Roderick on the Line

Ep. 21: "Dead Rubber Girl in My Closet"


00:00:00   hello hi John how are you hi Merlin [TS]

00:00:08   surely it is early it's too early for me [TS]

00:00:13   to sing our theme song for your theme [TS]

00:00:16   I'll and then you're 16 you see you and [TS]

00:00:21   bring I don't think that guy gets the [TS]

00:00:24   credit he deserves [TS]

00:00:25   I think it's more than enough credit by [TS]

00:00:27   think all she can more credit here [TS]

00:00:30   you're starting off today by by [TS]

00:00:32   stipulating that Coates gets all the [TS]

00:00:37   credit he deserves it all more more than [TS]

00:00:40   the credit your ears and Oates gets too [TS]

00:00:42   much credit but I i I'd probably put [TS]

00:00:46   them poorly because it's very very early [TS]

00:00:47   our listeners due to the asynchronous [TS]

00:00:52   time-shifting nature of media today will [TS]

00:00:54   probably be already be drunk and we'll [TS]

00:00:56   be late at night when you're listening [TS]

00:00:57   to this but for our purposes this is by [TS]

00:01:00   far the earliest we've ever tried to do [TS]

00:01:02   anything it's maybe the earliest i've [TS]

00:01:04   ever tried to do anything after sleeping [TS]

00:01:08   i have not slept [TS]

00:01:10   that's part of the problem no come on [TS]

00:01:12   well I didn't sleep i asked my lady [TS]

00:01:14   about this see I was worried about that [TS]

00:01:15   now I'm just saying that there may be [TS]

00:01:17   times that you have decided to for [TS]

00:01:20   whatever reason clean one of your [TS]

00:01:22   sidearms at three-thirty but I'm just [TS]

00:01:24   saying that's probably because you [TS]

00:01:26   haven't slept yet em right i can last [TS]

00:01:29   somebody was like something a tree down [TS]

00:01:31   in the next yard you probably don't like [TS]

00:01:32   normally wake up this early [TS]

00:01:35   no i don't and I'm certainly not [TS]

00:01:37   accustomed to considering oats [TS]

00:01:42   I'm sorry I you know my name like only [TS]

00:01:43   don't think that is saved for after [TS]

00:01:46   lunch [TS]

00:01:46   dads like a delicious mustachio dessert [TS]

00:01:50   it's an aperitif to sit and think about [TS]

00:01:53   what's this place in the rock pantheon [TS]

00:01:56   but i agree that Daryl Hall is one of [TS]

00:01:59   the great stylists I made fun of him for [TS]

00:02:02   a long time if there's two artists / [TS]

00:02:05   bands that I realize we're way better in [TS]

00:02:08   some ways than I thought and I don't [TS]

00:02:11   want to talk about journi but journeys [TS]

00:02:12   one of them and other one is way better [TS]

00:02:14   than I thought and then the other one is [TS]

00:02:16   absolutely daryl hall i had had no idea [TS]

00:02:18   if you last night manager crap you don't [TS]

00:02:20   appreciate what it terribly gifted man [TS]

00:02:23   daryl hall is absolutely true and you [TS]

00:02:25   know and I i think this is this speaks [TS]

00:02:27   to the value of the greatest hits [TS]

00:02:32   compilation it's a great greatest hits [TS]

00:02:34   I did not understand how good journey [TS]

00:02:36   was until I dug into journey's greatest [TS]

00:02:39   hits now obviously this was 20 years ago [TS]

00:02:41   that i discovered journey that's fine [TS]

00:02:43   you can stop right there that was more [TS]

00:02:45   than fine but up to give you stop that [TS]

00:02:48   separate ways [TS]

00:02:49   you were pretty good yeah maybe a little [TS]

00:02:51   before before that upper ways [TS]

00:02:53   yeah that's but I mean I'm talk about [TS]

00:02:54   greatest hits i'm not talking about hits [TS]

00:02:56   just know that was like the wings on the [TS]

00:02:58   cover I think it might have had a s [TS]

00:03:00   carolina is that a scarab had a scare [TS]

00:03:03   but maybe maybe the Scarab was a wasn't [TS]

00:03:05   a spaceship to there was leaving Earth [TS]

00:03:07   yeah there was something that was a [TS]

00:03:09   really flimsy like flimsy on the level [TS]

00:03:12   of like Zen arcade story I think to the [TS]

00:03:16   album covers like they're supposed to be [TS]

00:03:18   you know was discovery and escape and [TS]

00:03:21   monetization haha well it's like all the [TS]

00:03:25   Boston album covers where the city of [TS]

00:03:28   Boston as a pod is that what that is [TS]

00:03:30   yeah the city of Boston is a is enclosed [TS]

00:03:33   city in a glass pod okay and then it [TS]

00:03:36   blasts off through outer space and I [TS]

00:03:40   think in the final Boston cover it is [TS]

00:03:42   revealed that the city of Boston is [TS]

00:03:44   actually on a giant guitar displacing [TS]

00:03:46   the last it's a glass pod on a flying [TS]

00:03:49   space guitar and also explains why the [TS]

00:03:51   pot has so much compression on it [TS]

00:03:54   there's a lot of compression someone [TS]

00:03:56   likes your playthrough a rock man back [TS]

00:03:57   in the day of course everybody did had a [TS]

00:03:59   fake ID knockoff rockman I had like a [TS]

00:04:01   stock plan or something [TS]

00:04:03   the original Rahman was pretty pretty [TS]

00:04:05   cool for yes in around document [TS]

00:04:08   yeah that catalytic cannot plug adapter [TS]

00:04:11   Reagan the budget directly from Kansas [TS]

00:04:14   City electronics such as John Stockman [TS]

00:04:17   is that his name [TS]

00:04:18   no John's doctor that the guy that a [TS]

00:04:21   city where bro [TS]

00:04:22   the Utah Jazz this confused guy that ran [TS]

00:04:24   a civilization in Vietnam number and [TS]

00:04:27   marks here and we're running for vice [TS]

00:04:29   president with ross perot stockdale [TS]

00:04:32   stockdale right to set up the river he [TS]

00:04:35   went up the river he went up hard I mean [TS]

00:04:37   that guy it's a shame that that's our [TS]

00:04:38   memory of him because that guy he was [TS]

00:04:40   hard core you know you think he's a [TS]

00:04:43   crazy man but he's not a crazy man can [TS]

00:04:45   land a fraction and take a look at you [TS]

00:04:48   can't land i want to memorize that so [TS]

00:04:52   that any time I get bad customer service [TS]

00:04:53   i can go into dennis hopper's monologue [TS]

00:04:56   apocalypse now i think i've been trying [TS]

00:04:59   to memorize it for a long time but it is [TS]

00:05:00   so hopper is so stoned [TS]

00:05:04   damn it and it's so improvised that I [TS]

00:05:07   it's very hard to get inside his mind [TS]

00:05:09   like a unlike Michael Corleone's speech [TS]

00:05:14   in the italian restaurant before he [TS]

00:05:16   shoots [TS]

00:05:17   oh yes I was hopin you know when he was [TS]

00:05:19   what about this again when he says what [TS]

00:05:23   I want Carl doesn't guarantee no more [TS]

00:05:26   attempts on my father's life and then [TS]

00:05:29   you know it- on the next one with my [TS]

00:05:31   family sleeps and it looks like it when [TS]

00:05:33   my family sleeps where my children play [TS]

00:05:35   with their toys in my arms and that's [TS]

00:05:43   before he started yelling allied that's [TS]

00:05:45   not when oh man that's seen it and you [TS]

00:05:47   know what we have time for this because [TS]

00:05:48   we got to shorty today but if you ever [TS]

00:05:50   get a chance to see I only like a couple [TS]

00:05:52   things on blu-ray and one of them is the [TS]

00:05:54   godfather trilogy and watch two of them [TS]

00:05:55   and the documentary about the recent [TS]

00:05:58   restoration of that is amazing it's [TS]

00:05:59   amazing what you watch that scene now [TS]

00:06:01   and you can see he's got tix like his [TS]

00:06:03   face is quivering in that scene its you [TS]

00:06:06   would never see that in a shitty print [TS]

00:06:07   columbia was passing off in the eighties [TS]

00:06:08   yeah it's a mystery print what do you [TS]

00:06:11   see [TS]

00:06:11   no listen as somebody who cares about [TS]

00:06:12   this bullshit with music it's gonna blow [TS]

00:06:14   your mind what they did there was not an [TS]

00:06:16   extant usable negative of the Godfather [TS]

00:06:19   anymore so what what happened he does [TS]

00:06:22   get on your stations had to scan it [TS]

00:06:23   frame-by-frame at 4k like and good [TS]

00:06:26   looking for x 1080p and go through and [TS]

00:06:28   like hand like pixel by pixel go and fix [TS]

00:06:30   it to the original and not and not take [TS]

00:06:33   out the noise that's the key [TS]

00:06:35   this is always something like always in [TS]

00:06:37   certain losses on blu-ray well of course [TS]

00:06:39   it is dickhead [TS]

00:06:40   it's generally accepted that are [TS]

00:06:42   complaining about the blu-ray boys [TS]

00:06:44   fucking people [TS]

00:06:46   ok you go back let me go back a minute [TS]

00:06:47   there I just adjust that body long as [TS]

00:06:50   large televisions not for myself but for [TS]

00:06:52   the front of your child a close friend [TS]

00:06:54   yeah now that my mother of my child is [TS]

00:06:56   11 months old I figured it was time for [TS]

00:06:58   her to start to start time for me to [TS]

00:07:01   introduce her to the director's cut of [TS]

00:07:02   Blade Runner right and so I bought where [TS]

00:07:05   I didn't actually buy had a hand in that [TS]

00:07:07   you thought let's call the final cut of [TS]

00:07:09   Blade Runner was much better i was [TS]

00:07:11   present for the purchasing of a very [TS]

00:07:12   large television and i find it now very [TS]

00:07:15   distracting to see how ugly people are [TS]

00:07:18   now that they're blown up so much larger [TS]

00:07:21   hunting gun O'Brien and Cameron TS Wow [TS]

00:07:24   Cameron Cameron Diaz let's get popped [TS]

00:07:27   off course not a good way [TS]

00:07:29   yeah I have never I i never understood [TS]

00:07:30   Cameron Diaz I i remember when that [TS]

00:07:32   movie something about mary came out and [TS]

00:07:34   everybody was talking about always the [TS]

00:07:36   funniest movie huh [TS]

00:07:38   click the kmart Julia Roberts I when I I [TS]

00:07:41   didn't see it in theaters but as soon as [TS]

00:07:43   it was available on VHS tape a lady [TS]

00:07:46   friend of mine at the time and I rented [TS]

00:07:48   this movie and kinda we lay down lay [TS]

00:07:51   down in bed facing the you know with our [TS]

00:07:54   feet on the pillows like facing the [TS]

00:07:55   television like a Chin's propped up on [TS]

00:07:59   our hands [TS]

00:08:00   sweet image on a boy we're gonna watch [TS]

00:08:02   this really funny romantic comedy that [TS]

00:08:04   everybody likes so much and the movie [TS]

00:08:06   came on and I just felt like it was the [TS]

00:08:08   most it was it's so dead inside so [TS]

00:08:11   cynical and so unfunny and so so just [TS]

00:08:14   dead [TS]

00:08:15   yeah that the image that Cameron Diaz [TS]

00:08:18   portrayed of what was apparently every [TS]

00:08:20   guy in America's dream girl [TS]

00:08:22   it was just so so Ron where I admired [TS]

00:08:25   the first five minor anything that [TS]

00:08:27   involves jonathan richman but also i [TS]

00:08:29   admired the attempt to make a little [TS]

00:08:31   world like Amy that world was not [TS]

00:08:33   successful for you but I think the idea [TS]

00:08:35   of this overly ridiculously generous [TS]

00:08:37   woman and this guy who calls the retards [TS]

00:08:39   is is pretty funny I thought that was [TS]

00:08:41   funny [TS]

00:08:42   now they're very broad they're very [TS]

00:08:43   broad much those guys the other broad [TS]

00:08:45   abroad for me [TS]

00:08:47   they also made him carry popular which [TS]

00:08:48   has been [TS]

00:08:49   really hard on me you know the one movie [TS]

00:08:51   I ever walked out on was a nice mature [TS]

00:08:54   for first of all I've already started [TS]

