Roderick on the Line

BONUS: "Roderick on the Line" Live at Verdi Club, SF


00:00:00   this very special bonus episode of [TS]

00:00:01   Roderick online is sponsored by cards [TS]

00:00:03   against humanity they asked us not to [TS]

00:00:05   read an ad so hey just enjoy the show [TS]

00:00:07   [Music] [TS]

00:00:13   ladies and gentlemen welcome to verdi [TS]

00:00:15   club how we all doing tonight [TS]

00:00:19   SF sketchfest proudly presents Roderick [TS]

00:00:23   on the line [TS]

00:00:28   you're listening to a live performance [TS]

00:00:30   of Roger online that was recorded on [TS]

00:00:33   january 23rd 2015 at very club in San [TS]

00:00:36   Francisco as part of the SF sketchfest [TS]

00:00:38   comedy festival thanks to kill Stratton [TS]

00:00:42   for inviting us to very club for hosting [TS]

00:00:44   us and a very club stage manager robert [TS]

00:00:47   west for recording and introducing us [TS]

00:00:49   somebody put some index cards on our [TS]

00:00:52   stage some notes next is going on [TS]

00:01:00   it's going great i'm in san francisco [TS]

00:01:01   which is amazing I've sort of perfected [TS]

00:01:05   this career path of going places where I [TS]

00:01:08   don't really get paid very much to [TS]

00:01:11   entertain people with my lifeblood [TS]

00:01:13   basically spilling it out on the stage [TS]

00:01:16   night after night exposure and I was [TS]

00:01:20   thinking about it being good exposure [TS]

00:01:21   the other day and then I realized i'm [TS]

00:01:22   i'm dying and you owe me if you're near [TS]

00:01:27   dying exposures what you want to avoid [TS]

00:01:29   right that's like what you're out too [TS]

00:01:31   long in the cold right you're fucking [TS]

00:01:32   dead that's exposure right right right [TS]

00:01:34   yeah avoid that I was just a inside [TS]

00:01:36   under a blanket like a gentleman i was [TS]

00:01:38   sitting in mice the shower of my hotel [TS]

00:01:40   room today one of those hotel rooms that [TS]

00:01:43   doesn't have a bathtub [TS]

00:01:44   ah so basically you know that it's a [TS]

00:01:47   hotel room made out of shipping [TS]

00:01:48   containers [TS]

00:01:50   it's this new fashion right no no [TS]

00:01:53   bathtubs what bathtubs are for old [TS]

00:01:54   people are for people with the psoriasis [TS]

00:01:57   sometimes SMS their doors or windows [TS]

00:01:59   were like yeah what was the one ace yes [TS]

00:02:02   you got an ace and it's more like a [TS]

00:02:04   scrim yeah the the agency had this drop [TS]

00:02:07   a really serious deuce inside the ACE [TS]

00:02:09   you would smell it two rooms and need [TS]

00:02:12   direction all of those hotels presume [TS]

00:02:15   that you are there with your you you [TS]

00:02:18   were there on the like 3rd weekend of [TS]

00:02:19   your new relationship and you want to [TS]

00:02:21   watch the other person shower and shit [TS]

00:02:23   right yeah I love her so much and what [TS]

00:02:27   they call it the tray just one yeah [TS]

00:02:28   that's right there and we're going [TS]

00:02:31   downtown buddy i just want to see her [TS]

00:02:33   just like shave under her arms and yeah [TS]

00:02:36   just like with no self conscious the [TS]

00:02:38   shine [TS]

00:02:40   wow yeah so I'm sitting in the shower [TS]

00:02:44   and of course I'm doing what I do when [TS]

00:02:45   I'm in the shower which is imagining [TS]

00:02:47   what if our alien overlords finally did [TS]

00:02:52   come appoint me as the human spokesman [TS]

00:02:54   and what I would ask in return and I [TS]

00:02:59   think what I would first ask is that [TS]

00:03:01   they go over meat head to toe with some [TS]

00:03:03   kind of scanner that takes away all the [TS]

00:03:05   cancer and the proto cancer and proto [TS]

00:03:09   cancer and and and whatever else all the [TS]

00:03:12   protozoan that have come in to my meet [TS]

00:03:15   all the thetans all the feelings that [TS]

00:03:19   are in me and then you know some minor [TS]

00:03:21   mahdi minor body modification that would [TS]

00:03:23   be simple for them to do right I've [TS]

00:03:25   always felt like I you know all my [TS]

00:03:27   height is in my face from the waist up [TS]

00:03:29   and I've always felt like [TS]

00:03:31   proportionately i have a my legs are [TS]

00:03:33   disproportionate to my torso and so [TS]

00:03:36   right just a little it's just it's one [TS]

00:03:38   of these even a little bit hard on [TS]

00:03:39   yourself it's one of these things that [TS]

00:03:41   are you alive that bad [TS]

00:03:42   no it's not it's not it's not gruesome [TS]

00:03:44   it's like if and until you pointed out [TS]

00:03:48   your like Dorf I mean like it's like if [TS]

00:03:50   you pointed out now if you look at me [TS]

00:03:52   thinking John because I'm pretty fucking [TS]

00:03:53   shortly well this is and this is that [TS]

00:03:55   what it does it gives me a low center of [TS]

00:03:57   gravity it makes me very difficult to [TS]

00:03:58   tackle have short everything have a [TS]

00:04:00   short torso i have short legs short [TS]

00:04:02   everything you have a long penis though [TS]

00:04:04   yes [TS]

00:04:05   but it's mainly the circumference right [TS]

00:04:07   right yeah I've seen it right so I think [TS]

00:04:10   we've been friends for a long time [TS]

00:04:12   yeah John i spent a lot of time in our [TS]

00:04:14   underwear continuously got pair [TS]

00:04:16   programming Merlin introduced the [TS]

00:04:20   concept to me as let me show you what is [TS]

00:04:22   on netflix yeah and i will let the [TS]

00:04:25   marathon of free-balling what's netflix [TS]

00:04:28   Merlin let's make them some butter so so [TS]

00:04:33   anyway I would have the aliens just you [TS]

00:04:35   know extend my leg by a couple of [TS]

00:04:37   centimeters just put me in proportion [TS]

00:04:39   that's nothing for them that's a [TS]

00:04:40   rounding error it's just a work and if [TS]

00:04:43   I'm gonna be standing up in front of all [TS]

00:04:44   humanities saying on behalf of our alien [TS]

00:04:47   overlords here's the plan [TS]

00:04:49   quid pro quo I want to look right bring [TS]

00:04:51   it yeah and then what you know some [TS]

00:04:54   other minor modification what I want [TS]

00:04:55   that front tooth back [TS]

00:04:57   yeah and how hard is that gonna be for [TS]

00:04:59   them right you correct your vision [TS]

00:05:00   because you like glasses [TS]

00:05:02   that's a really good question yeah you [TS]

00:05:04   could still have glasses i get asked [TS]

00:05:07   this a lot why don't you get surgery [TS]

00:05:08   uh-huh [TS]

00:05:10   I mean we had surgery to fix every [TS]

00:05:11   little problem why don't you get eye [TS]

00:05:13   surgery we gotta grow old with and I [TS]

00:05:15   don't you get that surgery where they [TS]

00:05:17   had two centimeters to your leg but I've [TS]

00:05:18   read about this i had a friend had a [TS]

00:05:21   friend elementary school they did that [TS]

00:05:22   to her oh she was nearly elfin she was [TS]

00:05:26   tiny not in the Middle Earth way she was [TS]

00:05:29   a little girl [TS]

00:05:30   mmm that's so and she was not really [TS]

00:05:36   super normative she was not growing in [TS]

00:05:38   the way they had anticipated she was off [TS]

00:05:39   the graph and there's apparently some [TS]

00:05:41   kind of horrific medieval 1970 surgery [TS]

00:05:44   where they could stretch your bone yeah [TS]

00:05:46   right they would like that rivers colon [TS]

00:05:48   surgery right they give you an [TS]

00:05:49   exoskeleton and then every day they [TS]

00:05:51   would they would turn the knob right and [TS]

00:05:54   it was just like neca reparation yeah [TS]

00:05:57   yeah and then you get a little bit [TS]

00:05:58   taller but not a lot i don't think they [TS]

00:06:00   can add like six inches to you but you [TS]

00:06:01   you're already pretty tall [TS]

00:06:03   it seems to me that just maybe standoffs [TS]

00:06:04   images not big no-no nothing that would [TS]

00:06:07   take away the essential John this but [TS]

00:06:09   how do you have that missing tooth along [TS]

00:06:11   with that [TS]

00:06:11   well i still have it it's just that I [TS]

00:06:12   have some [TS]

00:06:14   I just have some kind of like the [TS]

00:06:16   opposite of someone on hija [TS]

00:06:17   I like you have a cosmetic i want i went [TS]

00:06:20   into ikea and bought one of those [TS]

00:06:21   Chinese screens and cut it down and then [TS]

00:06:23   like a little bit think bone stuck it in [TS]

00:06:26   know this tooth that's in the center [TS]

00:06:28   here is just is just held in with epoxy [TS]

00:06:31   no seriously it wasn't so much its epoxy [TS]

00:06:36   between the duties so many foods how is [TS]

00:06:38   it in there i have drained myself to not [TS]

00:06:40   eat with that too [TS]

00:06:42   you're like my daughter with the missing [TS]

00:06:43   teeth to go around you like I going and [TS]

00:06:45   yeah I don't ya I'm not strategy i'm a [TS]

00:06:50   night [TS]

00:06:51   yeah i think it's an easy sell I think [TS]

00:06:53   aliens come in they want an insider and [TS]

00:06:55   they are going to just roll out the red [TS]

00:06:57   carpet whatever it is but I said this [TS]

00:06:58   before but i think it's going to be a [TS]

00:06:59   little bit of like you know throwing the [TS]

00:07:01   head of three the whip type situation [TS]

00:07:02   you're gonna have to get some of the [TS]

00:07:04   locals involves some of the natives [TS]

00:07:05   little bit little fixes little bit [TS]

00:07:08   Superman you know you are this audience [TS]

00:07:12   especially has watched as watched enough [TS]

00:07:15   x-men comic books [TS]

00:07:20   right to know Nick dependent to know [TS]

00:07:25   that a certain point you go grab any [TS]

00:07:29   raccoon and you nail him to a board and [TS]

00:07:31   you change his skeleton and then he [TS]

00:07:34   becomes friends with the tree and and [TS]

00:07:37   then you've been reading wikipedia and [TS]

00:07:40   this they scare up some trouble in the [TS]

00:07:43   universe and I feel like I feel like if [TS]

00:07:45   they can do that to a raccoon why [TS]

00:07:46   wouldn't they do it to an already [TS]

00:07:47   eighty-six percent specimen like myself [TS]

00:07:50   right right start with like start with a [TS]

00:07:53   good baseline see first here's the thing [TS]

00:07:57   first there was gonna want to do [TS]

00:07:58   whatever it takes to keep you alive if [TS]

00:07:59   you're the emissary right they need you [TS]

00:08:02   there they trust you for some reason [TS]

00:08:03   would you know would you know before [TS]

00:08:05   they do the treatments would you know if [TS]

00:08:07   they had already given you tasks to find [TS]

00:08:09   out the extent to which you are able to [TS]

00:08:10   be the emissary then how will you know [TS]

00:08:13   they know they know it's not that they [TS]

00:08:15   trust me it's that they trust that you [TS]

00:08:17   trust me Grasso they're not scanning me [TS]

00:08:21   they're scanning you [TS]

00:08:23   yes who do we trust and then they are [TS]

00:08:26   saying this name keeps coming up John [TS]

00:08:30   Rowley clubs or yeah there's a lot like [TS]

00:08:33   we don't trust John water and we don't [TS]

00:08:35   like him he's so tall but everybody [TS]

00:08:39   seems to say like all the people we [TS]

00:08:40   admire most all the all the computer [TS]

00:08:43   maths people who are gonna you know [TS]

00:08:46   we're going to help us keep the the [TS]

00:08:47   hydroelectric projects running all seem [TS]

00:08:49   to listen to this one podcast so we [TS]

00:08:52   better we better bioengineer the one guy [TS]

00:08:55   into like a super super human [TS]

00:08:58   that's what I'm just speculating it [TS]

00:09:01   sells itself [TS]

00:09:02   yeah so that's what i was doing today [TS]

00:09:05   sitting in the Charmin a lot of people [TS]

00:09:06   masturbate in the shower I might never [TS]

00:09:08   end never understood that [TS]

00:09:10   masturbating in the shower love [TS]

00:09:12   masturbating the shower thing seems like [TS]

00:09:13   a real key rail [TS]

00:09:15   it's just it's just it's one of those [TS]

00:09:16   things like playing quarters we're like [TS]

00:09:18   if you really need a game to drink seems [TS]

00:09:20   pretty weird i really like to enjoy more [TS]

00:09:23   of this alcohol but i cannot pass the [TS]

00:09:25   coin like you can masturbate literally [TS]

00:09:28   anywhere [TS]

00:09:29   do you remember that this is a darkroom [TS]

00:09:33   people do you remember the first time [TS]

00:09:38   you had sex in a hot tub and remember [TS]

00:09:40   the first time I tried me right right [TS]

