110: ‘Rats in the Lobby’ With Guest Merlin Mann
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You still there?
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You know what I did?
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Oh, you sound so much better.
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You know what I did?
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I plugged it into a different USB port.
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I think this is probably the last episode I'll record using this old Air.
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Oh, are you going to go to the new iMac?
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No, well yeah, I guess I should.
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I don't know why I don't record using the iMac.
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I don't know.
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The Air is powerful enough to do that?
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It's probably why the show sounds like shit.
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No, you know what? And I actually know that this this old MacBook Air that I've used I I do it because I'm in some ways I'm a sentimental idiot and I think I've recorded like every episode of the talk show for I don't know at least the last three four years using that air so I want to keep doing
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doing. Yeah, I mean you said... It makes no technical sense. No, none at all, but you said not too long ago
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how in baseball, as baseball fans, there are people who are into the numbers and people who are into the story
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and that you're a story guy. Right. Right. And yeah, you know, the MacPulgaras got a story. When I stopped
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using my Rode, I was pretty nervous because I was like, I've been using this since 43 folders, MacBreak Weekly,
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like, you know, it's so dumb. I'm just changing to a better mic. Why would that matter? It shouldn't, but I
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I felt like a little bit disloyal.
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What did you switch to?
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Well, I tried a couple of things.
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I'm using a Shure SM7B now.
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It's super annoying because I got to go through this PreSonus
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Oh, I don't want that.
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I think Marco was telling me about that.
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I don't want to do that.
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You know, I think I just listen to too much rock music.
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When people have these conversations about stuff,
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I just don't hear it.
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I don't hear what they're talking about.
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And it makes me feel like a charlatan.
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Like I don't, I mean I can notice in production values
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like when like the public radio show with a budget
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sounds different than three guys talking about Linux.
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But like I don't notice that much about mics and stuff.
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- No, I don't.
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- Yeah, you don't listen to a lot of podcasts though.
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- Oh, I mean I don't listen to a lot,
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but I listen to enough.
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But when I do, I'm listening with earbuds.
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So I don't think, and a lot of times I would say
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easily 85% of the time I'm listening to podcasts I'm walking through the city so
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there's so much noise you know it's the quality of the mic I mean I hope you
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know I I understand why people make it sound as good as they can but I could
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never hear the difference between microphones did you uh never get your
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driver's license back I didn't lose my driver's license today you probably
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don't remember it was on an episode of the talk show with Dan and you had the holiday party.
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It's my favorite episode of the talk show and you talked about how they took your license away.
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You don't remember you probably don't remember that. It was the holiday season. It's a lot to
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remember. Yeah I don't remember. Why did they take my license away? Oh I made it up. I made it up.
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That's right now I remember. Oh God now I remember. Because you had so many points.
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Right I had so many points. And you refused to go to traffic school and Dan you know to Dan's credit
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He played the entire episode straight. It was really funny. Oh, that was a good that was HR HR
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fluffy puff, you know and I got I
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Should write that down for the show notes. I got I
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Think most people got it, but I definitely got a fair amount of email from listeners who were telling me. Hey, you know
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Maybe you ought to get some help
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So, you know, that's not funny. It's not funny racking up all those points, you know
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You know how that hurts the government?
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- Well, they're like, you're gonna learn a lesson
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when you hit a kid crossing the street or something.
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- For Christ's sakes, John, you got a kid.
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Jesus Christ.
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I'm so tired of words.
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I'm just gonna stop saying things.
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It's just, I give up.
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I give up, I'm just gonna make grunts
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and maybe sing a humble little tune.
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But no matter what you say,
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I made a crack last night on the Twitter
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about how I wish Netflix, in streaming five seasons of MASH,
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the five good seasons of mesh,
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how I wish they would have it without the laugh track.
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And oh my God, I got so many responses from people,
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on the one hand telling me how that's physically impossible
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since it's hard coded.
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And then other people going,
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"Sir, did you know that you could err the DVD tracks?"
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I was like, yeah, you know what?
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I know all of that, I know all of that.
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I was just making a joke.
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It's just, it's an ephemeral comment.
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It's okay, everything's gonna be fine.
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You must get that like to the 10th power,
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especially like when you're being jokey about
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sports, technology. You must get so many
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wackadoodle responses from people.
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It goes and flows. I can never predict though.
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post some kind of, you know, absurd tweet and I think, "Oh God, I'm gonna get so many
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people who take this seriously."
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And then there's nothing. And then I throw one out that I'm not even worried about and
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everybody, you know. Jon, there is absolutely no way
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I make a lot of news-related "Your Mother" jokes and every time I expect
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incredible blowback. Nothing. That's fine. That's awesome. I make one crack about
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Mash having a laugh track and like the entire peanut gallery rises as one. But
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you know it's it's good. I'm just tired of words.
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What was the deal with Mash's laugh track? The way I recall it is season one
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there was no laugh track and it was a ratings it was it was precipitous that
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it was like the ratings were so bad that it was on the border of not coming back
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for another season and that they one of the one of the changes they made between
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season one season two is they added a laugh track yeah I don't I remember
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having read because you know it most people who enjoy the mass show it's a
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pretty hot topic because you can on the DVDs I don't own the DVDs I hate DVDs I
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hate physical media I don't want them in my house I mean that's me that's my
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Court of Last Resort like I've got I've got all the James Bond films like
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everybody you know I bought that hundred dollar blu-ray package I got that I got
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the Godfather and then I think I got a Dora or something like that but that's about it
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and but yeah they had an alternate track where you could have the audio without the laugh
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track I don't remember exactly how it happened except I mean think about the time what is
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that 72 73 something like that where every every like three camera sitcom had a live
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audience like you got your all in the families and stuff and I think you know it probably
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seemed a little dead to people and some of the humor is probably was probably a
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little bit dry it's just that it suddenly became not very dry when
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there's a very obvious laugh on it I just I really hate laugh tracks yeah
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they just they drive me crazy and you can actually go and you know if you know
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where to go I know you don't do these things but you can find copies of it and
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it is actually a pretty different experience you go watch my favorite
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episode Abyssinia Henry the one where Henry leaves you remember that episode
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It's the end of season three.
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I'm sure that it's...
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It's the one where he dies, he gets shot out of the air, and it's the episode right before Trapper leaves.
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It's the end of the season, and it's got that amazing scene at the end where Radar walks into the operating room and reads the notice that Henry's dead.
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It's incredibly moving. And watching that episode without the laugh track is a real different thing, because it's one of the great episodes of TV.
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and you know you know it's good maybe in a way that people at that time wouldn't
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know it's good so it feels a little insulting you know to have to put all of
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that on it's not super loud like on some shows like 90 shows where the left track
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got so loud but yeah but it always felt to me even as a kid and and growing up
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in an era when all sitcoms had laugh tracks or as live studio audience and
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even though one's at live studio audience you know that they were the
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the laughter pretty loud sometimes yeah it always seemed incongruous because it
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clearly was not shot in front of the live studio audience it was shot on real
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you know like a soundstage yeah like you know in that case of mash it's like
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they're shooting it outdoors there's not people on bleachers there right and the
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production values were always such I mean clearly in hindsight I mean
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everybody knew it was a smash hit eventually it became a smash hit you
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know after a couple seasons and it was you know like it was always like I think
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it was always like number one or number two was 60 minutes you know it was
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always like a fight which was gonna be the top-rated show of the week and at a
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time. 60 minutes man that was a juggernaut remember that was just like almost always
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it was it was 60 minutes or something else for a little while it was always 60
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minutes. It was always number one or number two it felt like your civic
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obligation as an American was Sunday night at 7 everybody you know from 7 to
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70 would sit down and watch 60 minutes. Mm-hmm yeah the other thing that's funny
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about mash is and this is you know it sounds nasty I don't mean it to be but
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it's funny the that you know like three of the stars of that show left because
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they wanted a better deal or they wanted more attention you know Wayne Rogers as
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trapper mclean Stevenson you know he was done with it and later on Larry Linville
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had decided he was done with the Frank Burns character and you know none of them
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ever found anything approaching that again it's such a bummer oh what was the
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guy who replaced Frank Burns Winchester right yeah he was yeah and he was there
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was tough it was a tough one because what you could tell Winchester was
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actually a good surgeon yes we knew Frank was a you know it was a good show
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it was good that your it is interesting it's interesting in so many ways it was
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a good movie that started it and then they you know didn't have any of the
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any of the same actors from the movie come.
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- We had Gary Burghoff was in the movie.
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- Oh, Radar.
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- Radar, yeah.
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And the first season is much closer
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in the kind of anarchic spirit.
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- It's much closer to the film.
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But yeah, it got, you know, like anything though,
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I think they kind of, they started this great thing.
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There was a great episode where Hawkeye writes to his dad.
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There's an episode called Dear Dad.
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- I remember that one, I remember that.
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- It was really good.
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It's from like, I don't know, first second season.
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And but then they did like, remember then they had like,
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Dear Peg, and then they had Dear Father Mulcahy writes
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and eventually, Alan Arbus, remember the psychiatrist,
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he's writing to Sigmund Freud at some point,
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like an open letter or something, it got really bananas.
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But it was a good show, I mean, it was really of its time.
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But by the end, it was just, it was so insufferable.
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Even as a flaming liberal, I can't watch that show.
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It's such a pantomime of, you know, politics.
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- I haven't seen it in a long time.
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I don't remember it petering out at toward the end and I remember the last episode was oh man was a tobacco with the chicken
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Oh, it's just and Hawkeye still haunts me still haunts me committed or something and yeah cuz the chicken chicken
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I don't know. I was always obsessed. That's another like lifelong obsession obsession for me and like a minor one is
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Final episodes of shows I'll watch the last episode of a show that I've never even watched just to see how they you know
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I like a last episode
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Yeah, and I I watched mash I you know, I watched it I watched the reruns, you know
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It was a staple in our household like flipping through the stations like waiting for dinner to be ready
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Everybody could agree we'd watch mash, you know, and the reruns were you know, like 530 or something like that. So it was
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You know and the reruns were still were on while the show was still wrapping up I think and absolutely absolutely
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Yeah, and I think their last episode for a long time was the highest rated like non
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Bowl type yeah definitely was yeah yeah it was like a national event and
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everybody was like what the hell was that kind of went on yeah how does it
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play now like watching any of those episodes with Jamie farce character what
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was his name clinger clinger clinger how could I forget that so clear for anybody
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who isn't familiar clinger was played by Jamie far and he did not want to serve
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in the army this is who doesn't know he was drafted he was drafted with these
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kids and he knew that there was something that you could get if you were
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mentally unsound to serve in the army you could get a dis get a section 8 or
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something section 8 so he's always angling for section 8 so how do you
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convince the army that you're crazy you dress like Carmen Miranda you're women's
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clothes right so he wore a woman's women's clothing all the time and you
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know it didn't work everybody knew what his stick was but he never let up on it
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so he still he still did his job that's the right he showed up just like a nurse
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but then he was a pretty good nurse that's part of the problem you guys I
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think you should undermine the basic task that you're doing or do them in it's
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such a bananas way that it's clear that you're crazy you know what I'm saying
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right hey you know it's it's okay I think the earlier seasons are better you
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know it's so funny with TV shows it always takes them a few episodes or a
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season to find their legs and then you know things kind of seem to go for a
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while I can't imagine doing a TV show it just seems so exhausting. Oh totally of
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any kind. Yeah. Whether it's you know like like like well like the this very day
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like yes last night was as we record yesterday was the day Jon Stewart
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announced that he was going to step down from the Daily Show and then it's like
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he said something during the show did you watch I watched and it was like no
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what'd you say I think he said he's been doing it for 17 years and I looked at I
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I was watching with Amy and I was like, "Well, that can't be." And then I was like thinking about it. I was like, "Holy shit."
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And then I'm like, "Well, of course he's gonna step down. He's been doing this show four days a week for 17 years."
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Yeah, and I know, I mean talking to in particular Hodgman and Rob Corddry about it, people
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I know who've been on that show and work with him all say the same thing.
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Which is that, first of all, he's a very nice guy and you know,
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he's a good guy, but also that he is one of the hardest, he's the hardest working person in the building.
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So when Hajim will go on there he would have like kind of a prepared bit and then I mean, you know
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He's I don't think he was the showrunner, but he he was involved in like every rewrite up until camp
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I mean like he was making everybody in the room better on every episode
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Can you imagine doing that for over 15 years like what that would take out of you?
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No, and I think that I have trouble ordering groceries and and this guy is doing that every single night
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think it's very clear to that he you know and
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it put it in sports ball terms he's a good he was like a good passer in
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basketball like he was not concerned obviously he's the host of the show he's
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you know the one who does the whole first half single-handedly on on air at
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least obviously with the help of writers but as soon as anybody else is on
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whether it's a bit at the desk like a Hodgman thing or anything else it's he
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is so a hundred percent concentrated on making that other person look as good as
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as they possibly can and make sure that they get
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as many of the laughs as they possibly can.
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- I totally agree and I mean, you can look to our hero
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as like the paragon of that.
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I mean, Carson was so good, whoever that was,
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like whether that was Burt Reynolds
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or whether that was some grandmother
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that had done something crazy, he was so generous.
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I mean, I think even if he wasn't loving,
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I think Fred de Cordova would be the one
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who kind of stepped in and go,
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"Okay, we're ready to go to commercial."
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Carson would sometimes give him the hand signal.
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But he was there and fully committed
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to whatever was happening
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and wanted to make that person look good
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and it made everybody look good.
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- Yeah, exactly.
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So I was surprised, I have to say,
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just to commit to that the whole late night shuffling,
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I was a little surprised when Letterman announced
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his retirement that Jon Stewart didn't get that,
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or maybe he didn't want it.
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if he was thinking about stepping down from this,
00:15:53
◼
►
you know, on a daily basis,
00:15:54
◼
►
maybe that's just it, he didn't wanna, you know,
00:15:56
◼
►
he just didn't wanna do a daily show anymore.
00:15:58
◼
►
I always thought that Jon Stewart would be an excellent,
00:16:01
◼
►
you know, like Letterman's style show host.
00:16:06
◼
►
- Yeah, yeah, I agree.
00:16:08
◼
►
And, you know, it's funny to think about
00:16:09
◼
►
like what the world was like when Letterman started
00:16:11
◼
►
and it would be impossible to explain to somebody today,
00:16:15
◼
►
probably in the same way that Steve Allen,
00:16:17
◼
►
like to us, Steve Allen seems like an old guy.
00:16:19
◼
►
But Steve Allen's show broke the mold.
00:16:22
◼
►
I mean, there'd never been anybody on TV
00:16:24
◼
►
quite like Steve Allen, who was so kind of, you know,
00:16:26
◼
►
cultural and witty and smart,
00:16:29
◼
►
but also would do such crazy stunts
00:16:32
◼
►
and that had a huge influence on Letterman.
00:16:34
◼
►
And then Letterman comes along and, you know,
00:16:36
◼
►
they had that crazy deal with Carson.
00:16:38
◼
►
You know about all this, right?
00:16:39
◼
►
Like, they had a guy from Carson's production team there
00:16:44
◼
►
who basically made sure that he's like,
00:16:47
◼
►
"Okay, here's your show, here's the rules.
00:16:48
◼
►
Like you can't book anybody who's like one of Johnny's regulars.
00:16:52
◼
►
You know Johnny gets the first bite of any of these particular apples.
00:16:55
◼
►
There's all kinds of rules but that was a constraint that he worked and brought in Larry
00:16:59
◼
►
Budd Millman or he brought in Chris Elliott and that made the show so much more fun and
00:17:04
◼
►
so much weirder than if that awkward young David Letterman was trying to interview you
00:17:08
◼
►
know Madonna.
00:17:09
◼
►
Yeah I think most famously there were restrictions on the length of the monologue and so.
00:17:15
◼
►
Oh because that's Johnny's thing.
00:17:16
◼
►
it was Johnny's thing and so like on the old Letterman show
00:17:19
◼
►
Letterman would come out and do three jokes and they were so perfunctory like the the bit was almost like his complete disdain for the
00:17:27
◼
►
Monologue he would just come out and do three
00:17:29
◼
►
Really clipped perfunctory jokes and then it was on to the desk and the rest
00:17:35
◼
►
And you know the part that made it the part that made it funny every night was how terrible he made it seem like he thought
00:17:41
◼
►
It was like that was a terrible joke and him adjusting his tie and like the kind of face
00:17:46
◼
►
You know, that's what made it funny, right? So like they took the restrictions from Carson productions on the monologue and
00:17:51
◼
►
And I think eventually like I think once it settled in and it was very clear
00:17:56
◼
►
I didn't I don't think it took long for Carson and his people to realize that Letterman was no threat to Carson
00:18:02
◼
►
Like there was no way that that Letterman was ever going to steal his job, right?
00:18:08
◼
►
Right, like it's just not that type of person and you know, he was fine
00:18:11
◼
►
You know, I think you know, I famously he wanted it and when when the time came in when Johnny retired
00:18:16
◼
►
But he was never going to backstab him if his ratings had you know, they fight he's never seen
00:18:22
◼
►
He's never seen anything like completely grateful
00:18:24
◼
►
Like when he tells the story and I guess the first time he was on and got called over to the couch
00:18:29
◼
►
Like he honestly he still sounds like a kid like what a what a moving moment that was for him to get to do that
00:18:35
◼
►
Yeah, so I think that eventually I don't think it took long where if if he had wanted to do longer monologues
00:18:40
◼
►
I don't really think that the phone was going to ring in the Carson people were going to say hey,
00:18:44
◼
►
you know, you were, you know, you know, you're only supposed to do two minutes of monologue
00:18:47
◼
►
and you did 230 last night. But I think that they just embraced that anti monologue, you know,
00:18:53
◼
►
that that just became part of the signature of the show. Oh, yeah. And I mean, that's a beat it
00:18:57
◼
►
to death. But I think about the stuff that I remember, when I would hear somebody was going
00:19:01
◼
►
to be on, I would get so excited. And certainly there's famous scenes where like Drew Barrymore
00:19:06
◼
►
acted all crazy or Crispin Glover was all you know nuts that one time and tried to
00:19:10
◼
►
think he was gonna kick him those are famous but what do you really remember
00:19:13
◼
►
from the first three years I mean you you remember people like Harvey Pekar
00:19:17
◼
►
you remember people like Charles Grodin you remember you remember people being
00:19:21
◼
►
on there who or like Jeff Jeff Altman I love Jeff Altman like he would be so
00:19:27
◼
►
very 20-pound butt steak you know and that's what made the show and then like
00:19:33
◼
►
the prancing fluids and all that stuff that was the product of that probation
00:19:38
◼
►
like is what made the show good it would not have lasted as long if it had been
00:19:41
◼
►
just another show Harvey P car I haven't thought about him in maybe 20 years so
00:19:46
◼
►
Charles Grodin it was a bit yeah whenever Charles Grodin was on Carson or
00:19:50
◼
►
lettering you got that it was kind of a bit but Harvey P car genuinely seemed to
00:19:53
◼
►
hate Dave and hate the idea of being on the show at all right and was just a
00:19:58
◼
►
miserable person quite frankly it was not very attractive either so it wasn't
00:20:02
◼
►
really like you know people like looking at him and so I think any normal talk
00:20:07
◼
►
show would be like I don't know who booked him but they're fired and make
00:20:11
◼
►
sure we never have him back again whereas the letterman people like let's
00:20:13
◼
►
have this guy back on every couple months. Oh absolutely and it was true
00:20:17
◼
►
for I mean I think Jeff Altman is you know one of his great repeat guests I
00:20:22
◼
►
mean he would he loved having Jeff Altman on partly because I think I you
00:20:25
◼
►
know I have to tell you if you don't already know about this I'm cribbing
00:20:28
◼
►
some of this from a podcast have you heard the podcast the Carson podcast? No.
00:20:32
◼
►
Oh, you should know about this.
