   ► a jar [TS]

00:13:36 ◼   ► alright well are getting a lot i gotta [TS]

00:13:38 ◼   ► get larder so-so but she tells the story [TS]

00:13:41 ◼   ► of her grandfather and I don't [TS]

00:13:43 ◼   ► understand this I've never quite figured [TS]

00:13:44 ◼   ► out this is the type of question that [TS]

00:13:46 ◼   ► I'm so busy taking mental notes when my [TS]

00:13:49 ◼   ► mom is telling stories that they're [TS]

00:13:51 ◼   ► there [TS]

00:13:52 ◼   ► additional questions that I just don't [TS]

00:13:54 ◼   ► have time to ask because there's so much [TS]

00:13:56 ◼   ► hate there are so many other questions [TS]

00:13:58 ◼   ► working down but grandfather her [TS]

00:14:02 ◼   ► grandfather would take chickens in the [TS]

00:14:04 ◼   ► basement and chop their heads off and [TS]

00:14:07 ◼   ► play and so the chicken would run around [TS]

00:14:09 ◼   ► in the basement with the Bloods burning [TS]

00:14:11 ◼   ► and the kids all running like yeah well [TS]

00:14:15 ◼   ► this like headless zombie chicken is is [TS]

00:14:17 ◼   ► like spraying blood all over the room [TS]

00:14:20 ◼   ► and it's like why wouldn't you do in the [TS]

00:14:21 ◼   ► yard that is the question I didn't ask [TS]

00:14:24 ◼   ► because I was so stunned by this image [TS]

00:14:27 ◼   ► of like granddad killing changes my [TS]

00:14:32 ◼   ► great-grandfather killing chickens in [TS]

00:14:34 ◼   ► the basement and I'm you know in my mind [TS]

00:14:37 ◼   ► was like what is the it was probably not [TS]

00:14:39 ◼   ► like a rec room basement i'm guessing [TS]

00:14:41 ◼   ► it's not a finished basement with bumper [TS]

00:14:43 ◼   ► pool and Farrah Fawcett poster [TS]

00:14:44 ◼   ► no no the heart is open light and stuff [TS]

00:14:46 ◼   ► like that I think it's a classic [TS]

00:14:48 ◼   ► basement which is full of potatoes them [TS]

00:14:53 ◼   ► yes get anybody in America the club [TS]

00:14:55 ◼   ► classic basement it's going to do with a [TS]

00:14:58 ◼   ► nap I'll are they on shelves are the [TS]

00:15:00 ◼   ► organized in any way I think that there [TS]

00:15:02 ◼   ► was there's like a giant bin full of [TS]

00:15:05 ◼   ► root vegetables okay you get a nap in [TS]

00:15:07 ◼   ► there's maybe a hopper there's were [TS]

00:15:09 ◼   ► probably of way in which the coal man [TS]

00:15:12 ◼   ► can deliver Cole through an outside door [TS]

00:15:15 ◼   ► and similarly and call the potato man [TS]

00:15:17 ◼   ► well you're the potato man right in this [TS]

00:15:22 ◼   ► situation you and I would be potato man [TS]

00:15:24 ◼   ► but the coal man comes and there's a [TS]

00:15:26 ◼   ► little door he opens on the side of the [TS]

00:15:28 ◼   ► house and and cold goes down the coal [TS]

00:15:30 ◼   ► chute [TS]

00:15:31 ◼   ► ok into the cold up here upstairs and [TS]

00:15:34 ◼   ► you're busy cooking channel chicken [TS]

00:15:36 ◼   ► image are you don't have to be disturbed [TS]

00:15:38 ◼   ► you to call man [TS]

00:15:39 ◼   ► yeah that's right here the cold coming [TS]

00:15:41 ◼   ► down the coal chute he's got he's got [TS]

00:15:42 ◼   ► he's got like I got a whole truck [TS]

00:15:43 ◼   ► probably are cool card or a cold Lori [TS]

00:15:45 ◼   ► yeah i think it's probably cold truck by [TS]

00:15:47 ◼   ► this point [TS]

00:15:48 ◼   ► ok and then you've got shelves which are [TS]

00:15:53 ◼   ► full of jars with chickens and [TS]

00:15:57 ◼   ► what other what you you are put up [TS]

00:16:00 ◼   ► applause pleasant people put up some [TS]

00:16:02 ◼   ► vegetables put a lot of trips [TS]

00:16:04 ◼   ► well because all of your fruits and [TS]

00:16:05 ◼   ► vegetables they uh they arrived on the [TS]

00:16:08 ◼   ► scene when they are ripe and then [TS]

00:16:10 ◼   ► immediately began writing and you have [TS]

00:16:13 ◼   ► no there's no grocery where these things [TS]

00:16:16 ◼   ► are available all year round ship to you [TS]

00:16:18 ◼   ► from Chile and so you as soon as things [TS]

00:16:21 ◼   ► are ripe you immediately get this [TS]

00:16:23 ◼   ► assembly line process where you are [TS]

00:16:25 ◼   ► putting them in jars so that you can eat [TS]

00:16:28 ◼   ► them so you can survive the winter [TS]

00:16:30 ◼   ► ok and this is you know this is post [TS]

00:16:32 ◼   ► modern society for me to talk about the [TS]

00:16:34 ◼   ► forties here [TS]

00:16:35 ◼   ► yeah but you know all around the world [TS]

00:16:38 ◼   ► people still still doing this because [TS]

00:16:42 ◼   ► the winter is the hard time and there's [TS]

00:16:45 ◼   ► no supermarket right so she talks about [TS]

00:16:48 ◼   ► all this stuff and she and she has a [TS]

00:16:50 ◼   ► very low opinion of the sort of [TS]

00:16:52 ◼   ► back-to-the-landers she had a low [TS]

00:16:54 ◼   ► opinion of the back-to-the-landers in [TS]

00:16:55 ◼   ► the sixties who were like hippies [TS]

00:16:57 ◼   ► they're like we're going back to the [TS]

00:16:58 ◼   ► line foxfire people but she says she has [TS]

00:17:01 ◼   ► no higher regard for say an artisanal [TS]

00:17:03 ◼   ► pickles store but that stuff like the [TS]

00:17:06 ◼   ► twirly moustache stuff [TS]

00:17:08 ◼   ► yeah her feeling about it is do you know [TS]

00:17:10 ◼   ► how hard that is [TS]

00:17:11 ◼   ► you really have no sense of how hard [TS]

00:17:13 ◼   ► that is no one does that because it's [TS]

00:17:15 ◼   ► cute [TS]

00:17:16 ◼   ► maybe like selling at the dolls made out [TS]

00:17:17 ◼   ► of corn stalks that's not funny i think [TS]

00:17:19 ◼   ► that's funny to get you well people are [TS]

00:17:22 ◼   ► doing it i just opened Sunset magazine [TS]

00:17:23 ◼   ► the other day and they were like ugly [TS]

00:17:25 ◼   ► corns to call home for sale they're only [TS]

00:17:27 ◼   ► $425 but I but yeah she's like you know [TS]

00:17:31 ◼   ► I mean it's cute it's great to have like [TS]

00:17:33 ◼   ► six chickens and go out and and get eggs [TS]

00:17:35 ◼   ► from them like that's just adorable but [TS]

00:17:38 ◼   ► if you are really trying to live off of [TS]

00:17:40 ◼   ► those chickens your life becomes a like [TS]

00:17:44 ◼   ► a Hobbesian hellscape very fast [TS]

00:17:46 ◼   ► uh-huh and then you've got headless [TS]

00:17:48 ◼   ► chickens running around in your basement [TS]

00:17:49 ◼   ► and the kids are laughing with glee [TS]

00:17:52 ◼   ► because it's the only exciting thing [TS]

00:17:54 ◼   ► that's happened in weeks [TS]

00:17:56 ◼   ► so outside no she you know she talked [TS]

00:18:00 ◼   ► about like we would take the wet sheets [TS]

00:18:03 ◼   ► out and hang them in the in the winter [TS]

00:18:06 ◼   ► we would hang them on the on the [TS]

00:18:08 ◼   ► clotheslines the sopping wet sheets [TS]

00:18:10 ◼   ► because there's no better way to dry [TS]

00:18:13 ◼   ► them and then you'd go out after a while [TS]

00:18:16 ◼   ► with a with my co a tennis racket type [TS]

00:18:18 ◼   ► of whisker whipper if i can afford [TS]

00:18:21 ◼   ► tension there's a laundry racket laundry [TS]

00:18:24 ◼   ► racket that's right yeah but yeah they [TS]

00:18:26 ◼   ► it's not that they couldn't afford a [TS]

00:18:27 ◼   ► tennis racket but they wouldn't there's [TS]

00:18:29 ◼   ► no it's not like they're running tennis [TS]

00:18:30 ◼   ► courts and then word Ohio probably in [TS]

00:18:33 ◼   ► 1940 and then so they go and they beat [TS]

00:18:35 ◼   ► the sheets and the ice would break off [TS]

00:18:38 ◼   ► and that was how you drive [TS]

00:18:41 ◼   ► that's how you drive your laundry [TS]

00:18:42 ◼   ► humidity solo when it's that cold [TS]

00:18:44 ◼   ► yeah you let the ice freeze and then you [TS]

00:18:46 ◼   ► break the ice off of it and you know wha [TS]

00:18:48 ◼   ► huh [TS]

00:18:50 ◼   ► anyway I didn't mean to I didn't mean to [TS]

00:18:52 ◼   ► go so far so fast into farm life [TS]

00:18:56 ◼   ► no no I think you and I know so much [TS]

00:18:58 ◼   ► about as we do about microwaving eggs [TS]

00:19:00 ◼   ► and coffee cups but yea different you [TS]

00:19:04 ◼   ► know [TS]

00:19:04 ◼   ► also all by way of saying and butter [TS]

00:19:08 ◼   ► eggs eggs eggs and butter [TS]

00:19:11 ◼   ► you left him out on the counter and he [TS]

00:19:13 ◼   ► left a big pot of like lard on the stove [TS]

00:19:17 ◼   ► whenever you needed to cook an egg you [TS]

00:19:20 ◼   ► just you didn't use butter huh [TS]

00:19:23 ◼   ► dip the spoon in the large pot and fry [TS]

00:19:26 ◼   ► the egg in lard and I think that's [TS]

00:19:29 ◼   ► something that's been lost we're not [TS]

00:19:30 ◼   ► even we don't even know what eggs taste [TS]

00:19:32 ◼   ► like we're not even living because I've [TS]

00:19:35 ◼   ► had I've had eggs and sometimes in fancy [TS]

00:19:39 ◼   ► artisanal places but especially in New [TS]

00:19:43 ◼   ► Zealand in canadia man they know from [TS]

00:19:46 ◼   ► makes you realize the eggs we get here [TS]

