Roderick on the Line

Ep. 182: "House Trotter"


00:00:00   I John hi Merlin how's it going good how [TS]

00:00:09   are you this is this is weird this is [TS]

00:00:16   where telling what we're doing so so as [TS]

00:00:19   some of you as the regular listeners to [TS]

00:00:21   this podcast know i'm driving across the [TS]

00:00:24   West in my gmcr be and that the the trip [TS]

00:00:28   has taken me to the san francisco [TS]

00:00:29   california where one Merlin man lives [TS]

00:00:32   and works and we are doing our [TS]

00:00:35   first-ever podcast we're in the same [TS]

00:00:37   room looking at each other [TS]

00:00:38   it wasn't a hickey live event for like a [TS]

00:00:40   fake company thing oh yeah we do that [TS]

00:00:42   we've done live singing but even then [TS]

00:00:43   we're not looking at each other we're [TS]

00:00:44   both looking at the audience come riding [TS]

00:00:46   the faders over here and you're in my [TS]

00:00:47   nuts lately yeah meeting Marlins special [TS]

00:00:49   not blend which you you you gave me the [TS]

00:00:52   whole recipe for I won't reveal it to [TS]

00:00:54   the audience [TS]

00:00:55   yeah yeah yeahs fancy pancy not yeah put [TS]

00:00:57   these together on my own with a variety [TS]

00:00:58   of different walgreens premium that [TS]

00:01:01   suggested you know we don't usually eat [TS]

00:01:02   on the program better goddamn train [TS]

00:01:04   since we're here in beautiful San [TS]

00:01:06   Francisco why not too sure that sounds [TS]

00:01:08   nuts already invented free love [TS]

00:01:10   everything is ok here in trucks right so [TS]

00:01:14   we're having a great time we moved out [TS]

00:01:16   like nuts [TS]

00:01:17   we're here together i'm in your office [TS]

00:01:19   for the first time in all the years I've [TS]

00:01:20   never been in this i don't have an [TS]

00:01:22   office job [TS]

00:01:23   oh yes I do yes I do but it is [TS]

00:01:25   undisclosed location Yeah Yeah right [TS]

00:01:28   I mean no one remembers your repurpose [TS]

00:01:30   not to some marine layer over here by [TS]

00:01:33   the Chrysler Building yeah well I just [TS]

00:01:36   heard a strange sound rumbling it's like [TS]

00:01:39   I somehow managed to get an office right [TS]

00:01:40   next to wear a fucking Street car going [TS]

00:01:42   by drawing now you're in the room 400 x [TS]

00:01:46   0 nee so yeah they like rate i'm here in [TS]

00:01:50   the room I see all of the lb x-men [TS]

00:01:54   paraphernalia that i thought was just [TS]

00:01:56   part of a bit but it's gotten really [TS]

00:01:58   keep describing from see there's [TS]

00:02:00   microphones there's there's a box is all [TS]

00:02:03   hello it's a it's a character called arm [TS]

00:02:08   I like a pupil list girl and here's her [TS]

00:02:12   friends robot our message right and [TS]

00:02:16   pupils girl and robot arms are in an [TS]

00:02:18   adventure [TS]

00:02:19   that's called these legs are impossibly [TS]

00:02:21   long yeah and they're running and they [TS]

00:02:23   look like kind of like gold plated [TS]

00:02:26   skeleton you get you can tell they've [TS]

00:02:27   been through some stuff but there but [TS]

00:02:29   they have like wedge clogs [TS]

00:02:32   yeah they have like wedgie clogged [TS]

00:02:34   choose what you got there is a giant [TS]

00:02:35   Phoenix nigga Dark Phoenix Phoenix and [TS]

00:02:38   dark phoenix yeah and they're good 14 [TS]

00:02:41   inches tall [TS]

00:02:41   yeah they're huge and like [TS]

00:02:43   disproportionate like we're even worse [TS]

00:02:46   than Barbies these these are [TS]

00:02:47   physiologically they could not stand on [TS]

00:02:50   their own they're very powerful women [TS]

00:02:51   but they have that I think that the [TS]

00:02:54   thing that sticks out to me is that if [TS]

00:02:56   you were going to be super heroing I [TS]

00:02:58   don't think you need high heels for them [TS]

00:03:00   that's right wrong kind of boots right [TS]

00:03:01   please no not you could not climb a [TS]

00:03:03   fence not gonna fight some crime or [TS]

00:03:05   whatever so what so Phoenix is a crime [TS]

00:03:08   fighter [TS]

00:03:09   uh-huh is she a detective or something [TS]

00:03:12   or she's a detective detective she does [TS]

00:03:15   she does she like have the power of of [TS]

00:03:19   smell should be Miller probably the most [TS]

00:03:22   powerful super hero in the universe not [TS]

00:03:24   that it matters penises penises Dark [TS]

00:03:26   Phoenix yeah [TS]

00:03:26   Oh what like Phoenix are like this is [TS]

00:03:29   nice [TS]

00:03:30   by greenfield she's a great Phoenix had [TS]

00:03:32   some issues over time she she said [TS]

00:03:34   sometimes for me to just be Marvel girl [TS]

00:03:36   but then something happened and she got [TS]

00:03:39   stuck in a cocoon under a lake for a [TS]

00:03:40   whole bunch of years and Roses Phoenix [TS]

00:03:42   only it wasn't really her it was [TS]

00:03:44   actually his avatar this thing called [TS]

00:03:46   the Phoenix force and that you can make [TS]

00:03:48   16 extension dark penis penis and she [TS]

00:03:50   basically a two-planet did she ever find [TS]

00:03:53   a Balrog trip going up high smiling out [TS]

00:04:00   with see and be inside the jam cr-v you [TS]

00:04:03   did you have your whole family there but [TS]

00:04:05   you-you-you like really adopted it you [TS]

00:04:09   you like you went for right away you're [TS]

00:04:11   like I could live in this I want to live [TS]

00:04:13   in this right now [TS]

00:04:14   why what is wrong with my life that I [TS]

00:04:16   don't have one of these I'm not living [TS]

00:04:17   in I wonder if it's not exclusively but [TS]

00:04:19   i wonder if it's partly just like the [TS]

00:04:21   dream of us of a boy from the nineteen [TS]

00:04:22   seventies it's got its it's such a [TS]

00:04:24   seventies dream to have [TS]

00:04:26   the house you really enjoy that Dark [TS]

00:04:27   Phoenix aren't you well maybe ambulating [TS]

00:04:29   her the other thing I'm finding about [TS]

00:04:30   this dark phoenix is that she would be [TS]

00:04:32   really impossible to play with like if [TS]

00:04:34   you want to put her in a seated position [TS]

00:04:35   like she's collectible you want to sit [TS]

00:04:38   in a chair her legs immediately spread [TS]

00:04:40   into jus like more gentle with her [TS]

00:04:42   joints you know what I mean like the [TS]

00:04:44   only reason a person would ever sit like [TS]

00:04:45   this is that they were having a [TS]

00:04:46   gynecological exam [TS]

00:04:48   this is not a natural way for a person [TS]

00:04:50   or doll to see how do you know that's [TS]

00:04:51   not a special offer from like a comic [TS]

00:04:53   con with a special gynecology edition of [TS]

00:04:55   phoenix oh no you rose from the ashes of [TS]

00:04:57   who to have a speculum and maybe she's a [TS]

00:04:59   pap smear [TS]

00:05:00   uh-huh super pap smear and what is that [TS]

00:05:03   what's the deal with her hair she [TS]

00:05:04   doesn't need all this hair she does [TS]

00:05:05   she's the most powerful super hero in [TS]

00:05:07   the universe you don't mean any hair [TS]

00:05:08   loss means you can have as much hair as [TS]

00:05:10   you want you know it's like I movable 47 [TS]

00:05:12   movable object so this is the soup that [TS]

00:05:14   so this is the big question if you had [TS]

00:05:16   all the power in the universe would you [TS]

00:05:17   have a all the hair in the world or [TS]

00:05:19   would you have be no hair was a part of [TS]

00:05:23   me that thinks that for a long time I [TS]

00:05:24   would just use all the power universe to [TS]

00:05:26   make people not care about what my hair [TS]

00:05:27   looks like me but I think eventually I [TS]

00:05:29   would get incredibly fucking elaborate [TS]

00:05:30   hair because I could so let's say this [TS]

00:05:32   girl dark phoenix yeah comes up against [TS]

00:05:36   naked blue giant man from the other [TS]

00:05:39   comic book the naked penis man attacked [TS]

00:05:42   dr. manhattan from the comic book with [TS]

00:05:44   the guy with the like bag over his face [TS]

00:05:47   with a scarecrow [TS]

00:05:48   um so who's more powerful I'll dark [TS]

00:05:52   phoenix or a penis man [TS]

00:05:54   uh-huh you know I'm gonna have to legal [TS]

00:05:58   a single find their wiki is there we [TS]

00:06:00   can't let me check my there I say yeah [TS]

00:06:04   in the universe [TS]

00:06:09   I feel like dark phoenix can't even [TS]

00:06:10   fucking sit down so I'm gonna give this [TS]

00:06:12   one to be this me maybe he doesn't need [TS]

00:06:15   to sit down John I don't know even the [TS]

00:06:17   most powerful creature in the universe [TS]

00:06:18   if she--if of the most powerful creature [TS]

00:06:20   still has articulated joints yeah and [TS]

00:06:22   isn't just a like a like a model of that [TS]

00:06:24   personal sitting or oh my god it's [TS]

00:06:28   brutal and on [TS]

00:06:30   yeah this is I i feel like these things [TS]

00:06:32   are these would only be collected by did [TS]

00:06:35   you want to open your mail or anything [TS]

00:06:36   while you're hairy people drink [TS]

00:06:38   different email with I didn't know [TS]

00:06:40   here's the great story [TS]

00:06:42   here's a great story so I get an email [TS]

00:06:43   from the woman who has the office next [TS]

00:06:46   to mine in my office building right and [TS]

00:06:49   she said hey um I don't know if you [TS]

00:06:53   haven't been around in a couple of days [TS]

00:06:54   but there is a giant stack of boxes [TS]

00:06:57   leaning against your office door what [TS]

00:07:00   and I was like how many boxes and she [TS]

00:07:02   was like more than a dozen boxes and [TS]

00:07:07   they are basically starting to block the [TS]

00:07:09   hallway and I said oh right [TS]

00:07:13   not very long ago I gave out the the [TS]

00:07:16   physical address of my office and told [TS]

00:07:18   people to send me the things that they [TS]

00:07:19   make and then I left town in an RV with [TS]

00:07:23   no clear return date food and so I [TS]

00:07:25   called the building manager and I said [TS]

00:07:27   hey um which check to see if there are a [TS]

00:07:31   bunch of boxes outside my office door [TS]

00:07:33   and he went up and he was like here I [TS]

00:07:36   said you have a key to my office would [TS]

00:07:37   you put those things in my office and he [TS]

00:07:39   said yes and then it happened again and [TS]

00:07:43   he put those in my office so when i get [TS]

00:07:45   back to the office [TS]

00:07:48   there's gonna be a lot of mail to open [TS]

00:07:49   and you're gonna get a talking-to i [TS]

00:07:50   think from the from the building manager [TS]

00:07:53   well you know it's not your mom John [TS]

00:07:55   thing is it's an art space and I'm the [TS]

00:07:57   one guy that doesn't routinely spray [TS]

00:07:59   freon into the halls ok alright you know [TS]

00:08:01   like your losses and minuses [TS]

00:08:03   yeah right and walk down the hall and [TS]

00:08:04   it's like Oh somebody has pushed out [TS]

00:08:07   into the hall like several mannequins [TS]

00:08:09   that have been made into a very awful [TS]

00:08:12   art and they're just gonna sit there for [TS]

00:08:15   seven months huh [TS]

00:08:17   he has made another woman of Port jobs [TS]

00:08:19   right so i have a bunch of boxes in the [TS]

00:08:22   hall and and its credit to my space that [TS]

00:08:25   nobody are presumably nobody stole any [TS]

00:08:27   right i mean maybe somebody walked by [TS]

00:08:29   was like I'm gonna take one of those he [TS]

00:08:30   has 12 boxes i'm going to take one but i [TS]

00:08:33   don't think so i don't think they did [TS]

00:08:34   you regret giving out the address [TS]

00:08:36   well I haven't haven't really opened any [TS]

00:08:38   of these boxes so i have no idea if I [TS]

00:08:40   open these boxes and I have 12 new [TS]

00:08:42   poorly made wallets what I'm gonna be [TS]

00:08:45   like that was a weird experiment but if [TS]

00:08:47   i open the box and there's like salt and [TS]

00:08:49   pepper shakers carved out [TS]

00:08:51   of precious Rock right and there's like [TS]

00:08:54   somebody made me a bunch of custom [TS]

00:08:56   underwear that says like look who's [TS]

00:08:59   talking to or whatever it is that people [TS]

00:09:03   are making seven-sided lighthouse made a [TS]

00:09:05   dream if somebody made one of those are [TS]

00:09:07   annual out of real dreams popsicle [TS]

00:09:09   popsicle stick [TS]

00:09:11   Lincoln Logs may be careful Tower made [TS]

00:09:13   out too quick yep [TS]

00:09:14   yeah i'm gonna be psyched because i'll [TS]

00:09:16   just be like my office now looks cool it [TS]

00:09:18   doesn't just have a bunch of like vote [TS]

00:09:20   Roderick paraphernalia that's sad [TS]

00:09:22   it's wet and sad now and i would like a [TS]

00:09:25   seven sideline house made of Dreams [TS]

00:09:26   people can come over here and feel like [TS]

00:09:28   this is great and if you know if there [TS]

00:09:30   are a couple of wallets i'll stop [TS]

00:09:32   admitting office 332 washington avenue [TS]

00:09:35   in any town USA 12345 send all the cards [TS]

00:09:39   and letters cards and letters nothing [TS]

00:09:42   dead cards and letters right we have [TS]

00:09:47   crazy lunch i'm still on some I'm way [TS]

00:09:49   off my game today for a number of [TS]

00:09:50   reasons I've had a lot of coffee but [TS]

00:09:51   also we had incredibly weird lunch do [TS]

00:09:53   you want on butter's should i ahh you [TS]

00:09:55   should talk about it so knowing that [TS]

00:09:57   you're not as much of a fan of secret [TS]

00:09:58   salt as i am right well years and years [TS]

00:10:00   ago when i first started coming to this [TS]

00:10:03   beautiful part of san francisco back [TS]

00:10:05   when I would stay at your house [TS]

00:10:09   sometimes for many many many nights [TS]

00:10:11   before you don't never never more than [TS]

00:10:13   two or three weeks [TS]

00:10:15   yeah right but I thought that would be [TS]

00:10:16   unusual for a lot of people to have a [TS]

00:10:18   houseguest show up and Lee and stay for [TS]

00:10:20   two weeks [TS]

00:10:21   sort of like AE but we had fun right [TS]

00:10:24   times man and you know you you get you [TS]

00:10:26   get a man like John Ryder canales you [TS]

00:10:28   can throw you can throw mountain now [TS]

00:10:29   we're going to fill them out [TS]

00:10:31   good luck but you get a forklift so I [TS]

00:10:34   even all the way back then we there was [TS]

00:10:37   a little dim sum place then you've [TS]

00:10:38   referred to in many many many of your [TS]

00:10:40   other programs and it's a dirty little [TS]

00:10:43   tiny little dim sum place where the man [TS]

00:10:46   counts the money and then to handle the [TS]

00:10:48   dick he never has more than five dollars [TS]

00:10:50   in money in the cash drawer if you have [TS]

00:10:53   to make if he has to make change for [TS]

00:10:54   anything he literally reaches under a [TS]

00:10:56   filthy counter grabs filthy money and [TS]

00:10:58   then this filthy hands that filthy thing [TS]

00:10:59   the thing that distinguishes this place [TS]

00:11:01   is so well-known [TS]

00:11:02   neighborhood I because they had a cat [TS]

00:11:06   Oh intelligence all in the kitchen and [TS]

00:11:09   they didn't mind it so it's clear down [TS]

00:11:12   just to be clear here it's not that they [TS]

00:11:14   welcomed the cats in the pigeons into [TS]

00:11:16   the kitchen and it's not that they were [TS]

00:11:17   mad about it [TS]

00:11:18   they merely didn't mind somewhere in [TS]

00:11:20   between yeah it was it was yeah it was [TS]

00:11:22   just it was just a situation that they [TS]

00:11:24   just don't sort of irrelevant to them i [TS]

00:11:26   remember going in there in ordering dim [TS]

00:11:28   sum at one point he reached into his [TS]

00:11:30   pocket and put it put it in the in the [TS]

00:11:34   container for us but we had the many [TS]

00:11:36   great dim sums and let this is something [TS]

00:11:38   maybe I've never revealed yeah but that [TS]

00:11:41   place was the first dim sum I overhand [TS]

00:11:43   you can see became i became a ritual you [TS]

00:11:46   would come to town no matter what would [TS]

00:11:47   always go there and get probably 15 [TS]

00:11:49   pounds of himself right a dollar amount [TS]

00:11:51   of them something that seemed impossible [TS]

00:11:52   for us to actually manage to eat through [TS]

00:11:54   and yet we did it every time [TS]

00:11:56   yeah even if you did the math you said 5 [TS]

00:11:58   10 15 25 40 per person we still managed [TS]

00:12:01   to do it and and they emit rarely cost [TS]

00:12:04   more than like ten dollars no matter how [TS]

00:12:05   much we got right because the thirty [TS]

