Roderick on the Line

00:00:00 ◼   ► hello John how are you hi Merlin e man [TS]

00:00:15 ◼   ► John ah you just sent me a picture of a [TS]

00:00:20 ◼   ► chili dog and I'm at once envious and [TS]

00:00:22 ◼   ► disgusted should be on my end I said [TS]

00:00:26 ◼   ► that to you you two minutes ago and its [TS]

00:00:29 ◼   ► menu [TS]

00:00:32 ◼   ► yeah it's all gone i think the first [TS]

00:00:34 ◼   ► rule of chili dog is that you should not [TS]

00:00:38 ◼   ► eat in two minutes [TS]

00:00:40 ◼   ► item i think the first rule of choice [TS]

00:00:44 ◼   ► August that you should you should eat it [TS]

00:00:45 ◼   ► as fast as you can from the driver's [TS]

00:00:49 ◼   ► seat of a moving volkswagen bus a lot of [TS]

00:00:53 ◼   ► fumes in a bus going across the george [TS]

00:00:56 ◼   ► washington bridge that is the that's the [TS]

00:00:58 ◼   ► first rule of chili bone i like to hear [TS]

00:01:01 ◼   ► more about that story you yes you so [TS]

00:01:04 ◼   ► much so much to share Jon in semi [TS]

00:01:06 ◼   ► stories and I worry i do what i can but [TS]

00:01:09 ◼   ► I still I still worry that there are so [TS]

00:01:11 ◼   ► many threads that could become what I [TS]

00:01:13 ◼   ► guess some kind of a tapestry yeah i [TS]

00:01:15 ◼   ► know a tapestry still on the first [TS]

00:01:17 ◼   ► square some kind of very special quilt [TS]

00:01:19 ◼   ► it's a tapestry that is safety pin to [TS]

00:01:22 ◼   ► the ceiling of my dorm room so that the [TS]

00:01:25 ◼   ► harsh light the harsh dorm room light is [TS]

00:01:28 ◼   ► turned into a beautiful mosaic of colors [TS]

00:01:32 ◼   ► there any patchouli no God no I and I [TS]

00:01:36 ◼   ► and Counting patchouli the other day [TS]

00:01:38 ◼   ► there might be patchouli on the pillow [TS]

00:01:40 ◼   ► from a from a visitor from guess who [TS]

00:01:43 ◼   ► but there's no native patchouli you sit [TS]

00:01:48 ◼   ► around listen to that indigo girls I [TS]

00:01:51 ◼   ► think some patchouli must have but let's [TS]

00:01:54 ◼   ► be honest first of all you don't even [TS]

00:01:55 ◼   ► have to be in the same room as someone [TS]

00:01:57 ◼   ► with the truly [TS]

00:01:58 ◼   ► I'm sure it goes through brick like [TS]

00:02:00 ◼   ► those cable shows about finding ghosts [TS]

00:02:02 ◼   ► now precisely i mean it could've been [TS]

00:02:03 ◼   ► there years ago right there let me just [TS]

00:02:06 ◼   ► let me just say that listening to the [TS]

00:02:07 ◼   ► Indigo Girls does not like patchouli [TS]

00:02:09 ◼   ► doesn't pour through the speakers you [TS]

00:02:12 ◼   ► have to someone with patchouli on has to [TS]

00:02:14 ◼   ► be in the vicinity food I like I know [TS]

00:02:17 ◼   ► this for a fact because I listened to [TS]

00:02:18 ◼   ► the Indigo Girls and diet i'm getting [TS]

00:02:21 ◼   ► patchouli on me I think you better get [TS]

00:02:23 ◼   ► it pours itself out in its own time in a [TS]

00:02:25 ◼   ► very empowered way [TS]

00:02:26 ◼   ► mhm I this is this is definitely one of [TS]

00:02:29 ◼   ► those things i think in a weird way that [TS]

00:02:31 ◼   ► would make neither side happy about it [TS]

00:02:33 ◼   ► is a lot like axe or roughly as polo Axe [TS]

00:02:36 ◼   ► body spray Axe body spray and because I [TS]

00:02:38 ◼   ► I think you become you come in nerd he [TS]

00:02:41 ◼   ► stopped in so i said that right [TS]

00:02:43 ◼   ► interested nerd is a newer how do you [TS]

00:02:46 ◼   ► say oh I newer damn right you in kc quit [TS]

00:02:49 ◼   ► notice how much you think you know and [TS]

00:02:52 ◼   ► I've seen this with old ladies in [TS]

00:02:53 ◼   ► performance lets perfume upon the white [TS]

00:02:55 ◼   ► shoulders of whatever and you put too [TS]

00:02:56 ◼   ► much on you don't know it it could be it [TS]

00:02:59 ◼   ► could become clients obsession I'm [TS]

00:03:00 ◼   ► telling you once you get into a personal [TS]

00:03:02 ◼   ► sent you gotta know when to stop and you [TS]

00:03:04 ◼   ► probably can't which is precisely why i [TS]

00:03:06 ◼   ► have never worn any kind of scented [TS]

00:03:09 ◼   ► product i were no scented products of [TS]

00:03:13 ◼   ► any kind setting aside the military [TS]

00:03:15 ◼   ► implications well exactly first of all [TS]

00:03:17 ◼   ► you don't want the Viacom to pick you [TS]

00:03:19 ◼   ► out of the jungle but second of all you [TS]

00:03:22 ◼   ► don't want to be walking around with the [TS]

00:03:24 ◼   ► with brute 45 or whatever on and and [TS]

00:03:29 ◼   ► it's coming off you and in giant waves [TS]

00:03:31 ◼   ► like like like on a highway in the [TS]

00:03:33 ◼   ► desert you know giant waves of stinky [TS]

00:03:37 ◼   ► cologne but also I learned very early on [TS]

00:03:41 ◼   ► that I was extremely sensitive to the [TS]

00:03:44 ◼   ► sense that women wore and if if if a [TS]

00:03:48 ◼   ► woman was wearing a at perfume or in a [TS]

00:03:51 ◼   ► lot of cases like a natural oil [TS]

00:03:53 ◼   ► what are those called an essential oil [TS]

00:03:55 ◼   ► who it was it was like I became not [TS]

00:04:02 ◼   ► sexually around food but not all the [TS]

00:04:05 ◼   ► none of those known as worked on you [TS]

00:04:07 ◼   ► beautiful girl will not none of them but [TS]

00:04:09 ◼   ► I don't worry about what about like a [TS]

00:04:10 ◼   ► ribeye [TS]

00:04:11 ◼   ► smell ya rabbi mm I mean you know we're [TS]

00:04:14 ◼   ► going the right way and the right place [TS]

00:04:16 ◼   ► it could i watch her eating a rib eye in [TS]

00:04:20 ◼   ► that case yes it that would conquer [TS]

00:04:21 ◼   ► almost all like sandalwood sighs just [TS]

00:04:24 ◼   ► just became very very sexy woman eating [TS]

00:04:26 ◼   ► a stick i love a woman who can really [TS]

00:04:28 ◼   ► dig into a steak but if I was nuzzling [TS]

00:04:29 ◼   ► her and all of a sudden I caught a whiff [TS]

00:04:31 ◼   ► of ribbon no I don't think that like [TS]

00:04:33 ◼   ► sauteed mushrooms [TS]

00:04:34 ◼   ► it's funny how you mix those things out [TS]

00:04:36 ◼   ► of context and caught a paraphilia [TS]

00:04:38 ◼   ► center of sautéed mushrooms will get me [TS]

00:04:41 ◼   ► through many many long nights was on [TS]

00:04:43 ◼   ► side one of your first record i agree on [TS]

00:04:47 ◼   ► all of these and I I've been I've been [TS]

00:04:49 ◼   ► guilty of this I've been guilty of that [TS]

00:04:51 ◼   ► i will say of wearing an essential oil [TS]

00:04:54 ◼   ► and turning out with boyfriend don't [TS]

00:04:56 ◼   ► really smell like a steak I've done that [TS]

00:04:57 ◼   ► I think we've holics without dabbled in [TS]

00:04:59 ◼   ► the early nineties we were all dabbling [TS]

00:05:01 ◼   ► with yes truly were dabbling yeah I had [TS]

00:05:03 ◼   ► a very uncomfortable conversation one [TS]

00:05:05 ◼   ► time with a girl that I was extremely [TS]

00:05:06 ◼   ► attracted to their and we ended up [TS]

00:05:09 ◼   ► dating for a long time but I had to say [TS]

00:05:11 ◼   ► stop wearing that smell [TS]

00:05:15 ◼   ► and you know that's a tough that's a [TS]

00:05:18 ◼   ► tough conversation without over [TS]

00:05:20 ◼   ► identifying here I mean you can you give [TS]

00:05:21 ◼   ► me a sense it was a day toilet water [TS]

00:05:23 ◼   ► smell or was it de la that's water [TS]

00:05:26 ◼   ► that's what they call you called toilet [TS]

00:05:27 ◼   ► water which seems like a weird branding [TS]

00:05:29 ◼   ► decision but up all kinds of water that [TS]

00:05:31 ◼   ► you could call that was from the French [TS]

00:05:33 ◼   ► 12 laps [TS]

00:05:35 ◼   ► yeah but in any case no she was a she [TS]

00:05:38 ◼   ► was kind of an earthy girl and she had [TS]

00:05:41 ◼   ► chosen she had made the mistake has [TS]

00:05:44 ◼   ► never been an actual compliment to cost [TS]

00:05:46 ◼   ► them an earthy that's like that's like [TS]

00:05:48 ◼   ► calling a woman handsome [TS]

00:05:49 ◼   ► it depends their girls who would take it [TS]

00:05:52 ◼   ► as a compliment but she was she actually [TS]

00:05:54 ◼   ► was an earthy girl and she chose [TS]

00:05:56 ◼   ► actually with gia gala think mistake [TS]

00:05:59 ◼   ► which is little bit of her she was a you [TS]

00:06:02 ◼   ► know she was a sporty girl let's say [TS]

00:06:03 ◼   ► that she was oh shit shit a big but [TS]

00:06:06 ◼   ► eventually was a lesbian though you know [TS]

00:06:08 ◼   ► no no big butt and no lesbian know he [TS]

00:06:10 ◼   ► was like that you know swimmer dancer [TS]

00:06:12 ◼   ► sporting hmm um but but earthy like she [TS]

00:06:16 ◼   ► she did not let's say she did not shy [TS]

00:06:19 ◼   ► away from perspiration she's not [TS]

00:06:22 ◼   ► somebody who was who [TS]

00:06:23 ◼   ► afraid to perspire and she made the [TS]

00:06:26 ◼   ► category error I think of our choosing [TS]

00:06:28 ◼   ► for herself an earthy scent you know [TS]

00:06:32 ◼   ► like a dark musky scent and i said i [TS]

00:06:36 ◼   ► think really because you are already [TS]

00:06:38 ◼   ► such a musky the dark musky girl you [TS]

00:06:43 ◼   ► should choose a light scent like [TS]

00:06:45 ◼   ► lavender or Primrose you know something [TS]

00:06:50 ◼   ► flowery mhm and this little bit little [TS]

00:06:53 ◼   ► bit matching matchi you know it's like [TS]

00:06:55 ◼   ► when you're again I'm denim jacket with [TS]

00:06:57 ◼   ► the denim pants it's a little matching [TS]

00:06:58 ◼   ► matching yeah you don't want to pick up [TS]

00:07:00 ◼   ► a Carhartt jacket and smell campfire on [TS]

00:07:02 ◼   ► it that's the carhartt jackets [TS]

00:07:04 ◼   ► automatically gonna smell like campfire [TS]

00:07:06 ◼   ► who you want to pick up a Carhartt [TS]

00:07:07 ◼   ► jacket and you know and smell the lobby [TS]

00:07:10 ◼   ► of the ritz-carlton hotel or lat 44 lady [TS]

00:07:13 ◼   ► steak [TS]

00:07:14 ◼   ► well now now here now you're coining a [TS]

00:07:18 ◼   ► smell that I don't want to smell lady [TS]

00:07:20 ◼   ► steak but anyway she was revisited [TS]

00:07:24 ◼   ► amazing perfect i'm sorry jump that's a [TS]

00:07:27 ◼   ► perfect example you like ladies and you [TS]

00:07:29 ◼   ► like steak doing it right when your [TS]

00:07:31 ◼   ► portmanteau those together [TS]

00:07:33 ◼   ► oh that that's what I just meet you [TS]

00:07:35 ◼   ► don't want to cut she was receptive to [TS]

00:07:37 ◼   ► my to my constructive criticism and and [TS]

00:07:40 ◼   ► she changed her scent and then we were [TS]

00:07:42 ◼   ► off to the races that is extended to [TS]

00:07:44 ◼   ► tell you that is extremely earthy for [TS]

00:07:45 ◼   ► her to write that note I know what [TS]

00:07:47 ◼   ► you're taking out like that if somebody [TS]

00:07:48 ◼   ► said to you I would absolutely if [TS]

00:07:50 ◼   ► someone if someone p it was caringly [TS]

00:07:52 ◼   ► said like your scent is a wonderful part [TS]

00:07:57 ◼   ► of you but the part that you are [TS]

00:07:59 ◼   ► spraying on after-the-fact who I think [TS]

00:08:03 ◼   ► you could modify I would take that I [TS]

00:08:05 ◼   ► would take that criticism my own or they [TS]

00:08:07 ◼   ► texted it to you [TS]

00:08:08 ◼   ► mm-hmm see what small the final all caps [TS]

00:08:13 ◼   ► all i know is i try to text you as [TS]

