Roderick on the Line

00:00:00 ◼   ► Roderick on the line is unabashedly [TS]

00:00:01 ◼   ► sponsored by a glue software a digital [TS]

00:00:03 ◼   ► workplace that helps you work better [TS]

00:00:05 ◼   ► with other people sign up for a free [TS]

00:00:07 ◼   ► 30-day trial an igloo software.com / [TS]

00:00:10 ◼   ► find your duck [TS]

00:00:11 ◼   ► [Music] [TS]

00:00:16 ◼   ► photo know what is it just this isn't at [TS]

00:00:21 ◼   ► all [TS]

00:00:22 ◼   ► oh hello this is a test call while [TS]

00:00:25 ◼   ► you're calling me how did you get this [TS]

00:00:29 ◼   ► number [TS]

00:00:30 ◼   ► I like it how does my voice sound oh my [TS]

00:00:33 ◼   ► god it's never sounded so clear [TS]

00:00:36 ◼   ► really I feel like you are sitting here [TS]

00:00:38 ◼   ► on my lap which would be buried on ready [TS]

00:00:41 ◼   ► from my paddling Santa setting that I'm [TS]

00:00:43 ◼   ► in the altogether [TS]

00:00:44 ◼   ► I'll come on it's so sad if you were [TS]

00:00:47 ◼   ► sitting here right now huh it because it [TS]

00:00:49 ◼   ► would cause you to question all those [TS]

00:00:50 ◼   ► things that you think you've already [TS]

00:00:51 ◼   ► figured out with it [TS]

00:00:53 ◼   ► yeah like do I want to be on a naked [TS]

00:00:56 ◼   ► man's lap mmm I bet that's a question [TS]

00:00:58 ◼   ► you didn't think you were gonna have to [TS]

00:01:00 ◼   ► ask yourself today i woke up a ladder [TS]

00:01:02 ◼   ► know what 3-4 hours ago and have to be [TS]

00:01:04 ◼   ► honestly there are a lot of questions I [TS]

00:01:05 ◼   ► had [TS]

00:01:06 ◼   ► and as you do and first thing in the [TS]

00:01:08 ◼   ► morning yeah you know when I went in the [TS]

00:01:09 ◼   ► room with that chair i was super [TS]

00:01:11 ◼   ► cautious about it I i never got real [TS]

00:01:14 ◼   ► near the chair i use I i like to use a [TS]

00:01:17 ◼   ► an intermediary layer like a towel [TS]

00:01:22 ◼   ► around your gonna make me bring up our [TS]

00:01:24 ◼   ► heels again are you don't bring up our [TS]

00:01:26 ◼   ► he put paper towels and paper towels and [TS]

00:01:28 ◼   ► toilet paper on everything you know what [TS]

00:01:30 ◼   ► I'm i live in the northwest and i [TS]

00:01:32 ◼   ► conserve paper towels i use washable [TS]

00:01:35 ◼   ► towels between me and everything is [TS]

00:01:39 ◼   ► ending LOL you did you know you know how [TS]

00:01:42 ◼   ► much disease could be carried on those [TS]

00:01:44 ◼   ► but that but i would just be carrying it [TS]

00:01:47 ◼   ► right down to the Washington it's your [TS]

00:01:49 ◼   ► disease for one right party now as far [TS]

00:01:52 ◼   ► as i know this is starting to sound like [TS]

00:01:53 ◼   ► billy corgan lyrics [TS]

00:01:56 ◼   ► what do you think of that drummer who [TS]

00:02:02 ◼   ► cares yeah that's smashing pumpkins suit [TS]

00:02:05 ◼   ► cares man you know if you ever have [TS]

00:02:06 ◼   ► serious they were always so serious I i [TS]

00:02:09 ◼   ► had there was a guy when I was i I just [TS]

00:02:12 ◼   ► went down this list i was about to say [TS]

00:02:13 ◼   ► he was my mental list like in terminator [TS]

00:02:15 ◼   ► where say fuck you asshole [TS]

00:02:18 ◼   ► could this list i was about to say he [TS]

00:02:20 ◼   ► was my roommate and I was like oh [TS]

00:02:21 ◼   ► actually I didn't live in that house i [TS]

00:02:23 ◼   ► was just crashing on the couch and then [TS]

00:02:25 ◼   ► I realized he didn't live in that house [TS]

00:02:26 ◼   ► either he's just crashing on the couch [TS]

00:02:28 ◼   ► too [TS]

00:02:29 ◼   ► neither of us were we weren't actually [TS]

00:02:30 ◼   ► roommate but we lived in the same house [TS]

00:02:32 ◼   ► for a long it should be a stickler for [TS]

00:02:33 ◼   ► that the two guys co-host the two guys [TS]

00:02:36 ◼   ► that did live in the house i'm sure if [TS]

00:02:38 ◼   ► they were listening to this podcast [TS]

00:02:39 ◼   ► they'd be like god those two guys like [TS]

00:02:41 ◼   ► those guys but this guy David and I both [TS]

00:02:44 ◼   ► were crashing in this house for a time [TS]

00:02:46 ◼   ► and I was starting to play music you [TS]

00:02:48 ◼   ► know justjust then you know early [TS]

00:02:50 ◼   ► nineties and he was playing the smashing [TS]

00:02:54 ◼   ► pumpkins gifts at one point and I walked [TS]

00:02:57 ◼   ► in to him it wasn't his room plus [TS]

00:03:00 ◼   ► another guy's room and walked into the [TS]

00:03:02 ◼   ► room where he was and I was like this [TS]

00:03:05 ◼   ► music I don't know not that good and he [TS]

00:03:09 ◼   ► said eternity and very seriously he was [TS]

00:03:11 ◼   ► like never in your life will you ever [TS]

00:03:14 ◼   ► make a thing as wonderful as true as [TS]

00:03:19 ◼   ► smashing pumpkins gish em and I was like [TS]

00:03:22 ◼   ► well consider that a challenge [TS]

00:03:26 ◼   ► mmm is that something is that some here [TS]

00:03:28 ◼   ► to live with yeah I'm still not sure if [TS]

00:03:30 ◼   ► I have I still I'm still not sure if i [TS]

00:03:32 ◼   ► have if I've accomplished smashing [TS]

00:03:36 ◼   ► pumpkins gifts level of artistic [TS]

00:03:39 ◼   ► greatness like yeah I like that one part [TS]

00:03:42 ◼   ► of that one song goes out about a bomb [TS]

00:03:46 ◼   ► and the rest of the bend I like the bend [TS]

00:03:48 ◼   ► and then his voice is like oh what a [TS]

00:03:50 ◼   ► woman using his extraordinary he's a [TS]

00:03:53 ◼   ► classic is a classic example of it of a [TS]

00:03:55 ◼   ► nineties eighties and nineties singer [TS]

00:03:57 ◼   ► who made his career michael stipe is [TS]

00:04:00 ◼   ► another one who made his career having [TS]

00:04:02 ◼   ► unintelligible vocals mixed really low [TS]

00:04:04 ◼   ► who and then at a certain point he got [TS]

00:04:06 ◼   ► famous and people were telling him how [TS]

00:04:08 ◼   ► great he was and then he started going [TS]

00:04:10 ◼   ► into the studio in the same mix my [TS]

00:04:12 ◼   ► vocals up and oh yeah and also you know [TS]

00:04:15 ◼   ► rough time the the vocals come up next [TS]

00:04:17 ◼   ► shave their head to thank you [TS]

00:04:19 ◼   ► hello them so the locals come up ahead [TS]

00:04:22 ◼   ► get shaved and then all of a sudden the [TS]

00:04:24 ◼   ► fans are like wait a minute you're not [TS]

00:04:26 ◼   ► saying anything you're just reading the [TS]

00:04:27 ◼   ► ingredients off the back of a cereal box [TS]

00:04:29 ◼   ► or is this is meaningless like Michael [TS]

00:04:31 ◼   ► stripes lyrics were so enigmatic to me [TS]

00:04:34 ◼   ► through the eighties and then as soon as [TS]

00:04:36 ◼   ► he started a [TS]

00:04:37 ◼   ► as soon as you can hear them I was like [TS]

00:04:39 ◼   ► these are enigmatic these are these are [TS]

00:04:41 ◼   ► dumb ass and then billy corgan was never [TS]

00:04:44 ◼   ► any matter to me but but as soon as I [TS]

00:04:46 ◼   ► could hear it better I realized he's a [TS]

00:04:48 ◼   ► bad singer he and i think he boy right [TS]

00:04:52 ◼   ► yeah hate to speak ill of somebody from [TS]

00:04:53 ◼   ► Illinois but I i think i think he really [TS]

00:04:57 ◼   ► appeals to a certain type em I do idea [TS]

00:05:00 ◼   ► was well I don't know here's the thing [TS]

00:05:02 ◼   ► he loves food [TS]

00:05:04 ◼   ► LARPers haha do you remember that sure [TS]

00:05:08 ◼   ► this is zero he didn't he had a star [TS]

00:05:12 ◼   ► he became like Charlie Brown now I mean [TS]

00:05:13 ◼   ► in addition to being bald you can always [TS]

00:05:15 ◼   ► wear the same shirt and was always a [TS]

00:05:16 ◼   ► little bit sad you know and tall guy I [TS]

00:05:19 ◼   ► think oh you sure about that i think [TS]

00:05:21 ◼   ► that that's that lady the sad lady on [TS]

00:05:23 ◼   ► the base was tall I thought she was [TS]

00:05:26 ◼   ► small I don't know about the what about [TS]

00:05:27 ◼   ► the way to go to tweak what about the [TS]

00:05:29 ◼   ► little guy but he seemed pretty sad too [TS]

00:05:31 ◼   ► he has solo record i remember the little [TS]

00:05:32 ◼   ► guy yeah one of those guys died of [TS]

00:05:35 ◼   ► heroin no heroin [TS]

00:05:37 ◼   ► well somebody are you sure i think so i [TS]

00:05:40 ◼   ► have a ticket on the pretenders no no I [TS]

00:05:43 ◼   ► have somebody from every man died of [TS]

00:05:45 ◼   ► heroin but i'm pretty sure the summer I [TS]

00:05:46 ◼   ► somebody from this man died of heroin [TS]

00:05:48 ◼   ► whose that's nothing [TS]

00:05:50 ◼   ► the cloud know that heroin never funny [TS]

00:05:52 ◼   ► heroin is in the category of rape and [TS]

00:05:54 ◼   ► America rules anyway let's talk about [TS]

00:05:58 ◼   ► the William cat program from the early [TS]

00:05:59 ◼   ► eighties I'm sorry I even brought it up [TS]

00:06:01 ◼   ► but there's a great story of billy [TS]

00:06:03 ◼   ► corgan in the studio and he was [TS]

00:06:05 ◼   ► auditioning drummers after i guess maybe [TS]

00:06:07 ◼   ► as drummer died of heroin or maybe his [TS]

00:06:09 ◼   ► drummer kick down like this up but but [TS]

00:06:12 ◼   ► but anyway he was auditioning drummers [TS]

00:06:13 ◼   ► and he he was auditioning like famous [TS]

00:06:18 ◼   ► drummers and when they would sit there [TS]

00:06:22 ◼   ► that he would come into the room maybe [TS]

00:06:24 ◼   ► they're at their kit like ready to [TS]

00:06:25 ◼   ► rehearse are ready to audition and he [TS]

00:06:28 ◼   ► would refer to them as drummer [TS]

00:06:30 ◼   ► oh really drummer let's play that one [TS]

00:06:33 ◼   ► more time drummer let's can you do that [TS]

00:06:34 ◼   ► a little bit slower next like the way [TS]

00:06:36 ◼   ► you refer to your show for his driver i [TS]

00:06:38 ◼   ► believe so i think it's okay to refer to [TS]

00:06:41 ◼   ► someone who's not in the room with the [TS]

00:06:45 ◼   ► is the definite article it is not cool [TS]

00:06:48 ◼   ► to remove the definite [TS]

00:06:50 ◼   ► article when the person you're speaking [TS]

00:06:52 ◼   ► to the person [TS]

00:06:53 ◼   ► yeah I don't think that's that's not [TS]

00:06:54 ◼   ► appropriate somebody's painting your [TS]

00:06:56 ◼   ► house you don't go outside and say [TS]

00:06:57 ◼   ► painter I want you to i mean i don't [TS]

00:07:00 ◼   ► know i want a couple people that couple [TS]

00:07:02 ◼   ► people in Northwest bands who might do [TS]

00:07:05 ◼   ► that [TS]

00:07:05 ◼   ► water water my flight boards to speak in [TS]

00:07:10 ◼   ► 35 minutes [TS]

00:07:11 ◼   ► just give me a light boarding we're [TS]

00:07:13 ◼   ► getting very close to call it the [TS]

00:07:14 ◼   ► territory now haha open but these are [TS]

00:07:20 ◼   ► the videos opener but he never referred [TS]

00:07:23 ◼   ► to me as opener but i think it was [TS]

00:07:24 ◼   ► because there was the heat it even [TS]

00:07:27 ◼   ► through all of his condescension to me [TS]

00:07:28 ◼   ► there was enough there was enough just [TS]

00:07:30 ◼   ► native fear and I was gonna eat his face [TS]

00:07:33 ◼   ► yeah some summer 1996 according to this [TS]

00:07:35 ◼   ► very old web page is the keyboardist [TS]

00:07:37 ◼   ► from the band smashing pumpkins you do [TS]

00:07:39 ◼   ► not have like foo fighters do not have a [TS]

00:07:41 ◼   ► definite article on their name [TS]

00:07:43 ◼   ► keyboardist keep talking about a para [TS]

