Roderick on the Line

Ep. 274: "Lord Sword"


00:00:06   hyejeong hi Marilyn how's it going good [TS]

00:00:11   this is so weird this is so weird [TS]

00:00:14   there's so many people here and I can't [TS]

00:00:17   get sick I cannot be sick don't blow [TS]

00:00:22   your flu on Marilyn I tried to play it [TS]

00:00:25   off legit but I've been fucking Howard [TS]

00:00:27   Hughes all night everything is literally [TS]

00:00:30   asses and literally elbows very nice to [TS]

00:00:32   meet you shall we do the bump [TS]

00:00:34   I made him hug me and I actually was so [TS]

00:00:38   sick three days ago you were so I was so [TS]

00:00:41   sick my daughter threw up on me as kids [TS]

00:00:45   do I don't know it's lovely when they do [TS]

00:00:47   it it's so sweet yeah when you're a [TS]

00:00:49   parent cherish those moments and someone [TS]

00:00:51   had been feeding her Cheetos so it was [TS]

00:00:52   like a thing that was never gonna come [TS]

00:00:54   out [TS]

00:00:54   and then 60 hours to the minute later [TS]

00:00:59   mm-hmm I felt really bad inside but [TS]

00:01:02   unlike a little child I refused to throw [TS]

00:01:05   up because I'm a big boy and so I fought [TS]

00:01:10   it just valiantly fought it for 12 [TS]

00:01:13   straight hours of just like misery so [TS]

00:01:17   you were on the verge that you knew that [TS]

00:01:20   you could have some did you think it was [TS]

00:01:21   gonna be relief or would you be so mad [TS]

00:01:23   at yourself for giving up that it [TS]

00:01:24   wouldn't even feel good at a certain [TS]

00:01:25   point I wanted the relief and then I [TS]

00:01:28   could not what about what about [TS]

00:01:30   downstairs was Italian upstairs not for [TS]

00:01:32   it was one of those things that could go [TS]

00:01:34   either direction standing at the [TS]

00:01:35   crossroads yeah and get angry cthulhu [TS]

00:01:39   inside you can't decide I'll decide [TS]

00:01:41   which way I'm going [TS]

00:01:42   don't you worry about that the devil was [TS]

00:01:43   there it wanted to look like it under [TS]

00:01:45   George he came up to Manhattan and there [TS]

00:01:50   were a few times where I was like this [TS]

00:01:51   is it I'm gonna throw up and I went yeah [TS]

00:01:54   and nothing and then finally finally at [TS]

00:01:57   the end of the night I said goodbye to [TS]

00:01:59   everybody good night I'll see you guys [TS]

00:02:00   tomorrow [TS]

00:02:01   went up to the room and the people in [TS]

00:02:04   the five hotel rooms around mine all [TS]

00:02:07   called the fire department [TS]

00:02:10   because I was just like there appears to [TS]

00:02:15   be some kind of a wraith a portal open [TS]

00:02:21   to the upside down eatos you know yeah [TS]

00:02:27   kids are inconsiderate about that kind [TS]

00:02:29   of stuff I can't get sick it can't [TS]

00:02:32   happen I've had I'm not but like I know [TS]

00:02:35   how I know where this is I don't know [TS]

00:02:36   where this has been the thing about the [TS]

00:02:38   flu and they're saying about the H 2 & 3 [TS]

00:02:40   I mederma get it right getting that [TS]

00:02:42   right any biologist named MH 2 & 3 thank [TS]

00:02:45   you a big fan and even their last three [TS]

00:02:48   albums it's a real bad one and you know [TS]

00:02:52   you can't you can't inoculate against it [TS]

00:02:54   it just comes and it does what it wants [TS]

00:02:56   with you it takes you and it's in its [TS]

00:02:57   meaty paws yes and I yeah well when the [TS]

00:03:03   big flu comes when the when the disaster [TS]

00:03:06   flu comes what are we going to do like I [TS]

00:03:11   don't care about other people I mean us [TS]

00:03:13   do you think you think we should work [TS]

00:03:15   out a plan and how do we survive yeah do [TS]

00:03:17   you is that one you just go home and you [TS]

00:03:19   say I'm not going to work for a month [TS]

00:03:21   six months I feel like the last week has [TS]

00:03:23   demonstrated a lot of things about ill [TS]

00:03:25   prepare how ill-prepared we are on so [TS]

00:03:27   many levels in this country for so many [TS]

00:03:29   different things my daughter and I had [TS]

00:03:30   had a nice day at the Museum [TS]

00:03:31   doot-doot-doot to do I pick up my phone [TS]

00:03:34   oh my god Hawaii had this whole thing [TS]

00:03:37   happened and then my favorite part of [TS]

00:03:39   that was the headlines that were like [TS]

00:03:40   this message accidentally went out and [TS]

00:03:43   lots of people panicked I was like [TS]

00:03:45   that's not panicking panic is you think [TS]

00:03:48   you might be at acumen like they holy [TS]

00:03:52   shit my kabobs gonna suck I need to do [TS]

00:03:55   an insta card that's panicking you will [TS]

00:03:59   die in 35 minutes from missile I [TS]

00:04:01   wouldn't call that panicking I call it I [TS]

00:04:03   talk to my daughter but it's do you [TS]

00:04:04   think that's real normal if we find out [TS]

00:04:06   we're gonna die in 34 minutes like yeah [TS]

00:04:08   that would suck I think panic and [TS]

00:04:09   fucking hard if there's one place in the [TS]

00:04:12   world that should not have a nuclear [TS]

00:04:15   warning system its Hawaii well how can [TS]

00:04:17   we help them what are you gonna say get [TS]

00:04:19   on your [TS]

00:04:20   recycle and drive real fast around like [TS]

00:04:23   it's coming in the roosters well shave [TS]

00:04:27   the shave ice like with air everything [TS]

00:04:30   is literally outside they can't get the [TS]

00:04:33   can't get the roosters to stop crowing [TS]

00:04:35   how are they gonna stop a bomb I didn't [TS]

00:04:37   mean it in the best possible way now [TS]

00:04:38   it's a ping pong there's no stopping it [TS]

00:04:40   no no it's not pimple but I'm gonna run [TS]

00:04:43   to a different Island if there's a tidal [TS]

00:04:45   wave alarm it makes sense because [TS]

00:04:46   there's always somewhere in Hawaii that [TS]

00:04:48   you can go up that's right every one of [TS]

00:04:50   those is an island that the Big Island [TS]

00:04:52   the biggest yes this is the big it has [TS]

00:04:55   the two uppers two places and all of [TS]

00:04:57   Hawaii is that right yeah yeah big big [TS]

00:04:59   big ups yeah but so when the when the [TS]

00:05:05   tidal wave alarm goes off which is like [TS]

00:05:06   wow its klaxon you're like oh yeah but [TS]

00:05:10   the bomb it's like kiss your ass [TS]

00:05:14   good-bye yeah yeah no that's not good so [TS]

00:05:17   what you think we should have a plan so [TS]

00:05:18   like we like to think we have a plan [TS]

00:05:20   because if you have the earthquakes here [TS]

00:05:21   in the area and that's why we had one I [TS]

00:05:27   was sitting there watching Netflix is [TS]

00:05:31   that a very old couch as you know [TS]

00:05:33   squeaky scream a literally makes that [TS]

00:05:34   same and I thought this is it this is it [TS]

00:05:38   because we have not gotten reproduces [TS]

00:05:41   the last time we got prepared for [TS]

00:05:42   hurricane which is when we did what they [TS]

00:05:43   said on NPR and we filled the emergency [TS]

00:05:46   bucket which is what's your college you [TS]

00:05:48   get a bucket you can get a garbage can [TS]

00:05:49   you seal it you fill it full of water [TS]

00:05:51   one day we went out there and literally [TS]

00:05:52   everything was mildewed the water [TS]

00:05:54   apparently I went into some kind of a [TS]

00:05:55   Synecdoche New York fugue state and [TS]

00:05:57   didn't realize that I had not checked on [TS]

00:05:59   the emergency bucket for three years [TS]

00:06:01   everything was blue it might as well [TS]

00:06:03   have been in Hawaii none of it was good [TS]

00:06:05   the bed thing the tent the fake bed the [TS]

00:06:06   fake tent the faint radio all of it gone [TS]

00:06:08   yeah I feel utterly unprepared I need to [TS]

00:06:10   start over I need to reboot this is one [TS]

00:06:13   of the things that people that are [TS]

00:06:14   storing a large amounts of cash I need [TS]

00:06:18   to remember well that's bad it goes bad [TS]

00:06:21   okay mice like to eat cash you'll get to [TS]

00:06:25   lot you get the mold in the cash you'll [TS]

00:06:27   get the the lime in the coconut you get [TS]

00:06:28   it all shake it all around [TS]

00:06:30   and and so if you're you got it you got [TS]

00:06:32   to put the cash in some into some rap [TS]

00:06:35   then you could put the rap into some you [TS]

00:06:37   put some you dip it in wax okay and so [TS]

00:06:40   you got to protect your cash same is [TS]

00:06:42   true with sous-vide things you suck it [TS]

00:06:44   out take the air out that's right right [TS]

00:06:45   you get your spoons your toothpicks your [TS]

00:06:47   cash that's right to do with German [TS]

00:06:50   bearer bonds German bearer bonds and [TS]

00:06:53   coffee thing is ladies and gentlemen the [TS]

00:06:55   FB I was the one who was an Eddie Murphy [TS]

00:06:59   floor where they put the stuff in coffee [TS]

00:07:00   so you couldn't smell the drugs wasn't [TS]

00:07:01   that any Murphy thing that was the [TS]

00:07:03   Beverly Hills Cop okay then what was the [TS]

00:07:05   German what was the German bearer bonds [TS]

00:07:06   that was that like every other move oh [TS]

00:07:08   that was the greatest Christmas movie of [TS]

00:07:10   all time die hard [TS]

00:07:11   now I heard that was a pretty mixed [TS]

00:07:14   response man I feel like that's a meme [TS]

00:07:17   and everybody's like played out played [TS]

00:07:20   out meme so have you seen this have you [TS]

00:07:24   seen the video the fella who gets real [TS]

00:07:25   frustrated at work and he knocks over [TS]

00:07:27   his computer monitor it's really quite [TS]

00:07:29   funny it's called bad day my mom of [TS]

00:07:33   course has a plan which is which is that [TS]

00:07:37   you have to eat through your disaster [TS]

00:07:39   food and be replenishing your disaster [TS]

00:07:42   food in the wake of your own consumption [TS]

00:07:44   of priorities almost like the power went [TS]

00:07:46   out right so to shut down all the [TS]

00:07:47   popsicles before the ice goes away when [TS]

00:07:50   she moved out of her house she showed up [TS]

00:07:51   at my house with duffel bags full of [TS]

00:07:57   cornmeal and cans hey Johnny cake can't [TS]

00:08:03   ya like just all this stuff that is that [TS]

00:08:05   is her blend of disaster requirements to [TS]

00:08:08   feed the neighborhood because she feels [TS]

00:08:11   like if you feed the neighborhood that's [TS]

00:08:13   60 people that won't be like Cormac [TS]

00:08:15   McCarthy meets Dickens it's just gonna [TS]

00:08:17   be all kinds of really unpleasant food [TS]

00:08:19   that nobody wants like it's always [TS]

00:08:21   emergency food you buy all this shit [TS]

00:08:24   that you would never in a million you're [TS]

00:08:27   like kippered sardines and you're like I [TS]

00:08:30   don't even know what any of those things [TS]

00:08:31   are I think she feels like if you have a [TS]

00:08:33   fish fry for the neighborhood okay [TS]

00:08:35   they don't assault your citadel quite as [TS]

00:08:36   rapidly and maybe they [TS]

00:08:39   will form a first line of defense [TS]

00:08:40   against the the people in the neighbor [TS]

00:08:42   and that's something to offer [TS]

00:08:44   yeah so the johnnycake they're like you [TS]

00:08:46   know you can't assault the Citadel of [TS]

00:08:48   johnnycake lady right and then they they [TS]

00:08:50   fight off the zombies for you that's her [TS]

00:08:52   whole plan but she moved all that shit [TS]

00:08:55   into my barn cuz she doesn't have a [TS]

00:08:56   house anymore and she told your book I [TS]

00:08:59   think she's in your barn sounds like [TS]

00:09:01   such a fire trap at this point no no no [TS]

00:09:03   does that Johnny cake won't burn burn [TS]

00:09:10   [Music] [TS]

00:09:13   yeah it's true everything was blue here [TS]

00:09:18   did you follow me you follow me they [TS]

00:09:19   tell you that you get a garbage can from [TS]

00:09:21   the Home Depot that has the latches on [TS]

00:09:23   it [TS]

00:09:23   take it off put all your stuff in there [TS]

00:09:25   that's all fake stuff the read is a [TS]

00:09:27   piece of shit it's not really gonna [TS]

00:09:28   charge your phone grow up [TS]

00:09:29   you get to get these beds you'd never [TS]

00:09:31   want to sleep when you get a tent that's [TS]

00:09:32   obviously gonna be users like oh it's [TS]

00:09:33   really cute [TS]

00:09:34   it looks like a McDonald's bag and it's [TS]

00:09:35   got a rope and like that's we're gonna [TS]

00:09:36   serve families gonna sleep in that and [TS]

00:09:38   then all these little things that you [TS]

00:09:39   looks like you bought at the Air and [TS]

00:09:40   Space Museum as a gift for a kid you [TS]

00:09:43   don't like right [TS]

00:09:44   oh it's astronaut ice cream whatever [TS]

00:09:46   like that's your food and like none of [TS]

00:09:49   that stuff's that I would eat I you know [TS]

00:09:50   I look I should put like a clam chowder [TS]

00:09:52   in there or something some beans [TS]

00:09:53   something I would really enjoy I don't [TS]

00:09:55   think I've ever had a johnnycake four [TS]

00:09:57   hundred cans of chili is what's in mine [TS]

00:09:59   [Laughter] [TS]

00:10:05   you're gonna want it you're gonna want [TS]

00:10:07   to not go there forever this is Ben this [TS]

00:10:13   is just to be clear this is the cans are [TS]

00:10:15   blue they're live literally been in a [TS]

00:10:17   garbage can [TS]

00:10:17   since it's the old it's are you familiar [TS]

00:10:20   with the jim bakker buckets the jim [TS]

00:10:23   bakker buckets I am familiar with Jim [TS]

00:10:24   Baker buckets I know Jim Baker from back [TS]

00:10:26   in the day from Jim and Tammy Lee Jim [TS]

00:10:29   Tammy Faye Tammy Faye Tammy Lee Who am I [TS]

