Roderick on the Line

Ep. 16: "Cotton Candy Pink Poofy La-La"


00:00:00   hello hi John how are you hi Merlin [TS]

00:00:08   how's every little thing the way I'm [TS]

00:00:11   scratch that we start over [TS]

00:00:13   how's it going it's good why did you [TS]

00:00:16   scratch how's every little thing could [TS]

00:00:18   sounds like a lyric from a sixties [TS]

00:00:21   musical how's every little thing how [TS]

00:00:24   every little thing with you and I nada [TS]

00:00:29   jus you show tunes man i'll see being [TS]

00:00:34   shaped his men are really yeah my wife [TS]

00:00:36   constantia teens you know I came of age [TS]

00:00:39   in Seattle during the last great the [TS]

00:00:42   last great waning days of the true like [TS]

00:00:46   Renaissance of gay America when when you [TS]

00:00:50   came of age and the gay people still had [TS]

00:00:54   show tunes and drag and and Barbra [TS]

00:00:59   Streisand and all these things that that [TS]

00:01:01   they rallied around and sediment central [TS]

00:01:03   part that really meant something [TS]

00:01:06   it was a separate culture and now that's [TS]

00:01:08   all lost [TS]

00:01:10   no one cares about those things anymore [TS]

00:01:12   I don't think except for like 50 year [TS]

00:01:14   old former drag queens right i don't [TS]

00:01:18   think there's an ironic i don't see any [TS]

00:01:21   kind of hipster showtunes I happening [TS]

00:01:24   although now that we've set it yeah you [TS]

00:01:27   gotta get out it's not like it's not [TS]

00:01:29   like listening to soft sell or something [TS]

00:01:30   it's not something where they're sitting [TS]

00:01:31   around going to Hawaii NCAA this is but [TS]

00:01:34   there's a campus is certain campus that [TS]

00:01:36   I admire a certain campus if you are [TS]

00:01:41   using your penetrating vision to see the [TS]

00:01:43   campaigners the relative order to work [TS]

00:01:46   in the pink on a I demonstrating vision [TS]

00:01:50   I have an extremely penetrating vision [TS]

00:01:52   forum that is the way I a son you know [TS]

00:01:55   what let's talk about the Tea Party [TS]

00:01:56   alright well as disturbing know you're [TS]

00:01:59   seriously Iowa really whatever you're [TS]

00:02:02   about to talk about it on like a deal I [TS]

00:02:04   don't loathe you feel like particular [TS]

00:02:06   daughter of politics [TS]

00:02:08   it's that this is the problem you don't [TS]

00:02:10   get me started literally I want my [TS]

00:02:12   daughter [TS]

00:02:12   uh well look up really really just a [TS]

00:02:15   four-year-old daughter that that's what [TS]

00:02:17   you're gonna you're just very concerned [TS]

00:02:19   about the Santorum she's like these are [TS]

00:02:21   all results are very concerning to me [TS]

00:02:23   haha seems like its cues rather heavily [TS]

00:02:25   toward a very small group of people who [TS]

00:02:27   are really needy about being asked what [TS]

00:02:28   they think you know everybody stays [TS]

00:02:30   undecided because as soon as they become [TS]

00:02:32   decided nobody cares anymore you don't [TS]

00:02:34   spend a lot of time in Iowa it's a [TS]

00:02:36   fascinating state that because the [TS]

00:02:42   corner of the writers program or about [TS]

00:02:44   realize your tracks we know there are a [TS]

00:02:46   lot of like Iowa City you wouldn't [TS]

00:02:48   expect in the center of iowa iowa city [TS]

00:02:50   to be a progressive and beautiful little [TS]

00:02:54   College terrible thank you for asking [TS]

00:02:56   let me tell you a little story every [TS]

00:02:58   little thing about iowa's surprising [TS]

00:03:00   there's people everywhere in towns [TS]

00:03:03   you've never heard of well there's corn [TS]

00:03:05   is corn township corn district court [TS]

00:03:07   city corn corn corn writing program [TS]

00:03:10   sorry I thought little every little [TS]

00:03:12   thing i'm going to write that down [TS]

00:03:13   tell me tell me about sorry yeah you [TS]

00:03:15   what you're banned you're banned place [TS]

00:03:17   in Iowa a lot of Cedar Rapids is a very [TS]

00:03:19   interesting tonight in Iowa it's not [TS]

00:03:21   like it smells like the rapids that's a [TS]

00:03:24   real city so you're driving to cedar [TS]

00:03:26   rapids right which isn't on the way to [TS]

00:03:27   and Rabbi the kind of river [TS]

00:03:29   yeah there are Rapids there how would [TS]

00:03:31   you have cedar rapids unless unless you [TS]

00:03:33   add liquid trees [TS]

00:03:35   mmm to continue well anyway cedar rapids [TS]

00:03:39   i really wanted to go there just because [TS]

00:03:41   it's one of those towns that that isn't [TS]

00:03:43   on the way to anywhere it's not like the [TS]

00:03:46   the interstate doesn't go through there [TS]

00:03:47   you have to kind of make a little detour [TS]

00:03:49   and you get you driving to Cedar Rapids [TS]

00:03:51   and it's the entire town smells like [TS]

00:03:54   Captain Crunch cereal because they make [TS]

00:03:58   it there are they makes there's a [TS]

00:03:59   there's a there's a general mills cereal [TS]

00:04:03   close too close to a corn gotta stay [TS]

00:04:05   close to the corner yeah and the whole [TS]

00:04:07   town smells like crunch berries like I [TS]

00:04:09   obese i love that smells it was not so [TS]

00:04:11   why what's not to love [TS]

00:04:13   and I was like what you mean people live [TS]

00:04:15   in a town that's mostly contrarians all [TS]

00:04:17   year round [TS]

00:04:18   that should be a big theme in our [TS]

00:04:20   musical every little thing you get to [TS]

00:04:22   pick what kind of city you live in basic [TS]

00:04:24   happened and it should happen in cedar [TS]

00:04:26   rapids i met her in a town that smelled [TS]

00:04:29   like cheerios there are those are very [TS]

00:04:32   distinctive smell the whole town now [TS]

00:04:34   like when you go to busch gardens on if [TS]

00:04:35   you're into a bush gardens but it smells [TS]

00:04:37   intensely of hops because of the brewery [TS]

00:04:40   there and you know it first kind of [TS]

00:04:42   interesting but then it's really not [TS]

00:04:44   it's because really overbearing you [TS]

00:04:47   can't stop noticing you know it's like [TS]

00:04:49   living with a smoker [TS]

00:04:50   do you like eventually stopped noticing [TS]

00:04:51   the crunch do you think I know you've [TS]

00:04:57   been sleeping have even have been having [TS]

00:04:59   something I haven't slept in and I can't [TS]

00:05:01   believe I can't believe that you could [TS]

00:05:03   become so cynical you could become so in [TS]

00:05:06   newer to the smell of contraries that [TS]

00:05:08   you would ever not wake up and think oh [TS]

00:05:12   right it's so much a part of the culture [TS]

00:05:14   how could you ever stop really enjoying [TS]

00:05:16   that on a day-to-day basis right which [TS]

00:05:18   is why do you go to see so many local [TS]

00:05:20   bands [TS]

00:05:21   that's right the local bands are well I [TS]

00:05:24   used to the young people what they're [TS]

00:05:25   doing with music the new people the [TS]

00:05:27   beards the longer beards i'm not i'm [TS]

00:05:29   afraid that young people aren't doing [TS]

00:05:31   anything new with music is that is that [TS]

00:05:33   her radical to say up not only is that [TS]

00:05:37   true but yes I don't want to interrupt [TS]

00:05:39   you but I have a house I have something [TS]

00:05:41   on that but yes I i totally agree [TS]

00:05:43   I yeah I don't I mean I do go see young [TS]

00:05:46   bears all the time [TS]

00:05:48   Cassie question real quick before we [TS]

00:05:49   lose it how the reception was the [TS]

00:05:50   reception for a long winter show like in [TS]

00:05:52   cedar rapids we've never played cedar [TS]

00:05:55   rapids we we do quite well I'm sorry [TS]

00:05:58   that I wasn't there wasn't one of your [TS]

00:06:00   Charles Kuralt adventures we went on a [TS]

00:06:02   place that's right i was in a i was in a [TS]

00:06:04   camper with a with my faithful dog [TS]

00:06:07   Charlie and we're traveling her America [TS]

00:06:11   old Charlie it in the late fifties early [TS]

00:06:14   sixties and stealing panties all along [TS]

00:06:17   the way crunch berries they have [TS]

00:06:19   invented them yet and this is that smell [TS]

00:06:21   so great [TS]

00:06:21   no iowa city we do quite well in Canada [TS]

00:06:23   because iowa city is a place of [TS]

00:06:26   discernment and just look at the name [TS]

00:06:30   like creativity going on my whole city [TS]

00:06:32   that's right they get they get floods [TS]

00:06:34   they get tornadoes it's fascinating you [TS]

00:06:36   know I found from we did we discussed [TS]

00:06:38   Pittsburgh last week and it didn't cause [TS]

00:06:42   me to be thinking about Pittsburgh all [TS]

00:06:44   week [TS]

00:06:44   another great city there are a lot of [TS]

00:06:47   great cities in America it's a hell of [TS]

00:06:49   it it's a hell of a place [TS]

00:06:50   it really is yeah I never been to Iowa [TS]

00:06:52   town or Iowa Burke but I've always want [TS]

00:06:54   to go to Iowa City haha I i avoid making [TS]

00:06:59   or reading end of your lists partly [TS]

00:07:02   because I recall [TS]

00:07:04   well there's nothing bad about them and [TS]

00:07:06   interact cancer [TS]

00:07:07   well they're kind of cancer there's the [TS]

00:07:09   top ten carcinomas according to Rolling [TS]

00:07:12   Stone but you know I mean for me and [TS]

00:07:13   this is a blog things all it'll be short [TS]

00:07:15   but i think a lot of them like so many [TS]

00:07:17   ways God knows blogs or blog things are [TS]

00:07:19   typically short [TS]

00:07:20   hmm the headlines sometimes longer than [TS]

00:07:23   the post but you know me like I you know [TS]

00:07:25   you know me but I you know in our [TS]

00:07:28   interview we did many years ago you [TS]

00:07:29   talked about how the whole idea and [TS]

00:07:30   blogging is that have this little thing [TS]

00:07:32   that's the size of a can of tuna and [TS]

00:07:33   then you just surrounded with ads I [TS]

00:07:35   think today [TS]

00:07:36   like so many of the lists that we find [TS]

00:07:38   on the global Internet [TS]

00:07:40   I think they're largely about affiliate [TS]

00:07:41   links i think it's about linking amazon [TS]

00:07:43   and making five percent off what people [TS]

00:07:45   buy think it's what they do it you you [TS]

