Roderick on the Line

Ep. 168: "The Room of Stories"


00:00:00   this episode of Roderick online is [TS]

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00:00:27   [Music] [TS]

00:00:32   hello hi John hi Marilyn [TS]

00:00:35   how's it going good I there was a storm [TS]

00:00:42   up here in Washington and I left my [TS]

00:00:47   office windows open a crack and the [TS]

00:00:52   storm opened them up all the way and [TS]

00:00:58   fill the room with storm [TS]

00:01:00   oh no they appreciate perimeter yeah so [TS]

00:01:04   everything is covered with a fine layer [TS]

00:01:07   of ash and amazingly like the ceiling is [TS]

00:01:14   suddenly peeling I don't know how it got [TS]

00:01:17   up to the ceiling [TS]

00:01:18   sure this isn't a dream ahead and the [TS]

00:01:21   curtains were all askew and it was very [TS]

00:01:24   exciting to because I saw when I pulled [TS]

00:01:26   up I saw that the windows were all the [TS]

00:01:29   way open and I was like who's been in my [TS]

00:01:32   office opening the windows and then I [TS]

00:01:33   came in and I was like oh the storm was [TS]

00:01:36   in my office and non rainstorms a [TS]

00:01:38   windstorm yeah we get those in the [TS]

00:01:41   northwest quite quite a bit and when the [TS]

00:01:43   seasons change we get a big windstorm [TS]

00:01:45   and so it they are accompanied by rain [TS]

00:01:49   often and and this one was but but my [TS]

00:01:51   sense is that it's mostly wind that got [TS]

00:01:55   in here and and did its dirty business [TS]

00:01:59   oh my gosh that's ash from all the fires [TS]

00:02:01   huh who knows where the where the lip [TS]

00:02:04   the thin coating of greasy ash came from [TS]

00:02:07   but yeah so like living it up on its [TS]

00:02:10   like something so like living in a bomb [TS]

00:02:15   travis has resin dude yeah except [TS]

00:02:18   there's no like there's no water bug [TS]

00:02:20   where's the carb where's the car where [TS]

00:02:23   is the car John I told you the story [TS]

00:02:25   right about the friend of mine from [TS]

00:02:27   Florida that that woke up and took a big [TS]

00:02:29   hit off his bong and then realize that [TS]

00:02:31   then a a water bug had been hanging out [TS]

00:02:35   of his bond was now in his mouth [TS]

00:02:37   oh one of those flying Florida [TS]

00:02:40   cockroaches this is [TS]

00:02:41   size of a tennis shoe but imagine you [TS]

00:02:44   just like our little wake and bake [TS]

00:02:47   oh no do it was alive when a hole dude [TS]

00:02:52   it was so live we so hard from living in [TS]

00:02:56   a ball you that must have harsh mellow [TS]

00:02:58   dude he was just chillin in his bong an [TS]

00:03:01   office and he's like oh no wow oh my god [TS]

00:03:07   totally in your mouth could be on [TS]

00:03:11   oh do you need to do any kind of I don't [TS]

00:03:14   know like regulation damage control with [TS]

00:03:17   you what you just scrape it off your [TS]

00:03:19   stuff but either so I cleared a little [TS]

00:03:21   area right here for my elbow anywhere [TS]

00:03:26   you want a blazer right now [TS]

00:03:27   no I'm not today you know in fact I've [TS]

00:03:29   already have already encountered one [TS]

00:03:31   person today who made a comment my good [TS]

00:03:34   friend Jason Finn saw me and he said so [TS]

00:03:39   I you've just let yourself go to shit [TS]

00:03:43   now you don't you're not even wearing a [TS]

00:03:45   button button up shirt 20 supporter [TS]

00:03:47   always a supporter to t know blazer no [TS]

00:03:49   no tie [TS]

00:03:50   now you're just in a t-shirt and jeans [TS]

00:03:53   and I was like you know what fuck it [TS]

00:03:55   seasons changing before I got nobody to [TS]

00:03:57   impress anymore i took a shower today [TS]

00:03:59   the only reason I took a shower is that [TS]

00:04:01   my family including my darling daughter [TS]

00:04:04   had started to comment that Daddy smell [TS]

00:04:07   funny [TS]

00:04:08   oh because i had just let myself just go [TS]

00:04:11   to hell over the weekend and I was like [TS]

00:04:14   all right fine I'll take a shower [TS]

00:04:16   I'm not above it uh-huh but I'm not [TS]

00:04:17   gonna put I'm not you know more and [TS]

00:04:19   white socks today i'm not i'm not [TS]

00:04:21   dressing up for anybody anymore [TS]

00:04:23   well it's not labor day yet true that's [TS]

00:04:26   right you can still wear white socks [TS]

00:04:27   Johnny said only I feel like there's you [TS]

00:04:30   got Memorial Day and Labor Day and those [TS]

00:04:32   sort of book and the it's okay to wear [TS]

00:04:34   in formal clothes and white shoes are [TS]

00:04:36   there other days in the year to change [TS]

00:04:38   which are allowed to wear em good point [TS]

00:04:41   our good question i think that there are [TS]

00:04:43   there's a limited number of time number [TS]

00:04:45   number number of weeks in the year that [TS]

00:04:47   you can wear any item of clothing that [TS]

00:04:50   has a wreath or a reindeer on it [TS]

00:04:53   right so you have you start doing that [TS]

00:04:56   before I mean personally I feel like [TS]

00:04:58   thanksgiving is is the day before which [TS]

00:05:02   you should not wear or have anything to [TS]

00:05:05   do with the reindeer it's gonna seem [TS]

00:05:06   like the washer broke [TS]

00:05:08   yeah right exactly if it it's a lot [TS]

00:05:10   that's a laundry date I peril [TS]

00:05:12   I feel like if it's before thanksgiving [TS]

00:05:15   and a reindeer comes up to you on the [TS]

00:05:17   street and tells you that his fan belt [TS]

00:05:19   broke and his wife and daughter are [TS]

00:05:21   waiting in the car around the block and [TS]

00:05:22   all he needs is five dollars you tell [TS]

00:05:23   him to fuck off before before [TS]

00:05:25   Thanksgiving after thanksgiving you go [TS]

00:05:27   yeah okay I'll up i'll buy white part of [TS]

00:05:31   the holiday spirit [TS]

00:05:33   yeah the reindeer out so that's that's [TS]

00:05:35   one thing [TS]

00:05:37   definitely I feel like you know I'm [TS]

00:05:42   saying about this the other day in my [TS]

00:05:44   mind's eye on sep tember first of the [TS]

00:05:49   year and i don't mean the calendar i [TS]

00:05:50   mean the year as the year occupies [TS]

00:05:52   physical space the year takes a right [TS]

00:05:55   turn a 90-degree right turn September [TS]

00:05:59   first and the implication of that right [TS]

00:06:03   turn in my mind's eye is that the year [TS]

00:06:06   is square and that every four months it [TS]

00:06:12   takes another right turn [TS]

00:06:13   but that is not actually how the year is [TS]

00:06:17   built the rectangular year [TS]

00:06:19   well no I mean for oh I'm sorry every [TS]

00:06:23   three years every three years it would [TS]

00:06:25   take a right turn [TS]

00:06:26   I'm sorry every three months what am I [TS]

00:06:28   talking about every three months [TS]

00:06:29   you are so high right now that's pretty [TS]

00:06:32   high the timer october november december [TS]

00:06:35   so it's the last third of the year it's [TS]

00:06:38   like you turn the corner on a triangle [TS]

00:06:40   that right well so but here's the [TS]

00:06:43   problem [TS]

00:06:43   there's definitely a right-angle turn [TS]

00:06:46   September from August August your head [TS]

00:06:49   along in an east-west direction and then [TS]

00:06:52   September first you take a right hand [TS]

00:06:55   turn 90 degree turn and now you are [TS]

00:06:58   headed in my mind's eye [TS]

00:07:00   you're headed south into fall [TS]

00:07:05   and then you get in you're headed south [TS]

00:07:08   into fall and and you know and maybe a [TS]

00:07:10   little bit downhill but then sort of [TS]

00:07:12   after thanksgiving you start to go [TS]

00:07:14   uphill and then christmas is there and [TS]

00:07:18   then at New Year's you definitely take [TS]

00:07:20   another 90 degree right hand turn now [TS]

00:07:23   headed west into the new year right but [TS]

00:07:29   then somewhere in january-february you [TS]

00:07:35   start to edge to the right you're not [TS]

00:07:39   taking a right hand turn but you heading [TS]

00:07:41   right you're you're veering right into [TS]

00:07:44   march april and that's kind of a rounded [TS]

00:07:48   turn where you're headed [TS]

00:07:51   you know you're headed north again but [TS]

00:07:53   in a little bit of a you know it's a [TS]

00:07:55   little bumpy the ride but definitely [TS]

00:07:57   bye-bye may you're headed north [TS]

00:08:02   you're heading in a northerly direction [TS]

00:08:04   and then in June there's a kind of an [TS]

00:08:10   it's not a it's not a gradual turn it's [TS]

00:08:12   an angled turn it can and i cannot to [TS]

00:08:15   stern like an obtuse turn nice easy turn [TS]

00:08:19   they're definitely headed north at this [TS]

00:08:21   point but you're headed in a kind of at [TS]

00:08:23   an angle so that when you get to july [TS]

00:08:26   again you have to you have to like comp [TS]

00:08:30   the rest of that turn if you're going to [TS]

00:08:33   make it to that if you're going to make [TS]

00:08:35   it back to sep tember so july and august [TS]

00:08:38   are headed [TS]

00:08:39   I think kind of in a I mean that through [TS]

00:08:42   a series of minor turns they have to end [TS]

00:08:45   up headed back east but it's very funny [TS]

00:08:49   that the spring and summer is a series [TS]

00:08:51   of gradual angled turns whereas spall [TS]

00:08:55   and winter are are defined by these two [TS]

00:08:58   right angle turn I should have been [TS]

00:09:02   drawing this instead of just strictly [TS]

00:09:04   listening [TS]

00:09:05   yeah its contents maybe they could draw [TS]

00:09:07   that up for us and I feel like somewhere [TS]

00:09:09   in the shape of the year the shape of [TS]

00:09:12   the year and feeling februari March [TS]

00:09:13   there might actually be turns that are [TS]

00:09:16   kind of back to the west a little bit [TS]

00:09:18   like [TS]

00:09:18   it's not it's not clear that it's always [TS]

00:09:20   rounding back to september's some of [TS]

00:09:23   that some of those weeks like right [TS]

00:09:26   around him especially around it leap [TS]

00:09:27   year you know you're going uphill and to [TS]

00:09:31   the west babies that a third dimension [TS]

00:09:35   you know before your like before you [TS]

00:09:36   level off and head start headed down [TS]

00:09:39   into the North back into spring so there [TS]

00:09:44   are several days in there where I feel [TS]

00:09:47   like costume changes are maybe not [TS]

00:09:50   mandatory but but certainly new things [TS]

00:09:54   come into play because I'm wearing a [TS]

00:09:56   tweed hat today and I feel like it looks [TS]

00:10:00   good on you [TS]

00:10:01   I feel like that is pushing it for for [TS]

00:10:03   august 31st it seemed more like i like i [TS]

00:10:06   like i like fall headgear [TS]

00:10:08   yeah I feel like I feel like a tweed hat [TS]

00:10:10   is is it you shouldn't even wear it in [TS]

00:10:13   September I feel like it's an october [TS]

00:10:14   november december thing yep [TS]

00:10:17   yeah but then in by December you should [TS]

00:10:20   be he should be transitioning into a [TS]

00:10:22   kind of a fur hat or a knit hat over and [TS]