00:10:31   thinking of who wants to stand by your [TS]

00:10:32   man Jim Baker [TS]

00:10:33   Tammy Lee had a television show and she [TS]

00:10:35   was married oh she was married to Regis [TS]

00:10:38   Philbin okay I know he made Regis [TS]

00:10:40   Philbin leave Tammy who was in fact the [TS]

00:10:44   winningest General of the Civil War [TS]

00:10:47   give me that again we just openly we [TS]

00:10:51   just felt been late yeah okay something [TS]

00:10:53   either would run through the airports [TS]

00:10:54   and the commercials that was that's BJ [TS]

00:10:57   BJ from Sausalito no he had the bear [TS]

00:11:00   okay PJ PJ Honeycutt in his best friend [TS]

00:11:03   Bear okay I remember that story that was [TS]

00:11:04   a good story but you know Jim and Tammy [TS]

00:11:07   and you and but that didn't extend to [TS]

00:11:09   knowing the buckets or just lost it for [TS]

00:11:11   a while I lost Cena yeah I was coming up [TS]

00:11:14   at a time when there was it was big [TS]

00:11:15   pastor as we used to call it and this [TS]

00:11:17   was when I looked in Sarasota there was [TS]

00:11:19   a guy who who owned a dog track near [TS]

00:11:22   where I went to school I'm going [TS]

00:11:23   somewhere with this gather round [TS]

00:11:25   children this is the guy when Oral [TS]

00:11:28   Roberts said that if he didn't get hush [TS]

00:11:30   money from somebody God would take him [TS]

00:11:33   and this guy I think gave him some money [TS]

00:11:35   because of that he had your Jim Baker's [TS]

00:11:37   he had your Jimmy Swaggart you had your [TS]

00:11:39   ernest angley who liked to heal people [TS]

00:11:40   by not gonna over kind of heavy guy he [TS]

00:11:42   had that now Jim Baker today I lost the [TS]

00:11:44   thread for awhile now he's back he's got [TS]

00:11:45   no hair a beard in a bucket that's right [TS]

00:11:47   and he's selling buckets right and left [TS]

00:11:48   if anybody doesn't know he's a prepper [TS]

00:11:50   is it he's prepping he's a prepping he's [TS]

00:11:52   prepping [TS]

00:11:53   I think he's prepping for I'm not sure [TS]

00:11:55   what he's prepping for it seems like he [TS]

00:11:57   maybe he leaves that part out [TS]

00:11:58   how's your eschatology my eschatology [TS]

00:12:01   yeah I mean are you like pretty good [TS]

00:12:03   with understanding how the end days work [TS]

00:12:04   oh yeah pretty much I mean I'm assuming [TS]

00:12:07   they're know about the millennium I know [TS]

00:12:09   about okay you know that one that [TS]

00:12:10   already went and she stole your [TS]

00:12:13   underwear no no I mean after that I mean [TS]

00:12:17   after the rat come on any Church of [TS]

00:12:20   Christ in the house you got so first you [TS]

00:12:23   can you guys you got your ass get this [TS]

00:12:25   rapture over here all of a sudden their [TS]

00:12:27   answer whole bunch of plants like Toyota [TS]

00:12:29   Tacomas are empty pants pants pants [TS]

00:12:31   that's crying girl pants pants pants [TS]

00:12:33   pants pants [TS]

00:12:34   old pervert right but the pants are down [TS]

00:12:37   everybody's gone that is the first wave [TS]

00:12:39   is gonna trigger the first elevator to [TS]

00:12:41   have them take some up now I'm trying [TS]

00:12:42   might have the order a little mixed up [TS]

00:12:43   LeMat a little behind masks atala G I [TS]

00:12:45   think there's a time though you have [TS]

00:12:47   visitors like that there's help me out [TS]

00:12:48   on this I know eventually you got heaven [TS]

00:12:50   and in between you got the Millennium [TS]

00:12:51   you got was a thousand years on earth [TS]

00:12:54   that's right I get this is the sign of [TS]

00:12:55   the beast [TS]

00:12:56   right [TS]

00:12:57   right so if all of their collectively [TS]

00:12:59   just go suck Sarah and then there's the [TS]

00:13:01   disco comes back and a lot of people [TS]

00:13:03   don't like new orders technically a [TS]

00:13:04   disco ban but a lot of that was very it [TS]

00:13:06   was very homophobic well it wasn't just [TS]

00:13:08   about baseball they were named after [TS]

00:13:10   comfort women is that right now what do [TS]

00:13:12   i division well the event yeah third [TS]

00:13:15   base now the thing is I don't know what [TS]

00:13:17   kind of prepping is is it a doomsday [TS]

00:13:18   prep an apocalypse prep whatever it is [TS]

00:13:20   you're gonna have your beans you're [TS]

00:13:21   gonna have your fake tent you're you're [TS]

00:13:23   grinding radio what's gym bigger put in [TS]

00:13:26   one of those Bibles my assumption is [TS]

00:13:28   that they are that there are more [TS]

00:13:30   Calvinists about it and they feel like [TS]

00:13:32   they're the elect right so they're gone [TS]

00:13:34   in the first wave so I don't know what [TS]

00:13:36   they're prepping for maybe they're [TS]

00:13:37   leaving that for their cousins and stuff [TS]

00:13:39   that didn't actually a super good idea [TS]

00:13:42   if you're making your own bucket if you [TS]

00:13:43   roll your own for your bucket your house [TS]

00:13:45   stuff that you enjoy in it hmm maybe [TS]

00:13:48   there's a White Ribbon bucket it's for [TS]

00:13:49   the people you don't like maybe so much [TS]

00:13:51   my question for you is once you've found [TS]

00:13:53   the blue bucket once you've found your [TS]

00:13:54   bucket hot-glue mmm [TS]

00:13:56   did you just abandon the whole idea [TS]

00:13:58   you're like a fucking it's so easy when [TS]

00:14:00   you're not thinking about it and then [TS]

00:14:01   one night you're watching TV you're like [TS]

00:14:02   I really need to get on this let's see [TS]

00:14:04   KQED every year when we give Lana kqd [TS]

00:14:06   kqed.org you can go give money they do [TS]

00:14:08   good work that's right Michael Krasny [TS]

00:14:09   MRA and dorks [TS]

00:14:14   they actually literally they're big [TS]

00:14:16   premium one eight hundred nine eight [TS]

00:14:18   seven eight and they do this every year [TS]

00:14:20   they go once again we are offering the [TS]

00:14:23   total survival bucket this is a [TS]

00:14:26   five-gallon bucket filled with [TS]

00:14:28   everything that your family will need [TS]

00:14:30   for three days plus a toilet seat that [TS]

00:14:35   you put on to the five gallon bucket [TS]

00:14:36   because presumably in the future the [TS]

00:14:39   people who were left behind when they [TS]

00:14:41   take your shit are going to have to [TS]

00:14:42   empty five gallons worth of supplies [TS]

00:14:44   that is everything I've left on the [TS]

00:14:45   planet so they can shit in the bucket [TS]

00:14:46   I'm guessing then you don't have water [TS]

00:14:48   to clean it out maybe it comes with a [TS]

00:14:50   special liner I'll have to ask KQED [TS]

00:14:52   that's not a prepper thing that's just [TS]

00:14:54   more like a liberal that's a liberal [TS]

00:14:56   fantasy kind of thing I mean three days [TS]

00:14:58   is exactly enough time to really feel [TS]

00:15:03   your death [TS]

00:15:05   and then rise some people could you [TS]

00:15:10   allow it three days I mean I feel like [TS]

00:15:11   if you what your plan needs to be how do [TS]

00:15:14   I get the hell out of here for good how [TS]

00:15:16   do I leave these other suckers be high [TS]

00:15:18   on it just like all sit indian-style [TS]

00:15:19   around a three-day bucket and life watch [TS]

00:15:22   it go down the eldritch horror [TS]

00:15:28   maybe we should agree that one person's [TS]

00:15:30   bucket is used for this in one person's [TS]

00:15:32   bucket you know that's why all those [TS]

00:15:34   people in Montana have so many guns [TS]

00:15:36   because they feel like our three-day [TS]

00:15:38   plan is get from here to there is like [TS]

00:15:41   the the guy getting chase for the tiger [TS]

00:15:43   he says I don't need to be faster than [TS]

00:15:45   the tiger I just need to be faster than [TS]

00:15:46   you yeah that's on the Montana flag and [TS]

00:15:49   there's someone shooting someone else in [TS]

00:15:51   the head execution-style I was having I [TS]

00:15:52   was having dim sum with Ben Harrison and [TS]

00:15:54   that was his fortune cookie two days ago [TS]

00:15:57   you don't have to be faster than the [TS]

00:15:58   bear except it was it was one of those [TS]

00:16:01   over over long fortunes I was like now I [TS]

00:16:03   don't have to be faster than the bear [TS]

00:16:05   you just have to be faster than your [TS]

00:16:06   other friend who is not as fast as the [TS]

00:16:08   mayor the lottery numbers on the back [TS]

00:16:10   did have a lot of notes I got a lot of [TS]

00:16:12   fucking problems with fortune cookies [TS]

00:16:14   they're too long too many of them are [TS]

00:16:15   aphorisms and not actual fortunes right [TS]

00:16:18   or good you are a nice person [TS]

00:16:19   no I'm not that's not a fortune fuck [TS]

00:16:21   that there's a fortune cookie factory [TS]

00:16:23   like a famous fortune cookie factory [TS]

00:16:25   the fifth famous fifth famous fortune [TS]

00:16:28   cookie factory in the state was [TS]

00:16:31   fortunately factory yeah is in Fillmore [TS]

00:16:36   450 it's it's on Fillmore San [TS]

00:16:39   Francisco's Chinatown service a good [TS]

00:16:41   Chinatown is that right [TS]

00:16:42   yeah you can go I'm gonna get a full [TS]

00:16:45   drone you get you get a tour [TS]

00:16:47   [Music] [TS]

00:16:57   although you're gonna pull a second Oh [TS]

00:17:00   Merlin I just did a shields and Yarnell [TS]

00:17:02   version of I guess making a fortune [TS]

00:17:05   cookie right on his dick it was really [TS]

00:17:07   weird fifth largest fortune for cooking [TS]

00:17:09   factor you think that's right right in [TS]

00:17:10   the Chinatown it's right there and you [TS]

00:17:12   were this is city the heart of the city [TS]

00:17:13   where it all converges that's right [TS]

00:17:14   although a lot of people don't know this [TS]

00:17:16   fortune cookie was actually a Japanese [TS]

00:17:17   invent turns out yeah sorry [TS]

00:17:23   there's no good asshole okay Logan [TS]

00:17:29   Roderick Robinson science ruin and shit [TS]

00:17:33   for me [TS]

00:17:33   I thought Squatch isn't real showed up [TS]

00:17:36   this is San Francisco you guys turns out [TS]

00:17:38   moment at least we live for the turns [TS]

00:17:43   out people want to get their money's [TS]

00:17:44   probably what it turns out inside if it [TS]

00:17:46   turns out inside if it turns out we want [TS]

00:17:47   a full complement if you get five [TS]

00:17:49   hundreds Calder Gladwell so it's a [TS]

00:17:54   reason it's called hidden brain that was [TS]

00:18:01   almost a kind of a wave moan if you're [TS]

00:18:07   gonna decide to live when others are [TS]

00:18:09   dying you're gonna have to make so you [TS]

00:18:12   can have to prepare even if it's not [TS]

00:18:14   strictly prepping preparing you're still [TS]

00:18:15   gonna have to think ahead you got a and [TS]

00:18:17   you're gonna have to like stay caught up [TS]

00:18:18   you're gonna have to make this part of [TS]

00:18:19   what you do in the same way that I rue [TS]

00:18:21   the removal of compost from our house [TS]

00:18:23   every day to go put it in the green [TS]

00:18:24   bucket like you're gonna have to [TS]

00:18:26   practically think about your stuff like [TS]

00:18:27   that it's gonna be like having a fish if [TS]

00:18:29   you want to live you need to think about [TS]

00:18:31   your stash you can make sure your cash [TS]

00:18:32   stays dry your fortune cookies are [TS]

00:18:34   well-defined right and that your water [TS]

00:18:36   is not blue and that none of your [TS]

00:18:38   money's expired the number one thing you [TS]

00:18:39   have to ask yourself is do you want to [TS]

00:18:43   live over on the other side of the - [TS]

00:18:45   apocalypse will you put into it what's [TS]

00:18:47   needed in order to live well I've told [TS]

00:18:49   you this story right well I used to work [TS]

00:18:51   at the magazine store and there were a [TS]

00:18:53   magazines about if you if you wanted to [TS]

00:18:55   buy a castle in scotland and i [TS]

00:18:57   absolutely wanted a castle in scotland [TS]

00:18:59   it's not a thing that everybody wants [TS]

00:19:01   but some people wanted that's right in [TS]

00:19:02   the sweet spot let's hear a round of [TS]

00:19:04   applause people who want a hot [TS]

00:19:07   let's hear a round of applause from [TS]

00:19:09   people who know they don't want a castle [TS]

00:19:11   in scotland oh the thing about a castle [TS]

00:19:15   in Scotland I wanted one I wanted one I [TS]

00:19:16   wanted one and then I started you know [TS]

00:19:18   populating my imaginary Castle in [TS]

00:19:20   Scotland with all the things you're [TS]

00:19:21   gonna put in there a big billiard [TS]

00:19:23   mysteries you're gonna buy you're gonna [TS]

00:19:25   buy a lot of chandeliers put them [TS]

00:19:26   everywhere you're gonna have like the [TS]

00:19:29   Hall of chandeliers you might have to [TS]

00:19:30   put in any report kalus right you're [TS]

00:19:33   gonna get a trebuchet or I don't know [TS]

00:19:35   it's got a spork all this it's not [TS]

00:19:36   something you can rely on but then I [TS]

00:19:37   started reboard the arrow holes got [TS]

00:19:39   reboard oohs that's right you got a you [TS]

00:19:41   got to put to repoint the the the [TS]

00:19:43   masonry yeah yeah but then I started to [TS]

00:19:46   imagine oh and then you can have your [TS]

00:19:47   own heraldic crest made that's like [TS]

00:19:53   named in a band I don't care what genre [TS]

00:19:55   it is and I can't play an instrument I [TS]

00:19:57   gotta come up with a name so you would [TS]

00:19:58   have to you need a name for your castle [TS]

00:19:59   II need something Harold think that's [TS]

00:20:00   right and every house in the United [TS]

00:20:02   Kingdom has a name even if it's like a [TS]

00:20:03   1-bedroom apartment it's called like the [TS]