00:07:45 ◼   ► one you know all the keyboard is almost [TS]

00:07:47 ◼   ► never a real member of the band after [TS]

00:07:49 ◼   ► about 19 gonna say after what was his [TS]

00:07:54 ◼   ► name jonathan cain i'm going to say [TS]

00:07:56 ◼   ► after journey there weren't that many [TS]

00:07:58 ◼   ► people unless it was the primary [TS]

00:08:00 ◼   ► interesting and is instrumentalist like [TS]

00:08:02 ◼   ► the great Billy Joel there are not that [TS]

00:08:04 ◼   ► many people i kid i kid i kid i'm comin [TS]

00:08:07 ◼   ► around comin around a little um yeah the [TS]

00:08:10 ◼   ► guy who played his keyboard literally [TS]

00:08:14 ◼   ► fastened to the outside of a warehouse [TS]

00:08:15 ◼   ► building in that famous video [TS]

00:08:18 ◼   ► dun dun dun and dun dun dun and I know [TS]

00:08:21 ◼   ► they're talking about with the shaking [TS]

00:08:22 ◼   ► your fist at the camera yeah the fish [TS]

00:08:24 ◼   ► acres boy that video was tough to watch [TS]

00:08:27 ◼   ► and had sleeveless shirts for of the [TS]

00:08:30 ◼   ► time you know Jonathan can you know [TS]

00:08:32 ◼   ► Jonathan Cain I think he's got the [TS]

00:08:33 ◼   ► writing credit a big writing credit on [TS]

00:08:35 ◼   ► open arms memory serves [TS]

00:08:36 ◼   ► oh well I think he's a great musician [TS]

00:08:38 ◼   ► yeah you know who you know who has a lot [TS]

00:08:41 ◼   ► of dead keyboard players is the Grateful [TS]

00:08:42 ◼   ► Dead is that right all that pic then [TS]

00:08:45 ◼   ► pick them right and then also some [TS]

00:08:47 ◼   ► peanuts character i'll mention in [TS]

00:08:48 ◼   ► passing [TS]

00:08:49 ◼   ► yeah he he did not make it all the way [TS]

00:08:51 ◼   ► and and then their keyboard player later [TS]

00:08:54 ◼   ► from the from the seventies and eighties [TS]

00:08:57 ◼   ► who also died of the heroin [TS]

00:09:01 ◼   ► then i speaking of REM didn't they [TS]

00:09:03 ◼   ► briefly have an undead keyboard player [TS]

00:09:04 ◼   ► brett midland was the keyboard player of [TS]

00:09:10 ◼   ► the the grateful dead and he died when I [TS]

00:09:12 ◼   ► was that he died right at the time there [TS]

00:09:15 ◼   ► was a brief moment in my life when I [TS]

00:09:16 ◼   ► socialized interacted with socially [TS]

00:09:19 ◼   ► deadheads really huh [TS]

00:09:23 ◼   ► and i'm going to say that this was the [TS]

00:09:24 ◼   ► summer of nineteen ninety the summer of [TS]

00:09:28 ◼   ► nineteen ninety when i was living in [TS]

00:09:29 ◼   ► Washington DC and I went through a brief [TS]

00:09:30 ◼   ► period where I when I was socializing [TS]

00:09:34 ◼   ► with grateful dead people because i was [TS]

00:09:36 ◼   ► working for ralph nader at the time in [TS]

00:09:39 ◼   ► Washington DC and I had a lot of his [TS]

00:09:43 ◼   ► volunteered [TS]

00:09:44 ◼   ► ok that anyway that right at that time [TS]

00:09:48 ◼   ► brent midland died of heroin and and he [TS]

00:09:52 ◼   ► was a mean and and I had understood [TS]

00:09:55 ◼   ► understood the grateful dead for many [TS]

00:09:57 ◼   ► years I i knew i knew a lot about them [TS]

00:10:00 ◼   ► but he was he was not a Kanaan goal for [TS]

00:10:03 ◼   ► me member of the band like he was he was [TS]

00:10:06 ◼   ► like o.o who like the guy the bearded [TS]

00:10:08 ◼   ► guy over make sure but he died and and [TS]

00:10:11 ◼   ► all these people like these girls that I [TS]

00:10:13 ◼   ► kind of was wondering about whether [TS]

00:10:15 ◼   ► maybe you know what maybe we could we [TS]

00:10:18 ◼   ► could have a thing maybe we would take a [TS]

00:10:19 ◼   ► long motorcycle ride or whatever and [TS]

00:10:21 ◼   ► they were all crying like crying real [TS]

00:10:23 ◼   ► tears of sorrow at the death of brent [TS]

00:10:26 ◼   ► Midland and and i realized that i could [TS]

00:10:30 ◼   ► never I could never be a full grateful [TS]

00:10:32 ◼   ► dead person because I didn't have this I [TS]

00:10:35 ◼   ► didn't my feelings are not that strong [TS]

00:10:36 ◼   ► about about the about newly keyboard [TS]

00:10:39 ◼   ► well I mean I never I mean that guy was [TS]

00:10:41 ◼   ► i as far as i can tell he never said a [TS]

00:10:43 ◼   ► word interviews he was just like cipher [TS]

00:10:47 ◼   ► i'm doing a little bit of last minute [TS]

00:10:49 ◼   ► research because I think I may have [TS]

00:10:50 ◼   ► found something a little bit troubling [TS]

00:10:51 ◼   ► there's a pretty good chance for [TS]

00:10:53 ◼   ► Republicans have to cut this out [TS]

00:10:55 ◼   ► it seems to me first of all the Grateful [TS]

00:10:57 ◼   ► Dead part of problems their songs have [TS]

00:10:59 ◼   ► never ended [TS]

00:11:00 ◼   ► they're all going on somewhere that's [TS]

00:11:01 ◼   ► probably separate topic it seems to me [TS]

00:11:03 ◼   ► the keyboard players are usually the one [TS]

00:11:05 ◼   ► who dies in the Grateful Dead they have [TS]

00:11:09 ◼   ► had at least this is an old joke like [TS]

00:11:11 ◼   ► drummers are dumb like this is it just [TS]

00:11:13 ◼   ► me or do keyboard players just fucking [TS]

00:11:14 ◼   ► die [TS]

00:11:15 ◼   ► I every keyboard player but the Grateful [TS]

00:11:17 ◼   ► Dead had a lot of keyboard players [TS]

00:11:18 ◼   ► including i might add Bruce Hornsby huh [TS]

00:11:22 ◼   ► but who is not dead as far as i know but [TS]

00:11:25 ◼   ► I you know I imagined having been a [TS]

00:11:28 ◼   ► keyboard player in a band that was the [TS]

00:11:29 ◼   ► keyboard player and harvey danger before [TS]

00:11:31 ◼   ► before my my big bases are either watch [TS]

00:11:33 ◼   ► your ass buddy [TS]

00:11:34 ◼   ► well but this is the thing you sit [TS]

00:11:36 ◼   ► behind the keyboard it's a thankless job [TS]

00:11:38 ◼   ► you can't you can't get up [TS]

00:11:40 ◼   ► there's nothing exciting about right i [TS]

00:11:41 ◼   ► mean the band is it even in the moment [TS]

00:11:43 ◼   ► even in the band's peak moment at the [TS]

00:11:46 ◼   ► top of the set where you're just like [TS]

00:11:47 ◼   ► flying and your you guys are just [TS]

00:11:49 ◼   ► playing the plan your absolute playing [TS]

00:11:52 ◼   ► your number-one hit you are sitting [TS]

00:11:54 ◼   ► behind a desk [TS]

00:11:55 ◼   ► mm there's no other way to look at it [TS]

00:11:56 ◼   ► and so all the attempts that the [TS]

00:11:59 ◼   ► keyboard player might make like standing [TS]

00:12:01 ◼   ► up or kicking over his chair or being [TS]

00:12:03 ◼   ► Billy Joel or fastening your keyboard to [TS]

00:12:05 ◼   ► the side of a warehousing none of those [TS]

00:12:07 ◼   ► things can take away that the the like [TS]

00:12:12 ◼   ► incontrovertible truth that you are a [TS]

00:12:15 ◼   ► man behind a desk [TS]

00:12:15 ◼   ► even if you even if you have if i may [TS]

00:12:17 ◼   ► say a quitar that's really more of the [TS]

00:12:19 ◼   ► other the desktop are it's a desktop [TS]

00:12:22 ◼   ► you're just a guy standing up at a desk [TS]

00:12:23 ◼   ► and I don't know if you if you saw the [TS]

00:12:25 ◼   ► you saw the queens of the stone age when [TS]

00:12:28 ◼   ► they had the female keyboard player who [TS]

00:12:30 ◼   ► had worked up a keyboard stand where the [TS]

00:12:33 ◼   ► keyboard was actually like teetering [TS]

00:12:35 ◼   ► forward sonic so you could see her licks [TS]

00:12:40 ◼   ► you can see her licks and she was [TS]

00:12:41 ◼   ► playing like like over the top of this [TS]

00:12:43 ◼   ► thing it was the weirdest looking [TS]

00:12:44 ◼   ► keyboard stand and she was a cute coffee [TS]

00:12:47 ◼   ► girl and they were hard rock band he [TS]

00:12:49 ◼   ► never saw this i think that was standing [TS]

00:12:51 ◼   ► at a desk i'll be damned and you know [TS]

00:12:53 ◼   ► the thing I think you're onto something [TS]

00:12:54 ◼   ► here I think there are now what about [TS]

00:12:56 ◼   ► what about drummers do you think do you [TS]

00:12:59 ◼   ► think drumming is a desk [TS]

00:13:00 ◼   ► oh interesting because here's why I'm [TS]

00:13:03 ◼   ► gonna give you some examples well first [TS]

00:13:04 ◼   ► of all let's cover the obvious ground [TS]

00:13:06 ◼   ► here it's a desk of cans [TS]

00:13:07 ◼   ► it's a desk cans hmm now i know now the [TS]

00:13:11 ◼   ► thing is there have been many people [TS]

00:13:13 ◼   ► have tried to address this problem [TS]

00:13:14 ◼   ► trying to remember some specifics here [TS]

00:13:15 ◼   ► now as you say this this queens of the [TS]

00:13:17 ◼   ► stone age lady had a how-to [TS]

00:13:19 ◼   ► forward-leaning one I feel like guess [TS]

00:13:21 ◼   ► I've seen key Tars I just I just don't [TS]

00:13:23 ◼   ► understand I mean that did that the [TS]

00:13:24 ◼   ► indignity of a quitar I mean that that's [TS]

00:13:26 ◼   ► like a tar and feathering when it comes [TS]

00:13:28 ◼   ► to being in a band [TS]

00:13:29 ◼   ► I mean how do you choose QC please hand [TS]

00:13:31 ◼   ► me the keytar I don't think I think if [TS]

00:13:33 ◼   ► it get on armour llamar big on the [TS]

00:13:35 ◼   ► keytar if you and I were younger [TS]

00:13:37 ◼   ► uh-huh if we were 23 years old and we [TS]

00:13:39 ◼   ► were both right now let's say I was [TS]

00:13:41 ◼   ► wearing white bar days and you were [TS]

00:13:43 ◼   ► wearing some sunglasses that you got for [TS]

00:13:45 ◼   ► free from a bank check and we were [TS]

00:13:49 ◼   ► starting a band that was a pastiche of a [TS]

00:13:52 ◼   ► tease disco-pop and nineties indie rock [TS]

00:13:57 ◼   ► and I don't know what the kids any a pop [TS]

00:13:59 ◼   ► hip-hop here's our band and one of and [TS]

00:14:02 ◼   ► there's there's one quitar and you and I [TS]

00:14:05 ◼   ► have to flip for who plays it [TS]

00:14:07 ◼   ► okay i think is it is it is it fixed [TS]

00:14:10 ◼   ► corners at the fair calling i think it's [TS]

00:14:12 ◼   ► a fair corn and I i think i think we [TS]

00:14:14 ◼   ► would be I think the person who didn't [TS]

00:14:16 ◼   ► get the keytar would be disappointed if [TS]

00:14:18 ◼   ► we were 2300 you're saying you're 20 [TS]

00:14:21 ◼   ► teaching 23 in period i think especially [TS]

00:14:24 ◼   ► let's be honest especially not home i [TS]

00:14:26 ◼   ► couldn't i do this thing that I know for [TS]

00:14:28 ◼   ► comments by this thing I called The [TS]

00:14:29 ◼   ► Wolverine cord because what you know [TS]

00:14:31 ◼   ► over he's got these three claws I can [TS]

00:14:32 ◼   ► play on actually talked about this is [TS]

00:14:33 ◼   ► your home should i can place nicht I can [TS]

00:14:36 ◼   ► play almost any cool i complete half [TS]

00:14:41 ◼   ► Bell no one should get angry but calm [TS]

00:14:46 ◼   ► and you know i showed you this changes i [TS]

00:14:49 ◼   ► can play almost any major minor or [TS]

00:14:51 ◼   ► suspended 4th chord as long as you can [TS]

00:14:53 ◼   ► see with my three hand fingers on my [TS]

00:14:55 ◼   ► right hand so any any suspended chord as [TS]

00:14:58 ◼   ► long as it's in see well I you know like [TS]

00:15:01 ◼   ► everyone as you know I prefer ad [TS]

00:15:03 ◼   ► suspended 4th but i would need to have I [TS]

00:15:06 ◼   ► think it's called I things which are the [TS]

00:15:08 ◼   ► cold calls concert tuning I have to [TS]

00:15:09 ◼   ► reconstitute down to dr drop DSA [TS]