00:12:06   cents apiece yeah and so like it's the [TS]

00:12:09   place that with the place that I first [TS]

00:12:11   had dim sum I mean I know the place that [TS]

00:12:13   I promotion antis the place that I first [TS]

00:12:15   had thai food [TS]

00:12:16   I mean I know these places i remember [TS]

00:12:17   the occasion and remember that and you [TS]

00:12:19   introduced me to dim sum and we went [TS]

00:12:21   there today to have our beautiful John [TS]

00:12:23   and Merlin dim sum lunch and what [TS]

00:12:25   happened [TS]

00:12:26   it's got it got it somebody is in there [TS]

00:12:28   i was there as recently as I want to say [TS]

00:12:30   a week and a half ago I went in there [TS]

00:12:32   grabbed six books on my out the door [TS]

00:12:34   good to go how's your daughter she's in [TS]

00:12:36   school have a nice day go [TS]

00:12:37   Bob's your uncle bob's your uncle yeah [TS]

00:12:39   yeah and and we went in it was it was [TS]

00:12:41   they were getting it getting it they had [TS]

00:12:43   all the lights on it wasn't dark and [TS]

00:12:44   weird like it used to be over there for [TS]

00:12:46   the first of about four occasions this [TS]

00:12:49   particular afternoon I said something to [TS]

00:12:50   someone they stared at me like I was [TS]

00:12:51   from another planet you said is this [TS]

00:12:53   place gone for good or you just [TS]

00:12:55   remodeling and the guy turned he was on [TS]

00:12:56   a ladder he literally staring at me [TS]

00:12:58   turned and looked at you and said no he [TS]

00:12:59   didn't even make a handshake and speak [TS]

00:13:00   English [TS]

00:13:01   he just he looked at me as the like I [TS]

00:13:03   had an umbrella forehead yeah right and [TS]

00:13:05   then you finally found somebody who had [TS]

00:13:07   would answer you [TS]

00:13:08   yeah and he said yeah it's going to be a [TS]

00:13:09   coffee shop shop because you know if if [TS]

00:13:11   you have a chance for one thing that we [TS]

00:13:12   need more around here right it's a [TS]

00:13:14   coffee shop coffee shop with you some [TS]

00:13:15   more bubble tea [TS]

00:13:16   some more Irish bars and a problem or [TS]

00:13:19   coffee on another walgreens if they put [TS]

00:13:22   another walgreens on this block but then [TS]

00:13:24   so we went we went up the street we were [TS]

00:13:26   looking for a good lunch and we went [TS]

00:13:28   into a place that kind of smells like [TS]

00:13:29   propane [TS]

00:13:31   yeah and they didn't seem like not so [TS]

00:13:33   much and then we went into a place that [TS]

00:13:34   was a really big [TS]

00:13:38   by comparison to the other restaurant [TS]

00:13:39   mean it was it's it's palatial animal 33 [TS]

00:13:43   tables out of 30 in this place occupied [TS]

00:13:45   also almost completely empty [TS]

00:13:47   we sat down the first thing that [TS]

00:13:48   happened was a table of six white people [TS]

00:13:51   stood up and left without having ordered [TS]

00:13:53   and as they walked by each person made [TS]

00:13:55   sustained and uncomfortable eye contact [TS]

00:13:58   with us yeah with a weird like Manson [TS]

00:14:01   Family smile [TS]

00:14:02   yeah it had a real text Watson kind of [TS]

00:14:04   feeling today were all different ages [TS]

00:14:06   there was like a hippie mom yep there [TS]

00:14:08   was a young guy there was an old man i [TS]

00:14:11   think the last guy was kind of a father [TS]

00:14:12   figure in the family and he he had a [TS]

00:14:15   real real enduring look at us [TS]

00:14:18   yeah yeah like the sort of bhagwan look [TS]

00:14:20   and so we were like what do we do [TS]

00:14:23   Merlin looked at the menu shows some [TS]

00:14:25   items show some other items that there [TS]

00:14:28   were some you know there was a there was [TS]

00:14:30   a bullfrog on the dish on the menu idea [TS]

00:14:33   just trying to find the menu real quick [TS]

00:14:35   is out there are some of them there's [TS]

00:14:36   one was a it was venting chicken didn't [TS]

00:14:38   wanna write which would be good for [TS]

00:14:40   something there was there was garlic [TS]

00:14:42   strings grow extremes there was the one [TS]

00:14:44   that started with was like acid reflux [TS]

00:14:47   other than acid drops pork buns they got [TS]

00:14:50   the drops was the name of that acid [TS]

00:14:51   drops yeah anyway so so we ended up [TS]

00:14:55   ordering as it as the droplets beans [TS]

00:14:57   pork has the droplets beans pork acid [TS]

00:15:01   droplets drop beans pork havin ass [TS]

00:15:04   addresses that was beans pork [TS]

00:15:06   yeah great guided by voices two three [TS]

00:15:08   four and down so we ordered this food [TS]

00:15:11   the waiter kind of made some suggestions [TS]

00:15:13   we ordered it came it was delicious but [TS]

00:15:17   it was so flavored with msg & cumin and [TS]

00:15:21   inexplicably cumin which is not normally [TS]

00:15:23   attorney asked tons of cumin [TS]

00:15:26   the distinguishing characteristic is [TS]

00:15:27   everybody we encountered was staring at [TS]

00:15:30   us but also everyone in this restaurant [TS]

00:15:32   the diners and the wait staff alike not [TS]

00:15:35   only in this case the wait staff seemed [TS]

00:15:37   not only as though they had not been [TS]

00:15:39   waiters for more than an hour so it [TS]

00:15:41   seems like maybe they just never been to [TS]

00:15:43   a restaurant they didn't know how to [TS]

00:15:44   restaurant [TS]

00:15:45   well I the right the waiters didn't they [TS]

00:15:47   also walked by and sustained eye contact [TS]

00:15:50   with us with no not attempting to fill [TS]

00:15:52   our water glasses or asks any questions [TS]

00:15:54   just pacing the restaurant what about [TS]

00:15:56   Cheryl Tiegs act like staring [TS]

00:15:58   yeah and then I thinking back to the the [TS]

00:16:00   original customers that left as soon as [TS]

00:16:02   we walked in they seemed like people who [TS]

00:16:05   were approximating what they thought [TS]

00:16:07   being a human being was yeah if you have [TS]

00:16:11   a really above average an alien doing a [TS]

00:16:14   really above average impersonation of [TS]

00:16:15   human yeah if you put on human suit yeah [TS]

00:16:17   not for the first time but this was the [TS]

00:16:19   first time they like you you tried out [TS]

00:16:21   the human suit a few times you'd wanted [TS]

00:16:23   on the train [TS]

00:16:24   yeah you did to put on human suit like [TS]

00:16:26   you're not ready to join a summary get [TS]

00:16:28   you could pass among the other grades [TS]

00:16:29   right right just walking around not [TS]

00:16:31   trying to interact with me because that [TS]

00:16:33   Phil not like I still human totally [TS]

00:16:35   human being he doesn't is not he's not [TS]

00:16:37   he's not so comfortable in the human [TS]

00:16:39   suit that he's going to get a job in an [TS]

00:16:40   office but this was like all right you [TS]

00:16:42   know what let's take five of us out to a [TS]

00:16:44   restaurant and see how it plays in the [TS]

00:16:47   afternoon will be a great place to test [TS]

00:16:48   that out and then you and I walk in and [TS]

00:16:50   they're like I don't think we're ready [TS]

00:16:52   to like be in a restaurant with these [TS]

00:16:53   two guys right you know they're like oh [TS]

00:16:56   my god i don't have no idea how deep [TS]

00:16:57   this goes right if they were they were [TS]

00:16:59   in there they were trying it out the [TS]

00:17:00   waiters are also praised and so they [TS]

00:17:04   were just like let's see how this played [TS]

00:17:05   the whole restaurant is just like it's a [TS]

00:17:07   front let's test this XP on the front [TS]

00:17:09   it's it's more like a like one of those [TS]

00:17:11   little towns you go to when you're going [TS]

00:17:13   act like you're attacking the Russians [TS]

00:17:14   you go somewhere or little safety town [TS]

00:17:16   where you bring your bike it's an entire [TS]

00:17:18   simulacrum town right safety town safety [TS]

00:17:20   where you come in and you interact with [TS]

00:17:22   other people so you know you all know [TS]

00:17:24   it's a drill you all know it's an [TS]

00:17:25   exercise right you can dance if you want [TS]

00:17:26   to [TS]

00:17:27   yeah so you can leave stuff behind but [TS]

00:17:28   you want to be able to fit in you want [TS]

00:17:29   to pass you don't get clocked exactly [TS]

00:17:31   and so we walk in and it's they were not [TS]

00:17:33   expecting us they knew we were headed to [TS]

00:17:35   do [TS]

00:17:35   some but somehow the whole thing like [TS]

00:17:37   they didn't coordinate the gutting of [TS]

00:17:39   the dim sum place with you and me being [TS]

00:17:41   on the street my god they should have [TS]

00:17:42   seen this coming and we walk in there [TS]

00:17:44   like holy shit this is not part of the [TS]

00:17:47   plan [TS]

00:17:48   what we're going to do is sit in here [TS]

00:17:49   and people are gonna walk by and look in [TS]

00:17:51   at us feel uncomfortable about this [TS]

00:17:53   restaurant and not come in and that was [TS]

00:17:55   going to be what we did today like [TS]

00:17:57   somebody had left off the sheet the fact [TS]

00:18:00   that if this was an actual restaurant [TS]

00:18:02   there might be people who come in and [TS]

00:18:03   want to eat their right they should more [TS]

00:18:05   than simply prepare yourselves for this [TS]

00:18:06   and the last time diners the last thing [TS]

00:18:08   they thought was it would be you and me [TS]

00:18:10   alright if it was just a couple of [TS]

00:18:11   Snorks just like some normals who came [TS]

00:18:14   in and were like oh you need some food [TS]

00:18:16   and look at our phones isn't I did not [TS]

00:18:19   there is not a single thing I said to [TS]

00:18:22   anyone in that place that they would not [TS]

00:18:24   have heard 40 times a day if they were [TS]

00:18:26   waiters but they looked like they had [TS]

00:18:28   never heard it like like like for [TS]

00:18:29   example they never actually heard what I [TS]

00:18:31   would describe as human voice well and [TS]

00:18:33   you said do you have t.i said first ever [TS]

00:18:35   said i will I said we'd like some tea [TS]

00:18:37   jasmine tea and the i think its response [TS]

00:18:39   was t Yeah right right [TS]

00:18:42   like a like a young Chinese guy had [TS]

00:18:44   never heard of tea and so so get this [TS]

00:18:47   guy over here [TS]

00:18:48   yeah so then we ordered this food and it [TS]

00:18:50   adds it had all the wrong flavors for [TS]

00:18:52   Chinese food like like they were back [TS]

00:18:54   there like like the waiter comes back [TS]

00:18:56   and he's like holy shit they want food [TS]

00:18:57   they would feel like [TS]

00:18:58   only I don't get it twisted what is a [TS]

00:19:01   good book [TS]

00:19:03   telephone telephone room and so he opens [TS]

00:19:08   the book is like cumin capers fish and [TS]

00:19:11   like a milk you threw it all in a pot [TS]

00:19:15   and then it came out and I feel now like [TS]

00:19:18   I have like I've been sucking on 2d [TS]

00:19:20   batteries all afternoon [TS]

00:19:22   there's some there's so much msg in my [TS]

00:19:24   body that my tongue is just like swollen [TS]

00:19:27   and let and and full of like I don't [TS]

00:19:31   know like corpuscles I don't even want [TS]

00:19:33   yeah I to tell you what is it you mean [TS]

00:19:35   like you got an extra retina I I started [TS]

00:19:37   really experiencing meals from my [TS]

00:19:38   childhood i started i started tasting [TS]

00:19:39   things that I had tasted in years [TS]

00:19:41   it suddenly reawakens kind of nine volt [TS]

00:19:44   energy on my tongue you're like otter [TS]

00:19:45   pops [TS]

00:19:46   the 10 human counterparts and humid with [TS]

00:19:50   Cuban food like that never heard of it [TS]

00:19:52   well so anyway I do feel like that that [TS]

00:19:55   uh that warrants some more investigation [TS]

00:19:58   i kinda wanna go back but you know from [TS]

00:20:00   experience [TS]

00:20:01   yeah you know place especially like a [TS]

00:20:03   lot of Asian restaurants but especially [TS]

00:20:04   a Chinese restaurant [TS]

00:20:05   it pays to go in and get a group of [TS]

00:20:07   people trapped bunch of different things [TS]

00:20:08   at least one thing will be good at this [TS]

00:20:11   is not a Chinese thing but like it's the [TS]

00:20:12   kind of food is usually very conducive [TS]

00:20:14   to sharing family-style order in their [TS]

00:20:16   obvious right or six things for for the [TS]

00:20:18   two of us right and ago and the guy [TS]

00:20:20   finally the guy he gets real you know [TS]

00:20:22   greater get to his credit says ah I [TS]

00:20:25   think that's enough [TS]

00:20:26   yeah we ordered three things like that's [TS]

00:20:28   that's that's plenty and he was right to [TS]

00:20:30   fish arrived in what I can only describe [TS]

00:20:31   is I want to say a terrine it was [TS]

00:20:33   actually more of a punch bowl [TS]

00:20:34   it was screaming punchbowl was the type [TS]

00:20:36   of thing that if you went into a fancy [TS]

00:20:37   house it would be sitting on the table [TS]

00:20:39   in the entryway filled with dried [TS]

00:20:42   flowers or yeah right now or or 7,000 [TS]

00:20:47   starlight mints or colored marble [TS]

00:20:49   imagine like you have a pretty good [TS]

00:20:50   sized hands and it was you're given a [TS]

00:20:52   job on a game show and was your job on [TS]

00:20:54   that game show to as quickly as possible [TS]

00:20:57   stick your hands into this into this [TS]

00:20:59   confuses food and take out everything [TS]

00:21:01   that was a large flavor fish a man with [TS]

00:21:04   large hands it would take two minutes [TS]

00:21:05   for the media that this was astonishing [TS]

00:21:07   to me it was like four fish you get a [TS]

00:21:09   big bowl of this and the first time I [TS]

00:21:10   dug into it was like oh there's some [TS]

00:21:12   kind of bean sprouts in the bottom but [TS]

00:21:13   but they're not real bean sprouts [TS]

00:21:15   there's some other kind of sprout and I [TS]

00:21:17   was like oh this is a thing where [TS]

00:21:18   there's like four pieces of fish on top [TS]

00:21:20   of a giant answer that's how they get [TS]

00:21:22   you right under layer of sprouts yeah [TS]

00:21:24   but then we kept digging into this thing [TS]

00:21:26   and there were there were like the flesh [TS]

00:21:29   of 15 fish and 15 good-sized fish were [TS]

00:21:33   in this terrain you can you can put away [TS]

00:21:35   some groceries and I i think they did [TS]

00:21:37   you finish all of it so at the end I [TS]

00:21:40   blacked out toward the antenna and I was [TS]

00:21:41   like I'm not gonna leave I leave some [TS]

00:21:44   sprouts in this bowl but I'm gonna leave [TS]

00:21:46   any fish right you take that challenge [TS]

00:21:47   and then I what I i went for it and my [TS]

00:21:50   plate was piled high with with the human [TS]

00:21:52   fish for the sixth time [TS]

00:21:54   and I just was like I I don't think [TS]

00:21:56   there's a bottom to no mas [TS]

00:21:58   I cannot guess I can't get all the fish [TS]

00:21:59   out and then that was trying to find of [TS]

00:22:01   wine down we got some stuff to do we get [TS]

00:22:02   to ride in the RV we need to get going [TS]

00:22:04   yeah and so stuff to do i if i remember [TS]

00:22:07   correctly I i think i did two things [TS]

00:22:09   that are usually fairly well understood [TS]

00:22:11   when it's the end of the meal so one of [TS]

00:22:13   the things I did was I held my hand up [TS]

00:22:15   in the air like I had a make-believe pen [TS]

00:22:17   and I i made a signature what am i doing [TS]

00:22:19   John kind of square doing oscillating [TS]

00:22:21   signing was a sign sign the check now I [TS]

00:22:24   would like to check but just to put a [TS]

00:22:26   belt on those suspenders I also turned [TS]

00:22:27   to the man and I said can we have the [TS]

00:22:28   check please that's right and what [TS]

00:22:31   response you get [TS]

00:22:32   I got a blank I you know I got me a [TS]

00:22:34   mambo dogface to the banana patch but I [TS]

00:22:36   got I got I got a dead-eyed shark look [TS]

00:22:39   like I just said things that weren't [TS]

00:22:41   even looking like he'd been talking to [TS]

00:22:42   to look a like a book about lean like a [TS]

00:22:44   whale right yeah we're like it like you [TS]

00:22:47   were Beetlejuice and all of a sudden [TS]

00:22:49   your hat turned into a merry-go-round [TS]

00:22:50   and you're like doing meanwhile oh um I [TS]

00:22:55   can't I can't explain it except that I [TS]

00:22:58   mean this neighborhood is gentrifying [TS]

00:22:59   fast yes faster than I expected and but [TS]

00:23:04   this doesnt sit this is no justification [TS]

00:23:05   i ever saw [TS]

00:23:06   I almost back to that is I you know if I [TS]

00:23:09   allow myself to adopt that thought [TS]

00:23:11   technology a whole lot of shit in this [TS]

