169: My Fingers Are Still Moving
00:00:00
◼
►
I don't think we let ourselves just be idiots often enough.
00:00:04
◼
►
I feel like that's our core competency.
00:00:07
◼
►
- So I was using my iPhone today.
00:00:12
◼
►
I was sitting at, I would guess, 30% battery life.
00:00:16
◼
►
I am aware that you can turn on battery percentage.
00:00:19
◼
►
I think that is the mark of a lunatic
00:00:22
◼
►
because all that does is stress me out when it's on.
00:00:25
◼
►
I'd rather not know.
00:00:26
◼
►
So anyway, so I was sitting at,
00:00:28
◼
►
I would guess about a third battery life. And I go to record a video of Declan. We were
00:00:33
◼
►
walking around outside. And as I'm recording the video, it's not that I was framing it,
00:00:39
◼
►
I'm actively recording the video. All of a sudden the phone turns off. Okay. That in
00:00:44
◼
►
and of itself is unfortunately common, but that was weird. But okay, so I go to turn
00:00:48
◼
►
the phone back on.
00:00:49
◼
►
Wait, wait, wait. That's common?
00:00:51
◼
►
Well, common enough that we're… I don't want to say functional high ground, but it
00:00:56
◼
►
It felt like a functional high ground sort of occurrence.
00:00:58
◼
►
Like, oh, that was weird, but I'm sure once it reboots
00:01:02
◼
►
itself, everything will be fine.
00:01:03
◼
►
- Okay, your Windows recency is showing.
00:01:05
◼
►
Like, that is not acceptable behavior.
00:01:09
◼
►
That is not normal.
00:01:10
◼
►
- Yeah, well, before the show, we were just talking about
00:01:13
◼
►
how you were rebooting your iMac fixed everything,
00:01:15
◼
►
but that's neither here nor there.
00:01:17
◼
►
- Yeah, I didn't say that was right either.
00:01:19
◼
►
- So, I go to start the phone back up, and it tells me,
00:01:23
◼
►
"No, I won't because your battery's dead."
00:01:27
◼
►
You know what I'm talking about?
00:01:27
◼
►
Like the, "I will not start until you plug it in."
00:01:30
◼
►
- Yeah, like, yeah, the little like,
00:01:31
◼
►
battery with the red line and black screen, yeah.
00:01:33
◼
►
- Yeah, yeah, so I'm like, "That's weird, I was just at 30%."
00:01:36
◼
►
So I do the like, "Hold both buttons
00:01:39
◼
►
"until it force restarts itself" dance,
00:01:42
◼
►
and it starts back up, and I'm back at 30%.
00:01:44
◼
►
Okay, that was really weird, but I'll roll with it.
00:01:47
◼
►
And then I go to record a video again,
00:01:50
◼
►
same exact thing happened.
00:01:52
◼
►
except this time it didn't want to turn itself back on.
00:01:54
◼
►
- Yeah, your battery is toast.
00:01:56
◼
►
I've heard of this.
00:01:56
◼
►
A lot of people have had this problem
00:01:57
◼
►
with many different models of iPhone in the past
00:02:00
◼
►
that exactly the same symptoms.
00:02:02
◼
►
You get your battery down to something that's below half,
00:02:05
◼
►
but not really, really low.
00:02:07
◼
►
And then it's just like, nope, no battery for you.
00:02:10
◼
►
And the same thing, like sometimes it'll come back like,
00:02:11
◼
►
oh, here I am again, 20%.
00:02:13
◼
►
You gotta take that in.
00:02:14
◼
►
That is a very common symptom.
00:02:16
◼
►
And I don't know what it is.
00:02:17
◼
►
It could just be a bad battery
00:02:18
◼
►
that just can't maintain the voltage.
00:02:20
◼
►
And once it gets to blow a certain level,
00:02:21
◼
►
the phone is just like, "Yeah, so much for that." But then you bring it back and it's
00:02:24
◼
►
like, "Oh, I can maintain the voltage now. Oh, not really. I can't." You just got to
00:02:27
◼
►
bring it in. Don't bother. Like some people, John Roderick, who lived with this for like
00:02:32
◼
►
a year or more and accepted as just like, "This darn phone." It's like, that's like
00:02:37
◼
►
Marco said, that's not the way it's supposed to work. You have to bring that in. Tell them
00:02:41
◼
►
the symptoms. I'm sure they've heard it a million times before because this is a common
00:02:45
◼
►
There is one exception though that is also almost exactly the same behavior you get during
00:02:49
◼
►
a hot or cold thermal shutdown?
00:02:51
◼
►
Yeah, yeah, obviously temperature stuff,
00:02:53
◼
►
but I'm assuming it's spring.
00:02:54
◼
►
It's like it's not too hot, not too cold.
00:02:55
◼
►
I assume that you hadn't left it in the sun
00:02:57
◼
►
on the dashboard of your car before using it.
00:02:59
◼
►
No, we had just gone for a walk, about a mile and a half walk.
00:03:02
◼
►
It was in my jeans pocket.
00:03:05
◼
►
There was no-- I mean, it's humid out
00:03:08
◼
►
because it's been raining for the last year.
00:03:10
◼
►
But no, there was nothing environmental
00:03:13
◼
►
that should have caused it.
00:03:14
◼
►
What I've done is I've left it plugged in
00:03:16
◼
►
and have planned to leave it plugged in all night,
00:03:19
◼
►
just to see, this is before we had this conversation,
00:03:23
◼
►
but I thought, well, maybe it's just like not calibrated
00:03:25
◼
►
or something like that, so I'll just,
00:03:27
◼
►
I'll leave it plugged in all night long,
00:03:28
◼
►
I mean, I always leave it plugged in all night long,
00:03:30
◼
►
but I'll just, I'll be really diligent
00:03:32
◼
►
about leaving it plugged in,
00:03:33
◼
►
and we'll see if that changes it,
00:03:34
◼
►
but it sounds like I'm making a trip to the Genius Bar.
00:03:37
◼
►
Wee! - Typical Windows,
00:03:39
◼
►
blame yourself, just defrag at first.
00:03:41
◼
►
No, you didn't update your Windows update virus definitions.
00:03:45
◼
►
It was your fault, it's totally your fault.
00:03:47
◼
►
- But aren't you happy now?
00:03:48
◼
►
Like if I had something like this happen,
00:03:49
◼
►
especially on a device that I've had for a while,
00:03:51
◼
►
but like, oh yes, new battery.
00:03:53
◼
►
Your battery's getting old anyway.
00:03:56
◼
►
How many cycles has it been through?
00:03:57
◼
►
You're gonna get a fresh new battery,
00:03:58
◼
►
assuming you're still under warranty.
00:04:00
◼
►
- Well, I mean, it's a 6S, so yeah,
00:04:03
◼
►
I'm still under warranty.
00:04:04
◼
►
But what that also means is I gotta go to the Genius Bar.
00:04:07
◼
►
I've gotta do the backup dance.
00:04:08
◼
►
I've gotta convince them that this is an actual issue
00:04:11
◼
►
that isn't my fault, et cetera, et cetera.
00:04:14
◼
►
- I guess I'm sure they're well versed
00:04:16
◼
►
on this exact problem and have a procedure
00:04:18
◼
►
and you are not the first person to tell them
00:04:19
◼
►
is it'll be fine.
00:04:20
◼
►
- I will say though, it really,
00:04:23
◼
►
when I first saw this doing thermal shutdown,
00:04:26
◼
►
it was on Tiff's phone this past winter
00:04:29
◼
►
when she was trying to take videos of our kid
00:04:31
◼
►
playing in the snow in like the high 20s or low 30s
00:04:35
◼
►
in Fahrenheit.
00:04:36
◼
►
And the phone, after a couple seconds of shooting video,
00:04:39
◼
►
it just kept shutting down on her.
00:04:40
◼
►
And we thought it was broken.
00:04:42
◼
►
And I was like, oh, we gotta bring it in.
00:04:44
◼
►
And then once we came inside,
00:04:46
◼
►
and the problem could never be reproduced
00:04:48
◼
►
at room temperature, and we were like, oh.
00:04:50
◼
►
And I looked up and I figured out
00:04:52
◼
►
that's actually expected behavior that,
00:04:55
◼
►
I guess all those videos you see in Apple commercials,
00:04:57
◼
►
like the shot on iPhone where people are on ski vacations,
00:05:00
◼
►
I guess they're taking really short shots.
00:05:02
◼
►
- No, you actually have to keep the phone,
00:05:04
◼
►
you can't keep the phone in a pocket
00:05:05
◼
►
that's essentially outdoors.
00:05:07
◼
►
If your pockets are, if your pockets get cold,
00:05:10
◼
►
in other words, you have to have it in a pocket
00:05:11
◼
►
that's sort of the inside of the body heat part of it,
00:05:14
◼
►
because that's all there really is.
00:05:15
◼
►
as if your phone freezes solid within 20 seconds. It's already frozen when it's in your pocket,
00:05:19
◼
►
and you take it out and it just goes that, you know, a little extra bit. So you really have to
00:05:23
◼
►
either keep it inside your glove or someplace close to your body so that the phone stays
00:05:28
◼
►
at more or less body or room temperature. Then you get a long time before it freezes solid into
00:05:32
◼
►
a brick of inert lithium-ion battery. Or you get one of those, you know, those little hand warmer
00:05:39
◼
►
thingies, you know, the little shaky packets with the chemical stuff that they give off heat. You
00:05:43
◼
►
You could, someone should sell a case like that.
00:05:45
◼
►
You've already got the big lump for the battery case
00:05:46
◼
►
to have by the heat case for the winter.
00:05:48
◼
►
- Then it would get hot thermal shut down.
00:05:50
◼
►
- Well, it doesn't, they don't get that hot.
00:05:52
◼
►
Those things are, you know.
00:05:53
◼
►
- So the hand warmer things are the things
00:05:55
◼
►
that people who live in ridiculous climates use, right?
00:05:58
◼
►
So you guys use that all the time?
00:05:59
◼
►
- Skiers use it.
00:06:00
◼
►
Oh, the best is, I don't remember,
00:06:02
◼
►
someone in the chat room would remember this.
00:06:03
◼
►
Before the age of the chemical packets
00:06:05
◼
►
that you would put in your pocket,
00:06:06
◼
►
that you know, you'd start a reaction
00:06:07
◼
►
and it would get warm, not hot, but you know, warm.
00:06:09
◼
►
Like they're not burning your hands
00:06:10
◼
►
'cause they'd have lawsuits.
00:06:12
◼
►
They had these things that were kind of like metal clamshell things that had inside them
00:06:17
◼
►
essentially burning embers.
00:06:19
◼
►
Like not open flames, but burning embers to give off heat.
00:06:23
◼
►
It sounds like the most dangerous thing you could possibly imagine.
00:06:27
◼
►
And that was the old tech.
00:06:29
◼
►
And that was much worse.
00:06:30
◼
►
So the new stuff is considerably safer and more civilized.
00:06:35
◼
►
Was it like, was it airtight sealed in there?
00:06:37
◼
►
Or how did that...
00:06:38
◼
►
My recollection was that it was like a clamshell.
00:06:40
◼
►
or look more kind of like a compact or a snuff box or something and the little burning ember
00:06:44
◼
►
things you could get at by opening and closing it that way, but you'd use it closed and
00:06:47
◼
►
just had a metal outside that would radiate the heat.
00:06:50
◼
►
It sounds like some kind of crazy contraption from your drug days, Jon.
00:06:54
◼
►
Yeah, my drug days, right?
00:06:56
◼
►
This is the beginning of the ad.
00:06:58
◼
►
Our first sponsor this week is Fracture.
00:07:00
◼
►
Fracture prints photos in vivid color directly onto glass.
00:07:05
◼
►
These colors pop like you won't believe and it comes in a solid backing.
00:07:09
◼
►
It's made of this thin foam board behind the glass layer.
00:07:12
◼
►
So it's very, very strong, but yet also very lightweight.
00:07:15
◼
►
So you don't have to worry about this giant pane of glass
00:07:18
◼
►
hanging on your wall, pulling the wall hanger out,
00:07:21
◼
►
'cause they're very light for their size.
00:07:23
◼
►
And the front of them is just this thin piece of glass
00:07:25
◼
►
with the photo printed on the back so it shines through.
00:07:28
◼
►
And it just looks fantastic.
00:07:30
◼
►
This is the best way to get photos printed
00:07:32
◼
►
and hang them up or put on a desk
00:07:33
◼
►
or send them to people for gifts or whatever else.
00:07:36
◼
►
I have these all over my office.
00:07:38
◼
►
friends use them, other podcasters I know use them themselves
00:07:41
◼
►
'cause they sponsored their shows first
00:07:42
◼
►
and they found them out and they're just so good.
00:07:45
◼
►
And we always get compliments on our Fracture prints
00:07:47
◼
►
whenever people are at our house.
00:07:49
◼
►
I mean, I probably, I have something like, let's see,
00:07:52
◼
►
seven of them around the office right now?
00:07:54
◼
►
They're everywhere and I've sent probably five or six more
00:07:57
◼
►
as gifts, they're just great.
00:07:59
◼
►
Go to fractureme.com to see for yourself.
00:08:01
◼
►
The prices are very reasonable on these
00:08:04
◼
►
and you can use code ATP10
00:08:06
◼
►
to get an additional 10% off their regular prices.
00:08:09
◼
►
Really, if you have some photos to print,
00:08:11
◼
►
and honestly, you should be printing photos.
00:08:13
◼
►
Because these days, you post photos on Facebook
00:08:16
◼
►
or Instagram, if you can find it on Instagram anymore
00:08:18
◼
►
with that crazy icon, but you post photos
00:08:19
◼
►
on Facebook or Instagram or whatever else,
00:08:21
◼
►
and you see them for like a day,
00:08:22
◼
►
and then they're just buried in the feed.
00:08:25
◼
►
So with Fracture, you can have those photos live longer,
00:08:29
◼
►
and you can give them as gifts,
00:08:30
◼
►
you can have them kind of like, you know,
00:08:32
◼
►
elevated to a more prominent place in your house
00:08:36
◼
►
and your vision and your life.
00:08:38
◼
►
It's just a great way to remember great photos
00:08:39
◼
►
and to get them as gifts as well.
00:08:41
◼
►
So check it out today.
00:08:43
◼
►
Go to fractureme.com.
00:08:45
◼
►
This is run by fine people in Gainesville, Florida.
00:08:47
◼
►
Everything's hand checked for quality by real people.
00:08:49
◼
►
So you always get good stuff.
00:08:51
◼
►
I've never had one break.
00:08:52
◼
►
I've never heard of one breaking during shipping.
00:08:54
◼
►
They're really good, no worries here.
00:08:56
◼
►
I use them, recommend them, they're awesome.
00:08:57
◼
►
Fractureme.com, code ATP10 to save 10%.
00:09:01
◼
►
Thanks a lot.
00:09:02
◼
►
This is the end of the ad.
00:09:03
◼
►
- Anonymous has written in and said,
00:09:05
◼
►
"Can you please address the business model behind Tesla's offering to 'unlock' physical
00:09:11
◼
►
features already in the car, like battery capacity otherwise locked down?
00:09:15
◼
►
It seems worrisome that an in-app purchase strategy is spilling over into hardware, not
00:09:19
◼
►
just software updates like Autopilot."
00:09:22
◼
►
What this is about is the Tesla Model S, the 70 kilowatt hour.
00:09:27
◼
►
I couldn't remember what the 70 stood for.
00:09:30
◼
►
Anyway, for the 70, you can pay $3,250 to unlock another five kilowatt hours.
00:09:39
◼
►
So you can pay $3,250 for someone to flip an electronic switch.
00:09:46
◼
►
I don't know about that, man.
00:09:48
◼
►
That just seems a little weird to me.
00:09:50
◼
►
Like, on the one side, they are indeed making the car better, so shouldn't you pay for that?
00:09:55
◼
►
But on the other side, they make it better in so many other ways, and you don't have
00:09:58
◼
►
to pay for that.
00:09:59
◼
►
Is this something that costs money?
00:10:01
◼
►
- The joke I made on Twitter about this was,
00:10:03
◼
►
it's like in-app purchase where they ship you the app
00:10:05
◼
►
that has the code for the features
00:10:07
◼
►
that are currently locked.
00:10:08
◼
►
And by doing in-app purchase,
00:10:09
◼
►
all they do is flip a bit that enables that feature.
00:10:12
◼
►
In other words, you got, just like when you get the car,
00:10:14
◼
►
the car comes with this extra battery,
00:10:17
◼
►
but it's not enabled.
00:10:18
◼
►
Well, you get this app,
00:10:18
◼
►
the app comes with this extra functionality,
00:10:20
◼
►
but it's not enabled.
00:10:21
◼
►
And that was mostly me being snarky
00:10:23
◼
►
because of course the difference is
00:10:25
◼
►
that it doesn't cost money
00:10:26
◼
►
to manufacture the additional functionality,
00:10:28
◼
►
Like copying bits is essentially free.
00:10:31
◼
►
Whereas someone paid to manufacture and assemble
00:10:35
◼
►
the parts of your car that they're giving to you
00:10:39
◼
►
in a disabled state.
00:10:41
◼
►
So you actually are receiving like,
00:10:44
◼
►
that's part of the package, it's a physical good.
00:10:48
◼
►
It costs every time they do that,
00:10:49
◼
►
whatever it is, they put that extra bit of battery in.
00:10:52
◼
►
That's a real physical item.
00:10:55
◼
►
It's not just a simple copying of bits.
00:10:57
◼
►
Now, I don't know if this makes this good from a business standpoint in terms of do
00:11:01
◼
►
you feel better or worse about Tesla as a company in light of this?
00:11:04
◼
►
Maybe you feel better because it's like your car magically got better, but maybe you feel
00:11:07
◼
►
worse and that you understand you paid to manufacture, assemble this stuff and then
00:11:13
◼
►
you give it to me, but you intentionally turn it off.
00:11:15
◼
►
It's like you're making my car worse on purpose and then ransoming it that last little bit.
00:11:20
◼
►
Unless I'm totally misunderstanding what they're actually doing with this bit flipping, but
00:11:25
◼
►
if it is actually a physical thing that they are paying to create and then giving to you
00:11:30
◼
►
in a shutoff state to try to ransom more money from you later, it doesn't give me a particularly
00:11:34
◼
►
good feeling about the company or the car.
00:11:37
◼
►
- It's definitely a weird thing. And yeah, I agree that it's probably not a way to win
00:11:44
◼
►
customer satisfaction. People will feel ripped off by that. Like people who own the 70D and
00:11:52
◼
►
then learn that actually you have 75 kilowatt capacity physically, but we only shipped it
00:11:58
◼
►
to 70, and then if you want you can pay $3,000 to unlock it. I can totally see why the people
00:12:05
◼
►
who own those 70Ds are like, "That's kind of BS-y. That's a little bit BS-y." But,
00:12:12
◼
►
you know, Tesla, it's a weird company at a weird stage in its life doing weird things,
00:12:17
◼
►
and most of those things are, I think, overall for the better.
00:12:21
◼
►
With the Model S, keep in mind that the Model S is sold with a pretty healthy profit margin,
00:12:26
◼
►
from what I understand, and the main reason is to basically fund the company's further
00:12:31
◼
►
development to do things like the Model 3.
00:12:33
◼
►
Because if you look at what's included in the Model S, and the starting price of whatever
00:12:38
◼
►
it is, like $70,000, whatever the starting price of the Model S is, and then you look
00:12:43
◼
►
at the Model 3 with the starting price of $35,000.
00:12:47
◼
►
And we already know some of the things that will be included and won't be included in
00:12:50
◼
►
And it seems kind of crazy if you try to estimate, well roughly how big of a battery is there
00:12:55
◼
►
in the Model 3?
00:12:56
◼
►
Roughly how big of a battery is there in the Model S?
00:12:59
◼
►
How can they possibly cut the cost of the car in half and sell the Model 3 with so much
00:13:06
◼
►
of what's also in the Model S?
00:13:09
◼
►
And the answer is that their costs aren't being cut in half, just the Model S has a
00:13:14
◼
►
nice fat profit margin and the Model 3 won't.
00:13:17
◼
►
So what you're paying for with the Model S today is not just like cost of the components
00:13:22
◼
►
plus 20%, you know, you're paying a premium for it because it is a brand new product.
00:13:27
◼
►
You're paying kind of like the early adopter premium on it.
00:13:30
◼
►
It has high profits now.
00:13:32
◼
►
In the long run, it will have lower profit margins in all likelihood because competition
00:13:36
◼
►
will come in and push some of these prices down.
00:13:38
◼
►
And as things mature, then the cost will also go down.
00:13:41
◼
►
But the role of the Model S is basically
00:13:44
◼
►
to generate lots of profit for Tesla to make the Model 3.
00:13:47
◼
►
So from that perspective, I can see why they do things
00:13:50
◼
►
like this, because you know that that additional battery
00:13:53
◼
►
that you're hauling around, the additional
00:13:55
◼
►
five kilowatt hour battery, did not cost Tesla
00:13:58
◼
►
$3,000 to put in there.
00:14:00
◼
►
- Or even if it did, you already paid for it.
00:14:02
◼
►
Like they sold you a car with that battery in it
00:14:04
◼
►
for the price that you paid, you know what I mean?
00:14:06
◼
►
Like that was like, someone in the chat room is saying
00:14:09
◼
►
it's the type of thing where they stopped manufacturing
00:14:11
◼
►
the 70 kilowatt, but you bought a 70 kilowatt.
00:14:13
◼
►
So it's like, well, we don't have any more 70 kilowatts,
00:14:15
◼
►
but we'll give you a 75, but flip the switch
00:14:18
◼
►
so that when you get it, it looks like the 70
00:14:20
◼
►
that you ordered.
00:14:21
◼
►
Like that was the arrangement.
00:14:22
◼
►
You order the 70, comes with 70 kilowatts,
00:14:24
◼
►
we give you a car that comes with 70 kilowatts,
00:14:26
◼
►
everyone should be happy.
00:14:27
◼
►
But again, from a feel good about the company perspective,
00:14:31
◼
►
they should do what Apple does in those cases
00:14:33
◼
►
where like if you have a really old Mac
00:14:34
◼
►
and something goes wrong with it
00:14:35
◼
►
and you're still within warranty or whatever,
00:14:37
◼
►
or Apple just feels bad, they're like,
00:14:38
◼
►
"Well, we can't fix this for you.
00:14:41
◼
►
"We can't replace the part
00:14:42
◼
►
"'cause we don't make that part anymore,
00:14:44
◼
►
"and we can't give you a new laptop of this kind
00:14:47
◼
►
"'cause we don't even make that laptop."
00:14:48
◼
►
But here you go, here's the current model of that laptop.
00:14:51
◼
►
That happens all the time at Apple,
00:14:53
◼
►
and every time it happens,
00:14:55
◼
►
it's like a miracle to the people who get it.