00:15:12 ◼   ► Jonathan Jonathan Coulton [TS]

00:15:13 ◼   ► explain explain that to me and I still [TS]

00:15:15 ◼   ► don't really understand it [TS]

00:15:17 ◼   ► yeah and if you are a much better guitar [TS]

00:15:19 ◼   ► player than you let on [TS]

00:15:20 ◼   ► mm I think you've actually taught my god [TS]

00:15:22 ◼   ► that's such a nice thing to say John I [TS]

00:15:24 ◼   ► thought you that little country thing [TS]

00:15:27 ◼   ► right [TS]

00:15:27 ◼   ► yeah but watching you play the guitar it [TS]

00:15:29 ◼   ► you have the you have that quality that [TS]

00:15:31 ◼   ► a that I IC kind of very seldom or a [TS]

00:15:35 ◼   ► person with an artistic impulse picks up [TS]

00:15:37 ◼   ► an instrument teaches it to themselves [TS]

00:15:38 ◼   ► and they come up with something that no [TS]

00:15:42 ◼   ► one else would have thought of [TS]

00:15:43 ◼   ► Oh like eating like playing my DS [TS]

00:15:45 ◼   ► backwards because i learned from fake [TS]

00:15:46 ◼   ► books [TS]

00:15:47 ◼   ► yeah or or just kind of your approach to [TS]

00:15:49 ◼   ► the instrument it's like oh this is this [TS]

00:15:51 ◼   ► is interesting i'm watching this now and [TS]

00:15:53 ◼   ► I'm seeing something I haven't seen [TS]

00:15:54 ◼   ► anything it's a different approach to [TS]

00:15:55 ◼   ► you use memory serves you started on [TS]

00:15:57 ◼   ► tennis rackets playing along to except [TS]

00:15:59 ◼   ► British steel I by started on tennis [TS]

00:16:01 ◼   ► rackets and then I've told you this [TS]

00:16:02 ◼   ► story and I when I went to a punk rock [TS]

00:16:04 ◼   ► show and it was one of those shows in [TS]

00:16:06 ◼   ► anchorage in the early eighties where [TS]

00:16:09 ◼   ► there were five bands on the bill and [TS]

00:16:11 ◼   ► between all five bands that was one [TS]

00:16:14 ◼   ► person who had never seen an instrument [TS]

00:16:16 ◼   ► before or it could do anything with it [TS]

00:16:17 ◼   ► was just it was just a DIY it was at the [TS]

00:16:20 ◼   ► youth center and it was just a pure [TS]

00:16:22 ◼   ► racket about that one of the bands came [TS]

00:16:26 ◼   ► out on stage and the guitar player like [TS]

00:16:27 ◼   ► smashed his guitar all over the place [TS]

00:16:29 ◼   ► and I Iran up after the after their set [TS]

00:16:34 ◼   ► and grab the neck of his guitar and and [TS]

00:16:38 ◼   ► I honestly it was like it was like Eric [TS]

00:16:40 ◼   ► Clapton had given me his his prized [TS]

00:16:43 ◼   ► Black stratocaster that how much I [TS]

00:16:45 ◼   ► prized this broken neck from Ann Arbor [TS]

00:16:48 ◼   ► that was an arbor Explorer copy or [TS]

00:16:53 ◼   ► something like that like to this neck [TS]

00:16:54 ◼   ► home and I now I had a real guitar neck [TS]

00:16:57 ◼   ► and this is the first kind of guitar [TS]

00:16:58 ◼   ► anything I had a second Holocaust [TS]

00:17:00 ◼   ► keyboards doesn't make any sound you [TS]

00:17:02 ◼   ► practice on it but it doesn't make a [TS]

00:17:03 ◼   ► noise and I have here here it was this [TS]

00:17:06 ◼   ► this Mecca was a real neck and so I [TS]

00:17:09 ◼   ► tried for a while to like air guitar [TS]

00:17:11 ◼   ► just with the neck of the guitar but i [TS]

00:17:14 ◼   ► found it insufficient that's like [TS]

00:17:16 ◼   ► masturbating with just your balls hang [TS]

00:17:20 ◼   ► you know i could write that if I haven't [TS]

00:17:21 ◼   ► tried ready for a change in a minute [TS]

00:17:23 ◼   ► just anyway so I went out to the garage [TS]

00:17:25 ◼   ► at one point and I [TS]

00:17:27 ◼   ► found an old chess board and i took the [TS]

00:17:31 ◼   ► chessboard and I attached the guitar [TS]

00:17:33 ◼   ► next to like it thick wooden heavy chest [TS]

00:17:36 ◼   ► just bored right and I and I screwed i [TS]

00:17:38 ◼   ► took took this screwdriver and I screwed [TS]

00:17:40 ◼   ► this guitar neck into the chessboard [TS]

00:17:43 ◼   ► accept because you remember this is the [TS]

00:17:45 ◼   ► early eighties where checkerboard was a [TS]

00:17:48 ◼   ► very popular motif and I screwed the [TS]

00:17:51 ◼   ► neck of the guitar into this into this [TS]

00:17:54 ◼   ► checker chessboard but i put i put it [TS]

00:17:56 ◼   ► and I put it at a at an angle so that [TS]

00:17:59 ◼   ► the guitar was actually a diamond shape [TS]

00:18:02 ◼   ► haha man writes right and then I had a [TS]

00:18:06 ◼   ► home-made air guitar that was no I was [TS]

00:18:11 ◼   ► better than a tennis racket because no [TS]

00:18:12 ◼   ► one had one that looked like this and [TS]

00:18:15 ◼   ► and I air guitar too many many many a ZZ [TS]

00:18:19 ◼   ► top song with that thing before I [TS]

00:18:21 ◼   ► decided that it was time to learn how to [TS]

00:18:23 ◼   ► play the guitar [TS]

00:18:24 ◼   ► I you know what in its own really [TS]

00:18:28 ◼   ► twisted way I think that's kind of [TS]

00:18:29 ◼   ► healthy and interesting didn't do you [TS]

00:18:31 ◼   ► think I mean more so more so than if you [TS]

00:18:32 ◼   ► just stuck with a tennis racket [TS]

00:18:34 ◼   ► you know what I mean you would be doing [TS]

00:18:35 ◼   ► a pretty standard like John Hughes movie [TS]

00:18:38 ◼   ► way to learn guitar right in your case I [TS]

00:18:41 ◼   ► think you're going a little bit more [TS]

00:18:42 ◼   ► backwoods and I really respect that i [TS]

00:18:44 ◼   ► made my first instrument even though it [TS]

00:18:46 ◼   ► was not actually an instrument it was a [TS]

00:18:48 ◼   ► fake instrument but anyhow what Les Paul [TS]

00:18:50 ◼   ► started maybe less bass guitars didn't [TS]

00:18:51 ◼   ► make sound first interesting thought [TS]

00:18:54 ◼   ► let's get you gotta start somewhere [TS]

00:18:55 ◼   ► right right I like that idea well I mean [TS]

00:18:57 ◼   ► this guitar and heft it had a real next [TS]

00:19:00 ◼   ► something i could run my hands up and [TS]

00:19:01 ◼   ► down and feel the frets underneath it [TS]

00:19:03 ◼   ► and and that you know it felt very [TS]

00:19:06 ◼   ► individual let's see what my top air [TS]

00:19:09 ◼   ► guitar records were littered Skynyrd's [TS]

00:19:11 ◼   ► golden platinum that's a greatest hits [TS]

00:19:13 ◼   ► double album know [TS]

00:19:14 ◼   ► this was these are these are vinyl [TS]

00:19:16 ◼   ► records of course who uh let's see what [TS]

00:19:18 ◼   ► else did I your guitar a lot to Billy [TS]

00:19:21 ◼   ► Squires emotions emotions of course Van [TS]

00:19:26 ◼   ► Halen a women and children first palm an [TS]

00:19:30 ◼   ► great air guitar right that's the one [TS]

00:19:32 ◼   ► chain [TS]

00:19:34 ◼   ► yes oh my god and you know what I I'm [TS]

00:19:38 ◼   ► not afraid to say uh the Scorpions [TS]

00:19:40 ◼   ► worldwide live oh well why would you be [TS]

00:19:43 ◼   ► afraid to say that you know what I mean [TS]

00:19:44 ◼   ► that's a record that that's a record [TS]

00:19:45 ◼   ► that a lot of people don't listen to now [TS]

00:19:47 ◼   ► I said before the other night and her [TS]

00:19:48 ◼   ► can't live without you and I just kind [TS]

00:19:51 ◼   ► of naturally unconsciously I just [TS]

00:19:53 ◼   ► couldn't help but you started singing [TS]

00:19:54 ◼   ► along with the course you have to [TS]

00:19:55 ◼   ► because the scorpions are great and the [TS]

00:19:57 ◼   ► scorpions as you have said are the great [TS]

00:19:59 ◼   ► working men of the metal the great [TS]

00:20:01 ◼   ► working men of metal and and they're [TS]

00:20:04 ◼   ► Germans to boot the came to Alaska and [TS]

00:20:06 ◼   ► they gave what's that cloud not class- [TS]

00:20:08 ◼   ► uh not written shanker uh oh yeah [TS]

00:20:11 ◼   ► Mattias jobs he gave me the IDK yeah [TS]

00:20:13 ◼   ► that's right let's get this rocking his [TS]

00:20:16 ◼   ► corpse [TS]

00:20:16 ◼   ► I think you know what i did your this is [TS]

00:20:18 ◼   ► a lot of overlap here I was scared of [TS]

00:20:20 ◼   ► Judas Priest alright as you would be out [TS]

00:20:23 ◼   ► yeah yeah i mean like British steel that [TS]

00:20:25 ◼   ► was something like the bad kids and [TS]

00:20:26 ◼   ► denim jackets wrote on their folders if [TS]

00:20:27 ◼   ► they have folders London have folders [TS]

00:20:29 ◼   ► within trailer homes you know I met the [TS]

00:20:30 ◼   ► other day I met the guitar tech for Iron [TS]

00:20:32 ◼   ► Maiden [TS]

00:20:33 ◼   ► no way yeah I met about on the street in [TS]

00:20:35 ◼   ► Seattle during bumbershoot we think they [TS]

00:20:37 ◼   ► play the play at eight or nine that [TS]

00:20:40 ◼   ► probably pretty small though who knows [TS]

00:20:42 ◼   ► maybe there maybe they played 1307 these [TS]

00:20:46 ◼   ► guys have hands like oak trees i love [TS]

00:20:49 ◼   ► that steve harris Blacula second base [TS]

00:20:50 ◼   ► all day [TS]

00:20:51 ◼   ► he's amazing isn't it ok this guy this [TS]

00:20:54 ◼   ► is in the guitar tech was I have met a [TS]

00:20:56 ◼   ► lot of English a touring soundman guitar [TS]

00:21:00 ◼   ► tech that right people [TS]

00:21:01 ◼   ► yes I have and they all share a similar [TS]

00:21:04 ◼   ► character which is to say that they are [TS]

00:21:06 ◼   ► there like working very working-class [TS]

00:21:08 ◼   ► they're very no-nonsense and and that [TS]

00:21:13 ◼   ► they give off the picking off the air [TS]

00:21:15 ◼   ► that they're like tough guys like the [TS]

00:21:17 ◼   ► like the like fuck you kind of tough [TS]

00:21:20 ◼   ► tough tough dude stuff English guys who [TS]

00:21:22 ◼   ► but when you really you know get to meet [TS]

00:21:25 ◼   ► them you realize that their guitar tech [TS]

00:21:27 ◼   ► so that they could be very gentle with a [TS]

00:21:29 ◼   ► young girl [TS]

00:21:30 ◼   ► yeah they're functionally pussies who [TS]

00:21:32 ◼   ► but uh but they live in this like [TS]

00:21:35 ◼   ► rough-and-tumble world where they're [TS]

00:21:36 ◼   ► touring around they kind of bait they [TS]

00:21:38 ◼   ► adopt a manner of like interstate [TS]

00:21:40 ◼   ► truckers but in fact they're just tuning [TS]

00:21:42 ◼   ► guitars all day it's not like there no [TS]

00:21:44 ◼   ► knife but as you learned from i think [TS]

00:21:46 ◼   ► probably forty two percent of all ac/dc [TS]

00:21:49 ◼   ► songs it's very hard to be a touring [TS]

00:21:50 ◼   ► rock band [TS]

00:21:51 ◼   ► oh hello boy they got a lot of songs [TS]

00:21:54 ◼   ► about how hard it is to be in a [TS]

00:21:55 ◼   ► successful pant well because they were [TS]

00:21:57 ◼   ► getting new and more virulent strains of [TS]

00:22:00 ◼   ► herpes every night is that right yeah [TS]

00:22:02 ◼   ► that's why it was so hard being a CD [TS]

00:22:04 ◼   ► imagine how hard it would be to travel [TS]

00:22:06 ◼   ► with herpes [TS]

00:22:06 ◼   ► well or just like every night like oh my [TS]

00:22:09 ◼   ► herpes is killing me a menu planned what [TS]

00:22:11 ◼   ► happens if you get if you get if you get [TS]

00:22:13 ◼   ► a stress bump on your way [TS]

00:22:15 ◼   ► I think this is the color in Australia [TS]

00:22:17 ◼   ► you know what that does it opens you up [TS]

00:22:19 ◼   ► to another infection it's like you get a [TS]

00:22:21 ◼   ► wound you met a wound [TS]

00:22:22 ◼   ► all right now this is i I'm sorry to [TS]

00:22:24 ◼   ► take it here yeah but but the [TS]

00:22:26 ◼   ► conversation has naturally arrived here [TS]