00:07:46   go you go and look it's either going to [TS]

00:07:48   be a list that's made into multiple [TS]

00:07:49   pages you have to click on this boring [TS]

00:07:51   so we'll be quick or you see it's a [TS]

00:07:52   whole bunch of the 500 top albums of the [TS]

00:07:54   year you will almost never see one of [TS]

00:07:56   those lists that doesn't have links to [TS]

00:07:58   somewhere where people make money and [TS]

00:08:00   that that's not that removes all [TS]

00:08:02   credibility but you know if the impetus [TS]

00:08:04   for what you decide to write it is based [TS]

00:08:06   on getting people to buy something then [TS]

00:08:08   you're really writing ad copy right [TS]

00:08:10   rather than producing pros [TS]

00:08:11   oh my god you have opened up a can of [TS]

00:08:14   worms that appeared to be a can of tuna [TS]

00:08:17   surrounded by ads food but which I'm [TS]

00:08:20   sorry which I write down for that people [TS]

00:08:21   are can of tuna / worms ads okay i don't [TS]

00:08:25   know i don't know what shorthand you use [TS]

00:08:27   on your I think we can't let the circle [TS]

00:08:29   back to this because I think we may have [TS]

00:08:30   found a hot spot and I think to be [TS]

00:08:31   honest with you that relates to the [TS]

00:08:33   point i was going to make which is that [TS]

00:08:34   I accidentally looked at a couple list [TS]

00:08:36   medalists of like what people thought of [TS]

00:08:39   as the best downs and i downloaded i [TS]

00:08:40   bought a couple on the itunes store [TS]

00:08:41   actually did hi there [TS]

00:08:43   well the tomb I got that I like okay [TS]

00:08:46   a well one of them was this band called [TS]

00:08:48   what is it a contingency plan [TS]

00:08:50   Intercontinental history [TS]

00:08:51   I don't know what they're called both of [TS]

00:08:53   those are great band names contingency [TS]

00:08:55   plan that's opening for intercontinental [TS]

00:08:57   history that Travis Morrison thing but [TS]

00:09:02   they were there good but I'm a crack guy [TS]

00:09:05   the other day on the Twitter about this [TS]

00:09:06   i mean so much [TS]

00:09:09   farewell continental it was one band any [TS]

00:09:12   other was being called yuck and and I [TS]

00:09:14   can already guess what you i can already [TS]

00:09:16   guess what you think about yoga if [TS]

00:09:17   you've ever heard them fine [TS]

00:09:19   farewell coming out like its patent [TS]

00:09:21   thing where and if you saw this but you [TS]

00:09:24   know how CDs and music in general have [TS]

00:09:26   gotten really really really loud [TS]

00:09:28   how does not a lot of dynamic range [TS]

00:09:29   anymore yeah that's like yeah that's one [TS]

00:09:32   of the the pet peeves of all them people [TS]

00:09:35   I work with [TS]

00:09:36   well not just the audio files but [TS]

00:09:38   certainly like recording engineers the [TS]

00:09:40   people who are recording engineers and [TS]

00:09:43   mastering engineers the people who are [TS]

00:09:44   responsible [TS]

00:09:45   yeah for me actually the master guys [TS]

00:09:47   alright the master is our the way to do [TS]

00:09:50   it [TS]

00:09:50   they all hate it they despise it you pop [TS]

00:09:52   album it looks like a rectangle if you [TS]

00:09:54   have it the way I more like this is [TS]

00:09:56   terrible but then they do it because [TS]

00:09:57   it's what people want [TS]

00:09:58   well yeah and if somebody puts it in and [TS]

00:10:01   it's not with the Nuremberg defense huh [TS]

00:10:03   I was just following waveforms right [TS]

00:10:05   yeah it's a I you know I don't [TS]

00:10:08   personally hate the Jews it's just what [TS]

00:10:10   people want right well you know you [TS]

00:10:12   gotta you gotta vote with your III one [TS]

00:10:15   of these I don't know it's pretty good [TS]

00:10:16   it's good pop songs but I had a crack [TS]

00:10:18   about this on Twitter yesterday on for [TS]

00:10:20   two days ago whatever but it was it's so [TS]

00:10:23   I mean I just can't believe how much pop [TS]

00:10:27   music you can actually hear the pitch [TS]

00:10:29   correction on [TS]

00:10:30   I don't know really well it's heavily we [TS]

00:10:34   don't talk about where they'll put it [TS]

00:10:36   right on maybe right on the key where [TS]

00:10:39   it's it really there's not even like [TS]

00:10:41   glissandos yes it sounds almost like [TS]

00:10:43   shares song you know believe right or [TS]

00:10:46   you there [TS]

00:10:47   it's it but it's that and combined with [TS]

00:10:50   an extraordinary amount i don't know [TS]

00:10:54   it's gated a huge amount of compression [TS]

00:10:56   and so that everybody sounds like their [TS]

00:10:58   voices exploding and perfect pitch all [TS]

00:11:00   the time and but this whole record it's [TS]

00:11:03   like every every instrument is too loud [TS]

00:11:04   and it's it for people who want to [TS]

00:11:07   listen to a certain kind of like really [TS]

00:11:08   loud in your headphones running around [TS]

00:11:10   music but like it's weird it doesn't [TS]

00:11:11   sound natural [TS]

00:11:12   it's you know what I mean it's so I [TS]

00:11:14   don't say overproduced so heavily [TS]

00:11:15   produced so good it's a good record like [TS]

00:11:17   it's fun i can see what people like it's [TS]

00:11:18   very poppy but I be you can dance to it [TS]

00:11:21   I I finance that probably dance I like a [TS]

00:11:23   beat but did you ever dance like no [TS]

00:11:25   one's watching something I do i do this [TS]

00:11:28   to increase joy division dance sometimes [TS]

00:11:30   so yeah [TS]

00:11:31   oh I just had a mental picture of you [TS]

00:11:33   doing that he and Kurdistan sort of AI [TS]

00:11:35   video of it that's the thing that the [TS]

00:11:37   thing that worries me [TS]

00:11:38   alright doesn't worry me it's just a it [TS]

00:11:41   fills my mind with with the ones and [TS]

00:11:45   zeroes instead of what should be filling [TS]

00:11:47   my mind which is sleep or or good [TS]

00:11:49   tidings but it fills my mind that this [TS]

00:11:52   this question bar on the pop music side [TS]

00:11:54   you know i i've always been a proponent [TS]

00:11:58   of the idea that all this stuff is just [TS]

00:12:01   the technology it's all in a way of [TS]

00:12:03   making music and people used to do you [TS]

00:12:05   remember the days when people with [TS]

00:12:06   Yammer on about gated snares and too [TS]

00:12:08   much reverb if you'll additionally [TS]

00:12:10   called that one of the things we're not [TS]

00:12:11   allowed to talk about yeah and it's one [TS]

00:12:13   of those things where it's just like you [TS]

00:12:14   know what it's just a technology it's [TS]

00:12:16   just it it's just a sound and no untrue [TS]

00:12:19   John there are no bad sounds well wait [TS]

00:12:20   but but but I I feel like pop music is [TS]

00:12:24   becoming I mean that the the generation [TS]

00:12:27   that we came from which was like embrace [TS]

00:12:29   the flaw celebrate the flaw celebrate [TS]

00:12:32   the human nervous that the kids now just [TS]

00:12:36   are like boring you know we can we can [TS]

00:12:39   make it perfect and it takes nothing to [TS]

00:12:42   do we just click click are our little [TS]

00:12:45   box and and all the waveforms are [TS]

00:12:47   straight lines and and instant [TS]

00:12:51   perfection but at the same time those [TS]

00:12:54   same kids are the compulsively unedited [TS]

00:13:00   bloggers right i mean that's that same [TS]

00:13:02   generation are the are the ones who are [TS]

00:13:04   blogging [TS]

00:13:06   or writing certainly tweeting with no [TS]

00:13:12   sense of punctuation no sense of [TS]

00:13:14   complete complete thought [TS]

00:13:17   no sense that once you've droned on for [TS]

00:13:20   five thousand words maybe you should go [TS]

00:13:22   read it one time and cut-out 2500 of [TS]

00:13:25   those words to make your thing [TS]

00:13:27   tighter to make your thing better so on [TS]

00:13:29   the one hand the culture is speeding [TS]

00:13:32   headlong into this like over sanitized [TS]

00:13:37   like oh like lack of lack of any sign of [TS]

00:13:43   human hands ever being late on the thing [TS]

00:13:45   just like robot music whoo [TS]

00:13:48   and on the other hand like the the [TS]

00:13:50   written culture it is this is this world [TS]

00:13:54   of people just like it's just it's just [TS]

00:13:57   spew culture right where there's no [TS]

00:13:59   there's they haven't done and done the [TS]

00:14:02   minimum amount of editing to make it [TS]

00:14:05   even seemed human so it's inhumane in [TS]

00:14:08   the other way where it's a it's so rude [TS]

00:14:11   and so scatological it's not even yeah [TS]

00:14:15   I'm trying event an analogy I I don't [TS]

00:14:18   completely disagree if I'd love to see [TS]

00:14:19   anybody write a five thousand word post [TS]

00:14:21   i don't think that happens anymore if I [TS]

00:14:23   got all the time u u9 like I'm not [TS]

00:14:26   reflected in all not a professional blog [TS]

00:14:28   that's the problem [TS]

00:14:30   what's a professional blog called Pro [TS]

00:14:32   blogging and go go anywhere where [TS]

00:14:33   somebody posts like this is so boring [TS]

00:14:35   that's 50 times a day when I just talked [TS]

00:14:37   about the internet on all right sorry [TS]

00:14:38   you're right you're right but I don't [TS]

00:14:39   know but not here think of it this way I [TS]

00:14:42   I kind of lament well as what's weird [TS]

00:14:45   itunes kinda brought this back but I [TS]

00:14:46   kind of lament the loss of the single as [TS]

00:14:49   an art form like either so many bands i [TS]

00:14:51   like that I the move comes to mind but [TS]

00:14:54   there are so many bands that or the [TS]

00:14:55   beatles like a lot of the beatles best [TS]

00:14:57   stuff never appeared on a proper english [TS]

00:14:59   album they got glommed together for some [TS]

00:15:01   American abortions but the there are no [TS]

00:15:04   yeah what I mean like yesterday and [TS]

00:15:06   today or whatever is really just a [TS]

00:15:09   collection of singles in Americans don't [TS]

00:15:10   deserve good things well and then what's [TS]

00:15:12   cool is when they put out the proper UK [TS]

00:15:13   version on CD then they made past [TS]

00:15:15   masters 12 which was fantastic but their [TS]

00:15:17   singles collection [TS]

00:15:18   you didn't like that you know are you [TS]

00:15:20   kidding i loved it but but we're talking [TS]

