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0:00:16[Music]
0:00:21Ferro hi John
0:00:24hi Merlin how's it going everything's
0:00:32great
0:00:33it's so great everything's fine
0:00:37remain calm all as well I got my bacon
0:00:42number today oh you're making them no
0:00:44this is boring stuff but I've struggled
0:00:46I struggle with my computer machine Oh
0:00:48your computer yeah you know I have a
0:00:52computer here yeah is that right yeah
0:00:54but I I felt like I needed another one
0:00:57oh now I'm he's got my attention and so
0:01:00I was like I've got the laptop which
0:01:04already has more computing power than
0:01:06all the computers that sent us to the
0:01:09moon and I'll never use it I'll never
0:01:13use any of that competing power I've
0:01:14always felt with the computers that I
0:01:16look at it it's you know it's this world
0:01:18of potential that I'll never exploit I'm
0:01:21just I'm just using word star but I got
0:01:28this laptop and I didn't want it just
0:01:30felt like it was a it was the special
0:01:32box that I had the special things in but
0:01:34I mean it like a big box that I put
0:01:36other stuff in whoa and I wanted it to
0:01:40be you know like that one that I used to
0:01:42have that everybody laughed at me from
0:01:432005 it was a big box it had stuff in it
0:01:47yeah
0:01:47so I was over at my friend Jason Finn
0:01:50the drummer of the presidents the United
0:01:52States of America's house and he had
0:01:56this uh this Apple sitting there and I
0:02:00said what are you doing with that he's
0:02:02like oh you know cleaning up getting it
0:02:03out of here he said I've got a laptop so
0:02:06I don't need that anymore and I was like
0:02:11hmm he said oh okay for a steak dinner
0:02:20interesting so just sitting there doing
0:02:23nothing for him it's just sitting there
0:02:25doing nothing and he said it'll probably
0:02:27take one more upgrade like it'll
0:02:30probably it's not brand new
0:02:33right but it's still useful for the for
0:02:36the big box that I need that I feel like
0:02:38it need tabletop box so he said doesn't
0:02:44have a keyboard or anything you're gonna
0:02:45have to do that yourself
0:02:48and you know you taught me to buy those
0:02:50solar-powered keyboards so I went I went
0:02:53on to the online and I got one of those
0:02:54sent to me and I went downtown to the
0:02:58fancy coz Jason's like I don't know it's
0:03:00got to be a good steak dinner went down
0:03:02to the fancy steak house at lunch I walk
0:03:06in he's sitting there with this computer
0:03:07on the table like like some real suave
0:03:12guys doing slick handoff but in the
0:03:17interim I remembered that I had found a
0:03:20little bag that I had been meaning to
0:03:23give to Jason which was a special bag
0:03:26and I know how you feel about special
0:03:28bags you know how I feel about special
0:03:30Jason Jason feels this way too this was
0:03:34a bag many many many years ago KEXP our
0:03:37local alternative radio station gave
0:03:41away a messenger bag as a bonus if you
0:03:45donated some big amount of money okay
0:03:50you got this messenger bag and we all
0:03:53got them all the rock musicians at the
0:03:55time got these bags they were bright
0:03:58orange they said KEXP on them some
0:04:02people really and you know it was big
0:04:04enough to put a put a stack of 12-inch
0:04:06records in it this is like a Timbuktu
0:04:07bag nope no it was just it's actually I
0:04:11mean in my personal opinion kind of look
0:04:13it has zero features it's just like a
0:04:15it's just a bag made out of you know bag
0:04:19made out bag that's KEXP honors bright
0:04:22orange a lot of people took these bags
0:04:26as their kind of signature at the time
0:04:28Nabeel our drummer had one I had a
0:04:32couple of them you know it's the bag you
0:04:35throw some stuff in but it never didn't
0:04:37it didn't mean that much emotionally to
0:04:39me so I was going through I was going
0:04:42through bags the other about a month ago
0:04:45and I opened up a bag BIGBANG it was
0:04:49full of bags like dougie and I was like
0:04:52oh look at this look at that I pulled
0:04:54out a pulled out a bag out of there
0:04:55opened it up it had bags and and inside
0:05:00that bag was one of these orange KEXP
0:05:04bags that I hadn't seen in a long time
0:05:06it was in perfect condition
0:05:08Jason was one of these people that had
0:05:11that KEXP bag and he took it everywhere
0:05:13he wore his into the ground he wore out
0:05:16he wore out this bag sounds keep really
0:05:19bonded with the bag he the bag meant so
0:05:21much to him and after he'd blown out
0:05:24this bag he actually you know he made a
0:05:26kind of stink about it around town like
0:05:28he went to KEXP he said why don't you
0:05:31guys make this bag again and they were
0:05:33like that's from ten years ago and he
0:05:34said I know but it's the best like could
0:05:36you make this bag just like make just a
0:05:39landfill at a special level nobody would
0:05:43accommodate him and I knew he was
0:05:46brokenhearted that he they couldn't
0:05:48replace this bag so I'm down there and
0:05:51I'm like surprised I brought you the
0:05:56like unobtainium bag hmm
0:05:59oh he gets all teary-eyed he hugs it to
0:06:05himself like you know like a like his
0:06:07childhood teddy bear but now we're in
0:06:10this uncomfortable position where I've
0:06:12given him something worth a lot more to
0:06:14him than this dump computer he's giving
0:06:16me and yet I'm still on the hook for
0:06:19buying him mistake and this is a topic
0:06:23that has not been broached overtly no he
0:06:26still thinks there's mistake coming well
0:06:28cuz I'm mr. surprise person right um mr.
0:06:32surprise person you brought me a cello I
0:06:33brought you a cello yeah I like
0:06:35surprised I didn't ask for it
0:06:37I'd like to say surprise hey I I was
0:06:42thinking of you I got you this thing I
0:06:44found this thing is what often happens I
0:06:47found this thing I thought of you
0:06:48surprised and Jason Jason you know like
0:06:54I say like you tear in his eye but he's
0:06:56also a stickler for the deal
0:06:58a stickler for the deal we come adjacent
0:07:00fin by just letting it slide he's heat
0:07:03like you he is dealt with the guy in the
0:07:04back room smoke on cigar and peeling off
0:07:06the hundred dollar bills yes he knows
0:07:07where he speaks he knows this whole like
0:07:10oh you're negotiating the record
0:07:12contract well we're giving you a 100
0:07:15percent control over the artwork in
0:07:18exchange for ninety four percent of the
0:07:22creative output Jason loves a lot of
0:07:26people's favorite part really listen we
0:07:29negotiated hard for this one hundred
0:07:32percent control over the artwork and the
0:07:34labels like fine kid Jason knows
0:07:38so Jason sits down with his brand-new
0:07:40bag
0:07:41it's tear-stained bag tucks his napkin
0:07:44into his shirt orders a $65 steak oh
0:07:48that's a nice steak what was a nice
0:07:52steak I have to say so good steak there
0:07:55it's a good steak place not to be undone
0:07:58of course I ordered it
0:07:59$72 take myself you not meet a stone so
0:08:04you know long story short I end up
0:08:07footing the bill for for not a no small
0:08:10amount of lunch I got this computer the
0:08:15bag is gone the bag was not that was no
0:08:18undue burden on me right I that's not
0:08:22like I tearfully parted with the bag I
0:08:24found that bag in a bag in a bag yeah
0:08:28that's the complexity is you both were
0:08:31in some way proffer of current super
0:08:35value to yourself he was not using his
0:08:38desktop computer machine and you were
0:08:40right using the bag in a bag in a bag
0:08:41right okay but now that we can all agree
0:08:45on steak we can all agree that steak is
0:08:48a is a medium of exchange but so anyway
0:08:53now I have this computer this big
0:08:55computer and now it is sitting here on
0:08:57the table but I haven't plugged it in
0:09:00yet so I'm doing this show on my laptop
0:09:02all good okay but it's here I'm looking
0:09:05at it it looks like it looks like an
0:09:07apple doesn't have a Big Apple on the
0:09:09front does and one on the back
0:09:11back it's me it's big it's got its
0:09:13silver it's um it's on a kind of stand
0:09:17that looks like a paperclip
0:09:18sulle you might have what's called an