00:22:29 ◼   ► ok this is not a thing that i am [TS]

00:22:30 ◼   ► introducing unnatural I didn't kiss [TS]

00:22:32 ◼   ► anybody bad but my understanding i just [TS]

00:22:35 ◼   ► learned this last night ok is that in [TS]

00:22:37 ◼   ► certain orthodox jewish communities the [TS]

00:22:41 ◼   ► the the rabbi who performs the [TS]

00:22:44 ◼   ► circumcision the amul actually performs [TS]

00:22:49 ◼   ► the last he uses a knife to cut the [TS]

00:22:51 ◼   ► foreskin he actually performs the last [TS]

00:22:53 ◼   ► portion of that ceremony with his mouth [TS]

00:22:57 ◼   ► and [TS]

00:23:02 ◼   ► this or you hm he jumped on you sure [TS]

00:23:06 ◼   ► this isn't one of those does make in [TS]

00:23:08 ◼   ► making babies in the mouth spread things [TS]

00:23:10 ◼   ► because this could cause us a lot of [TS]

00:23:11 ◼   ► trouble are you saying that this is this [TS]

00:23:13 ◼   ► is a protocol the elders of zion problem [TS]

00:23:16 ◼   ► no I heard this I bring you heard this [TS]

00:23:20 ◼   ► your business on the English ready for [TS]

00:23:22 ◼   ► this Lauren is the crazy problem in [TS]

00:23:25 ◼   ► God's with the year that you guys we put [TS]

00:23:29 ◼   ► his mouth right on round round the penis [TS]

00:23:32 ◼   ► I came to the next 90 min but in any [TS]

00:23:35 ◼   ► case the problem is that in New York [TS]

00:23:37 ◼   ► City seventy percent of all men have [TS]

00:23:39 ◼   ► herpes oh Jesus just a letter with the [TS]

00:23:43 ◼   ► fuck did you come up with that every [TS]

00:23:45 ◼   ► outlaw this practice or they're trying [TS]

00:23:47 ◼   ► to outlaw this practice because that is [TS]

00:23:49 ◼   ► a long walk through a discredited [TS]

00:23:51 ◼   ► university my grandma dies rabbis are [TS]

00:23:53 ◼   ► giving newborn babies herpes from the [TS]

00:23:55 ◼   ► mouse but i don't wanna try to make this [TS]

00:23:58 ◼   ► about Howard he's but this is the [TS]

00:24:00 ◼   ► problem with contagion contagion is [TS]

00:24:03 ◼   ► intelligence but this is the problem [TS]

00:24:04 ◼   ► with contagion it's also the problem of [TS]

00:24:06 ◼   ► hearing stuff from somebody and then [TS]

00:24:08 ◼   ► saying it on the interwebs huh [TS]

00:24:10 ◼   ► but you know what I'm going to have to [TS]

00:24:11 ◼   ► do I my first real clean my keyboard and [TS]

00:24:13 ◼   ► then I'm gonna do a lot of research and [TS]

00:24:15 ◼   ► probably cut almost all this out but [TS]

00:24:17 ◼   ► that's that's that's remarkably 677 out [TS]

00:24:20 ◼   ► of ten men in now is this in the in the [TS]

00:24:23 ◼   ► metropolitan new york area i'm going to [TS]

00:24:26 ◼   ► say that it's all of New York including [TS]

00:24:27 ◼   ► staten island all the borough's this [TS]

00:24:29 ◼   ► jonathan coulton know this is you know [TS]

00:24:31 ◼   ► this too well I don't know the people [TS]

00:24:33 ◼   ► that I travel a lot John if he does but [TS]

00:24:35 ◼   ► i but these are people in New York or [TS]

00:24:37 ◼   ► getting herpes in New York and they're [TS]

00:24:38 ◼   ► still getting herpes are people still [TS]

00:24:39 ◼   ► getting herpes John Kasich they are they [TS]

00:24:41 ◼   ► get it from the you know they read those [TS]

00:24:43 ◼   ► subways they're all close to each other [TS]

00:24:45 ◼   ► cocky you-know-what probably herpes is [TS]

00:24:47 ◼   ► probably going through there like like [TS]

00:24:49 ◼   ► like electricity through a Tesla coil [TS]

00:24:51 ◼   ► oh just from one end of the training [TS]

00:24:53 ◼   ► that I mean that's just--that's just [TS]

00:24:55 ◼   ► miserable now do you think that you have [TS]

00:24:56 ◼   ► any sense of the other ladies in the [TS]

00:24:58 ◼   ► metropolitan area give are they aware [TS]

00:25:00 ◼   ► they are they aware of this fact and B [TS]

00:25:02 ◼   ► are they taking precautions are they [TS]

00:25:03 ◼   ► staying off the subways in the Tesla [TS]

00:25:04 ◼   ► coils my senses that girls in New York [TS]

00:25:06 ◼   ► don't really make themselves available [TS]

00:25:08 ◼   ► for something mr. can women get her [TS]

00:25:10 ◼   ► pieces that dunno [TS]

00:25:11 ◼   ► I think okay legitimate her piece its [TS]

00:25:15 ◼   ► much it's much easier to get pregnant [TS]

00:25:17 ◼   ► ya nah if you're a woman than it is to [TS]

00:25:20 ◼   ► get her peace [TS]

00:25:21 ◼   ► okay um I would you know what seventeen [TS]

00:25:24 ◼   ► percent 70-percent John that is a lot of [TS]

00:25:27 ◼   ► percent that's even more than a [TS]

00:25:28 ◼   ► plurality it's alright that's a lot i am [TS]

00:25:31 ◼   ► that you would be that's enough to that [TS]

00:25:33 ◼   ► that's enough to overcome a filibuster [TS]

00:25:34 ◼   ► you know what W great new name for cold [TS]

00:25:37 ◼   ► sores and what would filibuster you can [TS]

00:25:42 ◼   ► see I got want to try to break this [TS]

00:25:43 ◼   ► filibuster I like that that it's [TS]

00:25:46 ◼   ► something [TS]

00:25:47 ◼   ► okay well moving on us so we've got [TS]

00:25:50 ◼   ► we've got you covered on the ground [TS]

00:25:53 ◼   ► already this entry I made a joke the [TS]

00:25:55 ◼   ► other day that that storming your [TS]

00:25:57 ◼   ► embassy was going to be my new my new [TS]

00:25:59 ◼   ► way of my new euphemism her having sex [TS]

00:26:02 ◼   ► with someone like you to break in and [TS]

00:26:06 ◼   ► then somebody on facebook was like give [TS]

00:26:10 ◼   ► me a lecture about the American heroes [TS]

00:26:11 ◼   ► dying overseas and now it wasn't funny [TS]

00:26:15 ◼   ► yeah well why don't you take this up [TS]

00:26:16 ◼   ► over on the pro and a forum [TS]

00:26:19 ◼   ► you're like a pro anna form that's a [TS]

00:26:21 ◼   ► rough ride haha oh god I wish I had a [TS]

00:26:24 ◼   ► cough button yeah off button my mind [TS]

00:26:27 ◼   ► where I'm going to say probably break [TS]

00:26:30 ◼   ► out by scorpions which I got to the [TS]

00:26:33 ◼   ► columbia music music organization i got [TS]

00:26:35 ◼   ► it let's see i would say definitely [TS]

00:26:37 ◼   ► blizzard of Oz blizzard of Oz what you [TS]

00:26:41 ◼   ► went to the Washington State Fair the [TS]

00:26:42 ◼   ► other day who and everywhere I went like [TS]

00:26:46 ◼   ► all the different all the different [TS]

00:26:48 ◼   ► f-fair things where you throw the the [TS]

00:26:50 ◼   ► darts at the balloons are you through [TS]

00:26:53 ◼   ► the hoops at the bottles or whatever [TS]

00:26:54 ◼   ► they were all playing different Ozzy [TS]

00:26:56 ◼   ► tracks to track people I guess I mean [TS]

00:27:00 ◼   ► they were playing Ozzy at the at the [TS]

00:27:01 ◼   ► state fair in 1980 and I'm just [TS]

00:27:05 ◼   ► wondering [TS]

00:27:05 ◼   ► it's been a long time since I've been to [TS]

00:27:07 ◼   ► a State Fair is Ozzy just like state [TS]

00:27:09 ◼   ► fair music you might be a wormhole you [TS]

00:27:12 ◼   ► might you might be in a Washington [TS]

00:27:13 ◼   ► wormhole you know I it is weird it is [TS]

00:27:15 ◼   ► weird that the these kinds of these [TS]

00:27:17 ◼   ► horrible horrible events just full of [TS]

00:27:19 ◼   ► terrible bad people have been around for [TS]

00:27:21 ◼   ► centuries right you get the 7000 right [TS]

00:27:24 ◼   ► come to town you got your maximum sit [TS]

00:27:25 ◼   ► out and you go around and play chess and [TS]

00:27:27 ◼   ► shit like that has been around forever [TS]

00:27:28 ◼   ► come into town and fucking shit up but [TS]

00:27:30 ◼   ► it is a funny thing that everything that [TS]

00:27:33 ◼   ► happens at one of these traveling fares [TS]

00:27:35 ◼   ► feels like it's happening somewhere [TS]

00:27:36 ◼   ► between making 72 in 1981 maybe I'm [TS]

00:27:39 ◼   ► right like carnies are stuck there [TS]

00:27:41 ◼   ► forever like what did they give away [TS]

00:27:43 ◼   ► before coke mirrors we covered this been [TS]

00:27:44 ◼   ► in a previous visit but it seems to me [TS]

00:27:46 ◼   ► that a lot of the prizes you've got [TS]

00:27:47 ◼   ► you've got stuffed animals that are [TS]

00:27:48 ◼   ► extremely hard [TS]

00:27:49 ◼   ► yeah we've ever felt stuffed animal from [TS]

00:27:51 ◼   ► a fair it's not the central question i [TS]

00:27:53 ◼   ► think i think it's tough with like [TS]

00:27:54 ◼   ► sawdust and you know like counterfeit [TS]

00:27:56 ◼   ► money or something [TS]

00:27:57 ◼   ► yeah well here are the things that have [TS]

00:27:59 ◼   ► drugs i bet a surprising number of them [TS]

00:28:01 ◼   ► have an amount of drugs in the people [TS]

00:28:03 ◼   ► forgot about it they have that I don't [TS]

00:28:04 ◼   ► think the drugs are inside but the dr [TS]

00:28:06 ◼   ► there's definitely drugs on the fur here [TS]

00:28:08 ◼   ► are the things that I saw for the first [TS]

00:28:10 ◼   ► time in a state fair [TS]

00:28:11 ◼   ► ok i saw a coke bottle that had been [TS]

00:28:13 ◼   ► heated up and X and pulled so that it [TS]

00:28:16 ◼   ► was like four feet tall [TS]

00:28:17 ◼   ► spooky remember that i still remember [TS]

00:28:19 ◼   ► that have a listen to how do they do [TS]

00:28:21 ◼   ► that [TS]

00:28:22 ◼   ► that's right and then I i saw the the [TS]

00:28:24 ◼   ► invisible dog where you have the have [TS]

00:28:28 ◼   ► the dog leash and then there's a harness [TS]

00:28:29 ◼   ► but it in but there's no dog in it you [TS]

00:28:32 ◼   ► know what I'm talking about idea perhaps [TS]

00:28:33 ◼   ► it's got the invisible doc invisible dog [TS]

00:28:35 ◼   ► I saw my first Coke mirror I saw my [TS]

00:28:37 ◼   ► first feathered ear rings / rotate [TS]

00:28:43 ◼   ► teehee roach clip roll clip earring that [TS]

00:28:46 ◼   ► these are before these are before you [TS]

00:28:48 ◼   ► could buy dreamcatchers on the open [TS]

00:28:49 ◼   ► market but there really is that they're [TS]

00:28:51 ◼   ► all that the Venn diagram is is really [TS]

00:28:54 ◼   ► exhausted i think when it comes to dream [TS]

00:28:56 ◼   ► catchers I think he moved straight from [TS]

00:28:58 ◼   ► feathered roach clip into a dreamcatcher [TS]

00:29:01 ◼   ► not just for once worked on I think [TS]

00:29:03 ◼   ► dream catchers don't work can you know [TS]

00:29:05 ◼   ► that for sure [TS]

00:29:06 ◼   ► well you ever seen the car and Western [TS]

00:29:07 ◼   ► countries are in that's true maybe [TS]

00:29:11 ◼   ► that's the bedroom catches supposed to [TS]

00:29:12 ◼   ► be writing worry dolls they're supposed [TS]

00:29:14 ◼   ► to be something where they let you catch [TS]

00:29:16 ◼   ► your dreams and let's all the bad [TS]

00:29:17 ◼   ► thoughts go through [TS]

00:29:18 ◼   ► oh i'm with you that when I would go to [TS]

00:29:20 ◼   ► those places even I always felt because [TS]

00:29:22 ◼   ► because I most words you used about [TS]

00:29:25 ◼   ► English pussies what you call them [TS]

00:29:26 ◼   ► I'm the roadies menifee I wasn't really [TS]

00:29:29 ◼   ► so many angry letters [TS]

00:29:30 ◼   ► yeah remember the quill pen given that [TS]

00:29:34 ◼   ► up now I would always feel a little bit [TS]

00:29:35 ◼   ► ministers is all kinds of the [TS]

00:29:36 ◼   ► you know we get obviously got a lot of [TS]

00:29:38 ◼   ► fried foods you get a lot of corn dogs [TS]

00:29:39 ◼   ► you get a lot of you know what I don't [TS]