00:19:48 ◼   ► seem really kind of light yellow now [TS]

00:19:52 ◼   ► when you get a nice like a dark orange [TS]

00:19:54 ◼   ► egg look at those like a different egg [TS]

00:19:56 ◼   ► mmm mmm those new zealand eggs famous [TS]

00:20:00 ◼   ► well they also got incredible bacon [TS]

00:20:03 ◼   ► there i mean the bacon is like a TV on [TS]

00:20:04 ◼   ► Irish bacon it's amazing it's it's like [TS]

00:20:07 ◼   ► a little big inhale [TS]

00:20:08 ◼   ► Hamish bacon steak no Hamish bacon I [TS]

00:20:11 ◼   ► loved his books he was great with a lost [TS]

00:20:13 ◼   ► aztec camera right Hamish bacon know [TS]

00:20:15 ◼   ► that was his father ok so mr. don't get [TS]

00:20:18 ◼   ► me started thinking is my father [TS]

00:20:20 ◼   ► actually actually actually it's a bacon [TS]

00:20:25 ◼   ► scenes monster [TS]

00:20:26 ◼   ► mm uh now i know the Canadians have 40 [TS]

00:20:29 ◼   ► different kinds of bacon is that right [TS]

00:20:31 ◼   ► yeah four different kinds of bacon [TS]

00:20:33 ◼   ► they don't call a Canadian bacon [TS]

00:20:35 ◼   ► obviously just like that silly host [TS]

00:20:38 ◼   ► today did call them UK Wham [TS]

00:20:41 ◼   ► yeah in England they do know what about [TS]

00:20:44 ◼   ► Charlotte Charlotte into a one time I [TS]

00:20:46 ◼   ► think they were legally required to be [TS]

00:20:47 ◼   ► charlatans UK that's right and don't [TS]

00:20:50 ◼   ► know what about dinosaur jr. is that [TS]

00:20:51 ◼   ► legal illegal they were originally there [TS]

00:20:53 ◼   ► was some like old band called dinosaur [TS]

00:20:55 ◼   ► and so they had to call themselves [TS]

00:20:56 ◼   ► Dinosaur Jr I think with no period [TS]

00:20:59 ◼   ► yeah I think dinosaur if i recall was [TS]

00:21:02 ◼   ► like one of those German bands like can [TS]

00:21:05 ◼   ► or com film festival [TS]

00:21:08 ◼   ► yeah where they you know it was like [TS]

00:21:10 ◼   ► rockets but we pop and one your party [TS]

00:21:12 ◼   ► resisted the balloon guitar [TS]

00:21:16 ◼   ► yeah yeah I thought it was like a good [TS]

00:21:19 ◼   ► old hippie band but in any case they [TS]

00:21:20 ◼   ► were doing [TS]

00:21:21 ◼   ► that's what the hippies were really [TS]

00:21:22 ◼   ► doing the hippies were really doing [TS]

00:21:24 ◼   ► krautrock yeah absolutely not [TS]

00:21:27 ◼   ► ninety-nine percent of all hippies were [TS]

00:21:29 ◼   ► actually doing crowd didn't know it John [TS]

00:21:31 ◼   ► it's pre pre crowd so you're saying this [TS]

00:21:34 ◼   ► is that it's like guys like calculus [TS]

00:21:36 ◼   ► like we are just kind of discovered in [TS]

00:21:37 ◼   ► are we all we all got the motor sound if [TS]

00:21:40 ◼   ► you're living in like West Virginia you [TS]

00:21:42 ◼   ► might find yourself playing Crockett not [TS]

00:21:43 ◼   ► know it might find yourself living in a [TS]

00:21:45 ◼   ► shotgun Shack who um cheap humans do is [TS]

00:21:49 ◼   ► annoy sure they're pretty spectacular [TS]

00:21:53 ◼   ► never listened to I'd ensues grounds it [TS]

00:21:55 ◼   ► was on salad yeah I mean I 5 i'm aware [TS]

00:21:57 ◼   ► of them but I was see I don't it's weird [TS]

00:22:00 ◼   ► it's like to me like like say for [TS]

00:22:02 ◼   ► example kraftwerk is the kraut rock as [TS]

00:22:05 ◼   ► nirvana is to grunge where it's one of [TS]

00:22:07 ◼   ► those things where i go from you really [TS]

00:22:08 ◼   ► think of that like feels into enough [TS]

00:22:10 ◼   ► krautrock a craft work doesn't really [TS]

00:22:12 ◼   ► seem like rock band I think noi and and [TS]

00:22:15 ◼   ► can are more like lastly what i would [TS]

00:22:17 ◼   ► consider a crock man yeah i think what [TS]

00:22:19 ◼   ► you man I don't mean to paraphrase you [TS]

00:22:21 ◼   ► or [TS]

00:22:22 ◼   ► to correct you not at all lord knows but [TS]

00:22:24 ◼   ► a craft work is to krautrock as nirvana [TS]

00:22:28 ◼   ► is too Punk because Nirvana basically [TS]

00:22:30 ◼   ► defined groans which didn't exist before [TS]

00:22:33 ◼   ► i took the acct I never took the SATs so [TS]

00:22:35 ◼   ► I'm not very good at these things i feel [TS]

00:22:38 ◼   ► like i've always thought I said to you [TS]

00:22:39 ◼   ► for years now the thing is like it [TS]

00:22:41 ◼   ► wasn't even with all this time behind at [TS]

00:22:43 ◼   ► the time [TS]

00:22:44 ◼   ► Nirvana sounded nothing to me like the [TS]

00:22:46 ◼   ► canonical we talked to so many fucking [TS]

00:22:48 ◼   ► times [TS]

00:22:49 ◼   ► Nirvanix at the time did not sound to me [TS]

00:22:50 ◼   ► like other things that were considered [TS]

00:22:52 ◼   ► grunge when it you know i mean even now [TS]

00:22:54 ◼   ► you back and listen you're like there's [TS]

00:22:56 ◼   ► some stuff like the bleach era stuff we [TS]

00:22:58 ◼   ► go yeah I can kind of see that but [TS]

00:22:59 ◼   ► they're closer to like a Mudhoney to me [TS]

00:23:01 ◼   ► dance like closer than they are like a [TS]

00:23:03 ◼   ► pearl jam but this is the thing google [TS]

00:23:06 ◼   ► the word grunge and we have talked about [TS]

00:23:08 ◼   ► this a lot yeah the word grunge was a [TS]

00:23:10 ◼   ► was a retroactive Appalachian so Nirvana [TS]

00:23:15 ◼   ► didn't sound like grunge but until [TS]

00:23:17 ◼   ► Nirvana there was no such thing as [TS]

00:23:19 ◼   ► crunch right i mean it's not like Mark [TS]

00:23:21 ◼   ► arm ever describe i mean he actually [TS]

00:23:23 ◼   ► coined the term but he did it [TS]

00:23:25 ◼   ► sarcastically [TS]

00:23:26 ◼   ► it's in some ways not totally dissimilar [TS]

00:23:28 ◼   ► from the beatles and the british [TS]

00:23:30 ◼   ► invasion because the British Invasion [TS]

00:23:32 ◼   ► bands don't sound that much like that [TS]

00:23:35 ◼   ► for the beatles except for the ones who [TS]

00:23:36 ◼   ► basically just sound like the Beatles [TS]

00:23:38 ◼   ► who don't mean like that you do you [TS]

00:23:40 ◼   ► consider the animals and the kinks let [TS]

00:23:42 ◼   ► me know animals in the kinks to me are [TS]

00:23:43 ◼   ► British Invasion bands but like Paul [TS]

00:23:45 ◼   ► Revere and the Raiders a great band [TS]

00:23:47 ◼   ► Rory storm in the hurt go storming the [TS]

00:23:49 ◼   ► Hurricanes 30 [TS]

00:23:51 ◼   ► well you know like what about die toten [TS]

00:23:55 ◼   ► hosen die toten hosen ah you know see I [TS]

00:23:57 ◼   ► think that that I'm gonna call that a [TS]

00:23:58 ◼   ► canary trap i think that might not be a [TS]

00:23:59 ◼   ► band i think you're testing me die toten [TS]

00:24:03 ◼   ► hosen huh actually meet saying that make [TS]

00:24:05 ◼   ► it real [TS]

00:24:06 ◼   ► it means the dead trousers ok for the [TS]

00:24:09 ◼   ► deadpan something i don't know you know [TS]

00:24:11 ◼   ► I don't know if germans call their pants [TS]

00:24:13 ◼   ► trousers they call him home yet pants [TS]

00:24:14 ◼   ► underwear chosen chosen this is that the [TS]

00:24:18 ◼   ► superclass of lower body which covers [TS]

00:24:21 ◼   ► yeah it's all hosen husband wasn't all [TS]

00:24:23 ◼   ► that but but die toten hosen literally [TS]

00:24:26 ◼   ► all the way down foo I toten hosen are [TS]

00:24:28 ◼   ► the tote toten hosen [TS]

00:24:31 ◼   ► are you not a professor doesn't mean [TS]

00:24:35 ◼   ► that apparently dead [TS]

00:24:37 ◼   ► oh ok and so a advanced advanced [TS]

00:24:42 ◼   ► placement the dead milkmen and I see [TS]

00:24:44 ◼   ► other too jokey name [TS]

00:24:45 ◼   ► yeah but about pans that's a very short [TS]

00:24:48 ◼   ► name is German things go well and i'm [TS]

00:24:50 ◼   ► not even sure like you know what what [TS]

00:24:51 ◼   ► constitutes a joke in german band names [TS]

00:24:54 ◼   ► I don't have not even sure what day [TS]

00:24:56 ◼   ► toten hosen are like am but they might [TS]

00:24:59 ◼   ► even still be a band [TS]

00:25:01 ◼   ► hi I'm it's like they're the Scorpions [TS]

00:25:04 ◼   ► of weird funky i'm from German hip-hop [TS]

00:25:12 ◼   ► maybe i'm not i don't know that much [TS]

00:25:13 ◼   ► about Daytona knows but I do know that I [TS]

00:25:15 ◼   ► bet you know more than most people [TS]

00:25:16 ◼   ► according to google translate die toten [TS]

00:25:19 ◼   ► hosen translates to the dead pants I'll [TS]

00:25:21 ◼   ► see you there is that means i have had a [TS]

00:25:24 ◼   ► Hungarian friend that was Barry into die [TS]

00:25:27 ◼   ► toten hosen ok and actually traveled [TS]

00:25:29 ◼   ► around with them but he was I don't [TS]

00:25:33 ◼   ► think that they have it like a Grateful [TS]

00:25:35 ◼   ► Dead vibe at all but they do have a [TS]

00:25:37 ◼   ► Grateful Dead component which is that [TS]

00:25:39 ◼   ► people travel around with them and sell [TS]