00:08:56   lying because I walked out on multiple [TS]

00:08:57   movements a house you start making a [TS]

00:09:00   list were just guessing but but the the [TS]

00:09:02   movie that I remember walking out on a [TS]

00:09:04   rope walking out on where i actually [TS]

00:09:05   stood up at the at the front of the [TS]

00:09:07   theater and threw down my kid gloves in [TS]

00:09:10   disgust and made a point of walking out [TS]

00:09:12   made a point of stomping my feet as [TS]

00:09:14   eleven-and-a-half I went out not just in [TS]

00:09:17   a huff but I was like I was indignant [TS]

00:09:19   that everyone in the theater didn't get [TS]

00:09:21   up and follow me like I thought I i [TS]

00:09:23   thought this is a movie that I'm going [TS]

00:09:24   to stand up and I'm gonna say gentlemen [TS]

00:09:26   good as a i'm not going to stand here [TS]

00:09:31   and listen to you badmouth the United [TS]

00:09:34   States of America gentleman haha that's [TS]

00:09:38   a good movie i think we could all stand [TS]

00:09:40   up and march out to the to the feet from [TS]

00:09:42   the bridge over the River Kwai and you [TS]

00:09:44   and then nobody followed me everybody [TS]

00:09:46   else is like the chewing their cud like [TS]

00:09:48   a bunch of cows [TS]

00:09:49   that's why we lost the Cold War [TS]

00:09:50   attitudes like that it was it was Dick [TS]

00:09:53   Tracy who is broad Dick Tracy sorry [TS]

00:09:59   Madonna and then all the makeup there's [TS]

00:10:01   a lot of makeup [TS]

00:10:02   oh my god it was and here's the problem [TS]

00:10:04   here's the thing here's the thing about [TS]

00:10:06   Dick Tracy I made the terrible mistake [TS]

00:10:08   this is a long time ago I made a [TS]

00:10:10   terrible mistake of smoking a joint [TS]

00:10:12   smoking some marijuana before I want to [TS]

00:10:14   see this movie who which is usually good [TS]

00:10:17   usually it like it gets you into the [TS]

00:10:20   thing but it but the but the being [TS]

00:10:22   stoned took me completely out of the [TS]

00:10:25   movie i could not relate to get it done [TS]

00:10:27   k that acting yeah right exactly that's [TS]

00:10:29   exactly right [TS]

00:10:30   it's like watching sex dolls make a [TS]

00:10:32   movie yeah well i don't think i'd like [TS]

00:10:35   that at all especially they all looked a [TS]

00:10:36   little bit different and they looked a [TS]

00:10:38   little bit like people you knew but like [TS]

00:10:39   with bigger nose is super shiny it [TS]

00:10:41   depends on who the costars are on the [TS]

00:10:45   second text i'm starting to think about [TS]

00:10:47   sex i am too never seen a lot of dollars [TS]

00:10:49   ever seen this love doll have seen the [TS]

00:10:51   love dogs I've never seen one in person [TS]

00:10:52   intrigued by love dolls I don't know if [TS]

00:10:53   I want to be with one for a long time [TS]

00:10:55   but i'd like to just at least meet 1 i'm [TS]

00:10:58   afraid one day I'm going to go [TS]

00:10:59   somebody's gonna say like Oh [TS]

00:11:01   come over to my house I've got some [TS]

00:11:02   files for your whatever it is that Wow [TS]

00:11:04   however it is the people and i'm going [TS]

00:11:06   to open and close it and I'm gonna be at [TS]

00:11:08   their house and be like hey hang on just [TS]

00:11:10   a second I got to go in the back room [TS]

00:11:11   and get the files and I'm gonna be [TS]

00:11:13   walking around their living room like [TS]

00:11:14   open doors or whatever as you do and i [TS]

00:11:17   opened the closet door there's going to [TS]

00:11:18   be a love doll in there and I'm gonna [TS]

00:11:20   I'm gonna do not know you don't just [TS]

00:11:23   like you with a fake beard [TS]

00:11:25   I'm not gonna go whether to grab her and [TS]

00:11:27   run into the bathroom real quick and [TS]

00:11:28   have sex with her and then put her back [TS]

00:11:30   I i had so many things to ask you this [TS]

00:11:33   week John that I'm I'm very as I feel [TS]

00:11:35   like I shouldn't say this but I have so [TS]

00:11:37   many questions about sex dolls look at [TS]

00:11:40   the love doll in particular so I mean [TS]

00:11:43   I'm gonna let you pick I well [TS]

00:11:44   here--here's the thing that I have been [TS]

00:11:46   thinking about love dolls that's the [TS]

00:11:47   thing i recently discovered about love [TS]

00:11:49   dolls that that they have tried to [TS]

00:11:50   because people are gonna wonder why I [TS]

00:11:52   know so much we should explain what I [TS]

00:11:54   love doll is for the the want the people [TS]

00:11:56   who are gifted in lucky and fortunate [TS]

00:11:57   enough to not know what a lot of dollars [TS]

00:11:59   there have for years been usually as a [TS]

00:12:01   as a usually a sight gag in a movie [TS]

00:12:03   involving Steve Guttenberg mean by the [TS]

00:12:07   great comedy geniuses although his [TS]

00:12:09   performance in Coon was if you mention [TS]

00:12:11   that one more time i swear i got our [TS]

00:12:12   show is over [TS]

00:12:13   I what I would say to you is this i will [TS]

00:12:16   say to you just this is called a Segway [TS]

00:12:18   that the first movie I ever remember [TS]

00:12:20   walking out of was short circuit [TS]

00:12:22   oh man well considering it had a robot [TS]

00:12:25   and Ally Sheedy you i would ruin a [TS]

00:12:27   short-circuit the robot [TS]

00:12:29   yeah you know he become so human I'm not [TS]

00:12:31   gonna sit and listen to people talk [TS]

00:12:32   about America like that of so for years [TS]

00:12:34   there have been these jokey things that [TS]

00:12:37   like you let us step in sex shop is not [TS]

00:12:39   real over sex [TS]

00:12:40   well yeah and there they look at the [TS]

00:12:42   like a beach ball with holes and it's it [TS]

00:12:44   barely looks like anything the men's [TS]

00:12:46   super creepy the women was super creepy [TS]

00:12:48   but the idea was it has this thing that [TS]

00:12:51   you could put your wiener in and have [TS]

00:12:53   like a mouth big scary why mouth [TS]

00:12:55   ok so first couple of places you can put [TS]

00:12:57   your winner they have anything there was [TS]

00:12:59   her back to her there was the other area [TS]

00:13:00   down there [TS]

00:13:02   yeah and it had a little like a shock of [TS]

00:13:04   a weird-looking you probably animal hair [TS]

00:13:07   with a little lady here would be there [TS]

00:13:09   was a beach ball with some of the shock [TS]

00:13:11   of vegetable that penetrable and hirsute [TS]

00:13:13   beach ball [TS]

00:13:14   right especially the old days that's the [TS]

00:13:17   only day is yeah so loneliness to point [TS]

00:13:19   out came along in the late nineties and [TS]

00:13:21   I first remember this because it was a [TS]

00:13:23   really pretty website that that we just [TS]

00:13:26   couldn't stop looking at called love [TS]

00:13:28   that was actually called love comments [TS]

00:13:29   still around and you just went there [TS]

00:13:30   because the website was pretty you just [TS]

00:13:32   wanted to see you want to see the HTML [TS]

00:13:34   well like John I have a lot of really [TS]

00:13:37   weird sex things i like but like the [TS]

00:13:39   love doll does not ring a lot of those [TS]

00:13:40   belts out where my three-by-five cards i [TS]

00:13:42   need to start writing this down like I'm [TS]

00:13:44   talk about this here the line look love [TS]

00:13:46   dolls are on 2nite oh no well no that's [TS]

00:13:49   the thing it's like I would admit to you [TS]

00:13:51   if there was one of them [TS]

00:13:52   I'm comfortable talking about this [TS]

00:13:53   intellectually not good as you're not [TS]

00:13:55   turned on but you know there's a [TS]

00:13:57   documentary about this right [TS]

00:13:58   I didn't know oh yeah i guess it was [TS]

00:14:00   actually do people have i would say i [TS]

00:14:03   don't know if there's an opposite of sex [TS]

00:14:04   against the opposite of sexy st party [TS]

00:14:06   but i have not looked like the type [TS]

00:14:08   right now I'm not gonna do that anymore [TS]

00:14:10   the notion is that the love doll from [TS]

00:14:12   the get-go day 0 they wanted to make the [TS]

00:14:15   most frightening Lee lifelike right doll [TS]

00:14:19   his ex it actually has an inner sort of [TS]

00:14:21   skeleton Skeletor did kind of like you [TS]

00:14:25   can bend and mold the liquor everything [TS]

00:14:27   the skin gives like human skin would [TS]

00:14:30   give them the finger at knifepoint the [TS]

00:14:37   landlady holes are extremely detailed [TS]

00:14:40   it's like something NASA if NASA had to [TS]

00:14:42   make it nasa had to make a rectum this [TS]

00:14:44   they would make this is a NASA style [TS]

00:14:47   rectum and AJ I think that there are [TS]

00:14:49   people who listen to this podcast who [TS]

00:14:51   work for NASA my life I got to be [TS]

00:14:53   content i ride ticket and holy shit [TS]

00:14:56   homie day i'm sorry i'll cut that out is [TS]

00:14:58   he doesn't he doesn't listen to this [TS]

00:15:00   podcast is I know by now [TS]

00:15:02   well the elbow it's embarrassing to hear [TS]

00:15:04   something I kind of arms now I'm [TS]

00:15:06   starting to think about a NASA made [TS]

00:15:08   rectum [TS]

00:15:09   well think about this velcro there are [TS]

00:15:10   probably a lot of people said don't [TS]

00:15:11   bother right like tang they probably [TS]

00:15:14   said you burn cycles on this and now [TS]

00:15:16   today we have a better lifestyle because [TS]

00:15:17   tags no longer popular but we still have [TS]

00:15:19   velcro backing a long time the other [TS]

00:15:21   thing now if I know what's interesting [TS]

00:15:23   kind [TS]

00:15:24   dad fucking damnit i don't even know [TS]

00:15:25   where to start with this time let's and [TS]

00:15:27   let's get through the big parts the skin [TS]

00:15:29   feels and again we all know what the [TS]

00:15:32   uncanny valley is which is essentially [TS]

00:15:33   things have you seen one another but [TS]

00:15:35   everybody says the same thing there [TS]

00:15:37   currently are so creepy really they're [TS]

00:15:39   not real [TS]

00:15:39   I can you know there's an FAQ has a [TS]

00:15:41   thing on how to make her skin warm it's [TS]

00:15:43   totally creepy [TS]

00:15:45   internet giant microwave or something [TS]

00:15:46   because gotta love microwave it's very [TS]

00:15:48   large and address is right is the loved [TS]

00:15:51   it loved all uncanny valley problem [TS]

00:15:53   k which is that they have addressed now [TS]

00:15:56   loved all the love doll people loved a [TS]

00:15:58   link has addressed the uncanny valley [TS]

00:16:00   like it there by making a new version of [TS]

00:16:06   love dolls wield all fuck real doll for [TS]

00:16:08   real dollars i really like i do that [TS]

00:16:10   version of real dollars God which are [TS]

00:16:12   less realistic and more cartoony exactly [TS]

00:16:17   what I was gonna say oh yeah good luck [TS]

00:16:18   getting along the ones now right you can [TS]

00:16:20   get crazy ones that look like manga [TS]

00:16:22   cartoons [TS]

00:16:23   ok let's play like cosplay looking and [TS]

00:16:25   people are super psyched about these and [TS]

00:16:27   it has addressed the problem of like I [TS]

00:16:29   have a dead rubber girl in my club now [TS]

00:16:33   Jonathan rubber girl you have a you have [TS]

00:16:36   a fetish item you have a cartoon like a [TS]

00:16:40   cartoon rabbit like its it appeals to [TS]

00:16:42   people who are like first since I was a [TS]

00:16:45   friends who are furries they're not [TS]

00:16:47   having sex with a rubber rabbit girl [TS]

00:16:49   that's not weird at a dead girl looking [TS]

00:16:51   guys [TS]

00:16:52   oh my god the guys have all look like [TS]

00:16:53   god John wait [TS]