00:29:42 ◼   ► ever saw have to get back to being a cop [TS]

00:29:45 ◼   ► button i remember on one occasion my [TS]

00:29:48 ◼   ► best friend John and I went to disney [TS]

00:29:50 ◼   ► world when i was about that have to be [TS]

00:29:52 ◼   ► about 13 or 14 and agents was entirely [TS]

00:29:54 ◼   ► inappropriate we had matching airbrushed [TS]

00:29:56 ◼   ► shirts with the cover of wolverine [TS]

00:29:58 ◼   ► number one on it and we don't say Merlyn [TS]

00:30:01 ◼   ► John remember Big they might have but [TS]

00:30:03 ◼   ► like on each other's BFF now we were too [TS]

00:30:07 ◼   ► we were to really awkward guys in [TS]

00:30:10 ◼   ► matching airbrushed t-shirts and we each [TS]

00:30:12 ◼   ► went to the magic shop and bought a [TS]

00:30:14 ◼   ► plastic faucet with a suction cup on it [TS]

00:30:16 ◼   ► and we'll alert word on foreheads for [TS]

00:30:18 ◼   ► the high i had that I never worked on my [TS]

00:30:20 ◼   ► forehead but I had it [TS]

00:30:22 ◼   ► John I know you're not a physiologist [TS]

00:30:24 ◼   ► but give a pretty good idea can you just [TS]

00:30:26 ◼   ► guess what happens when you wear a very [TS]

00:30:29 ◼   ► very powerful suction cup on your [TS]

00:30:30 ◼   ► forehead for nine hours you get a black [TS]

00:30:34 ◼   ► and blue giant a circle on your forehead [TS]

00:30:37 ◼   ► it's like a faucet a key like appointing [TS]

00:30:39 ◼   ► but I had suffered for seriously my hand [TS]

00:30:41 ◼   ► to God for really much really bad for [TS]

00:30:43 ◼   ► one day but for close to three days and [TS]

00:30:45 ◼   ► looks like somebody hit me on the head [TS]

00:30:46 ◼   ► with extreme precision and made a an [TS]

00:30:50 ◼   ► exact circle of purple on my head [TS]

00:30:52 ◼   ► Oh at that exact same age yeah i was [TS]

00:30:57 ◼   ► sitting in the lunch room at one point [TS]

00:30:58 ◼   ► and I had a I had a a cop a plastic cup [TS]

00:31:02 ◼   ► and I put it around my mouth and was [TS]

00:31:06 ◼   ► sucking all the air out of it to create [TS]

00:31:08 ◼   ► a vacuum at so that this cup was like [TS]

00:31:10 ◼   ► around mine around my nose and mouth I [TS]

00:31:12 ◼   ► guess right and i had i actually [TS]

00:31:15 ◼   ► appreciate you want to push it right [TS]

00:31:17 ◼   ► I wanted to push it push it all the way [TS]

00:31:18 ◼   ► and I had this black and blue circle [TS]

00:31:20 ◼   ► around my face it was the equivalent [TS]

00:31:23 ◼   ► really up love sticking your tongue to [TS]

00:31:26 ◼   ► up to a frozen pole that's such a duel [TS]

00:31:31 ◼   ► for 4 days after that I just had this [TS]

00:31:34 ◼   ► like there's nothing you can do you [TS]

00:31:36 ◼   ► can't stay home from school you know [TS]

00:31:37 ◼   ► it's not going to be any different you [TS]

00:31:39 ◼   ► know [TS]

00:31:39 ◼   ► remember the trick to get somebody [TS]

00:31:40 ◼   ► Hickey supposedly you can run a comb [TS]

00:31:42 ◼   ► over it every remember that trick [TS]

00:31:44 ◼   ► no I was a good i was a pretty big [TS]

00:31:46 ◼   ► Hickey giver I didn't realize I was [TS]

00:31:47 ◼   ► doing and I think I might have been been [TS]

00:31:49 ◼   ► possessed or something [TS]

00:31:50 ◼   ► I never gave a hickey and I wouldn't [TS]

00:31:51 ◼   ► allow somebody to give me a key in fact [TS]

00:31:53 ◼   ► to this day if somebody starts sucking [TS]

00:31:54 ◼   ► on my neck I'm okay [TS]

00:31:56 ◼   ► hey hey easy easy that because i was [TS]

00:31:59 ◼   ► that because of your perimeter because [TS]

00:32:01 ◼   ► your body is a temple what's the [TS]

00:32:02 ◼   ► thinking just don't enjoy it [TS]

00:32:04 ◼   ► alright so i was at a civil war Civil [TS]

00:32:06 ◼   ► Air Patrol encampment in about nineteen [TS]

00:32:10 ◼   ► eighty-one and this was a coed [TS]

00:32:13 ◼   ► encampment although there i have to say [TS]

00:32:15 ◼   ► there were not that many girls in the [TS]

00:32:17 ◼   ► Civil Air Patrol but there were some it [TS]

00:32:19 ◼   ► was that it was and it was a it was a [TS]

00:32:21 ◼   ► two-week-long encampment at Eielson Air [TS]

00:32:24 ◼   ► Force Base in Fairbanks Alaska and we [TS]

00:32:27 ◼   ► were occupied we were all staying in the [TS]

00:32:29 ◼   ► old build barracks that had been built [TS]

00:32:32 ◼   ► during world war two who and at one [TS]

00:32:35 ◼   ► point one of the guys got a hickey from [TS]

00:32:41 ◼   ► one of the girls and it was this [TS]

00:32:44 ◼   ► terrible purple welt and there was no [TS]

00:32:48 ◼   ► there was no disguising it because we're [TS]

00:32:51 ◼   ► in uniform you know where we're wearing [TS]

00:32:54 ◼   ► our dress blue uniforms you can't like [TS]

00:32:56 ◼   ► accessorize that with a scar me and I [TS]

00:32:58 ◼   ► like clean Elizabeth the first camp [TS]

00:33:00 ◼   ► no no we weren't we will get we weren't [TS]

00:33:03 ◼   ► in the in Elizabethan Air Force camp [TS]

00:33:06 ◼   ► Dickie camp and so he had to like stand [TS]

00:33:09 ◼   ► there at at at inspection in his blues [TS]

00:33:12 ◼   ► or what I guess inspection he was he [TS]

00:33:14 ◼   ► would have been in his fatigues but but [TS]

00:33:16 ◼   ► with this giant pulsating purple mess on [TS]

00:33:19 ◼   ► his neck and the UH the sergeant who of [TS]

00:33:24 ◼   ► course was also 13 years old [TS]

00:33:26 ◼   ► this is the inspecting they're expecting [TS]

00:33:29 ◼   ► off unconditioned officer [TS]

00:33:30 ◼   ► yeah the noncommissioned officer I mean [TS]

00:33:33 ◼   ► I was 11 and the guy with the he was [TS]

00:33:35 ◼   ► probably 13 let's say that lets say the [TS]

00:33:36 ◼   ► the sergeant was 15 just dressed him [TS]

00:33:39 ◼   ► down in front of everybody but [TS]

00:33:41 ◼   ► unprofessional and you know unmilitary [TS]

00:33:43 ◼   ► out of uniform all this type of thing [TS]

00:33:45 ◼   ► and it left a lasting impression on me [TS]

00:33:48 ◼   ► that if you got a hickey you would be [TS]

00:33:50 ◼   ► out of uniform there was no you you [TS]

00:33:53 ◼   ► could you could not be you could not be [TS]

00:33:55 ◼   ► in uniform with a hickey [TS]

00:33:56 ◼   ► ah one unusual angle it's like they [TS]

00:34:00 ◼   ► don't let you get neck tattoos in the [TS]

00:34:01 ◼   ► Navy because you're out of uniform [TS]

00:34:03 ◼   ► foo so that stuck with me until this day [TS]

00:34:07 ◼   ► and that is a distraction to spring [TS]

00:34:08 ◼   ► decor and that's exactly right and i [TS]

00:34:10 ◼   ► don't i don't like to be out of uniform [TS]

00:34:11 ◼   ► you know that about me no no you see it [TS]

00:34:13 ◼   ► seems to me that as eclectic as your [TS]

00:34:15 ◼   ► wardrobe is you you have an innate sense [TS]

00:34:18 ◼   ► of what the what the uniform of his [TS]

00:34:21 ◼   ► waist called military school uniform of [TS]

00:34:22 ◼   ► the day is precisely would announce that [TS]

00:34:25 ◼   ► everyday at our school is almost always [TS]

00:34:26 ◼   ► the same thing but you have to be ready [TS]

00:34:28 ◼   ► United put your blues on just yet so you [TS]

00:34:30 ◼   ► know when I wake up in the morning I [TS]

00:34:31 ◼   ► have the im a series of questions that I [TS]

00:34:34 ◼   ► ask right away as you do and but also I [TS]

00:34:38 ◼   ► I listen for the uniform of the day [TS]

00:34:39 ◼   ► announcement sometimes it says space [TS]

00:34:41 ◼   ► cowboy has your job gotten hotter than [TS]

00:34:46 ◼   ► fresh pumpkin chili tired of kissing the [TS]

00:34:48 ◼   ► wrong bird mired down by your managers [TS]

00:34:50 ◼   ► fear of even the slightest vision and [TS]

00:34:52 ◼   ► corporate discourse [TS]

00:34:53 ◼   ► well you're not alone a glue software [TS]

00:34:55 ◼   ► understands your pain a clue helps you [TS]

00:34:58 ◼   ► work better with other people by keeping [TS]

00:35:00 ◼   ► your team your files and your [TS]

00:35:01 ◼   ► conversations together in one digital [TS]

00:35:03 ◼   ► workplace [TS]

00:35:04 ◼   ► you can even work from home and you're [TS]

00:35:05 ◼   ► altogether sealed to your red leather [TS]

00:35:07 ◼   ► chair just steps away from all your [TS]

00:35:09 ◼   ► favorite globes candlesticks and cowboy [TS]

00:35:11 ◼   ► boots as you do so go to glue [TS]

00:35:13 ◼   ► software.com / find your duck and sign [TS]

00:35:16 ◼   ► up for your free 30-day trial bring your [TS]

00:35:18 ◼   ► team in from the cold by getting inside [TS]

00:35:20 ◼   ► the igloo in any case that sometimes it [TS]

00:35:24 ◼   ► says and you say you say yes sir i can [TS]

00:35:26 ◼   ► do that [TS]

00:35:27 ◼   ► yes sir sometimes it says preppy asshole [TS]

00:35:29 ◼   ► sometimes it says like you know coke [TS]

00:35:31 ◼   ► fiend [TS]

00:35:33 ◼   ► I never I never did much of anything on [TS]

00:35:35 ◼   ► a team and when I did things on a team I [TS]

00:35:36 ◼   ► didn't do it well but there are certain [TS]

00:35:38 ◼   ► things I picked up in military school [TS]

00:35:39 ◼   ► including the cold sore that I I'm [TS]

00:35:42 ◼   ► really glad I kept with me and I think [TS]

00:35:44 ◼   ► that I think about a lot and when [TS]

00:35:46 ◼   ► somebody says about face you know how to [TS]

00:35:47 ◼   ► about film and I can still do it always [TS]

00:35:49 ◼   ► talked about doing the rifle trails last [TS]

00:35:50 ◼   ► house on drill team so I mean I was I [TS]

00:35:52 ◼   ► was pretty good i was pretty good but uh [TS]

00:35:54 ◼   ► you know what I always liked have to [TS]

00:35:55 ◼   ► tell you I don't know this could find [TS]

00:35:57 ◼   ► any place in in your life but you know [TS]

00:35:58 ◼   ► you have the most of the time you're in [TS]

00:36:02 ◼   ► a pseudo official environment like [TS]

00:36:04 ◼   ► you're in uniform right and you know [TS]

00:36:07 ◼   ► there's no casualties the Great's [TS]

00:36:09 ◼   ► there's no no skylarking you know no [TS]

00:36:12 ◼   ► smoking this because all the rules that [TS]

00:36:13 ◼   ► are going to pass it and in being a [TS]

00:36:15 ◼   ► pseudo know [TS]

00:36:16 ◼   ► paramilitary teenager right but then [TS]

00:36:18 ◼   ► you're in like the official capacity [TS]

00:36:20 ◼   ► when you're not at ease right and if you [TS]

00:36:22 ◼   ► have a situation like turn your hat on [TS]

00:36:24 ◼   ► backwards shit now [TS]

00:36:25 ◼   ► oh my god no oh geez Louise your belt [TS]

00:36:28 ◼   ► buckle better be polishing your shoes [TS]

00:36:29 ◼   ► and don't use mop & Glo that's chishti [TS]

00:36:31 ◼   ► your don't get your I had better be [TS]

00:36:33 ◼   ► straight if you know what I'm saying if [TS]

00:36:34 ◼   ► you're if you're really in a hurry you [TS]

00:36:36 ◼   ► can use mop & Glo but it's gonna be [TS]

00:36:37 ◼   ► pretty obvious and you might get it to [TS]

00:36:38 ◼   ► merit that allows your pants mmm I don't [TS]

00:36:42 ◼   ► know what that means then I guess I want [TS]

00:36:44 ◼   ► to know what is what is busting your [TS]

00:36:45 ◼   ► pants allowing your pants is a thing [TS]

00:36:47 ◼   ► that we used to do him any military [TS]

00:36:50 ◼   ► which they don't do anymore which is [TS]

00:36:52 ◼   ► that your the bottoms the bottom hem of [TS]

00:36:54 ◼   ► your pants is like tucked into the top [TS]

00:36:57 ◼   ► of your boots I such a cool look and [TS]