00:15:22   about the Beatles [TS]

00:15:23   well here's the thing we should reserve [TS]

00:15:25   that for our podcast and imagine Harlan [TS]

00:15:27   talk about the big notes i got our hands [TS]

00:15:30   on a card every week John Paul McCartney [TS]

00:15:33   the piers think like yesterday we will [TS]

00:15:37   listen into the cock rock station and [TS]

00:15:39   they played over the hills and far away [TS]

00:15:40   which i think is close to the point [TS]

00:15:44   where legs up on became less interesting [TS]

00:15:46   but they were still interesting and it's [TS]

00:15:48   a great song it was a physical graffiti [TS]

00:15:49   I think so [TS]

00:15:51   no it's good it's a good song but what's [TS]

00:15:52   funny is it's got dynamic range to it [TS]

00:15:55   like it's loud and quiet and at the end [TS]

00:15:57   i don't know if it isn't making armpit [TS]

00:16:00   might be electric piano but John Paul [TS]

00:16:01   Jones plays this like little quiet bit [TS]

00:16:04   at the end it fades out and then it [TS]

00:16:06   fades back in and the noise of our [TS]

00:16:09   kitchen I was like all this is the song [TS]

00:16:10   went off even 500 hundred times I was [TS]

00:16:12   like and then it comes back in like you [TS]

00:16:14   would never hear that today you would [TS]

00:16:16   never hear something like an errand was [TS]

00:16:19   the Beatles song that's got the long [TS]

00:16:20   fade out in the feedback in was not on [TS]

00:16:22   the walrus or strawberry fields anyone [TS]

00:16:23   know some get some [TS]

00:16:25   she's so heavy no it's not no it's not [TS]

00:16:28   another one another one of the this [TS]

00:16:29   anyway and then barreled down arrow now [TS]

00:16:34   while while while while around dude [TS]

00:16:37   skelter yeah yeah maybe you can do that [TS]

00:16:42   today because people would flip the [TS]

00:16:43   channel right and that's that's why I [TS]

00:16:45   think this way there are the fleet foxes [TS]

00:16:46   my to it because they're artists i never [TS]

00:16:50   heard the fleet foxes and it's just [TS]

00:16:52   these names are just crazy making me [TS]

00:16:54   anyway if I never got back to you [TS]

00:16:56   because you're important in this [TS]

00:16:57   conversation but think of it this way [TS]

00:16:58   with the whole blog racket [TS]

00:17:00   the thing is if you want to make any [TS]

00:17:01   money on a blog you have to post a lot [TS]

00:17:03   and often and get people to click [TS]

00:17:05   through and up and so the whole nature [TS]

00:17:07   of that is to produce these things that [TS]

00:17:10   aren't even singles which are producing [TS]

00:17:12   is the equivalent of look at first draft [TS]

00:17:14   of a jingle and money jingle based on [TS]

00:17:16   somebody else's song and you might bury [TS]

00:17:18   the fact that somebody else's long in a [TS]

00:17:20   link about you know after the jump as [TS]

00:17:22   they say or whatever like you know and [TS]

00:17:24   as the way i can read this stuff anymore [TS]

00:17:25   because it really it really has become [TS]

00:17:27   such a [TS]

00:17:29   let's not become such a factory of [TS]

00:17:32   unpalatable confections like to tell me [TS]

00:17:34   when I tell me how you how you do with [TS]

00:17:36   this because because your life I don't [TS]

00:17:38   have a blog imports everybody open this [TS]

00:17:40   but you are you are so internet you're [TS]

00:17:43   so wrapped up in the internet yeah [TS]

00:17:45   and yet II feel these moments i'm [TS]

00:17:47   certainly feeling right now where you [TS]

00:17:50   don't have to step back from the [TS]

00:17:52   internet very far at all to feel like uh [TS]

00:17:56   well this could consume my every waking [TS]

00:17:59   moment or maybe it's absolutely [TS]

00:18:05   meaningless like maybe none of this [TS]

00:18:07   matters at all and I I can't think of [TS]

00:18:11   them [TS]

00:18:12   I can't think of a precedent in human [TS]

00:18:15   life where there was something like this [TS]

00:18:17   that could be so all-encompassing and [TS]

00:18:20   yet potentially and then this is the [TS]

00:18:22   thing I think the jury's still out [TS]

00:18:24   potentially be like me really add up to [TS]

00:18:28   bacchus yeah but I mean the problem [TS]

00:18:31   there is that god this is so tedious the [TS]

00:18:34   problem there is that it's the internet [TS]

00:18:35   is not the problem that is like that's [TS]

00:18:38   not like that's kind of like like not [TS]

00:18:40   liking books or not liking music well I [TS]

00:18:44   agree with that in the medium it says [TS]

00:18:46   it's just a medium except it isn't just [TS]

00:18:48   a medium that books are not a thing that [TS]

00:18:51   you sit and used to talk to your friends [TS]

00:18:54   and keep in touch with your grandmother [TS]

00:18:56   and store all your photos and I mean oh [TS]

00:19:00   you're saying it's it's not taking on [TS]

00:19:02   the role of such a broader thing its it [TS]

00:19:04   people are putting their entire lives [TS]

00:19:06   nothing and spending their entire lives [TS]

00:19:08   on the thing I i don't know i'm just i'm [TS]

00:19:10   going through a really weird phase right [TS]

00:19:12   now where I'm feeling like because you [TS]

00:19:13   argue with people you gotta quit arguing [TS]

00:19:14   with you oh no you didn't argue with [TS]

00:19:17   people happy sleep have turkey one of [TS]

00:19:20   those things feel am I answer i'm so mad [TS]

00:19:23   right now I want to hear about this I [TS]

00:19:25   don't want to finish one thought that [TS]

00:19:26   hopefully will bring this together and [TS]

00:19:27   in some ways which is this is this is [TS]

00:19:29   what it means to be old what it means to [TS]

00:19:31   be old is that when you hear some band [TS]

00:19:34   and you go as I said a hundred times [TS]

00:19:36   oh they're pretty good well what that [TS]

00:19:38   really reminds me of his joy division [TS]

00:19:39   and then I go listen Unknown Pleasures I [TS]

00:19:40   i listen to this other man at all [TS]

00:19:42   really cool that's like a [TS]

00:19:43   fifth-generation Buzzcocks thing and [TS]

00:19:45   that makes you want to go listen to what [TS]

00:19:46   singles going steady or whatever and so [TS]

00:19:48   on and so on this makes you want to go [TS]

00:19:49   listen inevitably IM back with the same [TS]

00:19:52   35 albums like that like Pixies I always [TS]

00:19:55   end up so often going this just makes [TS]

00:19:57   you want to listen to come on pilgrim [TS]

00:19:58   sure our or you know or whatever the [TS]

00:20:01   kids don't have those that access to the [TS]

00:20:03   source material things change people [TS]

00:20:05   always talk about the kids I don't know [TS]

00:20:06   boy so what I'm saying is with the [TS]

00:20:07   internet and as you call it for me [TS]

00:20:09   that's about finding trusted sources [TS]

00:20:11   that you like and twitter is a great [TS]

00:20:12   example is that you don't have to see [TS]

00:20:13   well before they added that all the [TS]

00:20:15   bullshit with the promoted stuff you [TS]

00:20:17   don't have to say anything on twitter [TS]

00:20:18   you don't want to see unless you choose [TS]

00:20:19   to see it but I don't talk about so I'm [TS]

00:20:21   talking about zooming out a lot further [TS]

00:20:23   than that to a place where where the [TS]

00:20:27   question of what makes a valuable life [TS]

00:20:29   is like did you chop some wood today you [TS]

00:20:32   know yeah you can keep you can either [TS]

00:20:34   leave you literally literally do not [TS]

00:20:36   want to get me started on this because I [TS]

00:20:39   you know but I I this is what you do for [TS]

00:20:42   a living you that you don't have [TS]

00:20:44   anything to drink I'm a dick about that [TS]

00:20:45   point professionally that's kind of what [TS]

00:20:47   i do this that's why come here talk [TS]

00:20:49   about busman's holiday this is but I'm [TS]

00:20:51   karaoke government but you're right [TS]

00:20:52   you're right again I'd be remiss not [TS]

00:20:54   somebody who is this is right with two [TS]

00:20:55   points i went ahead and i did put a lot [TS]

00:20:58   of threads together here John using an [TS]

00:20:59   extraordinary amount of pitch correction [TS]

00:21:00   and compression I did record a version [TS]

00:21:03   of my karaoke jam so you can listen to [TS]

00:21:06   kenny rogers she believes angry and did [TS]

00:21:08   you use pitch correction and little bit [TS]

00:21:10   yeah I deliberately over-processed it to [TS]

00:21:12   make the point but it says she believes [TS]

00:21:13   in me by Kenny Rogers the other thing [TS]

00:21:15   depend on this banyak i love it it's [TS]

00:21:19   great but here's what's funny about that [TS]

00:21:21   is you listen to the instant the first [TS]

00:21:23   song comes on it gives me total would [TS]

00:21:25   because it sounds exactly like teenage [TS]

00:21:29   fanclub being covered by dinosaur like a [TS]

00:21:32   dinosaur sound with it like a teenage [TS]

00:21:35   like everything flows teenage fanclub [TS]

00:21:36   some you start listening to it and then [TS]

00:21:38   it sounds a little bit like Sonic Youth [TS]

00:21:40   it sounds a little bit like at the later [TS]

00:21:42   teenage fanclub know what's funny about [TS]

00:21:43   that was funny about that is each one of [TS]

00:21:45   those bands sounds like other bands [TS]

00:21:47   before them my teenage fanclub already [TS]

00:21:49   sounded a lot like sonic youth and [TS]

00:21:51   dinosaur so it's weird to me that like [TS]

00:21:53   you talk about recursion [TS]

00:21:55   I don't know if I'm gonna listen to this [TS]

00:21:56   album for six months I don't know if six [TS]

00:21:58   months from now still be listening this [TS]

00:21:59   because it is like a lot like a [TS]

00:22:01   highlights reel of the nineties for me [TS]

00:22:03   the late eighties and early nineties [TS]

00:22:05   which is my favorite period in music I [TS]

00:22:07   have to say when I mean that in the [TS]

00:22:08   mid-sixties but anyway the point being [TS]

00:22:11   like that's that's the weird thing [TS]

00:22:12   and this brings me round james joyce [TS]

00:22:14   which we should come back to but um [TS]

00:22:16   thats all i want to say about that now i [TS]

00:22:18   want to hear about what you're angry [TS]

00:22:19   about [TS]

00:22:20   I'm always interested in what's burning [TS]

00:22:22   you up how i had another note here so do [TS]

00:22:24   you think you're like Charles Kuralt in [TS]

00:22:25   bristol and to be honest I'm [TS]

00:22:27   overthinking [TS]