0:09:20iMac an iMac mm-hmm I think I do if I
0:09:24had my druthers it's what I would be
0:09:26recording on right now is that right yes
0:09:28and circumstances I would be speaking to
0:09:31you on my iMac what are you speaking to
0:09:34me on right now a MacBook which is in
0:09:38the parlance today in my circles
0:09:40sometimes called the MacBook adorable
0:09:41it's very very small and cute and mostly
0:09:44useless unless your iMac is not working
0:09:47and then you plug it in with mini mini
0:09:48dongles and you talk to your friend on
0:09:50the internet for a little while so he's
0:09:52got your running dongles right now oh
0:09:54I'm a dongle country this is one of
0:09:57those part of that current spate of
0:09:59Apple products that are really great as
0:10:01long as you don't use them for anything
0:10:05flawlessly in conditions where that you
0:10:07don't try to do anything useful with
0:10:08them huh yeah no in the iMac I don't
0:10:11know how old your iMac is but like do
0:10:13you have a rough idea like what are we
0:10:14talk about orders of magnitude how old's
0:10:15that thing well old enough that he
0:10:19bought it and then used it long enough
0:10:21that it was sitting on the table at his
0:10:23house and he was like I gotta get rid of
0:10:25this thing so three to five or more
0:10:27years yeah yeah let's put it at let's
0:10:33split the difference at four four and a
0:10:35half years okay it's not really
0:10:38splitting the difference but I that's my
0:10:39guess let's just not begging the
0:10:41question that one drives me crazy right
0:10:43people say begging the question when
0:10:45they really mean raising the question
0:10:46yeah no that's not begging the question
0:10:49mm-hmm what is your opinion about this
0:10:52that's four years
0:10:53what say it's four years old well I can
0:10:55in the fullness of time I will give you
0:10:58an idea what kind of deal you got on it
0:10:59but the truth is that that is a computer
0:11:02that unless it has some kind of problem
0:11:03I mean it's sort of like you know Kramer
0:11:06trading his radar detector to Newman for
0:11:11the crash helmet and neither one of them
0:11:12works right it becomes kind of sad Gift
0:11:15of the Magi if that thing works you
0:11:17might have something kind of good on
0:11:18your hands that you can put on your mp3s
0:11:20on isn't that kind of part of the deal
0:11:21you want all your stuff on a thing I
0:11:22want stuff on a thing but also
0:11:25yeah like I I have a little bit of I
0:11:28mean I don't have anywhere near the
0:11:30computer attachment anxiety that
0:11:34probably I'm guessing 99.9% of the
0:11:39people listening to this program suffer
0:11:40from they have a lot of feelings and so
0:11:43like if my laptop got left somewhere or
0:11:46if it got wiped or if it got stolen or
0:11:50if it was you know or if god forbid
0:11:54sat in the crackheads trunk for a year a
0:11:56satyr crackheads drunk for a year or or
0:12:00if he were to be shot by a policeman or
0:12:03if he were to someone other unfortunate
0:12:08you're seeing like a Theodore Roosevelt
0:12:09type situation like you're up there
0:12:11giving a speech and a gunman takes a
0:12:13crack at you mm-hmm stops the bullet he
0:12:15takes the blow you continue speaking cuz
0:12:17you're all fuckin Theodore Roosevelt
0:12:18that kind of saturation that's right I'm
0:12:20shot by a bullet but i but i apprehend
0:12:23the culprit first of all and then
0:12:25continue with my speech never pausing
0:12:27never pausing okay all right so that's
0:12:30not I don't have that problem what I
0:12:32just have is the problem of a
0:12:34proliferation of boxes yeah but also
0:12:36justice you want to make sure this is
0:12:38just if you turn this thing on and it
0:12:41has a bomb on it or something you know
0:12:43like a sad sad face or something if it
0:12:45doesn't work the hard drives busted or
0:12:46something you know Oh we'll go Jason and
0:12:50I will go back to the start oh yeah I'm
0:12:53sure I mean I I don't want to get a get
0:12:55head in front of our skis on this one
0:12:57but you know Jason's an art dealer and
0:13:00he has a drummer right so these are
0:13:04things we need to keep in mind I don't I
0:13:06don't want to cast aspersions we're
0:13:08living in a more woke and learning time
0:13:11and I don't want to just say things
0:13:12about drummers even though we know it's
0:13:14mostly true it's a cultural thing it's
0:13:16it's it's not see I think it's a
0:13:19difference in culture when you're
0:13:20dealing with the drummer you're
0:13:21absolutely right here absolutely not
0:13:23that they're less intelligent or trust
0:13:27the bull don't you think a lot of it is
0:13:31how a drummer is raised you know it I
0:13:33appreciate that you're trying to show
0:13:35cultural sensitivity well I want to
0:13:37become want to be culturally sensitive
0:13:38I have never I've never walked in and
0:13:41Romer shoes that's right and I imagine
0:13:43they imagine they suffer a lot they're
0:13:44the the brunt of a lot of jokes that are
0:13:46very funny because they're true and
0:13:48you're usually the least useful person
0:13:51in the band including the bass player
0:13:52I'm taken taken together mm-hmm
0:13:56have you ever have to move your drummers
0:13:58drums because they just weren't into it
0:13:59they were talking to somebody doing a
0:14:07lot of heavy lifting in my experience
0:14:08the drummer's in like like a restroom
0:14:11stall and can't figure out how to get
0:14:13out there talking up a bird and you're
0:14:15the one you're the one carrying the
0:14:16floor toms if you know what I'm saying
0:14:18you remember one I had a guy that didn't
0:14:21have that didn't have cases for his
0:14:23drums or cymbals because he didn't
0:14:25believe in them he would carry each is
0:14:27that part of the century John is that
0:14:29sialic it's symbolic no no no okay no no
0:14:32I think other drummers also that was
0:14:35anomalous but but you're you're right
0:14:37there's I mean this is the problem with
0:14:40stereotypes there's a stereotype for a
0:14:41reason huh and talk about that anymore
0:14:44no you can't really it's impossible to
0:14:46say everything that we used to be able
0:14:49to say about drummers yes because it was
0:14:51understood in the culture that we were
0:14:53that we were not only just kidding
0:14:56mm-hmm
0:14:57but also that we were serious that we
0:14:59were serious and it was true yeah I mean
0:15:01it's a kind of kidding that's that's
0:15:02very very serious and a lot of people
0:15:04don't have to live with a drummer they
0:15:06don't have to you know deal with a
0:15:08drummer in a business standpoint or with
0:15:10trying to keep a beat or any of those
0:15:12kinds of things and also they wanted to
0:15:14do they got their crash cymbal that's
0:15:15made out of a you know out of a crosscut
0:15:17saw and that's like a funny thing to
0:15:18them they strap it on to a stand and
0:15:20pretty soon you're carrying that out to
0:15:21the van well there's their bathroom
0:15:24there are drummers and then there are
0:15:26drummer you know you talk about
0:15:28percussionists well I'm talking about
0:15:30you know like the difference between a
0:15:32drummer like I know a drummer I know a
0:15:35lot of drummers sure I'm friends with
0:15:37drummer yeah well but then there are you
0:15:40know then there are drummers that are
0:15:41like right everybody knows what we're
0:15:44talking about here
0:15:49at some point here's the thing let's not
0:15:52get ahead of ourselves you need to get
0:15:53this thing rolling make sure it even
0:15:55just even starts up right that's at
0:15:58first tasks I'm looking at it here in
0:16:00the in the side light and there's a
0:16:02shuts on it and I specifically said to
0:16:05him when he handed it over to me I was
0:16:07like this thing's not covered with
0:16:08schmutz is it it was like no no no no no
0:16:11no I'm not which immediately like yes it
0:16:13was but he's also very he's fastidious
0:16:15enough that I think he sprayed it down
0:16:17with a cleaner that's nice but there's a
0:16:21there's like something on the screen
0:16:23that won't rub off it's like a like a
0:16:26damage like something it's not cracked
0:16:29but it's like it's got some kind of a
0:16:33physical artifact of some kind of damage
0:16:35yeah it's got like a like it looks like