00:25:42 ◼   ► things in the parking lot at least my [TS]

00:25:44 ◼   ► friend did and what he sold in the [TS]

00:25:47 ◼   ► parking lot he had a friend my friend's [TS]

00:25:50 ◼   ► name was our pod which is a popular [TS]

00:25:53 ◼   ► Hungarian name him and his friend was [TS]

00:25:56 ◼   ► named Zoltan an interesting name is a [TS]

00:26:00 ◼   ► great name and Zoltan actually was a [TS]

00:26:03 ◼   ► Hungarian living in Romania and Zoltan [TS]

00:26:05 ◼   ► made magic tricks out of matchboxes that [TS]

00:26:11 ◼   ► he would sell it was like four kids [TS]

00:26:13 ◼   ► ready take an aftermarket a matchbox and [TS]

00:26:16 ◼   ► and and turn into a magic trick [TS]

00:26:18 ◼   ► yeah exactly like it's a matchbox and [TS]

00:26:21 ◼   ► then I think it's a thing where because [TS]

00:26:23 ◼   ► matchboxes still a big industry in [TS]

00:26:26 ◼   ► Romania and he would make a magic trick [TS]

00:26:31 ◼   ► out i think it's one of those things [TS]

00:26:32 ◼   ► where you put a quarter in one side and [TS]

00:26:34 ◼   ► then you'd close the matchbox and then [TS]

00:26:35 ◼   ► you'd push it out the other side and [TS]

00:26:37 ◼   ► like where the quarter go classic type [TS]

00:26:39 ◼   ► of like here and you'd sell that for a [TS]

00:26:41 ◼   ► couple of settings or what [TS]

00:26:44 ◼   ► over at the at the parking lot of the [TS]

00:26:46 ◼   ► die toten hosen show hmm [TS]

00:26:48 ◼   ► John word a soundtrack let me see if I [TS]

00:26:51 ◼   ► can get you hear that [TS]

00:26:52 ◼   ► ok velvet elvis dressing was out will ya [TS]

00:26:57 ◼   ► some dude who just have say that that [TS]

00:27:00 ◼   ► was a google translate lady [TS]

00:27:01 ◼   ► Oh South the trick double-quick at the [TS]

00:27:04 ◼   ► Daytona nosin but then our pod didn't do [TS]

00:27:08 ◼   ► magic tricks he made like little what am [TS]

00:27:12 ◼   ► I gonna say friendship bracelets know [TS]

00:27:13 ◼   ► because he he didn't believe in [TS]

00:27:15 ◼   ► friendship [TS]

00:27:16 ◼   ► ok something else something harder [TS]

00:27:18 ◼   ► darker haha oh ok it's like the opposite [TS]

00:27:23 ◼   ► of of a grand flu nor it's like you are [TS]

00:27:27 ◼   ► its people you just shouldn't be with [TS]

00:27:28 ◼   ► its Appetit balloon empty feeling [TS]

00:27:31 ◼   ► ah latifah loon the people haha so up [TS]

00:27:35 ◼   ► but we had friendship we believe in [TS]

00:27:37 ◼   ► friendship the three of us and I never [TS]

00:27:40 ◼   ► want to die toten hosen concert but i [TS]

00:27:42 ◼   ► did play many times with the little [TS]

00:27:45 ◼   ► contraptions that they built out of like [TS]

00:27:49 ◼   ► kind of found materials people who enjoy [TS]

00:27:51 ◼   ► die toten hosen they find themselves [TS]

00:27:54 ◼   ► thinking you know this is a good show [TS]

00:27:55 ◼   ► i'm having fun as always I a I enjoy [TS]

00:27:58 ◼   ► hearing this music I could use a key [TS]

00:27:59 ◼   ► matchbox magic trick [TS]

00:28:01 ◼   ► yeah you're coming into the show you're [TS]

00:28:03 ◼   ► going out of the show and you're like [TS]

00:28:04 ◼   ► sure what am I going to get my young [TS]

00:28:06 ◼   ► message something for the kids yeah but [TS]

00:28:10 ◼   ► i also i feel like maybe it was the [TS]

00:28:12 ◼   ► maybe they were selling those things we [TS]

00:28:14 ◼   ► had a pretty complicated relationship [TS]

00:28:16 ◼   ► and I did actually go to a couple of [TS]

00:28:18 ◼   ► European Ren Faires boy with with these [TS]

00:28:23 ◼   ► two and they set up a little card table [TS]

00:28:26 ◼   ► and we're selling their wares at the ren [TS]

00:28:29 ◼   ► faire so it was it was a thing that they [TS]

00:28:32 ◼   ► did kind of a circuit and while they [TS]

00:28:34 ◼   ► were selling their stuff i kinda just [TS]

00:28:37 ◼   ► like it wandering around the ren faire [TS]

00:28:39 ◼   ► it's not so much about whether it's [TS]

00:28:41 ◼   ► precisely suitable for the topic of a [TS]

00:28:44 ◼   ► given event it's more like how you are [TS]

00:28:47 ◼   ► able to sell things [TS]

00:28:48 ◼   ► yeah right like we have these things we [TS]

00:28:50 ◼   ► need money [TS]

00:28:51 ◼   ► we actually don't have these things we [TS]

00:28:54 ◼   ► are going to make these things in order [TS]

00:28:55 ◼   ► to make enough money to [TS]

00:28:57 ◼   ► go to the Daytona nose and shows little [TS]

00:29:01 ◼   ► came around to by Ramones themed [TS]

00:29:04 ◼   ► clothing items [TS]

00:29:05 ◼   ► ok which were also popular at least with [TS]

00:29:07 ◼   ► our pod as all tendon he wasn't into the [TS]

00:29:11 ◼   ► remotes the same ok ok anyway so yeah we [TS]

00:29:14 ◼   ► traveled together for a little while I [TS]

00:29:16 ◼   ► went to a couple of Ren Faires heard a [TS]

00:29:18 ◼   ► lot of stories about the you know the [TS]

00:29:21 ◼   ► like heavy metal parking lot [TS]

00:29:24 ◼   ► alternate life that they would lead but [TS]

00:29:27 ◼   ► I didn't have any first-hand experience [TS]

00:29:30 ◼   ► with it i did try to meet our pod [TS]

00:29:32 ◼   ► outside of Vienna one time for a [TS]

00:29:34 ◼   ► Metallica concert and when we arrived at [TS]

00:29:36 ◼   ► the site of the metallica concert there [TS]

00:29:39 ◼   ► was no one there giant empty field I was [TS]

00:29:42 ◼   ► coming from one direction he was coming [TS]

00:29:44 ◼   ► from the other we met at the appointed [TS]

00:29:47 ◼   ► time I said what the fuck i spent a lot [TS]

00:29:52 ◼   ► of time and effort getting to this field [TS]

00:29:53 ◼   ► there's no Metallica concert here and he [TS]

00:29:56 ◼   ► said it was cancelled like a month ago [TS]

00:29:59 ◼   ► oh no but neither one of us had any way [TS]

00:30:03 ◼   ► of contacting the other one he came [TS]

00:30:05 ◼   ► anyway [TS]

00:30:06 ◼   ► well but he didn't know either oh so [TS]

00:30:09 ◼   ► there was no way if one of us had known [TS]

00:30:11 ◼   ► we could contact the other but [TS]

00:30:12 ◼   ► apparently there was also no way to know [TS]

00:30:14 ◼   ► that this thing had been canceled [TS]

00:30:16 ◼   ► because we have this was pre cellphone [TS]

00:30:19 ◼   ► is a simple simple country ways so we [TS]

00:30:22 ◼   ► just were like you know riding our [TS]

00:30:24 ◼   ► little horse carts or whatever too this [TS]

00:30:25 ◼   ► field what you do instead the jam we [TS]

00:30:28 ◼   ► went to we went back to Vienna we hung [TS]

00:30:31 ◼   ► out a and there was a there was actually [TS]

00:30:34 ◼   ► a summer concert in vienna on one of the [TS]

00:30:40 ◼   ► little islands that are in the middle of [TS]

00:30:42 ◼   ► the sort of old Danube because you know [TS]

00:30:45 ◼   ► they channeled the Danube a long time [TS]

00:30:49 ◼   ► ago and made it into a giant sort of [TS]

00:30:52 ◼   ► super fast moving death canal [TS]

00:30:55 ◼   ► oh really yeah but you have a lot of [TS]

00:30:58 ◼   ► meetings to do something like that [TS]

00:31:00 ◼   ► well see the Austrians were really good [TS]

00:31:01 ◼   ► at that stuff they were tall hat mmm [TS]

00:31:03 ◼   ► very tall boots and they were like what [TS]

00:31:06 ◼   ► but you know the reason that Vienna is [TS]

00:31:08 ◼   ► where [TS]

00:31:09 ◼   ► is let me not just I don't want to just [TS]

00:31:12 ◼   ► go completely he was helping you get [TS]

00:31:13 ◼   ► some context because I don't you just [TS]

00:31:15 ◼   ► gotta I got nowhere with how the dangers [TS]

00:31:18 ◼   ► got rerouted i mentioned a lot of [TS]

00:31:19 ◼   ► meetings you get cultural significance [TS]

00:31:20 ◼   ► to get you can have to have some [TS]

00:31:22 ◼   ► geographers in right you get songs about [TS]

00:31:24 ◼   ► right right you got some-some probably [TS]

00:31:27 ◼   ► of volcanologist well so here's the [TS]

00:31:29 ◼   ► Danube okay i see it ok alright start it [TS]

00:31:32 ◼   ► starts up in Germany that's under comes [TS]

00:31:34 ◼   ► down okay and it gets to this sort of [TS]

00:31:37 ◼   ► plane where Vienna is now and it's sort [TS]

00:31:41 ◼   ► of the mountains are over here the other [TS]

00:31:43 ◼   ► mountains are over here but there's this [TS]

00:31:45 ◼   ► big wide flat plane and the Danube like [TS]

00:31:47 ◼   ► went spider doubt into a huge sort of [TS]

00:31:52 ◼   ► Delta but you know it's nowhere near its [TS]

00:31:55 ◼   ► headwaters nowhere near the mouth of it [TS]

00:31:57 ◼   ► so it's not a delta like you would like [TS]

00:32:00 ◼   ► the Mississippi Delta where the Blues [TS]

00:32:02 ◼   ► were formed right it's just a big [TS]

00:32:05 ◼   ► styling Klaus does blouse [TS]

00:32:08 ◼   ► it's a dozen ecp blouse a it's a it's [TS]

00:32:14 ◼   ► just an area where the river separates [TS]

00:32:17 ◼   ► out into a thousand little rivulets and [TS]

00:32:20 ◼   ► a big swampy morass yeah and so that's [TS]

00:32:24 ◼   ► no place for a guitar swampy morass well [TS]