00:23:13   neighborhood [TS]

00:23:14   something's making a lot more sense yeah [TS]

00:23:15   i just got about one of our sponsors [TS]

00:23:17   this week [TS]

00:23:18   hush whoa we're going to do like all [TS]

00:23:21   right we're sitting in the room together [TS]

00:23:22   yeah you're going to live live live read [TS]

00:23:25   of the sponsor and isn't it and you are [TS]

00:23:27   encouraged to to join into it to flush [TS]

00:23:29   it out before you do I'd like everyone [TS]

00:23:31   to hear that i'm i'm drinking one of [TS]

00:23:33   Merlin man's who famous Saltzer waters [TS]

00:23:36   in a can the Refresh e seltzer water [TS]

00:23:39   like to thank our sponsor for this [TS]

00:23:41   episode safeway seltzer water [TS]

00:23:43   hi enjoying it I haven't tasted it yet i [TS]

00:23:45   just opened and everybody in 50 mm um [TS]

00:23:51   it's good it tastes it tastes good it [TS]

00:23:54   does not taste like was filtered through [TS]

00:23:56   a dead raccoon or no taste the cumin [TS]

00:23:58   uh-huh no taste of giving it its rinsing [TS]

00:24:00   it out but it goes great with Merlin [TS]

00:24:02   special blend of nuts i got your I got [TS]

00:24:03   your chaser right here look [TS]

00:24:05   some hydrogen that one quart of hydrogen [TS]

00:24:07   peroxide another one haven't opened yet [TS]

00:24:08   it's a cure-all [TS]

00:24:09   yes for me I just keep right here just [TS]

00:24:11   me and swish swish and then into the [TS]

00:24:13   spit bucket with him up there goes haha [TS]

00:24:16   it's literally as bitbucket it's a five [TS]

00:24:20   gallon can of like spackle once you [TS]

00:24:23   start with the hydrogen peroxide you'll [TS]

00:24:24   never look back that's right you feel [TS]

00:24:26   dirty you feel dirty in the mouth if you [TS]

00:24:28   don't have a little bit of hydrogen [TS]

00:24:28   peroxide use it for every user for [TS]

00:24:30   everybody would all be about 90 for [TS]

00:24:32   everything is it is contact lens [TS]

00:24:33   solution it's not know that right mrs. [TS]

00:24:35   safety [TS]

00:24:36   ladies and gentlemen are today i would [TS]

00:24:38   say about our once part of our show [TS]

00:24:39   which is Casper tony lacasse me so now i [TS]

00:24:43   have not one but two casper mattresses [TS]

00:24:45   in my house and they are mom ok put a [TS]

00:24:49   pin in that because Casper is an online [TS]

00:24:51   retailer premium mattresses out like [TS]

00:24:52   John i know i only have one casper [TS]

00:24:54   mattresses I don't know how you got away [TS]

00:24:55   with two but they're online retailer [TS]

00:24:57   premium mattresses and you get delivered [TS]

00:24:58   to your door for a fraction of the price [TS]

00:25:00   that you pay in stores and I I'm telling [TS]

00:25:02   you you do not want have you actually [TS]

00:25:04   tried to go and buy a mattress in a [TS]

00:25:05   store i have a you know I used to go [TS]

00:25:08   routinely to department stores and just [TS]

00:25:09   lay on the mattresses because it just [TS]

00:25:11   was a thing to do in the afternoon so [TS]

00:25:12   this is just during that period where [TS]

00:25:14   you would place to lay down the thing is [TS]

00:25:15   they won't kick you off the mattress [TS]

00:25:16   because they think you might be testing [TS]

00:25:18   it you can lay there for 12 minutes [TS]

00:25:21   before someone comes along and as long [TS]

00:25:23   as you leave a spot or something I and [TS]

00:25:25   then they're like hey can I help you [TS]

00:25:27   with something you're like just testing [TS]

00:25:28   the matter what do you think you're [TS]

00:25:30   better than me but then those mattresses [TS]

00:25:31   are like 35 hundred dollar super [TS]

00:25:33   expensive and they're super gross [TS]

00:25:34   because the thing is you think you're [TS]

00:25:36   the first but you think you think you're [TS]

00:25:37   the first person to go lay on the [TS]

00:25:38   disgusting mattress in the store [TS]

00:25:40   sorry Johnny you are the latest one is [TS]

00:25:42   what that is right cancers mattress is a [TS]

00:25:44   one of a kind of mattress it's a new [TS]

00:25:46   hybrid mattress that combines premium [TS]

00:25:47   latex phone with latex say what I didn't [TS]

00:25:50   even know that it's a new kind of hybrid [TS]

00:25:52   mattress Jonna combines premium latex [TS]

00:25:54   phone from with memory foam it's a [TS]

00:25:55   hybrid it's a new kind of hybrid matters [TS]

00:25:58   that combines premium latex phone with [TS]

00:26:00   memory foam and she doesn't have a it [TS]

00:26:01   doesn't have a battery pack I didn't [TS]

00:26:03   look inside [TS]

00:26:03   no it's a new kind of hybrid mattress [TS]

00:26:05   that combines premium latex phone with [TS]

00:26:07   memory foam latex foam and memory and [TS]

00:26:09   memory foam that means it's got just the [TS]

00:26:11   right sink and just the right balance [TS]

00:26:14   it does a lot of time to get the best [TS]

00:26:15   but not the sink or the worst is the [TS]

00:26:17   same without the bound can just [TS]

00:26:18   literally begging to get me started on [TS]

00:26:20   that thing is like this is starting to [TS]

00:26:22   sound a little bit like a real doll in [TS]

00:26:24   the shape of a matter best the two [TS]

00:26:26   technologies come together for better [TS]

00:26:27   nights and brighter days i have now had [TS]

00:26:29   mine I checked it's been over every 14 [TS]

00:26:31   months now Wow 14 months so what you ask [TS]

00:26:34   you a question job so I piled onto that [TS]

00:26:37   mattress III so it it shows up shows up [TS]

00:26:40   in a box it's literally about it's a box [TS]

00:26:42   on the on the front porch [TS]

00:26:43   it's a little bigger than a two drawer [TS]

00:26:45   file cabinet yeah right the boxes I I [TS]

00:26:47   showed up I was like no there's no way [TS]

00:26:49   that there's a king-size mattress in [TS]

00:26:50   that box is one thought that everyone [TS]

00:26:52   has no way is that a bad no way [TS]

00:26:54   and what is that a bit and I and they [TS]

00:26:55   said over the mattresses on its way and [TS]

00:26:57   then two days later there is on the [TS]

00:26:58   front porch I'm like you think shame on [TS]

00:27:00   me [TS]

00:27:01   shame on me for falling for these [TS]

00:27:02   hucksters and Casper yeah and so I slept [TS]

00:27:04   the thing inside and I let it sit there [TS]

00:27:05   in the entryway for a couple of days i'm [TS]

00:27:07   not sure what to do and she do a couple [TS]

00:27:08   of days to a couple of weeks and people [TS]

00:27:10   are like what's the big box and I'm like [TS]

00:27:12   a king size mattress they're like no way [TS]

00:27:13   so i finally that John are the other [TS]

00:27:17   things in this is really interesting [TS]

00:27:18   size mattresses which is this tiny box [TS]

00:27:20   so i unpack it and the mattress goes the [TS]

00:27:23   warning [TS]

00:27:24   it's like a it's like one of those [TS]

00:27:26   mushrooms in the forest that comes up [TS]

00:27:27   out of the ground and all of a sudden [TS]

00:27:28   it's like this enormous mushroom [TS]

00:27:30   mushroom like a giant mushroom like a [TS]

00:27:32   magic mushroom time punishment I flip it [TS]

00:27:33   out and I'm like I've stayed on [TS]

00:27:35   listen I've been a touring musician for [TS]

00:27:37   15 years I've slept on a lot of [TS]

00:27:39   mattresses john robert forecaster [TS]

00:27:41   mattresses around the around the country [TS]

00:27:43   and around the world and I looked at [TS]

00:27:44   this thing and I was like all right well [TS]

00:27:46   you know when is the ones this match [TS]

00:27:49   gonna rise up and buy my by biting me on [TS]

00:27:51   the way and I get on this thing then [TS]

00:27:53   like it's not there it's not it's not [TS]

00:27:57   it's not a heavy it's not think it's not [TS]

00:27:58   there's no baloney [TS]

00:28:00   I'm just like oh I'm on this mattress [TS]

00:28:02   and then I'm just like having some [TS]

00:28:04   mattress time yes and then here's the [TS]

00:28:07   here's the here's the crazy thing [TS]

00:28:08   yeah i was putting this mattress in the [TS]

00:28:10   guest room yeah but then I started [TS]

00:28:14   sleeping in the guest room turns out and [TS]

00:28:17   since the caps casper mattresses arrived [TS]

00:28:19   in the guest room [TS]

00:28:20   I have not slept in my actual bed oh my [TS]

00:28:23   goodness and sleeping on the Casper in [TS]

00:28:24   the guest room I wake up every morning [TS]

00:28:26   like where am I [TS]

00:28:27   I I sleep in mind every day I think I [TS]

00:28:29   know why it's so comfortable because [TS]

00:28:30   it's a new kind of hybrid model combines [TS]

00:28:33   premium latex foam with memory foam [TS]

00:28:36   well I support it to the top of the box [TS]

00:28:38   shows up you open this thing in it [TS]

00:28:40   inhales any of this beautiful beautiful [TS]

00:28:43   mattress it's you know the thing is it's [TS]

00:28:45   not it's not too hard not too soft it's [TS]

00:28:47   not a kind of hybrid match i collect i [TS]

00:28:49   like i like a firm mattress [TS]

00:28:51   I don't like a I don't like a bus [TS]

00:28:52   segment is the thing i think from [TS]

00:28:54   watching cartoons and seeing thirties [TS]

00:28:55   movies we think you know a hobo time you [TS]

00:28:57   think you want a soft bed is off below [TS]

00:28:59   that the last thing in the world that [TS]

00:29:01   you don't want to talk about [TS]

00:29:01   particularly particularly when you are a [TS]

00:29:03   big man you want to you want a firm [TS]

00:29:05   mattress on a big mattress big boy bed [TS]

00:29:07   and you know i'm i'm often uh five [TS]

00:29:11   guests right right i mean you want a [TS]

00:29:13   mattress that shoot people out of bed [TS]

00:29:15   are you sure i don't like people to [TS]

00:29:17   stick around in bed i wanted to go sleep [TS]

00:29:19   in their own bed [TS]

00:29:20   it's a new kind of hybrid that combines [TS]

00:29:21   this mattress can accommodate three [TS]

00:29:24   people let's just say that right [TS]

00:29:26   what size is that it's I swear the King [TS]

00:29:28   one who [TS]

00:29:29   so here's the crazy thing yeah right i [TS]

00:29:32   think they're gonna find out what [TS]

00:29:33   happened so i'm gonna be knocking on [TS]

00:29:34   your door buddy [TS]

00:29:35   so then I got a second one through you [TS]

00:29:38   know by hook or by crook let's say let's [TS]

00:29:40   say I was not a scam [TS]

00:29:42   I wasn't trying to scam anybody i was [TS]

00:29:43   just like hey Here I am Here I am I'm [TS]

00:29:45   doing these podcasts plural [TS]

00:29:47   yeah and the podcast to match to podcast [TS]

00:29:50   to match that's the that's the old [TS]

00:29:52   exchange rate and so that the next one [TS]

00:29:55   when the Talmud next one I was like it's [TS]

00:30:00   really more of a it is a product an [TS]

00:30:02   Ashkenazi uh [TS]

00:30:03   that's the park in here the the is it [TS]

00:30:07   right for a man to have two mattresses [TS]

00:30:08   in exchange for to podcast so here's one [TS]

00:30:10   here's one here's what i did on the [TS]

00:30:11   second the second mattress I was like [TS]

00:30:13   you know what I want to California king [TS]

00:30:14   I've never been before and I'm big man i [TS]

00:30:17   want it say yeah I don't think I've ever [TS]

00:30:19   even seen one if I had a california king [TS]

00:30:21   i might not even shoot people on my bad [TS]

00:30:22   i might welcome them into my bed get [TS]

00:30:24   their little zip code [TS]

00:30:26   yeah that's right you go over to that [TS]

00:30:28   side of the mattress i'll see you in the [TS]

00:30:29   morning [TS]

00:30:29   so this California King arrives on the [TS]

00:30:33   front porch [TS]

00:30:34   it's still like an impossibly small box [TS]

00:30:37   for what it were pretends to be right up [TS]

00:30:39   or tends to be but uh but I've seen this [TS]

00:30:42   in action so I know I know it's possible [TS]

00:30:46   and I move the california king into the [TS]

00:30:49   living room but the problem is in order [TS]

00:30:52   to install this california king in my [TS]

00:30:54   house I have to actually get rid of my [TS]

00:30:56   actual bed [TS]

00:30:58   oh you got a word problem right now you [TS]

00:31:01   got you got some kind of thing where you [TS]

00:31:02   got this is not gonna be easy a single [TS]

00:31:03   answer for this to go to trial game too [TS]

00:31:05   kind of existential tile game I've got a [TS]

00:31:07   queen size sleigh bed and the sleigh bed [TS]

00:31:09   creaks when you are when you move [TS]

00:31:14   trigger vigorously yes and that can be [TS]

00:31:16   funny [TS]

00:31:17   depending on who your houseguest is your [TS]

00:31:19   Majesty but it can also be kind of a [TS]

00:31:21   pain in the ass just very much [TS]

00:31:23   distracting right here just like what is [TS]

00:31:25   come on this can't be real this is like [TS]

00:31:27   something that adds an element [TS]

00:31:28   competition it's like that's like the [TS]

00:31:29   movie delicate testing this is somebody [TS]

00:31:32   down there somebody like cutting up some [TS]

00:31:33   pork and a french movie with their the [TS]

00:31:35   garbage can that's right that's right in [TS]

00:31:37   the garbage can [TS]

00:31:38   the the one with the tape recorder that [TS]

00:31:39   says who have you been sleeping boots [TS]

00:31:41   that's good movie at the galaxy frog in [TS]

00:31:43   it i think i feel like i feel like i'm [TS]

00:31:45   mixing up consistently and you say no [TS]

00:31:47   but kinda but that's a queen-size bed [TS]

00:31:49   and here's the here's the thing in the [TS]

00:31:51   in the in the sleigh bed there is a [TS]

00:31:56   mattress that i have had since uh since [TS]

00:32:00   basically three weeks after I quit [TS]

00:32:03   drinking which was 21 hours i think the [TS]

00:32:07   international matches authority would [TS]

00:32:08   tell you you should be changing that [TS]

00:32:10   little fellow a little more you should [TS]

00:32:12   change that mattress long time ago but [TS]

00:32:13   here's what happened [TS]

00:32:14   I got sober and i was like i needed i [TS]

00:32:16   need to get an apartment i haven't had [TS]

00:32:18   an apartment for a while to get key i [TS]

00:32:19   should buy a toothbrush one of these [TS]

00:32:21   days and I need a mattress so I I went [TS]

00:32:25   out to one of those places like keep [TS]

00:32:27   mattresses on the side of the road and [TS]

00:32:28   there was a there was a shipping [TS]

00:32:30   container and you could go in the [TS]

00:32:32   shipping container and walk down the [TS]

00:32:34   dark like no lights in it and pick your [TS]

00:32:37   mattress out of there in the solitary [TS]

00:32:38   450 shoot somebody off of pit and there [TS]

00:32:42   was no so they were all stacked up like [TS]

00:32:43   mattresses stand on end [TS]

00:32:46   Wow and so I walk through and I'm [TS]

00:32:47   looking at these things and i pointed [TS]

00:32:49   out there and that what this is at a [TS]

00:32:51   time [TS]

00:32:51   kinda like remember one Gibson Les [TS]

00:32:53   Paul's were judged by how heavy they [TS]

00:32:56   were oh yeah like all the heavier the [TS]

00:32:58   les paul the more sustained and now if [TS]

00:33:01   you go to get some company they they [TS]

00:33:04   sell you the lightest Les Paul that's [TS]

00:33:07   the sign of quality the light ones [TS]

00:33:09   because they can still get the [TS]

00:33:10   performance characteristics or without [TS]

00:33:11   the way if you're playing for a long [TS]

00:33:12   time on stage that becomes be on the [TS]

00:33:14   lighter guitar apparently although I [TS]

00:33:15   feel like a heavy guitar still good [TS]

00:33:17   anyway I'm walking through this thing's [TS]

00:33:18   that's silly ad that's the that's the [TS]

00:33:20   only comparison i have so I'm like I [TS]

00:33:21   want the heaviest mattress here a smile [TS]

00:33:24   and pulling these light matches out no [TS]

00:33:25   no no and then I come to a mattress that [TS]

00:33:28   is a purple paisley and be weighs as [TS]

00:33:32   much as a honda civic now even with [TS]

00:33:34   paisley that's a mattress that for a man [TS]

00:33:36   like you at that time that's the future [TS]

00:33:38   not the past [TS]

00:33:38   all right that's exactly right i felt [TS]

00:33:40   like I'm i got a toothbrush now I've [TS]

00:33:43   been sober sober for three weeks i'm [TS]

00:33:45   getting a purple paisley mattress that i [TS]

00:33:46   had that treat myself to a mattress out [TS]

00:33:48   of shipping containers right for people [TS]

00:33:50   can't lift this mattress and I brought [TS]

00:33:52   home it was firm like you were sleeping [TS]