0:16:38you know cuz it's a it's like it's made
0:16:40out of the same stuff as my electric
0:16:43stove your core Cory and stovetop stuff
0:16:47yeah and it looks like somebody put a
0:16:48pot down on it I would not say this I
0:16:53wouldn't put that past the drummer if a
0:16:55drummer made some beans and need a place
0:16:57to put them I could see him putting his
0:16:59his iMac off-axis and using as a kind of
0:17:02a trivet how do we know that he didn't
0:17:12computer machine
0:17:13he was website and and he was like doing
0:17:15about a paddle oh he probably does that
0:17:18adds value because that's what they do
0:17:20that on the dashboard of their car you
0:17:21know you'll see that a lot yeah you'll
0:17:24see that in traffic oh my I think that
0:17:25this actually has a like well wait a
0:17:28minute now I'm rub it I'm rubbing it
0:17:30here no won't rub off careful you don't
0:17:33get too many oils on there you should
0:17:35get up you should get a product I like a
0:17:36lot called woosh you can order this from
0:17:38your retailer they're in town and whoosh
0:17:41you get this nice bottle this is not an
0:17:43endorsement but you get a retweets or
0:17:45not endorsements but you get this bottle
0:17:47of stuff called woosh and it comes with
0:17:48what they call a microfiber cloth and
0:17:50you go since it's you put a little bit
0:17:52of wish on the microfiber cloth and then
0:17:54you gently gently rub it off and that
0:17:56will sometimes restore it to its
0:17:58showroom shine
0:17:59you did with your phone I did that with
0:18:01all the devices the other day is this a
0:18:03thing that I can just use this the
0:18:06spritz and the microfiber cloth that I
0:18:09get with the new pair of glasses
0:18:11possibly there are products that are
0:18:13made for electronic devices and I've
0:18:16learned from friends of mine who have
0:18:18been Jean I at the Apple store that you
0:18:20want to not spritz directly onto the
0:18:22surface of the screen you want to spritz
0:18:24under the microfiber cloth not too much
0:18:25not too little then you rub it off you
0:18:27won't be real channel real so these
0:18:29friends of yours or friends of ours Oh
0:18:31mostly friends of mine I don't think you
0:18:33know that minnijean I do you have you
0:18:34ever met a Jean I do you know people who
0:18:36were geniuses in the growth well I have
0:18:38a friend who is a Corson he was a genius
0:18:41right he was Eric was a genius not ever
0:18:44at the MAC store and not ever at the
0:18:46Apple store but at the MAC store hmm do
0:18:49you remember before there were Apple
0:18:51store oh yeah there were of course you
0:18:53do they were authorized Mac stores they
0:18:55would have a big neon Apple in the
0:18:56window with colors and whatnot him yeah
0:18:58but they also sold other things like
0:18:59RadioShack yes they were independently
0:19:03owned and operated they were like they
0:19:06might have been likes I think you could
0:19:08get like certified but they were doing
0:19:11their own thing they still exist and
0:19:13they're real weird
0:19:15they were always weird it always felt
0:19:17like there was a guy with a gray
0:19:19ponytail mm-hmm who would like had an
0:19:22apple 2e yeah there were a lot of there
0:19:26were people like Eric Corson back in the
0:19:27back doing Mac Mac attacks attacks yeah
0:19:32back him back in the back of Mac tech
0:19:34for Bobby the guy he's probably could be
0:19:38a Gulf War vet but Bobby's the guy with
0:19:39the ponytail and he's writing stuff yeah
0:19:41and it was a great job for Eric because
0:19:44he would say okay guys I'm going on tour
0:19:46and they would take his like milk carton
0:19:51that he sat on has also have detained
0:19:54all of his stuff and they tuck it under
0:19:57the under the workbench and the rest of
0:20:00the guys would you know they were all
0:20:01like back there were backpacking Mac
0:20:04attack Mac attackers him and then he'd
0:20:06come back to work a month later two
0:20:08months later and they
0:20:10milk carton upside-down and all his
0:20:13tools will be in there and he'd sit down
0:20:15and get back to work making Santa's toys
0:20:24feel like any of them had anything
0:20:27valuable this episode of Roderick on the
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0:22:00line and all the great shows I would not
0:22:05leave quarters or weed in the milk
0:22:09carnival no I do that all the time I'm
0:22:11like let's see I've got all these little
0:22:12bits I am and I throw me the milk
0:22:14cartons I'm taking people's quarters
0:22:18yeah but so but yeah so the MAC store
0:22:24god I remember the first Mac store I
0:22:27went to it it felt like a ha felt like a
0:22:30hobby place exactly there was was a big
0:22:32one in town here on 6th on 6th Street I
0:22:34believe called Mac Adam and that was
0:22:37like it was it was the Valhalla of nerdy
0:22:39hobbyist Apple store so they would have
0:22:41software they would have hardware they
0:22:43had many many kinds of devices if you
0:22:45want to get a scuzzy 25 or scuzzy 50 you
0:22:47go there you want to get an Ethernet
0:22:49adapter that's where you go yeah but it
0:22:51always felt kind of they felt kind of
0:22:53shambling especially now compared to
0:22:54what we think of as an Apple store
0:22:56yeah the lighting was very dark and them
0:22:59wasn't it and it was like there was
0:23:01unfinished shingling carpeting often had
0:23:05carpeting carpet carpeting in those in
0:23:07the shells with holes in them like at a
0:23:09hardware store an old hardware store yep
0:23:11I have a friend here that is the
0:23:14assistant manager he's either the
0:23:16assistant to the regional manager or
0:23:18these is the assistant regional manager
0:23:19of an apple store at one of the big
0:23:24malls here in the region oh wow
0:23:27and so I will go visit him sometimes and
0:23:31it used to be that it felt like I got a
0:23:36friend in the diamond business and I'd
0:23:40go and he doesn't have to wear the
0:23:44t-shirt oh so he's like an enlisted man
0:23:48he's a yeah like an officer he's an
0:23:51officer he gets to wear a shirt with the
0:23:52button-down collar that does not
0:23:53indicate that he's a board member
0:23:56okay and you know sometimes I'll go and
0:24:01he won't be there and then I'll see him
0:24:02walking the mall with with an employee
0:24:05giving him giving the employee an
0:24:07employee review so he's not like he's
0:24:12not a low-level operative but he's
0:24:14definitely at the level where if he
0:24:16speaks to lord Vader he may get choked
0:24:19at a distance yeah pray he doesn't alter
0:24:21it further you're talking about second
0:24:22lieutenant you know secondary well but
0:24:24you know a left tenant like not oh I see
0:24:27he's got like a riding crop in a
0:24:28button-down shirt yeah maybe like a
0:24:30jaunty beret
0:24:31and it used to be that you could kind of
0:24:33waltz in there and say like no to mean
0:24:36nudge nudge
0:24:36is your wife a goer yeah does she go and
0:24:39he would it's not like he ever likes
0:24:43Liddy anything oh but he'd say let me he
0:24:46might crack your case without an
0:24:47appointment
0:24:48yeah he'd say let me facilitate that
0:24:49okay like I like a friend in the diamond
0:24:53business well me too oh that's nice to
0:24:55know you know I'll get into a whole line
0:24:57of business that I don't even care about
0:24:58if I have a friend in it
0:25:00well it certainly opens the door I mean
0:25:02I'm like I collect diamonds when did you
0:25:04start doing that oh I had a friend in
0:25:05the diamond but tell me more don't care
0:25:07about diamonds I just ice got into it
0:25:09cuz it's nice to have a pal but the last
0:25:15couple of times he's like yeah there's
0:25:17been a big crackdown from HQ and we
0:25:19don't do anything nice for anybody
0:25:20anymore it's not a very fun place to
0:25:23work right now but you're welcome to
0:25:24come down watch me in please
0:25:27yeah you always come down and be in the
0:25:29store and get treated like a regular
0:25:31person I mean he can still get me a
0:25:33genius he can get me a genius to look at
0:25:35my problem like without waiting for a
0:25:40year that's it I think that part of it
0:25:41like what's happening in the store I
0:25:43don't want to go off on a rant here but
0:25:44it is very ad hoc we're like I
