00: “Suit of Vomit”
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hello hello how are you
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well how are you against timely oh no
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it's uh it's ok I was early
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mm um do you remember that time we went
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out and got a stake when I was in
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seattle when you're pretty nice not
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nothing really really nice place but
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they so we sat outside and we have a
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steak remember that we got to guess what
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about our friends
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yeah I mean we have gotten a lot of
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maybe we should cover that but yeah I do
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remember this one particular time
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that's a circle back don't talk more
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about steaks but i think that's the
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first time I ever heard some money order
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and order Arnold Palmer is it possible
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that that was the first time i heard
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that in that it was you that did that it
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was almost certainly me and I guess it's
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possible it was the first time I Arnold
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Palmer's have really exploded in
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popularity lately
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this is this is the reason I'm late you
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know you're having a morning Arnold
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Palmer I got into a terrible habit you
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know how can be with the abusing any
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yeah it starts out simple enough yeah I
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started out the gateway drug for me was
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the snapple the lemon tea snapple iced
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it was terrible stuff the those people
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are like abortion clinic bombers yes
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very much like nazi abortion diversity
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build the abortion clinic they let the
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abortions happen then they bombed the
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mhm getting going both ways east and
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west mmm yeah 911 was a conspiracy
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yeah it was faked what's was a circus
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are back on that ok I i started the
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gateway drug for me this is quick the
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the first thing was the I don't know why
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I did I looked at the back
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I'm trying to avoid the hfcs just high
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fructose corn syrup
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I think it's bad for you you know it and
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I don't think sugar is good for you but
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dunno y like I'm I'm on board with that
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particular trend that I i suspect that
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might be liberal health food store
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overprotective mom
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really I you know I'm various I'm very
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suspicious of all of those you think
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that once you think that's one of those
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fake things i don't know i mean where I
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mean after it's been processed so much
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that all that's left in it is like
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hydrocarbons right so if you believe
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that processing is inherently bad but
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that seems like a spiritual argument
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right the thing itself isn't isn't any
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worse for you than sugar cane the the
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molecules aren't any worse
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sure about that I don't know but it just
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seems like it you know it seems like
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it's one of those things where it's just
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the argument is that it's been processed
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so much that like that
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healthful spirits have been taken out of
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it the natural sprites the natural elves
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of Health have been chased out and all
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that's left is something like is some
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Hitler crystal that neck sends you
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marching into pasture gone and nothing
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nothing's left the elf new and very old
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hustlers right they moved out it's all
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although let me tell you who i was to
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find a stockpile of very old hustlers or
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else hostlers I would horse certainly
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definitely help hustlers got PBS scan
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some people some people also cards i
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hustle elves they lock up the rainbow
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your watch that star hustler remember
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star hustler hit members only jacket
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zipped all the way up and he's very
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excited about about the sky maybe didn't
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get that you have in florida i think you
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had different PBS than we did we
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integrate different everything now
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here's the problem is i don't know if
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it's the high the fuck is the corner
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this Europe I don't even know where the
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problem isn't just called fuck tous that
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I fucked us corn syrup made from the
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best stuff on earth
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oh i thought i was in the clear but
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here's the thing i went there today I
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don't know why I try to get a coffee I
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didn't have time to get a coffee i want
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to have something to pump me up so you
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keep up with you and I went in they were
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out of the lemon tea so I got I thought
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of you and I picked up this is the fun
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part for this it's arnold palmer light
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half-and-half arnold palmer brain
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and light and big red with white little
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white letters on a half and half iced
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tea lemonade it's light didn't have
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anything but the light just like the
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CFL's where they were saving ten percent