00:14:58
◼
►
Like, "You're giving me,
00:14:59
◼
►
"not only are you giving me a new laptop,
00:15:00
◼
►
"you're giving me a new, better laptop
00:15:02
◼
►
because you don't make my old crappy one anymore and you're not charging me any money for it
00:15:06
◼
►
because it's just like this this laptop is a total write-off it's having too many hardware
00:15:09
◼
►
failures we can't get apart that makes people love Apple so if Tesla someone in the chat
00:15:13
◼
►
room said it would make the people feel bad who bought a 70d and just got a 70d if you
00:15:16
◼
►
bought a 70d after they stopped manufacturing them and they gave you a 75 they're like yeah
00:15:20
◼
►
I know you ordered a 70 but here's a 75 you would love Tesla you'd be like this is awesome
00:15:24
◼
►
and would 70d people be mad no because they've had their car for a year or whatever like
00:15:28
◼
►
it's not well they'd be mad but it wouldn't be for legitimate reasons but you know do
00:15:32
◼
►
Do other Mac users get mad like,
00:15:33
◼
►
"Hey, that's no fair, I had to pay for that computer new.
00:15:36
◼
►
You bought an old crappy computer and it broke
00:15:38
◼
►
and you got the new one for free."
00:15:39
◼
►
Anyone who begrudges people their good fortune
00:15:42
◼
►
involving the time they chose to purchase
00:15:45
◼
►
or the time their thing broke, it's just ridiculous.
00:15:47
◼
►
So anyway, I don't think this is, as you noted, Margot,
00:15:51
◼
►
like this is a car that, you know,
00:15:53
◼
►
it costs a lot of money, has a big margin.
00:15:55
◼
►
The people who are buying it
00:15:56
◼
►
are probably not caring that much about $3,000 here or there
00:15:59
◼
►
because this is a very expensive car.
00:16:01
◼
►
So in the grand scheme of things,
00:16:02
◼
►
maybe it doesn't hurt them,
00:16:03
◼
►
but they've sort of,
00:16:05
◼
►
they've missed an opportunity to become even more beloved
00:16:08
◼
►
using the Apple style things of just like,
00:16:11
◼
►
surprise and delight or whatever,
00:16:12
◼
►
not just in your application, but also in your policies.
00:16:14
◼
►
It's one of the reasons people like the Genius Bar.
00:16:17
◼
►
I know people have bad experiences with it as well,
00:16:19
◼
►
but to go there, have a person who,
00:16:21
◼
►
will take care of your needs
00:16:23
◼
►
and if there's any sort of issue to have the people go,
00:16:27
◼
►
that's like kind of like a luxury goods experience
00:16:29
◼
►
If you pay, if you really, really massively overpay for something, the one good thing
00:16:33
◼
►
is like if you have any problem with it, like, "Oh, return it anytime or we'll give a new
00:16:36
◼
►
one or we'll clean it up for you for free or whatever," even though you don't massively
00:16:41
◼
►
overpay for Apple stuff, maybe just a little bit overpay, when you go in with your broken
00:16:45
◼
►
computer and they can't replace it because it's too old and they give you a brand new
00:16:48
◼
►
model, that's just awesome.
00:16:50
◼
►
That's like you are loyal for at least another three years before you get mad at them again.
00:16:54
◼
►
- Yeah, and also, keep in mind also,
00:16:56
◼
►
even though all the hype right now is about the Model 3,
00:17:01
◼
►
for the next two years, possibly more,
00:17:04
◼
►
the Model S is still the only Tesla you can buy,
00:17:07
◼
►
or the X, I guess, but nobody wants that one.
00:17:10
◼
►
Sorry, X people.
00:17:11
◼
►
So the entry price, whatever they can make
00:17:14
◼
►
the cheapest Model S, that is the entry price for Tesla
00:17:18
◼
►
for the next X years, two, three, whatever it ends up being
00:17:21
◼
►
before anybody can just go order a Model 3
00:17:24
◼
►
and have it delivered in six weeks or whatever.
00:17:27
◼
►
So the lower they can make that price,
00:17:29
◼
►
the more people they can get into
00:17:31
◼
►
being Tesla customers at all.
00:17:33
◼
►
They also, though, want to preserve those profit margins
00:17:35
◼
►
on the higher spec models,
00:17:37
◼
►
because that's funding the rest of the company.
00:17:40
◼
►
So it's important for them to somehow
00:17:44
◼
►
get the price down enough
00:17:45
◼
►
so they can get a few more people in,
00:17:47
◼
►
basically without cannibalizing their higher end sales,
00:17:50
◼
►
So they have to do tricks like this,
00:17:52
◼
►
where it's like, well, if we sold it just as a 75 before,
00:17:57
◼
►
so it was like 75 for that one, or 85 for the big one up,
00:18:02
◼
►
that was too small of a difference.
00:18:03
◼
►
We would lose too many sales, maybe they figured,
00:18:05
◼
►
so they made that one a 70,
00:18:07
◼
►
even though it technically had 75 in there,
00:18:08
◼
►
or something like that, you know?
00:18:10
◼
►
And then when they raised the other one from 85 to 90,
00:18:13
◼
►
then they raised the other one from 70 to 75,
00:18:15
◼
►
'cause now you're just keeping the same difference.
00:18:17
◼
►
There's all sorts of reasons why they could have done this
00:18:19
◼
►
that make total sense and that even though
00:18:22
◼
►
they might annoy some of the customers
00:18:24
◼
►
who don't think things should work that way,
00:18:26
◼
►
it might be better than the alternative
00:18:28
◼
►
for the company as a whole.
00:18:30
◼
►
- You know, this isn't unprecedented either.
00:18:32
◼
►
Like when I first heard about the story a few days back,
00:18:34
◼
►
my first thought was, "Oh, that's a little gross."
00:18:37
◼
►
But as I was thinking about it while you guys were talking,
00:18:41
◼
►
I paid almost $1,000 for a COB access port,
00:18:45
◼
►
which is a thing, I referred to it as a chip colloquially,
00:18:49
◼
►
But really, it's just a software reprogrammer that you plug into the OBD2 port, and it will
00:18:58
◼
►
reflash the computer and give you a little bit more power, and it makes the car a little
00:19:04
◼
►
And then I was thinking to myself, "Well, but that's a little bit different, because
00:19:06
◼
►
that's third-party."
00:19:08
◼
►
And so, yeah, it makes sense that a third-party is going to want to sell you something to
00:19:12
◼
►
make your car better.
00:19:13
◼
►
But then I got thinking about it a little more, and it occurred to me, BMW sells what
00:19:16
◼
►
they call the Performance Power Kit, which to my understanding does have a little bit
00:19:21
◼
►
of hardware involved, but the majority of the changes are simply a reflash just like
00:19:28
◼
►
my Cobb does. So this is a first-party thing. And again, it's not entirely apples to apples
00:19:34
◼
►
because there is a little bit of hardware, but it's a first-party thing that I'm looking
00:19:38
◼
►
on BMW's website right now and it's $2,107. So this is not that different in my eyes than
00:19:48
◼
►
what BMW is already doing and presumably other manufacturers as well. I wonder, can you pirate
00:19:53
◼
►
a battery? Yeah, I don't know. You could pirate the bid flipping, but no, but in the BMW case,
00:19:59
◼
►
maybe part of the money that you're paying is to offset increased warranty repairs for your engine
00:20:04
◼
►
that is operating slightly outside the intended, you know, boundaries of whatever, you know,
00:20:10
◼
►
depending on what it's changing about the engine. It could be impacting reliability or other issues
00:20:16
◼
►
like that. So the price is basically, everyone pays this price as a blanket insurance policy
00:20:21
◼
►
for these slightly increased odds that you're going to have your valve train blow up or whatever.
00:20:25
◼
►
It could be, but I mean, I would hope and assume that these engines are built in such a way that
00:20:33
◼
►
that their tolerances give them enough leeway that a first party solution would not bump
00:20:39
◼
►
up against any of that. Now my solution might.
00:20:42
◼
►
But there's a reason they sell them where they sell. They sell the, they try it, but
00:20:45
◼
►
the car manufacturer trying to do or sell their engines tuned in a way that balances
00:20:51
◼
►
performance with reliability because. And economy. And emissions. Right, right. So there's
00:20:56
◼
►
a whole bunch of things in the mix there and they're going for something that makes, you
00:21:03
◼
►
You know, the worst thing you want to happen is you put these cars out there with a particular
00:21:07
◼
►
balance of things and it turns out that all of them end up coming back in like six years
00:21:11
◼
►
with something really expensive wrong with the engine.
00:21:13
◼
►
Like you don't want that to happen.
00:21:14
◼
►
But if people say, "Well, I know you can squeeze some more horsepower out of this thing if
00:21:18
◼
►
only you increased the boost on the turbos or, you know, changed the timing or, you know,
00:21:24
◼
►
whatever you want to do on the thing."
00:21:26
◼
►
And it might have a slight detrimental impact on reliability, but if people are willing
00:21:30
◼
►
to give us some money, we'll do that. And then, I guess, like a big pool to pay for
00:21:35
◼
►
the one guy out of every hundred whose engine dies a premature death due to this tuning
00:21:39
◼
►
thing. But everyone has the same engine. It's not as if it's part of your engine that you're
00:21:43
◼
►
not being allowed to use. It's more like, I think of it as like buying AppleCare+ or
00:21:50
◼
►
Fair enough.
00:21:51
◼
►
I was going to say it's like 80-minute CDRs versus 74-minute standard, but as you kept
00:21:57
◼
►
going it ended up being nothing like that.
00:22:02
◼
►
All right, Adam Bushman writes in to say,
00:22:04
◼
►
"Getting to love something like ad bumpers
00:22:06
◼
►
"by just being exposed to it frequently,
00:22:09
◼
►
"that's called the," is that Meri or Meri exposure effect?
00:22:13
◼
►
I'm surely mispronouncing that,
00:22:15
◼
►
but M-E-R-E exposure effect.
00:22:17
◼
►
- You know, Casey, you are the chief pronouncer on the show.
00:22:20
◼
►
- Oh, great.
00:22:21
◼
►
- Chief summarizer and chief pronouncer.
00:22:23
◼
►
- I thought it was like merely by being exposed
00:22:25
◼
►
and it's like the worst name effect ever,
00:22:27
◼
►
the mere exposure effect.
00:22:28
◼
►
Merely by being exposed.
00:22:32
◼
►
Anyway, we'll link the Wikipedia article,
00:22:34
◼
►
which obviously none of us actually read,
00:22:36
◼
►
but you can read it.
00:22:38
◼
►
- You all can do our homework for us.
00:22:39
◼
►
- That's how the show works.
00:22:40
◼
►
It's accidental.
00:22:41
◼
►
- Well, you know, one of the jobs of Wikipedia
00:22:44
◼
►
is every phenomenon that you think has a name probably does.
00:22:47
◼
►
That's probably a phenomenon,
00:22:49
◼
►
the idea that you tell them there's an idea
00:22:51
◼
►
and it turns out there's a name for it already.
00:22:53
◼
►
What is the name of that phenomenon?
00:22:55
◼
►
I bet nobody knows except Merlin.
00:22:56
◼
►
I guarantee you he knows.
00:22:58
◼
►
- He doesn't know, he just looks it up on Wikipedia
00:22:59
◼
►
like everyone else.
00:23:02
◼
►
This is the beginning of the ad.
00:23:03
◼
►
- Our second sponsor tonight is FreshBooks.
00:23:06
◼
►
FreshBooks created cloud accounting software
00:23:08
◼
►
and invoicing software.
00:23:09
◼
►
So ridiculously simple to use
00:23:10
◼
►
that over five million small business owners
00:23:13
◼
►
are now officially feeling the FreshBooks effect,
00:23:15
◼
►
including many of our friends, by the way.
00:23:17
◼
►
This means that a lot more smiling and way less stressing
00:23:19
◼
►
when it comes to dealing with administration, paperwork,
00:23:22
◼
►
invoicing, and getting paid.
00:23:24
◼
►
Now invoicing is where FreshBooks started
00:23:26
◼
►
and it is so good.
00:23:28
◼
►
You can use FreshBooks to create and send invoices.
00:23:31
◼
►
This takes a grand total of literally about 30 seconds.
00:23:34
◼
►
There's no formulas, no formatting,
00:23:35
◼
►
no like error prone manual calculations or anything.
00:23:37
◼
►
Just perfectly crafted invoices every time.
00:23:40
◼
►
And your clients can pay you online.
00:23:43
◼
►
They support all sorts of payment methods and gateways
00:23:46
◼
►
and this means that it's easier for your clients to pay
00:23:48
◼
►
which means you get paid faster.
00:23:50
◼
►
They actually have numbers on this.
00:23:52
◼
►
You get hit an average of a few days faster
00:23:53
◼
►
by doing online payments.
00:23:55
◼
►
Of course, if your clients forget,
00:23:57
◼
►
whether that's in quotes or not, to pay your invoice,
00:24:00
◼
►
you don't have to awkwardly email them,
00:24:02
◼
►
be like, "Hey, did you see my invoice?"
00:24:05
◼
►
'Cause FreshBooks not only logs activity
00:24:07
◼
►
of when things are viewed,
00:24:08
◼
►
so you can see if they open it up and when,
00:24:10
◼
►
but also you can configure FreshBooks
00:24:12
◼
►
to automatically send automated reminders
00:24:15
◼
►
about late payment or due dates coming up,
00:24:17
◼
►
and that way you can avoid having
00:24:19
◼
►
those awkward conversations yourself with your clients.
00:24:21
◼
►
You can also, if you invoice people in person,
00:24:24
◼
►
if you do some kind of service in person,
00:24:26
◼
►
they also recently launched a mobile card reader
00:24:28
◼
►
that will help you take credit cards in person,
00:24:31
◼
►
right there with FreshBooks,
00:24:32
◼
►
right for your invoices for in-person work.
00:24:34
◼
►
And of course, there's all sorts of other tools built in,
00:24:36
◼
►
like you can track your expenses.
00:24:38
◼
►
So you're dealing with consulting clients,
00:24:40
◼
►
you need to invoice them for things or whatever the case,
00:24:42
◼
►
any kind of expenses you have to track,
00:24:43
◼
►
even expenses that aren't related to FreshBooks itself.
00:24:46
◼
►
Like you can connect your bank account
00:24:48
◼
►
and have it track all your expenses
00:24:49
◼
►
and generate your tax form stuff
00:24:51
◼
►
at the end of the year.
00:24:52
◼
►
It's amazing what FreshBooks can do.
00:24:54
◼
►
And of course, in addition to receipts and everything,
00:24:56
◼
►
you can use their mobile app to take pictures of receipts
00:24:58
◼
►
on the go for your expense tracking.
00:25:00
◼
►
There are so many features here,
00:25:01
◼
►
it doesn't all fit in one ad.
00:25:02
◼
►
So I gotta go over things differently in each ad.
00:25:03
◼
►
But tell you what, there's a lot here,
00:25:05
◼
►
and there's an API for developers
00:25:07
◼
►
if you wanna integrate this into your own stuff
00:25:09
◼
►
or customize it.
00:25:10
◼
►
There's so much at FreshBooks.
00:25:11
◼
►
Check it out today.
00:25:12
◼
►
You can try it for free for 30 days.
00:25:14
◼
►
Go to freshbooks.com/atp.
00:25:17
◼
►
Please enter Axanal Tech Podcast
00:25:18
◼
►
in the How Did You Hear About Us section,
00:25:20
◼
►
Just in case you forget to use that code,
00:25:22
◼
►
please remember to put our name
00:25:23
◼
►
in the How'd You Hear About Us section.
00:25:25
◼
►
So, once again, free trial 30 days.
00:25:27
◼
►
Go to freshbooks.com/ATP.
00:25:29
◼
►
Thanks a lot.
00:25:30
◼
►
- This is the end of the ad.
00:25:32
◼
►
- So, the New York Times on the seventh,
00:25:37
◼
►
which was this past Saturday as we record,
00:25:40
◼
►
released an article, Podcast Surge,
00:25:42
◼
►
but Producers Fear Apple Isn't Listening.
00:25:46
◼
►
And this article, it had some problems.
00:25:51
◼
►
The quick summary from your summarizer-in-chief
00:25:55
◼
►
is that Apple supposedly had a handful
00:26:00
◼
►
of big-name podcasters into their campus
00:26:04
◼
►
to talk to Apple about what they want from Apple
00:26:08
◼
►
to make their jobs easier.
00:26:10
◼
►
And the way this New York Times article was written
00:26:12
◼
►
was basically we want all the data about all the things.
00:26:16
◼
►
And Apple may or may not be giving that to us,
00:26:20
◼
►
and that's mildly alarming.
00:26:22
◼
►
This has created quite obviously quite a hubbub
00:26:26
◼
►
in our little circle, because most of the things
00:26:29
◼
►
that the New York Times article is talking about,
00:26:31
◼
►
about big data, about getting access to who listened
00:26:34
◼
►
to what when, and when I say who, I mean, you know,
00:26:37
◼
►
how old is this person, what gender are they,
00:26:38
◼
►
where do they live, how much do they make,
00:26:40
◼
►
what do they like, what do they not like, et cetera.
00:26:42
◼
►
when they listen? Do they listen to the whole thing? Do they only listen to part of it?
00:26:44
◼
►
Did they listen to the beginning and skip the middle? Did they skip the ads? Did they
00:26:47
◼
►
not skip the ads? Do they like the ads? Do they not like the ads? Tell us everything.
00:26:51
◼
►
Well, for those of us who care about our listeners, we don't want that. We don't need that. We
00:26:57
◼
►
don't want that. And we hope we never get in the position that we do need that. And
00:27:01
◼
►
so this article had a lot of problems. And Marco, you wrote a really nice post about
00:27:06
◼
►
I don't really know what to say that hasn't already been said in either Marco's post or
00:27:13
◼
►
Federico's, but I'm sure there's something to be said, so Marco, take it away.
00:27:18
◼
►
I mean, the good thing is all the other stuff that had to be said, Jason and Mike said on upgrade
00:27:22
◼
►
this week, so I suggest you go listen to that instead. But if you really want to stick around
00:27:27
◼
►
here as well or listen to us as well, there's a few parts here. I mean, so you mentioned the data
00:27:33
◼
►
gathering part that the leading podcasters allegedly wanted. By the way,
00:27:36
◼
►
this whole article is stating a bunch of things as fact. Like, this is definitely
00:27:43
◼
►
how Apple does things now. This meeting definitely happened. It definitely
00:27:47
◼
►
happened like this with these people in it. And so far I have not heard any
00:27:52
◼
►
corroboration to support some of these facts, like the specifics about the
00:27:58
◼
►
meeting. Additionally, I know firsthand that many of the things in the article
00:28:02
◼
►
stated as fact or implied as fact are wrong or misleading
00:28:06
◼
►
with how the system works or Apple's role in it
00:28:10
◼
►
or technical details of how it works.
00:28:13
◼
►
So take this article with a giant pile of salt.
00:28:16
◼
►
Honestly, I would say don't even bother reading it
00:28:19
◼
►
if you did read it.
00:28:20
◼
►
It reads more like something that maybe somebody
00:28:24
◼
►
on Forbes would have written to be like an anti-Apple
00:28:27
◼
►
like clickbait piece 'cause it attributes a lot
00:28:30
◼
►
of intent and malice to Apple for what they've been holding back on all these years and stuff
00:28:38
◼
►
like that, that is just misleading at best and in some cases just outright wrong. It
00:28:44
◼
►
needs to be taken with a lot of salt. So that being said, I think you can look at the medium
00:28:51
◼
►
here, the podcasting medium, the way it has worked so far, which basically works like
00:28:57
◼
►
RSS readers that happen to play audio files. That's basically it. Like, sites publish RSS
00:29:02
◼
►
feeds with MP3s or AACs and the vast majority are MP3s, so I'm just going to say that from
00:29:07
◼
►
now on. And clients are basically RSS readers and they fetch those RSS feeds for everything
00:29:12
◼
►
you subscribe to and when a new episode is present, they download the MP3 file that's
00:29:17
◼
►
embedded, the link of which is embedded in the feed. Then they show it to you as an episode.
00:29:21
◼
►
it's playing, it's simply playing an MP3. It is not like loading pages on the site of
00:29:29
◼
►
the podcast provider or anything like that. It is not executing JavaScript on their behalf.
00:29:34
◼
►
It is not sending them tracking information. They do get the hit on their server for when
00:29:41
◼
►
you fetch that MP3. So podcasters already have a certain amount of data about their
00:29:48
◼
►
listeners. And so the idea that like, you know, Apple needs to step in and provide data
00:29:54
◼
►
so that people can have any idea what size their audience is, it's a little exaggerated
00:29:58
◼
►
because we already know how big our audience is. It's a little bit approximated, but I
00:30:03
◼
►
think, you know, I think history shows with a lot of this, you know, data science in massive
00:30:09
◼
►
quotes, I'm just, my fingers are just constantly moving during this whole thing. Constant air
00:30:13
◼
►
air quotes, just up and down.
00:30:15
◼
►
All the web data stuff is also imprecise,
00:30:17
◼
►
so, you know, and is also very easily faked
00:30:20
◼
►
and defrauded all the time and everything,
00:30:22
◼
►
so all the problems that apply to what we have now
00:30:24
◼
►
also apply to proper, my fingers are still moving,
00:30:29
◼
►
big data kind of analytics and creepy tracking stuff.
00:30:34
◼
►
Anyway, so we already know how big the audience is,
00:30:37
◼
►
to a rough degree, where they are, to a rough degree,
00:30:41
◼
►
and how many of them download each show.
00:30:44
◼
►
We don't need that level of data integration
00:30:47
◼
►
where you go much beyond this yet.
00:30:49
◼
►
And we might in the future,
00:30:51
◼
►
in order to get high ad rates, but right now we don't.
00:30:55
◼
►
The reason the web had, well, quote, had to,
00:31:00
◼
►
my fingers are still moving,
00:31:01
◼
►
had to do all this creepy data stuff,
00:31:03
◼
►
is because web ad rates just plummeted.
00:31:07
◼
►
I mean, they were never great to begin with,
00:31:09
◼
►
And over the years since the web has been a thing,
00:31:12
◼
►
I think they've just basically always gone down.
00:31:15
◼
►
Because general web display ads,
00:31:17
◼
►
like ads you'd see on the side of a news site
00:31:19
◼
►
or increasingly on top of the news site
00:31:21
◼
►
you're trying to read floating in,
00:31:23
◼
►
flying around the news site,
00:31:24
◼
►
in the background of the news site,
00:31:26
◼
►
in every sidebar above and below the content,
00:31:27
◼
►
posing as content, posing as,
00:31:29
◼
►
oh, these top news stories,
00:31:30
◼
►
these weird new tricks the new scientists
00:31:32
◼
►
wanted you to learn about Britney Spears.
00:31:34
◼
►
The reason it keeps getting so bad on the web
00:31:36
◼
►
is that nobody looks at web ads, nobody sees,
00:31:39
◼
►
it's not that people see them and ignore them,
00:31:42
◼
►
people don't even see them.
00:31:43
◼
►
Even if you don't have an ad blocker installed,
00:31:46
◼
►
you visually don't see them.