0:25:46fortunately not had that many occasions
0:25:48where I had to take my computer in to
0:25:50get looked at but I had a pretty good
0:25:52record on what it was but you know might
0:25:54be the logic board whatever but you take
0:25:55it in and it is a Death March you got to
0:25:57make an appointment it might be a week
0:25:59before you get appointment and then you
0:26:00go ahead and you still gotta wait it
0:26:02might be an hour you're sitting there no
0:26:04of course it's like a lot of it
0:26:07historically has been somebody with an
0:26:09ancient Mac that might even be out of
0:26:11it's a lot like the coupon situation at
0:26:13Walgreens or people in there and they're
0:26:14like I can't go I don't know what
0:26:16happened the photos on my iPad Mini and
0:26:18like there's a you know and you're gonna
0:26:19walk through all that but nowadays
0:26:20they're having actual problems with
0:26:22their products and it's not a very fun
0:26:24place to work
0:26:25oh they're new keyboards are like bad
0:26:28and they're on the on the laptop so yeah
0:26:30yeah this is a little bit inside
0:26:31baseball but just to give you a feel for
0:26:33this I've had friends that get like a
0:26:35crumb or a hair or something in this
0:26:37tiny little keyboard that has no key
0:26:39travel how would you get a crumb or a
0:26:41hair sometimes a person a sport
0:26:43person has to eat what would you do
0:26:45you'd be eating or something or having
0:26:47hair you're reporting from the show
0:26:49floor or something like that you're
0:26:51having a dumpling but then they have to
0:26:53go through these mandated these court
0:26:56mandated tests that they gotta go
0:26:57through and when the tiger gonna run the
0:26:59Diagnostics John you gotta run the
0:27:01Diagnostics come on you know I feel
0:27:04about diagnostic Diagnostics tell you
0:27:06nothing the diagnosis tell you the
0:27:07Diagnostics don't found nothing I've got
0:27:09six on my skype for a week now
0:27:11have you turned up you're compiling a
0:27:14lot of pee do that but then apparently
0:27:17turns out one of the things that they
0:27:19need to chew part of that once they've
0:27:21run the I guess the like software
0:27:23diagnostics and hardware diet then the
0:27:25Geena genius goes through and has to hit
0:27:28every key on the keyboard and see what
0:27:31it does
0:27:31no wonder it takes a week to get an
0:27:33appointment those guys yeah exactly
0:27:36haven't hasn't somebody I bet you
0:27:38there's there is a rhotic on the line
0:27:40listener who has already invented a
0:27:42machine that hits every key on a
0:27:44keyboard oh you know just for their own
0:27:46amusement they've done it yeah
0:27:48eventually they'll put it on Etsy but
0:27:50for now it's just an articulated finger
0:27:52that hits all the keys like I knew a kid
0:27:54up here whose band was him and a bunch
0:27:59of machines he built to play instruments
0:28:01oh so it was regular it's nice to have a
0:28:03friend it's a nice to have little robot
0:28:07friends and I think he had like I think
0:28:10he took chopsticks and put little little
0:28:13like tissue paper on the end of them and
0:28:17taught it how to play the piano oh and
0:28:19it had machines and the one of them
0:28:22played the bass I think and I don't I
0:28:25saw it a couple of times that it was it
0:28:27was phenomenal
0:28:28I don't know I don't know how hard it
0:28:30would be to tour cuz I think you had to
0:28:32thank you to rebuild it every time I
0:28:36mean isn't it fair to say that ever
0:28:37since the 808 drummers have mostly been
0:28:39optional it's mostly for optics that's
0:28:42that's I have a little box that makes so
0:28:47I'm a yeah I know you're a hobbyist
0:28:49that's why I'm so popular little box
0:28:55table music bye
0:28:57you'd be daddy never sleeps at night for
0:29:04the floor baby laughs this little thing
0:29:06made by boss made the by the boss
0:29:07company and and it just makes drum
0:29:12sounds and I'm a terrible there are so
0:29:14many cool drum machines including the
0:29:15808 I went into a music store don't wait
0:29:18simulator on your freaking phone now
0:29:19yeah but that doesn't make me happy okay
0:29:22I decided those buttons you want to make
0:29:23the patterns do that what I want to do
0:29:26is sit what I want to do is sit on the
0:29:28couch as I've done for 25 years and say
0:29:31to someone sitting at a computer or box
0:29:33can you make it go just keep playing
0:29:37until I tell you I'm not angry anymore
0:29:38just keep trying different things I was
0:29:41I did a recording day one time where the
0:29:44drummer came up finally and said I've
0:29:47played this song 40 times I'm not gonna
0:29:49play it again and I said that's what
0:29:52drummers do yeah they play it over and
0:29:54over and over and he said I've played it
0:29:58perfectly 40 times you you need to get
0:30:01your shit together well and I said
0:30:03here's what tremors do they played 41
0:30:05times yeah you played 42 again I guess
0:30:08how I that's how I my shit together if
0:30:11you had wanted to be in a if you'd
0:30:13wanted to play an instrument that people
0:30:14cared what you thought you would have
0:30:15picked a better one yeah you wouldn't
0:30:17you would have gotten a violin or an
0:30:18oboe or something that people have a lot
0:30:20of respect for but no you're in there to
0:30:22keep playing you're like a mouse in a
0:30:23maze I'll tell you when you found the
0:30:24end of the maze don't you worry you just
0:30:25keep walking I'll tell you when you're
0:30:27done I picked up a chair and I had of
0:30:29course I already had my whip and I put
0:30:31him back in his cage and I said keep
0:30:33fucking playing this you got to know how
0:30:35to kennel a drummer
0:30:36but so I have this box and basically it
0:30:42has an it has two knobs one is tempo and
0:30:45the other is you can change what the
0:30:49pattern is and you change the lit move
0:30:51the knob one thing and it goes and then
0:30:55you move it again and it's like you move
0:30:58it again it's like so it's really it's
0:31:02just tempo and complexity ten tempo and
0:31:05complexity and then there is a menu if
0:31:08you want to go to
0:31:10scroll Scroll scroll Scroll and you can
0:31:13change time signature so the
0:31:16complexities find most drummers you know
0:31:23they'll be able to rip out a little bit
0:31:25of Tom Sawyer until it falls apart but
0:31:27mostly you're gonna go back to 4/4 let's
0:31:28be honest yeah well no see because I
0:31:31like trick I like tricky tricks you talk
0:31:33about drama drummers oh yeah there are
0:31:37some I mean Barrett Martin loves to play
0:31:40in in seven seven sixteen gotcha point
0:31:43Matt Chamberlain like he's a drummer
0:31:44drummer loves to play that guy's playing
0:31:47on a different level he's got Galaxy
0:31:48mind Matt Chamberlain Matt Cameron like
0:31:51Cameron
0:31:52all the great masters tricky dicks
0:31:55anyway so I've got this thing and I just
0:31:58like the way it sounds I run it into an
0:31:59amplifier which is like the that's so
0:32:03the thing itself has Mikey Mike the amp
0:32:05or DDI damn I don't even do that I just
0:32:08sit and I just sit and entertain myself
0:32:16and it really disturbs me that I cannot
0:32:20just I don't even have the technical
0:32:24ability to just make that my sound it is
0:32:29my sound it's the only thing I care
0:32:30about I go into the studio and I'm like
0:32:32well here's my thing that I made and and
0:32:34like a live drummers like oh I can do
0:32:37that and he starts to plan I'm like I
0:32:38kind of just like the sound of my lock I
0:32:41know it's almost like you want a sober
0:32:43reliable grant Hart you and somebody who
0:32:45can come in and like keep it beating you
0:32:47say okay we'll do more or flippity
0:32:49jibbity and then they can do more
0:32:51flippity jibbety but they don't lose the
0:32:52beat but still there's a purity to the
0:32:55to the what the what the krautrock hall
0:32:57for on the floor I kind of know you know
0:32:59before you on the floor beat that's
0:33:01that's a fantastic beat well and this is
0:33:03the thing with making music with other
0:33:05people because there are a lot of times
0:33:07when the bass line that I record myself
0:33:10does didn't didn't didn't didn't didn't
0:33:14didn't didn't didn't
0:33:18[Music]