00:33:55   on a Honda Civic em but I've had it for [TS]

00:33:59   20 years literally every good thing [TS]

00:34:03   that's ever happened to me has happened [TS]

00:34:04   on that mattress every bad thing that's [TS]

00:34:06   ever happened to me has happened on that [TS]

00:34:07   mattress it is that mattress now is I [TS]

00:34:12   would say uh i would say it is the color [TS]

00:34:16   of Oklahoma as seen from the air and it [TS]

00:34:22   is so knackered right yeah it has [TS]

00:34:27   everyone I've ever known has left a part [TS]

00:34:31   of themselves in one or the other side [TS]

00:34:34   of this mattress literally every person [TS]

00:34:36   i've ever been [TS]

00:34:37   I've ever been close to and you know at [TS]

00:34:40   some point in their sort of right after [TS]

00:34:42   I quit drinking i got scabies um because [TS]

00:34:46   I still is and still is trafficking with [TS]

00:34:49   people that I knew the old days there [TS]

00:34:51   but this is not a cats purr question no [TS]

00:34:53   no no this is this matches i got a [TS]

00:34:55   shipping container anyway i sterilized [TS]

00:34:58   it somehow I think bye-bye like pouring [TS]

00:35:00   a hydrogen peroxide on it which was the [TS]

00:35:03   only multi-tool I hadn't yeah sure [TS]

00:35:05   and ya literature I mean I can see it's [TS]

00:35:09   like a Rorschach test of my entire life [TS]

00:35:11   oh and so I'm very reluctant to get rid [TS]

00:35:14   of it except it is past its expiration [TS]

00:35:16   date [TS]

00:35:17   the problem is it still weighs 700 [TS]

00:35:19   pounds i can't just slap it down the [TS]

00:35:21   stairs and move it outside [TS]

00:35:23   I said that's it that's the challenge so [TS]

00:35:25   the whole thing's gotta go my whole room [TS]

00:35:27   he's gotta change I've got this [TS]

00:35:28   california king waiting in its cocoon [TS]

00:35:31   down in my entryway and I'm like so [TS]

00:35:35   excited about it but I also there's a [TS]

00:35:37   there's an uphill climb before i can [TS]

00:35:39   like deploy this in life [TS]

00:35:42   the crazy part is if you get your Casper [TS]

00:35:43   mattress for some reason we could just [TS]

00:35:47   not the Paisley mattress John's over 20 [TS]

00:35:49   years [TS]

00:35:49   halfway through the read listen if [TS]

00:35:53   anybody wants to come by be the last one [TS]

00:35:55   to sleeping on a mattress this could be [TS]

00:35:57   a promotion with Casper maybe cast which [TS]

00:35:59   is what contest be the last one to leave [TS]

00:36:01   your mark on John's Paisley that's right [TS]

00:36:02   yeah that's right you can take it with [TS]

00:36:04   you when you go you should please [TS]

00:36:06   imagine what like in the crime lab what [TS]

00:36:08   they would have to deal with in terms of [TS]

00:36:09   there's no control on he even imagine [TS]

00:36:12   you could create you know basically you [TS]

00:36:13   could repopulate the planet [TS]

00:36:15   I just taking the DNA out of this [TS]

00:36:17   mattress and saying like well there's I [TS]

00:36:19   mean we have 400 completely separate DNA [TS]

00:36:22   and probably 4,000 DNA's that have [TS]

00:36:26   combined unnatural my god the island of [TS]

00:36:28   dr honor you get this casper mattresses [TS]

00:36:32   the one of the glass [TS]

00:36:33   super-clean nitrous incredibly clean [TS]

00:36:36   it's a lot nice living in a [TS]

00:36:37   hermetically-sealed background God and [TS]

00:36:40   you get in your house and you sleep on [TS]

00:36:41   it for a hundred knights and if you are [TS]

00:36:42   not satisfied for some reason you can [TS]

00:36:44   send it back because that is their [TS]

00:36:45   policy is free delivery paints returns [TS]

00:36:47   it's made in America and get sleep [TS]

00:36:49   glorious sleep all of that is incredible [TS]

00:36:51   all the amazing the prices are bananas [TS]

00:36:53   on these things he started with five [TS]

00:36:54   hundred dollars for twin size up to 954 [TS]

00:36:56   a king-size mattress that is like about [TS]

00:36:58   half of what you pay in my experience [TS]

00:37:00   dynamite dynamite [TS]

00:37:02   I don't you know the thing is now i'm [TS]

00:37:03   thinking rather than take the Paisley [TS]

00:37:06   mattress out i feel like i should give [TS]

00:37:09   it to a lab because there may be new [TS]

00:37:10   strains of penicillin they could pull [TS]

00:37:12   out of it or potentially like like [TS]

00:37:15   painkillers you solve crimes [TS]

00:37:17   sure well I don't think they're there [TS]

00:37:19   weren't any real crimes man on that [TS]

00:37:22   mattress somewhere incredible part is [TS]

00:37:24   that it is a list of this show you can [TS]

00:37:26   go to Casper calm / supertrain and use [TS]

00:37:28   the very special offer code supertrain [TS]

00:37:30   wait a minute and you get fifty dollars [TS]

00:37:34   towards the purchase of any mattress my [TS]

00:37:36   ship has been tastic terms and get [TS]

00:37:41   supplies and test so glad I brought you [TS]

00:37:44   and that's thanks to Casper for a great [TS]

00:37:47   night sleep and for supporting Roderick [TS]

00:37:49   online Thank You Casper you have you [TS]

00:37:51   have revolutionized my life and and I [TS]

00:37:54   feel like if you like when i finally get [TS]

00:37:56   rid of that that old mattress it's the [TS]

00:37:59   beats the dawn of a new age I have to be [TS]

00:38:01   honest with you I don't know it might be [TS]

00:38:03   a gas leak [TS]

00:38:04   I think something's happened to me in [TS]

00:38:05   the last 15 minutes do you are you [TS]

00:38:07   feeling anything with the msg and the [TS]

00:38:09   human my tongue has the swelling has [TS]

00:38:11   gone down I still feel like there's I [TS]

00:38:14   still feel like I have a battery in my [TS]

00:38:15   mouth but it's just a triple a battery [TS]

00:38:18   I feel like I'm falling down very very [TS]

00:38:21   very very slowly [TS]

00:38:24   you had the feeling he wasn't really [TS]

00:38:26   going down yeah exactly like oh no I'm [TS]

00:38:28   fine i think is i'm falling down but it [TS]

00:38:30   might take me a week and a half now that [TS]

00:38:32   you mention it I feel like I have an [TS]

00:38:34   extra stomach [TS]

00:38:35   yeah well you you sound both very close [TS]

00:38:38   and very far away right now [TS]

00:38:39   yeah well it might be it might be the [TS]

00:38:41   extra stomach like I've never felt like [TS]

00:38:44   I had two stomachs beforehand [TS]

00:38:45   isn't weird strange i'm gonna miss that [TS]

00:38:47   damn somebody I'll tell you what I miss [TS]

00:38:49   it already [TS]

00:38:50   so we had lunch and welcome back to [TS]

00:38:53   Sunday afternoon with John Merlin who [TS]

00:38:55   and we went to the 0 which the walgreens [TS]

00:38:57   got some guts math half went to the [TS]

00:38:58   walgreens we saw a very very interesting [TS]

00:39:01   thing at the walgreens yes which I don't [TS]

00:39:04   I don't mean to say i don't mean to say [TS]

00:39:06   that like weird line that couldn't [TS]

00:39:08   figure out whether it was a line or not [TS]

00:39:10   like well everyone that join the line [TS]

00:39:12   was like is this the line oh no no one's [TS]

00:39:15   ever know where the line is that is a [TS]

00:39:17   bunch of people standing around in there [TS]

00:39:18   are some castor just let me talk about [TS]

00:39:20   this walking in the past that it sounds [TS]

00:39:22   so if you just listen to the program's [TS]

00:39:24   you think I'm exaggerating left it with [TS]

00:39:26   this is the walgreens where we bought [TS]

00:39:27   the Cape [TS]

00:39:28   yes we're then we went and had a night [TS]

00:39:31   with John tonight with the Cape [TS]

00:39:33   yes yes yes we took photos of you but [TS]

00:39:35   but you know what you would you not [TS]

00:39:36   agree that there is there is some kind [TS]

00:39:38   of something a little bit Grimm brothers [TS]

00:39:39   about this walgreens this walgreens I've [TS]

00:39:42   been to a lot of walgreens let's be [TS]

00:39:43   honest answers first of all it's an [TS]

00:39:44   urban walgreen so it doesn't have the [TS]

00:39:46   full like it doesn't stretch out like a [TS]

00:39:48   normal water now it's very compact they [TS]

00:39:51   probably don't have what you need and if [TS]

00:39:53   they do have something that's like what [TS]

00:39:54   you need [TS]

00:39:55   they might have one of it or be out of [TS]

00:39:56   it huh and everyone knows where the line [TS]

00:39:59   is everything everytime we can like [TS]

00:40:00   write because there's some machines that [TS]

00:40:02   you can get your copies made all your [TS]

00:40:04   photos made prescription there maybe for [TS]

00:40:06   cash registers registers open or just [TS]

00:40:08   the pharmacy and then no one's gonna [TS]

00:40:11   reach out [TS]

00:40:12   yeah there's sort of a grouping of [TS]

00:40:13   people and no one's in charge and then [TS]

00:40:15   it got endcaps people are fighting to [TS]

00:40:17   get to the end caps and because it's the [TS]

00:40:19   holidays I here in San Francisco there's [TS]

00:40:22   an end cap full of sharper image branded [TS]

00:40:24   products that's right which I couldn't I [TS]

00:40:26   mean I stripper image has really fallen [TS]

00:40:28   from its early days as a as a thing that [TS]

00:40:31   was expected james bond company [TS]

00:40:33   yeah really like you were CEO and you [TS]

00:40:36   wanted something on your desk and said [TS]

00:40:37   I'm an asshole some little bit like you [TS]

00:40:40   get that is where the balls are going [TS]

00:40:42   obsidian Yeah right and I'm sitting I'm [TS]

00:40:45   an asshole look at me [TS]

00:40:46   look at me and then they moved into [TS]

00:40:48   massage chairs and air filters well [TS]

00:40:50   there was a while didn't have a [TS]

00:40:51   submarine was like Hammacher Schlemmer [TS]

00:40:53   slam slam your hammer slammer consumers [TS]

00:40:55   for they had all of those things that [TS]

00:40:57   hammer slicer and and now I think I [TS]

00:41:00   don't even know there's still a company [TS]

00:41:01   I think they might just like PR card and [TS]

00:41:03   I think just by their name to put on [TS]

00:41:05   yeah it's a brand and you can just like [TS]

00:41:06   yeah it's did you just put it on with [TS]

00:41:08   like one of those price guns seriously [TS]

00:41:10   think I love dad I want to make his day [TS]

00:41:12   special yeah I want to get him something [TS]

00:41:13   nice from the sharper image and cap & [TS]

00:41:17   Cabot the walgreens is it would say i [TS]

00:41:19   love you daddy [TS]

00:41:21   yeah so we're looking at this work I [TS]

00:41:22   mean you know absolutely looking at [TS]

00:41:24   because we're just two guys that can't [TS]

00:41:25   find it with long as we think we're in [TS]

00:41:27   line but we're not sure and and then I [TS]

00:41:30   notice that there's a flask sharper [TS]

00:41:33   image flask an email kind of lasting put [TS]

00:41:35   your back pocket down your back pocket [TS]

00:41:37   plastic might take to a football game up [TS]

00:41:38   lid on it is something that you know [TS]

00:41:40   it's not like I'm an alcoholic it's just [TS]

00:41:42   like I just want to carry somebody [TS]

00:41:43   saying you're walking on you would have [TS]

00:41:45   a little nip i went a little miss [TS]

00:41:46   designed the small paperback book you [TS]

00:41:48   can put that in your pocket enjoy a [TS]

00:41:49   little bit of just something if you may [TS]

00:41:50   be out in a duck blind or you're sitting [TS]

00:41:53   at sitting up under Pendleton blanket at [TS]

00:41:55   the at the college game which in your [TS]

00:41:56   vest pocket polo flash flash give [TS]

00:41:58   somebody give the guy next to you and [TS]

00:41:59   nip put a little bit in your coffee [TS]

00:42:01   maybe [TS]

00:42:01   sure right doesn't mean you have a [TS]

00:42:03   drinking problem just means that you [TS]

00:42:04   want a little you just want like eight [TS]

00:42:06   ounces Merry Christmas but this flask is [TS]

00:42:09   characterized by a unique it has a [TS]

00:42:11   unique quality that other flash don't [TS]

00:42:13   which is that it is a 40-ounce flat [TS]

00:42:16   40-ounce baskets about the size of a [TS]

00:42:18   professional frisbee [TS]

00:42:19   yeah that's right it's about so it's a [TS]

00:42:21   disciple 175 [TS]

00:42:23   yeah but it's shaped in every other way [TS]

00:42:25   my hip pockets like a hip flask [TS]

00:42:28   yeah and so we stared at it we picked it [TS]

00:42:31   up off the shelf and passed it back and [TS]

00:42:32   forth between yes tried to we tried to [TS]

00:42:35   imagine how how bored we try to compute [TS]

00:42:39   if you can put an entire liquor bomb [TS]

00:42:41   into this which you could well I'd also [TS]

00:42:45   as it happens there is a standard [TS]

00:42:47   alcohol unit that is 40 ounces alone a [TS]

00:42:53   lot of people think of malt liquor they [TS]

00:42:54   think of a quart of malt liquor right [TS]

00:42:56   but we're talking about a 40 do you [TS]

00:42:58   no how many ounces is 40 ounces mm it's [TS]

00:43:01   yeah it's a lot of a lot of that I can't [TS]

00:43:03   do the math that fast but and so if [TS]

00:43:06   you're holding this flask you'd base [TS]

00:43:07   basically in scale you would like an [TS]

00:43:09   alcoholic child it's more that's right [TS]

00:43:11   it's more than a leader it's like to [TS]

00:43:13   love 1.2 leaders and and just imagining [TS]

00:43:18   like you would have to you would have to [TS]

00:43:19   either have a friend help you carry it [TS]

00:43:22   yes you can put it in the back pocket of [TS]

00:43:24   your films and jacket but it wasn't [TS]

00:43:26   co-branded with filson no that's just a [TS]

00:43:28   little thing i'm doing [TS]

00:43:29   whoo-hoo and is honestly I almost bought [TS]

00:43:33   it and I still think maybe i want to buy [TS]

00:43:36   it looks so good because on the [TS]

00:43:38   passenger seat [TS]

00:43:39   yeah it goes with the RV right it just [TS]

00:43:41   go sleep and the thing is i would fill [TS]

00:43:42   with acetone or benzene yeah something [TS]

00:43:46   that you need if you want to and like [TS]

00:43:48   prime a fuel-injection system [TS]

00:43:50   30-5 search for 1.5 liters / no by all [TS]

00:43:54   means are taking it [TS]

00:43:56   it's full of acetone we have plenty of [TS]

00:43:59   time to look at it it's a fantastic [TS]

00:44:01   thing and the more I think about it the [TS]

00:44:02   more I like once you get it you get it i [TS]

00:44:04   feel like i wanted i mean I'm you know [TS]

00:44:06   what I'm just gonna buy it for christmas [TS]

00:44:07   that's sweet of you yeah you got to wrap [TS]

00:44:09   yourselves that alright yeah ok I'm [TS]

00:44:11   going to wrap it haha i don't want to [TS]

00:44:13   make it John feeling I'm feeling i think [TS]

00:44:14   i had too much human do you want some [TS]

00:44:16   special month when I live in upland you [TS]

00:44:18   know I'm surprised as sitting here [TS]

00:44:20   looking at you [TS]

00:44:20   yeah that the this is this is spills [TS]

00:44:24   like a normal podcast it feels like [TS]

00:44:25   sitting around with you talking if I [TS]

00:44:26   were hallucinating from the food i would [TS]

00:44:28   be feeling pretty good [TS]

00:44:30   somebody asked me the other day whether [TS]

00:44:31   we look at each other when we podcasting [TS]

00:44:32   I was like no yes I'm you get questions [TS]

00:44:37   that are hard to answer because they're [TS]

00:44:38   so wrong we're not even right yeah I [TS]

00:44:40   like it will ask me how long it i have [TS]

00:44:42   been asking the past how long it takes [TS]

00:44:43   to write in episodes haha that's [TS]

00:44:49   difficult to answer you know somebody [TS]

00:44:51   asked me the other day like how much [TS]

00:44:52   preparation i do before on the line I'll [TS]

00:44:55   get all got rehearsal you got scheduling [TS]

00:44:57   you got the fittings get to the fittings [TS]

00:44:59   know sometimes I put on a shirt but I i [TS]

00:45:03   remember the first time you called me on [TS]

00:45:05   skype and I or maybe I called you or [TS]

00:45:07   something like that but it was like I i [TS]

00:45:10   push the video button [TS]

00:45:12   because i didn't know what i was doing [TS]

00:45:14   my nightmare and you were you started [TS]

00:45:16   yelling no no no video no video and I've [TS]

00:45:19   never since then I've never used video [TS]

00:45:21   skype I why don't even I don't even [TS]

00:45:23   touch it the button that button just [TS]

00:45:25   feels like like like some kind of flush [TS]

00:45:27   button [TS]

00:45:28   I don't trigger people but I happen to [TS]

00:45:30   know that I share an electronic fear [TS]

