Roderick on the Line

Ep. 133: "Secret Pope Songs"


00:00:00   this episode of Roderick on the line is [TS]

00:00:01   sponsored by cards against humanity two [TS]

00:00:04   people working on the cards against [TS]

00:00:05   humanity holiday puzzle they want me to [TS]

00:00:07   ask who are you and what do you do for [TS]

00:00:10   the rest of you hey just enjoy the show [TS]

00:00:12   [Music] [TS]

00:00:17   hello hi John hi Merlin has gone [TS]

00:00:22   uh pretty good pretty good pretty good [TS]

00:00:26   pretty good pretty pretty good fair to [TS]

00:00:29   Midland pretty pretty pretty pretty good [TS]

00:00:31   pretty sound good sounds like you're on [TS]

00:00:34   the mend cloud target it's really hard [TS]

00:00:37   to say you know what some I woke up this [TS]

00:00:39   morning I don't know now [TS]

00:00:41   yeah and I was sunny to brush my teeth [TS]

00:00:45   are now and then I had a couldn't tell [TS]

00:00:50   whether i was sick or not and now no now [TS]

00:00:53   we're so uh so that's where i met yeah [TS]

00:00:57   i'm having i'm having some coffee i'm [TS]

00:00:59   numb coming alive [TS]

00:01:01   yeah I've been talking to friends and I [TS]

00:01:03   mentioned this already been talking to a [TS]

00:01:05   lot of friends they all get a seven [TS]

00:01:06   o'clock in the morning she doesn't [TS]

00:01:08   matter of course that's when they get up [TS]

00:01:09   they just seven o'clock in the morning [TS]

00:01:11   they and they talk about it like you [TS]

00:01:13   know I but so I've been pulling people [TS]

00:01:14   in informal poll [TS]

00:01:16   yeah what time you get up in the morning [TS]

00:01:17   seven o'clock oh yeah I know I'm asking [TS]

00:01:19   you now what time you get up [TS]

00:01:21   uh I i wake from sleep whether I like it [TS]

00:01:25   or not at six or a little before my [TS]

00:01:28   daughter wakes up my well my wife [TS]

00:01:30   blessedly lets me sleep a little later [TS]

00:01:33   most days unless it's my drop off day [TS]

00:01:35   but left to my own devices i think i [TS]

00:01:37   would wake up at seven or 730 see see [TS]

00:01:41   people talk about this like this is [TS]

00:01:43   normal behavior got even are you also as [TS]

00:01:45   you're pulling them regarding their [TS]

00:01:47   they're going to bed time [TS]

00:01:49   yeah i mean everybody seems to go to bed [TS]

00:01:50   at eleven um I i was in a cafe today and [TS]

00:01:57   there was there were a couple of people [TS]

00:01:58   sitting across the table from one [TS]

00:02:00   another was a there's a guy sort of [TS]

00:02:01   indeterminate age probably 50 and a [TS]

00:02:04   woman about 35 baby and they both had [TS]

00:02:08   their day planners out and she was [TS]

00:02:12   saying well what about what about it you [TS]

00:02:15   know like 330 we get the ball rolling [TS]

00:02:18   and he's like great that's perfect that [TS]

00:02:20   works for me and he writes it down in [TS]

00:02:22   his day planner and she writes it down [TS]

00:02:23   under a platter and I was like [TS]

00:02:25   how yes people are fucking getting shit [TS]

00:02:28   done having efficient meetings and [TS]

00:02:30   they're deciding to accomplish things [TS]

00:02:31   look at three-thirty they're going to [TS]

00:02:33   get the ball rolling on a date in their [TS]

00:02:36   character and I bet you both of them got [TS]

00:02:38   up at seven o'clock in the morning some [TS]

00:02:41   kind of thing people get up at seven in [TS]

00:02:42   the morning to you is right now and a [TS]

00:02:43   timer [TS]

00:02:44   mhm so for me at nine-fifteen hitting [TS]

00:02:50   the snooze button again here's how i get [TS]

00:02:52   out of bed who might i wait for this for [TS]

00:02:55   years [TS]

00:02:56   yeah I wake up I throw the covers off i [TS]

00:02:59   set up [TS]

00:03:00   I recognize that the day is there and [TS]

00:03:05   then I grab the covers back and I pull [TS]

00:03:08   them back over my head and I die I go [TS]

00:03:11   back under the big burrow under the [TS]

00:03:13   pillows and hope that some through some [TS]

00:03:17   magic time will stop [TS]

00:03:20   uh-huh i could sleep forever and then [TS]

00:03:23   wake up finally fully refreshed and [TS]

00:03:26   ready to begin what will be the ultimate [TS]

00:03:29   day which is the after forever [TS]

00:03:33   ok after forever then there will be an [TS]

00:03:36   ultimate day [TS]

00:03:37   oh and that's and that's I start every [TS]

00:03:39   single day like this very masculine [TS]

00:03:41   belle and sebastian saw it does not it [TS]

00:03:43   does not happen at seven in the morning [TS]

00:03:45   uh-huh but i was i was riding in a cab [TS]

00:03:47   the other day around seven o'clock in [TS]

00:03:50   the morning and all the people are out [TS]

00:03:53   there people running I was in New York [TS]

00:03:55   there were people fishing people fishing [TS]

00:03:57   at seven in the morning they didn't get [TS]

00:03:59   up at seven okay we gotta put six or [TS]

00:04:02   five gonna have your equipment ready to [TS]

00:04:04   get your night crawlers yeah so that's [TS]

00:04:06   how i'm doing i'm thinking a lot about [TS]

00:04:08   seven o'clock in the morning right now [TS]

00:04:10   and I'm thinking about it like it's a [TS]

00:04:11   it's a it's a brand-new thought [TS]

00:04:13   technology is just it's burning it's [TS]

00:04:15   searing its brand into the haunches of [TS]

00:04:18   my mind 7am you know what i like about [TS]

00:04:25   you John Roderick is your interest in [TS]

00:04:27   infrastructure it seems to me that a lot [TS]

00:04:30   of your about technologies involve many [TS]

00:04:34   levels of infrastructure personal public [TS]

00:04:39   social municipal you're very interested [TS]

00:04:41   in how this stuff should operate my [TS]

00:04:44   wrong [TS]

00:04:45   no that's absolutely true i mean you're [TS]

00:04:47   not you're not you're very efficient in [TS]

00:04:49   a certain way which is that you're not [TS]

00:04:50   looking for the onesie twosie solutions [TS]

00:04:52   you're looking for the big ideas and [TS]

00:04:54   you're saying that this is not going to [TS]

00:04:56   change unless we change the way this [TS]

00:04:58   whole operation works okay well have [TS]

00:05:00   will have good days and bad days [TS]

00:05:01   no no we gotta figure out a much larger [TS]

00:05:03   scale and that that is it to me you're [TS]

00:05:05   interested in if you like engineering [TS]

00:05:06   and infrastructure [TS]

00:05:07   oh you're wrong no that's true that's [TS]

00:05:10   true yeah yeah this uh i've been i've [TS]

00:05:13   been toying with a new version of an old [TS]

00:05:17   thought technology be small bag em been [TS]

00:05:23   thinking a lot about the small bag and [TS]

00:05:25   with the small bag represents oh my gosh [TS]

00:05:27   thats there's a lot to the small bag [TS]

00:05:30   there's a lot of the small bag and you [TS]

00:05:31   know part of my trying to stay organized [TS]

00:05:34   and trying to keep my life together [TS]

00:05:35   involves a process of trying to figure [TS]

00:05:39   out what I need to eliminate right you [TS]

00:05:41   look around here like I got you know [TS]

00:05:43   yeah most people out there thinking how [TS]

00:05:45   do I a get a bigger bag so that i can be [TS]

00:05:48   add more stuff to it you're saying know [TS]

00:05:50   how do I make this smaller how do I make [TS]

00:05:52   this the perfect the ultimate small bag [TS]

00:05:54   right but I'm starting to think about [TS]

00:05:56   holistically across my entire life the [TS]

00:05:58   question is not what do i get rid of to [TS]

00:06:01   fit into a small bag the question is [TS]

00:06:03   what do I absolutely need and everything [TS]

00:06:08   else is just in the bin [TS]

00:06:12   uh-huh and I think if you can start [TS]

00:06:14   answering that question a lot of the [TS]

00:06:16   rest of your life starts making a lot [TS]

00:06:17   more sense but but the the problem is [TS]

00:06:20   where is my belt buckle collection fit [TS]

00:06:22   into that [TS]

00:06:23   mm that's violent that's a really has a [TS]

00:06:26   really good question right i found a big [TS]

00:06:28   tray a big wooden tray that we had [TS]

00:06:30   dividers and it would probably been used [TS]

00:06:33   as a as a typesetters tray on ice and [TS]

00:06:38   the bend the little dividers were [TS]

00:06:40   perfectly sized for belt buckles [TS]

00:06:42   and I realized i have 30 belt buckles [TS]

00:06:46   and I don't always wear a belt with a [TS]

00:06:50   buckle and when I do I kind of generally [TS]

00:06:55   stick to the old classics the Indian [TS]

00:06:57   Arrowhead the check the cover art from [TS]

00:07:01   appetite for destruction [TS]

00:07:03   then there's the one that says John I [TS]

00:07:07   left [TS]

00:07:07   that's nice if you wish to see him when [TS]

00:07:11   you become a character in a comic book I [TS]

00:07:13   i would like to see really large buckle [TS]

00:07:15   belt buckle that just says big brass [TS]

00:07:17   belt buckle justice john i have that 1i [TS]

00:07:20   have a big bear brass belt buckle it [TS]

00:07:21   just says John and I where who [TS]

00:07:23   but you know I also have a couple of [TS]

00:07:26   scrimshaw belt buckles huh i have more [TS]

00:07:29   formal affairs and I have belt buckles [TS]

00:07:31   that are enamel I have it I have an [TS]

00:07:34   Indian Head enameled belt buckle that is [TS]

00:07:37   the size of a rodeo winners belt buckle [TS]

00:07:39   but it's like enameled in six Little [TS]

00:07:43   Indians with ahead guys [TS]

00:07:44   yeah it looks like looks like an Indian [TS]

00:07:46   looks like a cigar store Indian except [TS]

00:07:49   it's it's the size of a pie plate and [TS]

00:07:50   it's a belt buckle [TS]

00:07:52   I don't know people used to live a [TS]

00:07:55   different life huh i actually have a [TS]

00:07:57   radio around a rodeo style you know tex [TS]

00:08:04   econo belt buckle polished silver plated [TS]

00:08:08   belt buckle with a giant are on it [TS]

00:08:10   let's be clear and there was a time when [TS]

00:08:12   if you want a rodeo you got a belt [TS]

00:08:15   buckle [TS]

00:08:16   oh yeah but not right like I just wanna [TS]

00:08:18   clarify for Alicia's not everybody is [TS]

00:08:19   steeped in the western addition as you [TS]

00:08:20   are or bad about what buckle is the way [TS]

00:08:23   that you you wear your trophy if you are [TS]

00:08:25   rodeo Victor and one time oh and don't [TS]

00:08:30   give you one if you please [TS]

00:08:31   yeah well maybe you get a third-place [TS]

00:08:33   belt buckle [TS]

00:08:34   you know you're different looks like [TS]

00:08:36   shit doesn't work very well you where [TS]

00:08:38   the you wear the ribbon that you that [TS]

00:08:40   you earn right you if you if you if you [TS]

00:08:42   earn a white ribbon you wear the white [TS]

00:08:44   ribbon [TS]

00:08:44   yes so I was in a i was in a bar one [TS]

00:08:46   time in the southwest and the waiter [TS]

00:08:51   was this kid who was who had a giant [TS]

00:08:55   rodeo belt buckle and I started talking [TS]

00:08:57   to me was like oh yeah I'm you know [TS]

00:08:58   rodeo champ and it i have this black [TS]

00:09:03   flash of realization that just like [TS]

00:09:06   being kind of a rock-and-roll star being [TS]

00:09:09   a rodeo champ doesn't mean that you [TS]

00:09:10   don't also sometimes have to work as a [TS]

00:09:12   waiter and he he was wearing these [TS]

00:09:15   Wranglers this was the I've gone back [TS]

00:09:19   and forth with Wranglers over the years [TS]

00:09:21   and by back and forth i mean in five [TS]

00:09:24   times in my life i have purchased it at [TS]

00:09:27   some somehow have acquired a pair of [TS]

00:09:29   Wranglers and I thought I'm gonna you [TS]