0:33:20no chord change that let you know like
0:33:23as I'm writing it I'm talking to the
0:33:25bass player who is me and I say I'm like
0:33:34okay listen okay shake Racker okay
0:33:38listen you're not going to do anything
0:33:40in this song except this no no the other
0:33:46instruments are gonna make changes
0:33:48they're going to change chords and stuff
0:33:51the bass is only gonna go didn't didn't
0:33:53didn't didn't didn't didn't do until the
0:33:55song is basically a bass drum with an
0:33:57open e yeah right yeah but it needs to
0:34:00happen it's very crucial to the song if
0:34:03it doesn't happen it's not bass well and
0:34:05it's not yeah all right the song doesn't
0:34:07have the thing and the song doesn't have
0:34:09the D it's your the key thing yes and
0:34:11and the amazing skill that some bass
0:34:14players have is to realize that really
0:34:17to play only one note through the entire
0:34:21length of a song and to still like be in
0:34:24the pocket and make it groove is even
0:34:26harder then moving stuff around because
0:34:29you have to be like didn't didn't didn't
0:34:31and I start thinking about something
0:34:33else if you start thinking about
0:34:35something else yeah then you're gonna
0:34:38wander you're gonna wander away from the
0:34:39tune but if you can really be in that
0:34:43bass really be in that bass moment and
0:34:47just every single one of those dunes
0:34:49matters just as much to you as the one
0:34:52before it I'm the one after Wow
0:34:56basically not get distracted like when
0:34:58the words start you start thinking about
0:35:00like what kind of sandwich are gonna
0:35:01have right and the thing is this is a
0:35:03thing that this is why bass players are
0:35:05often perfectly suited to this because
0:35:08there's not a lot of other things
0:35:10they're gonna think about right right
0:35:11right oh we have that much to think
0:35:13about like where where's my milk carton
0:35:16basically it's kind of rhythmic fidget
0:35:18spinner and its key its key key but
0:35:23pretty soon then you're like pretty soon
0:35:26then you're just you're sitting up there
0:35:28with a bunch of instruments that you
0:35:29made your
0:35:30or you're playing everything through a
0:35:31through a boss pedal into a single
0:35:33amplifier and you're you're like LCD
0:35:35Soundsystem guy except you can't afford
0:35:3725 people onstage with you yeah I don't
0:35:41know people really like that LCD
0:35:42soundsystem guy I like some of their
0:35:44stuff quite a lot drummers music you
0:35:49just did that Merlin thing where where
0:35:52your voice went up an octave person says
0:36:06oh I quite like it
0:36:07oh yeah yeah no I mean like I've played
0:36:12my problem is that like like so many
0:36:15people I came at the base this is no
0:36:18disrespect to the wonderful people who
0:36:20play the bass but I came at the base as
0:36:21a guitar player I'm a very loo Barlow
0:36:23esque bass player where it's like I'm
0:36:25playing a 1 and a 5 and I'm going up and
0:36:28I'm playing a little melody and I'm
0:36:29mostly I'm going boop boop boop boop
0:36:30where I'm trying to be my quiet like I
0:36:32don't I mean to me a bass playing was a
0:36:34hack for me like guitar playing I never
0:36:37like like like you I never bothered to
0:36:39get very good at guitar but I knew my
0:36:40way around I knew what my capabilities
0:36:42were mostly you like and I knew them
0:36:45like if I want to make a silly sounding
0:36:46fake Eddie Van Halen solo I knew how to
0:36:49make that funny but the bass I came at
0:36:51it totally as a hack where it's like
0:36:52okay I understand all these strings are
0:36:53pretty much the same as the lower four
0:36:55strings I can figure that out and then I
0:36:57figured out how to roughly emulate
0:36:58something that wasn't don't wasn't doing
0:37:00a Ramones I wasn't trying to do just
0:37:01what the guitar part was right and then
0:37:04you know as again as a fan of who
0:37:05screwed you I started loving that idea
0:37:07of like counter posing what the bass is
0:37:09doing melodically with the guitar but I
0:37:12still came at it with the way of
0:37:13thinking I think there's a guitar way of
0:37:15thinking and a bass way of thinking and
0:37:17I think they're worried I think they're
0:37:18very different you approach the
0:37:20instrument your role and the
0:37:22capabilities and the place and the song
0:37:24are very different from comparing
0:37:27between a natural bass player and
0:37:29natural guitar player yes that may sound
0:37:31ridiculously obvious until you listen to
0:37:33some guy who picked up bass over the
0:37:35weekend like you like you had to do one
0:37:37time right so no musician would
0:37:42disagree with what you just said but I
0:37:44think most lay people are not aware of
0:37:46how massively different the two
0:37:49instruments are their role is
0:37:51complementary but really a base is
0:37:53closer to drums than it is to a guitar
0:37:54and it's amazing to me that there are
0:37:58lead singers who are bass players
0:38:01because the two things mmm like playing
0:38:04guitar and singing is very natural
0:38:06you're you're throwing the chords down
0:38:09in piles and you're building you know
0:38:13you're building the Lego structure of
0:38:14the song and you're singing in the in
0:38:17between your strums kind of you know
0:38:19you're like and here I go strumming and
0:38:21the strumming and singing in an
0:38:23instrument and I'm singing in and but
0:38:27the bass isn't doing that all you know
0:38:29the bass is like I am holding it down
0:38:32here with the kick drum and to sing over
0:38:37that is SuperDuper different
0:38:39and and you know you see it lead singer
0:38:43bass guys sting and Geddy Lee and Paul
0:38:47McCartney Jack blades Jack blades name
0:38:51[Music]
0:38:53it was yeah Jack blades was he's the see
0:38:57the basis I think Kelly Keegan Kelly
0:38:59Keegan Kelly Kelly Kelly
0:39:01I think Keegan Keegan Michael Kelly
0:39:03Keegan Michael Kelly I think was that
0:39:04was the drummer you got he got brake
0:39:06blanket on home alone
0:39:08which one took job alone one Joe Joe
0:39:11Pesci Joe Pesci Joe Pesci was in a band
0:39:15he was in a band with but he was in a
0:39:17band with somebody else he was in band
0:39:18with like a Joe Montana at one point I
0:39:20think are you telling me Joe Pesci was
0:39:21at home alone your are your guests
0:39:25letting me know I've never seen home
0:39:27alone what it had it had Jodie Foster
0:39:31Wallace i fostered army was a funny name
0:39:39mr. Wallace is a terrific name it was in
0:39:44Joey D and the starlighter's hmm
0:39:47no no this is back in the day and who
0:39:50was he in with this he was in this with
0:39:51somebody else who's famous and it's like
0:39:55it's like a Joe
0:39:56yeah I'm taking off your topic of base
0:39:58yeah yeah well when I started playing
0:40:02the bass as we've recorded this story
0:40:05before of my like jumping into the base
0:40:09as an epic story but I didn't have to
0:40:12sing lead I only had to sing harmony and
0:40:14that's easier it's easier to just be
0:40:16like ah it's very hard for me to play
0:40:21the bass properly and and sing because I
0:40:27just because it's certainly my own songs
0:40:29I did not write them or around the
0:40:31ability to do that
0:40:33and at one point we always were have we
0:40:35always had a hard time figuring out how
0:40:37to play blue diamonds on tour around you
0:40:41switch parts we'd switch around cuz the
0:40:43piano part on that song is not difficult
0:40:46but it's sort of sig singly a thing that
0:40:51I would write and do it's not a thing
0:40:53that you'd say like hey piano player
0:40:54here you go bomp bomp ed above it's just
0:40:57not like a normal it's it's a piano part
0:41:00written by somebody that doesn't really
0:41:02play the piano and so it was we could
0:41:05never figure out how to how to recreate
0:41:06it on stage and so what we ended up
0:41:10doing at one point was I played the bass
0:41:13Erik Corson played the guitar and we
0:41:16just eliminated the piano and I was so
0:41:20terrible at the base we did this for an
0:41:22entire tour I never figured out how to
0:41:24do it and in fact a critic from The
0:41:27Village Voice came to our show in New
0:41:28York and said in the review bar where
0:41:32there's a great band lead singer can't