00:31:48
◼
►
Like you don't perceive them, you skip over them.
00:31:52
◼
►
The whole banner blindness thing is real.
00:31:54
◼
►
There's very little that web publishers can really do
00:31:57
◼
►
to make a lot of money on those things.
00:32:01
◼
►
And so they've had to do all this crazy tracking stuff
00:32:04
◼
►
just to try to make it slightly more targeted,
00:32:07
◼
►
to raise the rates slightly more,
00:32:09
◼
►
and then of course there's the rise
00:32:11
◼
►
of all these programmatic ad exchanges,
00:32:12
◼
►
which makes everything even worse,
00:32:14
◼
►
and even more horrible, and even more creepily tracked,
00:32:16
◼
►
but that's a long side that we don't need
00:32:18
◼
►
to get any more into.
00:32:20
◼
►
Summary version, basically, the web sucks for ads.
00:32:25
◼
►
It is a terrible place to advertise,
00:32:27
◼
►
it is a terrible place to publish advertisements,
00:32:30
◼
►
to try to make money from them,
00:32:31
◼
►
additionally, as I mentioned before,
00:32:33
◼
►
all the massive fraud that goes on.
00:32:35
◼
►
It's such a mess.
00:32:37
◼
►
It is so, it's just bad for everybody
00:32:39
◼
►
because the medium just doesn't work that well for display.
00:32:43
◼
►
It just doesn't work very well, simple as that.
00:32:45
◼
►
And as everything gets more and more cutthroat
00:32:47
◼
►
and advanced technically and algorithmically generated
00:32:50
◼
►
and everything, it's just getting worse and worse and worse.
00:32:53
◼
►
And there's kind of no end in sight there.
00:32:55
◼
►
The web as a place to make money through advertising
00:32:58
◼
►
is really a pretty bad place to be.
00:33:02
◼
►
So podcasts on the other hand,
00:33:05
◼
►
because these are just MP3 files,
00:33:07
◼
►
it's just an audio stream,
00:33:09
◼
►
there's basically nothing you can really do
00:33:12
◼
►
to advertise in an audio stream
00:33:15
◼
►
except just insert an ad that somebody is speaking
00:33:19
◼
►
into the stream.
00:33:21
◼
►
And because of lots of reasons,
00:33:23
◼
►
there's not a lot of tracking you can do
00:33:25
◼
►
to say like, you know, did people hear that ad?
00:33:27
◼
►
With a few exceptions, but for the most part,
00:33:30
◼
►
you can't really track did people hear this,
00:33:32
◼
►
Did people listen this far on the show?
00:33:34
◼
►
You pretty much can't do it,
00:33:35
◼
►
'cause what if somebody's playing it on their iPod
00:33:38
◼
►
that doesn't even have an internet connection?
00:33:40
◼
►
You don't know that.
00:33:41
◼
►
They're still playing the file they downloaded from you,
00:33:43
◼
►
and there's no way for that to be reported to you.
00:33:45
◼
►
What if they're playing it in some web embed
00:33:48
◼
►
or Twitter embed, where they can see the MP3 file,
00:33:52
◼
►
but they're not loading a whole app,
00:33:55
◼
►
or they're not loading your whole webpage or something.
00:33:58
◼
►
They're still listening.
00:34:00
◼
►
And by the raw metric of download counts,
00:34:03
◼
►
they will be counted.
00:34:05
◼
►
But that's all you can really get.
00:34:07
◼
►
- What if the soothing sound of our voice
00:34:09
◼
►
put them to sleep, and as they fall asleep,
00:34:11
◼
►
five ants play?
00:34:12
◼
►
- Exactly, yeah, like, should we get paid for those?
00:34:14
◼
►
So there's no way to tell whether somebody
00:34:17
◼
►
has listened to a certain point, basically,
00:34:19
◼
►
unless you control the app.
00:34:21
◼
►
And we'll get to that.
00:34:22
◼
►
So anyway, this to me is like this beautiful system,
00:34:26
◼
►
because the web, I love the web.
00:34:29
◼
►
And it makes me so sad to see what the web has become
00:34:33
◼
►
over the last five years or so,
00:34:36
◼
►
as everything has just gotten so much more cutthroat
00:34:38
◼
►
and driven by automated ad tech
00:34:40
◼
►
and algorithmic content generation.
00:34:42
◼
►
And it's just, as I said, it's just a mess.
00:34:44
◼
►
And as a fan of both the web as a medium
00:34:47
◼
►
and also the openness of blogging
00:34:50
◼
►
and RSS feeds and everything,
00:34:52
◼
►
which I still use, by the way,
00:34:53
◼
►
I still use an RSS reader, it's not dead,
00:34:56
◼
►
That world is losing to Facebook and Twitter
00:35:01
◼
►
and Apple and these kind of closed ecosystems.
00:35:06
◼
►
That makes me very sad.
00:35:08
◼
►
Podcasting is still run that way.
00:35:12
◼
►
The question basically, the debate here,
00:35:15
◼
►
is whether podcasting can still be run that way
00:35:19
◼
►
for a longer time or whether this,
00:35:22
◼
►
the article kept saying it has outgrown its roots.
00:35:26
◼
►
has it, like, does podcasting really need
00:35:29
◼
►
to add all this crap to let people's business grow?
00:35:33
◼
►
Because podcasting is working just fine the way it is.
00:35:37
◼
►
So if you talk about how much you make per listener
00:35:41
◼
►
or per user, ad people call this the CPM,
00:35:44
◼
►
the cost per thousand impressions,
00:35:46
◼
►
however you measure that.
00:35:48
◼
►
Thanks, France, by the way, for the M.
00:35:50
◼
►
So the web, I think you're lucky to get,
00:35:54
◼
►
I mean, what's a good web CPM today?
00:35:56
◼
►
Like a few dollars maybe at most?
00:35:58
◼
►
I mean, and with podcasting, the numbers are lower.
00:36:01
◼
►
The listener numbers are lower.
00:36:02
◼
►
Like, you know, a good website can get
00:36:04
◼
►
millions of hits a month.
00:36:07
◼
►
The top podcast, things like This American Life,
00:36:09
◼
►
like really big podcasts might get like
00:36:12
◼
►
a million downloads a month or something in that ballpark.
00:36:14
◼
►
I don't know, I don't have recent numbers on that,
00:36:15
◼
►
but that's what I heard like a year or two ago
00:36:17
◼
►
or something like that.
00:36:18
◼
►
So you know, a million downloads a month for a podcast
00:36:21
◼
►
would put you in like the top handful of podcasts
00:36:23
◼
►
exist in the world. Whereas a million hits to a webpage is kind of like lower to mid-level
00:36:28
◼
►
traffic these days. Like you can get way more than that if you're a big site. But the podcast
00:36:34
◼
►
can command something like a $20 to $60 CPM instead of what the web is getting like, you
00:36:41
◼
►
know, a dollar or two. Because podcast advertising is just so much more effective. It's not even
00:36:47
◼
►
close. It is way more effective. And part of that is because you have, you know, people
00:36:53
◼
►
like us, like the hosts reading the ads,
00:36:55
◼
►
and that makes you pay attention more,
00:36:57
◼
►
a big part of it is you're actually hearing them,
00:36:59
◼
►
as opposed to the web where you just do not
00:37:01
◼
►
even see the ads at all.
00:37:02
◼
►
And not because of ad blockers,
00:37:03
◼
►
because you actually just ignore them.
00:37:06
◼
►
Podcast ads are so much more effective
00:37:07
◼
►
just because of the medium, because of how it's heard,
00:37:10
◼
►
where it's heard, who is saying it, what they're saying,
00:37:13
◼
►
the relationship people have, the dedication they have,
00:37:16
◼
►
where and how they're listening,
00:37:18
◼
►
as opposed to like on the web,
00:37:19
◼
►
you're kind of just like skimming constantly,
00:37:21
◼
►
and you kind of get through as fast as you can.
00:37:23
◼
►
A podcast you're probably listening to
00:37:25
◼
►
while doing something else, whether it's working,
00:37:27
◼
►
driving, whatever the case, you're less physically engaged
00:37:31
◼
►
in the activity, so you're less likely, I think,
00:37:33
◼
►
to skip the ad.
00:37:34
◼
►
It's just such a different environment
00:37:36
◼
►
that it just happens to work way better for ads.
00:37:40
◼
►
So for some reason, this handful of big podcasters
00:37:44
◼
►
allegedly met with some people at Apple,
00:37:47
◼
►
allegedly trying to get them to say,
00:37:50
◼
►
Well, we want to basically do web levels of data tracking,
00:37:55
◼
►
and we want Apple to put that in their app,
00:37:58
◼
►
because that's the only way we can really have it done
00:38:00
◼
►
is to put these things in apps.
00:38:02
◼
►
The implication there is because they want
00:38:04
◼
►
their business models to be more like the web,
00:38:07
◼
►
and that just seems insane to me,
00:38:10
◼
►
because the web is in such shambles,
00:38:12
◼
►
and we have it great over here in podcast land.
00:38:16
◼
►
They don't know how lucky they are.
00:38:18
◼
►
The web does these data things because it has to
00:38:21
◼
►
for most sites to get anything at all,
00:38:24
◼
►
not because that is the inevitable way forward
00:38:28
◼
►
to quote, "grow" your business.
00:38:30
◼
►
Podcasting is not new.
00:38:33
◼
►
It is not even, I wouldn't even say it's booming.
00:38:37
◼
►
I think it's growing steadily
00:38:39
◼
►
the same way it has for 10 years.
00:38:41
◼
►
And if you look at like podcast growth,
00:38:44
◼
►
it's not a hockey stick curve.
00:38:46
◼
►
it's basically a line. And everyone who thinks it's new, it's just like the tip of the iceberg
00:38:52
◼
►
thing where it finally pooped out of the ocean, where it's like they think, "Oh my god, this
00:38:56
◼
►
is here all of a sudden." And in reality, like, no, it's been growing the entire time
00:38:59
◼
►
under the ocean, you just didn't see it. There's basically the debate over whether podcasting
00:39:07
◼
►
needs to change in order to enable "growth" or to mature or something. And what angered
00:39:14
◼
►
me so much about this article, in addition to all the things that it got factually wrong
00:39:18
◼
►
or misleading, it basically stated as given, as fact, that podcasting was outgrowing its
00:39:26
◼
►
roots and needed to change the way it operates, to be more like the web. I very strongly disagree
00:39:33
◼
►
with that. I'm not saying that podcasting should never change, but I am saying I don't
00:39:38
◼
►
think it needs to change in this way right now, and possibly ever, because this is a
00:39:44
◼
►
a different medium, it works very differently, and the idea that a few people, most of whom
00:39:49
◼
►
come from the web and ad tech worlds, think that podcasts should work more like the web,
00:39:55
◼
►
first of all I find that baffling, because as I said the web sucks, and second of all
00:39:59
◼
►
I think that is a bad argument, it doesn't follow, like you can't make that argument
00:40:04
◼
►
without support that's showing that somehow podcasting is really suffering without this
00:40:09
◼
►
and is declining and needs this to survive, and I'm seeing no evidence of that at all,
00:40:13
◼
►
In fact, I'm seeing the opposite.
00:40:14
◼
►
I'm seeing podcasting is growing and is doing very well.
00:40:17
◼
►
Going to the Apple side, like what could Apple do?
00:40:20
◼
►
Apple is a directory, they're the biggest directory,
00:40:25
◼
►
and they have this big editorial section
00:40:27
◼
►
where they can promote shows, which they do.
00:40:29
◼
►
And as far as I know, they're the only people
00:40:31
◼
►
who invest a lot of human effort
00:40:33
◼
►
to actually make editorial podcast picks
00:40:36
◼
►
in lots of different categories every week,
00:40:38
◼
►
and around the world, I think.
00:40:40
◼
►
So they're already doing a lot on the editorial side.
00:40:44
◼
►
I don't know what else they could do on the editorial side.
00:40:46
◼
►
I think they're already doing way more
00:40:49
◼
►
than anybody could be expected to do,
00:40:52
◼
►
given that they're making so little money off of podcasting.
00:40:54
◼
►
I think they're doing a very good job.
00:40:56
◼
►
Apple, I think editorially, I think they're set.
00:40:59
◼
►
We should be thankful they're doing as much as they do.
00:41:02
◼
►
And then you have the Apple Player.
00:41:05
◼
►
And this is kind of where, so the Apple Podcast Player
00:41:08
◼
►
is the most popular podcast playing app,
00:41:10
◼
►
the one built into iOS.
00:41:11
◼
►
I don't know how well iTunes does anymore on the desktop.
00:41:13
◼
►
I think it's pretty small probably,
00:41:14
◼
►
but the one on iOS that comes with iOS
00:41:17
◼
►
called Podcasts from Apple with the purple icon,
00:41:20
◼
►
that is the most popular podcast player on the world.
00:41:21
◼
►
It has something like 60% or 70% of podcast downloads
00:41:26
◼
►
according to most people.
00:41:28
◼
►
And so they're basically pushing Apple to say,
00:41:30
◼
►
the stats we get now are not enough.
00:41:32
◼
►
We want you to do two things for us.
00:41:34
◼
►
We want you to A, give us as much data as you can
00:41:37
◼
►
about the people.
00:41:38
◼
►
So tell us like how many of these downloads into your app
00:41:40
◼
►
actually get listened to?
00:41:41
◼
►
Where do they listen, you know,
00:41:43
◼
►
where do they stop playing each episode?
00:41:44
◼
►
Like what, exactly what timestamp down to the second
00:41:47
◼
►
so we can optimize our content
00:41:48
◼
►
and tweak our storytelling abilities
00:41:51
◼
►
and then our advertisers can ask
00:41:52
◼
►
how many people actually heard our entire ad
00:41:54
◼
►
so they can then, I guess, not pay us?
00:41:57
◼
►
Like I, I get, a lot of these things don't make sense
00:42:00
◼
►
once you think them through.
00:42:01
◼
►
But I don't know why, why are podcasting
00:42:04
◼
►
to be asking for some of these things?
00:42:05
◼
►
But anyway, so that's part one,
00:42:08
◼
►
is that they want Apple to add all this creepy data tracking
00:42:11
◼
►
to their player app, and then to report it
00:42:14
◼
►
to the podcasters in some way.
00:42:15
◼
►
And once again, I think Jason Snow and Mike Hurley
00:42:18
◼
►
on Upgrade this past week did a very, very good job
00:42:21
◼
►
of covering exactly what the kind of implications
00:42:24
◼
►
of this would be, and how just the scale
00:42:27
◼
►
of the operation this would entail to even do this
00:42:30
◼
►
if they wanted to, and how useful the data would actually be
00:42:33
◼
►
considering that it's not, like it isn't all listeners.
00:42:37
◼
►
It's, depending on the show, somewhere between like
00:42:40
◼
►
probably 20 and 70% of the listeners.
00:42:43
◼
►
So, you know, and it might not be a representative sample.
00:42:46
◼
►
So it's, you know, the quality of the data they would get
00:42:49
◼
►
would itself be in question even if they got it.
00:42:52
◼
►
And in the process of them getting it
00:42:54
◼
►
and the systems involved, the implementation of that
00:42:57
◼
►
would be a huge mess, not to mention all the ethical
00:43:00
◼
►
and quality issues, it would then create
00:43:03
◼
►
the incentives it would create with podcast creation,
00:43:06
◼
►
with these pro podcasters to like,
00:43:08
◼
►
structure their shows differently
00:43:10
◼
►
so that they would boost these numbers
00:43:11
◼
►
in these little tiny ways that would kinda
00:43:14
◼
►
sacrifice quality or overall flow,
00:43:17
◼
►
but it would give us 5% more this month, you know.
00:43:20
◼
►
'Cause you can say now that would never happen,
00:43:22
◼
►
but look at the web, it happens, it always happens.
00:43:24
◼
►
So, you know, let's not kid ourselves,
00:43:26
◼
►
like that would definitely happen.
00:43:28
◼
►
So you have this massive problematic request
00:43:32
◼
►
of the more data.
00:43:34
◼
►
Then you also have the request from the podcasters
00:43:37
◼
►
that Apple enable other business models.
00:43:39
◼
►
And what they basically mean is,
00:43:41
◼
►
enable a way for people to pay for our shows.
00:43:44
◼
►
You know, there's already ways to pay for podcasts.
00:43:47
◼
►
Lots of podcasts do.
00:43:49
◼
►
I know this because Overcast doesn't support their feeds.
00:43:51
◼
►
And I hear from all their fans every day.
00:43:56
◼
►
There's already ways to do things like paid feeds,
00:43:59
◼
►
members only feeds, whether it's password protected
00:44:01
◼
►
or it's hidden URLs, I do support those,
00:44:04
◼
►
thanks Jason, I do support those.
00:44:07
◼
►
Please subscribe to Six Colors.
00:44:09
◼
►
You know, the password stuff I don't support
00:44:10
◼
►
and a lot of them, there'll be like a members only area
00:44:14
◼
►
or paid podcasts that aren't even distributed
00:44:16
◼
►
as podcast files, they're in a feed,
00:44:18
◼
►
you sign up with their website
00:44:19
◼
►
and then you can download the raw audio files.
00:44:21
◼
►
There are lots of ways to do this.
00:44:23
◼
►
The biggest way to do this though,
00:44:26
◼
►
Apple made in 2008.
00:44:27
◼
►
It's called the App Store.
00:44:29
◼
►
This is what most people do.
00:44:31
◼
►
If they wanna have a paid podcast,
00:44:33
◼
►
they release their own app to play their podcast,
00:44:37
◼
►
which gives them all of the capabilities
00:44:40
◼
►
that the podcasters are asking Apple for, allegedly.
00:44:43
◼
►
That already exists.
00:44:44
◼
►
It's existed for eight years.
00:44:46
◼
►
It's called the App Store.
00:44:48
◼
►
You can make your app,
00:44:49
◼
►
you can charge whatever you want for the app,
00:44:51
◼
►
you can have in-app purchase in the app,
00:44:53
◼
►
you can control the entire player experience
00:44:55
◼
►
and do all the creepy data tracking you want.
00:44:58
◼
►
That's already there.
00:44:59
◼
►
Many podcasts have their own apps.
00:45:02
◼
►
This is not a new thing.
00:45:03
◼
►
And it works okay.
00:45:05
◼
►
I don't know anybody who makes a ton
00:45:07
◼
►
of their listenership or money that way,
00:45:10
◼
►
but they make some, it's fine.
00:45:12
◼
►
So you know what?
00:45:13
◼
►
If that's the kind of system you want, it already exists.
00:45:16
◼
►
And take it from a developer,
00:45:18
◼
►
I guarantee you that whatever Apple would do
00:45:21
◼
►
with the podcast app store,
00:45:22
◼
►
or with the podcast store
00:45:24
◼
►
that everyone's apparently asking for, would be worse.
00:45:27
◼
►
That would be a worse system than just making your own app.
00:45:32
◼
►
You don't want that.
00:45:33
◼
►
Trust me, either way, Apple's taking 30%.
00:45:35
◼
►
Let's be honest here.
00:45:36
◼
►
I mean, we know that.
00:45:37
◼
►
They're taking at least 30% either way.
00:45:40
◼
►
At least in the App Store, it's only 30%.
00:45:42
◼
►
If they make their own podcast store,
00:45:44
◼
►
that gives them the opportunity to set a new rate.
00:45:45
◼
►
They might be hired now that Apple's a services company.
00:45:47
◼
►
So, believe me, you don't want that.
00:45:50
◼
►
- But don't you understand why they don't want
00:45:51
◼
►
to make their own app?
00:45:52
◼
►
Like, isn't it obvious, like, the fragmentation problem of that?
00:45:56
◼
►
If everyone has their own app, like, the advancement of the app store is like the one place you
00:46:00
◼
►
go to get all the software instead of having to go to individual developers' websites that
00:46:04
◼
►
have discoverability problems and making people aware and getting the fatigue.
00:46:08
◼
►
Kind of like we have on Apple TV now, like, the fatigue of, like, if I want to list this
00:46:12
◼
►
podcast, I got to do this app, and I want to do that podcast, I got to do that app.
00:46:16
◼
►
Kind of like when books were individual apps back when Apple was allowing that, where you
00:46:19
◼
►
got one book as an individual app. It's just a lot of fragmentation and if everybody did
00:46:24
◼
►
that, it's really hard to get attention from anybody. And the sort of level playing player
00:46:29
◼
►
that you were talking about before is an advantage of saying, "Look, Apple, if you just implement
00:46:33
◼
►
this stuff as sort of the baseline within the only podcast player app that matters,
00:46:38
◼
►
the built-in Apple one as far as these people are concerned, allegedly, in this article
00:46:42
◼
►
here, then we wouldn't have to fight for the attention to get our app downloaded." And
00:46:47
◼
►
It really is a barrier to people.
00:46:48
◼
►
Like people don't want to have to download a new app for,
00:46:51
◼
►
it's like having to download a new app
00:46:53
◼
►
for every movie you want to see.
00:46:54
◼
►
It's like rather just go to a store
00:46:55
◼
►
and be able to rent or buy the movie
00:46:56
◼
►
and you don't have to go to 17 different stores.
00:46:58
◼
►
Then there are still multiple stores,
00:46:59
◼
►
but if it was one per podcast, that's bad.
00:47:02
◼
►
So I kind of, what I'm trying to do reading this article
00:47:05
◼
►
is put myself into perhaps not the head space
00:47:08
◼
►
of the theoretical people who talk to Apple,
00:47:11
◼
►
but the head space of the author of this article,
00:47:14
◼
►
because a lot of things in this article are not quotes,
00:47:17
◼
►
are not like sentiments attributed to people
00:47:20
◼
►
who supposedly met with Apple,
00:47:21
◼
►
but rather are just stated in what looks like
00:47:24
◼
►
the author's voice, presumably informed by,
00:47:27
◼
►
I don't know, by accounts of the meeting.
00:47:31
◼
►
And I'm trying to figure out like,
00:47:33
◼
►
why is it that the author or the people
00:47:37
◼
►
that the author spoke to believe these things
00:47:40
◼
►
about podcasting?
00:47:41
◼
►
Like what is, I don't know, what are we missing?
00:47:45
◼
►
'cause I think you've outlined it pretty well.
00:47:47
◼
►
Like from our perspective, it doesn't make any sense,
00:47:48
◼
►
but our perspective isn't the only perspective.
00:47:50
◼
►
And I think the best thing I've come up with is that
00:47:54
◼
►
if you want to reach a bigger audience,
00:48:00
◼
►
like podcasts are the size that they are.
00:48:02
◼
►
Serial is way bigger than lots of podcasts.
00:48:04
◼
►
This American Life is way bigger,
00:48:05
◼
►
but that kind of barely counts
00:48:06
◼
►
'cause it built its audience on the radio
00:48:08
◼
►
and not as a podcast, right?
00:48:10
◼
►
If you wanna go really big with that,
00:48:14
◼
►
Big audience means, I suppose, high production values.
00:48:19
◼
►
It costs more to make shows than good to,
00:48:21
◼
►
I don't even know if that's true, but again,
00:48:22
◼
►
I'm trying to get in their head and they're thinking.