00:09:32   know I'm gonna wear wranglers regulars [TS]

00:09:33   are going to be my new thing and then I [TS]

00:09:36   put Wranglers on and they don't they're [TS]

00:09:39   just made for somebody else but it's [TS]

00:09:41   it's not a hundred percent sure i [TS]

00:09:42   thinkyeah language for me are kind of [TS]

00:09:44   like going vegan where it's not to say [TS]

00:09:47   it has never crossed my mind but as soon [TS]

00:09:49   as I spent any time with that I realize [TS]

00:09:50   it's not for me and jonathan richman has [TS]

00:09:53   a whole song about about jeans and how [TS]

00:09:55   they fit differently YG they are Ryan [TS]

00:09:58   and their lead people simply jeans right [TS]

00:10:01   yeah they do [TS]

00:10:01   absolutely i mean i don't know there's a [TS]

00:10:03   brand awareness that they used to have [TS]

00:10:05   but but there are different body types [TS]

00:10:07   and I think ladies are very aware of [TS]

00:10:08   this men we don't care how they fit they [TS]

00:10:10   just put them on unless you're you know [TS]

00:10:11   artists alike we are [TS]

00:10:12   but but now I think makes a huge [TS]

00:10:14   difference now that the Wranglers and [TS]

00:10:16   they write a little higher the other [TS]

00:10:18   high rise and I feel like Lee jeans are [TS]

00:10:20   what you wear if you are a long-distance [TS]

00:10:22   truck driver [TS]

00:10:23   ok but wrangler jeans I don't know you [TS]

00:10:28   have to be made out of you have to be [TS]

00:10:30   made out of like sticks to wear [TS]

00:10:32   wranglers but this kid this rodeo guy [TS]

00:10:35   was wearing wrangler jeans and he was [TS]

00:10:36   just like made to wear wrangler jeans [TS]

00:10:39   and he he looks so fantastic in these [TS]

00:10:42   regular jeans with this giant rodeo belt [TS]

00:10:44   buckle that i actually went out and [TS]

00:10:46   bought another this was the last time I [TS]

00:10:48   tried Wranglers I went out and bought [TS]

00:10:50   another pair of Wranglers just in homage [TS]

00:10:51   to this guy [TS]

00:10:52   uh-huh and then I put them on and i just [TS]

00:10:55   am i just looked like somebody had [TS]

00:10:57   somebody had tried to cover a crime [TS]

00:11:00   scene in denim [TS]

00:11:01   ya see I'm I feel like you're posing [TS]

00:11:06   deliberately posing a little bit your [TS]

00:11:07   question to me because I am i [TS]

00:11:09   understanding of the small bag this is [TS]

00:11:12   not purely a super train thing it's a go [TS]

00:11:14   bag for any situation think about what's [TS]

00:11:16   in think about what's in the the lockbox [TS]

00:11:20   in Switzerland right for us for Matt [TS]

00:11:22   Damon got that kind of go back stuff [TS]

00:11:24   right right right one that you can think [TS]

00:11:27   about in terms of passports and and [TS]

00:11:29   weapons and money there's the other kind [TS]

00:11:32   of go bag which is you know like if you [TS]

00:11:34   have a hurricane [TS]

00:11:35   if you have a a natural disaster do you [TS]

00:11:38   have a bag packed that you that is ready [TS]

00:11:40   and up to date that you can grab and [TS]

00:11:41   without even having to look in and I [TS]

00:11:43   think this is very important to the [TS]

00:11:44   small bag know that everything you we [TS]

00:11:47   will not everything you'll need just the [TS]

00:11:49   most essential stuff you'll need that it [TS]

00:11:51   here's the last part you've got to be [TS]

00:11:52   able to carry it [TS]

00:11:53   it's not a small bag if you can't carry [TS]

00:11:55   for what 10 miles who I mean if it's if [TS]

00:11:58   it's so it's a roller bag sorry you [TS]

00:12:00   don't know you might be in a desert and [TS]

00:12:02   need that small bag [TS]

00:12:03   well but here are the things they're [TS]

00:12:05   here are some of the factors right you [TS]

00:12:06   don't want to put everything in the bag [TS]

00:12:08   like I say this to people all the time [TS]

00:12:10   you know what they sell shampoo in [TS]

00:12:13   Europe so you don't have to bring right [TS]

00:12:16   they they have toilet paper where you're [TS]

00:12:18   going you don't have the packet unless [TS]

00:12:21   you're going someplace where they don't [TS]

00:12:22   have toilet paper makes a difference a [TS]

00:12:24   different small back everybody small bag [TS]

00:12:26   is different you should know you should [TS]

00:12:28   know and frankly I always carry toilet [TS]

00:12:31   paper [TS]

00:12:31   yeah but you know that's an experience I [TS]

00:12:34   don't want to give too much away [TS]

00:12:35   oh yeah it's dustin imodium into that [TS]

00:12:38   empty space use again with a small bag [TS]

00:12:39   as always attacking use all the [TS]

00:12:41   available space put things into the [TS]

00:12:42   whole of the tube that's right that put [TS]

00:12:45   things into the whole the tube that's [TS]

00:12:46   exactly right but also do you do you [TS]

00:12:51   bring what you need or do you bring the [TS]

00:12:52   tools to acquire what you need when you [TS]

00:12:54   get there right like in a lot of ways [TS]

00:12:58   the smallest bag is an American Express [TS]

00:13:01   black card unless the grids down unless [TS]

00:13:05   the grid is down exactly and in that [TS]

00:13:07   case can't wear you can't wear one of [TS]

00:13:09   those in that case the smallest bag [TS]

00:13:11   egg is a buck knife right like there are [TS]

00:13:15   small bags that have a buck knife in [TS]

00:13:17   them and their small bags that do not [TS]

00:13:19   what about like a leather man [TS]

00:13:21   well you know what I don't know me not [TS]

00:13:24   only the gentleman castro I mean some [TS]

00:13:26   kind of a multi-tool like a of a [TS]

00:13:28   lightweight multi-tool I go back and [TS]

00:13:31   forth on multi tools because in a way it [TS]

00:13:33   seems like jack of all trades master of [TS]

00:13:37   none [TS]

00:13:38   you got a leather man there and it's not [TS]

00:13:40   we can't really not really not actually [TS]

00:13:42   useful it's gonna be heavy [TS]

00:13:45   yeah you don't other ones are mostly [TS]

00:13:47   like a cute thing you keep in your [TS]

00:13:49   briefcase so now you got a bottle opener [TS]

00:13:50   that's what i have i have a couple [TS]

00:13:52   couple or three full-size like fancy [TS]

00:13:55   leather man knives and your tools and [TS]

00:13:58   they're the real heavy [TS]

00:14:00   i mean i-i don't notice when there's an [TS]

00:14:02   ipad in my backpack but I notice when [TS]

00:14:03   there's another man in my backpack [TS]

00:14:05   yeah I have a Swiss Army knife that was [TS]

00:14:07   made a long time ago that has in [TS]

00:14:10   addition to all the things that would [TS]

00:14:12   that you would say we're on a Swiss Army [TS]

00:14:15   knife to make somebody laugh yeah it [TS]

00:14:17   also has a magnifying glass a [TS]

00:14:19   fire-starting kit an airplane signaler a [TS]

00:14:23   wedding a mirror [TS]

00:14:26   well a mirror with the hole in the [TS]

00:14:28   middle of it so you can you can look [TS]

00:14:30   across the great distance tonight with [TS]

00:14:32   you can also hack that into a pinhole [TS]

00:14:33   camera right or you could start a fire [TS]

00:14:35   with it was another camera obscura I [TS]

00:14:37   mean get me every way to be entertained [TS]

00:14:39   later on so i have one of these things [TS]

00:14:42   but you know it's the size of a of us [TS]

00:14:44   like a like a 16 ounce can of beer and [TS]

00:14:48   and you know ultimately yeah i guess if [TS]

00:14:53   I fell out of an airplane and that thing [TS]

00:14:54   was in my coat [TS]

00:14:55   I could make it back to civilization [TS]

00:14:57   with the tools at my disposal but i'm [TS]

00:14:59   not sure that that would be the first [TS]

00:15:01   that would be my go-to kit [TS]

00:15:03   yeah I think that's heavy and bulky for [TS]

00:15:05   what you get i have like an executive [TS]

00:15:06   sighs this army knife that has a pen [TS]

00:15:08   built into it helped him it's got four [TS]

00:15:11   executives it's an executive knife [TS]

00:15:13   yeah but now I think you're absolutely [TS]

00:15:14   right i mean so I think there has to be [TS]

00:15:16   some some clothing lightweight warm [TS]

00:15:19   clothing probably for most people don't [TS]

00:15:22   you think [TS]

00:15:23   lightweight clearly that you can wash [TS]

00:15:25   out in the sink but but i'm talking [TS]

00:15:27   about something I'm talking about a [TS]

00:15:28   larger philosophical and more profound [TS]

00:15:30   small bag a more profound small bag [TS]

00:15:33   that's right which is to say like I have [TS]

00:15:35   the small bag that I grab when the [TS]

00:15:40   electromagnetic pulse turns off all the [TS]

00:15:42   microwaves [TS]

00:15:43   yeah but there's another small bag a [TS]

00:15:47   small bag that i want to but I want to [TS]

00:15:50   inhabit a small bag where instead of [TS]

00:15:54   five white shirts that all are a half [TS]

00:16:01   size too small in the neck [TS]

00:16:02   I have one white shirt that is the [TS]

00:16:05   correct size m and that is 0 quality to [TS]

00:16:14   talk about the ligand an essential [TS]

00:16:16   here's the thing this goes back to me I [TS]

00:16:17   told you about our stupid hurricane [TS]

00:16:20   earthquake kit because one year ever [TS]

00:16:22   tell you this like we got Seattle this [TS]

00:16:24   we got smart one year we're finally like [TS]

00:16:25   it takes an earthquake to make you go [TS]

00:16:27   okay we really need to get an earthquake [TS]

00:16:29   kit anything and we went totally balls [TS]

00:16:30   out we bought a really nice like like a [TS]

00:16:33   really nice garbage can start with a [TS]

00:16:35   nice garbage can because the thing is [TS]

00:16:37   with the earthquake kit don't have in [TS]

00:16:38   your house because you know what happens [TS]

00:16:39   your house falls down now you don't [TS]

00:16:41   quite get wow you have to write [TS]

00:16:42   waterproof a very like raccoon proof it [TS]

00:16:45   is much as there can be such a thing and [TS]

00:16:47   you put in there enough for sophistry [TS]

00:16:49   you put it up in a tree right right and [TS]

00:16:51   you can have a tree this earthquake [TS]

00:16:52   proof to right it's a complicated [TS]

00:16:54   maneuver you but you get eat obviously [TS]

00:16:56   you get enough [TS]

00:16:57   the basic idea is to have enough stuff [TS]

00:16:59   for however many people are in your [TS]

00:17:01   family to be able to be completely off [TS]

00:17:05   the grid and screwed for three days [TS]

00:17:07   well sounds like you need a lake house [TS]

00:17:09   that would be nice [TS]

00:17:11   yeah it's a nice learning about little [TS]

00:17:14   some lakes near here anyway do you fill [TS]

00:17:16   this with water you put in like energy [TS]

00:17:18   bars basically all the shit you would [TS]

00:17:20   never want to eat when you're at home [TS]

00:17:21   you know the stuff you donate to charity [TS]

00:17:24   you end up putting into this thing [TS]

00:17:25   here's the thing you put in there we did [TS]

00:17:27   this and we forgot about it right [TS]

00:17:29   yeah hey we're settled and then of [TS]

00:17:31   course you go out and look at it and [TS]

00:17:33   maybe that lid got off a little bit and [TS]

00:17:35   it's kind of moldy inside now [TS]

00:17:36   representations raccoons and you know [TS]

00:17:38   all the water expires because you know [TS]

00:17:40   what John water expires lecture goes you [TS]

00:17:43   know and and so you [TS]

00:17:44   that's the thing about that what I'm [TS]

00:17:45   trying to bring to this it as much as I [TS]

00:17:47   can [TS]

00:17:48   is that you don't pack a small bag once [TS]

00:17:50   you're constantly packing a small bag [TS]

00:17:53   even if it's just in your head [TS]

00:17:55   yes don't you think that's part of the [TS]

00:17:57   catalyst optical component you can sit [TS]

00:17:59   around and say like oh I'm gonna put the [TS]

00:18:01   silverware in the pistol in here but [TS]