00:08:14 ◼   ► little as possible [TS]

00:08:16 ◼   ► it's like super nasty thing I come up [TS]

00:08:18 ◼   ► very important money on the counter i [TS]

00:08:19 ◼   ► try to be very even with you I try to [TS]

00:08:21 ◼   ► think about what time of day is whether [TS]

00:08:22 ◼   ► you slept with you've eaten and I try [TS]

00:08:24 ◼   ► not because you're you're you know [TS]

00:08:26 ◼   ► delicate but just because I don't want [TS]

00:08:27 ◼   ► to be one of those people that the [TS]

00:08:28 ◼   ► causes problems in text to you and I [TS]

00:08:30 ◼   ► just think that somebody sitting you [TS]

00:08:31 ◼   ► know John you're very earthy maybe a [TS]

00:08:32 ◼   ► little too earthy uh-huh [TS]

00:08:34 ◼   ► they might get a mi get a flaming text [TS]

00:08:36 ◼   ► back [TS]

00:08:37 ◼   ► I'll say what I think it is I think it's [TS]

00:08:38 ◼   ► an act of violence I'm gonna go there [TS]

00:08:39 ◼   ► I'm gonna be totally bury I think the [TS]

00:08:41 ◼   ► violence i think what well here's the [TS]

00:08:43 ◼   ► thing i don't want someone center to [TS]

00:08:45 ◼   ► send them an angry text let's circle [TS]

00:08:47 ◼   ► back to that alright I like I am so much [TS]

00:08:51 ◼   ► of the time I am realizing how often I'm [TS]

00:08:52 ◼   ► at walgreens and I think I might need to [TS]

00:08:54 ◼   ► get a get into some kind of program [TS]

00:08:55 ◼   ► while walgreens is right across the [TS]

00:08:57 ◼   ► street from me right across the streets [TS]

00:08:59 ◼   ► well it's close to our house thinking [TS]

00:09:00 ◼   ► it's very close very close to our house [TS]

00:09:02 ◼   ► that's where i bought my cape [TS]

00:09:04 ◼   ► John could talk about the Cape sometimes [TS]

00:09:06 ◼   ► I write that down a little special time [TS]

00:09:08 ◼   ► that was for us it was for me too [TS]

00:09:10 ◼   ► oh my god that was a special time [TS]

00:09:11 ◼   ► because you okay all right you know what [TS]

00:09:14 ◼   ► writing that twice on a card cape and [TS]

00:09:15 ◼   ► keep I understand why you go to [TS]

00:09:17 ◼   ► walgreens it's your neighbourhood it's [TS]

00:09:19 ◼   ► your local ok but here's the thing about [TS]

00:09:21 ◼   ► walk okay first of all about you like [TS]

00:09:25 ◼   ► pens and they have lots of pens they [TS]

00:09:27 ◼   ► have an ok selection ok let's get this [TS]

00:09:29 ◼   ► out of the way we have the empirically [TS]

00:09:33 ◼   ► categorically shittiest walgreens I've [TS]

00:09:35 ◼   ► ever been in my life I've been in a fuck [TS]

00:09:37 ◼   ► ton of walgreens and ours is easily the [TS]

00:09:39 ◼   ► worst and i'll tell you why you've also [TS]

00:09:41 ◼   ► been to our safeway the safe where you [TS]

00:09:42 ◼   ► parked on the roof the creepy safeway by [TS]

00:09:44 ◼   ► our house after which is which is as far [TS]

00:09:46 ◼   ► as I know there is there's one safeway [TS]

00:09:48 ◼   ► in walnut creek that not the nice safe [TS]

00:09:51 ◼   ► way but the old safeway that might be [TS]

00:09:52 ◼   ► creepier [TS]

00:09:53 ◼   ► it's a little bit Haunted Mansion like [TS]

00:09:55 ◼   ► they turn off the lights and stuff but [TS]

00:09:56 ◼   ► ours [TS]

00:09:57 ◼   ► my mom said just the other day started [TS]

00:09:59 ◼   ► around now no she said four times in her [TS]

00:10:02 ◼   ► life her entire life has she been in to [TS]

00:10:05 ◼   ► a supermarket that smelled like rotting [TS]

00:10:08 ◼   ► meat and all four times it was a safe [TS]

00:10:11 ◼   ► way that she says I won't buy meat at a [TS]

00:10:14 ◼   ► safeway because it if you can't keep the [TS]

00:10:17 ◼   ► smell of rotting meat out of your [TS]

00:10:18 ◼   ► supermarket all right flattered and [TS]

00:10:20 ◼   ► you're doing something really with you [TS]

00:10:21 ◼   ► ever bought seafood I know you haven't [TS]

00:10:23 ◼   ► because your rear regular theme as you [TS]

00:10:25 ◼   ► have about seafood a lucky haha IKR but [TS]

00:10:29 ◼   ► since you're worried about seafood there [TS]

00:10:31 ◼   ► does it come in like an almond roca can [TS]

00:10:34 ◼   ► try to lay lucky lucky is like easy a [TS]

00:10:38 ◼   ► person's markets yeah [TS]

00:10:39 ◼   ► no photo seafood there oh yeah actually [TS]

00:10:42 ◼   ► I name-checking built to spill songs [TS]

00:10:44 ◼   ► memory serves albertsons a thought in [TS]

00:10:47 ◼   ► albertson stir-fry dinner can make it [TS]

00:10:49 ◼   ► down there I'm not [TS]

00:10:49 ◼   ► with their work but it didn't it didn't [TS]

00:10:52 ◼   ► make his apartment like an apartment [TS]

00:10:53 ◼   ► what about got two phones i had a pretty [TS]

00:10:55 ◼   ► song is pretty song hand and I'm not a [TS]

00:10:58 ◼   ► very pretty town huh [TS]

00:11:00 ◼   ► I think it's a beautiful song so many [TS]

00:11:03 ◼   ► people try to capture that feeling of [TS]

00:11:04 ◼   ► being a kid and being confused about [TS]

00:11:05 ◼   ► love and things and usually comes out [TS]

00:11:07 ◼   ► really stupid but that was that's [TS]

00:11:08 ◼   ► gorgeous [TS]

00:11:09 ◼   ► it's ok so let's go back to the metal [TS]

00:11:11 ◼   ► walgreens and you were saying that [TS]

00:11:13 ◼   ► there's a super the associated anyway [TS]

00:11:15 ◼   ► you know what let's skip it is really [TS]

00:11:16 ◼   ► boring let's come back to the cape but I [TS]

00:11:17 ◼   ► was walking through walgreens I was not [TS]

00:11:19 ◼   ► getting prescription i think i was [TS]

00:11:20 ◼   ► buying was therefore i think that i had [TS]

00:11:23 ◼   ► to buy some bathroom tissue as they call [TS]

00:11:24 ◼   ► it in France don't let me ask you a [TS]

00:11:26 ◼   ► question yes please go ahead i just got [TS]

00:11:28 ◼   ► into an argument with a friend love [TS]

00:11:29 ◼   ► about this [TS]

00:11:30 ◼   ► yeah we're really can't believe that k [TS]

00:11:33 ◼   ► he's a he's a successful man a wealthy [TS]

00:11:36 ◼   ► person and i was def mckagan that wasn't [TS]

00:11:39 ◼   ► done i was using his restroom and what [TS]

00:11:44 ◼   ► do you think I discovered he's over the [TS]

00:11:46 ◼   ► bad guy [TS]

00:11:47 ◼   ► no he is that he is a squat toilet [TS]

00:11:50 ◼   ► tissue buyer you [TS]

00:11:52 ◼   ► we've had this conversation heavenly yes [TS]

00:11:54 ◼   ► we have I think we've had the Scott [TS]

00:11:55 ◼   ► tissue conversation on a number of [TS]

00:11:57 ◼   ► occasions and it's you get mad about a [TS]

00:12:00 ◼   ► lot of stuff eventually but i don't [TS]

00:12:01 ◼   ► think i've seen many things where you [TS]

00:12:02 ◼   ► get mad faster [TS]

00:12:04 ◼   ► no I came out of that bathroom shaking [TS]

00:12:06 ◼   ► with those paper in his face and I said [TS]

00:12:08 ◼   ► you're fucking millionaire by some [TS]

00:12:11 ◼   ► goddamn two-ply toilet paper this this [TS]

00:12:14 ◼   ► is this is a crime your committee [TS]

00:12:16 ◼   ► against yourself and your family [TS]

00:12:17 ◼   ► I don't know I don't know our audience [TS]

00:12:19 ◼   ► John but I'm gonna have to assume that [TS]

00:12:20 ◼   ► there are some people out there believe [TS]

00:12:22 ◼   ► it or not there are some people out [TS]

00:12:23 ◼   ► there that may not know about the [TS]

00:12:25 ◼   ► literal human Holocaust that's got [TS]

00:12:27 ◼   ► toilet paper represents could you [TS]

00:12:28 ◼   ► briefly give people an idea what the [TS]

00:12:30 ◼   ► problem is with Scott toilet paper [TS]

00:12:31 ◼   ► sculpture paper is like is like waxed [TS]

00:12:34 ◼   ► paper it's like butcher paper it is they [TS]

00:12:38 ◼   ► fool you into thinking you if you are [TS]

00:12:40 ◼   ► comparison shopper you're going through [TS]

00:12:42 ◼   ► the aisles and you're looking at the [TS]

00:12:43 ◼   ► different toilet papers and you say oh I [TS]

00:12:45 ◼   ► get a thousand sheets or I get 10,000 [TS]

00:12:48 ◼   ► sheets such a big role and it looks so [TS]

00:12:50 ◼   ► firm massive roll of toilet paper so [TS]

00:12:52 ◼   ► many sheets so many square foot it's [TS]

00:12:54 ◼   ► just a cute it's like it's like a nikka [TS]

00:12:56 ◼   ► rato well-made Nicaragua cigar like [TS]

00:12:58 ◼   ► there's no soft spots there's no hearts [TS]

00:12:59 ◼   ► but it looks you hold [TS]

00:13:00 ◼   ► in your hand and you go this is a solid [TS]

00:13:02 ◼   ► fucking chunk of toilet paper [TS]

00:13:04 ◼   ► I'm not going to get dicked over with [TS]

00:13:05 ◼   ► all that fruity stuff forget the super [TS]

00:13:06 ◼   ► big tube in the middle it feels right on [TS]

00:13:08 ◼   ► the face of it on the butt of it it [TS]

00:13:10 ◼   ► seems like this is gonna be the perfect [TS]

00:13:11 ◼   ► toilet paper [TS]

00:13:12 ◼   ► yeah you could knock somebody out with [TS]

00:13:14 ◼   ► that roll of toilet paper super solid [TS]

00:13:15 ◼   ► and it's half the price of the other [TS]

00:13:17 ◼   ► toilet paper so you think I am a great [TS]

00:13:20 ◼   ► shopper i am a smart person and let's be [TS]

00:13:23 ◼   ► honest I was just a little it is just [TS]

00:13:25 ◼   ► toilet paper right well what I mean how [TS]

00:13:28 ◼   ► good or bad the toilet paper be given [TS]

00:13:31 ◼   ► right what I'm gonna do with it right [TS]

00:13:32 ◼   ► I'm not an idiot you're eating yourself [TS]

00:13:34 ◼   ► if you don't have to it doesn't have to [TS]

00:13:36 ◼   ► be printed with a colorful pattern at [TS]

00:13:38 ◼   ► any just toilet paper right but then you [TS]

00:13:40 ◼   ► get home and you realize that it is it [TS]

00:13:44 ◼   ► has the it is as extent as tissue paper [TS]

00:13:47 ◼   ► it is as soft as notebook paper like [TS]

00:13:51 ◼   ► filler paper like a look Taylor paper [TS]

00:13:53 ◼   ► yeah if it's like a jet pilot for and [TS]

00:13:58 ◼   ► you because it is so uncomfortable and [TS]

00:14:01 ◼   ► so flimsy you end up using seven times [TS]

00:14:04 ◼   ► more toilet paper than you would uh and [TS]

00:14:06 ◼   ► i think it's it's so poorly constructive [TS]

00:14:08 ◼   ► role wise sheet that if you do i'm not [TS]

00:14:10 ◼   ► one of these people i think i don't know [TS]

00:14:12 ◼   ► if you want to feel we are you a little [TS]

00:14:14 ◼   ► kind of guy are you a rapper rapper rap [TS]

00:14:16 ◼   ► guy okay actually I'm a fold fold I me [TS]

00:14:19 ◼   ► to meet you but if you were a little [TS]

00:14:21 ◼   ► kind of guy [TS]

00:14:22 ◼   ► it would fall apart four times it's like [TS]

00:14:23 ◼   ► using it's like a public restroom in a [TS]

00:14:25 ◼   ► park [TS]

00:14:25 ◼   ► yeah right it's exactly that's public [TS]

00:14:27 ◼   ► restroom toilet paper in a party what is [TS]

00:14:29 ◼   ► John I think I'm entitled remember my [TS]

00:14:31 ◼   ► old remember that got me back on that [TS]

00:14:33 ◼   ► Scott and fuck me up when we were first [TS]

00:14:34 ◼   ► friends I think it's because i was an RA [TS]

00:14:36 ◼   ► in college and I think Scott is what I [TS]

00:14:38 ◼   ► gave away to those poor bastards haha [TS]

00:14:39 ◼   ► public knowledge public college Scott [TS]

00:14:41 ◼   ► toilet paper [TS]

00:14:42 ◼   ► well so anyway my millionaire friend [TS]

00:14:44 ◼   ► starts giving me some pushback on it [TS]

00:14:46 ◼   ► like I've always used Scott there's [TS]