0:41:34play the bass oh boy
0:41:36but uh put that hasn't Chopin smoked
0:41:39fortunately he only tries to do it once
0:41:42yeah well I I deserved it I deserved it
0:41:47can play your mind
0:41:48kaboom yeah so Joe Pesci was in a band
0:41:54he was friends with Frankie Valli ah and
0:41:58so he was in a band I'm not seeing the
0:42:00name of the pin he was in a band with
0:42:01Frank Vincent so do you remember the
0:42:03movie Goodfellas yes when he says get
0:42:05your shine box yeah that actor
0:42:08was in a band with with a Joseph
0:42:12Pechersky yeah she yep there's photos Oh
0:42:16whose photos go search for Joe Pesci
0:42:18band well I think that she probably
0:42:21means fish that's what I'm gonna guess
0:42:24mm-hmm - fish fish
0:42:29Choi fish
0:42:30it's a it's a Sicilian message it means
0:42:34joy sleeps with the fishes
0:42:36he's Joyce sings with his co-star actor
0:42:42Joe Pesci yeah I didn't know that he was
0:42:45in a show called star time kids oh that
0:42:48was that kids cartoon show by James
0:42:50Brown start time babies look at them
0:42:58they're so amazing their mustaches are
0:43:00so moustachy high now that looks like
0:43:02Tony Orlando is that Tony Orlando
0:43:04oh the two guy it's a Joe Pesci and then
0:43:10Tony Orlando and then dawn but Don it's
0:43:13like the dawn that's funny
0:43:16I like yeah you know what that said my
0:43:19brother my brother and me Joe that yeah
0:43:20that's fun that's yeah yeah it's not a
0:43:25disrespectful thing it's it's
0:43:27self-preservation you got to know what
0:43:28you're in for with these people and this
0:43:30is not to say that every guitar player I
0:43:31mean guitar players mm-hmm if you're
0:43:34just the guitar player even if you like
0:43:35a really good guitar player mm-hmm see I
0:43:38I feel like this is already problematic
0:43:40a lot of what we're saying hmm you know
0:43:50when you watch the Metallica documentary
0:43:54if you were me and you thought you knew
0:43:56what worked in Metallica mm-hmm yeah you
0:43:59know how do you think things worked in
0:44:01Metallica well I bought into the guitar
0:44:04for the practicing musician idea the
0:44:07Kirk Hammett was a wonderful gift that
0:44:09was brought to Metallica who had no idea
0:44:10really what they were doing before then
0:44:12no I mean that's not entirely true but
0:44:14when you think of who in the 80's and
0:44:1690's unimpeachably who is the guitar
0:44:19wizard and probably controlling cool
0:44:22a Metallica if you had to say who in the
0:44:25mythology it would that be James
0:44:28Hetfield really see I came up thinking
0:44:30that it was always Kirk Hammett Kirk
0:44:31Kirk Hammett was always the one getting
0:44:33before the YouTube age we could go in
0:44:35and see who actually plays what parts
0:44:36and does what you know we had Clues we
0:44:39we well we had quizzes you you are
0:44:42talking to pure crazy right now I now I
0:44:44know that because I've seen that you
0:44:46documentary and I've watched the YouTube
0:44:47I knew it but the craziness that you are
0:44:50you are talking pure crazy and I would
0:44:52have said that in 1984 Kirk Hammett yeah
0:44:56what was I think he knows I think a lot
0:44:59of times he doesn't know what key it's
0:45:00in no he was always a dingaling every
0:45:02and everything was played by James James
0:45:05Hetfield well my understanding is that
0:45:08James is the guy who really brings the
0:45:11personality and sound that makes
0:45:13metallica metallica and his rhythm
0:45:15guitar playing is monstrously good which
0:45:19is all of the song that's yes and then
0:45:21you got this guy over here and he's got
0:45:22a block of cheese and he's grating it in
0:45:25some kind of Phrygian mode but he might
0:45:27be a couple of frets off and he just
0:45:29gets a little squiggly seems to fade
0:45:33away you get to the end of that boy and
0:45:35he's he's doing his shredding and it's
0:45:38it gets a little low raga my Mike my
0:45:42experience of Metallica and this is than
0:45:45this I think was every every true
0:45:48because you weren't metal is the thing I
0:45:50would not know I mean it wasn't like a
0:45:53denim jacket guy but I deeply love mini
0:45:55metal bands yes
0:45:57but myself a metalhead I would call
0:45:59myself a college rock guy you were a
0:46:01college rock god that's right and but
0:46:03you were not a denim jacket guy I mean
0:46:07start but like going back up some iron
0:46:09Iron Maiden and Metallica and some Judas
0:46:12Priest and whatever and then into the
0:46:1580s like whatever was on headbangers
0:46:17ball like that's a little later but like
0:46:20no I mean I genuinely like I told you
0:46:21before about my friend Phil and maybe
0:46:23this mixtape of a metal mixtape in 1985
0:46:26- changed my life
0:46:26and had so much great metal stuff on and
0:46:28Steve Lyon open all these doors to go
0:46:30beyond what I knew of as classic rock
0:46:32and that's where I first heard whiplash
0:46:34and
0:46:34shirt fade to black and like you know
0:46:36the trap does rice and all that stuff
0:46:38when you went to through that huge
0:46:40accept phase we were just like all I
0:46:42want to hear is except I believe his
0:46:49name is but I know the singer except who
0:46:54Dirkschneider there were two good
0:46:55musicians in Metallica oh boy too bad
0:46:58musicians in Metallica
0:47:00I think we're probably gonna you know
0:47:02what we're gonna get a lot ladders on
0:47:03this one we're gonna get a lot of
0:47:05letters confirming that there are two
0:47:06good was not really playing drums he was
0:47:12beating on a phone book when you accept
0:47:13the tonality of injustice for all and
0:47:15realized that he was playing on a yellow
0:47:16pages I'll you know you really
0:47:17appreciate that boy could really play
0:47:19some yellow pages it feels like a Bing
0:47:21will ships an album that sounds like
0:47:23that James Hetfield was a person and
0:47:27this happens in music a lot of the time
0:47:29where he's very loyal to his friend his
0:47:32friend was there from the beginning his
0:47:34friend was there as friends started it
0:47:37with him and when the and when you're
0:47:40first starting a band you start a band
0:47:42with whoever's standing around how's it
0:47:44else you know were they from oh yeah
0:47:47something like he's ballet I guess they
0:47:49technically every buddy says they're
0:47:50from LA they're from San Francisco I
0:47:53thought they're from these bands out
0:47:54there from like El Cerrito my thinking I
0:47:55ccr know CCR's from LA what no teleca's
0:48:01from San Francisco but they live they
0:48:05live in fancy Robin Williams houses now
0:48:07but I think they're from I think that
0:48:09for me is BAE well no they I think they
0:48:12are from the East Bay before we Los
0:48:15Angeles in late 1981 when Danish born
0:48:18drummer Lars Ulrich placed an
0:48:19advertisement in the recycler you're
0:48:23saying that Metallica started in LA and
0:48:26then moved to San Francisco them is
0:48:28being from the Oakland area Wow
0:48:31see I don't know I'm really confusing
0:48:33now then we're CCR from I swear to Clara
0:48:35from LA I think come on really yeah
0:48:38how'd that get on the Zant's label
0:48:40that's like good east babe hmm
0:48:42this is really upsetting to me I'm
0:48:44taking you on four point you're gonna
0:48:45tell me about friendship
0:48:46Elsa no see
0:48:48see ours from El Cerrito from the area
0:48:51oh isn't that interesting
0:48:52okay oh well what do you know we have
0:48:56looked around we have that flipped
0:48:58around you know metallic is from El now
0:49:01what about green day the Green Day ban
0:49:03aren't they from like mostly see ours
0:49:04from East Bay Ocala is from LA every day
0:49:08is from no way we're providing mnemonics
0:49:18for future CCR is to East Bay as
0:49:21Metallica is to LA okay okay and journey
0:49:26journey city by the bay started out as a
0:49:30song about la haha did you know that I
0:49:33didn't know that yeah when let's go down
0:49:36the city and the Sun shines on LA and
0:49:38then they flipped it around it took and
0:49:42they turned is what they did
0:49:43well everybody at these terrible 49ers
0:49:46games that aren't even in the city of
0:49:47San Francisco and they're singing along
0:49:48on these songs their song about la
0:49:51jumpers it's much better song about