00:18:03   like now but like what do you need now [TS]

00:18:05   yeah you're cycling a a small bag is it [TS]

00:18:08   isn't a live thing [TS]

00:18:10   yes small bag is is a is not a static [TS]

00:18:13   animal it is a it's an evolving yes [TS]

00:18:19   right a creature of friends because like [TS]

00:18:22   you think about like well okay in that [TS]

00:18:23   case in that one you know we had been [TS]

00:18:25   there a bunch of extremely tiny diapers [TS]

00:18:28   and by the time was moldy our kid didn't [TS]

00:18:29   wear diapers diapers anymore so i have [TS]

00:18:31   not kept we had not kept up if it had [TS]

00:18:34   happened in the interregnum we would [TS]

00:18:36   have a kid with some really super tiny [TS]

00:18:37   diapers right we didn't treat it like a [TS]

00:18:40   living thing [TS]

00:18:40   well and yes and you know honestly I [TS]

00:18:44   people you know people have these like [TS]

00:18:47   our organization strategies like well [TS]

00:18:49   you know turn it backwards on the hanger [TS]

00:18:51   and put a put a pin in the neck and if [TS]

00:18:53   you don't wear it in six months in six [TS]

00:18:56   months you go through and you take all [TS]

00:18:57   the things on backwards hangers out and [TS]

00:18:58   those people have day planners and get [TS]

00:19:02   up at seven in the morning or or or [TS]

00:19:03   earlier [TS]

00:19:04   yeah I try to touch every single thing [TS]

00:19:10   in my house at least once in the course [TS]

00:19:14   of a day and a half including the guests [TS]

00:19:17   i just i go through and they just number [TS]

00:19:19   put my fingers on everything all the [TS]

00:19:20   time just Pauly everything [TS]

00:19:22   are you still here are you still here [TS]

00:19:24   are you still here or where I left you [TS]

00:19:26   that's right you done good book are you [TS]

00:19:28   okay are you okay [TS]

00:19:29   like shoes are you all right are you [TS]

00:19:31   okay the shoes I'm wearing today my [TS]

00:19:33   sister gave me as a gift in 1997 [TS]

00:19:37   christmas present it was probably a big [TS]

00:19:39   investment for her and they are [TS]

00:19:44   shoes of their time right they are 1997 [TS]

00:19:48   shoes and in the in-between times [TS]

00:19:53   between now and 1997 there have been a [TS]

00:19:55   lot of shoe fashions come and go [TS]

00:19:58   pointy shoes for guys little shoes right [TS]

00:20:03   flat shoes little-little it's not shoot [TS]

00:20:07   little shoes we went through a phase [TS]

00:20:10   there were little shoes where all the [TS]

00:20:12   way now we're in a place where everybody [TS]

00:20:14   comically small yeah just like like woe [TS]

00:20:17   cometh their toes shoes for running [TS]

00:20:20   shoes club rockers we're in a phase now [TS]

00:20:24   where every single guy is wearing some [TS]

00:20:27   kind of suede wingtip in a non-canonical [TS]

00:20:30   color with a blue Sol or a yellow soul [TS]

00:20:34   tried love to see them walk in the rain [TS]

00:20:35   in this think it's very fancy time we're [TS]

00:20:38   living in right now [TS]

00:20:39   true if i had seen any one of those [TS]

00:20:41   shoes 25 years ago i would have [TS]

00:20:42   seriously flipped out but now you know I [TS]

00:20:47   get there the shoes of the time right [TS]

00:20:49   and in 10 years from now 15 years from [TS]

00:20:51   now you walk around a pair of blue wing [TS]

00:20:53   tips with yellow souls people can be [TS]

00:20:54   like other shoes from 2014 [TS]

00:20:58   she's an unsuccessful clown it's like [TS]

00:21:00   it's like the architecture that that is [TS]

00:21:02   flying up all around right now you look [TS]

00:21:05   at that you look at the the new 10-story [TS]

00:21:08   condo buildings that are going up and [TS]

00:21:10   it's just like oh that's alright already [TS]

00:21:12   looks like 2013 when it was designed [TS]

00:21:14   it's really not like the idea of comic [TS]

00:21:17   books they haven't read a lot of comic [TS]

00:21:19   books you have an idea of know they have [TS]

00:21:20   an idea of the future but it's not [TS]

00:21:22   particularly well thought-out are [TS]

00:21:23   tasteful women are there people that [TS]

00:21:26   like the idea of comic books but haven't [TS]

00:21:28   read comical cautious [TS]

00:21:30   it seems like the idea of comic books is [TS]

00:21:32   to read comic books [TS]

00:21:34   yeah well you're you're you're vibrating [TS]

00:21:36   on a different level and a lot of people [TS]

00:21:38   in any case these shoes are very much of [TS]

00:21:41   their time which is what they look like [TS]

00:21:43   John well Merlin they are black leather [TS]

00:21:46   they have very chunky souls right this [TS]

00:21:52   was the this with the chocolate soul [TS]

00:21:53   time [TS]

00:21:54   oh yes this is still the wallet chain [TS]

00:21:56   years wallet chain years chill [TS]

00:21:58   be so lucky souls tall heal but in the [TS]

00:22:01   front there kind of pale almost look [TS]

00:22:03   like Clark's right there kind of a of a [TS]

00:22:06   chunky style or like a desert boot smile [TS]

00:22:10   yeah but they're made out of like like [TS]

00:22:13   pretty thick leather almost to a sort of [TS]

00:22:15   horsehide but but the thing that sets [TS]

00:22:19   them apart is this business big chunky [TS]

00:22:21   black soul and honestly if I'm sure that [TS]

00:22:29   there are people who are of the moment [TS]

00:22:31   people out there right now walking [TS]

00:22:32   around with Macklemore haircuts and [TS]

00:22:35   handlebar mustaches who would look at [TS]

00:22:37   these chunky shoes I don't know what I [TS]

00:22:40   don't know whether they would say like [TS]

00:22:41   cool because those are retro because [TS]

00:22:44   there are from when I was five years old [TS]

00:22:46   or whether they're like so so out there [TS]

00:22:52   out but here they are and I looked at [TS]

00:22:55   him this morning and I was like well you [TS]

00:22:57   know I haven't touched you guys in a in [TS]

00:23:00   a little while right it's been a couple [TS]

00:23:02   of weeks since i put my hands on these [TS]

00:23:04   shoes and said are you are you still [TS]

00:23:05   here are you okay [TS]

00:23:07   and I put them on i'm wearing them today [TS]

00:23:08   if they feel great I feel great in them [TS]

00:23:11   but they are there in the they're kinda [TS]

00:23:18   there on the bench [TS]

00:23:19   let's say they're in there they're in [TS]

00:23:20   reserve [TS]

00:23:22   well like second string cheese yeah I'd [TS]

00:23:24   say these were third-stringers right [TS]

00:23:26   because I wore them a lot [TS]

00:23:27   all right back in the day and now [TS]

00:23:29   they're just kind of you know they put [TS]

00:23:31   that there [TS]

00:23:32   they're all the way they're not quite [TS]

00:23:33   mothballed but there but they're in the [TS]

00:23:37   they're not the definite regular [TS]

00:23:38   rotation right there in the garage yeah [TS]

00:23:40   but um but I got it I got to bring them [TS]

00:23:45   out and touch them and say you know [TS]

00:23:46   are you with me still and then we're um [TS]

00:23:49   I'm gonna spend a day or two in these [TS]

00:23:52   shoes we're gonna have a great time [TS]

00:23:53   together but ultimately the trajectory [TS]

00:23:56   of these shoes is that they are they're [TS]

00:23:59   making their way to pasture but it's [TS]

00:24:04   been spending the weekend with a [TS]

00:24:06   middle-aged child from her first [TS]

00:24:08   marriage [TS]

00:24:10   yeah I like right it's just checking in [TS]

00:24:12   and look around hey how many of these [TS]

00:24:14   weekends are we gonna have together [TS]

00:24:15   right yeah how you doing how you doing [TS]

00:24:16   right doing still did I do a good job [TS]

00:24:18   did I do a good job with you and I mean [TS]

00:24:21   from 97 96 97 to 2002 boy these shoes [TS]

00:24:25   and I had some times together but i [TS]

00:24:29   wasn't able in 2002 to say like fly be [TS]

00:24:32   free shoes off to the off to the [TS]

00:24:35   goodwill with you because you're my [TS]

00:24:36   sister gave him to me but they're not [TS]

00:24:40   eternity shoes right there not like my [TS]

00:24:42   life hat that I'm gonna have for my life [TS]

00:24:45   right you have a life hat right to I i [TS]

00:24:48   assume everybody's gotta gotta life hat [TS]

00:24:50   i was gonna let go by I don't know what [TS]

00:24:52   a life hat is or whether i have one [TS]

00:24:55   well it's a hat that when you you know [TS]

00:24:59   over time you always go to this hat when [TS]

00:25:02   it's cold [TS]

00:25:03   ok it's your it's your number one cold [TS]

00:25:05   hat and then after a while you got your [TS]

00:25:07   number one cold hat and and it starts to [TS]

00:25:09   be like well you know you start to feel [TS]

00:25:11   like what if I lose this cold had what [TS]

00:25:13   if I lose this hat i'm gonna miss it [TS]

00:25:16   this kind of has been with me for a long [TS]

00:25:17   time and then he starts to kind of put [TS]

00:25:21   the hat away a little bit like I don't [TS]

00:25:23   need to wear this at this is my good hat [TS]

00:25:25   well ya know I think I know what you [TS]

00:25:28   mean but wait then you come back you [TS]

00:25:30   come back after a little while and you [TS]

00:25:31   say because that's my hat that's my hat [TS]

00:25:35   what am i saving it for its for wearing [TS]

00:25:37   and then you bring the cold hat back at [TS]

00:25:41   you that you that you put into like [TS]

00:25:42   sentimental retirement and once you [TS]

00:25:46   bring it back you realize oh shit this [TS]

00:25:47   is my life hat [TS]

00:25:48   I'm gonna wear this hat until I'm gonna [TS]

00:25:52   wear this hat until I can no longer wear [TS]

00:25:54   this hat because i had is not a mean [TS]

00:25:57   that's a happen the cold that is not a [TS]

00:26:00   30 your life that is not a thing that [TS]

00:26:02   you're going to accidentally leave in a [TS]

00:26:04   cab right because you're cold as your [TS]

00:26:08   life hat it's your life that's right [TS]

00:26:09   when you get up to get out of a cab your [TS]

00:26:12   your your last thought is to have my [TS]

00:26:14   life huh [TS]

00:26:15   each Center leave your phone that's [TS]

00:26:17   right because you don't have a life [TS]

00:26:19   phone not your phone is just that your [TS]

00:26:21   phone is just a temporary friend and [TS]

00:26:23   it's not even that good [TS]

00:26:24   of a friend yeah it's like somebody [TS]

00:26:25   something college yeah with somebody in [TS]

00:26:28   college this like that's pretty hot that [TS]

00:26:30   maybe is a little bit little bit cooler [TS]

00:26:32   than you and you feel kind of lucky to [TS]

00:26:36   be its friend but you also resent it a [TS]

00:26:37   little bit and you don't like it you [TS]

00:26:39   don't like that friend very much [TS]

00:26:40   yeah but-but-but that friend gives you [TS]

00:26:42   an opportunity that's good for each [TS]

00:26:44   other in different ways [TS]

00:26:45   mm whoo anyway so here i am i'm in my [TS]

00:26:49   clunky shoes I got my life and I'm [TS]

00:26:51   looking at it sitting right here in [TS]

00:26:52   front of me [TS]

00:26:53   what else do I need really uh-huh [TS]

00:26:56   I mean I'm halfway to a small bag right [TS]

00:26:58   now yeah is that it is very [TS]

00:27:03   philosophical because I mean the thing [TS]

00:27:06   is here's the thing and I'm gonna make [TS]

00:27:07   this a little bit turns out i think most [TS]

00:27:09   of the stuff if you had people go and [TS]

00:27:11   especially people who don't travel a lot [TS]

00:27:12   let's say four people who don't do a [TS]

00:27:14   carry-on and you ask them to put [TS]

00:27:16   together their small bag i think by the [TS]

00:27:19   time they pack that bag for a fifth time [TS]

00:27:20   they're gonna be surprised what went in [TS]

00:27:22   the first time the first time somebody [TS]

00:27:24   that doesn't travel very much some of [TS]

00:27:25   the first time somebody starts to pack a [TS]

00:27:27   small bag first thing they put in their [TS]