00:10:27   then in the spring [TS]

00:10:28   you're going back you gradually as time [TS]

00:10:32   goes on from from knit caps to kind of [TS]

00:10:34   you know 22 whimsical hats like an era [TS]

00:10:40   the head type thing [TS]

00:10:42   well no I mean I do have a baseball app [TS]

00:10:44   that has moved moose antlers all I want [TS]

00:10:47   this so much when I was in like seventh [TS]

00:10:48   grade and that's when I got it and i've [TS]

00:10:50   been wearing it ever since [TS]

00:10:51   but you know like you that's when you [TS]

00:10:53   start to wear your chapeau your various [TS]

00:10:56   Shippo your newsboy cap and your and [TS]

00:10:59   your you know your felt fedora type pats [TS]

00:11:04   something jaunty in the spring [TS]

00:11:06   whoo-hoo and then in that and then in [TS]

00:11:08   late spring you can bring a bust out the [TS]

00:11:10   baseball hats and all that stuff is it's [TS]

00:11:14   really seasoned to taste i know this is [TS]

00:11:16   not on the list for John's next project [TS]

00:11:21   which we should talk about at some point [TS]

00:11:22   by down I IC IC possibly a little thin [TS]

00:11:27   volume the John fashion all aspects of [TS]

00:11:31   fashion not sure [TS]

00:11:32   men's clothes but fashion as as the as [TS]

00:11:35   the elephant in the cultural room [TS]

00:11:37   mmm fashion vs STYLE&FASHION reverses [TS]

00:11:40   preference [TS]

00:11:40   yes all kinds of those little shades I I [TS]

00:11:44   went to I went to the junkyard today I [TS]

00:11:47   had a very busy gay i woke up this [TS]

00:11:50   morning I put the baby in the bath then [TS]

00:11:53   I made her some bagels and then I put on [TS]

00:11:58   an airplane to Paris don't want to the [TS]

00:12:01   law [TS]

00:12:02   Oh blah here's how you say as a [TS]

00:12:05   thank-you merci [TS]

00:12:06   you can say merci bien or merci beaucoup [TS]

00:12:09   depending on you know how funny you want [TS]

00:12:13   to sound then i left the airport I went [TS]

00:12:16   immediately to the junkyard [TS]

00:12:17   I spent an hour at the junkyard and I [TS]

00:12:20   and I honestly felt like you know I [TS]

00:12:23   could just have I could just do a TV [TS]

00:12:25   show of just me wandering around a [TS]

00:12:26   junkyard because there's so much to talk [TS]

00:12:28   about i think we people watch that [TS]

00:12:31   there's so much I don't give your [TS]

00:12:34   remarks about the things that are in the [TS]

00:12:35   junkyard or just you think about life [TS]

00:12:37   well the thing is if you can walk around [TS]

00:12:39   a junkyard and not think about life i'll [TS]

00:12:40   put in with you [TS]

00:12:42   this episode of Roderick on the line is [TS]

00:12:46   brought to you in part by Squarespace [TS]

00:12:48   you can learn more about Squarespace [TS]

00:12:50   right now by pointing your web browser [TS]

00:12:51   at squarespace.com as many of you know [TS]

00:12:54   I've been a huge fan and evangelists a [TS]

00:12:56   square space for many years now it's not [TS]

00:12:59   only the place that I use for hosting [TS]

00:13:00   many of my own sites and yes my own [TS]

00:13:03   podcasts it's also the first place i [TS]

00:13:05   recommend for anyone wanting to do the [TS]

00:13:07   same [TS]

00:13:08   Squarespace sites are professionally [TS]

00:13:09   designed masterpieces they look great [TS]

00:13:11   right out of the box regardless of your [TS]

00:13:13   skill level there's zero coding notary [TS]

00:13:15   required and they offer intuitive and [TS]

00:13:17   easy-to-use tools to take all the pain [TS]

00:13:19   out of getting your stuff up [TS]

00:13:21   Squarespace has state-of-the-art [TS]

00:13:22   technology powering your site that [TS]

00:13:24   ensure security and stability even if [TS]

00:13:27   you get a link from Roderick on the line [TS]

00:13:29   Squarespace is trusted by millions of [TS]

00:13:30   people and some of the most respected [TS]

00:13:32   brands in the world the nutty part is [TS]

00:13:35   that Squarespace plans start at a very [TS]

00:13:37   affordable eight dollars per month and [TS]

00:13:39   that price even includes a free domain [TS]

00:13:41   name if you sign up for a year which you [TS]

00:13:43   should totally do please check square [TS]

00:13:45   spaced out and tell your friends about [TS]

00:13:46   it you can start your free trial site [TS]

00:13:48   today with no credit card required by [TS]

00:13:51   visiting squarespace.com and when you're [TS]

00:13:53   ready to buy make sure to use that very [TS]

00:13:55   special offer code supertrain and you [TS]

00:13:57   will get ten percent off your first [TS]

00:13:59   purchase our thanks to squarespace for [TS]

00:14:02   supporting rod on the line and all the [TS]

00:14:04   great shows [TS]

00:14:05   Squarespace build it beautiful I feel [TS]

00:14:07   like I definitely not as you're [TS]

00:14:10   surrounded by it [TS]

00:14:11   yes that's right it's like somebody dies [TS]

00:14:13   or something you're going to think about [TS]

00:14:14   life [TS]

00:14:15   alright you know if you it so you can [TS]

00:14:17   comment [TS]

00:14:18   are you coming all day on the stuff [TS]

00:14:20   that's in a junkyard but your cars are [TS]

00:14:23   very personal very personal for people [TS]

00:14:25   and he always all I I forget how [TS]

00:14:27   personal it is for people [TS]

00:14:29   hmm i dunno i have to tell my daughter [TS]

00:14:31   like when you know you know kids they [TS]

00:14:32   walk around walk real slow and touch [TS]

00:14:34   everything and reminders like don't [TS]

00:14:36   touch somebody's cars telling me about [TS]

00:14:38   her day she's walking along and then she [TS]

00:14:39   starts she starts kind of like handling [TS]

00:14:42   the logo on the car and like he can't do [TS]

00:14:44   that like somebody in some places that [TS]

00:14:46   some see it's easy like handling their [TS]

00:14:47   Mercedes logo you do not want to get [TS]

00:14:50   that person that you don't you do not [TS]

00:14:51   want to provoke somebody thats right [TS]

00:14:53   dont even even if you're walking along [TS]

00:14:55   absent-mindedly just drawing one finger [TS]

00:14:57   along the side of a car somebody's going [TS]

00:14:58   to be mad about it [TS]

00:14:59   yep so why around a junkyard you're [TS]

00:15:02   looking at you know there's 10,000 [TS]

00:15:04   stories in The Naked City and every one [TS]

00:15:06   of them ends up in a junkyard but also [TS]

00:15:09   it's not to think about that a lot with [TS]

00:15:11   the corner its everytime everytime i see [TS]

00:15:14   a bad tattoo i am actually say it's mike [TS]

00:15:18   as you see that you see that someday a [TS]

00:15:19   corner is going to have to kind of draw [TS]

00:15:21   that notebook yeah it's likely that [TS]

00:15:24   person is going to be dead and they're [TS]

00:15:26   gonna have to draw that tattoo for the [TS]

00:15:27   record [TS]

00:15:28   yeah the last or describe it the most [TS]

00:15:31   person that's going to see it and really [TS]

00:15:32   appreciate it is the is the is the guy [TS]

00:15:34   at the crematorium that's a that's [TS]

00:15:37   making like eighteen dollars an hour [TS]

00:15:38   apparently at our German Blackwater [TS]

00:15:43   gothic how I got a problem original [TS]

00:15:46   certain [TS]

00:15:48   rock chalk I'm sure that they just have [TS]

00:15:53   I'm sure they have just uh a picture [TS]

00:15:55   book of tattoos and you just circle the [TS]

00:15:57   one just like I owe symbol for Shanti on [TS]

00:16:01   the back of her neck circle kanji symbol [TS]

00:16:04   for regret looks like winnie-the-pooh [TS]

00:16:06   flying a yin-yang kite circle so anyway [TS]

00:16:11   you're isn't your internet actually a [TS]

00:16:13   junkyard is the story of [TS]

00:16:14   twentieth-century industrialism write it [TS]

00:16:17   so that means either their cars there [TS]

00:16:20   that I mean you don't see a lot of cars [TS]

00:16:21   from the thirties anymore in a junkyard [TS]

00:16:23   but you definitely see them from the [TS]

00:16:25   forties and fifties if you're lucky and [TS]

00:16:27   then all their full of cars from the [TS]

00:16:30   seventies and eighties and and just then [TS]

00:16:34   on all the stories that are good but [TS]

00:16:36   then then your mind starts to wander and [TS]

00:16:39   you're thinking about Oh life and times [TS]

00:16:43   and the wars and you know and Hermann [TS]

00:16:48   Goering and then pretty soon you're [TS]

00:16:52   thinking about dim sum and it's getting [TS]

00:16:56   late in the day and what is a what do [TS]

00:16:58   you have to do how how do you have to [TS]

00:17:00   get out of here on the way out of the [TS]

00:17:01   junkyard [TS]

00:17:02   I'm talking to the guy behind the [TS]

00:17:04   counter who calls he's calling me boss [TS]

00:17:05   he calls me Bobby nice which is really [TS]

00:17:08   nice i like boss I feel like getting [TS]

00:17:11   called boss by the guide the junkyard is [TS]

00:17:12   exactly right and he's got he's not [TS]

00:17:15   suffering fools heat because first of [TS]

00:17:17   all he sees the guy working at the jack [TS]

00:17:20   currencies more fools per capita than [TS]

00:17:23   anybody it aside from like a reporter [TS]

00:17:26   for entertainment tonight at the VMAs [TS]

00:17:29   right they're going to see a lot of [TS]

00:17:31   fools but the guide the junkyard sees a [TS]

00:17:33   different kind of fool i'm talking to [TS]

00:17:36   him and I and I and he looks over my [TS]

00:17:38   shoulder at somebody coming through the [TS]

00:17:40   front door and he says hey buddy hey you [TS]

00:17:45   know what you got [TS]

00:17:47   you put that back don't just leave it [TS]

00:17:49   and so I turn around and the guide [TS]

00:17:52   walked in the door and somehow something [TS]

00:17:54   had something in the door jamb had [TS]

00:17:56   fallen down [TS]

00:17:59   the pneumatic door closer and the guy [TS]

00:18:02   had water guy walked in and he's wearing [TS]

00:18:04   a baseball hat that's camouflaging it [TS]

00:18:07   has a deer on it and he just seemed seen [TS]

00:18:12   it and the guy behind the counter and [TS]

00:18:13   seen him see it and he just kept going [TS]

00:18:15   and so these discipline name that the [TS]

00:18:17   counterman is disciplining the guys like [TS]

00:18:19   you got it you know like fix that you [TS]

00:18:21   don't just walk in and leave it so the [TS]

00:18:23   guy goes back and he starts to try to [TS]

00:18:25   fix it fix the door and I'm in the [TS]

00:18:30   middle of asking the counterman question [TS]

00:18:32   so I I figure okay the guys fixing the [TS]

00:18:36   door now [TS]

00:18:36   now I now it's my turn so I say so [TS]

00:18:39   anyway is it possible that but the [TS]

00:18:43   counterman isn't paying attention to me [TS]

00:18:45   anymore he's focused on the door and he [TS]

00:18:48   says to the guy [TS]

00:18:49   hey hey pal you're making it more more [TS]

00:18:52   complicated than it needs to be [TS]

00:18:53   you just gotta and at that point a [TS]

00:18:58   second guy walking in the door stops and [TS]