00:14:48 ◼   ► nothing wrong with it and I'm like you [TS]

00:14:51 ◼   ► that you have no idea your children are [TS]

00:14:53 ◼   ► growing up in a hot and toilet paper [TS]

00:14:55 ◼   ► Holocaust they're gonna go to other kids [TS]

00:14:57 ◼   ► houses and drives they might as well [TS]

00:15:00 ◼   ► have literally mission on their face [TS]

00:15:01 ◼   ► they're gonna walk in there and they [TS]

00:15:02 ◼   ► have no idea this was not knowing how to [TS]

00:15:04 ◼   ► eat with a fork [TS]

00:15:04 ◼   ► I'm not going there and go what is this [TS]

00:15:06 ◼   ► what is this magical thing that you put [TS]

00:15:07 ◼   ► into the special room [TS]

00:15:09 ◼   ► yeah all my friends are flying on a [TS]

00:15:12 ◼   ► magic carpet of soft toilet paper [TS]

00:15:14 ◼   ► / and we are riding on a unlike a on a [TS]

00:15:17 ◼   ► birch two-by-four it's a while even [TS]

00:15:21 ◼   ► worse than them going to their friend's [TS]

00:15:22 ◼   ► house when their teenage friends come to [TS]

00:15:24 ◼   ► their house a home [TS]

00:15:26 ◼   ► don't know whether it's out on the [TS]

00:15:27 ◼   ► street ho that's like drunk down on the [TS]

00:15:29 ◼   ► couch rose [TS]

00:15:31 ◼   ► well I still struggle with this and [TS]

00:15:33 ◼   ► first of all if I may say thank you very [TS]

00:15:34 ◼   ► much for correcting that you're like so [TS]

00:15:36 ◼   ► many things we've come stay at my house [TS]

00:15:37 ◼   ► for a long time for free now you really [TS]

00:15:39 ◼   ► helped me with that and my family we [TS]

00:15:41 ◼   ► don't get anymore but can I just say [TS]

00:15:42 ◼   ► that whether it is again the paper [TS]

00:15:45 ◼   ► products that my uncle helped pioneer [TS]

00:15:47 ◼   ► the weather is the paper towels whether [TS]

00:15:49 ◼   ► it is the toilet paper you've noticed [TS]

00:15:50 ◼   ► I'm sure over that over time that [TS]

00:15:53 ◼   ► they've been trying to find new ways for [TS]

00:15:54 ◼   ► you to use paper for things and I don't [TS]

00:15:56 ◼   ► want this in turn into a morning zoo or [TS]

00:15:58 ◼   ► a stand-up comedy thing but I'm just [TS]

00:15:59 ◼   ► saying there's no you got all the wipes [TS]

00:16:01 ◼   ► now right everything's wipe everything [TS]

00:16:03 ◼   ► we have the new ways to have cheap paper [TS]

00:16:05 ◼   ► that you buy maybe it's got some kind of [TS]

00:16:07 ◼   ► brandon johnson & johnson product on it [TS]

00:16:09 ◼   ► I'm telling you my family to this day [TS]

00:16:10 ◼   ► struggles with which is the right toilet [TS]

00:16:12 ◼   ► paper when I was in that walgreens with [TS]

00:16:13 ◼   ► the stinking patchouli later we should [TS]

00:16:14 ◼   ► come back to I stood there and I looked [TS]

00:16:16 ◼   ► at the embarrassment of riches before me [TS]

00:16:19 ◼   ► I still had no idea how Tyler paper [TS]

00:16:21 ◼   ► well I judged by all of the heuristics [TS]

00:16:23 ◼   ► that I know right so so let me just say [TS]

00:16:26 ◼   ► I've done some research on Amazon [TS]

00:16:28 ◼   ► because you know you can subscribe the [TS]

00:16:29 ◼   ► toilet paper which I've done before [TS]

00:16:31 ◼   ► there are several metrics well there's [TS]

00:16:33 ◼   ► cheap toilet paper which is in its own [TS]

00:16:34 ◼   ► class but then the mid-range toilet [TS]

00:16:36 ◼   ► paper mid-to-high right this is in your [TS]

00:16:38 ◼   ► honda accord of toilet paper you can [TS]

00:16:40 ◼   ► have you can have us soft I you can have [TS]

00:16:45 ◼   ► durable that there is adorable metric [TS]

00:16:48 ◼   ► horrible you can call it tough I look it [TS]

00:16:52 ◼   ► up [TS]

00:16:52 ◼   ► durable so that like it travels well [TS]

00:16:54 ◼   ► like oh you mean like if you want to [TS]

00:16:56 ◼   ► like somebody's house ahead Scott know [TS]

00:16:59 ◼   ► it like a daddy [TS]

00:17:01 ◼   ► nothing that you would carry a a roll [TS]

00:17:03 ◼   ► around with you although i do but uh but [TS]

00:17:06 ◼   ► no I'm i think you know i think you know [TS]

00:17:07 ◼   ► exactly what i mean i think i think if [TS]

00:17:09 ◼   ► you if you're having a tough time and [TS]

00:17:11 ◼   ► you really had to go to town you were [TS]

00:17:12 ◼   ► drinking enough water and I think it's [TS]

00:17:13 ◼   ► gonna it's gonna blow its gonna blow up [TS]

00:17:15 ◼   ► in your hand like a German grenade like [TS]

00:17:17 ◼   ► a potato masher they called it a potato [TS]

00:17:19 ◼   ► masher that they'd call it that [TS]

00:17:20 ◼   ► so I we still struggle with this now [TS]

00:17:23 ◼   ► here's the profit is this like the IKEA [TS]

00:17:24 ◼   ► pillow selecting [TS]

00:17:26 ◼   ► like God make sure cam that's dr. it was [TS]

00:17:29 ◼   ► going you think I'm I'm a back sleeper [TS]

00:17:32 ◼   ► but I likely airy breeze that nobody's [TS]

00:17:35 ◼   ► jumping at the should just forget the [TS]

00:17:37 ◼   ► clear again [TS]

00:17:38 ◼   ► well I didn't you well know i didn't get [TS]

00:17:40 ◼   ► the clerk you got one Swedish once i [TS]

00:17:42 ◼   ► sleep on one of those funky phone once [TS]

00:17:44 ◼   ► TWP no no III by my pillows are at at [TS]

00:17:48 ◼   ► Ross Dress for Less I don't know why [TS]

00:17:56 ◼   ► that's something i think i've got is [TS]

00:17:58 ◼   ► like we're poor people buy panties and [TS]

00:18:00 ◼   ► and fake lladros and I i do you make a [TS]

00:18:03 ◼   ► special special trip there or yeah I [TS]

00:18:05 ◼   ► don't even know what a big lladro is but [TS]

00:18:08 ◼   ► no they have a they have a selection of [TS]

00:18:11 ◼   ► bomb of linens and pillows that's that's [TS]

00:18:15 ◼   ► very inexpensive you know living [TS]

00:18:17 ◼   ► expenses he trying out while you're [TS]

00:18:18 ◼   ► there [TS]

00:18:19 ◼   ► I I stick a finger elated because I [TS]

00:18:22 ◼   ► putting stroke it sure okay [TS]

00:18:24 ◼   ► mhm do let me just put it differently [TS]

00:18:26 ◼   ► certainly try it out like you know and I [TS]

00:18:29 ◼   ► definitely come back to mattresses [TS]

00:18:30 ◼   ► because boys that ever racket the [TS]

00:18:32 ◼   ► mattress thing but the pillow thing do [TS]

00:18:33 ◼   ► you just kind of hold it in your hand [TS]

00:18:35 ◼   ► like a normal adult or to you do you [TS]

00:18:37 ◼   ► smashed against your head off the HD [TS]

00:18:39 ◼   ► don't you know you're not supplying in [TS]

00:18:40 ◼   ► any point [TS]

00:18:41 ◼   ► no I don't laid out in the in the roster [TS]

00:18:44 ◼   ► for Ross and and and snuggle my pillow [TS]

00:18:47 ◼   ► but i have a sense of of the kind of [TS]

00:18:49 ◼   ► pillow i can actually I made a mistake [TS]

00:18:51 ◼   ► this last time I bought pillows that [TS]

00:18:53 ◼   ► were too firm and now seems like such a [TS]

00:18:56 ◼   ► good idea [TS]

00:18:57 ◼   ► yeah I'm trying to break them in every [TS]

00:18:58 ◼   ► time I walk past my kick him and punch [TS]

00:19:00 ◼   ► him a bunch of times [TS]

00:19:01 ◼   ► uh that's what I I you know this is like [TS]

00:19:04 ◼   ► the crest and colgate thing for me where [TS]

00:19:05 ◼   ► I didn't think he used to matter and now [TS]

00:19:07 ◼   ► it matters and in and hotels boy I [TS]

00:19:10 ◼   ► really noticed you go in there and get [TS]

00:19:12 ◼   ► in there and naughty travel but you go [TS]

00:19:14 ◼   ► in places anything goes something like [TS]

00:19:15 ◼   ► cool like a marriott on marriott man you [TS]

00:19:17 ◼   ► go in and fucking 12 pillows on the the [TS]

00:19:20 ◼   ► bed [TS]

00:19:21 ◼   ► yeah and it's my right points out there [TS]

00:19:22 ◼   ► mostly decorative right the first 10 of [TS]

00:19:24 ◼   ► them end up on the floor immediately [TS]

00:19:26 ◼   ► yeah there's like three or four [TS]

00:19:27 ◼   ► underneath that Phil not even like a [TS]

00:19:30 ◼   ► plan even like a bag of feathers [TS]

00:19:32 ◼   ► it'sit's it looks very fine styrofoam [TS]

00:19:34 ◼   ► and it's way too soft for me [TS]

00:19:36 ◼   ► night don't like the headphone pillow [TS]

00:19:38 ◼   ► thing we lay down it goes all the way [TS]

00:19:40 ◼   ► around your head but then you know you [TS]

00:19:42 ◼   ► can always consult the pillow menu have [TS]

00:19:44 ◼   ► you ever called to get something from [TS]

00:19:45 ◼   ► the pillow menu [TS]

00:19:46 ◼   ► oh well I you know I'm allergic to [TS]

00:19:48 ◼   ► feathers is that right yes so that's why [TS]

00:19:51 ◼   ► you never wear bows at all well I do [TS]

00:19:54 ◼   ► have a boa [TS]

00:19:55 ◼   ► ok I just you're right i don't wear it [TS]

00:19:57 ◼   ► but I used to have to call down at [TS]

00:20:00 ◼   ► hotels to get a hypoallergenic pillow [TS]

00:20:02 ◼   ► but now now all the pillows seems it's a [TS]

00:20:05 ◼   ► rare hotel where all the pillows are [TS]

00:20:07 ◼   ► feather-light these to make them out of [TS]

00:20:08 ◼   ► the shrimp peanut butter but they [TS]

00:20:11 ◼   ► discovered this lucky more sensitive to [TS]

00:20:13 ◼   ► that [TS]

00:20:13 ◼   ► mmm yeah well i mean i-i but my feeling [TS]

00:20:17 ◼   ► when I walk into a hotel and it's it's [TS]

00:20:19 ◼   ► the bed is covered with pillows [TS]

00:20:20 ◼   ► decorative pillows i go to look at the [TS]

00:20:23 ◼   ► pillows and I try to determine the [TS]

00:20:26 ◼   ► pillow in that pile that is the least [TS]

00:20:28 ◼   ► likely pillow to have been employed in a [TS]

00:20:31 ◼   ► filthy sex act jong-il try and find that [TS]

00:20:35 ◼   ► fellow and it's usually I I assume it's [TS]

00:20:37 ◼   ► buried under all the other pillow i can [TS]

00:20:39 ◼   ► haz conversation with each other and I [TS]

00:20:41 ◼   ► don't listen to the other program idea [TS]

00:20:43 ◼   ► but I've talked about this on the last [TS]

00:20:44 ◼   ► three show you have all in the last [TS]

00:20:46 ◼   ► robbery shows whole week it's led to [TS]

00:20:48 ◼   ► something I apologize for anybody's for [TS]

00:20:50 ◼   ► the other program it's going to be [TS]

00:20:51 ◼   ► called man's assumption Occam's razor or [TS]

00:20:54 ◼   ► Murphy's Law man's assumption is that [TS]

00:20:56 ◼   ► everything in a hotel room has been in [TS]

00:20:57 ◼   ► somebody's ass at some point oh my god [TS]

00:21:00 ◼   ► well in that case let's be honest this [TS]

00:21:01 ◼   ► is we can now you were talking about a [TS]

00:21:02 ◼   ► guy on the on this show just assume that [TS]

00:21:05 ◼   ► somebody has come on everything in the [TS]

00:21:06 ◼   ► room because they probably have well in [TS]

00:21:08 ◼   ► our our former drummer to be layers when [TS]

00:21:12 ◼   ► we would enter a hotel room the first [TS]

00:21:13 ◼   ► thing he would do is grab the unused a [TS]

00:21:18 ◼   ► the unused garbage bag liner out of the [TS]

00:21:21 ◼   ► garbage can and he would walk over and [TS]

00:21:24 ◼   ► wrap it around the remote control haha [TS]

00:21:27 ◼   ► and and tie it off so that you could not [TS]

00:21:32 ◼   ► touch the remote control he would he [TS]

00:21:33 ◼   ► would grab the remote control with his [TS]

00:21:35 ◼   ► hand inside the bag like he was picking [TS]

00:21:37 ◼   ► up dog shit apart and it wrapping a tie [TS]

00:21:40 ◼   ► the bag around the remote control and [TS]