00:22:27   hmm i'll come back to that what are you [TS]

00:22:30   angry about John what so let's be in [TS]

00:22:31   your bonnet 00 i I'm I'm i think i'm [TS]

00:22:34   just angry at that at the at one of said [TS]

00:22:37   the fact that I feel like I I'm a [TS]

00:22:39   non-starter [TS]

00:22:41   now i I'm I'm not I'm not I'm not making [TS]

00:22:44   the transition I'm not I'm not I'm not [TS]

00:22:47   changing gears to get with the times I [TS]

00:22:50   feel like I am stick-in-the-mud not a [TS]

00:22:53   stick-in-the-mud exactly not exactly an [TS]

00:22:56   old fogey [TS]

00:22:57   no no I feel like a there there's a [TS]

00:22:59   frustrated contrarian yeah that's it [TS]

00:23:02   frustrated contrary and i feel like i [TS]

00:23:04   have been counter you know that the the [TS]

00:23:08   mistake you make when you see the [TS]

00:23:10   problem in everything is to is to is to [TS]

00:23:14   take solace in the in the contrary and [TS]

00:23:18   that is not a position where you're [TS]

00:23:20   you're you're making anything it's not [TS]

00:23:23   an active place [TS]

00:23:25   yes at each tip it's a passive place [TS]

00:23:27   it's a it's what teenagers do its what [TS]

00:23:28   pundits do its what if there's it's a [TS]

00:23:33   respectable place in modern life you [TS]

00:23:36   know people people love the guy that [TS]

00:23:38   sits on the side and and conventions [TS]

00:23:41   some people some people turn that into [TS]

00:23:43   art well can look at the Kings look at [TS]

00:23:47   the kinks think about think about the [TS]

00:23:49   the classic kinks arc starting [TS]

00:23:51   especially with something else going [TS]

00:23:54   through Muswell Hill billies like each [TS]

00:23:55   one of those records is in some ways a [TS]

00:23:58   get ready for two saat where it's a a [TS]

00:24:01   pastoral landscape Ian that's not make [TS]

00:24:04   it sound like penis you say that's Greek [TS]

00:24:05   gotta pae in it [TS]

00:24:07   I am trip tribute am pain am 22 to an [TS]

00:24:13   old British pastoral life that's what [TS]

00:24:16   village green Preservation Society [TS]

00:24:17   fucking means so they I'm just saying [TS]

00:24:20   and that guy was crazy to like you so [TS]

00:24:22   you could you could do your emerald city [TS]

00:24:24   preservation society because I need you [TS]

00:24:26   know what he had he had a brother that [TS]

00:24:28   he hated him and that he needed you know [TS]

00:24:31   he had a brother that he was that he [TS]

00:24:33   made all that music to really probably [TS]

00:24:36   just a board is going to provoke it just [TS]

00:24:39   to make his brother Matt like Oh check [TS]

00:24:41   it out i wrote another five great songs [TS]

00:24:43   today younger suckier I think paige i [TS]

00:24:47   think it was the tommy shaw of the Kings [TS]

00:24:49   well see him that or Tommy Shaw I [TS]

00:24:53   thought you were talking about Tommy [TS]

00:24:54   Stinson I think he's the tommy stinson [TS]

00:24:56   of the kinks [TS]

00:24:57   oh the one who keeps a rock and [TS]

00:24:58   absolutely absolutely get you know [TS]

00:25:00   that's good but I was a seat i'm shocked [TS]

00:25:01   as he wanted like Tommy Smith's and you [TS]

00:25:03   know it could be John do you think [TS]

00:25:04   everybody named Tommy the band wants to [TS]

00:25:06   rock more than their people are rockin M [TS]

00:25:08   or some of the other time is that's all [TS]

00:25:10   I got [TS]

00:25:11   well there's Tommy mm-hmm [TS]

00:25:15   I don't know hmm looks like ladies [TS]

00:25:18   harmony that's what makes the song [TS]

00:25:19   things I i think that it i think you for [TS]

00:25:22   a curmudgeon if a curmudgeon does not [TS]

00:25:25   have a nemesis then the world becomes [TS]

00:25:29   the convergence nemesis whereas if the [TS]

00:25:32   curmudgeon has a nemesis he can he can [TS]

00:25:35   focus all that energy on a on a solitary [TS]

00:25:39   point right and then and then the the [TS]

00:25:42   kind of the smoke clears that he can [TS]

00:25:44   look at the rest of the world with a [TS]

00:25:46   little bit more of a if not rosy then at [TS]

00:25:49   least like open-minded but some kind of [TS]

00:25:54   sense that like oh I everything I hate [TS]

00:25:56   IRA positive in this in my asshole [TS]

00:25:59   little brother or you know how unique [TS]

00:26:01   you know Jeannie antithesis need a smart [TS]

00:26:04   heatsink eating somewhere you need [TS]

00:26:06   somebody who's a worthy a worthy [TS]

00:26:08   opponent for you that can be your what [TS]

00:26:12   like your uh which called United [TS]

00:26:14   whipping boy but like that you know [TS]

00:26:16   Shirley Jackson lottery type situation [TS]

00:26:18   yeah but here's the problem but [TS]

00:26:20   and these days you get into an argument [TS]

00:26:22   with anybody you can argue with [TS]

00:26:24   everybody John and what do you get into [TS]

00:26:25   an argument everybody but you get into [TS]

00:26:27   an argument with somebody let's say for [TS]

00:26:29   instance and then a lot of it happens on [TS]

00:26:31   texting now which I know is a terrible [TS]

00:26:33   way to conduct an argument but that's it [TS]

00:26:35   you're not talking about Twitter you're [TS]

00:26:37   talking about your friends [TS]

00:26:38   oh yeah thanks to my friends and argued [TS]

00:26:40   with them because you're not talking [TS]

00:26:42   about just a random dude who like one [TS]

00:26:44   song your band-aid followed you and now [TS]

00:26:46   hates you for talking about Nazis no no [TS]

00:26:48   i'm talking about the people that occupy [TS]

00:26:49   my my daily life for your friends and I [TS]

00:26:52   get into arguments with because they are [TS]

00:26:55   idiots a lot of times and I'm and I'm [TS]

00:26:58   here to straighten them out and then we [TS]

00:27:00   get into a text argument and here's what [TS]

00:27:02   people do these days they send three or [TS]

00:27:04   four like whiny bitchy text back and [TS]

00:27:07   forth and then they go okay you know [TS]

00:27:09   what that's it I'm done you know what [TS]

00:27:12   you're talking about [TS]

00:27:13   wer wer were having an argument and [TS]

00:27:16   they're like no I'm done kinda wish i [TS]

00:27:19   could never these people are done will [TS]

00:27:22   be done or not done this isn't it this [TS]

00:27:24   isn't like this isn't a pop quiz that [TS]

00:27:26   you're just like over grabbing an [TS]

00:27:28   argument like reengage but nobody wants [TS]

00:27:31   to engage nobody wants to engage in in [TS]

00:27:34   that in a discourse that is anything [TS]

00:27:37   other than then constantly reassuring [TS]

00:27:41   constantly validating right you know [TS]

00:27:44   their their conversations with other [TS]

00:27:45   people and the world they everybody [TS]

00:27:47   structuring their world now so that the [TS]

00:27:49   news they get and the the texts that [TS]

00:27:52   they get from their friends are always [TS]

00:27:53   like you're the best two thumbs up on my [TS]

00:27:55   god let's get this back to 22 core [TS]

00:27:58   points which is the bad words and I [TS]

00:28:01   don't have beat this to death but the [TS]

00:28:02   fact that you're not gonna be able to [TS]

00:28:03   help them if they're just looking for [TS]

00:28:05   you to console them what you have to [TS]

00:28:06   offer than the penetration of your help [TS]

00:28:08   in a lot of ways it is to sports them to [TS]

00:28:10   stay with it maybe maybe to look up all [TS]

00:28:13   night texting to receive it [TS]

00:28:15   here's the problem i millions may not go [TS]

00:28:16   to bed we're not done I am really i'm up [TS]

00:28:19   a creek right now because I'm realizing [TS]

00:28:21   that their refusal to stay with it is [TS]

00:28:23   not only they are not only missing out [TS]

00:28:26   on the opportunity to have me straighten [TS]

00:28:29   them out but I'm feeling [TS]

00:28:32   I'm feeling the loneliness I'm feeling [TS]

00:28:35   the estrangement from from tribe from [TS]

00:28:38   having my primary way of engaging with [TS]

00:28:41   other people to be or you know [TS]

00:28:43   traditionally being like hey that thing [TS]

00:28:46   you just did was fucked up and here's [TS]

00:28:47   why and that's my primary way of of of [TS]

00:28:51   uh of talking to people and nobody wants [TS]

00:28:53   to hear any more bodies like out that's [TS]

00:28:55   it [TS]

00:28:55   united you said too much and then so I'm [TS]

00:28:58   i like I doors are closing all around me [TS]

00:29:00   nobody wants to be my friend anymore [TS]

00:29:02   now I find that very hard to believe it [TS]

00:29:04   won't be or at least I can't continue i [TS]

00:29:06   can't i can't maintain up a thread of [TS]

00:29:10   conversation that goes through the five [TS]

00:29:14   stages of conversate of argumentative [TS]

00:29:17   conversation [TS]

00:29:18   cool but George Ross thing which are you [TS]

00:29:21   know like first login bargaining you you [TS]

00:29:25   start off with a premise that you both [TS]

00:29:27   agree on the initial premise then you [TS]

00:29:29   find the thing that you that you [TS]

00:29:31   disagree about her when you inflate the [TS]

00:29:35   significance of your disagreement until [TS]

00:29:37   you really have an all-out war about [TS]

00:29:40   something and then you resort to ad [TS]

00:29:43   hominem attacks and then you realize [TS]

00:29:46   that you're fighting over something that [TS]

00:29:48   doesn't matter to either one of you and [TS]

00:29:50   you apologizing have rough sex you know [TS]

00:29:52   essentially you apologize and take the [TS]

00:29:55   other one out for coffee or whatever [TS]

00:29:56   she'll cover whatever or have some rough [TS]

00:29:59   sex but now you get up to you you start [TS]

00:30:03   you get up to the ad hominem attacks a [TS]

00:30:05   place which is the place I don't like to [TS]

00:30:08   go i'm not an ad hominem attacker [TS]

00:30:10   that's why I only mention that i only [TS]

00:30:12   mention that plateau because that's [TS]

00:30:14   where people that's where that's where [TS]

00:30:16   most you just worry that so many so many [TS]

00:30:17   of these cocksuckers are out there [TS]

00:30:19   working on at hominem attacks they start [TS]

00:30:21   they start with some ad hominem attacks [TS]

00:30:23   at me and all I can do is reply in kind [TS]

00:30:26   John I don't like i'm done i've done i [TS]