00:16:56   well here's the thing from the dummies [TS]

00:16:57   think about guys is the guys are ugly [TS]

00:17:00   even realize Iran [TS]

00:17:02   Oh criminy John don't have enough you're [TS]

00:17:05   looking at this one looks at one looks a [TS]

00:17:08   lot like post plastic surgery Bruce [TS]

00:17:09   Jenner uh not get on with what I mean [TS]

00:17:13   right now is vintage Porsches ok i just [TS]

00:17:16   have a bunch of vintage portions up on [TS]

00:17:17   my boy gallery that's when you want to [TS]

00:17:19   look at [TS]

00:17:19   ok so let's get this get past this right [TS]

00:17:21   according to I guess according to what i [TS]

00:17:23   have read these these dolls which are [TS]

00:17:26   made for you to put your penis in and do [TS]

00:17:27   other things with you can dress them up [TS]

00:17:28   in doing this on them you don't have to [TS]

00:17:30   put it in and do whatever you want it's [TS]

00:17:32   yours now you bought it right exactly [TS]

00:17:34   it comes in this well speaking arrives [TS]

00:17:36   in this big box [TS]

00:17:37   and it'sit's very well cared for you [TS]

00:17:39   gotta see we gotta look up this this [TS]

00:17:40   documentary I forget what it's called [TS]

00:17:42   I'm sorry got the name offer for [TS]

00:17:43   everybody who works at real-time sorry [TS]

00:17:45   no disrespect to work if anybody is [TS]

00:17:47   listening to this podcast works a real [TS]

00:17:48   doll and you want to send trial Real [TS]

00:17:50   Dolls I'm to John and send some money [TS]

00:17:53   masters she was like at what you like [TS]

00:17:55   that you know John I don't like a [TS]

00:17:56   ping-pong here but you got a lot of [TS]

00:17:58   options here i'm sure you can get you [TS]

00:18:00   get asian people get you could get like [TS]

00:18:02   a you get relegated an african-american [TS]

00:18:05   lady with blonde hair and like kinda [TS]

00:18:08   like chinese lady eyes [TS]

00:18:09   well here's the here's the thing here's [TS]

00:18:10   the thing this is the problem I like [TS]

00:18:12   girls who have a good kind of have a big [TS]

00:18:15   know the Jewish you want to just like I [TS]

00:18:16   liked I like garlic Judy girls who and [TS]

00:18:19   that is a thing that they uh that no no [TS]

00:18:24   one in the fantasy girl manufacturing [TS]

00:18:27   business two main issues from this week [TS]

00:18:32   thinks that that is a UH think that that [TS]

00:18:35   is an advantage right they're all trying [TS]

00:18:37   to put look perky little noses on girls [TS]

00:18:40   this and and they don't they don't [TS]

00:18:42   feeling you want you want you want [TS]

00:18:43   tapping against you want to feel punk [TS]

00:18:45   punk punk you want hitting your lower [TS]

00:18:47   abdomen my write-up model top of the [TS]

00:18:52   fantasy girl manufacturing with industry [TS]

00:18:54   or business with an industry industry [TS]

00:18:55   industry i'm making some industry [TS]

00:18:57   because that's terrible that's a Shonda [TS]

00:18:59   you should let them know that they could [TS]

00:19:01   make a lot more do I look at this new [TS]

00:19:03   route linking the cyber little signal [TS]

00:19:05   over here in the middle east yes be [TS]

00:19:07   buying real dolls if they just had ones [TS]

00:19:09   that had a little bit of more of a [TS]

00:19:11   because I considered a law i think it is [TS]

00:19:13   considered a law because no no no [TS]

00:19:16   animals were killed to make a rule so [TS]

00:19:18   the rabbi was there when they put the [TS]

00:19:19   ladies JJ on that could conceivably get [TS]

00:19:21   the K on and maybe get a to maybe get a [TS]

00:19:24   Jewish has big gain a circle I'm not a [TS]

00:19:26   circle k place but you know what I'm [TS]

00:19:27   saying [TS]

00:19:27   well I'm sure there's someone there [TS]

00:19:29   someone in dubai there's some like I'm [TS]

00:19:33   not remain me there's some guy in [TS]

00:19:35   tomorrow some some mom in dubai who has [TS]

00:19:38   issued a fatwa on an effect was not [TS]

00:19:41   always negative doesn't shoot a proper [TS]

00:19:43   positive flaw like it's like a [TS]

00:19:45   suggestion box nice job that's like I [TS]

00:19:47   think that this passes i think the [TS]

00:19:49   Prophet Muhammad would have [TS]

00:19:50   root of this this dead girl photo so i [TS]

00:19:59   don't like it i guess i have to imagine [TS]

00:20:02   there are precious few men who are [TS]

00:20:05   anywhere between browsing you know just [TS]

00:20:08   kind of browsing casually to collecting [TS]

00:20:11   these whoever besma rubber girl that'd [TS]

00:20:16   be a pretty song [TS]

00:20:17   well this is dead rubber girl yeah it's [TS]

00:20:19   a dead milkmen nothing i'm at a girl and [TS]

00:20:23   she was shiny on her skin is there is a [TS]

00:20:26   hygiene if you're listening you know [TS]

00:20:27   that you know that somebody from from [TS]

00:20:29   from the banned list or show i'm very [TS]

00:20:31   excited because that's a band i really [TS]

00:20:33   like a lot [TS]

00:20:33   well i know i do too and I did not [TS]

00:20:35   realize that oh no this is the kind of [TS]

00:20:36   thing i'm facing now is realizing the [TS]

00:20:37   people we know listen to the show and [TS]

00:20:39   freaks me out and it's just super nice [TS]

00:20:42   you have got to fix that bug her people [TS]

00:20:43   bug here's the thing right now one less [TS]

00:20:45   day I'm saying that in the entire side [TS]

00:20:46   well there's not one link in the side [TS]

00:20:48   rail I don't want to click I don't click [TS]

00:20:50   on female realdoll female to male real [TS]

00:20:52   doll doll closet i'm so not clicking on [TS]

00:20:54   that was exactly what was that be great [TS]

00:20:56   name for a bar we had real dolls [TS]

00:20:58   you know i mean you can meet us there [TS]

00:20:59   anything that's right there money at [TS]

00:21:01   some other point that it was big money [TS]

00:21:04   to pretend the defense but here's the [TS]

00:21:07   thing here's the thing about a real doll [TS]

00:21:09   locations was the last one time I want [TS]

00:21:11   i'm a friend of mine was like he needed [TS]

00:21:14   to help a friend move his something or [TS]

00:21:16   couch or something and he was like hey [TS]

00:21:18   will you come help me help me move this [TS]

00:21:19   couch for this guy and I said yeah of [TS]

00:21:21   course and we got in his car we drove [TS]

00:21:23   over to this neighborhood that I never [TS]

00:21:24   went to and here's this guy super nice [TS]

00:21:27   guy [TS]

00:21:27   we're hanging out and we're gonna move [TS]

00:21:31   his couch for him and it too and then it [TS]

00:21:32   turns out he has a cockatiel right he [TS]

00:21:35   has a big white cockatoo like burning at [TS]

00:21:37   redbird yeah and so I'm fascinated by [TS]

00:21:40   this Bernie brings the burden i'm like [TS]

00:21:41   oh my god this bird is so amazing in the [TS]

00:21:44   bird gets on my finger and I'm i feel [TS]

00:21:47   like i'm really getting to know the bird [TS]

00:21:49   and the bird is getting to know me we're [TS]

00:21:50   really it's a smart bird were [TS]

00:21:52   interacting with each other [TS]

00:21:54   we're having a moment right and the guy [TS]

00:21:56   is remarking on it like wow he doesn't [TS]

00:21:59   usually like other people and this bird [TS]

00:22:00   is it my bird is really like [TS]

00:22:03   he digs you man like yeah your birthday [TS]

00:22:06   to me and I take your bird and we're [TS]

00:22:09   kind of where we're looking at each [TS]

00:22:10   other we're looking at each other's eyes [TS]

00:22:12   and that and the bird leans down and [TS]

00:22:16   kinda like gently grabs onto my lip with [TS]

00:22:21   his with his beak but he's being very [TS]

00:22:24   gentle and I'm like this is this is nice [TS]

00:22:27   he's he's giving me a kid at first I was [TS]

00:22:30   scared for now it's kind of let lift and [TS]

00:22:32   then the bird slips me the tone on man [TS]

00:22:36   bird puts his talk confidently well yeah [TS]

00:22:40   like a kiss and I went haha wow weird [TS]

00:22:45   and the guy the bird owner gets all bent [TS]

00:22:49   out of shape and he's like hey man why [TS]

00:22:52   you kissing my bird [TS]

00:22:53   y-you french kissing my bird dude and [TS]

00:22:57   he's pissed off and I'm like I didn't [TS]

00:23:00   French kiss your bird your face me I'll [TS]

00:23:03   just please understand i was young i was [TS]

00:23:06   holding them on my finger and looking [TS]

00:23:07   him in the eye and he pitches out he's [TS]

00:23:09   like he gives me a little blue tongue in [TS]

00:23:11   the mouth and the guys like give me my [TS]

00:23:13   bird back and it gets the bird is like [TS]

00:23:15   you know why don't you guys get out of [TS]

00:23:17   here like I don't even want you to move [TS]

00:23:18   my couch and he literally kicks us out [TS]

00:23:22   of his place we didn't do it we didn't [TS]

00:23:24   do the favor that we came to do and as [TS]

00:23:27   we drive off he's standing there on the [TS]

00:23:28   street like like kissing his bird and [TS]

00:23:32   all all hacked off of me because I was [TS]

00:23:35   like ghosts a copy to feel or whatever [TS]

00:23:37   and i was i was both offended and a [TS]

00:23:41   little disgusted when i realized that i [TS]

00:23:42   probably had salmonella at this point [TS]

00:23:44   but I feel like the problem with a real [TS]

00:23:47   doll is the same thing you if you [TS]

00:23:49   because these things are not inexpensive [TS]

00:23:51   know but I'm gonna get the sense that [TS]

00:23:53   there's a lot of craftsmanship and so [TS]

00:23:55   you buy one of these things you dress it [TS]

00:23:57   up you interact with you spend a lot of [TS]

00:23:58   time with it and then some guys come [TS]

00:24:00   over to move your couch and you're like [TS]

00:24:01   I want you to meet somebody like you [TS]

00:24:04   could you almost couldn't help you gotta [TS]

00:24:06   watch this you gotta watch this movie [TS]

00:24:07   its kind of actually it's sweet in its [TS]

00:24:10   way that it's there there's these a lot [TS]

00:24:12   of these guys sure there's like that [TS]

00:24:13   definitely somewhat sexual component to [TS]

00:24:15   it there forever alone [TS]

00:24:16   these guys that determines that a hyphen [TS]

00:24:18   it forever alone who afraid that that is [TS]

00:24:21   an internet meme ok but the young people [TS]

00:24:24   that from for chance I'll see I'm not [TS]

00:24:26   supposed to talk about it okay [TS]

00:24:28   I appreciate that trying to figure this [TS]

00:24:29   out cause I may have something here that [TS]

00:24:31   merits some funding and possibly some [TS]

00:24:34   kind of a series let's see okay sorry [TS]

00:24:36   Sam but in this case I just want you to [TS]

00:24:38   know they're made down by LA so if you [TS]

00:24:40   look around we could go to the factory [TS]

00:24:41   you can get a factor to her just one [TS]

00:24:43   should do that it's just I I'm trying to [TS]

00:24:45   all I'm trying to in advance figure out [TS]

00:24:47   what the etiquette is if somebody [TS]

00:24:48   introduces you to there right there dead [TS]

00:24:51   rubber girl do you put your tongue in [TS]

00:24:54   her mouth [TS]

00:24:55   I no not you know what else has been in [TS]

00:24:57   her mouth [TS]

00:24:58   I mean what did you put her hair do you [TS]

00:25:00   how do you interact that's a real it's a [TS]

00:25:02   really good question but i think i think [TS]

00:25:03   the first watch want to be clear that i [TS]

00:25:05   can I do apologize to the people of real [TS]

00:25:06   doll trade marketing was the same time [TS]

00:25:08   Marcus one of those fake cities in [TS]

00:25:10   California San Marcos unreal [TS]

00:25:13   scent-marking that's obviously made-up [TS]

00:25:15   they said they are the industry leader [TS]