00:36:59 ◼   ► then bloused out so that it's it's like [TS]

00:37:01 ◼   ► your boots are tight on your ankles and [TS]

00:37:03 ◼   ► their little tactical for what we were [TS]

00:37:04 ◼   ► doing but that said I would love that [TS]

00:37:06 ◼   ► look it's super cool it's a little bit [TS]

00:37:08 ◼   ► you know it's not something a little bit [TS]

00:37:10 ◼   ► yeah a little bit 1943 but like pretty [TS]

00:37:12 ◼   ► cool that was so our our fatigue uniform [TS]

00:37:16 ◼   ► even for PT at blast pans we weren't [TS]

00:37:21 ◼   ► kidding around in this in the Alaska [TS]

00:37:23 ◼   ► civil air patrol you don't have [TS]

00:37:24 ◼   ► something a little less formal that was [TS]

00:37:25 ◼   ► still uniform in those situations where [TS]

00:37:28 ◼   ► we have addressed by a dress blues [TS]

00:37:30 ◼   ► yeah we just lose one of my favorites [TS]

00:37:32 ◼   ► with salt and pepper which is when you [TS]

00:37:34 ◼   ► have a white shirt with epaulets with [TS]

00:37:35 ◼   ► the rank on it and black pants that was [TS]

00:37:37 ◼   ► a sharp look sharp we had for what they [TS]

00:37:40 ◼   ► called it that our everyday was cautious [TS]

00:37:43 ◼   ► this is coming back to me just a little [TS]

00:37:44 ◼   ► bit with khaki pants and a short sleeve [TS]

00:37:46 ◼   ► shirt trucks leave khaki shirt around [TS]

00:37:48 ◼   ► and then sometimes there's a term they [TS]

00:37:51 ◼   ► used like with lids or something and [TS]

00:37:53 ◼   ► there's some term for when you have to [TS]

00:37:55 ◼   ► wear your hat which kind of sucked and [TS]

00:37:57 ◼   ► then we had we had like turning over [TS]

00:37:59 ◼   ► there was a slightly more informal one [TS]

00:38:00 ◼   ► that was a little bit little bit even [TS]

00:38:01 ◼   ► guerre which I think was like a white [TS]

00:38:03 ◼   ► t-shirt with khakis it was a little bit [TS]

00:38:05 ◼   ► like you know tom's of Maine is that the [TS]

00:38:07 ◼   ► one times of feeling the feeling better [TS]

00:38:09 ◼   ► and that's where your want to taste the [TS]

00:38:10 ◼   ► other pics at tom's of maine was [TS]

00:38:12 ◼   ► toothpaste and Tom's finland makes a [TS]

00:38:13 ◼   ► sexy drawings [TS]

00:38:15 ◼   ► yeah and even our gym uniforms were [TS]

00:38:16 ◼   ► where we were highly no prescribed it [TS]

00:38:18 ◼   ► you ask for swabbing the deck right the [TS]

00:38:20 ◼   ► khakis with like you mean this is the [TS]

00:38:21 ◼   ► thing and I this is getting to this [TS]

00:38:23 ◼   ► deeper point which is that when we know [TS]

00:38:24 ◼   ► when we were just that you dress out for [TS]

00:38:26 ◼   ► for whatever it was whatever the name of [TS]

00:38:28 ◼   ► uniform was this [TS]

00:38:28 ◼   ► is 30 some years ago but you know you [TS]

00:38:31 ◼   ► wear these the admiral farragut academy [TS]

00:38:32 ◼   ► shorts and then you either wear the [TS]

00:38:35 ◼   ► white admiral farragut academy shirt or [TS]

00:38:37 ◼   ► more often you would wear the shirt for [TS]

00:38:39 ◼   ► your company and of course i was in 4th [TS]

00:38:40 ◼   ► company and had a purple shirt so it was [TS]

00:38:42 ◼   ► let me everybody showed up and you [TS]

00:38:44 ◼   ► didn't show up in a different shirt just [TS]

00:38:45 ◼   ► didn't do that you know and you [TS]

00:38:46 ◼   ► certainly don't show up with a hickey [TS]

00:38:48 ◼   ► well I got thrown out for for that kind [TS]

00:38:50 ◼   ► of stuff oh you get through yeah we [TS]

00:38:51 ◼   ► should've been thrown out of this [TS]

00:38:52 ◼   ► encampment Eielson Air Force Base but [TS]

00:38:54 ◼   ► they stuck around we secretly or and [TS]

00:38:56 ◼   ► secretly disappointed that I didn't get [TS]

00:38:58 ◼   ► a didn't get a blanket party didn't get [TS]

00:39:01 ◼   ► a absolutely right because you know Red [TS]

00:39:03 ◼   ► Code Red [TS]

00:39:04 ◼   ► yeah i mean a and in fact that was where [TS]

00:39:06 ◼   ► I learned how to short-sheet beds and I [TS]

00:39:09 ◼   ► think but this guy is frustrating for a [TS]

00:39:10 ◼   ► minute [TS]

00:39:11 ◼   ► it really is haha and i try to apply it [TS]

00:39:14 ◼   ► all the time but nobody makes them [TS]

00:39:15 ◼   ► better i'll never forget one day [TS]

00:39:16 ◼   ► Christian camp III got the skunk I was [TS]

00:39:19 ◼   ► so you ever have that your skunk [TS]

00:39:22 ◼   ► what's this company so humiliating at at [TS]

00:39:24 ◼   ► the breakfast they do all the [TS]

00:39:26 ◼   ► announcements and they announced like [TS]

00:39:27 ◼   ► his capitals this worse but I had the [TS]

00:39:29 ◼   ► worst bed in the whole campus the skunk [TS]

00:39:31 ◼   ► I'd never been so humiliated that gives [TS]

00:39:33 ◼   ► you by a man in my life it was awful i [TS]

00:39:36 ◼   ► learned Hospital corners I could bounce [TS]

00:39:38 ◼   ► a quarter off Thank You Man III could [TS]

00:39:40 ◼   ► the bed that I made when I was finally [TS]

00:39:42 ◼   ► in actual military school and moved on [TS]

00:39:44 ◼   ► from Christianity paramilitary gear i [TS]

00:39:46 ◼   ► made the fuck out of bed i have you [TS]

00:39:47 ◼   ► really got 1910 everyday mean Brian find [TS]

00:39:50 ◼   ► that I bet you could make a hell of a [TS]

00:39:51 ◼   ► bed i make a how about if I want to I [TS]

00:39:53 ◼   ► can talk that shit in quarters bounce [TS]

00:39:55 ◼   ► buddy about to pound off that shit my [TS]

00:39:57 ◼   ► most embarrassing moment was when i when [TS]

00:39:59 ◼   ► i was playing rugby for Gonzaga [TS]

00:40:02 ◼   ► University and I decided you were there [TS]

00:40:06 ◼   ► we were there for like two months how [TS]

00:40:08 ◼   ► long is it gonna take for two years [TS]

00:40:10 ◼   ► before you got for us to leave when I [TS]

00:40:12 ◼   ► was escorted off the campus mr. Roderick [TS]

00:40:15 ◼   ► is robbery that is series of meetings [TS]

00:40:17 ◼   ► and we just can't make this work [TS]

00:40:19 ◼   ► that's where i was escorted off the [TS]

00:40:20 ◼   ► campus for the last time i should i [TS]

00:40:23 ◼   ► should clarify because i was discord [TS]

00:40:24 ◼   ► about the caps a few times [TS]

00:40:26 ◼   ► but I was on the rugby team and I felt [TS]

00:40:28 ◼   ► somehow you know rugby shirts are very [TS]

00:40:30 ◼   ► expensive particularly the the realest [TS]

00:40:32 ◼   ► with the rubber buttons [TS]

00:40:33 ◼   ► yeah the pro ones are are are not cheap [TS]

00:40:35 ◼   ► and I had come to college with my own [TS]

00:40:38 ◼   ► selection of rugby shirts because it was [TS]

00:40:41 ◼   ► the eighties and rugby shirts were what [TS]

00:40:43 ◼   ► guys like me war and I Gonzaga scullers [TS]

00:40:48 ◼   ► were navy blue and white and i have high [TS]

00:40:52 ◼   ► had a I had a sky blue and pale yellow [TS]

00:40:57 ◼   ► rugby shirt [TS]

00:40:58 ◼   ► Oh John and I thought that's like being [TS]

00:41:01 ◼   ► off a quarter town [TS]

00:41:02 ◼   ► exactly just that that's like you're you [TS]

00:41:04 ◼   ► know it is thats ug g g string being [TS]

00:41:07 ◼   ► just a little bit flat that's what [TS]

00:41:09 ◼   ► that's exactly what it was and I showed [TS]

00:41:10 ◼   ► up I was wearing this thing up and you [TS]

00:41:14 ◼   ► know the older guys I was a freshman of [TS]

00:41:16 ◼   ► course the only guys did not approve but [TS]

00:41:19 ◼   ► I you know I was a big kid or whatever [TS]

00:41:22 ◼   ► and everybody just kinda looked askance [TS]

00:41:24 ◼   ► at it but but to my eternal shame i [TS]

00:41:27 ◼   ► showed up for our our group picture [TS]

00:41:31 ◼   ► wearing on this shirt and so here's this [TS]

00:41:35 ◼   ► that there's a picture still hanging in [TS]

00:41:37 ◼   ► the hallway of the main the main [TS]

00:41:41 ◼   ► building at Gonzaga University the best [TS]

00:41:43 ◼   ► the hall of fame or whatever there's a [TS]

00:41:45 ◼   ► picture of that 1987 Gonzaga rugby squad [TS]

00:41:49 ◼   ► and me in a in an off-color like light [TS]

00:41:54 ◼   ► yellow of all look of all the things if [TS]

00:41:57 ◼   ► it had been light blue a child wouldn't [TS]

00:41:59 ◼   ► that have been yearbook day and each of [TS]

00:42:01 ◼   ► you had had a separate photo in uniform [TS]

00:42:03 ◼   ► that would be merely horribly [TS]

00:42:04 ◼   ► embarrassing but you know he did you [TS]

00:42:05 ◼   ► fucked it up a for the rest of the team [TS]

00:42:08 ◼   ► and be for posterity now an old guy who [TS]

00:42:11 ◼   ► gave a gave a few thousand dollars in [TS]

00:42:12 ◼   ► school he walked down that hall and he [TS]

00:42:14 ◼   ► goes who the fuck was this guy in 1986 [TS]

00:42:16 ◼   ► exactly that's exactly what our ability [TS]

00:42:19 ◼   ► Corgan move I'll be dead a hundred years [TS]

00:42:21 ◼   ► and somebody walking through Gonzaga [TS]

00:42:23 ◼   ► University looking at the dusty [TS]

00:42:24 ◼   ► photographs and I'll go look at this [TS]

00:42:26 ◼   ► jackass [TS]

00:42:27 ◼   ► I think they should find the technology [TS]

00:42:28 ◼   ► to fix that with all due respect to you [TS]

00:42:30 ◼   ► you know what it's a it is it is an [TS]

00:42:32 ◼   ► accurate record of the moment it is an [TS]

00:42:34 ◼   ► accurate record of the time I was a [TS]

00:42:35 ◼   ► jackass and I just yeah and Trotsky was [TS]

00:42:37 ◼   ► never in any photos [TS]

00:42:39 ◼   ► I think a big part of super train should [TS]

00:42:42 ◼   ► be making things right I'm gonna [TS]

00:42:44 ◼   ► experience your triangle actively well [TS]

00:42:46 ◼   ► I'm just saying what retro actively this [TS]

00:42:48 ◼   ► is the beauty part i mean you know or [TS]

00:42:50 ◼   ► what was not riding in a vacuum the [TS]

00:42:51 ◼   ► beauty part about Stalin is that is that [TS]

00:42:54 ◼   ► he was so so able capable and willing to [TS]

00:42:57 ◼   ► change things over and over and over we [TS]

00:42:59 ◼   ► look need look no further than our [TS]

00:43:00 ◼   ► friend mouth he was always changing his [TS]

00:43:01 ◼   ► mind and then he changes mind everybody [TS]

00:43:03 ◼   ► changes their mind is like the captain [TS]

00:43:05 ◼   ► Wally when we accept late makes it [TS]

00:43:06 ◼   ► become breakfast time again same deal [TS]

00:43:08 ◼   ► while solid wood paint a guy out of the [TS]

00:43:10 ◼   ► picture and then three years later he'd [TS]

00:43:12 ◼   ► paint another guy on the picture and [TS]

00:43:14 ◼   ► pretty soon he painted all the guys out [TS]

00:43:15 ◼   ► of the picture and somebody had to draw [TS]

00:43:16 ◼   ► like a right like a horizon line and he [TS]

00:43:18 ◼   ► puts in like totoro or goofy or whoever [TS]

00:43:21 ◼   ► this is my tattoos happy little trees [TS]

00:43:24 ◼   ► isn't the problem [TS]

00:43:25 ◼   ► tattoos you know you got you got to live [TS]

00:43:27 ◼   ► with that forever you put Trotsky on [TS]

00:43:29 ◼   ► your ass and that's gonna be so you're [TS]

00:43:30 ◼   ► gonna be sitting on Leon like for the [TS]

00:43:31 ◼   ► rescue you know I'm saying I feel like [TS]

00:43:33 ◼   ► when we start talking about tattoos you [TS]

00:43:35 ◼   ► and I yeah you're alienating a great [TS]

00:43:37 ◼   ► number of our listeners who are right [TS]

00:43:39 ◼   ► now looking at their tattoos and feeling [TS]

00:43:41 ◼   ► very proud about the choices that they [TS]