00:21:42 ◼   ► then he would you know then we could [TS]

00:21:43 ◼   ► happily search for me or whatever [TS]

00:21:45 ◼   ► through the channels of television right [TS]

00:21:47 ◼   ► without having to touch this thing that [TS]

00:21:49 ◼   ► he was absolutely certain had been all [TS]

00:21:52 ◼   ► the way up inside a person so this is it [TS]

00:21:55 ◼   ► was an incident it's a safe thing to do [TS]

00:21:57 ◼   ► it's like why you wipe off the top of [TS]

00:21:58 ◼   ► your pop can write the trucker's right [TS]

00:21:59 ◼   ► exactly because the trucker's RP and ask [TS]

00:22:02 ◼   ► you this now [TS]

00:22:02 ◼   ► now whenever when you're in there and [TS]

00:22:04 ◼   ► you're enjoying your your toilet paper [TS]

00:22:06 ◼   ► in the in the restroom let's be honest [TS]

00:22:08 ◼   ► it's probably not terribly expensive [TS]

00:22:09 ◼   ► toilet paper they fold it into a little [TS]

00:22:11 ◼   ► arrow literally don't get me started on [TS]

00:22:13 ◼   ► that you don't usually have entire blog [TS]

00:22:15 ◼   ► about folding paper toilet paper into a [TS]

00:22:17 ◼   ► point I didn't I I thought I knew all of [TS]

00:22:20 ◼   ► your people don't even know my place [TS]

00:22:22 ◼   ► called to quit touching my toilet paper [TS]

00:22:23 ◼   ► and down up sit down you're ready to [TS]

00:22:25 ◼   ► enjoy yourself right it'sit's daddy's [TS]

00:22:27 ◼   ► deuce time and so the phone rings what [TS]

00:22:31 ◼   ► there's a phone next if you so yeah sure [TS]

00:22:34 ◼   ► the next to the toilet you're going to [TS]

00:22:36 ◼   ► pick up somebody's gonna pick up a phone [TS]

00:22:37 ◼   ► that's next to a toilet like I just I'm [TS]

00:22:40 ◼   ► sorry I'm repeating myself because I [TS]

00:22:41 ◼   ► cannot stop thinking about this like it [TS]

00:22:43 ◼   ► I don't like picking up my daughter [TS]

00:22:45 ◼   ► likes to play with the phone in the room [TS]

00:22:46 ◼   ► you know so i unplug it but they don't [TS]

00:22:48 ◼   ► do I grabbed a giant pump of hand [TS]

00:22:50 ◼   ► sanitizer and like a crazy person to [TS]

00:22:52 ◼   ► cover the entire thing until it's [TS]

00:22:54 ◼   ► saturated and then wipe it all off you [TS]

00:22:56 ◼   ► know when I I've known I've known men [TS]

00:23:00 ◼   ► who when they're in there cops will [TS]

00:23:01 ◼   ► reveal things about what they have done [TS]

00:23:03 ◼   ► with objects men have done things with [TS]

00:23:06 ◼   ► objects so they certainly have I had a [TS]

00:23:08 ◼   ► friend who admitted to putting a piece [TS]

00:23:09 ◼   ► of rope in his ass cause he was bored [TS]

00:23:10 ◼   ► one day now a lot of people would say [TS]

00:23:12 ◼   ► that piece of rope is fine for every [TS]

00:23:13 ◼   ► purpose even who I'm just thinking a [TS]

00:23:16 ◼   ► phone phone can be a friend enormous [TS]

00:23:18 ◼   ► that he admitted this to you and hear [TS]

00:23:19 ◼   ► and his is his defense or his he was it [TS]

00:23:22 ◼   ► is that he wasn't he wasn't a good [TS]

00:23:23 ◼   ► friend Josie wasn't a good friend the [TS]

00:23:25 ◼   ► heat I little knots in it [TS]

00:23:27 ◼   ► oh that's actually a thing that is that [TS]

00:23:29 ◼   ► I've seen that the good vibrations and [TS]

00:23:31 ◼   ► they pull it out a little at a time [TS]

00:23:33 ◼   ► yeah what's the good vibrations is that [TS]

00:23:34 ◼   ► a sex store no it's a vibrator store [TS]

00:23:37 ◼   ► Oh [TS]

00:23:38 ◼   ► it'll sell sex per se is well I see you [TS]

00:23:42 ◼   ► can have a vibrator store and and it [TS]

00:23:45 ◼   ► doesn't fall into the under the rubric [TS]

00:23:47 ◼   ► of the sex store something you little [TS]

00:23:50 ◼   ► set fire to get you can you can make [TS]

00:23:53 ◼   ► milkshakes with that i'm sure you have [TS]

00:23:57 ◼   ► back pain you know like lower back pain [TS]

00:23:59 ◼   ► but i must let the let that go what ok [TS]

00:24:02 ◼   ► so first of all I guess there's probably [TS]

00:24:03 ◼   ► some like industry publication that says [TS]

00:24:06 ◼   ► people will feel like they're very [TS]

00:24:08 ◼   ► welcome and Khushi if you walk in and [TS]

00:24:10 ◼   ► there's 95 pillows on the bed maybe [TS]

00:24:11 ◼   ► that's like the first I mean like I i [TS]

00:24:14 ◼   ► I'm sorry John i feel like i've talked [TS]

00:24:15 ◼   ► about this a hundred times so I don't [TS]

00:24:16 ◼   ► talk about again but i have a whole [TS]

00:24:17 ◼   ► process I wanna do a whole show on the [TS]

00:24:19 ◼   ► whole plan to show a podcast i want a [TS]

00:24:20 ◼   ► whole podcast about hotels right try to [TS]

00:24:22 ◼   ► help people because i have process i [TS]

00:24:24 ◼   ► have an entire process from what I don't [TS]

00:24:25 ◼   ► know what are you trying to help hotel [TS]

00:24:27 ◼   ► people serve our customers better or you [TS]

00:24:29 ◼   ► try and help people who are going to [TS]

00:24:31 ◼   ► hotels uh avoid the pitfalls and the [TS]

00:24:35 ◼   ► landmines in every hotel me I used to be [TS]

00:24:38 ◼   ► very interested in the things I could do [TS]

00:24:39 ◼   ► to help people with their personal [TS]

00:24:40 ◼   ► productivity because I think it's [TS]

00:24:41 ◼   ► important to find the right mix of [TS]

00:24:43 ◼   ► things that help you do the work that's [TS]

00:24:44 ◼   ► important remember that made you famous [TS]

00:24:45 ◼   ► yeah I was rich and stuff and so here's [TS]

00:24:47 ◼   ► the thing today what I want to do in the [TS]

00:24:50 ◼   ► same way that i would say i like these [TS]

00:24:53 ◼   ► index cards for this use for this reason [TS]

00:24:55 ◼   ► this may or may not work for you what I [TS]

00:24:56 ◼   ► want to do is I want to share process [TS]

00:24:57 ◼   ► with people of what so far has worked [TS]

00:24:59 ◼   ► for me now it's like you know about the [TS]

00:25:01 ◼   ► bedbugs right you can't do anything [TS]

00:25:02 ◼   ► about the bedbugs you just got big bucks [TS]

00:25:04 ◼   ► that's just the thing now right yeah but [TS]

00:25:06 ◼   ► I mean I go through and through all the [TS]

00:25:10 ◼   ► food [TS]

00:25:11 ◼   ► alright because there's natural natural [TS]

00:25:13 ◼   ► worthiness they don't like me and I [TS]

00:25:15 ◼   ► think what it is is that I that I have [TS]

00:25:17 ◼   ► the antibodies for Lyme disease but but [TS]

00:25:21 ◼   ► I never got the I never got Lyme disease [TS]

00:25:23 ◼   ► I was tied to get that I was bitten by a [TS]

00:25:25 ◼   ► tick in the forest and I went to sit on [TS]

00:25:30 ◼   ► your familiar with just random one it [TS]

00:25:32 ◼   ► was just a strange tick [TS]

00:25:33 ◼   ► yeah it was a strange chick and I and I [TS]

00:25:35 ◼   ► had to I was in the Netherlands and I [TS]

00:25:39 ◼   ► went to I went to the nearest little [TS]

00:25:42 ◼   ► town and I said there's a tick in me and [TS]

00:25:46 ◼   ► the man and i had tried to get the [TS]

00:25:48 ◼   ► ticket out which is a mistake [TS]

00:25:51 ◼   ► Jim match to the match thing no I died I [TS]

00:25:54 ◼   ► didn't know what I scratched it with [TS]

00:25:55 ◼   ► your fingers and started the substitute [TS]

00:25:56 ◼   ► some ppl with two matchsticks that I we [TS]

00:26:00 ◼   ► don't match tricky especially [TS]

00:26:01 ◼   ► extinguished matches supposed to kill a [TS]

00:26:02 ◼   ► tick right but I you I don't know if you [TS]

00:26:05 ◼   ► want to kill it while it's lots little [TS]

00:26:06 ◼   ► head is still buried in you know I i had [TS]

00:26:09 ◼   ► two matchsticks and I put a rubber band [TS]

00:26:10 ◼   ► around and try to make a pair of [TS]

00:26:11 ◼   ► tweezers out of them but we go dutch 286 [TS]

00:26:14 ◼   ► open into this little town and there's [TS]

00:26:17 ◼   ► this kindly little Dutch doctor who said [TS]

00:26:20 ◼   ► oh here's the thing you just put a [TS]

00:26:22 ◼   ► little rubbing alcohol or really any [TS]

00:26:24 ◼   ► kind of alcohol on it and it will come [TS]

00:26:26 ◼   ► right out [TS]

00:26:27 ◼   ► it it won't kill it will still want to [TS]

00:26:29 ◼   ► get out of the antidote Vaseline because [TS]

00:26:31 ◼   ► it can't breathe right yeah so so he did [TS]

00:26:33 ◼   ► this and the tip came out and then later [TS]

00:26:36 ◼   ► on I went through a an area which was uh [TS]

00:26:39 ◼   ► all tix but there were no trees it was [TS]

00:26:42 ◼   ► just the delivery look like trees but [TS]

00:26:44 ◼   ► they were just piles of ticks and I had [TS]

00:26:47 ◼   ► ticks all over me and I got all these [TS]

00:26:49 ◼   ► ticks off but many many months later [TS]

00:26:51 ◼   ► when I was feeling not very good i went [TS]

00:26:53 ◼   ► to the doctor [TS]

00:26:54 ◼   ► it turned out I was not I was ill for [TS]

00:26:56 ◼   ► another reason but the doctor said you [TS]

00:26:57 ◼   ► have the antibodies for Lyme disease [TS]

00:26:59 ◼   ► you should watch and actually possibly [TS]

00:27:01 ◼   ► tell that there's a test any an [TS]

00:27:05 ◼   ► in-office procedure to find out if you [TS]

00:27:07 ◼   ► have the antibodies for Lyme disease [TS]

00:27:08 ◼   ► oh you didn't they screen for John maybe [TS]

00:27:11 ◼   ► it is or maybe I maybe I told him about [TS]

00:27:12 ◼   ► the ticket me any screen it's just like [TS]

00:27:15 ◼   ► if you sit second inoculation or [TS]

00:27:16 ◼   ► something like that he survived that now [TS]

00:27:17 ◼   ► you're strong against your text and I [TS]

00:27:19 ◼   ► think I'm strong against your tix and I [TS]

00:27:21 ◼   ► think also bedbugs they come up against [TS]

00:27:23 ◼   ► me and they smell my earthy scent and [TS]

00:27:25 ◼   ► they say move along move along nothing [TS]

00:27:28 ◼   ► to see here like a Jedi i would get [TS]

00:27:30 ◼   ► would love to have that I'm so scared of [TS]

00:27:32 ◼   ► bed bugs they totally freaked me out or [TS]

00:27:34 ◼   ► slice it likes you about the lycée if [TS]

00:27:36 ◼   ► he likes our kids school so make it [TS]

00:27:37 ◼   ► slice [TS]

00:27:38 ◼   ► yeah then you gotta check everybody for [TS]

00:27:40 ◼   ► lice and then you gotta put all the toys [TS]

00:27:41 ◼   ► and get this affect everything but all [TS]

00:27:43 ◼   ► the toys and garbage bags and cut off [TS]

00:27:44 ◼   ► the air so the lights on your children's [TS]

00:27:46 ◼   ► toys will die so i have a bunch of times [TS]

00:27:48 ◼   ► when I was a kid really because I really [TS]

00:27:51 ◼   ► you know because there was no gathering [TS]

00:27:52 ◼   ► of kids that I didn't want to get in the [TS]

00:27:54 ◼   ► center of and rub my head all over their [TS]

00:27:57 ◼   ► heads was a thing when i was a kid you [TS]

00:28:00 ◼   ► have you got a pretty big head [TS]

00:28:02 ◼   ► yeah that's true and you and I scene [TS]

00:28:04 ◼   ► photos you leave i'm trying to think [TS]

00:28:06 ◼   ► it's because look good on television out [TS]

00:28:08 ◼   ► no question about it [TS]

00:28:09 ◼   ► people people people like me i have a [TS]

00:28:12 ◼   ► normal-sized head is john darnielle eyes [TS]

00:28:13 ◼   ► I look really dishonest one of my video [TS]

00:28:15 ◼   ► told us on the shifty shifting i love [TS]

00:28:18 ◼   ► that John Darnielle but you know we got [TS]

00:28:19 ◼   ► the eyes are too close together when I [TS]

00:28:21 ◼   ► pals or anything but you know I'm saying [TS]

00:28:22 ◼   ► you see somebody with the eyes are too [TS]