00:25:16   since 1996 of the industry leader [TS]

00:25:19   yeah well that's that's that's a big [TS]

00:25:21   vertical space i guess it [TS]

00:25:23   they're just they're just talking all [TS]

00:25:25   the other dead rubber girl manufacturing [TS]

00:25:27   oh yeah because 3s yeah yeah exactly [TS]

00:25:29   faked all [TS]

00:25:30   yeah uh haha where the mcdonalds fuck [TS]

00:25:35   dolls now listen I have a feeling there [TS]

00:25:37   are places that are priced flora that we [TS]

00:25:38   could go to where we could get a lot of [TS]

00:25:40   extremely specific tests but here's what [TS]

00:25:42   I'm gonna say I'm gonna say it's gonna [TS]

00:25:44   be like a combination of being [TS]

00:25:45   introduced to somebody's younger than [TS]

00:25:49   she should be girlfriend not underage [TS]

00:25:51   but you know like old guy with lady in [TS]

00:25:53   her twenties kind of thing like meeting [TS]

00:25:54   her like to be that guy wonder you know [TS]

00:25:57   combined with a siamese cat and maybe a [TS]

00:26:00   nice car like I think all of the things [TS]

00:26:01   that you would observe [TS]

00:26:03   ok so in other words don't say she has [TS]

00:26:04   nice tits don't put your hands in her [TS]

00:26:06   mouth and don't start rubbing the [TS]

00:26:07   upholstery I think that's the kind of [TS]

00:26:09   thing somebody would respect you come in [TS]

00:26:10   you treat you treat my real dollars [TS]

00:26:12   respect just like you treat me and I [TS]

00:26:14   think the problem is that birth at Birth [TS]

00:26:16   sounds I I don't know a lot of guys you [TS]

00:26:17   know i'm not an alien sex expert John [TS]

00:26:19   but i think that that bird might have [TS]

00:26:21   been a little bit bird promiscuous or at [TS]

00:26:22   least let these human curious [TS]

00:26:24   I you know after all after I was a few [TS]

00:26:27   miles down the road I thought maybe the [TS]

00:26:28   bird was maybe that was a crime [TS]

00:26:30   for help maybe the person get me out of [TS]

00:26:31   here i'm imagining one of those [TS]

00:26:33   sequences were like suddenly because you [TS]

00:26:35   can get the bird out of your mind a [TS]

00:26:37   little bit of tongue is very slowly stop [TS]

00:26:40   stop you're still tasty bird seed [TS]

00:26:42   cockatiel okok 237 bird this was the [TS]

00:26:47   birth back anything they've been [TS]

00:26:48   together [TS]

00:26:49   yeah sure but I did I didn't do it [TS]

00:26:52   cytokines are fried and even know what [TS]

00:26:54   gender the bird was taken with that [TS]

00:26:56   could have been a totally gay experience [TS]

00:26:58   that I had with that bird it depends the [TS]

00:26:59   idea said beyond it being a french [TS]

00:27:03   kissing I think stipulated that if you [TS]

00:27:04   fuck something dead that the same gender [TS]

00:27:06   as you are it's not a gay thing [TS]

00:27:08   now what about what about an animal that [TS]

00:27:11   we talk i mean we got into this a little [TS]

00:27:12   bit right okay and what's this weekend [TS]

00:27:14   remember those guys that were down here [TS]

00:27:15   in woodinville that we're going out in [TS]

00:27:17   the middle of the night and having sex [TS]

00:27:18   with horses and then one guy got he died [TS]

00:27:22   can essentially well I i can't say how [TS]

00:27:25   much a horse can consent to having sex [TS]

00:27:28   with a guy with the taps twice and Cara [TS]

00:27:33   that hurts [TS]

00:27:34   hey one of the guys guys guys just not [TS]

00:27:36   you like carrots the horse was the horse [TS]

00:27:38   was having sex with him and Andy he [TS]

00:27:41   broke something on his inside on the [TS]

00:27:44   horses in science on the man's insides [TS]

00:27:46   of the horse he was the man in in this [TS]

00:27:50   scenario the horse he was the man [TS]

00:27:52   character they call that whore stopping [TS]

00:27:55   and the human man was the lady character [TS]

00:27:57   and and it broke something him and he [TS]

00:28:00   said I think that they were videotaping [TS]

00:28:02   it because that's what you do you don't [TS]

00:28:04   want to be having you don't want to let [TS]

00:28:05   this moment go undocumented and the guy [TS]

00:28:08   said Oh something just is wrong now and [TS]

00:28:12   they raised him to the hospital paint [TS]

00:28:13   horses have three large penises [TS]

00:28:15   I believe that's true i have i have its [TS]

00:28:19   there's not even a word close accidental [TS]

00:28:21   animals they sure are i think i think [TS]

00:28:23   this generally proportional thing [TS]

00:28:25   you know what I'm going to say this all [TS]

00:28:27   I'm gonna say is I you know I think if [TS]

00:28:29   you make yourself a lady horse I think I [TS]

00:28:32   don't say you get what you have coming [TS]

00:28:33   because god bless you anybody who's [TS]

00:28:34   happy doing what they're doing at the [TS]

00:28:36   horses into it i think they were hoping [TS]

00:28:38   that they got what was comin right but [TS]

00:28:40   it i think you're right if you make [TS]

00:28:41   yourself a lady horse it is on you [TS]

00:28:44   literally the burden is on you right to [TS]

00:28:48   not die from being a lady whore you [TS]

00:28:51   think you would call the next day waited [TS]

00:28:52   you know i think it's a it's a thing [TS]

00:28:55   where the owner of the horse did not [TS]

00:28:58   approve this sounds like we could be [TS]

00:29:00   getting into something tell mudak notice [TS]

00:29:02   seeking around but well this is [TS]

00:29:03   something like this is the condition a [TS]

00:29:05   lot of complexity in this and I think [TS]

00:29:06   because it did you just say no offense [TS]

00:29:08   as though I would be offended by you [TS]

00:29:10   making it might be something went from [TS]

00:29:11   there might be something in the pen took [TS]

00:29:13   i'm not sure but i think this is the [TS]

00:29:14   kind of thing where whether or not you [TS]

00:29:16   agree with this matter whether you want [TS]

00:29:18   think being a lady horses ethical [TS]

00:29:20   regardless of your religious background [TS]

00:29:21   I don't wanna get into religion I think [TS]

00:29:23   there are people that would have this [TS]

00:29:24   discussion about about about some of [TS]

00:29:26   these very things valentine's day is [TS]

00:29:27   Valentine's Day something I need to do [TS]

00:29:29   assuming you are not killed by the horse [TS]

00:29:30   that's fucking you what is the [TS]

00:29:31   obligation of that horse did that horse [TS]

00:29:33   internet freely have what the judge [TS]

00:29:35   Wapner is called a meeting of the minds [TS]

00:29:36   I think these are these are things you [TS]

00:29:37   think about because you know there's a [TS]

00:29:39   lot of stuff happening in the world [TS]

00:29:40   today John and I think I think we're [TS]

00:29:42   going to be facing more and more of the [TS]

00:29:44   lady horse type situations necklace is [TS]

00:29:46   necklace movie [TS]

00:29:47   no compliment yeah I I don't know a lot [TS]

00:29:50   about horses [TS]

00:29:51   although my cousin runs a horse [TS]

00:29:54   rehabilitation clinic outside of Austin [TS]

00:29:56   yeah but in my mind that existed even [TS]

00:29:59   drinking no no not for alcoholic courses [TS]

00:30:03   for like racehorses and thoroughbred [TS]

00:30:05   horse alcohol so like that's later on [TS]

00:30:07   that date for the racing no no it's that [TS]

00:30:09   they get hurt okay but you don't get [TS]

00:30:12   used to a horse would get hurt and you [TS]

00:30:14   shoot it because that because it was the [TS]

00:30:16   old west and and that's what you did in [TS]

00:30:18   the Old West if something you didn't [TS]

00:30:19   know what to do something he shot it but [TS]

00:30:22   now they have other they can do other [TS]

00:30:24   things they can get the horse they can [TS]

00:30:26   make a six-million-dollar horse that's [TS]

00:30:28   better faster stronger then obviously [TS]

00:30:31   the scene with a skirt and that's going [TS]

00:30:34   to describing to the parts where he'd be [TS]

00:30:35   able to do now [TS]

00:30:36   and for another thing i did not write [TS]

00:30:39   this is against my better judgment you [TS]

00:30:40   now have a bionic horsecock yeah super [TS]

00:30:43   an antenna I'm but I but my my [TS]

00:30:49   experience of horses is that if you if [TS]

00:30:51   you make yourself a lady horse for a [TS]

00:30:53   horse and the following day you don't [TS]

00:30:56   know what to get them [TS]

00:30:57   alfalfa haha a horse will always [TS]

00:31:00   appreciate a bouquet of alfalfa and it [TS]

00:31:03   and it really works for any situation it [TS]

00:31:06   works if they're recovering from [TS]

00:31:07   six-million-dollar horse surgeries for [TS]

00:31:09   success if you were a lady horse for the [TS]

00:31:11   night before in here wish I the next day [TS]

00:31:14   alfalfa I I know your link i just way [TS]

00:31:23   too early i don't think i don't think [TS]

00:31:25   horses contrived in the same way that [TS]

00:31:27   people do I think horses like dogs which [TS]

00:31:29   people also liked to be fucked by I [TS]

00:31:31   think I think horse snorts is mainly [TS]

00:31:33   want to please us they weren't feel [TS]

00:31:35   useful like border collies their earnest [TS]

00:31:37   earnest animals [TS]

00:31:38   yeah and so I I don't know see this is [TS]

00:31:40   the problem now i feel like i'm outside [TS]

00:31:42   I'm outside my element and i'm going to [TS]

00:31:44   say things that are gonna get me in [TS]

00:31:45   trouble but I don't think horses [TS]

00:31:46   overthink this stuff but the other [TS]

00:31:49   problems horses don't have phones at [TS]

00:31:50   least not in the same way that we do [TS]

00:31:51   right maybe that could be on the [TS]

00:31:53   facebook or something [TS]

00:31:54   this is very complicated today John i [TS]

00:31:55   said this before but i think the [TS]

00:31:56   valentine's Day is a test I think it's a [TS]

00:31:58   way to find out what somebody really [TS]

00:31:59   thinks about you and I personally we can [TS]

00:32:02   I just say like a lady horsing aside i [TS]

00:32:04   think i would love to be in a [TS]

00:32:05   relationship where was that clear that [TS]

00:32:06   when we love each other we have for sex [TS]

00:32:08   and then give each other alpha with [TS]

00:32:10   could you can you think back over the [TS]

00:32:11   last 20 years how much simpler [TS]

00:32:12   everything would be if i could have just [TS]

00:32:15   given a bouquet of alfalfa and [TS]

00:32:19   everything would be right there so many [TS]

00:32:21   garter belts I want to take back here's [TS]

00:32:22   the thing about domesticated horse you [TS]

00:32:24   remember that a horse does not is not [TS]

00:32:26   automatically domesticated horses is [TS]

00:32:30   free in the wind and you have to break [TS]

00:32:32   the horse horse of course you have [TS]

00:32:34   haha you have to put a saddle on the [TS]

00:32:39   horse and make the horse learn to like [TS]

00:32:42   it and ok now you get into my territory [TS]

00:32:45   in that sense i saw i saw an ad at the [TS]

00:32:48   albertsons isolate the albertsons [TS]

00:32:50   probably six weeks ago dressed up in her [TS]

00:32:53   getting ready to ride a horse outfit [TS]

00:32:54   oh and I almost my car flipped over my [TS]

00:32:57   kitchen is just a pile of like girls [TS]

00:32:59   like groceries and goldfish crackers and [TS]

00:33:01   soups oriented because because she had a [TS]

00:33:03   riding crop and I know whenever the [TS]

00:33:05   crowd part of it just does pants do [TS]

00:33:07   something two ladies behind [TS]

00:33:08   yeah you know I'm a big behind guy make [TS]

00:33:11   it seem wider as with the day that they [TS]

00:33:13   make it seem well cared for those are [TS]

00:33:16   expensive pants and a woman in a pant [TS]

00:33:18   parents like that yes it has an [TS]

00:33:19   expensive bottom you know it's a very [TS]

00:33:21   expensive bottom and you know what [TS]