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by making a 90 watt bulb 91 bulb that
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needs to be disposed of in a hazmat
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container because it's full of mercury
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and um but so you're telling me that
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Arnold Palmer drink now is branded
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arnold palmer drink and it's in a can
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yeah this is a 20-ounce bottle its
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slender and tall
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it's kinda like almost like a smart
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water form factor it's kinda and it's
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got a kind of a not a tripartite what
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would you call it a trip tik of him on
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the front of me as a young guy with when
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there's a bunch of other snapshots on
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here to prove that this is arnold palmer
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to to sell this product to a generation
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of kids who have never heard of Arnold
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Palmer's view encounter in arnold palmer
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product that only has four pictures of
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Arnold Palmer on it turn it away it's
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literally hitler poison is this is john
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66 pictures of golfing legend arnold
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palmer but the one they chose for the
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main one of the of the trick is is him
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looking a little like you can't decide
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whether he's confused or mad he looks it
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looks a little bit all see he's just
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staring off in one direction but yeah
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this is your great by one dollar but uh
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you don't you don't worry that much
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about what you put in your body and you
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know that's not true i doing i do and in
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fact Arnold Palmer's have always for me
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been an opportunity to to craft a drink
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out of a mixed set of ingredients like
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app for me an Arnold Palmer is a is an
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entry-level fruity pleaser and a free
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did you make up that phrase fruity
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yeah you use it a lot use it on tour
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you'd mention a light yet the keys in an
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interview you did you invent that term
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just a curiosity
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well no but it was invented for me by my
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long-time bartender who's name is Jeff
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sparks who now owns his own bar here in
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Seattle called the dexter in hayes and I
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went into his bar
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after I quit drinking and I sat down at
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the bar and I was like well I quit
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no way yeah and he said that that bodes
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ill for my business and I said yeah well
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hit you a cherry juice and soda
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I'm spreading the suffering around you
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know like I have to quit drinking so
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fuck you and and he said well let's see
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i we need to make you a drink and he you
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know he made what it what would be what
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what would be a suicide or a graveyard
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except out of mixed fruit juice instead
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about a pop so cranberry orange
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grapefruit little bit of the maraschino
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cherry water you know like you guys
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interested you guys open for them once I
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think maraschino cherry water yeah they
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were they were amazing but and they were
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like they were ahead of this whole
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Tweety rock thing yes but anyway so he
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called it a fruity pleaser and and it
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and it's been fruity please forever
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since and I thinking and most of the
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bars in seattle now if you say fruity
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pleaser to the bartender
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yeah and they know you're talking about
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I think you just first of all well
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second of all I i like the fact that you
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have introduced some entropy to this
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it's going to be a different drink every
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time I like that but first of all I
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think you found your version of the
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Arnold Palmer I think you need to brand
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this I don't know how you I don't know
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you could pass the FDA and putting that
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out but I'm telling you
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fruity pleaser right and it's different
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every time we don't know it might be
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good might be bad they don't use might
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be from concentrate
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that's the nature of the fruity pleaser
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and that's the thing sometimes you go
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into an ice bar you order fruity pleaser
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and the fruit juice has that kind of
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vaguely moldy tastes like it's been
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sitting in a it's been sitting in the
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gun or sitting in the freezer for too
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long you know what I mean like you go
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into a bar sometimes your fruit was
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always in those way if you worked in
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bars more than me but yeah I think ever
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being this white plastic containers that
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nobody really rinses very well and it's
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a mixer let's be honest it's a mixture
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that's gonna go with usually barbarro
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well well well brands somebody's
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somebody's going to get us something
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something whiskey
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and coke or something right the cook
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comes out of the shooter you got a gun
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what you call that we call that a gun