00:19:01   starts helping the camouflage baseball [TS]

00:19:03   hat guy fix the door jamb but i can see [TS]

00:19:06   that the two of them together have now [TS]

00:19:08   made it a hundred times worse now the [TS]

00:19:11   entire top of the door is loose and and [TS]

00:19:16   the junkyard guy he's not going to go [TS]

00:19:18   out and get himself on principle on [TS]

00:19:20   principle he's not going to so so then [TS]

00:19:23   he says so then he's getting and i'm [TS]

00:19:25   looking at the junkyard guy and I'm [TS]

00:19:27   thinking okay my job right now is [TS]

00:19:33   graceful exit because I've already asked [TS]

00:19:36   I've already started to ask the [TS]

00:19:37   counterman my final question twice and [TS]

00:19:41   two times I haven't made it all the way [TS]

00:19:44   at the end of the question and now the [TS]

00:19:46   door is falling apart and I just want [TS]

00:19:50   out of here but I can't get out of here [TS]

00:19:52   because these guys are I've got the door [TS]

00:19:54   blocked and it's like literally now that [TS]

00:19:57   it's falling down around them so I can't [TS]

00:20:00   leave but I'm not going to stand here [TS]

00:20:02   and repeat my question a third time and [TS]

00:20:06   I'm not going to i'm not going to put [TS]

00:20:08   myself over to the side [TS]

00:20:10   and wait in a in kuwait line for the for [TS]

00:20:17   the attention to go back to me because [TS]

00:20:19   when it finally does there's gonna be [TS]

00:20:21   six guys in the room and they're all [TS]

00:20:23   going to turn me and go now what was [TS]

00:20:24   your fucking question [TS]

00:20:26   and my question is does not rate that [TS]

00:20:30   amount of attention right i'm at the [TS]

00:20:32   junkyard there guys here that are [TS]

00:20:34   rebuilding four-barrel carburetors [TS]

00:20:36   that's not what I'm doing now i just [TS]

00:20:39   went out and so I start to make my way [TS]

00:20:42   to the door at which point the [TS]

00:20:44   camouflage baseball hat time and his at [TS]

00:20:48   this and completely unrelated dude who's [TS]

00:20:51   in like a camel jacket the entire top of [TS]

00:20:56   the door frame false starts with all its [TS]

00:20:58   just falls completely I don't know how [TS]

00:21:00   they did it and the counterman is like [TS]

00:21:03   oh my you know it's like you guys come [TS]

00:21:06   on [TS]

00:21:07   and at a certain moment the one the [TS]

00:21:10   camouflage baseball hat guy is holding [TS]

00:21:12   up the holding up one side of the frame [TS]

00:21:14   and kind of leaning back and looking at [TS]

00:21:17   it with his head and the other guys on [TS]

00:21:19   the other side of the door holding up [TS]

00:21:21   the frame and they make a perfect like a [TS]

00:21:26   like a like a perfect Moorish arch one [TS]

00:21:30   hand up here the guys at back is arched [TS]

00:21:34   the other guys back is arched the the [TS]

00:21:36   door is falling down and I just make for [TS]

00:21:39   the gap and I as I'm as I leave I turn [TS]

00:21:43   and I I pointed the counterman and I say [TS]

00:21:46   I'll catch you later and proved right [TS]

00:21:50   through and right as i make as red as I [TS]

00:21:53   make it through the gap it's like the [TS]

00:21:55   Millennium Falcon going out of the [TS]

00:21:58   leaving the worms mouth in the asteroid [TS]

00:22:01   who heard a hold or just completely [TS]

00:22:05   comes apart and these guys are juggling [TS]

00:22:08   parts and they're bumping into each [TS]

00:22:09   other and it's just the catastrophe and [TS]

00:22:12   I just barely made it out and that for [TS]

00:22:17   all I know there's the half a dozen guys [TS]

00:22:19   still stuck in that auto parts store [TS]

00:22:21   because nobody knows nobody knows how to [TS]

00:22:23   leave [TS]

00:22:23   you got the last chopper out of Saigon [TS]

00:22:24   you know what I fucking did and I'm [TS]

00:22:29   grateful you know I'm grateful and part [TS]

00:22:31   of that is I surveyed the situation I [TS]

00:22:33   knew going in whatever the conversation [TS]

00:22:37   I was going to have that counter guy [TS]

00:22:38   could at any moment be interrupted by [TS]

00:22:40   somebody who needed it was like a [TS]

00:22:43   serious wrench turning guy who had a [TS]

00:22:46   serious question [TS]

00:22:47   I didn't foresee that the portal would [TS]

00:22:51   be closing so fast huh [TS]

00:22:53   so this day has had a lot of adventure [TS]

00:22:56   already and then I went to do the dim [TS]

00:22:57   summits play on so i pretty much [TS]

00:23:01   everything I know about junkyards comes [TS]

00:23:03   from like a scene in slacker [TS]

00:23:04   I I used to think a junkyard was like a [TS]

00:23:08   dump [TS]

00:23:08   I thought the place was kid I thought oh [TS]

00:23:10   junkyard that's a place we take an old [TS]

00:23:12   car is dead and it goes and lives there [TS]

00:23:15   and it's like it's like because I gotta [TS]

00:23:16   be heaven right but slacker help me [TS]

00:23:18   understand that there's a reason for [TS]

00:23:19   junk cars which is you go there and you [TS]

00:23:22   get parts from your model car in the [TS]

00:23:25   junkyard to put in your own car is that [TS]

00:23:27   how junkyard works is that correct that [TS]

00:23:29   is one of the things that you can do a [TS]

00:23:31   junkyard yes that's a very good idea [TS]

00:23:33   it's a great idea and back in the old [TS]

00:23:35   days when cars were things that normal [TS]

00:23:40   people could work on and they had you [TS]

00:23:44   know more or less interchangeable parts [TS]

00:23:47   a lot of them like if you had a Chevy as [TS]

00:23:50   my mom would say my mom is teaching my [TS]

00:23:52   daughter to say Chevy now that's how you [TS]

00:23:54   gotta stop that instead well I can't I [TS]

00:23:57   mean it's parties very strong-willed [TS]

00:23:58   John it's part of our vernacular and I [TS]

00:24:01   don't she doesn't it's not like she's [TS]

00:24:02   it's not like she's correcting a her 1c [TS]

00:24:06   when she says chevy it's just that my [TS]

00:24:08   mom pronounces it should be [TS]

00:24:10   I've never heard that chevy's I never [TS]

00:24:13   heard shitty Senate doesn't know hi [TS]

00:24:15   thing must be some it's a western Ohio [TS]

00:24:19   thing and so she say so like my kid has [TS]

00:24:24   started to because she likes to call out [TS]

00:24:26   all the different kinds of cars you see [TS]

00:24:28   and identify cars [TS]

00:24:30   she knows every kind of car she knows [TS]

00:24:33   every kind of nut [TS]

00:24:34   and she knows every kind of car and he's [TS]

00:24:39   back name every kind enough and so she [TS]

00:24:41   she was driving down the street and one [TS]

00:24:44   of the games you like supply as you know [TS]

00:24:47   nissan toyota ford ford shivvy and I'm [TS]

00:24:54   like shit EP oh my god I've been hearing [TS]

00:24:57   that my whole life and now my kid is [TS]

00:24:59   saying it should be but it used to be [TS]

00:25:03   you could go to the junkyard if you had [TS]

00:25:04   a Chevy you knew that you just did find [TS]

00:25:08   a whole bunch of shit he's in the [TS]

00:25:09   junkyard and you'd find the shitty part [TS]

00:25:10   that you needed and it will bolt right [TS]

00:25:12   on to your car and now of course cars [TS]

00:25:17   are just they're made by 3d printers [TS]

00:25:20   they're basically computers with wheels [TS]

00:25:22   yeah they're just they're all injection [TS]

00:25:24   molded and none of them you know they're [TS]

00:25:28   not really like fixable in the same way [TS]

00:25:30   but there are enough people that I mean [TS]

00:25:34   when I was the hour-and-a-half i spent [TS]

00:25:37   walking around the rainy junkyard [TS]

00:25:40   looking for the particular part i was [TS]

00:25:41   looking for [TS]

00:25:42   there were a dozen other people out [TS]

00:25:44   there and you know you bring your own [TS]

00:25:46   tools to the junkyard is really huh [TS]

00:25:48   and so a bunch of people walking around [TS]

00:25:50   with their toolkits and they're they're [TS]

00:25:54   taking the trim off of the door of the [TS]

00:25:56   off the passenger side door of a ford [TS]

00:25:59   aerostar or they're you know they're [TS]

00:26:02   they're trying to figure out how to [TS]

00:26:04   dismantle the air-conditioning hoses [TS]

00:26:08   from a from a caprice classic and people [TS]

00:26:13   still enough people doing that kind of [TS]

00:26:15   work that there's that there's still [TS]

00:26:18   cause for other a lot fewer junkyards [TS]

00:26:20   and there were I think I mean I used to [TS]

00:26:23   spend a lot of time in them when I was [TS]

00:26:24   young because I i was trying to [TS]

00:26:26   customize my car [TS]

00:26:29   whatever [TS]

00:26:31   maybe if you own the land it's gonna be [TS]

00:26:33   a pretty good deal it's like a parking [TS]

00:26:34   lot right i mean like your he is not [TS]

00:26:37   going to cost you that much to have it [TS]

00:26:39   right and over time somebody will [TS]

00:26:41   eventually get the the manifold cover [TS]

00:26:43   case of that shitty exactly and then [TS]

00:26:45   when the car has been completely [TS]

00:26:46   stripped then you crush it and sell it [TS]

00:26:50   for the scrap metal value so when you [TS]

00:26:53   see those semi trucks driving down the [TS]

00:26:55   road with with the 25 squished cars on [TS]

00:26:58   the better huh [TS]

00:26:59   they're going from a junkyard to a metal [TS]

00:27:01   yard and then circle of life [TS]

00:27:05   that's right circle of life that's right [TS]

00:27:07   so wandering around i am what i was [TS]

00:27:10   looking for a specific part but as I but [TS]

00:27:12   I got I got caught up in the loop in the [TS]

00:27:14   lives of some of these cars where was [TS]

00:27:17   just like oh that that car could talk I [TS]

00:27:19   mean that car can talk because you all [TS]

00:27:22   you have to do is look at it and it's [TS]

00:27:23   telling you so much about itself and [TS]

00:27:26   what it's seen the miles its travels [TS]

00:27:28   literally and figuratively [TS]

00:27:33   so it was it made me want to do is go [TS]

00:27:35   back to the junkyard [TS]

00:27:36   I haven't been to one in a long time i [TS]

00:27:39   was looking for a specific part but [TS]

00:27:40   really i don't i don't want it i don't [TS]

00:27:44   want to need any one part i want to go [TS]

00:27:46   there and find the part I didn't know I [TS]

00:27:49   needed [TS]

00:27:50   mm you know mmm such as a candle thing [TS]

00:27:53   you're you're on a building from mine [TS]

00:27:56   except you're not young right it's like [TS]

00:27:58   a young man's journey that's right you [TS]

00:28:01   don't you may not know what your what [TS]

00:28:02   your grill cup is but you want the one [TS]

00:28:03   that carpenter would use that's exactly [TS]

00:28:06   it you want to find a comment you want [TS]

00:28:08   to find a carpenter skup you walk around [TS]

00:28:10   that mean the first thing you have to do [TS]

00:28:13   is have faith that he step into the [TS]

00:28:17   abyss and that that they're they're not [TS]

00:28:20   going to fall [TS]

00:28:21   who but i mean i know i know a lot about [TS]

00:28:25   one of the things about a junkyard is [TS]