00:09:43   now this is you know this is this is the [TS]

00:09:45   this is the quickest version of snipe [TS]

00:09:47   hunting we say that like smiling right [TS]

00:09:49   everyone stop funding and you go [TS]

00:09:51   no but I'm gee whiz I sure i'm willing [TS]

00:09:52   to try it take this sack you run out in [TS]

00:09:55   the woods and such and you catch a snipe [TS]

00:09:57   asking somebody that nobody has ever had [TS]

00:10:00   sex in a hot tub that is my pieces [TS]

00:10:02   well it turns out the way to have sex in [TS]

00:10:04   a hot tub is to have sex just out of a [TS]

00:10:06   hot tub [TS]

00:10:07   all right have to just get the sex parts [TS]

00:10:11   just above the water yes [TS]

00:10:13   the water's been treated there's redwood [TS]

00:10:15   a terrible idea why would you why would [TS]

00:10:17   you do that it's great because it seems [TS]

00:10:19   so sexy when you are just starting [TS]

00:10:22   having sex there's a lot of things that [TS]

00:10:24   seem really sexy when you start having [TS]

00:10:26   sex that just just leave them on the [TS]

00:10:29   dresser do not touch him don't do it but [TS]

00:10:31   there's so many of those a good friend [TS]

00:10:34   of mine said that she finds any [TS]

00:10:37   representation of sex in a shower to be [TS]

00:10:41   repulsive and I was like any [TS]

00:10:44   representation [TS]

00:10:45   what about that one where the octopus is [TS]

00:10:47   having sex with the girl [TS]

00:10:49   the Japanese comic book and she was like [TS]

00:10:54   I haven't seen that I was [TS]

00:10:55   on my way over [TS]

00:11:00   you know what it is it's a failure of [TS]

00:11:02   imagination right lack of exposure [TS]

00:11:06   yeah I don't know people having sex too [TS]

00:11:08   many places in the marijuana [TS]

00:11:10   what a mess haha oh yeah that marijuana [TS]

00:11:16   oh you know it used to be that you could [TS]

00:11:18   reliably have a live podcast in an [TS]

00:11:21   italian social hall in front of a bunch [TS]

00:11:22   of nerds in san francisco and be [TS]

00:11:24   confident that none of them had ever had [TS]

00:11:26   sex or smoke marijuana they're saving [TS]

00:11:30   themselves right but now I feel like [TS]

00:11:32   everybody in this place is probably [TS]

00:11:34   baked they're probably having [TS]

00:11:37   intercourse with the doobie right now [TS]

00:11:38   yeah and while they're there all baked [TS]

00:11:39   and they're probably finger banging the [TS]

00:11:41   person sitting next one is no question [TS]

00:11:43   man or woman why not friday night [TS]

00:11:45   surgery it's rare let's do it if we met [TS]

00:11:50   know these kids today [TS]

00:11:54   the reason I don't you like some reason [TS]

00:11:55   I don't use uber I was having this [TS]

00:11:57   conversation earlier today I used uber [TS]

00:11:58   one time because i believe and i believe [TS]

00:12:01   in the concept of uber it's a disruptive [TS]

00:12:03   technology and you know how i feel about [TS]

00:12:06   this run their knowledge that is really [TS]

00:12:08   hard I just want it i detect technology [TS]

00:12:11   isn't disruptive I got no time for you [TS]

00:12:15   know what it is it's [TS]

00:12:15   counter-revolutionary its counter [TS]

00:12:17   disruptive revolutionary but not them [TS]

00:12:19   the other ones is low we called legacy [TS]

00:12:21   industries the legacy industries were [TS]

00:12:22   carrying like a baby [TS]

00:12:24   we should all be out there trying the [TS]

00:12:25   truly revolutionary disruptive companies [TS]

00:12:27   when the legacy industry looks back on [TS]

00:12:29   the beach and they see one set of tire [TS]

00:12:31   prints it's me scurrying like a fucking [TS]

00:12:33   baby it's okay cabbie we're good so i [TS]

00:12:39   used uber one time and I was like I [TS]

00:12:42   looked at my uber that i downloaded the [TS]

00:12:44   app and I was already insulted it blinks [TS]

00:12:49   you had apps the blimp I because I [TS]

00:12:52   learned it starts to go just like that [TS]

00:12:55   shut up not doing anything poop and then [TS]

00:12:57   it said oh you have to go from you know [TS]

00:12:59   point A to point B is going to cost [TS]

00:13:01   thirty bucks and I was like okay good [TS]

00:13:02   let's like let's do it and then I made [TS]

00:13:05   the fatal error I was like you know what [TS]

00:13:06   actually I want to suburban i wanted i [TS]

00:13:10   don't know I shall require a suburban i [TS]

00:13:13   don't i don't wanna make this trip in a [TS]

00:13:14   previous i see that there is a suburban [TS]

00:13:16   option and I'm going to take it and then [TS]

00:13:18   somewhere in the transaction some kind [TS]

00:13:23   of surge pricing came in and by the end [TS]

00:13:27   of the thing and then you know the guy [TS]

00:13:28   is very nice and he gives you two [TS]

00:13:30   bottles of dasani water that you toss [TS]

00:13:31   immediately out the window [TS]

00:13:33   why because the sunny water is just coke [TS]

00:13:35   water full of salt and impurities asked [TS]

00:13:38   her what kind of animal haha Iraq who [TS]

00:13:42   are tracking a dead raccoon you're [TS]

00:13:45   welcome mom and so so then the bill [TS]

00:13:49   comes what like a day later or two days [TS]

00:13:51   later somebody $225 want me to drive [TS]

00:13:54   across town during some kind of search [TS]

00:13:55   surge pricing some sort of serve because [TS]

00:13:58   surge and I was just like this is [TS]

00:14:00   bullshit fuck this company how was the [TS]

00:14:02   suburban was it nice my superb yeah [TS]

00:14:05   leather seats shocking i had to do a [TS]

00:14:09   thing to go to Portland last weekend and [TS]

00:14:12   48 port 1 i'm not saying they said do [TS]

00:14:15   you want us to get you the airport I [TS]

00:14:16   said no problem i'll just get an uber [TS]

00:14:18   and an important nuber is just like a [TS]

00:14:25   green subaru outback like a 17-hour an [TS]

00:14:28   89 subaru outback right yeah that's [TS]

00:14:30   being pulled by six fixes are not Santa [TS]

00:14:34   everybody's got fucking neck tattoos and [TS]

00:14:37   Macklemore haircut [TS]

00:14:39   whatever [TS]

00:14:44   now now i know seriously what we're [TS]

00:14:45   doing in Portland why are you say don't [TS]

00:14:47   have over there they don't have over [TS]

00:14:49   when you can't pump your own gas works [TS]

00:14:50   out well I know that only remember all [TS]

00:14:53   that you know Portland shot him down [TS]

00:14:54   portland is the last place where Maoist [TS]

00:14:57   job work work programs are still in [TS]

00:14:59   effect that it is it working it seems [TS]

00:15:02   like people are doing pretty well people [TS]

00:15:03   keep moving there [TS]

00:15:04   yes very flat they keep moving there and [TS]

00:15:07   they work at a gas station and then they [TS]

00:15:09   graduate to like the dreamcatcher [TS]

00:15:10   factory and they work work their way up [TS]

00:15:13   but it's not a hierarchical system there [TS]

00:15:15   ma'am can I get to be a hog waxer you [TS]

00:15:19   can you can become a Macklemore shiner [TS]

00:15:21   you can just move all the way up joint [TS]

00:15:23   roller fixing analyst joint roller to [TS]

00:15:25   the mayor jim joint roller to the mayor [TS]

00:15:28   to bracket you know Portland is an [TS]

00:15:31   amazing place and I guy I give it a lot [TS]

00:15:33   of shit because uh because it feels like [TS]

00:15:35   us like a younger sibling that hasn't [TS]

00:15:38   really been to college yet or it's like [TS]

00:15:42   Seattle it's like if Seattle had never [TS]

00:15:43   gotten this ass kicked [TS]

00:15:45   yeah well no Portland got its ass kicked [TS]

00:15:47   it's like if Seattle's balls never drop [TS]

00:15:50   oh right which is amazing but I mean I [TS]

00:15:53   can't really talk about that they're in [TS]

00:15:55   there but we can't find them [TS]

00:15:56   yeah that's my one of the conditions and [TS]

00:15:59   its really it's a really nice town [TS]

00:16:01   what were you doing there I can't say [TS]

00:16:02   are you so cryptic about your job why [TS]

00:16:04   are you so asking about questions [TS]

00:16:06   Jesus when I first met Merlin he had a [TS]

00:16:12   pc thats [TS]

00:16:15   you know and I his job was riding [TS]

00:16:22   computer maths uh for the like the early [TS]

00:16:27   internet which was some kind of thing [TS]

00:16:29   where you like you did the little when [TS]

00:16:31   you met me I had a pc and my job was [TS]

00:16:34   writing computer mass for the N yeah you [TS]

00:16:36   did the little you're like would you [TS]

00:16:38   like a website what if a little man came [TS]

00:16:39   out carrying a flag and said you know [TS]

00:16:41   like hey click attracted little animated [TS]

00:16:45   gif gifs and it's been a gov hag and now [TS]

00:16:52   whenever I ask you about your job or [TS]

00:16:54   what you're doing you're like me sorry [TS]

00:16:56   can't talk about it [TS]

00:16:57   need-to-know information John need to [TS]

00:16:59   know yeah those are crazy days I am [TS]

00:17:03   it was so fun to be there for you [TS]

00:17:09   haltingly accepting the idea the [TS]

00:17:12   internet might exist and then having to [TS]

00:17:14   slowly so slowly confront what it might [TS]

00:17:18   mean if you actually looked at it and [TS]

00:17:20   got involved in it because you were I [TS]

00:17:22   mean not exaggerated but you were pretty [TS]

00:17:24   skeptical about every aspect of it still [TS]

00:17:27   and now know you're so excited now [TS]

00:17:30   you're loving it [TS]

00:17:31   I the truth be told I go on twitter i go [TS]

00:17:37   on what a some other day when i go on at [TS]

00:17:41   ebay because sometimes there are belt [TS]

00:17:44   buckles there [TS]

00:17:45   and then sometimes i go on the I go on [TS]

00:17:49   the google and-and-and like a google [TS]

00:17:52   questions about the seahawks to try and [TS]

00:17:56   figure out what everybody's yelling [TS]

00:17:57   about [TS]

00:17:58   but the football team I'm very happy [TS]

00:18:01   about them while hate crime down you are [TS]

00:18:04   you of what are you what's your feeling [TS]

00:18:09   on something other than one of those [TS]

00:18:10   little moo-cows that when you turn it on [TS]

00:18:14   you like a 49ers fan [TS]

00:18:20   oh I bleed whatever their colors are up [TS]

00:18:24   i assume is how we would have to be a [TS]

00:18:30   49ers fan because Wow [TS]

00:18:34   Oh settle down you think you're better [TS]

00:18:36   than me you sound like a cowboys fan [TS]

00:18:44   think you're better than me [TS]

00:18:45   nighters on the local team you have [TS]

00:18:52   football's so I but i know i'm very [TS]

00:18:56   excited about it because of the [TS]

00:18:57   athleticism and has competitive spirit [TS]

00:18:59   dynamism and the it's an opportunity for [TS]

00:19:02   tribalism which is a thing i'm very [TS]

00:19:04   interested in branding and I was just I [TS]

00:19:08   was just in Africa [TS]

00:19:11   um I'm not signaling we will be doing [TS]

00:19:13   i'm not saying on the tribalism I'm [TS]

00:19:15   segwaying on the i'll take it how big i [TS]

00:19:19   want to know I want to know what one [TS]

00:19:20   privileged white man learned from going [TS]

00:19:21   to Africa I'm I i I'm segwaying on the [TS]

00:19:26   i'm sorry i was just hope that my talent [TS]

00:19:28   when I wanna when when we're doing our [TS]

00:19:30   podcast sometimes I play with the bill [TS]

00:19:32   you do that really did it doesn't make [TS]

00:19:33   any noise I just I just do this and I [TS]

00:19:37   started doing that I don't know it's not [TS]

00:19:39   okay right [TS]

00:19:40   um I i was there and i realized that [TS]

00:19:44   there are no people in the US armed [TS]

00:19:47   forces from the west coast or the east [TS]

00:19:51   coast they are all from Texas and [TS]

00:19:53   Georgia like they pulled the plug on [TS]

00:19:58   georgia and all the soldiers everybody's [TS]

00:20:00   from there and they are a lot of them [TS]

00:20:02   stationed in california but their [TS]

00:20:04   football loyalties are all four teams [TS]

00:20:08   that are in the american south blvd [TS]

00:20:11   atlanta peaches [TS]

00:20:12   yep the Dallas dustbowl yeah the the [TS]

00:20:15   Florida swamps [TS]

00:20:17   arkansas apologies so I was there [TS]

00:20:20   Alabama reparations i was there in the [TS]

00:20:22   West Virginia no we're not Virginia [TS]

00:20:24   there is no west virginia football team [TS]

00:20:28   yeah sure you get the coal mining coal [TS]

00:20:31   miners daughter haha they have a giant [TS]

00:20:34   Loretta Lynn carrier yeah they're little [TS]