00:48:25
◼
►
- I think it's loosely correlated.
00:48:26
◼
►
High production values can result in better shows.
00:48:28
◼
►
They sometimes do result in better shows,
00:48:30
◼
►
but they don't always, and they aren't always required.
00:48:33
◼
►
- Right, but anyway, if you were going
00:48:35
◼
►
for a much bigger audience, part of that would also
00:48:38
◼
►
be going for bigger advertisers, advertisers who are used,
00:48:43
◼
►
who would not bother advertising on the numbers
00:48:47
◼
►
that most podcasts put up.
00:48:49
◼
►
And if you want big advertisers,
00:48:52
◼
►
big advertisers having been conditioned
00:48:54
◼
►
by all the crap on the web that you just talked about,
00:48:57
◼
►
want this information that is not available from podcasts.
00:49:00
◼
►
So it's kind of like, we wanna go really big,
00:49:03
◼
►
we wanna go mass market.
00:49:04
◼
►
And by the way, when you go mass market,
00:49:05
◼
►
your CPMs go down because mass market,
00:49:08
◼
►
like we're gonna make a show for everybody,
00:49:10
◼
►
everybody is not as valuable as people
00:49:12
◼
►
who are super duper into model trains.
00:49:14
◼
►
Because if you have a podcast, you know,
00:49:16
◼
►
for people who are super duper into model trains,
00:49:19
◼
►
model train manufacturers will pay a lot for that, right?
00:49:22
◼
►
Whereas if you're gonna have,
00:49:23
◼
►
our podcast is listened to by everyone,
00:49:26
◼
►
everyone's not a great demo.
00:49:27
◼
►
Or like, our podcast is listened to by, you know,
00:49:30
◼
►
like you really, the reason podcasts get such high CPMs
00:49:33
◼
►
and the reason I think a lot of tech podcasts
00:49:35
◼
►
get high CPMs is it's a narrow self-selecting audience
00:49:39
◼
►
based on the topic.
00:49:41
◼
►
and those audiences can be much more valuable
00:49:43
◼
►
than the mass audiences.
00:49:44
◼
►
So anyway, if you want to make podcasts way bigger
00:49:47
◼
►
and sell to a mass audience and your CPM goes down,
00:49:50
◼
►
you really need the tools that will let you get Coca-Cola
00:49:53
◼
►
to put an advertisement on your thing,
00:49:54
◼
►
or talk to Procter and Gamble or whatever.
00:49:56
◼
►
Like these really big things that buy Super Bowl ads
00:50:01
◼
►
and you have huge ad budgets.
00:50:04
◼
►
And I think that's kind of the chicken egg,
00:50:07
◼
►
the thing they're trying to go.
00:50:08
◼
►
It's like podcasts,
00:50:09
◼
►
it looks like almost like a wasted medium
00:50:11
◼
►
from the perspective of these people
00:50:13
◼
►
who wanna go for a big audience.
00:50:14
◼
►
Like I bet many more people would go for,
00:50:17
◼
►
or think about radio.
00:50:18
◼
►
Like you'd have, you know,
00:50:20
◼
►
every kind of mass advertiser would be on radio
00:50:22
◼
►
because like, oh, this reaches everybody.
00:50:24
◼
►
But the everybody model is so different
00:50:26
◼
►
than the current podcasting model.
00:50:27
◼
►
I think what they want to happen is,
00:50:29
◼
►
please make a world where Coca-Cola will advertise.
00:50:32
◼
►
And here are the ingredients we see
00:50:34
◼
►
that will hook up all the pieces in this chain
00:50:37
◼
►
so that we will have a podcast that plays to 50 million people and that really big companies
00:50:42
◼
►
pay for ads at a tremendous rate and a tremendously low CPM, but we'll make it up in volume and
00:50:47
◼
►
now we are a big player and we will just squish all the other shows and it'll make Serial
00:50:51
◼
►
look like a little silly NPR fluke. I don't even know if Serial was NPR, sorry PRI if
00:50:56
◼
►
that's you or whoever the hell it is. And that's so outside our understanding of podcasts
00:51:03
◼
►
and our little tech circle and our nerdy podcast and stuff like that.
00:51:07
◼
►
I don't necessarily think that that can't and shouldn't exist, but as a goal, I kind
00:51:16
◼
►
of see it as, "Well, there's something to that.
00:51:18
◼
►
Imagine if you have the podcast that everybody listened to."
00:51:21
◼
►
Seriality seems like it was.
00:51:22
◼
►
Most people, you know, it's just big compared to other podcasts.
00:51:25
◼
►
It's not as if someone came out with the equivalent of Star Wars 1977, the movie that everybody
00:51:33
◼
►
and a generation saw, there is no podcast equivalent to that yet.
00:51:37
◼
►
And they could be going for it, and I think that's an interesting goal and interesting
00:51:40
◼
►
thing to aspire to, but the things they're asking for, A, are informed by the web, and
00:51:45
◼
►
like you said, that's pretty stupid, and B, what they're asking Apple to do, I don't understand
00:51:51
◼
►
why maybe they haven't been burned enough by this, but asking Apple to, "Hey, build
00:51:55
◼
►
these analytics into your app and subscriptions and stuff like that," and of course there
00:52:00
◼
►
There are so many things that only Apple can do because they're platform-level things or
00:52:03
◼
►
have to do with the App Store and there's only one way to get software on your things
00:52:06
◼
►
is through the App Store.
00:52:08
◼
►
Again focusing on iOS, but I'm sure they make the same pitch to Google, although Google
00:52:11
◼
►
has its own Google Play thing going on over there.
00:52:14
◼
►
But were they successful in lobbying Apple for the things they supposedly want, they
00:52:18
◼
►
will just, you know, in their wildest dreams, what they will have successfully done is created
00:52:23
◼
►
YouTube, which is terrible.
00:52:24
◼
►
which is never a situation where the only
00:52:27
◼
►
Reasonable way to make money with video on the web is through YouTube and YouTube controls or music
00:52:33
◼
►
Yeah, yeah YouTube controls everything about it
00:52:36
◼
►
And there's no competition and they can change the terms at any time and what the hell you gonna do because it's YouTube like why?
00:52:42
◼
►
Would you ask for that? Why would you you are you know again Tapples credit or whatever or apples apathy or whatever like that?
00:52:49
◼
►
Probably not gonna do any of this stuff
00:52:51
◼
►
But if they did it would be terrible for everyone involved both the big guys because they would just be
00:52:56
◼
►
Putting themselves under the thumb of Apple and for the small people who were like no we don't want that
00:53:00
◼
►
We like to be free and open or whatever like so it's a terrible
00:53:03
◼
►
Doomsday scenario if they got what they wanted because it would it would just make it
00:53:08
◼
►
dysfunction all the ways you talked about for the web and the data and the in ever-decreasing
00:53:11
◼
►
CPMs and the perverse incentives and the fraud and everything like that and you would be shoveling all of the power in the market to
00:53:18
◼
►
this one gatekeeper just because you didn't want to write your own app and because you couldn't
00:53:22
◼
►
abide to have a simple open system with RSS feeds because it just didn't give you the analytics you
00:53:27
◼
►
want. It's such a terrible thing to want. Again, I kind of see where they're coming from and we want
00:53:33
◼
►
the big breakout hit and we need this data and we need these tools, but I feel like you should work
00:53:37
◼
►
that out. It's so hard for me to talk about this to even accepting the premise that these things
00:53:42
◼
►
happen in the article, what they said they did, but let's pretend that it did. You should be
00:53:46
◼
►
talking to Coca-Cola about how they should be okay with funding this podcast full of
00:53:53
◼
►
celebrities that you think millions and millions of people are going to listen to without the
00:53:57
◼
►
obsessive data that they think they should technically be able to get.
00:54:01
◼
►
It's like Coca-Cola, picture back to the olden days when people filled out little paper forms
00:54:05
◼
►
after they watched television shows and you bought advertisement based on that.
00:54:10
◼
►
And now we're going to tell you a precise number of downloads and you won't do it because
00:54:13
◼
►
it's just not enough data and you need to know the exact demos and again where they
00:54:16
◼
►
live and what their income is and what things they last clicked on and what their last boss
00:54:18
◼
►
on Amazon, what Cookie has been tracking them through their Facebook clicks for the last
00:54:23
◼
►
- oh, it's just...
00:54:26
◼
►
It's a somewhat admirable goal to try to make a podcast breakout hit, but I think the supposed
00:54:34
◼
►
demands of these people in this article are totally the wrong way to go about it.
00:54:41
◼
►
And one tiny passage that I highlighted here, just to finish up, like, makes me just question
00:54:46
◼
►
everything about this.
00:54:47
◼
►
This is, again, not a quote and not attributed to anything, but the article says, "Promotion
00:54:51
◼
►
within iTunes, which is one of the only reliable ways to build an audience, particularly for
00:54:56
◼
►
a new show, is decided by a small team, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:55:00
◼
►
Promotion within iTunes is not only one of the only reliable ways to build an audience,
00:55:07
◼
►
But probably one of the worst ways to build an audience.
00:55:13
◼
►
If you could guarantee that you would be promoted as the number one podcast on iTunes for an
00:55:18
◼
►
entire year, would that build an audience?
00:55:21
◼
►
Versus, say, if you made a podcast that promised to slowly lay out the plot for Star Wars Episode
00:55:28
◼
►
VIII, the episode VIII, entirely unpromoted on iTunes podcast, would crush your podcast.
00:55:34
◼
►
the only reliable way to build it you build an audience by making things that people like and
00:55:39
◼
►
Leveraging an existing audience is probably the best way to build nights
00:55:43
◼
►
But the only reliable way like I don't know
00:55:45
◼
►
I can't think of a single person who found their favorite podcast because it was promoted on iTunes
00:55:50
◼
►
I'm sure they're out there and I'm sure they'll send us things but like it's just such a warped view of the world of podcast
00:55:55
◼
►
Listening like that's not how people discovered cereal people did not discover cereal because it was promoted on iTunes
00:56:01
◼
►
It was promoted in iTunes because people discovered cereal like it's you know, like there is a place for editorial order
00:56:07
◼
►
But if you got it in your head that iTunes is already this this kingmaker gatekeeper
00:56:12
◼
►
I don't know you you are
00:56:16
◼
►
abdicating all of your responsibility to build your own audience by having a good show and doing your own marketing and stuff like that like
00:56:21
◼
►
Again, editorials important and they do promote shows and it's important like, you know for shows to come out of obscurity
00:56:28
◼
►
That Apple can you know put them in new and noteworthy and whatever whatever weird systems they're having and it's a fun little thing
00:56:35
◼
►
But really to frame it as the only reliable way to build an audience particularly for a new show that
00:56:41
◼
►
That just does not match with my understanding of the podcast world at all
00:56:46
◼
►
Especially when it comes to mass-market shows because the mass market is not trolling the iTunes podcast directory
00:56:52
◼
►
They don't even know what podcasts are right
00:56:54
◼
►
they only know because they heard about cereal
00:56:56
◼
►
and then they figured out what podcasts are.
00:56:57
◼
►
- Like that's the problem,
00:56:58
◼
►
like by treating Apple as the whole world,
00:57:02
◼
►
you know, as you very well said,
00:57:04
◼
►
like you're not only like trying to make them
00:57:07
◼
►
the only platform that matters at all
00:57:08
◼
►
and trying to increase their share,
00:57:10
◼
►
but you're also kinda investing in the seeking shit
00:57:12
◼
►
because that 60% market share
00:57:15
◼
►
that they most likely have among listening,
00:57:17
◼
►
that goes down every year.
00:57:19
◼
►
Believe me, I've been watching.
00:57:20
◼
►
That's decreasing over time.
00:57:23
◼
►
as more podcast players sprout up on iOS,
00:57:27
◼
►
and as more people finally get around to listening on Android
00:57:29
◼
►
because Android so far has been very underrepresented
00:57:32
◼
►
in podcast stats, according to most big hosts.
00:57:35
◼
►
I know Libsyn used to announce numbers every so often.
00:57:38
◼
►
It used to be something like eight to one in favor of iOS
00:57:42
◼
►
for every show that they host, which is a lot of shows.
00:57:45
◼
►
Now Android's getting higher.
00:57:46
◼
►
You have people like Google Play and Spotify
00:57:49
◼
►
entering the podcast market in possibly big ways.
00:57:53
◼
►
We'll see how those end up going,
00:57:55
◼
►
and I don't like them, but they exist,
00:57:57
◼
►
so we'll see how that ends up going.
00:57:58
◼
►
But you have the podcast market
00:58:02
◼
►
becoming more and more diverse.
00:58:04
◼
►
Apple's market share is going down,
00:58:07
◼
►
and all of a sudden these people want to give Apple
00:58:09
◼
►
a reason to lock things down and dominate.
00:58:12
◼
►
That's a terrible idea.
00:58:14
◼
►
And also, the idea of relying on them
00:58:17
◼
►
for all of your audience growth is ridiculous.
00:58:21
◼
►
We know from the App Store,
00:58:24
◼
►
we know everyone who relies only on the App Store
00:58:28
◼
►
for their promotion, we tell them they're doing it wrong.
00:58:31
◼
►
We tell them, no, you can't,
00:58:32
◼
►
even the App Store people will tell you,
00:58:34
◼
►
please don't rely on us.
00:58:36
◼
►
And if you're trying to get featured by the App Store
00:58:39
◼
►
and you have no other marketing,
00:58:42
◼
►
that actually hurts your chances of being featured.
00:58:45
◼
►
they want to feature things that have real marketing plans.
00:58:48
◼
►
And so the idea of trying to basically make Apple
00:58:52
◼
►
do all your work for you to promote your podcast,
00:58:55
◼
►
as you said, Jon, is terrible.
00:58:56
◼
►
Also, getting back to the ad thing for a second,
00:58:59
◼
►
which kind of ties into this,
00:59:01
◼
►
everything that the podcasters are asking Apple to do,
00:59:06
◼
►
or asking for, basically comes down to
00:59:09
◼
►
we are not making enough per listener from our ads,
00:59:14
◼
►
and we would like to add all this tracking
00:59:15
◼
►
so that we can make more money.
00:59:17
◼
►
It's basically like saying the only way for us to grow
00:59:21
◼
►
is to extract more out of the existing listener base.
00:59:24
◼
►
Remember what I said earlier about the relative size
00:59:27
◼
►
of the audience between podcasts and the web?
00:59:30
◼
►
A great podcast might get a few hundred thousand downloads
00:59:35
◼
►
That would put it in like the top probably five or 1%
00:59:39
◼
►
of podcasts.
00:59:40
◼
►
On the web, that's nothing.
00:59:42
◼
►
if you want to grow your business as podcasters.
00:59:46
◼
►
The way for growth is to get more people
00:59:49
◼
►
listening to podcasts, and then to get more people
00:59:52
◼
►
listening to your podcast.
00:59:53
◼
►
That's obvious, like I don't understand
00:59:57
◼
►
how anybody can look at the situation now and say,
01:00:00
◼
►
well what we need to really grow this,
01:00:03
◼
►
we're outgrowing this old model here,
01:00:06
◼
►
what we really need is ad tech?
01:00:09
◼
►
No, you need more people listening to podcasts.
01:00:12
◼
►
You know how you do that?
01:00:13
◼
►
It's not by making podcasts suck.
01:00:15
◼
►
It's not by getting all creepy on people
01:00:18
◼
►
and putting all this stuff in their face.
01:00:20
◼
►
It's not by putting up a paywall, sorry.
01:00:23
◼
►
Grow the audience!
01:00:24
◼
►
That's the way for revenue growth.
01:00:28
◼
►
You start doing all this data mining crap
01:00:30
◼
►
when either your ads don't work
01:00:32
◼
►
or when you have saturated the audience
01:00:35
◼
►
and you need to find new ways to extract more
01:00:36
◼
►
out of what you have.
01:00:38
◼
►
Neither of those things are true for podcasting.
01:00:40
◼
►
It's the opposite.
01:00:41
◼
►
Podcasting has tons of room to grow.
01:00:44
◼
►
It is growing, not as a hockey stick level growth,
01:00:47
◼
►
but it is steadily growing over time.
01:00:49
◼
►
There's tons of potential still to grow into,
01:00:52
◼
►
especially as we have further penetration
01:00:55
◼
►
of Bluetooth and cell phones in cars,
01:00:57
◼
►
which is where a lot of listening happens,
01:00:59
◼
►
and we have all these new cheap home speaker
01:01:02
◼
►
Bluetooth devices, people who listen more at home,
01:01:05
◼
►
and you have people getting more and more
01:01:06
◼
►
into the habit of listening to things on their smartphones.
01:01:09
◼
►
There is tons of room for growth here.
01:01:12
◼
►
And there are so many people who don't listen
01:01:14
◼
►
to podcasts now.
01:01:16
◼
►
That's where you focus.
01:01:17
◼
►
You focus your effort on growing the pool.
01:01:20
◼
►
We're already making great rates on the ads.
01:01:23
◼
►
Rates that, as you said, when you expand Coca-Cola,
01:01:27
◼
►
all these things where like, oh, we have to expand it
01:01:29
◼
►
to brand advertising.
01:01:29
◼
►
Okay, so right now, we have mostly
01:01:32
◼
►
direct response advertisers.
01:01:33
◼
►
This is things like Squarespace, things like,
01:01:35
◼
►
things where you sign up for a service,
01:01:38
◼
►
or you buy a product and you give them some kind of coupon
01:01:41
◼
►
or discount code or you visit a special URL
01:01:43
◼
►
and they track how many people bought their thing
01:01:48
◼
►
through each show or each episode's URL
01:01:50
◼
►
and that kind of gives them an idea
01:01:51
◼
►
of how many people might have heard the ad
01:01:53
◼
►
and how much they are willing to pay for future ads
01:01:56
◼
►
as a result of how much they're making from their past ads.
01:01:58
◼
►
All these articles about how much we have to like,
01:02:02
◼
►
you know, move into brand advertising,
01:02:03
◼
►
they're all like, well, we just keep hearing the same ads
01:02:06
◼
►
from like Squarespace over and over again.
01:02:07
◼
►
You ever wonder why?
01:02:09
◼
►
They're not dumb.
01:02:10
◼
►
They're buying them because they work really well.
01:02:13
◼
►
And whatever they're spending on the ads,
01:02:14
◼
►
which as I said is a really nice amount by CPM,
01:02:18
◼
►
whatever they're spending on the ads,
01:02:20
◼
►
they're making that back.
01:02:21
◼
►
They can see it in direct response conversions and results.
01:02:25
◼
►
The reason why we have so many direct response advertisers
01:02:28
◼
►
and why every podcast for the most part does
01:02:32
◼
►
is because they can directly measure the value,
01:02:35
◼
►
they see it and they say we want more because these ads are working ridiculously well. Brand
01:02:42
◼
►
advertising, things like, oh we're going to plaster Coke ads all over these billboards
01:02:46
◼
►
for the next 10 years and hope that increases our margin slightly. Brand advertising by
01:02:50
◼
►
definition is almost impossible to measure. It basically goes unmeasured. Brand advertising
01:02:56
◼
►
is basically a shot in the dark. There are people are just hoping that over time by getting
01:03:01
◼
►
their logo and their name out there and associating happy things with their brand or whatever,
01:03:05
◼
►
people will start recognizing their brand
01:03:07
◼
►
and sales will slowly increase as this recognition builds.
01:03:10
◼
►
The web has developed such incredibly sophisticated
01:03:13
◼
►
and creepy levels of tracking and analytics
01:03:15
◼
►
and behavioral monitoring and surveillance
01:03:18
◼
►
that they can see to a much greater degree
01:03:20
◼
►
what works and what doesn't.
01:03:22
◼
►
Brand ads don't pay that much on the web
01:03:24
◼
►
because they can see it's not working.
01:03:27
◼
►
When you're saying you want brand ads,
01:03:29
◼
►
what you're really saying is,
01:03:30
◼
►
we're gonna sell brand ads because our ads don't work.
01:03:33
◼
►
So we're gonna sell these to you, Coke,
01:03:34
◼
►
because we know you won't really be able to measure.
01:03:37
◼
►
- Well, but Coke also isn't interested in the small numbers
01:03:39
◼
►
and Squarespace, maybe not Squarespace,
01:03:42
◼
►
but some other advertisers that are basically paying
01:03:45
◼
►
to acquire new customers for some kind of subscription plan
01:03:48
◼
►
may not be able to pay, like Coke will pay more
01:03:52
◼
►
because brand advertising is by definition
01:03:54
◼
►
a we want the big numbers, huge shotgun approach.
01:03:58
◼
►
That's the only type of advertising
01:03:59
◼
►
to which the sort of general purpose broad demographic
01:04:03
◼
►
is actually desirable because that's what we're going for.
01:04:05
◼
►
We want everybody to know what Coca-Cola is.
01:04:07
◼
►
We don't care who you are, what you do,
01:04:08
◼
►
what you're interested in,
01:04:09
◼
►
you need to know about Coca-Cola and it's awesome.
01:04:11
◼
►
They want the big numbers.
01:04:14
◼
►
Anything that is acquiring customers,
01:04:16
◼
►
even something like, you know, fracture or whatever,
01:04:19
◼
►
like, I don't think that they,
01:04:22
◼
►
they're not gonna keep the same CPM
01:04:24
◼
►
and pay for a show that gives 100 million people
01:04:26
◼
►
to bankrupt the company, right?
01:04:28
◼
►
And they're not interested,
01:04:30
◼
►
they're not interested in spraying their,
01:04:32
◼
►
like they'd be overpaying because only a small fraction
01:04:34
◼
►
of those people actually interested in signing up
01:04:36
◼
►
would be much better to go on a podcast
01:04:38
◼
►
where a much higher percentage of the people who listen
01:04:40
◼
►
are into digital photography
01:04:42
◼
►
and making prints of it or whatever.
01:04:43
◼
►
So I feel like they wanna get those big advertisers
01:04:46
◼
►
because the number on the check is gonna be really big.
01:04:49
◼
►
And the only people who are gonna write that check
01:04:51
◼
►
are the people who are doing brand advertising.
01:04:53
◼
►
And that's the way you get, again,
01:04:54
◼
►
if you wanna get a podcast that has 200 million downloads
01:04:58
◼
►
for every episode,
01:05:00
◼
►
I think brand advertising is your only path to that.
01:05:03
◼
►
And so they're trying to connect the dots
01:05:06
◼
►
to make that happen.
01:05:07
◼
►
And by the way,
01:05:08
◼
►
like I agree that the way you would get a big podcast
01:05:11
◼
►
like that is you have to get more people
01:05:12
◼
►
listening to the podcast.
01:05:13
◼
►
But the best way to do that
01:05:14
◼
►
is to keep podcasts like the web.
01:05:17
◼
►
The reason everybody can and did eventually come
01:05:20
◼
►
to use the web is because it wasn't controlled
01:05:23
◼
►
by Microsoft or Yahoo or whoever else.