00:27:28   shampoo right they start packing it with [TS]

00:27:32   a bunch of with a bunch of shit [TS]

00:27:34   a you know they're combing their [TS]

00:27:36   toothbrush in there all this stuff is [TS]

00:27:38   usually good way to put it with stuff [TS]

00:27:40   that you're likely to find in other [TS]

00:27:41   places [TS]

00:27:42   yeah stuff that you can boost from any [TS]

00:27:45   drugstore but there were a zombie like [TS]

00:27:47   my wife watches the walking dead show so [TS]

00:27:49   i end up having to watch it freaks me [TS]

00:27:51   out but I end up watching it I think you [TS]

00:27:53   can learn a lot from that show they get [TS]

00:27:55   by fine with one shirt one shirt yeah I [TS]

00:27:58   mean it's the thing is like you know how [TS]

00:28:00   many should what you're not trying to [TS]

00:28:02   recreate civilization yet [TS]

00:28:04   first you need to stay alive right right [TS]

00:28:08   well the the concept of the small bag [TS]

00:28:12   for me began in 1989 in a town called [TS]

00:28:18   every old France solar pond to having [TS]

00:28:22   you very familiar with it an adults-only [TS]

00:28:25   Donaldson I don't know that particular [TS]

00:28:28   shots on I i know there was a pope there [TS]

00:28:30   and because of paint suckers from there [TS]

00:28:33   that's right there was there was a there [TS]

00:28:34   was a panic i am I [TS]

00:28:36   refer to myself as the the X of avenue [TS]

00:28:38   and all the time and nobody ever left a [TS]

00:28:40   Christmas heart [TS]

00:28:42   its part number two or pump number one [TS]

00:28:44   depending on who you're talking to [TS]

00:28:45   I'm sure but surely you know [TS]

00:28:49   surely no soul upon daven your own a [TS]

00:28:52   Donahoe named ansa that is a song about [TS]

00:28:55   the bridge of having me on [TS]

00:28:56   ok on which we all danced which is you [TS]

00:29:01   know it's a bit since the Pope's on [TS]

00:29:03   let's be honest it's a it's about it's [TS]

00:29:05   about the pump but I like there's so [TS]

00:29:08   many secret pop songs i'm gonna write [TS]

00:29:09   that down and what a fine let's be [TS]

00:29:11   honest it's about the Pope you could do [TS]

00:29:13   you know what you could make a hell of a [TS]

00:29:15   mixtape of secret Pope some blood so [TS]

00:29:22   late one night I was on I was on a train [TS]

00:29:25   and and I i arrived in avenue old and I [TS]

00:29:32   didn't have money for a hotel I but I [TS]

00:29:36   had a backpack and the backpack had in [TS]

00:29:41   addition to you know a couple of pairs [TS]

00:29:44   of jeans and then some shirts and and a [TS]

00:29:47   tie in case I got asked to a nice dinner [TS]

00:29:50   it had a carton of camel lights it had a [TS]

00:29:53   Walkman and a banana and some cassette [TS]

00:29:56   tapes including traveling wilburys vol.2 [TS]

00:29:59   and Tom Petty's first solo album like I [TS]

00:30:05   like to think I know you and it had it [TS]

00:30:10   had a like a rain jacket made by the [TS]

00:30:13   spider skiwear company and it had some [TS]

00:30:15   picture of courtney cox it had some nike [TS]

00:30:19   lava dome boots tied to the outside of [TS]

00:30:22   it and it had a it had a hitchhiking [TS]

00:30:25   sign look at that I'd written on a piece [TS]

00:30:27   of cardboard that said anywhere you know [TS]

00:30:30   it was like this is my bag right and in [TS]

00:30:34   addition to that it had a patch sewn on [TS]

00:30:36   the back of this of the of the bag [TS]

00:30:39   this is this was my small bag concept at [TS]

00:30:41   the time and a patch on the outside [TS]

00:30:44   from from the Minnesota outward-bound [TS]

00:30:49   the voyagers outward bound and [TS]

00:30:54   underneath the patch there were three [TS]

00:30:55   100-dollar bills in a plastic little [TS]

00:30:58   haha dammit that's smart em all that's [TS]

00:31:01   late john just sewed on the patch so [TS]

00:31:03   that worse comes to worse yet music [TS]

00:31:05   stops hatch rip up the patch you got 300 [TS]

00:31:07   bucks it had a pair of yeah it had a [TS]

00:31:12   pair of sunglasses in there [TS]

00:31:14   what else did I have you know obviously [TS]

00:31:15   socks and underwear journal camera you [TS]

00:31:19   know it had this was a small bag that i [TS]

00:31:21   was living out of it had been living at [TS]

00:31:23   up for a oh well for years and the bag [TS]

00:31:26   but the backpack itself was made by the [TS]

00:31:29   company mountainsmith like I had [TS]

00:31:32   everything in this bag that a person [TS]

00:31:34   could possibly need to go around europe [TS]

00:31:40   and america and just be kind of dirty [TS]

00:31:43   all the time and shower and gas stations [TS]

00:31:47   and yet be ready for anything right and [TS]

00:31:51   and by and large hard work but didn't [TS]

00:31:53   know how to work out for you [TS]

00:31:54   it was incredible for months and months [TS]

00:31:55   and months i lived out of this bag i had [TS]

00:31:57   i bought a switchblade in Italy so I had [TS]

00:32:00   my you know a switchblade to in addition [TS]

00:32:02   to probably like the multi-tool that I [TS]

00:32:05   came with can you must really like [TS]

00:32:07   yourself then that sounds like a fun [TS]

00:32:09   time when I was I was a hot hot hot hot [TS]

00:32:12   tamale and so I get off the train avenue [TS]

00:32:17   and i'm walking around it's dark it's [TS]

00:32:19   kinda late at night I don't have money [TS]

00:32:20   for a hotel and I walk over and there's [TS]

00:32:22   this kind of park over by the you know a [TS]

00:32:24   little ways away from the train station [TS]

00:32:25   kind of over by the by the freeway [TS]

00:32:28   interchange [TS]

00:32:30   and they're like six or seven guys [TS]

00:32:32   sleeping in this park already they've [TS]

00:32:34   got their small bags are using their [TS]

00:32:35   small bags as a pillow [TS]

00:32:37   they're sleeping out in the park and I'm [TS]

00:32:39   like out here here are my people I'm [TS]

00:32:41   gonna I'm gonna pull up a piece of grass [TS]

00:32:44   in this park and catch some z's and in [TS]

00:32:48   the morning i'm gonna go figure out my [TS]

00:32:50   next move on zee palsy we so I i lay it [TS]

00:32:56   all out i gotta go I gotta have a [TS]

00:32:57   sleeping bag in the in the back and pull [TS]

00:33:00   the sleeping bag out my climb into it [TS]

00:33:02   now a lot of the guys that are sleeping [TS]

00:33:03   rough in this Park do not have sleeping [TS]

00:33:05   bags i would say them the vast majority [TS]

00:33:07   of them they're just curled up in with [TS]

00:33:09   all their clothes on and their bag as [TS]

00:33:12   their pillow but i have a sleeping bag [TS]

00:33:14   putting me in in the rare you know the [TS]

00:33:17   one percent of people sleeping in this [TS]

00:33:19   avion park my passports around my neck [TS]

00:33:26   in a little cotton a passport bag around [TS]

00:33:31   the just bag the size of my passport [TS]

00:33:33   that's around my neck and I wake up [TS]

00:33:37   about an hour later and there's a guy [TS]

00:33:41   standing over me in the dark and my bag [TS]

00:33:45   which I had been snuggling with is gone [TS]

00:33:48   oh my god and this guy's he's actually [TS]

00:33:53   straddling me one foot on either side of [TS]

00:33:55   me and he's bending over his face is [TS]

00:33:59   very close to mine [TS]

00:34:01   I think that's what woke me up the face [TS]

00:34:04   vibration many yeah you know you know [TS]

00:34:06   and there's a face nearby face [TS]

00:34:08   vibrations [TS]

00:34:09   yeah I wake up and here's this face kids [TS]

00:34:12   and I can't really see him because it's [TS]

00:34:13   very dark i'm in a park and he is [TS]

00:34:16   looking he's trying to find a way to get [TS]

00:34:19   that passport from around my neck [TS]

00:34:22   oh my gosh he is prepared to reach into [TS]

00:34:25   into my shirt and he knows that when he [TS]

00:34:28   goes for it then it's better that than [TS]

00:34:31   the fights gonna be on but he's like [TS]

00:34:33   setting himself up for this grab right [TS]

00:34:36   he's got this is and i think i think [TS]

00:34:38   what he's gonna do is he's going to cut [TS]

00:34:41   he has a knife he's going to cut the [TS]

00:34:43   wire [TS]

00:34:44   the strap and grab this thing and then [TS]

00:34:47   I'm gonna wake up and maybe I'm gonna be [TS]

00:34:50   serious because you're in a sleeping bag [TS]

00:34:51   and he's already running through a venue [TS]

00:34:52   right that's the strategy that's the [TS]

00:34:55   strategy well so i wake up [TS]

00:34:57   he's there he sees my eyes open [TS]

00:35:00   we look at each other in the dark and [TS]

00:35:03   then she starts to run and I am nothing [TS]

00:35:08   if not able to eject from a sleeping bag [TS]

00:35:12   in like a like a crossbow bolt like I [TS]

00:35:17   come out of that bag in my bare feet [TS]

00:35:19   already running at 15 miles an hour and [TS]

00:35:24   I'm right on his heels and he is he is a [TS]

00:35:29   thin guy and he's moving fast and i'm [TS]

00:35:32   right behind him and I am so I'm cursing [TS]

00:35:35   him and I chased him and chased and [TS]

00:35:39   chased him over hedges and roads and [TS]

00:35:44   streets and I'm right on his heels and [TS]

00:35:46   my feet are shredded but i'm not i don't [TS]

00:35:49   care and I feel very close to don't [TS]

00:35:56   think I'm gonna wear him down i think [TS]

00:35:57   i'm actually out of pure fury gonna [TS]

00:35:59   going to accelerate that last little bit [TS]

00:36:02   to actually take him down and he leaps [TS]

00:36:07   over a a metal railing on to the [TS]

00:36:11   actually onto the highway and I'm right [TS]

00:36:15   on his heels and my toe catches on the [TS]

00:36:17   top of the metal railing and now and it [TS]

00:36:19   sends me right down onto my face and [TS]

00:36:23   then he's and then he he he goes off [TS]

00:36:26   down the road at it at a kind of a trot [TS]

00:36:28   now he's looking over your shoulder and [TS]

00:36:30   just sort of like just a cool-down trot [TS]

00:36:33   uh-huh as I lay there just splattered on [TS]

00:36:36   that on the pavement and i limp back to [TS]

00:36:40   my campsite and everything is gone [TS]

00:36:45   oh my god because in the in the chase [TS]

00:36:49   his friend or friends chaotic as [TS]

00:36:54   accomplice his accomplice came and got [TS]

00:36:56   the sleeping bag and the [TS]

00:36:57   shoes and everything what dicks well you [TS]

00:37:01   know what's on the game it's all in the [TS]

00:37:04   game that's right and they are they by [TS]

00:37:06   you know by the e at using my powers of [TS]

00:37:13   perception and a guesstimate i would say [TS]

00:37:15   that they were Algerians and that they [TS]

00:37:19   were here in France and that they and [TS]

00:37:22   that this was part of the this was part [TS]

00:37:24   of the nature of colonialism really want [TS]

00:37:27   to get down to it this is one of I was [TS]

00:37:29   one of the victims other ones cozy and [TS]

00:37:32   his sleeping bag that's right gets his [TS]

00:37:34   comeuppance how much you lost 300 box [TS]

00:37:36   too [TS]

00:37:36   oh yes in addition to a fucking carton [TS]

00:37:40   of camel lights when even then when the [TS]

00:37:42   Cardinals won a camel and join our [TS]

00:37:44   reporter yeah that's a lot of money [TS]

00:37:46   anyway I spent a couple i spent the next [TS]

00:37:52   few days I mean the first thing I did [TS]

00:37:57   was limp over to a hotel like a like a [TS]

00:37:59   cheap blue mama mamas on Pensione type [TS]

00:38:03   of place and I said listen I don't have [TS]

00:38:07   any money and I'm covered with blood and [TS]

00:38:09   mud but I'm an American [TS]

00:38:12   how do you do nice to meet you i am able [TS]

00:38:15   to get money because I'm an American [TS]