00:28:23 ◼   ► close together [TS]

00:28:24 ◼   ► mm it's like the opposite of a baby we [TS]

00:28:26 ◼   ► like babies because they got the big [TS]

00:28:27 ◼   ► eyes big eyes right far apart like 80 [TS]

00:28:30 ◼   ► that's why I like a baby [TS]

00:28:31 ◼   ► whatever I've always felt because i'm a [TS]

00:28:34 ◼   ► big blonde person I've always been [TS]

00:28:37 ◼   ► somewhat confused by the fact that I [TS]

00:28:38 ◼   ► have kind of i have a slanty eyes you [TS]

00:28:43 ◼   ► know in a way like a laplander who is [TS]

00:28:46 ◼   ► constantly searching across the snowy [TS]

00:28:48 ◼   ► planes for his reindeer I have these [TS]

00:28:51 ◼   ► like lives that are always half open and [TS]

00:28:54 ◼   ► kind of is there's a ping pong isn't as [TS]

00:28:56 ◼   ► finds their scrunched up for their [TS]

00:28:57 ◼   ► almond II know they're not all men be [TS]

00:29:00 ◼   ► there scrunchie there's there squinty [TS]

00:29:02 ◼   ► okay it might be that it might be [TS]

00:29:05 ◼   ► because i'm a high plains drifter also [TS]

00:29:07 ◼   ► that's another way to identify high [TS]

00:29:09 ◼   ► plains drifter by his kind of weather [TS]

00:29:12 ◼   ► beaten squinty eyes are Stan you know we [TS]

00:29:15 ◼   ► all say something John at Sunderland [TS]

00:29:17 ◼   ► ever told you this but I definitely felt [TS]

00:29:19 ◼   ► this way about my late father and there [TS]

00:29:21 ◼   ► are a few other people i felt i don't [TS]

00:29:23 ◼   ► think i've ever known anybody who looks [TS]

00:29:25 ◼   ► more different with the glasses off then [TS]

00:29:29 ◼   ► you can contact Superman haha right they [TS]

00:29:31 ◼   ► look exactly the same [TS]

00:29:32 ◼   ► you look so different and what's funny [TS]

00:29:35 ◼   ► is of course you have many different [TS]

00:29:36 ◼   ► pairs of glasses at some point we should [TS]

00:29:38 ◼   ► address the glasses issue right you have [TS]

00:29:40 ◼   ► well when I was at your house the time [TS]

00:29:43 ◼   ► you gave me the glasses my sister-in-law [TS]

00:29:44 ◼   ► throwaway not that i'm mad you had it [TS]

00:29:46 ◼   ► memory serves through to two or three of [TS]

00:29:50 ◼   ► the racks from a drug store full of [TS]

00:29:51 ◼   ► vintage frames [TS]

00:29:52 ◼   ► yeah i have about now probably a hundred [TS]

00:29:55 ◼   ► and seventy pairs of glasses that's all [TS]

00:29:58 ◼   ► i would guess more well because I keep [TS]

00:30:01 ◼   ► giving them away to people whose sisters [TS]

00:30:03 ◼   ► small keeps throwing you remember those [TS]

00:30:05 ◼   ► classes term how cool is were those are [TS]

00:30:07 ◼   ► gorgeous glasses and in fact if i recall [TS]

00:30:09 ◼   ► they were [TS]

00:30:11 ◼   ► they were they became your signature [TS]

00:30:13 ◼   ► look and not by design but it when I [TS]

00:30:16 ◼   ► stopped wearing them people said where's [TS]

00:30:17 ◼   ► your glasses right now we found a pair [TS]

00:30:20 ◼   ► without another pair too i don't see [TS]

00:30:22 ◼   ► replace those but there are you know [TS]

00:30:24 ◼   ► pretty pretty pretty [TS]

00:30:25 ◼   ► yeah but you look so i can describe [TS]

00:30:29 ◼   ► quite what it is I don't know if I'd say [TS]

00:30:30 ◼   ► you look lapland Landy's slap that blend [TS]

00:30:33 ◼   ► desk lapland lambie's else am I junquera [TS]

00:30:36 ◼   ► i was going to joke about reindeer [TS]

00:30:38 ◼   ► because that's exactly one thing I know [TS]

00:30:39 ◼   ► about laugh lines that they have cute [TS]

00:30:41 ◼   ► hats too right [TS]

00:30:42 ◼   ► they do well then and sweaters they're [TS]

00:30:44 ◼   ► very sweaty people now first I'm sorry [TS]

00:30:49 ◼   ► about the glasses off I mean things you [TS]

00:30:51 ◼   ► could wear any of your crazy Elton John [TS]

00:30:53 ◼   ► glasses like any of those many glasses [TS]

00:30:55 ◼   ► does this creepy Elvis 10 i have a photo [TS]

00:30:57 ◼   ► that i will put up with you and my [TS]

00:30:58 ◼   ► daughter when you have the missing tooth [TS]

00:31:00 ◼   ► and the long hair and the Elvis classes [TS]

00:31:02 ◼   ► ppl was going but you still look like [TS]

00:31:04 ◼   ► you whether even with one with the tooth [TS]

00:31:06 ◼   ► missing and the crazy hair you always [TS]

00:31:08 ◼   ► look like you beard or no beard you [TS]

00:31:09 ◼   ► always look at what you take your [TS]

00:31:10 ◼   ► glasses off I swear to god you look like [TS]

00:31:13 ◼   ► you look like your brother-in-law or [TS]

00:31:14 ◼   ► something and and what is the change of [TS]

00:31:16 ◼   ► what do I look like without my glasses [TS]

00:31:18 ◼   ► on your eyes or handsome how the fuck [TS]

00:31:22 ◼   ► you can get more handsome [TS]

00:31:24 ◼   ► I don't you know I don't know what it is [TS]

00:31:26 ◼   ► like this question i'm offering is as [TS]

00:31:28 ◼   ► anyone ever told you that before [TS]

00:31:30 ◼   ► well it's a thing I kind of keep under [TS]

00:31:34 ◼   ► wraps because in the event i ever get to [TS]

00:31:37 ◼   ► go on the layout enough said [TS]

00:31:39 ◼   ► did you take my glasses off and blend [TS]

00:31:41 ◼   ► into a crowd nobody would ever notice me [TS]

00:31:43 ◼   ► you are you're in the spice stuff [TS]

00:31:45 ◼   ► yeah doesn't that needs to be one of my [TS]

00:31:48 ◼   ► I know this is a tricky thing but like I [TS]

00:31:49 ◼   ► gotta say like when I was a youngster [TS]

00:31:51 ◼   ► nautic maybe not kidding exactly but [TS]

00:31:53 ◼   ► that was one of the things that [TS]

00:31:54 ◼   ► fascinated me the most when I would read [TS]

00:31:56 ◼   ► not let you say i'm on a piker I'm not [TS]

00:31:58 ◼   ► going anywhere near what you have done [TS]

00:32:00 ◼   ► with reading up on this but when I would [TS]

00:32:02 ◼   ► read about how to do disguises that was [TS]

00:32:04 ◼   ► the part that always blew my mind [TS]

00:32:06 ◼   ► because it was all is all life hacks it [TS]

00:32:07 ◼   ► was stuff like put put newspaper in your [TS]

00:32:10 ◼   ► shoes so you'll walk a little bit [TS]

00:32:11 ◼   ► different like this it's an entire way [TS]

00:32:13 ◼   ► to become this different person it's way [TS]

00:32:15 ◼   ► more than like a fake mustache [TS]

00:32:16 ◼   ► it's a way of carrying yourself [TS]

00:32:18 ◼   ► differently without attracting attention [TS]

00:32:21 ◼   ► is that right it is it's absolutely true [TS]

00:32:23 ◼   ► it's not shoe polishing the hair [TS]

00:32:25 ◼   ► are in a different shirt there's a lot [TS]

00:32:26 ◼   ► more to it yeah you just you put put put [TS]

00:32:28 ◼   ► a little pebble or up or a pin in your [TS]

00:32:30 ◼   ► in your shoe and all of a sudden you've [TS]

00:32:33 ◼   ► got like as like a strange gate and half [TS]

00:32:36 ◼   ► the people you know wouldn't recognize [TS]

00:32:37 ◼   ► you now me I I when I catch myself I [TS]

00:32:41 ◼   ► don't think of myself as someone who has [TS]

00:32:42 ◼   ► like terrible posture but I know I don't [TS]

00:32:44 ◼   ► have good posture but I I real if I [TS]

00:32:47 ◼   ► catch myself doing walking the way I [TS]

00:32:49 ◼   ► usually walk all the time or sometimes [TS]

00:32:51 ◼   ► just straight up the tiniest bit and I [TS]

00:32:53 ◼   ► can tell that I probably look different [TS]

00:32:54 ◼   ► now you you're a big guy and you seem to [TS]

00:32:57 ◼   ► have you walked all I'm just saying if [TS]

00:32:58 ◼   ► you had to disguise yourself if you / [TS]

00:33:00 ◼   ► down just a little bit you you'd look [TS]

00:33:02 ◼   ► pretty different right well and one of [TS]

00:33:04 ◼   ► the things that I do is I walked my toes [TS]

00:33:07 ◼   ► my toes pronate is that is that the word [TS]

00:33:11 ◼   ► know my toes [TS]

00:33:13 ◼   ► well I walk with my toes pointing a [TS]

00:33:15 ◼   ► little bit out like a ballerina like a [TS]

00:33:18 ◼   ► like a ballerina like a giant ballerina [TS]

00:33:21 ◼   ► and sometimes i will intentionally as if [TS]

00:33:24 ◼   ► I have a long distance to walk i will [TS]

00:33:26 ◼   ► intentionally change the the angle of [TS]

00:33:29 ◼   ► where my toes are pointing so that I'm [TS]

00:33:31 ◼   ► pointing my toes directly straight ahead [TS]

00:33:34 ◼   ► and it changes the whole architecture of [TS]

00:33:37 ◼   ► my of my body and my gate itself right [TS]

00:33:41 ◼   ► yeah and I do you have satellites for [TS]

00:33:45 ◼   ► watching from a satellite right there [TS]

00:33:46 ◼   ► it's like the same people walking single [TS]

00:33:48 ◼   ► file to disguise their numbers you you [TS]

00:33:50 ◼   ► move that you're so you're almost like a [TS]

00:33:52 ◼   ► bear wearing shoes [TS]

00:33:53 ◼   ► it's something we're gonna go wait a [TS]

00:33:54 ◼   ► minute because clearly i can tell [TS]

00:33:56 ◼   ► because this is it like an inch into the [TS]

00:33:57 ◼   ► earth that this is somebody heavy but [TS]

00:34:00 ◼   ► you don't see people wearing like a like [TS]

00:34:01 ◼   ► a size six converse you know walking out [TS]

00:34:04 ◼   ► on the force that would throw everybody [TS]

00:34:05 ◼   ► off right yes everything works converse [TS]

00:34:08 ◼   ► you know that that would see and i can't [TS]

00:34:11 ◼   ► i can't shave my beard and change my [TS]

00:34:14 ◼   ► appearance because i have a beard shaped [TS]

00:34:16 ◼   ► face if I shave my beard most of the [TS]

00:34:19 ◼   ► time people don't even notice the beard [TS]

00:34:20 ◼   ► is gone [TS]

00:34:20 ◼   ► is that code for a week in does that [TS]

00:34:22 ◼   ► mean no it means a it means a chin [TS]

00:34:24 ◼   ► shaped like a beard i have have such a [TS]

00:34:27 ◼   ► big chin that that the beard is just [TS]

00:34:31 ◼   ► like that yes let me learn from the [TS]

00:34:32 ◼   ► Dutch doctor is that something you've [TS]

00:34:34 ◼   ► always know well I remember as a [TS]

00:34:36 ◼   ► teenager when my [TS]

00:34:38 ◼   ► when my face went from teenage face to [TS]

00:34:42 ◼   ► adult face and I definitely noticed [TS]

00:34:45 ◼   ► where did all this ordered all this ja [TS]

00:34:47 ◼   ► come from much much much bigger faced [TS]

00:34:51 ◼   ► now but so it is seriously it happens to [TS]

00:34:54 ◼   ► me all the time I shaved my beard and [TS]

00:34:56 ◼   ► people come up people who have seen me [TS]

00:34:58 ◼   ► every day for a year come up and say [TS]

00:35:00 ◼   ► including my mom who say two or did you [TS]

00:35:04 ◼   ► change the partner hair are you wearing [TS]

00:35:06 ◼   ► a different pair of glasses I totally [TS]

00:35:08 ◼   ► know II mean I'm like I changed my [TS]

00:35:10 ◼   ► freaking beard i've been wearing it for [TS]

00:35:12 ◼   ► I have had appeared for two years and [TS]

00:35:14 ◼   ► today I don't you don't even notice [TS]

00:35:16 ◼   ► whereas other people like like weak chin [TS]

00:35:19 ◼   ► people who shave a beard and you go oh I [TS]

00:35:24 ◼   ► can usually I'm pretty good [TS]

00:35:26 ◼   ► iight i would not want to say anything [TS]

00:35:28 ◼   ► that makes anybody in our audience [TS]

00:35:29 ◼   ► self-conscious but I'm pretty good you [TS]

00:35:32 ◼   ► know what I'm clocking you don't need to [TS]

00:35:34 ◼   ► be clocked yes okay like so like if [TS]

00:35:37 ◼   ► you're somebody who's doing a whole [TS]

00:35:39 ◼   ► gender thing right as you do [TS]

00:35:43 ◼   ► yeah well you can pass i don't--there's [TS]