00:20:33
◼
►
There's a show this guy in LA does, this comedian in LA.
00:20:36
◼
►
I think it's called the Carson Podcast.
00:20:37
◼
►
And the whole podcast is him interviewing
00:20:40
◼
►
people who have some kind of an interesting relationship
00:20:42
◼
►
with the Carson show.
00:20:44
◼
►
Yeah, it was great.
00:20:45
◼
►
So people like Jeff Altman, people like Bob Einstein,
00:20:49
◼
►
Super Dave, just all kinds of people.
00:20:52
◼
►
And then George Carlin's daughter was on.
00:20:54
◼
►
But it's a great insight into what you and I know,
00:20:58
◼
►
which is what an inscrutable person he was.
00:21:01
◼
►
everybody says the same thing.
00:21:02
◼
►
It was great, it was the greatest honor you ever had,
00:21:04
◼
►
but nobody, it was like two or three people
00:21:06
◼
►
who ever felt like they legitimately knew Johnny Carson.
00:21:09
◼
►
- Yeah, did you read the biography that is--
00:21:11
◼
►
- No, I saw that, we talked about that,
00:21:12
◼
►
I think one time we talked about that PBS show.
00:21:14
◼
►
- Oh, that was great, the PBS Masters episode.
00:21:17
◼
►
- That was terrific, yeah.
00:21:19
◼
►
- That was the best thing,
00:21:20
◼
►
and they didn't really try to get to the person.
00:21:24
◼
►
I mean, they acknowledged it,
00:21:25
◼
►
and they talked to so many people.
00:21:29
◼
►
was such a great thing the PBS master thing but it was kind of like almost
00:21:33
◼
►
like Citizen Kane where everybody like knew you know had the same regard for
00:21:37
◼
►
this purse but never really felt like they knew what made him tick you know
00:21:41
◼
►
and so anyway you might check out that podcast it's it's uh it's pretty good
00:21:45
◼
►
the book I forget is Henry something let me look it up here Carson biography
00:21:52
◼
►
Carson Henry let's see sounds like he'd you know he'd wrapped the show he Henry
00:21:59
◼
►
Okay, there we go
00:22:01
◼
►
And it's something he would never talk before the show there would be just a little bit right?
00:22:05
◼
►
It was just nobody he would not talk to the guests
00:22:07
◼
►
I mean he would get in the car and drive away and that was it. Yeah
00:22:09
◼
►
The the Henry Bush Kim book is uncomfortable to me because clearly it's a betrayal of
00:22:18
◼
►
Trust like there's no way he should be telling you store. I mean, it's unauthorized. Oh, yeah, definitely
00:22:25
◼
►
It's I mean, how could it be authorized? I mean Carson's dead
00:22:28
◼
►
But I mean, I don't think his family would have wanted it and I think if you had asked Johnny while he was alive
00:22:32
◼
►
Would you like Henry Bushkin to you know, write a book?
00:22:35
◼
►
Certainly not right, but on the other hand he did write it
00:22:38
◼
►
So I read it, you know, but I kind of felt I did I felt a little icky the whole time
00:22:42
◼
►
But there's some crazy stories in there. There's one story where I
00:22:45
◼
►
Forget if it was his wife or it was just a girlfriend
00:22:50
◼
►
But I think I might have been his wife and he Johnny thought is one of his you know
00:22:54
◼
►
Earlier wives this is when the show was still in New York and he lived in New York
00:22:56
◼
►
He figured out his wife was running around on him and he wanted to break into the
00:23:01
◼
►
Apartment it was her apartment, but he was paying for it. So he said it so it's got to be Lee
00:23:06
◼
►
I'm paying for it
00:23:07
◼
►
so it's legal we're breaking in and he got Henry but his took his lawyer with him and like two guys who could only really
00:23:14
◼
►
Be described as toughs
00:23:16
◼
►
thugs yeah and like and Henry Bushkin says in the book that the one guy even had a gun tucked in his belt and
00:23:23
◼
►
They go over there and like break into the place and find you know find evidence that she was running around on him and God
00:23:29
◼
►
But you know, it's like stories that you know, you don't expect your lawyer to write a book about that
00:23:33
◼
►
That's why you take your look. It's his lawyer that wrote the book. Yeah, it's his law. Oh my god
00:23:39
◼
►
That's that's not cricket man
00:23:43
◼
►
No, it's a good read. It's a good quick read, but it's
00:23:46
◼
►
Requesting from the library right now. Yeah, this is a guy, you know who needed some money, I think
00:23:54
◼
►
- But he was, you know, but I guess the thing
00:23:56
◼
►
that made me think about it is that he was obviously,
00:23:58
◼
►
he was more than just his lawyer though.
00:24:00
◼
►
He became as close a friend as anybody could to him.
00:24:03
◼
►
They played tennis together, they were both tennis nuts.
00:24:06
◼
►
And they used to travel to, I remember that Johnny did this
00:24:10
◼
►
'cause I remember I used to watch tennis on TV sometimes.
00:24:12
◼
►
But Johnny would always, like for years,
00:24:14
◼
►
had an annual trip where he would go to Wimbledon.
00:24:16
◼
►
And Henry Bushkin and his wife went with him.
00:24:18
◼
►
It was, you know, like Johnny and his wife
00:24:20
◼
►
Henry Bushkin and his wife every year for like 15 years they went to England
00:24:25
◼
►
for like two or three weeks so I mean they were definitely close but even then
00:24:29
◼
►
even being that close that you vacationed with Johnny Carson for a
00:24:33
◼
►
couple of weeks every year it's like he still clearly didn't really know him that
00:24:36
◼
►
well and it yeah totally I think Pat McCormick the comic Pat McCormick who I
00:24:39
◼
►
think it worked on the show and was on a lot also was another one but even in
00:24:44
◼
►
interviews I think Pat McCormick I think was on that podcast but it's a lot like
00:24:48
◼
►
when you hear people talk about Sinatra you know where they're all talking about
00:24:51
◼
►
mr. Sinatra and like this deference like he'll come back from the grave and get
00:24:54
◼
►
you whacked like this there's still a lot of deference to Johnny and a desire
00:24:59
◼
►
to keep his legacy you know clean to the extent possible yeah I almost feel I
00:25:03
◼
►
mean you know not having ever seen the guy in person but my impression is maybe
00:25:08
◼
►
that like he just had was like a one in a one in a billion freak where the real
00:25:14
◼
►
Johnny Carson was the one who was on for 60 minutes in front of a camera sitting
00:25:19
◼
►
at a desk like that really was him and that it was the other 23 hours of his
00:25:23
◼
►
life where there was it was just nothing oh yeah I mean he's like he's like a
00:25:27
◼
►
comic book character right I mean you know where it's almost like Bruce Wayne
00:25:31
◼
►
is the secret I you know what I mean it's like Batman is the real guy in some
00:25:35
◼
►
ways and breathing is yeah exactly right and I feel like that might have been
00:25:39
◼
►
Johnny Carson and I feel like you know that's what made him so inscrutable and
00:25:44
◼
►
and off you know off camera yeah let's take a break I'll take a break and I'm
00:25:49
◼
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really cool I'm really proud of that guy and envious and I kind of hate him a
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little bit our friend Matt Alexander yeah what he's what he's doing is
00:28:20
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amazing like what he's done in such a short period of time I think he's about
00:28:24
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14 years old and he's half English so he's gotten past that and it's
00:28:30
◼
►
still astonishing to me like what that guy has managed to do that you know when
00:28:35
◼
►
he first described these projects to me and it just seems like there's more and
00:28:38
◼
►
more coming out all the time you know I was like well that's you know it's kind
00:28:41
◼
►
of cool it kind of sounds like a store like a small store but it's been a big
00:28:47
◼
►
hit it's it's really frustrating yeah and you wish you could do something like
00:28:51
◼
►
I do because I feel like I don't know I like it because it's real I feel I the
00:28:59
◼
►
things that impressed me as people come up with new ideas for businesses and and
00:29:03
◼
►
you know I like the ones that have something that you can touch the way we
00:29:09
◼
►
gotta buy a by film for your virtual camera I think it drives you nuts though
00:29:15
◼
►
right like that's not really that's not really a company I would say I would to
00:29:20
◼
►
actually say that the spectrum of the things that I tend to be most interested
00:29:24
◼
►
in are on the one side are real physical things like somebody who's making iPhone
00:29:29
◼
►
docks out of blocks of wood right I mean not all of them I don't like them all
00:29:33
◼
►
but I mean you know something like that where you're making a real thing and
00:29:38
◼
►
you're doing it real way and then the ones I like least would have to be the
00:29:41
◼
►
virtual fake real-world constraints you know the some of the some of the kinds
00:29:47
◼
►
services that are out there are so weird as I get more and more cynical about
00:29:54
◼
►
everything and a little bit more frisky about things like privacy like I you
00:29:58
◼
►
just see stuff coming down the lane you're like really like that's there's
00:30:01
◼
►
this thing remember every block remember did you get that sure that was Stephen
00:30:06
◼
►
Johnson and Wilson I think Wilson minor worked on that but it was a really
00:30:09
◼
►
amazing service super clean beautiful website that would basically aggregate
00:30:14
◼
►
all kinds of mostly public information about things like police activity, safety,
00:30:19
◼
►
I mean anything that you you couldn't care less for any neighborhood except
00:30:23
◼
►
your own but in your neighborhood you really care and it's incredible like I
00:30:26
◼
►
went in and I saw one time I called the cops about something and I could find
00:30:29
◼
►
that on the website it was really really cool but I think they contracted to be
00:30:33
◼
►
in only a few contracted as in like kind of sucked down to be just in a few
00:30:37
◼
►
cities now these other ones cropping up my wife got me to get on this one in our
00:30:41
◼
►
neighborhood. It's just it's so annoying. It's one of those things where you you
00:30:46
◼
►
sign up and you got to like give them tons of information. They want your phone
00:30:50
◼
►
number. They want to send a postcard to your house to verify that you you're you
00:30:53
◼
►
fine and then they automatically put your address on the website and then
00:30:57
◼
►
every page you're on there are call to actions and pop-ups telling you to go
00:31:02
◼
►
invite more people. It asks you to like you know bring in all of your on the one
00:31:06
◼
►
hand they're real careful about making sure who you are but then it's one of
00:31:09
◼
►
those remember like path kind of thing where they're like now don't you want to
00:31:12
◼
►
install and bring in all of your contacts and your Facebook people and
00:31:14
◼
►
it's like I am increasingly super uncomfortable with that as a business
00:31:18
◼
►
model it's gross as soon as they asked me for it I had just closed the window I
00:31:23
◼
►
immediately think well that's your business model and then I'm grossed out
00:31:26
◼
►
yeah yeah and I mean there's some kinds of things like say what you will about
00:31:29
◼
►
Google I mean like opening that Google app especially like when I'm out of town
00:31:33
◼
►
I was out of town last week it still kind of blows my mind how smart Google
00:31:37
◼
►
is, I know they're Google, but if there's anybody out there who is providing some value
00:31:42
◼
►
for the nonsense they do, you gotta give them credit. Like, "Here's the city you're traveling
00:31:45
◼
►
to. There's the temperature. Hey, here's your flight that just came in via email." That
00:31:50
◼
►
kind of stuff, I wish they were better with the privacy stuff in some ways, but that's
00:31:55
◼
►
a real value. They've done something very innovative to be able to do that at scale.
00:31:59
◼
►
But you can just feel on some of these websites where you just tell that they're young, it's
00:32:02
◼
►
a new company and it's all about building the user base and then leveraging as much
00:32:08
◼
►
personal information as possible. I don't know, it's kind of a boring thing to get into,
00:32:11
◼
►
but I find that really kind of gross and frustrating. I feel like enough of my stuff is out there.
00:32:16
◼
►
I don't need to go sign up for free services that are going to do that.
00:32:22
◼
►
you see there was an article I forget the guy's name a couple weeks ago on on
00:32:33
◼
►
Google the the the trade-off between if you if you give Google everything they
00:32:39
◼
►
want to know about you and buy into their stuff you get a tremendous
00:32:44
◼
►
experience out of it like if you've got an Android phone and you use the whole
00:32:49
◼
►
ecosystem and the apps right that kind of thing right like you know and like
00:32:53
◼
►
you said like and it definitely works I mean I don't buy into this it's
00:32:57
◼
►
certainly come a long way right but it's cool stuff like if you're using Gmail
00:33:05
◼
►
and you let you know then then you get your flight stuff into your Gmail and
00:33:09
◼
►
then they already know you have a flight because they've already parsed the email
00:33:12
◼
►
from your airline that says you're doing it and then your today view already has
00:33:17
◼
►
like you said, has the weather for San Francisco
00:33:20
◼
►
because that's where I'm flying.
00:33:22
◼
►
Or like I just got a pop up yesterday,
00:33:23
◼
►
it's like this shirt that you ordered for,
00:33:25
◼
►
a short order for my kid, they're like,
00:33:27
◼
►
it just shipped, here's the FedEx number.
00:33:28
◼
►
Like that's actually pretty useful.
00:33:30
◼
►
- Yeah, that's pretty awesome.
00:33:32
◼
►
So I mean, but it's like you said though,
00:33:36
◼
►
like I'm a little wary of it,
00:33:41
◼
►
but at least with Google, the exchange is very clear.
00:33:46
◼
►
it's okay you're gonna give up some of your privacy
00:33:48
◼
►
and they're gonna send you targeted ads.
00:33:51
◼
►
And that makes me a little uncomfortable.
00:33:53
◼
►
But in exchange, there's a very clear value proposition
00:33:56
◼
►
though, it's we're gonna give you stuff
00:33:59
◼
►
that you need to know, like your weather
00:34:00
◼
►
and reminders of things that you didn't even ask
00:34:03
◼
►
to be reminded of but that you would need to.
00:34:06
◼
►
And I think that's pretty interesting.
00:34:07
◼
►
Whereas with a lot of these startups,
00:34:09
◼
►
it's like they want the information
00:34:11
◼
►
and you know they're gonna sell it out
00:34:13
◼
►
and it's like I have no idea,
00:34:14
◼
►
Why would I give this to you?
00:34:16
◼
►
- Right, right, right, right.
00:34:18
◼
►
Yeah, absolutely.
00:34:19
◼
►
And yeah, anyway, it's probably kind of a thistle
00:34:21
◼
►
to get into, but then you look at something like Uber,
00:34:24
◼
►
where did you see the thing where they're lost and found?
00:34:27
◼
►
Database was like an unprotected spreadsheet
00:34:29
◼
►
on the internet with people's names and phone numbers in it.
00:34:32
◼
►
- No, I did not.
00:34:34
◼
►
- It's like, wow, that's pretty rough.
00:34:36
◼
►
The sharing economy thing is super interesting to me
00:34:42
◼
►
because I'm kind of surprised,
00:34:44
◼
►
really, especially in San Francisco,
00:34:45
◼
►
I am very surprised this stuff has gotten as far as it has.
00:34:48
◼
►
You know, you asked me 10 years ago,
00:34:50
◼
►
I mean, I live in a neighborhood
00:34:50
◼
►
where it's very difficult to get a cab anytime.
00:34:53
◼
►
And I've cursed the cab companies forever
00:34:55
◼
►
'cause they don't give a fig, they don't need to.
00:34:57
◼
►
They can just drive up and down Polk Street
00:34:59
◼
►
and make all the money in the world, drive to the airport.
00:35:01
◼
►
There's, you know what I mean?
00:35:02
◼
►
That's how it works in a city.
00:35:04
◼
►
But I never would have guessed
00:35:06
◼
►
that they would get away with that here.
00:35:07
◼
►
You know what I mean?
00:35:08
◼
►
It's such a strong kind of union town in some ways.
00:35:10
◼
►
such a strong town for like people who are protected.
00:35:13
◼
►
Uh, you know, interest like with the medallions and stuff kind of amazed that stuff has gotten
00:35:18
◼
►
as far as it has.
00:35:20
◼
►
I didn't know.
00:35:21
◼
►
I didn't realize that.
00:35:22
◼
►
Um, I don't know if you saw my tweet.
00:35:24
◼
►
I don't know a week or two ago.
00:35:26
◼
►
Um, there was an article like like lift start just started here in Philly and the article
00:35:31
◼
►
about lift was about how the whole thing like all the uber all the ubers in Philly are illegal.
00:35:38
◼
►
There's they're not supposed to be operating in Philly.
00:35:40
◼
►
It's like news to me, I've been using Uber and Philly for like two years. I had no idea.
00:35:44
◼
►
Isn't that kind of mind-blowing? It just seems like one low-level government functionary could
00:35:49
◼
►
walk into that office and just shut off the lights. But like so they, I mean black cars are obviously
00:35:55
◼
►
legal but not based on you know not through the Uber interface. But they're regulated.
00:35:59
◼
►
I mean I guess I don't know what it is but there's something like and we have UberX now too so we
00:36:04
◼
►
have the you know the amateur cab driver version. You meet some very interesting people with UberX.
00:36:10
◼
►
And the whole thing was about how Lyft, you know, Lyft's got the pink mustaches on the cars,
00:36:15
◼
►
which makes them so easy to identify. So, like, because they're illegal, like the...
00:36:20
◼
►
But it's not enforced by the police. It's enforced by the parking authority.
00:36:24
◼
►
The long arm of the parking authority.
00:36:28
◼
►
But I've heard stories, I don't know if these are true, but I've heard anecdotes where people
00:36:31
◼
►
are like, "Okay, fist bump. Get in. Now put your bag in the trunk. We're friends. We've
00:36:35
◼
►
We've known each other since college.
00:36:38
◼
►
Because the Lyft experience is still a little on the bubble.
00:36:44
◼
►
Yeah, I'm not comfortable with it, really.
00:36:48
◼
►
Yeah, I'm not either.
00:36:49
◼
►
But out here, there's an article in the paper a week or two ago
00:36:56
◼
►
I mean, I find this totally plausible.
00:36:58
◼
►
Uber drivers are making something like, on average,
00:37:00
◼
►
$10 an hour more than taxi drivers.
00:37:03
◼
►
there's been a utter diaspora of people leaving
00:37:07
◼
►
these taxi companies to go work for Uber,
00:37:09
◼
►
'cause there's just smart deal in it.
00:37:11
◼
►
- Yeah, I've done that, and when I first started using Uber,
00:37:14
◼
►
it was in San Francisco, because it was early days
00:37:17
◼
►
when Uber was new, and I don't know where the,
00:37:19
◼
►
maybe that was the only place
00:37:20
◼
►
where they were operating at first,
00:37:21
◼
►
but I remember thinking, well, this sounds weird, right?
00:37:25
◼
►
This sounds weird, but I'll try it,
00:37:27
◼
►
and I remember the first couple of times I got in an Uber,
00:37:29
◼
►
I would ask the driver, I was like,
00:37:31
◼
►
so how do you like this, do you like this?
00:37:33
◼
►
And two of never, never was the answer anything other than I love it. This is you know, this is great
00:37:38
◼
►
Oh, absolutely. And whereas if I get a cab ride, I've said this story elsewhere, but I recent last month
00:37:44
◼
►
I got a cab ride home from a gig and
00:37:46
◼
►
The entire time the guy had his right arm on the seat turning around facing me the entire trip screaming
00:37:52
◼
►
He's like an uber anti uber activist, but the entire ride like I'm you know
00:37:57
◼
►
three sheets to the wind and just trying to put my headphones on and nod and he really wants to talk about uber and and
00:38:02
◼
►
And it's the battle lines have been drawn.
00:38:05
◼
►
I tried using that app, but you know, curb, do you have that there?
00:38:08
◼
►
No, I don't think we do.
00:38:09
◼
►
There's an app, at least in San Francisco, that is the go-to app for ordering a cab in
00:38:15
◼
►
an Uber-like way.