00:30:28   don't want to keep your head up [TS]

00:30:30   I don't like to give you notes but kind [TS]

00:30:31   just make one I do not want to become [TS]

00:30:34   part of the problem [TS]

00:30:35   I'm begging for notes right now is there [TS]

00:30:37   a chance the text messages are an [TS]

00:30:40   imperfect medium for the level of [TS]

00:30:41   discourse that you're looking for [TS]

00:30:44   the thing about one thing about text [TS]

00:30:47   messaging that wasn't really an answer [TS]

00:30:48   here's the problem favorite actors [TS]

00:30:52   thinking about sex myths and I'm great [TS]

00:30:54   at it [TS]

00:30:54   I am great at carrying on an argument [TS]

00:30:56   via text messaging and it's just that [TS]

00:30:59   other people can't keep up and it's so [TS]

00:31:02   infuriating [TS]

00:31:02   well you know John I i'll drop some [TS]

00:31:05   serious science on somebody in a text [TS]

00:31:07   message him and all they read is that I [TS]

00:31:09   said something about their mom my no no [TS]

00:31:13   I said something about your mommy [TS]

00:31:14   amazon resort to the admin stock up on [TS]

00:31:19   you know what you need i I don't want to [TS]

00:31:20   give you a note here but you need you [TS]

00:31:21   need you need fucking hate when people [TS]

00:31:23   talk about this movie you need your own [TS]

00:31:25   version of fight club you need to meet [TS]

00:31:27   with other assholes who in [TS]

00:31:29   boo-hoo-hoo-hoo can I do [TS]

00:31:31   well i don't know i mean apparently the [TS]

00:31:32   guy was faked the whole time [TS]

00:31:34   spoiler alert but here's the thing you [TS]

00:31:36   need if you here's the thing you are [TS]

00:31:38   essentially saying that people are [TS]

00:31:39   arguing wrong right now and so you need [TS]

00:31:41   to find somebody who agrees that you're [TS]

00:31:43   incredibly broken way of communicating [TS]

00:31:45   with people is not only acceptable but I [TS]

00:31:47   really the kind of thing that could be [TS]

00:31:48   very relaxing [TS]

00:31:49   so I i saw eventually a somnambulist [TS]

00:31:52   when you're done when you both literally [TS]

00:31:53   both of your batteries run out your [TS]

00:31:56   phones have died you can finally go to [TS]

00:31:57   sleep for a couple hours before the [TS]

00:31:58   elegance movies start this is what I'm [TS]

00:32:00   saying to you John is you need to seek [TS]

00:32:02   out somebody in an underground culture [TS]

00:32:04   I'm not saying go to the GoSee fleet [TS]

00:32:05   foxes or something they even underground [TS]

00:32:07   still not really here you're saying that [TS]

00:32:09   it's some kind of dominatrix culture [TS]

00:32:10   we're not at all not at all it's closer [TS]

00:32:13   to that stupid fight club thing you need [TS]

00:32:14   to meet with a lot of broken people who [TS]

00:32:16   buy things from ikea and then like to [TS]

00:32:18   hit each other in a basement [TS]

00:32:19   you need to find somebody who likes the [TS]

00:32:21   same thing that you do and and in time [TS]

00:32:24   in the fullness of time John I think you [TS]

00:32:26   need if I may say i'm not giving you a [TS]

00:32:27   note here i'm giving you anything that [TS]

00:32:29   you need to narrow your focus on 21 [TS]

00:32:31   nemesis not somebody you hate somebody [TS]

00:32:34   you grudgingly respect who you can text [TS]

00:32:37   with all night so that you can have [TS]

00:32:38   friends again [TS]

00:32:38   thought so there there are so many of [TS]

00:32:41   those are there a lot of people that i [TS]

00:32:42   grudgingly respect but the problem with [TS]

00:32:45   the problem with that is that there's [TS]

00:32:46   always this shit friction will know [TS]

00:32:50   hierarchies are so tenuous now like back [TS]

00:32:52   in the old days if if we lived in if [TS]

00:32:55   let's say we lived in cedar falls [TS]

00:32:58   Cedar Rapids let's say we lived in cedar [TS]

00:32:59   rapids in 1900 right at there would be [TS]

00:33:04   out there there's a limited number of [TS]

00:33:06   people in the town [TS]

00:33:07   nobody's moving anywhere you pick your [TS]

00:33:09   nemesis you pick your friends eat you [TS]

00:33:12   can you figure out what the hierarchy of [TS]

00:33:14   the unit of of the group is everybody's [TS]

00:33:19   got their everybody's on their maslow [TS]

00:33:22   trip or whatever and then you then you [TS]

00:33:25   hash it out on a daily basis but now [TS]

00:33:26   these hierarchies are all spread across [TS]

00:33:29   the internet so that if you engage with [TS]

00:33:33   somebody and they don't like your tone [TS]

00:33:35   or they don't like your they don't like [TS]

00:33:37   the cut of your jib or whatever they [TS]

00:33:39   just they don't have to turn their back [TS]

00:33:41   on you they just turn their focus three [TS]

00:33:44   degrees away from you and there are [TS]

00:33:46   10,000 other people who are buying for [TS]

00:33:49   their attention you know what I mean [TS]

00:33:50   this is the problem with with [TS]

00:33:52   particularly when you become more of a [TS]

00:33:55   public person yourself then you're in a [TS]

00:33:58   year in a realm where you're talking to [TS]

00:33:59   other public people and you all have [TS]

00:34:01   y'all have only to turn your attention [TS]

00:34:05   one or two degrees in any direction and [TS]

00:34:08   a whole new world opens up so nobody has [TS]

00:34:11   the nobody has the the skin in the game [TS]

00:34:14   enough to sit and really engage with [TS]

00:34:18   somebody who is who is counter them you [TS]

00:34:23   know what I mean I do [TS]

00:34:24   nobody wants to sit and have somebody [TS]

00:34:26   make points at their expense for a [TS]

00:34:29   prolonged period of time which is what [TS]

00:34:31   to having an argument with me is like [TS]

00:34:32   just sitting across from me why [TS]

00:34:35   numerically well what where I enumerate [TS]

00:34:38   all the reasons that they are flawed and [TS]

00:34:41   they have to just accept it if they have [TS]

00:34:44   a brain in their head [TS]

00:34:45   nobody wants to do that they just turned [TS]

00:34:47   their attention three degrees there are [TS]

00:34:49   10,000 other people on Twitter who are [TS]

00:34:50   there telling them that they're great [TS]

00:34:52   and that they love their stuff and that [TS]

00:34:54   there they can't wait for their new blog [TS]

00:34:56   post or their new book or whatever and [TS]

00:34:58   and something is lost i'm feeling the [TS]

00:35:01   loss [TS]

00:35:02   nobody's talking to me that way anymore [TS]

00:35:04   I mean even a few years ago you would [TS]

00:35:06   read reviews of your band that were some [TS]

00:35:08   of them still pretty scathing I mean [TS]

00:35:10   obviously I haven't put [TS]

00:35:11   the record in years but you get you [TS]

00:35:14   hardly even see intelligent criticism [TS]

00:35:18   intelligent negative criticism anymore [TS]

00:35:21   on the internet it's just sand stuff or [TS]

00:35:25   its or it's a it's like real base-level [TS]

00:35:31   takedown stuff but i but i'm not talking [TS]

00:35:33   about the internet now I'm talking about [TS]

00:35:34   my relationships with people in my own [TS]

00:35:36   town did this you did this used to work [TS]

00:35:38   for you i mean III just can't get away [TS]

00:35:40   from the problem with the texting III my [TS]

00:35:42   yellow I'll set that aside if you want i [TS]

00:35:45   cannot think of a worse way short shorts [TS]

00:35:48   like sending chess moves through the [TS]

00:35:50   mail i cannot think of a worse way to [TS]

00:35:52   try and have an intelligent conversation [TS]

00:35:53   with one of the problems might be who [TS]

00:35:56   that I have a mental illness no no let's [TS]

00:35:59   let's really set that aside cause i [TS]

00:36:01   really liked the show up let me you know [TS]

00:36:06   i don't i bergen goes you know what [TS]

00:36:08   asshole you're actually made of wood [TS]

00:36:10   I'm I'm trying he needs them for the act [TS]

00:36:15   I'm trying to say to myself don't carry [TS]

00:36:18   on arguments with people via text [TS]

00:36:20   messaging but then I do it anyway all [TS]

00:36:24   just there's a part of me that that that [TS]

00:36:27   likes to take relationships up to the [TS]

00:36:30   edge to see what they're made them i [TS]

00:36:35   think i think that's starting to become [TS]

00:36:36   clear [TS]

00:36:37   mhm and that isn't paying off for me [TS]

00:36:39   right now [TS]

00:36:40   yeah I true i just keep all these people [TS]

00:36:45   an ad that I I know or in familiar with [TS]

00:36:47   that you're having these texts arguments [TS]

00:36:48   with some of them yes some of them you [TS]

00:36:50   know in fact most of you probably know [TS]

00:36:52   not familiar with in someone you're [TS]

00:36:54   familiar with them whoo-hoo-hoo i texted [TS]

00:36:58   someone in california the other day [TS]

00:36:59   notnot the other day last night i texted [TS]

00:37:02   a friend in California and high [TS]

00:37:04   considered provoking an argument with [TS]

00:37:08   them just to see what happened and then [TS]

00:37:10   at the last minute I realized I was too [TS]

00:37:11   tired [TS]

00:37:12   m and so I just kept it at the level of [TS]

00:37:15   I kept our text exchange at the level of [TS]

00:37:17   fun banter exhaustion is really all that [TS]

00:37:20   keeps you civil that that knot or or an [TS]

00:37:24   argument with yourself [TS]

00:37:25   about about that you refuse to listen to [TS]

00:37:27   about what you could be doing wrong with [TS]

00:37:30   this process you've got a lot of John [TS]

00:37:31   this is a multi layer cake if I'm [TS]

00:37:33   missing my friend [TS]

00:37:34   it really is a you like cake here's what [TS]

00:37:36   I'm terrified of I am terrified of [TS]

00:37:39   niceness I do not want to become nice i [TS]

00:37:43   do not want to get indoctrinated into a [TS]

00:37:44   world where niceness is the currency and [TS]

00:37:48   yet i dont i I've never wanted to be [TS]

00:37:52   intentionally rude or mean not at all so [TS]

00:37:55   at and I right now I'm stuck in this [TS]

00:37:59   polarized the the poll from this from [TS]

00:38:03   the darkside to just you know to just [TS]

00:38:06   start to get bitter and mean and angry [TS]

00:38:09   for its own sake I I don't obviously I [TS]

00:38:14   don't want to go that direction but but [TS]

00:38:16   everything is so nice now everyone on [TS]

00:38:18   the other side is so cotton candy pink [TS]