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you got the kind but i don't think a lot
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of care by and large your typical
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Seattle bar I don't want to project I
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don't get a lot of care going into
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renting this what you want a lot of
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hours it'll take 40 please are in some
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ways the juice actually like orange
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juice cranberry juice is also coming out
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of the gun so it's going past some moldy
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coca-cola molecules on its way not to
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make this all about molecules but it's
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going to pass these models is all about
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Hitler and but the thing is in seattle
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and portland and other super irritating
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American communities you can I mean now
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sometimes i go into a bar in order
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fruity pleaser and the bartender sits
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and hand squeezes five limes two
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grapefruits up a pineapple watermelon
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like he makes me a drink that by all
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rights should cost twenty-five dollars
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because of the the care that's gone into
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it and it's some of those fruity
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pleasers are the best drinks ever had
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but so I think of an Arnold Palmer as in
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that class of like this is something
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that somebody's gonna make for you out
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of what they have at the bar
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notnot something in a can but i love
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this i love this fruity please are in a
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can idea that's a yea I think it's
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well this is the thing I mean you're
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getting older I why I assume that I
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assume you're getting heavier
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no it's getting harder and harder for
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you to move 0 2 i'm like great violence
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Brando lying on the backseat of a car
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being driven by michael jackson and
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Elizabeth Taylor is sitting in the
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passenger seat and I'm yelling stop it
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cannot be fried chicken Michaels
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Michaels just in tears I don't want to
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go to the jack-in-the-box again sergeant
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fried chicken
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I but it's gonna get hard to move is
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what i'm saying so you're going to
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extend your brand in in wholesome ways
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and ways that scale well you know you
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wanna enterprise-class beverage that you
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can put your name somebody like you
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you have you have a lot of what's the
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word haha infamies the wrong word famous
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certainly the wrong word but people have
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heard of you
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they might be annoyed
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probably thirsty notoriety John do you
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go into stores do you realize how many
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drinks there are in stores now there's
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so many drinks and so I can't stand it I
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can't stand it i walked down those drink
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Isles and I just feel like it's just one
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more way I'm being assaulted
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I'm being honest I'm being I'm being
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sodomized by America
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yeah like real i like yeah okay sorry
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you remember going to your moms that I
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don't mean to keep interrupting you know
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i got it i know it in to get it
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yeah but did you remember going to the
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grocery store to get beer back in the
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old days when when when at least one I
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drank beer there were seven kinds of
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yeah now there's 750 kinds of beer and I
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don't know you got artist artists and no
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one's got mexican with tomatoes in it
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there are different sizes now are
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disabled artists and authors i know
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that's a big in portland artisanal bread
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are saying we're yeah you making all
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kinds of you know small small small cask
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small cask artisanal beers
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yeah go ahead i think that you know I
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think the canonical pronunciation of
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that word is artisanal but artists anal
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I don't know it residents were announced
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canonical just transferred canonical
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coming up could non-melanoma goal
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setting aside that I have no idea who
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needs that much selection
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I mean let's be honest what here's the
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corn problem the corn problem is there's
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a lot of fucking corn much much of which
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has been subsidized by the fucking
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government there's all kinds of course a
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whole documentary about the corn is corn
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together children of the corn sure her
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sure you got but here's the thing
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it'sit's like the whole economy falling
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apart thing three trillion dollars had
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to find a home and so it went into a lot
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of bullshit and they didn't check
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people's credit so nobody paid it back
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and now that's why nobody is to have a
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house anymore and that's the thing
00:12:55
◼
►
there's all that corns gotta land
00:12:56
◼
►
somewhere and I got imagine that that is
00:12:59
◼
►
a big part of the h f c+ night I went to
00:13:05
◼
►
the safeway I gotta get milk for my
00:13:06
◼
►
daughter we're out of milk
00:13:07
◼
►
I gotta go I go to the safeway there are
00:13:10
◼
►
probably seven or eight of those big
00:13:14
◼
►
alpert like doors basically was like six
00:13:16
◼
►
doors of milk right it's completely