00:38:16
◼
►
I've tried it three times and waiting 10 minutes, I've never even gotten a response that a cab
00:38:22
◼
►
would even be available.
00:38:23
◼
►
But just because I live out in kind of a crazy part of town.
00:38:26
◼
►
So I mean, it's, I don't love using it either and they kind of seem like dicks.
00:38:30
◼
►
I mean, no offense to Uber,
00:38:33
◼
►
but there's some pretty crazy decisions going on.
00:38:37
◼
►
- Yeah, I'll send you a link.
00:38:37
◼
►
Here's what we've got.
00:38:39
◼
►
This is our new thing is 215, get a cab.
00:38:43
◼
►
- And it's clearly like,
00:38:46
◼
►
like the various cab companies have colluded to get,
00:38:52
◼
►
I mean, I'm not colluded in any legal way,
00:38:54
◼
►
but it's not just one. - Collaborated.
00:38:55
◼
►
- Yeah, it's in response to Uber.
00:39:00
◼
►
- It's just no doubt about it.
00:39:01
◼
►
It is in response to Uber
00:39:03
◼
►
and they've got it plastered all over all of their--
00:39:07
◼
►
- All of their vehicles, two and five.
00:39:11
◼
►
- Remember that time and--
00:39:12
◼
►
- So I feel like the thing that's funny to me though
00:39:13
◼
►
is they want you to get the app, right?
00:39:15
◼
►
- Yep. - Get the app.
00:39:16
◼
►
And the app sees-- - Have the app,
00:39:17
◼
►
have the app before it occurs to you that you need a cab
00:39:20
◼
►
because you're drunk in an alley somewhere,
00:39:22
◼
►
like what are you gonna do, download an app?
00:39:24
◼
►
Like you need to have it on your phone already probably.
00:39:26
◼
►
- And it's a new thing,
00:39:27
◼
►
but they've come up with the name is a phone number.
00:39:29
◼
►
Like it's still the 80s and you've got to go over, you know, does anybody have a quarter?
00:39:34
◼
►
Give me a quarter, I got a call to get a cab.
00:39:36
◼
►
- Right, you can just imagine the meeting where like,
00:39:38
◼
►
all right, we'll do the app,
00:39:40
◼
►
but it's gotta be the phone number.
00:39:42
◼
►
- Right, and so their website is 215getacab.com.
00:39:47
◼
►
- For some reason I'm reminded of,
00:39:50
◼
►
I wanna say like in the early 2000s,
00:39:52
◼
►
when, you know, the dotcoms had already started,
00:39:54
◼
►
the dotcom like retail.coms, thepets.com and all,
00:39:57
◼
►
it was clearly like things were a little rocky,
00:39:58
◼
►
But there are more and more places that wanted to look like
00:40:01
◼
►
an e-business.
00:40:02
◼
►
And I think a lot of them were basically just like a CGI
00:40:05
◼
►
or a Perl script that sends something to a fax machine.
00:40:08
◼
►
You go in and you fill out a form.
00:40:10
◼
►
You do not have any sense that anything electronic
00:40:12
◼
►
was happening at all.
00:40:13
◼
►
You know what I mean?
00:40:14
◼
►
Not like today where you can like track things
00:40:15
◼
►
and stuff like that.
00:40:16
◼
►
I think it used to be pretty Rube Goldberg
00:40:18
◼
►
to start a company like that.
00:40:19
◼
►
- Right, yeah, I like the idea though that,
00:40:21
◼
►
I think it was probably was true though
00:40:23
◼
►
that a lot of places where you could order online,
00:40:25
◼
►
it would generate a fax.
00:40:26
◼
►
- Oh, that's how it works now.
00:40:28
◼
►
If you order a lot of food online, all it does is print something out.
00:40:30
◼
►
I mean, obviously, that's the installed base.
00:40:34
◼
►
It just prints something out next to the cash register.
00:40:37
◼
►
I don't know, man.
00:40:39
◼
►
Should we talk about vaccines?
00:40:44
◼
►
Oh, come on!
00:40:51
◼
►
Well if we end up, I was telling a friend of mine what our nominal topic for today was,
00:40:56
◼
►
which I'm very excited about.
00:40:57
◼
►
And my friend responded by saying,
00:40:59
◼
►
you are gonna get so much email.
00:41:02
◼
►
- Oh, we probably are.
00:41:02
◼
►
- So we might as well jam it all into one episode.
00:41:05
◼
►
Yeah, vaccines.
00:41:07
◼
►
- So the thing that got me about the vaccines
00:41:09
◼
►
with it being back in the news again
00:41:12
◼
►
is like, it's everywhere now, right?
00:41:16
◼
►
It's percolated up to like the national consciousness
00:41:20
◼
►
and it's on the news every day now and all that stuff.
00:41:22
◼
►
And I was like, why?
00:41:23
◼
►
Why all of a sudden?
00:41:24
◼
►
I mean, this is not a new thing.
00:41:25
◼
►
I mean, this is only a story if there's a controversy, right? That's that's the thing. I couldn't just go these people are dumbasses
00:41:31
◼
►
I will have to say well, there's still a couple scientists that haven't definitely decided on this
00:41:36
◼
►
It's and I realized it's obvious. It's all because actual people got actual measles at Disneyland and
00:41:43
◼
►
I didn't really put I saw this story and I thought well
00:41:48
◼
►
They are did because there's a bunch of dopes who aren't getting there's so many people
00:41:52
◼
►
Who aren't getting their kids immunized? Of course, there's an outbreak of I wasn't I was so unsurprised right that there was an outbreak of measles
00:41:58
◼
►
It's Disneyland that I it seems like a perfect place for there to be a measles outbreak given the conditions
00:42:04
◼
►
I I couldn't believe that it was news, you know
00:42:07
◼
►
Whereas it's clearly is like the eye-opener for a lot of people like oh my god
00:42:12
◼
►
You know if you don't get your kid in it just seems like that's a big part of the conversation is
00:42:16
◼
►
Holy shit, if millions of people don't immunize their kids these kids can get measles
00:42:20
◼
►
like that seems to be our national conversation yeah it's really
00:42:27
◼
►
frustrating it's yeah I don't know what to say I also saw I saw an interesting
00:42:34
◼
►
poll on on by by age whether you support mandatory immunization and it drops off
00:42:41
◼
►
so precipitously it's like 70 year olds it's like almost universal support 60
00:42:45
◼
►
year olds very high 50 40 kind of high and then when you well like once you
00:42:49
◼
►
get in her 40s and 30s it's lower and then you talk to kids in their 20s and
00:42:53
◼
►
it's like they you know it's like 15% support mandatory that doesn't mean that
00:42:58
◼
►
they don't think people should do it they're just saying it shouldn't be
00:43:00
◼
►
mandatory but I think that the reason that it's age it's like it's like
00:43:04
◼
►
reading to your kid that's one of the things it's a good idea but yeah I don't
00:43:07
◼
►
really technically have to do that that's the idea like yeah you don't have
00:43:10
◼
►
to do that I don't have to give my kid a measles shot well the reason it's age
00:43:13
◼
►
specific though is so obvious it's because older people remember what it's
00:43:17
◼
►
like when your neighbor had polio right are they remember parents age who made
00:43:21
◼
►
it through the depression and watched a neighbor on one side of them lose three
00:43:26
◼
►
kids right or a sibling even right I mean we said my grandmother lost a
00:43:31
◼
►
sibling - it flew in the I think you know right right around World War one
00:43:36
◼
►
right so they've saw and then all of a sudden big scientists come out with just
00:43:42
◼
►
a shot that makes your arms sore for a day and then you'll never get polio of
00:43:47
◼
►
of course they support it. Yeah I don't know I'm trying so hard to grow as a
00:43:53
◼
►
person John I'm trying really hard to be sympathetic and understand everybody's
00:43:58
◼
►
position but it it's one of the things I think we talked years ago about the
00:44:03
◼
►
thing remember the you told me this remember that there was that poll that
00:44:05
◼
►
something was what was the percentage of people who were thoroughly convinced
00:44:09
◼
►
that Obama is not eligible to be president even late late late in that
00:44:15
◼
►
in that rumor, it was still like 40% or something ridiculous of people. And it's like there's the
00:44:21
◼
►
thing is there's a you know there's there's a I've been reading this book that I'll apparently
00:44:29
◼
►
mention on every podcast called the wisdom of insecurity by Alan Watts and he makes a
00:44:33
◼
►
distinction in that book that really hit me. It makes a distinction between faith and belief,
00:44:36
◼
►
which I found very persuasive with the idea that you know faith is a thing that we all have. Yeah
00:44:42
◼
►
or sight unseen things that we, there's some part of us that has faith that these kinds of things
00:44:48
◼
►
could happen, that there might be a heaven or whatever. Which is really different from belief,
00:44:51
◼
►
because belief is a kind of a more dangerous thing. Because belief is where, you know,
00:44:55
◼
►
there's not really that much to even discuss. Like, I've decided that this is how things are,
00:45:01
◼
►
and nothing is going to talk me out of this because now it's become part of who I am.
00:45:04
◼
►
Now I am a person who believes this about vaccines, or believes this about Obama.
00:45:08
◼
►
And, you know, I think that can become very internalized. You and I probably have things
00:45:12
◼
►
like that that we're not even aware of but you know that's the dangerous part
00:45:15
◼
►
and there's no what we dumb liberals don't understand is there's no way there
00:45:20
◼
►
are never gonna be enough infographics Venn diagrams or horrifying maps to
00:45:24
◼
►
convince people of anything different I mean Jesus Christ we had George W Bush
00:45:28
◼
►
in the White House for eight years people will believe anything well one of
00:45:32
◼
►
the things that's interesting about the I think the whole immunization thing is
00:45:36
◼
►
very sad and for anybody who's listening I do have enough listeners I'm sure that
00:45:39
◼
►
there's got to be some of you who should stick to computers. Yeah, stick to computers who have
00:45:44
◼
►
children who've chosen not to immunize. I do. I think one of the things that's I so I wanted to
00:45:50
◼
►
I want to be a big person. I want to be as I don't want to be insulting, but I think one of the
00:45:56
◼
►
things that's fascinating about it is that it has no traditional political divide. It's not a liberal
00:46:01
◼
►
thing or a Republican thing or a conservative thing or a rural thing. It's like all over the map.
00:46:08
◼
►
it's you know it's like when they poll i saw one poll that was like exactly 50 50 where like
00:46:12
◼
►
they talked to i don't know however poll sample size number of parents who chose not to immunize
00:46:19
◼
►
their children and who did you vote for in the last election and it was like 50 50 split really
00:46:24
◼
►
yeah i had no do you think the reasons why they differ are different would they agree on the
00:46:30
◼
►
reason why they decide not to do that i you know i don't know but i remember one of the big reasons
00:46:37
◼
►
that it really caught on was I remember reading the article it was Robert F
00:46:42
◼
►
Kennedy jr. wrote like a feature magazine length article I don't know if
00:46:45
◼
►
it was for the Atlantic or one of those magazines like that you know back when
00:46:52
◼
►
there was that one ingredient in the I mean you know that they were yeah I
00:46:56
◼
►
thought we worried we worried about that I'll be honest with you yeah well Jonas
00:47:00
◼
►
was around that age I mean it was at the height of it it was I think when Jonas
00:47:04
◼
►
was he just turned 11 so I think when Jonas was getting that's like his first
00:47:09
◼
►
year immunizations was before I think it was before that one paper in Britain had
00:47:17
◼
►
been debunked oh the Lancet article right I think it was before it was
00:47:21
◼
►
debunked so it was definitely you know it was a thing I don't know we were a
00:47:25
◼
►
little you know I I didn't really put creeds into it but I you know I was it
00:47:30
◼
►
I just remember it being a thing. We talked about it.
00:47:33
◼
►
We ask a lot of questions, for sure. And they were very sober about it and actually
00:47:39
◼
►
like oddly patient, like you have to be with a new parent. Because we pretty much knew we were just
00:47:43
◼
►
going to have the one kid. It's like we don't get a lot of shots at this, so to speak. And we,
00:47:48
◼
►
it was important to us to know that kind of stuff. I don't feel dumb for asking those questions
00:47:53
◼
►
because they were very, the doctor was very straightforward about it. It's the same thing that
00:48:00
◼
►
a lot of sensible people understand, which is like there's risks to everything in life,
00:48:03
◼
►
but what we can tell you is the risks associated with vaccination are nothing compared with the
00:48:10
◼
►
very demonstrable risks of not vaccinating. Yeah, as an individual, I think in terms of risk
00:48:15
◼
►
analysis or cost benefit, it's not even a comparison. Right, and then I, you know,
00:48:21
◼
►
especially when it comes to your kid, I think it's almost human instinct, at least in our modern
00:48:26
◼
►
world where we're very as parents we're very selfish about our children that we
00:48:31
◼
►
want will do anything for our kids and you know if you could prove that your
00:48:37
◼
►
kid might be better off without as an individual would be better off without
00:48:41
◼
►
immunizations versus the whole civic responsibility the herd you know the
00:48:46
◼
►
herd meant the herd advantage of getting everybody immunized I can see it and I
00:48:52
◼
►
think that's the basic thinking that's going on behind the people who chose not
00:48:55
◼
►
to immunize their children that they're they value you know that they believe
00:48:59
◼
►
some kind of bad thing can happen from the immunization right and regardless of
00:49:03
◼
►
what it means but that's a sticky idea that's a very durable idea whether or
00:49:07
◼
►
not it's true or accurate I can certainly understand why it's something
00:49:11
◼
►
that that I mean I don't agree with it but I get why that's something that
00:49:15
◼
►
people feel is a big risk you know but think about this I mean this is
00:49:19
◼
►
something where I think we all have a I feel like I have a lot in common with
00:49:23
◼
►
other people which is you know I've grown so I'm skeptical so cynical about
00:49:28
◼
►
all the turns out announcements about what's dangerous and you know there's
00:49:32
◼
►
been numerous you know articles over the years talking about the crazy history of
00:49:36
◼
►
stuff like the the food pyramid right the USDA's food pyramid you're not USDA
00:49:41
◼
►
so what it is what's the one that puts out the food pyramid like in the 70s
00:49:44
◼
►
we'd like make sure you have tons and tons of bread and you know what I mean
00:49:47
◼
►
and then it was so USDA you I but it was very much apparently very much formed by
00:49:53
◼
►
these different industries not to be like a nut or something but your body
00:49:57
◼
►
was never meant to handle this much corn my god no one's supposed to jam this
00:50:01
◼
►
much corn into their hole it's nuts and then what happens to be old fats the
00:50:05
◼
►
enemy okay so quit eating eggs all right so now fast the enemy so let's have
00:50:09
◼
►
snack wells so everyone sits around and eats fat-free brownies with three cups
00:50:12
◼
►
of sugar in it oh wait a minute no it turns out sugar is actually the enemy
00:50:15
◼
►
and so forth look no further back than in the last decade look at fucking water
00:50:19
◼
►
bottles. Do you follow this at all? No. Like what used to be you're like oh you're
00:50:24
◼
►
killing the environment with all these cups so for God's sakes go out and buy a
00:50:27
◼
►
Nalgene bottle and you had to have a Nalgene bottle. Where's your Nalgene
00:50:30
◼
►
bottle? Those stupid plastic bottles. Oh no guess what? Turns out phthalates. Oh my
00:50:35
◼
►
gosh you're gonna die because you're doing the right thing. So now you should
00:50:38
◼
►
go and buy this kind of and now people are saying maybe those aluminum ones
00:50:41
◼
►
that we used to replace the Nalgene bottles are bad. You know what the trouble
00:50:44
◼
►
is it doesn't it kind of doesn't matter what is actually true accurate accurate
00:50:48
◼
►
or known. What matters is we are scared to hurt ourselves and our kids and we're always going to
00:50:53
◼
►
try and have the most recent information that we can find about what we should do about it.
00:50:57
◼
►
I mean you're not even supposed to put plastic in the microwave anymore. Like what do you put
00:51:01
◼
►
in the microwave? You know like throw the goddamn thing out if you can't put plastic in it. It's
00:51:05
◼
►
useless. Who doesn't? I'm not going to make a bowl to warm something up. I'm not a fucking monster.
00:51:10
◼
►
I remember coaching Little League a couple years ago. I am familiar with the whole water bottle
00:51:17
◼
►
thing now and it had something to do with I think it was phthalates and I don't know.
00:51:21
◼
►
I know baby remember baby bottles and phthalates.
00:51:23
◼
►
I it's like it made me feel like time traveling dad from the 1950s you know like I'm just trying
00:51:31
◼
►
to make sure none of these kids get hit in the mouth with a baseball right number one I don't
00:51:37
◼
►
want anybody getting hit in the head with a baseball it's a constant fear you've got 12 kids
00:51:42
◼
►
and at some point at least two of the 12 invariably are not paying attention to the game
00:51:47
◼
►
and therefore are at risk of getting hit in the head with a baseball, which is bad.
00:51:51
◼
►
So it's, you know, every game...
00:51:52
◼
►
We can all agree on that.
00:51:54
◼
►
Every game is two hours of non-stop. 95% of my attention is don't let any of these kids get
00:51:59
◼
►
hit by a baseball. And then 5% of my attention is let's, you know, try to score some runs and
00:52:04
◼
►
get some outs and maybe win the game. And in the meantime, there's this whole thing with the other,
00:52:08
◼
►
all the other, I mean, not just moms either. It's moms and dads, and they're all talking about like,
00:52:12
◼
►
"Oh, you got to get rid of that bottle. That bottle, you can't drink out of that."
00:52:15
◼
►
Everybody's an expert.
00:52:17
◼
►
And I'm just like, just give the kids some goddamn water.
00:52:20
◼
►
I don't know.
00:52:20
◼
►
When I was a kid, we'd finish each game
00:52:23
◼
►
with 50 of those little--
00:52:26
◼
►
Conical juice boxes.
00:52:27
◼
►
Oh, sure, the water cups.
00:52:30
◼
►
The conical paper cups.
00:52:31
◼
►
You just leave them on the field.
00:52:32
◼
►
Let the Indian clean them up.
00:52:35
◼
►
You didn't even have to clean them up.
00:52:37
◼
►
Yeah, totally.
00:52:39
◼
►
And I mean, it is funny, given how you and I already
00:52:42
◼
►
come from a pampered generation in so many ways.
00:52:46
◼
►
We're probably the last generation that has a chance of doing better than our parents in life.
00:52:50
◼
►
But, um, for a while anyway.
00:52:52
◼
►
But, you know, I mentioned this a lot, but like some of my, I'm not, okay guys, I'm not advocating for this,
00:52:58
◼
►
but I have such, I wrote a thing about this one time.
00:53:00
◼
►
Just having this memory of our old green Pontiac, my dad driving around, smoking a butt with the windows down,
00:53:08
◼
►
and me like standing on the seat, like, or you could just stick your head out the window.
00:53:12
◼
►
You would just do all this crazy stuff.
00:53:13
◼
►
Seatbelts? You've got to be kidding me.
00:53:14
◼
►
Do we even have seatbelts?
00:53:15
◼
►
And now today my daughter doesn't do anything without a helmet.
00:53:18
◼
►
I mean, that's on me.
00:53:20
◼
►
I want to protect her head.
00:53:21
◼
►
But it is pretty wild how many people manage to survive that.
00:53:26
◼
►
Now at the same time, I was trying to explain to the best of my amateur ability
00:53:31
◼
►
what the world population is and how it works.
00:53:34
◼
►
I was saying to my kid, OK, I think there's like what?
00:53:36
◼
►
Coming up on 7 billion people, something like that.
00:53:38
◼
►
I was like, can you guess why that keeps going up?