00:20:05   Finns smoking Tain's of Glenwood on push [TS]

00:20:10   a door but so after a while I started to [TS]

00:20:12   you know imagine myself living in this [TS]

00:20:14   castle you know I have a very small [TS]

00:20:15   family have one child I have a mother a [TS]

00:20:19   sister and that my child has a mother [TS]

00:20:24   and then some we are at this point [TS]

00:20:31   talking just about sentient beings and [TS]

00:20:33   not belongings right I do that's right I [TS]

00:20:35   do a lot of belonging yeah the castle [TS]

00:20:40   the castle but I bet when you got that [TS]

00:20:42   bar you sent yourself out never filled I [TS]

00:20:45   mean I would definitely have a Hall of [TS]

00:20:47   mismatched swords [TS]

00:20:50   welcome to Sword Hall but where the [TS]

00:20:53   private features of Castro that might be [TS]

00:20:56   what I call the house sword ha ha ha I [TS]

00:21:00   like that fun Lord sword it's a man in [TS]

00:21:04   the bathrobe rampant on a castle this [TS]

00:21:07   episode of Roderick on the line is [TS]

00:21:09   brought to you in part by Squarespace [TS]

00:21:11   you can learn more about Squarespace [TS]

00:21:12   right now by going to squarespace.com [TS]

00:21:14   I'm a huge fan of Squarespace as a [TS]

00:21:16   listener of this show you are using [TS]

00:21:17   score space right now because that is [TS]

00:21:19   where we host the Roderick on the line [TS]

00:21:21   podcast thank you to Squarespace it's [TS]

00:21:23   not just for podcasts there are so many [TS]

00:21:25   things you can do with Squarespace you [TS]

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00:21:33   content you can even sell products and [TS]

00:21:35   services of all kinds you can promote [TS]

00:21:37   your physical or online business you can [TS]

00:21:39   announce an upcoming event or projects [TS]

00:21:41   so much more it's all part of [TS]

00:21:43   Squarespace Squarespace that's all this [TS]

00:21:45   by giving you beautiful templates [TS]

00:21:47   created by world-class designers they [TS]

00:21:49   have powerful ecommerce functionality [TS]

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00:21:54   of your site the settings the products [TS]

00:21:56   and more all of that with just a few [TS]

00:21:57   clicks everything is lost optimized for [TS]

00:21:59   mobile right out of the box they have a [TS]

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00:22:15   that 24x7 award-winning customer support [TS]

00:22:19   we're encouraging folks to make it you [TS]

00:22:21   make it yourself you can easily stand [TS]

00:22:22   out with creating a beautiful website [TS]

00:22:24   all by yourself it's beautiful you make [TS]

00:22:26   it yourself it's all in there you don't [TS]

00:22:27   need another person you can just do it [TS]

00:22:29   all take it dream it make it with [TS]

00:22:31   Squarespace so please right now go to [TS]

00:22:33   Squarespace comm for a free trial and [TS]

00:22:35   when you're ready to launch use the [TS]

00:22:37   offer code supertrain to save 10% off [TS]

00:22:39   your first purchase of a website or [TS]

00:22:41   domain our thanks to Squarespace for [TS]

00:22:44   supporting Roderick on the line and all [TS]

00:22:46   the great shows but but like I started [TS]

00:22:49   to realize like Who am I going to talk [TS]

00:22:51   to like getting the castle I didn't have [TS]

00:22:53   instantly like more friends yeah I [TS]

00:22:55   didn't have any vassals it's not like [TS]

00:22:57   gonna pick up in [TS]

00:22:59   College you get a pickup truck in [TS]

00:23:00   college everybody's your friend that's [TS]

00:23:01   right good Castle in Scotland there's a [TS]

00:23:04   load and I started to picture myself [TS]

00:23:05   going down to the local pub and then I'm [TS]

00:23:07   the American who calls himself Lord [TS]

00:23:08   sword that comes down to the pub [TS]

00:23:10   sometimes and wants to play darts like [TS]

00:23:12   not oh here comes Lord sword so this is [TS]

00:23:15   what you look at me I've got a new [TS]

00:23:17   portcullis [TS]

00:23:18   you have to think about my moat don't [TS]

00:23:20   stink the post-apocalypse like who what [TS]

00:23:24   are you gonna who'd gonna hang out with [TS]

00:23:25   so much me but also so much maintenance [TS]

00:23:27   yeah you're right you're right who would [TS]

00:23:28   you hang out with would it be other [TS]

00:23:29   castle dwellers but we're talking about [TS]

00:23:32   here in San Francisco you're talking to [TS]

00:23:34   living in the sunset live in sunset [TS]

00:23:35   every 8th house is occupied yeah the [TS]

00:23:38   rest are just full of bodies that died [TS]

00:23:40   in the flue yeah and you guys are here [TS]

00:23:42   you got your bucket they got their [TS]

00:23:44   bucket here every once in a while [TS]

00:23:45   sheriff buck if you should trade fuck [TS]

00:23:48   you let's get that work you look it you [TS]

00:23:52   wash my bucket I'll wash yours [TS]

00:23:55   fudge-like is the sunset see the problem [TS]

00:23:58   is that you know infrastructural there's [TS]

00:23:59   all kinds of things I mean it's gonna be [TS]

00:24:01   difficult you know gosh what if the word [TS]

00:24:03   up the reservoir gets a crack and all [TS]

00:24:05   the water comes down the main problem in [TS]

00:24:06   my neighborhood is if next door goes out [TS]

00:24:08   nobody is gonna have any idea what [TS]

00:24:10   there's one guy in my neighborhood in [TS]

00:24:12   particular I cannot imagine this guy [TS]

00:24:15   surviving he's so upset about people who [TS]

00:24:17   look like they might be stealing his [TS]

00:24:18   packages I don't think he even has a [TS]

00:24:20   bucket ready let me ask you as someone [TS]

00:24:23   who gets a lot of packages do you think [TS]

00:24:25   that packages routinely get stolen from [TS]

00:24:28   people's front porches I mean I think it [TS]

00:24:30   does definitely happen but it's one of [TS]

00:24:34   those things where you can well [TS]

00:24:36   obviously it's like any of these things [TS]

00:24:37   where you know what is it or well say [TS]

00:24:41   like if you get these people freaked out [TS]

00:24:43   enough you don't need your packages [TS]

00:24:44   stolen you mentally stealing your own [TS]

00:24:46   packages all the time you just you just [TS]

00:24:48   err you're so intense it's like that [TS]

00:24:50   person that person was near my bush for [TS]

00:24:52   too long I don't like the look of that [TS]

00:24:53   person who wears who wears something [TS]

00:24:55   with a hood in this kind of weather it [TS]

00:24:57   would seem to me that most package [TS]

00:24:59   thieves would end up with like seven [TS]

00:25:02   hundred bottles of contact lens solution [TS]

00:25:04   yeah for every one interesting thing [TS]

00:25:07   it's kind of a contact lens solution [TS]

00:25:09   diapers and porn I mean people get porn [TS]

00:25:12   male I'm a pigeon not not everybody has [TS]

00:25:17   a computer set not everything's like [TS]

00:25:19   you've never that you can send to the [TS]

00:25:20   store [TS]

00:25:21   it gets Bitcoin mining from the look of [TS]

00:25:23   goodwill some people got to do it on [TS]

00:25:25   their own they gotta watch it on the VCR [TS]

00:25:26   I'm you know I'm Amazon Prime it never [TS]

00:25:28   occurred to me at your recommendation [TS]

00:25:30   yes on prime never occurred to me to put [TS]

00:25:32   porn in there and see what happened can [TS]

00:25:35   you get porn on Amazon you might want to [TS]

00:25:37   look at the Kindle Store but that's like [TS]

00:25:40   porn where Fabio like takes you in his [TS]

00:25:42   arm wish do you want to know there's [TS]

00:25:47   like but but Kindle only has black and [TS]

00:25:49   white letters yeah but it's about having [TS]

00:25:51   sex with a billionaire dinosaur kid you [TS]

00:25:56   know what don't get out your phones [TS]

00:25:57   because I want you to pay attention to [TS]

00:25:58   what John has to share with you at your [TS]

00:26:00   earliest convenience please go into [TS]

00:26:01   Amazon and search for things like [TS]

00:26:03   billionaire and dime it's cuz that [TS]

00:26:07   dinosaur is gonna teach you a fuckin [TS]

00:26:09   lesson about how to reimburse your [TS]

00:26:11   disbursements is it is it fanfic is that [TS]

00:26:15   what it is [TS]

00:26:16   no it's professionally written shitty [TS]

00:26:18   writing that you can get deployed via [TS]

00:26:21   the Wi-Fi and it's about you know [TS]

00:26:23   fucking dinosaurs and billionaires [TS]

00:26:25   because the all kinds of different [TS]

00:26:26   combinations you just have something to [TS]

00:26:29   do with like tentacle porn ah except is [TS]

00:26:32   like small arm tiny big thighs small [TS]

00:26:38   small forearms you go the brothers can't [TS]

00:26:41   deny so do you feel like you're pretty [TS]

00:26:51   preps I mean if you if you uh you've got [TS]

00:26:54   a castle of your own right now you have [TS]

00:26:55   a perimeter that is very very well [TS]

00:26:57   regulated what are you doing here [TS]

00:26:59   militia yep I have an escape an escape [TS]

00:27:02   vehicle right a anti apocalypse motor [TS]

00:27:07   van your GMC RV I have a I have a barn [TS]

00:27:14   that is defendable I have a I have an [TS]

00:27:17   empty swimming pool full of logs [TS]

00:27:20   I have is that the same no wait no hey [TS]

00:27:24   gay is when you get lines on your jeans [TS]

00:27:26   yeah what's the thing that's about [TS]

00:27:27   coziness in Finland is that logs in a [TS]

00:27:29   pool what's that called logs in a pool I [TS]

00:27:31   think that's a different thing I don't [TS]

00:27:33   think that's Jim Baker's bucket by any [TS]

00:27:35   other name if you have too much of the [TS]

00:27:39   pepper food you may discover that when [TS]

00:27:41   you attempt to defecate you find nothing [TS]

00:27:44   but logs in the pool I don't know about [TS]

00:27:47   finish come frogs about the coziness do [TS]

00:27:51   you guys know you guys are he gay is it [TS]

00:27:54   Hagee who girl the penis whiskers yeah [TS]

00:28:01   then hygge is this the finned is the fin [TS]

00:28:03   link Oh someone's got a leak Wow um is [TS]

00:28:08   the feeling coziness for uh because and [TS]

00:28:10   the thing is that many I'm sure many a [TS]

00:28:12   lot of hisses for this but yeah I have [TS]

00:28:13   I've been spending more time on 4chan [TS]

00:28:15   again buddy and they have they're one of [TS]

00:28:19   the threads that's interesting [TS]

00:28:21   georgeanna is the comfy the comfy thread [TS]

00:28:24   where they just post pictures of things [TS]

00:28:26   that are comfy and a lot of them are [TS]

00:28:29   like little Finnish houses with snow [TS]

00:28:33   coming down and little there's little [TS]

00:28:35   that there bishop thomas kane yeah and [TS]

00:28:44   then the next thread is about people [TS]

00:28:45   being beheaded in car accidents but the [TS]

00:28:48   cozy threads are really nice but no i [TS]

00:28:53   feel like if you think about being ready [TS]

00:28:56   for for the disaster is not about being [TS]

00:28:58   ready to defend your perimeter because i [TS]

00:29:00   think it's very true that by the time [TS]

00:29:03   you are defending your perimeter you [TS]

00:29:06   will be defending it against people who [TS]

00:29:08   are better armed and more motivated it's [TS]

00:29:10   too late yeah okay there's not you're [TS]

00:29:13   not defending it against random zombies [TS]

00:29:15   it's gonna be against people who are [TS]

00:29:17   driving around in a toyota pickup with a [TS]

00:29:19   50 caliber machine gun in the back who [TS]

00:29:21   are like we're taking over right and so [TS]

00:29:24   don't worry about like guns and fighting [TS]

00:29:26   just worry about like it's it's the [TS]

00:29:28   bridge right it's not a three-day bridge [TS]

00:29:30   it's a 30-day bridge okay [TS]

00:29:31   can you keep your families [TS]

00:29:33   and keep yourselves like heated and [TS]

00:29:35   washed during the time that it takes to [TS]

00:29:37   reestablish a grid and because what's [TS]

00:29:41   gonna happen is the first thing that [TS]

00:29:42   happens is that the the supermarkets [TS]

00:29:44   aren't stopped anymore because the first [TS]

00:29:47   thing is gonna happen as you can't call [TS]

00:29:48   a kid to go pick it up in the [TS]

00:29:49   supermarket for you well right you know [TS]

00:29:51   what I think yeah you can't Yelp to [TS]

00:29:53   decide which restaurant has the best [TS]

00:29:55   meatballs that's the first thing to go [TS]

00:29:57   ruin my engagement party one star but [TS]

00:29:59   we're but we're talking about like the [TS]

00:30:01   devasting about the 9.9 we're talking [TS]

00:30:03   about the one with it with the [TS]

00:30:04   accompanying singer and then all of and [TS]

00:30:07   then the big fluke um I think it's opens [TS]

00:30:11   at once is the thing [TS]

00:30:12   World War one happened and then the big [TS]

00:30:15   flew and then the and then not very long [TS]

00:30:17   ten years the stock market crash hit the [TS]

00:30:20   flap and then right then right after [TS]

00:30:21   that there was a depression yes then [TS]

00:30:23   there was another world war in [TS]

00:30:25   coincidence right and then there's you [TS]

00:30:27   got wing walkers yeah ticker tape that's [TS]

00:30:30   right Barnstormers straw boaters and [TS]

00:30:32   then and then modern jazz no new it was [TS]

00:30:37   it was the Bitcoin but not the Bitcoin [TS]

00:30:39   the cryptocurrency of its time let me [TS]

00:30:41   ask you you've mentioned Bitcoin several [TS]

00:30:43   times yes your you ever some real talk [TS]

00:30:51   what is this we're looking at I saw [TS]

00:30:58   these but I didn't want to look at them [TS]

00:31:04   because it if it's what I think it is [TS]

00:31:07   I'm pretty fucking happy we should know [TS]

00:31:11   what turn away anyway are those should [TS]

00:31:16   they be upside down if they're from [TS]

00:31:17   Australia though are those phony or war [TS]

00:31:19   I think might be phony Awards they [TS]

00:31:21   really look like funny we did not bring [TS]

00:31:22   these awards ourselves let's check it [TS]

00:31:25   out see what it says let's say anything [TS]

00:31:27   oh it's a phony award it's a phony war [TS]