00:32:26 ◼   ► known in that particular one [TS]

00:32:28 ◼   ► oh I see what you're saying so it's not [TS]

00:32:29 ◼   ► so there's no Viennese blues what kind [TS]

00:32:31 ◼   ► of others a Viennese blues then also [TS]

00:32:34 ◼   ► they don't have any black people there i [TS]

00:32:35 ◼   ► don't think a soccer tort is what the [TS]

00:32:38 ◼   ► big event Viennese blues soccer I see is [TS]

00:32:41 ◼   ► a Vietnamese no no I think at siena [TS]

00:32:43 ◼   ► calling me a call ok sit Germany up here [TS]

00:32:47 ◼   ► you got this guy over here [TS]

00:32:48 ◼   ► that's right though in the olden times [TS]

00:32:50 ◼   ► as you're traveling around the Danube [TS]

00:32:52 ◼   ► would be a very difficult river to get [TS]

00:32:54 ◼   ► across this very large river but here it [TS]

00:32:57 ◼   ► its it like spread out into this wide [TS]

00:33:01 ◼   ► swampy area and it enabled you to get [TS]

00:33:05 ◼   ► across it because i had to do was get [TS]

00:33:07 ◼   ► across this little river and then that [TS]

00:33:09 ◼   ► little river [TS]

00:33:10 ◼   ► so it was a it was a place that even [TS]

00:33:14 ◼   ► though it was a kind of swampy pestilent [TS]

00:33:16 ◼   ► place it was a spot that you could you [TS]

00:33:19 ◼   ► and your camp train could get across the [TS]

00:33:21 ◼   ► river so Vienna was situated there as a [TS]

00:33:26 ◼   ► sort of like this was a trading [TS]

00:33:27 ◼   ► crossroads and then as the Austrians [TS]

00:33:30 ◼   ► really gathered themselves into the [TS]

00:33:32 ◼   ► uniform wearing giant cement eagle [TS]

00:33:36 ◼   ► building Empire people of of much later [TS]

00:33:40 ◼   ► who they were like we did we no longer [TS]

00:33:42 ◼   ► want a pestilence swamp here and so they [TS]

00:33:46 ◼   ► channeled they channeled and channeled [TS]

00:33:48 ◼   ► and channel the Danube isn't this in [TS]

00:33:50 ◼   ► twentieth-century no prior to the 20th [TS]

00:33:52 ◼   ► century no kidding [TS]

00:33:54 ◼   ► they were doing this work a long channel [TS]

00:33:55 ◼   ► channel channel sounds like a lot of [TS]

00:33:57 ◼   ► work in that in the 19th century i might [TS]

00:33:59 ◼   ► it was it started even before that Kenny [TS]

00:34:02 ◼   ► yeah they were saying like let's get [TS]

00:34:04 ◼   ► this river into some kind of ship shape [TS]

00:34:07 ◼   ► and as a channel that of course the [TS]

00:34:10 ◼   ► river became deep and fast moving but [TS]

00:34:14 ◼   ► that wasn't their problem and then all [TS]

00:34:17 ◼   ► the little spidery Little rivers that [TS]

00:34:20 ◼   ► used to make up the Danube wide spot [TS]

00:34:23 ◼   ► became little ponds longfin pawns who [TS]

00:34:29 ◼   ► and on one of the islands in the middle [TS]

00:34:32 ◼   ► of one of those ponds are pot and I [TS]

00:34:34 ◼   ► happened upon wait for it [TS]

00:34:36 ◼   ► sheryl crow concert [TS]

00:34:39 ◼   ► yeah she was playing with a oh what what [TS]

00:34:50 ◼   ► why do I one is it is it a band or [TS]

00:34:52 ◼   ► artist did that we would know [TS]

00:34:53 ◼   ► yes it's joe cocker Congress opening for [TS]

00:34:57 ◼   ► sheryl crow know Joe Cocker and chokro [TS]

00:34:59 ◼   ► were somehow playing together everything [TS]

00:35:00 ◼   ► co-headlining I think Cheryl might have [TS]

00:35:03 ◼   ► been opening for Joe but they were [TS]

00:35:04 ◼   ► playing together okay here onstage at [TS]

00:35:07 ◼   ► the same time it was a great sound [TS]

00:35:08 ◼   ► unusual things just kind of run into it [TS]

00:35:11 ◼   ► was you and the only way that we've been [TS]

00:35:14 ◼   ► we were walking along and there was [TS]

00:35:16 ◼   ► music playing and you know that's like [TS]

00:35:17 ◼   ► austria in the summer people are out [TS]

00:35:20 ◼   ► nude sunbathing you [TS]

00:35:22 ◼   ► huh unicycling and all the things they [TS]

00:35:24 ◼   ► do that for many people love to walk [TS]

00:35:26 ◼   ► they are big big big walkers and nude [TS]

00:35:30 ◼   ► they like to walk nude [TS]

00:35:32 ◼   ► yeah they're nudes there you know if you [TS]

00:35:35 ◼   ► are you familiar with the concept of a [TS]

00:35:36 ◼   ► never-nude I just from a TV program [TS]

00:35:39 ◼   ► that's not a real thing that i sent ya [TS]

00:35:41 ◼   ► know you have never knew that's [TS]

00:35:44 ◼   ► different from Mormons from sorry [TS]

00:35:46 ◼   ► latter-day church Saints better day [TS]

00:35:47 ◼   ► Saints scientists different states same [TS]

00:35:50 ◼   ► same just yeah there are no no that's a [TS]

00:35:53 ◼   ► different thing they have special [TS]

00:35:54 ◼   ► underwear as we know you're not just [TS]

00:35:56 ◼   ► making it to spice folk a joke [TS]

00:35:58 ◼   ► no never nudes are kind of people I'm [TS]

00:36:03 ◼   ► sure there are some never news listening [TS]

00:36:04 ◼   ► to our program who just never want never [TS]

00:36:08 ◼   ► will ever let anyone else ever see them [TS]

00:36:10 ◼   ► nude never-nude ever announced never no [TS]

00:36:13 ◼   ► never no never no never needs yeah yeah [TS]

00:36:15 ◼   ► and but I mean they did their part of [TS]

00:36:16 ◼   ► the quiet quietly part of the the [TS]

00:36:18 ◼   ► lifestyle [TS]

00:36:19 ◼   ► yeah it's a thing where is it a [TS]

00:36:21 ◼   ► lifestyle John might be normative mmm I [TS]

00:36:23 ◼   ► don't think that this is the thing about [TS]

00:36:24 ◼   ► never nudes my senses that they do not [TS]

00:36:26 ◼   ► congregate oh so they're never knew [TS]

00:36:29 ◼   ► never knew then that solitude never [TS]

00:36:32 ◼   ► never need solitude never-nude solitude [TS]

00:36:34 ◼   ► I think that it is possible that you [TS]

00:36:35 ◼   ► could go on several dates with somebody [TS]

00:36:38 ◼   ► can come up and it would never come up [TS]

00:36:41 ◼   ► and then you're like you know what I [TS]

00:36:43 ◼   ► love you [TS]

00:36:44 ◼   ► if this is I'm talk about old times sure [TS]

00:36:46 ◼   ► you would say I love you to somebody [TS]

00:36:47 ◼   ► that you've never taking their clothes [TS]

00:36:49 ◼   ► off and they would say i love you too [TS]

00:36:52 ◼   ► and you would say let's get married and [TS]

00:36:53 ◼   ► they would say great you'd say I think [TS]

00:36:56 ◼   ► we should save ourselves for marriage [TS]

00:36:57 ◼   ► and they would say I agree and then you [TS]

00:36:59 ◼   ► would get married and then you would be [TS]

00:37:01 ◼   ► in your wedding bed and you would try to [TS]

00:37:02 ◼   ► take off their blouse or there or that [TS]

00:37:06 ◼   ► their knickers their hosen their hoes in [TS]

00:37:08 ◼   ► you would grab the hose and try and pull [TS]

00:37:11 ◼   ► them off and the other person would say [TS]

00:37:12 ◼   ► ah i do not take off the hose and we [TS]

00:37:15 ◼   ► need to have the talk and then you're [TS]

00:37:17 ◼   ► like whoa i just got I just like God [TS]

00:37:21 ◼   ► invested in the thing i didn't even know [TS]

00:37:22 ◼   ► what they thought about I never knew no [TS]

00:37:24 ◼   ► poke never needed that's right never [TS]

00:37:26 ◼   ► knew the polk huh [TS]

00:37:27 ◼   ► and so I don't know at that point I [TS]

00:37:29 ◼   ► don't know enough about never needs to [TS]

00:37:31 ◼   ► know like wow they do other things [TS]

00:37:35 ◼   ► poop like for example good and want [TS]

00:37:38 ◼   ► something classic examples like if you [TS]

00:37:40 ◼   ► find yourself very attracted to somebody [TS]

00:37:42 ◼   ► who had a very different diet than you [TS]

00:37:44 ◼   ► for example if you are ravenous [TS]

00:37:46 ◼   ► carnivore and you fall in love with a [TS]

00:37:48 ◼   ► man who's a vegan like that's going to [TS]

00:37:50 ◼   ► come up with in the first probably the [TS]

00:37:53 ◼   ► first date the first time you spend any [TS]

00:37:54 ◼   ► time together you're going to think oh [TS]

00:37:56 ◼   ► yeah well for example like i read an [TS]

00:37:58 ◼   ► article recently about how many [TS]

00:37:59 ◼   ► relationships are quietly troubled by [TS]

00:38:01 ◼   ► how much the people hate the TV shows [TS]

00:38:03 ◼   ► the other person watches me to hold the [TS]

00:38:06 ◼   ► whole classic like do I get the remote [TS]

00:38:07 ◼   ► thing but there's a lot apparently you [TS]

00:38:09 ◼   ► know I'm saying these are the kinds of [TS]

00:38:10 ◼   ► things that in today's society will come [TS]

00:38:12 ◼   ► up in this case you're saying and never [TS]

00:38:13 ◼   ► nude walk to the altar and then and then [TS]

00:38:16 ◼   ► later on in the next day or two if [TS]

00:38:18 ◼   ► there's a big reveal which is that there [TS]

00:38:20 ◼   ► won't be a reveal right so I think if [TS]

00:38:22 ◼   ► you are somebody who if you're somebody [TS]

00:38:25 ◼   ► who's like let's leave the lights off [TS]

00:38:26 ◼   ► when you're having you know special time [TS]

00:38:30 ◼   ► convivial relations especially again [TS]

00:38:32 ◼   ► olden times right that's that was [TS]

00:38:34 ◼   ► considered okay and normal [TS]

00:38:35 ◼   ► well but there weren't lights right the [TS]

00:38:37 ◼   ► Sun went down and it was time to do a [TS]