00:53:41
◼
►
And my hints were, well, one of them is when mommies and daddies get together,
00:53:44
◼
►
what happens?" She goes, "Well, they have babies." I'm like, "Yeah, and when those babies grow up,
00:53:48
◼
►
and they become mommies and daddies, what happens?" And they have like three kids. And she's like,
00:53:51
◼
►
"Oh, I have seven more kids." And I was like, "But the other thing is, to our credit, I think,
00:53:56
◼
►
people die of less completely preventable random shit than when I was a kid." I've got to stipulate,
00:54:04
◼
►
thank God, for seat belts. They've made the road safer, the cars are safer, it's all safer.
00:54:08
◼
►
Everybody knew somebody that had died in a car accident when I was a kid. It was just a thing.
00:54:13
◼
►
It was cancer and car accidents killed and lung disease like killed everybody when I was a kid and they're all at least partially preventable
00:54:20
◼
►
Right a huge to a huge swath of car accidents are preventable. Well in addition to seat belts. There's the whole
00:54:26
◼
►
Have you seen the footage you had to that the difference in the crumple zones of like an old car in a new car?
00:54:32
◼
►
It's it's almost farcical
00:54:35
◼
►
Yeah, oh man those drivers ed movies. I still think about them. I've never unbuckled a dead man
00:54:40
◼
►
My mom took our Pontiac to the dealership. She took it to a mechanic and said, "Look,
00:54:48
◼
►
we bought this $8,000 car and it beeps when we sit in it if we don't put on the seat belt.
00:54:53
◼
►
Can you turn that off?" And he said, "Yes, I will turn that off for you."
00:54:56
◼
►
Or you just leave it fastened all the time.
00:55:01
◼
►
My sister and I were not allowed to use the seat belts because we would mess them up.
00:55:05
◼
►
Like, you know what I mean? Like they wouldn't retract right anymore or that, you know,
00:55:11
◼
►
you get them twisted around.
00:55:12
◼
►
It used to be pretty basic the way that it would retract. You could like get it off the runner,
00:55:17
◼
►
like off the spool and it wouldn't go back in right.
00:55:19
◼
►
Right. So at some point one of us had gotten one of the ones in the backseat twisted in the,
00:55:25
◼
►
you know, the actual belt was twisted in the, what would you call it?
00:55:29
◼
►
That little cartridge kind of thing.
00:55:30
◼
►
Yeah, the cartridge that would slide to make it adjustable.
00:55:32
◼
►
- I know exactly what you mean.
00:55:33
◼
►
They were really primitive.
00:55:35
◼
►
They didn't snap into place very well.
00:55:36
◼
►
And it was very easy when feeding it back.
00:55:38
◼
►
It would be like a roller blind,
00:55:42
◼
►
getting slightly off track at the beginning
00:55:43
◼
►
and then being way off track by the time it got to the end.
00:55:45
◼
►
- It's a lot, the only thing that's similar to it anymore
00:55:47
◼
►
are airplane seat belts.
00:55:49
◼
►
But it was a lot,
00:55:50
◼
►
the buckling connection was a lot more primitive.
00:55:52
◼
►
But the way that you could slide it on the belt,
00:55:54
◼
►
well, we'd gotten it twisted up
00:55:56
◼
►
and it took my mom a long time to unfix it.
00:55:58
◼
►
And so from then on, we weren't allowed to use seat belts.
00:56:02
◼
►
just let them go.
00:56:03
◼
►
It took her 15 minutes to get them untangled.
00:56:08
◼
►
So then that was it, no more seat belts.
00:56:10
◼
►
- What do you think is gonna happen with the vaccine stuff?
00:56:13
◼
►
Do you think it'll take a generation?
00:56:15
◼
►
Or does it take event generation
00:56:17
◼
►
or does it take a measles 9/11?
00:56:19
◼
►
Like what do you think will change and how
00:56:22
◼
►
in the next however many end years?
00:56:24
◼
►
- I've been thinking about, I don't think,
00:56:26
◼
►
I don't think there's any way to go back on it.
00:56:27
◼
►
And part of it is what we were saying a couple of minutes ago
00:56:31
◼
►
where you can't, you can come at them,
00:56:33
◼
►
like they've done studies that you go at them
00:56:35
◼
►
with the most factual, statistical approach
00:56:38
◼
►
of the relative safety of immunizations
00:56:41
◼
►
and the fact that, you know, how horrible it is,
00:56:45
◼
►
you know, measles can make you blind, kill people.
00:56:49
◼
►
I think they said, I think just 46 people a day
00:56:53
◼
►
die from measles around the world.
00:56:55
◼
►
Something like that, around the world.
00:56:57
◼
►
And you give them these facts,
00:57:00
◼
►
and the people who don't want to vaccinate their kids
00:57:02
◼
►
get the facts and they come out of it more convinced.
00:57:05
◼
►
- I heard this, I did hear that.
00:57:07
◼
►
But you know, facts are slippery things.
00:57:09
◼
►
And I mean, if somebody that you didn't trust,
00:57:11
◼
►
let's be honest, if somebody you didn't trust
00:57:13
◼
►
that you considered to be a mouthpiece for an organization,
00:57:17
◼
►
some kind of like the Laramie cigarettes guys
00:57:19
◼
►
on The Simpsons, if somebody came to you
00:57:21
◼
►
with some information and you knew
00:57:23
◼
►
that they were compromised,
00:57:25
◼
►
even if they gave you what they presented as facts,
00:57:27
◼
►
you wouldn't listen to them.
00:57:29
◼
►
or you probably wouldn't go look
00:57:30
◼
►
at the primary research, right?
00:57:31
◼
►
I'm the same way, I know what I believe,
00:57:34
◼
►
I know what I think is BS.
00:57:36
◼
►
It's just that, right back to that,
00:57:37
◼
►
I think we've talked about this every time,
00:57:38
◼
►
that Lakoff book, "Don't Think of an Elephant."
00:57:40
◼
►
If you have a certain mental model for how reality works
00:57:44
◼
►
and what relationships are
00:57:45
◼
►
and how you determine what's real
00:57:47
◼
►
and that overrides or supersedes new information
00:57:51
◼
►
by an order of magnitude, right?
00:57:52
◼
►
I mean, it's gotta, I mean,
00:57:54
◼
►
the way that you have conducted yourself in the world
00:57:56
◼
►
for however many end 30 some years whatever is likely to have such
00:58:01
◼
►
I totally buy that you know and what your family believes
00:58:04
◼
►
and what the people around you believe what the people your church believe it's
00:58:07
◼
►
constantly being reinforced because that's part of your tribe that's
00:58:10
◼
►
what your tribe believes and there's no reason not to i mean we've all got
00:58:13
◼
►
tribal things like that right yeah like you like the stupid you like the
00:58:16
◼
►
dallas cowboys you've got problems of your own
00:58:19
◼
►
that's part of the problem though is that there's there is a sort of tribal
00:58:22
◼
►
behavior where the the kids who are not immunized tend to be clustered because it spreads and you
00:58:30
◼
►
become friends you know i mean we're not like super buddy buddy with any of the other parents
00:58:33
◼
►
at school but you talk to them and you know and it's like it becomes like a thing where like now
00:58:39
◼
►
like i forget what the the percentage is in marin county but it's just ridiculous marin's got a lot
00:58:44
◼
►
of weird outliers marin also has a used to have as far as i know like a improbably high rate of
00:58:50
◼
►
breast cancer. And I imagine there's ways that you could come up with why that is that don't involve,
00:58:56
◼
►
you know, high power lines or something. It could be that they're getting detection better or
00:58:59
◼
►
something. I don't know. But yeah, Marin's a thing. I remember Scott Simpson said something
00:59:07
◼
►
made me laugh a long time ago when he had a kid and I didn't at the time have a kid. I think it
00:59:10
◼
►
was a toot he had back in the Fevard days. He said something like there's two kinds of parents.
00:59:18
◼
►
Like there's the helicopter parents that are more protective than me and I hate them.
00:59:23
◼
►
And then there's the parents who are totally careless with their kids and I hate them too.
00:59:26
◼
►
The way you evaluate everything is based on what you think. Everybody else is either too permissive
00:59:32
◼
►
or too strict.
00:59:33
◼
►
>> It's so totally true.
00:59:34
◼
►
>> It's true, they're just a bunch of assholes.
00:59:37
◼
►
Their kid's an asshole, he doesn't even know how to tie his shoes.
00:59:42
◼
►
And then there's the other kid who's reckless.
00:59:44
◼
►
>> Look at that guy.
00:59:45
◼
►
>> What's wrong with these parents? They're maniacs, their kid's a menace.
00:59:47
◼
►
Geez, come on kid, it's a jungle gym, let the kid play. Oh my God, I can't believe you let him get
00:59:52
◼
►
on the jungle gym. Or even with what we want to talk about later, like with movies, like I cannot
01:00:02
◼
►
believe they let their kid watch that. Or I can't believe that they don't want us to let him watch
01:00:06
◼
►
Harry Potter. Oh, this is what makes it. I texted you about this this morning. I know we're not
01:00:12
◼
►
getting into it just now, but the way I tried to phrase this to my daughter, and we'll come back to
01:00:16
◼
►
this was like, you know, it's not just a matter of like, you know me, I like a facet. I like,
01:00:21
◼
►
as they say in academics, I like problematizing. I like taking something that seems obvious and
01:00:24
◼
►
figuring out how it's actually a mess. And so like with kids in media, it's not just like,
01:00:29
◼
►
what do you show your kids? It's like, hmm, it's like, well, what kinds of stuff do you
01:00:33
◼
►
show your particular kid at what point in their life, in what context, et cetera, et cetera, et
01:00:40
◼
►
cetera, because we all know every kid's really different. I mean, anybody with two kids,
01:00:44
◼
►
There's a kind of people who say,
01:00:45
◼
►
Google's this kind of company,
01:00:46
◼
►
Apple's this kind of company.
01:00:48
◼
►
If you said to them, your three kids are identical,
01:00:50
◼
►
they'd hit you in the face.
01:00:52
◼
►
'Cause all their kids are special flowers.
01:00:54
◼
►
So I know we'll come back to that,
01:00:55
◼
►
but oh, we're gonna get so much email.
01:00:57
◼
►
- We're gonna get a lot of email.
01:00:58
◼
►
Let me take a break.
01:00:59
◼
►
Let's take a break and thank another one of our sponsors,
01:01:03
◼
►
good friends at Harry's.
01:01:05
◼
►
Now you guys know Harry's.
01:01:06
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They're the people who make top-notch men's shaving stuff.
01:01:12
◼
►
They've got razors, they've got razor handles,
01:01:15
◼
►
they've got product, like shaving cream, shaving gel,
01:01:19
◼
►
aftershave, that kind of stuff.
01:01:21
◼
►
And the basic gist behind their story is
01:01:26
◼
►
that they looked at the market for razors and shaving stuff
01:01:30
◼
►
and saw that it was a mess.
01:01:32
◼
►
It's stuff that's ugly, it's stuff that's overpriced,
01:01:35
◼
►
it's stuff that's a pain in the ass to buy because--
01:01:37
◼
►
- You gotta go hit a button and ask somebody
01:01:39
◼
►
to come over with a key to let you please,
01:01:41
◼
►
if I could, could I please have some razor blades?
01:01:44
◼
►
- It's like when you remember when the compact disc stores
01:01:47
◼
►
used to lock the CD.
01:01:49
◼
►
You know what I love?
01:01:50
◼
►
I go to my Walgreens seven times a day
01:01:52
◼
►
and when I go there to buy some goddamn razor blades,
01:01:54
◼
►
and I am a Harry's user now, to be honest,
01:01:56
◼
►
but when I go in there to get like,
01:01:57
◼
►
if I'm traveling and I wanna bring
01:01:59
◼
►
this particular razor with me,
01:02:00
◼
►
I go there and it's the same dingus kid
01:02:03
◼
►
that I see seven times a day and I say,
01:02:05
◼
►
"Oh, could I please have the,
01:02:06
◼
►
"this and such, $75 worth of blades please?"
01:02:09
◼
►
He's like, "Are you ready to check out now?"
01:02:10
◼
►
I'm like, no, I wanna walk around the store
01:02:12
◼
►
and steal stuff for a while.
01:02:13
◼
►
No, he's got to walk me.
01:02:16
◼
►
- The assistant manager wants to walk me to the counter
01:02:19
◼
►
so that I don't steal his precious Gillette's.
01:02:22
◼
►
Oh, it's the worst.
01:02:24
◼
►
- I, one time I had to, I was at your neck of the woods.
01:02:28
◼
►
I was in San Francisco for one of these Apple events
01:02:30
◼
►
or something like that, and oh, I forgot my toothbrush.
01:02:33
◼
►
Well, that's the sort of thing, I cannot,
01:02:37
◼
►
I think not brushing your teeth for two or three days.
01:02:40
◼
►
your mouth would feel horrible. You gotta take care of it. I guess I probably should have just
01:02:43
◼
►
called down the front desk at the hotel and seen if they could do it. But I thought, well,
01:02:46
◼
►
I gotta go out anyway. And I went on right there on Market Street to, I don't know, what is it?
01:02:50
◼
►
Is it a, yeah, like a CVS or Walgreens? Yeah, I forget what they get, you know, but I go in there
01:02:55
◼
►
and the goddamn toothbrushes were locked behind those. What? Yeah. Because I guess people steal
01:03:00
◼
►
toothbrushes. I ran out of deodorant. I went to buy deodorant yesterday. All the deodorant was
01:03:05
◼
►
under lock and key. So I got to call some kid to come over and unlock a little deodorant jail
01:03:10
◼
►
to open it up for me and then walk me to the counter like an animal.
01:03:13
◼
►
PAUL Right. And they wonder why we're buying all our stuff from Amazon. Well, anyway,
01:03:16
◼
►
Harry's has this fixed. It's great stuff. They keep expanding their line. They've got new stuff.
01:03:22
◼
►
So if you haven't checked them out in a while, go there. They have a new line, limited edition
01:03:27
◼
►
razors, the Jimmy Chin line. They're inspired by Jimmy Chin, who's a – I'd never heard him before,
01:03:34
◼
►
but he's an explorer and photographer. There's some pretty cool photos from him, but it's a new
01:03:40
◼
►
limited edition line of razors. Really, really cool looking. They have great stuff. They also
01:03:45
◼
►
have, they have these subscriptions. I don't know. They call them shave plans. You go there
01:03:50
◼
►
and you tell them how often you shave. Do you shave every day? Do you shave once a week? Tell
01:03:55
◼
►
them how often you shave and then you get a plan that will just have new stuff show up on a regular
01:04:01
◼
►
basis right when you need it and you can cancel anytime you want to grow a beard
01:04:06
◼
►
you want to stop shaving you want to switch to another brand you can just
01:04:08
◼
►
cancel at any time it's like Tonks for for razors really so I mean like for
01:04:14
◼
►
example I I've bought coffee like once in the last year because there was like
01:04:19
◼
►
one stretch where I'd gotten ahead of my Tonks and needed to go buy it I don't
01:04:25
◼
►
buy razors anymore I don't have to buy shaving cream anymore it just shows up
01:04:28
◼
►
on a regular basis from Harry's really great stuff and they have a special deal
01:04:34
◼
►
for listeners of the show the code is talk show just ta lk sh ow and that will
01:04:43
◼
►
save you five bucks on your first order so it's only good for people who are
01:04:49
◼
►
making their first order if you're already a Harry's customer just go and
01:04:52
◼
►
renew and sign up for a plan sorry but if you're new if you haven't used it yet
01:04:56
◼
►
use the code talk show know the and you'll save five bucks and you can get a
01:05:01
◼
►
kit for like 15 bucks so you'd only cost you like 10 so for 10 bucks you can
01:05:05
◼
►
totally upgrade your your shave good people at Harry's yeah great service you
01:05:12
◼
►
know what make a great code good offer code what would make a good I will never
01:05:17
◼
►
buy anything from assholes who paid John Gruber for sponsorships that was that
01:05:25
◼
►
from our friend Dave over at man he was looking through his refers his refers
01:05:32
◼
►
over at mad.com they sponsored a whole slew I love their sponsorships oh my god
01:05:38
◼
►
that was the best sponsors ever I said still blows me away what they did with
01:05:42
◼
►
the Darren fireballs like the four oh didn't do like a was like a 404 page or
01:05:45
◼
►
something they once the one way they did like three straight weeks and the one
01:05:48
◼
►
was a was a it was a typo and they wanted a typo into URL so it went to a
01:05:53
◼
►
a 404 page. And so they got one referral, it looks like a Google Analytics screenshot they
01:05:59
◼
►
posted. Right, they had one that was just the title of the link was an ellipse. It's
01:06:06
◼
►
just three dots and then it just said the message that only went in the feed it just said in this
01:06:11
◼
►
week before Christmas we thought it'd be nice to take our daring fireball sponsorship and not pitch
01:06:15
◼
►
you on anything enjoy the holidays meh. And they didn't have a link it didn't it they signed it meh
01:06:20
◼
►
but they didn't link to their website there was no there was no URL it just
01:06:24
◼
►
went nowhere and then the week before was the one where they had the the ASCII
01:06:29
◼
►
art of a guy flipping a table right that said Amazon upside down like with those
01:06:37
◼
►
crazy Unicode characters that were happy holidays right which only made sense
01:06:42
◼
►
which is cool because it only made sense if you knew the backstory yeah that
01:06:46
◼
►
relationship yeah that they had started woot the same guys who did woot
01:06:50
◼
►
and they sold the Amazon and you ever read that story like Paul kafasa sleep
01:06:57
◼
►
oh yeah I think I think I did it it sounds like it was not ideal yeah it was
01:07:00
◼
►
like Amazon bought them and they didn't do well they weren't happy it didn't see
01:07:04
◼
►
my gam is uncared and and the founder had like a breakfast with Jeff Bezos
01:07:12
◼
►
Bezos yeah he's oh so whatever and you know basis is going on and on about
01:07:17
◼
►
whatever and he's like well look can I ask you a question he was like why did
01:07:20
◼
►
you buy whoo and it was like he just like stared at his like breakfast and
01:07:25
◼
►
there was like this one weird thing on his you know breakfast platter like a
01:07:29
◼
►
some weird vegetable he was like your thing was like this this piece of weird
01:07:35
◼
►
lettuce I didn't understand it so I wanted to buy it I didn't get it so I
01:07:41
◼
►
just wanted to buy it what a psycho yeah it seems like a real nut job he does he
01:07:46
◼
►
seems easy and like the whole story of like the Amazon the fire phone it just
01:07:50
◼
►
sounds nuts yeah that was some great reporting I forget if I talked about
01:07:55
◼
►
this on the show or if I just linked it up on during fireball but Austin Carr
01:07:58
◼
►
wrote that for a fast company and really really top-notch like if you want to
01:08:05
◼
►
bemoan the lack of actual reporting that goes on today man that's a great
01:08:09
◼
►
counter example because he really did the legwork he clearly got people who
01:08:13
◼
►
worked on that phone to talk and Bezos sounds like basically Bezos like it was his passion project. He
01:08:18
◼
►
dove in with both feet and I don't say micromanaged, but he like he had would not. He would not go off
01:08:25
◼
►
his decisions at any point, right? Like he was very decisive about exactly how this thing was
01:08:30
◼
►
going to work. It wasn't listening to anybody. Yeah, yeah, I think long story short. Well,
01:08:35
◼
►
how did the fire phone come to be? I would say long story short, based on Austin cards reporting.