00:31:46   awarded to Roderick on the line for most [TS]

00:31:49   podcast podcast I promised myself I [TS]

00:31:53   wouldn't cry thank you I just want to [TS]

00:31:58   say I just wanna say thanks to thanks to [TS]

00:32:00   everybody this is a very important time [TS]

00:32:01   and moving them right now and I'm very [TS]

00:32:02   I'm very excited to have the opportunity [TS]

00:32:04   to be up in front of you don't play me [TS]

00:32:05   off thank you thank you I'd like to [TS]

00:32:08   thank my wife I'd like to let my other [TS]

00:32:10   wife [TS]

00:32:13   I really spared no expense here with [TS]

00:32:15   this dowel is some expenses but but the [TS]

00:32:19   I think the paint might still well it's [TS]

00:32:24   an interesting color of gold it's really [TS]

00:32:26   gold mixed with chocolate it's one thing [TS]

00:32:28   to never win an award that hasn't been [TS]

00:32:31   invented yet and it's another thing to [TS]

00:32:34   win award for a thing that was just made [TS]

00:32:37   up that doesn't exist and for everybody [TS]

00:32:40   out there who's ever won of something [TS]

00:32:42   that didn't exist and didn't understand [TS]

00:32:45   why they didn't have it I just want to [TS]

00:32:47   say me too [TS]

00:32:50   thank you yeah [TS]

00:32:54   mucuna tatata thank you shatru de patata [TS]

00:33:00   survival bucket 1-800 that's right no [TS]

00:33:05   Vic tuna frittata Nelly Furtado let me [TS]

00:33:10   ask you though about Bitcoin it seems [TS]

00:33:12   like the type of thing that people would [TS]

00:33:15   did we start I have noise you feel like [TS]

00:33:17   me doing this for 30 minutes this time [TS]

00:33:18   is it now got another goddamn hour to do [TS]

00:33:20   here well holy shit we'll throw 2 [TS]

00:33:24   questions after a while and they'll [TS]

00:33:26   entertain themselves it seems to me [TS]

00:33:30   there was a moment right where all of us [TS]

00:33:32   wanted to maybe thought about getting a [TS]

00:33:34   Bitcoin but then when we looked at how [TS]

00:33:36   much they cost [TS]

00:33:37   they were like $40 and it seemed too [TS]

00:33:39   expensive but you seem like someone who [TS]

00:33:42   might have gotten a Bitcoin did you get [TS]

00:33:45   a Bitcoin there's a lot of things that I [TS]

00:33:48   don't understand I've made a study of [TS]

00:33:51   not understanding things and I feel like [TS]

00:33:53   that's something I've gotten kind of [TS]

00:33:54   good at it's very very difficult for me [TS]

00:33:56   to understand from what I can gather [TS]

00:33:58   it's like money but not and you need a [TS]

00:34:01   computer to make it even though you're [TS]

00:34:03   not really making it but the [TS]

00:34:05   distribution of what you've made [TS]

00:34:07   involves math and lots of people in [TS]

00:34:09   power and then eventually you can't sell [TS]

00:34:12   it because the fee is too high and [TS]

00:34:13   there's too many people trying to do it [TS]

00:34:15   at the same time their views [TS]

00:34:16   I think there's oh that's how they get [TS]

00:34:18   that's how they get you yeah it's a [TS]

00:34:20   crypto eel so it's it's like the money [TS]

00:34:24   gets what would you call it distributed [TS]

00:34:31   the Kazakh Stan Igor 1 million dollar 1 [TS]

00:34:35   million dollar fee goes to Kazakh Stan [TS]

00:34:36   are you wearing this no no tell me more [TS]

00:34:38   he went to Cossacks they know this is [TS]

00:34:40   the kind of thing this those fat cats [TS]

00:34:41   don't want you to know you got a 1 [TS]

00:34:43   million dollar fee in Kazakhstan got it [TS]

00:34:45   got out that million dollar 3 million [TS]

00:34:46   dollar fee in Kazakhstan it's not what [TS]

00:34:49   they call a fiat currency that's the [TS]

00:34:50   term people like you throw what they're [TS]

00:34:52   saying real money that's called a fiat [TS]

00:34:54   currency it's like a made-up phony [TS]

00:34:56   baloney [TS]

00:34:56   I think that's based on nothing unlike a [TS]

00:34:58   made-up phony the loan anything that [TS]

00:35:00   requires computers in that it's like a [TS]

00:35:01   fix it again Tony [TS]

00:35:04   no there's like two Fiat owners in our [TS]

00:35:07   repair they both live in New Jersey and [TS]

00:35:10   they're not here to laugh is it one for [TS]

00:35:11   dodge dodge I did fix it again Tony a [TS]

00:35:14   fixed or repaired daily which is [TS]

00:35:16   somebody should have workshop that a [TS]

00:35:17   little longer is there one for dodge [TS]

00:35:19   don't obviously dodge great energy it's [TS]

00:35:22   a backronym it's a person is okay what's [TS]

00:35:27   your Lamborghini lastly and more [TS]

00:35:33   ordinarily though lastly and more [TS]

00:35:37   basically oh really [TS]

00:35:45   gosh how how is nothing in nothing gosh [TS]

00:35:57   bikini got a Lambo Lambo 47 Lambos when [TS]

00:36:07   you were a teenager do you have a [TS]

00:36:08   supercar that you cared about you don't [TS]

00:36:10   yes cars now but we're myself what was [TS]

00:36:12   your supercar your teenage supercar [TS]

00:36:14   ah-64 TF Mustang over the first one X [TS]

00:36:17   count grown with the like some kind of [TS]

00:36:20   special thing or just terrier stock one [TS]

00:36:22   brownie interior pony interior how does [TS]

00:36:24   Merlyn know these things I thought that [TS]

00:36:26   he hated cars I wanted one so I want a [TS]

00:36:30   blue one with the hexagons and what was [TS]

00:36:32   it my dreams in my dreams your dreams [TS]

00:36:35   let me coop dude oh yeah Tudor yeah yeah [TS]

00:36:38   yeah I like lots of cars but at the time [TS]

00:36:41   that I had these desires that I couldn't [TS]

00:36:43   fulfill because money he had the [TS]

00:36:44   Maverick are the it was called the [TS]

00:36:45   Mustang - at the time oh it's the [TS]

00:36:47   long-standing fixed or repaired daily [TS]

00:36:50   Mustang which which kind of looked like [TS]

00:36:52   if somebody put tires on an 8-track the [TS]

00:36:54   Mustang 2 was a was a Pinto that had a [TS]

00:36:57   horse and a Pinto is a horse [TS]

00:37:00   hi meal involvement not troubling overly [TS]

00:37:06   am i right Ralph Nader john-john [TS]

00:37:14   Roderick what was I feel like I should [TS]

00:37:16   know this what was your teenage boy [TS]

00:37:18   dream car I did not go in for all the [TS]

00:37:21   the puffed up battalion sports things I [TS]

00:37:25   wanted a like the first year 1966 [TS]

00:37:30   Porsche 911 but it turns out I would [TS]

00:37:34   barely fit in one you'd have to take the [TS]

00:37:38   seed out begin and I could sit in the [TS]

00:37:40   back I have to take up the wheel and [TS]

00:37:43   manually manipulate the steering oh and [TS]

00:37:46   there might be someone in here that has [TS]

00:37:47   a Porsche who wants to argue with me [TS]

00:37:49   about whether or not I would fit in it [TS]

00:37:51   and I don't want to do that that's a [TS]

00:37:53   complete exaggeration you've fitted a [TS]

00:37:55   really good but I but there's part of me [TS]

00:37:58   that's still once one but yeah but all [TS]

00:38:01   those things have become all the things [TS]

00:38:03   that I loved that were four assholes [TS]

00:38:05   then are four bigger asshole Wow because [TS]

00:38:08   now they can get it yes like me I want [TS]

00:38:10   this big gym tomorrow like get it bring [TS]

00:38:13   it to me back then if you saved your [TS]

00:38:16   money it was conceivable that you could [TS]

00:38:18   get an old cool car but it's been [TS]

00:38:21   forever fixed like an mg you get [TS]

00:38:23   something or you get like a sprite you [TS]

00:38:25   could fix something I had a friend an [TS]

00:38:26   austin-healey sprite and was constantly [TS]

00:38:28   like fixing it up but like you know now [TS]

00:38:29   today you can get a fucking banana seat [TS]

00:38:31   bike on Amazon Prime my fingertips [TS]

00:38:35   assholes [TS]

00:38:37   I've been looks ever since my truck [TS]

00:38:38   caught on fire yeah which wasn't that [TS]

00:38:41   long ago [TS]

00:38:43   I fixed the truck I took it to my guy he [TS]

00:38:46   said he said it was gonna be expensive [TS]

00:38:48   to fix and I said I'm pot committed to [TS]

00:38:51   this thing it's whatever the cost [TS]

00:38:54   and so one just a bigger audience up to [TS]

00:38:57   date enough people are up to date on the [TS]

00:38:58   show you had you had your truck there [TS]

00:39:00   was a slight incendiary incident [TS]

00:39:03   something happened something happens you [TS]

00:39:05   know 99% of the time when an alternator [TS]

00:39:07   fails it fails to continue to charge it [TS]

00:39:11   stops alternating yeah one one in a [TS]

00:39:13   hundred times what happens is the [TS]

00:39:15   alternator just gets out of the way of [TS]

00:39:18   the electricity [TS]

00:39:18   oh it just says I'm Audi it's like see [TS]

00:39:21   you later and so 18 volts of pure [TS]

00:39:24   electricity goes right into everything [TS]

00:39:26   yeah and it caught it on fire and I put [TS]

00:39:28   it out with a with an old-fashioned fire [TS]

00:39:30   extinguisher that just shoots pure hate [TS]

00:39:33   at everything and as you know hate [TS]

00:39:36   extinguishes fire yes and paper jams oh [TS]

00:39:41   and so but now the windshield wipers are [TS]

00:39:44   always on living perfect with the song [TS]

00:39:48   in the radio the the the debt the the [TS]

00:39:52   instruments in the dash are one-by-one [TS]

00:39:54   blinking out the speedometer no longer [TS]

00:39:56   works well because all the all the mica [TS]

00:40:00   from the hate extinguisher went into [TS]

00:40:02   everything in a while so change that the [TS]

00:40:04   way they make extinguisher now you don't [TS]

00:40:05   get as much hate well now it's just it's [TS]

00:40:07   just a carbon dioxide it just it just it [TS]

00:40:10   just blankets it with rationality and [TS]

00:40:11   talks to fire out of it yeah yeah [TS]

00:40:12   alright bores the shit out of the phone [TS]

00:40:14   by your logic fire should be everywhere [TS]

00:40:20   the new logic patents a fire [TS]

00:40:24   extinguisher but I started looking for a [TS]

00:40:26   car because I felt like you know I owe [TS]

00:40:28   it to everyone to have a car that has [TS]

00:40:30   electricity clutches for you it's it's [TS]

00:40:33   for the well it's for you and it's for [TS]

00:40:35   my kid who every time she gets into the [TS]

00:40:36   car she's like why does your car smell [TS]

00:40:38   like the inside of a tank legacy and I [TS]

00:40:42   don't know how she learned how a tank [TS]

00:40:43   smells but I think it's you know kids [TS]

00:40:45   are reading weird books now at a young [TS]

00:40:47   age yeah I think yeah she was reading [TS]

00:40:49   and she was reading like she she gets [TS]

00:40:51   that out to visa how this tank smell she [TS]

00:40:54   and her friends were watching fury right [TS]

00:40:59   the recent Brad Pitt movie about tank [TS]

00:41:01   combat oh no one sight to see that bunch [TS]

00:41:06   of peaceniks in here [TS]

00:41:08   um problem man anyway so I so so she's [TS]

00:41:14   like why don't why do you why don't you [TS]

00:41:16   why this is why this is the thing we [TS]

00:41:18   have to be in for being on roads smell [TS]

00:41:20   like this yeah one why do these missions [TS]

00:41:21   though the smell was not detailed out to [TS]

00:41:24   your satisfaction even on repeat detail [TS]

00:41:26   yeah it's not that smell it's just it [TS]

00:41:28   was the normal smell of the vehicle that [TS]

00:41:30   smelled like naugahyde covered with [TS]

00:41:31   motor oil yeah which essentially that's [TS]

00:41:34   the smell of love that's the finish on [TS]

00:41:35   these boots that did you guys notice [TS]

00:41:37   that we're wearing the same boots we can [TS]

00:41:40   we access this out ahead of time [TS]

00:41:41   completely accidental when you are a man [TS]

00:41:44   of a certain age and you wear Doc [TS]

00:41:46   Martens it communicates that you are not [TS]

00:41:48   getting old gracefully [TS]

00:41:49   no forget you in future you know I love [TS]

00:41:53   the poor sizing of Doc Martens but it [TS]

00:41:55   like the convenience of a slip-on shoe [TS]

00:41:57   hi I feel like I get a little bit of a [TS]

00:42:00   fussy thing going I feel like I should [TS]

00:42:01   get a nice tight cuff little tight oh [TS]

00:42:04   good we're doing the pants material it's [TS]

00:42:08   like things in a trench coat it's never [TS]

00:42:11   not funny but so I wanna I want a car [TS]

00:42:14   and I want to get a good car but a [TS]

00:42:15   legacy I want a stylish car I don't want [TS]

00:42:17   to drive around in a fuckin old shitty [TS]

00:42:19   car like a Tercel or one of these new [TS]

00:42:21   cars people are like why don't you get [TS]

00:42:22   one of these cars that looks like a [TS]

00:42:23   Tonka truck and I'm like because I'm not [TS]

00:42:25   a fucking Fisher Price person you want [TS]

00:42:27   Honda cute boys you don't wanna hide a [TS]

00:42:28   cute boy don't get anything the texture [TS]

00:42:32   something with nuance like a brand [TS]

00:42:33   koozie something curvy and beautiful [TS]

00:42:35   that can easily catch on fire and then [TS]

00:42:36   put some face it's beautiful it's a [TS]

00:42:38   legacy somebody would communicate [TS]

00:42:39   something about me to the other drivers [TS]

00:42:42   namely get out of my way and this guy [TS]

00:42:46   looks like trouble [TS]

00:42:49   one of the great things about the truck [TS]

00:42:51   is not that people see you in the [TS]

00:42:53   rearview mirror and get out of your way [TS]

00:42:54   it's that people who are behind you that [TS]

00:42:56   want you to get out of their way [TS]

00:42:58   realize that they'd better leave you [TS]

00:42:59   alone oh boy yeah because it's like I [TS]

00:43:02   don't want to honk at this thing yeah [TS]