00:13:19
◼
►
baffling that there's like there's
00:13:20
◼
►
always like so a chocolate
00:13:22
◼
►
there's no lactose lactose-free and like
00:13:26
◼
►
you but you know what they did not have
00:13:27
◼
►
any they had like two things of 2% milk
00:13:30
◼
►
and the entire thing I think that's a
00:13:32
◼
►
failure i think if you've got that much
00:13:34
◼
►
chocolate soymilk and you cannot have a
00:13:35
◼
►
gallon of 2% milk for a beautiful little
00:13:38
◼
►
something is wrong oh my god you just
00:13:40
◼
►
prosecutor did I well I think as I feel
00:13:44
◼
►
like I I feel like most of that milk is
00:13:46
◼
►
adulterated milk somehow it it's been
00:13:49
◼
►
the molecules are all have been
00:13:52
◼
►
adulterated big chunks of Hitler now
00:13:55
◼
►
throughout throughout the overall the
00:13:57
◼
►
freezer cases like a lot of that Hitler
00:14:00
◼
►
is subsidized by the government official
00:14:01
◼
►
government still is propping up the
00:14:03
◼
►
moment while we having the French into
00:14:05
◼
►
it because i know they are your favorite
00:14:06
◼
►
topic the French the French but I get
00:14:12
◼
►
mad as it but as a bachelor for many
00:14:14
◼
►
years I ate almost exclusively in
00:14:17
◼
►
restaurants and almost exclusively in
00:14:20
◼
►
restaurants where I knew at least one
00:14:21
◼
►
girl who was a waitress that that is
00:14:25
◼
►
elegant and and so I didn't know where
00:14:28
◼
►
my food came from my food came from
00:14:30
◼
►
pretty girls is what I thought and and
00:14:33
◼
►
in that sense I'm like my daughter my
00:14:36
◼
►
five or six month old daughter who also
00:14:38
◼
►
thinks that food comes from pretty girls
00:14:40
◼
►
but now that i have now that i have a a
00:14:43
◼
►
little girl I have mouths to feed
00:14:45
◼
►
I'm going to supermarkets i'm going to
00:14:47
◼
►
grocery stores which is a thing I never
00:14:49
◼
►
used to i never used to do I think I
00:14:51
◼
►
probably when I was like george herbert
00:14:53
◼
►
walker bush i had not been in a grocery
00:14:55
◼
►
store since before world war two with
00:14:58
◼
►
the zebra thing
00:14:59
◼
►
yeah how much of the gallon milk I don't
00:15:01
◼
►
know fifteen cents fifty dollars
00:15:04
◼
►
I don't know now i'm going to grocery
00:15:07
◼
►
stores all the time i'm looking at i'm
00:15:08
◼
►
looking at these walls of products i'm
00:15:10
◼
►
trying to sort through them in order to
00:15:12
◼
►
find enough nutrition to keep my family
00:15:16
◼
►
going and also enough just raw
00:15:19
◼
►
carbohydrates to fill me with
00:15:21
◼
►
self-loathing those are my two the two
00:15:25
◼
►
things i look for
00:15:26
◼
►
here's some food for my family
00:15:28
◼
►
and then I need 8,000 calories of
00:15:31
◼
►
carbohydrates mix with cheese food is
00:15:34
◼
►
called a pairing a pairing yeah right
00:15:36
◼
►
you're gonna get a whole flight of shame
00:15:38
◼
►
you played them together let's get the
00:15:40
◼
►
plating you played it you played him
00:15:42
◼
►
that and and so I I'm actually very
00:15:44
◼
►
concerned about like buying things that
00:15:46
◼
►
are nutritious and not adulterated
00:15:49
◼
►
because i'm trying to feed people that I
00:15:51
◼
►
care about and I look at these products
00:15:55
◼
►
and and I i spend i'm not joking i spend
00:15:59
◼
►
hours standing in the aisles
00:16:02
◼
►
I'm that guy with the with the shopping
00:16:04
◼
►
cart blocking the aisle reading the
00:16:06
◼
►
ingredients on the back of some can of
00:16:08
◼
►
of multimix and wondering what the hell
00:16:11
◼
►
it is and how it is going to interact
00:16:14
◼
►
with me and and and yet the farmers
00:16:18
◼
►
market model where I would actually
00:16:20
◼
►
either a grow my own food or B goes
00:16:23
◼
►
somewhere some hippies are selling food
00:16:25
◼
►
that they grew that's just so much
00:16:27
◼
►
trouble because you gotta go a lot you
00:16:31
◼
►
go a lot and then you get all that you
00:16:32
◼
►
get all this scale only talk about the
00:16:35
◼
►
hippies all alone now that and started
00:16:38
◼
►
to have stuff i want to cook don't have
00:16:39
◼
►
a tail I think if you need to buy plants
00:16:43
◼
►
you might as well pick up some salmon
00:16:45
◼
►
but like I'm going to drive to the mall
00:16:47
◼
►
and like you seen out there where you
00:16:49
◼
►
live you probably got like freestanding
00:16:51
◼
►
hippie chords they're hippies all over i
00:16:54
◼
►
have to shoot him out of my garden
00:16:55
◼
►
yeah yeah I put copper down that keeps
00:16:58
◼
►
him from coming into the house put on
00:16:59
◼
►
some copper tape no copper the boric
00:17:02
◼
►
acid that's a good idea i've been
00:17:04
◼
►
playing Slayer job you can put up a job
00:17:08
◼
►
that'll keep me away huh really help
00:17:10
◼
►
wanted sign exactly haha alright it's
00:17:14
◼
►
hippie kryptonite
00:17:15
◼
►
we're never gonna solve this problem and
00:17:18
◼
►
it's just going to keep making me angry
00:17:20
◼
►
but by the hey what you're saying is so
00:17:22
◼
►
setting aside the like this may be your
00:17:25
◼
►
only chance for two minutes to yourself
00:17:26
◼
►
today to go to the store like there is a
00:17:29
◼
►
genuine component of like you you're
00:17:31
◼
►
just going to the store a lot i'm going
00:17:33
◼
►
to the store a lot yeah i mean for us it
00:17:35
◼
►
was like the weekend you can get diapers
00:17:39
◼
►
no amazon.com and stuff like that but
00:17:41
◼
►
like you're just always buying something
00:17:43
◼
►
and then you get sick and you gotta get
00:17:46
◼
►
something for that and then you know
00:17:47
◼
►
what I mean it just feels like there's
00:17:48
◼
►
always and the clothes clothes do you
00:17:52
◼
►
close your child I I'm a proponent of
00:17:56
◼
►
the naked baby philosophy of 11 when my
00:18:00
◼
►
child comes in the door it's usually
00:18:02
◼
►
dressed in some kind of pink outfit that
00:18:05
◼
►
and it was then the child was dressed in
00:18:07
◼
►
this pink outfit by by unscrupulous
00:18:10
◼
►
others people usually women that I gotta
00:18:14
◼
►
keep girl with taste but that the baby
00:18:17
◼
►
has encountered in the course of her day
00:18:19
◼
►
like she passes through the hands of
00:18:21
◼
►
many women and i think in every every
00:18:23
◼
►
time a woman touches her she also
00:18:25
◼
►
changes her clothes for each additional
00:18:28
◼
►
minute touches her a little pink his
00:18:30
◼
►
head something something happens a hat
00:18:32
◼
►
goes on or some socks so the baby comes
00:18:34
◼
►
in the door the first thing i do is
00:18:36
◼
►
strip off all of this like a that all
00:18:39
◼
►
this accoutrement that she's acquired in
00:18:41
◼
►
the course of the day and reduce her
00:18:43
◼
►
down to her natural state which is baby
00:18:45
◼
►
in diaper and then and then the there's
00:18:50
◼
►
a little bit of time where she and I
00:18:51
◼
►
just because that's um that's how I sit
00:18:55
◼
►
around the house most of the day just
00:18:56
◼
►
baby and diaper
00:18:57
◼
►
that's my my preferred clothing also
00:18:59
◼
►
makes it easier on you
00:19:01
◼
►
yeah so then there's the two of us and
00:19:03
◼
►
we get a we share a wet wipe and then we
00:19:08
◼
►
reset that's a big part of attachment
00:19:10
◼
►
parenting wife sharing our attachment
00:19:14
◼
►
that's right i read about that who we
00:19:17
◼
►
did a version of that was extreme I mean
00:19:20
◼
►
I have a pal good pal he and his lady
00:19:23
◼
►
did the thing where you like don't even
00:19:25
◼
►
set the kid down for like 90 days you
00:19:28
◼
►
just keep passing it like a potato or
00:19:30
◼
►
something I don't know maybe I'm nothing
00:19:31
◼
►
like a hamburger and met some kind of
00:19:33
◼
►
hook but it's because i think the nature
00:19:35
◼
►
of it is that the child is not allowed
00:19:37
◼
►
to touch the ground
00:19:38
◼
►
Wow otherwise it'll just be broken
00:19:40
◼
►
emotionally mhm
00:19:41
◼
►
it needs to trust that it will always be
00:19:43
◼
►
hanging somewhere we might have done
00:19:45
◼
►
something like that but it was
00:19:47
◼
►
we never put the baby down because how
00:19:49
◼
►
can you put a cute little
00:19:50
◼
►
maybe down look at that there's so many
00:19:55
◼
►
ways gratefully so many ways gratefully
00:19:58
◼
►
that my daughter is way more like
00:20:00
◼
►
Madeline than me but uh one way we got a
00:20:03
◼
►
lot in common is that the pants thing
00:20:05
◼
►
the pants come off and neither one of
00:20:08
◼
►
you once pants on pants are a problem
00:20:10
◼
►
yeah and I cannot keep the kid and pants
00:20:12
◼
►
just look at the homebody she likes
00:20:14
◼
►
hanging out at home she can make police
00:20:15
◼
►
stuff no I mean she runs around like you
00:20:17
◼
►
know she goes to school and she has tons
00:20:18
◼
►
of running around like throughout the
00:20:19
◼
►
morning but I'm hanging out with her
00:20:21
◼
►
it's very much hardcore like were
00:20:23
◼
►
pretending that we're in a Pixar movie
00:20:24
◼
►
or several pixar movies and that's
00:20:26
◼
►
that's like what we do but it's very
00:20:28
◼
►
often mutually pantsless you know I'm
00:20:32
◼
►
watched a couple of those pixar movies
00:20:33
◼
►
and i know some of the people that work
00:20:35
◼
►
there and I have to say I think they
00:20:37
◼
►
have a lot of a lot of pants on their
00:20:40
◼
►
yeah they're they're mandated by the
00:20:42
◼
►
Hollywood blue laws
00:20:44
◼
►
this is a very very old joke / bit but
00:20:49
◼
►
you know their own they know kind of our
00:20:51
◼
►
own now by the disney and people have
00:20:53
◼
►
talked for years about why some cartoon
00:20:55
◼
►
I don't do this is a bit but it's true
00:20:56
◼
►
so why do some cartoon characters have