01:05:26
◼
►
Like it was a thing that anyone can implement
01:05:28
◼
►
the web browser and anyone can make a website
01:05:29
◼
►
no one company owns and controls it, that's what let it spread everywhere.
01:05:34
◼
►
If you try to make Apple the king of podcasts or Android the king of podcasts or whatever,
01:05:40
◼
►
you're narrowing the number of people who can listen to podcasts, especially if you
01:05:44
◼
►
pick somebody who has a platform.
01:05:45
◼
►
Because again, say you took iOS or Android and one of them became the only thing in podcasting
01:05:50
◼
►
that mattered, you're cutting off half of the market right there.
01:05:52
◼
►
You want everybody to be able to listen to podcasts really easily, no matter what device
01:05:57
◼
►
they have, whatever weird thing they buy in their house or have on their person or in
01:06:02
◼
►
their car or wherever, you want everybody else in the podcast just like everybody can
01:06:06
◼
►
go to your website.
01:06:07
◼
►
The reason websites have huge amount of traffic is because everybody can go to websites.
01:06:12
◼
►
You don't have to have a special kind of computer or a special operating system or a special
01:06:16
◼
►
application or whatever.
01:06:18
◼
►
Essentially every platform has some way to browse the web.
01:06:21
◼
►
And we're at that point with podcasts now.
01:06:23
◼
►
It's just RSS.
01:06:25
◼
►
you can make a player for it for any type of thing.
01:06:28
◼
►
Any move that big podcasts would do
01:06:31
◼
►
in the hopes of getting like big brand advertising
01:06:33
◼
►
or making a big podcast that tried to make podcasting
01:06:37
◼
►
more narrow in that way is shooting themselves in the foot
01:06:40
◼
►
because those people are out there,
01:06:43
◼
►
you wanna make them be able to listen to podcasts
01:06:46
◼
►
no matter where they are, what they're doing,
01:06:47
◼
►
do not make podcasting tied to a particular store,
01:06:50
◼
►
a particular application or anything like that.
01:06:51
◼
►
That'd be so dumb.
01:06:52
◼
►
This is the beginning of the ad.
01:06:55
◼
►
We are also sponsored this week by Backblaze.
01:06:58
◼
►
Go to backblaze.com/atp for unlimited, un-throttled,
01:07:03
◼
►
native online backup for Mac and PC.
01:07:07
◼
►
There's no credit card required for your 15-day free trial,
01:07:09
◼
►
so go check it out today.
01:07:10
◼
►
Let me tell you why you need online backup.
01:07:12
◼
►
There's so many things that can happen
01:07:14
◼
►
to any backups you keep locally.
01:07:16
◼
►
Theft, floods, power surge, fire.
01:07:19
◼
►
Online backup is a great insurance policy
01:07:21
◼
►
against this kind of risk.
01:07:22
◼
►
And it's really convenient too.
01:07:23
◼
►
So for instance, you can do things like,
01:07:25
◼
►
oh, you know what, I forgot this one spreadsheet
01:07:27
◼
►
I was working on, let me log into Backblaze,
01:07:29
◼
►
pull it off there while I'm on my trip,
01:07:31
◼
►
and you can get it on your phone,
01:07:32
◼
►
your tablet, or your laptop, it's great.
01:07:34
◼
►
I use it for that a lot, very, very nice.
01:07:36
◼
►
I have used many online backup services.
01:07:39
◼
►
Backblaze is the one I stick with.
01:07:40
◼
►
I was a customer of theirs before they were a sponsor.
01:07:43
◼
►
It is so great.
01:07:44
◼
►
We have combined something like four or five terabytes
01:07:48
◼
►
of data backed up to Backblaze because it's unlimited.
01:07:51
◼
►
Five bucks per month per computer.
01:07:54
◼
►
And we have like five terabytes in there so far.
01:07:56
◼
►
It is crazy how good Backblaze is.
01:08:00
◼
►
And in my experience,
01:08:01
◼
►
how much better it is than the competition.
01:08:03
◼
►
Backblaze is great.
01:08:04
◼
►
You can do restores either on the web,
01:08:07
◼
►
or even if you wanna have them mail you a hard drive,
01:08:09
◼
►
you can do that.
01:08:10
◼
►
It will overnight you a hard drive with all your data on it
01:08:12
◼
►
if you don't wanna wait for a big download.
01:08:14
◼
►
And if you return one of those drives by mail
01:08:17
◼
►
within 30 days, you get a refund for the drive.
01:08:20
◼
►
So it's basically a free restore with a mailed hard drive,
01:08:22
◼
►
which is really great.
01:08:24
◼
►
They already have over 200 petabytes of data stored
01:08:27
◼
►
for their customers.
01:08:28
◼
►
They've restored over 10 billion files,
01:08:31
◼
►
and this is a great insurance policy.
01:08:33
◼
►
And you know, online backup,
01:08:35
◼
►
because you have this little bit additional overhead
01:08:37
◼
►
of restoring, I still do recommend having a local backup,
01:08:41
◼
►
something like Time Machine or a Super Duper Clone
01:08:43
◼
►
or something like that, but having backplays as well
01:08:46
◼
►
for the just in case and the convenience
01:08:49
◼
►
of the remote access, I do recommend that,
01:08:51
◼
►
and I do it myself, and it's fantastic.
01:08:53
◼
►
So check it out, there's no gimmicks, there's no charges,
01:08:55
◼
►
five bucks per month per computer,
01:08:58
◼
►
for unlimited, un-throttled, off-site, online backup.
01:09:01
◼
►
Go to backblaze.com/atp, and you will get
01:09:05
◼
►
a free 15-day trial, thanks a lot to Backblaze.
01:09:08
◼
►
- This is the end of the ad.
01:09:09
◼
►
- So we talked about an episode or two ago
01:09:11
◼
►
how I felt like it's been trendy to dislike the Apple Watch.
01:09:15
◼
►
Well, it's been trendy to really, really, really freaking love the Amazon Echo.
01:09:21
◼
►
I do not have one.
01:09:23
◼
►
I don't know that I've ever...
01:09:24
◼
►
I mean, sure, probably.
01:09:28
◼
►
I've never seen one in person to my recollection, but everyone that I know swears by it loves
01:09:34
◼
►
And so it seems like everyone's getting really infatuated with voice-based control.
01:09:39
◼
►
And the people who did Siri, which was, you know, that software was eventually bought
01:09:45
◼
►
up by Apple, and I believe the company was as well.
01:09:48
◼
►
So a lot of the XSiri people have gone on to create Viv, which is kind of the spiritual
01:09:55
◼
►
successor to Siri, and they demoed it on Monday.
01:09:59
◼
►
Now, I didn't have the time to watch the video, but my understanding was this was something
01:10:03
◼
►
pretty darn impressive.
01:10:04
◼
►
- Impressive if you don't think about it too much, I guess.
01:10:08
◼
►
Why do you say that?
01:10:10
◼
►
I have hound. I've seen the the the viv things. I don't maybe maybe this only bothers people like me
01:10:16
◼
►
But on the flip side of it. I think none of these things are up to the point where they pass
01:10:23
◼
►
the regular person
01:10:26
◼
►
thresholds of
01:10:28
◼
►
Magic because as we've discussed many times in the past with Siri the problem with Siri and things like that is
01:10:33
◼
►
And you'll see when you have any kid use Siri for five seconds people immediately jump to oh
01:10:37
◼
►
this is a little person in my computer, but obviously it's not and as soon as they discover
01:10:42
◼
►
the very real and very close limits of any of these things, it breaks the illusion. It's
01:10:47
◼
►
like, oh, I thought this was like a little person on my computer I could talk to. Instead,
01:10:51
◼
►
it's just a crappy program that's like, basically boils down to like playing a text adventure
01:10:56
◼
►
game where you have to learn the syntax and what you can say and what you can't say. And
01:11:00
◼
►
it's disappointing. It's disappointing to people and then they kind of put it in a bin
01:11:03
◼
►
with I thought it was going to be this magical thing where I can talk to a person in my phone
01:11:07
◼
►
really it's just like the voice version of the command line where I have to
01:11:13
◼
►
learn the things that it can do first of all and then I have to learn the ways I
01:11:17
◼
►
can say the things that it can do and granted there are many ways that you can
01:11:20
◼
►
say it maybe more than in the average text adventure but probably about the
01:11:23
◼
►
same as in any good text adventure and the new demo is like showing off context
01:11:28
◼
►
like oh it kind of remembers last thing I said to it so I can refer back to it
01:11:31
◼
►
using you know if I as long as they use the right words and they're the it will
01:11:36
◼
►
understand what I'm talking about and build on my past conversations and it's like I'm having a conversation if you see a demo with a
01:11:42
◼
►
preset script it is it seems to be very impressive until you realize there is only a very small number of things that you can ask about and
01:11:50
◼
►
Those things aren't always
01:11:53
◼
►
interesting do you like it's you want to ask about facts that you can pull out a wall from Afra or
01:11:59
◼
►
Things having to do with the weather or date and time or unit conversions
01:12:03
◼
►
Then you can have this amazing but extremely boring conversation about stuff that you don't really care about but if you really want to know
01:12:09
◼
►
something more complicated
01:12:12
◼
►
You better hope that's within the problem. I mean, I'm not saying well these are bad products. I think they're amazing
01:12:16
◼
►
We need to keep advancing us and it's great
01:12:18
◼
►
But I get like I said as soon as you have a voice talking to you or they can understand what you're saying people
01:12:22
◼
►
Immediately jump to this is how 9000 or like it's a little person, but it's totally an older person
01:12:28
◼
►
It's so far from that that there's always the inevitable
01:12:34
◼
►
So as we continue to March there progress there
01:12:37
◼
►
I'm you know
01:12:37
◼
►
I think that's good
01:12:38
◼
►
But this this slight diversion with Veeve and or Viv or however you want to say it and all those other ones
01:12:44
◼
►
bothers me as the type of person who like reads the wire cutter or
01:12:49
◼
►
Marcos headphones reviews or Marcos light bulb reviews or anything like that and that the the
01:12:55
◼
►
very boldly stated business model of these companies is
01:12:58
◼
►
We will make deals with other companies so you can say
01:13:01
◼
►
you know, have a pizza delivered at my house at 5 p.m. and also send flowers to my mom for Mother's Day.
01:13:06
◼
►
You're like, "Wow, what an amazing demo! It's like having a personal assistant!"
01:13:09
◼
►
But you don't get to pick what pizza it is or what company sends the flowers.
01:13:14
◼
►
The company that makes the product that you're talking to does deals with dominoes and pro flowers,
01:13:20
◼
►
and that's what gets sent. Not because those are the best flowers or because your assistant knows the best flowers to get for your mom
01:13:25
◼
►
or the kind of pizza that you like,
01:13:27
◼
►
But because these are the deals the company whose voice agent that you're talking to made, you know
01:13:32
◼
►
Made partnerships with and so their incentives are all screwed up
01:13:37
◼
►
Their incentives of the supposed personal assistant is not to help you get the things that you want in your life. It's to
01:13:43
◼
►
dutifully follow through on the business deals that the company's made and all these companies are looking for if we make this thing so
01:13:48
◼
►
Sticky that people love talking to it and just like rely on it as part of their life
01:13:52
◼
►
Then we can charge people a lot of money to you know, like the same way that Google can charge money for search results
01:13:58
◼
►
We got everybody typing into our search box now all of a sudden you buy you buy
01:14:02
◼
►
Advertising keywords or search keywords for us. It's very valuable
01:14:05
◼
►
Everybody does all their pizza ordering then we can charge whatever pizza company a lot of money
01:14:09
◼
►
They said did you want on the pizza be the pizza company fulfills pizza requests?
01:14:14
◼
►
You know obviously people like me and I think a lot of people kind of care where their pizza comes from
01:14:19
◼
►
maybe they don't care so much about where the flowers come from, but
01:14:21
◼
►
And the model that they should be presenting is, "Here is an artificially intelligent
01:14:27
◼
►
agent or whatever."
01:14:28
◼
►
The agent's a good 90s Apple thing.
01:14:31
◼
►
The knowledge navigator is going to help you in real life.
01:14:34
◼
►
It's supposed to be helping me.
01:14:35
◼
►
It's supposed to be like I want it to do things that, you know, if it's going to save me work,
01:14:39
◼
►
I would go and figure out what the best dishwasher is and what the comparative features are and
01:14:44
◼
►
stuff like that.
01:14:45
◼
►
Or, you know, I would, if I moved into a new area, I would, you know, troll reviews to
01:14:49
◼
►
to try to find out where do people like, you know,
01:14:52
◼
►
the best pizza or, you know, like ratings or like,
01:14:55
◼
►
I want it to figure out what I want in my life,
01:14:58
◼
►
what my needs are and follow through on that.
01:14:59
◼
►
But I don't know if there's money to be made in that
01:15:01
◼
►
because we're not willing to pay for that service.
01:15:03
◼
►
So someone's got to pay and the people who are paying
01:15:05
◼
►
is Domino's and you're gonna get a stupid Domino's pizza.
01:15:08
◼
►
- So you get what you deserve.
01:15:10
◼
►
- Right, and it's just, it's misaligned incentives,
01:15:12
◼
►
but I don't know the way out of it
01:15:14
◼
►
because aligned incentives would be,
01:15:16
◼
►
you pay me $5 a month for the privilege of using
01:15:18
◼
►
Siri or Veeve and no one wants to do that either because they're not good enough for
01:15:22
◼
►
five dollars a month. It's like, "Nah, I'll just do the web search myself or I'll just
01:15:25
◼
►
go to the wire cutter myself," right? So I don't know how you find your way out of this.
01:15:30
◼
►
It could be, I don't know, it could be that most people are fine with that. They're like,
01:15:34
◼
►
"I don't really want to know or care what deals you make behind the scenes as long as
01:15:38
◼
►
somebody comes and picks up my package. I don't care what they ship it by or anything
01:15:42
◼
►
like just..." They're not as picky. They're not reading reviews about their light bulbs,
01:15:46
◼
►
right? They're just like, "Whatever, it's just convenient for me to be able to do this and I
01:15:50
◼
►
don't really care what company or product is involved in. I don't care what deals are made
01:15:55
◼
►
behind the scenes and I don't care that my needs aren't the most primary thing. It's a service I
01:15:59
◼
►
get for free. It's built into my phone or I yell it into the air and Amazon Echo does it. I don't
01:16:03
◼
►
care that all the products are fulfilled through Amazon or, you know, like it's like pushing that
01:16:06
◼
►
button for paper towels, you know, at least you get to pick because Amazon has a wide variety,
01:16:10
◼
►
but I don't care that they all come from Amazon. Maybe most people are fine with that.
01:16:15
◼
►
But for me personally, I don't like it and I also think that the misaligned incentives will just
01:16:21
◼
►
become a larger and larger problem until and unless these services actually become so good
01:16:27
◼
►
that people are willing to pay for them. Because wouldn't you pay $5 a month to have a personal
01:16:30
◼
►
assistant who you could just shout orders to and would do stuff and was not actually a person,
01:16:34
◼
►
you didn't have to like care about their feelings and well-being or anything? Like that's the dream
01:16:38
◼
►
of artificial intelligence personal assistants from every movie about the future where you just
01:16:41
◼
►
you just yell things into the air and things get done.
01:16:43
◼
►
And wouldn't you love if that assistant
01:16:44
◼
►
learned more about you and about what you like
01:16:47
◼
►
and what you dislike and did the research for you
01:16:49
◼
►
and collaborated with other agents
01:16:51
◼
►
and just sort of asked your reaction
01:16:53
◼
►
to the meal you're just eating
01:16:54
◼
►
instead of you having to hit a star rate.
01:16:56
◼
►
That's the magical future we think about
01:16:58
◼
►
and I think everyone would be willing to pay for that
01:17:00
◼
►
because paying for an actual personal assistant
01:17:01
◼
►
to do all that stuff, it's really expensive.
01:17:03
◼
►
$5 a month looks like a bargain.
01:17:05
◼
►
But we're not there yet,
01:17:07
◼
►
the products just aren't that good.
01:17:08
◼
►
So in the meantime, Domino's will be paying them
01:17:10
◼
►
to deliver you excurable pizza to your house.
01:17:14
◼
►
- I love that your dream scenario here
01:17:16
◼
►
is that you can basically have a virtual person
01:17:21
◼
►
who is totally basically your slave
01:17:23
◼
►
and you can be a jerk to.
01:17:25
◼
►
- It's not actually a person, it's just a computer.
01:17:27
◼
►
But you don't have to be a jerk to it,
01:17:28
◼
►
but you also don't have to worry about,
01:17:30
◼
►
they don't sleep, don't eat, don't get annoyed
01:17:34
◼
►
when you're frustrated, don't get annoyed if you yell,
01:17:36
◼
►
and that's why we use computers,
01:17:38
◼
►
because we don't have to have this constant,
01:17:40
◼
►
we're not trying to emotionally support our computers
01:17:42
◼
►
most of the time.
01:17:43
◼
►
We just want them to do what we tell them to do
01:17:45
◼
►
when we do it, 'cause they're machines
01:17:46
◼
►
and they're not people, right?
01:17:48
◼
►
And that's the dream of having the computers,
01:17:51
◼
►
just think not as a personal assistant,
01:17:53
◼
►
but rather think of it as like using a computer
01:17:58
◼
►
without having to sit in front of a computer
01:17:59
◼
►
and click on things or touch a screen or type things in.
01:18:01
◼
►
You're just talking into the air and then somewhere else,
01:18:03
◼
►
a computer is doing your thing.
01:18:04
◼
►
And the whole machine learning angle,
01:18:07
◼
►
the same way a personal assistant would learn your preferences and everything, that's what
01:18:12
◼
►
computers are great at.
01:18:13
◼
►
That's what Netflix is great at, by seeing what we watch, and we have to help with the
01:18:16
◼
►
silly way of hitting stars and stuff, but eventually Netflix gets good at thinking,
01:18:19
◼
►
"I think you will like this movie based on movies you've seen in the past and have liked."
01:18:25
◼
►
It's incredibly primitive compared to what we could do if we had a conversational, long-term
01:18:29
◼
►
relationship with a voice-controlled thing that was on our side and was entirely made
01:18:35
◼
►
to try to make our lives better, but again, there's no business model for that, and the
01:18:40
◼
►
tech still isn't quite there. But I feel like we can get there eventually. And once we do,
01:18:44
◼
►
someone is going to get $5 a month from a hell of a lot of people once that becomes
01:18:48
◼
►
good enough.
01:18:49
◼
►
Well, but it doesn't have to be that it's $5 a month. I mean, it could be that this
01:18:55
◼
►
future Siri or what have you takes a cut of whatever it facilitates a sale for.
01:19:01
◼
►
So like-- - But that's incentivized
01:19:04
◼
►
to make deals with the highest bidder
01:19:06
◼
►
who makes crappy pizza.
01:19:07
◼
►
In fact, the crappy pizza problem.
01:19:09
◼
►
- Well, perhaps, but first of all,
01:19:10
◼
►
Domino's Pizza is not crappy.
01:19:12
◼
►
Second of all-- - Oh my God, it's so bad.
01:19:14
◼
►
What are you talking about?
01:19:15
◼
►
- Hi, Jon. - Yeah, I'm with Jon.
01:19:16
◼
►
Sorry, Casey, that's just an excuse.
01:19:18
◼
►
- Well, you guys are, you're way too snooty.
01:19:20
◼
►
Anyway, the point is that,
01:19:22
◼
►
why couldn't we have a hypothetical conversation
01:19:25
◼
►
where I say, "Hey, (beep)
01:19:26
◼
►
"I'd like a pizza, please."
01:19:27
◼
►
Sure, where would you like it from?
01:19:29
◼
►
Papa John's or Domino's or what have you mean presumably would have to be some national change, so I'm not it's not
01:19:34
◼
►
But then how do you get paid? How does that service get paid?
01:19:37
◼
►
You think it's just taking a cut of that because they were kind of like grub hub or whatever like they'd have to kind of
01:19:41
◼
►
Opt in the money's got to come from somewhere because unless you want to pay extra for that pizza and like have this you know
01:19:46
◼
►
Siri surcharge of experts because grub hub is so friggin expensive like there's lots of services that kind of do a small portion of what?
01:19:52
◼
►
We would imagine Viva Siri doing but all of them the disincentive is
01:19:56
◼
►
This is great if you have money to burn and you can't be bothered to go someplace and you don't mind your food being
01:20:01
◼
►
Cold by the time it gets here and you don't mind waiting a long time and half the time
01:20:03
◼
►
It doesn't work like this. There's so many caveats, but the the money is a big deterrent
01:20:08
◼
►
Five dollars a month for the blanket service of essentially just connecting the dots to things that you could do themselves
01:20:14
◼
►
That works financially if you have enough people do it as does Domino's being the exclusive will bring you a crappy pizza provider
01:20:21
◼
►
but I feel like the percentage of everything is just back to the grubhub model and it's
01:20:26
◼
►
That has proven to be good for, you know,
01:20:31
◼
►
in my day we would say yuppies,
01:20:32
◼
►
but like good for people who with high paying jobs
01:20:35
◼
►
and not a lot of time and more money,
01:20:39
◼
►
money is less important to them than their time.
01:20:41
◼
►
And so they do that.
01:20:42
◼
►
And even those things you're kind of like,
01:20:45
◼
►
sometimes that just, it's more worth of you
01:20:47
◼
►
to go there yourself and get the thing.
01:20:48
◼
►
I don't know.
01:20:49
◼
►
- Everyone needs to--
01:20:50
◼
►
- Would any of us order pizza in that way?
01:20:53
◼
►
Even if you could like,
01:20:54
◼
►
So if you could tell at the store, but it charged you 20% on top of that, would you
01:20:58
◼
►
order pizza that way?
01:20:59
◼
►
I mean, if I was in a position where I didn't want to sit down at a computer or an iPad
01:21:04
◼
►
or an iPhone, and I just wanted to within 30 seconds say, "Hey, get me..."
01:21:10
◼
►
Oh, I forgot.
01:21:11
◼
►
I can't say that.
01:21:13
◼
►
Well, it's too late now.
01:21:15
◼
►
What did they say on upgrade?
01:21:19
◼
►
I wanted to say Aloha.
01:21:20
◼
►
Aloha, telephone.
01:21:23
◼
►
Get me a pizza, a large pepperoni, no pineapple,
01:21:28
◼
►
pizza from Domino's delivered to my house.
01:21:31
◼
►
- Your bad taste continues.
01:21:33
◼
►
- You're in favor of this bull siri pepperoni in pineapple?
01:21:38
◼
►
- I honestly have not tried pepperoni in pineapple yet,
01:21:40
◼
►
but I do like pineapple and ham.
01:21:42
◼
►
I don't get that a lot in New York
01:21:44
◼
►
'cause they don't really do it here
01:21:45
◼
►
'cause it's not canonical, Jon,
01:21:46
◼
►
but I do enjoy that combo when I can get it.
01:21:50
◼
►
But yeah, normally, I mean I like pepperoni,
01:21:53
◼
►
and I like pineapple, so you know.