00:38:39 ◼   ► little thing and if the moonlight was [TS]

00:38:41 ◼   ► coming in the window [TS]

00:38:42 ◼   ► it's not like you're gonna light a [TS]

00:38:43 ◼   ► candle in order to in order to make [TS]

00:38:45 ◼   ► whoopee candles expensive cameras are [TS]

00:38:47 ◼   ► expensive [TS]

00:38:49 ◼   ► based on these two separate on fire [TS]

00:38:50 ◼   ► there's a kind of knowing i learned this [TS]

00:38:52 ◼   ► week is a kind of New England bird that [TS]

00:38:54 ◼   ► went extinct almost went instinct just [TS]

00:38:56 ◼   ► because the cheapest way you could like [TS]

00:38:58 ◼   ► basically tear that again with the head [TS]

00:38:59 ◼   ► tearing each other head out this thing [TS]

00:39:01 ◼   ► you put a we can set the house on fire [TS]

00:39:02 ◼   ► no good soil or whatever it was [TS]

00:39:04 ◼   ► equivalent again you know you should [TS]

00:39:06 ◼   ► check this out before you do it on your [TS]

00:39:07 ◼   ► own don't you go kill a bird and set on [TS]

00:39:08 ◼   ► fire but apparently yeah that's the [TS]

00:39:11 ◼   ► thing and it because just specifically [TS]

00:39:12 ◼   ► because candles were so expensive [TS]

00:39:14 ◼   ► would the goose remain on its feet we [TS]

00:39:17 ◼   ► can get along the ground like like like [TS]

00:39:19 ◼   ► a goose rumba [TS]

00:39:20 ◼   ► well I don't know if it would keep [TS]

00:39:21 ◼   ► walking but like let's let's picture a [TS]

00:39:23 ◼   ► goose tell you something I get what [TS]

00:39:25 ◼   ► you're saying if you get in the right [TS]

00:39:26 ◼   ► position before you tear the head off [TS]

00:39:28 ◼   ► you might have a nice table lamp yeah [TS]

00:39:29 ◼   ► like a litem wow it's like you know [TS]

00:39:32 ◼   ► taxidermy needs meat practical lighting [TS]

00:39:34 ◼   ► you know what I feel like three up and [TS]

00:39:36 ◼   ► three issues of Sunset magazine from now [TS]

00:39:37 ◼   ► we're going to see an artisanal goose [TS]

00:39:39 ◼   ► land [TS]

00:39:41 ◼   ► this episode of Roderick on the line is [TS]

00:39:44 ◼   ► brought to you in part by braintree code [TS]

00:39:47 ◼   ► for easy online payments you're looking [TS]

00:39:50 ◼   ► to set up payments for your business [TS]

00:39:51 ◼   ► braintree gives your app or website a [TS]

00:39:53 ◼   ► payment solution that accepts just about [TS]

00:39:55 ◼   ► every payment method with one very [TS]

00:39:57 ◼   ► simple integration is dropping some code [TS]

00:39:59 ◼   ► and you're good to go [TS]

00:40:00 ◼   ► Plus braintree will give you the first [TS]

00:40:02 ◼   ► fifty thousand dollars in transactions [TS]

00:40:04 ◼   ► fee-free you can learn more about this [TS]

00:40:06 ◼   ► right now we're going to braintree [TS]

00:40:07 ◼   ► payments calm / supertrain now here's [TS]

00:40:11 ◼   ► the thing maybe you're working on the [TS]

00:40:12 ◼   ► next super your maybe your part of the [TS]

00:40:14 ◼   ► app class and you want to make the next [TS]

00:40:16 ◼   ► debris the next Airbnb get hub will then [TS]

00:40:18 ◼   ► heck why not use the same simple payment [TS]

00:40:21 ◼   ► solution that help them to become what [TS]

00:40:24 ◼   ► they are today there's literally no [TS]

00:40:25 ◼   ► reason not to braintree makes mobile [TS]

00:40:28 ◼   ► payments so fast and easy and seamless [TS]

00:40:30 ◼   ► it is almost magical I think for legal [TS]

00:40:33 ◼   ► reasons they're not allowed to say [TS]

00:40:34 ◼   ► that's actually magical but but I can't [TS]

00:40:35 ◼   ► say I'm not a lawyer you had this thing [TS]

00:40:37 ◼   ► your appt with literally just a few [TS]

00:40:38 ◼   ► lines of code literally like that's the [TS]

00:40:40 ◼   ► fourth time I've said that and now [TS]

00:40:41 ◼   ► you're instantly ready to accept Apple [TS]

00:40:44 ◼   ► pay android pay paypal then mo credit [TS]

00:40:47 ◼   ► cards perhaps you've heard of them [TS]

00:40:48 ◼   ► mm even Bitcoin space dollars and if [TS]

00:40:52 ◼   ► some other way comes along you can bet [TS]

00:40:55 ◼   ► braintree will be there to support that [TS]

00:40:56 ◼   ► to bring treats fast payouts and [TS]

00:40:59 ◼   ► continuous support mean you'll always be [TS]

00:41:02 ◼   ► ready whether you're earning your first [TS]

00:41:03 ◼   ► dollar or you're billion-dollar you're [TS]

00:41:06 ◼   ► going to see fewer abandoned carts and [TS]

00:41:07 ◼   ► more sales with brain trees [TS]

00:41:08 ◼   ► best-in-class mobile checkout experience [TS]

00:41:10 ◼   ► to check this out for yourself which you [TS]

00:41:13 ◼   ► really should do and to get that first [TS]

00:41:14 ◼   ► fifty thousand dollars in transaction [TS]

00:41:16 ◼   ► fee free please is it [TS]

00:41:18 ◼   ► braintree payments dot-com / supertrain [TS]

00:41:21 ◼   ► braintree payments calm / supertrain our [TS]

00:41:23 ◼   ► thanks to braintree for taking the pain [TS]

00:41:26 ◼   ► out of online payments and for [TS]

00:41:28 ◼   ► supporting Roderick lost it may not be [TS]

00:41:31 ◼   ► made out of a real group just carve the [TS]

00:41:34 ◼   ► goose out of wax yes [TS]

00:41:36 ◼   ► ya know anyway so we where we know where [TS]

00:41:39 ◼   ► the sheryl crow concert in on the danube [TS]

00:41:42 ◼   ► well i'm wondering when you were first [TS]

00:41:45 ◼   ► beginning to know others typically in [TS]

00:41:50 ◼   ► there altogether in the biblical sense [TS]

00:41:52 ◼   ► were you and what were you in a dark [TS]

00:41:54 ◼   ► room [TS]

00:41:55 ◼   ► the this is awkward [TS]

00:41:59 ◼   ► dr. heard how dark was well okay i mean [TS]

00:42:02 ◼   ► i could think specifically of you know [TS]

00:42:05 ◼   ► what to say i'm gonna say in the [TS]

00:42:07 ◼   ► important first touches it was almost [TS]

00:42:10 ◼   ► always in a in a dark place not least [TS]

00:42:13 ◼   ► because there was not a place for you [TS]

00:42:16 ◼   ► know 14 year old kids 15 year old kids [TS]

00:42:18 ◼   ► to go to do these things so you have to [TS]

00:42:19 ◼   ► drink et al in the movie years [TS]

00:42:23 ◼   ► yeah so one of the first times I was [TS]

00:42:25 ◼   ► ever visited upon was during ET this [TS]

00:42:27 ◼   ► isn't a thing where you cut a hole in [TS]

00:42:28 ◼   ► the bottom of popcorn that's a whole [TS]

00:42:31 ◼   ► next level kind of thing up [TS]

00:42:33 ◼   ► I you know that that died gotta tell you [TS]

00:42:35 ◼   ► that feels like I I don't want the real [TS]

00:42:36 ◼   ► this that feels gonna admit to me that I [TS]

00:42:38 ◼   ► don't understand logistical e how you [TS]

00:42:40 ◼   ► pull that off with any butterly pull [TS]

00:42:43 ◼   ► well I mean setting aside the hot butter [TS]

00:42:47 ◼   ► like how do you get a hole in a possible [TS]

00:42:50 ◼   ► so don't set aside the hot butter the [TS]

00:42:51 ◼   ► hot butter is a key i like I mean just [TS]

00:42:53 ◼   ► the very the very mechanics of like [TS]

00:42:55 ◼   ► imagine doing literally anything in the [TS]

00:42:57 ◼   ► world with your dick out in a movie and [TS]

00:43:00 ◼   ► somebody not noticing it but also also [TS]

00:43:02 ◼   ► by the way I have to get a popcorn [TS]

00:43:03 ◼   ► container and put a hole in it that [TS]

00:43:05 ◼   ► seems that seems you know that seems to [TS]

00:43:07 ◼   ► me like the lady doth protest too much [TS]

00:43:09 ◼   ► that feels like one of those maybe that [TS]

00:43:10 ◼   ► just got just like fucking popcorn I [TS]

00:43:12 ◼   ► think anyone that woman to watch there's [TS]

00:43:14 ◼   ► probably a German name for that I almost [TS]

00:43:16 ◼   ► certainly there is i don't know the [TS]

00:43:18 ◼   ► germinating popcorn and pop cuckold i [TS]

00:43:21 ◼   ► think that there was there is a kind of [TS]

00:43:23 ◼   ► adolescent horniness [TS]

00:43:25 ◼   ► yes that you know we all have a very [TS]

00:43:28 ◼   ► different version of adolescent [TS]

00:43:30 ◼   ► horniness from extremely adolescent [TS]

00:43:32 ◼   ► horny too [TS]

00:43:33 ◼   ► not at all yeah let's be honest but [TS]

00:43:36 ◼   ► there's this sort of Philip wrong and i [TS]

00:43:38 ◼   ► have a neil simon play style of nineteen [TS]

00:43:42 ◼   ► forties adolescents Coney Island [TS]

00:43:46 ◼   ► horniness [TS]

00:43:47 ◼   ► oh yeah sure you know where you're just [TS]

00:43:49 ◼   ► trying to get there is no sec there's no [TS]

00:43:52 ◼   ► possibility of like sexual gratification [TS]

00:43:54 ◼   ► except by doing these like weird i mean [TS]

00:43:59 ◼   ► i think putting your yeah and for those [TS]

00:44:01 ◼   ► of us who were those of you listening [TS]

00:44:03 ◼   ► who aren't going forward talking about [TS]

00:44:05 ◼   ► isn't it has seen Porky's or something [TS]

00:44:07 ◼   ► like that where that [TS]

00:44:08 ◼   ► no where you cut a hole in the bottom of [TS]

00:44:09 ◼   ► your popcorn container and I can see it [TS]

00:44:11 ◼   ► happening you get into the theater [TS]

00:44:13 ◼   ► you're sitting next to your date got [TS]