0:49:53about San Francisco that would have been
0:49:55about la about it already I know the
0:49:59thing is James Hetfield he started this
0:50:02band with this guy cuz the guy started
0:50:05the band apparently Lars was the one
0:50:06that put the ad in who put in the
0:50:07recycler that was him and James was like
0:50:10a teenager and he said yeah sure and
0:50:12then and I'm sure Lars is Danish this
0:50:14was kind of exotic at the time you know
0:50:17it's very metal to be from Denmark
0:50:18Denmark is one of the more metal
0:50:20countries that the dansk is is a very
0:50:25metal and they're not as metal as in
0:50:27Czechoslovakia well James had to know
0:50:37that Lars was an albatross he was a
0:50:39lodestone but he was a he's a man to
0:50:43moil t matters but when they got kirk
0:50:46hammett the only thing that he can do is
0:50:51play a million notes those notes are non
0:50:55melodic those notes are in my estimation
0:50:58as a musician nonsensical
0:51:00yeah he's there he's there Jimmy page a
0:51:02little bit and as far what yeah
0:51:05what do you mean Jimmy pages of genius
0:51:07oh so much Blues so many losses oh my
0:51:12gosh he has so many blues 'as he he's a
0:51:15sloppy cheapskate is what he is he's
0:51:17sloppy yes because he's feeling the
0:51:19blues so intense it's the blues yes he'd
0:51:22be so blue
0:51:23what's John Paul Jones feeling because I
0:51:25think I'm feeling what he feels John
0:51:27Paul Jones is thinking about higher math
0:51:30he's on different maths yeah he's like
0:51:33Tom Schultz he's like salts whose home
0:51:42is destroyed in the recent recent fires
0:51:44r.i.p oh no real oh no that's terrible
0:51:47John it's terrible wait I can't get into
0:51:49that that's just too sad no bummers
0:51:50Charles Schultz's home we're all great
0:51:53laughs
0:51:54rameneh PBP grew all the peanuts there
0:51:56Oh
0:51:58so anyway friendship is important and I
0:52:02think you could agree the Jimmy Page
0:52:04really dragged the band down and a lot
0:52:06of points about Paige being sloppy which
0:52:11is true yes is a it's a bonus that's a
0:52:15blessing
0:52:15it is a blessing because he was he's not
0:52:18he was competing with Emerson Lake &
0:52:20Project the the Emerson Lincoln project
0:52:27era because that's where a lot of people
0:52:31encoded is that the word for about prog
0:52:36rock and it's easy to forget this really
0:52:38good book by Dave waggle about prog rock
0:52:39that's very very good
0:52:40and about the culture of prog rock that
0:52:42continues today mostly on cruise ships
0:52:43but just me forget about this era how
0:52:46influential all that stuff was at the
0:52:48time that's what people aspire to you
0:52:49they wanted to be freaking King Crimson
0:52:51one that's why punk rock had to come
0:52:53along that's that's what they say that's
0:52:55what this one shows that's what they say
0:52:58that's what flea says when they cut to
0:52:59him at the in every document about every
0:53:02classroom in John what does Chuck
0:53:03Klosterman have to say would he be able
0:53:06to come in and give an opinion do you
0:53:07think I put a few words down Martin
0:53:09Scorsese would there be an opportunity
0:53:10for him to be sitting in a chair in his
0:53:12little theater and be able to
0:53:14because you know Isaac is very important
0:53:15to Martin Scorcese he would it would
0:53:20have another opportunity for ya /
0:53:24opining and for for a girl to also be
0:53:27there Oh Dave football with a big smile
0:53:30and he'd say something very charming and
0:53:32everybody would agree I watched his
0:53:33documentary on Netflix now here's
0:53:35another thing is I was watching a
0:53:36program on Netflix and they played a
0:53:39song that I must have heard before
0:53:41because I had physical I used to make
0:53:43out to Physical Graffiti in high school
0:53:44and I owned an LP copy of it in college
0:53:47and I listened to it like fairly often I
0:53:49remember the song in the light the song
0:53:51in the light is a very very good song I
0:53:54had to hear it on a Netflix television
0:53:57streaming program - really really she
0:53:58ate it it was really really good and I
0:54:00hear a song like that I hear a cashmere
0:54:03I hear a song like that and I think I
0:54:04think that's all John Paul Jones oh my
0:54:07god I think I think I think Jimmy's just
0:54:09just Jim is just sitting there counting
0:54:11shekels he shows up he puts on a cape he
0:54:14borrows a cape from Rick Wakeman he
0:54:16shows up and he just he plays some
0:54:17sloppy pentatonix for 10 minutes bananas
0:54:21really you are literally banana took him
0:54:24that live Ron album or both or neither I
0:54:26feel like John Paul Jones clearly a
0:54:29genius clearly a great great great
0:54:33player he's a good is he game no in the
0:54:37sense that like I think he genuinely
0:54:39loves music as he doing I don't think
0:54:43he's he's there to pull birds
0:54:45necessarily to make shekels I think he's
0:54:47partly there just out of a genuine love
0:54:48of how nurten notes on a page like turn
0:54:50into something beautiful but this is the
0:54:52problem he's Rana Klee tragically
0:54:55underused in Led Zeppelin mm-hmm because
0:54:58I do not think he was given the mandate
0:55:02at least very under-recognized I think
0:55:05his tastefulness and like in some ways
0:55:07maybe I don't say he was the pall of the
0:55:09band but I think it's some ways he
0:55:10brought things to that band that made
0:55:12them so much more than what they
0:55:13previously been capable of and will just
0:55:15read it so like he's the piano player or
0:55:17like he played the air bow here or
0:55:18whatever he's very good but he didn't he
0:55:21was not empowered because it wasn't his
0:55:24band that's true if there's if there's
0:55:25anybody in that band that's a hired gun
0:55:27it's him and I don't think that I do not
0:55:31think that the magic of Led Zepplin that
0:55:33you are hearing and attributing to John
0:55:35Paul Jones is actually coming from the
0:55:38fountain of John Paul Jones I mean he
0:55:41does a great job at the things that he
0:55:43does that he he kills those things that
0:55:47were handed to him and I wish that he
0:55:50had had more authority in the band
0:55:52because I know you're doing that thing
0:55:55you're saying okay what did they
0:55:55actually put on the screen like let's
0:55:57set aside all the Chuck Klosterman
0:55:58ization of this like what actually
0:56:00happened in terms of what made it onto
0:56:02the final yeah I don't think that that
0:56:04in the room those moments where where
0:56:08the other dudes
0:56:09we're probably page said okay and then
0:56:12then all this needs to get done and he
0:56:15pushed the big platter of hot turkey
0:56:18dinner over and said like I don't want
0:56:20to think or think about this or do this
0:56:21okay it came back to him like absolutely
0:56:26perfectly done like all that PA all that
0:56:28keyboard stuff it's all him like he's
0:56:30super big is that I think he's the
0:56:32flautist
0:56:33he's the flautist but Jimmy Page stole
0:56:38the chord progression for stairway to
0:56:40heaven but I think it's John Paul Jones
0:56:41that made it work I'm sorry this is
0:56:45fraud we can't put this out there's no
0:56:48way page is the page is the one that is
0:56:51coming up with all the riffs all the t's
0:56:54that you think he's like the Pete
0:56:55Townsend in the band uh yeah well I mean
0:57:00the you because you know about his you
0:57:02know page was like hot session guy he
0:57:06was hot session guy he was a Yardbird
0:57:09Donovan's magic carpet ride I think he
0:57:16played on I think he played on a king
0:57:18song possibly even you really got me
0:57:20it's disputed whether his track made it
0:57:22on to the final but he was on some early
0:57:24Kings singles I think and I you know and
0:57:26he was in the Beatles right yeah he's
0:57:29considered the seventh Beatle seventh
0:57:30Beatle the seventh son of the seventh
0:57:32son mm-hmm that's where the Iron Maiden
0:57:35album comes from there are two good
0:57:38musicians in Led Zeppelin
0:57:41mm-hmm and there are two people who
0:57:46owned Led Zeppelin and made it and made
0:57:49everything and now you're into a Jean
0:57:51and Paul type situation there are two
0:57:53right people in Led Zeppelin who died