00:45:33   with with other people a lot of my [TS]

00:45:34   friends have this your biggest fear is [TS]

00:45:37   your phone starts ringing it's a weird [TS]

00:45:38   ringtone oh my god it's a FaceTime [TS]

00:45:40   clearly call you pick it up [TS]

00:45:42   unknown caller requesting a video call [TS]

00:45:45   haha that happen to us triggering yes [TS]

00:45:48   somebody in trinidad and tobago Kaponi [TS]

00:45:50   alexa turn office lights off yeah also [TS]

00:45:59   just so you know anybody who has a an [TS]

00:46:02   Amazon echo in the house you turned off [TS]

00:46:03   their life [TS]

00:46:04   why do exactly that's great alexa uh [TS]

00:46:08   open garage door couldn't find a [TS]

00:46:13   divisive group named garage door moving [TS]

00:46:15   profile alexa who's John Roderick Oh [TS]

00:46:19   John Roderick is an American musician [TS]

00:46:22   writer podcaster and politician I'm a [TS]

00:46:30   podcaster and politician that's Thank [TS]

00:46:34   You election [TS]

00:46:35   thank you oof that's a good work here [TS]

00:46:39   writing I feel like when do I feel I [TS]

00:46:42   actually feel a little bit we look like [TS]

00:46:43   my like my arm like my eyelids are [TS]

00:46:45   sweating yeah i'm starting to get the [TS]

00:46:47   Rosicrucians of msg as I said that group [TS]

00:46:51   of friars that you can get the tear out [TS]

00:46:52   of magazines that they have a monastery [TS]

00:46:54   important the Rosicrucians the [TS]

00:46:56   Rosicrucians of different from rosacea [TS]

00:46:59   that's what I English boy spanglish boys [TS]

00:47:01   had their oh yeah rosacea is a show [TS]

00:47:04   that's how you tell a German from a [TS]

00:47:06   group of other white people [TS]

00:47:07   it's alright yeah i got that capillaries [TS]

00:47:09   yeah the capillary start to burst at a [TS]

00:47:12   young age the uber storm capillaries [TS]

00:47:13   scheisse [TS]

00:47:15   well it's dark in here now it is dark [TS]

00:47:17   shop alexa turn on [TS]

00:47:20   those lights ok ok it's pretty Boyce's I [TS]

00:47:27   I feel like she should be more [TS]

00:47:29   respectful of course needs to I think I [TS]

00:47:32   think she should say okay or I think she [TS]

00:47:34   should say yes sir or yes mr. Roderick [TS]

00:47:36   or yes mr. man [TS]

00:47:38   mhm like okay just feels like what the [TS]

00:47:41   food the fucker you used to get that [TS]

00:47:43   with my gps where I really felt like I [TS]

00:47:46   knew in my head to to a near certainty [TS]

00:47:48   that there's no way the voice was [TS]

00:47:50   actually getting frustrated with me but [TS]

00:47:52   still we go [TS]

00:47:54   recalculating I just don't I just felt [TS]

00:47:56   like decades of disappointment in the [TS]

00:47:58   place is like make a u-turn when [TS]

00:48:00   possible [TS]

00:48:01   recalculating make a u-turn well the [TS]

00:48:02   thing i love about the new gps is is [TS]

00:48:05   that they have started to do like given [TS]

00:48:08   normal traffic there you are on the [TS]

00:48:11   fastest route except for like at the one [TS]

00:48:16   of them said to me today except for some [TS]

00:48:17   traffic was like some how do you know [TS]

00:48:20   about some traffic you don't know you [TS]

00:48:22   don't know how much traffic is some [TS]

00:48:24   traffic you're you're like a you're an [TS]

00:48:27   algorithm another man start don't start [TS]

00:48:29   put using like it with me started using [TS]

00:48:31   mitigating words ray like maybe you'll [TS]

00:48:33   get there at that it's like Oh for your [TS]

00:48:36   drive home [TS]

00:48:36   it's going to be a little bit busy huh [TS]

00:48:39   and I thought is that I feel like it's [TS]

00:48:41   the you know what it is it's casual [TS]

00:48:43   Friday everywhere [TS]

00:48:44   yeah and they're all the people that are [TS]

00:48:45   making these robots for us they're like [TS]

00:48:47   oh what we want is a robot that's really [TS]

00:48:49   cash so it's serious as who's John [TS]

00:48:52   Roderick oh my god says who's your [TS]

00:48:56   daughter turned on what my gosh it Bob's [TS]

00:48:59   your daughter that's not the influence [TS]

00:49:01   is really horrifying [TS]

00:49:02   who's John Roderick 00087 just pull up [TS]

00:49:08   your card lets you got anything [TS]

00:49:10   yeah I want to hear her voice wikipedia [TS]

00:49:13   John Roderick I just because all it [TS]

00:49:17   isn't this photo of you look at that is [TS]

00:49:19   early and that's a home haircut huh [TS]

00:49:21   is there a nice photo or 40 just having [TS]

00:49:23   a 47 i did i just turned 40 I was back [TS]

00:49:25   in September 47 it turns out when people [TS]

00:49:28   uh [TS]

00:49:30   this is something i didn't know but that [TS]

00:49:32   middle-aged white men are afforded [TS]

00:49:35   certain uh privileges in our society I [TS]

00:49:38   don't think that's accurate and and as a [TS]

00:49:41   right when i turned 47 all the sudden I [TS]

00:49:43   started getting treated differently i [TS]

00:49:45   was already traded with a lot of respect [TS]

00:49:46   just by General by the general [TS]

00:49:49   population after carrier mom's groceries [TS]

00:49:51   yeah yeah right exactly but Meryl I just [TS]

00:49:53   feel like I feel like the police are [TS]

00:49:55   very respectful i gotta pull I gotta [TS]

00:49:57   park are not a parking a speeding ticket [TS]

00:49:59   driving through pepperdine university [TS]

00:50:01   the other day in my RV and I was like [TS]

00:50:04   you know the this is a college campus in [TS]

00:50:07   there is no part of it where you can [TS]

00:50:09   drive an RV 60 miles an hour and that I [TS]

00:50:12   was like did you break that question in [TS]

00:50:13   two parts like you know I suppose I do a [TS]

00:50:15   lot of things are suffering do you mean [TS]

00:50:18   no place that's very poorly worded he [TS]

00:50:21   said when when you tried to stop it you [TS]

00:50:24   actually skidded to a stop but I was [TS]

00:50:26   like that was a big hill so I got a [TS]

00:50:30   speeding ticket but and so he handed me [TS]

00:50:32   the ticket to sign and I was very [TS]

00:50:34   frustrated with him because I was like [TS]

00:50:36   I'm in an RV like I want some special [TS]

00:50:39   dispensation here i just bought this [TS]

00:50:41   thing i'm driving to California doing [TS]

00:50:42   you a favor [TS]

00:50:43   absolutely should be excited for you I'm [TS]

00:50:45   bringing commerce to you yes and so he [TS]

00:50:47   handed me the ticket to sign and I was [TS]

00:50:49   feeling I was feeling very much like one [TS]

00:50:52   of those guys that's like I know my [TS]

00:50:53   rights only one of the YouTube guys [TS]

00:50:55   youtube guys it's like I don't have to [TS]

00:50:57   open my window more than one inch that's [TS]

00:50:59   just to be able to pass documents [TS]

00:51:01   through that's right and so the cop [TS]

00:51:03   hands meeting design and I drew and x su [TS]

00:51:05   on my signature internet and handed it [TS]

00:51:08   back to and he was a California state [TS]

00:51:10   highway patrolman Oh chip and he said [TS]

00:51:14   sir is that your signature and I said [TS]

00:51:20   they called me mr. X is that no let me [TS]

00:51:25   hand it back to me and I scrawled some [TS]

00:51:27   like battleship with gyro definitely [TS]

00:51:31   here [TS]

00:51:32   Mildred you're not gonna believe what [TS]

00:51:33   just happened I felt like a man decides [TS]

00:51:36   to get wrong [TS]

00:51:38   come on X you should have you been Jimmy [TS]

00:51:42   was last time somebody sign the ticket X [TS]

00:51:44   doesn't matter they'll be signed for [TS]

00:51:45   credit card you draw a tree on there i [TS]

00:51:47   can do it all the time you draw to draw [TS]

00:51:48   pictures of penis [TS]

00:51:49   I don't really that's not my style [TS]

00:51:52   that's not you but I do not make any [TS]

00:51:54   attempt to replicate my actual signature [TS]

00:51:57   looks terrific [TS]

00:51:59   I go Lou and a lot of times i make that [TS]

00:52:02   sound and I look at the cashier as I'm [TS]

00:52:04   drawing it right I don't look at what [TS]

00:52:07   i'm doing i just go really really rude [TS]

00:52:08   and they always laughing think I'm [TS]

00:52:11   charming people who deliver our [TS]

00:52:12   groceries will have to sign for [TS]

00:52:13   something they've stopped even asking me [TS]

00:52:15   they just signed himself now and I say [TS]

00:52:17   did you want me to sign sign that and [TS]

00:52:18   they go [TS]

00:52:19   that's right I'll do it well so this is [TS]

00:52:21   the crazy thing is that people continue [TS]

00:52:22   to send us PDFs on the internet and say [TS]

00:52:25   we need you to sign this in fact it back [TS]

00:52:27   and I'm like you bastards [TS]

00:52:29   you bastard his fax it back i will not [TS]

00:52:32   sign it and they're like well sorry but [TS]

00:52:34   we can't [TS]

00:52:35   yeah it's disgusting state of affairs [TS]

00:52:36   generalizing like a little bit about a [TS]

00:52:38   sponsor this week another sponsor this [TS]

00:52:40   is braintree braintree is code for easy [TS]

00:52:44   online payments you learn more by going [TS]

00:52:45   to braintree payments dot-com / [TS]

00:52:48   supertrain [TS]

00:52:49   he's braintree before I you have you [TS]

00:52:52   just didn't know it [TS]

00:52:53   what happened when was it all the time [TS]

00:52:54   you get John if you forgive me use the [TS]

00:52:56   number 0 answers yes yes yes have you [TS]

00:53:00   ever been to an Airbnb oh yes i just [TS]

00:53:03   recently was never I get on livingsocial [TS]

00:53:05   whatever that is [TS]

00:53:06   livingsocial all the times that like oh [TS]

00:53:08   yes i do go there and we've got monetary [TS]

00:53:10   delivered mantri terrible name for [TS]

00:53:12   company we've got mantri oh yes we have [TS]

00:53:14   you know that we should get on that [TS]

00:53:15   today instead of the eat those batteries [TS]

00:53:17   they they are the payment solution used [TS]

00:53:20   by companies like that did you know that [TS]

00:53:21   braintree braintree braintree is is [TS]

00:53:24   behind the scenes making all this [TS]

00:53:25   commerce happen that's an excellent [TS]

00:53:27   question John appreciate you asking me [TS]

00:53:28   that [TS]

00:53:29   what you do is you drop in some code and [TS]

00:53:30   get a full stack payment solution [TS]

00:53:32   uh code like like computer code code for [TS]

00:53:35   easy online payments so if your mobile [TS]

00:53:37   app developer you gotta check out [TS]

00:53:38   braintree here's the deal they made the [TS]

00:53:41   payment experiences in so many bf's all [TS]

00:53:43   the great app seamless and magical and [TS]

00:53:45   now you can add a similar experience to [TS]

00:53:47   your own app so this is this the [TS]

00:53:49   braintree is it isn't it is a thing that [TS]

00:53:51   you would use if you were building a nap [TS]

00:53:53   yes to build in the functionality of [TS]

00:53:55   online payments that's an excellent [TS]

00:53:57   question [TS]

00:53:58   Casper's mattress is a one-of-a-kind [TS]

00:54:00   hybrid mattress IC right and right and [TS]

00:54:03   so bring tree is not it's not a thing [TS]

00:54:05   that a consumer would you yes it's [TS]

00:54:08   absolutely the consumer uses not being [TS]

00:54:10   consumed by cause here's how it works [TS]

00:54:11   you've made a nap and I need to figure [TS]

00:54:12   out a way how to do what make money with [TS]

00:54:14   it yet so what you want to do is you [TS]

00:54:16   would have a way to drop in just a tiny [TS]

00:54:18   bit of code with that one easy [TS]

00:54:20   integration you can now have you can now [TS]

00:54:22   payments through what you got you got [TS]

00:54:23   paypal Apple pay right [TS]

00:54:25   bitcoin just so you saw me use Apple pay [TS]

00:54:27   today first time you've ever seen it i [TS]

00:54:28   did see you use Apple pay at the [TS]

00:54:29   walgreen Bitcoin venmo cards credit [TS]

00:54:32   cards and more always that one single [TS]

00:54:33   integration across all platforms [TS]

00:54:34   superior fraud protection customer [TS]

00:54:37   service and fast passed on my eyes are [TS]

00:54:40   literally salivating right now I can see [TS]

00:54:42   you can see their movie series fast i'm [TS]

00:54:44   extremely uncomfortable with this but I [TS]

00:54:45   have to continue because it's so [TS]

00:54:46   important for you to know that you can [TS]

00:54:47   learn more and get your first $50,000 [TS]

00:54:51   American and transactions be free by [TS]

00:54:53   going to braintree payments dot-com / [TS]

00:54:56   super trains you know that I didn't know [TS]

00:54:58   and it and it's a it's like a [TS]

00:55:00   symptomatic of our age yes if that [TS]

00:55:03   $50,000 in payments to your app would be [TS]

00:55:07   considered a like lost leader for this [TS]

00:55:11   company i'm not here to tell Brandi what [TS]

00:55:12   their model is I know that they're there [TS]

00:55:14   a terrific company get the simple [TS]

00:55:15   integrations you can get ready to [TS]

00:55:17   receive those payments quickly and [TS]

00:55:18   here's the thing branches continuous [TS]

00:55:19   support that means fast payouts means [TS]

00:55:22   you'll be prepared as your company grows [TS]

00:55:23   from your first dollar in my case to [TS]

00:55:26   your billion-dollar in John's case you [TS]

00:55:28   find out more about this right now [TS]

00:55:29   please go and have a look at you know [TS]

00:55:30   what to say the truth [TS]

00:55:31   turns out off the record i work with [TS]

00:55:33   these folks in the past so what I've [TS]

00:55:34   been in visit with them very fantastic [TS]

00:55:36   group you know the the to my favorite [TS]

00:55:38   two words in the English language I [TS]

00:55:39   didn't realize it until you just said [TS]

00:55:40   you've asked to pay out fast payouts i [TS]

00:55:43   love fat [TS]

00:55:44   oh my gosh I'll I can't even tell you [TS]

00:55:45   what a difference it makes for fast path [TS]

00:55:47   when I was back in the day when I was [TS]

00:55:48   getting slow payout was literally this [TS]

00:55:50   class I was like I was like what the [TS]

00:55:52   what the what [TS]

00:55:53   yeah you know you're sending your [TS]

00:55:55   sending postcards to people you're [TS]

00:55:57   calling him on the telephone said hey [TS]

00:55:58   you know the guy over here you're taking [TS]

00:56:01   out ads on a blimp sand-like pay me full [TS]

00:56:03   page and variety for full pigeon variety [TS]

00:56:06   sure pay me pay me fast payouts Amy a.m [TS]

00:56:11   fucker or whatever [TS]

00:56:12   yeah right fast payouts fast payday i [TS]

00:56:14   love a fastpass braintree payments calm [TS]

00:56:17   / supertrain fat [TS]

00:56:21   ask paths think we should start over [TS]

00:56:26   uh with what I can't you mean the whole [TS]

00:56:28   pod guys can't tell you about getting [TS]

00:56:30   running on the line I can't afford one [TS]

00:56:31   can't i can't tell if I either can't [TS]

00:56:36   feel my eyelids or if I feel them too [TS]

00:56:37   much your pupils are literally the size [TS]

00:56:39   of pies i think is I've never tasted [TS]

00:56:43   cumin in chinese food before you've [TS]

00:56:45   never tasted human and Chinese are just [TS]

00:56:47   let me walk that back [TS]

00:56:48   I've never tasted cumin ok chinese food [TS]

00:56:50   before there were all kinds of little [TS]

00:56:52   berries now that I'm thinking about it [TS]

00:56:54   there were little berries in that fish [TS]

00:56:57   dish like little strange little berries [TS]

00:56:59   not not like lychee fruit but like [TS]

00:57:01   little uh name and number there were [TS]

00:57:04   numbers they were being numbers i think [TS]

00:57:06   there might be some being there might be [TS]

00:57:07   I think it was a hot pepper nubbin there [TS]

00:57:09   are a lot of there was a kind of a [TS]

00:57:12   blooming flower blooming blooming onion [TS]

00:57:15   feeling like there's something rolling [TS]

00:57:17   out of the broth [TS]

00:57:19   maybe it was royal jelly it was heavily [TS]

00:57:21   and brought it does that mean by the [TS]

00:57:22   bees [TS]

00:57:23   yeah but and I feel like to get out of [TS]

00:57:25   the Queen's hive feel like there might [TS]

00:57:26   have been some B's you might have had [TS]

00:57:28   that on your old mattress that's what [TS]

00:57:29   for sure I did [TS]

00:57:30   that's why my tongue feels like i was [TS]

00:57:33   licking a battery it's because the [TS]

00:57:35   movies in the food and they were then [TS]

00:57:37   that's actually like beaver them myself [TS]

00:57:39   right [TS]

00:57:40   do you feel now that I've said it do you [TS]

00:57:41   feel like you had some bee venom today [TS]