01:08:40
◼
►
it was something to the effect of we should do a phone if we do a phone should it should either be
01:08:47
◼
►
really cheap or it should be asked if it's not really cheap then it has to compete with the
01:08:52
◼
►
iphone oh and the 3d it's got to do 3d right well that become like a thing that was the thing like
01:08:57
◼
►
so then the next step bezos was like well i want to compete with the iphone and because i think he
01:09:01
◼
►
wanted to make a phone that he would actually use right so like what's the point of like them making
01:09:05
◼
►
a cheap phone if they themselves are also going to use iphone so they wanted to they're going to go
01:09:08
◼
►
go high-end. Then the next step in the logical chain is well then we have
01:09:12
◼
►
to have a hook, right? There has to be something. If we're gonna sell a phone
01:09:15
◼
►
that's like four or five hundred bucks, there has to be something that is
01:09:19
◼
►
compelling about it. And Bezos latched on to this 3D thing, you know, everybody
01:09:25
◼
►
knows the basic, you know, that there's 3D interface that using accelerometers
01:09:28
◼
►
and four cameras on the front, you know, that it can, without any special
01:09:33
◼
►
glasses it makes like a fake 3d effect on the flat surface of the phone and
01:09:40
◼
►
there was like no budging him off that that's you know that's like our Siri
01:09:44
◼
►
that's our hook that we can advertise everybody's gonna go nuts for it and
01:09:48
◼
►
there was apparently a lot of internal skepticism that this would have any
01:09:52
◼
►
actual appeal like well what's the point it's a niche the gist of a lot of the
01:09:56
◼
►
people seem to think well it is a neat trick but what is the point and then the
01:10:00
◼
►
phone shipped and everybody said well it's a neat trick but what's the point
01:10:03
◼
►
but he stuck with it right well he printed up a lot of cardboard boxes that
01:10:09
◼
►
said buy a fire phone that was so weird the first time I got an Amazon box with
01:10:13
◼
►
that that on the tape I was like what I was like somebody sent me an Amazon
01:10:18
◼
►
fire phone I thought the same thing I thought the same thing because every you
01:10:21
◼
►
know and I thought it was believable for me because nobody's ever sent me a phone
01:10:27
◼
►
Like no company but like I do get some equipment to try you weren't in a sprint program back in the day
01:10:33
◼
►
No, I was in some well
01:10:35
◼
►
I've gotten I got the G1 from Google HTC was nice enough to send me that I remember that that was fun
01:10:41
◼
►
And but I was in this thing where Sprint would just they were sending bloggers like new phones every few months like in the days
01:10:47
◼
►
Before I wrote because it was around the time of the iPhone and I finally got this totally crazy looking one
01:10:53
◼
►
where it had screens on both sides and it was kind of meant to look like an
01:10:57
◼
►
iPhone but you would do stuff you would need to flip the phone around and use
01:11:00
◼
►
different keyboards and a touchscreen was totally crazy well but it's not
01:11:04
◼
►
outlandish to know that that somebody would send me a firefight and that's
01:11:07
◼
►
what I thought it was and it was a box it was a box that was about the size
01:11:10
◼
►
that a phone might come in I was like I cannot believe somebody sent me a
01:11:13
◼
►
fire phone and I opened it up and it was I don't know toothpaste so great all
01:11:20
◼
►
- All right.
01:11:20
◼
►
Should we do it?
01:11:24
◼
►
- Well, let's do one more thing and then we'll do it.
01:11:26
◼
►
Here's the other thing.
01:11:27
◼
►
I wanna go circle back on the vaccinations.
01:11:30
◼
►
- Oh, Jesus.
01:11:31
◼
►
- Well, not the vaccinations in particular,
01:11:33
◼
►
but to me, it's a product of the internet age.
01:11:36
◼
►
This is why I'm a little pessimistic about it getting fixed
01:11:39
◼
►
because I think pre-internet,
01:11:42
◼
►
there just wasn't enough information for people to do that.
01:11:46
◼
►
Like, your best source of information
01:11:48
◼
►
the health of your kid was what your pediatrician told you and if your pediatrician said we
01:11:52
◼
►
recommend these immunizations on this schedule well you know you're.
01:11:58
◼
►
And maybe you might rely on your family too.
01:12:02
◼
►
Think about like the things you hear about brand loyalty and how people who are pampers
01:12:06
◼
►
you know the mom used pampers so they use pampers and we're a Heinz ketchup family and
01:12:10
◼
►
so forth like you know I think a lot of people especially at a young and impressionable age
01:12:14
◼
►
having a kid take a lot of that from from what their family would say they'd be like
01:12:17
◼
►
Are you kidding me? You know, you know aunt Linda died because she wasn't vaccinated. Of course, you're gonna vaccinate your kids
01:12:23
◼
►
And it's you know that now though, you know
01:12:26
◼
►
Not that I'm not trying to say that pre-internet that nobody questioned their doctor, of course
01:12:30
◼
►
I mean, you know the second opinion is part of our vernacular, you know, of course people might question their doctor
01:12:36
◼
►
Especially if you know the recommendation was surgery or something like that
01:12:41
◼
►
But now it's so easy for people to just find what they want to find whereas you couldn't do that before and there's that
01:12:48
◼
►
Stencil it's a spray-painted stencil. It's all you know, you can't go anywhere without seeing it, but you see it everywhere
01:12:53
◼
►
This the saying stop making stupid people famous
01:12:56
◼
►
Right, which is trite, but it's true
01:13:00
◼
►
It is absolutely the problem of the modern age is that we've made a lot of stupid people very famous and not but I also feel
01:13:07
◼
►
think about something like WebMD and I don't think any of us can say we've
01:13:11
◼
►
never looked at WebMD when we're pretty sure we have cancer. Like you know there
01:13:15
◼
►
is also the the internet has empowered us to believe that we we can learn a lot
01:13:21
◼
►
on our own. I guess this is kind of what you're already saying but you know now
01:13:24
◼
►
we feel like there's this resource in the same way that we might not go spend
01:13:27
◼
►
several weeks at the library you know looking up carcinoma. Now today like
01:13:31
◼
►
we'll keep keep looking until we find the thing that makes sense to us. Yeah and
01:13:36
◼
►
And it's, you know, yeah, again,
01:13:38
◼
►
the worst thing you can possibly do
01:13:39
◼
►
when you have some kind of health problem is Google it.
01:13:41
◼
►
And it's, of course, the first thing that we all do.
01:13:43
◼
►
I mean, you can't help but do it,
01:13:45
◼
►
but it's the worst thing you can do.
01:13:48
◼
►
- It's 'cause it's just gonna,
01:13:49
◼
►
now you have whatever your problem is
01:13:51
◼
►
and now you've got terrible anxiety about it
01:13:53
◼
►
because you've proven that you have, you know,
01:13:56
◼
►
something incurable.
01:13:57
◼
►
- Have you ever gone into a doctor's office
01:13:58
◼
►
with a printout?
01:13:59
◼
►
- No, I have not.
01:14:02
◼
►
- They do not like that.
01:14:03
◼
►
- Nope, but I'm not saying I wouldn't, though.
01:14:06
◼
►
I'm not saying I wouldn't I'm just saying I haven't.
01:14:08
◼
►
- I could see Amy doing a lot of research.
01:14:11
◼
►
I could see her being a very well informed
01:14:13
◼
►
with the kid stuff.
01:14:14
◼
►
I could see her being a very well informed parent
01:14:16
◼
►
on that stuff.
01:14:17
◼
►
- Yeah, I think she's very, she's hyper informed.
01:14:20
◼
►
- And hyper vigilant, right?
01:14:23
◼
►
Like she's got that EpiPen,
01:14:25
◼
►
she's like Marshall Dillon with that thing, right?
01:14:27
◼
►
- Yeah, and she does, she really does know
01:14:29
◼
►
an awful lot about it.
01:14:31
◼
►
Again, I think she'd be the first to tell you
01:14:33
◼
►
that she does not know more than our Jonas's allergist does,
01:14:37
◼
►
but she certainly knows a lot more than she used to.
01:14:40
◼
►
But I do think that that's, I don't know,
01:14:44
◼
►
I feel like that's a big part of the problem
01:14:46
◼
►
of the modern age is that you can,
01:14:48
◼
►
there's a, it's easy for anybody to have a soapbox
01:14:52
◼
►
and get more than just the people who can,
01:14:59
◼
►
in the old days if you were a lunatic,
01:15:02
◼
►
only the people within earshot could hear you.
01:15:05
◼
►
Now anybody can listen.
01:15:07
◼
►
- Yeah, it's funny.
01:15:07
◼
►
There's all these little,
01:15:08
◼
►
setting aside the dark web or the dark net or whatever,
01:15:11
◼
►
there's this one funny sort of source of information
01:15:16
◼
►
that's been around for a long time
01:15:17
◼
►
but still remains largely hidden from plain sight,
01:15:20
◼
►
which is forums or fora, I guess.
01:15:23
◼
►
There are so many places where if you Google
01:15:25
◼
►
for certain kinds of information,
01:15:27
◼
►
all kinds of certain kinds of information,
01:15:29
◼
►
you are very likely to,
01:15:32
◼
►
Somebody suggested for example, yesterday I was talking,
01:15:35
◼
►
I think yesterday I'm back to work talking about how I'm trying not to drink too much coffee.
01:15:38
◼
►
You know, I don't want to be too spazzy and somebody had recommended this stuff called L-theanamine or something like that,
01:15:44
◼
►
which is like a green tea extract or something.
01:15:46
◼
►
And so I went in and I googled it.
01:15:48
◼
►
And like so many results on forums where people are like saying the most outlandish things.
01:15:54
◼
►
But like I kept reading it.
01:15:56
◼
►
I immediately felt like, you know, I got to take all this with a grain of salt,
01:16:00
◼
►
but I still kept reading looking for somebody who sounded like they knew what they were talking about and I have no way of knowing if anybody's knows what they're talking about.
01:16:06
◼
►
I think it's a very common thing.
01:16:08
◼
►
Do you find that as I'm getting older and I find that I'm getting a lot more sensitive to things like having drunk too much coffee.
01:16:16
◼
►
Oh, absolutely.
01:16:18
◼
►
I don't think it's like I think it's actually more of like a self-awareness though than like not that I used to be able to metabolize more.
01:16:24
◼
►
more it's that I would drink too much coffee and wouldn't even notice whereas
01:16:30
◼
►
now I'm like wow my brain is bananas right now oh yeah I I talk about this a
01:16:35
◼
►
lot on the show with Dan I mean I have to be very circumspect about something
01:16:40
◼
►
that sounds unbelievable to me now which is that I have to be very careful about
01:16:45
◼
►
how much caffeine or stimulants in general I put in my body after about 12
01:16:49
◼
►
for one because they say the half-life or like that's mostly out of your body
01:16:53
◼
►
in like eight hours and that's not true for me.
01:16:55
◼
►
I'll just be laying, if I have a coffee at two,
01:16:57
◼
►
I'll just be laying there in bed with my heart beating.
01:16:59
◼
►
And so, and also, another thing I said other places,
01:17:03
◼
►
is I feel like I don't always get the same positive effects
01:17:05
◼
►
that I used to get, but I definitely still get
01:17:07
◼
►
all the negative effects.
01:17:09
◼
►
You know what I mean?
01:17:10
◼
►
Where I don't, it used to be where I was like,
01:17:12
◼
►
I'm young and virile and I can have Thai food and coffee
01:17:15
◼
►
at 11 at night, whoosh.
01:17:16
◼
►
And now today, like, that's just,
01:17:18
◼
►
that's a terrible idea for me.
01:17:20
◼
►
So yeah, the sensitivity, for real.
01:17:21
◼
►
yeah there's lots of stuff like that foods too I mean I
01:17:25
◼
►
anyway I make the same amount of coffee every day
01:17:28
◼
►
and I think it's you know it's like the right dose for me but then like
01:17:32
◼
►
I used to I don't really do anymore like sometimes I just get bored at four in the
01:17:35
◼
►
afternoon and think well I have another
01:17:36
◼
►
I'll you know go make one of these. I've done that my whole life that's exactly what I would do
01:17:39
◼
►
some people eat at three o'clock and I'm like I want to have a coffee
01:17:43
◼
►
I'll go make one I'll make one cup with the AeroPress and then I'll you know
01:17:46
◼
►
taste a little better
01:17:47
◼
►
and and then I'm you know at like six
01:17:51
◼
►
PM, I'm like, wait, I've been trying to read this 800 word article for half an hour.
01:17:56
◼
►
And instead, I've got 20 other tabs here. I really wanted to read this article. What happened to it?
01:18:01
◼
►
I totally had that this morning. I had two cups of coffee.
01:18:05
◼
►
Well, and then I'm like, that's a freaking coffee. I should not have had that extra coffee.
01:18:10
◼
►
I did that this morning. I had two cups of coffee and I sat down to read the entire Wikipedia page
01:18:15
◼
►
on the history of the MPAA rating system, which doesn't seem that hard. It's pretty standard
01:18:20
◼
►
English I got like I got like two headings in and I was like let's ride
01:18:23
◼
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bikes I you know I couldn't even concentrate so I'm slightly prepped but
01:18:28
◼
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all right let me do one more sponsor okay and that is our good friends at
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fracture and you guys know fracture fracture is a place you send them your
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photos your images they print those photos directly onto glass and then they
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They put them in a really cool cardboard package
01:18:50
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that serves, after you open the package,
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as the thing that you can use to hang it on a wall,
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or the thing you can fold out to prop it up on your desk,
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or your mantel, or wherever you wanna put it.
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All self-contained, right there,
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and your photos printed beautifully directly on glass.
01:19:10
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I always use the same analogy that it comes across
01:19:14
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like the way when they started laminating the LCDs
01:19:17
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the iPhone displays and makes the pixels look like they're right on the glass.
01:19:20
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Well, that's what your printed photos look like when you get them from Fracture. Really beautiful.
01:19:25
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I just can't emphasize how easy it is. Once you get them in your house, it's ready to be hung.
01:19:31
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You don't have to take it and go get the frames at IKEA or wherever and then put the photo in a
01:19:36
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frame. It is a frame. It's right there, has no border. It's beautiful. Great, great gift idea.
01:19:44
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Probably too late, I guess for you guys for Valentine's Day, but I don't know Mother's Day is coming up
01:19:48
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That's for sure great gift idea
01:19:50
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Just go there check them out and they have great prices. They have all sorts of sizes
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From really small to really really big
01:20:00
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There's the square ones so you can print your instagrams whatever you want to do really great stuff
01:20:08
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I cannot emphasize enough if you have any reason that you want to print a photo take a good photo of your kid
01:20:12
◼
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I should I should get this one hanging on the wall go to fracture do it there. You will not regret it
01:20:17
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their website fracture me calm
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Fracture me calm and they have a code
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So go to fracture me calm get a photo printed out and use that code daring fireball. You'll save some money
01:20:36
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All right, here's the idea
01:20:41
◼
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What do you want to do out you you you mentioned it because it was actually your idea at first no
01:20:45
◼
►
You know, you can go ahead. Well the basic idea not to turn it into a parenting podcast, but it's it's
01:20:52
◼
►
overarching dilemma of what movies
01:20:55
◼
►
Do you let your kids watch when like what age like where do you balance this and I have found it to be?
01:21:05
◼
►
For the you know from the get-go right from when he was Jonas was old enough to just sit in front of a TV
01:21:10
◼
►
It's a vexing dilemma, and I never totally a moving target. I
01:21:15
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►
Totally and I never anticipated it being difficult. I
01:21:19
◼
►
Just always thought before I had a kid that at any given moment
01:21:23
◼
►
You could give me any movie or TV show and I could instantly tell you whether it was age-appropriate or not
01:21:28
◼
►
But it ends up being I think devilishly tricky. Well exactly right
01:21:31
◼
►
So, I mean the only thing I would want to establish is that you know, we went to college and stuff
01:21:35
◼
►
We understand that there are things like ratings. I think that the part that makes this so challenging
01:21:40
◼
►
is how different every kid is in terms of what they are sensitive to.
01:21:45
◼
►
What's likely to be problematic or you know to cause troubles and nightmares.
01:21:51
◼
►
It's not as simple. I would postulate it's not nearly as simple as
01:21:56
◼
►
just saying I'm gonna trust the MPAA because there are plenty of g-rated
01:21:59
◼
►
movies with stuff in it that a three-year-old, some three-year-olds, right?
01:22:02
◼
►
A given three-year-old should not see and if the parents know that like you
01:22:07
◼
►
know it's really good to avoid that I mean one that comes up a lot it's like
01:22:11
◼
►
scary music a genre of what's just called scary music like boom cellos we're
01:22:15
◼
►
going into the woods some kids that could watch somebody be decapitated
01:22:19
◼
►
freak out my daughter things jumping into and out of frame completely freak
01:22:24
◼
►
her out real oh yeah you know like in like a horror movie kind of thing like
01:22:27
◼
►
we're so I know you yeah like in the background pops up even in in any kind
01:22:32
◼
►
of a movie no matter how innocuous it can kind of freak her out so yeah
01:22:36
◼
►
- Yeah, exactly, it's not, the thing is it's,
01:22:38
◼
►
and then on the other hand there are some kids
01:22:40
◼
►
where like if you fast forward through this one scene
01:22:43
◼
►
or this other scene, they would be totally fine
01:22:45
◼
►
watching some PG-13 movies.
01:22:47
◼
►
And it's just, I think it's,
01:22:49
◼
►
I'm sure we both have some horror stories
01:22:51
◼
►
about terrible decisions, but also just,
01:22:54
◼
►
I think it's interesting to talk about
01:22:55
◼
►
'cause I think everybody wants to look like
01:22:57
◼
►
they're real smart about it,
01:22:58
◼
►
and I think almost everybody who lets their kid
01:23:00
◼
►
watch movies worries about it.
01:23:03
◼
►
Worries about getting the mix wrong.
01:23:05
◼
►
Yeah, and I'll give you one example from Jonas when he was young.
01:23:11
◼
►
And we, I would say on the grand scheme of things, we are relatively permissive and always
01:23:17
◼
►
But I don't –
01:23:20
◼
►
I'm laughing because I used to shake my head when you would tell me things that you would
01:23:25
◼
►
let him do and now I do the same stuff.
01:23:28
◼
►
But also I really feel like a big part of that though was knowing what he was good with
01:23:33
◼
►
and he was good. I think with relatively advanced like violence in movies, you know he watched Star
01:23:41
◼
►
Wars very very young and you know I don't think that there I watched it when I was in kindergarten
01:23:46
◼
►
too. That was my thinking. I don't know. I was in kindergarten when it came out. I turned out all
01:23:49
◼
►
right. But I remember but you never know though there's always little things so one of the we
01:23:55
◼
►
let him watch the Pirates of the Caribbean movies at a very early age. And I think that those are
01:24:01
◼
►
PG I don't think they're PG-13 I don't know man they got some pretty spooky stuff well he didn't
01:24:05
◼
►
but the point is he didn't mind it no not at all except for one scene which is and I don't remember
01:24:11
◼
►
which one of them it's in but there's one scene where uh uh it must have been the first one where
01:24:19
◼
►
they're going after the gold that if you stole the gold you became a ghost or whatever and you had to
01:24:22
◼
►
drop a piece of blood and they cut somebody somebody takes a knife and just puts like a little
01:24:27
◼
►
like a PG rated cut on the palm of somebody's hand. Oh, yeah, and
01:24:31
◼
►
He it just flipped him out and he had like a fit and he was like we're like, what's wrong?
01:24:37
◼
►
What's wrong?
01:24:38
◼
►
And he just was holding his hand and he said like I can feel it I can feel it and he's just screaming
01:24:43
◼
►
Like it made him feel as though his hand had been cut but my kid will come
01:24:48
◼
►
Compulsively I was the word I'm looking for
01:24:51
◼
►
Well, like automatically like violently turn away from the screen whenever there's blood like, you know
01:24:55
◼
►
like a cut or something like that or like a wound. She absolutely turns away.
01:24:59
◼
►
RL Yeah, and so we –
01:25:00
◼
►
CB And so, it was like middle of the day, noon,
01:25:04
◼
►
me working at home like probably five, six years ago. And we both looked at each other like we just
01:25:13
◼
►
gave each other this look like, "Oh my God, what have we done? We've wrecked this poor child's mind
01:25:17
◼
►
by letting him watch this movie that we should have known he was too young to watch." But you just
01:25:23
◼
►
just never know. And then and and he would be good. He wouldn't
01:25:26
◼
►
refuse to watch that movie, but I'll tell you what he had it
01:25:29
◼
►
down stone. He knew exactly when that scene was coming up
01:25:33
◼
►
and he would run out and he would say what he used to say.