00:43:04   who knows what's who knows what's [TS]

00:43:05   driving that it's good I just on the [TS]

00:43:07   back bumper I have an NRA sticker and a [TS]

00:43:09   van Halen sticker this is like don't you [TS]

00:43:13   know don't you don't know which way to [TS]

00:43:14   go around this car new the new this is [TS]

00:43:20   kind of a Mimi thing of like you put one [TS]

00:43:21   sticker over the other like you know you [TS]

00:43:23   put your I kind of look like the same [TS]

00:43:25   van Halen sticker over in NR East [TS]

00:43:30   yeah you ever get people step to you [TS]

00:43:32   within your vehicle I want to get back [TS]

00:43:34   to your story but do you have do you [TS]

00:43:35   ever have to deal with people it's sort [TS]

00:43:36   of like you were like you never noticed [TS]

00:43:38   like on Muni and Bart you never see two [TS]

00:43:42   local denizens like fighting each other [TS]

00:43:44   they're all like a local denizen is [TS]

00:43:46   usually like hassling a normal like a [TS]

00:43:48   lady with a baby like I live in the [TS]

00:43:50   walls I'm wallpaper man and please just [TS]

00:43:53   let me have a life but like you never [TS]

00:43:54   see to people like go have each other I [TS]

00:43:56   kind of shave each other explain [TS]

00:43:58   football you know you never see that [TS]

00:44:00   kind of like I don't know what's going [TS]

00:44:01   on Aires made of gravy it's always there [TS]

00:44:04   always going after a normal do you ever [TS]

00:44:06   have to go up against another crazy [TS]

00:44:09   vehicle person for predominance the and [TS]

00:44:12   also the area's made of gravy for sure I [TS]

00:44:17   don't need a pass it's in my mind the [TS]

00:44:22   thing about a 1979 GMC Suburban is that [TS]

00:44:25   you are 100% invisible to 98% of the [TS]

00:44:28   people in the world they just don't see [TS]

00:44:29   it because it looks like it it looks [TS]

00:44:31   like being a 51 year old man well or [TS]

00:44:33   just it looks like oh I don't know a [TS]

00:44:34   truck that doesn't belong and so their [TS]

00:44:36   eyes just don't see it but razzle dazzle [TS]

00:44:40   in a way it's kind that's right yeah but [TS]

00:44:42   every seven days a 62 year old black man [TS]

00:44:46   will tip his hat as [TS]

00:44:47   bye and I'll be like the back at you sir [TS]

00:44:51   so there there's just a very small [TS]

00:44:54   demographic of people that are like nice [TS]

00:44:57   truck and I feel a real commune of a [TS]

00:45:00   fraternal community with them but I [TS]

00:45:02   never it's not like I ever pull over and [TS]

00:45:04   get out and say like I want to hang and [TS]

00:45:07   they don't run after a part of the code [TS]

00:45:09   right no it wouldn't I mean you just you [TS]

00:45:12   wouldn't always just say like after the [TS]

00:45:13   apocalypse you wouldn't you just say if [TS]

00:45:15   you want to get up in my castle no no I [TS]

00:45:16   think what you do is you want to share a [TS]

00:45:18   bucket reach down between your seat and [TS]

00:45:20   you pick up your fire extinguisher and [TS]

00:45:21   wave it back at [TS]

00:45:29   but so I wanna I want a car and I [TS]

00:45:31   decided that what I need to get is some [TS]

00:45:33   kind of you know I'm gonna get a Fernan [TS]

00:45:35   job because I'm not gonna get one of [TS]

00:45:36   these these these human look at Chrysler [TS]

00:45:39   like candidly his real youth simply [TS]

00:45:46   leaves every every reach-around stolen [TS]

00:45:53   Chrysler's I feel like I feel like the [TS]

00:45:56   truck industry right they've like pumped [TS]

00:45:59   everything's so pumped up everything's [TS]

00:46:00   got so many bulbous like fake muscles on [TS]

00:46:03   it but necessary diesel you got fenders [TS]

00:46:06   you got the extra wheels in the back [TS]

00:46:08   like you know what are you gonna do you [TS]

00:46:10   gonna put extra Bush light back there [TS]

00:46:11   like what come on stuff up front to like [TS]

00:46:14   the grills just look like it's just [TS]

00:46:16   looks like a face on top of a face and [TS]

00:46:18   so I decided oh I'm gonna get one of [TS]

00:46:20   these mercedes-benz mercedes-benz [TS]

00:46:22   because that says a different thing [TS]

00:46:25   about a man different thing but then you [TS]

00:46:27   look at them and there are two things [TS]

00:46:29   about them they're not cheap even when [TS]

00:46:30   they're used and also you know that [TS]

00:46:32   every quart of oil you buy has to be [TS]

00:46:34   Mercedes oil and it's 40 dollars before [TS]

00:46:37   say so but you're talking like an out of [TS]

00:46:39   warranty old ass not like you've got to [TS]

00:46:41   take it to the dealer kind of something [TS]

00:46:43   that has electricity but but like [TS]

00:46:44   alright but you know like something cool [TS]

00:46:46   anyway that's where I'm at right now but [TS]

00:46:48   I was I was hoping that this year was [TS]

00:46:50   gonna be like it one of these years [TS]

00:46:52   where I just made a bunch of money [TS]

00:46:53   everything happened and I said something [TS]

00:46:56   a person yeah and I'd settle free either [TS]

00:46:59   if I could buy like a car from 2012 I [TS]

00:47:02   would feel like I was really everything [TS]

00:47:04   was happening [TS]

00:47:04   singing sister and then I realized it [TS]

00:47:06   was it was still me that was gonna be [TS]

00:47:09   doing things and so whatever those [TS]

00:47:12   dreams of everything working out were [TS]

00:47:14   still they still had one problem [TS]

00:47:16   you you are not an option yeah right act [TS]

00:47:20   like you're your standard on every video [TS]

00:47:21   I was still gonna make I was still gonna [TS]

00:47:23   make every decision I would normally [TS]

00:47:25   make 18 oh man we don't get to fool [TS]

00:47:28   ourselves anymore it's fucking bullshit [TS]

00:47:30   it's brutal yeah so you got castles you [TS]

00:47:35   got cars you got buckets I don't know [TS]

00:47:40   two people who've never listened to the [TS]

00:47:43   show this happens on the recordings oh [TS]

00:47:45   yeah [TS]

00:47:46   just did I do so much editing on the [TS]

00:47:48   show you never notice he does do a lot [TS]

00:47:50   of it oh you've got a this yeah the one [TS]

00:47:53   thing that I can't that I can't do on [TS]

00:47:55   the show let my Jesse thorn pocket [TS]

00:47:57   square yes no one just thorn you I can't [TS]

00:48:00   notice things about you on the show and [TS]

00:48:02   I'm noticing that you have a like am [TS]

00:48:04   watch mode Aaron like everything else [TS]

00:48:06   about you could have just fallen out of [TS]

00:48:09   out of somebody's like falling out of [TS]

00:48:12   like unsuccessful gay porn from the [TS]

00:48:15   early age or like the the the page of [TS]

00:48:19   the Sears catalog for cool dads and then [TS]

00:48:21   from like 80 from 1980 but they're [TS]

00:48:25   looking at this watch that's just like [TS]

00:48:26   it's like r2d2 yeah yeah not not as [TS]

00:48:31   funny after you you have it for a while [TS]

00:48:36   everybody cares nothing important to do [TS]

00:48:44   is it it is it mining bit crown you need [TS]

00:48:48   more focus in your life I don't know I [TS]

00:48:56   have a lot of problems [TS]

00:49:00   this is funny to you how Jesus Christ is [TS]

00:49:05   it Syrian you talk to it can you say so [TS]

00:49:07   you say watch me watch me this is great [TS]

00:49:13   it looks good let's do it let's hear it [TS]

00:49:15   what time is it what did it say who is [TS]

00:49:28   John roderick john roderick would you [TS]

00:49:49   like to ask john roderick would you like [TS]

00:49:53   to split a bucket [TS]

00:50:08   nothing yet [TS]

00:50:10   I think it's still mining Bitcoin there [TS]

00:50:15   is a text here from a friend that says [TS]

00:50:16   there are a couple of total john [TS]

00:50:18   roderick dream girls in my Zumba class [TS]

00:50:22   no photo short curly hair nose mossad [TS]

00:50:28   combat boots did you say nose mossad [TS]

00:50:40   vegetable cabrera is really martial art [TS]

00:50:49   my god this episode of roderick on the [TS]

00:50:56   line is brought to you in part by Casper [TS]

00:50:58   you can learn more about Casper right [TS]

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00:51:13   of your life doing anything you'd want [TS]

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00:51:16   possibly be and that's why you need [TS]

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00:52:02   door and if for any reason you don't [TS]

00:52:03   love it [TS]

00:52:04   Casper has a hassle-free return policy [TS]

00:52:06   we are a Casper family I know whereof I [TS]

00:52:09   speak [TS]

00:52:09   my wife and I sleep on a Casper my [TS]

00:52:11   daughter sleeps on a Casper we just love [TS]

00:52:13   them anytime I travel I'm so looking [TS]

00:52:14   forward to getting home [TS]

00:52:16   my Casper mattress so join me please [TS]

00:52:18   start sleeping ahead of the curve with [TS]

00:52:20   Casper you can get fifty dollars towards [TS]

00:52:23   select mattress purchases by visiting [TS]

00:52:25   Casper com slash super trade and using [TS]

00:52:27   the very special offer code supertrain [TS]

00:52:29   at checkout terms and conditions apply [TS]

00:52:32   our thanks to Casper for supporting [TS]

00:52:34   Roderick on the line and all the great [TS]

00:52:36   ships what you're unfolding this piece [TS]

00:52:39   papers this our contract does it say how [TS]

00:52:41   long we have to do this show forever ah [TS]

00:52:45   let's move on to the next portion of the [TS]

00:52:47   program which is some new bullshit we're [TS]

00:52:48   making up I went on the internet earlier [TS]

00:52:51   today and we should also warn people we [TS]

00:52:55   will probably take questions from the [TS]

00:52:56   audience after this hangout afterwards [TS]

00:52:58   do not hang out much because you're all [TS]

00:53:01   fucking gonna make me sick and I have to [TS]

00:53:02   go home I have a podcast record in the [TS]

00:53:04   morning and I still haven't taken my [TS]

00:53:05   sleeping pill yeah don't talk or breathe [TS]

00:53:07   on Merlin don't get close just way out [TS]

00:53:09   know your being here is plenty but you [TS]

00:53:14   can talk to me I'll stick around [TS]

00:53:15   yeah but we're also gonna take question [TS]

00:53:18   on my behalf I went on the internet this [TS]

00:53:20   afternoon and I said to us as people [TS]

00:53:22   that says I said Generation supertrain [TS]

00:53:24   is there a topic from Roderick on the [TS]

00:53:27   line for which you'd like to hear John [TS]

00:53:29   Roderick provide an update 98 percent of [TS]

00:53:33   them said GMC RV I bet Jim CRV is on the [TS]

00:53:35   list all right we have not prepared we [TS]

00:53:38   unless you've seen some of this listener [TS]

00:53:41   Sean in of Seattle [TS]

00:53:47   we're like safar he says his the thing [TS]

00:53:50   the thing about Jews listener Sean n [TS]

00:53:55   Sean in from Seattle asks what's the [TS]

00:53:58   thing about junina there's no what's [TS]

00:54:00   just the thing about Jews I think he [TS]

00:54:02   wants you to follow up on the thing [TS]

00:54:03   about Jesus what you want to do I think [TS]

00:54:04   another question cuz I do this did I do [TS]

00:54:06   something that I do bits on Jews that [TS]

00:54:08   doesn't seem like me you know I'm a [TS]

00:54:15   Judea file and that's a that's difficult [TS]

00:54:18   to say I don't think they like to be [TS]

00:54:20   filed [TS]

00:54:22   they enlists do not turn off soon [TS]

00:54:26   listener John not this John listener [TS]

00:54:28   John and many other people let's be [TS]

00:54:30   honest currents that if you want to say [TS]

00:54:31   in as much as you're comfortable and [TS]

00:54:33   legally obligated to say what is the [TS]

00:54:34   current status of the GMC RP the GMC RV [TS]

00:54:38   is under a tarp because out of respect [TS]

00:54:43   it's under a tarp because we're in the [TS]

00:54:46   rainy season in Seattle and it is easier [TS]

00:54:48   to de tarp if I it when I want when [TS]

00:54:51   there's a sunny day than it is to [TS]

00:54:54   dehumidifier it I like the way it smells [TS]

00:54:57   yeah well I know it smells great but [TS]

00:54:59   it's just like if it if it sits in the [TS]

00:55:01   rain for two-and-a-half miles then you [TS]

00:55:04   have that it's kind of like grandma's [TS]

00:55:05   old Underpants and look magazines you [TS]

00:55:08   know you want to flip through them but [TS]

00:55:09   not a lot I do not know no but mildew is [TS]

00:55:16   that ablest mildew it's it's it's got a [TS]

00:55:17   certain moist you're doing the [TS]

00:55:21   international symbol of I love this wine [TS]

00:55:23   oh it's guys there's so many things [TS]

00:55:26   going on its own there's a lot of [TS]

00:55:27   complexity in the mouthfeel I'm making [TS]

00:55:31   that effluvium thing you're never [TS]

00:55:32   supposed to just snort the chemicals [TS]

00:55:34   you're supposed to get in a flu VM right [TS]

00:55:35   right a flu viim yeah [TS]

00:55:38   RV is that a good RV a nice RV feels it [TS]

00:55:42   should smell like things are wet that [TS]

00:55:46   the exhaust is routed through the [TS]

00:55:48   dashboard [TS]

00:55:49   it should smell like someone's been [TS]

00:55:51   living there for a year with a cat like [TS]

00:55:55   it should smell like you've been frying [TS]

00:55:56   fish in there since the 70s like all [TS]

00:55:59   these things mix together to get this [TS]

00:56:01   like odor RV and you know mine has that [TS]

00:56:05   of course like it's like I have to do is [TS]

00:56:07   smell the curtains and you get the whole [TS]

00:56:08   experience but I just don't want their [TS]

00:56:11   tunes are very rustic yeah there's an [TS]

00:56:13   example this is original curtains and [TS]

00:56:15   the thing about the RV is it has [TS]

00:56:16   curtains and louvers so you can really [TS]

00:56:19   exclude the outside world but you know [TS]

00:56:22   the back window is this if it's like [TS]

00:56:24   scenic picture window you can back up on [TS]

00:56:26   you can go on the Pacific Coast Highway [TS]