00:57:43   you know what I couldn't promise you I [TS]

00:57:45   had no I feel I feel super-weird I think [TS]

00:57:48   something's happened I don't get food [TS]

00:57:49   poisoning is nothing like food poisoning [TS]

00:57:50   i think i might have like a third eye [TS]

00:57:53   I feel like I'm seeing stuff that I did [TS]

00:57:54   not I'm feeling stuff that i did not [TS]

00:57:56   feel before we had a lot of food we did [TS]

00:57:58   you know you look just like the baby in [TS]

00:58:00   eraserhead oh my god so do you [TS]

00:58:02   thank you what is that was that garlic [TS]

00:58:03   on the beans we have the green beans [TS]

00:58:05   they're not not the number being the [TS]

00:58:06   canonical beans green beans would like [TS]

00:58:08   without a garlic on it that's the thing [TS]

00:58:09   it didn't taste like garlic it tasted [TS]

00:58:11   like what 9-volt batteries just like a [TS]

00:58:14   one who phone might think of garlic [TS]

00:58:16   tasted like I i don't i cannot account [TS]

00:58:20   for the thing is I'm pretty invulnerable [TS]

00:58:22   to food poisoning [TS]

00:58:23   yes or ecoli really oh wait you have [TS]

00:58:27   reason for this right and also you dare [TS]

00:58:28   text you can get your tix right well so [TS]

00:58:31   I do test positive for the antibodies [TS]

00:58:33   for Lyme disease but I've never actually [TS]

00:58:36   contracted Lyme disease or maybe i have [TS]

00:58:39   lyme disease all the time but it hasn't [TS]

00:58:41   made me see your still narrowing these [TS]

00:58:43   things down yeah it's just made me [TS]

00:58:44   impervious I'm sort of like Dark Phoenix [TS]

00:58:47   where I'm impervious to live disease but [TS]

00:58:50   I can't bend my legs or sit but i have [TS]

00:58:53   great hair and I'm fighting crime in my [TS]

00:58:56   high heel samples [TS]

00:58:57   it's sort of like that yeah yeah yeah so [TS]

00:59:01   yeah there are a lot of things I you [TS]

00:59:02   know I ate a jack-in-the-box one many [TS]

00:59:06   years ago really right during the e.coli [TS]

00:59:08   thing that killed like a bunch of kids [TS]

00:59:10   and I got very sick but didn't kill me [TS]

00:59:15   because I'm strong like bull [TS]

00:59:16   probably but it actually made you [TS]

00:59:18   stronger i think it did I think it made [TS]

00:59:20   me impervious to that everything people [TS]

00:59:21   get food poisoning all around me and [TS]

00:59:23   everything I just affects you [TS]

00:59:26   I just assimilated into my muscles i [TS]

00:59:27   think it's because they're so because [TS]

00:59:29   I'm sleeping on a bed of penicillin [TS]

00:59:31   haha china i'm just going to the menu [TS]

00:59:32   quickly here i'm just looking at some of [TS]

00:59:34   the items see this is what's amazing is [TS]

00:59:36   that normally I said in front of a [TS]

00:59:37   computer and look at pictures of old [TS]

00:59:38   cars [TS]

00:59:39   I know but I'm seeing you scroll through [TS]

00:59:41   unix databases are you on the dark web [TS]

00:59:44   right now didn't say is this is ours is [TS]

00:59:46   a tour [TS]

00:59:47   I'm is a called working John ah here's a [TS]

00:59:50   couple of these gonna give you does not [TS]

00:59:52   working i'm looking at a Chinese menu [TS]

00:59:53   and picking up and used to have you seen [TS]

00:59:55   how fairly randomly these choices have [TS]

00:59:57   been you've seen me make a few choices [TS]

00:59:58   from this menu and paste [TS]

00:59:58   from this menu and paste [TS]

01:00:00   yeah that's right most online menu and [TS]

01:00:02   i'm copying pasting just the ones that I [TS]

01:00:03   could see why I'm very carefully listen [TS]

01:00:05   to what John is saying you are so many [TS]

01:00:06   items that are available on the menu [TS]

01:00:07   today you got the picture of a 13 at the [TS]

01:00:09   boil bullfrog stunning double stunning [TS]

01:00:14   double pepper fish head stunning stubble [TS]

01:00:17   pepper efficient sauerkraut tofu soup [TS]

01:00:21   yeah this is whatever you actually [TS]

01:00:22   saying you didn't want to try house [TS]

01:00:24   Trotter I don't want the house track I [TS]

01:00:26   know for sure I don't I've had it [TS]

01:00:29   if this Robin dictionary that house [TS]

01:00:31   Trotter don't want to be stronger [TS]

01:00:33   yeah I had I had how stronger i bet i've [TS]

01:00:35   had a hairy monk fish then and I had a [TS]

01:00:39   cleveland steamer and I don't want to do [TS]

01:00:41   acid acid drops beans pork [TS]

01:00:45   yeah i heard various about that acid [TS]

01:00:48   drops beans pork marinated fountain [TS]

01:00:50   marinated fountainhead marinated [TS]

01:00:53   fountain [TS]

01:00:53   I was just talking to somebody the other [TS]

01:00:55   day who is a medical examiner in Arizona [TS]

01:00:59   so nice [TS]

01:01:00   actually I was talking to someone who [TS]

01:01:02   knows a medical examiner in there some [TS]

01:01:04   good enough for podcast and um and the [TS]

01:01:07   medical examiner said that one of the [TS]

01:01:08   most common ways for people to die in [TS]

01:01:10   Arizona is that they get they get drunk [TS]

01:01:13   and they fall into the swimming pool [TS]

01:01:15   um so here that it seems like they would [TS]

01:01:18   know about that and take precautions i [TS]

01:01:20   can think of at least two things that [TS]

01:01:22   would help that from happening [TS]

01:01:23   what are the two don't get too drunk and [TS]

01:01:25   stay away from your fucking pool that's [TS]

01:01:26   right if you are too drunk [TS]

01:01:27   don't get near pool maybe maybe get [TS]

01:01:29   serious like remind you if I get super [TS]

01:01:31   fucking drunk don't go near the pool [TS]

01:01:32   your what are you feeling what is [TS]

01:01:35   whether the maybe maybe it's like eating [TS]

01:01:36   right maybe wait half an hour before you [TS]

01:01:38   go and so here they are their living by [TS]

01:01:39   themselves somewhere in Arizona that [TS]

01:01:41   could get too fucked up on little tiny [TS]

01:01:43   bottles of ships regal who and then they [TS]

01:01:46   walk out the back door they stumble and [TS]

01:01:48   fall into the swimming pool and died and [TS]

01:01:51   this is this is not just a thing that [TS]

01:01:52   has had an isolated occurrence it's not [TS]

01:01:54   like spontaneous human combustion it's a [TS]

01:01:56   cleaning the gun hurt yourself kind of [TS]

01:01:58   thing like it happen this happens all [TS]

01:01:59   the time [TS]

01:02:00   I'm so according to this friend of mine [TS]

01:02:02   who knows a medical examiner the medical [TS]

01:02:05   examiner said that what happened [TS]

01:02:08   when these people fall into the swimming [TS]

01:02:09   pool dead from drinking is that it's [TS]

01:02:11   very hot climate and that if they live [TS]

01:02:15   alone and are not discovered very soon [TS]

01:02:18   their bodies undergo decomposition no [TS]

01:02:22   floating in the pool and when they are [TS]

01:02:24   finally discovered by the medical [TS]

01:02:25   examiner they are a skeleton and then a [TS]

01:02:29   very thick sludge across the entire top [TS]

01:02:32   like a 2-inch like sludge across the [TS]

01:02:36   swimming pool pounds that take [TS]

01:02:38   well I don't know I'm not a medical exam [TS]

01:02:40   now but the it decays and your flesh [TS]

01:02:43   just like liquefies in the water and [TS]

01:02:46   went through the process of [TS]

01:02:48   decomposition oh my god and the skeleton [TS]

01:02:50   just sort of i and this is the the first [TS]

01:02:52   question I had of course natural [TS]

01:02:54   question i'm sure it's the first [TS]

01:02:55   question you and all of our listeners [TS]

01:02:56   are thinking yes does the cat skeleton [TS]

01:02:58   sink to the bottom or does the skeleton [TS]

01:03:00   float in the sludge i would probably I [TS]

01:03:02   was imagining it floating two feet below [TS]

01:03:04   the surface right just a little bit just [TS]

01:03:05   skeleton sort of mostly intact still [TS]

01:03:08   held together with the ligaments and [TS]

01:03:10   just sort of floating it's not just [TS]

01:03:12   bones is so that's that meat not mean [TS]

01:03:15   that muscles yeah it's just the whistle [TS]

01:03:17   whistle the crystals probably holding it [TS]

01:03:19   together and gristle [TS]

01:03:20   I mean I but this is the thing i don't [TS]

01:03:21   know maybe the heavy bones break break [TS]

01:03:23   and fall like the head of Famer [TS]

01:03:25   Yeah right right right so but the [TS]

01:03:28   medical examiner comes and it's like [TS]

01:03:29   okay there's like this like this the [TS]

01:03:32   sludge this sort of oily like top [TS]

01:03:35   surface that we have to see what's let's [TS]

01:03:37   get on soup you have to skim it when [TS]

01:03:40   you're going to saving at the baguette [TS]

01:03:41   baguette a get you taken back to HQ [TS]

01:03:43   right she bagged it you take it because [TS]

01:03:45   some some relatives going to want that [TS]

01:03:47   to bury it with with an American flag [TS]

01:03:49   over the casket yeah yeah good thanks [TS]

01:03:51   for service [TS]

01:03:51   that's right and so I've been thinking [TS]

01:03:53   about that all day of cheese and feeling [TS]

01:03:56   like that's kind of an interesting sort [TS]

01:04:00   of phenomenon that doesn't actually [TS]

01:04:01   sound like that bad of a way to go white [TS]

01:04:02   oil sausage philippine sweet intestine a [TS]

01:04:07   lot of my sweet intestine to be made in [TS]

01:04:10   the Cambodian style large pan of chicken [TS]

01:04:12   haha [TS]

01:04:14   uh-huh and one another one remember [TS]

01:04:16   specifically Nixon was half 1111 meat [TS]

01:04:18   section I didn't want 11 meat section [TS]

01:04:20   either [TS]

01:04:21   yeah I I you know I don't like meat [TS]

01:04:23   section from the LaVon I i prefer your [TS]

01:04:26   sorry butt so I the other poke the [TS]

01:04:30   second poke the second one having any [TS]

01:04:32   way you can actually see our thanks to [TS]

01:04:33   braintree for supporting our online next [TS]

01:04:35   victory [TS]

01:04:36   yeah thnkx for a speedy p-speed payment [TS]

01:04:39   fast payouts I don't feel like myself [TS]

01:04:44   John maybe it's just more nuts i don't i [TS]

01:04:46   don't feel right [TS]

01:04:47   nothing is you look great i took a [TS]

01:04:48   picture of you earlier today that was [TS]

01:04:49   like a sort of a comedy picture you know [TS]

01:04:51   where you looked a little bit like hey [TS]

01:04:53   man just gonna finally figured out where [TS]

01:04:58   you got that from what I totally got it [TS]

01:05:01   what dan Aykroyd and trading places in [TS]

01:05:04   my rights exam you didn't he didn't even [TS]

01:05:08   identified it before [TS]

01:05:09   that's it here in Santa cost ya he pulls [TS]

01:05:12   the salmon out of the seven girls yeah [TS]

01:05:14   I've been using that for years i did not [TS]

01:05:18   know them with that [TS]

01:05:20   oh my god that movie is so good he's not [TS]

01:05:22   ceased and thank you this Merlin special [TS]

01:05:23   blend [TS]

01:05:24   he's standing outside the restaurant [TS]

01:05:26   looking in and he pulls the people's the [TS]

01:05:28   ruthless compassion is because got a [TS]

01:05:30   whole fish he just needs a covered went [TS]

01:05:32   to better care Santa arrow i watched a [TS]

01:05:35   hotel room [TS]

01:05:36   listen is great i thank you thank you [TS]

01:05:39   for getting that my god my god [TS]

01:05:42   mm you know give me people pay us for [TS]

01:05:46   the show admit the bonus episode how so [TS]

01:05:48   how how would this be a bone alright [TS]

01:05:50   people would have to pay extra [TS]

01:05:52   yeah maybe like you have to patreon me [TS]

01:05:53   because this isn't normal it's not [TS]

01:05:55   economical episode this is like you [TS]

01:05:56   Senora know you mean like this like a [TS]

01:05:58   special like a like a like a like a [TS]

01:06:01   giant-size x-men like this is only [TS]

01:06:02   happen once a year an annual yeah I [TS]

01:06:05   don't get the x-men she's in x-men who [TS]

01:06:07   that Marvel girl AKA his kid girl you [TS]

01:06:11   got working in their hear you talking [TS]

01:06:13   like Romo so which one is in the x-men [TS]

01:06:16   is that the the dark one of the [TS]

01:06:18   Greenland [TS]

01:06:19   same person lion also spider woman's she [TS]

01:06:25   also can't sit down oh my goodness her [TS]

01:06:27   butt cheeks are larger than life I said [TS]

01:06:32   I support this character of the black [TS]

01:06:35   queen how many versions Phoenix happen [TS]

01:06:38   why does she [TS]

01:06:39   this looks like the this she looks very [TS]

01:06:42   much like the Red Queen in Game of [TS]

01:06:43   Thrones yeah except the Red Queen would [TS]

01:06:45   not wear this terrible black diaper I [TS]

01:06:48   like marble girl and this is Iron Fist [TS]

01:06:52   ok so iron fist is for dorks the only [TS]

01:06:56   person that will play with iron fist [TS]

01:06:58   totally [TS]

01:06:59   this is a badass whole fucking he stuck [TS]

01:07:02   his hands into a Dragonman he had he [TS]

01:07:04   looks like it looks like powder blue [TS]

01:07:07   Batman except instead of a bat symbol [TS]

01:07:09   it's exactly the bat symbol except the [TS]

01:07:12   bad has a long neck and it's a dragon so [TS]

01:07:15   this guy is a total frickin door total [TS]

01:07:17   badass now marvel he's got a netflix [TS]

01:07:19   show coming [TS]

01:07:20   what the dingling here now fist iron [TS]

01:07:23   fist why don't we calm dragon boy [TS]

01:07:25   write that down so Marvel girl is great [TS]

01:07:29   she looks like somebody that would be in [TS]

01:07:32   the sixties Batman show [TS]

01:07:33   yeah and she has knee high stockings [TS]

01:07:37   I think those are boots oh well I prefer [TS]

01:07:41   to think of them as knee-high socks all [TS]

01:07:42   right she's not wearing pantyhose [TS]

01:07:44   she has a little skirt and underneath [TS]

01:07:46   the skirt you can see her panties which [TS]

01:07:48   are she has green panties and she's just [TS]

01:07:52   really got a nice body very cute very [TS]

01:07:55   lovely girl original she has oh well [TS]

01:07:58   that's a little bored to be a mirror but [TS]

01:07:59   she's still very pretty redhair some [TS]

01:08:03   kind of stupid green Batman master that [TS]

01:08:06   you might wear to a like a Venetian New [TS]

01:08:09   Year's Eve party huh [TS]

01:08:10   I think she's my favorite so far and [TS]

01:08:13   there's then there's the queen is not [TS]

01:08:15   wearing her her cape and that one well [TS]

01:08:18   she's business after she's been brought [TS]

01:08:19   into the Hellfire Club in there [TS]

01:08:20   controlling your mind i see she's [TS]

01:08:22   wearing a bra now which is like okay [TS]

01:08:24   yeah put on a shirt and then she has [TS]

01:08:27   some gloves that go all the way up to [TS]

01:08:30   the top of her arm heart superhero in [TS]

01:08:32   pretty [TS]

01:08:32   pretty hot though and then in her than [TS]

01:08:35   her pants are like diapers with some of [TS]

01:08:38   it like black she's diapers with black [TS]

01:08:40   stockings coming out of them as you know [TS]

01:08:43   that's and somebody somebody in Berlin [TS]

01:08:45   and that their special thing I remember [TS]

01:08:47   she's wearing her hair in a bun [TS]

01:08:50   mrs. Garrett was like oh I'm gonna do [TS]

01:08:52   some superhero and how many of my hair [TS]

01:08:54   up in a bun [TS]

01:08:54   she's like hot mrs. Garrett and then a [TS]

01:08:56   dog collar so that is absolutely some [TS]

01:09:00   fucked-up thing that only a German would [TS]

01:09:02   understand [TS]

01:09:03   so anyways Hanley and then here is [TS]

01:09:07   Batgirl know it's awful lot of crisis [TS]

01:09:10   can't 10 Catwoman or no spider-woman [TS]

01:09:12   know what I say spider professor catgirl [TS]

01:09:14   know she spotted it can't feel my I'll [TS]

01:09:17   it has spider girl has like that wings [TS]

01:09:22   spiders don't have we should do what I [TS]

01:09:24   think they don't see it flows really [TS]

01:09:27   spider-girl why don't you have witnesses [TS]

01:09:29   spider-woman it's not a the third know [TS]

01:09:31   wings on a spider [TS]

01:09:32   she's English other wings on English [TS]

01:09:35   spiders don't fly have them [TS]

01:09:37   ok so that that explains that [TS]

01:09:41   yeah but more than any other of the [TS]

01:09:43   superhero dolls that you've handed me [TS]

01:09:45   what with the possible exception of [TS]