00:20:58
◼
►
pants and not others what is waiting
00:20:59
◼
►
requires goofy have pants blue doesn't
00:21:01
◼
►
have pants why is it that hardly any
00:21:04
◼
►
Donald Duck no pins Donald Duck no
00:21:06
◼
►
panties got a shirt and a hat but he's
00:21:07
◼
►
got no pants a lot of pigs don't have
00:21:10
◼
►
pants and I think that's a practical
00:21:12
◼
►
thing I think that's hard to draw and
00:21:13
◼
►
the curly tail is cute but I don't know
00:21:16
◼
►
if not even registering for my daughter
00:21:18
◼
►
she's covered as she spends her whole
00:21:19
◼
►
day surrounded by people in pants who
00:21:21
◼
►
are pushing pants agenda
00:21:23
◼
►
yeah and when she comes home you know
00:21:25
◼
►
it's a lot like the homeschooling thing
00:21:26
◼
►
we try to make him crazy with the Bible
00:21:28
◼
►
I think when she comes home she needs to
00:21:29
◼
►
have a comfortable place where pants are
00:21:31
◼
►
not only optional they're really frowned
00:21:33
◼
►
right here here Don Ramon behind you
00:21:36
◼
►
under percent and I begin with me let it
00:21:38
◼
►
begin with me
00:21:39
◼
►
that's how I feel I've met your little
00:21:41
◼
►
girl and and and i'm i'm sad to say i
00:21:44
◼
►
have not met her enough times but the
00:21:47
◼
►
that the time I've spent with her she's
00:21:49
◼
►
a magical creature and why you would why
00:21:53
◼
►
you would imprison that child in pants I
00:21:54
◼
►
I can't begin to understand why somebody
00:21:57
◼
►
would do that you want to know who like
00:21:58
◼
►
to cover up magic with pants
00:22:00
◼
►
Hitler how many times I was gonna see a
00:22:03
◼
►
bottomless Nazi and I'll and big pants
00:22:07
◼
►
jodhpurs shot hoppers well you know what
00:22:12
◼
►
what what what the baby has done for me
00:22:14
◼
►
I I'm an inveterate thrift shop visitor
00:22:18
◼
►
as you know you and I have been to many
00:22:20
◼
►
thrift shops in San Francisco together i
00:22:22
◼
►
would describe you as a a serious thrift
00:22:26
◼
►
shop but not a connoisseur like no I
00:22:29
◼
►
means more than that thank you you might
00:22:30
◼
►
as well have a store you take it so
00:22:33
◼
►
yeah and that's terrible because people
00:22:34
◼
►
come over to the house and they're like
00:22:36
◼
►
oh you should open a store and I say why
00:22:41
◼
►
the fuck would I want to open a store I
00:22:44
◼
►
I say this to my friends to who always
00:22:46
◼
►
are thinking and I'm sorry to keep
00:22:48
◼
►
swearing because i know you I no no this
00:22:50
◼
►
is a different thing we can call we want
00:22:52
◼
►
a good excellent
00:22:53
◼
►
we won't get featured on the itunes
00:22:55
◼
►
store oh well then let's be pigs
00:22:57
◼
►
no I want to get featured her i don't
00:22:59
◼
►
like my thumb
00:23:01
◼
►
I'm not gonna edit this john i just i
00:23:02
◼
►
don't have the cycles we don't know the
00:23:04
◼
►
cycles and I want we want to keep it
00:23:06
◼
►
real as you guys say know a lot about
00:23:09
◼
►
with you like it's a full lunch is that
00:23:11
◼
►
the one that is like when we've gone
00:23:12
◼
►
together i really have thought the
00:23:13
◼
►
entire time when the fuck are we gonna
00:23:15
◼
►
leave here is that you really do seem to
00:23:17
◼
►
look at anything that might fit you like
00:23:20
◼
►
yeah yeah I'm wearing a lamp right now
00:23:23
◼
►
vintage lamp inside western lands got a
00:23:25
◼
►
yoke but that but the child has
00:23:27
◼
►
introduced this whole new universe of
00:23:30
◼
►
shopping for things for the child at
00:23:32
◼
►
thrift stores and I'm i ah I have a hard
00:23:39
◼
►
time with buying children's clothes
00:23:41
◼
►
full stop thrift stores are not like it
00:23:44
◼
►
seems to me that you could wrap a child
00:23:46
◼
►
in burlap for the times that the child
00:23:48
◼
►
needs to be outside and protected from
00:23:50
◼
►
the elements and really the rest of the
00:23:52
◼
►
time just why why are we dressing this
00:23:54
◼
►
why are we dressing this baby on so many
00:23:58
◼
►
levels so I mean I like it's the so many
00:24:00
◼
►
reasons not to dress a child that is
00:24:02
◼
►
yeah and I'm in the best I'm in the
00:24:04
◼
►
decided minority because as you are
00:24:08
◼
►
I'll as you do i live in a world of
00:24:09
◼
►
women where I I look out from my from
00:24:13
◼
►
I ivory tower and all I see is a sea of
00:24:16
◼
►
women stretching to the horizon and then
00:24:18
◼
►
somewhere in the very far distance
00:24:20
◼
►
there's like some guys in a band but uh
00:24:25
◼
►
and the women are about to address this
00:24:28
◼
►
child compulsively this isn't that the
00:24:31
◼
►
kid is in six different outfits every
00:24:33
◼
►
day but so I go to the thrift stores and
00:24:36
◼
►
i'm not i I can't look for little sailor
00:24:38
◼
►
costumes or whatever but i am now
00:24:40
◼
►
finding i'm on this whole trip where I'm
00:24:44
◼
►
like buying old broken toys for the
00:24:48
◼
►
child and then this like the broken part
00:24:51
◼
►
I like the broken it dovetails with so
00:24:53
◼
►
many of my interests fixing broken toys
00:24:56
◼
►
is one of my interest old toys old
00:24:59
◼
►
broken things internal appreciation for
00:25:01
◼
►
disappointment right the kid learns from
00:25:04
◼
►
a very young age that her toys don't
00:25:07
◼
►
um and so not to get ahead of herself in
00:25:11
◼
►
like I want there's a lot you know
00:25:12
◼
►
here's what you have you have a broken
00:25:14
◼
►
Christmas morning literally break every
00:25:17
◼
►
toy in front of her you go here you have
00:25:20
◼
►
a wood toy that other children have
00:25:22
◼
►
played with to death and now you get to
00:25:26
◼
►
win you get to caress it's worn surfaces
00:25:29
◼
►
and try not to get cut on my name is
00:25:33
◼
►
Jeff reality and you know what that is
00:25:37
◼
►
that's daddy's life that's daddy's life
00:25:40
◼
►
condensed there's a big difference
00:25:41
◼
►
between a thrift store and like the
00:25:44
◼
►
consignment thing though I was very
00:25:46
◼
►
opposed to anything used when people
00:25:48
◼
►
were very kindly offering us like stuff
00:25:50
◼
►
because you know right we should come
00:25:52
◼
►
back to this but one reason you don't
00:25:53
◼
►
dress the kids because they just got
00:25:54
◼
►
shit all over them all the time not
00:25:56
◼
►
literal poop but I just stuff there's
00:25:58
◼
►
this covered with junk all the time then
00:26:00
◼
►
basically mom literally maps little poop
00:26:03
◼
►
doesn't dust bunnies small electronics
00:26:06
◼
►
that it's going to all eventually be
00:26:08
◼
►
something you're going to need to clean
00:26:09
◼
►
out of some kind of a cotton like a plan
00:26:12
◼
►
maybe but I was resistant exactly that
00:26:14
◼
►
was my special special little kid you
00:26:17
◼
►
not want to give a bunch of junk now of
00:26:19
◼
►
course we do have other people in like
00:26:20
◼
►
10 seriously please take this toy don't
00:26:23
◼
►
spend sixty dollars on this please take
00:26:25
◼
►
but now we've looked into some I mean
00:26:27
◼
►
we've gotten some hand-me-downs and I
00:26:29
◼
►
couldn't be happier
00:26:30
◼
►
but my most of the things that our
00:26:33
◼
►
daughter owns and where's are
00:26:35
◼
►
hand-me-downs we did have to go through
00:26:38
◼
►
a two-stage process first eliminating
00:26:42
◼
►
the things that were like visibly
00:26:46
◼
►
covered in barf and then going through
00:26:50
◼
►
that set so that we called that group of
00:26:53
◼
►
stuff and then went through this went
00:26:57
◼
►
through the hand-me-downs a second time
00:26:59
◼
►
to to try to detect the invisible barf
00:27:03
◼
►
and the lookout like I like infrared or
00:27:07
◼
►
like a block a backlight yeah you kind
00:27:10
◼
►
of you have to hold it up and you know
00:27:11
◼
►
we're dealing with your fingers and go
00:27:13
◼
►
is this garment just held together with
00:27:17
◼
►
dried barf or is this mostly clean
00:27:21
◼
►
because as you know a lot of kids
00:27:23
◼
►
clothes the kid only wears it once or
00:27:25
◼
►
twice and then they've outgrown it so a
00:27:28
◼
►
lot of kids clothes are fairly pristine
00:27:30
◼
►
other things are just it's just a suit
00:27:34
◼
►
of vomit so we went through and we
00:27:38
◼
►
called that we called all that out and
00:27:41
◼
►
then we had some pretty nice stuff that
00:27:44
◼
►
was all either free or or pennies on the
00:27:47
◼
►
dollar and I that but that's that's true
00:27:51
◼
►
of everything I own I I went through a
00:27:53
◼
►
phase about nine months ago where I had
00:27:56
◼
►
never owned a Ralph Lauren garment in my
00:28:00
◼
►
life when I was in when i was in high
00:28:04
◼
►
school and ralph lauren garments became
00:28:06
◼
►
were first fashionable with my own my
00:28:09
◼
►
peers my mom refused to buy me a rare
00:28:12
◼
►
flower and anything because she said but
00:28:15
◼
►
that should cost $65 at sears i could
00:28:19
◼
►
buy six shirts so I never had a real
00:28:24
◼
►
friend about the polo shirt very popular
00:28:27
◼
►
publisher often worn to a time
00:28:29
◼
►
no I never had one of those right and
00:28:32
◼
►
then I don't know nine months ago a year
00:28:34
◼
►
ago I was in a thrift store and I bought
00:28:38
◼
►
a shirt it was
00:28:39
◼
►
it was I there was a day that where I'd
00:28:41
◼
►
left the house thinking it was gonna be
00:28:43
◼
►
a warm day and then it turned into a
00:28:45
◼
►
cold day I know being from San Francisco
00:28:49
◼
►
you have no idea what I'm talking about
00:28:50
◼
►
right now it just stops and buzz from
00:28:53
◼
►
yeah but I'm so I went into the forest
00:28:55
◼
►
dr bought this shirt and it was a it was
00:28:58
◼
►
a pretty nice shirt and it was a Ralph
00:29:02
◼
►