00:20:36   butt brother can take a hit [TS]

00:20:39   um I'll come on you come up that way you [TS]

00:20:44   know what they're made of tough stuff [TS]

00:20:45   those girls [TS]

00:20:47   yeah anyway so I'm there and I'm like [TS]

00:20:48   well seahawks right and I was just [TS]

00:20:51   greeted with i mean i was already [TS]

00:20:52   greeted with a wall of military like [TS]

00:20:55   hula hula who are right but no there [TS]

00:20:58   were no Seahawks fans i was very soon [TS]

00:21:00   not at all [TS]

00:21:01   oh just it was I mean I guess everybody [TS]

00:21:03   hates the Patriots right haha for this [TS]

00:21:08   this i'm really really pandering to this [TS]

00:21:10   audience on what's up with their heads [TS]

00:21:12   up with their team new england i right [TS]

00:21:15   thanks Obama wear their clothes are [TS]

00:21:20   primarily white football [TS]

00:21:25   thanks for coming tonight was my [TS]

00:21:27   pleasure [TS]

00:21:29   it's a great place to do this this is [TS]

00:21:31   amazing i want to take your fabric i [TS]

00:21:32   wanna hear about the rains down in [TS]

00:21:33   africa the weekend here i did not know [TS]

00:21:35   what we were walking into here but what [TS]

00:21:37   I was surprised that was I assumed every [TS]

00:21:39   italian social club had a big white [TS]

00:21:41   wedding cake on the stage at all times [TS]

00:21:43   right i want to have the personality [TS]

00:21:45   Spencer just keeps popping back up but [TS]

00:21:47   where's the freaking cake and Mama comes [TS]

00:21:50   up to sing and unknown and i feel like [TS]

00:21:53   these chandeliers are very similar to [TS]

00:21:55   the chandelier that hung over our dining [TS]

00:21:58   room table in the 70s those in a smaller [TS]

00:22:01   version hungover every rental home in [TS]

00:22:03   Florida in the nineteen eighties is a [TS]

00:22:05   little bit like very reminiscent yeah [TS]

00:22:07   this this this place is amazing it is [TS]

00:22:10   really it's been affected by every [TS]

00:22:13   problematic design problem with the last [TS]

00:22:15   60 years and yet the photos the ladies [TS]

00:22:17   room is upstairs [TS]

00:22:18   you're welcome and there are some [TS]

00:22:19   amazing photos on the wall it's [TS]

00:22:21   fantastic well and this green velvet [TS]

00:22:23   green though i just bought a green [TS]

00:22:29   velvet suit on ebay really i'm amazed I [TS]

00:22:33   was on there looking at belt buckle and [TS]

00:22:36   i love it and i don't know what you know [TS]

00:22:38   I don't know what happened i click the [TS]

00:22:39   hyperlink it was a you know it was x.x [TS]

00:22:44   HTML [TS]

00:22:45   yes of valid happened down and suddenly [TS]

00:22:50   i was looking at green velvet suits and [TS]

00:22:51   I was like that was my size and I just [TS]

00:22:53   bought it just spontaneously which is [TS]

00:22:55   why I shouldn't go on ebay and it came [TS]

00:22:57   in the mail and it fits and I feel like [TS]

00:22:59   a couch and I'm like I'm so happy and I [TS]

00:23:05   almost thought about it almost thought [TS]

00:23:07   about wearing a tutu the show but then I [TS]

00:23:09   felt like it [TS]

00:23:10   that's not really a travel suit you know [TS]

00:23:12   like yeah right like you get you're [TS]

00:23:13   traveling you're you're wearing down the [TS]

00:23:15   velvet now that that's an in-situ at [TS]

00:23:19   home kind of soup do you wear that you [TS]

00:23:21   wear that I mean the problem is that a [TS]

00:23:22   lot of people and i'm sure people in [TS]

00:23:23   this room have made this mistake you [TS]

00:23:25   think green belt is a Christmas right [TS]

00:23:27   it's not accurate but you don't want to [TS]

00:23:29   wear your green velvet suit on Christmas [TS]

00:23:31   or Easter that is just too on the note [TS]

00:23:33   on the nest yeah you want to wear your [TS]

00:23:35   green velvet suit to say [TS]

00:23:37   the Rotary Club meeting or while you're [TS]

00:23:41   reading bible verses to the girl didn't [TS]

00:23:43   hurt man tension on the elliptical my [TS]

00:23:51   man dungeon [TS]

00:23:53   I love it so you're not so Luke says [TS]

00:23:57   you'll notice that they have they have [TS]

00:23:59   the nineteen eighties are deco like pho [TS]

00:24:03   art deco chandeliers [TS]

00:24:05   yeah but on the stage they replaced the [TS]

00:24:07   analog lights with digital lights yeah [TS]

00:24:10   it's it's it was like leds right they [TS]

00:24:13   are led to the green like the stage [TS]

00:24:16   they're all the colors all the colors of [TS]

00:24:18   the rainbow if the rainbow has three [TS]

00:24:20   color and it creates a very lifelike a [TS]

00:24:27   glow if you live in an operating room I [TS]

00:24:32   it feels a little bit hall of presidents [TS]

00:24:33   to me wow well it's like it's like in [TS]

00:24:36   the leg put this 10 and it's not a mean [TS]

00:24:38   way but like if every town has like the [TS]

00:24:40   nice community theater and the other one [TS]

00:24:41   and that one decided to have the challah [TS]

00:24:43   president has a show for the whole [TS]

00:24:45   president yes are you talking about is [TS]

00:24:47   that that's the show at chuck-e-cheese [TS]

00:24:48   right where they play banjos right [TS]

00:24:50   Calvin Coolidge i will not be remembered [TS]

00:24:53   when bus your tray but this is you know [TS]

00:24:58   these things these LED lights they are [TS]

00:25:00   really solving a problem that it's like [TS]

00:25:02   solving a non-problem I feel like yeah [TS]

00:25:04   I'm against in general [TS]

00:25:07   LED lights in my own home I am very much [TS]

00:25:11   like many things in our culture today [TS]

00:25:12   very much in favor of you doing it if [TS]

00:25:16   that's what turns you on [TS]

00:25:17   yes you want to have if you want to [TS]

00:25:18   change your lightbulbs or two LEDs and I [TS]

00:25:20   don't want to be one of these people [TS]

00:25:21   that's like has a conspiracy theory [TS]

00:25:23   website talking about well I can't [TS]

00:25:25   frankly i do but i can help you with [TS]

00:25:26   that but I don't want it to be about I [TS]

00:25:29   don't want to get it to be about light [TS]

00:25:30   bulbs obviously it's gonna be about [TS]

00:25:31   chemtrails to keep your powder dry but [TS]

00:25:34   this whole led thing it just feels like [TS]

00:25:36   that whole thing that we've it's like [TS]

00:25:37   recycling paper towels or whatever we're [TS]

00:25:39   talking about 15 years ago it's like [TS]

00:25:41   really paper towels really see I was you [TS]

00:25:43   I'd all the whole recycling thing that's [TS]

00:25:45   gonna like Penn Jillette but I I don't [TS]

00:25:47   understand how that is viable [TS]

00:25:50   someone drives around a fucking truck [TS]

00:25:52   picks up your Rolling Rock bottles and [TS]

00:25:55   then what does that get made into a park [TS]

00:25:56   bench like a helmet like what happens [TS]

00:25:58   with that gets made into helmet [TS]

00:26:00   have you noticed how many kids are [TS]

00:26:02   wearing helmets now glass helmet haha [TS]

00:26:04   class 10 mile of glass helmet my [TS]

00:26:08   cyclists there from there from homburg [TS]

00:26:11   means gutenberg sound I I this is the [TS]

00:26:15   thing when i was a kid [TS]

00:26:16   no kids wore helmets know what was the [TS]

00:26:19   crucifer you the first time you saw [TS]

00:26:20   somebody in a helmet [TS]

00:26:21   I it was about read his friend died for [TS]

00:26:24   not working on it was a back then our [TS]

00:26:26   heads would explode like melons and we [TS]

00:26:28   thought it was part of the process [TS]

00:26:30   the old man is standing on a car seat [TS]

00:26:32   when people wore helmets were test [TS]

00:26:34   pilots and cops like my motorcycle cops [TS]

00:26:36   right right and now I was in park slope [TS]

00:26:39   i'm not very long ago in like the kids [TS]

00:26:40   wearing helmets in the grocery store and [TS]

00:26:45   it's part of the pits pits Brooklyn it's [TS]

00:26:47   part of the problem but it's happening [TS]

00:26:48   here to I'd must be yeah I got mixed [TS]

00:26:51   feelings [TS]

00:26:52   I got mixed feelings because on the one [TS]

00:26:53   hand like I wish you could be a little [TS]

00:26:55   kid in a very very heavy pontiac like [TS]

00:26:58   standing on the seat while your father [TS]

00:27:00   drives and smokes that's an indelible [TS]

00:27:02   wonderful memory for me lot of problems [TS]

00:27:04   with it [TS]

00:27:05   let's be honest what was the first time [TS]

00:27:07   somebody went around the corner and the [TS]

00:27:09   door opened and you fell out [TS]

00:27:10   well how many times I mean that's just [TS]

00:27:13   how you do [TS]

00:27:14   yeah yeah one time we lost my sister [TS]

00:27:16   right out the door and fortunately it [TS]

00:27:20   was like into a patch of gravel and so [TS]

00:27:22   she just she's she's an athlete she [TS]

00:27:25   patio lid and roll and I think she was [TS]

00:27:27   crying mostly because she was startled [TS]

00:27:30   what what block it off Susan you're [TS]

00:27:33   gonna write your dad just listen to big [TS]

00:27:35   band music really loud [TS]

00:27:37   no that was my mom's car actually uh you [TS]

00:27:39   know that that was one of the my mom's [TS]

00:27:41   car she had a Dodge daughter dodge dart [TS]

00:27:43   swinger and unfortunately I think what [TS]

00:27:46   her version of reality was that we hung [TS]

00:27:49   on the doors and swung on the doors and [TS]

00:27:53   ruined the hinges or something [TS]

00:27:55   now I don't ever remember a single time [TS]

00:27:57   swinging on the door sounds like you but [TS]

00:28:01   I mean think about how fun that is [TS]

00:28:04   it's just a one-way trip and it's pretty [TS]

00:28:06   short like you can't really like where [TS]

00:28:07   am I going [TS]

00:28:08   bonk yeah so I don't remember doing it [TS]

00:28:11   but mom always swore that the doors were [TS]

00:28:13   sprung that was the terms you use these [TS]

00:28:15   doors are sprung their sprung because [TS]

00:28:18   you hung on them and swung around you [TS]

00:28:20   remember when you started wearing [TS]

00:28:21   seatbelts remember this here's the thing [TS]

00:28:23   i don't remember seatbelts being in cars [TS]

00:28:25   i remember we bought a car that went [TS]

00:28:27   beep when you sat in it without putting [TS]

00:28:29   Suppan my mom took it the Pontiac [TS]

00:28:31   dealership and disconnect and reconnect [TS]

00:28:32   could just shut off that Deeping up my [TS]

00:28:36   recollection is that top saving my [TS]

00:28:38   family start and starting in about [TS]

00:28:41   nineteen eighty-eight I had a very clear [TS]

00:28:44   sense that you wore a seatbelt in [TS]

00:28:46   european cars but not in American cars [TS]

00:28:51   that's back when European cars came with [TS]

00:28:55   an O God handle right american cars did [TS]

00:28:57   not at night right if you got a German [TS]

00:28:58   car or you know if you have japanese [TS]

00:29:00   crack any kind of like an import car [TS]

00:29:01   they would they were way more swinging [TS]

00:29:03   on the road he kind of needed that [TS]

00:29:05   yeah you have to hold on to something [TS]

00:29:06   enables 80 runs from pwc have little [TS]

00:29:08   straps you hang onto of course yeah [TS]

00:29:11   oh my god the times other times i have [TS]

00:29:12   hanging onto the strap of everybody [TS]

00:29:14   everybody inside is intoxicated from the [TS]

00:29:16   gas fumes [TS]

00:29:18   it's the gas from the heater right the [TS]

00:29:20   gas it's not the gas from the motor [TS]

00:29:21   because that's behind but the [TS]

00:29:22   gas-powered heater that's right under [TS]

00:29:23   than I my bus had an engine in the back [TS]

00:29:25   and I smell that gas good and strong i [TS]

00:29:28   had a bus and it caught on fire and ice [TS]

00:29:30   melt that [TS]

00:29:31   you know what I learned it's really [TS]

00:29:33   super important to change the oil in a [TS]

00:29:35   VW super duper important to a too little [TS]

00:29:40   too late otherwise you get this [TS]

00:29:42   expression from your girlfriend [TS]

00:29:44   we are recording this to put out as a [TS]

00:29:49   podcast so I was making a face the [TS]

00:29:51   ghosts but it's and my wife Camille mm [TS]

00:29:55   no I definitely remember feeling a very [TS]

00:29:58   clear distinction between cars you wore [TS]

00:30:00   seat belts in cars you didn't and I feel [TS]

00:30:02   like cars you didn't wear a seatbelt in [TS]

00:30:04   were cars where if the if your if your [TS]