00:44:15 ◼   ► pocketknife and suddenly ball he pulled [TS]

00:44:18 ◼   ► a knife in the movie but you've got the [TS]

00:44:20 ◼   ► popcorn sitting on your lap she's [TS]

00:44:22 ◼   ► watching the movie [TS]

00:44:23 ◼   ► this is your entire thing makes [TS]

00:44:24 ◼   ► absolutely no sense the idea is you [TS]

00:44:26 ◼   ► here's here's the thing here's the [TS]

00:44:27 ◼   ► problem statement you go to a movie with [TS]

00:44:29 ◼   ► the young lady and you wanted to touch [TS]

00:44:30 ◼   ► your dick so what you have to do well [TS]

00:44:32 ◼   ► obviously you have to trick her into [TS]

00:44:34 ◼   ► touching your dick so the notion is you [TS]

00:44:36 ◼   ► get like a gentleman you bring in a [TS]

00:44:39 ◼   ► boxes can be a bag it's going to be a [TS]

00:44:41 ◼   ► box of popcorn right also you know a tub [TS]

00:44:43 ◼   ► it's a tub [TS]

00:44:44 ◼   ► okay you're crashing top of topic or you [TS]

00:44:47 ◼   ► bought a tub of you on top of the movies [TS]

00:44:49 ◼   ► lately they are big enough it was done [TS]

00:44:52 ◼   ► ok ok let's get so let's just get [TS]

00:44:54 ◼   ► through this so because it's important [TS]

00:44:56 ◼   ► to understand what we're talking about [TS]

00:44:57 ◼   ► so the idea was number one you want a [TS]

00:44:59 ◼   ► lady to touch your dick and number two [TS]

00:45:01 ◼   ► he have to trick her into it you know [TS]

00:45:04 ◼   ► she's going to be thrilled to [TS]

00:45:05 ◼   ► accidentally touch your dick for a [TS]

00:45:06 ◼   ► little bit of a second [TS]

00:45:08 ◼   ► so what you do is you get your popcorn [TS]

00:45:09 ◼   ► container in this and we're not saying [TS]

00:45:11 ◼   ► this is a good or bad thing this is just [TS]

00:45:12 ◼   ► historical reporting yeah I child say [TS]

00:45:15 ◼   ► the same thing about like cutting the [TS]

00:45:17 ◼   ► chicken's head off in the basement [TS]

00:45:18 ◼   ► absolutely try this at home where [TS]

00:45:20 ◼   ► journalists and so the notion is you cut [TS]

00:45:22 ◼   ► a dick sized hole and remember you're [TS]

00:45:24 ◼   ► probably well your teen interesting [TS]

00:45:26 ◼   ► might be erect but I think it's [TS]

00:45:27 ◼   ► important to remember that you're [TS]

00:45:28 ◼   ► nervous while you're doing this you [TS]

00:45:30 ◼   ► might not be a wreck you might have a [TS]

00:45:31 ◼   ► little acorn of a man sitting there I [TS]

00:45:33 ◼   ► just people i think it really i think it [TS]

00:45:34 ◼   ► is predicated on the fact that you have [TS]

00:45:37 ◼   ► a enough teenage horny and I so many [TS]

00:45:39 ◼   ► problems with this that you are erect [TS]

00:45:40 ◼   ► all the time ok alright fine but take it [TS]

00:45:42 ◼   ► as read [TS]

00:45:43 ◼   ► alright let me continue your honor [TS]

00:45:45 ◼   ► because go let's talk about this let me [TS]

00:45:47 ◼   ► be the prosecuting attorney for looks in [TS]

00:45:49 ◼   ► popcorn let's just presume that even the [TS]

00:45:51 ◼   ► thought of doing your honor we was [TS]

00:45:53 ◼   ► excitedly we will stipulate that the [TS]

00:45:55 ◼   ► young man had an extremely erect penis [TS]

00:45:57 ◼   ► and we'll even assume for the sake of [TS]

00:45:58 ◼   ► argument it's just extremely erect small [TS]

00:46:03 ◼   ► in length and narrow in circumference [TS]

00:46:06 ◼   ► penis [TS]

00:46:06 ◼   ► I don't know how you can say that [TS]

00:46:08 ◼   ► because I want to make this easy on your [TS]

00:46:09 ◼   ► honor this game I could walk away from [TS]

00:46:11 ◼   ► this case i don't even III could do this [TS]

00:46:13 ◼   ► with one dick hot tied behind my back [TS]

00:46:14 ◼   ► I'm telling you your honor point of [TS]

00:46:16 ◼   ► order yes you there there are a lot of [TS]

00:46:18 ◼   ► different sizes of male members there's [TS]

00:46:21 ◼   ► a lot don't differ [TS]

00:46:21 ◼   ► Joe Katie as well as we're reporting [TS]

00:46:23 ◼   ► this how we can how we can speculate [TS]

00:46:25 ◼   ► i'll make this time I'll make this case [TS]

00:46:27 ◼   ► with any dick so you got your get your [TS]

00:46:29 ◼   ► tablet take it [TS]

00:46:30 ◼   ► let's say let's say you get a nice [TS]

00:46:31 ◼   ► relatively rigid but cuttable tub of [TS]

00:46:36 ◼   ► popcorn so what a dick shaped hole in it [TS]

00:46:39 ◼   ► could be any straight pool but this will [TS]

00:46:41 ◼   ► help but it's at least big enough to [TS]

00:46:43 ◼   ► accommodate a dick [TS]

00:46:44 ◼   ► that's right so you somehow manage let's [TS]

00:46:47 ◼   ► say let's say you should fly and you're [TS]

00:46:49 ◼   ► wearing haynes so you're somehow able to [TS]

00:46:51 ◼   ► get this giant dick of yours out of your [TS]

00:46:53 ◼   ► pants without anybody noticing is better [TS]

00:46:56 ◼   ► than erect penis is helping you along [TS]

00:46:58 ◼   ► the way [TS]

00:46:58 ◼   ► all right side if you only have to reach [TS]

00:47:00 ◼   ► in there and like find it so now trying [TS]

00:47:02 ◼   ► to get out you got a hard-on you got [TS]

00:47:04 ◼   ► some popcorn [TS]

00:47:05 ◼   ► you got a pen nice you've got a dickhole [TS]

00:47:07 ◼   ► and now you somehow are able to [TS]

00:47:09 ◼   ► manipulate your erect een penis into the [TS]

00:47:11 ◼   ► food [TS]

00:47:12 ◼   ► listen you are making this sound [TS]

00:47:13 ◼   ► difficult i could do this right now you [TS]

00:47:16 ◼   ► are you thought you could do it right [TS]

00:47:17 ◼   ► now I could pull a penknife off out if I [TS]

00:47:20 ◼   ► had a tub of popcorn [TS]

00:47:22 ◼   ► I could I could very subtly look we're [TS]

00:47:24 ◼   ► watching a movie right there is not your [TS]

00:47:26 ◼   ► honor point of personal preference i [TS]

00:47:28 ◼   ► know that John wears fancy internet [TS]

00:47:30 ◼   ► underwear that has silver threads in it [TS]

00:47:32 ◼   ► that do not accommodate a dickhole intro [TS]

00:47:34 ◼   ► it's true if you have to print way down [TS]

00:47:36 ◼   ► you're wearing Levi's five ones which [TS]

00:47:38 ◼   ► have buttons your honor [TS]

00:47:39 ◼   ► alright alright alright I mean it's not [TS]

00:47:41 ◼   ► but it's not like it's everyone your [TS]

00:47:43 ◼   ► honor i'm not saying this is never got [TS]

00:47:45 ◼   ► some part of the the thrill is the [TS]

00:47:47 ◼   ► effort [TS]

00:47:47 ◼   ► okay fair enough i stipulate the point [TS]

00:47:50 ◼   ► so anyway now you've managed to get your [TS]

00:47:52 ◼   ► dick into the popcorn dickhole right and [TS]

00:47:56 ◼   ► then you just wait you wait like a [TS]

00:47:58 ◼   ► panther behind a log and precisely the [TS]

00:48:00 ◼   ► same theory as a cigarette load okay you [TS]

00:48:03 ◼   ► know what is it going to show me what [TS]

00:48:05 ◼   ► you got to go getting you gotta do when [TS]

00:48:07 ◼   ► they're not there and then just be [TS]

00:48:08 ◼   ► patient [TS]

00:48:09 ◼   ► it might not be that cigarette might be [TS]

00:48:10 ◼   ► 10 cigarettes from now that's right you [TS]

00:48:11 ◼   ► stick the cigarette load deep into the [TS]

00:48:14 ◼   ► cigarette purple hopefully you have a [TS]

00:48:16 ◼   ► paperclip or you emptied that the [TS]

00:48:18 ◼   ► tobacco out halfway down and you stick [TS]

00:48:20 ◼   ► this cigarette loading then you fill the [TS]

00:48:22 ◼   ► tobacco back up and then you put the [TS]

00:48:23 ◼   ► cigarette back in the victims back and [TS]

00:48:27 ◼   ► then you wait then you ate and sometimes [TS]

00:48:29 ◼   ► you wait in the waiting room is afoot [TS]

00:48:31 ◼   ► it was a foot and you have you have just [TS]

00:48:34 ◼   ► added [TS]

00:48:35 ◼   ► the extra wrinkle of not being able to [TS]

00:48:38 ◼   ► borrow a cigarette from this person and [TS]

00:48:40 ◼   ► also know you don't know which one it is [TS]

00:48:42 ◼   ► that's right so you can't say like can i [TS]

00:48:44 ◼   ► bum a smoke you've just eliminated one [TS]

00:48:46 ◼   ► of the people at the table from your [TS]

00:48:48 ◼   ► smoke borrowing racket and you're [TS]

00:48:51 ◼   ► waiting I'm just waiting for this person [TS]

00:48:53 ◼   ► to pull that cigarette out not notice [TS]

00:48:55 ◼   ► that it's been monkeyed with light it [TS]

00:48:57 ◼   ► and then smoked half of it before the [TS]

00:48:59 ◼   ► cigarette explodes hilariously so it's [TS]

00:49:02 ◼   ► the same like once the dick is in the [TS]

00:49:04 ◼   ► popcorn yeah you're waiting [TS]

00:49:07 ◼   ► the thrill is in the weight it's in [TS]

00:49:09 ◼   ► their weight but I i'm also going to get [TS]

00:49:11 ◼   ► there you're not eating popcorn anymore [TS]

00:49:14 ◼   ► well you're not gonna eat your own [TS]

00:49:15 ◼   ► corner yeah so now you get this this [TS]

00:49:17 ◼   ► poor woman who's there with you and [TS]

00:49:19 ◼   ► pretending to be interested in you to [TS]

00:49:20 ◼   ► begin with [TS]

00:49:21 ◼   ► she then says well maybe as a diversion [TS]