00:33:22   that's the lady who sought them some [TS]

00:33:24   things through [TS]

00:33:24   you don't just fucking show up at [TS]

00:33:26   albertsons in in the giant boots and [TS]

00:33:28   then the tight pants and a little hat [TS]

00:33:29   you just do that that's crazy [TS]

00:33:31   she knows what she's doing yeah like I'm [TS]

00:33:33   sexy nervous like fuck that this is this [TS]

00:33:34   is this is the real thing that now i [TS]

00:33:36   want to cover more thing she's been to [TS]

00:33:38   the Korean spa and had a lady tweeze [TS]

00:33:40   every last little little piece of downy [TS]

00:33:43   fur out of her bottom [TS]

00:33:45   did you get that from horse always talk [TS]

00:33:47   about bleaching know her own down if [TS]

00:33:49   ever came out just thinking get your [TS]

00:33:51   butt bleach know about that I didn't [TS]

00:33:53   know about that [TS]

00:33:54   okay here's the thing that one thing i [TS]

00:33:56   want to close the door close the hole on [TS]

00:33:58   the real thing here's the thing [TS]

00:33:59   now you when you go in I haven't got to [TS]

00:34:01   I'm really I gotta be honest with you I [TS]

00:34:03   look at a lot of terrifying things on [TS]

00:34:04   the internet but I'm there's so many of [TS]

00:34:05   these links I'm not clicking on just [TS]

00:34:07   because I can't write but if memory [TS]

00:34:09   serves this is a this is like what this [TS]

00:34:11   is like buying a pc in the late nineties [TS]

00:34:13   you go in and you give them a lot of [TS]

00:34:15   specificity about what you're looking [TS]

00:34:16   for if memory serves down to things like [TS]

00:34:18   fingernails like you don't want that [TS]

00:34:20   creepy French manicure thing right like [TS]

00:34:22   I don't know I think maybe when you [TS]

00:34:24   choose the body types on i can't say i [TS]

00:34:26   give abyss creations of San Marcos [TS]

00:34:27   California a lot of credit because [TS]

00:34:29   because they put the power in the hands [TS]

00:34:31   of the horse man here I hope they [TS]

00:34:33   sponsor us after this i would like to i [TS]

00:34:36   would like to get if not a free dollar [TS]

00:34:38   at least some money on something like [TS]

00:34:41   you might like to least get one he's got [TS]

00:34:42   one of these ladies to spin [TS]

00:34:44   you know what take around the block who [TS]

00:34:46   I'm not going to deny it [TS]

00:34:48   Iran curious i think that i would have [TS]

00:34:50   some remorse i think the next day I [TS]

00:34:52   would show up with a with some alfalfa [TS]

00:34:53   and try and yeah smooth it over [TS]

00:34:56   that's right shine the saddle but not [TS]

00:34:58   know if I could set you know what I [TS]

00:35:00   don't know what you like in bed always [TS]

00:35:01   been as Gentiles and remanding have you [TS]

00:35:04   ever met a man who cared about a woman's [TS]

00:35:07   manicure that is that is an example of a [TS]

00:35:12   thing that women do for one another [TS]

00:35:13   I i can't i can't see how I was like oh [TS]

00:35:16   your fingernails [TS]

00:35:18   oh my god when i get this real doll I'm [TS]

00:35:20   gonna have I'm gonna have a I'm gonna [TS]

00:35:22   get her fingernails a certain way like I [TS]

00:35:24   certainly I have never looked at a [TS]

00:35:26   woman's fingernails and thoughts really [TS]

00:35:27   good cricket bat for me okay i think i [TS]

00:35:30   think there is a i can personally to [TS]

00:35:34   answer questions i don't think i have [TS]

00:35:36   but i think there's this whole [TS]

00:35:38   constellation ok so there's all the [TS]

00:35:39   bullshit that every move likes what i [TS]

00:35:42   wanted to have boobs and then is on the [TS]

00:35:43   other side which is like I want her to [TS]

00:35:45   have a prosthetic leg and be named Amy [TS]

00:35:47   me right and then all between the song [TS]

00:35:50   she just flipped the switch is re [TS]

00:35:52   actually Amy I was at the store for that [TS]

00:35:56   importantly the day she got a new one [TS]

00:35:57   here at the prosthetic limb prophetic [TS]

00:35:59   prosthetic limb store is called the [TS]

00:36:01   plaintiff is colliding with my suddenly [TS]

00:36:02   speaking like Elmer fuck off Amy Amy [TS]

00:36:04   seven stumptown holster laughs it's [TS]

00:36:07   actually neighborhood in that pic no [TS]

00:36:09   it's called Portland stumptown a [TS]

00:36:11   Portland used to be called stumptown [TS]

00:36:13   it's alright it was almost a really good [TS]

00:36:15   joke right [TS]

00:36:16   yeah that was a great job and moving on [TS]

00:36:18   the here's the thing i was just a little [TS]

00:36:19   too smart [TS]

00:36:20   yeah okay that's it nice to meet you [TS]

00:36:24   would have said the the the thing about [TS]

00:36:26   this is uh yes yes absolutely there's a [TS]

00:36:29   continuum right and there's in between [TS]

00:36:30   you could call it somewhere between a [TS]

00:36:31   preference in a fetish and I think like [TS]

00:36:34   the fetish folks have a pretty good idea [TS]

00:36:35   of what they're looking for [TS]

00:36:36   we're not always an easy time getting it [TS]

00:36:38   but like you know the further off on the [TS]

00:36:40   continuum you are like the tougher that [TS]

00:36:42   maybe I think I killed all comes in [TS]

00:36:43   handy there because i think actually [TS]

00:36:46   network you its kind of gives you an [TS]

00:36:48   idea of like if you're going to that was [TS]

00:36:50   a pretty good job i want to get this [TS]

00:36:51   right [TS]

00:36:52   well I think they can you can get a kind [TS]

00:36:53   of handy i think i was like i like how [TS]

00:36:55   much can I like choke my doll may [TS]

00:36:57   you gotta break ok alright i couldn't [TS]

00:37:01   thank you [TS]

00:37:02   how much can i took my dog do so with [TS]

00:37:07   the gods later okay with a particularly [TS]

00:37:11   chocobo the faq number 12 how much [TS]

00:37:14   weight can the doll support one sentence [TS]

00:37:18   real dollars can safely support over 400 [TS]

00:37:21   back and I'm sure I swear to you i'm [TS]

00:37:25   sure they're guys who have read that [TS]

00:37:26   make you have gone only 400 pounds darn [TS]

00:37:29   14 tell me more about the dolls entries [TS]

00:37:34   what is the range of dice wasn't better [TS]

00:37:37   Judas Priest record haha what is the [TS]

00:37:40   range of the dolls joints may give me a [TS]

00:37:44   couple more gonna come up can a real [TS]

00:37:45   dogs fingers closed and grip the hand [TS]

00:37:49   each that's the Handy we were talking [TS]

00:37:50   yep there's a lot there's a lot in your [TS]

00:37:52   home against there's lots of stuff in [TS]

00:37:53   here stuff whereas we are hemorrhaging [TS]

00:37:55   listeners right now by the way [TS]

00:37:57   yeah so many people city point you bring [TS]

00:38:00   up a really really excellent point [TS]

00:38:02   though and now we're getting into like [TS]

00:38:03   anthropology is the thing like okay so i [TS]

00:38:05   think you're right i think there are [TS]

00:38:07   some things like let's be honest like [TS]

00:38:09   mostly things like hairstyles definitely [TS]

00:38:12   things like general style of dress [TS]

00:38:15   things like what how you know Steve [TS]

00:38:18   manicures but how you choose to do [TS]

00:38:20   things like keeping those like you know [TS]

00:38:21   like like do you wear a scarf [TS]

00:38:24   do you have this kind of backpack i [TS]

00:38:26   think it's a whole bunch of stuff that [TS]

00:38:27   is like a very much a woman's way like a [TS]

00:38:30   man's way same is like a man would have [TS]

00:38:32   like an expensive thing like you're in a [TS]

00:38:34   nice thing or a signifying thing I think [TS]

00:38:36   there are people who buy iphones because [TS]

00:38:38   they want to be somebody who bought an [TS]

00:38:39   iphone but I think there's a lot of [TS]

00:38:40   things were yes it could be a telegraph [TS]

00:38:42   to two other people and I think I think [TS]

00:38:43   like there's a lot of cute girls [TS]

00:38:44   important i bought a telegraph absolute [TS]

00:38:47   em see that was a smart little too smart [TS]

00:38:50   for once and there's a lot like really [TS]

00:38:52   really cute ladies in portland I [TS]

00:38:54   realized that like would never would [TS]

00:38:55   have anything to do with me but I [TS]

00:38:56   respect that [TS]

00:38:57   yeah and its kind can i get customized [TS]

00:39:00   lobby and nipples as faq number one [TS]

00:39:02   abhiya yes we are able to do customized [TS]

00:39:05   genitalia and nipples your pronunciation [TS]

00:39:08   of certain things is one of the great [TS]

00:39:09   joys for me [TS]

00:39:10   whatever i would like to write them and [TS]

00:39:12   just say could I get salami nipples [TS]

00:39:15   now you're misunderstanding me yeah no [TS]

00:39:18   sir I don't [TS]

00:39:18   mr. game you cannot be so many levels [TS]

00:39:21   did she call with the lampshade the [TS]

00:39:24   thing about girls in portland according [TS]

00:39:26   to this book this them a lot of cute [TS]

00:39:27   girls in portland well there are but [TS]

00:39:29   Portland the used to be at least and I [TS]

00:39:30   think this is still true about it it was [TS]

00:39:33   that it was the place where punk rock [TS]

00:39:35   and hippie perfectly Mel great way to [TS]

00:39:40   put it [TS]

00:39:40   so that every punk rock girl is about [TS]

00:39:43   forty percent hippie and every hippie [TS]

00:39:46   girl is about forty percent punk rock [TS]

00:39:48   but so often it works it shouldn't work [TS]

00:39:50   but it shouldn't work at all but it [TS]

00:39:52   works amazingly so you're driving around [TS]

00:39:54   here like oh look at that stinky but [TS]

00:39:56   you're like alright with she's kind of [TS]

00:39:58   punk and so hot and then you look over [TS]

00:40:01   here like all that punk girl in here oh [TS]

00:40:03   wait but she's kind of hippie like it's [TS]

00:40:06   it's so works and and girl after girl [TS]

00:40:08   after girl and I've never been to [TS]

00:40:10   another place in the universe where [TS]

00:40:12   where the the culture so perfectly [TS]

00:40:16   combines these two generally disgusting [TS]

00:40:20   a sort of sort of stylistic and [TS]

00:40:23   lifestyle choices and and melds it into [TS]

00:40:27   something that's so appealing [TS]

00:40:29   yeah in a way that is if I may say [TS]

00:40:31   organic like it doesn't seem like you [TS]

00:40:33   just slap into things together you know [TS]

00:40:35   I mean rights [TS]

00:40:36   ya know it's absolutely organic right [TS]

00:40:38   it's like these girls all but you seen [TS]

00:40:40   people in portland like ladies that you [TS]

00:40:42   be like say oh that's a very attractive [TS]

00:40:43   woman like you say like she's very [TS]

00:40:45   attractive right well this is this is [TS]

00:40:47   the old idea in your head i went to a [TS]

00:40:49   different town and the girls are all [TS]

00:40:50   cute problem [TS]

00:40:51   well here's the thing if you guys on [TS]

00:40:53   cisco there are so many cute girls and [TS]

00:40:54   services you don't even want to do with [TS]

00:40:56   yourself especially if you just been to [TS]

00:40:57   LA [TS]

00:40:58   oh my god that's like that's like that's [TS]

00:40:59   like real dolls and cars which is a [TS]

00:41:02   great Buzzcocks song okay here's the [TS]

00:41:03   problem now under customs also fake you [TS]

00:41:05   number five can you sculpt a custom [TS]

00:41:06   header likeness from a photo [TS]

00:41:08   o course they can the longer one much [TS]

00:41:10   longer question number 6 under customers [TS]

00:41:12   can have a doll made of a celebrity [TS]

00:41:13   model or my ex-girlfriend if i bring a [TS]

00:41:15   driver's license to you can you make the [TS]

00:41:18   real doll that looks just like the [TS]

00:41:20   person in the drivers have been a lot of [TS]