01:21:55
◼
►
- There was a ham and pineapple discussion,
01:21:57
◼
►
but I'm not sure if it's on a podcast
01:21:58
◼
►
that has yet to be released.
01:21:59
◼
►
Did you hear me talk about Hawaiian pizza on any podcast?
01:22:02
◼
►
If not, it hasn't been released, so I won't spoil it.
01:22:04
◼
►
- I did hear you talk about it.
01:22:06
◼
►
I forget which show it was on.
01:22:08
◼
►
- Yeah, same here.
01:22:09
◼
►
- It might have been when you guessed it on upgrade.
01:22:10
◼
►
You did that recently, right?
01:22:12
◼
►
- Yeah, maybe that was it.
01:22:12
◼
►
But anyway, yeah, I don't wanna get into it now.
01:22:15
◼
►
- All right, so the point is, the point is.
01:22:16
◼
►
- The point is Casey has terrible taste in pizza,
01:22:19
◼
►
so his answer to this question is irrelevant.
01:22:21
◼
►
- Whatever, if you, Marco and John slash you--
01:22:25
◼
►
- Switch to hamburgers if you need to.
01:22:27
◼
►
- Oh, no, because then I'm gonna tell you
01:22:28
◼
►
I think Wendy's is just fine,
01:22:29
◼
►
and then you're gonna bust my balls about that too.
01:22:31
◼
►
- All right, what are they like in the South?
01:22:32
◼
►
How about barbecue?
01:22:33
◼
►
- Oh, God. - Yeah, would you just get it
01:22:34
◼
►
from Dallas Barbecue because it doesn't matter?
01:22:36
◼
►
- Oh. - Would you say,
01:22:37
◼
►
well, barbecue is barbecue.
01:22:38
◼
►
I mean, I guess Dallas Barbecue is fine.
01:22:40
◼
►
- But for all these things, though,
01:22:42
◼
►
the money's gonna be coming from taking a cut.
01:22:44
◼
►
The money's gotta come from somewhere,
01:22:45
◼
►
so it's gotta be a surcharge, right?
01:22:46
◼
►
Because unless you, you have to have deals
01:22:49
◼
►
If you're going to take a cut, like the price remains the same, but they cut us in, you
01:22:52
◼
►
have to have deals for that.
01:22:53
◼
►
And if you don't, then you just have to add a surcharge because then you don't need deals
01:22:56
◼
►
on either end.
01:22:57
◼
►
But the surcharge is usually pretty significant.
01:23:00
◼
►
And that's in addition to whatever additional things they're charging you to deliver it
01:23:03
◼
►
plus tip and all that other stuff.
01:23:05
◼
►
Well, that's the thing exactly though, because the delivery surcharge is a surcharge.
01:23:09
◼
►
You could, if you wanted, get in your car or ride your bike or walk or what have you
01:23:14
◼
►
and go fetch your pizza.
01:23:17
◼
►
But sometimes you just want the convenience of this meal magically showing up at your
01:23:23
◼
►
I personally cannot imagine a time where I would want to say, "Hey, Ahoy!
01:23:30
◼
►
Get me a Domino's large pizza."
01:23:31
◼
►
But there are certainly people in the world that may be willing to pay a dollar or two,
01:23:37
◼
►
or whatever the case may be, to Ahoy!
01:23:40
◼
►
Themselves a pizza.
01:23:41
◼
►
I mean, Domino's lets you order pizza with emoji by some mechanism I've never tried.
01:23:45
◼
►
So I would imagine that there are people
01:23:47
◼
►
that are doing that too.
01:23:48
◼
►
- You ever wonder why Domino's has to make it so easy
01:23:51
◼
►
to order their pizza?
01:23:53
◼
►
- You know, fine, okay.
01:23:54
◼
►
If you wanna believe Domino's is gross, that's fine.
01:23:57
◼
►
All I know is, just listen to the forthcoming episode
01:24:00
◼
►
of Analog where we probably won't cut the discussion
01:24:03
◼
►
about people that are too good for chain restaurants
01:24:06
◼
►
and how much I hate all of them,
01:24:07
◼
►
which is basically everyone in the chat room
01:24:09
◼
►
and the two of you.
01:24:10
◼
►
- There are good chain restaurants.
01:24:12
◼
►
There just are very few good chain pizza restaurants
01:24:14
◼
►
and I think most of them would be local chains
01:24:16
◼
►
that you wouldn't have heard of.
01:24:18
◼
►
But it's fine, no it's fine.
01:24:19
◼
►
Also, if you're gonna have chain pizza,
01:24:21
◼
►
I'm not sure Domino's is even the best one of those.
01:24:24
◼
►
- Well what would it be?
01:24:25
◼
►
- I was always a bigger fan of like the really crappy ones,
01:24:28
◼
►
like Little Caesars or Pizza Hut,
01:24:30
◼
►
because it's like, - Come on, what are you doing?
01:24:32
◼
►
- If you're gonna go with some really crappy
01:24:34
◼
►
big brand pizza, you might as well go like super crappy
01:24:38
◼
►
and get like all the junk food value of it.
01:24:41
◼
►
- I feel like I would get something frozen
01:24:43
◼
►
the supermarket before I would take the delivery from any chain.
01:24:47
◼
►
Yeah, I did a lot of those too.
01:24:48
◼
►
Like a lot of like the big- And those are not good.
01:24:50
◼
►
Don't get me wrong, they are terrible.
01:24:52
◼
►
That's how bad I think the delivery is.
01:24:53
◼
►
You would take a Red Baron pizza over Domino's.
01:24:56
◼
►
Not Red Baron, but maybe something else.
01:24:59
◼
►
What is the thing that's not delivery?
01:25:01
◼
►
It's DiGiorno.
01:25:02
◼
►
Man, that marketing works.
01:25:04
◼
►
That would kind of be like a match-up.
01:25:06
◼
►
Like even- Anyway, like we shouldn't have gotten to the pizza topic.
01:25:11
◼
►
How is it so- Why?
01:25:13
◼
►
So moving on from-- - I can't imagine.
01:25:15
◼
►
No, I can't get past this.
01:25:17
◼
►
I can't imagine a world where somebody says,
01:25:20
◼
►
"Man, I'd really like some pizza,
01:25:22
◼
►
"and I'd like to get Domino's."
01:25:25
◼
►
And you have to be like, "Mm, Domino's is not good enough
01:25:29
◼
►
"for me, I'm sorry, we're gonna have to go somewhere else."
01:25:31
◼
►
- Well, you know, sometimes you have to eat things
01:25:33
◼
►
you don't like, but I think, I'm even,
01:25:36
◼
►
this is more of an issue for me even than Marco's thing,
01:25:37
◼
►
'cause Marco's like, he has this fancy coffee, right?
01:25:39
◼
►
But when he's on the road, he'll get Starbucks.
01:25:41
◼
►
- Yeah. - Precisely.
01:25:42
◼
►
When I'm on the road, the equivalent of me is I would choose not to have coffee.
01:25:46
◼
►
Sometimes I do.
01:25:47
◼
►
Like that's the level I'm at with…
01:25:49
◼
►
Same thing with pizza and bagel.
01:25:50
◼
►
I just don't get pizza if I can't get good pizza.
01:25:54
◼
►
And it's fine.
01:25:55
◼
►
I eat something else.
01:25:56
◼
►
And if someone else gets bad pizza, I'll eat it.
01:25:57
◼
►
You know, you gotta eat to stay alive, right?
01:25:59
◼
►
But I will never choose it.
01:26:00
◼
►
Whereas Marco, because he's addicted, will choose to get Starbucks because it's like,
01:26:05
◼
►
"Well, it's better than no coffee."
01:26:06
◼
►
But no, it's not better than no pizza.
01:26:08
◼
►
No pizza beats Domino's pizza.
01:26:11
◼
►
If I, listeners, if I ever get to the point that I'm this fussy about fricking anything...
01:26:16
◼
►
It's not fussy, it's just like, it's just a preference.
01:26:19
◼
►
Like I don't consider it the same category of food.
01:26:21
◼
►
It's like I'll just pick a different—there's plenty of kind of foods to choose from.
01:26:24
◼
►
Like I'm not that picky about burgers, right?
01:26:27
◼
►
Many more options for burgers, including ones from chains and lots of things from chains,
01:26:30
◼
►
but when it comes to pizza, I will just pick a different food product.
01:26:33
◼
►
And I don't think it's being snobbish, it's just kind of like that's—I don't like that.
01:26:37
◼
►
Doesn't taste good to me.
01:26:38
◼
►
I don't want it.
01:26:40
◼
►
and I don't need it for chemical reasons,
01:26:41
◼
►
so I will just pick something else.
01:26:44
◼
►
I'd rather have a sandwich from Subway than bad pizza.
01:26:46
◼
►
- Oh, I don't know about that.
01:26:47
◼
►
- And sandwiches from Subway are probably
01:26:50
◼
►
the bottom rung of thing that you can call sandwich.
01:26:53
◼
►
As people know in the chat room,
01:26:54
◼
►
we've lost the Domino's brand sponsorship
01:26:56
◼
►
and we're losing the Subway brand sponsorship
01:26:58
◼
►
from the show, it's fine.
01:26:59
◼
►
- This is why we can't have brand advertisers in podcasts
01:27:01
◼
►
'cause we've already pissed off all the brands.
01:27:03
◼
►
- We'll take Waffle House sponsorships though,
01:27:05
◼
►
because I feel like they embrace what they are.
01:27:08
◼
►
- I'm more of a steak and shake person myself,
01:27:10
◼
►
I don't even understand why Subway is so bad. You're watching them create it in front of you.
01:27:16
◼
►
You don't understand why Subway is bad? Please, Casey, please stop. Please stop.
01:27:20
◼
►
No, I'm trying to help you here.
01:27:23
◼
►
I don't want your help.
01:27:25
◼
►
Subway is not the hill you want to die on.
01:27:27
◼
►
No, I'm not saying that it's the hill I want to die on. I don't want your help.
01:27:30
◼
►
I want to be able to go to any friggin restaurant I want and be
01:27:34
◼
►
genuinely happy with the meal I've had. I have gone to Subway, although not lately, and been
01:27:39
◼
►
Genuinely happy with the meal I've had are there better sandwiches in the world abso-freakin-lutely does that count as a restaurant sure oh
01:27:46
◼
►
I haven't been this angry at you two since the Mac Pro discussions
01:27:50
◼
►
Just if I ever get this fussy and high-maintenance just kick me in the shins
01:27:57
◼
►
What vodka would you drink Casey would you drink that they hit the big handle of like the cheap Russian?
01:28:02
◼
►
Whatever vodka that comes in the plastic bottle would you drink that he just got to run it through Brita filters, and it's fine
01:28:06
◼
►
How do you know that, John?
01:28:10
◼
►
No, you weren't privy to this.
01:28:12
◼
►
Because it's the stupid secret of vodkas.
01:28:14
◼
►
Once I saw that, I don't drink anything about it, but once I saw that thing with the filters,
01:28:19
◼
►
I'm like, "All right, everyone who deals with vodkas just..."
01:28:21
◼
►
I thought that was BS.
01:28:22
◼
►
I know exactly what you're referring to, but I thought that was BS.
01:28:25
◼
►
Maybe it is BS.
01:28:26
◼
►
I might be wrong.
01:28:27
◼
►
I'm entirely willing to believe it, especially with alcohol.
01:28:30
◼
►
After the first few drinks anyway, you can just secretly switch to the crappier stuff,
01:28:34
◼
►
and no one cares.
01:28:35
◼
►
Well, that's true.
01:28:36
◼
►
Here's the thing, I would absolutely choose a fussy vodka like Tito's if I had the choice,
01:28:41
◼
►
but if I don't have the choice, or if I'm, like a rail vodka's on happy hour, you know
01:28:45
◼
►
what you do?
01:28:46
◼
►
You just put a couple lemons in there, wait a second to get a little bit watered down
01:28:49
◼
►
with a little bit of lemon in it, and then you're fine.
01:28:52
◼
►
I'd prefer the Tito's for sure, but I am perfectly happy with a slightly watered down, slightly
01:28:57
◼
►
lemony vodka, and I'd be happier about that having saved a bunch of money off getting
01:29:03
◼
►
a rail one instead of a Tito's, I would be happy with that. Although that is the best
01:29:08
◼
►
example I've heard so far of me being fussy.
01:29:11
◼
►
Wouldn't you ruin like a $13 Brita filter by converting your cheaper vodka into $13
01:29:17
◼
►
more expensive vodka?
01:29:18
◼
►
You'd still come out ahead if you run it through enough times so it's equivalent to like the
01:29:23
◼
►
$500 bottle.
01:29:25
◼
►
Is there $500 vodka? Vodka's not that good.
01:29:27
◼
►
I'm sure there is. I'm absolutely sure there is.
01:29:29
◼
►
Oh, there absolutely is. And I should also note that my fussy vodka, Tito's, is like the cheapest of the fussy vodkas.
01:29:36
◼
►
Which is part of the reason why I like it so much.
01:29:38
◼
►
Yeah, I remember when you were coming over and we bought a bottle so that you would not judge our vodka collection because you're so judgy of things.
01:29:45
◼
►
I remember being very surprised how inexpensive it was, because the way you talked about it, I thought it would be like a really premium priced one.
01:29:52
◼
►
But nope, turns out vodka's just terrible, so nobody prices it very high.
01:29:55
◼
►
- It's not terrible.
01:29:57
◼
►
Are you a gin drinker?
01:29:58
◼
►
You are a gin drinker, aren't you?
01:30:00
◼
►
Oh, how's your grass taste?
01:30:02
◼
►
- I occasionally drink gin.
01:30:04
◼
►
Not by itself.
01:30:05
◼
►
I mean, I prefer gin-based drinks like Martini's
01:30:07
◼
►
to drinking it straight, but.
01:30:09
◼
►
- Oh, God, a gin Martini.
01:30:11
◼
►
I forgot. - Honestly,
01:30:11
◼
►
I'm not that much of a liquor person.
01:30:13
◼
►
I much prefer either not drinking or drinking beer.
01:30:16
◼
►
- Oh, so you like to drink your bread.
01:30:17
◼
►
I understand.
01:30:18
◼
►
I'm gonna get so much angry email,
01:30:21
◼
►
I'm gonna have to quit the show.
01:30:23
◼
►
It's gonna be the worst.
01:30:24
◼
►
- I tried to help you with the subway thing,
01:30:26
◼
►
it's not too late to ask Marco to cut it out.
01:30:29
◼
►
- Oh, this is staying in.
01:30:31
◼
►
- No, you can let it stay in.
01:30:32
◼
►
- Try to get this back on the rails slightly.
01:30:34
◼
►
I will say, John, you were seemingly puzzled
01:30:37
◼
►
by the idea of why would somebody pay a 20% premium
01:30:41
◼
►
for the convenience of ordering through this,
01:30:42
◼
►
through a cylinder robot voice.
01:30:44
◼
►
- Not why, but that your audience is limited.
01:30:47
◼
►
Because I know those services exist
01:30:48
◼
►
and I know the people who use them,
01:30:49
◼
►
but they're never gonna be mass market
01:30:50
◼
►
because 20% is just too much for most people.
01:30:53
◼
►
- I'll tell you what though.
01:30:54
◼
►
I would probably pay roughly that premium
01:30:57
◼
►
to avoid talking to somebody on the phone.
01:31:00
◼
►
- I hear ya.
01:31:01
◼
►
- Again, yeah, I know, I understand.
01:31:03
◼
►
- If that was my only alternative,
01:31:05
◼
►
'cause a lot of the places around here,
01:31:07
◼
►
in the area that I think Jon and the both of us live in,
01:31:11
◼
►
there's not a lot of chains present.
01:31:13
◼
►
And a lot of the places you order from
01:31:14
◼
►
are just independently owned places.
01:31:16
◼
►
And so anything that relies on really convenient,
01:31:21
◼
►
you can order with our app or things like that,
01:31:23
◼
►
most of the places around here don't support that
01:31:24
◼
►
'cause they're not a big enough operation
01:31:27
◼
►
to be integrated that way or to have their own app
01:31:29
◼
►
or whatever else, which means A,
01:31:31
◼
►
I can't use Apple Pay anywhere.
01:31:33
◼
►
I can't even use my chip card anywhere
01:31:36
◼
►
in most places either.
01:31:37
◼
►
And B, they don't support any of these
01:31:41
◼
►
automated ways of ordering.
01:31:42
◼
►
So if I wanna order something,
01:31:43
◼
►
I'm still doing it the way the San Francisco people think
01:31:45
◼
►
is barbaric of calling them on the phone
01:31:49
◼
►
and placing an order for delivery
01:31:50
◼
►
or going and picking it up in my car.
01:31:52
◼
►
And I hate talking on the phone so much, especially--
01:31:57
◼
►
- Nerdy introverts with disposable income,
01:31:59
◼
►
again, it's a narrow market.
01:32:01
◼
►
Like, the potential for agents
01:32:03
◼
►
that can do things conversationally
01:32:06
◼
►
without you having to type things or really pay attention,
01:32:09
◼
►
just yelling commands out into the air,
01:32:10
◼
►
the potential for that is mass market.
01:32:12
◼
►
But the number of people who are currently willing
01:32:15
◼
►
to pay to avoid phone calls and stuff,
01:32:19
◼
►
and don't blink at 20% is just too small.
01:32:23
◼
►
Like, and I feel these things with the,
01:32:25
◼
►
that's another ding against these things
01:32:29
◼
►
that are funded by having deals
01:32:31
◼
►
with providers of their services,
01:32:34
◼
►
is that exactly the people who are the nerdy introvert,
01:32:37
◼
►
people who don't wanna make phone calls,
01:32:39
◼
►
those are exactly the people who read the wire cutter
01:32:41
◼
►
and obsess over which light bulbs they're gonna get.
01:32:43
◼
►
And those people will not be happy
01:32:45
◼
►
not being able to choose who provides their flowers
01:32:47
◼
►
or even who gives them their weather report.
01:32:50
◼
►
Those are exactly the people who want the thing that's
01:32:52
◼
►
going to use big data to figure out what the best whatever is
01:32:57
◼
►
and learn your preferences and do all that stuff.
01:32:59
◼
►
They don't want to be hemmed into particular vendors.
01:33:04
◼
►
And so maybe Veeve is just hoping
01:33:06
◼
►
to be purchased by Apple or Google or Alphabet or whatever.
01:33:11
◼
►
And that's their big exit plan there.
01:33:13
◼
►
but I am not a fan of this model where
01:33:16
◼
►
the product isn't good enough for users to pay for it yet.
01:33:20
◼
►
And the way they make their money is with back end deals.
01:33:23
◼
►
And you have this agent who you can't,
01:33:25
◼
►
you have this personal assistant
01:33:26
◼
►
who can do a limited number of things.
01:33:28
◼
►
Hopefully if you get the syntax right
01:33:30
◼
►
and you have no control of or awareness over the companies
01:33:34
◼
►
that are fulfilling the things
01:33:37
◼
►
and seemingly no way to give feedback
01:33:38
◼
►
about how well it went when the pizza arrived.
01:33:40
◼
►
Did you like it or did you not like it?
01:33:41
◼
►
you could just say get me a pizza,
01:33:42
◼
►
but not from that last place 'cause it was gross.
01:33:45
◼
►
- So going back to the original topic here
01:33:47
◼
►
of these voice assistant things,
01:33:49
◼
►
I think there's a lot more to discuss here,
01:33:50
◼
►
which we probably don't have time for today, honestly.
01:33:52
◼
►
There's a lot more to discuss here
01:33:53
◼
►
about just how these things are
01:33:55
◼
►
and the kind of ecosystem around this.
01:33:57
◼
►
First of all, I think it would be a hilarious business model
01:34:00
◼
►
if the Siri founders just kept making things,
01:34:03
◼
►
selling them to Apple,
01:34:04
◼
►
and then just quitting and making the next thing,
01:34:07
◼
►
and then Apple buys that one.
01:34:09
◼
►
- People do that all the time.
01:34:10
◼
►
That's the serial entrepreneur thing.
01:34:11
◼
►
You make a startup, you know exactly what to make,
01:34:14
◼
►
and you know that you have multiple potential buyers,
01:34:17
◼
►
you play them off each other, you sell, you do the next one.
01:34:19
◼
►
And what you get to do, I guess, is during all that time,
01:34:21
◼
►
do the fun part that you like, starting the company,
01:34:24
◼
►
doing the exciting thing or whatever,
01:34:25
◼
►
and you just have exit after exit.
01:34:27
◼
►
That's the way some people live their lives.
01:34:29
◼
►
Totally viable business model, especially in this case.
01:34:33
◼
►
- So I do think, getting back,
01:34:35
◼
►
'cause it wouldn't be an episode of this show
01:34:37
◼
►
without a complaint about Apple.
01:34:38
◼
►
- We almost made it.
01:34:39
◼
►
I know, I'm a little bit worried that this is an area
01:34:42
◼
►
where Apple started this game, really.
01:34:46
◼
►
Apple came out with Siri in 2011, right?
01:34:52
◼
►
And Apple started this whole thing, really.
01:34:56
◼
►
There was voice command stuff before that,
01:34:58
◼
►
but Siri took it to another level
01:35:00
◼
►
and integrated it with the phone.
01:35:02
◼
►
It was a big deal.
01:35:04
◼
►
And then since then, Siri has advanced,
01:35:06
◼
►
but fairly slowly and in fairly small steps.
01:35:10
◼
►
While at the same time, it seems like now
01:35:15
◼
►
there are multiple companies.
01:35:17
◼
►
There's Amazon, there's How, Hound, sorry.
01:35:20
◼
►
Amazon, Hound, V, Vive, Viv.
01:35:22
◼
►
There's all these companies now coming out
01:35:25
◼
►
with even better stuff that's like,
01:35:28
◼
►
it seemed like a generation ahead of Siri
01:35:30
◼
►
in like the intelligence and the recognition
01:35:32
◼
►
and the accuracy and things like that.
01:35:34
◼
►
It seems like Apple kind of started this
01:35:36
◼
►
and now everyone's kind of overrunning them,
01:35:38
◼
►
and I don't think Apple is hustling.
01:35:41
◼
►
I've used this word before,
01:35:44
◼
►
that it seems like Apple recently lacks hustle.
01:35:47
◼
►
This isn't the only area that this applies to,
01:35:49
◼
►
where Apple kind of starts something,
01:35:51
◼
►
and then everyone else kind of rushes in
01:35:53
◼
►
and does their own version of it better,
01:35:55
◼
►
and Apple just kind of can't keep up.
01:35:57
◼
►
Is this a problem?
01:35:58
◼
►
- Well, I wouldn't call it hustle in this case.
01:36:00
◼
►
Do you remember when Jobs can, the ATG,
01:36:04
◼
►
Apple Technology Group or Advanced Technology Group.
01:36:06
◼
►
I forget what ATG stands for.
01:36:08
◼
►
Someone who works at Apple.
01:36:10
◼
►
But anyway, Apple used to do way more
01:36:12
◼
►
basic research type stuff.