Lorenz shirt so I thought I'm a grown-up
00:29:06
◼
►
now i'm not gonna spend the rest of my
00:29:09
◼
►
life wearing a you know creeper lagoon
00:29:13
◼
►
t-shirts i'm gonna i can i can buy some
00:29:17
◼
►
shirts some nice shirts that have a
00:29:19
◼
►
creepy-looking t-shirt
00:29:20
◼
►
oh yeah really creepy lagoon and fiber
00:29:23
◼
►
and all the greats
00:29:25
◼
►
I love to have a careful examination in
00:29:28
◼
►
fact I think I've that I think right now
00:29:30
◼
►
i'm wearing a shirt that you gave me it
00:29:32
◼
►
says San Francisco transit t-shirt
00:29:35
◼
►
commemorating them the trolley cars or
00:29:39
◼
►
something huh
00:29:41
◼
►
I can't see it it's on my tommy wiseau
00:29:43
◼
►
poppy pop for analogy that you get the
00:29:45
◼
►
polo shirt long sleeve shirt so I
00:29:48
◼
►
started going to thrift stores and
00:29:49
◼
►
instead of looking for the stuff that I
00:29:51
◼
►
usually look for ice I include I i
00:29:55
◼
►
didn't i didn't substitute but I i added
00:29:58
◼
►
a new section that I was willing to
00:30:01
◼
►
peruse which was the button-down shirt
00:30:04
◼
►
section and I started buying ralph
00:30:07
◼
►
lauren shirts that I found that we're
00:30:09
◼
►
good condition that were cheap and I you
00:30:11
◼
►
know I kind of set like a two-dollar to
00:30:13
◼
►
five dollar maximum on what I was
00:30:16
◼
►
willing to pay you can still pay that
00:30:17
◼
►
for a shirt at your thrift stores
00:30:19
◼
►
oh yeah well and a lot of these shirts
00:30:21
◼
►
you know they're there they're expensive
00:30:24
◼
►
shirts they were purchased originally by
00:30:26
◼
►
rich people probably by Rich wives or
00:30:30
◼
►
girlfriends and given to men who did not
00:30:33
◼
►
have an interest in the shirt who died
00:30:36
◼
►
he then died or who got divorced and
00:30:41
◼
►
gave away all their shirts and are
00:30:43
◼
►
sitting somewhere right now with their
00:30:44
◼
►
hand down the front of their genes that
00:30:46
◼
►
dad jeans watching sports on a big TV
00:30:50
◼
►
so the thrift stores are full of these
00:30:52
◼
►
clothes that really haven't been warned
00:30:54
◼
►
that we're very expensive initially and
00:30:58
◼
►
you can buy them for next to nothing so
00:31:00
◼
►
I decided though I'm good now I'm gonna
00:31:02
◼
►
have her shirts with the little horsey
00:31:04
◼
►
on the autumn and I swear to you in the
00:31:08
◼
►
past year I probably about 20 of these
00:31:11
◼
►
things now I'm I'm like mr. horsey shirt
00:31:14
◼
►
guy that's your thing
00:31:15
◼
►
it's my bits my present thing yeah you
00:31:17
◼
►
often have a thing
00:31:19
◼
►
yeah yeah you gotta have a thing that's
00:31:21
◼
►
the thing that strikes me is like you
00:31:22
◼
►
you are you can think of at least two
00:31:25
◼
►
examples of things that I i associate
00:31:27
◼
►
three things that I associate with you
00:31:30
◼
►
customers many more but like there's
00:31:32
◼
►
that there's the was a clark dick
00:31:37
◼
►
clark's there's an open market john
00:31:38
◼
►
clark shoes is a little comic aust hurts
00:31:41
◼
►
Stan Smith sneakers yes i'm setting
00:31:45
◼
►
aside the chick magnet trucker cap for a
00:31:47
◼
►
like what you wear them at the wrong
00:31:48
◼
►
time you didn't wear the stan smith
00:31:50
◼
►
shoes when they were when they were hot
00:31:52
◼
►
like in the eighties or whatever right
00:31:54
◼
►
ditto for the eyes on the cost shirts
00:31:56
◼
►
right you bring it back you taking
00:31:58
◼
►
internet is that right like that for you
00:32:01
◼
►
I mean I i get i get fascinated by a by
00:32:04
◼
►
a thing and it's it's kind of outside of
00:32:09
◼
►
I don't know why I get fascinated by
00:32:12
◼
►
these things but what I do and then I
00:32:14
◼
►
then it's like a it's like it that
00:32:17
◼
►
demarcates the passage of time in a way
00:32:20
◼
►
like right i was wearing izod shirts for
00:32:23
◼
►
a while a couple of years ago and that
00:32:27
◼
►
it wasn't it in reaction to or even
00:32:30
◼
►
participating in other people's fashion
00:32:32
◼
►
it was just a thing that I got
00:32:35
◼
►
interested in and and and then I could
00:32:40
◼
►
then i got a now I'm over it and I don't
00:32:43
◼
►
wear eyes on shirts anymore and I've
00:32:45
◼
►
sent them back into the stream the izod
00:32:48
◼
►
shirts are into the river of life and
00:32:51
◼
►
there someone else has them now but I
00:32:54
◼
►
remember I remember at one point coming
00:32:57
◼
►
through your town when we were i had
00:33:00
◼
►
developed a vintage cowboy boot
00:33:03
◼
►
fascination and then it kind of spread
00:33:06
◼
►
to everybody in my band for a while
00:33:08
◼
►
there we were all wearing how would the
00:33:10
◼
►
eric and Michael yeah I'll stomping
00:33:13
◼
►
around the house in these pointy boots I
00:33:14
◼
►
remember that yeah and we would go to
00:33:16
◼
►
these like these little junk shops on
00:33:19
◼
►
the side of the road in Arkansas and
00:33:21
◼
►
there'd be all these cowboy boots you
00:33:24
◼
►
know these Tony Lamas from the fifties
00:33:27
◼
►
just covered with cobwebs and you go in
00:33:30
◼
►
there and buy a pair for twenty bucks
00:33:32
◼
►
and so anyway that became a thing for me
00:33:36
◼
►
for a while and I've got 25 pairs of
00:33:38
◼
►
vintage elephant skin powder blue cowboy
00:33:43
◼
►
boots here in the house that that uh I
00:33:46
◼
►
don't wear that much but i but i have i
00:33:48
◼
►
did buy a shelving unit and now they're
00:33:50
◼
►
kind of a their art display
00:33:52
◼
►
yeah like you're a lot like Einstein not
00:33:56
◼
►
good well I think you're like Einstein
00:33:59
◼
►
supposedly Einstein sister isn't one of
00:34:01
◼
►
stories here is like a cartoon character
00:34:02
◼
►
he just wore the same thing everyday
00:34:04
◼
►
right and so he would amenities you just
00:34:07
◼
►
go in the closet you grab the same
00:34:08
◼
►
clothes is it seems like that's all you
00:34:10
◼
►
have a very busy mind we have a lot of
00:34:12
◼
►
things going on a lot of people you need
00:34:13
◼
►
to talk to and it seems to me you want
00:34:15
◼
►
to keep it simple so you know right you
00:34:17
◼
►
probably order the same pretty pleased
00:34:19
◼
►
when you go into the bar you get the
00:34:20
◼
►
same burger we know when you go to
00:34:21
◼
►
burger place i'm thinking and is that
00:34:24
◼
►
right i can get close you can just go in
00:34:26
◼
►
and you know what you're in for
00:34:27
◼
►
there are some people like my my friend
00:34:30
◼
►
david bazan from the band pedro the lion
00:34:32
◼
►
who now is travels under his own name
00:34:35
◼
►
davis on da where's XX Christian I
00:34:40
◼
►
well you have formerly a devout
00:34:44
◼
►
Christian now a questioning man in the
00:34:49
◼
►
driving on a suspended license he's now
00:34:51
◼
►
he's now well I think you may have
00:34:53
◼
►
gotten his license renewed but he's now
00:34:56
◼
►
he's now you know he's one of these one
00:34:59
◼
►
of the seekers and Davis on does not
00:35:03
◼
►
want to have to think about his clothes
00:35:04
◼
►
so he wears the same black t-shirt and
00:35:08
◼
►
levi's jeans every day
00:35:11
◼
►
and Chris wall of death cab for cutie
00:35:13
◼
►
very similar mentality to what you're
00:35:16
◼
►
saying when when when a converse decided
00:35:22
◼
►
they were going to stop making shoes in
00:35:24
◼
►
America and start making shoes in China
00:35:26
◼
►
chris waller went out and bought i'm
00:35:30
◼
►
pretty sure 25 pairs of low top
00:35:36
◼
►
cream-colored american-made converse
00:35:39
◼
►
which he still is working his way
00:35:44
◼
►
he has that this was ten years ago at
00:35:48
◼
►
and he has them stacked somewhere and
00:35:50
◼
►
when he wears a pair out he goes into
00:35:52
◼
►
the vault and brings out a new pair of
00:35:54
◼
►
converse and breaks them in so I'm not
00:35:58
◼
►
like that and actually wala once said to
00:36:01
◼
►
me I showed up at the studio one day and
00:36:03
◼
►
he said from day to day I don't know
00:36:06
◼
►
whether you're gonna walk in that door
00:36:07
◼
►
looking like a tenured professor of
00:36:10
◼
►
literature or like a space cowboy from
00:36:14
◼
►
the planet Soltan he said what I don't
00:36:18
◼
►
like what every day it's like a it's
00:36:21
◼
►
like you come in it and you're not
00:36:23
◼
►
exactly in costume but you're in an
00:36:26
◼
►
outfit that doesn't have any
00:36:30
◼
►
relationship to the outfit you wore
00:36:31
◼
►
yesterday or the outfit you're going to
00:36:33
◼
►
wear tomorrow and I hadn't even noticed
00:36:37
◼
►
honestly until he pointed out that that
00:36:41
◼
►
was true and I don't know what it
00:36:44
◼
►
represents curiosity about curiosity
00:36:50
◼
►
about identity that's what it is it's
00:36:54
◼
►
curiosity about identity because I'm
00:36:58
◼
►
glad you were close though I do wear
00:37:01
◼
►
clothes at least out of the house i'm
00:37:02
◼
►
not wearing clothes right now I mean all
00:37:04
◼
►
the time but i mean i think it's i think
00:37:06
◼
►
it's a good direction for you
00:37:08
◼
►
yeah yeah i think so too I like the way
00:37:11
◼
►
you dress I think I think you have an
00:37:12
◼
►
interesting an interesting way of
00:37:13
◼
►
dressing suite
00:37:15
◼
►
yeah I do and I see the appeal is ty
00:37:18
◼
►
preferred before is the cartoon
00:37:20
◼
►
character approach you know you don't
00:37:22
◼
►
see like Donald Duck
00:37:24
◼
►
you know show up you know in a def
00:37:26
◼
►
leppard sure he's always got the little
00:37:28
◼
►
sailor deal going on you guys I
00:37:30
◼
►
iconographic just just like your hair if
00:37:33
◼
►
you're if you were to show up at an
00:37:34
◼
►
event and your hair was was
00:37:38
◼
►
professionally styled yes people would