00:38:21   poofy LA and I just can't relate to that [TS]

00:38:25   way of talking to each other not not if [TS]

00:38:27   not anybody that I care about you so I [TS]

00:38:31   don't know what to do I don't want to [TS]

00:38:32   become very thought of volunteering [TS]

00:38:35   somewhere i think if you were to go to a [TS]

00:38:37   local home for the agent for example [TS]

00:38:38   maybe a hospice are old people smell bad [TS]

00:38:41   exactly [TS]

00:38:42   it gives you all the more ammunition and [TS]

00:38:43   here's the thing they can't leave these [TS]

00:38:45   are people who think they're let me just [TS]

00:38:46   give you okay so hey might be honest I [TS]

00:38:49   well here's the thing they do you know [TS]

00:38:51   old man you think you know that's right [TS]

00:38:54   keep going up [TS]

00:38:55   here's the thing you know you're korea [TS]

00:38:57   korea that's that's your feather in your [TS]

00:39:01   come out of police action that was no [TS]

00:39:03   police action [TS]

00:39:04   well there's two things I like about [TS]

00:39:05   this John and the the United like either [TS]

00:39:07   of them here's the first one is they [TS]

00:39:09   don't text index is good this takes you [TS]

00:39:11   out of your comfort zone or discomfort [TS]

00:39:13   zone increasingly you're going to get in [TS]

00:39:15   there with people who literally smell [TS]

00:39:16   like pee and are very close to death [TS]

00:39:18   they're not going to be there not this [TS]

00:39:20   is going to force you into a new medium [TS]

00:39:21   now what you may or may not like I don't [TS]

00:39:23   know if this is going to make them [TS]

00:39:24   worthy adversary [TS]

00:39:26   I'm just saying you might find an [TS]

00:39:27   emphasis in a really deeply crippled man [TS]

00:39:29   with dementia partly because he can't [TS]

00:39:31   leave [TS]

00:39:32   he can't he can't not text you back hehe [TS]

00:39:35   literally is in a bed and mobile [TS]

00:39:37   sure and you know what he might be [TS]

00:39:39   spunky you can't get rid of the ruling [TS]

00:39:41   ideas it back in the sixties he hasn't [TS]

00:39:43   learned a new things since the johnson [TS]

00:39:45   administration fee for the waning days [TS]

00:39:46   you probably hated you before you were [TS]

00:39:47   born [TS]

00:39:48   Wow probably hate your dad think oh I [TS]

00:39:51   like that I like the sound of this [TS]

00:39:53   well I to start i think if i want to go [TS]

00:39:55   somewhere [TS]

00:39:56   yeah I do feel like there's room in my [TS]

00:39:58   life for selflessness I who mother's [TS]

00:40:01   room in all of our lives for selfless I [TS]

00:40:02   don't have a further enough place to set [TS]

00:40:04   that aside i'm going to write [TS]

00:40:05   selflessness [TS]

00:40:06   well let's know it would it would it [TS]

00:40:08   would help i think getting getting out [TS]

00:40:09   of your home to argue with people in a [TS]

00:40:11   different environment is not a bad start [TS]

00:40:14   you know if you were to go somewhere you [TS]

00:40:16   know I think part of it is your phone [TS]

00:40:17   John maybe you should get rid of your [TS]

00:40:18   phone and you thought about that i have [TS]

00:40:20   thought about it I maybe I should get [TS]

00:40:23   rid of money can change your texting [TS]

00:40:25   plan [TS]

00:40:27   oh you just make me so mad at AT&T also [TS]

00:40:31   other at them brother that is a can of [TS]

00:40:33   what was it worms no you know what i [TS]

00:40:35   have i have unlimited texting [TS]

00:40:37   grandfathered in from back when they [TS]

00:40:38   offered that I fucked up in last line [TS]

00:40:40   and they want they're always trying to [TS]

00:40:42   get me to do some new things so I lose [TS]

00:40:44   my unlimited texting [TS]

00:40:45   I but I i bought a service from them i [TS]

00:40:47   added something to my bill and so I lost [TS]

00:40:50   my grandfather house afrika high-quality [TS]

00:40:52   services and that's that's the thing [TS]

00:40:54   they want to do that they want to sucker [TS]

00:40:56   you every time this I learned this from [TS]

00:40:57   verizon when I was on them back in the [TS]

00:41:00   old days [TS]

00:41:01   who where you know they're like hey take [TS]

00:41:03   advantage of this great opportunity were [TS]

00:41:05   offering you I was like that's amazing [TS]

00:41:08   ok and they said ah but you no longer [TS]

00:41:11   have free weekends nights and friends [TS]

00:41:15   because you change your plan and so now [TS]

00:41:18   you're paying for all these things that [TS]

00:41:19   you used to this is some old plan you [TS]

00:41:22   know which it would be a verse to [TS]

00:41:23   hearing another suggestion [TS]

00:41:25   yeah no no I I wouldn't be averse okay i [TS]

00:41:28   think you'll like it because it involves [TS]

00:41:29   your phone work what if you call [TS]

00:41:31   companies that made products you don't [TS]

00:41:33   use and had a beef with them and [TS]

00:41:35   customer service just to get the ball [TS]

00:41:37   rolling [TS]

00:41:37   you know this is the thing that my [TS]

00:41:38   sister does to great effect love your [TS]

00:41:41   sister i wish i would have followed her [TS]

00:41:42   for eight months in college she loves [TS]

00:41:45   this is so cute i swear to you if you if [TS]

00:41:48   you have a problem with customer service [TS]

00:41:50   you can call my sister and ask her to [TS]

00:41:54   deal with it and she will happily [TS]

00:41:56   embrace your customer service from [TS]

00:41:59   Pete's like that we stuck on action line [TS]

00:42:00   is if you ever had was like on the local [TS]

00:42:02   news station if you ever need anything [TS]

00:42:04   done and that's the rule your sister [TS]

00:42:05   Phyllis here is she is more than happy [TS]

00:42:07   to wait that thing out and wear him down [TS]

00:42:09   oh yeah and and and she'll get a [TS]

00:42:10   customer service person online [TS]

00:42:12   uh-oh on the phone and you're only [TS]

00:42:16   hearing one side of the conversation and [TS]

00:42:18   you're thinking oh my god this person's [TS]

00:42:20   gonna hang up on her [TS]

00:42:21   my sister is bab solutely scorched-earth [TS]

00:42:24   right i mean she's just reading this [TS]

00:42:27   person the riot act with the biggest [TS]

00:42:29   smile on her face just having the time [TS]

00:42:30   of her life and a half an hour later I [TS]

00:42:33   swear to you the customer service person [TS]

00:42:37   is giving my sister her home number [TS]

00:42:39   they're making plans to go snowboarding [TS]

00:42:40   she has given my sister everything plus [TS]

00:42:44   that she asked for [TS]

00:42:46   I mean she wins every time I saw her do [TS]

00:42:49   this one time we were on a train in the [TS]

00:42:53   former czechoslovakia but in a Slovakian [TS]

00:42:56   portion we're in Slovakia and these [TS]

00:43:00   border guards get on the train so we're [TS]

00:43:02   just passing through slovakia where we [TS]

00:43:04   were it was a night train these border [TS]

00:43:07   guards get on the train and this is [TS]

00:43:08   early days they were very they were [TS]

00:43:12   still very like the Warsaw Pact stress [TS]

00:43:16   out stripes and they're coming through [TS]

00:43:18   the car and they're checking everybody's [TS]

00:43:20   visa and they get to our cabin and [TS]

00:43:22   they're like passports we have our [TS]

00:43:24   passports were fast asleep you know and [TS]

00:43:27   they're like your pet your your visas [TS]

00:43:28   are invalid you're gonna have to get off [TS]

00:43:31   the train at the next stop [TS]

00:43:33   and it's three o'clock in the morning [TS]

00:43:36   and we pull into this station and the [TS]

00:43:40   stations closed it's like some little [TS]

00:43:42   teeny village and my sister says we're [TS]

00:43:45   not getting off this train [TS]

00:43:47   you know I'm packing my bag i can fuck [TS]

00:43:49   are we going to do and she's like we're [TS]

00:43:50   not getting off this train and these [TS]

00:43:52   guys with machine guns are like no you [TS]

00:43:55   get off that you have to get off the [TS]

00:43:57   train you know they don't speak any [TS]

00:43:58   English [TS]

00:44:00   and she gets right up in their faces in [TS]

00:44:02   the in the you know in the hallway of [TS]

00:44:04   the sleeping car and she's like we're [TS]

00:44:07   not fucking getting off this train fuck [TS]

00:44:08   you [TS]

00:44:09   em and they're like you know it's [TS]

00:44:13   incredibly fierce stone-faced like Red [TS]

00:44:16   Army soldier types and you watch these [TS]

00:44:22   guys absolutely start to quiver in fear [TS]

00:44:25   as this blonde girl stands on their boot [TS]

00:44:29   that bhutto's gets right up in their [TS]

00:44:32   face and then she's like we're Americans [TS]

00:44:34   we're gonna call it a fucking air strike [TS]

00:44:36   on you if you if you if you been an [TS]

00:44:39   eyelash at me right now we are going on [TS]

00:44:41   to Prague we are going to take this up [TS]

00:44:44   with that you with your boss at the [TS]

00:44:45   Embassy we're gonna you know bluck [TS]

00:44:47   center with my bag and her bag like no [TS]

00:44:50   no it's ok it's alright [TS]

00:44:51   oh I'm fine to get off here and she's [TS]

00:44:53   like you're not moving and you're not [TS]

00:44:55   moving and the train cars full of people [TS]

00:44:57   you know gypsies piling into one girl go [TS]

00:45:00   off on these army guys and then an [TS]

00:45:02   officer comes and he speaks a little [TS]

00:45:05   english and she's in his face and pretty [TS]

00:45:07   soon I swear to you she makes this whole [TS]

00:45:11   thing like the guards are laughing she's [TS]

00:45:14   like poking them she's got nicknames [TS]

00:45:17   forum and you know that pretty soon [TS]

00:45:20   everybody on the train car is singing a [TS]

00:45:22   song together and I'm just stand there [TS]

00:45:24   like I don't know how she does it I do [TS]

00:45:27   not I do not understand it i watch it [TS]

00:45:29   happen right in front of me and I don't [TS]

00:45:31   know where she how she makes the turn [TS]

00:45:34   but suddenly everybody's not only like [TS]

00:45:37   how she does it because anybody can do [TS]

00:45:39   it but like how did she make it work [TS]

00:45:41   well it makes it work it and and the [TS]

00:45:43   train keeps moving and we end up with [TS]

00:45:45   like somebody comes in stamps our [TS]

00:45:47   passports and it's just like I don't [TS]

00:45:49   know how this I didn't even know there [TS]

00:45:51   was somebody on the train that could do [TS]