00:28:27   for it to be useful for you at all [TS]

00:28:30   you have to have a pretty good knowledge [TS]

00:28:33   of what I'm what all cars look like such [TS]

00:28:38   that you can see them in there [TS]

00:28:41   completely dismantled state [TS]

00:28:44   wrecked and picked over and still be [TS]

00:28:48   able to tell what kind it is right [TS]

00:28:51   because if you're in there looking for [TS]

00:28:52   apart from a Nissan say yeah yeah it's [TS]

00:28:55   don't make model year anything you gotta [TS]

00:28:57   be able to look across a field strewn [TS]

00:28:59   with junk cars where all the doors have [TS]

00:29:02   been taken off and the hoods are up and [TS]

00:29:04   the the glasses are broken and the roofs [TS]

00:29:08   are crushed and you have to be able to [TS]

00:29:10   teach you know use your encyclopedia of [TS]

00:29:13   of cues to say like because I for [TS]

00:29:18   instance i'm i'm looking for a Chevy [TS]

00:29:20   truck chevy truck from a certain era GMC [TS]

00:29:23   truck from certain era where a lot of [TS]

00:29:26   trucks in a junkyard but if you don't [TS]

00:29:30   know the difference between a Ford and [TS]

00:29:31   Chevy you spend all afternoon walking [TS]

00:29:35   all the way over to afford to I was [TS]

00:29:39   going to try and look for the logo will [TS]

00:29:41   goes long gone [TS]

00:29:42   can't break that truck that truck rolled [TS]

00:29:45   off rolled off the pacific coast highway [TS]

00:29:46   and down a hill and sat in the you know [TS]

00:29:50   set in the tide pool for four years and [TS]

00:29:52   got towed out you better be able to tell [TS]

00:29:54   that's a Ford well let's let's let's say [TS]

00:29:57   the obvious it is probably not too cool [TS]

00:29:59   to be using your iphone a lot at the [TS]

00:30:01   junkyard [TS]

00:30:02   well you know he doesn't like a little [TS]

00:30:05   bit like a tingling if you're certainly [TS]

00:30:07   if you're like what is this car [TS]

00:30:10   yeah and and and also one of the rules [TS]

00:30:12   of the junkyard is when what a body [TS]

00:30:14   meets a body coming through the Rye who [TS]

00:30:16   you don't really acknowledge the other [TS]

00:30:20   person catching the shitty exactly [TS]

00:30:24   because you are you are fucking [TS]

00:30:27   scavengers prefer in a boneyard [TS]

00:30:31   oh I see it's certainly a men's room if [TS]

00:30:34   you keep your own counsel [TS]

00:30:36   yeah you're not like PayPal my man there [TS]

00:30:38   to make friends yeah what are you [TS]

00:30:39   looking for like no this carpet checker [TS]

00:30:43   Imperial exactly [TS]

00:30:45   no you don't ask to borrow somebody's [TS]

00:30:47   tools you don't even this is one of the [TS]

00:30:50   few areas where where a where people are [TS]

00:30:53   going about their business such that you [TS]

00:30:54   don't even nod and may [TS]

00:30:56   i contact if you see if you come upon [TS]

00:30:58   somebody out there it's it is it's [TS]

00:31:01   already it's basically already two steps [TS]

00:31:04   toward the apocalypse so so your first [TS]

00:31:09   concern is to meet somebody in one of [TS]

00:31:12   those places you have to assume that [TS]

00:31:13   they want your water it's not become [TS]

00:31:17   addicted to water that's right but did [TS]

00:31:23   not have predicted the water but maybe [TS]

00:31:26   week [TS]

00:31:27   mmhmm yeah once again this episode of [TS]

00:31:33   Roderick on the line is brought to you [TS]

00:31:34   in part by braintree code for easy [TS]

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00:32:57   payments and for supporting Roderick on [TS]

00:33:00   the loss just a quick side note i should [TS]

00:33:01   write this down [TS]

00:33:03   I know you got a lot of projects in your [TS]

00:33:04   player and another one would be just put [TS]

00:33:07   out the fucking rule book for all the [TS]

00:33:08   stuff that a lot of people don't know [TS]

00:33:09   out you could do it and anonymously [TS]

00:33:11   maybe more like some kind of a book like [TS]

00:33:13   you don't even miss the rules were not [TS]

00:33:15   even allowed to talk about and I'm sure [TS]

00:33:17   to tell you I didn't even know junkyard [TS]

00:33:19   head rules like that [TS]

00:33:20   oh yeah you could you could save me so [TS]

00:33:21   much indignity somebody from Vice [TS]

00:33:24   magazine Romy not very long ago and they [TS]

00:33:26   said would you write a book about her [TS]

00:33:28   write an article at least in her right [TS]

00:33:30   there [TS]

00:33:31   well that's why they're asking me would [TS]

00:33:35   you write up an article about all the [TS]

00:33:37   rules that people should know before [TS]

00:33:40   they act like citizen journalists [TS]

00:33:42   videotaping police brutality or whatever [TS]

00:33:46   yeah because i had made some comments [TS]

00:33:49   over the years to the effect of to the [TS]

00:33:52   fact that people that such a such a [TS]

00:33:55   volume needs to be widely disseminated [TS]

00:33:57   because people's citizen journalism is [TS]

00:34:01   being somewhat hamstrung by the fact [TS]

00:34:02   that they don't understand [TS]

00:34:04   portrait mode know and they don't [TS]

00:34:08   understand not to say fuck stock fuck [TS]

00:34:14   that these are good rules while they are [TS]

00:34:16   feeling video tapings John you do not [TS]

00:34:18   know how much intestinal fortitude it [TS]

00:34:20   takes for me every day to not walk up to [TS]

00:34:23   people grab their hand and turn it 90 [TS]

00:34:26   degrees but you have you a different [TS]

00:34:30   shape TV than i do you know that's gonna [TS]

00:34:32   look like you know what that's gonna do [TS]

00:34:33   you have any idea what does i know [TS]

00:34:34   people are taller than wide generally [TS]

00:34:36   but just doing a favorite hold it [TS]

00:34:38   sideways [TS]

00:34:39   yeah it's a basic rule I mean that one [TS]

00:34:41   that one that city in China exploded [TS]

00:34:44   there was some amazing footage of it [TS]

00:34:49   once again taken in standup camera mode [TS]

00:34:53   and and you're like oh my god this is [TS]

00:34:57   like the this is an incredible moment [TS]

00:35:00   you are watching an entire city explode [TS]

00:35:05   and no one has taught you how to hold it [TS]

00:35:08   free kick [TS]

00:35:08   yeah yeah it's also incredibly dorky to [TS]

00:35:12   watch [TS]

00:35:13   we just want is painful to watch because [TS]

00:35:14   you're going like Oh [TS]

00:35:16   it's almost like their thumbs over part [TS]

00:35:17   of the lens yeah so and the and the the [TS]

00:35:20   person from vice was very nice and and [TS]

00:35:22   actually like seemed like a really kind [TS]

00:35:24   of smart editor guy and was like hey you [TS]

00:35:27   know you want to write this or do you [TS]

00:35:28   want to collaborate on i was like i do [TS]

00:35:31   want to collaborate on it with you i [TS]

00:35:33   think that would be really that would be [TS]

00:35:34   really useful it would be good for [TS]

00:35:35   people we should collaborate on a guide [TS]

00:35:40   a citizen's guide to to you know to be a [TS]

00:35:46   amateur journalists [TS]

00:35:48   oh and so how especially especially with [TS]

00:35:50   the camera because I i can think of like [TS]

00:35:52   about by half a dozen things I wish [TS]

00:35:53   everybody knew about using the camera on [TS]

00:35:56   their phone that can make so much of a [TS]

00:35:58   difference [TS]

00:35:58   well the other thing is like don't pinch [TS]

00:36:01   zoom in now and don't ever first of all [TS]

00:36:05   move on that I think the very first [TS]

00:36:07   thing almost everybody needs to know is [TS]

00:36:10   like you see this in like when the first [TS]

00:36:12   time dad gets a camera in the eighties [TS]

00:36:14   it's like do not do a bunch of like we [TS]

00:36:17   don't like vine don't do all these like [TS]

00:36:20   three second shots don't know don't [TS]

00:36:22   short shots [TS]

00:36:22   don't move the camera keep the camera in [TS]

00:36:24   one place you think you need to move [TS]

00:36:26   your eyes don't move the camera [TS]

00:36:28   yeah yeah but turn the camera on put it [TS]

00:36:31   sideways and then walk as close to the [TS]

00:36:34   action as you can stay quiet and like if [TS]

00:36:40   you're gonna move if you're going to if [TS]

00:36:42   you if you need to move to get to get a [TS]

00:36:43   better view of it slow movements but not [TS]

00:36:47   with the you know move your body not the [TS]

00:36:49   not the don't wiggle the camera there's [TS]

00:36:52   so many things to say and an exciting [TS]

00:36:55   slide all that i would you also going to [TS]

00:36:56   the stuff like like know your rights [TS]

00:36:57   type stuff will absolutely have to talk [TS]

00:36:59   about that stuff but at and all of that [TS]

00:37:01   is part and parcel of saying like what [TS]

00:37:04   is interesting that even that's another [TS]

00:37:07   thing that a citizen journalist needs to [TS]

00:37:09   think about what is interesting about [TS]

00:37:12   this and because so often you see if you [TS]

00:37:16   see it some footage where the action [TS]

00:37:21   that they think is interesting is [TS]

00:37:23   completed and they they stopped filming [TS]

00:37:25   but that wasn't the end of what's [TS]

00:37:28   interesting about [TS]

00:37:29   that's her that wasn't you know that [TS]

00:37:31   wasn't actually the end of the scene [TS]

00:37:32   that brings I could be instantiated a [TS]

00:37:35   vent or the action is just one part of [TS]

00:37:37   it and especially in police cases what [TS]

00:37:39   happens next could be even more [TS]

00:37:40   important exactly internet like what [TS]

00:37:42   happens with the actual story if you're [TS]

00:37:44   watching a confrontation and then [TS]

00:37:45   somebody gets shot the end is not the [TS]

00:37:49   person got shot the end is like what [TS]

00:37:52   happens in the next 10 minutes that's [TS]

00:37:54   the whole case so all that and so that [TS]

00:37:57   the person from vice was awesome sent me [TS]

00:38:00   a long email with their thoughts and [TS]

00:38:03   their construction of it and and what [TS]

00:38:06   what you know how they imagine it and [TS]

00:38:08   then I just completely just drop the [TS]

00:38:10   ball and didn't didn't reply which I [TS]

00:38:15   feel terrible about and I should maybe [TS]

00:38:17   go find that and and dig that up because [TS]

00:38:18   i have so much to say on the topic but [TS]

00:38:22   also have this show about the junkyard [TS]

00:38:24   that i'm working on when there's a lot [TS]

00:38:27   to do ever so many rules i mean the [TS]

00:38:30   volumes if it would just be what it [TS]

00:38:33   could be kind of like the 33 and a third [TS]

00:38:34   series of little books I was always [TS]

00:38:37   thinking something similar yes it's [TS]

00:38:38   bigger than a pamphlet but that the [TS]

00:38:40   shorter than a novel [TS]

00:38:41   yeah we're that it's just a series of [TS]

00:38:42   series of rulebooks how to behave at the [TS]

00:38:46   junkyard how to behave backstage at a [TS]

00:38:49   concert where you are not actually a [TS]

00:38:52   friend of anybody in the band but [TS]

00:38:54   somehow got backstage all you know I I [TS]

00:38:58   gotta tell ya I I think something like [TS]

00:39:00   this could be super-strong I think of a [TS]

00:39:01   book i mention this before but it's a [TS]