00:41:22   guys wanted to go to the next step [TS]

00:41:24   which would be cloning which is that if [TS]

00:41:26   i can bring the sock that I stole can [TS]

00:41:30   you can start with the foot obviously if [TS]

00:41:32   i bring some garbage that i found didn't [TS]

00:41:35   buy anything by a foot to fuck that you [TS]

00:41:37   know there's fuckable feet you can buy [TS]

00:41:38   not only did i know this but I saw one [TS]

00:41:41   on the internet the other day not just [TS]

00:41:42   it's not just it's not a lifelike foot [TS]

00:41:44   then you that you are [TS]

00:41:46   frottage engaging it's a foot that has a [TS]

00:41:49   vagina in it [TS]

00:41:50   I haven't seen that that's a good idea [TS]

00:41:52   it's a foot and then ok but on the [TS]

00:41:54   bottom of the foot there's actually a an [TS]

00:41:56   orifice which doesn't look like any [TS]

00:41:59   offices you've seen before is it looks [TS]

00:42:00   like an office that I have seen in other [TS]

00:42:02   locations [TS]

00:42:03   I mean it like this i know i have never [TS]

00:42:05   seen one with a with a with the orifice [TS]

00:42:07   on the bodies in front door back door [TS]

00:42:10   it's a front door the front door and [TS]

00:42:11   it's an enlightened or in a disembodied [TS]

00:42:13   foot which part which part of the fake [TS]

00:42:15   rubber foot like it's on your foot and [TS]

00:42:19   the energy one because old say giant be [TS]

00:42:22   sold in China as you would say the lobby [TS]

00:42:24   area is on the soul of the of the foot [TS]

00:42:28   of the Dead what a great by the way one [TS]

00:42:30   of the great rejected titles for an [TS]

00:42:31   outgoing records all vagina and so the [TS]

00:42:36   thing that I think we still have not [TS]

00:42:37   fully established is that this is a [TS]

00:42:39   bespoke fate so we get your term right [TS]

00:42:42   this is a bespoke it up you do get the [TS]

00:42:46   pic i was writing this your free [TS]

00:42:48   discussion and I don't derail but it's a [TS]

00:42:49   very important question so yes on the [TS]

00:42:51   continuum on the one side you got really [TS]

00:42:53   don't want to get derailed from this ma [TS]

00:42:55   I you know what I'm John we've been [TS]

00:42:57   friends for several years and i have to [TS]

00:42:59   tell you I never I'd very some think [TS]

00:43:02   ahead I'm just very happy to just do [TS]

00:43:03   things with you as you know but like [TS]

00:43:05   it's hard for me to think of a [TS]

00:43:08   non-obvious topic that needs deeper [TS]

00:43:11   penetration in this issue i think we can [TS]

00:43:13   talk about music we store going to have [TS]

00:43:14   our Paul McCartney shows i'm gonna [TS]

00:43:16   bullshit the anybody could guess boy [TS]

00:43:18   generally gonna talk about toilet paper [TS]

00:43:19   and food let me go fucking get my anyway [TS]

00:43:22   so here's the many of my toilet paper [TS]

00:43:23   and fruit so i can that's why along well [TS]

00:43:25   that's alright that's right there's a [TS]

00:43:28   lot of customization available you can [TS]

00:43:29   get the kind of hair you want to stop [TS]

00:43:30   this in a minute by trying to scare you [TS]

00:43:32   can't let me let me know yes now please [TS]

00:43:34   jump in [TS]

00:43:35   let me ask here it is what you're saying [TS]

00:43:36   is it is impossible [TS]

00:43:38   want to buy a stock realdoll you have to [TS]

00:43:41   make a custom rules you're going to make [TS]

00:43:43   me click on things you can't just buy [TS]

00:43:45   like version a you have to say i want i [TS]

00:43:48   want with no you're not getting off that [TS]

00:43:50   easy buddy [TS]

00:43:51   I want Angelina Jolie lips and i want i [TS]

00:43:53   want to challenge [TS]

00:43:55   charlize theron such oh my spirit our [TS]

00:43:58   King god I'm so sorry I've done breaking [TS]

00:44:00   all my rules defined i'm typing I'm [TS]

00:44:03   looking at the internet and i'm sending [TS]

00:44:05   you a link in the robot I'm sorry [TS]

00:44:07   portions here I don't whatever her name [TS]

00:44:09   is you can buy the here's the thing you [TS]

00:44:11   get a standard female with all three [TS]

00:44:12   entries first of all from now on I'm [TS]

00:44:15   calling all of the penetrable lady parts [TS]

00:44:17   entries holy my goodness that's six [TS]

00:44:20   thousand dollars for that almost 5999 [TS]

00:44:23   now scroll down you can get elf ears [TS]

00:44:25   front if you don't keep going keep going [TS]

00:44:26   to be in tears skin tone skin tone skin [TS]

00:44:29   tones expression of cases that looks [TS]

00:44:31   like tawny kitaen I was sure does what [TS]

00:44:34   she's the one married to one married the [TS]

00:44:36   guy in Journey oh I was a tiny Kane tiny [TS]

00:44:39   tiny can contain me and was married to [TS]

00:44:41   the guy from whitesnake David Coverdale [TS]

00:44:43   shemale doll [TS]

00:44:45   yeah yeah good now John can just be [TS]

00:44:47   clear that what you're watching a look [TS]

00:44:49   at the first times under option a [TS]

00:44:50   detachable penis [TS]

00:44:52   oh my god that's the king missile song [TS]

00:44:53   detachable promote detachable penis you [TS]

00:44:57   know it's disappointing show everyone [TS]

00:44:58   200 that's a modest matches the worst i [TS]

00:45:01   don't regret from from yeah that's his [TS]

00:45:04   names like John Donne faces on the same [TS]

00:45:06   doctor dr. Phil what the username San [TS]

00:45:08   Francisco he seems nice but what you're [TS]

00:45:10   saying the modest mouse was the most [TS]

00:45:11   disappointing rock show you've ever been [TS]

00:45:13   to [TS]

00:45:13   yep I don't want to get derailed from [TS]

00:45:15   the shemale real doll but what happened [TS]

00:45:17   to the modest mouse concert i hope they [TS]

00:45:19   were high because I hope they were out [TS]

00:45:22   there either high or I hope they were [TS]

00:45:24   mad about craft services because I've [TS]

00:45:25   never been to any more phoned in fucking [TS]

00:45:27   show in my entire life this is nineteen [TS]

00:45:29   ninety seven or eight seals around the [TS]

00:45:32   real size of the real west highway west [TS]

00:45:34   what the fuck's that they had that they [TS]

00:45:36   were there huffing modeling glue at that [TS]

00:45:38   point but they are guys from them you [TS]

00:45:39   don't you know I i can i can enjoy a lot [TS]

00:45:41   of things John I like a lot of different [TS]

00:45:43   kinds of music you know I don't like a [TS]

00:45:45   low show because I don't like being [TS]

00:45:46   shushed and being told to sit [TS]

00:45:48   indian-style yeah I want to go to a low [TS]

00:45:50   show I mean shush to two different [TS]

00:45:51   locations for a permanently attached [TS]

00:45:53   penis with testicles but no vagina add [TS]

00:45:56   seven hundred and fifty dollars for your [TS]

00:45:57   order [TS]

00:45:58   can I just ask is there is there [TS]

00:45:59   anything to be lost by making it [TS]

00:46:01   detachable because it seems to me that [TS]

00:46:02   you know you've got options now let me [TS]

00:46:04   ask you this when you detach it what do [TS]

00:46:05   you have there is it is it a bolt is an [TS]

00:46:07   entry but he has a question then you [TS]

00:46:10   know you can change you can change to a [TS]

00:46:13   different size penis attachment [TS]

00:46:15   additionally this attachment for [TS]

00:46:17   tutoring for Johnny being cynical about [TS]

00:46:19   this there are stairs so much to this [TS]

00:46:21   that we're not taking into account we're [TS]

00:46:22   coming in and we're just making jokes [TS]

00:46:23   about this this is flexibility this is [TS]

00:46:25   what your ability absence see is [TS]

00:46:27   permanently attached penis no testicles [TS]

00:46:29   but with the vagina intact and that cost [TS]

00:46:32   a thousand dollars [TS]

00:46:33   oh and that's what Jamie Jamie Lee [TS]

00:46:35   Curtis kind deal you have ever you have [TS]

00:46:37   every option then can I get you to click [TS]

00:46:40   on female realdoll to the left rail [TS]

00:46:42   alright that is not what I'm impressed [TS]

00:46:44   with his custom skin tones you probably [TS]

00:46:47   already there are you already there you [TS]

00:46:48   can get a blue doll what no I all sizes [TS]

00:46:51   yet you're in the moment with the label [TS]

00:46:52   realdoll to is what you're so funny you [TS]

00:46:54   say that cause I've developed a crush on [TS]

00:46:56   a blue lady in Star Wars needs that name [TS]

00:46:59   is all whether your name is at Ayla Ayla [TS]

00:47:00   sakura she and the ischemia could [TS]

00:47:04   cantina scene are you talking about one [TS]

00:47:06   of the non-canonical Star Wars no no [TS]

00:47:08   it's canonical well as canonical in the [TS]

00:47:10   sense that is clone wars and now when I [TS]

00:47:13   it's it's a cartoon watching the kids [TS]

00:47:15   ooic it's one of the team that gets in [TS]

00:47:18   between two and three [TS]

00:47:19   it's Star Wars fanfic no no no no no no [TS]

00:47:22   it's it's a really good cartoon don't [TS]

00:47:25   look at the later ones that will give [TS]

00:47:26   you the right idea [TS]

00:47:27   ok so another thing about I I'm I'm [TS]

00:47:29   attracted to the victoria model and 10 [TS]

00:47:33   Layla is kinda nice too huh [TS]

00:47:35   please continue looking up with that [TS]

00:47:38   might mean it's Victoria's kind of seems [TS]

00:47:40   like an Irish last kind of wide faced [TS]

00:47:42   Irish girl and she seems mad she seems a [TS]

00:47:45   little drunk and you getting it was nice [TS]

00:47:48   as the edge like seven minutes long [TS]

00:47:49   after you come in here there's a really [TS]

00:47:50   long on piano kota up that too smart [TS]

00:47:55   they're not smart enough [TS]

00:47:56   oh IC we talked about this blue cartoons [TS]

00:47:58   yeah [TS]

00:47:59   she has that girl was in the original [TS]

00:48:01   Star Wars well [TS]

00:48:03   oh here is it wasn't she on on on boba [TS]

00:48:07   fett Iran the job of the huts sex barge [TS]

00:48:10   oh no I think again you know she's the [TS]

00:48:12   same and she's got a two-hour lack I [TS]

00:48:14   think I've gotten a lot of secure wasn't [TS]

00:48:16   while I was gone [TS]

00:48:18   yeah I don't know looking at right no no [TS]

00:48:20   I know you're talking about you're [TS]

00:48:21   talking about you're just throwing to [TS]

00:48:22   the the rank or because he's displeased [TS]

00:48:23   with her right [TS]

00:48:25   yeah no no she's a toilet she apparently [TS]

00:48:27   she wears that outfit because it gives [TS]

00:48:28   according to wiki wiki pedia because it [TS]

00:48:31   gives her more flexibility as a Jedi [TS]

00:48:33   well she's glad she's a fucking Jedi and [TS]

00:48:36   she's like super confident and blue and [TS]

00:48:39   her head dependency that she's a [TS]

00:48:41   twilight they'll have that that so that [TS]

00:48:43   wasn't why I like you saw John John you [TS]

00:48:45   even know where wikipedia is on the [TS]

00:48:48   Internet [TS]

00:48:48   John just go search for Wikipedia and [TS]

00:48:52   yes it does have two hours and 2 e's [TS]

00:48:53   John can I ask you to please click and [TS]

00:48:56   let's leave let's leave or I'll behind [TS]

00:48:58   me why don't you know about her right [TS]

00:49:00   now let's go to female realdoll to the [TS]

00:49:02   left trail for anybody playing along i [TS]

00:49:04   hope you can figure all this out again I [TS]

00:49:05   actually apologized a final time you get [TS]

00:49:08   a little too I'm bearing that you are [TS]

00:49:10   they have been the industry leader since [TS]

00:49:11   1996 i would like to extend a really [TS]