00:45:52   that when your north face experience is [TS]

00:45:55   north face right with the bag problem [TS]

00:45:57   when that end it was there any seeing [TS]

00:45:59   the songs [TS]

00:46:00   Oh No everybody was furious humiliated [TS]

00:46:03   and furious really really was to get you [TS]

00:46:05   out of there get the led out of the way [TS]

00:46:07   but they want to because i was on the [TS]

00:46:08   phone with corporate headquarters people [TS]

00:46:10   were telling me up and down your editor [TS]

00:46:12   the New York Times just couldn't [TS]

00:46:13   couldn't happen you know when I left [TS]

00:46:16   there was no like at pat on the back and [TS]

00:46:20   handshakes I you know I grab my booty [TS]

00:46:22   and and I I mean I definitely started [TS]

00:46:25   out the front door [TS]

00:46:26   triumph full your hair and your sister [TS]

00:46:29   never has to resort to just like a [TS]

00:46:31   google me [TS]

00:46:33   no no sense that it's really i would [TS]

00:46:36   love to have somebody like that in my [TS]

00:46:37   life every day but what do you learn [TS]

00:46:39   from that John is incredibly gifted I [TS]

00:46:40   don't know what it is that I don't and [TS]

00:46:42   there are you see people like it in the [TS]

00:46:44   world and the 10-minute the thing is the [TS]

00:46:46   10 minutes where she is right up in [TS]

00:46:48   their face is so excruciating even to [TS]

00:46:52   witness huh that you have to be prepared [TS]

00:46:57   to go all the way I think to come out [TS]

00:47:00   the other side and have everybody [TS]

00:47:02   befriends the the release of tension [TS]

00:47:04   when she when she smiles and goes right [TS]

00:47:08   buddy a like the release of tension is [TS]

00:47:11   so great at that moment that everybody's [TS]

00:47:13   just like oh my god I marry me so it is [TS]

00:47:17   that and with me it's I never I you know [TS]

00:47:20   I the it's I always try and use reason [TS]

00:47:25   long past the point of my sister has [TS]

00:47:27   abandoned reason entirely and is just [TS]

00:47:30   living in a completely emotional world [TS]

00:47:32   i'm still trying to reason with the [TS]

00:47:34   person and the other person's mind shut [TS]

00:47:38   you know the steel doors shot at a [TS]

00:47:40   certain point and all they're trying to [TS]

00:47:41   do is manage you get you out of there [TS]

00:47:43   store or get you away from them you know [TS]

00:47:46   so they're not hearing anything [TS]

00:47:48   listening to reason anymore they're not [TS]

00:47:49   trying to understand where you're coming [TS]

00:47:51   from [TS]

00:47:52   they're just like they're just like I [TS]

00:47:54   have to deal with this person have to [TS]

00:47:56   get them away from me i have to get them [TS]

00:47:57   out of here and by that point it's too [TS]

00:48:01   late to go to like fully moment full [TS]

00:48:05   nuclear emotion [TS]

00:48:07   uh like mushroom cloud because their [TS]

00:48:13   doors are already shut my sister goes [TS]

00:48:14   there right away like she gets right [TS]

00:48:17   inside these peoples world and they [TS]

00:48:19   can't shut the door behind her she's [TS]

00:48:20   already like she's already chewing on [TS]

00:48:23   their cerebral cortex [TS]

00:48:26   so is there is a chance that I mean [TS]

00:48:28   setting aside that you're not as let's [TS]

00:48:30   be honest not as gifted at the at the [TS]

00:48:31   set as your as your sister is true is it [TS]

00:48:34   partly that with things like typing on [TS]

00:48:36   on and costly phone you're not really [TS]

00:48:38   standing on anybody's boots you know [TS]

00:48:41   there's logic or emotion or any of the [TS]

00:48:44   contradictory things you apply to try [TS]

00:48:46   and get people to i will not climb up on [TS]

00:48:48   the front of someone's boots for two [TS]

00:48:50   reasons 1i don't have like a lot of [TS]

00:48:54   people have a belief system and they [TS]

00:48:57   will climb up on the front of somebody's [TS]

00:48:59   boot because they're because their [TS]

00:49:01   belief system is driving them and I [TS]

00:49:03   don't have a system of belief i have a [TS]

00:49:08   dive generalized beliefs i have beliefs [TS]

00:49:11   that are that are that are discrete from [TS]

00:49:14   one another but I don't have a system of [TS]

00:49:16   beliefs that will put me up on [TS]

00:49:18   somebody's boots and the other thing is [TS]

00:49:21   that in that situation fully half of my [TS]

00:49:24   brain is thinking while getting kicked [TS]

00:49:26   off this train at this tiny little [TS]

00:49:28   village in Slovakia is going to be a [TS]

00:49:31   real adventure book and so I'm like [TS]

00:49:36   gathering my bags with one eye out of [TS]

00:49:40   the train already like let's get kicked [TS]

00:49:41   off this train let's find out what [TS]

00:49:43   happens next what happens next is often [TS]

00:49:46   that you sleep outside of a train [TS]

00:49:48   station until the morning and deal with [TS]

00:49:50   some functionary and get on a new train [TS]

00:49:52   but that always seems to me more or [TS]

00:49:57   potentially more interesting or at least [TS]

00:49:59   as interesting as standing your ground [TS]

00:50:02   fighting to stay on this train I don't [TS]

00:50:05   care about this train I don't want to [TS]

00:50:06   stay on this train necessarily but my my [TS]

00:50:09   sister is one of those people who if you [TS]

00:50:12   say you have to get off this train her [TS]

00:50:14   first instinct is no i don't [TS]

00:50:17   and that isn't my first instinct [TS]

00:50:21   my first instinct is to say why oh I do [TS]

00:50:25   oh well let's make the best of it [TS]

00:50:28   mhm and that's you know and those people [TS]

00:50:31   whose first thing to say no i don't [TS]

00:50:34   well you have to go off the straightness [TS]

00:50:35   no i don't like those people are [TS]

00:50:38   incredibly frustrating and a lot of ways [TS]

00:50:40   of dealing with them in the world [TS]

00:50:42   she's really closer like somebody in the [TS]

00:50:43   CIA or or like interrogating somebody [TS]

00:50:46   well first you got to break them down [TS]

00:50:47   and then you got to show them a way out [TS]

00:50:49   I think that's the basis you know about [TS]

00:50:52   that i mean she and a lot of people a [TS]

00:50:55   lot of people that I come up against in [TS]

00:50:57   the world who have tremendous power who [TS]

00:50:59   you find that that's how they operate [TS]

00:51:02   that they're just like they they they [TS]

00:51:05   are not trying to in those moments there [TS]

00:51:08   just like here's what's going to happen [TS]

00:51:10   I'm gonna beat you and then I'm gonna [TS]

00:51:13   make then I'm gonna make you feel good [TS]

00:51:15   about it but first i have to be first [TS]

00:51:17   have to own you and beat you and then [TS]

00:51:21   i'm gonna i'm gonna give you a gonna [TS]

00:51:23   give you a pass a minute i'm gonna make [TS]

00:51:25   you fall in love with me at the end [TS]

00:51:27   stockholm syndrome yeah and for me like [TS]

00:51:30   meeting other people is never [TS]

00:51:33   interesting to me [TS]

00:51:34   what's interesting to me is being right [TS]

00:51:37   and if the other person is truly right [TS]

00:51:42   which is so infrequently the case but if [TS]

00:51:45   they are truly right there nothing gives [TS]

00:51:47   me greater happiness than to admit that [TS]

00:51:50   you want to adopt their world the [TS]

00:51:53   encounter encounter it so infrequently [TS]

00:51:55   it's very rare i think I'm maybe this [TS]

00:51:58   show can be a platform for you John [TS]

00:51:59   maybe our program could be a way for you [TS]

00:52:00   to meet some people who know who don't [TS]

00:52:03   know they want to be beaten into [TS]

00:52:04   emotional logical outcomes yet this [TS]

00:52:07   could this could be a chance maybe you [TS]

00:52:08   could maybe you could visit with people [TS]

00:52:10   maybe some people could text you and you [TS]

00:52:12   can just do a try on I like to meet [TS]

00:52:15   people who are right [TS]

00:52:17   it's so rare yeah it's just it's more of [TS]

00:52:21   a challenge for you right you want to be [TS]

00:52:23   you know what you want something on it [TS]

00:52:24   you don't have to get somebody's [TS]

00:52:25   punching above their weight right you [TS]

00:52:26   want somebody who you could you can [TS]

00:52:27   really really frustrate late into the [TS]

00:52:29   name [TS]

00:52:29   well I want somebody who want you want [TS]

00:52:32   to know why they're being frustrated [TS]

00:52:34   here's the thing I like people who are [TS]

00:52:36   right and then I like to show them the [TS]

00:52:39   other the up the other ways and went [TS]

00:52:41   into this meeting should be in the CIA a [TS]

00:52:44   metal is awaited about that for so long [TS]

00:52:46   I really wanted to be in the CIA and it [TS]

00:52:48   was only later when I realized that that [TS]

00:52:51   ninety-nine percent of the people in the [TS]

00:52:52   CIA you could just as easily be working [TS]

00:52:56   at verizon for how interesting that [TS]

00:52:58   there were kids you know like it it's [TS]

00:53:02   dull work the fact that the you know the [TS]

00:53:05   fact that the Intel that they're [TS]

00:53:07   processing is supposedly secret [TS]

00:53:10   mhm doesn't make it any less just that [TS]

00:53:13   they're sorting they're sorting through [TS]

00:53:16   boxes I've been shaped by that for [TS]

00:53:18   whatever 10 11 years now because I [TS]

00:53:19   remember after on 911 a talk to hear [TS]

00:53:22   that phrase HUMINT you know human [TS]

00:53:24   intelligence and and they're essentially [TS]

00:53:26   saying it's not any we don't really have [TS]

00:53:28   a problem of not having data it's just [TS]

00:53:30   we've got so much data that it's [TS]

00:53:32   difficult to find a pattern or you know [TS]

00:53:34   an outlier that would be useful [TS]

00:53:36   write this you can do much more to track [TS]

00:53:38   down well I mean if you have more data [TS]

00:53:39   than you have resources to filter and [TS]

00:53:42   act upon it [TS]

00:53:43   like that's a whole different kind of [TS]

00:53:45   problems your old problems don't go away [TS]

00:53:46   once you've got all that data you still [TS]

00:53:48   got it filed the paperwork and you still [TS]

00:53:49   got a torture the guy in the trailer or [TS]

00:53:51   whatever but right now you've also gotta [TS]

00:53:53   go through all of these thousands of [TS]

00:53:55   pages of people speaking in Arabic you [TS]

00:53:58   know where or whatever [TS]

00:54:00   well and just hoping to find that one [TS]

00:54:02   that one communication where somebody [TS]