00:38:19   well once will you let me stay in your [TS]

00:38:22   hotel tonight and i will pay you later [TS]

00:38:25   and the power at the time of being an [TS]

00:38:31   American maybe its power still exists [TS]

00:38:34   I don't think maybe it exists less now [TS]

00:38:36   but at the time that the little uh madam [TS]

00:38:41   who ran this Pensione was like yeah that [TS]

00:38:42   seems reason she got the sense that [TS]

00:38:44   you're good for it right [TS]

00:38:46   so it wasn't scared of you she respected [TS]

00:38:48   you well we're a little bit of maybe a [TS]

00:38:50   little bit of both but a little bit of [TS]

00:38:51   like right you are an American and you [TS]

00:38:54   can go down to the American Express [TS]

00:38:55   office it has American right in the [TS]

00:38:57   title and express it will be fast [TS]

00:39:00   that's right go down there and say hey [TS]

00:39:01   somebody in America send me some money [TS]

00:39:03   and that's what I did I went down to the [TS]

00:39:05   American Express office and I said send [TS]

00:39:06   me the money that i can get [TS]

00:39:08   it's been so i can pay this lady for the [TS]

00:39:10   hotel and then i spent about a week [TS]

00:39:11   scouring the garbage cans of having home [TS]

00:39:14   because I was missing my journals I [TS]

00:39:20   didn't care about the bag and care about [TS]

00:39:21   the the lava domes I didn't care about [TS]

00:39:24   the spyder jacket and I knew the carton [TS]

00:39:27   of cigarettes was gone and I never [TS]

00:39:29   expected to find anything but I thought [TS]

00:39:32   maybe that they would toss those [TS]

00:39:34   journals in a garbage can and I wanted [TS]

00:39:39   those journals and i never found them [TS]

00:39:42   but in the course of this week of [TS]

00:39:46   walking around and you know and I by got [TS]

00:39:48   some shoes [TS]

00:39:51   Adam at some you know little place [TS]

00:39:55   this was back when the dollar was strong [TS]

00:39:57   against the Frank uh-huh so I had my [TS]

00:40:00   shoes i had my shirt that i've been [TS]

00:40:03   wearing i had my pants that i've been [TS]

00:40:05   wearing and I went to one of those [TS]

00:40:11   street markets and i bought a Greek [TS]

00:40:14   fisherman sweater you know one of those [TS]

00:40:18   like Saturday markets and i think at the [TS]

00:40:21   time in Europe every saturday market had [TS]

00:40:24   a had someone sitting there selling [TS]

00:40:26   Greek sweaters because Greece was a was [TS]

00:40:31   still a poor country and knitting [TS]

00:40:33   sweaters was was that was one of the [TS]

00:40:36   things that they did for export so i [TS]

00:40:38   bought a Greek sweater and walking [TS]

00:40:42   around the town looking for my stuff [TS]

00:40:44   when I would get tired i would just kind [TS]

00:40:45   of sit down on a park bench and doze off [TS]

00:40:48   and then when i woke up i would just [TS]

00:40:50   wake up and stand up and start walking [TS]

00:40:52   and the men and the tragedy of losing [TS]

00:40:58   the bag started to fade as I realized [TS]

00:41:03   that I hadn't needed any of that stuff [TS]

00:41:06   and prior to that i thought that i was [TS]

00:41:09   at the barest minimum i thought i [TS]

00:41:11   thought i had just the minimum of what [TS]

00:41:14   you needed but now I had none of it [TS]

00:41:19   just the just these clothes and if i was [TS]

00:41:22   invited to a fancy dinner i did not have [TS]

00:41:24   a time but I was not going to get [TS]

00:41:26   invited to a fancy dinner and the [TS]

00:41:28   condition I was in but I felt for the [TS]

00:41:32   first time a kind of Liberty I had never [TS]

00:41:35   I didn't even know existed which was the [TS]

00:41:38   liberty of total possession lessness and [TS]

00:41:44   I left a me own sometime in let's say [TS]

00:41:53   August this would have been 1989 left me [TS]

00:42:01   on in august of 89 and i continued to [TS]

00:42:04   bitch I can travel and and sleep around [TS]

00:42:12   and eat and live until christmas and i [TS]

00:42:18   never replaced the bag [TS]

00:42:21   Wow or bought another item and you get [TS]

00:42:28   by okay i was i I was as free as a as a [TS]

00:42:33   man could be i would wash my clothes [TS]

00:42:35   sometimes you know in in a sink or [TS]

00:42:37   whatever and hang them up to dry that [TS]

00:42:39   got harder and harder as the winter came [TS]

00:42:41   on in the you know in the summer you [TS]

00:42:43   wash your clothes you put them on and [TS]

00:42:46   they dry as you walk around but that was [TS]

00:42:50   that was less easy to do not into the [TS]

00:42:53   safe you know you just you develop [TS]

00:42:57   calluses in the right places and you [TS]

00:42:59   develop those them inner thigh calluses [TS]

00:43:02   that all true great travelers have yeah [TS]

00:43:04   but but I've ever since them and I mean [TS]

00:43:08   honestly I must have smelled to high [TS]

00:43:10   heaven [TS]

00:43:11   I mean this is the thing you can't [TS]

00:43:13   you're not you're not doing it for other [TS]

00:43:16   people [TS]

00:43:17   you're not trying to like make a good [TS]

00:43:18   impression but I've been trying to to [TS]

00:43:22   replicate that feeling of complete [TS]

00:43:24   Liberty ever since and and the first [TS]

00:43:31   thing you add to that you know the first [TS]

00:43:33   time you're like well if I had a little [TS]

00:43:35   bag maybe it would help you know i have [TS]

00:43:38   i have a bag for my life hat change [TS]

00:43:42   socks you need these are the true [TS]

00:43:44   essentials but still in that bag is an [TS]

00:43:46   attractive nuisance you get put stuff in [TS]

00:43:48   it now [TS]

00:43:49   well and when you wake up you know like [TS]

00:43:50   you're on a train you open your eyes you [TS]

00:43:54   look out the window [TS]

00:43:55   oh shit you're in the town that you [TS]

00:43:57   meant to go to like you have arrived and [TS]

00:44:00   then the train starts to move and you [TS]

00:44:02   realize you you slept through your stop [TS]

00:44:06   if you don't have anything you just [TS]

00:44:10   stand up run down the corridor open the [TS]

00:44:16   door and step onto the station platform [TS]

00:44:20   and the train takes off and you're like [TS]

00:44:22   that uh I did not miss my stop [TS]

00:44:26   but if you have a bag em you gotta turn [TS]

00:44:29   around and get that bag and that few [TS]

00:44:33   seconds hesitation particularly if you [TS]

00:44:36   opened the bag and it's true in your [TS]

00:44:38   stuff around and you gotta throw your [TS]

00:44:40   stuff back in the bag and then the [TS]

00:44:42   trains moving too fast to get off and [TS]

00:44:43   then you're going to the next town and [TS]

00:44:45   then your destiny has changed huh [TS]

00:44:53   I am so far from that Liberty right now [TS]

00:44:57   if you're thinking about a bag for your [TS]

00:44:59   belt buckles you're probably not quite [TS]

00:45:02   there yet [TS]

00:45:03   I got a rack for the belt buckles uh-huh [TS]

00:45:05   so that if on the if one day I'm sitting [TS]

00:45:10   in my living room and somebody is there [TS]

00:45:12   and they're like I really like your [TS]

00:45:13   candlesticks I'm like your globes [TS]

00:45:15   will you show me your other collections [TS]

00:45:17   i can stand up and say where would you [TS]

00:45:22   like to begin [TS]

00:45:23   I suggest we start with the belt buckles [TS]

00:45:26   and i can bring the rack and belt [TS]

00:45:28   buckles it out [TS]

00:45:29   they're all there yeah i mean any good [TS]

00:45:31   tour guide will open by saying have you [TS]

00:45:33   been here before and how much time do [TS]

00:45:35   you have [TS]

00:45:36   that's right i think when you say I'm [TS]

00:45:37   gonna give you an appropriate fee if you [TS]

00:45:38   look at six or seven hours [TS]

00:45:40   let's start with the belt buckles yeah [TS]

00:45:42   the place to start is not not out in the [TS]

00:45:44   barn looking at the collection of five [TS]

00:45:46   horsepower motors place to start is [TS]

00:45:51   right here on a comfortable couch would [TS]

00:45:54   you like to see some tea would you like [TS]

00:45:56   some tea and then I'll of what I think [TS]

00:45:58   the part of the place to start is with [TS]

00:45:59   the lapel pins from various secret [TS]

00:46:02   societies but then we move to the belt [TS]

00:46:04   buckles what about the what about the [TS]

00:46:07   backstage passes for shows that you were [TS]

00:46:09   not playing at that's not contain oh [TS]

00:46:11   that's a cigar box ser box right I've [TS]

00:46:15   got about 20 cigar boxes and they all [TS]

00:46:16   have different like there's movie [TS]

00:46:18   tickets from movies from the eighties [TS]

00:46:21   there's four sports events i went to [TS]

00:46:24   with my dad backstage passes for [TS]

00:46:26   concerts that i was there fully as a [TS]

00:46:28   guest arranged by level of access [TS]

00:46:33   yeah and I can and we can sit all [TS]

00:46:35   afternoon sheriff wants more tea [TS]

00:46:37   I mean you know I'm i basically had a [TS]

00:46:39   kid just so i could have somebody that I [TS]

00:46:42   could force to sit in and get this tour [TS]

00:46:45   once right [TS]

00:46:46   the entire to her when she's about 11 [TS]

00:46:50   years old gonna be like okay time to get [TS]

00:46:53   to know daddy [TS]

00:46:55   I'm not a operating anywhere near your [TS]

00:46:57   level but something I picked up when I [TS]

00:46:59   was traveling more often is first of all [TS]

00:47:02   just a basic realization i think my hype [TS]

00:47:04   action was a kid I think about how I [TS]

00:47:05   packed even through college and even [TS]

00:47:07   through college it was farcical how much [TS]

00:47:10   stuff i would bring with me that I never [TS]

00:47:12   even touched and that was a big thing in [TS]

00:47:14   my head it's gotten a little bit better [TS]

00:47:15   slowly over time but finally got to a [TS]

00:47:17   point where I realized you know I wear [TS]

00:47:20   the same thing every day [TS]

00:47:21   basically i need what I wear every day I [TS]

00:47:24   need clothes for the the event that I'm [TS]

00:47:26   there for which is like if i'm going to [TS]

00:47:28   talk or something i have some clean [TS]

00:47:29   clothes and I need something to sit [TS]

00:47:31   around in right and everything else is [TS]

00:47:34   as extras last two times i'm with you [TS]

00:47:36   the last two places I went I've stayed i [TS]

00:47:38   asked them for toothpaste and shaving [TS]

00:47:41   cream I didn't bring that with me and [TS]

00:47:43   they bring it w man bring up some pretty [TS]

00:47:45   nice toothpaste sure they will have been [TS]

00:47:47   nice to you [TS]

00:47:48   this is what I call the the you know the [TS]

00:47:51   freedom of david bazan right Dave [TS]

00:47:54   Davidson something i don't know on the [TS]

00:47:56   freedom of tapers on a certain point [TS]

00:47:57   they've realized that what he likes to [TS]

00:48:00   wear was a black t-shirt a red hoodie [TS]

00:48:03   with a white zipper and some jeans and [TS]

00:48:07   get you can get that stuff you get it [TS]

00:48:09   and you got it you're done you can get [TS]

00:48:11   it anywhere and he just decided like he [TS]

00:48:14   did like clothes just didn't he didn't [TS]

00:48:18   want to use even the small part of his [TS]

00:48:20   brain that it would have required to [TS]

00:48:24   really like worry about close let alone [TS]

00:48:27   the big part of your brain if you're [TS]

00:48:29   really gonna worry I like this stuff has [TS]

00:48:31   to match and contrast to be interesting [TS]

00:48:32   just like a band and you Klingon you [TS]

00:48:35   look at yourself in the mirror you go is [TS]

00:48:36   that means this me [TS]

00:48:37   Oh boys had a rathole you take it off [TS]

00:48:39   and you put on another reason for a [TS]

00:48:41   better man than that i am ok that but so [TS]

00:48:44   dave was just like eliminate all of this [TS]

00:48:46   from my from my existence and I'm just [TS]

00:48:49   going with this [TS]

00:48:50   this thing this is going to be me and he [TS]

00:48:52   he doesn't he doesn't and it is his it [TS]