00:30:07   significant other was in the other chair [TS]

00:30:09   if it was just like a big upholstered [TS]

00:30:12   couch and they could like scooch over as [TS]

00:30:15   you were driving aids you don't want to [TS]

00:30:17   seat belt in there no way but if you [TS]

00:30:19   were in a car that bucket seats and [TS]

00:30:21   they're gonna emergency break in between [TS]

00:30:22   and there was no chance of like [TS]

00:30:24   migratory like sex but yes why not put a [TS]

00:30:29   seatbelt on most of the cars had the [TS]

00:30:32   best seat fancy big bench these is on [TS]

00:30:35   chrysler imperial it was a chrysler [TS]

00:30:37   newport Imperial it was at a time in the [TS]

00:30:41   Chrysler model range where they were [TS]

00:30:43   just throwing all the names it that was [TS]

00:30:45   likely to be a greater all good yeah [TS]

00:30:47   here's be a Chrysler Imperial now [TS]

00:30:48   there's going to be a chrysler newport [TS]

00:30:50   can make them both limited-edition [TS]

00:30:52   chrysler newport imperial and and that [TS]

00:30:55   had a seat [TS]

00:30:56   I mean seriously if you were sitting in [TS]

00:30:57   the passenger seat of the Chrysler you [TS]

00:30:59   would be further away from me than you [TS]

00:31:00   are now she's i remember i could lay [TS]

00:31:03   down in the back of our pontiac till I [TS]

00:31:05   was about 11 just like all the way [TS]

00:31:07   across without touching on either side [TS]

00:31:08   now that big-ass call damn America [TS]

00:31:11   what's happened to us what is happening [TS]

00:31:15   we have fallen so far and our podcast [TS]

00:31:18   has fallen so far we are just now of old [TS]

00:31:21   man how does anybody get sex but now [TS]

00:31:25   I don't think you're allowed to have sex [TS]

00:31:26   now except in like constrained [TS]

00:31:29   circumstances you have to share a banana [TS]

00:31:31   seat I think it's antioch rules all the [TS]

00:31:32   time now what is that [TS]

00:31:34   antioch rules you have to like fill out [TS]

00:31:35   a form oh can I get another I they were [TS]

00:31:39   right as can I go to second and a half [TS]

00:31:41   base yeah there is no second and a half [TS]

00:31:44   base there there you don't understand [TS]

00:31:47   baseball [TS]

00:31:48   no I don't know people keep reading [TS]

00:31:51   I keep seeing people with happy smiles [TS]

00:31:53   on their faces they might want to have [TS]

00:31:54   the same people must be the same people [TS]

00:31:56   i don't think new people are dependent [TS]

00:31:57   on oil into the intercourse thing I [TS]

00:31:59   think it's because the same people just [TS]

00:32:00   repeating it over and over that's all I [TS]

00:32:03   can figure was the last time you saw [TS]

00:32:04   somebody with more than one or two kids [TS]

00:32:07   rarely well no in San Francisco you live [TS]

00:32:10   in a big city big in bruns a small part [TS]

00:32:12   of the big city in San Francisco if [TS]

00:32:15   you're in a couple you need to have two [TS]

00:32:17   kids and one dog or one kid and two dogs [TS]

00:32:20   you could potentially have two kids and [TS]

00:32:23   two dogs that is within the zoning but [TS]

00:32:26   if you have two dogs in one kid you [TS]

00:32:28   better be working on another fucking kid [TS]

00:32:29   well you know I have you they come in [TS]

00:32:31   pairs have one kid you have one kid far [TS]

00:32:35   as i know my kid the other day said I [TS]

00:32:38   want a sister and I said you might get a [TS]

00:32:44   brother if you're not careful [TS]

00:32:51   and she said that's fine because she has [TS]

00:32:57   no idea what words mean but she said [TS]

00:33:05   this I want a sister in earshot of her [TS]

00:33:08   mother who then looked at me with arched [TS]

00:33:11   eyebrows signifying all of eternity and [TS]

00:33:18   then I was like running up a sandy hill [TS]

00:33:21   happened [TS]

00:33:26   it's such an innocent request run up a [TS]

00:33:31   sandy hill thinking of all kinds of [TS]

00:33:32   things and I was like I have to have a [TS]

00:33:34   plane to catch [TS]

00:33:36   so that's where we left it [TS]

00:33:41   when i get back to Seattle they're going [TS]

00:33:43   to show up at the airport baby in the [TS]

00:33:45   car seat baby's momma and they're both [TS]

00:33:48   gonna be arching their eyebrows at me [TS]

00:33:49   I'm gonna be standing there with a [TS]

00:33:50   guitar in one hand and a suitcase in the [TS]

00:33:52   other was supposed to have an answer [TS]

00:33:54   turn on your heel and walked back on the [TS]

00:33:56   plane [TS]

00:33:57   wow what an awkward conversation well i [TS]

00:34:00   don't know i mean people have been [TS]

00:34:01   happening for thousands of years [TS]

00:34:03   yeah I guess so what do you do what do [TS]

00:34:05   you want to work what do you do when [TS]

00:34:06   your kids I want a brother or sister [TS]

00:34:08   I think the stroke haha that's really [TS]

00:34:11   interesting first down [TS]

00:34:15   I you know it's the same as when she [TS]

00:34:17   wants a pet like it a lot of fucking [TS]

00:34:18   work honey [TS]

00:34:19   like you know she she thinks like I want [TS]

00:34:21   a cat i want a dog i want to whatever [TS]

00:34:23   and it's like like yeah you know I can't [TS]

00:34:25   get you to finish a bath like what do [TS]

00:34:27   you know how much work it is to have [TS]

00:34:29   another person in the house that you buy [TS]

00:34:31   things for i love that extraordinary i [TS]

00:34:33   love that thinking what if I just say [TS]

00:34:34   you'll have to clean up after your [TS]

00:34:38   little brother you're gonna have to feed [TS]

00:34:39   him and clean and clean his cage [TS]

00:34:40   well I think the kennel McLean [TS]

00:34:44   mechanical kennel yeah that well i mean [TS]

00:34:46   i think it's it's something where like [TS]

00:34:47   if you really want to address the [TS]

00:34:50   question and break their spirit make [TS]

00:34:51   them earn it in a way you know they [TS]

00:34:53   can't haha just kidding me that's all I [TS]

00:34:57   was raised [TS]

00:34:58   it's like like finally somebody that i [TS]

00:35:02   cannot think it's I mean it's not going [TS]

00:35:06   to be consistent it's not going to be [TS]

00:35:07   forever but like it's so fucking obvious [TS]

00:35:09   with everything that she's trying to do [TS]

00:35:10   too much about the compromises right [TS]

00:35:12   when she says daddy i have a compromise [TS]

00:35:14   yeah tonight instead of a bath i will [TS]

00:35:16   have chocolate and watch Goldfinger [TS]

00:35:18   again [TS]

00:35:19   I say that's very compelling but i am [TS]

00:35:22   not really sure which part of that [TS]

00:35:24   constitutes a compromise [TS]

00:35:26   okay i have five chocolates and going [TS]

00:35:29   for that but know that my daughter has [TS]

00:35:33   just recently started saying to me daddy [TS]

00:35:37   I like all boys except warm and I go [TS]

00:35:45   I'll bite who's the one boy you don't [TS]

00:35:50   like she says daddy so precious and i [TS]

00:35:58   say i've been dealing with your kind for [TS]

00:36:00   a lot longer than you've been alive [TS]

00:36:03   anything else I know how this ends [TS]

00:36:08   you have a baby with me wait a minute [TS]

00:36:10   it's rather exceptional know [TS]

00:36:15   ah yeah but like I love you like that i [TS]

00:36:21   can just see it coming from a mile off [TS]

00:36:22   and you know most the time I want to be [TS]

00:36:24   a good steward of that kind of thing I [TS]

00:36:26   don't want to punish the child for being [TS]

00:36:27   ambitious with me she could fool me but [TS]

00:36:29   i do have to be able to draw the line a [TS]

00:36:30   little bit because there are things [TS]

00:36:31   where that's you know compromise and so [TS]

00:36:34   you get to be like a like a Greek god [TS]

00:36:37   and come up with tasks that must be [TS]

00:36:40   performed [TS]

00:36:40   Oh whoo haha oh you you want to have a [TS]

00:36:46   baby brother [TS]

00:36:49   oh right well since when do greek gods [TS]

00:36:51   talk like southern lawyers [TS]

00:36:53   depends on the firm you're hiring oh you [TS]

00:36:59   want a big brother all that that's an [TS]

00:37:01   interesting idea maybe we'll start with [TS]

00:37:06   a cat and you clean your room every [TS]

00:37:08   night for six weeks was young knows it [TS]

00:37:13   he just set her up for failure I'm gonna [TS]

00:37:15   put a magnet here do anything doesn't [TS]

00:37:19   matter it's obvious after a day failure [TS]

00:37:21   crying tears insult me by buying me [TS]

00:37:25   something I hope it's not alive because [TS]

00:37:26   obviously you can't take care of it [TS]

00:37:28   I'm moving the magnet it's the thing [TS]

00:37:33   also with money she's decided she wants [TS]

00:37:35   to you know who fucking cares it's a kid [TS]

00:37:36   I know shut up but I i think i'll be [TS]

00:37:38   over in a second but it's really super [TS]

00:37:39   annoying she she's discovered things [TS]

00:37:42   like money everything now and she wants [TS]

00:37:44   more of stuff and she wants to have a [TS]

00:37:46   mansion she wants to be she has a heist [TS]

00:37:49   that she's working on pulling off so she [TS]

00:37:50   can buy a boat look yeah yeah well I but [TS]

00:37:55   the thing is i candidly I'm trying to [TS]

00:37:57   explain to her how to get away with [TS]

00:37:59   stuff in life and I want to do in a [TS]

00:38:01   useful way but please and thank you [TS]

00:38:03   honey [TS]

00:38:04   terrific way to get away with stuff also [TS]

00:38:08   if you're going to have a heist don't [TS]

00:38:09   tell me about it even if you're going to [TS]

00:38:11   have a heist if you're gonna jump out a [TS]

00:38:13   window and you need me to have a [TS]

00:38:14   mattress out there that you can jump on [TS]

00:38:16   you should get somebody else involved [TS]

00:38:18   cuz i'm totally not going to do that I [TS]

00:38:20   don't want you to be at our house with [TS]

00:38:22   the treasure that you stolen so don't [TS]

00:38:24   tell me about the plan see I'mI'm first [TS]

00:38:26   of all I want to succeed but you know [TS]

00:38:28   not not at my peril [TS]

00:38:30   I'm hoping that that my daughter is [TS]

00:38:32   interested in pulling off some heists [TS]

00:38:33   Kanye and I really want her to tell me [TS]

00:38:36   about it because finally somebody around [TS]

00:38:37   here we have a good plan for a fucking [TS]

00:38:39   heist [TS]

00:38:40   right like that's part of my problem i'm [TS]

00:38:42   waiting around for somebody to come to [TS]

00:38:44   me and say like here's the bank here's [TS]

00:38:45   where we dig the pole in the swimming [TS]

00:38:47   pool of the club next door [TS]

00:38:49   right right here's the deal we buy a [TS]

00:38:51   hardware store but everybody's always [TS]

00:38:54   waited for 15 years and suddenly we move [TS]

00:38:59   into the baby clothes store next door [TS]

00:39:01   and wait wait wait we retire we get a [TS]

00:39:06   facelift we come in we would address [TS]

00:39:08   outside the window get the treasure and [TS]

00:39:09   go back to the house [TS]

00:39:10   he's got a very very long con idea of [TS]

00:39:12   how heists go suite 260 yeah I love a [TS]

00:39:16   long con [TS]

00:39:17   i I just introduced flow to the idea of [TS]

00:39:21   money [TS]

00:39:21   come on up by a bloop it now oh right [TS]

00:39:24   sorry but I just said her name [TS]

00:39:27   that's not a thing that we typically do [TS]

00:39:28   forget it erase your minds do you mean [TS]

00:39:31   wow [TS]

00:39:32   um i'm using my powers given to me by [TS]

00:39:34   our alien overlords to selectively erase [TS]

00:39:37   your mind I will help you with my former [TS]

00:39:40   cancers butt so anyway not to I'm [TS]

00:39:46   keeping my work you have melanomas on [TS]

00:39:48   your face maje my collection of my [TS]

00:39:51   former cancers is one of my favorite [TS]

00:39:53   collection i love that that slow EPA i [TS]

00:39:55   just bought one of those little curio [TS]

00:39:57   boxes and I have each little cancerous [TS]

00:40:00   blob in there she'll spend it looks like [TS]

00:40:03   the good looks like the box of rocks [TS]

00:40:04   they give you when you take intro to [TS]

00:40:06   geology every one of them is new number [TS]

00:40:08   two name little personal cancer GIS and [TS]

00:40:11   smells bar but i but i was so not to [TS]

00:40:15   bring it back to my recent trip to [TS]

00:40:17   Africa which obviously i'm going to talk [TS]

00:40:18   about but I was a was embedded in our in [TS]

00:40:22   the 10 this happens embedded you know [TS]

00:40:25   what you know what Dan Benjamin maybe [TS]

00:40:27   wants to start a podcast network [TS]