00:39:03   book that I adored in in college because [TS]

00:39:06   you know I'm an almanac i am a book of [TS]

00:39:08   lists Kyle of these books of of trivia [TS]

00:39:10   and rules of thumb and all those kinds [TS]

00:39:12   of things actually was wonderful series [TS]

00:39:14   of books called rules of thumb that were [TS]

00:39:15   just fantastic like you know you can [TS]

00:39:18   calculate how long you gonna wait in [TS]

00:39:19   line at the bank take the number of [TS]

00:39:20   people x 3.5 or whatever like how to [TS]

00:39:22   pick a line all that kind of stuff but [TS]

00:39:24   there's one called the modern man's [TS]

00:39:26   guide to life which is not quite as [TS]

00:39:27   Mookie as it sounds but it was full of [TS]

00:39:29   advice that people have written into [TS]

00:39:31   this guy about how to do different stuff [TS]

00:39:33   and none of them would achieve you know [TS]

00:39:36   would rise to the level of meeting a [TS]

00:39:38   chapter but they would be collected into [TS]

00:39:40   like you know the [TS]

00:39:42   different different kinds like you know [TS]

00:39:43   how to how to not look like a doofus in [TS]

00:39:45   a restaurant like I do all the stuff you [TS]

00:39:47   know how to how to basically fix your [TS]

00:39:48   car this kind of stuff I think something [TS]

00:39:50   like that John Waters guide to life [TS]

00:39:51   it's friendly feeling better title could [TS]

00:39:53   be extremely useful [TS]

00:39:55   thank you so much i'm gonna just start [TS]

00:39:57   writing it down right down the kinds of [TS]

00:39:58   things you want to collect and then [TS]

00:40:00   start uh you know gleaning the tips of [TS]

00:40:03   the tips late getting tips for my [TS]

00:40:07   podcast avoid saying things like [TS]

00:40:08   cleaning the tips how do you how do you [TS]

00:40:11   get a tow truck driver in Missouri to [TS]

00:40:13   let you ride in the cab [TS]

00:40:14   ok it could be better it was a visit [TS]

00:40:16   just extremely specific to you how do [TS]

00:40:19   you mean there's so much how to help [TS]

00:40:22   Gary remember that you've met yeah how [TS]

00:40:25   do you get if you if you are a Mayan [TS]

00:40:27   ruin and you want to go into the part [TS]

00:40:30   that's that's fenced-off who do you talk [TS]

00:40:33   to Tommy a lot of these things I mean [TS]

00:40:36   one of my favorites I can't do this but [TS]

00:40:38   i love that you can do this is is your [TS]

00:40:40   whole thing of like you know if you [TS]

00:40:41   wanna walk in somewhere walk in like you [TS]

00:40:43   own the place [TS]

00:40:44   yeah nobody nobody asked you just walk [TS]

00:40:46   right in no they're sooo me on the place [TS]

00:40:48   and then this also gives you lots of [TS]

00:40:50   opportunities to tell anecdotes right [TS]

00:40:53   well and you know what the thing of [TS]

00:40:55   course when you're young is that one of [TS]

00:40:57   the best anecdotes is getting thrown out [TS]

00:40:59   of a place when you get a little bit [TS]

00:41:02   older [TS]

00:41:03   it's it you know it's it's a lot harder [TS]

00:41:07   for me to get thrown out of a place now [TS]

00:41:08   because I kinda do look like I should [TS]

00:41:11   own the place and to get unceremoniously [TS]

00:41:15   booted out of a place that you look like [TS]

00:41:17   you should own it just you know I have [TS]

00:41:21   to dust off my hat because that you know [TS]

00:41:23   the guy throw out and throw your hat in [TS]

00:41:25   the street [TS]

00:41:27   yeah just optimization until you feel [TS]

00:41:28   your hand at I'd pick your pardon sir I [TS]

00:41:32   am as God made me sir [TS]

00:41:35   so I mean yeah you want to dim sum and [TS]

00:41:38   then we added we are our regular dim [TS]

00:41:40   summit where it was decided I was not [TS]

00:41:47   you and Jason Jason and I meet with two [TS]

00:41:51   other friends Cal McAllister who owns an [TS]

00:41:53   advertising agency called [TS]

00:41:55   the WAGs Lee school for girls uh-huh and [TS]

00:41:59   Matt Dresner who owns an advertising / [TS]

00:42:01   PR agency [TS]

00:42:03   oh man this is your extended marketing [TS]

00:42:05   team I've been hearing about this [TS]

00:42:07   because it's really you get all the [TS]

00:42:08   terrible ideas for stuff you should be [TS]

00:42:09   doing this is the team and the team's [TS]

00:42:11   decision today we're not meeting but its [TS]

00:42:13   people the decision of the team today [TS]

00:42:17   was like more of an old man and its [TS]

00:42:22   people here there is some kind of way I [TS]

00:42:25   might be able to promote my twitter feed [TS]

00:42:27   minutes here by advertising agency [TS]

00:42:30   friends and they're trying to they're [TS]

00:42:32   trying to expand my social media [TS]

00:42:34   recharge sure yeah but the decision was [TS]

00:42:37   listen we should just figure out how to [TS]

00:42:39   be multi millionaires and the and the [TS]

00:42:43   best anecdote was a cow [TS]

00:42:45   one of one of his close friends from [TS]

00:42:47   high school is the king of the yard pool [TS]

00:42:52   of the yard pool [TS]

00:42:55   yeah if you want to if you want a little [TS]

00:42:56   pond in your yard who he started out [TS]

00:43:03   this guy started outputting pawns in [TS]

00:43:05   people's yards like a lot of people like [TS]

00:43:08   a lot of pond guys start out all your [TS]

00:43:10   residential consumer ponds yeah you [TS]

00:43:13   start are probably working for a guy [TS]

00:43:14   that's installing ponds and then you you [TS]

00:43:16   build up a little nest egg and then you [TS]

00:43:18   start your own pond installation company [TS]

00:43:21   but this guy figured out was you know [TS]

00:43:26   when you want in the words of Mark Twain [TS]

00:43:28   when there's a gold rush he sell [TS]

00:43:30   pickaxes uh-huh right so he's out there [TS]

00:43:34   putting in ponds and he's looking up the [TS]

00:43:37   chain at the guy who's making the ponds [TS]

00:43:40   who's making huh [TS]

00:43:42   the pond equipment and he says this [TS]

00:43:45   guy's not this you know this guy's not [TS]

00:43:47   moving refrigerators he's not installing [TS]

00:43:49   color TVs that's all you do it that's [TS]

00:43:52   the way you do it he said by the counter [TS]

00:43:54   somewhere fulfilling pond parte orders [TS]

00:43:57   and so this friend of Calvin callisters [TS]

00:44:00   he systematize 'as the pond business [TS]

00:44:04   vertical integration [TS]

00:44:06   the phone so now he's not installing 500 [TS]

00:44:08   pounds in the summer he's selling 50,000 [TS]

00:44:11   blows 50,000 ponds all across America to [TS]

00:44:14   people all the part of people have to go [TS]

00:44:18   through any move up on food chain [TS]

00:44:20   that's right he became the BP camp on [TS]

00:44:22   man and so when I have a friend i have a [TS]

00:44:26   friend in seattle figure this out to we [TS]

00:44:28   legalized weed here [TS]

00:44:30   uh-huh and everybody was going to rest [TS]

00:44:33   everything all shit I better gotta be I [TS]

00:44:35   got a warehouse i gotta start growing [TS]

00:44:36   weed I gotta start selling weed I gotta [TS]

00:44:39   get in this weed business in on the [TS]

00:44:41   ground floor but I've got a pal who went [TS]

00:44:44   to China and figured out the weed [TS]

00:44:51   appliance the weed delivery appliance [TS]

00:44:56   that was going to be the industry [TS]

00:45:00   standard and then he cornered the market [TS]

00:45:04   on the weed delivery appliance so he [TS]

00:45:07   never has to touch a weed talking about [TS]

00:45:10   like 44 consumer to get into their [TS]

00:45:11   system [TS]

00:45:12   yeah i'm talking about a of the vaping [TS]

00:45:15   oh right gear right let's see that would [TS]

00:45:18   that the weed people are going to put [TS]

00:45:21   the weed into who never grow anything [TS]

00:45:24   that's right it's some kind of you know [TS]

00:45:26   it's some kind of like yeah yeah it's [TS]

00:45:28   like it looks like yeah that's where you [TS]

00:45:30   get the more intensified you're not like [TS]

00:45:32   really sucking on it like there's a [TS]

00:45:33   whole what I think there's a name for [TS]

00:45:34   this it's like vaping before we do they [TS]

00:45:36   call it [TS]

00:45:36   yeah I don't know some kind of Jabba the [TS]

00:45:38   Hutt technology you have seen people use [TS]

00:45:41   it on and I remember when they're [TS]

00:45:43   talking about what whether there should [TS]

00:45:44   be legal weed I gasps maybe the early [TS]

00:45:47   2000s there is one go-to woman they [TS]

00:45:49   would always interview in California and [TS]

00:45:51   if you imagine like last week we don't [TS]

00:45:53   call them go tues and we're gonna hit [TS]

00:45:55   from another time but you're like a big [TS]

00:45:57   bag new york times sunday New York Times [TS]

00:45:59   comes in [TS]

00:46:00   yeah she looked like she was doing [TS]

00:46:02   something with filling that bag with [TS]

00:46:03   smoke and then and it was really [TS]

00:46:05   disturbing to watch her use it but but [TS]

00:46:07   then you get you get big hit of the weed [TS]

00:46:08   yeah that might be you might be that [TS]

00:46:12   might be something else that might that [TS]

00:46:14   might be [TS]

00:46:15   you know we used to cut the bottom of a [TS]

00:46:16   milk carton and stick it in a sink full [TS]

00:46:18   of water [TS]

00:46:18   I is your time was that can make a bong [TS]

00:46:20   out anything or paste [TS]

00:46:22   well we need to be a hobby of ours you [TS]

00:46:24   keep iPod to pretty much anything and I [TS]

00:46:26   don't like things from mcdonalds the [TS]

00:46:28   children would get his toys [TS]

00:46:29   what the hell good is that skill now I [TS]

00:46:32   know I know tears and rain so this guy [TS]

00:46:33   goes in part of his strategy that is not [TS]

00:46:35   just doesn't want to be pushing we see [TS]

00:46:37   also he wants to go and get exclusive [TS]

00:46:39   deals with if I could say Chinese makers [TS]

00:46:41   of the wii delivery system [TS]

00:46:43   selena is that nobody else to get [TS]

00:46:45   exclusive deal [TS]

00:46:46   he's got he's got the Northwestern's got [TS]

00:46:48   the pnw district locked in [TS]

00:46:50   well yeah he's provided the technology [TS]

00:46:53   so all these guys that are like oh man i [TS]

00:46:55   sold a thousand weeds [TS]

00:46:57   yeah he's like I saw a hundred thousand [TS]

00:47:00   we'd pellets or weed weed you know [TS]

00:47:05   pressurized we've rods and I mean it's [TS]

00:47:11   money in the bank this guy and he never [TS]

00:47:13   touched you never have to touch a weed [TS]

00:47:14   although i think he likes it but I had a [TS]

00:47:17   friend in college [TS]

00:47:18   who's big idea was he was going to make [TS]

00:47:20   bombs out of two cans and like stuff [TS]

00:47:24   like out of a like a like a school can [TS]

00:47:26   so at the time we were all I don't know [TS]

00:47:29   about I don't know about y'all down down [TS]

00:47:31   and had the new college in Florida yeah [TS]

00:47:33   but up in the northwest we were all [TS]