00:48:56   you know if UC Davis on in a collared [TS]

00:48:58   shirt he might as well be wearing a fake [TS]

00:49:01   mustache you wouldn't even right on top [TS]

00:49:03   of his regular must eat cisco who's that [TS]

00:49:06   guy kind of looks like they've been [TS]

00:49:07   somebody's in a college [TS]

00:49:08   hurt so so he's freed himself he is [TS]

00:49:11   liberated himself from all these free [TS]

00:49:14   nage bezane that's right all the free [TS]

00:49:16   all these small tyranny 'he's of like [TS]

00:49:19   does this thing fit right and once they [TS]

00:49:22   won't stick to him [TS]

00:49:23   hey they're ineligible this those [TS]

00:49:25   problems right [TS]

00:49:26   he's just he's got a he has basically [TS]

00:49:29   like his superhero costume and it's so [TS]

00:49:33   it's a red hoodie [TS]

00:49:34   here's my other thing though and this [TS]

00:49:35   has actually been really helpful and [TS]

00:49:37   this is ally fact but the time that I [TS]

00:49:40   think about what i really need for a [TS]

00:49:43   trip the best time for me to think about [TS]

00:49:45   what i need for a trip is when i'm in in [TS]

00:49:48   my case like a hotel room i'm already in [TS]

00:49:50   a hotel room and I'm thinking about what [TS]

00:49:52   i really need so i started this text [TS]

00:49:53   file a couple years ago of like when i [TS]

00:49:55   write think of something I really want [TS]

00:49:57   my small bag for packing now has gotten [TS]

00:49:59   very simple it's basically what i just [TS]

00:50:01   described to you right [TS]

00:50:02   I don't bring all the entertainment [TS]

00:50:03   equipment anymore really you know you [TS]

00:50:05   got an iphone or ipad for the kid or [TS]

00:50:07   whatever but in my case you know what I [TS]

00:50:09   like I like a large cup to drink water [TS]

00:50:11   out of my drink a lot of water i want a [TS]

00:50:13   large cup bring a large cup its small [TS]

00:50:15   you can stuff stuff in it things like [TS]

00:50:17   that we're in a large cup [TS]

00:50:19   well it's like my brother towel right [TS]

00:50:21   okay all right here's what I'm trying to [TS]

00:50:22   say is that like when you're sitting [TS]

00:50:23   there and you're stressed out and [TS]

00:50:25   thinking about packing stress to me is [TS]

00:50:28   what makes people jam way too much stuff [TS]

00:50:30   into any kind of bag is thinking there's [TS]

00:50:32   innumerable things [TS]

00:50:33   the thing is what happens if I get [TS]

00:50:35   invited to a nice party I better I'd [TS]

00:50:37   better put how to stuff like you're [TS]

00:50:38   invited to three nice parties [TS]

00:50:39   yeah right and and so but then you end [TS]

00:50:41   up doing its kind of similar problems of [TS]

00:50:43   like the way people deal with backup [TS]

00:50:45   which if they're constantly kind of [TS]

00:50:46   blindly backing stuff up here and there [TS]

00:50:48   it's not that useful because they would [TS]

00:50:49   know where to get it if they needed it [TS]

00:50:51   so in my case I try to really dumb all [TS]

00:50:53   that way down to like what's the most [TS]

00:50:55   essential stuff i need you know pretty [TS]

00:50:57   much almost anywhere I go I'm your mall [TS]

00:50:58   so if I shit myself I can't are over to [TS]

00:51:01   the mall and get another pair of pants I [TS]

00:51:02   don't like the word pairs of pants [TS]

00:51:04   that's not gonna be a nice trip over to [TS]

00:51:05   the mall but hey you know you can't plan [TS]

00:51:08   for everything is an evony own at the [TS]

00:51:09   depth at the w hotel you can send you [TS]

00:51:11   can call down to the front desk and say [TS]

00:51:13   hi I'm smelling up in room 1404 I just [TS]

00:51:17   shit myself can you get somebody to run [TS]

00:51:19   little and we're fucked [TS]

00:51:23   yeah I just a giant shit my benefits [TS]

00:51:26   could you bring me up some 3430 anything [TS]

00:51:28   happen but hey i got my shoeshine the [TS]

00:51:33   other day and the shoes are gonna give [TS]

00:51:35   me give me a shout out there for that [TS]

00:51:37   idea the idea is this is very very high [TS]

00:51:39   level but if you end up traveling a lot [TS]

00:51:40   and what I'm trying to give you a [TS]

00:51:41   freebie here for working on the small [TS]

00:51:43   bag idea because the problem is on the [TS]

00:51:45   one hand yes let's take it as read [TS]

00:51:47   let's say it because it needs to be said [TS]

00:51:49   you need to be fucking thinking about [TS]

00:51:50   your small bag a little more than you [TS]

00:51:52   think but you don't be acting on the [TS]

00:51:54   small bag also more often than you think [TS]

00:51:56   so the thing is thinking about thinking [TS]

00:51:58   in when you're in your house all that [TS]

00:52:00   junk in your belt buckles that's not the [TS]

00:52:01   greatest time to think about a small bag [TS]

00:52:03   no no force yourself into some probation [TS]

00:52:05   and figure out what you really need the [TS]

00:52:06   best small kine 89% the best small bag [TS]

00:52:10   the best go bag is the bag you're [TS]

00:52:12   already living out of em but it's not [TS]

00:52:16   small [TS]

00:52:17   well it has to be small and it's small [TS]

00:52:19   it's a small bag and concept is the [TS]

00:52:21   concept of the small bag or the go bag [TS]

00:52:23   and then there's the idea of the always [TS]

00:52:25   Reddy back so you're saying like you're [TS]

00:52:26   already probably got most of what you [TS]

00:52:28   need like a backpack [TS]

00:52:29   I feel like most people small bag is [TS]

00:52:32   actually their car [TS]

00:52:33   yep they already have a small bag and [TS]

00:52:36   it's their car and they have everything [TS]

00:52:37   their office their desk i was i I got my [TS]

00:52:40   shoes shined at the airport and the [TS]

00:52:42   shoeshine guy was telling me this story [TS]

00:52:44   about how he was a twin of fraternal [TS]

00:52:46   twin but his sister was like she was 9 [TS]

00:52:51   pounds when they were born he was four [TS]

00:52:53   pounds he was he was trying to tell me [TS]

00:52:55   that he was the runt but a and it was a [TS]

00:52:59   pretty involved story interesting and [TS]

00:53:02   unusual thing to bring up when you're [TS]

00:53:03   Shannon somebody's shoes [TS]

00:53:04   well you know I mean you got to talk [TS]

00:53:06   about something teaches that but at a [TS]

00:53:08   certain point he must have recognized [TS]

00:53:10   something in me and he looked up at me [TS]

00:53:11   and he said you carry up to carry a fork [TS]

00:53:13   and spoon with you and I was like huh [TS]

00:53:18   no I don't he was like you gotta carry a [TS]

00:53:20   fork and spoon and I said [TS]

00:53:24   how am I going to get on an airplane [TS]

00:53:25   with a fork and spoon and he said oh I [TS]

00:53:28   mean it can be plastic it can be would [TS]

00:53:30   but he said I don't go and do you [TS]

00:53:34   traveling constantly the wooden for said [TS]

00:53:38   I don't join like that looking at him [TS]

00:53:39   and I was like there was a time when I [TS]

00:53:43   did carry a fortune spoons and now I [TS]

00:53:46   mess kit [TS]

00:53:47   yeah now i somehow i think i'm too good [TS]

00:53:49   to carry a fork and spoon [TS]

00:53:51   I'm not too good to carry a fork and [TS]

00:53:52   spoon was a wake-up call wake-up call it [TS]

00:53:54   was I was like I should fucking have a [TS]

00:53:56   fork and spoon [TS]

00:53:57   well a few hours later I'm on the subway [TS]

00:54:00   in New York City and I'm looking around [TS]

00:54:02   you remember the story about the guy [TS]

00:54:04   with the with the nice boots on the [TS]

00:54:06   subway in New York City [TS]

00:54:07   yes of course the guy with dignity [TS]

00:54:09   that's right well I'm looking around the [TS]

00:54:11   subway in New York City and everybody [TS]

00:54:13   set somehow either everybody in New [TS]

00:54:15   York's been listening to our podcast or [TS]

00:54:17   times have changed but everybody on the [TS]

00:54:21   subway had some like really expensive [TS]

00:54:24   pretty cool boots like the era of small [TS]

00:54:29   shoes / we are in the area of like [TS]

00:54:34   written as episode 60 written his boots [TS]

00:54:37   written his boots right we are in the [TS]

00:54:39   area now of like it ya like it as the [TS]

00:54:44   small just imagining like almost like [TS]

00:54:47   foot-binding people in like in like park [TS]

00:54:50   slope that's what specialist that's what [TS]

00:54:53   it looked like to me fucking small shoes [TS]

00:54:55   was it like forced perspective but now [TS]

00:54:59   now everybody's wearing these work boots [TS]

00:55:02   then do not actually a like comport with [TS]

00:55:06   the jobs that they do [TS]

00:55:08   yeah it's the f-150 with no scratches in [TS]

00:55:10   the bed yeah and I'm looking around on [TS]

00:55:12   the subway and I'm like wow everybody's [TS]

00:55:13   got really cool boots in new york and [TS]

00:55:16   i'm wearing my travel shoes clarks my [TS]

00:55:22   travel shoes are actually a pair of like [TS]

00:55:24   you know they're like pull on boots just [TS]

00:55:30   like these Australian yeah that's that's [TS]

00:55:33   why didn't you get out you know you like [TS]

00:55:34   it there [TS]

00:55:36   the purpose but I went from thinking I [TS]

00:55:40   should have a wooden fork that I carry [TS]

00:55:42   with me everywhere in case somebody [TS]

00:55:44   offers me some stew like if somebody's [TS]

00:55:48   like you want a little bit you want to [TS]

00:55:49   get in on this too and you and you're [TS]

00:55:52   like yeah and they go get your fork [TS]

00:55:55   Oh me and around footwork [TS]

00:55:58   I don't have a fork and then the answer [TS]

00:56:00   is going to be like sorry [TS]

00:56:01   the offer was for students to present [TS]

00:56:03   you with a full yeah what did you want [TS]

00:56:04   me to do like set you want to carry that [TS]

00:56:06   works for everybody [TS]

00:56:07   I'm going into my meeting with works i [TS]

00:56:09   opened the can and put it all over a [TS]

00:56:11   fire if you want since to get your fork [TS]

00:56:13   if you don't if you don't have a fork [TS]

00:56:16   then you must not need to stick once you [TS]

00:56:18   know you can get your fork [TS]

00:56:19   yeah and so I went from that and just a [TS]

00:56:22   few hours later I'm sitting on the [TS]

00:56:23   subway and I'm like shit I'm I'm not rep [TS]

00:56:25   I'm not ripping any boots here like I [TS]

00:56:28   got boots on but they're not i mean it's [TS]

00:56:31   like red wing redwing redwing redway [TS]

00:56:33   whites boots and and chippewa boots I [TS]

00:56:38   mean there's the subway was just it was [TS]

00:56:40   like a boot store and I've got some [TS]

00:56:42   boots but in order to be in order to be [TS]

00:56:45   reppin those boots on that new york city [TS]

00:56:46   subway i would have had to pack an [TS]

00:56:48   entirely different small back i think he [TS]

00:56:51   made the right decision [TS]

00:56:52   I think so too but you know it's funny [TS]

00:56:54   where your mind can go [TS]

00:56:55   uh-huh half of my mind is thinking you [TS]

00:56:58   can you just need to do you need to get [TS]

00:57:00   on that plane with a fork and that's it [TS]

00:57:02   you're going to New York bring for what [TS]

00:57:05   am I i might be thinking like what could [TS]

00:57:07   have been different for me like how many [TS]

00:57:09   things with words it was my perception [TS]

00:57:10   way off because I knew in my heart I did [TS]

00:57:12   not have a wooden fork with me yeah [TS]

00:57:13   right you don't even walk over and say [TS]

00:57:15   means two spells good oh my gosh so many [TS]

00:57:17   doors that won't even walk up to because [TS]

00:57:19   you're like shit i don't have a fork I'm [TS]

00:57:21   like you know just turn around just walk [TS]

00:57:23   away and then a few hours later I'm [TS]

00:57:25   thinking I should have brought a bigger [TS]

00:57:26   bag so that I could have some boots to [TS]