01:09:46   Marvel girl who she has a very [TS]

01:09:49   anatomically correct and interesting [TS]

01:09:52   they frequently draw her a friendly draw [TS]

01:09:54   her bosoms a little on the large side no [TS]

01:09:56   not it's not my favorite thing they do [TS]

01:09:57   about her but sometimes i make her [TS]

01:09:58   bosoms a little large a costume the [TS]

01:10:00   whole design of the costume does not [TS]

01:10:02   evoke a spider as much as it evokes a [TS]

01:10:04   bustier yeah and its really pointing a [TS]

01:10:07   lot of vectors at her boobs [TS]

01:10:10   she's got a lot of powers but then you [TS]

01:10:12   should know about pheromone you turn [TS]

01:10:13   around and her name is so absolutely [TS]

01:10:18   crafted I mean there is somebody making [TS]

01:10:20   a hundred eighty thousand dollars a year [TS]

01:10:22   at Marvel whose only job is to use a [TS]

01:10:25   putty knife to make this crap the spider [TS]

01:10:27   and make this ass so that it looks like [TS]

01:10:31   something from us from like a seventies [TS]

01:10:34   Playboy and it's it feels like if this [TS]

01:10:36   was really your superhero costume you [TS]

01:10:39   would spend half of your superhero I'm [TS]

01:10:41   just pluck it out pulling it out of your [TS]

01:10:43   butt chance i would find it hard to [TS]

01:10:44   focus [TS]

01:10:45   yeah you're like I'm sure I can shoot [TS]

01:10:47   electricity [TS]

01:10:49   she has a lot more money than pirate [TS]

01:10:51   powers of spider-man [TS]

01:10:52   I don't remember him having the power to [TS]

01:10:54   shoot electricity little plus she can do [TS]

01:10:56   electricity stuff pheromones she can [TS]

01:10:58   basically she's very persuasive with [TS]

01:11:00   anybody but especially men because she's [TS]

01:11:01   pheromones spiders i do not find are [TS]

01:11:04   very persuasive when I don't [TS]

01:11:07   particularly interesting far as you [TS]

01:11:08   remember why would they call her spider [TS]

01:11:10   going not like electricity Batgirl or [TS]

01:11:13   like persuasive a butterfly girl who [TS]

01:11:17   only these are butterfly wings either [TS]

01:11:19   they are just full-on bat wings there's [TS]

01:11:22   no other way to describe them yellow bat [TS]

01:11:24   wings so she's electricity but girl here [TS]

01:11:28   but that girl that girl [TS]

01:11:30   about Batgirl just decided a couple of [TS]

01:11:33   breaking announces got a few more dishes [TS]

01:11:35   for the place where we had lunch tomato [TS]

01:11:37   lettuce elucidate Morgan she's my auntie [TS]

01:11:39   awful good well they're recommending [TS]

01:11:40   homemade blend they're cutting the [TS]

01:11:42   chemistry right out of my get away we [TS]

01:11:45   know there's a whole another dollar [TS]

01:11:46   that's a diff that's different smaller [TS]

01:11:47   Spider Woman Spiderman was different [TS]

01:11:49   scale John I don't feel like these wings [TS]

01:11:51   are functional yet to item I to which is [TS]

01:11:54   Christmas present the mum this is under [TS]

01:11:56   northeast tasty hot spicy section is [TS]

01:11:59   called northeast tasty hot spicy let me [TS]

01:12:01   just a reference the smaller background [TS]

01:12:02   yeah everything about her is different [TS]

01:12:05   the color of her costume is different [TS]

01:12:06   yeah the way the wings work the color of [TS]

01:12:08   the wings and everything is different [TS]

01:12:10   except the shape of her ass which is [TS]

01:12:12   exactly this exquisite this is yeah it's [TS]

01:12:15   a smaller version and it's just the [TS]

01:12:17   identical and they wanna make sure it's [TS]

01:12:18   not out of period northeast tasty hot [TS]

01:12:21   spicy get item i ate parsley parsley [TS]

01:12:26   yeah I 18 which is mutton I 16 you've [TS]

01:12:29   got you've got lunch and me I don't [TS]

01:12:32   remember business section called [TS]

01:12:33   northeast tasty hot spicy [TS]

01:12:35   I don't know what these items are we [TS]

01:12:36   should just as parsley i'm guessing this [TS]

01:12:39   is something from northeast China that [TS]

01:12:41   we don't normally income yeah [TS]

01:12:42   this and i know i'm trying to think of [TS]

01:12:44   what is happening in northeast China [TS]

01:12:46   it's like what's going on up there [TS]

01:12:49   raves the house music is that where it [TS]

01:12:52   is [TS]

01:12:52   Northeastern's Manchester i'm thinking [TS]

01:12:54   is you're right i got homemade meat [TS]

01:12:56   droppings vermicelli corn segment your [TS]

01:13:00   tricorn segment I think that when I [TS]

01:13:03   think the word segment home thinking of [TS]

01:13:05   something from the insect day genus oh [TS]

01:13:09   except IE yeah house Trotter know you [TS]

01:13:14   know that better [TS]

01:13:16   I honestly can barely feel my eyes at [TS]

01:13:18   all which is a good opportunity to say [TS]

01:13:19   hey you know I would let you know this [TS]

01:13:21   episode of rotting on the line is [TS]

01:13:22   brought to you in part by our friends at [TS]

01:13:23   Squarespace while we are three sponsor [TS]

01:13:27   episode yeah 3 sponsors let's talk about [TS]

01:13:30   Squarespace Squarespace circular or [TS]

01:13:32   aspects ways you can learn more about [TS]

01:13:34   Squarespace by point your browser to [TS]

01:13:35   squarespace.com John did you know John [TS]

01:13:39   John we're going to Instagram what you [TS]

01:13:41   doing [TS]

01:13:41   um no I'mI'm just don't take any photos [TS]

01:13:44   that identify my location [TS]

01:13:45   okay all right no go ahead fine um look [TS]

01:13:48   handsome for it to another kind you want [TS]

01:13:49   to photograph all right here of you in [TS]

01:13:51   action this is the thing I've never done [TS]

01:13:52   a picture of you while you were part [TS]

01:13:54   lies podcasting from hydrogen peroxide [TS]

01:13:56   or people want to hear hold up the [TS]

01:13:57   hydrogen peroxide people want to know [TS]

01:13:59   what really happens here behind the [TS]

01:14:00   scenes [TS]

01:14:03   alexa deploy hydrogen peroxide just [TS]

01:14:11   fucking turned herself off my good old [TS]

01:14:13   man that was soup all my god what just [TS]

01:14:16   happened I don't know [TS]

01:14:17   did you hear it too yeah she came alive [TS]

01:14:19   she thought about it and then she went [TS]

01:14:22   we blew I've been a huge fan and [TS]

01:14:24   evangelist of Squarespace now for over [TS]

01:14:26   five years John if you're aware of this [TS]

01:14:27   but our site is hosted on Squarespace I [TS]

01:14:29   didn't know that [TS]

01:14:31   yes I do quite a bit of corresponding [TS]

01:14:33   with the people at Squarespace tell ya [TS]

01:14:34   design things i do that sign a few [TS]

01:14:36   things i sent him back right [TS]

01:14:39   I bring them out Squarespace is terrific [TS]

01:14:41   and and i've been using for years and if [TS]

01:14:43   you listen to this podcast right now [TS]

01:14:44   which I have to assume you are because [TS]

01:14:45   you are you are listening that because [TS]

01:14:47   of my Squarespace that is where we host [TS]

01:14:49   this podcast is where our show lives i [TS]

01:14:51   can tell you is the first place i [TS]

01:14:52   recommend for anybody wanting to do what [TS]

01:14:54   we do [TS]

01:14:55   that means if you want to have a blog if [TS]

01:14:56   you want to if you want to have a [TS]

01:14:57   portfolio gallery check if you have an [TS]

01:14:59   online store you can do all that they [TS]

01:15:01   have an ecommerce package that is out of [TS]

01:15:03   control of your digits where this story [TS]

01:15:06   you know ecommerce is a thing that still [TS]

01:15:08   intrigues me [TS]

01:15:09   you can tell he's got nothing but i [TS]

01:15:12   would say it's my fight not even a joke [TS]

01:15:13   it's not easy that's not even a joke you [TS]

01:15:16   know you can't pull the wool over her [TS]

01:15:17   eyes get big and yeah she's big and she [TS]

01:15:19   doesn't take shouldn't take a lot of [TS]

01:15:21   monkey does not suffer fools which is a [TS]

01:15:23   problem for me let me ask you a question [TS]

01:15:26   Squarespace let's say someone is [TS]

01:15:29   listening to this podcast far far far in [TS]

01:15:31   the future this is the thing we've [TS]

01:15:33   considered before thing that I think [TS]

01:15:35   about all the time you think about a lot [TS]

01:15:36   let's say seven hundred years from now [TS]

01:15:39   someone is thinking about the 21st [TS]

01:15:42   century and they're like scouring [TS]

01:15:45   through all the data who maybe they have [TS]

01:15:48   a super intelligence this person [TS]

01:15:50   alright and they are like listening to [TS]

01:15:53   be a 25 podcast a time and you get to [TS]

01:15:56   this ad read where you say if you're [TS]

01:15:59   listening to this podcast which you are [TS]

01:16:00   and they're gonna think about that [TS]

01:16:03   consider that with their super [TS]

01:16:04   intelligence and they're gonna be like [TS]

01:16:05   incontrovertible who and then you say [TS]

01:16:08   you're listening to this on Squarespace [TS]

01:16:10   my question to you is will they still be [TS]

01:16:13   listening to it on Squarespace [TS]

01:16:16   I'm gonna say yes uh-huh i'm gonna say [TS]

01:16:21   yes because its course this is really [TS]

01:16:22   smart and I have not read as much [TS]

01:16:23   science science fiction as you have but [TS]

01:16:25   i think there may come a day when [TS]

01:16:27   Squarespace i don't know i did i do not [TS]

01:16:29   proprietary here's the thing you can put [TS]

01:16:31   whatever you want to squarespace it [TS]

01:16:32   doesn't even have to be good really it [TS]

01:16:33   should be good just because you care a [TS]

01:16:35   lot [TS]

01:16:36   oh my god child is build assaults are [TS]

01:16:37   home like I don't know I wasn't a woman [TS]

01:16:39   listening to this the the squarespace [TS]

01:16:41   facing that's so intently that I spilled [TS]

01:16:44   the Seltzer on the spider girl boom on [TS]

01:16:47   the spider girls but which got its got [TS]

01:16:49   electric I'm thinking why didn't I think [TS]

01:16:51   of this before [TS]

01:16:52   pheromones so Squarespace you're saying [TS]

01:16:55   seven hundred years from now you're [TS]

01:16:57   saying Squarespace has become self-aware [TS]

01:16:59   yes also the sites are professionally [TS]

01:17:01   designed masterpieces look great right [TS]

01:17:03   out of the box that's regardless of your [TS]

01:17:05   skill level zero coding nerdery required [TS]

01:17:08   it's so great to use they have easy [TS]

01:17:10   intuitive easy-to-use tools that take [TS]

01:17:11   all the pain out of getting your stuff [TS]

01:17:12   up [TS]

01:17:13   they also have state-of-the-art [TS]

01:17:14   technology powering your site that [TS]

01:17:16   ensure security and stability even if [TS]

01:17:18   you get a link from a major internet [TS]

01:17:19   personality like John Roderick I wish [TS]

01:17:22   that I had something that would take [TS]

01:17:23   some of the pain out of getting my stuff [TS]

01:17:24   up to throw a lot of lumber I do [TS]

01:17:28   whoo-hoo mhm I trouble would you give [TS]

01:17:32   you give me a linky take Sam I'll tell [TS]

01:17:34   you what [TS]

01:17:35   yeah how do you feel like how do you [TS]

01:17:36   feel Squarespace is going to receive [TS]

01:17:38   this ad read bury the needle what time [TS]

01:17:42   and what do i wear a crazy part is [TS]

01:17:45   Squarespace plant start very affordable [TS]

01:17:48   eight dollars eight dollars per month [TS]

01:17:50   are you kidding me eight dollars per [TS]

01:17:52   month you can't even smoke cigarettes [TS]

01:17:53   for eight dollars a month it's a new [TS]

01:17:55   kind of hybrid mattress that price even [TS]

01:17:57   includes a free domain name if you sign [TS]

01:17:59   up for a year which you should totally [TS]

01:18:00   do so you can check these folks I [TS]

01:18:02   honestly i'm using for years I you know [TS]

01:18:04   the thing is you meet people and then I [TS]

01:18:06   got against think my eight people may be [TS]

01:18:08   that voice breaking stop at me this day [TS]

01:18:12   for Shaq why should not get on mr. [TS]

01:18:16   Goddard I don't know how to host my web [TS]

01:18:19   comedian auction page for high school [TS]

01:18:21   side my church once online [TS]

01:18:24   when do I get that and you know used to [TS]

01:18:28   be good right give me the ftp password [TS]

01:18:30   I'll go take care of everything give me [TS]

01:18:32   your password files and i get no more my [TS]

01:18:34   God if I could if I had a dollar for [TS]

01:18:36   everytime i said how many times you [TS]

01:18:37   agree to take 150 pounds for me all your [TS]

01:18:39   ftp is all you're going on and you're [TS]

01:18:41   actually to make the great ftps and i'll [TS]

01:18:44   put them all together in 45 you gotta [TS]

01:18:47   chip Spider Woman is angry [TS]

01:18:51   you gotta check these guys out and tell [TS]

01:18:53   your friends about it you can start your [TS]

01:18:54   free trial today with no credit card [TS]

01:18:55   required by visiting squarespace.com we [TS]

01:18:58   decided to sign up for Squarespace make [TS]

01:19:00   sure to use the very special offer code [TS]

01:19:02   supertrain whoa super train hit you've [TS]

01:19:06   never heard our show and he doesn't if [TS]

01:19:08   you put the word supertrain into the [TS]

01:19:09   internet and himes it [TS]

01:19:11   yeah yeah then the the spider girl [TS]

01:19:14   becomes for your kind of hybrid mattress [TS]

01:19:16   so make sure to use the offer code [TS]

01:19:17   supertrain you ten percent off your [TS]

01:19:20   first purchase our thang Squarespace for [TS]

01:19:22   supporting rod online and all the great [TS]

01:19:24   show you basically can't afford not to [TS]

01:19:25   do it [TS]

01:19:26   you literally cannot afford not to use [TS]

01:19:28   Squarespace not to use Squarespace fresh [TS]

01:19:30   mushrooms lunch and meet you but [TS]

01:19:32   something called yuba isn't that a city [TS]

01:19:34   in Arizona think it's you or Zuma zuma [TS]

01:19:36   might be any young album I thought Zuma [TS]

01:19:38   was that weird vodka drink that tasted [TS]

01:19:40   like like treacle what's comes a time [TS]

01:19:43   that's the country album i'm not sure [TS]

01:19:45   but i don't wrinkle the was staying in [TS]

01:19:46   it [TS]

01:19:47   right that's true i do know that [TS]

01:19:48   northeast China is called Manchuria [TS]

01:19:50   Manchuria so this korean food you're [TS]

01:19:54   looking at [TS]

01:19:55   oh and they all about this how about [TS]

01:19:57   this oh my god what do I begin John [TS]

01:19:58   these days so goddamn weird to have [TS]

01:20:00   anything like pot stickers or is adored [TS]

01:20:03   him some potstickers are doing and what [TS]

01:20:05   was the noise it is facing maybe try the [TS]

01:20:08   guy laughing literally laughed he [TS]

01:20:10   laughed uncomfortably but what it was a [TS]

01:20:12   lad was it like as if I'd asked for a [TS]

01:20:14   cock in a 7-up feels like it's like pop [TS]

01:20:18   stickers potstickers an unusual thing to [TS]

01:20:21   ask for you want to think which is what [TS]

01:20:23   you want what you want to you that what [TS]

01:20:26   t we don't have that in Manchuria [TS]

01:20:30   already check a check for what you want [TS]

01:20:33   to do is see pretty checkmark next to [TS]

01:20:36   your name you want to be verified by us [TS]

01:20:38   you want a pepsi you gotta pay me it's [TS]

01:20:39   not free pepsi free yeah [TS]

01:20:41   homemade you like Kipling I don't know [TS]

01:20:43   I've never could never get old homemade [TS]

01:20:46   should do punch lines from our favorite [TS]

01:20:49   jokes when you find so anyway thank you [TS]

01:20:51   to cast by the soup and this guy over [TS]

01:20:53   here we got to get you over here [TS]

01:20:56   stand back Eve I don't know how big this [TS]

01:20:59   thing gets stand back [TS]

01:21:01   that's good that's where the all-time [TS]

01:21:02   greatest joke Stan backe I don't have a [TS]

01:21:04   big this thing gets yeah that's pretty [TS]

01:21:06   good yeah ever since I've been taking [TS]

01:21:08   this bipolar medication [TS]

01:21:09   yeah so somebody tweeted me I so we [TS]

01:21:10   talked about we get and then somebody to [TS]

01:21:12   me they're like I'm on that same [TS]

01:21:13   medication but I makes me horny all the [TS]

01:21:15   toes and I was like this is a la sonya [TS]

01:21:20   ville what's likely it's nylon cha to [TS]

01:21:23   Montmartre Gil it's a la loire en la a [TS]

01:21:28   train [TS]

01:21:29   Peter Lawford ssin and I was like nikto [TS]