00:47:36   chewing tobacco all the time didn't we [TS]

00:47:38   were different stuff there and so we all [TS]

00:47:40   had we all in Copenhagen cans in our [TS]

00:47:43   back pockets creating very appealing [TS]

00:47:46   rings in our genes and my friend he took [TS]

00:47:51   that you can and he made a he made a [TS]

00:47:54   hole-in-one side on the run the rim on [TS]

00:47:58   the edge right a hole and then 90 [TS]

00:48:02   degrees around the circle he made [TS]

00:48:04   another hole and then he had a stem with [TS]

00:48:09   a bowl that fit inside one of the holes [TS]

00:48:12   its appellate it's super good and then [TS]

00:48:15   if you filled the toucan one-third full [TS]

00:48:19   of water [TS]

00:48:20   God and then put the lid on it it was it [TS]

00:48:24   was it was watertight ok and then you [TS]

00:48:27   turn the king [TS]

00:48:28   and at an angle and put your mouth over [TS]

00:48:31   the one hole and the bowl was in the [TS]

00:48:34   other hole and it's a fully functional [TS]

00:48:36   ball if the pit and and he and he [TS]

00:48:40   honestly was like I'm gonna make I'm [TS]

00:48:42   gonna make a million dollars i'm gonna [TS]

00:48:44   summon them because then when the thing [TS]

00:48:46   is when you when you want to break it [TS]

00:48:49   down you just dump the water out take [TS]

00:48:51   the stem out stick it in the toucan and [TS]

00:48:54   stick that you can you too can circle in [TS]

00:48:57   your jeans you can second that your [TS]

00:48:59   chick gets them it should if he had [TS]

00:49:02   called the juke it's it would be a [TS]

00:49:05   billionaire and Sam come on this is just [TS]

00:49:10   sent you a link this idea has been [TS]

00:49:12   colonized what I just look at the tip [TS]

00:49:14   can bong [TS]

00:49:16   oh my god if I see a picture of my [TS]

00:49:18   friend i am going to lose my shit well [TS]

00:49:20   there's a lot of there's a lot there's a [TS]

00:49:22   lot of a lot of variance here still not [TS]

00:49:25   entirely sure why you would want to do [TS]

00:49:28   this but ah alright not sure why you [TS]

00:49:31   would want to do it because of being has [TS]

00:49:32   been that's American ingenuity at the [TS]

00:49:34   heart of its etsy for weed yet the bomb [TS]

00:49:37   is just the partners with you oh my god [TS]

00:49:38   you can't boring there's hundreds of [TS]

00:49:40   them to get so while that one look at [TS]

00:49:46   that handsome let's get runs USB well [TS]

00:49:48   this guy's gotta this guy's got some [TS]

00:49:50   kind of holster for it [TS]

00:49:51   yeah looks like he's got so i guess [TS]

00:49:53   because utility kilt oh well camouflaged [TS]

00:49:55   on so people won't be able to see it so [TS]

00:49:57   this is called oh it's called the AK [TS]

00:49:59   files i thought it was that meant the [TS]

00:50:01   Alaska files but then i click on it and [TS]

00:50:03   it's a it's a website for people who [TS]

00:50:06   have ak-47 oh I see here's one made out [TS]

00:50:09   of a heinz ketchup bottle [TS]

00:50:11   alright my goodness just strange images [TS]

00:50:14   John so this guy so he's a heavyset guy [TS]

00:50:16   he's blacked out his eyes he's cradling [TS]

00:50:20   an ak-47 he's wearing a stripy sort of [TS]

00:50:24   French or Russian commando shirt [TS]

00:50:27   uh-huh and I gotta see this he's got a [TS]

00:50:30   toucan hipster Jennings comes calling it [TS]

00:50:36   a towel AK files IC tactical tobacco [TS]

00:50:40   patch [TS]

00:50:40   oh IC thats I get it it's a bedside it's [TS]

00:50:44   got that it's got a non-call velcro [TS]

00:50:46   anymore it's got the clove hitch or [TS]

00:50:49   whatever it's called that little hook [TS]

00:50:51   and loop the loop tactical hook-and-loop [TS]

00:50:53   look at that is a lie [TS]

00:50:56   this led this is a richer subculture [TS]

00:50:57   then I realized I instinctively don't [TS]

00:50:59   like that guy just because [TS]

00:51:00   come on yeah yeah there's just there's [TS]

00:51:03   something at the level whatever it is [TS]

00:51:06   that a person enjoys there's always the [TS]

00:51:08   desire to complicated [TS]

00:51:09   mm it's like drinking games oh yeah yeah [TS]

00:51:13   but even like with drinking games where [TS]

00:51:14   it's like really like you kind of have a [TS]

00:51:16   game to drink [TS]

00:51:17   yeah you know in this case you gotta [TS]

00:51:18   have a good have a pouch for everything [TS]

00:51:20   some people love to be organized they [TS]

00:51:22   have people are bored yet you know you [TS]

00:51:24   know in all honesty I'm gonna tell you [TS]

00:51:25   I'm gonna tell you a little story [TS]

00:51:26   ok last night i was cleaning house [TS]

00:51:29   cleaning a room in my house that hadn't [TS]

00:51:31   been cleaned in a long time and I was [TS]

00:51:33   having some i was getting some help [TS]

00:51:35   getting some help cleaning the room [TS]

00:51:37   because I was not able to do it myself [TS]

00:51:39   because this was the room of stories [TS]

00:51:42   oh my goodness yeah and so the room of [TS]

00:51:48   stories it's very hard for me to clean [TS]

00:51:50   it i can clean other rooms in the house [TS]

00:51:51   but the room stories it's hard because [TS]

00:51:53   you have everything you pick up as a [TS]

00:51:55   very long story attached to it and I [TS]

00:51:58   don't want to throw it away because then [TS]

00:52:01   you throw the story away but anytime I [TS]

00:52:04   ask somebody to help me they end up [TS]

00:52:07   sitting on the floor while I tell them [TS]

00:52:08   stories about things and the room [TS]

00:52:11   doesn't get cleaned yeah and so I had a [TS]

00:52:13   I had a friend helping me clean the room [TS]

00:52:16   and she was very unsympathetic which is [TS]

00:52:21   what was needed [TS]

00:52:22   yeah but i had to say to her like listen [TS]

00:52:24   you have to be somewhat sympathetic [TS]

00:52:27   because you know these stories they they [TS]

00:52:32   all matter and at one point she picked [TS]

00:52:35   up a pouch which was a tactical velcro [TS]

00:52:39   hook and hook and bead pouch which I [TS]

00:52:46   actually got from you i was doing the [TS]

00:52:50   flying on it [TS]

00:52:51   nope it's a pouch that was designed to [TS]

00:52:56   go on the strap of a messenger bag right [TS]

00:52:59   so already it's it's like bike messenger [TS]

00:53:03   connected and it i believe it was for an [TS]

00:53:08   ipod or maybe an early iteration of a [TS]

00:53:12   phone [TS]

00:53:13   yeah it was i'm pretty sure I know what [TS]

00:53:14   it's for it was for you can put your [TS]

00:53:16   candy bar phone in this velcro holder [TS]

00:53:19   and it had the velcro wouldn't go around [TS]

00:53:22   you like your turn back to strap that's [TS]

00:53:24   right you can access access your phone [TS]

00:53:26   it was Timbuktu branded and she said [TS]

00:53:30   what does this does this does this fit [TS]

00:53:32   your phone and I was like no she's also [TS]

00:53:34   but that's gotta be good for something [TS]

00:53:36   she's well because that's exactly what i [TS]

00:53:37   said and she said doesn't fit any item [TS]

00:53:40   that you currently have and I said no no [TS]

00:53:42   but it's that that's not what matters [TS]

00:53:44   it's a bit of perfectly great little [TS]

00:53:46   pouch you could put matches in it at [TS]

00:53:48   udcc I've I could say and nothing I [TS]

00:53:51   don't not sure you're talking about here [TS]

00:53:52   but whoever that person is an [TS]

00:53:53   understanding that may have been [TS]

00:53:55   designed have a nokia phone in it but [TS]

00:53:57   that doesn't mean you gotta quit fucking [TS]

00:53:58   nokia phone and now there could be there [TS]

00:54:00   could be 1500 paper clips in there you [TS]

00:54:02   could put talking about the popcorn [TS]

00:54:05   popcorn in there [TS]

00:54:06   thank you could put popcorn in there [TS]

00:54:07   that is not a thing I thought the [TS]

00:54:09   popcorn hold but I could should have [TS]

00:54:10   said that you could put a bunch of short [TS]

00:54:13   pens are you can you can have a handbook [TS]

00:54:18   space but it's a handful of space but [TS]

00:54:20   right before conference you can have [TS]

00:54:23   space pens made that you give out to [TS]

00:54:24   people you see myself well I don't want [TS]

00:54:26   to dig in my bag everything i want to [TS]

00:54:27   give away a band I got emotional about i [TS]

00:54:29   have apart from everybody and even one [TS]

00:54:31   hand sanitizer in there you could fill [TS]

00:54:33   it with it you can fill it with a with [TS]

00:54:36   like a conditioner you can put coffee [TS]

00:54:41   beans in their members great so so I so [TS]

00:54:45   I'm fighting her on this Timbuktu strap [TS]

00:54:48   a tactical strap holder like you know a [TS]

00:54:52   toothpick candle holder and she said she [TS]

00:54:56   gave me this look the stern look the [TS]

00:54:58   unsympathetic look and she said [TS]

00:54:59   seriously gonna fight me over this thing [TS]

00:55:01   and I was like no and she said good and [TS]

00:55:08   she put it in the go to the thrift store [TS]

00:55:11   bag huh [TS]

00:55:13   and I was like okay I mean that is a [TS]

00:55:17   time sometime i agree but seriously that [TS]

00:55:19   is a perfectly good tactical pouch and [TS]

00:55:23   then the next thing she held up was a [TS]

00:55:25   piece of green string and it was a it's [TS]

00:55:32   a beautiful piece of green string that I [TS]

00:55:34   have been keeping around because I knew [TS]

00:55:37   it was a special piece of string and I [TS]

00:55:39   knew that it was going to be useful i [TS]

00:55:43   haven't yet figured out how it's going [TS]

00:55:44   to be useful but it was definitely going [TS]

00:55:46   to be useful and I realized that she was [TS]

00:55:49   holding it up that I had been carrying [TS]

00:55:50   it with me for 23 years and that every [TS]

00:55:54   time I pulled it out of something I was [TS]

00:55:55   like this is killer string it was about [TS]

00:55:58   one foot long and then and the thing is [TS]

00:56:04   it's just a piece of string so I would [TS]

00:56:05   move it whenever I would be cleaning out [TS]

00:56:07   earlier box i would just move the string [TS]

00:56:09   to the new box because it seemed crazy [TS]

00:56:11   to throw away this incredible one foot [TS]

00:56:14   length of string and she was likes and [TS]

00:56:18   again she came into like seriously this [TS]

00:56:20   yeah i mean before I even protested she [TS]

00:56:22   was like what is this even in both of [TS]

00:56:24   these cases also there's not particular [TS]

00:56:26   stories associated with these but but [TS]

00:56:28   there is to you obvious utility in these [TS]

00:56:30   magical potential potential utility [TS]

00:56:32   potential utility there was always going [TS]

00:56:34   to be a moment when I was like cut out [TS]

00:56:35   you know what I need one foot of really [TS]

00:56:38   awesome green string or six inches twice [TS]

00:56:40   or six inches twice of green string but [TS]

00:56:43   but string that has to be spent it has [TS]

00:56:45   big string that has a kind of special [TS]

00:56:47   some mad magnitude Trapattoni gift for a [TS]