00:57:28   be part of this boot party here on the f [TS]

00:57:30   train and it's just like no no no quiet [TS]

00:57:34   down quiet down chorus of of [TS]

00:57:37   haberdashers ok needle you need a fork [TS]

00:57:42   that you can take through security and [TS]

00:57:46   everything else is gravy [TS]

00:57:48   mhm [TS]

00:57:49   you know I never would have thought of [TS]

00:57:50   that I never would have thought of [TS]

00:57:51   having a wooden fork [TS]

00:57:52   I've got some silicon silicon silicon on [TS]

00:57:55   bowls that I got from like a camping [TS]

00:57:58   store and you get this package that one [TS]

00:58:00   big ball one little Bowl and if you [TS]

00:58:02   imagine something that looks like the [TS]

00:58:03   size of a grapefruit with the top cut [TS]

00:58:05   off [TS]

00:58:06   it's made out of very thin black [TS]

00:58:08   silicone so the job is collapsible right [TS]

00:58:11   and that's actually surprisingly handy [TS]

00:58:14   to have in situations [TS]

00:58:15   well it's true but it takes up no space [TS]

00:58:17   in no way in my experience of eating a [TS]

00:58:20   campfire stew you can you can always eat [TS]

00:58:24   out of the pot [TS]

00:58:25   yep you're going to pot is already pot [TS]

00:58:27   there which gotta have a fork and in the [TS]

00:58:29   absence of fork honestly you can use a [TS]

00:58:31   sharpened stick but you're not going to [TS]

00:58:32   get that through security [TS]

00:58:35   I you know what I i feel like when i [TS]

00:58:38   leave here today I'm gonna go buy a [TS]

00:58:40   wooden fork and spoon [TS]

00:58:42   yeah I don't plan on it not a giant one [TS]

00:58:44   sign of the game is on a small like a [TS]

00:58:48   little cap kit [TS]

00:58:49   yep but you can get you can get onto an [TS]

00:58:51   airplane John this is the entire point [TS]

00:58:53   this is the entire point it was not the [TS]

00:58:55   entire point but it's a point it's a [TS]

00:58:57   point that that's the thing you never [TS]

00:58:58   would have thought of if you hadn't had [TS]

00:59:00   that little kismet serendipity [TS]

00:59:02   experience with the crazy shoeshine guy [TS]

00:59:04   you would have thought about colory now [TS]

00:59:07   you're rethinking got a whole new [TS]

00:59:08   thought technology for the small bag you [TS]

00:59:10   want to pack he's helping me by asking [TS]

00:59:13   me the right question right like he he [TS]

00:59:17   looked at me and was like what is this [TS]

00:59:19   guy need to know today man and you know [TS]

00:59:22   and he interrupted himself because he [TS]

00:59:27   really was in the middle of this story [TS]

00:59:28   about how his his big sister got all the [TS]

00:59:31   milk she weigh twice as much as it hurt [TS]

00:59:35   yeah but he looked up he looked up and [TS]

00:59:37   he was like I don't he stopped his story [TS]

00:59:40   was like you you caring for containing [TS]

00:59:42   he just tell and I was like you know and [TS]

00:59:45   I was sitting there like I'm getting my [TS]

00:59:46   shoeshine I'm big-time big wheel [TS]

00:59:48   I'm looking around hey everybody how's [TS]

00:59:50   it going checking out an airplane [TS]

00:59:53   anytime now hey right but my my flights [TS]

00:59:57   just a few minutes but I get my shoe [TS]

00:59:59   shop [TS]

00:59:59   shop [TS]

01:00:00   and then immediately I'm be reset like [TS]

01:00:03   fuck you fuck you prepare yourself for [TS]

01:00:07   that you never know in this moment [TS]

01:00:08   you're gonna come along but it's right [TS]

01:00:10   he was right and it's and that is the [TS]

01:00:12   right that's the right knowledge so [TS]

01:00:15   where are you two as you stand here [TS]

01:00:16   today where do you stand with the small [TS]

01:00:18   bag because I because it seems to me [TS]

01:00:20   like you're not really talking about the [TS]

01:00:21   canonical John Roderick small bag you're [TS]

01:00:24   talking about like this secondary small [TS]

01:00:25   bags the like I mean like in my case [TS]

01:00:27   like we don't even have all of our [TS]

01:00:29   yearbooks in the same place like if we [TS]

01:00:31   wanted to save like family photos there [TS]

01:00:33   in like five places in the house that's [TS]

01:00:35   the kind of thing that with the belt [TS]

01:00:36   buckle that's what i get with the belt [TS]

01:00:37   buckle is like if I had if this place is [TS]

01:00:39   on fire and I can grab like three things [TS]

01:00:41   what would I grabbed the kind of what [TS]

01:00:42   you're saying well and the thing about [TS]

01:00:43   your books that I let's get ready to get [TS]

01:00:45   your daughter and your wooden fork and [TS]

01:00:47   your boots right it's like what's next [TS]

01:00:49   you got it you got to train your [TS]

01:00:50   daughter to the egress the building on [TS]

01:00:52   her own you know like you gotta say [TS]

01:00:55   listen when the house is on fire when I [TS]

01:00:56   yell what I yell it out sorry fire house [TS]

01:01:00   on fire hit the bricks [TS]

01:01:01   you've got to you gotta handle that you [TS]

01:01:05   gotta have that angle because I'm gonna [TS]

01:01:06   be grabbing your books and stuff yeah [TS]

01:01:08   everybody knows their job but what I [TS]

01:01:11   discovered about your books is you can [TS]

01:01:12   get any yearbook on on the internet [TS]

01:01:14   there you go to let your yearbooks burn [TS]

01:01:16   what are you somebody wrote on their [TS]

01:01:18   Merlin stay sweet see you next year's my [TS]

01:01:20   hopefully less fat and biology class [TS]

01:01:22   yeah not me like a sis here got it but [TS]

01:01:25   shadow photos family photos you gotta [TS]

01:01:27   get they only have to be in one network [TS]

01:01:29   grab back but uh I think about this [TS]

01:01:34   every once in a while like the whole [TS]

01:01:35   house burns down everything is gone [TS]

01:01:38   yeah what is freedom what's the one [TS]

01:01:40   thing that you that you would be like oh [TS]

01:01:45   shit [TS]

01:01:47   and um I can tell you I couldn't tell [TS]

01:01:51   you one thing I couldn't tell you either [TS]

01:01:53   this is the i think of something else be [TS]

01:01:55   fine i would personally I'm sad to say [TS]

01:01:57   be fine with almost nothing [TS]

01:01:59   well and that's a mat is illustrative [TS]

01:02:02   right now it's sad it's sad i mean like [TS]

01:02:04   we are we did a big perch a few years [TS]

01:02:06   ago before I was before we moved we did [TS]

01:02:10   one of these when i read this book about [TS]

01:02:12   about getting rid of clutter in your [TS]

01:02:14   life and we had a really big impact on [TS]

01:02:16   me [TS]

01:02:17   the basic pieces of the book is don't [TS]

01:02:19   have anything in your life that's not [TS]

01:02:20   going to be closer to the life you want [TS]

01:02:22   which means systematically ruthlessly [TS]

01:02:25   getting rid of everything that cleaves [TS]

01:02:26   you to a life you never had or no longer [TS]

01:02:28   half what you think about it goes for [TS]

01:02:30   almost everything and that's where you [TS]

01:02:32   get into like all these clothes that [TS]

01:02:33   don't fit anymore and stuff like that [TS]

01:02:35   and I was ruthless I mean I really work [TS]

01:02:37   the system and i went in the two things [TS]

01:02:40   are you this is gonna sound down but two [TS]

01:02:41   things I regret [TS]

01:02:42   there there were some actually not [TS]

01:02:45   wholly not disgusting rock-and-roll [TS]

01:02:47   t-shirts i kinda wish I can't like a [TS]

01:02:48   couple of them i throw every t-shirt i [TS]

01:02:51   had bought a rock show or been given [TS]

01:02:53   like we had a convention or whatever I [TS]

01:02:55   throughout pretty much all those bags [TS]

01:02:57   and bags and bags of shitty t-shirts so [TS]

01:03:00   i kind of miss some of those the other [TS]

01:03:02   one is by accident we had very [TS]

01:03:04   systematically taken all of our many [TS]

01:03:06   different bags like Timbuktu bags cool [TS]

01:03:09   backpacks and put them all in one [TS]

01:03:11   contractor bag which accidentally got [TS]

01:03:13   thrown away [TS]

01:03:14   oh I wish I hadn't thrown away like [TS]

01:03:16   eight bags all the bags and you know how [TS]

01:03:19   I am with bags [TS]

01:03:20   yea yea though I do i do know so that I [TS]

01:03:22   regret but you know it comes up once a [TS]

01:03:24   month or so I think boy that was a [TS]

01:03:25   really cool you know that good that [TS]

01:03:27   microsoft event in seattle where they [TS]

01:03:30   put up the W and they gave me that cool [TS]

01:03:31   messenger bag going gone [TS]

01:03:33   that was a nice messenger back as a [TS]

01:03:35   messenger bag felt like a briefcase and [TS]

01:03:37   now I'm gonna cry I promised myself I [TS]

01:03:38   wouldn't cry [TS]

01:03:39   I don't know what would be that I [TS]

01:03:40   grabbed you know ever since I started [TS]

01:03:43   calling this half my life had yeah i [TS]

01:03:45   would i would grab it now I didn't see I [TS]

01:03:48   I gotta go over this with my daughter [TS]

01:03:49   though because first of all I have to [TS]

01:03:50   convince my daughter first of all honey [TS]

01:03:52   you say you're gonna carry this we're [TS]

01:03:53   going to ride scooters well first of all [TS]

01:03:54   you do not need to bring a stuffed [TS]

01:03:56   animal to ride a scooter or do you want [TS]

01:03:58   to bring a stuffed animal to ride a [TS]

01:03:59   scooter you need to put in a backpack [TS]

01:04:01   that goes on your back correct does not [TS]

01:04:03   mean mommy's tiny purse that you put on [TS]

01:04:05   your wrist that was not count because [TS]

01:04:07   let me explain everything you think [TS]

01:04:09   you're going to carry for even 10 [TS]

01:04:11   minutes I am going to end up carrying [TS]

01:04:13   everyone writes and I got to be that guy [TS]

01:04:16   when we get there and we but we're not [TS]

01:04:18   even up to the point where we start [TS]

01:04:19   shooting she goes could get you a whole [TS]

01:04:21   rabbit friend [TS]

01:04:22   okay you know what I love rabbit friend [TS]

01:04:23   but this is exactly just so you know [TS]

01:04:25   what I sound like a crazy person back at [TS]

01:04:27   the house [TS]

01:04:27   this is what I'm talking about so now [TS]

01:04:28   i'm carrying my wife's personal my [TS]

01:04:29   wrists with a rabbit in it [TS]

01:04:31   yeah and that doesn't work for me know [TS]

01:04:32   so but so on so first of all I have to [TS]

01:04:34   help her understand what a bad person [TS]

01:04:36   she is and second of all show her that [TS]

01:04:38   if rabbit friend got dropped on muni [TS]

01:04:40   like you'd be bummed [TS]

01:04:42   yeah you not bring heirloom-quality [TS]

01:04:43   stuffed animals onto things because you [TS]

01:04:45   will eventually forget and beset that's [TS]

01:04:47   right i mean the people that have dogs [TS]

01:04:50   that they equipped with saddle bags that [TS]

01:04:52   are carrying their food i got pannier [TS]

01:04:54   that go on here it's right I i always [TS]

01:04:57   feel like right on like that dog is that [TS]

01:05:01   dog is totally its own barge scary [TS]

01:05:04   thought you might like you had had the [TS]

01:05:06   companion sandwich you're saying it's [TS]

01:05:08   got cable [TS]

01:05:08   this guy's got cables bags got cable in [TS]

01:05:11   one side and and and you know thanks [TS]

01:05:14   probably killing the other side and and [TS]

01:05:19   the thing is I think I I admire those [TS]

01:05:21   people the people that tie their dog [TS]

01:05:22   shit to the dog's collar want in a bag [TS]

01:05:27   that but you haven't seen this where the [TS]

01:05:29   dog poops never be co-owner picks up the [TS]

01:05:32   poop in a bag [TS]

01:05:33   no and then ties the bag to the dog's [TS]

01:05:35   collar is that sounds like that's that's [TS]

01:05:38   something riddle is the right punishment [TS]

01:05:40   i don't think so i think it's just that [TS]