00:37:43
◼
►
say when does Merlin man arrived
00:37:45
◼
►
it's got a flat though it's not the hair
00:37:47
◼
►
used to be it's got a flat i need a
00:37:50
◼
►
haircut gotta go see Joey I believe in
00:37:52
◼
►
your hair though I believe it will I
00:37:54
◼
►
believe it will surge you think it'll
00:37:56
◼
►
get a second wind
00:37:57
◼
►
I don't get well because you've got a
00:37:59
◼
►
head of hair you're you're in your
00:38:01
◼
►
forties now and your hair's not going
00:38:03
◼
►
anywhere so far I mean it's getting
00:38:05
◼
►
great now which wich milady likes which
00:38:08
◼
►
i think is cool at least she says she
00:38:09
◼
►
likes it's easy enough to say that but
00:38:10
◼
►
yeah it's I feel lucky in that sense I
00:38:13
◼
►
feel died I mean I'm insecure about so
00:38:15
◼
►
many things that I'm glad I don't have
00:38:17
◼
►
to also be insecure about being a
00:38:19
◼
►
cliché of a man losing his hair
00:38:21
◼
►
yeah yeah I don't appear to be losing my
00:38:24
◼
►
no you said you got a really really good
00:38:26
◼
►
hair yeah i do i'm losing everything
00:38:28
◼
►
else but but not my hair
00:38:31
◼
►
I'm losing my hearing can you believe
00:38:33
◼
►
that i'm a mess on the hearing front
00:38:37
◼
►
yeah i went to a birthday party where
00:38:39
◼
►
the birthday party was that we're
00:38:41
◼
►
shooting ak-47 and in between clinical
00:38:47
◼
►
tingle picklehead before he even between
00:38:50
◼
►
clips i took my my headphones off my my
00:38:54
◼
►
earphones and then somebody shot
00:38:58
◼
►
somebody fired around and I didn't have
00:39:01
◼
►
my earphones on and I swear to you 20
00:39:05
◼
►
years of playing rock music I did less
00:39:09
◼
►
damage to my hearing then that one
00:39:11
◼
►
bullet fired right next to me with with
00:39:14
◼
►
my earphone off my ear
00:39:16
◼
►
it's it it just was like it was like an
00:39:19
◼
►
ice pick to the head and and I got a
00:39:22
◼
►
ring I got a ring and get the tinnitus
00:39:25
◼
►
the tenants whatever God gotta I gotta I
00:39:28
◼
►
gotta ringing oh god
00:39:30
◼
►
that sucks that's not that's not good oh
00:39:33
◼
►
my goodness we really that's awful
00:39:37
◼
►
do you listen to noise at night
00:39:40
◼
►
no no it's not it's not tonight is like
00:39:42
◼
►
where I'm where I'm clawing at the side
00:39:45
◼
►
of my head in madness
00:39:46
◼
►
it's just you know no more than usual
00:39:50
◼
►
ya know and not not any more than I do
00:39:53
◼
►
to get the you know the earwigs that in
00:39:56
◼
►
there a lot but uh but you know it is it
00:40:00
◼
►
isn't it is a sound I can duplicate that
00:40:03
◼
►
the pitch of the sound so I i am hearing
00:40:05
◼
►
and endless and it's I I remember my dad
00:40:08
◼
►
I'm my dad's favorite word for the last
00:40:12
◼
►
30 years of his life was 10 which makes
00:40:18
◼
►
everybody around you lose their mind
00:40:21
◼
►
after and I i hear myself doing it I'm
00:40:25
◼
►
already like but I think I don't know
00:40:29
◼
►
why I'm saying it like an old Jewish man
00:40:31
◼
►
look at that and see myself as I get
00:40:33
◼
►
older maybe 75 like I'd what you're
00:40:37
◼
►
gonna do one of those like could you
00:40:38
◼
►
repeat the salad dressing kind of guys
00:40:40
◼
►
pick up and like you know the nice part
00:40:43
◼
►
is like I think a lot about my senility
00:40:44
◼
►
because I know it's gonna happen i think
00:40:46
◼
►
it's probably kind of underway already
00:40:47
◼
►
and i like to think a lot about how all
00:40:49
◼
►
my numerous every all of my numerous
00:40:53
◼
►
drawbacks as a human being are gonna
00:40:56
◼
►
really cool s nicely together I think
00:40:59
◼
►
being a guy who doesn't listen very well
00:41:01
◼
►
talks a lot isn't very smart doesn't
00:41:03
◼
►
think a lot about what he says and
00:41:04
◼
►
sometimes a little bit nervous and
00:41:06
◼
►
paranoid it's gonna come together very
00:41:08
◼
►
that's a great combo if i miss here the
00:41:10
◼
►
dressing I'm gonna be pretty sure people
00:41:12
◼
►
are out to get me I can already tell but
00:41:14
◼
►
you know i i've noticed i mean there was
00:41:15
◼
►
a while there where your paranoia i was
00:41:18
◼
►
concerned what I was like Merlin is
00:41:20
◼
►
getting more and more paranoid all the
00:41:22
◼
►
I don't know what people worry about me
00:41:23
◼
►
sometimes I just go through i go through
00:41:25
◼
►
the thing itself i'm always still the
00:41:26
◼
►
same awful person
00:41:27
◼
►
well but that's the thing yeah i think
00:41:29
◼
►
you I think your paranoia it ballooned
00:41:31
◼
►
and you've ratcheted back or something
00:41:33
◼
►
because you sneeze you seem a lot less
00:41:35
◼
►
paranoid that you get a year ago how
00:41:37
◼
►
long he's been saying that i don't know
00:41:39
◼
►
but there was a there was a window there
00:41:41
◼
►
was a few months
00:41:43
◼
►
disagree I disagree I don't like people
00:41:45
◼
►
being worried about me I really concerns
00:41:47
◼
►
me when people are worried about me
00:41:49
◼
►
so you're worried about people being
00:41:51
◼
►
worried about you know I'm just saying
00:41:52
◼
►
that the lady says Thousand Island
00:41:54
◼
►
dressing on understand i might stab her
00:41:56
◼
►
in the mouth fucked up and I think
00:41:58
◼
►
there's something else going on
00:41:59
◼
►
you speak more clearly miss and then I
00:42:02
◼
►
took 25 minutes people going on and I
00:42:05
◼
►
wouldn't even realize it
00:42:06
◼
►
there are cover you but you have a very
00:42:08
◼
►
good you have a tight-knit group of
00:42:09
◼
►
friends who are you saying i'm here but
00:42:11
◼
►
i don't have a lot of friends is what
00:42:13
◼
►
you're saying you have a very tight-knit
00:42:14
◼
►
group of friends that's not i'm not
00:42:16
◼
►
saying that that is that means it's a
00:42:17
◼
►
small group of friends it's just tight
00:42:19
◼
►
knit ok its people spread across America
00:42:22
◼
►
to people all over America who care
00:42:25
◼
►
about Merlin man who ya think about let
00:42:28
◼
►
them not just care think about Merlin
00:42:31
◼
►
Mann day-to-day like an ongoing way
00:42:34
◼
►
yeah just sort of like you really meant
00:42:36
◼
►
it totally freaks me out to think that
00:42:37
◼
►
does that doesn't really that's an awful
00:42:40
◼
►
thought my gosh I wish I just decide
00:42:43
◼
►
like just know that I disappear when i'm
00:42:44
◼
►
not with somebody
00:42:45
◼
►
sure right back up thought oh my god
00:42:49
◼
►
I've told you about being on tour and
00:42:51
◼
►
people come up to me in in bars or you
00:42:54
◼
►
know at shows and and I see them coming
00:42:57
◼
►
kinda with outstretched hand and your
00:43:01
◼
►
piece and I'm ready for my peace i put
00:43:04
◼
►
to right between their eyes not have
00:43:06
◼
►
standard air arcade fire i'm ready to
00:43:09
◼
►
say hello o.o you like my records why
00:43:14
◼
►
and they walk up amigo you know Merlin
00:43:17
◼
►
man i love that i can hear you can't
00:43:21
◼
►
hear you I can't hear you
00:43:22
◼
►
I find it very very hard to play first
00:43:24
◼
►
of all it's very hard to get to you
00:43:26
◼
►
because the feelings of security that
00:43:27
◼
►
you have around here right here
00:43:29
◼
►
frequently a little fast and loose with
00:43:31
◼
►
the bathing and well-liked a that I just
00:43:35
◼
►
don't use soap
00:43:36
◼
►
well that's that's a religious issue i
00:43:40
◼
►
take four baths a day pray but I don't
00:43:42
◼
►
believe in soap no buttons and no soap
00:43:44
◼
►
and they're both in vain conceit of the
00:43:48
◼
►
English we call them talking about i
00:43:51
◼
►
think we should stop pretty soon though
00:43:53
◼
►
because this is this is good enough and
00:43:55
◼
►
now I still wanna talk to you about
00:43:56
◼
►
glasses i was talking about Hitler I
00:43:58
◼
►
want to come back to steaks what was
00:43:59
◼
►
that place we went was that place the
00:44:01
◼
►
last place i fancy place where was
00:44:03
◼
►
likely a thousand dollars how much was
00:44:04
◼
►
that was good what was that place was
00:44:06
◼
►
this where we sat outside there was a
00:44:07
◼
►
demand late then we could replace that
00:44:10
◼
►
well it was what was this place where we
00:44:12
◼
►
smoked cigars after dinner I don't smoke
00:44:15
◼
►
I I it was it was that dark place where
00:44:18
◼
►
they were really nice to us even a good
00:44:20
◼
►
thing was that it was El Gaucho it was
00:44:23
◼
►
Al gaucho unquestionably yeah that was a
00:44:25
◼
►
good a steak
00:44:27
◼
►
yeah we had a good time there but but
00:44:29
◼
►
you started this conversation talking
00:44:30
◼
►
about a time where we gossiped about our
00:44:32
◼
►
friends at an outdoor steak restaurants
00:44:34
◼
►
near water and what were we go with that
00:44:37
◼
►
we were at the edgewater hotel really it
00:44:41
◼
►
seemed like a place where there's a lot
00:44:42
◼
►
of outdoor seating it looks like it
00:44:43
◼
►
might be the kind of place that served
00:44:45
◼
►
Badfish to tourists but it was a little
00:44:47
◼
►
bit fancy yeah and i think we had water
00:44:49
◼
►
in a clear glass now and we're down sit
00:44:53
◼
►
we gossiped I think that chairs and we
00:44:55
◼
►
gossiped about some of your former
00:44:57
◼
►
bandmates for like 14 hours was scott
00:44:59
◼
►
simpson there i'm not familiar with this
00:45:02
◼
►
no he wasn't this was this is a pretty
00:45:03
◼
►
long time ago oh this is when you still
00:45:06
◼
►
thought about people who quit your band
00:45:09
◼
►
ok I was not given to believe you don't
00:45:11
◼
►
really worry about so much anymore
00:45:12
◼
►
well it's there are so many people now i
00:45:14
◼
►
would i'd spend all my time just
00:45:16
◼
►
thinking about all the people that have
00:45:17
◼
►