00:40:30   I bet it's already recording some way up [TS]

00:40:35   every show is four-and-a-half hours long [TS]

00:40:38   here's here's the thing about olive jars [TS]

00:40:43   every show is born hours long because [TS]

00:40:46   dan Benjamin didn't invest in a bell [TS]

00:40:48   haha i ever tell you about the time I [TS]

00:40:53   learned to drive a gene in and then in [TS]

00:40:56   it anyway in the when your when your [TS]

00:40:59   embedded what you get when your embedded [TS]

00:41:01   with the Special Forces team as I've [TS]

00:41:03   recently been this is part of a military [TS]

00:41:06   culture that maybe you a you hippies [TS]

00:41:10   won't know anything about but the [TS]

00:41:12   concept of the challenge coin are you [TS]

00:41:14   familiar with the challenge coin [TS]

00:41:16   challenge coin different outfits have a [TS]

00:41:18   coin that represents them and they can [TS]

00:41:20   trade them with others and it's thing [TS]

00:41:22   right yeah right i think it started with [TS]

00:41:24   an emblematic of your group started with [TS]

00:41:26   the seals and if you if you if you met [TS]

00:41:29   somebody to borrow your like you know [TS]

00:41:31   I'm seal or whatever and you couldn't [TS]

00:41:33   produce the challenge coin then they [TS]

00:41:34   would give you a swirly Oh or worse some [TS]

00:41:38   kind of stealing six World SEAL Team six [TS]

00:41:41   Worley which is designing not based on [TS]

00:41:44   their audience reaction i fear that you [TS]

00:41:45   do not know what swirlies are well I [TS]

00:41:48   think these guys have had since haha IC [TS]

00:41:52   chocolate swirly IC lemons swirly they [TS]

00:41:56   were just having a trigger problem right [TS]

00:41:57   there they're like oh really well you [TS]

00:42:01   always have a trigger warning for [TS]

00:42:03   restrooms God will be in junior high [TS]

00:42:06   anymore [TS]

00:42:07   uh so anyway Lynch coin challenge coins [TS]

00:42:10   have now proliferated in the military [TS]

00:42:13   everybody's got one although it seemed [TS]

00:42:15   like only officers at who [TS]

00:42:17   but every time I went to shake hands [TS]

00:42:19   with some kind commanding officer there [TS]

00:42:22   was a coin in his hand that was meant [TS]

00:42:25   for me [TS]

00:42:25   you're like Thank You commander for [TS]

00:42:28   having us on the base whoa think they [TS]

00:42:30   give them away to be they will they give [TS]

00:42:32   them away to special friends [TS]

00:42:33   so for instance a part of me that was a [TS]

00:42:36   sorry bad ring so i would say i'd be [TS]

00:42:38   like hello nice to meet you and then no [TS]

00:42:42   you gotta shake the hand well we're [TS]

00:42:43   going home [TS]

00:42:44   I don't know her then you feel the bond [TS]

00:42:46   of the coin or something [TS]

00:42:47   yes Wow and then walk take the coin and [TS]

00:42:50   then they give you a look [TS]

00:42:52   just in case you missed that they just [TS]

00:42:54   handed you a coin they also give you a [TS]

00:42:57   look like i just handed you a coin so [TS]

00:43:01   you're like 10 the idea what face to [TS]

00:43:03   give him in return for that but I mean I [TS]

00:43:05   he's giving you a coin face like what [TS]

00:43:07   are you doing response is super gay no I [TS]

00:43:09   have just sort of a general gratitude [TS]

00:43:11   face that I try and wear all the time he [TS]

00:43:13   shot just sort of like but might I [TS]

00:43:18   totally get thank you for your challenge [TS]

00:43:20   coin general ji gratitude coin also [TS]

00:43:22   expresses my reluctance to feel [TS]

00:43:24   gratitude [TS]

00:43:25   so I can only see how I I didn't have [TS]

00:43:29   anything for you and so right exactly [TS]

00:43:31   that was another I was like how indebted [TS]

00:43:33   MIT you now but now so now because i [TS]

00:43:36   went on this tour of various military [TS]

00:43:38   bases i have us a collection of these [TS]

00:43:40   coins some of which are the size of [TS]

00:43:42   eisenhower dollars and they're all they [TS]

00:43:45   all have lots of colors on them and Bend [TS]

00:43:48   and Dragons and demons and people [TS]

00:43:51   holding pitchforks and like death from [TS]

00:43:52   above and all this stuff even lucky to [TS]

00:43:54   even the guys that then the you know [TS]

00:43:56   like the cooks master whatever the night [TS]

00:43:58   that from above like salsbury steak from [TS]

00:44:00   above and so I have all these things and [TS]

00:44:04   then I realized that this is a whole [TS]

00:44:05   other on a shingle happen [TS]

00:44:06   this is a whole culture right and your [TS]

00:44:08   men to come that and and the CIA has [TS]

00:44:11   them and everybody in the government has [TS]

00:44:14   challenged called a terrible idea i know [TS]

00:44:15   when if somebody slips you there like [TS]

00:44:17   thanks for you know thanks for many that [TS]

00:44:19   advertises yeah like you're here [TS]

00:44:21   oh shit oh you're in the CIA old Hawk I [TS]

00:44:24   shouldn't be better if anything for you [TS]

00:44:25   but so now i have these challenge coins [TS]

00:44:28   and I was like I you know these are like [TS]

00:44:30   important to people and I feel like this [TS]

00:44:32   would be the type of thing that was [TS]

00:44:34   important to me if it didn't feel a [TS]

00:44:37   little perfunctory and the pump turi [TS]

00:44:42   nature of it you know a couple of them [TS]

00:44:44   just said like commanding officer was [TS]

00:44:48   like did you get this in one of those [TS]

00:44:50   games where the robot arm comes and [TS]

00:44:53   you were looking for at nrt McPhee thing [TS]

00:44:55   that right get for a kids party ending [TS]

00:44:57   officer one gross and challenge cause I [TS]

00:45:00   get your name honored at least or [TS]

00:45:01   something [TS]

00:45:02   yeah so I came back and I have this [TS]

00:45:04   little bag of coins that was actually [TS]

00:45:05   pretty substantial coins and I was like [TS]

00:45:08   you know daughter [TS]

00:45:10   hello daughter nice to see you here's [TS]

00:45:13   some money [TS]

00:45:14   I brought you and she was pretty into it [TS]

00:45:17   until she started to see all the like [TS]

00:45:19   flaming skull heads on them and I was [TS]

00:45:22   like never forget you know what your [TS]

00:45:27   father had to do to get the stuff that's [TS]

00:45:30   right [TS]

00:45:30   unhooks false and pick up every morning [TS]

00:45:33   remember to thank me for my service if [TS]

00:45:37   you are we're going to make your own [TS]

00:45:38   challenge going to have a sense of what [TS]

00:45:40   the design might be what my challenge [TS]

00:45:42   going well you know if it's it could be [TS]

00:45:44   for your vocation it just could be for [TS]

00:45:46   your aspirations but it'd be kind of [TS]

00:45:48   cool and super creepy if when you met [TS]

00:45:51   people you handed them a coin they [TS]

00:45:52   didn't ask for i feel like i only put it [TS]

00:45:55   on them but then give you the gratitude [TS]

00:45:56   face fucking I feel like mine would have [TS]

00:45:58   a raven on one side kind of giving you [TS]

00:46:01   the hairy eyeball and then a GMC RV on [TS]

00:46:05   the other side also giving you the area [TS]

00:46:08   and just you have to figure out what [TS]

00:46:10   that meant I like a coin you gotta [TS]

00:46:13   figure out that's a good idea alright [TS]

00:46:14   are calling that you take back to your [TS]

00:46:16   room and you you take out a typo [TS]

00:46:18   understand just said cousins little to [TS]

00:46:20   deliver a type of work from some very [TS]

00:46:22   conflicting information on it yeah weird [TS]

00:46:24   spell wi ER d uh you know the every [TS]

00:46:30   night [TS]

00:46:31   Roderick challenge going when I'm [TS]

00:46:34   traveling with my passport [TS]

00:46:35   every night I can't help ya i go back to [TS]

00:46:38   my room and look at all the stamps on my [TS]

00:46:39   passport he kept traveling with your [TS]

00:46:42   passport right in [TS]

00:46:43   did you bring your passport just two [TS]

00:46:46   come to this part of san francisco [TS]

00:46:48   like well I'm leaving the sunset I [TS]

00:46:51   better bring my passport let me see it [TS]

00:46:54   oh I can't see you oh yeah I guess so [TS]

00:46:57   what I want to do in portland I didn't [TS]

00:47:00   get your question if you gotta run the [TS]

00:47:01   fuck out of the country where do you [TS]

00:47:03   want your passport isn't home then once [TS]

00:47:05   that deposit but it's in the middle of [TS]

00:47:07   all know it's by your ass and you're [TS]

00:47:11   running toward the door I guess you know [TS]

00:47:13   carriers all this is the ultimate a [TS]

00:47:14   small bag [TS]

00:47:16   yes read the front page read the overly [TS]

00:47:19   well you know I mean or do you know what [TS]

00:47:21   it says not that whoa hello Charles [TS]

00:47:24   Nelson Reilly pig has taken prednisone [TS]

00:47:25   boom huh [TS]

00:47:29   shoot the camera over here what does it [TS]

00:47:31   say listen everybody else but the [TS]

00:47:33   incaviligia lot of water with the blood [TS]

00:47:35   talking about this on maybe Bionic there [TS]

00:47:36   with the different things that are [TS]

00:47:37   inside of the passports the Secretary of [TS]

00:47:40   State you got a little drunk media [TS]

00:47:42   secretary of state of the United States [TS]

00:47:44   of America hereby request all whom it [TS]

00:47:46   may concern to permit the citizen / [TS]

00:47:49   national start a little Patriot song [TS]

00:47:51   pointed yeah dude don't forget a [TS]

00:47:55   periodic using it seemed like you mean [TS]

00:47:58   it [TS]

00:47:58   you have to be a little drunk and also [TS]

00:48:00   be Andrew Jackson but I don't care for [TS]

00:48:04   Native American old hickory that called [TS]

00:48:08   me [TS]

00:48:08   yeah world's first andrew jackson [TS]

00:48:12   reenactor I'm not know don't get me [TS]

00:48:15   wrong I'm not personally acquainted with [TS]

00:48:20   the history miss Jackson my accent tends [TS]

00:48:23   to change every 12 to 17 minutes to [TS]

00:48:27   bruin Thailand to be about time to [TS]

00:48:31   tiptoe well Tyler to tyler perry's [TS]

00:48:34   tippecanoe request all who may concern [TS]

00:48:38   to permit the citizens / national United [TS]

00:48:41   States named herein to pass without [TS]

00:48:43   delay or hindrance and in case of need [TS]

00:48:46   to give all lawful aid and protection [TS]

00:48:49   also all fucking bag [TS]

00:48:52   Hey look at that no no let me show you [TS]

00:48:55   what let me show you some shit that you [TS]

00:48:57   need to know oh look at that [TS]

00:48:58   that's right we have the same wallet [TS]

00:48:59   because I gave your mom then she gave it [TS]

00:49:01   to you yeah I don't remember buying his [TS]

00:49:04   mother a wallet and gave my mom a men's [TS]

00:49:06   wallet as a as a thank you gift I got [TS]

00:49:09   her some driving gloves a crop and weird [TS]

00:49:14   i don't remember them and she was like [TS]

00:49:15   all right thing i want i said i don't [TS]

00:49:17   know what to do with this and I'll take [TS]

00:49:18   it and now I've had it for years and [TS]

00:49:20   look at this [TS]

00:49:21   Oh wonder twin powers activate shape of [TS]

00:49:25   a nice monkey i love you anyway you [TS]

00:49:29   carry around your passport [TS]

00:49:31   yeah I carry around these items what [TS]

00:49:36   with the state of washington state of [TS]

00:49:38   Washington offers this is not flattering [TS]

00:49:40   John know that is that what it's not [TS]

00:49:42   meant to be flattering it's meant to be [TS]

00:49:44   intimidating i want police when they [TS]

00:49:47   look at my driver's license to be scared [TS]

00:49:49   work in a cafeteria at the State [TS]

00:49:51   Department it's not a cafeteria in the [TS]

00:49:54   studio there's not a gluten-free option [TS]

00:49:56   this this picture says to any police [TS]

00:50:00   officer in the United States I know your [TS]

00:50:02   boss Nick compare now [TS]

00:50:06   yes it is intimidating corrected nick [TS]

00:50:12   says intimidating yes [TS]

00:50:13   this says this says go ahead give me a [TS]

00:50:16   ticket right go ahead and also give a [TS]

00:50:18   ticket to the bags under my eyes [TS]

00:50:20   go ahead go ahead give me a ticket I'm [TS]

00:50:22   and I have your badge number memorized [TS]

00:50:24   and then this this is troubling but [TS]

00:50:27   anyway this is a state of Washington I [TS]

00:50:29   get Ghost which actually has passport [TS]

00:50:32   information on the back it's called an [TS]

00:50:33   enhanced driver's license and it allows [TS]

00:50:36   you to travel out of the United States [TS]

00:50:37   by any land or sea border without a [TS]

00:50:40   passport [TS]