00:49:14   serious apology to everybody at realdoll [TS]

00:49:16   TM of San someplace [TS]

00:49:18   ok imitating GRU there i don't care [TS]

00:49:21   about to order form she was she weighs [TS]

00:49:24   80 pounds of his five-foot-three this is [TS]

00:49:26   the problem with not finishing the first [TS]

00:49:27   part of this this is a really real [TS]

00:49:29   fucking real doll like it weighs stuff [TS]

00:49:31   you pick it up and it feels like a lady [TS]

00:49:32   fielding an honest-to-god actual real [TS]

00:49:34   dead rubber girl [TS]

00:49:36   ok so anybody's going to this I don't [TS]

00:49:39   know here's your skin tone options fair [TS]

00:49:42   fair asian who medium medium tan the [TS]

00:49:48   headlight African light African you [TS]

00:49:50   can't get a dark effort there's no [TS]

00:49:51   fucking Grace Jones button i click the [TS]

00:49:54   shit out of that see that that offended [TS]

00:49:56   now Mara your Bishop should be a darker [TS]

00:49:58   can I get in tomorrow with a fair they [TS]

00:50:01   do a preview I but it's not all laughter [TS]

00:50:03   probably crazy if you got a bar but with [TS]

00:50:05   fair skin [TS]

00:50:06   yeah but you know what she'd look like [TS]

00:50:07   should look like an albino black girl I [TS]

00:50:09   look at every one of these real doll [TS]

00:50:11   faces and I see a problem in [TS]

00:50:13   this relationship with every one of [TS]

00:50:14   these faces and all my fault you know in [TS]

00:50:16   high school my high school girlfriend [TS]

00:50:19   was a redhead girl what's her name her [TS]

00:50:22   name was Kelly she was a she was a [TS]

00:50:24   german irish girl she had all burnt hair [TS]

00:50:26   and freckles [TS]

00:50:27   Wow is she strong confident she was very [TS]

00:50:30   confident but we were walking down the [TS]

00:50:32   street one day and this is in the [TS]

00:50:33   eighties of course and she had her hair [TS]

00:50:37   I think she had done her auburn hair in [TS]

00:50:39   cornrows is because yeah I didn't like [TS]

00:50:42   it either but it was the eighties and so [TS]

00:50:44   it was everybody thought that they were [TS]

00:50:46   gonna be bo Derek for a week and a half [TS]

00:50:47   right yet she had her she had her hair [TS]

00:50:50   in cornrows were walking down the street [TS]

00:50:52   and some rednecks drive by and roll down [TS]

00:50:56   the window and shout out nigger lover [TS]

00:50:59   and now their friend out to you and we [TS]

00:51:02   looked around and we were the only [TS]

00:51:04   people on the street and then she looked [TS]

00:51:05   at me and I looked at her and she [TS]

00:51:08   started laughing she was like they think [TS]

00:51:09   I'm black God and I looked at her and [TS]

00:51:13   all of a sudden you know this incredibly [TS]

00:51:15   light skin to freckle-faced Irish girl [TS]

00:51:18   with cornrows it transformed in my eyes [TS]

00:51:22   to an albino black girl who has that [TS]

00:51:25   kind of you know when the ANC of albino [TS]

00:51:27   black person they look like a redheaded [TS]

00:51:28   Irish girl and we had oh my god we're i [TS]

00:51:32   think you may have found some kind of [TS]

00:51:33   human wormhole that's really where Jon [TS]

00:51:35   that's exactly what we realized then [TS]

00:51:37   that race was a myth well we learned a [TS]

00:51:40   lesson about love [TS]

00:51:41   moving on it now for your finger and toe [TS]

00:51:43   nail color are you going French manicure [TS]

00:51:45   pink red burgundy or bronze think i'm [TS]

00:51:47   gonna go I don't like any of these I [TS]

00:51:49   want just known to get no polish that's [TS]

00:51:51   not an option [TS]

00:51:52   what's your guess I guess read it seems [TS]

00:51:54   kinda also French manicure [TS]

00:51:56   I hate French manicure so much about you [TS]

00:51:58   too but you know what time are we don't [TS]

00:52:00   have time anymore [TS]

00:52:01   Oh nuts are so disgusting it just says [TS]

00:52:03   it just says like business is deaf girl [TS]

00:52:05   now hairstyle this is going to be [TS]

00:52:07   complicated i get a custom hairstyle i [TS]

00:52:09   don't want natural lips because those [TS]

00:52:11   don't look natural looks like peach [TS]

00:52:12   I wish to hell yeah I wish they'd let me [TS]

00:52:14   read this on this website forum this is [TS]

00:52:16   that there's a lot of you I things that [TS]

00:52:18   they can make a lot easier here I think [TS]

00:52:19   if i'm only like seven ish yo male [TS]

00:52:22   converter for 30 yet [TS]

00:52:24   the John echo slamming has friends would [TS]

00:52:28   say my hand to God I think we saw that [TS]

00:52:30   at the exact same second oh boy you [TS]

00:52:32   don't want to zoom in on that I do i do [TS]

00:52:35   not i'm sitting out consumed in zooming [TS]

00:52:37   out i'm zooming out across the room [TS]

00:52:40   I don't look like let's take either a [TS]

00:52:42   workout machine or some kind of a frosty [TS]

00:52:44   drink maker and I don't think maybe [TS]

00:52:47   maybe a video game like a flight based [TS]

00:52:49   video game don't see how architectural [TS]

00:52:51   II that can support a 400-pound man i [TS]

00:52:54   think i think the little dingus that [TS]

00:52:55   holds it into the the shell of the dead [TS]

00:52:58   lady dead rubber lady body is going to [TS]

00:53:00   be very strong it's going to steal based [TS]

00:53:02   yeah there's there's titanium or you [TS]

00:53:04   know what it is it's a terminator body [TS]

00:53:05   under there [TS]

00:53:06   ok I was where I was worried that glands [TS]

00:53:08   just gonna pop right off its it's some [TS]

00:53:10   kind of Terminator thing and and that [TS]

00:53:12   way if you can I don't know what you [TS]

00:53:14   would I mean the only reason to have [TS]

00:53:16   that appendage that apparatus attached [TS]

00:53:18   to this girl is that you would sit up [TS]

00:53:21   and I just figured make yourself a lady [TS]

00:53:23   horse riding cinema and sit on this [TS]

00:53:26   well there it is John there is no sorry [TS]

00:53:27   I don't interrupt you but here is [TS]

00:53:28   question answered little to the shemale [TS]

00:53:30   converter that I just sent you that [TS]

00:53:32   explains that they're using physics but [TS]

00:53:35   that still doesn't seem like call maybe [TS]

00:53:37   I'm going to examine it out of silicone [TS]

00:53:38   responds it's a five basic machines now [TS]

00:53:41   can John kind of plants all you have to [TS]

00:53:43   work out for four minutes a day that's [TS]

00:53:45   right and the exercise machine cost [TS]

00:53:48   forty thousand dollars that's right it's [TS]

00:53:49   30 pounds of solid steel can i point out [TS]

00:53:51   two things that I just figured out where [TS]

00:53:54   the real money is so you say yes yes sir [TS]

00:53:56   you will be paying six thousand dollars [TS]

00:53:57   for these kind of point out two things [TS]

00:53:59   oh wait a minute shit i have so much to [TS]

00:54:01   cover vagina attachment style permanent [TS]

00:54:03   or removable but look at this [TS]

00:54:05   ok so good on extra google vagina don't [TS]

00:54:07   go down to extra options and what do you [TS]

00:54:09   see one cup just literally one cup size [TS]

00:54:13   larger breasts how much uh I I navigated [TS]

00:54:18   away like I couldn't look anymore but [TS]

00:54:20   now it now you have to walk me back [TS]

00:54:22   through there but now i'm looking at elf [TS]

00:54:24   ears is the other page here's the thing [TS]

00:54:26   like I'm at Comic Con here [TS]

00:54:28   ok so because it is lots of men like [TS]

00:54:31   comic-con requires one girl with elf [TS]

00:54:34   ears around and a lot of men looking [TS]

00:54:37   mater runner behind surrounded by 6400 [TS]

00:54:40   round metal hard for me to understand [TS]

00:54:41   why you won't go to that ok so here's [TS]

00:54:43   the thing that reason of these these [TS]

00:54:44   don't come back to that there's a these [TS]

00:54:47   ladies these real doll ladies is that I [TS]

00:54:49   say that right real dog again I want to [TS]

00:54:50   apologize to the real tall people tried [TS]

00:54:52   Merle damn these these dolls institue as [TS]

00:54:56   they arrive have what I would describe [TS]

00:54:57   in context as something very near jugs [TS]

00:55:01   the two basic models have either so [TS]

00:55:04   there's the 33 morning there c cups and [TS]

00:55:06   personally I gotta say of all the cops [TS]

00:55:08   to see cup is one of my favorite cups i [TS]

00:55:10   think the C cup is I think it's good [TS]

00:55:12   amount of like a medium-sized coke 0 [TS]

00:55:13   underneath the human female converter [TS]

00:55:17   yes you did not see the click here to [TS]

00:55:20   see the masterpiece eyes collected on [TS]

00:55:23   closing that I just above that John [TS]

00:55:25   please look at one cup size larger [TS]

00:55:26   breasts and tell me the number [TS]

00:55:28   850 bucks for what you want to deke up [TS]

00:55:31   you're going to pay a hundred fifty [TS]

00:55:32   dollars Martin out man get you to go to [TS]

00:55:34   the very bottom of the page and look for [TS]

00:55:35   the red text because I think this is [TS]

00:55:36   where it all comes together [TS]

00:55:37   realdoll express $500 your dollars [TS]

00:55:40   guaranteed to be manufactured and [TS]

00:55:42   shipped within four weeks of reform [TS]

00:55:43   receipt of payment huh [TS]

00:55:45   Wow normal manufacturing time is [TS]

00:55:48   estimated at eight weeks could be longer [TS]

00:55:50   is your question you spent this is [TS]

00:55:52   something i learned back in the day as [TS]

00:55:53   you know used to do things with web [TS]

00:55:54   pages and that well first we under the [TS]

00:55:57   economic notion of sunk cost fallacy we [TS]

00:55:59   all know that for example if I get [TS]

00:56:00   somebody fill out to fill out the first [TS]

00:56:02   like page of a form let's say all I'm [TS]

00:56:04   asking for is your name and city just [TS]

00:56:06   that act of making you go to the next [TS]

00:56:08   page really stupid oddly enough [TS]

00:56:11   increases the chances that you'll fill [TS]

00:56:12   out the whole form because you've [TS]

00:56:13   already spent some time on it now here's [TS]

00:56:15   the thing this this i could see somebody [TS]

00:56:18   getting a bottle of absolut and spending [TS]

00:56:21   a real long time filling out this form [TS]

00:56:22   trying some different things I've done [TS]

00:56:24   this with building max like not inside [TS]

00:56:26   what if I get this hard drive what if i [TS]

00:56:27   get that hard drive you get down to the [TS]

00:56:28   bottom and you've been thinking a lot [TS]

00:56:30   about all the different ways you can you [TS]

00:56:32   can fuck you you're dead rubber girl [TS]

00:56:34   prices begin to the bottom and you see [TS]

00:56:36   that little clique box for real doll [TS]

00:56:39   express and you realize your your life [TS]

00:56:41   there's a fork in the road now my friend [TS]

00:56:42   you can either wait you can wait for [TS]

00:56:45   four weeks to fuck a dead rubber girl [TS]

00:56:50   you can wait for eight weeks to find you [TS]

00:56:52   could add but you pay big five hundred [TS]

00:56:54   dollars and cut your time in half [TS]

00:56:56   you're literally you're literally [TS]

00:56:57   spending that is why I just clarify one [TS]

00:56:59   thing I want to apologize to the real [TS]

00:57:01   doll family [TS]

00:57:02   it includes all three entries but there [TS]

00:57:04   but this is the this is the thing if you [TS]

00:57:06   can see the thing about her wonder what [TS]

00:57:08   it is is you're paying five hundred [TS]

00:57:10   dollars which is comparatively small [TS]

00:57:11   amount of money that's exactly what i'm [TS]

00:57:13   doing right now in the calculator and [TS]

00:57:14   picture will never ever ever be alone [TS]

00:57:16   again put that order to in fact be [TS]

00:57:20   permanently alone and that is no that's [TS]