01:21:33   are also known as lamotrigine [TS]

01:21:35   lamotrigine dancing for luck to change [TS]

01:21:37   and I said I don't see a world in which [TS]

01:21:41   being horny all the time is like a bad [TS]

01:21:43   side effects i don't know how the time [TS]

01:21:46   is pretty good [TS]

01:21:47   that's a thing that a lot of people [TS]

01:21:48   would appreciate sure I mean there's a [TS]

01:21:50   lot of folks I don't want to put too [TS]

01:21:52   fine a point on it a lot of guys would [TS]

01:21:53   take a whole different medicines to get [TS]

01:21:54   more that's right people are buying [TS]

01:21:55   medicine line from Russia because it [TS]

01:21:58   promises to make you horny my pants fit [TS]

01:21:59   too well most the time and this guy [TS]

01:22:01   wrote me back and he said well I'm [TS]

01:22:03   single it doesn't help me an odd [TS]

01:22:05   response that's really funny [TS]

01:22:07   let me recommend masturbating which is [TS]

01:22:10   amazing is that this is still part of [TS]

01:22:13   the square spoon and read i think it's [TS]

01:22:15   i'm not really sure where any of you had [TS]

01:22:16   to stop at this home so I feel like it's [TS]

01:22:19   a new kind of hybrid mattress house [TS]

01:22:21   Trotter if you are horny all the time [TS]

01:22:25   you can solve that problem is with a [TS]

01:22:29   very pleasurable activity that you can [TS]

01:22:31   do almost anywhere this is the one [TS]

01:22:33   surprising tip for somebody's horny [TS]

01:22:35   you won't believe what happens next if [TS]

01:22:37   you're horny yes you don't have to fuck [TS]

01:22:39   a gatorade Bob keeping you don't have to [TS]

01:22:43   cut you don't have to cut a hole in the [TS]

01:22:45   drywall is it [TS]

01:22:46   somewhere like a funny officers were [TS]

01:22:47   like sexy outfit the gatorade bottle [TS]

01:22:49   right the gatorade bottle is made to [TS]

01:22:52   look like human but sales made to look [TS]

01:22:54   like spider woman's butt and it and they [TS]

01:22:58   could actually sell those huh [TS]

01:23:00   no you can just you can turn off the [TS]

01:23:01   lights even have you see like where you [TS]

01:23:03   can buy a foot that you can fuck you can [TS]

01:23:05   use all kinds [TS]

01:23:06   yeah yeah outside of Germany now is I'm [TS]

01:23:08   pretty sure you can get it if it's a [TS]

01:23:10   boost Schieffer services Joseph [TS]

01:23:13   Pacifican ya know ? low starting soon [TS]

01:23:16   houston shooting footage yeah haha well [TS]

01:23:20   she's looking through swimmer you know [TS]

01:23:21   when they start with these just like [TS]

01:23:23   fucking foot so it's a it's a it's a [TS]

01:23:25   thing if you like to fuck feet and it's [TS]

01:23:27   a place like a like a oh my god [TS]

01:23:30   so wait a minute you're not meant to put [TS]

01:23:32   your penis between the toes know there's [TS]

01:23:34   a MacGuffin inside the MacGuffin you [TS]

01:23:36   start out thinking it's Puckle foot its [TS]

01:23:37   thing you rub on yeah you're right i did [TS]

01:23:39   i'm talking about real it'll be a little [TS]

01:23:41   too organic and I don't feel about the [TS]

01:23:42   story about the posies the poses on tour [TS]

01:23:49   in spain and the drummer was asleep in [TS]

01:23:51   his bed and he woke up in the bass [TS]

01:23:52   player and his dick between his toes and [TS]

01:23:55   was just it was just fucking his foot [TS]

01:23:57   and the drugs like the drummer's like [TS]

01:23:58   what are you doing in the database was [TS]

01:24:00   just laughing and he's like I'm fucking [TS]

01:24:02   your foot [TS]

01:24:03   he's just fucking his foot are you [TS]

01:24:05   kidding was sleeping this is the poses [TS]

01:24:07   this is why you shouldn't look how long [TS]

01:24:09   ago I was a while back [TS]

01:24:10   ok I mean it's not not not the new Posey [TS]

01:24:14   not getting oranger uh no no pre him but [TS]

01:24:17   this is different than that yeah this is [TS]

01:24:19   this is real super specialized yeah this [TS]

01:24:22   is a foot which looks like a severed [TS]

01:24:25   foot and you can see what the name of [TS]

01:24:27   what the item is called it's no it's [TS]

01:24:29   called I can tell this is real estate [TS]

01:24:30   fools God is on gizmodo and they have [TS]

01:24:33   their renowned for their sense of humor [TS]

01:24:34   right saying you can't be wrong [TS]

01:24:36   uh and so instead of this is almost to [TS]

01:24:40   the thing is it's called The Jackal the [TS]

01:24:43   gentle and what it is is it's the it's [TS]

01:24:47   you're not putting your actually where [TS]

01:24:49   the where the bone would be where the [TS]

01:24:51   leg bone is connected to the ankle bone [TS]

01:24:55   I don't think you want to overcomplicate [TS]

01:24:56   this if you if you cut off a foot just [TS]

01:24:58   above the ankle and put a vagina [TS]

01:25:00   it struck it nothing would be if you put [TS]

01:25:02   a an anatomically correct vagina inside [TS]

01:25:05   the top of a severed foot right you [TS]

01:25:08   would have this device with Scott [TS]

01:25:09   toenails and everything John yeah yeah [TS]

01:25:11   it's a no it's a very accurate foot and [TS]

01:25:12   it does not look like a lady's foot now [TS]

01:25:14   it doesn't and it looks like somebody's [TS]

01:25:17   cousins foot so you see it looks like a [TS]

01:25:19   hobbit foot frankly shave topic and you [TS]

01:25:23   would use this pleasure yourself but I [TS]

01:25:27   don't have a foot fetish missed because [TS]

01:25:30   it really for a foot fetishes [TS]

01:25:31   it's for a disembodied your ankle with a [TS]

01:25:34   vagina infectious somebody who wants to [TS]

01:25:36   have sex with every part of your body [TS]

01:25:38   one at a time like after but like to [TS]

01:25:40   have this a doctor Moreau level of [TS]

01:25:42   authenticity to think where they would [TS]

01:25:44   normally be just the rest of a person [TS]

01:25:45   yeah there's a there's a absolute [TS]

01:25:47   uncanny valley problem here and I can [TS]

01:25:50   only imagine the most foot fetishists [TS]

01:25:52   would want to put a sock and shoe on it [TS]

01:25:54   sure where you just get something just [TS]

01:25:56   looks like a regular foot without a [TS]

01:25:57   vagina on it you know it's a little bit [TS]

01:25:59   a little bit of you know chocolate [TS]

01:26:01   peanut butter six situation except once [TS]

01:26:02   the vagina yeah if you just want to like [TS]

01:26:04   worship foot yes [TS]

01:26:05   you don't want a general on it yeah the [TS]

01:26:08   genes-- belong in a certain place that's [TS]

01:26:10   true yeah well which is to say that the [TS]

01:26:13   top of the Gator house Trotter tasty [TS]

01:26:16   craw fish [TS]

01:26:17   you see I can name every kind of chinese [TS]

01:26:18   food we got chron fish the canyon and [TS]

01:26:23   hawthorne sugar coasted hard [TS]

01:26:25   what the fuck does that mean chief for [TS]

01:26:28   Hawthorn sugar-coated Hawes was a haha [TS]

01:26:30   it's some kind of Trotter oh look how [TS]

01:26:33   strong a whole different from us and [TS]

01:26:35   adding a hot it is very much isn't a [TS]

01:26:38   haul some kind of a pig's foot snow [TS]

01:26:40   cotton hummus but what is hawthorne what [TS]

01:26:42   haha that's where the beach boys are [TS]

01:26:43   from right so what does that have to do [TS]

01:26:45   with the sugar-coated Paul might be like [TS]

01:26:48   i might be like this and a brown sugar [TS]

01:26:49   daddy or sugar damn right [TS]

01:26:51   what the guys are really know what I [TS]

01:26:53   would like everyone to call me sugar [TS]

01:26:54   daddy from now [TS]

01:26:56   God will feel good chicken gizzard [TS]

01:27:01   string you look great [TS]

01:27:02   I don't know what how to make straight [TS]

01:27:04   out of a chicken I see I'm trying to [TS]

01:27:05   figure out they just define replacing [TS]

01:27:07   forget to string beans but there's but [TS]

01:27:09   yes you can give some strings [TS]

01:27:10   ok John this is under northeast Xianyang [TS]

01:27:12   tasty barbecue so we're going to assume [TS]

01:27:14   that this is Manchurian you're assuming [TS]

01:27:17   that yeah i'm gonna i'm going to assume [TS]

01:27:19   that this mentor that's that's one [TS]

01:27:20   candidate northeast shin yang tasty BBQ [TS]

01:27:23   you got mutton kidney he gonna need some [TS]

01:27:24   strings and got heart-shaped string [TS]

01:27:26   chicken skin string you got chicken [TS]

01:27:29   gizzards string you got prawn string you [TS]

01:27:32   have veggie string garlic string.h 25 [TS]

01:27:35   baked bread pieces i think that's bread [TS]

01:27:38   baked bread pieces but it's been pieced [TS]

01:27:41   it but I mean that's like bread isn't it [TS]

01:27:43   I don't know greatest thing since sliced [TS]

01:27:46   bread bacon mushroom roll [TS]

01:27:48   see now we're starting to sound good [TS]

01:27:50   except none of this sounds like any kind [TS]

01:27:52   of chinese whatever h15 croaker croak [TS]

01:27:55   Coker's h15 but that's not the one [TS]

01:27:58   that's a dollar net the dollar [TS]

01:27:59   ninety-eight broker is different from [TS]

01:28:01   boiled bullfrog always gather up the [TS]

01:28:02   menu now that no Trotter that house [TS]

01:28:05   trying to tell city Trotter a croaker [TS]

01:28:07   yeah okay broker is a quarter something [TS]

01:28:12   they put on your carpets already got it [TS]

01:28:13   figured this is the section called drink [TS]

01:28:16   beer and drink beer this sectional drink [TS]

01:28:18   beer wait a minute is it drink beer or [TS]

01:28:20   is it during the actuation all lowercase [TS]

01:28:21   drink beer so how would you pronounce it [TS]

01:28:23   you're just doing a kind of flat drink [TS]

01:28:25   beer drink beer I would say it's a total [TS]

01:28:26   language that's true drink beer [TS]

01:28:28   I 28 master iced tea I 30 master Sydney [TS]

01:28:31   candy do not have that guy doing demo [TS]

01:28:35   your Public Library [TS]

01:28:37   master master master city candy is [TS]

01:28:42   absolutely the most expensive dom top [TS]

01:28:46   entire Northwest 1500 always pretty from [TS]

01:28:51   both sides coming and going [TS]

01:28:53   coconut palm curd is under drink beer [TS]

01:28:56   you can get coconut palm Kurt honey [TS]

01:28:58   jasmine tea [TS]

01:28:58   fuck you that jasmine tea it says it [TS]

01:29:00   right Gail sure why did we read this far [TS]

01:29:02   down menu [TS]

01:29:03   you should we should go back there with [TS]

01:29:04   our 40-ounce flask and whack that guy [TS]

01:29:06   right in the head [TS]

01:29:07   freshly baked your human skin off you [TS]

01:29:09   UFO freshly watermelon juice freshly [TS]

01:29:13   watermelon juice coconut palm cord [TS]

01:29:14   courtesy phone Kurt hawthorne [TS]

01:29:17   sugar-coated Hawes yeah I want driving [TS]

01:29:20   acid droplets meat fried beans acid [TS]

01:29:25   droplets meat fried beans if I was still [TS]

01:29:27   in college yeah yeah all-you-can-eat go [TS]

01:29:30   down to the beach me to stand on stand [TS]

01:29:33   on top of some like stomping oil fire [TS]

01:29:35   soup oil fire like something off the [TS]

01:29:40   coast of Santa Barbara one imagines [TS]

01:29:42   maybe that's a fracking related dish oil [TS]

01:29:44   oil fires 8th house Trotter I feel like [TS]

01:29:48   a lot of these dishes are going to make [TS]

01:29:50   me have a bad time two hours later when [TS]

01:29:53   I have to pee [TS]

01:29:54   maje sought a goat that's Hawaiian this [TS]

01:29:59   seems like a lot of different kinds of [TS]

01:30:01   food having this one restaurant [TS]

01:30:02   especially with two waiters that don't [TS]

01:30:04   appear to have ever seen another living [TS]

01:30:07   person g9 griddle smelly gene I little [TS]

01:30:15   smelly fish g9 is actually my that's [TS]

01:30:21   that's actually my rating as a federal [TS]

01:30:22   employee [TS]

01:30:24   oh god I don't feel good I don't think [TS]

01:30:27   I'm right [TS]

01:30:28   air drying dried beef air-drying dried [TS]

01:30:32   beef air-drying dry griddle Australian [TS]

01:30:34   beef grilled Australian smelly griddle [TS]

01:30:37   Australia because little spicy lamb [TS]

01:30:40   belly griddle smelly spicy cauliflower [TS]

01:30:43   Trey smelly call it works so many levels [TS]

01:30:49   yeah from now on put the word smelly in [TS]

01:30:52   front of every fortune cookie in bed [TS]

01:30:55   thank you so much to our three sponsors [TS]

01:30:57   this week I want to thank braintree you [TS]

01:30:59   can find out more about braintree by [TS]

01:31:01   going to braintree payments calm / [TS]

01:31:03   supertrain Thank You braintree for your [TS]

01:31:05   fast payments lockbox and thank you too [TS]

01:31:07   I to Casper for their wonderful [TS]

01:31:08   mattresses John's got to the mattresses [TS]

01:31:10   you make another one [TS]

01:31:11   Thank You Casper for uh for taking me [TS]

01:31:14   away from my penicillin best Casper [TS]

01:31:16   becomes super trick and finally to are [TS]

01:31:20   very old very dear friends not that old [TS]

01:31:22   but dear friends at the squarespace you [TS]

01:31:24   learn more about them at squarespace.com [TS]

01:31:25   with an offer code supertrain aah chak [TS]

01:31:29   Squarespace please don't send me anymore [TS]

01:31:31   PDF spare space like in this house [TS]

01:31:34   Trotter we should get out of this [TS]

01:31:36   wheelhouse traveling to go by I want you [TS]

01:31:38   to go buy me that 40-ounce flask which [TS]

01:31:40   I'm going to fill with acetone yeah and [TS]

01:31:42   then we should go get that smelly house [TS]

01:31:44   Trotter that's gonna that's really going [TS]

01:31:49   to cut some of the msg you are the color [TS]

01:31:53   of a tomato I don't feel right but i [TS]

01:31:55   absolutely and I food does not bother me [TS]

01:31:58   know sometimes fried chicken makes me [TS]

01:31:59   sleepy [TS]

01:32:00   I could feel my forehead it's about an [TS]

01:32:02   eighth of an inch away from my head [TS]

01:32:04   right now I see you're never had like [TS]

01:32:05   right out here and it's both both num [TS]

01:32:08   and sensitive i feel like that is I feel [TS]

01:32:10   like it's a third I think I have a face [TS]

01:32:12   flu [TS]

01:32:12   yeah well a top face flu oh I'll cost [TS]

01:32:15   you a little extra if I feel a little [TS]

01:32:18   bit [TS]

01:32:19   fine yeah because I'm good at processing [TS]

01:32:22   all kinds of pollutants [TS]

01:32:25   yeah you are really your flight I'll be [TS]

01:32:28   fine I'll be fine i I'll be fine you're [TS]

01:32:31   willin ya little smelly fish [TS]

01:32:34   yeah okay little smelly fish marinated [TS]

01:32:38   fountain good isn't grill smelly fish [TS]

01:32:41   something is not a song by phoebe is it [TS]

01:32:44   is that as like a kill rock stars kind [TS]

01:32:46   of think yeah songs by phoebe how she go [TS]

01:32:49   um sautéed pigs intestines f-14 I want [TS]

01:32:53   to thank you to I want to thank you for [TS]

01:32:55   giving me your special blend [TS]

01:32:57   yeah I want to thank you for the fizzy [TS]

01:32:58   water yes I want to thank you for Alexa [TS]

01:33:01   thank merlin Wow not even it's not even [TS]

01:33:07   sound Alexa who is Merlin Mann Merlin [TS]

01:33:12   man 3 wrote the blog 43 folders while [TS]

01:33:17   jesus fucking christ that's it that's it [TS]

01:33:20   that's the whole thing Merlin d man [TS]

01:33:21   wrote flee wrote I thought she said [TS]

01:33:24   Merlin detail 03 / Lindy Man 3 the third [TS]

01:33:28   wrote wrote the blog 43 folds can [TS]

01:33:31   everybody [TS]

01:33:32   wow you're so much what you are and what [TS]

01:33:37   you're in runs that you're being that's [TS]

01:33:38   not going to really try [TS]

01:33:39   yeah okay everyone thank you so much and [TS]

01:33:43   thank you for enjoying this special [TS]

01:33:44   episode starts crawling on the floor for [TS]

01:33:47   paying extra sure my for being extra for [TS]

01:33:50   this special deluxe the holiday episode [TS]

01:33:53   again feel like removing my mic and I'm [TS]

01:33:58   walking through Merlin's forest of old [TS]

01:34:00   hard drives to give you this final bell [TS]

01:34:07   the good bell house Trotter [TS]