00:56:27   back up to one of those cliffs and wake [TS]

00:56:30   up in the morning to the to the breakers [TS]

00:56:32   and the seagulls and the oil derricks [TS]

00:56:35   out there just leaking into the sea and [TS]

00:56:37   the smell that's curtains but uh but I [TS]

00:56:40   carped it it's in the backyard the [TS]

00:56:42   problem was I drove it around the block [TS]

00:56:45   in preparation to back it in because it [TS]

00:56:49   was parked like this and I needed to go [TS]

00:56:50   around the block in order to have the [TS]

00:56:51   right angle to back it into its spot in [TS]

00:56:54   front of the barn to be tarped also does [TS]

00:56:56   a kind of a good idea to get all the [TS]

00:56:57   things in motion one last time's right [TS]

00:56:59   so doesn't all just kind of freeze up in [TS]

00:57:00   the same place forever and 300 yards [TS]

00:57:02   from its from its eventual berth in [TS]

00:57:05   drydock everything shut down the power [TS]

00:57:08   went off the engine quit and I was like [TS]

00:57:11   I didn't have enough forward momentum to [TS]

00:57:13   just roll up to the house I was like I [TS]

00:57:17   was not even a block away and I had to [TS]

00:57:19   call triple-a who had to come they don't [TS]

00:57:23   like that they like being called in [TS]

00:57:25   their biggest wrecker and it's one of [TS]

00:57:27   those records that has that has more [TS]

00:57:29   more like rollers and flashing lights [TS]

00:57:32   and spotlights on the side than the than [TS]

00:57:35   the main shipping as you can't turn off [TS]

00:57:37   it just looks like the Close Encounters [TS]

00:57:38   ship as it turns upside down it's just [TS]

00:57:41   like lights everywhere and all that [TS]

00:57:43   neighbors came out to see what was going [TS]

00:57:45   on and that and the wrecker was blocking [TS]

00:57:47   the tow truck so the one neighbor that [TS]

00:57:49   really needs his mail was really upset [TS]

00:57:52   and I kept saying it the when the mail [TS]

00:57:55   truck gets here I'm gonna explain [TS]

00:57:56   to the mailman and he was pacing and [TS]

00:57:59   then so I had to I couldn't even monitor [TS]

00:58:01   the towing I know you didn't crowd [TS]

00:58:04   manage I had to be in the back like [TS]

00:58:06   everything's fine everyone it's cool [TS]

00:58:07   don't worry I'm looking for the postman [TS]

00:58:10   and then I saw the the the mailman [TS]

00:58:14   coming from a half a mile away and had [TS]

00:58:16   to watch as he stopped at each mailbox [TS]

00:58:19   which is what they do [TS]

00:58:20   yeah like this this slow motion [TS]

00:58:22   anticipation of this was their concern [TS]

00:58:25   that he would just go around it this guy [TS]

00:58:27   was pacing I'm not getting out of this [TS]

00:58:28   he didn't want to talk to the guy and so [TS]

00:58:30   it's just as like slow-mo thing of like [TS]

00:58:33   come on I just got a 30-second thing I [TS]

00:58:35   need to tell you about this guy's mail [TS]

00:58:37   and he's just like and he's taking his [TS]

00:58:39   time he's sorting through all the [TS]

00:58:41   circulars he's put in the safe way he [TS]

00:58:43   knows what he's doing neighbors upset [TS]

00:58:45   but he doesn't have to be the one to [TS]

00:58:46   talk about him the time the tow truck [TS]

00:58:47   guy and this guy over here with this [TS]

00:58:49   yeah and so fun but finally the tow [TS]

00:58:52   truck guy backed it into the to the in [TS]

00:58:55   front of the barn I tarped it and what [TS]

00:58:57   it is right now is a problem for the [TS]

00:59:00   future yeah what I think it's an [TS]

00:59:03   opportunity what I like to LeDoux as I [TS]

00:59:05   walk past it and I go March problem [TS]

00:59:07   mm-hmm that's a problem for March and [TS]

00:59:10   when March arrives it's gonna have come [TS]

00:59:11   a lot sooner than I expect I love the [TS]

00:59:14   item want to take you off this I love [TS]

00:59:16   the idea of the March problem it's a [TS]

00:59:17   March problem oh that's a March problem [TS]

00:59:19   yeah that is not a November problem it [TS]

00:59:21   is not a anywh a problem itself March [TS]

00:59:22   jesus take the wheel I'm not gonna think [TS]

00:59:24   about this for two months it's just yeah [TS]

00:59:26   when it's time it might be time I'm not [TS]

00:59:28   saying it's an August problem no no not [TS]

00:59:31   that good and the thing about King [TS]

00:59:32   Neptune I'm still King Neptune yes till [TS]

00:59:35   June with all rights therein - that's [TS]

00:59:38   right and and that's a June problem when [TS]

00:59:40   I get that's it like it this is a venti [TS]

00:59:43   I'm me I'm not I'm not blowing smoke up [TS]

00:59:45   your skirt this is a good thought [TS]

00:59:47   technology the March problem you've [TS]

00:59:49   already you've got it you figure out [TS]

00:59:50   where the problem goes you've got you [TS]

00:59:51   guys got a little Filofax for where it's [TS]

00:59:53   gonna go for for your calendar and when [TS]

00:59:55   March come not today not today like [TS]

00:59:57   Addie [TS]

00:59:58   like at one of those [TS]

00:59:58   like at one of those [TS]

01:00:00   railroad crossing things yeah the the [TS]

01:00:02   Bell starts sounding and the lights [TS]

01:00:04   start flashing a long time before the [TS]

01:00:06   arm drops yeah and you know that's [TS]

01:00:11   that's basically how you approach a [TS]

01:00:12   March problem like yellow light yellow [TS]

01:00:14   light March evening and there's March [TS]

01:00:16   and are you gonna get there before the [TS]

01:00:21   beginning you just before March is done [TS]

01:00:23   I feel like the reason it's a March [TS]

01:00:27   problem is that you get your RV ready in [TS]

01:00:31   March for what is ultimately your April [TS]

01:00:34   adventure so you're getting your March [TS]

01:00:38   problems are really your April [TS]

01:00:40   adventures it's just like your much pop [TS]

01:00:41   your April adventure yeah you're you're [TS]

01:00:43   you're you're May flowers bring June [TS]

01:00:46   showers or whatever it is yeah your [TS]

01:00:50   March problems are April adventures and [TS]

01:00:51   you need to you know it's all got its [TS]

01:00:54   its dominoes all the way down right yes [TS]

01:00:57   doesn't affect it's yeah right because [TS]

01:01:00   your April your April adventures yes are [TS]

01:01:03   your May gratifications but you can [TS]

01:01:07   still have April problems [TS]

01:01:08   you can have May adventures if you're [TS]

01:01:10   gonna have a and I have January problems [TS]

01:01:14   sure yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah a lot of [TS]

01:01:17   my March problems come from being like [TS]

01:01:19   November probably yeah I think I keep [TS]

01:01:22   thinking about is just even more like [TS]

01:01:24   I'm not a car guy I'm not a transit guy [TS]

01:01:26   I'm not a person who likes motion but [TS]

01:01:29   like I just keep coming back to the [TS]

01:01:30   fuckin clubhouse clubhouse like it wants [TS]

01:01:33   to be a clubhouse but like so that the [TS]

01:01:35   moisture and the distinctive odor does [TS]

01:01:38   that come from like one big hole or from [TS]

01:01:40   a million tiny cracks so a lot of the [TS]

01:01:42   thing about think about an RV is it's [TS]

01:01:44   too it's too long to handle torsion oh [TS]

01:01:49   it's an engineering problem yeah so when [TS]

01:01:52   you when you make a thing this long and [TS]

01:01:54   then you put it on the road where it's [TS]

01:01:56   going both up and down and side to side [TS]

01:01:57   it's got twisting forces it's like a [TS]

01:02:00   subway six-foot sub like there's gonna [TS]

01:02:02   be some turning and there's gonna be [TS]

01:02:03   motion it's a material science problem [TS]

01:02:05   there's just nothing that is flexible [TS]

01:02:07   and also sturdy extend [TS]

01:02:10   or perhaps somebody in here without 3d [TS]

01:02:12   printers going of the I beg to differ I [TS]

01:02:15   have I have created a polliver [TS]

01:02:20   but in yeah the 3d printing community [TS]

01:02:25   they're the worst in 1977 when this [TS]

01:02:29   thing was built out of used Corvette [TS]

01:02:31   parts what they did was they just like [TS]

01:02:34   zipped it together like you would an [TS]

01:02:36   IKEA thing alright but they had they had [TS]

01:02:39   like rubber covers yeah [TS]

01:02:45   and so everything everything that one [TS]

01:02:48   1978 no one's it from like 77 77 it's as [TS]

01:02:51   old as Star Wars yeah I bet they never a [TS]

01:02:54   god bless them the people in that [TS]

01:02:56   community I don't think they ever [TS]

01:02:58   intended that thing to still be around [TS]

01:02:59   now though they did that cave people [TS]

01:03:01   they're all aeronautical but the AGM or [TS]

01:03:04   as I like to call them go-go-go monkeys [TS]

01:03:11   let's just take the temperature of the [TS]

01:03:12   room how many people in here were born [TS]

01:03:14   before 1977 that is a very small [TS]

01:03:18   proportion of the people in here just [TS]

01:03:20   for comparison's sake how many people [TS]

01:03:23   were born after 1977 [TS]

01:03:26   [Applause] [TS]

01:03:28   so this GMC RV is sweet my daughter said [TS]

01:03:32   you know do you know anyone who's older [TS]

01:03:34   than you I've met people who are living [TS]

01:03:41   that other than me I've got I've got a [TS]

01:03:44   friend who's over 55 this thing is this [TS]

01:03:48   it's the equivalent of a Bugatti to us [TS]

01:03:51   like how the hell how do you keep and [TS]

01:03:53   keep this thing on the road but yeah but [TS]

01:03:55   so all the little every time that [TS]

01:03:57   someone at GM drilled a hole into that [TS]

01:04:00   fiberglass in order to put a light or a [TS]

01:04:03   mirror or a piece of chrome or a antenna [TS]

01:04:06   or anything yeah every one of those [TS]

01:04:08   things is now thinking to itself I'd [TS]

01:04:11   like to just wither and turn into a hole [TS]

01:04:15   rather than be a sealed like it's it's [TS]

01:04:18   as you get older your sphincter just [TS]

01:04:19   gets yes [TS]

01:04:21   you know what also but it's also a [TS]

01:04:23   torsion because because torsion would [TS]

01:04:26   there's two things that every engineer [TS]

01:04:27   knows about torsion it's cool and it's [TS]

01:04:29   patient right so that's the thing about [TS]

01:04:33   torsion torch and everything seems to be [TS]

01:04:34   fine everything's copacetic everything's [TS]

01:04:35   planning on Fletch it it's not like [TS]

01:04:37   studs or shooting out of the wall right [TS]

01:04:39   like it's gonna be very subtle it's [TS]

01:04:41   gonna be a little bit of what give me [TS]

01:04:44   some airplane motions you got Hugh you [TS]

01:04:46   got cry [TS]

01:04:51   yeah he got ya geeky and holiday right [TS]

01:04:56   right you got Yanni yo D you got yoni in [TS]

01:05:00   lingo lingo that's right guy yeah the [TS]

01:05:02   guy yeah all the different ways that a [TS]

01:05:04   plane can move in space some of them are [TS]

01:05:06   in all three of the dimensions and [TS]

01:05:08   that's a lot like what happens with the [TS]

01:05:11   the materials problem of a GMC RV it's [TS]

01:05:14   very very long right and so but the [TS]

01:05:16   stresses are gonna be very subtle right [TS]

01:05:18   in patient well like maybe by the time [TS]

01:05:20   of Empire Strikes Back everything was [TS]

01:05:22   still really great you get up to the [TS]

01:05:23   time of Return of the Jedi some of the [TS]

01:05:25   studs are getting a little bit curious [TS]

01:05:27   about what where else they could be [TS]

01:05:28   going right there are a lot of people in [TS]

01:05:30   the audience who were born in 1987 and [TS]

01:05:32   one day time is gonna make 1987 look [TS]

01:05:35   like 1967 yeah and that's when you're [TS]

01:05:39   gonna find the material science that [TS]

01:05:40   went into building you also starts due [TS]

01:05:44   to torsion and Gaia and come make it so [TS]

01:05:49   that your sealants and your your your [TS]

01:05:51   seals right also start to lose their [TS]

01:05:54   elasticity [TS]

01:05:55   yeah regardless of how much DeJohn you [TS]

01:05:57   get into the yoni you're still gonna be [TS]

01:06:00   a little bit of yo in the lingo that's [TS]

01:06:02   right and you're gonna be your and it's [TS]

01:06:03   gonna be resistance from the hue the hue [TS]

01:06:05   and the cry so you got the we got the [TS]

01:06:07   storm over here you got the drag over [TS]

01:06:09   there [TS]

01:06:10   1977 yep right and so right now the GMC [TS]

01:06:15   ERV like you all and like me mm-hmm [TS]

01:06:19   right now as it all happened to us at [TS]

01:06:21   one point we're gonna end up tarped in [TS]

01:06:23   front of somebody's barn [TS]

01:06:25   and the GMC RV got there first [TS]

01:06:27   [Music] [TS]

01:06:29   eventually they'll need to make room and [TS]

01:06:32   you'll be tarped outside the barn I want [TS]

01:06:35   to turn you won't be talking it's gonna [TS]

01:06:39   be a wet old RV and nobody can even open [TS]

01:06:42   the door anymore I love you grandpa [TS]

01:06:45   I I want to turn it into a clubhouse you [TS]

01:06:48   know I'd be a clubhouse you get a [TS]

01:06:50   dehumidifier [TS]

01:06:51   I got a dehumidifier I got one for home [TS]

01:06:53   I got one for the office I never looked [TS]

01:06:54   back you put it in there it'll suck the [TS]

01:06:56   shit yeah but it's the Scottish Castle [TS]

01:06:59   problem which is yeah every time I open [TS]

01:07:01   Sunset magazine I see one of those tiny [TS]

01:07:03   houses yeah and I think I want to put a [TS]

01:07:06   tiny house in my backyard [TS]

01:07:07   yeah as a yoga studio or as a Zumba [TS]

01:07:10   whatever that is studio or as it's [TS]

01:07:14   called limited motion Zumba yeah I guess [TS]

01:07:16   the very calm music and you make very [TS]

01:07:18   small motions I'll have a stand-up desk [TS]

01:07:21   and I'll do my architecture there [TS]

01:07:23   whatever it is but then I remember I [TS]