01:05:42   they don't understand never put them [TS]

01:05:44   they they claim to be animal lovers they [TS]

01:05:47   claim to love living animal companions [TS]

01:05:49   but they have never put themselves in [TS]

01:05:52   the dogs pause long enough to imagine [TS]

01:05:54   how would i like it if my shit was tied [TS]

01:05:57   around my neck like I I'm a dog i am [TS]

01:06:00   shitting on the ground and i expect to [TS]

01:06:02   leave it behind [TS]

01:06:04   yeah you guys usually some kind of [TS]

01:06:06   little someone's fantasy Opera where you [TS]

01:06:08   pick up my poop that's fine you don't [TS]

01:06:10   you drop it to my head [TS]

01:06:11   are you gonna be fucking carrier my [TS]

01:06:14   collar and you're going to be [TS]

01:06:15   enthusiastic I see this all the time I [TS]

01:06:17   don't know what I've never seen that and [TS]

01:06:19   that that's miserable i don't know what [TS]

01:06:21   garbage cans can't just throw away [TS]

01:06:23   well it's like they maybe maybe what [TS]

01:06:25   they are expressing is like I didn't [TS]

01:06:27   throw my dog's poop in your garbage can [TS]

01:06:30   maybe it's some kind of martyr thing yes [TS]

01:06:32   several martyr thing but they are [TS]

01:06:34   million eyes only [TS]

01:06:35   thicker but with poop that's right [TS]

01:06:36   they're making their dog bear the bear [TS]

01:06:38   the burden but if I could carry my [TS]

01:06:42   kibble in a saddlebag yeah i think i [TS]

01:06:45   would I think I would do it [TS]

01:06:46   strap it to your daughter you keeping [TS]

01:06:47   yourself but I say that but I say this [TS]

01:06:49   to do I say this to my daughter to like [TS]

01:06:51   pack in and pack out like you again [TS]

01:06:57   Bed Buddy does not leave the bed first [TS]

01:06:59   of all it's right in the names right in [TS]

01:07:01   the name of bad bunny sad bunny not [TS]

01:07:03   living room bunny not carboni there is a [TS]

01:07:05   car bunny foo foo that's a totally [TS]

01:07:07   different funny that's right you leave [TS]

01:07:09   that money in the bed yet carbon in the [TS]

01:07:11   car but if we're going out on an [TS]

01:07:14   adventure you've got to schlep your own [TS]

01:07:16   stuff you got to put your own barge get [TS]

01:07:19   a lift your own bail [TS]

01:07:20   yes I think if you told a barge people [TS]

01:07:24   are gonna expect you to lift the bail as [TS]

01:07:25   well you can just lift the bail you also [TS]

01:07:27   have to tilt the barge took you took the [TS]

01:07:29   barge and then you lift the pail can [TS]

01:07:30   also just give you thought on twins [TS]

01:07:32   I just want to say i want to get this [TS]

01:07:33   out of the way i'll probably cut this [TS]

01:07:34   out because I realize how normative it [TS]

01:07:36   is I'm first of all kind of freaked out [TS]

01:07:37   by twins as a thing all networks or just [TS]

01:07:40   an identical to the whole idea identical [TS]

01:07:43   twins i think are pretty freaky but the [TS]

01:07:46   thing about identical twins if you claim [TS]

01:07:47   to be an identical twin and that [TS]

01:07:50   identical twin is still alive we can put [TS]

01:07:52   you right next to each other and we can [TS]

01:07:54   tell if you're telling the truth you can [TS]

01:07:55   you say you're an identical twin right [TS]

01:07:57   there should be away [TS]

01:07:59   well you know you put them next to each [TS]

01:08:01   other i think a lot of people who say [TS]

01:08:02   the fraternal twins [TS]

01:08:04   I'm not saying they're lying but it's [TS]

01:08:06   very difficult if that man's sister [TS]

01:08:09   literally weigh twice as much as him at [TS]

01:08:10   birth [TS]

01:08:11   I'm not sure that fully qualifies as [TS]

01:08:12   twins and I think he might be making it [TS]

01:08:14   up [TS]

01:08:14   dunno dunno who Nels Cline is I don't [TS]

01:08:18   think so [TS]

01:08:18   nose client is a guitar player he has a [TS]

01:08:21   female Nelson notice Holden's those guys [TS]

01:08:24   are twins ok [TS]

01:08:25   Nels Cline is a is in Wilko right now [TS]

01:08:29   but he's played with my quad is done a [TS]

01:08:32   lot of jazz type of music he's an [TS]

01:08:34   avant-garde guitar player let's call it [TS]

01:08:36   met [TS]

01:08:38   and a very nice man and he is a mirror [TS]

01:08:43   twin you know what a mirror twins but [TS]

01:08:47   like he has the same features but but in [TS]

01:08:48   the opposite side [TS]

01:08:49   mhm his brothers lazy eye on one side [TS]

01:08:52   than the other way [TS]

01:08:53   his brother is an identical twin but but [TS]

01:08:55   so identical that they are mirrors his [TS]

01:08:58   brother parts his hair on the left nails [TS]

01:09:00   parts here on the right on is his [TS]

01:09:02   brother you know like is left-handed or [TS]

01:09:04   nails is left-handed his brother is [TS]

01:09:06   right-handed nose is left-handed but he [TS]

01:09:08   plays the guitar right-handed on my god [TS]

01:09:10   like twin twin science at a much higher [TS]

01:09:13   level and and Nelson's like you know my [TS]

01:09:15   brother and I have very very different [TS]

01:09:16   personalities [TS]

01:09:18   oh it's like there's always an evil twin [TS]

01:09:19   like it in a way like we are opposite [TS]

01:09:22   and I'm like you guys are identical [TS]

01:09:24   twins but mirror images of one another [TS]

01:09:27   and that includes the personality you [TS]

01:09:30   don't want you don't watch enough [TS]

01:09:31   science fiction though it's always been [TS]

01:09:33   able to use that required by law to have [TS]

01:09:36   a goatee [TS]

01:09:37   well yeah maybe I should have asked him [TS]

01:09:39   does his brother have a goatee but his [TS]

01:09:40   brother is some kind of like scientists [TS]

01:09:42   in california girls is a guitar player [TS]

01:09:46   take this could be one of those are [TS]

01:09:48   liars paradox cretins things where like [TS]

01:09:52   if you ask them think about that we r uu [TS]

01:09:54   acid to you take two twins and you ask [TS]

01:09:56   them are you the evil twin there must be [TS]

01:09:58   a way there must be a logical puzzle [TS]

01:10:00   where you can ask the right question to [TS]

01:10:01   make them prove which was the evil to [TS]

01:10:03   net Mel's cannot tell a lie exactly is a [TS]

01:10:07   woman yeah they're going to tell evil [TS]

01:10:09   twin would you say what would your twins [TS]

01:10:14   say that you are the evil twin [TS]

01:10:17   it's gotta be where you can add a good [TS]

01:10:20   time not a magician right man [TS]

01:10:24   nails his middle name is Courtney no [TS]

01:10:27   really [TS]

01:10:28   Nels Courtney Cline committed an [TS]

01:10:30   identical twin brother alex klein is [TS]

01:10:34   that right i see no honey middle name to [TS]

01:10:36   Courtney climb yeah that no he doesn't [TS]

01:10:39   appear to have a middle name see this [TS]

01:10:41   whole thing's already falling party [TS]

01:10:43   see what I'm saying is you supposed to [TS]

01:10:45   name them and funny pairs right if you [TS]

01:10:47   have if i had twins i would definitely [TS]

01:10:49   name them in some kind of book match [TS]

01:10:50   twin named like a little too clever i'll [TS]

01:10:54   let you know I my i gave my daughter a [TS]

01:10:57   clever name and she's actually wearing [TS]

01:11:00   that forever and I think about it all [TS]

01:11:02   the time I think back a three-and-a-half [TS]

01:11:05   years ago to my three-and-a-half years [TS]

01:11:06   ago self and I want to just you know not [TS]

01:11:09   the type of clever neighbor I want to [TS]

01:11:10   grab my three-and-a-half-year-old [TS]

01:11:12   three-and-a-half year ago self and like [TS]

01:11:15   shake him by the lapels but i do want to [TS]

01:11:18   put an arm around him up to the [TS]

01:11:21   whiteboard and walking through something [TS]

01:11:22   and just be like hey yeah I i get it i [TS]

01:11:25   didn't you ever has the same name as two [TS]

01:11:27   other kids I know what the same name and [TS]

01:11:28   all three are spelled differently haha [TS]

01:11:30   but i but I i just want to be like you [TS]

01:11:33   know this is I I love everything about [TS]

01:11:36   this but you know maybe just settle down [TS]

01:11:41   a little bit [TS]

01:11:42   settle down settle down you know like [TS]

01:11:47   this is great this is the impulses great [TS]

01:11:49   didn't go with the Bell tones which is [TS]

01:11:51   good my kids class there's to Ayden's a [TS]

01:11:54   jade indication i might be concatenated [TS]

01:11:57   some of that from last year but there [TS]

01:11:59   are certain names we've got having a [TS]

01:12:00   letter after it you know you're going to [TS]

01:12:03   bkk deaf or whatever [TS]

01:12:06   yeah I feel like when you and I were in [TS]

01:12:09   school when we were kids [TS]

01:12:10   everyone was named Jason Todd chef oh [TS]

01:12:14   yeah [TS]

01:12:14   dr. maybe maybe a Rick you get Jennifer [TS]

01:12:18   annalisa but Joe know you know a john [TS]

01:12:22   but we should do more Kate's I'm really [TS]

01:12:24   i love the name Kate oh I know some [TS]

01:12:26   Kate's well i don't think i don't i [TS]

01:12:28   don't know if you do want to know some [TS]

01:12:29   case it's just like it sounds right [TS]

01:12:34   I've known some fuckin Cates Cates Cates [TS]

01:12:37   Cates out a handful [TS]

01:12:39   kate is a fucking handful is exactly [TS]

01:12:41   right because of pictures like [TS]

01:12:43   Catherine's are already a problem [TS]

01:12:47   gather the care gather the see either [TS]

01:12:51   one Catherine's with the KR a much [TS]

01:12:53   bigger problem captain with the sea but [TS]

01:12:56   you know as soon as they start going by [TS]

01:12:57   cat [TS]

01:12:58   oh forget it no like get away but but a [TS]

01:13:02   Kate [TS]

01:13:04   is kate is just a cadence just trying to [TS]

01:13:06   convince just trying to convince you [TS]

01:13:08   that she's not a cat and so you should [TS]

01:13:10   be you should assume that she's [TS]

01:13:11   reasonable right she's yeah it's a cat [TS]

01:13:13   in Kate's clipping you know what I mean [TS]

01:13:15   like a decade [TS]

01:13:16   kate is some cases a gala can wear jeans [TS]

01:13:18   came from Turkey cakes perky has a high [TS]

01:13:20   ponytail sure she'll help you clear she [TS]

01:13:24   been working since she was really young [TS]

01:13:26   she'll help you clear the yard like [TS]

01:13:28   cages yes she's down with the struggle [TS]

01:13:30   but oh what a handful kate is carrying a [TS]

01:13:33   fucking pistol [TS]

01:13:35   what about Kat oh come on come on Kat I [TS]

01:13:41   mean catus cat you guys have sometimes [TS]

01:13:45   but you're not gonna let cat and we're [TS]

01:13:48   going to let her use your wooden floor [TS]

01:13:49   first of all don't like at know where [TS]

01:13:51   you live [TS]

01:13:53   ok oh yeah Kate's one of those names [TS]

01:14:00   though I always I always fantasize is [TS]

01:14:03   the wrong word but I always aspired to [TS]

01:14:04   have a girlfriend named Kate [TS]

01:14:05   yep yep yeah great name I mean who could [TS]

01:14:08   not love Kate you say i want to [TS]

01:14:11   introduce you my friend you're my friend [TS]

01:14:12   Kate you're already falling in love you [TS]

01:14:14   having this matter [TS]

01:14:15   yep this is Kate huh Katie no no you get [TS]

01:14:22   a different thing at 8080 is so [TS]

01:14:24   different [TS]

01:14:25   who it is a graphic designer I think I [TS]

01:14:31   think Kate has a garden but like a kind [TS]

01:14:34   of foxy garden [TS]

01:14:35   ok has a garden for sure and and she's [TS]

01:14:38   growing you know she's growing some [TS]

01:14:40   plants that need to be explained [TS]

01:14:44   wooden fork [TS]