01:25:36
◼
►
He'd call it past past forward. My daughter would say fast over
01:25:41
◼
►
past. She says that he passed over that yeah anytime when
01:25:45
◼
►
they got to the point where in Toy Story two when Buzz has to
01:25:48
◼
►
at the beginning in the video game when he has to walk out
01:25:50
◼
►
across the floating disks.
01:25:52
◼
►
- Oh yeah, yeah. - Should I say daddy fast over?
01:25:55
◼
►
- Fast over, I like that one too.
01:25:57
◼
►
They're both good.
01:25:58
◼
►
Pass forward.
01:25:59
◼
►
- Oh my God, it's--
01:26:01
◼
►
- Jonas's list included the Wampa, no Wampa.
01:26:06
◼
►
- Oh, see, and that's a good, that's another example
01:26:08
◼
►
of a jumping into frame thing.
01:26:10
◼
►
- Yeah, you know what, that's it, yeah.
01:26:12
◼
►
'Cause, you know, and the suspense, right?
01:26:16
◼
►
It's 'cause the Wampa, the first time you see him,
01:26:21
◼
►
it's the shock air, right?
01:26:23
◼
►
Like Luke is like looking for comets or whatever
01:26:25
◼
►
to hit the ground and all of a sudden, boom,
01:26:28
◼
►
the Wampa jumps into frame and makes a terrible noise.
01:26:31
◼
►
So you've got that, right?
01:26:33
◼
►
That, and yeah, that, Jonas didn't like that.
01:26:36
◼
►
And Jonas wanted that whole, the whole thing skipped though
01:26:38
◼
►
because he also could not bear the suspense of Luke.
01:26:42
◼
►
- Hanging there like a side of beef.
01:26:44
◼
►
- Yeah, and not, you know, it's like the first time
01:26:46
◼
►
he's ever even tried to use the force to get a lightsaber
01:26:49
◼
►
and it's just sitting there jiggling, you know.
01:26:51
◼
►
It's like film school 101, you know,
01:26:53
◼
►
like how to build a little suspense, you know,
01:26:55
◼
►
jiggle the lightsaber, do this, the mute, you know,
01:26:58
◼
►
perfect, of course, John Williams score for the moment,
01:27:01
◼
►
which furthers the suspense, couldn't take it.
01:27:04
◼
►
It would just have like an aneurysm.
01:27:06
◼
►
- What about one that I was scared of
01:27:08
◼
►
and my kid was scared of, what about in episode four
01:27:11
◼
►
when Luke's looking through the binoculars
01:27:13
◼
►
and the Tuscan Raider goes, "Rrrr!"
01:27:16
◼
►
- No. - Not at all.
01:27:17
◼
►
- Even though, to me, it's actually just,
01:27:19
◼
►
it's the same thing, right? - Yeah, totally.
01:27:20
◼
►
- No, yeah, it didn't bother him, nope.
01:27:23
◼
►
- That's so weird.
01:27:24
◼
►
See, this is what I'm talking about.
01:27:25
◼
►
- Right, the Wampa, terrifying.
01:27:27
◼
►
The Tuscan Raider who does the exact same thing. (laughs)
01:27:32
◼
►
- You know, but you know, here's, but you get,
01:27:34
◼
►
I remember talking to Matt Howey about this
01:27:35
◼
►
and about how his daughter, he felt like his daughter was,
01:27:38
◼
►
you know, very sensitive to certain kinds of things.
01:27:40
◼
►
She's a really sweet kid, and is like relationship things,
01:27:42
◼
►
and some people are very sensitive to almost everything
01:27:44
◼
►
and other people, it's virtually impossible to tell.
01:27:47
◼
►
My daughter has seen some really grisly shit in movies.
01:27:50
◼
►
Like she saw Deadpool putting his head back on
01:27:52
◼
►
at the end of an X-Men.
01:27:53
◼
►
I didn't show her the whole movie.
01:27:54
◼
►
I was just like, you gotta see the scene
01:27:55
◼
►
where Deadpool puts his head back on.
01:27:57
◼
►
It's pretty great.
01:27:58
◼
►
A terrible movie.
01:27:58
◼
►
But there are some things where I can't guess.
01:28:01
◼
►
Okay, so for example, she's watched a ton of Doctor Who,
01:28:03
◼
►
a little scared by the Daleks.
01:28:05
◼
►
She's watched pretty much almost every Marvel movie
01:28:09
◼
►
except for a few.
01:28:11
◼
►
And all the Star Wars movies numerous times.
01:28:14
◼
►
But then you know what we watch?
01:28:15
◼
►
Did you ever see that show on Cartoon Network
01:28:18
◼
►
from last year called Over the Garden Wall?
01:28:20
◼
►
- No, never heard of it.
01:28:21
◼
►
- It's kind of like, it's an Adventure Timey thing
01:28:23
◼
►
about these two little boys who are brothers
01:28:25
◼
►
having these like kind of fairytale adventures
01:28:27
◼
►
combined with like a Silly Symphonies cartoon feel.
01:28:29
◼
►
It's a really great show,
01:28:31
◼
►
but it is like a fairytale kind of show
01:28:35
◼
►
where there's scary stuff that's not exactly explained.
01:28:39
◼
►
But it's a kids show.
01:28:40
◼
►
It's like it is in the same way as Adventure Time, kind of.
01:28:42
◼
►
It's kind of a kids show.
01:28:44
◼
►
And that is the one stuck with her,
01:28:46
◼
►
this creature on there called the Beast.
01:28:48
◼
►
And I didn't find out for weeks
01:28:49
◼
►
that she thought the Beast was under her bed.
01:28:51
◼
►
She was scared to even say anything.
01:28:53
◼
►
And I was like, "Oh honey, I am so sorry."
01:28:54
◼
►
And mom, of course, gives me the eyes.
01:28:57
◼
►
It's like, "See, see, see?
01:28:58
◼
►
"I knew this was gonna happen."
01:28:59
◼
►
But again, would you guess?
01:29:01
◼
►
I mean, she didn't mind people's faces melting off
01:29:03
◼
►
in Raiders of the Lost Ark,
01:29:05
◼
►
But the idea of like a black bee,
01:29:07
◼
►
this kind of cartoon bear in the forest is terrifying.
01:29:12
◼
►
- Yeah, I remember I had a friend growing up who,
01:29:15
◼
►
I missed, I don't know how,
01:29:18
◼
►
but I missed Raiders of the Lost Ark
01:29:20
◼
►
when it was in the theaters.
01:29:22
◼
►
So I didn't see it.
01:29:23
◼
►
But it always bothered me.
01:29:25
◼
►
- How old were you?
01:29:26
◼
►
I was about 13, 14.
01:29:28
◼
►
- I was eight.
01:29:29
◼
►
So, you know, or nine, eight?
01:29:32
◼
►
I think it was 1981, so I was eight.
01:29:34
◼
►
But I desperately wanted to see it,
01:29:37
◼
►
couldn't understand how I missed it.
01:29:39
◼
►
Seemed like something I could've got my dad to take me to.
01:29:41
◼
►
Somehow I missed it, but then, of course,
01:29:43
◼
►
once it was out of theaters, there was no chance to see it.
01:29:45
◼
►
But I knew the basic story,
01:29:47
◼
►
and I just knew that there was something about it
01:29:49
◼
►
at the end, everybody's faces melted.
01:29:51
◼
►
And my one friend growing up
01:29:52
◼
►
was completely freaked out about it.
01:29:55
◼
►
He had gone to see it and came out crying,
01:29:57
◼
►
embarrassed himself, like his mom came out
01:30:00
◼
►
of the movie theater. - Poor kid, oh no.
01:30:02
◼
►
just cry and he wasn't the type of scary because it isn't just that like haha
01:30:06
◼
►
little skin melts off it's like a full-on Ray Harry housing thing we're
01:30:09
◼
►
like their entire head like it's a horrifying really effective effect yeah
01:30:15
◼
►
yeah but he was freaked out and he was the type of kid who just would not you
01:30:19
◼
►
know he wasn't like a sense you wouldn't call him a sensitive kid you really
01:30:23
◼
►
wouldn't you know it's just a normal boy who's going to see what should be and
01:30:27
◼
►
that just was happened to be his thing yeah I get just touched a nerve what
01:30:31
◼
►
What about, have you seen either the trailer or the movie for Paddington?
01:30:36
◼
►
That's probably Little Young for Jonas.
01:30:39
◼
►
But you've seen the trailer, right?
01:30:40
◼
►
I've seen the trailer.
01:30:42
◼
►
The trailer, I have heard from friends that the movie is, well, it's one of those movies,
01:30:46
◼
►
one of those rare movies where the movie is actually way better than the trailer looks,
01:30:49
◼
►
which I'm very glad to hear.
01:30:50
◼
►
But you've seen the trailer.
01:30:51
◼
►
There's a scene where he's in the bathroom.
01:30:53
◼
►
I don't, I'm going to, someday my daughter's going to hear this.
01:30:55
◼
►
I'm going to be in so much trouble.
01:30:56
◼
►
There's a scene in the bathroom where he's like interacting with what it is to be a bear
01:31:00
◼
►
using the bathroom and he takes a toothbrush and sticks it in his ear and pulls out this giant wad
01:31:06
◼
►
of totally disgusting looking earwax. It's a dumb shot. It's about three seconds and if I say the
01:31:14
◼
►
word Paddington my kid gets freaked out. She cannot stop thinking about the disgusting earwax. She
01:31:18
◼
►
will hear nothing about going to see that movie because of this one scene with earwax. Remember
01:31:23
◼
►
she's seen Deadpool put his head back on but the earwax thing put her off her beer. Yeah it's
01:31:28
◼
►
inexplicable. Can I toss out one more axis in bad parenting is the balance, weighing the balance.
01:31:37
◼
►
Okay, so let's take an extreme example. Let's take a kid who's like a classic introduction to movies
01:31:46
◼
►
age of like five. Would you show your kid the third X-Men movie if they're five years old?
01:31:55
◼
►
See now me, I'm gonna go, "You know what? I'm not because it's not a very good movie.
01:32:01
◼
►
There is a lot of inside words in it as we say in our house. There is some violence in it,
01:32:06
◼
►
but you know what? It's just not worth it because whatever she sees in it, it's not worth it because
01:32:09
◼
►
the movie is not that good. Would you hesitate to show your kid Toy Story 2? Oh my gosh, no.
01:32:14
◼
►
It's got scary things in it, a little bit, but it's so worth it." Right? So isn't that part of
01:32:20
◼
►
the balance though? It isn't like you're making your kids sit there and watch Castle Freak or
01:32:23
◼
►
or something like you're thinking like oh this is a perfect is this the perfect age
01:32:28
◼
►
to introduce this wonderful story to this kid yeah that's a very good point um it has
01:32:35
◼
►
to be you know the the quality of the movie factors because i mean in my own defense i'm
01:32:39
◼
►
sitting there with her watching the movie like what you know except in the case of mulan
01:32:42
◼
►
too when i'm on my ipad like i am there watching the movie with her we're talking about the
01:32:47
◼
►
movie not that it's like you know freaking harvard or something but just to be clear
01:32:50
◼
►
Like I it's got to be a movie. I like it's got to be good and it's got to be appropriate
01:32:54
◼
►
given what I can know or guess I
01:32:56
◼
►
Totally agree with that. I think you know what else had Jonah seen early
01:33:04
◼
►
I mean he saw the Bond movies back when Dan and I were talking about him
01:33:07
◼
►
I mean, you know, I don't know if you watched all of them with me
01:33:09
◼
►
but he sat through a bunch of them with me and
01:33:11
◼
►
that was weird on two levels because it also in addition to the fact that it's kind of violent for a
01:33:17
◼
►
a kid who was probably six or seven at the time.
01:33:20
◼
►
There's the anachronisms, right?
01:33:25
◼
►
I mean, I think Dan and I spent like half an hour
01:33:27
◼
►
just talking about-- - I got you on the pacing.
01:33:29
◼
►
And this is one that blew me out of the water.
01:33:30
◼
►
I sent you that picture of my kid
01:33:31
◼
►
punching Goldfinger in the face at a casino.
01:33:34
◼
►
Here's the thing, I knew this one was gonna be
01:33:37
◼
►
a long shot. - Look, people are gonna think
01:33:39
◼
►
that that was like a total Merlin euphemism,
01:33:42
◼
►
but you literally sent me a text
01:33:44
◼
►
with a picture of your daughter
01:33:46
◼
►
next to a picture of Goldfinger.
01:33:48
◼
►
- An unlicensed mural of James Bond characters.
01:33:51
◼
►
Punching our Goldfinger in the face.
01:33:54
◼
►
Okay, so, okay, and this one,
01:33:58
◼
►
I barely, barely, barely got this one past the censors.
01:34:00
◼
►
My wife was pretty iffy about this.
01:34:03
◼
►
'Cause if it's one where we're really worried,
01:34:04
◼
►
I will watch the entire movie through again to be sure.
01:34:07
◼
►
I definitely, we have to find time
01:34:09
◼
►
to talk about '80s movies
01:34:10
◼
►
and how, what completely weird animals '80s movies are.
01:34:13
◼
►
'Cause you never know when some boobies
01:34:15
◼
►
are gonna show up in an '80s movie.
01:34:17
◼
►
But Goldfinger, I was like,
01:34:18
◼
►
"Oh, it really is the best James Bond movie."
01:34:22
◼
►
And it's got this kind of a silly plot,
01:34:25
◼
►
but it's not that hard to follow.
01:34:26
◼
►
But you know what my main thing was?
01:34:28
◼
►
I was like, "She is going to watch,
01:34:32
◼
►
"she'll watch up to when he takes off the scuba thing
01:34:34
◼
►
"and have his tux on."
01:34:35
◼
►
That's pretty funny.
01:34:36
◼
►
But I was like, "The pacing of this movie
01:34:38
◼
►
"by her standards is so glacial,
01:34:40
◼
►
"there's no way she's gonna watch more than 20 minutes."
01:34:42
◼
►
And then it became the movie that she demanded to watch.
01:34:45
◼
►
It was completely perplexing.
01:34:46
◼
►
She's watching a thing where people are sitting
01:34:47
◼
►
and drinking mint juleps in Kentucky
01:34:49
◼
►
and talking about contaminating gold.
01:34:51
◼
►
I was blown away.
01:34:52
◼
►
So again, I had no idea that ended up being one
01:34:55
◼
►
that she really likes.
01:34:55
◼
►
And also when the laser almost cuts him in the penis,
01:34:57
◼
►
she turns and goes, "It's gonna cut him in the penis."
01:35:01
◼
►
- We did it in 2011.
01:35:03
◼
►
So Jonas was seven when I let him watch.
01:35:05
◼
►
- Same here with her.
01:35:06
◼
►
- Yeah, seven.
01:35:09
◼
►
- Seven year.
01:35:10
◼
►
- I don't think I watched it.
01:35:10
◼
►
- I watched it when I was seven.
01:35:11
◼
►
It was on TV once a year.
01:35:13
◼
►
I think the same way I don't know I mean you know one thing too with the violence
01:35:19
◼
►
I know and I know a lot of the you know there's what are the big three there's
01:35:23
◼
►
violence language and sex right I mean that's it's the big three like concerns
01:35:30
◼
►
you got smoking got sass mouth but I would say violent scariness scariness is
01:35:35
◼
►
I would say scariness is probably the top issue because I really do think that
01:35:39
◼
►
that a truly scary movie can upset a kid for days.
01:35:44
◼
►
I do realize, I absolutely realize that there are some kids,
01:35:49
◼
►
a lot of times boys, who if they see a movie
01:35:52
◼
►
where there's a lot of shooting action,
01:35:55
◼
►
even in a sort of cartoony way like Star Wars,
01:35:58
◼
►
that it gets the kid all amped up
01:36:00
◼
►
and then the kid starts jumping around the house
01:36:02
◼
►
smashing things, right?
01:36:03
◼
►
And it's like--
01:36:04
◼
►
- Or like I've shown her bits,
01:36:06
◼
►
I've shown her YouTube videos of Bruce Lee,
01:36:08
◼
►
like a best of Bruce Lee or something like that.
01:36:10
◼
►
And she just wants to kick everything after that.
01:36:13
◼
►
- Well, or worse, that kids wanna kick other kids
01:36:16
◼
►
or something like that. - Yeah, right, right.
01:36:17
◼
►
- Well, Jonas has never ever been like that.
01:36:18
◼
►
Jonas is a very gentle kid,
01:36:20
◼
►
and anything that he sees in a movie
01:36:22
◼
►
does not alter his behavior in the real world.
01:36:26
◼
►
So I mean, I think it allowed us to be a little permissive
01:36:29
◼
►
in that way.
01:36:30
◼
►
But I think most kids are actually pretty good that way.
01:36:32
◼
►
I think it's kind of rare.
01:36:34
◼
►
So the violence we've always, I don't know,
01:36:37
◼
►
a little liberal on? It depends on the violence. It depends on, I mean, you know, the thing is there
01:36:42
◼
►
are phrases that I would hear people use before I had a child and I would just, I would want to
01:36:47
◼
►
strangle the person. The phrase, a phrase I used to sneer at "imitative behavior," you know, that's
01:36:53
◼
►
sometimes in these reviews you'll see, well, it contains, you know, sass mouth and "imitative
01:36:57
◼
►
behavior," meaning, you know, the three stooges, right? That's a good example. Like, if you watch
01:37:01
◼
►
enough Three Stooges, you're probably gonna want to hit somebody on the head, you know, Maggie
01:37:04
◼
►
Simpson with the mallet or whatever but I think I think there's also I have
01:37:09
◼
►
fun this is really where I don't know I'm out on a limb but I think there are
01:37:13
◼
►
differences there's different kinds of violence I think stormtroopers getting
01:37:17
◼
►
bloodlessly shot with comic book violence is really different from
01:37:20
◼
►
Hellraiser and war or like the like saw I think there is a really big difference
01:37:26
◼
►
in degree and the personal miss of it so like there are some things and again we
01:37:30
◼
►
You gotta talk about 70s and 80s movies.
01:37:32
◼
►
There is so much completely random weird nudity and sex
01:37:36
◼
►
in 70s and 80s movies, especially 80s movies,
01:37:38
◼
►
but there's also some extremely personal violence
01:37:41
◼
►
in those kinds of movies.
01:37:43
◼
►
So the idea of holding somebody
01:37:44
◼
►
with a knife to their throat and cutting them,
01:37:47
◼
►
I think of that as a different kind of animal
01:37:48
◼
►
than a storm trooper getting shot personally.
01:37:51
◼
►
- Yeah, I do too, or even with just sticking to guns with,
01:37:54
◼
►
like when Bond, especially in the older ones,
01:37:57
◼
►
when Bond shoots somebody,
01:37:58
◼
►
It's practically like shooting a stormtrooper.
01:38:00
◼
►
I mean, it's like, you know, like the squib,
01:38:03
◼
►
the squib in the chest was just like a puff of smoke
01:38:05
◼
►
and the guy just, you know, falls into, you know,
01:38:10
◼
►
sharks with lasers pit.
01:38:11
◼
►
Whereas I think the more visceral violence
01:38:18
◼
►
and the more recent ones, like the Craig ones, you know,
01:38:21
◼
►
is a little different.
01:38:22
◼
►
- Oh my gosh.
01:38:24
◼
►
Oh no, no, no.
01:38:25
◼
►
I mean, this-- - Well, a lot different.
01:38:26
◼
►
- Yeah, yeah.
01:38:27
◼
►
I mean, I'm sorry, I didn't mean for some beef jerky.