00:35:45 ◼   ► other terms you might have noticed in [TS]

00:35:47 ◼   ► the early nineties you can pass or you [TS]

00:35:48 ◼   ► can be clocked em and when your clock [TS]

00:35:50 ◼   ► that's what something looks because I [TS]

00:35:51 ◼   ► let's really do right and and I think [TS]

00:35:53 ◼   ► there are a lot of people with things [TS]

00:35:55 ◼   ► like I hope this stuff this isn't [TS]

00:35:56 ◼   ► ping-pong talk things like comb-overs or [TS]

00:35:59 ◼   ► comb for words right now this is in the [TS]

00:36:02 ◼   ► days you know like today you at least [TS]

00:36:04 ◼   ► you have the option right like how many [TS]

00:36:06 ◼   ► of our good friends have shaved their [TS]

00:36:07 ◼   ► heads look awesome now like that one [TS]

00:36:09 ◼   ► used to be an option in the nineteen [TS]

00:36:10 ◼   ► seventies even in the eighties that was [TS]

00:36:12 ◼   ► not an option [TS]

00:36:13 ◼   ► I got a guy that I used to work for a [TS]

00:36:14 ◼   ► guy that was the source of a lot of my [TS]

00:36:16 ◼   ► paying work with this guy got a swimming [TS]

00:36:18 ◼   ► pool it was crazy [TS]

00:36:19 ◼   ► I mean look like Ali McGraw from one [TS]

00:36:21 ◼   ► side you know I mean oh well it's not [TS]

00:36:24 ◼   ► like McGraw but you know maybe like you [TS]

00:36:26 ◼   ► know Thor something because his hair his [TS]

00:36:28 ◼   ► hair went down to his shoulder and he [TS]

00:36:30 ◼   ► did this amazing architectural Frank [TS]

00:36:32 ◼   ► Gehry thing to make it fly up and you [TS]

00:36:35 ◼   ► can see the hairspray like glistening on [TS]

00:36:36 ◼   ► it but i also have friends that remember [TS]

00:36:39 ◼   ► the Caesar remember when George Clooney [TS]

00:36:40 ◼   ► made the Caesar kind of catch on [TS]

00:36:42 ◼   ► sure well then the season was very [TS]

00:36:44 ◼   ► popular with the gay men in the early [TS]

00:36:46 ◼   ► nineties to it always comes back the [TS]

00:36:48 ◼   ► Caesar always comes back [TS]

00:36:49 ◼   ► well yes it was ariana grande know the [TS]

00:36:51 ◼   ► perfect [TS]

00:36:52 ◼   ► national soccer player who is by all [TS]

00:36:54 ◼   ► accounts a bald man he looks like he has [TS]

00:36:57 ◼   ► a full head of hair because he's he's [TS]

00:37:00 ◼   ► rocking the Caesar one up for a long [TS]

00:37:02 ◼   ► time certainly I mean there there's so [TS]

00:37:03 ◼   ► much we know now about bald men that we [TS]

00:37:05 ◼   ► didn't know in the seventies because you [TS]

00:37:06 ◼   ► could you could you could get away with [TS]

00:37:08 ◼   ► a lot you know I mean look right there [TS]

00:37:10 ◼   ► see brian eno when he was back in Roxy [TS]

00:37:12 ◼   ► Music he rocked it [TS]

00:37:13 ◼   ► he had tears just you ever see what he [TS]

00:37:14 ◼   ► looks like when using roxy music of [TS]

00:37:16 ◼   ► course he rocked it in the in the same [TS]

00:37:19 ◼   ► way that the that character from rocky [TS]

00:37:22 ◼   ► horror picture show rocked it [TS]

00:37:24 ◼   ► I'm just say which is to say grotesquely [TS]

00:37:26 ◼   ► that's a terrible look bald with long [TS]

00:37:29 ◼   ► stringy super Swiss hair and he says [TS]

00:37:32 ◼   ► that just says I'm a high-level cleric [TS]

00:37:34 ◼   ► on saturdays it's really i mean that's [TS]

00:37:36 ◼   ► exactly what it is if you are going to [TS]

00:37:38 ◼   ► dress if you were going to dress like [TS]

00:37:40 ◼   ► one of the members of Jethro tall or [TS]

00:37:42 ◼   ► you're going to dress like mick [TS]

00:37:44 ◼   ► fleetwood on the cover of rumors but you [TS]

00:37:48 ◼   ► are more than welcome and complete with [TS]

00:37:49 ◼   ► another one [TS]

00:37:50 ◼   ► it's great to like let your hair over [TS]

00:37:52 ◼   ► your ears grow long and and then on the [TS]

00:37:54 ◼   ► top of your head which is bald just have [TS]

00:37:56 ◼   ► a few really long single strands of hair [TS]

00:37:59 ◼   ► that is a that is not i don't want to [TS]

00:38:03 ◼   ► work ping pong but this is big in my [TS]

00:38:04 ◼   ► neighborhood John if you seen especially [TS]

00:38:06 ◼   ► with the Chinese men have you seen like [TS]

00:38:09 ◼   ► the six discreet string lots of hair [TS]

00:38:11 ◼   ► across the top thing a bit of slather [TS]

00:38:13 ◼   ► down with vaseline or something I don't [TS]

00:38:15 ◼   ► know it's anyway it's but the bit you [TS]

00:38:17 ◼   ► know why it's a move [TS]

00:38:18 ◼   ► you know I I respect but here's the [TS]

00:38:20 ◼   ► thing is i gotta do is I got topic here [TS]

00:38:22 ◼   ► like I don't think you don't seem to [TS]

00:38:23 ◼   ► suffer from either there you got a full [TS]

00:38:24 ◼   ► head of hair you got the beard but [TS]

00:38:25 ◼   ► you're absolutely right sometimes you'll [TS]

00:38:27 ◼   ► get a like writing some photos of you [TS]

00:38:28 ◼   ► lately [TS]

00:38:29 ◼   ► you look great you got like a [TS]

00:38:30 ◼   ► professional man's haircut it looks like [TS]

00:38:32 ◼   ► well I'm cutting my own hair still I'm [TS]

00:38:33 ◼   ► just getting better at it [TS]

00:38:35 ◼   ► whoa whoa hang on really you can turn [TS]

00:38:37 ◼   ► here I've got my own hair for over 10 [TS]

00:38:39 ◼   ► years and which is why which is why my [TS]

00:38:43 ◼   ► haircut vary so much because because [TS]

00:38:46 ◼   ► most of my haircuts take place is that [TS]

00:38:48 ◼   ► why you stopped drinking I mean was it [TS]

00:38:49 ◼   ► just getting here to scare what happened [TS]

00:38:50 ◼   ► up now that happened before but at [TS]

00:38:54 ◼   ► certain point there along the way when i [TS]

00:38:55 ◼   ► realized that i could shave dry but I [TS]

00:38:59 ◼   ► didn't even need water anymore that I [TS]

00:39:01 ◼   ► could just shave with a razor dry [TS]

00:39:03 ◼   ► because of course if you use shaving [TS]

00:39:06 ◼   ► cream song can smell you from at from [TS]

00:39:09 ◼   ► across the river so that so for a long [TS]

00:39:12 ◼   ► time I was shaving with hot water and [TS]

00:39:14 ◼   ► then I then I realized I could just [TS]

00:39:16 ◼   ► shave dry at that point I was I was [TS]

00:39:19 ◼   ► liberated I was free I was free from the [TS]

00:39:21 ◼   ► from the whole I mean it the entire i [TS]

00:39:23 ◼   ► love walgreens that deals with male [TS]

00:39:27 ◼   ► shaving products just be the beer [TS]

00:39:29 ◼   ► Boswell for half a second here for [TS]

00:39:30 ◼   ► anybody that is important to go through [TS]

00:39:32 ◼   ► this but also want to say for anybody's [TS]

00:39:33 ◼   ► interested in this you went into a lot [TS]

00:39:35 ◼   ► of detail about the genesis behind this [TS]

00:39:36 ◼   ► and the revelations you went through all [TS]

00:39:38 ◼   ► of this in an episode if memory serves [TS]

00:39:40 ◼   ► it was called the Vietcong can smell the [TS]

00:39:43 ◼   ► scents right that's right and you went [TS]

00:39:45 ◼   ► through the history of wanting to [TS]

00:39:46 ◼   ► eventually become some kind of a person [TS]

00:39:49 ◼   ► espionage [TS]

00:39:50 ◼   ► yes the cleanup that but the haircutting [TS]

00:39:52 ◼   ► what I realized at that point was that [TS]

00:39:55 ◼   ► as I was freeing myself from these [TS]

00:39:58 ◼   ► tyranny knees or to quote the great [TS]

00:40:00 ◼   ► philosopher as i freed myself from [TS]

00:40:03 ◼   ► mental slavery none but ourselves can [TS]

00:40:06 ◼   ► free our minds have no fear from atomic [TS]

00:40:09 ◼   ► energy because none of them a chemist [TS]

00:40:12 ◼   ► top of the time I can guess who it is [TS]

00:40:16 ◼   ► as you were saying I kept going through [TS]

00:40:17 ◼   ► I said it first of those nicha than I [TS]

00:40:20 ◼   ► thought [TS]

00:40:20 ◼   ► Merv Griffin and I thought my person [TS]

00:40:21 ◼   ► right how long shall they kill our [TS]

00:40:23 ◼   ► prophets while we stand aside and look [TS]

00:40:25 ◼   ► some say it's just a part of it [TS]

00:40:28 ◼   ► dreamland we've got to fulfill the book [TS]

00:40:30 ◼   ► to kevin who is a hit that that's good [TS]

00:40:34 ◼   ► it's your hero bob marley huh [TS]

00:40:41 ◼   ► hey that's pretty that's what I that was [TS]

00:40:43 ◼   ► pretty good he's a very smart man i [TS]

00:40:45 ◼   ► don't want this up I'm not lyrics [TS]

00:40:47 ◼   ► because because i like Bob Marley I [TS]

00:40:50 ◼   ► think he is good looking like him is it [TS]

00:40:55 ◼   ► dude [TS]

00:40:56 ◼   ► I'll i enjoy the I enjoy reggae music so [TS]

00:41:01 ◼   ► it was really touched by the success you [TS]

00:41:04 ◼   ► had doing espionage Alec a nice exciting [TS]

00:41:07 ◼   ► i decided i was going to go the whole [TS]

00:41:09 ◼   ► hog [TS]

00:41:10 ◼   ► I was going to free myself from the from [TS]

00:41:12 ◼   ► because it how many times I mean you [TS]

00:41:14 ◼   ► have a whole photo blog about this [TS]

00:41:16 ◼   ► of times you go in to a hair salon to [TS]

00:41:19 ◼   ► get a haircut and and you come out the [TS]

00:41:22 ◼   ► other side and it's like that's not what [TS]

00:41:23 ◼   ► I was going for [TS]

00:41:24 ◼   ► and then you have all the fun of letting [TS]

00:41:26 ◼   ► your hair grow out and you look like a [TS]

00:41:28 ◼   ► crazy person and then you go and get [TS]

00:41:30 ◼   ► your haircut again and that they didn't [TS]

00:41:31 ◼   ► get it right again and I was like listen [TS]

00:41:34 ◼   ► if somebody's gonna get somebody's not [TS]

00:41:35 ◼   ► going to get it right if somebody is [TS]

00:41:37 ◼   ► going to give me a bad haircut [TS]

00:41:38 ◼   ► it might as well be me let it be me and [TS]

00:41:41 ◼   ► I started cutting my own hair and i have [TS]

00:41:42 ◼   ► been doing it for a long time now I cut [TS]

00:41:45 ◼   ► other people's hair i cut my mom's hair [TS]

00:41:47 ◼   ► way [TS]

00:41:48 ◼   ► really yeah my mom comes to my house and [TS]

00:41:50 ◼   ► says can you give me a community is very [TS]

00:41:52 ◼   ► earthy haircut she says she's universal [TS]

00:41:54 ◼   ► we just got always stimulate your mom is [TS]

00:41:56 ◼   ► awesome and she seems very practical [TS]

00:41:58 ◼   ► yes I could essentially going like what [TS]

00:42:00 ◼   ► my mom didn't like having it done I [TS]

00:42:02 ◼   ► would never see her getting it set and [TS]

00:42:03 ◼   ► stuff now [TS]

00:42:04 ◼   ► well and then she started cutting it [TS]

00:42:05 ◼   ► herself so now she cuts her own hair and [TS]

00:42:08 ◼   ► then comes to me to do that like [TS]

00:42:10 ◼   ► treatment touch-ups yeah but I what's up [TS]

00:42:12 ◼   ► but my problem is I always the idea to [TS]

00:42:15 ◼   ► cut my hair always is at its strongest [TS]

00:42:17 ◼   ► at three o'clock in the morning which is [TS]

00:42:21 ◼   ► really that it's a bad time to make [TS]

00:42:23 ◼   ► decisions three o'clock in the morning [TS]

00:42:24 ◼   ► herald because you get these three [TS]

00:42:26 ◼   ► o'clock in the morning is a great time [TS]

00:42:27 ◼   ► to clean the house but it is a terrible [TS]

00:42:29 ◼   ► time to cut your hair because you start [TS]

00:42:32 ◼   ► cutting it and you lose yourself in the [TS]

00:42:34 ◼   ► insanity of them of the of the night and [TS]

00:42:38 ◼   ► pretty soon here is flying everywhere [TS]

00:42:40 ◼   ► I mean I have given myself some haircuts [TS]

00:42:42 ◼   ► that seemed like a great idea people [TS]