00:43:42 ◼   ► make good for them [TS]

00:43:44 ◼   ► yeah and then I don't want to make the [TS]

00:43:45 ◼   ► particularly if they've got like my [TS]

00:43:47 ◼   ► little pony tattoo what they have a [TS]

00:43:49 ◼   ► tattoo of themselves dressed as a civil [TS]

00:43:52 ◼   ► war reenactor you know what else we're [TS]

00:43:53 ◼   ► doing but somebody who is about two days [TS]

00:43:56 ◼   ► away from getting a tattoo is gonna [TS]

00:43:58 ◼   ► think twice about it and that's what [TS]

00:43:59 ◼   ► we're saying interesting because if you [TS]

00:44:02 ◼   ► have I can make you feel bad about your [TS]

00:44:03 ◼   ► tattoo [TS]

00:44:04 ◼   ► I'm just saying that's why it should be [TS]

00:44:07 ◼   ► a t-shirt you wear that t-shirt for one [TS]

00:44:08 ◼   ► year you don't even take it off whatever [TS]

00:44:10 ◼   ► it is you want to put a bird on it put a [TS]

00:44:11 ◼   ► bird on t-shirt you wear it everyday i [TS]

00:44:13 ◼   ► got a wedding coming [TS]

00:44:13 ◼   ► no fuck you for your bird shirt we go [TS]

00:44:16 ◼   ► after year maybe get a tattoo you want [TS]

00:44:18 ◼   ► to change your friend who was a [TS]

00:44:21 ◼   ► redheaded girl [TS]

00:44:21 ◼   ► yeah this is the mulatto Irish uh yeah [TS]

00:44:25 ◼   ► yeah and after high school [TS]

00:44:27 ◼   ► this was the very dawn of people who [TS]

00:44:30 ◼   ► were not like active sailors getting [TS]

00:44:34 ◼   ► tattoos turn 1986 like it was not a [TS]

00:44:38 ◼   ► thing yet that's still pretty young [TS]

00:44:39 ◼   ► really early in me in the like I'm not [TS]

00:44:43 ◼   ► I'm not I'm not actually I don't even [TS]

00:44:46 ◼   ► think research books were widely read at [TS]

00:44:48 ◼   ► that point I'm not carving scrimshaw [TS]

00:44:51 ◼   ► I have a normal person I'm gonna get a [TS]

00:44:53 ◼   ► tattoo and she got a tattoo of a little [TS]

00:44:56 ◼   ► red-haired which riding a broom and she [TS]

00:45:00 ◼   ► got it in her bikini area and she was so [TS]

00:45:04 ◼   ► proud of this thing was a flying away [TS]

00:45:06 ◼   ► from her toward it was flying above it [TS]

00:45:10 ◼   ► was it was next to it and flying as [TS]

00:45:13 ◼   ► though to go over I'll cacao it was [TS]

00:45:16 ◼   ► gonna say was there was the with the [TS]

00:45:17 ◼   ► jumped over the bush foo and the little [TS]

00:45:21 ◼   ► red-haired which was I guess it was her [TS]

00:45:24 ◼   ► spirit animal she actually was a witch [TS]

00:45:26 ◼   ► and I don't mean a spell casting with [TS]

00:45:28 ◼   ► like a Lincoln know she was a witch like [TS]

00:45:30 ◼   ► a terrible girl ever and she got this [TS]

00:45:36 ◼   ► tattoo and she was so private shoes like [TS]

00:45:38 ◼   ► you know there it is for all the world [TS]

00:45:41 ◼   ► to see and I was like it's not for all [TS]

00:45:43 ◼   ► the world to see it's just for people [TS]

00:45:45 ◼   ► who get your panties off the sea and [TS]

00:45:47 ◼   ► presumably by the time someone has your [TS]

00:45:49 ◼   ► panties off they already know we'll put [TS]

00:45:52 ◼   ► a little which you are that's like socks [TS]

00:45:54 ◼   ► for Christmas Jones you know you see the [TS]

00:45:56 ◼   ► DC the box you open up minutes it's a [TS]

00:45:58 ◼   ► parable toes he goes shit i thought that [TS]

00:46:01 ◼   ► this is going to be star wars Jamie's [TS]

00:46:02 ◼   ► you know i'm saying i got a box with a [TS]

00:46:05 ◼   ► person goldtoes it right now be pretty [TS]

00:46:06 ◼   ► glad actually well you know I told this [TS]

00:46:09 ◼   ► house able to give Hodgman fresh pair of [TS]

00:46:10 ◼   ► socks i just i just got 16 paragould two [TS]

00:46:12 ◼   ► socks I never look back never look [TS]

00:46:13 ◼   ► that's nice you know that massive thing [TS]

00:46:15 ◼   ► that's the thing if you're if you are [TS]

00:46:17 ◼   ► able to give a friend a fresh pair of [TS]

00:46:18 ◼   ► socks and say you know what keep them [TS]

00:46:21 ◼   ► presence of mind bringing an extra socks [TS]

00:46:23 ◼   ► you're never going to not need more [TS]

00:46:24 ◼   ► socks [TS]

00:46:25 ◼   ► that's so nice yeah [TS]

00:46:27 ◼   ► Richard Richard Manuel from from the [TS]

00:46:32 ◼   ► band dad dead suicide of Florida yeah [TS]

00:46:35 ◼   ► the keyboard player from springs [TS]

00:46:38 ◼   ► keyboard player dead [TS]

00:46:39 ◼   ► that's right he did die yeah I'm just [TS]

00:46:41 ◼   ► I'm just saying if all the people in [TS]

00:46:42 ◼   ► bands it appears to be the keyboard [TS]

00:46:43 ◼   ► player to want to make a big deal about [TS]

00:46:45 ◼   ► it [TS]

00:46:45 ◼   ► I don't be sitting behind a desk and [TS]

00:46:47 ◼   ► there's no there's really nothing to do [TS]

00:46:48 ◼   ► but for do heroin because there's a lot [TS]

00:46:51 ◼   ► of times we just vamping your vamping [TS]

00:46:54 ◼   ► your plants will give you you know [TS]

00:46:55 ◼   ► presumably by the time the year the [TS]

00:46:57 ◼   ► keyboard player in a very successful [TS]

00:46:58 ◼   ► band before you're probably a great [TS]

00:47:00 ◼   ► pianist you could be sitting in the you [TS]

00:47:03 ◼   ► could be sitting at a grand piano at one [TS]

00:47:06 ◼   ► of the elevator lobbies of nordstrom [TS]

00:47:08 ◼   ► somewhere playing mantovani or whatever [TS]

00:47:11 ◼   ► it is they play at North services and [TS]

00:47:15 ◼   ► you're having dinner this weekend with a [TS]

00:47:17 ◼   ► nuestras this is and and yet you're back [TS]

00:47:20 ◼   ► there going dot dot dot dot done Anna [TS]

00:47:24 ◼   ► and maybe twice in the set one day [TS]

00:47:27 ◼   ► look we'll find you prices that the [TS]

00:47:29 ◼   ► singer turns around points of view and [TS]

00:47:30 ◼   ► you get to go but who you taking to [TS]

00:47:34 ◼   ► change the envelope and the filter who [TS]

00:47:36 ◼   ► we want or if your heart or the steve [TS]

00:47:41 ◼   ► miller band you get to like the mood for [TS]

00:47:43 ◼   ► a second ago 0 we get to turn up your [TS]

00:47:46 ◼   ► harp chord on the quiet part before the [TS]

00:47:48 ◼   ► last chorus but then the rest of the [TS]

00:47:50 ◼   ► time you're just sitting back there and [TS]

00:47:51 ◼   ► it's like I could do crossword puzzles [TS]

00:47:52 ◼   ► or I could do some help you think about [TS]

00:47:54 ◼   ► think about how much of it is you know [TS]

00:47:56 ◼   ► five things like triggering and [TS]

00:47:58 ◼   ► sequencers you know nowadays not saying [TS]

00:48:00 ◼   ► there's no role for these folks in it [TS]

00:48:01 ◼   ► but it's not like Howard Jones out there [TS]

00:48:03 ◼   ► you know with a little fucking [TS]

00:48:04 ◼   ► one-man-band simple between your knees [TS]

00:48:06 ◼   ► that set up a time that I don't know how [TS]

00:48:11 ◼   ► Jones man that hair anyway so um you [TS]

00:48:14 ◼   ► know he had yet here to call your you [TS]

00:48:17 ◼   ► know I'm his version of level terrorists [TS]

00:48:19 ◼   ► for apart so far little Terrace apart [TS]

00:48:22 ◼   ► because the version i heard before her [TS]

00:48:24 ◼   ► joy division's version isn't it odd how [TS]

00:48:25 ◼   ► you can do that take out [TS]

00:48:27 ◼   ► yeah i got a lot of things wrap up this [TS]

00:48:29 ◼   ► Canyon that doesn't happen anymore [TS]

00:48:30 ◼   ► course because people now have access to [TS]

00:48:33 ◼   ► all music from all-time instantly [TS]

00:48:35 ◼   ► yeah it's easier than ever to be over [TS]

00:48:37 ◼   ► something you know you can't be [TS]

00:48:39 ◼   ► move or something if you went down to [TS]

00:48:41 ◼   ► the opportunity and spent five dollars [TS]

00:48:42 ◼   ► in sixty-nine cents on it you're gonna [TS]

00:48:44 ◼   ► fucking listen to cheap Trick's [TS]

00:48:45 ◼   ► one-on-one to you love it period [TS]

00:48:47 ◼   ► we don't have to go over this again i [TS]

00:48:48 ◼   ► know i know but the thing is I'm there's [TS]

00:48:51 ◼   ► one thing i like that in military school [TS]

00:48:52 ◼   ► I didn't like it at the time but I'm [TS]

00:48:54 ◼   ► starting to understand the appeal if you [TS]

00:48:56 ◼   ► are in that official a kind of an [TS]

00:48:58 ◼   ► official formation if something happens [TS]

00:48:59 ◼   ► with showers [TS]

00:49:00 ◼   ► mmm nu nu oh gosh no oh boy group [TS]

00:49:05 ◼   ► showers it isn't having learned enough [TS]

00:49:07 ◼   ► from history John the charts don't go in [TS]

00:49:09 ◼   ► a room where they say everybody takes a [TS]

00:49:11 ◼   ► shower [TS]

00:49:11 ◼   ► can we just all agree that's a bad idea [TS]

00:49:12 ◼   ► you know and they're in mind in my [TS]

00:49:14 ◼   ► junior high my junior hide the coach [TS]

00:49:17 ◼   ► stood at the door where the shower [TS]

00:49:21 ◼   ► god that's wholesome with but with a [TS]

00:49:25 ◼   ► clipboard and he check your name off if [TS]

00:49:29 ◼   ► you if he saw you take a shower and if [TS]

00:49:33 ◼   ► you didn't [TS]

00:49:34 ◼   ► if he if you did not like go past him [TS]

00:49:36 ◼   ► standing at the door [TS]

00:49:39 ◼   ► take your towel off and take a shower [TS]

00:49:40 ◼   ► and so he could see that you had whetted [TS]

00:49:42 ◼   ► yourself from top to bottom if you [TS]

00:49:45 ◼   ► didn't do that it was impossible to get [TS]

00:49:46 ◼   ► me in gym so oo so hang on a minute [TS]

00:49:51 ◼   ► because you're saying something very [TS]

00:49:53 ◼   ► important here which is it's one thing [TS]

00:49:54 ◼   ► to say that you're going to get a like a [TS]

00:49:59 ◼   ► point off of your weekly whatever with [TS]

00:50:02 ◼   ► that but you're saying something quite [TS]

00:50:02 ◼   ► different [TS]

00:50:03 ◼   ► you're saying the biggest faggots in the [TS]

00:50:04 ◼   ► class which is the people who want [TS]

00:50:05 ◼   ► straight a's like me right [TS]

00:50:08 ◼   ► he's going to withhold your a right that [TS]

00:50:10 ◼   ► would give you the straight A's [TS]

00:50:12 ◼   ► that's right so you Poindexter better [TS]

00:50:15 ◼   ► get in there and get that little Angus [TS]

00:50:16 ◼   ► ears wet [TS]

00:50:17 ◼   ► that's right on that's John that is dark [TS]

00:50:20 ◼   ► as hell it was very it was super [TS]

00:50:21 ◼   ► psychological all of those do you think [TS]

00:50:23 ◼   ► he kept all those records [TS]

00:50:25 ◼   ► mm I don't know much about filing [TS]

00:50:28 ◼   ► cabinet somewhere at the basement of [TS]

00:50:30 ◼   ► wendler junior high school in Anchorage [TS]

00:50:32 ◼   ► that still has his handwritten notes of [TS]

00:50:34 ◼   ► whose daily Degas he saw i bet you mr. [TS]

00:50:38 ◼   ► fenell still has a lot of these broken [TS]

00:50:39 ◼   ► stars to god bless them but that you [TS]

00:50:42 ◼   ► know so that there's the there the kids [TS]

00:50:43 ◼   ► in seventh grade who have who are [TS]

00:50:45 ◼   ► already men [TS]

00:50:46 ◼   ► I'll it's the worst and then there are [TS]

00:50:48 ◼   ► the little skinny kids that have not [TS]

00:50:49 ◼   ► that are another still very much [TS]

00:50:51 ◼   ► always [TS]

00:50:52 ◼   ► right and and he standing there at the [TS]

00:50:54 ◼   ► doorway just like and he actually had a [TS]

00:50:58 ◼   ► little chance that he said he said he [TS]

00:51:01 ◼   ► said shower down begin a that's the [TS]