00:57:23   no small thing that's worth fun can't [TS]

00:57:24   put a price on that John I mean by [TS]

00:57:26   permanently lonely in a way that really [TS]

00:57:28   works plus having this fucking white [TS]

00:57:29   fingernails and a dong you can take out [TS]

00:57:31   for there's options here that you're [TS]

00:57:33   just not gonna find a lot of places [TS]

00:57:35   there's this is flexibility John yeah [TS]

00:57:37   you can get tan lines [TS]

00:57:39   I'm going with michelle will go with [TS]

00:57:41   Michelle I don't you know what the [TS]

00:57:43   gibson cut guitar company used to have a [TS]

00:57:45   website where you can go on and make [TS]

00:57:46   your own Les Paul mhm and I went on [TS]

00:57:49   there are many many many times and made [TS]

00:57:51   my fantasy les paul and i never clicked [TS]

00:57:53   by right at my parents did that with [TS]

00:57:56   catalogs and they never have money to [TS]

00:57:57   fill out college then never send it in [TS]

00:57:59   yeah and then they stop them to quit [TS]

00:58:00   doing it and they quit having that on [TS]

00:58:03   their website because it was too useful [TS]

00:58:06   it was too it was to like good and so [TS]

00:58:10   yeah let me just guess that you're not [TS]

00:58:12   representing them [TS]

00:58:13   no no I am but but i don't i don't care [TS]

00:58:17   anymore so one time I was in I was in [TS]

00:58:20   nashville and I went to the gibson [TS]

00:58:22   custom guitar a manufacturing area which [TS]

00:58:27   is not where they make all the Gibson's [TS]

00:58:29   it's where they make the it's the custom [TS]

00:58:30   shop and when I got a tour of it because [TS]

00:58:33   I was you know and sponsored by them and [TS]

00:58:36   we're walking around and you know that [TS]

00:58:37   there's les pauls everywhere [TS]

00:58:39   SG everywhere and all these beautiful [TS]

00:58:41   guitar body's natural you know on just [TS]

00:58:45   like the natural wood like there's not [TS]

00:58:47   like a sunburst or anything on the edge [TS]

00:58:48   looks like just nothing it's just a [TS]

00:58:50   piece of work there's not even a neck on [TS]

00:58:51   it [TS]

00:58:52   and I'm like so what if i took that and [TS]

00:58:56   i put this neck on it and I put those [TS]

00:58:57   pickups on it and I was doing the thing [TS]

00:58:59   that I used to do on the website except [TS]

00:59:00   i was doing it in person with these with [TS]

00:59:03   these amazing parts there's little years [TS]

00:59:05   where they call luthiers all standing [TS]

00:59:07   around all the people that have been you [TS]

00:59:08   know the little old ladies who are like [TS]

00:59:10   smoking cigarettes with the really long [TS]

00:59:11   fingernails and their their their ladies [TS]

00:59:14   at the gibson custom shop whose job it [TS]

00:59:16   is to take a razor blade and just scrape [TS]

00:59:19   the paint off of the binding with this [TS]

00:59:23   kind of perfect love without nicking in [TS]

00:59:26   yeah and it's not done by a machine it's [TS]

00:59:28   these lives these little sixty-year-old [TS]

00:59:30   chain-smoking ladies who just sit with a [TS]

00:59:33   razor blade all day and just peel the [TS]

00:59:34   paint off of the binding after the [TS]

00:59:36   guitars have been sprayed i'm watching [TS]

00:59:38   this and I'm like okay here's the guitar [TS]

00:59:40   i want and i am talking to the guy who [TS]

00:59:42   you know who runs the custom shop and I [TS]

00:59:44   get to the end of my little soliloquy [TS]

00:59:46   and basically what I what I have [TS]

00:59:47   described as neil young's black 54 less [TS]

00:59:52   ball or whatever but but made for me to [TS]

00:59:54   pick ups [TS]

00:59:55   no just too and the guy says yeah that'd [TS]

00:59:59   be great [TS]

00:59:59   [Music] [TS]

00:59:59   [Music] [TS]

01:00:00   and we could totally do that except [TS]

01:00:02   we're not allowed to because the guy [TS]

01:00:06   that owns the company doesn't want us to [TS]

01:00:09   spend time making custom cool guitars [TS]

01:00:12   for people he wants everybody to buy the [TS]

01:00:14   59 Les Paul reissue because he doesn't [TS]

01:00:18   know what guitar players are like [TS]

01:00:20   because he bought the company and this [TS]

01:00:23   is what's going out of business because [TS]

01:00:24   he's a rich guy about the company [TS]

01:00:26   because he's a rich guy and he doesn't [TS]

01:00:28   he's always trying to he's always coming [TS]

01:00:30   down here and saying I know let's make a [TS]

01:00:32   Les Paul that's covered with flames and [TS]

01:00:35   purple fur that'll get the whole get one [TS]

01:00:38   the sponsored by cheerios i will get the [TS]

01:00:40   whole purple further inflame minute you [TS]

01:00:42   did you demand satisfaction you you mind [TS]

01:00:44   walking what your mother can you imagine [TS]

01:00:46   i cannot John academy i can imagine that [TS]

01:00:48   you knocked a couple people down and [TS]

01:00:49   literally ran up the stairs and busted [TS]

01:00:51   down the door is fucking office there [TS]

01:00:53   was nothing there [TS]

01:00:54   I bet he wasn't even there he wasn't [TS]

01:00:55   there fucker here's what I learned all [TS]

01:00:57   the people at the gibson custom shop are [TS]

01:00:59   all guitar makers and they all looked at [TS]

01:01:01   me with sad eyes and said yeah can you [TS]

01:01:05   imagine what it's like for us here who [TS]

01:01:07   have the not just all at the access to [TS]

01:01:10   this stuff but we have the ability we [TS]

01:01:12   are craftspeople and we would like [TS]

01:01:15   nothing more than for you to come in [TS]

01:01:16   here and tell us your custom Les Paul [TS]

01:01:18   dream but we can't do it because there's [TS]

01:01:21   not a SKU number this is a an exact [TS]

01:01:24   quote there's no SKU number for the [TS]

01:01:26   skills are very important in business [TS]

01:01:27   and I said want to limit your number of [TS]

01:01:29   skis at the time I didn't know what ask [TS]

01:01:31   you was and I said what's the difference [TS]

01:01:33   it's a blessed Paul you painted this [TS]

01:01:34   color instead of that color there like [TS]

01:01:36   now we painted a different color it's [TS]

01:01:38   got a different SKU number that's the [TS]

01:01:39   rule and they all look so defeated they [TS]

01:01:42   look so sad as they made one after [TS]

01:01:44   another identical 59 Les Paul reissue [TS]

01:01:47   and I i walked out of there with my [TS]

01:01:50   shoulders slumped I mean it was a [TS]

01:01:52   beautiful experience to see the guitars [TS]

01:01:54   made and to meet all these wonderful [TS]

01:01:55   people but I was slumped shoulders that [TS]

01:01:59   someone could have you know that [TS]

01:02:02   here's what the guy here's what they [TS]

01:02:03   said they said his model the owner of [TS]

01:02:06   Gibson guitars his model is harley [TS]

01:02:08   davidson I'll for the love of God she [TS]

01:02:11   wants to have that kind of [TS]

01:02:13   so he wants to sell a bunch of bullshit [TS]

01:02:14   two balls suburban guys and ruin the [TS]

01:02:16   whole thing that made this good in the [TS]

01:02:17   first place [TS]

01:02:18   yeah he's like we can make a lot more [TS]

01:02:20   money selling keychains thats a Gibson [TS]

01:02:22   on them then we can selling guitar [TS]

01:02:24   oh my god what's this guy's name I don't [TS]

01:02:26   know i don't know i'm probably going to [TS]

01:02:28   get in trouble but who cares [TS]

01:02:30   am i stepping ahead in my jumping ahead [TS]

01:02:31   too far here John are you thinking what [TS]

01:02:32   I'm thinking which is i pray to god this [TS]

01:02:34   cocksucker never buys real doll and [TS]

01:02:37   again I want to apologize to the people [TS]

01:02:38   a real doll and I want to see what I'm [TS]

01:02:40   afraid of is that there's going to be a [TS]

01:02:41   Gibson branded realdoll are seriously f [TS]

01:02:45   holes honor and Finance Ministry's half [TS]

01:02:48   inches in addition to the three normal [TS]

01:02:50   entries there b2f entries and I'm much [TS]

01:02:53   more worried about this cocksucker [TS]

01:02:54   coming in or not even a cocksucker [TS]

01:02:56   because you know what he might change [TS]

01:02:57   one of the entries he made that may take [TS]

01:02:58   off the mouth he may decide that every [TS]

01:03:00   doll can only have one hole that nothing [TS]

01:03:02   would fit in right he might want to 59 [TS]

01:03:04   reissue what if you could only buy let's [TS]

01:03:07   see who would it be 1959 what if you can [TS]

01:03:09   only buy like Ethel Mertz what if you [TS]

01:03:11   get only by and Ethel Mertz steps uh sex [TS]

01:03:14   doll the neighbor from I Love Lucy you [TS]

01:03:16   headed by that I think I would do what i [TS]

01:03:17   have done with beginning guitar which is [TS]

01:03:19   not order one you get a horse [TS]

01:03:21   oh my goodness term it gives her I'm [TS]

01:03:24   sorry Merlin I just called the Gibson [TS]

01:03:25   that's actually it's actually my [TS]

01:03:27   mother's dogs it didn't get it because [TS]

01:03:29   it is getting still is getting stillroom [TS]

01:03:31   it's still around like 12 years old my [TS]

01:03:33   love Gibson but if you go up to the top [TS]

01:03:35   this is now it's getting terrible time [TS]

01:03:36   we are operating top of the the real [TS]

01:03:39   doll screen you can buy torsos no no [TS]

01:03:47   ourselves with no limbs and and just [TS]

01:03:50   what just below the point of entry extra [TS]

01:03:54   faces on the straight stuff it's paul [TS]

01:03:59   now see now [TS]

01:04:01   always smiling I'm see now all my gosh [TS]

01:04:05   the polishes off the fingernail if you [TS]

01:04:08   can buy extra fucking torsos and faces [TS]

01:04:09   he first they are you gonna blow through [TS]

01:04:11   those you know you're gonna tear it up [TS]

01:04:13   that bad [TS]

01:04:14   now you can get them where they're [TS]

01:04:16   smiling so they don't look like stupid [TS]

01:04:18   angelina jolie like like a like share [TS]

01:04:21   face but they're like smiley faces you [TS]

01:04:24   mean that was it was previously for sex [TS]

01:04:26   space they got the second phase there ya [TS]

01:04:28   are the most of them have the sex face [TS]

01:04:29   like yeah but but a but then you get [TS]

01:04:34   them smiling and then there's you can [TS]

01:04:35   get there with their eyes closed so [TS]

01:04:37   they're not judging you [TS]

01:04:39   they're not watching you but they're [TS]

01:04:41   judgy eyes staring staring staring i [TS]

01:04:45   want i want one place i thought was like [TS]

01:04:48   someplace better by now i want to set [TS]

01:04:50   always oh no here's the sad thing that [TS]

01:04:52   the smiley faces do not have an oral [TS]

01:04:54   opening have to tune [TS]

01:04:59   ya dumb fuck face [TS]

01:05:02   oh yeah i can get those didn't have a [TS]

01:05:04   bolt detachable irony you're gonna want [TS]

01:05:07   a smiley face but then you can't what [TS]

01:05:09   can you do with the smiley face you all [TS]

01:05:10   you can do is appreciated [TS]

01:05:11   okay we gotta get going but I getting [TS]

01:05:13   one thing that you know you can buy [TS]

01:05:14   these used that's a lie and you can buy [TS]

01:05:17   pre-owned they have pre-owned I've read [TS]

01:05:19   about this you can buy pre-owned know [TS]

01:05:20   who were you I guess that's something I [TS]

01:05:22   guess steam cleaning [TS]

01:05:23   I don't know I think you probably clean [TS]

01:05:26   these girls so they could get a horse [TS]

01:05:27   like this would you get it smiling [TS]

01:05:31   uh-huh had propagated alpha to get the [TS]

01:05:35   smiley horseface then where would you [TS]

01:05:36   get the you get the sex or space that [TS]

01:05:48   rubber girl [TS]