00:42:46 ◼   ► it's that if the what was sort of [TS]

00:42:48 ◼   ► looking for its the her hirsute man's [TS]

00:42:49 ◼   ► version of drunk dialing I mean at what [TS]

00:42:52 ◼   ► I would worry yes secondarily I would [TS]

00:42:53 ◼   ► worry about the quality of the haircut [TS]

00:42:55 ◼   ► but even more and I know you know this [TS]

00:42:57 ◼   ► from women I don't want to ping pong but [TS]

00:42:59 ◼   ► but the impulse to do something it free [TS]

00:43:01 ◼   ► to your hair or for your hair of your [TS]

00:43:03 ◼   ► hair almost always reflect something [TS]

00:43:06 ◼   ► much deeper and the 3m voice is not a [TS]

00:43:07 ◼   ► good voice to listen to about how you [TS]

00:43:09 ◼   ► should do your hair right and so usually [TS]

00:43:11 ◼   ► my haircuts are are in three stages so I [TS]

00:43:14 ◼   ► do the 3m haircut and then the following [TS]

00:43:17 ◼   ► day at about two o'clock in the [TS]

00:43:20 ◼   ► afternoon when I have identified all the [TS]

00:43:22 ◼   ► problems with what I did the night [TS]

00:43:24 ◼   ► before and I do the two in the afternoon [TS]

00:43:26 ◼   ► like try and get into some kind of shape [TS]

00:43:29 ◼   ► and then over the next week there's a [TS]

00:43:34 ◼   ► kind of trickling later stage of every [TS]

00:43:38 ◼   ► time I walk past a mirror I got up and I [TS]

00:43:41 ◼   ► get a pair of scissors and I cut some [TS]

00:43:42 ◼   ► little thing off and then after about a [TS]

00:43:48 ◼   ► week of that it usually is comes into [TS]

00:43:51 ◼   ► comes into line right now though I I i [TS]

00:43:54 ◼   ► did a good haircut several months ago [TS]

00:43:56 ◼   ► such that now it's growing out well how [TS]

00:44:00 ◼   ► that I'm good haircut [TS]

00:44:01 ◼   ► yeah and I'm just let alone i went in [TS]

00:44:03 ◼   ► the i went in last night with a pair of [TS]

00:44:05 ◼   ► scissors and looked at myself in the [TS]

00:44:06 ◼   ► mirror with a pair of scissors and I [TS]

00:44:08 ◼   ► thought put the scissors down to confine [TS]

00:44:11 ◼   ► he walks up to the mirror with the comb [TS]

00:44:12 ◼   ► exactly [TS]

00:44:13 ◼   ► hey I was like you're fine you're fine [TS]

00:44:16 ◼   ► don't do not fuck with it right now just [TS]

00:44:18 ◼   ► what brings you AI thought I I just [TS]

00:44:21 ◼   ► probably got time for this probably but [TS]

00:44:22 ◼   ► what is it that obviously already up at [TS]

00:44:25 ◼   ► 3am well possibly I mean you know you're [TS]

00:44:28 ◼   ► late sleeper you go to bed late right [TS]

00:44:31 ◼   ► yeah 3 IM is is a that's that's a great [TS]

00:44:33 ◼   ► time for certain things but a better [TS]

00:44:37 ◼   ► there are other things that it's [TS]

00:44:39 ◼   ► terrible for you I actually writing one [TS]

00:44:41 ◼   ► is it just because you need something to [TS]

00:44:43 ◼   ► do with your hands are no I think that [TS]

00:44:47 ◼   ► 3m is the hour of dissatisfaction [TS]

00:44:49 ◼   ► oh I read the whole thing about this the [TS]

00:44:51 ◼   ► other day heroin and I've never [TS]

00:44:52 ◼   ► considered myself an insomniac there's [TS]

00:44:54 ◼   ► been times when I haven't slept as much [TS]

00:44:56 ◼   ► as I'd like but I read this amazing [TS]

00:44:57 ◼   ► article [TS]

00:44:57 ◼   ► well sent to you that that was it's [TS]

00:45:00 ◼   ► basically about all the authors and [TS]

00:45:01 ◼   ► everybody like spring from the [TS]

00:45:03 ◼   ► perspective of saying if you are an [TS]

00:45:04 ◼   ► insomniac or anybody's ever had trouble [TS]

00:45:06 ◼   ► sleeping [TS]

00:45:06 ◼   ► if you're not like that you have no idea [TS]

00:45:09 ◼   ► what it's like and go through these like [TS]

00:45:11 ◼   ► the three horrific dark night of the [TS]

00:45:13 ◼   ► soul stages of insomnia that it just [TS]

00:45:16 ◼   ► sounds it sounds completely harrowing [TS]

00:45:18 ◼   ► and it starts out where you're like oh I [TS]

00:45:19 ◼   ► can't sleep then you get into like going [TS]

00:45:22 ◼   ► through everything you've ever done [TS]

00:45:23 ◼   ► wrong in your life and and error and a [TS]

00:45:27 ◼   ► nice one or like no I'm sorry today's [TS]

00:45:28 ◼   ► test step three step two is every [TS]

00:45:31 ◼   ► everyone you've wronged you go through [TS]

00:45:33 ◼   ► that then by the time right before done [TS]

00:45:35 ◼   ► like you're just sitting there [TS]

00:45:37 ◼   ► compulsively cataloging everything that [TS]

00:45:39 ◼   ► you ever [TS]

00:45:40 ◼   ► or ever done wrong yeah it's it's lovely [TS]

00:45:42 ◼   ► and of course the courses that happen to [TS]

00:45:44 ◼   ► you have first of all he is much more [TS]

00:45:46 ◼   ► comfortable saying and you had that [TS]

00:45:47 ◼   ► experience at all absolutely but you [TS]

00:45:49 ◼   ► know i have i have routinely stayed up [TS]

00:45:50 ◼   ► for 48 hours to really push the envelope [TS]

00:45:53 ◼   ► on the on those feelings but even just [TS]

00:45:57 ◼   ► last night at three o'clock in the [TS]

00:45:59 ◼   ► morning i did one of those things which [TS]

00:46:02 ◼   ► you know which is a which is I try to do [TS]

00:46:06 ◼   ► infrequently now where I responded to [TS]

00:46:09 ◼   ► someone's angry email by going through [TS]

00:46:12 ◼   ► and responding after every sentence that [TS]

00:46:16 ◼   ► they wrote so they wrote me a paragraph [TS]

00:46:18 ◼   ► and then I went in and after every [TS]

00:46:20 ◼   ► sentence wrote a paragraph about their [TS]

00:46:22 ◼   ► sentence was like here's what you're [TS]

00:46:25 ◼   ► trying to do in this sentence and here's [TS]

00:46:27 ◼   ► why it's not working and then i would [TS]

00:46:29 ◼   ► let them say another sentence and then i [TS]

00:46:31 ◼   ► would say here's why this sentence is a [TS]

00:46:34 ◼   ► total fail also created here are the [TS]

00:46:37 ◼   ► here are the ploys that you are [TS]

00:46:39 ◼   ► employing to try and guilt me into these [TS]

00:46:43 ◼   ► are here and a Cyrano on [TS]

00:46:45 ◼   ► yeah you think you're gonna tell me I [TS]

00:46:46 ◼   ► got a big nose let me tell you about big [TS]

00:46:48 ◼   ► noses no see now I hate that style of [TS]

00:46:51 ◼   ► argumentation the one where you were [TS]

00:46:53 ◼   ► here is how could have insulted me [TS]

00:46:54 ◼   ► better [TS]

00:46:55 ◼   ► well i know i don't like I don't mind [TS]

00:46:56 ◼   ► that but the whole like oh oh I've got a [TS]

00:46:58 ◼   ► big nose [TS]

00:46:59 ◼   ► you've got a big no-no I said wonderful [TS]

00:47:01 ◼   ► seeing that Jose for accent from the [TS]

00:47:03 ◼   ► play but it's wonderful sincere now [TS]

00:47:05 ◼   ► where where this guy comes up to me [TS]

00:47:06 ◼   ► wants to like he hurt he's the tough guy [TS]

00:47:08 ◼   ► cums you have a your nose is rather [TS]

00:47:10 ◼   ► large and in Cyrano composes a poem on [TS]

00:47:13 ◼   ► the fly while he kicks the guy's ass [TS]

00:47:15 ◼   ► with the sword about all the ways he [TS]

00:47:17 ◼   ► could have done that in a more clever [TS]

00:47:18 ◼   ► way [TS]

00:47:19 ◼   ► yeah this is what that reminds me up [TS]

00:47:20 ◼   ► because he literally does it line by [TS]

00:47:22 ◼   ► line in a different style [TS]

00:47:23 ◼   ► yeah that's exactly that's exactly what [TS]

00:47:25 ◼   ► I trying to a lot to make up a lot you [TS]

00:47:28 ◼   ► people hiding [TS]

00:47:30 ◼   ► well what what it is when people try and [TS]

00:47:31 ◼   ► when people try to accomplish a goal [TS]

00:47:35 ◼   ► especially when they when they write it [TS]

00:47:38 ◼   ► down but even when they say it to you [TS]

00:47:40 ◼   ► but when they're speaking to you you [TS]

00:47:42 ◼   ► know people trying to accomplish a goal [TS]

00:47:43 ◼   ► by employing by not staying straight [TS]

00:47:47 ◼   ► what they want but that why they're [TS]

00:47:49 ◼   ► dissatisfied with you and what they want [TS]

00:47:51 ◼   ► from you but they try to eat [TS]

00:47:53 ◼   ► don't use all these ploys like appeal to [TS]

00:47:56 ◼   ► a straw man and all the follow all those [TS]

00:47:58 ◼   ► sophistic fallacies they try to use [TS]

00:48:01 ◼   ► sophism on you where they are you know [TS]

00:48:04 ◼   ► they're trying to lead you down a way of [TS]

00:48:06 ◼   ► thinking and they're trying to make you [TS]

00:48:08 ◼   ► know is that my favorite one of these is [TS]

00:48:11 ◼   ► a friend of mine at many many years ago [TS]

00:48:12 ◼   ► we were sitting in a restaurant in San [TS]

00:48:14 ◼   ► Francisco actually there are three of us [TS]

00:48:16 ◼   ► and we were looking at pizza menu trying [TS]

00:48:18 ◼   ► to decide what kind of pizza again and [TS]

00:48:21 ◼   ► the menu said you get a 2 free toppings [TS]

00:48:25 ◼   ► on a large pizza and so I said I think [TS]

00:48:30 ◼   ► we should get pepperoni and mushroom and [TS]

00:48:33 ◼   ► my second friend said why don't like [TS]

00:48:35 ◼   ► mushrooms and then he said what about [TS]

00:48:38 ◼   ► pepperoni and green pepper and the third [TS]

00:48:40 ◼   ► guy said well I'm not really that into [TS]

00:48:42 ◼   ► pepperoni and then the second guy said [TS]

00:48:45 ◼   ► well let's just get a cheese pizza we [TS]

00:48:46 ◼   ► can all agree on cheese and I said well [TS]

00:48:50 ◼   ► we get two free toppings so why don't we [TS]

00:48:52 ◼   ► get you know let's get green pepper and [TS]

00:48:55 ◼   ► onion and then the third guy was like [TS]

00:48:57 ◼   ► well no I I like a little meat what [TS]

00:48:59 ◼   ► about sausage and onion and the second [TS]

00:49:02 ◼   ► guy says again [TS]

00:49:03 ◼   ► oh why don't we just get cheese and we [TS]

00:49:05 ◼   ► can all agree on cheese and we both kind [TS]

00:49:08 ◼   ► of looked at him and said well yeah [TS]

00:49:10 ◼   ► except for the two free toppings free [TS]

00:49:12 ◼   ► toppings so i'll add something I say [TS]

00:49:15 ◼   ► alright sausage and onion sounds good [TS]

00:49:17 ◼   ► and the other guy says okay sausage and [TS]

00:49:19 ◼   ► onion and the third guy now a little bit [TS]

00:49:21 ◼   ► upset goes well let's just get cheese we [TS]

00:49:23 ◼   ► can all agree on cheese and we looked at [TS]

00:49:27 ◼   ► him and said we just agreed on sausage [TS]

00:49:28 ◼   ► and onion and then it occurred to me and [TS]

00:49:32 ◼   ► I said to him [TS]

00:49:32 ◼   ► wait a minute do you want cheese pizza [TS]

00:49:34 ◼   ► is that what you're saying you want to [TS]

00:49:36 ◼   ► get cheese that is what you want and he [TS]

00:49:39 ◼   ► was like it's just that we can all agree [TS]

00:49:41 ◼   ► on cheese but clearly you're not and i [TS]

00:49:44 ◼   ► said we can't all agree on she's only [TS]

00:49:46 ◼   ► you are agreeing on jeans and it wasn't [TS]

00:49:49 ◼   ► even that he wanted that know it what it [TS]

00:49:51 ◼   ► was what it was was that he wanted that [TS]

00:49:54 ◼   ► she just wanted to cheese pizza [TS]

00:49:56 ◼   ► but he could not say it because he had [TS]

00:49:59 ◼   ► he had trained himself he'd grown up [TS]

00:50:01 ◼   ► thinking that like that trick works that [TS]

00:50:04 ◼   ► he was the problem solver that he was [TS]

00:50:06 ◼   ► the one who made everybody happy he was [TS]

00:50:10 ◼   ► the one that negotiated and what he had [TS]

00:50:13 ◼   ► learned to do is get his way [TS]

00:50:15 ◼   ► bye-bye negotiating this thing where he [TS]