01:36:13
◼
►
Like that whole department whose job was to do
01:36:16
◼
►
basic research type things and in theory,
01:36:20
◼
►
maybe they would come up with a couple ideas
01:36:21
◼
►
that other groups in the company
01:36:23
◼
►
that made actual products would do.
01:36:24
◼
►
And Steve Jobs concentrated the whole company.
01:36:25
◼
►
I'm like, no, don't do pie in the sky.
01:36:28
◼
►
Wouldn't it be cool if,
01:36:29
◼
►
let's investigate this kind of technology type thing.
01:36:31
◼
►
I mean, Brett Victor used to work at Apple
01:36:33
◼
►
for crying out loud, right?
01:36:34
◼
►
And Jobs is like, no, we want to make great products
01:36:36
◼
►
that ship now.
01:36:37
◼
►
And they've done that, and that's a very successful
01:36:39
◼
►
advanced technology group, the helpful Casey List
01:36:42
◼
►
as in the chat room.
01:36:46
◼
►
We want to make actual products,
01:36:49
◼
►
because it doesn't do anybody good
01:36:51
◼
►
to have these research ideas,
01:36:52
◼
►
and maybe one of them shows up many years later.
01:36:55
◼
►
But things like Siri, that's the only real way
01:36:58
◼
►
you advance that is with some amount of basic research.
01:37:01
◼
►
So it feels like Apple found a company
01:37:03
◼
►
was doing this thing, whatever the SRI company or whatever company Siri came from, that already
01:37:06
◼
►
had done the basic research, acquired them, productized it, and is working the improvements
01:37:12
◼
►
to Siri you're talking about, a lot of them have to do with productized improvements,
01:37:16
◼
►
make it more reliable, make it faster, build it on a different platform, but the basic
01:37:20
◼
►
research needed to take Siri to the next level, I don't know if that is budgeted for or accounted
01:37:24
◼
►
for or dealt with within the realm of the Siri, the product. So they feel like they're
01:37:29
◼
►
advancing the product, and meanwhile the founders have left because they're like, "I don't
01:37:32
◼
►
to just incrementally advance this product
01:37:34
◼
►
or make it more reliable or faster.
01:37:35
◼
►
Like that's your problem, I'm not interested in that.
01:37:37
◼
►
I'm interested in how do you make
01:37:38
◼
►
the next great personal assistant or whatever.
01:37:42
◼
►
And the fact that they felt like
01:37:44
◼
►
they had to leave Apple to do that,
01:37:46
◼
►
I mean, maybe they're misinformed
01:37:48
◼
►
and really there was a place in Apple
01:37:50
◼
►
for them to do that basic research
01:37:51
◼
►
and it should have been part of the plan or whatever.
01:37:52
◼
►
But the Apple of today is much less focused
01:37:55
◼
►
on basic research stuff.
01:37:58
◼
►
And they do, like the things they do,
01:38:00
◼
►
like all that research into touch screens
01:38:01
◼
►
and stuff like that, that's not the same as basic research.
01:38:03
◼
►
It's more like pre-production product things,
01:38:07
◼
►
like ideas for future concrete products.
01:38:09
◼
►
And again, I think this is a great strategy
01:38:11
◼
►
and it gives you great products
01:38:12
◼
►
instead of just great concept videos
01:38:13
◼
►
that don't actually lead to anything.
01:38:14
◼
►
It's been the cornerstone of Apple's success,
01:38:16
◼
►
so you can't really fault them for that.
01:38:17
◼
►
But I think it's also the reason that Google,
01:38:20
◼
►
who does tons of crazy ideas and basic research stuff
01:38:23
◼
►
in-house that just never goes anywhere,
01:38:24
◼
►
which we criticize them for,
01:38:26
◼
►
and startups, who their whole point is like,
01:38:28
◼
►
oh, you have a great idea, let's see it.
01:38:29
◼
►
And half of them die and you don't care,
01:38:31
◼
►
but if any of them end up being successful,
01:38:32
◼
►
as we said before, Apple can just buy them again.
01:38:35
◼
►
That I think is actually a viable strategy.
01:38:37
◼
►
Like if they can't or don't want to support
01:38:42
◼
►
that type of advancement in-house,
01:38:44
◼
►
allow it to flourish out in the market,
01:38:46
◼
►
wait for all the crappy ones to die,
01:38:48
◼
►
find the ones that are left and buy them at the right time
01:38:50
◼
►
because one thing Apple does have is a lot of money.
01:38:52
◼
►
So maybe Apple buys Viv
01:38:54
◼
►
and the next version of Siri is powered by that.
01:38:56
◼
►
And who can say that's a bad strategy?
01:38:58
◼
►
It's just uncomfortable during this time now
01:39:00
◼
►
where we see like, seemingly everybody else
01:39:03
◼
►
can do Siri better than Apple can.
01:39:05
◼
►
And Apple is just barely working on,
01:39:07
◼
►
can we make existing Siri reliable and a little bit smarter
01:39:10
◼
►
and expand the capabilities.
01:39:12
◼
►
And by the way, still no API,
01:39:13
◼
►
so no real ecosystem or whatever.
01:39:15
◼
►
And that I think is uncomfortable,
01:39:16
◼
►
but I don't think it's insurmountable
01:39:17
◼
►
because you just throw money at whatever
01:39:20
◼
►
the most successful thing is.
01:39:21
◼
►
The problem is if Google is the one who does the,
01:39:24
◼
►
Siri better than Siri, which arguably they already have,
01:39:27
◼
►
'cause Google is not gonna sell you their stuff.
01:39:28
◼
►
So that's a problem for Apple,
01:39:29
◼
►
but Viv or Veve is not a problem for Apple.
01:39:33
◼
►
It's an opportunity.
01:39:35
◼
►
- I'm going with Vive.
01:39:37
◼
►
- No, that's the HTC VR thing.
01:39:40
◼
►
- Yeah, but I'm never gonna get that.
01:39:41
◼
►
- Or is that Veve too?
01:39:42
◼
►
I don't even know.
01:39:43
◼
►
- That's Viv.
01:39:44
◼
►
All right, thanks a lot for our three sponsors this week.
01:39:46
◼
►
Fracture, FreshBooks, and Backblaze,
01:39:48
◼
►
and we will see you next week.
01:39:50
◼
►
(upbeat music)
01:39:53
◼
►
Now the show is over, they didn't even mean to begin
01:39:57
◼
►
'Cause it was accidental (accidental)
01:40:00
◼
►
Oh, it was accidental (accidental)
01:40:03
◼
►
John didn't do any research, Marco and Casey wouldn't let him
01:40:08
◼
►
'Cause it was accidental (accidental)
01:40:11
◼
►
Oh, it was accidental (accidental)
01:40:13
◼
►
And you can find the show notes at ATP.fm
01:40:19
◼
►
And if you're into Twitter, you can follow them
01:40:23
◼
►
@C-A-S-E-Y-L-I-S-S
01:40:28
◼
►
So that's Kasey Liss, M-A-R-C-O-A-R-M
01:40:32
◼
►
Auntie Marco Arment, S-I-R-A-C
01:40:37
◼
►
USA, Syracuse
01:40:39
◼
►
It's accidental
01:40:43
◼
►
They didn't mean to
01:40:48
◼
►
Tech Podcast so long
01:40:52
◼
►
So Instagram changed their icon and everyone lost their I don't like the icon that much but I don't think it's the total dumpster fire
01:40:59
◼
►
That everyone else it's pretty bad. It's pretty bad. Remember when web 2.0 was a thing you guys remember web 2.0
01:41:04
◼
►
Yeah gradients and rounded corners. Yeah, the web 2.0 parody sites that would like make fun of all the design tropes
01:41:10
◼
►
The Instagram icon looks like a modern version of making fun of the flat design tropes
01:41:18
◼
►
I could see that like if you tried to do a parody icon of like imagine the Instagram icon
01:41:23
◼
►
Adopted all of the current fashion trends in the most obvious and glaring ways you would get that stupid thing
01:41:29
◼
►
But I don't think it's that bad. I mean, it's not as bad as Domino's Pizza or vodka
01:41:33
◼
►
Like it's it's fine. Whatever like it has some things going for it
01:41:38
◼
►
Especially we look at their alternate designs and how boring some of those were I like the design that was like a a black
01:41:44
◼
►
Square with a white circle in the middle of it. It's like just you know, let's workshop that a little bit more
01:41:48
◼
►
At least this one has something to it. It will stand out a
01:41:52
◼
►
Little bit on people's screens because it's not just a flat color
01:41:57
◼
►
like as so many people have said on Twitter and
01:42:01
◼
►
As I've said about Windows XP at bumper sounds in the end. It doesn't matter that much
01:42:05
◼
►
Because long term eventually you will come to associate with whatever the hell image they make you will come to associate that with Instagram and kids
01:42:12
◼
►
who are just getting their first iPhones now who don't know what the old icon look like will be fine with it and it will
01:42:16
◼
►
just cruise in but
01:42:18
◼
►
It is not the type of I think
01:42:20
◼
►
That that explains why it's not a disaster
01:42:25
◼
►
But I think you can also have an icon that the initial impression is that it's a nice well-designed pleasing icon
01:42:33
◼
►
And it also will come to be associated with the application that you know and love like you don't have to it's not as if it's
01:42:38
◼
►
An either/or well, you can have an icon that is immediately attractive, but it will be crap long term
01:42:42
◼
►
No, it'll also be good long-term.
01:42:44
◼
►
So I feel like this one is a missed opportunity
01:42:48
◼
►
to make a better icon, and I don't particularly like it,
01:42:50
◼
►
but it'll be fine.
01:42:51
◼
►
It's not disastrous.
01:42:52
◼
►
Like, what was the disastrous one?
01:42:54
◼
►
Like when they tried to do the Tropicana orange juice
01:42:56
◼
►
and they backpedaled on it?
01:42:57
◼
►
You always know it's disastrous if they change their mind.
01:42:58
◼
►
So come back in two shows from now
01:43:01
◼
►
and see if they change the icon back,
01:43:02
◼
►
but I have a feeling they won't
01:43:03
◼
►
because it's not that bad.
01:43:04
◼
►
- The other changes they've made recently are more offensive.
01:43:08
◼
►
The icon, like they replaced one crap icon
01:43:11
◼
►
with another crap icon.
01:43:13
◼
►
Like the old icon was crap too.
01:43:15
◼
►
It was just--
01:43:15
◼
►
- It wasn't crap, that had a really good branding.
01:43:18
◼
►
Like it was--
01:43:19
◼
►
- Yeah, it looked great in iOS 6.
01:43:21
◼
►
- Right, and it stayed a long time,
01:43:23
◼
►
but at a certain point, when you're the last one standing,
01:43:25
◼
►
I think it becomes sort of an act of defiance
01:43:29
◼
►
or like a quirk, and you know,
01:43:31
◼
►
only one icon gets to do that.
01:43:34
◼
►
You can't have a home screen that has like six icons
01:43:36
◼
►
that still look like iOS 6, but if only one does it,
01:43:39
◼
►
you're like, all right, sure, go with that.
01:43:41
◼
►
But yeah, it did need to be updated
01:43:43
◼
►
and they had a difficult challenge.
01:43:44
◼
►
But inside the app I actually like.
01:43:46
◼
►
I like the fact that it doesn't look like
01:43:48
◼
►
the central item on the toolbar is constantly selected.
01:43:51
◼
►
I like the fact that stupid blue is gone.
01:43:53
◼
►
I'm a pretty big fan.
01:43:54
◼
►
- Yeah, I completely agree.
01:43:56
◼
►
I really, really like the new look of the app.
01:44:00
◼
►
And I think you and I are mostly
01:44:02
◼
►
on the same page about the icon.
01:44:04
◼
►
Like I don't love it, but I don't think it's bad.
01:44:07
◼
►
And I also didn't think the last one was bad.
01:44:09
◼
►
Yes, it looked outdated, but I completely concur
01:44:11
◼
►
that the branding was great.
01:44:13
◼
►
I think I would have preferred just a flattened
01:44:15
◼
►
or perhaps simplified, a simplified version
01:44:19
◼
►
of the old icon, but--
01:44:21
◼
►
- That would have been pretty timid though.
01:44:22
◼
►
If they did that, everyone would have been like,
01:44:25
◼
►
like, oh, you did the obvious thing.
01:44:27
◼
►
You just made a flat shaded version of the camera.
01:44:29
◼
►
And I think that would be more difficult.
01:44:31
◼
►
I think that would actually be less successful than this
01:44:33
◼
►
because although it may be immediately kind of inoffensive,
01:44:37
◼
►
you won't have gone anywhere.
01:44:38
◼
►
this at least is, you know,
01:44:41
◼
►
you can tell they made a change.
01:44:42
◼
►
It's not like, oh, it's a subtle tweak.
01:44:44
◼
►
Nope, big change.
01:44:45
◼
►
- Well, and on top of that,
01:44:46
◼
►
this icon definitely stands out,
01:44:48
◼
►
which presumably is the goal, right?
01:44:51
◼
►
It's not another damn blue icon.
01:44:53
◼
►
You know, it's something that is a color palette
01:44:56
◼
►
that looks different than anything else
01:44:59
◼
►
I have on my home screen.
01:45:01
◼
►
And of course, that may not be true for everyone,
01:45:03
◼
►
but it's certainly the case on my phone.
01:45:04
◼
►
I mean, it jumps out at me on my home screen.
01:45:07
◼
►
It is on my very, very first home screen
01:45:09
◼
►
because that's how much I love this damn app.
01:45:12
◼
►
So I think the icon's okay.
01:45:15
◼
►
I'm sure I'll come to think it's decent over time,
01:45:18
◼
►
like you had said, Jon, but I completely, completely agree.
01:45:21
◼
►
I love the muted look of the app itself
01:45:25
◼
►
so that damn near all the color is either profile pictures
01:45:29
◼
►
or the actual photos on Instagram.
01:45:31
◼
►
I really, really like it.
01:45:33
◼
►
- I wish I could pay money to get rid of the ads, though.
01:45:35
◼
►
The ads in my Instagram feed are just oppressive.
01:45:39
◼
►
Maybe I don't follow enough people,
01:45:40
◼
►
but it seems like every fifth thing is a giant ad.
01:45:42
◼
►
I'm seeing, or rather scrolling past without looking,
01:45:46
◼
►
way too many frigging ads in Instagram.
01:45:48
◼
►
Please, I will give you,
01:45:50
◼
►
I guess I would give them a dollar a month.
01:45:52
◼
►
Maybe that's not worth it to them.
01:45:53
◼
►
So I'll just continue to scroll past the ads.
01:45:55
◼
►
But I know some people are like,
01:45:55
◼
►
"Oh, I don't see any ads in my feed."
01:45:57
◼
►
And I don't know what algorithm I've tripped
01:45:59
◼
►
to make them spam me with ads like crazy,
01:46:00
◼
►
but too many, too many ads.
01:46:04
◼
►
- Yeah, I mean, for a while I had no ads and it was great.
01:46:07
◼
►
Then a few months ago I started getting
01:46:09
◼
►
a very heavy ad load like we were describing
01:46:11
◼
►
and it really almost ruined Instagram for me.
01:46:14
◼
►
And I didn't go back for a while.
01:46:16
◼
►
I guess my engagement dropped.
01:46:18
◼
►
And then recently I just kinda stopped seeing ads.
01:46:21
◼
►
It flipped back off for me.
01:46:23
◼
►
But the other day, about two days ago,
01:46:27
◼
►
I somehow got switched to the algorithmic timeline.
01:46:31
◼
►
and they could put any icon they wanted
01:46:36
◼
►
into the ugliest graphical theme they wanted.
01:46:39
◼
►
Just give me my stupid chronological timeline back
01:46:42
◼
►
because the algorithmic timeline,
01:46:45
◼
►
I mean, I'm just not used to it,
01:46:47
◼
►
so maybe I will get used to it and appreciate it,
01:46:50
◼
►
and I've never used anything else
01:46:52
◼
►
with an algorithmic timeline.
01:46:54
◼
►
I don't read Facebook.
01:46:56
◼
►
I technically have an account there,
01:46:58
◼
►
but I literally have never used it to read its newsfeed.
01:47:01
◼
►
I've never done that.
01:47:02
◼
►
I don't use YouTube subscriptions or things like that
01:47:06
◼
►
to browse YouTube.
01:47:07
◼
►
And whatever Twitter is doing with their algorithm,
01:47:10
◼
►
I think I don't, whatever,
01:47:11
◼
►
maybe it doesn't show up in Tweetbot.
01:47:12
◼
►
I don't see it, I've never seen it.
01:47:14
◼
►
So this is the first time I'm ever actually seeing
01:47:18
◼
►
an algorithmic timeline in something
01:47:19
◼
►
that previously didn't have one.
01:47:22
◼
►
And it's terrible.
01:47:24
◼
►
Like, it doesn't make any sense.
01:47:26
◼
►
Like, I'm seeing pictures out of order that they happened.
01:47:29
◼
►
I have no idea when I've seen everything.
01:47:32
◼
►
I'm seeing things that don't make sense,
01:47:35
◼
►
that make me think that I've reached completion,
01:47:37
◼
►
but then I haven't 'cause I see right below it,
01:47:39
◼
►
like, oh, here's one that I saw 12 hours ago,
01:47:42
◼
►
and then right below it is one from eight minutes ago.
01:47:45
◼
►
And it's like, you gotta be kidding me.
01:47:46
◼
►
- For all these years I've been using Instagram,
01:47:48
◼
►
but I think I've mentioned this before,
01:47:49
◼
►
but what I do is I launch the Instagram app,
01:47:51
◼
►
and it shows me whatever picture I was viewing last time,
01:47:54
◼
►
briefly, but it refreshes. - Yeah, that refreshes.
01:47:57
◼
►
- Right, and then I memorize in that brief moment.
01:48:00
◼
►
I memorize what that image is,
01:48:01
◼
►
and then I scroll backwards 'til I get to it.
01:48:02
◼
►
- Yep, same here.
01:48:03
◼
►
- And I'm basically doing my own tweet marker.
01:48:05
◼
►
- Yeah, don't get used to that.
01:48:06
◼
►
- Because that's how I read it.
01:48:07
◼
►
I'm an Instagram completionist,
01:48:08
◼
►
and I read them chronologically,
01:48:10
◼
►
and I don't wanna miss any.
01:48:11
◼
►
It's slightly confused by the fact
01:48:13
◼
►
that I see a lot of them cross-posted to Twitter,
01:48:14
◼
►
'cause sometimes I think,
01:48:16
◼
►
oh, I've seen that one already,
01:48:17
◼
►
it must have gone too far,
01:48:17
◼
►
but no, that's why I gotta memorize the one that--
01:48:19
◼
►
- Oh my god, I know exactly what you're saying.
01:48:21
◼
►
- If they ever fix the app
01:48:23
◼
►
so it doesn't flash the last image you saw on the screen
01:48:25
◼
►
before it refreshes the timeline,
01:48:26
◼
►
it would totally screw with my workflow.
01:48:27
◼
►
So if I got hit with the algorithmic one,
01:48:29
◼
►
I don't know what I would do.
01:48:30
◼
►
Maybe I would just stop using Instagram,
01:48:31
◼
►
but I'll have to try it.
01:48:33
◼
►
- Honestly, that's what I'm considering it,
01:48:35
◼
►
'cause it's that bad.
01:48:36
◼
►
So here, we're reading my timeline now.
01:48:38
◼
►
I have four hours ago, three hours ago,
01:48:41
◼
►
four hours, four hours, five hours, 10 hours,
01:48:45
◼
►
one day, eight hours, two days, 10 hours, one day.
01:48:50
◼
►
Like it's completely, it's just shuffled,
01:48:53
◼
►
12 hours, it's just shuffled.
01:48:54
◼
►
Like, I'll see things, even like, you know,
01:48:57
◼
►
so you might be able to say, oh, well, you know,
01:48:58
◼
►
like, I noticed that it puts my wife up top,
01:49:01
◼
►
'cause I usually like her photos,
01:49:03
◼
►
and I try to see them all.
01:49:04
◼
►
It even shows her photos out of order.
01:49:07
◼
►
It is so disruptive, and there's,
01:49:10
◼
►
I can't find any option anywhere to flip it back.
01:49:12
◼
►
I think this is just something that they're presumably doing
01:49:15
◼
►
to either boost some engagement thing
01:49:19
◼
►
that they measured once on Facebook,
01:49:21
◼
►
or they want a new revenue stream of like,
01:49:26
◼
►
charging the brands that you follow
01:49:28
◼
►
to appear higher up in your stream, or both.
01:49:31
◼
►
- Yep, charging brands to make more people see their things.
01:49:34
◼
►
You have 20 million followers,
01:49:36
◼
►
but we'll show your thing to 10 of them unless you pay us.
01:49:38
◼
►
- Yeah, it's like, you earn those followers,
01:49:40
◼
►
those people all said I want to see everything
01:49:42
◼
►
this person posts, and we're gonna charge you
01:49:45
◼
►
for access to the audience that you earned.
01:49:47
◼
►
Yeah, that's the Facebook model,
01:49:48
◼
►
and Facebook goes Instagram,
01:49:50
◼
►
so that's probably what this is for.
01:49:51
◼
►
And man, it sucks as a user.
01:49:53
◼
►
I feel so bad now for literally the entire rest of the world
01:49:58
◼
►
who actually uses Facebook,
01:49:59
◼
►
who, you know, trying to make sense of that newsfeed.
01:50:01
◼
►
I remember when they made that change to the newsfeed
01:50:04
◼
►
a few years back.
01:50:05
◼
►
I remember everybody was all upset
01:50:06
◼
►
and I didn't really understand why,
01:50:08
◼
►
but now I do, 'cause it completely changes
01:50:11
◼
►
the nature of the service and it kinda breaks it for me.
01:50:14
◼
►
Like, I really don't like this
01:50:16
◼
►
and I think this is going to reduce my usage of Instagram
01:50:19
◼
►
substantially. I think it's maybe I'm wrong about this but Instagram seems not
01:50:25
◼
►
uniquely vulnerable but more vulnerable than usual to if they screw things up to
01:50:30
◼
►
someone saying all right well I'll just make an Instagram that work like it used
01:50:33
◼
►
to like imagine one that actually kept track of where you were in the timeline
01:50:35
◼
►
and just did it straight ahead. I believe it's called Tweetbot. I know but it is the
01:50:40
◼
►
social graph so embedded because I can't do that to Facebook. Facebook has too
01:50:44
◼
►
many features, too many users, it's too big. Instagram has a lot of users but not
01:50:47
◼
►
a lot of features and it's still kind of an island unto itself, like they haven't really
01:50:51
◼
►
totally integrated with Facebook at this point.
01:50:54
◼
►
So if Instagram really does screw things up, and maybe there's a generation of people who
01:50:59
◼
►
are like, "Oh, they're stuck on Instagram," but like look at Snapchat, it comes out of
01:51:03
◼
►
You can grab new users with a new product that people find compelling.