01:38:29
◼
►
I thought I could pull it off.
01:38:33
◼
►
How's it going?
01:38:35
◼
►
- What do you think about the actual ratings?
01:38:38
◼
►
I still think it was a mistake
01:38:40
◼
►
to introduce the rating PG-13.
01:38:42
◼
►
- I find it, well, it certainly was easier at one time
01:38:48
◼
►
to understand, everybody knew what R-rated meant.
01:38:51
◼
►
R-rated meant you could expect some serious nudity
01:38:55
◼
►
and simulated sex.
01:38:57
◼
►
You could expect some shits and fucks,
01:38:59
◼
►
and you could expect smoking and drugs
01:39:02
◼
►
and French connection.
01:39:03
◼
►
That's an R-rated movie.
01:39:04
◼
►
That was easy to understand.
01:39:06
◼
►
Now, when, per that article I one-tenth read today,
01:39:09
◼
►
1984 comes along, you've got, was it "Temple of Doom?"
01:39:13
◼
►
"Temple of Doom" prompted-- - And "Gremlins"
01:39:15
◼
►
were two movies that people were just like,
01:39:17
◼
►
"This is just..."
01:39:18
◼
►
Now, "Gremlins," I think I could see "Gremlins"
01:39:19
◼
►
freaking my kid out, personally.
01:39:22
◼
►
And so it's kind of a weird movie.
01:39:24
◼
►
- Yeah, it is a weird movie.
01:39:25
◼
►
We just rewatched it, not recently,
01:39:27
◼
►
but maybe like last Christmas,
01:39:28
◼
►
'cause it's sort of a Christmas movie.
01:39:30
◼
►
- Yeah, it is. - So like about a year ago.
01:39:32
◼
►
- But even something like a movie we all love,
01:39:34
◼
►
it's, take a movie like "Groundhog Day."
01:39:37
◼
►
If "Groundhog Day" had just the smallest bit of editing,
01:39:42
◼
►
it would be maybe a canonical family movie.
01:39:45
◼
►
It's so close to being a, "Ghostbusters."
01:39:48
◼
►
You know how much nookie there is in "Ghostbusters"?
01:39:51
◼
►
You got a fake blowjob.
01:39:52
◼
►
You got, remember that?
01:39:55
◼
►
Remember that? Where Dan Aykroyd gets the ghost blowjob?
01:39:58
◼
►
And it's like, what's this doing in this movie?
01:40:00
◼
►
This is a movie for kids.
01:40:04
◼
►
Or just, you know, there's all these movies. This is still true today.
01:40:07
◼
►
I know with the Marvel movies, they're usually pretty good with the salty language until like the last act.
01:40:12
◼
►
And that's when all the shits and fucks come out.
01:40:15
◼
►
It's always like, what is the rule? Isn't there kind of like a standard for how many you're allowed in a PG-13 movie?
01:40:20
◼
►
Yeah, I think there's some kind of...
01:40:22
◼
►
And I think they'd like to really load him up in the back too for when the closing action
01:40:25
◼
►
but I'm just saying like that's the part that's perplexing is there like are you gonna tell
01:40:29
◼
►
me Ghostbusters is not right for kids oh here we go Back to the Future like there's some
01:40:33
◼
►
stuff in Back Back to the Future is a great a great family movie that still has some stuff
01:40:37
◼
►
in it that's a little edgy I mean you know he's in his underwear I guess that's not a
01:40:42
◼
►
big deal but you know it's straight Oh Home Alone I mean would you Home Alone that's a
01:40:47
◼
►
kids movie right yeah we've watched him yeah he gets an iron in the face
01:40:50
◼
►
that's that's worse than Wolverine I don't know I don't know the violence in
01:41:00
◼
►
Home Alone is kind of weird because it's on the one hand it's like they're kind
01:41:03
◼
►
of going for that Three Stooges thing and then the other hand there's like
01:41:06
◼
►
actual acid like walking up the steps in bare feet and you see the nail sticking
01:41:13
◼
►
out of the step and you're like this is the most horrific thing that I've ever
01:41:16
◼
►
seen he's because every kid's terrified your parents get you terrified about
01:41:19
◼
►
I get tetanus from a nail right and he steps on in like a three inch exposed like nail
01:41:25
◼
►
right it it is
01:41:27
◼
►
it's an interesting movie because it
01:41:30
◼
►
It does though bit like his
01:41:33
◼
►
What's his name Kevin young Kevin's mastery of these two buffoon criminals is?
01:41:39
◼
►
established cinematically such that you kind of get the sense that the kids gonna come out on top that he's you know,
01:41:47
◼
►
And that therefore his mastery of these two criminals, the way that he prolongs their stuff,
01:41:52
◼
►
it really does kind of in a sense, it's a little bit more like torture than self-defense.
01:41:56
◼
►
Jared: It is, it's like Grand Guignol. It's like he's deliberately making this as awful as he can.
01:42:01
◼
►
Pete: Yeah, it's less self-defense and more torture. He's kind of enjoying it.
01:42:06
◼
►
Jared; Oh man.
01:42:08
◼
►
Pete; Actually, I think there's a couple of scenes where like one of his, you know,
01:42:11
◼
►
traps works and he just flat out like high fives himself.
01:42:14
◼
►
Yes, that's why I gotta pick that up, which does the like her
01:42:18
◼
►
fist out and pumps it in goes yes. Fuller go easy on the
01:42:23
◼
►
Pepsi. I love that movie, but I don't know. I'm just saying
01:42:28
◼
►
okay now how about this? Alright PG-13 so they they I
01:42:31
◼
►
think it was a mistake cuz I think that the old way was G.
01:42:35
◼
►
That's a kid's movie. That's for everybody. PG is it's in
01:42:42
◼
►
and R is for adults and doesn't matter why it doesn't matter if it's my PGP
01:42:47
◼
►
says it all PG PG says like your mileage may vary like yeah you know it basically
01:42:51
◼
►
it almost kind of says like you need to like watch this before your kids do
01:42:57
◼
►
practically or like or like be advised right yeah be advised think about it you
01:43:02
◼
►
know if your kid is younger and if your kid is over 10 it's probably probably
01:43:06
◼
►
good yeah you know yeah I don't know but it's again that could to me the hard
01:43:10
◼
►
part is this sensitive, I sent you a link to this website that I look at a lot and I'm
01:43:16
◼
►
somewhat ambivalent about it and yet I find it extremely useful. I cannot believe I'm
01:43:19
◼
►
saying this. Have you seen, did you just look at that link, Kids in Mind? It's a very interesting
01:43:23
◼
►
idea because they go out and they review these movies, but it's very funny. So the none of
01:43:28
◼
►
it is they come up with these three numbers, not numerals because there's a 10. But how
01:43:36
◼
►
How much sex and nudity is there from zero to 10?
01:43:40
◼
►
How much violence and gore from zero to 10?
01:43:42
◼
►
How much profanity from zero to 10?
01:43:44
◼
►
Which I think it's a great, at least a fast glance.
01:43:48
◼
►
I mean, sometimes I use this to go like,
01:43:49
◼
►
okay, we're thinking about these two different movies,
01:43:51
◼
►
like which one of these looks better on the face of it?
01:43:54
◼
►
And sometimes, you know what I mean?
01:43:54
◼
►
It's a quick sniff test.
01:43:56
◼
►
But then did you go in and look at the actual page
01:44:00
◼
►
at like how it's like porn,
01:44:02
◼
►
where they describe all the stuff that's actually in it?
01:44:05
◼
►
No I didn't I'm looking at it now.
01:44:07
◼
►
Sponge and the way they describe it it's hilarious I want to meet the person who writes this.
01:44:12
◼
►
Spongebob movie which I absolutely do not want to see.
01:44:15
◼
►
Sex and nudity you get it too.
01:44:16
◼
►
We see many human men on the beach with bare chests.
01:44:19
◼
►
Many women wear skimpy bikinis and reveal cleavage.
01:44:22
◼
►
A sponge accidentally pulls the shorts partially down from a starfish's waist and we see the
01:44:25
◼
►
upper buttocks and buttock cleavage.
01:44:28
◼
►
I've got one here from Mordecai.
01:44:30
◼
►
Husband and his wife attempt to kiss several times in different scenes, but his moustache makes her gag
01:44:36
◼
►
And he gags in reflex. Oh my god
01:44:40
◼
►
Please see the violence and gore category for more details on the gagging
01:44:44
◼
►
It's but it doesn't it read like something like a Japanese man would buy for porn
01:44:48
◼
►
American sniper profanity gets a 10 about a hundred and fifteen f-words and its derivatives ten sexual references 32
01:44:56
◼
►
Gotta logical terms, 20 anatomical terms,
01:44:58
◼
►
12 mild obscenities, name calling,
01:45:00
◼
►
including sunshine, quitter, nuts, old man,
01:45:02
◼
►
hotbox, arrogant, self-centered, sitting ducks, legend.
01:45:05
◼
►
- See, why count all--
01:45:07
◼
►
- Somebody wrote all of those down, Jon.
01:45:09
◼
►
- Why count all 115 fucks?
01:45:12
◼
►
Because clearly, I mean, how long is the movie?
01:45:15
◼
►
Even if it's three hours.
01:45:16
◼
►
- Right, right, right.
01:45:17
◼
►
- You're on the border--
01:45:18
◼
►
- Two hours and 12 minutes.
01:45:20
◼
►
- So it's roughly one a minute.
01:45:23
◼
►
- You gotta fuck a minute.
01:45:25
◼
►
Right, unless there's like a burst at the end. It's, you know, I think you only have to go about
01:45:32
◼
►
two or three movies or minutes into this movie and you can just check off 10 on a profanity.
01:45:36
◼
►
Some of these. Oh my god.
01:45:38
◼
►
All right, it's like this. Like, if you're like the inspector for a hotel,
01:45:42
◼
►
like you don't have to count the bugs.
01:45:45
◼
►
Oh, like once you see five rats in the lobby.
01:45:49
◼
►
You just check that off. You just check it off. You don't have to count them.
01:45:52
◼
►
You don't have to count them.
01:45:54
◼
►
1998 film a lot of people a lot of families have enjoyed called the big Lebowski profanity. They give it a 10 about 240 f-words
01:46:01
◼
►
Many scatological references many anatomical references many mild obscenities here to fix Dinah Kabul
01:46:10
◼
►
This is great. I I I love this but I know that I'm gonna lose a lot of time on this site
01:46:17
◼
►
Like oh, I know but the things I can't show it to my wife
01:46:20
◼
►
Oh, I mean, I'm gonna say can't she's a grown-ass woman
01:46:22
◼
►
But you know it makes it when you read when you read it in this clinical way
01:46:26
◼
►
It makes it sound so much worse when they say a starfish is
01:46:30
◼
►
Swimsuit is pulled down reveals buttocks guys. That's Patrick. It's Patrick's but he's a goddamn cartoon character. It's okay if we see his butt
01:46:38
◼
►
All right. I looked up fantastic. Mr. Fox which is actually I was just talking to do I just watched it. I love it
01:46:46
◼
►
Kottke called it. Oh, I when I linked to a picture from it and he said it's underrated
01:46:51
◼
►
I think it's my favorite Wes Anderson
01:46:52
◼
►
It's it's it's one of my all-time favorite movies let alone one of our families like there's two movies
01:46:58
◼
►
Yeah, if we can't decide on anything and it comes to blows it's either the Incredibles or mr. Fox. That's it. Yeah, that's
01:47:03
◼
►
Those are yeah, those are two good ones to leave at the top of the queue. All right, so
01:47:12
◼
►
For sex and nudity. It's only ranked a one out of ten which meshes with my memory
01:47:17
◼
►
Here's what we've got. We've got a person in a swimsuit
01:47:21
◼
►
husband and a wife kissing
01:47:23
◼
►
Fox kissing hug a teen boy and a teen girl Fox flirt in a couple of scenes
01:47:29
◼
►
I do remember that you're supposed to be my lab partner. I know it number. No, you're not you're disloyal
01:47:34
◼
►
Number two a rat refers to a fox's wife as the quote town tart
01:47:43
◼
►
- Right, yeah, I never--
01:47:46
◼
►
- A fox wife tells her fox husband that she is pregnant.
01:47:50
◼
►
So that counts for a one on the sex nudity scale
01:47:53
◼
►
on pregnant? - While they're in a cage.
01:47:56
◼
►
Oh man, yeah, but again, you know what this is though?
01:47:59
◼
►
Okay, so I just gotta say,
01:48:00
◼
►
this is actually really helpful though,
01:48:02
◼
►
'cause like you say, this is the rats in the lobby title.
01:48:04
◼
►
It's like you can see, like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah,
01:48:07
◼
►
no, no, no, no, no, no, Big Lebowski's not gonna be great
01:48:09
◼
►
to watch with the kids, am I wrong?
01:48:10
◼
►
No, we're gonna skip this one.
01:48:12
◼
►
But it is also good that you can go through
01:48:14
◼
►
and look for like the stuff is like a trigger for your kids.
01:48:17
◼
►
- 27 exclamation, this is for profanity,
01:48:20
◼
►
27 exclamations.
01:48:21
◼
►
- What the cuss?
01:48:22
◼
►
- Cuss word.
01:48:23
◼
►
- Cussing with me?
01:48:24
◼
►
- What the cuss?
01:48:26
◼
►
- They count that as a cuss word?
01:48:28
◼
►
- Cuss is a cuss word?
01:48:30
◼
►
- Cluster cuss.
01:48:36
◼
►
They have a scatological terms glossary.
01:48:40
◼
►
You got F word derivatives,
01:48:43
◼
►
which all have little asterisks in them.
01:48:44
◼
►
Scatological terms, religious profanities, mild obscenities.
01:48:48
◼
►
Friggin' would be counted as a mild obscenity.
01:48:51
◼
►
- All right. - Derogatory terms.
01:48:54
◼
►
But you know, I still, I gotta say,
01:48:56
◼
►
no, no, let me ask you if you remember this.
01:48:57
◼
►
Do you remember?
01:48:59
◼
►
I'm gonna say circa mid to late 90s.
01:49:02
◼
►
Do you remember a service
01:49:04
◼
►
that was actually kind of like what became Netflix,
01:49:07
◼
►
where you could get edited movies.
01:49:10
◼
►
I think it might have been
01:49:11
◼
►
a somewhat overtly Christian place,
01:49:14
◼
►
but you could get like a PG movie
01:49:16
◼
►
that had all of the stuff a certain kind of religious person
01:49:19
◼
►
would find offensive cut out of it.
01:49:20
◼
►
Do you remember that at all?
01:49:21
◼
►
- I do remember hearing about it.
01:49:22
◼
►
- I remember hearing about it.
01:49:24
◼
►
I don't know where it went or what it did,
01:49:25
◼
►
but isn't that, especially now in the digital age,
01:49:27
◼
►
that's a very interesting idea.
01:49:29
◼
►
- Yeah, 'cause it would be,
01:49:30
◼
►
you could do it without losing fidelity.
01:49:32
◼
►
- I mean, you need just some basic metadata
01:49:34
◼
►
on like, well, you know, you could go in, it'd be so great.
01:49:37
◼
►
'Cause if you could go in and say,
01:49:39
◼
►
you know what, my family is observant
01:49:40
◼
►
and we don't want any god-dams.
01:49:42
◼
►
Could you, just with audio, blip out the god-dams,
01:49:46
◼
►
but leave in the horrific violence or whatever.
01:49:48
◼
►
Let's say you wanna show your kids Passion of the Christ.
01:49:50
◼
►
Let's go see what Passion of the Christ looks like.
01:49:53
◼
►
But you know what I mean?
01:49:53
◼
►
'Cause I gotta say, I might find that,
01:49:56
◼
►
it kinda goes against some of my values
01:50:00
◼
►
about censorship or something,
01:50:01
◼
►
but that's what I'm asking for, you know?
01:50:03
◼
►
There are some movies I am much more likely
01:50:05
◼
►
to have my daughter watch in a hotel room
01:50:08
◼
►
because I know they've been edited down.
01:50:10
◼
►
They've taken out the really cool.
01:50:11
◼
►
We watched Highlander in a hotel room
01:50:13
◼
►
and she thought it was a riot.
01:50:14
◼
►
I would never show that to her at home, unedited.
01:50:18
◼
►
- I never thought about that, about looking for a hotel edit.
01:50:22
◼
►
- I love a hotel edit.
01:50:24
◼
►
- The director's cut and then there's Hilton's cut.
01:50:27
◼
►
- Wow, this is an unusual statistical spread
01:50:31
◼
►
on Passion of the Christ.
01:50:32
◼
►
Sex and nudity, it gets a one.
01:50:34
◼
►
Profanity, it gets a one.
01:50:36
◼
►
Violence and gore, full 10.
01:50:43
◼
►
Let her dance, dance, let her dance, dance.
01:50:48
◼
►
- I've been, now I'm looking for movies
01:50:50
◼
►
that I have let Jonah see
01:50:51
◼
►
that they don't even bother to list
01:50:53
◼
►
because I don't think any-- - It would be so inappropriate.
01:50:55
◼
►
- Right, The Shining is not listed.
01:50:57
◼
►
- Oh, come on.
01:50:59
◼
►
Are you kidding me?
01:51:00
◼
►
- That I've let him see it?
01:51:04
◼
►
- I think that's the only Kubrick movie he's seen.
01:51:05
◼
►
- You're Batman.
01:51:08
◼
►
She's never seen any Kubrick.
01:51:11
◼
►
- That was recent though.
01:51:12
◼
►
That was within the last year.
01:51:13
◼
►
- Okay, yeah, well.
01:51:14
◼
►
- I think it was like last year.
01:51:15
◼
►
- You're gonna say Clockwork Orange
01:51:15
◼
►
till he's like 12 probably, right?
01:51:17
◼
►
- Yeah, Clockwork Orange is gonna have to wait.
01:51:20
◼
►
- 'Cause, you know.
01:51:21
◼
►
- But there are some things.
01:51:22
◼
►
Oh, you know what, I'm not gonna tell you.
01:51:24
◼
►
I'll tell you when we're offline.
01:51:26
◼
►
But there's a movie that she has been dying to see
01:51:29
◼
►
for like a year.
01:51:30
◼
►
And we've read some of the book.
01:51:32
◼
►
We've told, I've told her the entire story.
01:51:34
◼
►
She really wants to see "Hunger Games."
01:51:37
◼
►
And I'm like, it's, she's seven.
01:51:40
◼
►
Like that's, it just, and again,
01:51:41
◼
►
why too much personal violence?
01:51:44
◼
►
Like that, the violence in "Hunger Games,"
01:51:46
◼
►
I'm gonna tell you, I don't care.
01:51:47
◼
►
I'm a 48 year old man.
01:51:49
◼
►
I'm gonna say it, I love "The Hunger Games."
01:51:50
◼
►
I thought it was a great movie.
01:51:51
◼
►
I thought it was a lot of fun.
01:51:52
◼
►
I thought it was very well done.
01:51:53
◼
►
And I just, I really liked it.
01:51:55
◼
►
And I cannot wait.
01:51:58
◼
►
It's one of those movies like,
01:51:59
◼
►
that I'm constantly saying to her,
01:51:59
◼
►
"Oh honey, I cannot wait
01:52:01
◼
►
until you're old enough to watch this with me.
01:52:03
◼
►
Like that one, Blade Runner.
01:52:05
◼
►
What about Blade Runner?
01:52:07
◼
►
Has he seen Blade Runner?
01:52:09
◼
►
- Yeah, that's pretty-- - Let me think about that.
01:52:13
◼
►
- Huh, there's the Daryl Hannah character.
01:52:16
◼
►
- You got the eye, you got the replicants
01:52:18
◼
►
doing some pretty bad.
01:52:20
◼
►
Oh, you got Leon, you got Leon.
01:52:22
◼
►
There's some pretty bad stuff in that.
01:52:25
◼
►
- I would probably let him watch it now though.