00:50:19 ◼   ► ended up where he tried to make his [TS]

00:50:21 ◼   ► desire seem like the compromise position [TS]

00:50:23 ◼   ► between everybody else and he and this [TS]

00:50:27 ◼   ► guy had a reputation of being the nicest [TS]

00:50:30 ◼   ► guy you know [TS]

00:50:32 ◼   ► oh he's such a great guy you know never [TS]

00:50:34 ◼   ► huh but he but what he doesn't know he [TS]

00:50:37 ◼   ► gets his way by presenting it as the i [TS]

00:50:40 ◼   ► think it was so i think it is no no it's [TS]

00:50:42 ◼   ► a guy you don't know I but that but that [TS]

00:50:44 ◼   ► phrase we can all agree on cheese now [TS]

00:50:46 ◼   ► and you also you he despises when I say [TS]

00:50:48 ◼   ► we'll have to agree to disagree what he [TS]

00:50:50 ◼   ► say when I thank you [TS]

00:50:51 ◼   ► except i don't disagree agree to nothing [TS]

00:50:53 ◼   ► having created nothing but and so this I [TS]

00:50:56 ◼   ► made sure that this phrase we can all [TS]

00:50:59 ◼   ► agree on cheese became a byword became a [TS]

00:51:02 ◼   ► watchword for this tendency which is the [TS]

00:51:05 ◼   ► tendency of people to to seem like they [TS]

00:51:09 ◼   ► are being accommodated while they are [TS]

00:51:11 ◼   ► actually manipulating and it's a very [TS]

00:51:14 ◼   ► very common thing and I think a if you [TS]

00:51:16 ◼   ► look for it in life you'll see it all [TS]

00:51:18 ◼   ► the time and this email I got last night [TS]

00:51:20 ◼   ► from this person they were trying to [TS]

00:51:22 ◼   ► manipulate me all you know about trying [TS]

00:51:24 ◼   ► to manipulate me by presenting the by [TS]

00:51:27 ◼   ► presenting the art framing the argument [TS]

00:51:29 ◼   ► that we were having in a certain way [TS]

00:51:31 ◼   ► such that it seemed fait accompli right [TS]

00:51:34 ◼   ► that he had already framed the argument [TS]

00:51:36 ◼   ► and now here here was his elegant [TS]

00:51:39 ◼   ► solution for and what i was saying was [TS]

00:51:41 ◼   ► you are not in the position to frame the [TS]

00:51:44 ◼   ► argument it's not your argument to frame [TS]

00:51:46 ◼   ► so it is not your argument just [TS]

00:51:49 ◼   ► something you're acquainted with this [TS]

00:51:50 ◼   ► wasn't like some random random troll [TS]

00:51:52 ◼   ► with somebody now [TS]

00:51:53 ◼   ► yeah this isn't it's another business [TS]

00:51:54 ◼   ► situation where I'm doing business with [TS]

00:51:56 ◼   ► somebody and they are trying to and we [TS]

00:51:58 ◼   ► have a disagreement and then they all of [TS]

00:52:00 ◼   ► a sudden start using all this weird [TS]

00:52:02 ◼   ► creepy you know kind of like combining a [TS]

00:52:08 ◼   ► little bit of like [TS]

00:52:09 ◼   ► because I because people are so ashamed [TS]

00:52:11 ◼   ► when they get into a fight and so people [TS]

00:52:15 ◼   ► are manipulative people are great at at [TS]

00:52:19 ◼   ► turning that shame into an agent of to [TS]

00:52:24 ◼   ► accomplish their own goal is a is also a [TS]

00:52:27 ◼   ► foothold to self-doubt now you make the [TS]

00:52:29 ◼   ► first and start doubting themselves [TS]

00:52:30 ◼   ► exactly so they know you're ashamed [TS]

00:52:32 ◼   ► already that you're in a fight and they [TS]

00:52:34 ◼   ► just turned they just phrase it in such [TS]

00:52:36 ◼   ► a way that you doubt your position and [TS]

00:52:39 ◼   ► then they offer you an elegant solution [TS]

00:52:40 ◼   ► and in ninety-nine percent of the time [TS]

00:52:43 ◼   ► people are so relieved to have a [TS]

00:52:45 ◼   ► solution presented so relieved that the [TS]

00:52:47 ◼   ► other person is offering you know what [TS]

00:52:50 ◼   ► appears to be their hand in peace that [TS]

00:52:53 ◼   ► they don't notice that the argument has [TS]

00:52:55 ◼   ► been reframed and that the hand in peace [TS]

00:52:58 ◼   ► is actually just the other person's [TS]

00:52:59 ◼   ► position the other person is just [TS]

00:53:02 ◼   ► basically winning by presenting their [TS]

00:53:05 ◼   ► desire as this as like a compromising [TS]

00:53:08 ◼   ► that's a big business guy thing I think [TS]

00:53:10 ◼   ► that's you've talked before about the [TS]

00:53:12 ◼   ► whole thing we gotta deal with somebody [TS]

00:53:13 ◼   ► in authority and you know what I mean or [TS]

00:53:15 ◼   ► somebody with the power the money the [TS]

00:53:17 ◼   ► way I think that's a very common common [TS]

00:53:18 ◼   ► way and if you're somebody who has a [TS]

00:53:20 ◼   ► very strong personality you know if like [TS]

00:53:24 ◼   ► in your case you're able to say to that [TS]

00:53:25 ◼   ► person wait a minute you know I don't [TS]

00:53:28 ◼   ► know what you really want here but like [TS]

00:53:31 ◼   ► you say you're not in a position to [TS]

00:53:32 ◼   ► frame this if you're around a very [TS]

00:53:33 ◼   ► powerful person who is used to doing [TS]

00:53:34 ◼   ► that all day long and is good at it [TS]

00:53:36 ◼   ► it can be a hell of a Jedi mind trick [TS]

00:53:37 ◼   ► because then now you sound uppity you [TS]

00:53:40 ◼   ► sound like you sound like you're being [TS]

00:53:41 ◼   ► unreasonable [TS]

00:53:43 ◼   ► well that's that's the whole game [TS]

00:53:44 ◼   ► because if you say what know the other [TS]

00:53:46 ◼   ► person's like hey look i'm just trying [TS]

00:53:48 ◼   ► to I was trying to help you here i'm [TS]

00:53:50 ◼   ► just trying to solve this problem and [TS]

00:53:51 ◼   ► what you guys were really having them to [TS]

00:53:53 ◼   ► bring it back to the the cheese [TS]

00:53:54 ◼   ► agreement I think you are even at the at [TS]

00:53:56 ◼   ► the best and most big hard way having [TS]

00:53:58 ◼   ► two different conversations wasn't one [TS]

00:54:00 ◼   ► of them was a conversation about trying [TS]

00:54:02 ◼   ► to agree on the best utilitarian [TS]

00:54:04 ◼   ► solution for what we like on our pizza [TS]

00:54:06 ◼   ► and then the other guy want to be right [TS]

00:54:08 ◼   ► exactly the other guy wanted to win and [TS]

00:54:12 ◼   ► he he was so he got he and he was it and [TS]

00:54:16 ◼   ► what was great about this moment was [TS]

00:54:17 ◼   ► that he was so invested in his method [TS]

00:54:20 ◼   ► that his method was exposed [TS]

00:54:23 ◼   ► you know like he stuck to it just a [TS]

00:54:26 ◼   ► little bit too long until it was like [TS]

00:54:28 ◼   ► when there's only three of us here and [TS]

00:54:30 ◼   ► we are agreeing except for you who but I [TS]

00:54:34 ◼   ► think ninety-nine percent of the time [TS]

00:54:35 ◼   ► I've known this guy for years I still no [TS]

00:54:36 ◼   ► man i like it very much but he had he'd [TS]

00:54:39 ◼   ► been employing that method his whole [TS]

00:54:41 ◼   ► life and and most of the time he would [TS]

00:54:45 ◼   ► just kind of stick to his guns and other [TS]

00:54:47 ◼   ► people would be kind of talking around [TS]

00:54:48 ◼   ► and pretty soon it would seem like the [TS]

00:54:50 ◼   ► logical choice you know what yeah let's [TS]

00:54:52 ◼   ► just get cheese and if you're like me [TS]

00:54:53 ◼   ► just get tired of arguing like you just [TS]

00:54:55 ◼   ► like you know I i don't know i don't [TS]

00:54:57 ◼   ► have enough energy to continue continue [TS]

00:54:59 ◼   ► with this [TS]

00:54:59 ◼   ► yeah that's where I do i do not suffer [TS]

00:55:01 ◼   ► from that I know that's why i like about [TS]

00:55:03 ◼   ► the first hour of every show I do not [TS]

00:55:05 ◼   ► tired of arguing [TS]

00:55:06 ◼   ► well so here's the thing about the [TS]

00:55:07 ◼   ► sophistry is the pin and I have a slight [TS]

00:55:09 ◼   ► pivot here but the the sophistry works [TS]

00:55:11 ◼   ► great on other people who believe in [TS]

00:55:13 ◼   ► that sophistry right that where you can [TS]

00:55:15 ◼   ► play a certain kind of game with [TS]

00:55:16 ◼   ► somebody right but if the people who [TS]

00:55:19 ◼   ► agree to disagree [TS]

00:55:20 ◼   ► who if two people both subscribe [TS]

00:55:23 ◼   ► subscribe to the I let's agree to [TS]

00:55:25 ◼   ► disagree philosophy then but nothing [TS]

00:55:28 ◼   ► will ever be accomplished because they [TS]

00:55:29 ◼   ► will try and agree to disagree with each [TS]

00:55:31 ◼   ► other that will be that's there that's [TS]

00:55:34 ◼   ► the default and if one person says let's [TS]

00:55:36 ◼   ► agree to disagree the other person has [TS]

00:55:37 ◼   ► enough that cannot counter because they [TS]

00:55:39 ◼   ► already believe in agree to disagree [TS]

00:55:41 ◼   ► with the last argument you lost [TS]

00:55:43 ◼   ► well I mean I'll i lose arguments are [TS]

00:55:47 ◼   ► looking around looking for a date and [TS]

00:55:48 ◼   ► time haha not not an explanation but [TS]

00:55:51 ◼   ► well how often do you watch last time [TS]

00:55:53 ◼   ► you lost an argument here [TS]

00:55:55 ◼   ► I lose them all the time because I [TS]

00:55:57 ◼   ► because I lose the other person's it's [TS]

00:56:00 ◼   ► still not answering my castle to the [TS]

00:56:02 ◼   ► other person's like love like the other [TS]

00:56:05 ◼   ► person goes it gets so exasperated so [TS]

00:56:08 ◼   ► exhausted right [TS]

00:56:09 ◼   ► not because it's not really an argument [TS]

00:56:12 ◼   ► if you don't lose sometimes otherwise [TS]

00:56:14 ◼   ► it's just it's a it's a treatise right [TS]

00:56:17 ◼   ► oh let's see the last the last day the [TS]

00:56:21 ◼   ► last disagreement i had where both [TS]

00:56:22 ◼   ► parties knew how to talk about what I'm [TS]

00:56:24 ◼   ► talking about like you like the Emperor [TS]

00:56:27 ◼   ► and what am I thinking of here sometimes [TS]

00:56:29 ◼   ► a big showdown right is too well matched [TS]

00:56:31 ◼   ► with the Stars and watch lost but you [TS]

00:56:33 ◼   ► well matched swordsman come up against [TS]

00:56:35 ◼   ► each other in a fair [TS]

00:56:36 ◼   ► fight me and somebody's probably going [TS]

00:56:38 ◼   ► to lose [TS]

00:56:39 ◼   ► oh well this happens all the time I uh [TS]

00:56:41 ◼   ► John Hodgman has very strong feelings [TS]

00:56:43 ◼   ► about culture he's he's very durable and [TS]

00:56:47 ◼   ► that I do not share he believes certain [TS]

00:56:50 ◼   ► cultural things are are bulletproof and [TS]

00:56:53 ◼   ► I believe that they are riddled with [TS]

00:56:55 ◼   ► bullet holes these cultural things and [TS]

00:56:58 ◼   ► we will argue about them back and forth [TS]

00:57:00 ◼   ► and very often he makes a compelling [TS]

00:57:03 ◼   ► case where I have to say [TS]

00:57:05 ◼   ► mmm alright you don't that's because [TS]

00:57:07 ◼   ► he's gonna see if he can last longer [TS]

00:57:08 ◼   ► than you is one of the rare people who [TS]

00:57:10 ◼   ► can actually argue longer than you know [TS]

00:57:12 ◼   ► it isn't a case of arguing a longer or [TS]

00:57:14 ◼   ► stronger it is a case of of not being [TS]

00:57:18 ◼   ► here's the thing okay a lot of times [TS]

00:57:21 ◼   ► when people get into arguments with me [TS]

00:57:23 ◼   ► they feel overpowered because i have [TS]

00:57:27 ◼   ► because i replied to everything they say [TS]

00:57:29 ◼   ► I like I keep I keep the threat of the [TS]

00:57:30 ◼   ► argument going in my mind I don't get [TS]

00:57:32 ◼   ► distracted or sidetrack you don't feel [TS]

00:57:34 ◼   ► the need to settle it quickly in order [TS]

00:57:36 ◼   ► to like have it be easier on either of [TS]

00:57:38 ◼   ► you Yeah Yeah right I want to get the [TS]

00:57:40 ◼   ► key that's a really key thing for people [TS]

00:57:41 ◼   ► who don't know you well what I want to [TS]

00:57:43 ◼   ► do is find the truth and I want to get [TS]

00:57:46 ◼   ► to the truth of whatever the question is [TS]