00:51:06 ◼   ► first chance I and her dad get a penny [TS]

00:51:10 ◼   ► and we're coming in for coming from the [TS]

00:51:12 ◼   ► playing fields whatever he's standing at [TS]

00:51:13 ◼   ► the door shower down to get an end it [TS]

00:51:14 ◼   ► doesn't even rhyme shower down to get a [TS]

00:51:16 ◼   ► it's it over and over starting to get an [TS]

00:51:20 ◼   ► a I I can't currently pull to mind a [TS]

00:51:22 ◼   ► better one but I mean that that's a [TS]

00:51:23 ◼   ► really miserable chant shower down to [TS]

00:51:26 ◼   ► get a shout-out to get in a that's [TS]

00:51:28 ◼   ► miserable [TS]

00:51:29 ◼   ► oh it was the turn of showers the [TS]

00:51:30 ◼   ► showers now here's what I like if you [TS]

00:51:32 ◼   ► were in this official this is not even [TS]

00:51:33 ◼   ► if you don't know I'm pursuing this but [TS]

00:51:36 ◼   ► if somebody came up to you an official [TS]

00:51:37 ◼   ► capacity if you were and let's say you [TS]

00:51:38 ◼   ► were in formation and you're standing at [TS]

00:51:40 ◼   ► attention during something like and you [TS]

00:51:42 ◼   ► know inspection and somebody is from [TS]

00:51:44 ◼   ► yeah yeah you should you know about this [TS]

00:51:46 ◼   ► is exactly three permissible answers to [TS]

00:51:50 ◼   ► any question yes sir no sir I don't know [TS]

00:51:52 ◼   ► sir [TS]

00:51:53 ◼   ► no bars was well that may be yours ours [TS]

00:51:55 ◼   ► was yes sir no sir no excuse sir [TS]

00:51:58 ◼   ► 00 no excuse sir not right now i believe [TS]

00:52:02 ◼   ► i did say no excuse so there are some [TS]

00:52:04 ◼   ► there are some of the things you learn [TS]

00:52:05 ◼   ► this like whether you like it or not the [TS]

00:52:06 ◼   ► whole point military school is not to [TS]

00:52:07 ◼   ► help you bloom is a special flower it is [TS]

00:52:09 ◼   ► to take you at the point when you are [TS]

00:52:11 ◼   ► most mother was most possible that you [TS]

00:52:13 ◼   ► could become an interesting person and [TS]

00:52:15 ◼   ► then try to make you uh a miserable brad [TS]

00:52:18 ◼   ► Ziegler [TS]

00:52:19 ◼   ► oh absolutely and then three in the [TS]

00:52:20 ◼   ► shower yeah what you think it's kinda [TS]

00:52:22 ◼   ► interesting you say to somebody why why [TS]

00:52:24 ◼   ► isn't your belt buckle shinier no excuse [TS]

00:52:28 ◼   ► sir you don't get sick as I was busy [TS]

00:52:29 ◼   ► watching buck rogers right you see no [TS]

00:52:32 ◼   ► excuse sir excuse sir it's a very [TS]

00:52:34 ◼   ► interesting idea to various state [TS]

00:52:35 ◼   ► because for somebody like me who is why [TS]

00:52:37 ◼   ► don't you notice this i'm a bit of a [TS]

00:52:38 ◼   ► talker because of my extensive liberal [TS]

00:52:41 ◼   ► arts background I got a reason for [TS]

00:52:42 ◼   ► everything that's right you would you [TS]

00:52:44 ◼   ► want to justify why your belt buckle is [TS]

00:52:46 ◼   ► not shiny go shower if you want in a [TS]

00:52:48 ◼   ► what is it [TS]

00:52:49 ◼   ► shower down to get a shower down to get [TS]

00:52:51 ◼   ► an eighth scans nicely but I shout out [TS]

00:52:54 ◼   ► to get an A and he had a little he had a [TS]

00:52:56 ◼   ► weird accent like weird like Oklahoma [TS]

00:52:58 ◼   ► accent shower down na na is miserable [TS]

00:53:01 ◼   ► shower down [TS]

00:53:02 ◼   ► right now there's there's literally in [TS]

00:53:04 ◼   ► the entire United States in our history [TS]

00:53:06 ◼   ► there's literally only one thing worse [TS]

00:53:07 ◼   ► than junior high and that's middle [TS]

00:53:08 ◼   ► school junior high is disgusting because [TS]

00:53:11 ◼   ► it's got got this problem on one level [TS]

00:53:13 ◼   ► of like a lucky say like some of the [TS]

00:53:16 ◼   ► people you know look like the retirees [TS]

00:53:18 ◼   ► and others look like toddlers [TS]

00:53:20 ◼   ► yeah but 6 7th and 8th grade I think [TS]

00:53:22 ◼   ► it's even worse because you got six [TS]

00:53:24 ◼   ► graders long in elementary school [TS]

00:53:27 ◼   ► nope i was i didn't have middle school I [TS]

00:53:29 ◼   ► had junior high but middle so I've heard [TS]

00:53:31 ◼   ► people when I learned about middle [TS]

00:53:32 ◼   ► school it gave me it gave me the shakes [TS]

00:53:34 ◼   ► so some of the girls in sixth grade look [TS]

00:53:36 ◼   ► like supermodels [TS]

00:53:37 ◼   ► yeah other ones look like they probably [TS]

00:53:39 ◼   ► needed to change their nappy right and [TS]

00:53:42 ◼   ► then but then you've got guys even in [TS]

00:53:44 ◼   ► seventh grade and these the really [TS]

00:53:46 ◼   ► stinky guys with with the weird [TS]

00:53:48 ◼   ► mustaches it didn't know how awkward [TS]

00:53:50 ◼   ► they were those poor bastards [TS]

00:53:52 ◼   ► I mean you get those guys and and you [TS]

00:53:55 ◼   ► grow really fast and you can done [TS]

00:53:56 ◼   ► coordinated year you know I don't you [TS]

00:53:58 ◼   ► want to have told you my plan now what's [TS]

00:54:00 ◼   ► your plan my plan is that the no one [TS]

00:54:03 ◼   ► learns anything in junior high [TS]

00:54:05 ◼   ► there is no they're not a single bit of [TS]

00:54:07 ◼   ► useful information is communicated or [TS]

00:54:09 ◼   ► retained 20-point information not [TS]

00:54:11 ◼   ► nothing nothing will be taught or or by [TS]

00:54:13 ◼   ► design nothing will be permitted to be [TS]

00:54:15 ◼   ► learned nothing enough it is impossible [TS]

00:54:17 ◼   ► to learn it is it is an unlearning [TS]

00:54:19 ◼   ► belittle unlearning in the bowl [TS]

00:54:22 ◼   ► environment [TS]

00:54:23 ◼   ► ok super super train junior high you [TS]

00:54:25 ◼   ► come in as an empty vessel and leave [TS]

00:54:26 ◼   ► potentially even more empty then you [TS]

00:54:28 ◼   ► came in so here's what happens here's [TS]

00:54:30 ◼   ► here's my plan for junior i'm sure i've [TS]

00:54:32 ◼   ► told you this at all from 7th 8th grade [TS]

00:54:35 ◼   ► all those kids are building trail in [TS]

00:54:38 ◼   ► national parks [TS]

00:54:39 ◼   ► [Music] [TS]

00:54:41 ◼   ► and this is a national program to get [TS]

00:54:44 ◼   ► sunscreen [TS]

00:54:45 ◼   ► well your betrayal so the have to get [TS]

00:54:49 ◼   ► fucking you get you get a hatter you're [TS]

00:54:51 ◼   ► under cover of trees I mean it's a bad [TS]

00:54:52 ◼   ► guess if you're building traveling [TS]

00:54:53 ◼   ► Arizona you do need sunscreen little [TS]

00:54:55 ◼   ► trip but uh but so we have a lot of [TS]

00:54:57 ◼   ► national parks a lot of those trails [TS]

00:54:58 ◼   ► need need a tremendous amount of upkeep [TS]

00:55:01 ◼   ► some of them were in treacherous [TS]

00:55:02 ◼   ► locations for older people to go up [TS]

00:55:05 ◼   ► there and haul logs and and fix that [TS]

00:55:08 ◼   ► trail that's a lot of that's a lot of [TS]

00:55:09 ◼   ► work for people young people [TS]

00:55:11 ◼   ► particularly seventh graders who are [TS]

00:55:14 ◼   ► incapable of learning anything and are [TS]

00:55:16 ◼   ► useful to society in every way except [TS]

00:55:19 ◼   ► except and folders there they're just [TS]

00:55:23 ◼   ► old enough that they could drag logs and [TS]

00:55:26 ◼   ► they can there that they should be [TS]

00:55:28 ◼   ► employed as donkeys that thread [TS]

00:55:31 ◼   ► throughout our national park system and [TS]

00:55:33 ◼   ► if if we used case this way so six [TS]

00:55:37 ◼   ► frayed you're learning stuff you're [TS]

00:55:39 ◼   ► still you're like engage your learning [TS]

00:55:40 ◼   ► about art and music you learn all the [TS]

00:55:43 ◼   ► bones in the body and how they connect [TS]

00:55:45 ◼   ► to one another and then you graduate [TS]

00:55:46 ◼   ► from sixth grade and you are immediately [TS]

00:55:49 ◼   ► sent to a Works Progress Administration [TS]

00:55:52 ◼   ► style camp on the side of Mount Rainier [TS]

00:55:55 ◼   ► or perhaps out in Death Valley [TS]

00:55:57 ◼   ► California wherever it is that travel [TS]

00:55:59 ◼   ► needs to be built that you are employed [TS]

00:56:02 ◼   ► in this capacity for two straight years [TS]

00:56:03 ◼   ► you come out the other side and here you [TS]

00:56:06 ◼   ► have clear skin you have a clear sense [TS]

00:56:09 ◼   ► of purpose your body is strong your your [TS]

00:56:13 ◼   ► youth has been employed in the service [TS]

00:56:14 ◼   ► of your great country and then you enter [TS]

00:56:17 ◼   ► ninth grade and again begin to learn [TS]

00:56:20 ◼   ► things from books at night at night [TS]

00:56:24 ◼   ► these kids will all sleep in these the [TS]

00:56:26 ◼   ► these depression-era bunk houses like [TS]

00:56:30 ◼   ► babies they'll sleep and they would they [TS]

00:56:32 ◼   ► will sleep like babies there will be [TS]

00:56:33 ◼   ► well they will read the read for a half [TS]

00:56:35 ◼   ► an hour by lantern light someone will [TS]

00:56:37 ◼   ► tell them a ghost story perhaps on [TS]

00:56:40 ◼   ► weekends and it will be contributing to [TS]

00:56:42 ◼   ► America in a way that that that there's [TS]

00:56:47 ◼   ► no substitute and they will be not not [TS]

00:56:48 ◼   ► contributing because that's part of the [TS]

00:56:50 ◼   ► problem i think that you're dressing [TS]

00:56:51 ◼   ► with this is [TS]

00:56:52 ◼   ► the utter lack of contribution the the [TS]

00:56:54 ◼   ► vacuum of contribution that we get from [TS]

00:56:56 ◼   ► these these fucking pubescent leeches [TS]

00:56:59 ◼   ► yeah these are terrible people that [TS]

00:57:00 ◼   ► people 7th 8th graders are terrible [TS]

00:57:02 ◼   ► people there they're the worst that [TS]

00:57:05 ◼   ► humanity has to offer and right now [TS]

00:57:06 ◼   ► we're plating them with like a so that [TS]

00:57:10 ◼   ► their dressing like those Bratz dolls [TS]

00:57:12 ◼   ► and they're listening to hip-hop music [TS]

00:57:14 ◼   ► and they are joining gangs or whatever [TS]

00:57:16 ◼   ► it is that young people do these days [TS]

00:57:17 ◼   ► after wearing white bar names they are [TS]

00:57:22 ◼   ► they are being lolitas for their [TS]

00:57:24 ◼   ► next-door neighbor's whatever Dylan key [TS]

00:57:26 ◼   ► Tars they are causing problems they're [TS]

00:57:29 ◼   ► causing problems for their families [TS]

00:57:31 ◼   ► they're causing problems for each other [TS]

00:57:32 ◼   ► they have they have terrible skin John [TS]

00:57:34 ◼   ► this is a comprehensive fuckin solution [TS]

00:57:36 ◼   ► because here's the other thing I'm sure [TS]

00:57:38 ◼   ► this is something you've already covered [TS]

00:57:39 ◼   ► in in in any of your plans for this but [TS]

00:57:42 ◼   ► but but what is the what is the primary [TS]

00:57:43 ◼   ► problem identifying hear about middle [TS]

00:57:45 ◼   ► school is the terrible felker beyond [TS]

00:57:48 ◼   ► bell curve really at liberty bell curve [TS]

00:57:50 ◼   ► of differences right you got some kids [TS]

00:57:52 ◼   ► to look at it like linebackers right [TS]

00:57:54 ◼   ► there like nine feet tall and they're [TS]

00:57:56 ◼   ► all they're all mean and glandular and [TS]

00:57:58 ◼   ► you got other kids over here within [TS]

00:57:59 ◼   ► bones [TS]

00:58:00 ◼   ► the thing is you there is work for [TS]

00:58:02 ◼   ► everybody when you're fucking building [TS]

00:58:03 ◼   ► trail right so right see somebody has [TS]

00:58:05 ◼   ► somebody's making the signs that say you [TS]

00:58:08 ◼   ► know that you're an artist you want to [TS]

00:58:09 ◼   ► be an artist make a fucking sign [TS]