01:52:26
◼
►
He's 11, I would probably let him watch it.
01:52:29
◼
►
- I'm worried how much did they play up
01:52:30
◼
►
that Daryl Hannah is a prostitute.
01:52:33
◼
►
- That worries you.
01:52:36
◼
►
You afraid it's gonna be imitative behavior?
01:52:38
◼
►
- Well, I don't know.
01:52:39
◼
►
I would probably-- - He's gonna wanna go out
01:52:40
◼
►
and get a skin job, if you know what I mean?
01:52:41
◼
►
- Yeah, but I would say only within like the last year or so
01:52:44
◼
►
I would say Blade Runner. - Oh, sure, sure, sure.
01:52:46
◼
►
Well, was Blade Runner rated?
01:52:47
◼
►
It must have been rated R, right?
01:52:49
◼
►
- I think it's gotta be rated R, yeah.
01:52:51
◼
►
- Some of them are amazing though, I'm telling you.
01:52:52
◼
►
There's something about '80s movies
01:52:54
◼
►
that seems completely random.
01:52:56
◼
►
Movies that in my head I think of as being,
01:52:59
◼
►
like maybe 'cause I saw them when I was a young teenager.
01:53:02
◼
►
Like I'm so blown away,
01:53:03
◼
►
there's just be boobs out of nowhere in the movie.
01:53:05
◼
►
You're like, "Whoa, where did that come from?"
01:53:07
◼
►
- We just watched over Christmas,
01:53:09
◼
►
we watched "Weekend at Bernie's" and...
01:53:13
◼
►
- How'd that go over?
01:53:15
◼
►
- He loved it, he absolutely loved it.
01:53:18
◼
►
But there were a couple of surprising '80s sort of boobies.
01:53:22
◼
►
- Yeah. - Yeah.
01:53:23
◼
►
I don't know how else to describe it.
01:53:25
◼
►
- Well, and the thing was that it was so egregious.
01:53:27
◼
►
I think a lot of the movies I'm thinking of,
01:53:29
◼
►
It was by the time you had theatrical,
01:53:33
◼
►
VHS or beta cable,
01:53:37
◼
►
and certainly get it ready for distribution on TV.
01:53:40
◼
►
And if you think about something like Caddyshack,
01:53:42
◼
►
or you think about, Caddyshack obviously way too much.
01:53:44
◼
►
But, can't wait till I can watch that with her.
01:53:47
◼
►
But, oh my God, I love it so much.
01:53:49
◼
►
- We thought about it.
01:53:50
◼
►
We thought about it and then we were like running it
01:53:51
◼
►
through our heads and there's so much of it that's good.
01:53:54
◼
►
But then, you know, like--
01:53:55
◼
►
- He'll appreciate it more later.
01:53:56
◼
►
I showed her some scenes.
01:53:57
◼
►
showed her Carl finding the candy bar in the pool I I don't know what we're gonna
01:54:01
◼
►
have the talk about what abortion is but it's not gonna be so that waitress has a
01:54:07
◼
►
baby but wasn't gonna say about oh so so but what's funny though cuz like I think
01:54:14
◼
►
about like how like egregious and unnecessary so many of the boobies are
01:54:18
◼
►
where like you could tell they made it to be easy to cut out where it'll just
01:54:22
◼
►
be like hey it's a shot of a girl taking her shirt off me like what was that but
01:54:25
◼
►
like you had to have that in every 80s movie early 80s movie think about like
01:54:29
◼
►
stripes you know I'm these movies that are like kind of mostly okay in some
01:54:33
◼
►
ways but then are like super inappropriate in other ways but yeah
01:54:37
◼
►
there's got to be this had to be like a scene where there were 23 year old like
01:54:42
◼
►
having a petrified at a party I heard yeah with feathered hair and they're
01:54:45
◼
►
either getting a hose down or having a pillow fight well an awful lot of
01:54:54
◼
►
actresses got hosed down or suds up in in completely mainstream Hollywood
01:55:00
◼
►
movies in the 1980s let's have a car wash to save the orphanage but there's
01:55:06
◼
►
no orphanage in the plot sponges are soft right so what are we gonna tell
01:55:10
◼
►
people how do we help people with this John there are new parents out there
01:55:13
◼
►
people are having babies like crazy people how do we help people with this I
01:55:19
◼
►
don't know I feel like you I feel like you got to have faith in your kid I feel
01:55:23
◼
►
like because I don't know I just remember when I was a kid when I was not allowed to watch
01:55:28
◼
►
certain movies it was a constant source of frustration for me.
01:55:31
◼
►
And you felt didn't you feel like a pariah?
01:55:33
◼
►
I did and we had a neighborhood movie theater and it was so great I think I had to have talked about
01:55:41
◼
►
this on the show at some point but it's probably years ago probably with like Dan but and it was
01:55:45
◼
►
I didn't even have to cross the street it was cata corner like a like up and around the block from my
01:55:50
◼
►
my parents' house.
01:55:51
◼
►
So I didn't even have to cross the street.
01:55:53
◼
►
And it was called The Majestic.
01:55:55
◼
►
And it was an old time vaudeville theater
01:55:58
◼
►
that at some point in the 40s or 50s
01:56:00
◼
►
was turned into a movie theater.
01:56:02
◼
►
And it was connected to the fire company.
01:56:06
◼
►
So half the building was fire trucks,
01:56:07
◼
►
the other half was a movie theater.
01:56:09
◼
►
And it was just right out of central casting
01:56:12
◼
►
of old time matinee movie theater.
01:56:15
◼
►
Velvet seats.
01:56:19
◼
►
a balcony, a big balcony, like you would go around the side. And it was run by a family.
01:56:26
◼
►
The guy who owned it was Mr. Dieter. Dieter or Dietrich? Dieter, I think. And he was probably
01:56:32
◼
►
around 50. And his dad was the projectionist and the ticket taker at the front door. His
01:56:38
◼
►
dad, he must have been 75. But to our eyes as like eight, nine year olds, he was ancient.
01:56:44
◼
►
was older than God. He was older than the Earth. And then the kids, his ne'er-do-well
01:56:53
◼
►
teenage son would sometimes be working, and it was such a great place. Oh my God.
01:56:57
◼
►
Oh, could you sometimes get away with it?
01:57:00
◼
►
Well, what you could sometimes get away with is if the kid was behind... They had great popcorn,
01:57:04
◼
►
like the best popcorn in the universe. And they had... Because it was like a little movie theater,
01:57:11
◼
►
They never got movies when they were new they got movies right after they were new so like
01:57:15
◼
►
Empire Strikes Back would come out and it would play for three months at the multiplex
01:57:20
◼
►
All right, and then the majestic would get it for like, you know, however many weeks they wanted
01:57:25
◼
►
And they would sometimes have like two movies at the same time even though it was just you know
01:57:31
◼
►
It wasn't a multiplex one screen
01:57:32
◼
►
But like in the afternoon they might show like a kids movie like Peter Pan and then at nighttime
01:57:37
◼
►
There was a you know, John Travolta movie or something, right? I don't know
01:57:40
◼
►
And they would also show rock movies like concert films from like the
01:57:46
◼
►
movies kind of thing. Yeah like though I like just concert movies of like the
01:57:50
◼
►
Stones and Led Zeppelin and stuff like that my parents always get mad because
01:57:53
◼
►
when they showed those like our backyard would get trashed. Kids
01:57:57
◼
►
coming out of movie theater were like cut through like and and you know leave
01:58:01
◼
►
beer cans and stuff but it was such a great place but I remember we used to go
01:58:05
◼
►
as a kid, any Saturday, where it was if it was winter, or if it
01:58:10
◼
►
was rainy, or whatever, we would just go to the majestic, we
01:58:13
◼
►
would just go there because it was like $1 $1 matinee, your
01:58:15
◼
►
parent, your mom wouldn't mind giving you the money, you'd be
01:58:18
◼
►
out of their hair. But every once in a while, I remember one
01:58:20
◼
►
time specifically, I wasn't allowed to all my friends were
01:58:22
◼
►
going. And they didn't give it like one thing about Mr. Dieters,
01:58:25
◼
►
he didn't give two shits. How old you are, if you had your
01:58:27
◼
►
dollar, you could go see. So that the Saturday matinee was
01:58:31
◼
►
Kujo. This is my this whole story is my saying I was not
01:58:34
◼
►
allowed my mom checked and I knew she wouldn't let me see it so I hope I just
01:58:38
◼
►
said can I go to the Majestic and she said what's playing I said I don't know
01:58:41
◼
►
she goes well let me look and she looks you know in the newspaper of course and
01:58:46
◼
►
there it is Kujo rated R and now she could tell you if it well I don't know I
01:58:51
◼
►
can't remember if I got because you would just sometimes go and see what's
01:58:53
◼
►
there yeah and we would often go if they had the same movie two weeks in a row
01:58:57
◼
►
we'd go see it twice in a row and if we if we sat in the balcony last time we'll
01:59:01
◼
►
Sit up in the front row this time and you know half the time on the balcony
01:59:04
◼
►
We would just sit up there and throw popcorn on teenagers who were making out down below, you know in the back
01:59:09
◼
►
They're like little kids up in the front row little kids on the balcony and then like teenagers making out and like the back row
01:59:16
◼
►
We would like try to throw popcorn on them. Oh
01:59:18
◼
►
The great thing they had video games in the lobby, you know coin up
01:59:23
◼
►
It's like a little mini arcade in the lobby and you could play them
01:59:27
◼
►
And so I said that the old man's dad was the projectionist
01:59:30
◼
►
where the projection booth was up in the balcony
01:59:32
◼
►
and it took him, I swear, no joke,
01:59:34
◼
►
like five minutes to walk up the steps.
01:59:37
◼
►
Like he was seriously old.
01:59:39
◼
►
And he was so old that he would take the steps
01:59:41
◼
►
like left foot and then the right foot
01:59:43
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would be in the same step.
01:59:44
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- Oh no. - Left foot, right foot.
01:59:46
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So it was like a last call for video games.
01:59:48
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Like when his dad started going up the steps,
01:59:51
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you knew you had time for,
01:59:52
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you could still get one more game in.
01:59:54
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Without missing it.
01:59:56
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What a place but I couldn't get into I couldn't get in to see Kujo and I remember Blue Lagoon
02:00:01
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I remember missing out on the blue blue
02:00:03
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I remember seeing that on cable Oh brother
02:00:06
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But all my friends my friends parents just did my they just didn't check. I think I don't think anybody's I
02:00:12
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Was probably around eight or nine at the time
02:00:14
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I don't think anybody in their right mind would let their eight or nine year old see Kujo
02:00:17
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But here's the thing too, I remember thinking I would be fine
02:00:22
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I was not I've never once was upset by a movie in my entire life as a kid. I was you know, I think
02:00:28
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Pretty naturally mature I could have I and my friend so cujo and they were fine. Yeah. Yeah, yeah
02:00:35
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Including my friend Dave who is the kid who got freaked out by Raiders of the Lost Ark
02:00:40
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He went to see cujo thought it was a cool movie. Yeah, if you know what you're in for, you know, yeah
02:00:47
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I never tell my Blade Runner story. No, I hung out with older kids a lot of the time and I went back
02:00:53
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From Florida to visit my friends in Ohio
02:00:55
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Whatever that summer was some Blade Runner was out and they were all older than me and they could pass and I looked like I
02:01:01
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Was four. Oh, I'm just never forget we walk up there and they buy their tickets and my hand of God
02:01:07
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I walked up to the counter. I think I was holding an unlit cigarette
02:01:10
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Maybe they'd given me I woke up to the counter and I go one adult for Blade Runner
02:01:15
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How old are you I was 13 and like really one adult
02:01:26
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Did you ever do that as a teenager like like in your in your like teenage years
02:01:32
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Did you ever do the thing where you'd buy a ticket for one that you know?
02:01:36
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They'd sell you and then try to sneak in - I never that never occurred to me. It's such that's such a smart trick
02:01:42
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I was scared to do anything. I was always scared to buy beer
02:01:44
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beer I was scared to go to R-rated movies I was just I was so I was such a
02:01:48
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good kid I you know like a good kid like I did not want to disappoint anybody in
02:01:53
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authority I was scared I was scared no I was a scammer like the rise of the
02:01:59
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multiplex and then like once I was old enough those things that the whole point
02:02:03
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is those things make money because they're so understaffed they got like
02:02:06
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one kid that walks around and sweeps up popcorn once they know what he's paying
02:02:08
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the attention to who's going in those theaters you go and sit somewhere near
02:02:11
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an adult, you're good to go. Yeah, like, I think a bunch of
02:02:15
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Schwarzenegger's 80s movies were r rated. Oh, yeah. You know, it
02:02:20
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was all those. It's just always shooting people up and blowing
02:02:23
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things up. But we've got, you know, we would just go and buy
02:02:25
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tickets for, I don't know, whatever we thought we could get
02:02:27
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into. And you can always sneak in there was just always one guy,
02:02:30
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like, who would make sure you had a ticket. There is no money
02:02:33
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in pursuing that. No, I mean, there's money in running and
02:02:36
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selling, you know, goobers and popcorn. There's no money in
02:02:40
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monitoring those theaters I remember one time my friend Ethan and I went to a
02:02:44
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multiplex to I forget was there girls involved there might have it might it
02:02:51
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wasn't a date because I wasn't you know wasn't lucky enough to have dates but it
02:02:55
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might have been like us it was like a teenage situation over there were girls
02:02:58
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involved and so I could kind of pretend like maybe it would be a day and we
02:03:03
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wanted to see an r-rated movie but we were it was we weren't like 13 anymore
02:03:07
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We were maybe more like 15 or 16 and so we didn't think it'd be a problem
02:03:11
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And we asked for the R-rated movie and she said no, you know
02:03:16
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Do you have ID and we're like no and she was and she's like a 17 and we're like, of course
02:03:20
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And she's like no you're not and then we're like well give us two tickets for you know
02:03:25
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Whatever it was PG and she's like no. Oh no shit and with my friend Ethan's brother had
02:03:31
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Had driven us and dropped us off nice enough. He was like two or three years older
02:03:36
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So he was like 17 or 18 and he hadn't gone yet. He was still was there
02:03:40
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You know, we ran and got him and he he bought us our ticket. Oh, you're kidding
02:03:44
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Yeah, he bought us to it, but it was like but I still don't know how that got around
02:03:47
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I have no I have no respect for people who buy beer for underage kids
02:03:51
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But people who buy I said the guy who drinks a lot but but but somebody buying movie tickets for kids. That's pretty cool
02:03:57
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Yeah, but I don't know why she fell for that. She wouldn't fall for our will just buy the PG but she somehow fell for
02:04:05
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Apparently once there's a 17 year old involved you can get anybody in there show the ID they they can't say anything. That's the law, right?
02:04:12
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One adult I think we told her do that he was our parent
02:04:19
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Two years old walking in my dad holding a finger under your nose
02:04:23
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My dad says it's okay
02:04:27
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Blade Runner, I'll tell you what Blade Runner is a damn borderline movie for 10 10 years 11 year
02:04:33
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You know, there's again that that Hunger Games Die Hard
02:04:38
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There's so many movies where I'm like you so can't see this yet, but I really I cannot wait so my kid can see Die Hard
02:04:43
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Yeah, I remember
02:04:45
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My was not allowed to read
02:04:48
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The Catcher in the Rye and I don't even know why I wanted to at some point
02:04:53
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I'd you know, I had become a you know, a fairly
02:04:56
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avid reader and
02:04:59
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My mom, you know, definitely my mom encouraged it and you know would would I could buy books?
02:05:05
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We get books at library and at some point
02:05:07
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I wanted to read to catch her in the ride because I'd heard it was a cool book or whatever and
02:05:10
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She thought about I could tell she was really thoughtful and she was like, you know, it's a great book
02:05:14
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I can't wait for you to read it, but you're not you're not old enough yet and
02:05:17
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And I would ask like every six months. Can I read catch her?
02:05:21
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I can't read catch and right and eventually she let me and I forget I don't know how old I was but you know
02:05:25
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maybe like 12 or 13 and I read it and
02:05:29
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I was expecting it because it had been so set up by her not allowing me to be like Lolita or something
02:05:34
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Yeah, I thought it was gonna be like and this is gonna be some great stuff and I just remember being bored to tears
02:05:39
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I was like what the hell it's just a kid walking around. I appreciated that both so much more when I got older
02:05:44
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Oh, yeah, you know what and I wish that's what my mom had said to me
02:05:47
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I wish she hadn't made she was thinking too much about some of the content and some of the ideas and I really really
02:05:53
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fundamentally it was more like
02:05:55
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You're you you shouldn't bother reading it now. You won't appreciate it, right? Okay. I was just the trade-off
02:06:01
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That's kind of the trade-off we were talking about. It's a truly great book, but you're not ready for it yet
02:06:05
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Well, I'll give you and I'll tell you where I'm going with this is
02:06:08
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Movie wise it's actually rated G content wise. It's not that bad
02:06:13
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but I won't let Jonas watch 2001 right because I
02:06:18
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Strongly suspect he'll be bored to tears and I don't want him to get it
02:06:21
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his head that this movie is born. Or like or I mean watching the uh the ape stuff at the beginning
02:06:27
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going like oh that is so fake. I wonder if he would think it's fake some of it some of the back
02:06:32
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the the the staging looks fake I think the apes themselves are still I think they stand up.
02:06:36
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They look better than you'd expect that's that's for sure but no I'm with you that would be
02:06:39
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something that's kind of like me with James Bond and her like I was amazed that she could
02:06:43
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tolerate the pacing to watch Goldfinger like three times now it's it's crazy.
02:06:48
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There really is a scene in goldfinger where they just sit on a porch and drink mentula
02:06:52
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Just it goes on and on and then they have some discussions about whether they should go in or let james bond
02:06:57
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Keep doing his thing. James bond's in the cell. He's out of the cell
02:07:00
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He's in that he's in the he's in the world's craziest. He's hiding under the world's craziest rec room. My god
02:07:05
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What's that guy's name? Ken kurtis. What's the guy's name? Ken adams. Oh my god that that room
02:07:11
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I love that room so much
02:07:14
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And every time we watch it, when Goldfinger leaves to go make his deal with the guy who wants his money back,
02:07:19
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I always do the same stupid joke. I go, "Hey, we wanted to play billiards!"
02:07:23
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She laughs a little.
02:07:25
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Hey, I should go. I gotta try to get to this dry cleaner by six.
02:07:28
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What are we gonna do to help people here? I mean, your mileage may vary. What do we say?
02:07:32
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What do we say? I don't care about the people who think we're nuts, but like,
02:07:35
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what would you say as a good piece of advice? I would say one is, if it's a movie you consider
02:07:40
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a classic, you think your kid is almost ready for, watch it yourself.
02:07:43
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with them not there yeah and also I would not be afraid to fast over yeah
02:07:49
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yeah pass pass forward fast over yeah yeah you got to watch it with them yeah
02:07:55
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yeah that's what I think still gonna hold off on Die Hard though I think we
02:07:59
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just got into Die Hard this year we have this was the first year so that
02:08:03
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beautiful Christmas movie 10 10 years that's just about a perfect movie yeah I
02:08:08
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don't know I don't know why I had it filed away as something he could watch
02:08:11
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when he was 10 yeah yeah well thanks thanks for having me on man it's always
02:08:15
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a pleasure oh it is we should just do this every week and not put it out no
02:08:21
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wouldn't it be good for us to be good for us I think we should start our own
02:08:24
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version of this kids in mind and we'll do our own we'll do our own version
02:08:28
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we're not gonna count the F words yeah just tell you if they swear no no no
02:08:31
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we'll make it look no ours is our our sites gonna be called rats in the lobby
02:08:34
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and we're just gonna let you know if you're if your kids are real punk or
02:08:36
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pussy just skip it skip it oh god that's the end that's it