00:56:52   mouse [TS]

00:56:53   well that is exactly one of the things [TS]

00:56:54   that I thought of but in any case she's [TS]

00:56:56   holding up the string and I I so I had [TS]

00:56:58   already acquiesced to the timbuk2 pouch [TS]

00:57:02   going in the thrift store thing but the [TS]

00:57:04   string was a bridge too far and i took [TS]

00:57:05   the string and I just hiding string [TS]

00:57:08   saving I tied it around my wrist wrapped [TS]

00:57:12   it around twice tied it with a job he [TS]

00:57:15   not [TS]

00:57:15   and I said look it is now it is [TS]

00:57:19   decorative and I'm not somebody who [TS]

00:57:21   wears a lot of adornment but now i have [TS]

00:57:25   so today i have this spectacular i think [TS]

00:57:29   green sort of rope risks a but it's like [TS]

00:57:36   a personal Kabbalah thing because [TS]

00:57:38   without men like Madonna bracelet [TS]

00:57:40   exactly well well isn't she the one who [TS]

00:57:43   made the Kabbalah bracelet popular for [TS]

00:57:45   you to everybody's wearing string this [TS]

00:57:46   is the problem the next thing that Jason [TS]

00:57:48   Finn says to me after he notices that [TS]

00:57:50   i'm wearing a t-shirt because he says [TS]

00:57:53   what's with the coldplay bracelet haha [TS]

00:57:56   oh my effing getting it from all sides [TS]

00:58:01   here I the string has been with me for [TS]

00:58:04   23 years and now i'm rocking it i think [TS]

00:58:07   pretty well I think it's like it's [TS]

00:58:10   pretty jazzy but the thing is you're [TS]

00:58:12   like somebody like think about all the [TS]

00:58:13   things you just in this visit of ours [TS]

00:58:15   alone talking about being able to tell [TS]

00:58:17   the stories and feel the past of the [TS]

00:58:19   cars right you think about the way that [TS]

00:58:22   those startups out there are pulling the [TS]

00:58:23   memories out of old men's clothes you [TS]

00:58:25   look at the string and you see a story [TS]

00:58:27   you like somebody named night Shyamalan [TS]

00:58:29   movie like you're seeing stuff that [TS]

00:58:30   other people can't see it's not because [TS]

00:58:32   you're hallucinating [TS]

00:58:32   it's because they did they don't have [TS]

00:58:34   the sensitivity to the vibrations that [TS]

00:58:36   you use the right you see what these [TS]

00:58:38   objects are putting out there and [TS]

00:58:39   they're just walking past going what [TS]

00:58:40   really string think you're like yeah [TS]

00:58:42   string they do not make string like this [TS]

00:58:44   anymore if you went out like if you went [TS]

00:58:47   to a store that said just if there was [TS]

00:58:48   called just strength is probably a store [TS]

00:58:50   in Portland [TS]

00:58:51   I bet you there isn't it well or it's [TS]

00:58:53   that's the type of straws string string [TS]

00:58:55   along particles positively string strung [TS]

00:58:59   out and they have artisanal stretch [TS]

00:59:03   yeah it's also the type of store that [TS]

00:59:06   would be on the Main Street about [TS]

00:59:08   otherwise failing town haha alright [TS]

00:59:11   alright like it like it would be inside [TS]

00:59:14   the inside the former Tandy radio shack [TS]

00:59:16   that be a place called like strings and [TS]

00:59:19   things and you go in there and it's [TS]

00:59:24   every kind of strength maybe the maybe [TS]

00:59:27   the gal and I'm [TS]

00:59:29   i'm pretty sure it's a gal who's running [TS]

00:59:31   strings and things in downtown full of [TS]

00:59:35   cats down everything is your batty the [TS]

00:59:37   stripping yeah i bet you if i went in [TS]

00:59:40   there with this string and said can you [TS]

00:59:42   duplicate this string she would first of [TS]

00:59:45   all she would take a moment and be like [TS]

00:59:48   she got a loop but that's a little [TS]

00:59:51   jewelers live ya should get out she'd be [TS]

00:59:53   like that's incredible i haven't seen [TS]

00:59:55   string like that since the eighties [TS]

00:59:56   replicating the string it is not [TS]

00:59:58   possible because she would go [TS]

00:59:58   possible because she would go [TS]

01:00:00   back in the back and she bring some [TS]

01:00:01   string out you're crashing sheep yeah [TS]

01:00:03   that's right she'll be back there for 20 [TS]

01:00:04   minutes should come out and she'd have a [TS]

01:00:06   really apologetic look on her face and [TS]

01:00:08   she'd say this is as close as I get but [TS]

01:00:11   it just wouldn't have the hefty just [TS]

01:00:12   three inches of light green jute yeah [TS]

01:00:15   exactly it wouldn't it wouldn't have the [TS]

01:00:16   it wouldn't have the waft or the the for [TS]

01:00:20   the Wolves mm and and we would both [TS]

01:00:23   agree [TS]

01:00:24   no in fact that isn't it and I would [TS]

01:00:28   walk out of there with the string that I [TS]

01:00:30   have the string that I came in with you [TS]

01:00:32   know what I mean [TS]

01:00:33   and I'd be like that's right my-my to [TS]

01:00:36   Mike my foot foot foot and it's [TS]

01:00:38   basically a foot 12 inches of great [TS]

01:00:40   strain and and no one can no one can [TS]

01:00:44   take it from so glad you saved it i did [TS]

01:00:47   get I did I did allow for a lot of [TS]

01:00:50   things to get thrown away Bell what [TS]

01:00:52   would you get money ask what were some [TS]

01:00:54   like you know pound-for-pound for some [TS]

01:00:56   relatively easy ones to let go of [TS]

01:00:57   everything we're like that [TS]

01:01:00   I'm glad somebody brought it up well [TS]

01:01:03   there are two two things stick out one [TS]

01:01:06   of them was about 15 years ago I took I [TS]

01:01:10   took a correspondence geology course and [TS]

01:01:14   i really enjoyed it and the way that you [TS]

01:01:18   either way that you did the course was [TS]

01:01:20   you you know you did your homework [TS]

01:01:21   mailed it into the professor and the [TS]

01:01:24   professor corrected it and mailed it [TS]

01:01:25   back to you kidding me [TS]

01:01:28   we said correspondence course about you [TS]

01:01:30   it really hit literally sent in the mail [TS]

01:01:32   that mailed it in an envelope to hide [TS]

01:01:35   was a long time ago and so I I carried [TS]

01:01:42   on this correspondence course and i [TS]

01:01:44   really enjoyed the studying and I [TS]

01:01:45   enjoyed the geology and I enjoyed the [TS]

01:01:47   homework but when and everything was [TS]

01:01:51   that that you would send the the the [TS]

01:01:54   homework in and also sending a [TS]

01:01:56   self-addressed stamped envelope [TS]

01:01:59   so the professor would send them the [TS]

01:02:01   homework back in an envelope which had [TS]

01:02:05   your handwriting on it [TS]

01:02:07   I remember the East always feel so weird [TS]

01:02:08   to get a letter in my own handwriting ya [TS]

01:02:12   self addressed stamped is when you can't [TS]

01:02:14   remember what it was for right even [TS]

01:02:17   weirder right when they're gone for a [TS]

01:02:19   long time and then you're like you just [TS]

01:02:20   get the self-addressed stamped envelope [TS]

01:02:21   thanks so much anymore but that used to [TS]

01:02:23   be a thing if you want free stuff it [TS]

01:02:24   tells me some stickers or get our [TS]

01:02:26   catalog or something like that or you [TS]

01:02:28   know and it must be so weird to get mail [TS]

01:02:30   and it was like a folded-up envelope [TS]

01:02:32   with your own handwriting on it was [TS]

01:02:33   super creepy [TS]

01:02:34   yep so I got all the homework [TS]

01:02:37   assignments back but I never opened the [TS]

01:02:40   envelopes and now now that I've said it [TS]

01:02:43   a couple of times i don't know whether [TS]

01:02:44   to pronounce that envelope envelope also [TS]

01:02:46   i'm gonna go with envelope from here on [TS]

01:02:48   out they were envelopes to begin with [TS]

01:02:50   but now their envelopes so but i but i [TS]

01:02:54   enjoyed the class so much that it wasn't [TS]

01:02:55   like I wanted to throw them away i just [TS]

01:02:57   didn't I didn't care what I didn't care [TS]

01:03:00   about the grade i didn't care about the [TS]

01:03:03   you know I just never opened them but i [TS]

01:03:05   kept them so i had 10 or 12 pretty thick [TS]

01:03:10   envelopes it in my own handwriting that [TS]

01:03:14   I knew had an entire class of geology in [TS]

01:03:18   it and I couldn't and now it was 15 [TS]

01:03:22   years old I couldn't bring myself to [TS]

01:03:24   throw it away and my unsentimental [TS]

01:03:28   friend was like again I mean she really [TS]

01:03:31   only needed one look which was seriously [TS]

01:03:34   see that it's sort of like not clean out [TS]

01:03:37   your couch all the way I don't want to [TS]

01:03:38   leave something oh please tell me you [TS]

01:03:41   open at least one of them so I so I was [TS]

01:03:43   like all right and the thing is my job [TS]

01:03:45   at the at this at this point in the [TS]

01:03:47   cleaning had become just sit in a chair [TS]

01:03:49   and things end up in my lap and I'm [TS]

01:03:51   telling the story of them and she's [TS]

01:03:53   ignoring me and and you know figuring [TS]

01:03:55   stuff out but so I opened up the first [TS]

01:03:57   one and here's this geology homework [TS]

01:04:00   from 15 years ago and there's red [TS]

01:04:05   teacher marks all over it from a teacher [TS]

01:04:09   that I had never met [TS]

01:04:12   saying great job really interesting read [TS]

01:04:17   you know really interesting uh idea or [TS]

01:04:21   whatever because I you know it was like [TS]

01:04:22   I was I was expanding on it wasn't just [TS]

01:04:26   like is this shifter what it was like I [TS]

01:04:28   was talking about a geological ideas and [TS]

01:04:33   so then I opened another one and hear [TS]

01:04:35   all these red marks from this teacher [TS]

01:04:37   where she's like John I really thought [TS]

01:04:39   that this was you know great job and [TS]

01:04:41   this is you know in here a couple more [TS]

01:04:42   things to think about and so then I'm [TS]

01:04:44   opening all the envelopes and I had been [TS]

01:04:47   having this whole conversation with this [TS]

01:04:50   teacher but I wasn't aware of it because [TS]

01:04:52   I never opened the envelopes and by the [TS]

01:04:53   end of the class she was writing all [TS]

01:04:56   these long red remarks like you know [TS]

01:04:59   what a pleasure having you in the class [TS]

01:05:00   you know this you didn't you know [TS]

01:05:02   exceptional work throughout and this is [TS]

01:05:04   clearly an a paper at every level and [TS]

01:05:06   and you know and at one point she was [TS]

01:05:09   like I'm from Alaska to and started on [TS]

01:05:11   my Kaiser never even knew never knew huh [TS]

01:05:16   and this has just been sort of sitting [TS]

01:05:18   there on my you know on it really [TS]

01:05:23   actually on top of a dresser in the room [TS]

01:05:26   of stories for all this time and you [TS]

01:05:32   know now i feel like i should look her [TS]

01:05:35   up [TS]

01:05:36   uh we had we had a really great [TS]

01:05:39   conversation going and I was [TS]

01:05:42   communicating exclusively in geology [TS]

01:05:46   homework but she was you know sending me [TS]

01:05:50   all this sort of flank personal chatty [TS]

01:05:53   professor stuff my goodness and it was [TS]