01:07:26   don't have any more friends than my [TS]

01:07:28   daughter and my her mother and my mother [TS]

01:07:29   and sister okay I don't want anyone [TS]

01:07:31   living around me I don't want people [TS]

01:07:33   waking me up in the morning my feet [TS]

01:07:36   don't borrow my bucket that's right and [TS]

01:07:37   so my buck you don't fill my bucket [TS]

01:07:39   don't do anything with my bucket what [TS]

01:07:40   part of me wants to put an apartment in [TS]

01:07:42   my yard [TS]

01:07:43   Oh yard apartment would be so bad it [TS]

01:07:45   will be boss but who would I put in [TS]

01:07:46   there what if you just going to go look [TS]

01:07:48   at a map really nice no no I don't mean [TS]

01:07:51   like a Rand McNally map like what if you [TS]

01:07:53   had a really good fucking historical map [TS]

01:07:54   and you could pull open the door and you [TS]

01:07:56   go in there you got your stuff safely [TS]

01:07:58   what if I would be in that thing all [TS]

01:08:01   that well I told you about how I used to [TS]

01:08:02   live in the Attic alive when I was a kid [TS]

01:08:04   yeah it'd be the same thing for me would [TS]

01:08:05   be like looking in attics epic that [TS]

01:08:06   wheels that don't go anywhere I would be [TS]

01:08:08   so into that except for the smell and I [TS]

01:08:09   get the dehumidifier okay second problem [TS]

01:08:11   all right [TS]

01:08:12   and I think this is the main problem [TS]

01:08:13   yeah the door and there's only one door [TS]

01:08:15   to the GMC RV it does not help by its [TS]

01:08:17   feature not a bug it has one door the [TS]

01:08:20   door faces the house if the RV is nose [TS]

01:08:24   in but I find [TS]

01:08:27   nose in parking aesthetically unpleasing [TS]

01:08:30   hmm I want rear in I want to [TS]

01:08:33   back a vehicle in yeah I don't want to [TS]

01:08:35   knows a vehicle in because we have to [TS]

01:08:38   get away that's right yep when it's time [TS]

01:08:40   to whenever see a cop go nose into a [TS]

01:08:42   space at once and then they're dead so [TS]

01:08:46   you don't you know we're always back in [TS]

01:08:47   always back you don't want to be in a [TS]

01:08:49   situation where you can't have a tarp [TS]

01:08:52   and the thing doesn't move that's right [TS]

01:08:53   back you back it in that way if you can [TS]

01:08:55   also defend your perimeter that way if [TS]

01:08:56   God forbid you had to defend against [TS]

01:08:58   about the Steelers in the zombies and [TS]

01:08:59   you had to be in the pilot of this great [TS]

01:09:01   craft you would be able to conduct your [TS]

01:09:03   turret gun with it for pointing out like [TS]

01:09:05   a gentleman huh that's right and and the [TS]

01:09:08   problem is if it's back in then the [TS]

01:09:10   front door faces Patrick's yard now and [TS]

01:09:12   Patrick's yard is full of but parts from [TS]

01:09:14   his like sewer reconstruction business [TS]

01:09:16   it's me it's not appealing I planted a [TS]

01:09:20   hedge of photo but the sewer [TS]

01:09:22   reconstruction business I have a hedge [TS]

01:09:24   of photinia but it hasn't grown up [TS]

01:09:26   enough and when it finally does I love [TS]

01:09:27   that band and the hedge of photinia Oh [TS]

01:09:29   God the shoegaze fans were so good at [TS]

01:09:32   dream they open for mission to Burma [TS]

01:09:33   that was really yeah go back to your [TS]

01:09:43   list what else you got these are these [TS]

01:09:44   are new leader this is real reader mail [TS]

01:09:46   otherwise [TS]

01:09:51   see yourself getting back in to it or is [TS]

01:09:55   there a little voice do you have a [TS]

01:09:56   little voice I bet you got a little bit [TS]

01:09:57   this don't answer it I see you soon as [TS]

01:10:01   you see you are being is a is an [TS]

01:10:03   activity for someone just slightly older [TS]

01:10:06   than me and maybe a little maybe [TS]

01:10:10   significantly should wait you should [TS]

01:10:12   wait and I you know when I got into it I [TS]

01:10:14   thought I would go to these RV [TS]

01:10:15   conventions and it'd be full like super [TS]

01:10:18   foxy people who were all like like in [TS]

01:10:21   the night you'd hear the doors open and [TS]

01:10:22   people tiptoeing between RVs you know [TS]

01:10:25   like I'm here like it was there was a [TS]

01:10:29   whole I I hoped it was a community and [TS]

01:10:31   in fact it's a community going this [TS]

01:10:34   swing a little bit or something fun [TS]

01:10:36   right but in the main way but like I got [TS]

01:10:38   a nice clean bit of Swing yes it's [TS]

01:10:40   sensual clean it's just healthy I mean [TS]

01:10:44   you know that you're all in RVs you're [TS]

01:10:45   not like weirdos you don't mind a little [TS]

01:10:47   you know you don't mind a little mildew [TS]

01:10:50   on the sill you know Sam but instead [TS]

01:10:52   every everybody everybody in the RV [TS]

01:10:56   community they're just in there painting [TS]

01:10:58   Ronan Minh [TS]

01:10:59   like they're not I imagine them making [TS]

01:11:02   ships [TS]

01:11:03   well ship making sure ships in bottles [TS]

01:11:05   you mean it could be a bottle I don't [TS]

01:11:08   know but I think they can fit ships and [TS]

01:11:10   lots of different things I wouldn't [TS]

01:11:11   constrain the imagination of a GMC RV [TS]

01:11:12   owner I think they are tiptoeing between [TS]

01:11:15   each other's RVs and having sex with [TS]

01:11:17   each other [TS]

01:11:17   but coital sex I think so but they are [TS]

01:11:21   past their prime reproductive years and [TS]

01:11:24   that [TS]

01:11:26   you don't think it's just you don't [TS]

01:11:27   think it's just finger-banging mostly [TS]

01:11:29   now come on guys we're adults here I [TS]

01:11:32   think wow I think it's here [TS]

01:11:33   is there anyone under the person here [TS]

01:11:36   the Janus person you're yelling at you [TS]

01:11:37   think you're the youngest person here [TS]

01:11:38   yell it out [TS]

01:11:39   come on the other anything people who [TS]

01:11:42   are teenagers here okay somebody over [TS]

01:11:46   here was mouth breathing and that's a [TS]

01:11:47   sign of being a teenager I think the [TS]

01:11:50   oxley I scored very well I'm well won't [TS]

01:11:53   migrate average I think there would be [TS]

01:11:55   more female man except the two the [TS]

01:11:58   capital C you're blasting the co here [TS]

01:11:59   the copilot seat are about as far apart [TS]

01:12:01   as these two seats you say you have to [TS]

01:12:04   really be like making a big big right [TS]

01:12:07   yeah but everything everything behind [TS]

01:12:10   the cockpit converts from something to [TS]

01:12:13   something else and that's just a dream [TS]

01:12:15   space of imagination for the finger [TS]

01:12:16   blaster in your life you could you could [TS]

01:12:18   be sitting listen you could just hear me [TS]

01:12:21   out you could be sitting there having a [TS]

01:12:22   perfectly serviceable homemade meal at [TS]

01:12:24   that table you flip the fucking table [TS]

01:12:26   over your legs are up in the air and [TS]

01:12:28   everybody's getting finger but right in [TS]

01:12:30   the back in the back is that a bench [TS]

01:12:32   sure it's a bench guess what I closed [TS]

01:12:34   the door now it's a bedroom right in [TS]

01:12:36   here in here come in here I had some [TS]

01:12:38   french onion onion soup I go on a blast [TS]

01:12:40   a tutor and guess what it turns it stuff [TS]

01:12:42   on now it's a shower come on in full [TS]

01:12:44   fingerblast this is a blast off from [TS]

01:12:48   every zone in this place you should [TS]

01:12:50   leave no surface on blasted it's a thing [TS]

01:12:54   that we don't get I'm ready this fog up [TS]

01:12:56   the fucking windows right in other [TS]

01:12:58   countries there are bathrooms that that [TS]

01:13:01   are small and turn into showers yeah and [TS]

01:13:04   we don't have that very much in the [TS]

01:13:05   United States but we mean it like in [TS]

01:13:06   like a normal house in just your [TS]

01:13:08   apartment right the bathroom is small [TS]

01:13:10   and there's a drain in the floor and [TS]

01:13:11   it's also a shower but I don't know if [TS]

01:13:13   anyone in the room has ever taken a [TS]

01:13:15   shower while you were also taking a shit [TS]

01:13:17   but it's two different or are willing to [TS]

01:13:21   admit it two different usages of the [TS]

01:13:23   word take yeah and and neither one [TS]

01:13:27   really the the normal one which is like [TS]

01:13:30   to take to take a drink they both say [TS]

01:13:32   that they're gonna leave they're gonna [TS]

01:13:34   leave a shit you're gonna yeah [TS]

01:13:35   you're gonna offer a shit but also like [TS]

01:13:37   you're not it's not just that you're [TS]

01:13:39   taking the shower right you're like it's [TS]

01:13:41   called respecting the Royals yeah but [TS]

01:13:43   it's a great experience I highly [TS]

01:13:45   recommend it to everybody [TS]

01:13:47   it's ATO like this really stands up with [TS]

01:13:49   the sandwich during sex it's that same [TS]

01:13:50   kind of thing if you could do more than [TS]

01:13:51   one thing at a time in that bathroom [TS]

01:13:52   shouldn't you you know just so many [TS]

01:13:55   options [TS]

01:13:56   it's already little bit of mildew smell [TS]

01:13:57   oh it's like a meatball in the bathtub [TS]

01:13:58   well when you told me there were balls I [TS]

01:14:07   was all thinking about your table I have [TS]

01:14:11   a desk I made up my own design oh won't [TS]

01:14:14   you sign it with your tiny pen [TS]

01:14:17   finger-blasting oh I could do this all [TS]

01:14:25   night it's stop laughing or I will I'll [TS]

01:14:28   scrape the mildew from your window see [TS]

01:14:31   you come smell my drapes [TS]

01:14:34   I would I would go to this show if you [TS]

01:14:44   did just a one-man off-broadway thing [TS]

01:14:45   where you just there's somebody in here [TS]

01:14:47   one day is gonna accent be somewhere be [TS]

01:14:49   a little bit high please listen to some [TS]

01:14:52   of my programs and pretty girls make [TS]

01:14:53   graves this song by the Smiths is gonna [TS]

01:14:55   come on the radio and they're gonna have [TS]

01:14:56   a lot of problems [TS]

01:15:01   listener Matt how he says if we're going [TS]

01:15:03   to join John and collecting Filson bags [TS]

01:15:05   what's a good price range on eBay for a [TS]

01:15:08   weekend sized Filson duffel bag and what [TS]

01:15:10   was the best era of Filson bag years to [TS]

01:15:13   look for answer any or all parts that [TS]

01:15:16   you want a phony award-winner this is [TS]

01:15:18   all gravy this is super difficult for me [TS]

01:15:20   because I hate to be up to do like free [TS]

01:15:24   advertising for this brand but I also [TS]

01:15:25   feel like yeah I've kind of given myself [TS]

01:15:27   this like they could do a lot more for [TS]

01:15:30   you know you see me having a Filson bag [TS]

01:15:33   right now they do a lot is reflective of [TS]

01:15:34   my life I don't have a Phil sin bag [TS]

01:15:36   the thing about this is the curious [TS]

01:15:37   thing about Phil some bags for those of [TS]

01:15:38   you who are curious they are not [TS]

01:15:40   actually an old thing Filson made [TS]

01:15:45   jackets and vests and shirts black pants [TS]

01:15:47   and boots [TS]

01:15:48   pants yeah and then in the 90s [TS]

01:15:51   someone at the Filson company said what [TS]

01:15:54   if we made luggage I thought that that [TS]

01:15:57   person was going in surprise but in fact [TS]

01:16:00   they were just preparing to cough and [TS]

01:16:03   that is the appropriate reaction to this [TS]

01:16:06   story it's very dull so anyway Matt Matt [TS]

01:16:10   Howie when you're just a little bit [TS]

01:16:13   lighter he's so good at GMC RVs here's [TS]

01:16:16   what's my remember there was a time I [TS]

01:16:18   had an anecdote about bags the bags at [TS]

01:16:22   the time were quite unusual in the sense [TS]

01:16:24   that they were neither particularly old [TS]

01:16:27   or demonstrable inu and the frost of the [TS]

01:16:32   anecdote was it there in light of the [TS]

01:16:34   bargain but now I'm there was a band [TS]

01:16:41   called the gits [TS]

01:16:42   the kids did not have the bags I believe [TS]

01:16:44   in yeah yeah I'm going to do my eBay [TS]

01:16:49   store this year and I'm going to sell [TS]

01:16:51   I'm going to sell my all listener Julie [TS]

01:16:54   says what's up with the eBay store yeah [TS]

01:16:57   I'm gonna sell so much stuff on there [TS]

01:17:00   it's gonna be amazing if you are an [TS]

01:17:02   extra large or know someone who is or [TS]

01:17:05   one or or want to be like someone in the [TS]

01:17:11   90s who's wearing clothes that were too [TS]

01:17:13   big for them huh or you want some bags [TS]

01:17:16   or you want some handed Ronan bags for [TS]

01:17:21   the extra-large right where you want [TS]

01:17:23   alike nesting dolls of different Russian [TS]

01:17:27   premiers my eBay store is gonna be the [TS]

01:17:31   thing for you and I think it's called I [TS]

01:17:34   don't know what it's called you got a [TS]

01:17:35   name on the account thing at some point [TS]

01:17:39   is it super it was Morgan Morgan Morgan [TS]

01:17:41   Morgan rides frickin hahaha that's it [TS]

01:17:45   that's catchy [TS]

01:17:46   yes good do you remember the story [TS]

01:17:48   behind Morgan rides free uh tell me [TS]

01:17:51   again when I was Freight hot I come up [TS]

01:17:53   with some kind of clever URL that you [TS]

01:17:55   could redirect Morgan rides for you URL [TS]

01:17:58   [Music] [TS]

01:17:59   any town USA one two three four five [TS]

01:18:03   when I was a teenager and I first [TS]

01:18:04   started hopping freights there were [TS]

01:18:06   still old men who wrote their handles in [TS]

01:18:09   chalk or in charcoal on the trains [TS]

01:18:12   they'd ridden like you know Bob's your [TS]

01:18:15   uncle was you know like March for hope a [TS]

01:18:18   little little Kilroy Was Here [TS]