00:49:23 ◼   ► while we're enjoying the trailer for [TS]

00:49:24 ◼   ► this program I I'll have a little bit [TS]

00:49:26 ◼   ► popcorn and so she grabs and so how do [TS]

00:49:29 ◼   ► how do most teenage girls eat popcorn [TS]

00:49:31 ◼   ► little bit on you grab one or two maybe [TS]

00:49:33 ◼   ► you put 434 in your hand like a little [TS]

00:49:35 ◼   ► bowl so basically you've got half a cup [TS]

00:49:38 ◼   ► of popcorn out of this entire bucket [TS]

00:49:42 ◼   ► mm how long is it gonna take cuz you [TS]

00:49:45 ◼   ► have you ever like youryour what's your [TS]

00:49:46 ◼   ► fifteen-year-old girl on a date [TS]

00:49:48 ◼   ► are you gonna fucking dive your hand [TS]

00:49:50 ◼   ► into the shared bucket of popcorn i [TS]

00:49:53 ◼   ► agree that you're not and find a [TS]

00:49:54 ◼   ► glancing dick i agree that you're not i [TS]

00:49:56 ◼   ► think i think there are a lot of [TS]

00:49:57 ◼   ► problems with this case here it's gonna [TS]

00:49:59 ◼   ► take a long time but by the waiting is [TS]

00:50:01 ◼   ► the hardest part if you know what I mean [TS]

00:50:02 ◼   ► that's right and here is the thing [TS]

00:50:03 ◼   ► here's the thing that you're not taking [TS]

00:50:05 ◼   ► into consideration which is that and as [TS]

00:50:08 ◼   ► soon as she understands what's happening [TS]

00:50:10 ◼   ► she's going to run out of the theater [TS]

00:50:12 ◼   ► it's going to be a terrible experience [TS]

00:50:13 ◼   ► right but what you are doing as a [TS]

00:50:16 ◼   ► teenage boy is creating something that [TS]

00:50:20 ◼   ► you will revisit sort of like Ted Bundy [TS]

00:50:22 ◼   ► I get it you may email ad into a vest [TS]

00:50:26 ◼   ► this is where the Coney Island horniness [TS]

00:50:27 ◼   ► comes in new guys because you're looking [TS]

00:50:29 ◼   ► for something like to use this word i [TS]

00:50:31 ◼   ► think it's an ugly old word but you want [TS]

00:50:33 ◼   ► something that is perverse your it's the [TS]

00:50:36 ◼   ► same not dissimilar from guys who like [TS]

00:50:39 ◼   ► to expose themselves there are guys you [TS]

00:50:41 ◼   ► on the subway and a guy with his dick [TS]

00:50:43 ◼   ► out on the train like why would you do [TS]

00:50:44 ◼   ► that [TS]

00:50:45 ◼   ► like why do you have to masturbate right [TS]

00:50:46 ◼   ► now well he's actually he's he's back [TS]

00:50:48 ◼   ► and up some imagery is part of it right [TS]

00:50:50 ◼   ► he likes the shock of somebody seeing [TS]

00:50:52 ◼   ► his Johnson on the train because you're [TS]

00:50:55 ◼   ► ready to relay this album by the way [TS]

00:50:56 ◼   ► Johnson on the train but in this case [TS]

00:50:58 ◼   ► it's like someone came ride out on the [TS]

00:51:03 ◼   ► trail no good and the shock in the eyes [TS]

00:51:06 ◼   ► the shocking the eyes was so surprised [TS]

00:51:09 ◼   ► I've I told you I told you write about [TS]

00:51:11 ◼   ► about the guy that I was sitting at my [TS]

00:51:13 ◼   ► newsstand [TS]

00:51:14 ◼   ► you better not you better not be [TS]

00:51:15 ◼   ► changing the subject away from the dick [TS]

00:51:17 ◼   ► corn no I'm not alright i was so staying [TS]

00:51:19 ◼   ► at the newsstand in my old job at the [TS]

00:51:21 ◼   ► knees [TS]

00:51:21 ◼   ► i sat on a slightly raised platform [TS]

00:51:23 ◼   ► behind the cash register and read [TS]

00:51:25 ◼   ► magazines about like a quilt thing and [TS]

00:51:29 ◼   ► model training and foreign affairs and I [TS]

00:51:33 ◼   ► was sitting up there the cash she was [TS]

00:51:35 ◼   ► not a busy day people were there was [TS]

00:51:36 ◼   ► somebody over here reading vice make her [TS]

00:51:38 ◼   ► nose pre-prepared they were reading and [TS]

00:51:40 ◼   ► might bite might might buy all that [TS]

00:51:43 ◼   ► might buy in computer magazine [TS]

00:51:45 ◼   ► what was the prio 2600 the hacker Megan [TS]

00:51:48 ◼   ► what was the what was the premix weenies [TS]

00:51:51 ◼   ► one night I was that might but the [TS]

00:51:54 ◼   ► daybreakers one that was really good [TS]

00:51:55 ◼   ► night on that long ago that was a great [TS]

00:51:57 ◼   ► why don't you want riffic the one where [TS]

00:51:58 ◼   ► they said that what was it not corey [TS]

00:52:01 ◼   ► feldman but they started the rumor that [TS]

00:52:03 ◼   ► somebody died [TS]

00:52:04 ◼   ► somebody died sunday night it wasn't [TS]

00:52:06 ◼   ► corey feldman it was like oh it's Donna [TS]

00:52:08 ◼   ► Donna Donna Gabbana boot Luce Danny [TS]

00:52:10 ◼   ► Bonaduce ug Danny Bonaduce view and at [TS]

00:52:14 ◼   ► each issue was so lovingly designed like [TS]

00:52:18 ◼   ► the layout was gorgeous [TS]

00:52:20 ◼   ► I should have had a subscription but I [TS]

00:52:21 ◼   ► didn't because I worked in a magazine I [TS]

00:52:23 ◼   ► learned my lesson I learned my lesson [TS]

00:52:24 ◼   ► three different times with Harper's yeah [TS]

00:52:26 ◼   ► with the Atlantic my problem is I soon [TS]

00:52:28 ◼   ► as I get the subscription [TS]

00:52:29 ◼   ► by the time the next issue arrives I'm [TS]

00:52:31 ◼   ► not interested whereas if I have to go [TS]

00:52:33 ◼   ► to the newsstand and buy enjoy it a lot [TS]

00:52:35 ◼   ► more [TS]

00:52:36 ◼   ► yeah I think you're right i think you I [TS]

00:52:37 ◼   ► agree and that was part of the business [TS]

00:52:39 ◼   ► model of having a new state so you're on [TS]

00:52:41 ◼   ► the stand so I'm sitting there [TS]

00:52:42 ◼   ► understand i'm reading a magazine [TS]

00:52:43 ◼   ► yeah the guy walks in walks up to the [TS]

00:52:46 ◼   ► stand he says can I ask you a question [TS]

00:52:48 ◼   ► and I said yeah course that's what I'm [TS]

00:52:50 ◼   ► here for [TS]

00:52:51 ◼   ► I was pretty sarcastic working at the [TS]

00:52:52 ◼   ► newsstand sure kind of famously a guy [TS]

00:52:54 ◼   ► came in one time kind of in a hurry and [TS]

00:52:56 ◼   ► he was like you got the local paper here [TS]

00:52:58 ◼   ► and I looked up from the magazine i was [TS]

00:53:00 ◼   ► reading at the time and I said [TS]

00:53:02 ◼   ► very slowly what kind of a newsstand [TS]

00:53:05 ◼   ► would we be if we didn't have the local [TS]

00:53:08 ◼   ► paper and he said was his response he [TS]

00:53:12 ◼   ► said thanks for making me feel like an [TS]

00:53:14 ◼   ► asshole turn around stormed out and [TS]

00:53:19 ◼   ► about three years later i was involved [TS]

00:53:21 ◼   ► in a group of people who and I can talk [TS]

00:53:24 ◼   ► about this now but we would we would [TS]

00:53:27 ◼   ► dress all in black and climb up in the [TS]

00:53:30 ◼   ► middle of the night and deface [TS]

00:53:31 ◼   ► billboards [TS]

00:53:33 ◼   ► oh you're a culture jammer yeah what [TS]

00:53:35 ◼   ► culture jamming that's right we have [TS]

00:53:36 ◼   ► this whole thing where we would look at [TS]

00:53:38 ◼   ► billboard's a man we would print out a [TS]

00:53:41 ◼   ► new words in the same font and we would [TS]

00:53:45 ◼   ► get up and wheat paste so that the so [TS]

00:53:48 ◼   ► that the the like the heartbeat of [TS]

00:53:51 ◼   ► America Chevy the heartbeat of America [TS]

00:53:54 ◼   ► truck ad would say you know I have a [TS]

00:53:57 ◼   ► small penis [TS]

00:53:59 ◼   ► nice you know some real culture jam and [TS]

00:54:01 ◼   ► sure nobody's gonna see that coming [TS]

00:54:03 ◼   ► right so i was in a group of these [TS]

00:54:04 ◼   ► people and one of my fellow culture [TS]

00:54:06 ◼   ► jammers was talking to me and you know [TS]

00:54:09 ◼   ► we do we tried to use only code names [TS]

00:54:11 ◼   ► ah nice case we were busted but he was [TS]

00:54:14 ◼   ► like where do I know you from and i said [TS]

00:54:17 ◼   ► i work at the newsstand and he said oh [TS]

00:54:18 ◼   ► one time I went in there and and that [TS]

00:54:22 ◼   ► guy that works in the middle of the day [TS]

00:54:24 ◼   ► was like what kind of a newsstand we be [TS]

00:54:26 ◼   ► if we did a little paper and I was like [TS]

00:54:28 ◼   ► fuck you man and stormed out i never go [TS]

00:54:30 ◼   ► in that place anymore and I was like oh [TS]

00:54:32 ◼   ► shit that was me but I didn't say [TS]

00:54:33 ◼   ► anything [TS]

00:54:34 ◼   ► whoo boy that I know that guy he's a [TS]

00:54:36 ◼   ► real i was like you're gonna have to [TS]

00:54:37 ◼   ► give up a lot of yourself for the cause [TS]

00:54:39 ◼   ► and things like that [TS]

00:54:40 ◼   ► well that's the thing you know it's I [TS]

00:54:43 ◼   ► didn't want to say like yeah now you [TS]

00:54:45 ◼   ► know who i am i'm the midday guy we were [TS]

00:54:48 ◼   ► all wearing Paula Clavers or whatever [TS]

00:54:50 ◼   ► but anyway so this guy this and he says [TS]

00:54:55 ◼   ► do you have a do you have any magazines [TS]

00:54:59 ◼   ► about diapers and I kind of looked up [TS]

00:55:07 ◼   ► from my the magazine's readers like what [TS]