01:05:57   really it was pretty heavy and so I got [TS]

01:06:00   to the last assignment which was the [TS]

01:06:03   final paper which I barely remember [TS]

01:06:05   writing it's like a 15 page paper on the [TS]

01:06:11   island of Santorini and it's covered in [TS]

01:06:18   her remarks and I was like all right you [TS]

01:06:20   know what I can throw away all of these [TS]

01:06:23   you know all these worksheets and all of [TS]

01:06:29   these maps and all of this all of this [TS]

01:06:31   colored pencil stuff I can throw it all [TS]

01:06:34   away but i'm not going to be able to [TS]

01:06:36   throw away this final paper with all of [TS]

01:06:37   these personal remarks on it and so my [TS]

01:06:42   unsentimental friend had provided for me [TS]

01:06:44   by this time a multi pocket file folder [TS]

01:06:48   which the truly on on a colorable items [TS]

01:06:56   could could go in and be safely stored [TS]

01:06:58   and so it found it found its own slot in [TS]

01:07:03   the bag and feel good about that i think [TS]

01:07:09   i can live with it [TS]

01:07:10   I mean I feel like I you know like 12 [TS]

01:07:15   envelopes gone but the but the report [TS]

01:07:18   got saved and strength that let you have [TS]

01:07:22   that strength and the string got saved [TS]

01:07:24   now that the one the final thing that [TS]

01:07:26   I'm really torn about you have time for [TS]

01:07:30   this [TS]

01:07:31   yeah you have somewhere else to be in [TS]

01:07:34   fifth grade I liked downhill skiing [TS]

01:07:38   quite a bit and my dad liked to downhill [TS]

01:07:41   ski on the two of us were that we bonded [TS]

01:07:43   a lot over downhill skiing and in fifth [TS]

01:07:46   grade there was some sort of pottery [TS]

01:07:49   module that came through our class where [TS]

01:07:53   we were all making we were too old to [TS]

01:07:55   make handprints in a circle of clay we [TS]

01:07:59   were we were to the next level to make [TS]

01:08:01   pencil holders or something [TS]

01:08:03   do you remember making anything in the [TS]

01:08:05   pottery yeah I remember making ashtrays [TS]

01:08:07   master you can make a straight and later [TS]

01:08:08   on you make a pipe when you're in [TS]

01:08:09   college [TS]

01:08:10   exactly ok so i'm sure a lot of my [TS]

01:08:13   favorite it all comes back to marijuana [TS]

01:08:15   does it does it eventually you're going [TS]

01:08:18   to make a bomb but now it's funny I mean [TS]

01:08:19   like you there was a lot of funny how [TS]

01:08:21   much ashtray making there was when we [TS]

01:08:24   were kids [TS]

01:08:25   yeah just something with a Sunday school [TS]

01:08:26   or or regular school or whatever it was [TS]

01:08:29   you gotten past hand and footprints and [TS]

01:08:31   you may be worn up the pencil holder you [TS]

01:08:32   could at least make a rudimentary a [TS]

01:08:34   place for your mom dad put [TS]

01:08:36   instance yeah and and nobody in my [TS]

01:08:38   family smokes [TS]

01:08:40   by the time i was in fifth grade and so [TS]

01:08:41   I had no I had no astray to make and so [TS]

01:08:44   what I made was a little not little [TS]

01:08:48   actually it's about the size of a [TS]

01:08:49   paperback book and I wrote the word ski [TS]

01:08:54   in clay on a clay square and I painted [TS]

01:09:05   it and i fired it and I gave it to my [TS]

01:09:10   dad [TS]

01:09:10   huh and my dad put it up on the top of [TS]

01:09:14   his kitchen cupboard and it was there [TS]

01:09:18   and it moved with him and it went with [TS]

01:09:21   him all the way everywhere he went [TS]

01:09:24   and then when he died I inherited again [TS]

01:09:28   and I put it in the room of stories upon [TS]

01:09:34   on the top of the shelf and so I'm [TS]

01:09:38   cleaning the room stories and my [TS]

01:09:40   unsentimental friend picks this thing up [TS]

01:09:42   and without even batting an eye [TS]

01:09:47   cox her arm as though to throw it [TS]

01:09:52   she's not even looking at me for [TS]

01:09:53   approval she cocked her arm to throw [TS]

01:09:55   this thing in the thrift store bag and I [TS]

01:10:02   was like wait a minute and I tell her [TS]

01:10:06   the story and she's just rolling her [TS]

01:10:09   eyes and she says what good is it was [TS]

01:10:14   like it never occurred to me it's not [TS]

01:10:19   good for anything and she was like is it [TS]

01:10:22   beautiful and I looked at it for the [TS]

01:10:25   first time I had never really seen it [TS]

01:10:28   before this moment and I realized that [TS]

01:10:32   it was a piece of shit that I had and I [TS]

01:10:36   was embarrassed that in fifth grade I [TS]

01:10:39   mean in fifth grade there are children [TS]

01:10:40   who can play the cello there are [TS]

01:10:44   children who have played the cello for [TS]

01:10:46   the President of the United States of [TS]

01:10:47   America [TS]

01:10:48   yeah in fifth grade spelling bee winners [TS]

01:10:53   jugglers kids that have survived famines [TS]

01:11:00   and i made this little shite thing [TS]

01:11:03   that's not even an ashtray [TS]

01:11:05   it's just a nothing it's just a shite I [TS]

01:11:10   it's not even square [TS]

01:11:12   I didn't even I didn't I wasn't even [TS]

01:11:14   careful enough to square the edges [TS]

01:11:16   it's like it's just a piece of shit and [TS]

01:11:23   i was astonished to discover that this [TS]

01:11:26   thing that had been with me my whole [TS]

01:11:28   life it always peered down at me from [TS]

01:11:30   some top shelf somewhere was just a hunk [TS]

01:11:34   of garbage if if it went into the thrift [TS]

01:11:36   store bag it would go through the thrift [TS]

01:11:37   store and a good price that was at one [TS]

01:11:40   cent and it would sit there on the shelf [TS]

01:11:44   until somebody knocked it off and broke [TS]

01:11:45   no one would mourn it [TS]

01:11:47   uh-huh and yet I could not allow it to [TS]

01:11:53   go and now what what does that say [TS]

01:11:57   Marlon I i know that's I don't say that [TS]

01:12:04   that's super-complicated and there's a [TS]

01:12:06   lot of angles to that one and the ending [TS]

01:12:09   you shovel on me with the ending that [TS]

01:12:11   was quite a twist again because it [TS]

01:12:12   sounds like as you look at it it had [TS]

01:12:15   accumulated the value of being something [TS]

01:12:17   your father hadn't hung onto through his [TS]

01:12:19   life but as you look at it you didn't [TS]

01:12:20   feel like it was anything super special [TS]

01:12:23   i mean he he put it up on top of the [TS]

01:12:28   Shelf because his son made it and but he [TS]

01:12:32   couldn't possibly have been proud [TS]

01:12:34   because the first time he saw it he must [TS]

01:12:38   have looked at it and said oh shit now i [TS]

01:12:41   have to carry this with me it's not [TS]

01:12:45   useful [TS]

01:12:46   it's not decorative it right just it's [TS]

01:12:49   just shit it's just a piece of garbage [TS]

01:12:53   yeah I don't over complicate this it was [TS]

01:12:55   gone [TS]

01:12:56   well no I so i put it so that was one of [TS]

01:12:59   the few things that got put into [TS]

01:13:02   so into the limbo state into the into [TS]

01:13:04   the between universes place which is [TS]

01:13:09   like balanced on the corner of a table [TS]

01:13:11   everyone who walks into the room has to [TS]

01:13:16   look around and say wow the room looks [TS]

01:13:18   great [TS]

01:13:19   you clean up the room story is amazing [TS]

01:13:20   and then their eyes will fall upon this [TS]

01:13:23   ski sign [TS]

01:13:25   alright well not exactly one thought on [TS]

01:13:28   this this is not to try as much because [TS]

01:13:31   i want to share this story but this is [TS]

01:13:33   not to persuade you to keep it because [TS]

01:13:34   it sounds like you probably don't need [TS]

01:13:35   to maybe take a photo of it and that [TS]

01:13:37   would be enough [TS]

01:13:38   that's something that's what i did with [TS]

01:13:39   a lot of my stuff that I had trouble [TS]

01:13:41   getting rid of during one of our big [TS]

01:13:42   purchase with photograph anything i [TS]

01:13:43   wanted to keep the memory of but i have [TS]

01:13:47   to say excuse me that one aspect of this [TS]

01:13:50   is complicated is that the fact that [TS]

01:13:52   it's fucked up an ugly and old and [TS]

01:13:54   stupid becomes part of the charm to me [TS]

01:13:57   and I you know you're little you know [TS]

01:14:01   and think just because you were shitty [TS]

01:14:03   at it doesn't make it not valuable on [TS]

01:14:05   its own and Ally mention this because [TS]

01:14:07   this one time when I was 10 [TS]

01:14:10   maybe probably four or five it's [TS]

01:14:12   whatever i was still playing with [TS]

01:14:13   play-doh and would have had a disney [TS]

01:14:15   related Plato set and I made the world's [TS]

01:14:18   shittiest snow white out of a single [TS]

01:14:21   piece of red play-doh for my grandmother [TS]

01:14:24   it was super ugly and super dumb but all [TS]

01:14:27   I mean it took me what who cares a [TS]

01:14:28   little kid I you know it just it was [TS]

01:14:30   just a dumb thing I made it I was at [TS]

01:14:32   their house i made this I gave it to her [TS]

01:14:34   she was thrilled with it and she put it [TS]

01:14:36   on the mantel right so this is probably [TS]

01:14:38   not making maybe nineteen seventy one or [TS]

01:14:40   two maybe she put it up there and she [TS]

01:14:42   kept it there and it and it got old and [TS]

01:14:45   stupid like Plato is not made to be kept [TS]

01:14:47   over a fireplace for many years and it [TS]

01:14:49   got kind of whitish and over the years [TS]

01:14:51   she had to insert needles in it to like [TS]

01:14:53   make it hold the head on and it was it [TS]

01:14:55   was just the most ugly and dreadful [TS]

01:14:57   crumbling thing you've ever seen in your [TS]

01:14:58   life [TS]

01:14:59   of course by the time she passed away in [TS]

01:15:00   1987 it was it was truly awful but you [TS]

01:15:03   know at that point it had been up there [TS]

01:15:05   for whatever 15 years and yeah we did we [TS]

01:15:09   threw it away but it was quite a moment [TS]

01:15:11   for me to realize my grandmother had [TS]

01:15:13   kept that [TS]

01:15:14   I was really young and as ugly and [TS]

01:15:16   stupid as broken as it was it still made [TS]

01:15:19   me remember her well but I didn't feel [TS]

01:15:20   like I needed to keep the broken snow [TS]

01:15:22   white but it was a nice memory for me so [TS]

01:15:24   you know I think you can let the ski [TS]

01:15:26   thing go let it go but you can still [TS]

01:15:27   appreciate just because you don't have [TS]

01:15:28   that in your hand anymore doesn't mean [TS]

01:15:30   that you don't appreciate your dad and [TS]

01:15:31   the fact that he kept because of you I [TS]

01:15:34   think that that's a perfectly sane kind [TS]

01:15:37   of sentimentality to have it doesn't [TS]

01:15:39   mean you have to keep every piece of [TS]

01:15:40   that could you let him in your heart [TS]

01:15:41   even if you don't have ski on your shelf [TS]

01:15:44   yeah yeah my you know my dad didn't have [TS]

01:15:50   very good taste either he might actually [TS]

01:15:52   thought it was good [TS]

01:15:56   so many twists [TS]