00:50:41   alright so when it's time for me to bail [TS]

00:50:44   I'm not standing around holding my [TS]

00:50:46   fucking pants or nah [TS]

00:50:49   oh I'm waiting in line at the airport I [TS]

00:50:52   have a muni clipper card with iron man [TS]

00:50:56   on it with that which if you have seven [TS]

00:51:03   hours to square can get you to the [TS]

00:51:05   oakland airport haha family with [TS]

00:51:09   anything now focus your partner my [TS]

00:51:13   daughter's the captain america one [TS]

00:51:14   that's can't i'm really glad that you [TS]

00:51:17   have your written and raised your kids [TS]

00:51:19   to like all the things that you like it [TS]

00:51:23   because it is true it's really tricky a [TS]

00:51:32   fan of Wilberforce she likes Wilberforce [TS]

00:51:34   and all the Marvel characters and she [TS]

00:51:36   likes to hook them shock but not as for [TS]

00:51:40   work you know I hear you dropping [TS]

00:51:44   references from time to time you talked [TS]

00:51:45   about storm on a podcast together didn't [TS]

00:51:47   know I'm an American [TS]

00:51:49   yeah it's not that I don't know what [TS]

00:51:51   happens in comic books yes when I got [TS]

00:51:53   off the airplane here in san francisco i [TS]

00:51:55   was walking through the terminal there [TS]

00:51:57   was a very well-dressed 52 year old [TS]

00:52:00   black guy in like great close everybody [TS]

00:52:03   in the san francisco airport has great [TS]

00:52:04   clothes on this guy was like really put [TS]

00:52:06   together my environment admiring his his [TS]

00:52:09   glasses I'm admiring the cut of his jib [TS]

00:52:11   and I look down in his lap is full of [TS]

00:52:15   graphic novels this and he is reading [TS]

00:52:18   some graphic novel about some ghost girl [TS]

00:52:20   because that's what they're all about [TS]

00:52:24   every graphic novel is about some ghost [TS]

00:52:27   girl and I was like sir you are a grown [TS]

00:52:33   person stopped reading comic books and [TS]

00:52:36   then then he was like I'm a billionaire [TS]

00:52:38   I can do what I want I could have you [TS]

00:52:42   acquired I could have you actually hired [TS]

00:52:45   by the time you get your fancy boy [TS]

00:52:47   shoeshine I live in San Francisco where [TS]

00:52:49   all billionaires now okay [TS]

00:52:51   oh wow somebody made a horse sound oh [TS]

00:52:56   it's not just a billionaire that brought [TS]

00:52:57   his horse to the show I bring a [TS]

00:53:00   different horse to every show haven't [TS]

00:53:02   killed in the end I don't need the horse [TS]

00:53:05   horse didn't need the show next issue i [TS]

00:53:10   work at Google I take my horse on the [TS]

00:53:12   bus [TS]

00:53:13   oh I ride my horse out of the elevator [TS]

00:53:19   into the bus could be could be like a [TS]

00:53:21   special-needs horse like it helps you [TS]

00:53:23   feel anxiety is the redhorse yeah right [TS]

00:53:25   so if you just hate just get on all [TS]

00:53:27   fours and you like you're checking your [TS]

00:53:28   phone and just like with your phone and [TS]

00:53:30   like a fucking Clydesdale it's a it's [TS]

00:53:34   it's broken it's for anxiety [TS]

00:53:37   it's your anxiety horse um actually it's [TS]

00:53:39   a prescription horse have a card for it [TS]

00:53:43   it has it [TS]

00:53:44   yeah it has a blanket that you've [TS]

00:53:46   scrawled in sharpie like the surface [TS]

00:53:48   force don't let me caution you don't get [TS]

00:53:51   me and I'm a service orbit you know what [TS]

00:53:54   every horse that's what it's there for [TS]

00:53:56   that's the whole body horses service or [TS]

00:53:58   whether there's some horses that are [TS]

00:53:59   just like free you mean just like at [TS]

00:54:04   liberty horses yeah just free horses i [TS]

00:54:05   mean i guess there are wild palominos [TS]

00:54:07   right but of course they're just picking [TS]

00:54:09   up work where they can I wandering [TS]

00:54:11   through town drinking cheap coffee just [TS]

00:54:13   like a jobber like a what's up Nate [TS]

00:54:15   horse I thought they'd be different for [TS]

00:54:16   me [TS]

00:54:17   anybody horse in fact i was at 14 [TS]

00:54:19   mission and i think i saw horse that was [TS]

00:54:20   just like me towards new horse in town [TS]

00:54:22   yeah he just comes to town to get some [TS]

00:54:24   it gets on bart gets on horse part it [TS]

00:54:27   pulls into the station i was told when [TS]

00:54:30   you when you walk down mission do not [TS]

00:54:32   look did not make eye contact with any [TS]

00:54:34   horse that's just trying to talk to no [TS]

00:54:36   no now that do a three course [TS]

00:54:38   money here and watch that I don't know [TS]

00:54:40   their second horsey horse paperback [TS]

00:54:44   Horst Wessel while horse vessel eating [TS]

00:54:46   he sure did [TS]

00:54:47   yes yeah that was bad got close to [TS]

00:54:53   Hitler got real good lately attention [TS]

00:54:56   generation supertrain we have an [TS]

00:54:58   exciting new thought technology for you [TS]

00:55:01   because right now for the first time [TS]

00:55:02   ever [TS]

00:55:03   Roderick on the line has shirts shirts [TS]

00:55:06   that you can buy and then where these [TS]

00:55:08   are small batch single cask artists anal [TS]

00:55:11   t-shirts and hoodies featuring our [TS]

00:55:13   brand-new Roderick on the wine logo [TS]

00:55:15   lovingly crafted by our pals at cotton [TS]

00:55:17   bureau to see them for yourself you can [TS]

00:55:19   find a link shown us for this episode or [TS]

00:55:22   just dial up bit ly / supertrain shirt [TS]

00:55:26   here's the thing this is a very limited [TS]

00:55:28   time offer the last possible second to [TS]

00:55:31   buy this shirt passes on februari 6 2015 [TS]

00:55:34   at 2pm so please act now go to italy / [TS]

00:55:39   supertrain shirt and pick up this [TS]

00:55:41   one-of-a-kind item for the very first [TS]

00:55:43   time available to you John and I thank [TS]

00:55:45   you in advance for having a torso and [TS]

00:55:48   excellent taste [TS]

00:55:49   I'm not against i'm not against i'm not [TS]

00:55:53   against horses are sweet my daughter [TS]

00:55:57   would probably have a horse if she could [TS]

00:55:58   course every daughter would have a horse [TS]

00:56:00   of course because because horses are [TS]

00:56:04   like a sex totem for girls [TS]

00:56:07   yeah we're girls represent Sigmund Freud [TS]

00:56:10   yeah but yes it's not it's not that it's [TS]

00:56:12   a prosthesis for Sigmund Freud forward [TS]

00:56:14   to Freud process strapon Froy yeah they [TS]

00:56:18   love horses [TS]

00:56:19   I find them how many people a lot of [TS]

00:56:20   people do kind of use me as a fried [TS]

00:56:23   prawns see because you're means are [TS]

00:56:27   unsound you haven't aged well limited [TS]

00:56:29   know because I look like I look like [TS]

00:56:33   Freud if Freud was hit with The Dig Dug [TS]

00:56:36   pump couple of times [TS]

00:56:38   I like will wake up wake up [TS]

00:56:43   whoa and then but then you get away [TS]

00:56:45   right well in food in my back and I [TS]

00:56:48   believe I footage yeah and that's rides [TS]

00:56:52   happen [TS]

00:56:53   you're just using you just paralyzing [TS]

00:56:56   the fried so you can keep digging [TS]

00:56:57   tunnels [TS]

00:56:57   yeah that's a penis yeah that would be [TS]

00:57:01   super weird because of what they look [TS]

00:57:03   like big dogs what you said one time I [TS]

00:57:06   was at the Tastee Freez yeah 1989 chili [TS]

00:57:09   dog I was not I have never I like a [TS]

00:57:12   chili dog never sucked on one I have [TS]

00:57:14   never seen anyone stuck in a chili dog [TS]

00:57:16   and have never had learned because [TS]

00:57:18   something you didn't write a song i [TS]

00:57:19   think that fucking ding-a-lings wrote [TS]

00:57:21   those lyrics because he thought I don't [TS]

00:57:22   know what caused the Indiana but anyway [TS]

00:57:25   Tastee Freez i was at the Tastee Freez [TS]

00:57:27   and it was early in the eighties and the [TS]

00:57:29   guy was playing dig dug and he was a guy [TS]

00:57:31   that like was wearing his hat is [TS]

00:57:33   baseball hat on backwards he had a [TS]

00:57:34   toucan in there he was like he was he [TS]

00:57:37   was like one of the tough kids he was [TS]

00:57:38   like the kid in Bad News Bears the road [TS]

00:57:40   motorcycle check your Haley that's right [TS]

00:57:43   jack your land your shock and watchmen [TS]

00:57:45   and remember and remember and and he's [TS]

00:57:50   playing dig dug and dig dugs you know [TS]

00:57:52   got a little song that happens while [TS]

00:57:54   he's diggin love theme from doing down [TS]

00:57:57   there anybody know the theme from big [TS]

00:57:58   Doug no no no you know it's not [TS]

00:58:01   hysterical laughter it's some kind of [TS]

00:58:05   little song that happens and it changes [TS]

00:58:07   with a walk with what changes as he digs [TS]

00:58:09   and different things when he's pumping [TS]

00:58:11   up dragons the difference change song [TS]

00:58:13   changes and i'm watching the game and [TS]

00:58:15   I'm you know and this is the thing that [TS]

00:58:16   we used to do in the eighties which is [TS]

00:58:18   sit and watch somebody play a video game [TS]

00:58:19   for hours just like yeah yeah go go and [TS]

00:58:22   you can afford it I couldn't play video [TS]

00:58:24   games its cost a whole quarter [TS]

00:58:25   ridiculous you could buy five mini [TS]

00:58:28   hershey kisses for are many reasons [TS]

00:58:31   pieces no not pieces reeses cups [TS]

00:58:34   yeah boy this is really this 112th one [TS]

00:58:36   of the most amazing stories I've ever [TS]

00:58:37   told but [TS]

00:58:39   so I'm said i'm watching this kid play [TS]

00:58:42   let me unwind and nail for kidding about [TS]

00:58:47   the equivalency of entertainment to a [TS]

00:58:50   young man in the early and I so i'm [TS]

00:58:53   watching this guy play i'm sitting I've [TS]

00:58:54   been sitting here for 45 minutes and [TS]

00:58:56   this is not a guy that would give me the [TS]

00:58:57   time of day normally but i'm ben i get [TS]

00:59:00   to be proximate to him because i'm [TS]

00:59:02   watching him play dig dug and a certain [TS]

00:59:04   point I go you know you could probably [TS]

00:59:06   like the way a song if you just dig dug [TS]

00:59:13   in the room in the right order [TS]

00:59:16   you could like make it into a song [TS]

00:59:17   because the music changes and it was the [TS]

00:59:22   first time that I ever felt that feeling [TS]

00:59:25   of like walking into a Western bar [TS]

00:59:28   wearing it like it really dude costume [TS]

00:59:32   and all this all the Cowboys just turned [TS]

00:59:36   their heads real slowly New York's [TS]

00:59:39   anything happen and it looked me up and [TS]

00:59:42   down and then went back to what they [TS]

00:59:45   were doing i was just no boy and I just [TS]

00:59:48   slunk and respond on at all no not him [TS]

00:59:52   and not that not his acolytes and not [TS]

00:59:54   his like little henchmen like everybody [TS]

00:59:57   just turn real slowly and there are only [TS]

00:59:59   [TS]

01:00:00   so I don't know where they learn that [TS]

01:00:01   move i think it was just instinctively [TS]

01:00:02   was like that's rough and I knew right [TS]

01:00:07   then that I was not made for this world [TS]

01:00:09   i can brutal see that's how I that's how [TS]

01:00:14   I became Who I am today [TS]

01:00:16   yeah someone who is prepared to fight [TS]

01:00:18   for justice [TS]

01:00:19   yeah in every word indeed especially [TS]

01:00:23   justice for me the most important kind [TS]

01:00:27   of Justice happen a lot of people [TS]

01:00:30   mm so uh so how was the fact that it [TS]

01:00:37   gives some texts [TS]

01:00:39   yeah haha pretty good shower so that we [TS]

01:00:44   can avoid a couple topic i really i [TS]

01:00:48   really want to ask questions of the [TS]

01:00:50   audience but I'm afraid to break the [TS]

01:00:53   fourth wall because we're whenever i do [TS]

01:00:55   that on the program I get angry emails [TS]

01:00:57   now with picture of the fourth wall [TS]

01:00:59   that's fine we don't have an audience [TS]

01:01:00   Mike but I can give him mine [TS]

01:01:02   oh I mean I don't feel like I felt like [TS]

01:01:03   I want to do it like so much that I want [TS]

01:01:05   to do [TS]

01:01:06   yeah right but what it's like it's like [TS]

01:01:07   it's like doing a song based on dig dug [TS]

01:01:09   you did good dick tip as they make their [TS]

01:01:13   kids at his name [TS]