01:18:21   noses and stuff like that and I needed a [TS]

01:18:24   handle and I didn't have a good one and [TS]

01:18:27   it was before I could really brand [TS]

01:18:29   things very well [TS]

01:18:30   yeah I'm not still not very good at [TS]

01:18:32   branding things hence the name of this [TS]

01:18:34   Morgan my my middle name is Morgan it is [TS]

01:18:44   I was super into riding free both free [TS]

01:18:49   on these trains that don't cost money [TS]

01:18:51   because you're I've been so much worse [TS]

01:18:53   that could be so much shittier Roderick [TS]

01:18:56   is blazed yeah and there are hobo [TS]

01:19:00   handles like that like there are 420 [TS]

01:19:03   who'll Tod 420 but but then and then I [TS]

01:19:06   tried to shorten it to Murph [TS]

01:19:09   MRF Murph like Murph and that wasn't [TS]

01:19:12   good and RF MRF Murph earth it could be [TS]

01:19:15   because it's icy it fix it fix it again [TS]

01:19:19   Tony capital and lowercase U and then [TS]

01:19:23   Morgan Morgan uber rides free and then [TS]

01:19:27   and then some then I was in a like a [TS]

01:19:30   briefly in a hip hop community where [TS]

01:19:32   there was a lot of tagging going on and [TS]

01:19:34   there was a suggestion that I needed a [TS]

01:19:35   tag and so they they decided that my tag [TS]

01:19:40   was eggs because I was an egghead and so [TS]

01:19:43   I was eggs but and so the nose ox I know [TS]

01:19:46   and then I saw a really really bad and I [TS]

01:19:49   was out trying to tag things with a [TS]

01:19:50   sharpie as like eggs to draw a [TS]

01:19:52   photorealistic a the thing is that [TS]

01:19:55   nice ones over medium much hit it [TS]

01:19:57   through long if you look at the if you [TS]

01:19:59   look at the history of tags and hip-hop [TS]

01:20:01   you will see that the people don't use [TS]

01:20:03   the letter G very often because it's not [TS]

01:20:06   very smooth like there's not a cool [TS]

01:20:08   smooth way to it's like trying to get [TS]

01:20:10   the app switcher on your iPhone 10 yeah [TS]

01:20:12   right like if you've got gesture like if [TS]

01:20:14   you've got a spray can and you're doing [TS]

01:20:15   a that's really nice like even a bee but [TS]

01:20:19   like G kind of ends and so I started [TS]

01:20:21   doing those G's that are like little [TS]

01:20:24   circle big circle and kind of trying to [TS]

01:20:26   make him look like eggs like a 14 year [TS]

01:20:28   old girl yeah but then but then I [TS]

01:20:30   realized that that was really egg headed [TS]

01:20:32   of me and I was living up to my name [TS]

01:20:38   that's right but there's no good we I [TS]

01:20:41   need a lot of time for our D focusing on [TS]

01:20:43   Suzie [TS]

01:20:43   first of all does anybody have things [TS]

01:20:45   that they would like to oh sure there [TS]

01:20:46   are a lot of questions well I want to [TS]

01:20:47   make sure I don't cut the scene but have [TS]

01:20:48   things they would like to ask John this [TS]

01:20:49   could be very very short oh well why [TS]

01:20:51   don't we bring up the help well let me [TS]

01:20:52   let me just maybe one more you pick you [TS]

01:20:54   pick here's your options o listener [TS]

01:20:58   Shannon wants to know how the house [TS]

01:20:59   renovations are coming they're fine [TS]

01:21:03   I thought for a while that I had bats [TS]

01:21:05   are I had rats in the walls again and I [TS]

01:21:08   couldn't figure out how they were [TS]

01:21:08   getting in and then I realized I had [TS]

01:21:10   bats no rats dispensed had bats in the [TS]

01:21:12   Attic and they got in because one it's [TS]

01:21:14   not Castle tats no it's bad it's bats [TS]

01:21:17   and I and I realized that that Psalm [TS]

01:21:20   when I asked him to plug the hole that I [TS]

01:21:23   knew was next to the was next to the [TS]

01:21:25   chimney psalm told me that he had but he [TS]

01:21:29   hadn't because it's a real game of [TS]

01:21:32   whack-a-mole with song [TS]

01:21:33   yes he's something fairly specific over [TS]

01:21:35   here and he goes around the corner he's [TS]

01:21:36   got a different thing yeah I didn't go [TS]

01:21:37   up with the Tanners gutter ladders that [TS]

01:21:38   it would take to get up there to say [TS]

01:21:40   like no this hole and so he didn't plug [TS]

01:21:42   in and now bats are coming in that's a [TS]

01:21:44   good I don't think oh yeah did you find [TS]

01:21:47   out where he peed Psalm no I think he [TS]

01:21:49   peed in the feta nia over by a show of [TS]

01:21:51   hands for anybody who doesn't okay [TS]

01:21:52   listen here's the thing John had Psalm [TS]

01:21:54   coming out to his house for about eight [TS]

01:21:55   years he came out almost every day [TS]

01:21:57   sometimes he wouldn't show up for six [TS]

01:21:58   weeks song came out to his house as his [TS]

01:22:00   contractor friend and companion it was [TS]

01:22:02   kind of like a Green Hornet and Kato [TS]

01:22:03   type situation show of hands [TS]

01:22:06   psalm never peed the entire time he was [TS]

01:22:09   ever at the house clapping I'm pretty [TS]

01:22:11   cold on that that's good okay okay all [TS]

01:22:14   right you know god bless you [TS]

01:22:16   other show hands saw I'm just fuckin [TS]

01:22:18   ruin that yard with P show of hands [TS]

01:22:20   it just stands so easy no I don't think [TS]

01:22:23   so [TS]

01:22:24   you think there's something in his [TS]

01:22:25   makeup at being ping-pong you see [TS]

01:22:26   there's something about something says [TS]

01:22:27   in this line you do not cross you do not [TS]

01:22:30   pee on this on this territory you think [TS]

01:22:31   he just knew I was respect [TS]

01:22:33   it's like Henry Hill as a teenager psalm [TS]

01:22:35   escaped from the killing fields of [TS]

01:22:37   Cambodia and found his way we had to pee [TS]

01:22:40   really bad his way through Thailand to [TS]

01:22:42   my house to all the way to fixing my [TS]

01:22:44   porch and and lying to me about the hole [TS]

01:22:46   in the roof I'm pretty sure that Psalm [TS]

01:22:49   can hold his pee for six hours but also [TS]

01:22:52   the fact that I have bats and not rats [TS]

01:22:54   is now inhibiting me adopting veto [TS]

01:22:56   because vetoes that kind of kung-fu veto [TS]

01:23:00   was a rat killer oh and oh this is this [TS]

01:23:03   is how the cat the cat okay I don't know [TS]

01:23:04   if you know this but it's illegal to [TS]

01:23:06   kill bats in the United States [TS]

01:23:07   you see illegal to kill bats in the [TS]

01:23:08   United States that federal you can't I [TS]

01:23:11   see USC type situation does anybody know [TS]

01:23:13   what laws or a battle here [TS]

01:23:21   to the appellate court Robin I'm the [TS]

01:23:24   real bat lawyer I'm not gonna bury [TS]

01:23:27   another bat lawyer uh we should get to [TS]

01:23:30   the questions there was a second there [TS]

01:23:31   was a big request actually from a guest [TS]

01:23:33   of yours hears that you talk about the [TS]

01:23:35   Hitchhiker's Guide to the galaxy movie [TS]

01:23:38   but we probably don't have time for that [TS]

01:23:40   the person the the thing when you said [TS]

01:23:42   what should we talk about was you they [TS]

01:23:44   wanted me to talk about that [TS]

01:23:45   Hitchhiker's Guide to the galaxy movie [TS]

01:23:47   listener 20:49 says honestly the only [TS]

01:23:51   thing comes to mind was the airport John [TS]

01:23:52   was about to give his opinion on the [TS]

01:23:54   Hitchhiker's Guide to the galaxy movie [TS]

01:23:56   before changing topics and never coming [TS]

01:23:58   back to it we have a hard out at 9:30 [TS]

01:24:01   right this is one of the that story The [TS]

01:24:04   Hitchhiker's Guide to the galaxy story [TS]

01:24:05   is one of the real long tale Roderick on [TS]

01:24:08   the line stories it's gonna come back [TS]

01:24:10   eventually okay we'll come back to that [TS]

01:24:11   well we should we should probably you [TS]

01:24:12   know might like my wife and daughter are [TS]

01:24:14   reading that right now are they it's a [TS]

01:24:15   wonderful book it's a very good book I [TS]

01:24:17   get to the third book it's not funny [TS]

01:24:18   anymore [TS]

01:24:19   all right I want to take questions [TS]

01:24:21   because I know there are some [TS]

01:24:22   enthusiastic ones yeah but Mike or [TS]

01:24:24   should we no no just yell oh that was [TS]

01:24:30   gone I there's a lot of turnover in the [TS]

01:24:32   neighborhood no I have never had the [TS]

01:24:35   house that I still I did LSD in college [TS]

01:24:39   and it was a bad idea and then I did LSD [TS]

01:24:43   again and again and I said it so much of [TS]

01:24:46   the LSD and I really regret it cuz [TS]

01:24:47   there's times when I have things [TS]

01:24:49   happening in my life that I think are [TS]

01:24:50   real and that was a lot like that day [TS]

01:24:53   with the Chinese food but I was there [TS]

01:24:54   yeah you say you were there that's true [TS]

01:24:57   this is exactly what I expect from Lucy [TS]

01:25:00   I feel like they went back back to Alpha [TS]

01:25:02   Centauri yeah how the hell if not having [TS]

01:25:05   a lobster on that you know what they did [TS]

01:25:06   they were like we need to learn to make [TS]

01:25:07   tea and then we come back I think well I [TS]

01:25:10   think what they said is like let's chow [TS]

01:25:11   let's just kind of float this on a [TS]

01:25:12   couple obviously this place is going to [TS]

01:25:15   be a training ground for teaching Grey's [TS]

01:25:17   she kind of mostly pretend right that [TS]

01:25:21   they that they that their normals hence [TS]

01:25:24   the looks anybody else have another [TS]

01:25:25   question anyone it's okay if you don't [TS]

01:25:28   don't [TS]

01:25:29   or you know ma'am there on the side does [TS]

01:25:37   John have a favorite piece of hate mail [TS]

01:25:39   and if so what is it well just thinking [TS]

01:25:48   about that eyelid this is not asked to [TS]

01:25:49   meet you rating yeah no go ahead there's [TS]

01:25:52   new kind of favorite genre I think I [TS]

01:25:53   think this is a spin-off of Twitter as a [TS]

01:25:56   genre and my new favorite is just when [TS]

01:25:59   anybody is such a fan of what I do that [TS]

01:26:01   they take the time to reach out to me [TS]

01:26:02   for the first time with a grievance and [TS]

01:26:04   a hostility and it's just it's so nice [TS]

01:26:07   to find out that somebody is a fan it's [TS]

01:26:09   not even it's not even a shit sandwich [TS]

01:26:11   is the shit shit which of just how [TS]

01:26:14   terribly disappointed they are such a [TS]

01:26:16   fan for 15 years and really I just can't [TS]

01:26:19   even anymore that's a nice that's a nice [TS]

01:26:21   Jean Ron it's nice to disappoint people [TS]

01:26:23   you haven't met yet and then find out [TS]

01:26:24   later my favorite piece of email [TS]

01:26:27   actually was generated here in San [TS]

01:26:28   Francisco [TS]

01:26:29   oh by I know in fact I think you were so [TS]

01:26:31   proud I think it was Sacramento it [TS]

01:26:33   actually came from because I [TS]

01:26:37   hi I played a show with the with my band [TS]

01:26:40   the long winters at the independent a [TS]

01:26:42   club here and yeah that was that right [TS]

01:26:45   and that was the show where I came out [TS]

01:26:46   at the beginning of the show playing [TS]

01:26:49   like a big electric guitar soul which we [TS]

01:26:51   usually save for the end of the show and [TS]

01:26:53   in the course of playing my dramatic [TS]

01:26:54   excellent guitar solo I fell backwards [TS]

01:26:58   over my amplifier into a hole created by [TS]

01:27:03   drums and amplifier part no stage area [TS]

01:27:06   yeah there were some cars back there [TS]

01:27:08   which I landed on breaking one in half [TS]

01:27:11   and then still the band kept playing cuz [TS]

01:27:15   they know what to do when you say it [TS]

01:27:17   happened in slow motion [TS]

01:27:18   it doesn't really capture how long it [TS]

01:27:20   took for this to happen it was not an [TS]

01:27:22   easy fall it was not like a dead wood [TS]

01:27:24   help me with my fall fall this is more [TS]

01:27:26   like it's like crunch with my feet oh [TS]

01:27:35   the only thing visible is my feet up in [TS]

01:27:37   the air but from behind they call that [TS]

01:27:38   the annual exam I can I continued to [TS]

01:27:43   solo and then flopped over climbed up [TS]

01:27:50   got back to the front of the stage still [TS]

01:27:52   playing guitar the band was still [TS]

01:27:53   playing I was like yeah right and at [TS]

01:27:56   that time I had really long hair and I [TS]

01:27:58   was missing a front tooth as you do and [TS]

01:28:00   I got a letter from a woman who said I [TS]

01:28:03   am a really big fan of your band I [TS]

01:28:05   really love your record when I pretend [TS]

01:28:08   to fall this is the first time I ever [TS]

01:28:09   son came to see you play reaching out [TS]

01:28:12   and you had so little respect for the [TS]

01:28:13   audience to come out so stinking drunk [TS]

01:28:17   at which point you know and this at this [TS]

01:28:20   point I had been sober 17 years sit [TS]

01:28:22   still very disrespectful and then she [TS]

01:28:25   said and you proceeded to play every [TS]

01:28:27   song different from the album and you [TS]

01:28:29   did all this talking about God no [TS]

01:28:32   chemtrails and whatever else [TS]

01:28:34   and like why didn't you just put on a [TS]

01:28:36   professional show I'm really [TS]

01:28:37   disillusioned what did you say well I [TS]

01:28:39   was like that's the show what's in the [TS]

01:28:41   show is in the shows it's true [TS]

01:28:43   okay one more yeah okay we got a gal [TS]

01:28:47   question somebody that really feel [TS]

01:28:49   strong [TS]

01:28:49   Oh album coming that's great that's [TS]

01:28:53   great thank you I really I really was [TS]

01:28:59   hoping someone would ask more question [TS]

01:29:10   that is not one that's trying to kill me [TS]

01:29:12   yes [TS]