00:55:09 ◼   ► do you mean because we had a lot of [TS]

00:55:10 ◼   ► magazines about stuff right like well [TS]

00:55:14 ◼   ► I'm really [TS]

00:55:15 ◼   ► magazine store you go to let the craft [TS]

00:55:17 ◼   ► section and you're gonna find just like [TS]

00:55:18 ◼   ► a magazine about baskets yeah we have [TS]

00:55:20 ◼   ► four different magazines about being a [TS]

00:55:22 ◼   ► ham radio operator we had so many [TS]

00:55:24 ◼   ► magazines about baskets and figurines [TS]

00:55:27 ◼   ► and just every kind of thing and I'm [TS]

00:55:31 ◼   ► like huh [TS]

00:55:32 ◼   ► there's a magazine about diapers let me [TS]

00:55:33 ◼   ► think about that what would that be so [TS]

00:55:35 ◼   ► I'm like what is that everything is it a [TS]

00:55:37 ◼   ► parenting thing is that an environmental [TS]

00:55:39 ◼   ► thing I'm like tell me more and he's [TS]

00:55:40 ◼   ► like oh you know like like diapers like [TS]

00:55:43 ◼   ► a poopypants somewhere and I said [TS]

00:55:47 ◼   ► say what now and he said and he gets [TS]

00:55:50 ◼   ► this like he gets literally a [TS]

00:55:52 ◼   ► shit-eating grin on his face and he goes [TS]

00:55:54 ◼   ► poopy pants like poopy poopy diaper [TS]

00:55:58 ◼   ► diaper baby diaper baby and I was like [TS]

00:56:01 ◼   ► get the fuck out of my store and he's [TS]

00:56:04 ◼   ► just so proud of himself now I all he [TS]

00:56:08 ◼   ► said yeah he's quick to you he did and [TS]

00:56:11 ◼   ► he's about you know 30 years old and [TS]

00:56:14 ◼   ► he's and then as he as he backs up [TS]

00:56:16 ◼   ► he's not like turning and running he's [TS]

00:56:18 ◼   ► backing up from my thing and I'm [TS]

00:56:19 ◼   ► standing now like get out of here you [TS]

00:56:22 ◼   ► pervert and he's wearing diapers song [TS]

00:56:24 ◼   ► his pants you can see that his pants are [TS]

00:56:27 ◼   ► bulging from his diapers and he's like [TS]

00:56:29 ◼   ► poopy pants poop in style baby diaper [TS]

00:56:31 ◼   ► baby not like and I come around you know [TS]

00:56:34 ◼   ► now i'm down off my thing and I'm like [TS]

00:56:36 ◼   ► get out of here and you know and i'm [TS]

00:56:39 ◼   ► laughing right and he's laughing but he [TS]

00:56:41 ◼   ► is laughing because this is the most fun [TS]

00:56:44 ◼   ► he's had all day [TS]

00:56:45 ◼   ► he's a bad boy he is a very bad boy and [TS]

00:56:48 ◼   ► he's about to go get a spanking from [TS]

00:56:50 ◼   ► himself but this episode of Roderick on [TS]

00:56:54 ◼   ► the line is brought to you in part by [TS]

00:56:56 ◼   ► Casper to learn more about Casper right [TS]

00:56:58 ◼   ► now please visit Casper calm / [TS]

00:57:00 ◼   ► supertrain Casper is an online retailer [TS]

00:57:03 ◼   ► of premium mattresses that you can get [TS]

00:57:06 ◼   ► delivered to your door for a fraction of [TS]

00:57:08 ◼   ► the price that you'll find in stores [TS]

00:57:10 ◼   ► it's a new kind of hybrid mattress it [TS]

00:57:12 ◼   ► combines premium latex foam with memory [TS]

00:57:14 ◼   ► foam these two technologies come [TS]

00:57:16 ◼   ► together for a terrific night sleep it [TS]

00:57:18 ◼   ► is just the right sink and just the [TS]

00:57:20 ◼   ► right bounce it's an obsessively [TS]

00:57:23 ◼   ► engineered mattress at a shockingly fair [TS]

00:57:26 ◼   ► price now let's let's speak the truth [TS]

00:57:28 ◼   ► here people [TS]

00:57:29 ◼   ► retail mattresses can often cost well [TS]

00:57:31 ◼   ► over fifteen hundred dollars but casper [TS]

00:57:33 ◼   ► mattresses so affordable prices start at [TS]

00:57:35 ◼   ► five hundred dollars for a twin go all [TS]

00:57:37 ◼   ► the way up to [TS]

00:57:38 ◼   ► 954 King going compare that to what you [TS]

00:57:40 ◼   ► can find in retail stores if you can [TS]

00:57:42 ◼   ► stand being in the store [TS]

00:57:44 ◼   ► let's be honest all casper mattresses [TS]

00:57:46 ◼   ► are made in America now honestly for me [TS]

00:57:50 ◼   ► to understand how Casper's different you [TS]

00:57:52 ◼   ► have to start by looking at how the [TS]

00:57:53 ◼   ► mattress racket has worked historically [TS]

00:57:55 ◼   ► i don't have time to go into this in [TS]

00:57:56 ◼   ► huge detail but i can tell you tell you [TS]

00:57:58 ◼   ► that on the handful of times that i have [TS]

00:58:00 ◼   ► gone into a mattress store i walked out [TS]

00:58:03 ◼   ► with a rictus of fear loathing the [TS]

00:58:05 ◼   ► experience that I had mattress industry [TS]

00:58:07 ◼   ► isn't for inherently force customers [TS]

00:58:09 ◼   ► independent or really high prices but [TS]

00:58:12 ◼   ► Casper is literally revolutionising the [TS]

00:58:14 ◼   ► mattress industry by cutting the cost of [TS]

00:58:16 ◼   ► dealing with those retailers and show [TS]

00:58:18 ◼   ► rose and they pass those savings [TS]

00:58:19 ◼   ► directly to you [TS]

00:58:21 ◼   ► the sleep desirous consumer now gasp [TS]

00:58:24 ◼   ► understand that buying a mattress online [TS]

00:58:25 ◼   ► this is a new thing oh we're living in [TS]

00:58:27 ◼   ► the future is the jetsons i can get a [TS]

00:58:28 ◼   ► bed on the internet might make you think [TS]

00:58:31 ◼   ► it's a little weird is it even possible [TS]

00:58:33 ◼   ► well let me tell your friends by a [TS]

00:58:35 ◼   ► casper mattresses completely risk-free [TS]

00:58:36 ◼   ► they offer free delivery and returns [TS]

00:58:40 ◼   ► within a 100 day period that means you [TS]

00:58:42 ◼   ► can try out your Casper mattress for 100 [TS]

00:58:44 ◼   ► nights if you don't like it I'll come [TS]

00:58:46 ◼   ► pick it up lying on a bed for four [TS]

00:58:48 ◼   ► minutes and showroom has no correlation [TS]

00:58:50 ◼   ► to whether it's the right bed for you [TS]

00:58:52 ◼   ► that's Casper's razor can go look it up [TS]

00:58:56 ◼   ► I understand the importance of really [TS]

00:58:58 ◼   ► trying out the mattress that here's the [TS]

00:59:00 ◼   ► thing this mattress is shifting in a box [TS]

00:59:02 ◼   ► you can carry out the steps by yourself [TS]

00:59:03 ◼   ► you open it and your mattress just comes [TS]

00:59:05 ◼   ► to life everything you need right there [TS]

00:59:07 ◼   ► for a great night of sleep now listeners [TS]

00:59:09 ◼   ► of this show can get fifty dollar store [TS]

00:59:11 ◼   ► any mattress purchase by visiting Casper [TS]

00:59:13 ◼   ► calm / supertrain and using that very [TS]

00:59:15 ◼   ► special offer code supertrain fifty [TS]

00:59:18 ◼   ► dollars off that also shows your support [TS]

00:59:20 ◼   ► for the show and let's be honest it also [TS]

00:59:22 ◼   ► will support your back for wonderful [TS]

00:59:23 ◼   ► sleep [TS]

00:59:24 ◼   ► that's a that's a freebie they can run [TS]

00:59:25 ◼   ► with that I'm just an idea guy got a [TS]

00:59:28 ◼   ► Casper dot-com / super trainer thanks to [TS]

00:59:30 ◼   ► Casper for all the great night sleep and [TS]

00:59:34 ◼   ► for supporting Roderick online she's [TS]

00:59:36 ◼   ► gonna think about this diaper baby [TS]

00:59:37 ◼   ► poopypants conversation for a month and [TS]

00:59:40 ◼   ► a half [TS]

00:59:40 ◼   ► he's gonna get himself something to cry [TS]

00:59:41 ◼   ► about [TS]

00:59:42 ◼   ► he might still be thinking about you [TS]

00:59:44 ◼   ► know and he just loved the idea that [TS]

00:59:46 ◼   ► like he was transgressing yes and this [TS]

00:59:51 ◼   ► is this is the whole dirtiness thing you [TS]

00:59:53 ◼   ► can look at the coney island harness as [TS]

00:59:55 ◼   ► you said which is that you [TS]

00:59:57 ◼   ► the fact that is like a dirty bad wrong [TS]

00:59:59 ◼   ► thing [TS]

00:59:59 ◼   ► thing [TS]

01:00:00 ◼   ► part of the sexy so I think you I mean [TS]

01:00:02 ◼   ► at length I though I think you scored [TS]

01:00:04 ◼   ► some points here for the side of penis [TS]

01:00:06 ◼   ► in the popcorn [TS]

01:00:07 ◼   ► well thank you can come out and look [TS]

01:00:10 ◼   ► really great has your dog bite you bet [TS]

01:00:13 ◼   ► your ass she does everything mean who [TS]

01:00:16 ◼   ► yeah except it would be in coney island [TS]

01:00:18 ◼   ► would be like purple but particularly [TS]

01:00:21 ◼   ► I'm you know using the pop problem take [TS]

01:00:24 ◼   ► it up there ok alright so you're so I I [TS]

01:00:27 ◼   ► knew you so the you sound like you feel [TS]

01:00:29 ◼   ► like the air in my logic is i'm assuming [TS]

01:00:30 ◼   ► that this boy was a legitimate handjob [TS]

01:00:33 ◼   ► yeah he's not trying to get off right [TS]

01:00:35 ◼   ► then he's trying to get off later it's [TS]

01:00:37 ◼   ► gonna be at best a glancing blow [TS]

01:00:39 ◼   ► yeah and she was also you ever get [TS]

01:00:40 ◼   ► popcorn stuck in your teeth you don't [TS]

01:00:42 ◼   ► think about the underside of his [TS]

01:00:43 ◼   ► Colonels feels like you want that on [TS]

01:00:44 ◼   ► your glands but you weren't for that [TS]