0:57:56yes there are two but none of these twos
0:57:59overlap wait I was up one time uh Frank
0:58:05Frank Frank Zeppelin right yeah he died
0:58:08early he's like one he's the Nell Aspen
0:58:10all it's banned he's like the eighth or
0:58:12ninth member of Led Zeppelin he's like
0:58:13the piano player of the Rolling Stones
0:58:15who was in the Rolling Stones from the
0:58:16very beginning but she had a certain
0:58:17Jimmy Stone yeah yeah certain point he
0:58:20got he got put behind the curtain yeah
0:58:21you drive himself an electric bathtub I
0:58:24think that's what happen easily played
0:58:26that pretty ovation teardrop guitar
0:58:27piano uh Rolling Stone
0:58:31it gathers no moss but also a Rolling
0:58:33Stone electric bathtub was actually a
0:58:36great band that's a terrific band yeah
0:58:38no I'm saying that there is there was a
0:58:43guy mm-hmm not Brian Jones talk about
0:58:49it's not not Ian mcLaughlin but one of
0:58:52those it was a piano boy in the Rolling
0:58:54Stones yeah yeah the piano key on please
0:58:58I'm just kissing names at this point no
0:59:00it's Ian Stewart Ian Stewart and he's
0:59:03not he's not the guy from that English
0:59:05band the other English band that's the
0:59:06guy my thing I think it'd be in swayin
0:59:08Stewart Ian
0:59:09who's the guy hits you with your rhythm
0:59:11stick that's Ian Dury he was thinking of
0:59:15Ian Ian McKellen you McCallum Ian
0:59:21McDermott eita Mederma no Roni Ian Loog
0:59:25Oldham Ian Lou gold and he's the one
0:59:27that got sampled by that fan who knocks
0:59:28people down walking down the street
0:59:30that's right all their money money right
0:59:34cuz they got Peter Allen to be their
0:59:36manager that's the guy guys was married
0:59:37to Liza Minnelli and he stole all their
0:59:38rights wasn't that him uh it was the was
0:59:41he married to Liza Minnelli Peter Allen
0:59:43Peter Allen and my baby smiles at me
0:59:45y'all go to Rio who's the guy who stole
0:59:47all the money he said look look look
0:59:48look you guys you're not you're not
0:59:49getting paid right I'm gonna set this
0:59:51straight no that was uh that was dude
0:59:53man it was
0:59:54I was fun his name was Alan fun no it
0:59:59was
0:59:59was
1:00:00Morty it was no I think you're right I
1:00:06think your friendship a friendship is
1:00:08very important but you have to know
1:00:09where to draw the line like say for
1:00:10example you let's just say
1:00:12hypothetically you knew a drummer who
1:00:13really wanted a mistake no please no
1:00:15right right
1:00:16it was that's like Allen Funt yeah Allen
1:00:22Funt doer no I'm talking about Ian
1:00:24Stewart who do you know this story no he
1:00:27was a founding member of the Rolling
1:00:31Stones
1:00:31from the very beginning when they all
1:00:34met on a railroad platform and Mick
1:00:37Jagger was like a platform in economics
1:00:40school that make one economics - he's
1:00:42like hey is that a Muddy Waters record
1:00:43and best pals and they for me is news to
1:00:59me I thought I thought that they meant
1:01:01that a corps Eamon show were Mick had
1:01:03been doing some kind of an undergraduate
1:01:05thesis
1:01:06yeah and Keith of course was a pirate at
1:01:08the time yeah splitting splitting a fact
1:01:11as they were splitting effect okay so
1:01:14this guy he and Stewart was a really
1:01:16really good musician and he was one of
1:01:20the Bros in the band and then Andrew
1:01:24Loog Oldham their original manager said
1:01:27in 1963 right before they became big he
1:01:31was like hey mate because that's how
1:01:34they talk to each other yeah you don't
1:01:36look right oh because he looks kind of
1:01:41like Huey Lewis or he looks like a bloke
1:01:46keyboardist and he really does not look
1:01:50like he's in the Rolling Stones he
1:01:52doesn't and so yes yes or non Rolling
1:01:55Stones shaped face like no matter what
1:01:57he did with his hair couldn't have done
1:01:58it
1:01:59he always was gonna look wrong and so he
1:02:02said and this is the one of the most
1:02:03amazing things I've ever heard he said
1:02:07okay I'll keep playing piano in the
1:02:11Rolling Stones
1:02:12over here Oh No just offstage and
1:02:18everybody was like great and then
1:02:21eventually he was like I'll carry the
1:02:23bags you guys you guys run on ahead and
1:02:27then pretty soon he was like he's like
1:02:30mal Evans meets a girl with a bag on her
1:02:32head that's not very nice
1:02:34he was the road manager okay like my
1:02:37goodness in whatever reason Bret and in
1:02:40whatever how he continued to be in the
1:02:43Rolling Stones and in their operation
1:02:46and continued to play the piano
1:02:47what he's doing is like straight up
1:02:49Cyrano in the wings like he's not a
1:02:52stage he's not acknowledged he's
1:02:53certainly not gonna be in bands photos
1:02:54he plays it on Beggars Banquet he plays
1:02:58on some girls he plays he plays on honky
1:03:02tonk woman he plays the piano oh my all
1:03:05the Rolling Stone songs until they
1:03:07started getting like you know Nicky
1:03:09Hopkins and Billy Preston and stuff to
1:03:11come do but he was those guys were all
1:03:16coming and doing like flashy bits over
1:03:19the top of his key piano that is on
1:03:24every Rolling Stones record so he is the
1:03:26bees in the bane on a heartbreaker none
1:03:29of us have ever heard of him
1:03:30because his face was wrong and Andrew
1:03:35Loog Oldham was like uh sorry I mean you
1:03:41still need a piano player but and you're
1:03:43great and so and it's another one of
1:03:46these you know if you put Keith Richards
1:03:48on a camera and you say like what do you
1:03:50think of Sheryl Crow Keith Richards be
1:03:53like Oh shallow crush she's a fag she's
1:03:56the brightest and so he's an he's in
1:04:01that category of offering a plot it's
1:04:03free in Stuart well no he would he'd be
1:04:05like Oh according to Dawood Aryan he was
1:04:08on honky tonk women look at that Stewart
1:04:10loaded gear into his van drove the group
1:04:11to gigs replaced guitar strings and set
1:04:14up Wasa's drums the way he himself would
1:04:15play them I never ever swore at him
1:04:17Watts says with rueful amazement ya
1:04:19never swore at him I never swore at him
1:04:22once I swore at everybody else
1:04:23is the implication well he
1:04:25reasons I'm sure everyone everyone else
1:04:26that ever setup my drums I swore out
1:04:28let's do heroin in France it'll be fun
1:04:30you guys can live on the other side of
1:04:31the island it'll be great I just I feel
1:04:34like I he played he played on the
1:04:37Rolling Stones best track which is under
1:04:39cover of the night Wow this may need to
1:04:43be a bonus episode Harlem shuffle the
1:04:54empirically greatest Rolling Stones song
1:04:56is rocks off Harlem shuffle and it's got
1:05:01that like it's got that's where we're
1:05:03learning that Brown now that's where I
1:05:04learned that yeah I disagree but yeah
1:05:06the sunshine towards the daylights out
1:05:08of me
1:05:08everyone is entitled to their thing
1:05:12that's the thing about the internet now
1:05:14the O opinion is different from any
1:05:16other all all animals are alike we're
1:05:23all on equal footing at this point I
1:05:24have what feels like at this point every
1:05:26opinion is the same that your fear
1:05:29feeling that rocks off is the best
1:05:31Rolling Stone song yeah
1:05:33which in the past would have been
1:05:35demonstrably false now that science
1:05:39doesn't matter anymore
1:05:40now that could be just as it could be
1:05:44taken as just as true as my opinion that
1:05:46sway is the greatest Rolling Stone song
1:05:48sway sway is a very good song which is
1:05:52totally true unimpeachably that's got a
1:05:55groove it's got a groove to it oh oh
1:05:57breaks my heart still every time yeah
1:06:00and it feels like they're playing like a
1:06:01little bit behind the beat a little bit
1:06:03it's got a what girl songs dance some
1:06:06good songs they had some good songs for
1:06:08sure
1:06:08The Rolling Stones did yeah they do well
1:06:10I yeah you know there are no Beatles
1:06:14well now now what about nobody's there
1:06:18no Hitler they're somewhere in between
1:06:19what about Roger Daltrey's inferiority
1:06:21complex
1:06:22do you ever dwell on that I think it is
1:06:24justified okay
1:06:28maybe it right there