01:01:13   yeah if chicken tikka tikka when you [TS]

01:01:15   inflate the Freud haha dick good on me [TS]

01:01:23   have some times didn't we [TS]

01:01:25   um yeah it's a it's funny because when [TS]

01:01:27   we do this program over the phone you [TS]

01:01:30   usually have to go to the bathroom by [TS]

01:01:32   this point and you like ring the bell on [TS]

01:01:35   me [TS]

01:01:35   totally yeah well I literally peed [TS]

01:01:36   myself twice we can I i'm glad i had a [TS]

01:01:39   quickie they're finally just so you guys [TS]

01:01:40   know can I say something real quick of [TS]

01:01:43   the building no I totally did not do [TS]

01:01:44   that to the bathroom [TS]

01:01:47   i feel like i don't i should i should [TS]

01:01:51   not have to say this but i I've been in [TS]

01:01:54   the bathroom twice [TS]

01:01:55   someone is really in the bathroom and it [TS]

01:01:56   was not me it seemed like me I walked [TS]

01:01:59   out and it the bathroom was bad and the [TS]

01:02:01   toilet was running he came up to the [TS]

01:02:04   dressing room [TS]

01:02:05   super anxious that someone in the [TS]

01:02:06   audience was gonna blame him for syncing [TS]

01:02:08   up about it and I was like is that not a [TS]

01:02:11   point of personal pride for all men if [TS]

01:02:13   it well if it had been me [TS]

01:02:15   yeah I would have done a little [TS]

01:02:16   differently but if that had been me I [TS]

01:02:19   would have been out front and fucking [TS]

01:02:20   brochures and offering that like take my [TS]

01:02:22   picture like this is this is bad this [TS]

01:02:25   boat has flipped in here like something [TS]

01:02:28   terrible and unnatural has happened in [TS]

01:02:30   here right before we took the stage I [TS]

01:02:32   felt like there was a distinct [TS]

01:02:34   possibility that i would be crop dusting [TS]

01:02:36   the show the entire time but since I've [TS]

01:02:38   been sitting here I've been a complete [TS]

01:02:40   person and I haven't lost any nothing's [TS]

01:02:42   good nothing's gonna put some coffee in [TS]

01:02:44   and yeah things going out so I'm good so [TS]

01:02:47   I feel like I'm only good i'm only [TS]

01:02:48   growing you wanna give people an [TS]

01:02:49   opportunity we got a few minutes right [TS]

01:02:51   people the opportunity to say things you [TS]

01:02:53   could visit with them they can talk with [TS]

01:02:55   you which is that is that something that [TS]

01:02:56   you would like like when people in the [TS]

01:02:58   audience is you haven't come up to that [TS]

01:03:00   those of you who have been listening [TS]

01:03:02   this program for a long time and I've [TS]

01:03:03   had very little opportunity to [TS]

01:03:04   contribute your own that is by design [TS]

01:03:07   and unfortunately in this setting only [TS]

01:03:12   the boldest are going to risk doing this [TS]

01:03:16   and that bodes ill yeah [TS]

01:03:18   oh you're right right only the whole we [TS]

01:03:21   should have combined people yeah and so [TS]

01:03:22   they're usually like having having hello [TS]

01:03:24   mrs. easy dr. Roderick the pair o [TS]

01:03:29   without deference and respect but yeah [TS]

01:03:32   baby why don't we try we try to call up [TS]

01:03:34   by Jason thing first no no okay Jason is [TS]

01:03:37   in the audience that at least he was [TS]

01:03:39   here Jason [TS]

01:03:41   haha do you want to do you want to you [TS]

01:03:46   you said before the show that you [TS]

01:03:47   thought you might have called the show [TS]

01:03:48   in some way [TS]

01:03:50   alright okay thanks Jason [TS]

01:03:56   oh thanks man thanks Ted what would you [TS]

01:03:59   invest in the program all that is wow [TS]

01:04:03   you know what I'm just glad i have room [TS]

01:04:05   to grow [TS]

01:04:05   haha you know Merlin Merlin sometimes to [TS]

01:04:08   adopt a supporting role and other times [TS]

01:04:10   he's more of a you know more of a leader [TS]

01:04:12   in a challenge thank you John [TS]

01:04:13   yeah haha let's take let's take some [TS]

01:04:18   questions what do you think i would say [TS]

01:04:19   anything questions for John and [TS]

01:04:21   gentlemen when the teacher I know I know [TS]

01:04:25   Matt's here have a lot of questions so [TS]

01:04:27   I'm not gonna walk out you don't pretend [TS]

01:04:29   they come on up come on [TS]

01:04:30   I what's your name I've been everybody [TS]

01:04:34   going down i have a question when you [TS]

01:04:36   were at sea for a couple years ago you [TS]

01:04:39   mentioned having some sort of bizarre [TS]

01:04:41   acupuncture experience oh yes [TS]

01:04:44   yeah by your hair I recognize you as an [TS]

01:04:46   actual computer acupuncture extra [TS]

01:04:48   puncture Asher Astrakhan surest so it's [TS]

01:04:51   actually I was wondering if you had any [TS]

01:04:53   other similar experiences you talk about [TS]

01:04:55   spiritual experience [TS]

01:04:56   maybe but they might be drug-related [TS]

01:04:58   physio spiritual drug experiences you [TS]

01:05:01   can Co pseudo struck spiritual drug [TS]

01:05:04   spirituals I've had or are you know a [TS]

01:05:08   key and needles or direct to write [TS]

01:05:10   oh wait a minute hold on that's a great [TS]

01:05:12   question how do you want to follow up [TS]

01:05:14   uh-hum I yeah I had a lot of i have i've [TS]

01:05:17   had a lot of spiritual experiences on [TS]

01:05:19   drugs [TS]

01:05:20   you said to recap here you went to an [TS]

01:05:21   acupuncturist and you have a somewhat [TS]

01:05:23   surprising experience you kind of [TS]

01:05:25   blacked out well but I wasn't wait for [TS]

01:05:28   those conscious the entire time has [TS]

01:05:29   anyone here have ever had surgery where [TS]

01:05:31   they anesthetize you but you are awake [TS]

01:05:33   through the whole process right there's [TS]

01:05:35   something that couple people it was like [TS]

01:05:38   that except i thought it was just [TS]

01:05:40   needles put into my toes or whatever and [TS]

01:05:43   I was gone I was I was I could feel all [TS]

01:05:46   of the I could feel my circulatory [TS]

01:05:49   system [TS]

01:05:50   I could feel it and I was into it it [TS]

01:05:53   wasn't a bad feeling i could feel all [TS]

01:05:55   this cool stuff circulating around I [TS]

01:05:57   could I could perceive all of my [TS]

01:05:59   capillary [TS]

01:06:00   and then I was like and then she started [TS]

01:06:03   taking the needles out and I was like [TS]

01:06:04   don't don't stop don't know I want to [TS]

01:06:06   keep doing this and she was like you've [TS]

01:06:07   been sitting there for an hour and a [TS]

01:06:08   half on time but mobile that's so insane [TS]

01:06:13   yeah and I felt like I'd been there to [TS]

01:06:14   like three minutes so you have any more [TS]

01:06:15   of this I never went back because [TS]

01:06:17   acupuncture easier quack [TS]

01:06:18   that's bullshit bullshit anybody else [TS]

01:06:23   wanna come up in you're gonna regret it [TS]

01:06:25   if you don't come up i will call you up [TS]

01:06:27   my name right here comes somebody [TS]

01:06:28   somebody the island maybe that's [TS]

01:06:30   emotional look at this handsome guy [TS]

01:06:31   yeah there you go either i'm so so okay [TS]

01:06:38   alright nerd so you guys talk about how [TS]

01:06:42   you've helped us all what's the best way [TS]

01:06:44   that we can help you directly [TS]

01:06:46   mmm best way that you can help us haha i [TS]

01:06:51   guess just keep that mouth shut with [TS]

01:06:54   people that's it just keep that if you [TS]

01:06:58   got a good point keep it to yourself [TS]

01:06:59   would be a huge one right well I just I [TS]

01:07:01   just probably not a good point i do feel [TS]

01:07:03   that there is a moment when we will be [TS]

01:07:05   called to action and I don't know when I [TS]

01:07:09   you know I saying like existential [TS]

01:07:11   volunteer fireman [TS]

01:07:12   yeah I feel like I feel like you will if [TS]

01:07:15   you have been following this program [TS]

01:07:16   long enough you will recognize the bat [TS]

01:07:18   signal when you see it [TS]

01:07:19   yeah it's going to be a bad it's not [TS]

01:07:21   gonna be a signal yet no one else will [TS]

01:07:22   recognize it but you will know that that [TS]

01:07:24   is the moment got a dog whistle [TS]

01:07:27   there's gonna be something that happens [TS]

01:07:28   you're gonna go women that's not right [TS]

01:07:30   and we gonna know it's time to go [TS]

01:07:32   yes time and so in advance of that I [TS]

01:07:34   don't want to squander our relationship [TS]

01:07:36   by asking you for some piddly you know [TS]

01:07:41   field here or have them be closer to us [TS]

01:07:43   we don't want that although although we [TS]

01:07:47   have decided tonight [TS]

01:07:49   yeah to make a lottery online as [TS]

01:07:53   insurance available and announced we got [TS]

01:07:55   a t-shirt [TS]

01:07:57   and i'm not even going to how this [TS]

01:08:02   happened in a day go to bit.ly/pda / [TS]

01:08:05   supertrain shirt you have two weeks to [TS]

01:08:08   buy the supertrain yes no no it wasn't [TS]

01:08:10   his it wasn't his it was there they were [TS]

01:08:13   finally releasing the clinch tension [TS]

01:08:15   that they've been holding the only three [TS]

01:08:17   years there was was the whoosh other [TS]

01:08:19   Windows Phone coming out of the holster [TS]

01:08:20   finally my Claymore so yeah Billy / [TS]

01:08:26   supertrain shirt yeah and so that's a [TS]

01:08:30   shirt that way that were there the first [TS]

01:08:32   mention of it that's ever happened so [TS]

01:08:34   it's very lonely been holding under [TS]

01:08:36   embargo all day so please buy it you [TS]

01:08:38   know or make somebody else finds well [TS]

01:08:39   that's something you can that's a way [TS]

01:08:40   you know we could do we could use any [TS]

01:08:43   kind of wearable wearable technology we [TS]

01:08:45   get that we have to do this after market [TS]

01:08:46   so something into it so they'll really [TS]

01:08:49   know when we need them like when the [TS]

01:08:50   time comes like one of those buzzers you [TS]

01:08:52   get at TGI Fridays that tells you your [TS]

01:08:54   tables ready to me my life behind me are [TS]

01:08:59   my life my have such mixed emotions when [TS]

01:09:02   that thing goes off I feel like why [TS]

01:09:04   aren't the why don't we so those into [TS]

01:09:06   underwear that would be and it and then [TS]

01:09:10   just be in a central location and just [TS]

01:09:12   set them off periodically it's like [TS]

01:09:14   randomly like everyone in America right [TS]

01:09:16   now you're gladiolus coming war anything [TS]

01:09:19   I mean John needs me know like now it's [TS]

01:09:23   really gotta go [TS]

01:09:24   wow I have such mixed emotions i get [TS]

01:09:26   that at the bigger the westwood yeah you [TS]

01:09:29   go and you get your tri-tip and they [TS]

01:09:30   tell your tri-tip is ready and the one [TS]

01:09:32   hand was so excited because I feel like [TS]

01:09:34   I really won the thing goes off will [TS]

01:09:37   well like outback steak alice is ready [TS]

01:09:40   to accept your money [TS]

01:09:42   don't like hey I get to go but my [TS]

01:09:44   dignity is just well and also I mean [TS]

01:09:47   using the using the Merlin Mann TV [TS]

01:09:49   remote theorem [TS]

01:09:51   yeah you can guarantee they're not [TS]

01:09:52   wiping those things down Oh doctor right [TS]

01:09:56   they just stick them right back in the [TS]

01:09:58   pile what you think happens after hours [TS]

01:10:01   there [TS]

01:10:01   I bet they have funny games they played [TS]

01:10:02   because they do what they do [TS]

01:10:05   ok you want to see what's really out [TS]

01:10:06   back but one in every pocket set of [TS]

01:10:10   rules just right all right any other [TS]

01:10:14   question man can fit one of those videos [TS]

01:10:18   dream makers but one all the way up [TS]

01:10:19   right now I know guys were yelling good [TS]

01:10:21   one really is that right [TS]

01:10:23   anybody else coming up yeah hello how [TS]

01:10:26   are you good now among many many [TS]

01:10:30   inspiring moments into the mic in the [TS]

01:10:33   microwave that many inspiring moments on [TS]

01:10:36   the podcast obviously there was a really [TS]

01:10:38   great one fairly early on where you [TS]

01:10:42   talked about sitting inside your [TS]

01:10:43   sicknesses are you Canadian I'll just go [TS]

01:10:49   just go no no it's all right you're [TS]

01:10:51   welcome [TS]

01:10:52   yes it's all right he's from ontario [TS]

01:10:55   yeah i'm not one of those and that's the [TS]

01:10:57   new young province go ahead got it [TS]

01:10:59   really is i'm a note so I just that that [TS]