00:54:05   says let's go blow up that thing who and [TS]

00:54:09   know what that never happens you know I [TS]

00:54:12   think I think of the premise of the CIA [TS]

00:54:14   is is like the like the same premise [TS]

00:54:19   that so many conspiracy theorists have [TS]

00:54:21   which is that there's somebody on top [TS]

00:54:23   that has a master plan who the CIA was [TS]

00:54:26   built to combat the Soviets [TS]

00:54:29   anime about the cold war isn't there you [TS]

00:54:32   there was somebody on top there was a [TS]

00:54:34   master plan but there's no master plan [TS]

00:54:35   anymore and it's like groups of four and [TS]

00:54:38   five guys who mostly mostly are [TS]

00:54:42   incompetent the CIA is an anachronism I [TS]

00:54:45   don't I i find very little about that [TS]

00:54:47   organization to respect anymore i think [TS]

00:54:49   this is I'm i used to have tremendous [TS]

00:54:51   respect for them to me like we're in [TS]

00:54:54   central america well all that tremendous [TS]

00:54:57   work they did in chile and Angola and [TS]

00:55:01   cola yeah for soccer stadiums that are [TS]

00:55:04   working on top of their game right up [TS]

00:55:07   there just the guys you find out some [TS]

00:55:09   some texts and mobile phone numbers of [TS]

00:55:10   people in the CIA they might they might [TS]

00:55:12   be really into it i am this is what I [TS]

00:55:15   find so concerning about the whole TSA [TS]

00:55:16   airport deal doesn't appreciate it talk [TS]

00:55:18   about this but I mean there's something [TS]

00:55:20   there's something emblematic of what's [TS]

00:55:22   wrong with so many things when you go [TS]

00:55:24   through there and you know there's [TS]

00:55:28   obviously is completely as people say [TS]

00:55:29   security theater you know it really it's [TS]

00:55:32   like going to a play it's just that the [TS]

00:55:33   actors are all like barely high school [TS]

00:55:35   graduates right and the script is it's [TS]

00:55:38   like it's like going to an improv play [TS]

00:55:40   where the script is it where it's really [TS]

00:55:45   like let's get two words from the [TS]

00:55:47   audience [TS]

00:55:47   ok first word you're in charge [TS]

00:55:51   second word a your charge know like [TS]

00:55:58   there's no script there's just there's [TS]

00:56:00   just these high school graduate high [TS]

00:56:02   school dropout you know it's it's it's [TS]

00:56:04   it's just it's like it's like tissue [TS]

00:56:06   paper on top of tissue paper the entire [TS]

00:56:07   thing is farcical down to the fact that [TS]

00:56:09   somebody noted the other day a friend of [TS]

00:56:11   mine mentioned that you know that they [TS]

00:56:12   shouldn't even have uniforms they're [TS]

00:56:14   bureaucrats the people who are searching [TS]

00:56:16   you the people who went through whatever [TS]

00:56:17   you know a couple weeks of training to [TS]

00:56:19   have that job god bless I'm glad they [TS]

00:56:20   got a job but then they're not even [TS]

00:56:23   there not police officers they're [TS]

00:56:25   bureaucrats they don't you know whatever [TS]

00:56:27   whatever you know ability they have to [TS]

00:56:29   do stuff to you is by making a call [TS]

00:56:31   there basically they're basically like [TS]

00:56:33   security guards and their of uniformed [TS]

00:56:35   security guards to they do I mean you [TS]

00:56:37   could buy a security guard uniform which [TS]

00:56:39   I mentioned you probably already have a [TS]

00:56:40   couple but well I don't get into it [TS]

00:56:42   again the armory problem let's see the [TS]

00:56:44   uniforms i have I could I could [TS]

00:56:45   masquerade as an Air Force colonel [TS]

00:56:48   okay here's the thing oh I wanna hear [TS]

00:56:50   this but here i want one thought is like [TS]

00:56:52   of all you distill all this down take [TS]

00:56:54   away everything [TS]

00:56:55   tick tick away take away the the [TS]

00:56:57   silliness of trying to chase around a [TS]

00:56:59   shoe bomber so now we can take our shoes [TS]

00:57:01   off the setting all that stuff like [TS]

00:57:02   setting aside the lady who has to take [TS]

00:57:04   off her colostomy bag setting aside like [TS]

00:57:06   yelling at the the old Indian lady who's [TS]

00:57:09   got the the water for her pills sending [TS]

00:57:11   all of that aside all you have to do is [TS]

00:57:13   see one thing happen to understand the [TS]

00:57:15   problem which is the special line for [TS]

00:57:18   people who work at the airport and so a [TS]

00:57:21   janitor walks by with a giant giant [TS]

00:57:24   garbage can [TS]

00:57:25   waves and walks through that's all you [TS]

00:57:28   need to know that is all you need to [TS]

00:57:30   know about the entire thing is like [TS]

00:57:31   there's Gus who's making nine dollars in [TS]

00:57:33   forty cents an hour walking by with [TS]

00:57:36   basically what probably like a probably [TS]

00:57:39   like a 10 now be more intense probably a [TS]

00:57:41   hundred gallon like a giant you mean [TS]

00:57:43   those huge things for trash [TS]

00:57:45   yeah you're looking way to understand [TS]

00:57:47   why you're taking off my shoes because [TS]

00:57:49   you think i have one ounce of explosives [TS]

00:57:51   in my shoe and there's a guy's going [TS]

00:57:53   through that could have blue boy in [TS]

00:57:55   there like you've got to be kidding me [TS]

00:57:57   but that's all you need to know well [TS]

00:57:59   general i want brought a box cutter [TS]

00:58:01   accidentally brought a box cutter on a [TS]

00:58:03   plane and discovered it only when she [TS]

00:58:06   opened up her laptop casing I don't know [TS]

00:58:07   why my mom carries a box cutter she [TS]

00:58:08   might be a sleeper cell but she didn't [TS]

00:58:10   realize it until she opened it she [TS]

00:58:11   completely flipped the switch post-911 [TS]

00:58:13   app so this is like very soon after 911 [TS]

00:58:16   when when you know when there was all [TS]

00:58:18   just a complete craziness and down but [TS]

00:58:21   you know I I mean come on [TS]

00:58:23   like I had an unbroken stretch like [TS]

00:58:25   three years where I never set off the [TS]

00:58:26   beep and then one time I forgot to take [TS]

00:58:28   a pen out of my pocket and they touch my [TS]

00:58:30   nads [TS]

00:58:30   no I got to grab and I got the overall [TS]

00:58:33   anymore Colin addresses my dad's well [TS]

00:58:36   that's you know I'm sorry I'm sorry hit [TS]

00:58:39   that it's sad but it goes on and then [TS]

00:58:42   keep talking to you it's real creepy [TS]

00:58:43   it's like one of those apologetic rapist [TS]

00:58:44   they just as they always say generals [TS]

00:58:47   are always fighting the last war all [TS]

00:58:49   brought the problem World War [TS]

00:58:51   on its imagino line problem yeah imagine [TS]

00:58:54   it was bad as I thought [TS]

00:58:55   imagine how long is pretty bad right it [TS]

00:58:57   was pretty bad it was they spend a lot [TS]

00:58:59   of money it was very very costly [TS]

00:59:02   yeah but it was like putting up a really [TS]

00:59:03   really nice chain link fence with a lot [TS]

00:59:06   of gates right well I was like putting [TS]

00:59:08   up a really really nice really like [TS]

00:59:11   concrete wall between you and your [TS]

00:59:15   next-door neighbor but then not putting [TS]

00:59:18   up not continuing the wall around your [TS]

00:59:20   property [TS]

00:59:21   it's like doing it but justice I just [TS]

00:59:23   the side of your house that faces the [TS]

00:59:24   street [TS]

00:59:25   yeah just ended at the lot line and so [TS]

00:59:27   your neighbor just walked around and no [TS]

00:59:30   no it was a mistake to lock around the [TS]

00:59:32   right side and up and then came up from [TS]

00:59:35   behind or like all the guns were pointed [TS]

00:59:37   in one direction it's the at the thing [TS]

00:59:40   is if the terrorists want to hurt [TS]

00:59:41   Americans they're not going to do it on [TS]

00:59:43   an airplane again there's so many other [TS]

00:59:46   ways you could do is the problem and [TS]

00:59:48   this is the problem i mean you can go in [TS]

00:59:50   you know what I gets a John I'll take a [TS]

00:59:51   couple things I was wrong about and i [TS]

00:59:53   thought i was a real future at the [TS]

00:59:55   company futurist I thought he had this [TS]

00:59:57   right [TS]

00:59:57   sorry i was going to say Sloan [TS]

00:59:57   sorry i was going to say Sloan [TS]

01:00:00   take a minute here I thought buffets and [TS]

01:00:07   salad bars would go away i cannot [TS]

01:00:08   believe we still have buffets and salad [TS]

01:00:10   bars i thought by facing salad bars were [TS]

01:00:12   pretty bad idea for you could just go by [TS]

01:00:15   with an aerosol spray anthrax on setting [TS]

01:00:17   aside that you're gonna frequently find [TS]

01:00:19   grubs and screws in the salad that's [TS]

01:00:21   just happened that's the thing i'm just [TS]

01:00:22   going to happen because that's that's [TS]

01:00:23   you know careless whatever you should [TS]

01:00:24   find grubs in the salad that just [TS]

01:00:26   happens that's made drug scrubs and [TS]

01:00:28   screws your fine machine parts in your [TS]

01:00:29   food show you how i used to work at a [TS]

01:00:32   pizza parlor and we found little [TS]

01:00:34   caterpillars in the alternative capital [TS]

01:00:36   letters all the time also [TS]

01:00:38   so here's the thing is you go up there [TS]

01:00:40   and you see you go somewhere like in [TS]

01:00:41   Tallahassee god bless it [TS]

01:00:43   chinese buffet right home now no he's [TS]

01:00:46   not backing down he's healthy [TS]

01:00:48   well all the presents LOL boy you want [TS]

01:00:52   to talk about the difficulty of [TS]

01:00:53   economics and culture all the Chinese [TS]

01:00:55   food restaurant eventually had to become [TS]

01:00:57   buffets it was the only way they could [TS]

01:00:58   beat six dollars you come in boom all [TS]

01:01:00   you want snuggles you can eat [TS]

01:01:02   yeah mm you're saying that had to go [TS]

01:01:05   away but it didn't show me what you [TS]

01:01:07   remember the anthrax remember that [TS]

01:01:08   people are afraid to open their mail [TS]

01:01:10   okay yeah and like a like Johnny type [TS]

01:01:12   he's can walk in there like stick his [TS]

01:01:15   hands into the tater tots anytime he [TS]

01:01:16   wants and really buddy diabetes [TS]

01:01:22   was the other thing you were wrong about [TS]

01:01:26   [Music] [TS]