been in the long winters in the
00:45:19
◼
►
fastbacks around think about drivers all
00:45:21
◼
►
no but you know they're coming here
00:45:24
◼
►
they're coming here again I've ever had
00:45:25
◼
►
already bought tickets so they're half
00:45:27
◼
►
of the fastbacks just are watching the
00:45:30
◼
►
are just watching mods float around in
00:45:33
◼
►
the in their room and thinking pretty I
00:45:37
◼
►
mean the other half of the fastbacks are
00:45:39
◼
►
there just you know their regular
00:45:41
◼
►
American wondering when the model will
00:45:43
◼
►
bring them more to drink
00:45:45
◼
►
so the fastbacks are coming to San
00:45:46
◼
►
Francisco with that band that kind of
00:45:48
◼
►
our them off the muffs the muffs are
00:45:50
◼
►
opening for them
00:45:51
◼
►
don't let them offer them off slightly
00:45:52
◼
►
worried i think the muffs it feels to me
00:45:54
◼
►
got a lot of stick from the fastbacks
00:45:56
◼
►
tell me the fastbacks are are as great
00:45:59
◼
►
as they ever were
00:46:01
◼
►
well you just me that guy in a barn and
00:46:03
◼
►
made my fucking year
00:46:05
◼
►
yeah yeah clock
00:46:06
◼
►
just like I love that guy in fact this
00:46:08
◼
►
saturday I'm uh I'm starring in a music
00:46:11
◼
►
video for a local band here called stag
00:46:14
◼
►
and a current block is also going to be
00:46:17
◼
►
in that music video i'm playing a
00:46:21
◼
►
dejected heart i'm wearing a giant heart
00:46:25
◼
►
costume and Kurt block i think is going
00:46:29
◼
►
to be Santa clogged naturally yeah he's
00:46:35
◼
►
really he's like that's gonna be fun i
00:46:37
◼
►
wish you would do more work as talent i
00:46:38
◼
►
think that when you know acting talent i
00:46:39
◼
►
think that would be fun you're great at
00:46:41
◼
►
December's video at the big-ass beard
00:46:42
◼
►
yeah I don't uh somehow I thought that
00:46:46
◼
►
that appearing in December's video was
00:46:48
◼
►
really going to send my career through
00:46:50
◼
►
the roof but it right i think the beard
00:46:52
◼
►
most people don't recognize it as me i
00:46:54
◼
►
think most people only remember the
00:46:56
◼
►
barest Smith in the black smithy yeah
00:46:58
◼
►
you know I'm actually a character called
00:47:01
◼
►
Colin and his wife just released a a a
00:47:08
◼
►
book for preteens or I guess teens early
00:47:10
◼
►
teens where Colin wrote the story and
00:47:17
◼
►
Carson wrote the part of the drunk on
00:47:21
◼
►
ice and one of the characters in the
00:47:23
◼
►
book is called jock Roderick and he's a
00:47:31
◼
►
he's a vagabond and it does it TP
00:47:37
◼
►
anybody's house he doesn't I don't think
00:47:39
◼
►
in the book ET does any toilet papering
00:47:41
◼
►
but he is an honor
00:47:43
◼
►
yeah so I'm so now I've been
00:47:45
◼
►
immortalized in in cartoon form
00:47:47
◼
►
well again again immortalized again in
00:47:52
◼
►
cartoon form
00:47:53
◼
►
I want to talk about steak I want to
00:47:55
◼
►
talk about uh the eyeglasses are you
00:47:59
◼
►
listening what we're going to talk about
00:48:00
◼
►
that next time next time next time this
00:48:02
◼
►
is a perfect length is the perfectly
00:48:03
◼
►
we've already talked to liz is perfect
00:48:05
◼
►
no I you know we could I we literally
00:48:06
◼
►
could talk forever and so I'm thinking
00:48:08
◼
►
we should just we should once a week we
00:48:09
◼
►
should do this and we always got we
00:48:10
◼
►
always get one in the chamber enormous
00:48:11
◼
►
am absolutely
00:48:13
◼
►
well I want to talk about the Tea Party
00:48:17
◼
►
you talk about really to politics i want
00:48:22
◼
►
to talk about the Tea Party you want to
00:48:23
◼
►
talk about the Tea Party given angle on
00:48:25
◼
►
yeah i got an angle alright with you
00:48:27
◼
►
next time yeah let's do it next time
00:48:29
◼
►
alright alright I don't really have a
00:48:32
◼
►
wait-and-see you
00:48:34
◼
►
oh we're looking we're searching for an
00:48:35
◼
►
ending no no what I mean we we should we
00:48:38
◼
►
should do when somebody I i oh you know
00:48:40
◼
►
what i was talking to Jonathan Coulton
00:48:43
◼
►
and I said Merlin and i are going to do
00:48:44
◼
►
this talk on the phone once a week and
00:48:48
◼
►
jonathan coulton said you gotta have an
00:48:50
◼
►
angle i said i don't know if we have an
00:48:54
◼
►
angle and he said no no you gotta have
00:48:55
◼
►
an angle and this spending too much time
00:48:59
◼
►
with Flansburg that's right you
00:49:00
◼
►
understand what I think he's always got
00:49:02
◼
►
to know each other get a note now that's
00:49:04
◼
►
exactly right because that's Flansburg
00:49:06
◼
►
ones and what's your angle you gotta
00:49:07
◼
►
have an angle
00:49:08
◼
►
you know you should do a show about
00:49:09
◼
►
puppet people love puppets let me get
00:49:11
◼
►
back on the final guys got puppets but I
00:49:14
◼
►
don't know I but I don't know what our
00:49:16
◼
►
angle is an end here
00:49:17
◼
►
Colton said what we should do here's
00:49:19
◼
►
here was his idea i forgot to say this
00:49:21
◼
►
so she said this is the beginning
00:49:22
◼
►
ok Cole said we should we should play 20
00:49:26
◼
►
seconds of a song any song and then
00:49:30
◼
►
that'll be our launching pad for 20
00:49:34
◼
►
seconds of a song that will start
00:49:35
◼
►
talking about the song and then wolf
00:49:37
◼
►
because that's what we do i would do
00:49:39
◼
►
that i was little i mean that'd be
00:49:41
◼
►
that'd be a good feature my feeling is
00:49:42
◼
►
that these things find their own
00:49:43
◼
►
through-line I consider this a pilot i
00:49:45
◼
►
don't know if we'll ever do it again
00:49:46
◼
►
I don't know if anyone listen to i don't
00:49:47
◼
►
really care i'm gonna go put these on a
00:49:49
◼
►
website and we'll keep doing this I'll
00:49:52
◼
►
do whatever you want to do I just like
00:49:54
◼
►
the idea of rock on the line and just
00:49:55
◼
►
make me happy
00:49:56
◼
►
yeah I don't know if we need the I i
00:49:58
◼
►
said to Jonathan what we should what you
00:49:59
◼
►
and I should do is just play like the
00:50:01
◼
►
first 20 minutes 20 seconds of tax man
00:50:04
◼
►
and every every week we talked about it
00:50:08
◼
►
for half an hour in a totally different
00:50:11
◼
►
way i'll listen at baseline that doesn't
00:50:14
◼
►
it's it's astounding it's astounding
00:50:17
◼
►
oh I you know we should do that we need
00:50:20
◼
►
music i should use that song that you
00:50:22
◼
►
don't like that i like that's she never
00:50:27
◼
►
ok who's sugar from say and why don't
00:50:31
◼
►
you do anything with sugar and said you
00:50:33
◼
►
still not like it
00:50:34
◼
►
no I haven't listened to it for years I
00:50:38
◼
►
can't find some other computer its I
00:50:41
◼
►
don't know it's it's got that nice big
00:50:42
◼
►
you know what it would work that you
00:50:44
◼
►
could fade it out of the way that they
00:50:46
◼
►
get the beginning and it goes right in
00:50:47
◼
►
use it as the theme I think that's a
00:50:49
◼
►
great idea that yeah you have a copy can
00:50:52
◼
►
put your hands right now
00:50:54
◼
►
no like I say I haven't thought about it
00:50:56
◼
►
in a you haven't listened to your music
00:50:58
◼
►
you know i am one of the amount of those
00:51:02
◼
►
artists that not only does not but can
00:51:04
◼
►
hardly bear to if i'm in a store or a
00:51:08
◼
►
bar and my music comes on on the stereo
00:51:12
◼
►
i have a my reaction is always the same
00:51:15
◼
►
at first I go what's that
00:51:17
◼
►
how do I know that and then I go uh-huh
00:51:21
◼
►
uh-huh that's pretty good
00:51:22
◼
►
that's what is that this is a weird i
00:51:25
◼
►
know that and then I go oh oh no oh I
00:51:30
◼
►
have to get out of here happens the same
00:51:32
◼
►
way every time and at the only saving
00:51:35
◼
►
grace is that I always go through a two
00:51:38
◼
►
second period where I'm like oh that I
00:51:40
◼
►
that I like this that that song is cool
00:51:42
◼
►
and that's awkward
00:51:45
◼
►
the only thing that would be worse is if
00:51:47
◼
►
I went oh what is that that's likes now
00:51:50
◼
►
when I realized a little bit like
00:51:51
◼
►
accidentally masturbating about yourself
00:51:53
◼
►
whoa back it up because like 91 job
00:51:56
◼
►
taste that's never happened to tell the
00:51:58
◼
►
stranger but I i tried to listen to the
00:52:01
◼
►
podcast that you and I did last week and
00:52:05
◼
►
I actually caught myself laughing a
00:52:06
◼
►
couple of times in the first 10 minutes
00:52:09
◼
►
of it welcome to the problem and then I
00:52:11
◼
►
and then the second time I caught myself
00:52:13
◼
►
laughing I i just turned it off because
00:52:15
◼
►
I was like what are you laughing at
00:52:16
◼
►
that's restraint that's good that's not
00:52:20
◼
►
what do you have against Hitler talk
00:52:22
◼
►
enough with the Hitler talk my goodness
00:52:26
◼
►
alright let's start with I'll talk to
00:52:28
◼
►
you next week alright talk to you and so
00:52:30
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Thursday's yeah I don't know what's
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trying to think what we want what up
00:52:34
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what you know what I needed my negative
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i think sure need a pattern
00:52:38
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clean clothes I need one thing that
00:52:40
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happens every week and I can do that for
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you will that be you
00:52:45
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well Berlin man i can I can be that suit
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of armor for you thank you you're