01:11:02   was a really impactful moment for me and [TS]

01:11:04   I thought for any parents for any [TS]

01:11:06   potential parents and how would you go [TS]

01:11:09   about talking to your kids about those [TS]

01:11:11   moments in your life these spiritual [TS]

01:11:13   moments that we talked about earlier or [TS]

01:11:15   the moments where you have changed your [TS]

01:11:18   life significantly [TS]

01:11:20   oh it was the sitting inside your [TS]

01:11:21   sickness as you know getting sober or [TS]

01:11:23   changing who you are you know it is a [TS]

01:11:27   good question is not a funny question no [TS]

01:11:29   good job man that's a really good [TS]

01:11:31   question because it's impossible to [TS]

01:11:32   explain to a fucking kid [TS]

01:11:35   yeah but there but there is a there is a [TS]

01:11:37   there is a thing that we all need to [TS]

01:11:40   understand which is that suffering isn't [TS]

01:11:41   bad and and I try me i try to I try to [TS]

01:11:47   live that expired try to live that in [TS]

01:11:51   front of my daughter right that [TS]

01:11:53   suffering is not necessary [TS]

01:11:54   verily punishment and I think the idea [TS]

01:11:59   that suffering is punishment is this [TS]

01:12:00   judeo-christian concept that we all [TS]

01:12:03   carry around with us and every time we [TS]

01:12:05   are asked to suffer even a little bit [TS]

01:12:06   more like why am I being punished and so [TS]

01:12:09   one of the things i do with my kid is [TS]

01:12:11   that you know the only punishment she [TS]

01:12:14   ever really receives beyond being asked [TS]

01:12:17   to listen to me tell her stories which [TS]

01:12:23   is sort of a life punishment that table [TS]

01:12:25   stakes right and that's the idea but [TS]

01:12:27   there's a chair that she has to [TS]

01:12:30   sometimes sit in and have it take a [TS]

01:12:33   break in and a lot of things will result [TS]

01:12:37   in 15 minutes of sitting in the chair [TS]

01:12:38   and but from the very beginning there [TS]

01:12:42   were also times when we would just sit [TS]

01:12:44   in the chair wasn't like stigmatized it [TS]

01:12:48   wasn't like now you're going in the [TS]

01:12:50   chair but it was like you know what [TS]

01:12:51   let's go sit in the chair for 15 minutes [TS]

01:12:53   and she would sit in the chair and I [TS]

01:12:55   would sit with her and there are rules [TS]

01:12:57   about what you talk about when you're [TS]

01:12:59   sitting in the chair you can't just free [TS]

01:13:00   associate you're talking about [TS]

01:13:02   there's these rules the gym yeah there's [TS]

01:13:05   no you know if you hit you [TS]

01:13:06   we can talk while we're sitting in our [TS]

01:13:08   in our chairs we're talking about like [TS]

01:13:12   wow we're feeling why our feelings kind [TS]

01:13:15   of brought us to this moment and when [TS]

01:13:18   something's going haywire [TS]

01:13:20   it's like okay we need to go sit in the [TS]

01:13:22   chair and figure out why things are [TS]

01:13:23   going haywire and we'll talk about our [TS]

01:13:25   feelings but there are other times when [TS]

01:13:26   we just sit in the chair and talk about [TS]

01:13:27   our feelings and she's so she doesn't [TS]

01:13:29   feel that the chair is exactly a [TS]

01:13:32   punishment [TS]

01:13:33   it is just a thing and it is uncommon [TS]

01:13:36   butter bowl compared to you know like [TS]

01:13:41   throwing my little ponies around or [TS]

01:13:43   whatever it is that what she was doing [TS]

01:13:44   before but it is just uncomfortable in [TS]

01:13:48   the way that everything in life is kind [TS]

01:13:50   of uncomfortable right so that I mean [TS]

01:13:52   that's a thing that I that I try to [TS]

01:13:54   remind myself whenever I feel that my [TS]

01:13:57   discomfort as punishment is just that a [TS]

01:14:00   it's just too [TS]

01:14:01   Comfort doesn't happen there's nothing [TS]

01:14:03   attached to it that's that's hard to [TS]

01:14:05   pull off I always area that the hardest [TS]

01:14:08   part for me is taking emotion out of it [TS]

01:14:09   because usually right at the point when [TS]

01:14:11   as an empirical you know we're defending [TS]

01:14:14   this I can tell the things are going off [TS]

01:14:16   the rails [TS]

01:14:17   i'm also really fucking pissed and I [TS]

01:14:19   find those very hard to separate it [TS]

01:14:21   would be something where it's like you [TS]

01:14:22   know it's kind of louis ck thinking like [TS]

01:14:24   well the reason you can't have it is [TS]

01:14:25   because you wanted like that's that it's [TS]

01:14:27   really important that you not have this [TS]

01:14:29   thing that you want for a while so first [TS]

01:14:31   there's no crying teeth during TV you [TS]

01:14:33   don't you can't cry during TV you can't [TS]

01:14:35   cry about TV [TS]

01:14:37   you can't cry in reference to TV and TV [TS]

01:14:40   will never in a hundred and fifty [TS]

01:14:42   million fuckin years ever be provided as [TS]

01:14:44   a way to get you to stop crying because [TS]

01:14:46   I'm not stupid and so then that will [TS]

01:14:50   become so when you're done crying we can [TS]

01:14:53   watch project runway because i really [TS]

01:14:55   want to watch project runway the [TS]

01:14:57   goodwill hell yeah okay you're crying [TS]

01:14:59   about TV so now it's kinda be when you [TS]

01:15:03   stop crying [TS]

01:15:04   plus five minutes yeah I want you to [TS]

01:15:08   think about that was thinking about how [TS]

01:15:09   much longer you want to cry because they [TS]

01:15:10   were adding five minutes under that want [TS]

01:15:12   to make it 15 [TS]

01:15:13   oh that I that dries up the waterworks [TS]

01:15:16   real quick that's also something that I [TS]

01:15:17   do at any any time based timeout it's a [TS]

01:15:21   game kids love games but the time time [TS]

01:15:24   out anytime based timeout starts when [TS]

01:15:29   the crying stopped [TS]

01:15:30   oh that is so important nobody does 15 [TS]

01:15:33   minutes of time out there is whatever [TS]

01:15:34   there's no time served around where [TS]

01:15:36   they're crying for 13 minutes and then [TS]

01:15:38   they do two minutes in the chair it's [TS]

01:15:40   like now the chair begins when you are [TS]

01:15:43   like ready when you are ready to be in [TS]

01:15:46   the chair then you begin to be in the [TS]

01:15:48   chair i should explain the why also [TS]

01:15:50   dress up like cardinal richelieu when I [TS]

01:15:52   do this so it's and it's probably have a [TS]

01:15:55   riding crop and it's probably a little [TS]

01:15:57   weird i gotta have with handle i'm [TS]

01:15:59   usually dressed as Graham Chapman in his [TS]

01:16:01   like officials military guy with no [TS]

01:16:04   pants [TS]

01:16:05   mustache had no pants and socks garden [TS]

01:16:10   that's a smartlock yeah well it sure [TS]

01:16:12   keeps the door-to-door salesman at bay [TS]

01:16:14   probably gonna be oh you believe it's [TS]

01:16:20   927 already 927 how do you feel about [TS]

01:16:25   this live show but the presence of an [TS]

01:16:37   audience definitely inhibited me from [TS]

01:16:39   talking about Hitler too much really [TS]

01:16:43   I was just worried about Africa but like [TS]

01:16:45   you took off Hitler to know you're very [TS]

01:16:46   worried about Africa where a lot of ways [TS]

01:16:49   it could go wrong [TS]

01:16:52   I no no I just I i feel like i feel like [TS]

01:16:55   i have a different relationship with the [TS]

01:16:57   live audience because I that's where [TS]

01:16:59   I've spent most of my career right in [TS]

01:17:00   front of the room full of people can see [TS]

01:17:03   and it that I can't see and then I don't [TS]

01:17:04   want to see and I'd usually don't and [TS]

01:17:06   let them ask questions but but our [TS]

01:17:10   podcast is a is this other animal where [TS]

01:17:12   I'm sitting in a room often without any [TS]

01:17:14   coffee and wrapped in a robe and I'm [TS]

01:17:17   just talking into a box and on the other [TS]

01:17:19   side of the box hasn't avoid the voice [TS]

01:17:21   of Merlin name [TS]

01:17:22   yeah but more than anything I have ever [TS]

01:17:25   done [TS]

01:17:26   I cannot tell you how many people say [TS]

01:17:28   they listen to the show but they'd [TS]

01:17:29   scream back at the show more than [TS]

01:17:33   anything else that they listened to [TS]

01:17:34   because anybody yell back at the show [TS]

01:17:35   when they listen [TS]

01:17:37   really that's it CII what did possibly [TS]

01:17:40   have to yell at the show [TS]

01:17:42   and other than yes i agree directions [TS]

01:17:46   clarification yes completely right again [TS]

01:17:50   how do you get on this right so often [TS]

01:17:52   John Comstock home side it's a gift [TS]

01:17:59   are there any last questions yeah we [TS]

01:18:02   gotta move on to just got another show [TS]

01:18:04   where you going after this I'm going [TS]

01:18:05   over to cobbs comedy club to play [TS]

01:18:09   oh wait here there's a woman in ahead [TS]

01:18:11   and the do-rag okay here we go [TS]

01:18:13   he's going to who has a question has [TS]

01:18:15   karaoke club he go [TS]

01:18:17   um well first of all I just wanted to [TS]

01:18:19   thank you guys for like being just [TS]

01:18:22   slightly younger than me so like I [TS]

01:18:24   actually get all your references which [TS]

01:18:25   is it most podcast like to thank you for [TS]

01:18:28   being slightly older than yeah and also [TS]

01:18:32   on when supertrain does happen i am [TS]

01:18:34   actually an electrician so see if you [TS]

01:18:37   actually if you have skills like this [TS]

01:18:39   then that gives you it does give you a [TS]

01:18:41   leg up into um but you'll be in the back [TS]

01:18:44   of the Train of course it's fine I don't [TS]

01:18:46   care it's totally fine [TS]

01:18:48   it's totally fun but I had a question [TS]

01:18:49   but i forgot what it was really anyone [TS]

01:18:51   yet haha that was to work that was done [TS]

01:18:54   was terrific we were gonna need that [TS]

01:18:56   John we should get what get her one of [TS]

01:18:57   those Outback Steakhouse buzzers for her [TS]

01:18:59   but so and she'll know when it's time to [TS]

01:19:01   really be okay and if it breaks you can [TS]

01:19:03   fix it cuz because electrician one you [TS]

01:19:11   can show [TS]

01:19:12   shut the grid down the grid alright well [TS]

01:19:16   there's one minute left [TS]

01:19:18   is it really waiting wondering up [TS]

01:19:20   somebody's coming to the aisle [TS]

01:19:22   uh-huh again after one more [TS]

01:19:26   so real quick thank you you're welcome [TS]

01:19:28   I'm nice van Halen one shirt [TS]

01:19:30   mhm so have the two of you ever [TS]

01:19:33   considered separately or together some [TS]

01:19:36   kind of hand man related music project [TS]

01:19:38   org and also could you inhibit that [TS]

01:19:40   persona like genuinely like ironically [TS]

01:19:44   inhabit or inhibit because i'm calling [TS]

01:19:46   not inhibit any of them constantly [TS]

01:19:48   inhibiting that persona like I came out [TS]

01:19:52   inhabit because i am not a pan man but [TS]

01:19:54   there's one right next to me [TS]

01:19:57   Thank You excellent question i don't [TS]

01:20:00   have your answer haha oh yes I could [TS]

01:20:05   inhabit this shit out of that no [TS]

01:20:06   question about it you gotta tell you I [TS]

01:20:08   think the the inertia for me is really [TS]

01:20:10   toward pan man yeah I mean I'm kind of [TS]

01:20:13   from florida and i'm kinda from Ohio [TS]

01:20:15   yeah so like for me that's like it'sit's [TS]

01:20:18   like spitting or like you know yelling [TS]

01:20:21   at people [TS]

01:20:22   one of the things I realized about pan [TS]

01:20:23   here and man based music is that pan [TS]

01:20:27   music is not afraid of [TS]

01:20:30   chicka-chicka guitar right like a rock [TS]

01:20:33   and roll hoochie could like any kind of [TS]

01:20:35   pan music is gonna have a think didn't [TS]

01:20:37   think to continually to guitar happening [TS]

01:20:40   to forbidden bunk don't [TS]

01:20:42   hey your rock star get your game on two [TS]

01:20:45   day compared that's all every if you [TS]

01:20:49   think about it all panned music [TS]

01:20:50   including van Halen has a little bit of [TS]

01:20:52   like need to continually maid to clean [TS]

01:20:54   and that is a crime against humanity and [TS]

01:20:57   I can I can't embrace it but you like [TS]

01:21:02   Sloan and there's plenty of that I mean [TS]

01:21:03   that's like Canadian Pan man anyway I [TS]

01:21:06   think there's a lot of ways [TS]

01:21:09   oh it's nine-thirty we have to be show [TS]

01:21:11   has to be over up [TS]

01:21:13   everybody [TS]

01:21:18   [Applause] [TS]