01:51:04
◼
►
And if Instagram breaks everybody's workflows, who they care about, there is a market opportunity
01:51:10
◼
►
for someone to do a very straightforward iOS app that shows you the pictures your friends
01:51:14
◼
►
took in order and has a simple asymmetrical following process like Twitter and has likes
01:51:20
◼
►
and comments. Like it's not technologically unfeasible. All that's required is for Facebook
01:51:26
◼
►
to anger enough people to make a viable market for some other small competitor, even if it's
01:51:30
◼
►
just like a company that's never going to be as big as Facebook, it's never going to
01:51:34
◼
►
be as big as Instagram, never going to usurp Instagram, but merely become an alternative.
01:51:38
◼
►
I guess you could consider it a successful app.net for Instagram.
01:51:41
◼
►
- Oh, dammit, you took the joke right away from me.
01:51:44
◼
►
I was so excited to make that joke, but nevermind.
01:51:47
◼
►
- It's a joke, I mean,
01:51:48
◼
►
it's a thing that could possibly happen.
01:51:49
◼
►
Like it's not inconceivable that that can be a thing,
01:51:52
◼
►
depending on how badly Instagram screws it up
01:51:54
◼
►
and how many people's workflow actually does disrupt.
01:51:56
◼
►
For all we, as people say in the chat room,
01:51:57
◼
►
if you follow tons of people,
01:51:59
◼
►
an algorithmic timeline is indistinguishable
01:52:00
◼
►
from a non-algorithmic one,
01:52:01
◼
►
because you're never keeping track of anything anyway.
01:52:03
◼
►
You just launch the app
01:52:04
◼
►
and you scroll until you're satisfied or something.
01:52:06
◼
►
Do people scroll backwards?
01:52:07
◼
►
Like they launch the app,
01:52:08
◼
►
they get zipped to the top of their timeline
01:52:09
◼
►
and they scroll the other way?
01:52:11
◼
►
- I do, yeah, I did. - Until they see,
01:52:13
◼
►
until they see a picture that they recognize already,
01:52:15
◼
►
then they stop?
01:52:16
◼
►
- Yep. - Is that how people use it?
01:52:17
◼
►
- That's the only way you really could use it before.
01:52:20
◼
►
- Oh, he used the way I was using it,
01:52:21
◼
►
and the way Casey was using it.
01:52:24
◼
►
- Memorize the picture, scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll,
01:52:25
◼
►
it's like a little game, scroll, scroll, scroll,
01:52:26
◼
►
found it, now go through them.
01:52:28
◼
►
- Oh, see, I misunderstood,
01:52:29
◼
►
I actually do what you just described.
01:52:31
◼
►
I misunderstood your original point.
01:52:32
◼
►
- No, no, when it loads, I see the picture,
01:52:34
◼
►
like I see the picture of like, I don't know,
01:52:36
◼
►
like Mike Mattis took pictures of cows in a field,
01:52:39
◼
►
and that blinks on the screen for a second,
01:52:41
◼
►
and then it loads 50 other pictures.
01:52:42
◼
►
Then I scroll down to find the cow picture,
01:52:44
◼
►
and then I see the cow picture, and then I move it down.
01:52:47
◼
►
- But then you're spoiling it.
01:52:48
◼
►
- Yeah, no, I go past them really fast.
01:52:50
◼
►
- Oh, come on.
01:52:51
◼
►
- What you have to do is you have to pay an assistant
01:52:53
◼
►
five dollars a month to scroll for you.
01:52:56
◼
►
- And I say, "Veeve, take me to the picture
01:52:59
◼
►
"that I last saw," which again,
01:53:02
◼
►
when I first played with Instagram,
01:53:03
◼
►
I'm like, "Maybe I don't understand how this app works.
01:53:05
◼
►
"Is it broken?
01:53:06
◼
►
"Do people, how do regular people use Instagram?"
01:53:08
◼
►
because every time I launch it, I wanted to show me the last picture I saw. The same way
01:53:11
◼
►
whenever I launch a Twitter app, I want it to show me the last tweet I read. Frustrating.
01:53:15
◼
►
I think the way regular people do it, if they care enough at all, is what you just described
01:53:20
◼
►
and what I do, and it sounds like what Marco does, which is, "Okay, memorize what I just
01:53:23
◼
►
saw, and then start at the top and keep going."
01:53:26
◼
►
And then stop when you hit it?
01:53:28
◼
►
Right, exactly.
01:53:29
◼
►
I'm too old to keep that in short-term memory for that long. I have a couple of seconds
01:53:32
◼
►
before it leaves my head entirely. Scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll, cow, stop,
01:53:35
◼
►
good. And then I don't have to remember that picture anymore.
01:53:38
◼
►
the problem is I the cross posts also screw me up too because on it then I
01:53:41
◼
►
convinced myself that the one I just saw like that that I'd seen on Twitter
01:53:45
◼
►
previously was the one that flashed when I opened the app and sometimes that's
01:53:49
◼
►
not right that's why you got it you got a yeah try my technique it's uh it's you
01:53:53
◼
►
only have to remember it for a very short period of time and you can
01:53:55
◼
►
immediately forget it enjoy it while you can don't close the Instagram app though
01:53:59
◼
►
because when you relaunch it if it got purged out of memory then you'll be back
01:54:02
◼
►
to the top again I never noticed that but now that you say that you're
01:54:06
◼
►
- You're absolutely right.
01:54:08
◼
►
I never thought about it that way.
01:54:09
◼
►
- That's why I follow like three people on Instagram.
01:54:11
◼
►
I'm able to maintain this workflow.
01:54:16
◼
►
- Just giving my regular timeline back for God's sake.
01:54:18
◼
►
- I'm gonna get so many emails.
01:54:20
◼
►
- Oh, definitely, yeah.
01:54:22
◼
►
- I think that you will find there are some kin
01:54:25
◼
►
of the subway defenders.
01:54:26
◼
►
- Someone already wrote just me, of course,
01:54:29
◼
►
saying that I'm not crazy and that it's okay
01:54:32
◼
►
to like things that other people don't like.
01:54:34
◼
►
- Yeah, they were too scared to sit on the door, huh?
01:54:37
◼
►
But Subway is vile.
01:54:38
◼
►
Subway is vile though, seriously.
01:54:39
◼
►
Oh yeah, Subway is the worst.
01:54:40
◼
►
Oh yeah, but you know, Sbarro pizza, that's so much better.
01:54:43
◼
►
Sbarro pizza is better than Subway.
01:54:45
◼
►
Yes, you're correct.
01:54:48
◼
►
I don't think it's equivalent.
01:54:50
◼
►
It is absolutely equivalent.
01:54:51
◼
►
No, it is better.
01:54:52
◼
►
It is better.
01:54:53
◼
►
It is a better food product.
01:54:54
◼
►
It's not a good food product, but it's better.
01:54:57
◼
►
I think there is something I could order at Subway that I would rather have than anything
01:55:01
◼
►
Sbarro would serve.
01:55:02
◼
►
No, because here's the thing with Sbarro.
01:55:05
◼
►
They have dough, they have sauce, they have cheese, they assemble them and they make them
01:55:09
◼
►
Dough is not good, sauce is not good, the cheese is not good.
01:55:11
◼
►
How is that any different than Subway?
01:55:14
◼
►
Subway has something that you think is bread but is actually some kind of mold that grows
01:55:18
◼
►
into a bread shape.
01:55:19
◼
►
Oh, come on.
01:55:20
◼
►
It's like this little mutant like bread fetuses that have so many preservatives and chemicals
01:55:24
◼
►
in them, right?
01:55:25
◼
►
And then the cold cuts are, I don't know what they are, but like they're just, are they
01:55:32
◼
►
are they like they're just they're not they don't look like or taste like what
01:55:35
◼
►
cold cuts are supposed to be like we know what cold cuts are supposed to be
01:55:38
◼
►
you go to the store and you slice them you get them like these these sort of I
01:55:41
◼
►
don't I don't know what's wrong with them they just they just like look and
01:55:44
◼
►
taste like preservatives and come in these little units that they it just
01:55:47
◼
►
they just there's not they're just not right but what do you what do you think
01:55:50
◼
►
is the ingredient quality at Sbarro's right well but that's what I'm saying I
01:55:54
◼
►
feel like their cheese is more like real cheese like there's nothing to go wrong
01:55:57
◼
►
like there's no equivalent like salami like salami is a difficult
01:56:01
◼
►
product to get right and Sbarro's, not Sbarro's,
01:56:04
◼
►
Subway salami is, I don't know what the hell it is.
01:56:06
◼
►
Like same thing with their cheese, same thing,
01:56:08
◼
►
just the little pre-assembled, like here's the ingredients
01:56:11
◼
►
for this type of sandwich slapped on there.
01:56:13
◼
►
And again, the bread and the cola cups
01:56:17
◼
►
are such a big part of it, then you can say,
01:56:18
◼
►
okay, well maybe their tomatoes and the lettuce are fine.
01:56:20
◼
►
Maybe, maybe their tomatoes and lettuce are fine,
01:56:22
◼
►
equivalent to whatever the Sbarro's using.
01:56:24
◼
►
But Sbarro has no equivalent.
01:56:26
◼
►
Even the pepperoni, I feel like pepperoni's
01:56:28
◼
►
the type of product where you're not,
01:56:30
◼
►
You know, there is no sort of gold standard for pepperoni.
01:56:33
◼
►
There's lots of variability and it's all kind of crappy
01:56:35
◼
►
in one way or the other, but just, you know,
01:56:37
◼
►
sauce, dough, and cheese, I feel like is as a higher quality
01:56:40
◼
►
as like, these are honest products,
01:56:41
◼
►
not good tasting products as Zabaro,
01:56:43
◼
►
but they're honestly there.
01:56:44
◼
►
Whereas at Subway, they're taking a sandwich
01:56:47
◼
►
and screwing up the bread and the cold cut parts of it.
01:56:49
◼
►
And then I'm like, all right, I'm out, that's it.
01:56:51
◼
►
What else is left?
01:56:51
◼
►
Like, I'm not gonna go there for the tomatoes
01:56:54
◼
►
and the lettuce.
01:56:55
◼
►
It is just, it is incredibly vile.
01:56:56
◼
►
- This is cognitive dissonance.
01:56:57
◼
►
- What about the cheese triangles, Jon?
01:57:00
◼
►
the cheese, the tessellation, I mean that's just a silly assembly problem.
01:57:04
◼
►
But although cheese shouldn't really be triangle-shaped, really.
01:57:07
◼
►
I mean it should be squares or circles, right?
01:57:10
◼
►
I mean, who makes triangle cheese?
01:57:11
◼
►
It's just like, why are they even bothering to cut it into that shape?
01:57:13
◼
►
Well, I think it starts out as a square.
01:57:15
◼
►
I know, and they cut it into triangles, why?
01:57:16
◼
►
So they can screw up the tessellation and anger people?
01:57:18
◼
►
It doesn't make any sense.
01:57:20
◼
►
I don't understand.
01:57:22
◼
►
You're just waving your hands in the air and saying, like you just don't care, and saying,
01:57:26
◼
►
"Oh, Sbarro's great ingredients, but Subway, they can't be great."
01:57:30
◼
►
- Not a great ingredient, they're more straightforward
01:57:32
◼
►
and honest, like no one's gonna say that pizza dough
01:57:34
◼
►
isn't pizza dough, whereas I think their bread is not bread.
01:57:36
◼
►
- Nobody says that, no.
01:57:38
◼
►
- It's like eating a hot dog bun.
01:57:39
◼
►
- They make it fresh every day.
01:57:41
◼
►
- They bake it fresh from what, from what?
01:57:43
◼
►
From terrible like mushroom mold spore bread fetuses.
01:57:47
◼
►
- Oh and Sbarro doesn't get shipped the same bread,
01:57:50
◼
►
probably from the same damn bakery?
01:57:52
◼
►
- It's dough, no, pizza dough is more straightforward too.
01:57:56
◼
►
Here's the problem, there are so many good places
01:57:58
◼
►
where you can get sandwich,
01:57:59
◼
►
maybe you have to be from New York and understand delis.
01:58:01
◼
►
If you want a sandwich with cold cuts on it,
01:58:03
◼
►
it's not a high bar.
01:58:04
◼
►
There's a billion delis in New York State
01:58:06
◼
►
that can give you a sandwich with cold cuts on it
01:58:09
◼
►
that is so much better than Subway
01:58:11
◼
►
that you shouldn't just pretend
01:58:13
◼
►
that store doesn't even exist anymore.
01:58:15
◼
►
You can go to Whole Foods and get a better sandwich.
01:58:18
◼
►
You can go to any supermarket and have them assemble you
01:58:20
◼
►
a sandwich with cold cuts on it that's better than Subway.
01:58:22
◼
►
You can go to Panera, also way better than Subway.
01:58:25
◼
►
I can't think of anything worse than Subway.
01:58:27
◼
►
"Is there any place that will sell you
01:58:28
◼
►
"a worse sandwich than Subway?"
01:58:29
◼
►
This is my question.
01:58:30
◼
►
I can't think of one.
01:58:32
◼
►
Like the airport, the airport,
01:58:34
◼
►
when they're wrapped in Saran wrap,
01:58:35
◼
►
those sandwiches are better than Subway.
01:58:37
◼
►
This is what I'm getting at.
01:58:38
◼
►
At least they have real bread on them.
01:58:39
◼
►
- Actually, even when Arby's added sandwiches
01:58:42
◼
►
to their menu a while back,
01:58:44
◼
►
they're way better than Subway sandwiches,
01:58:46
◼
►
and that's from Arby's.
01:58:47
◼
►
- Yes, that's what I'm saying.
01:58:49
◼
►
And again, those are probably literal hamburger buns.
01:58:51
◼
►
- No, they actually got bread.
01:58:53
◼
►
They started stocking all bread and cold cuts and stuff,
01:58:56
◼
►
and they started making those.
01:58:56
◼
►
- Subway is, I feel like the bottom rung
01:59:00
◼
►
of any chain food in the world.
01:59:03
◼
►
I guess probably in the world.
01:59:04
◼
►
I can't think of anything worse.
01:59:05
◼
►
- Ooh, Utah Brian just pointed out what is worse,
01:59:08
◼
►
which I assume, he said the plastic triangle sandwiches,
01:59:11
◼
►
I assume he's talking about the ones you get
01:59:12
◼
►
like in gas stations.
01:59:13
◼
►
- That's what I was saying.
01:59:14
◼
►
I was saying the plastic triangle sandwiches
01:59:16
◼
►
at the airport are better than Subway.
01:59:18
◼
►
They'll probably give you food
01:59:19
◼
►
before they can kill you. - No, no.
01:59:20
◼
►
Those are worse. - No, John, John.
01:59:21
◼
►
- No, because they're made with real bread.
01:59:23
◼
►
And you know, granted. - What?
01:59:25
◼
►
Are you sure?
01:59:26
◼
►
- The ingredients are gonna be gross,
01:59:27
◼
►
but most of that grossness is because they've been there
01:59:29
◼
►
for a long time, which is also why you're gonna get
01:59:30
◼
►
food poisoning, which is why you shouldn't eat them.
01:59:32
◼
►
But based on like, you know, what are they made of?
01:59:36
◼
►
They're made of bread.
01:59:37
◼
►
They're, and the ingredients in them--
01:59:39
◼
►
- They're made of pathogens.
01:59:40
◼
►
- Sometimes the airport sandwiches are bad
01:59:42
◼
►
because they're made with ingredients
01:59:43
◼
►
that don't have enough preservatives in them
01:59:44
◼
►
and they just sit there and they get all gross.
01:59:46
◼
►
Like it's like any airplane food, like they try to make it
01:59:49
◼
►
out of good ingredients, but if you know,
01:59:51
◼
►
you have this pre-cooked chicken and tomatoes
01:59:53
◼
►
and then you let them sit there and you're like,
01:59:54
◼
►
would have been better with preservatives because this has just sat there too long and gone through
01:59:57
◼
►
too many pressure changes and now it's just a vile, rubbery, tasteless mess. You know what's
02:00:02
◼
►
infuriating about doing this show with you, Jon, is that you are just completely and utterly wrong.
02:00:08
◼
►
Completely wrong. I could concede that Subway is not great food. I'm not arguing that. But you are...
02:00:13
◼
►
Name a worse sandwich. Name a worse sandwich. Hold on, hold on, hold on. The airport sandwiches are
02:00:18
◼
►
unequivocally worse, but the problem is because everyone on the internet thinks you can never
02:00:22
◼
►
say anything that's wrong ever, now we're going to get a thousand emails with people
02:00:27
◼
►
saying, "Oh, Jon is completely right."
02:00:28
◼
►
I'm trying to help you here. Subway really is the bottom.
02:00:31
◼
►
Okay, well, okay, let's again, let's concede for the sake of discussion that Subway is
02:00:36
◼
►
the worst. Let's just assume, even though it's not, but let's assume it is. I don't
02:00:40
◼
►
understand why you think Sbarro is any better or different. Pizza dough is the same kind
02:00:46
◼
►
of dough that's shipped from some factory in West Bumblescrew into the local Sbarro
02:00:52
◼
►
that the Subway dough is.
02:00:54
◼
►
And every day at Subway they cook the dough.
02:00:58
◼
►
You think they make the friggin' dough at the Sbarro?
02:01:00
◼
►
Rip the crust off a Sbarro thing.
02:01:03
◼
►
That crust has more bread-like qualities than any bread ever to come out of Subway.
02:01:07
◼
►
I don't know what crap Subway uses.
02:01:10
◼
►
Because it's cooked at high temperature, it is more chewy and gluten-y, it is much more
02:01:15
◼
►
like bread, not particularly good tasting bread, but much more like bread than that
02:01:19
◼
►
stuff in Subway.
02:01:20
◼
►
You and I are going to opposite Subaro's and Subway's.
02:01:24
◼
►
Like, again, I'm not trying to say that Subway is the definition of good food.
02:01:28
◼
►
I'm not saying that.
02:01:29
◼
►
But what I'm saying is I cannot reconcile in my head that you think that Subaro is leaps
02:01:35
◼
►
and bounds better than Subway, because they are, to my eyes, of effectively the same quality.
02:01:40
◼
►
I like both.
02:01:41
◼
►
That's better.
02:01:42
◼
►
I wouldn't say leaps and bounds, it's better.
02:01:43
◼
►
But it's better.
02:01:44
◼
►
Because of degree of difficulty. It's got so few ingredients and none of them are weird
02:01:49
◼
►
mutant versions of legit ingredients.
02:01:51
◼
►
Pizza has so many more ingredients.
02:01:54
◼
►
You're saying it's easier to make good pizza than a good sandwich?
02:01:58
◼
►
It's easier to make pizza with actual honest ingredients. Like, cold cuts are a serious
02:02:03
◼
►
problem. Like, any kind of cold cuts are, like, it's very difficult to, there's a high
02:02:08
◼
►
degree of difficulty there. It's not simple like, oh, sauce, cheese, and bread made really
02:02:12
◼
►
hot in an oven. Cold cuts are a processed product that is complicated to make, that
02:02:17
◼
►
has a lot of variety. The things that are similar between roast beef and turkey and
02:02:22
◼
►
salami, there's a huge range of expertise that you need to make any of those.
02:02:26
◼
►
But they're not making them in each location, they're buying that in.
02:02:30
◼
►
I know, but where they're buying them from is like the lowest bidder and they're so incredibly
02:02:34
◼
►
vile that they should not even be called salami or even their ham or their turkey. Everything
02:02:39
◼
►
is just terrible. Like, again, something like Panera, who has similar challenges. Their
02:02:43
◼
►
Italian combo at Panera is not a good Italian sandwich. The coconuts on it are not good,
02:02:47
◼
►
and yet still way better than the ones at Subway.
02:02:51
◼
►
Everything you're saying about Subway, how does that not apply to Sbarro?
02:02:55
◼
►
Because, like I said, cheese, mozzarella cheese, is very, it's hard to screw up. It's a very
02:02:59
◼
►
simple cheese. It doesn't need to be aged. It's inexpensive. And most of it tastes like,
02:03:04
◼
►
more or less like mozzarella cheese. It's not a complicated product like salami or slicing
02:03:07
◼
►
ham or roast beef or like, marshmallow cheese is very straightforward. So is the dough.
02:03:11
◼
►
It's very straightforward dough. It's not a complicated dough. It's not a sour dough.
02:03:14
◼
►
It's not some special thing you need to do. It's like perhaps one of the most straightforward
02:03:17
◼
►
doughs. And tomato sauce is also very easy. Tomatoes can very well.
02:03:21
◼
►
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. How long do you spend making sauce when you make
02:03:27
◼
►
your own sauce?
02:03:28
◼
►
It's pasta sauce. It's not pizza sauce, Casey. Please don't tell me you're putting pizza
02:03:31
◼
►
sauce on your pasta or vice versa.
02:03:33
◼
►
It's just the same thing with oregano.
02:03:34
◼
►
Right. I mean, it's really not that different.
02:03:36
◼
►
- I was gonna say, those are sturdier ingredients
02:03:38
◼
►
that are harder to screw up that have a lower degree
02:03:40
◼
►
of difficulty to make something that qualifies as the food.
02:03:43
◼
►
Obviously it's not good, but it is honest,
02:03:46
◼
►
straightforward, it is the food.
02:03:48
◼
►
Whereas cold cuts and bread are,
02:03:50
◼
►
I don't think bread is that difficult,
02:03:52
◼
►
Subway somehow managed to screw it up,
02:03:54
◼
►
but cold cuts definitely are difficult.
02:03:56
◼
►
And I would just rather not have cold cuts
02:03:58
◼
►
than have cold cuts that are that bad.
02:04:00
◼
►
And not have bread rather than have bread that's that bad.
02:04:02
◼
►
- I just, I can't reconcile you saying
02:04:04
◼
►
it's harder to screw up a cold cut like a slice of ham. Harder to make, yes. Yes. How can you screw
02:04:12
◼
►
up a slice of an animal easier than you can screw up a complicated multi-part salt? Because it's not
02:04:18
◼
►
just a slice of an animal, like that's the whole thing. You have to, you know, they put tons of
02:04:22
◼
►
preservatives and goop and everything on those things to try to make them be shelf stable for
02:04:26
◼
►
longer periods of time. They're generally pretty perishable and you kind of, to do it right,
02:04:30
◼
►
you have to ship them a big giant hunk that you slice on demand, but there's no way in hell
02:04:32
◼
►
somebody's gonna do that. I just I can't reconcile this like I've left behind.
02:04:37
◼
►
Have you not had cold cuts? Maybe this is the problem. Do you not know what cold cuts are supposed to taste like?
02:04:41
◼
►
Oh absolutely. If I could if I could live off of Boar's Head White American Cheese, I would.
02:04:48
◼
►
And this is where you start bitching at me about how American cheese isn't cheese.
02:04:51
◼
►
But white American cheese is what you go for. Cheese is actually one of the easier ones because again cheese is inherently has is a little more shelf stable than something,
02:05:01
◼
►
I mean salami is pretty good, but like something like sliced turkey or roast beef
02:05:05
◼
►
That's that's got a pretty low shelf life compared to cheese, right?
02:05:10
◼
►
Cheese is gonna be much more sturdy to a fast-food type environment cold cuts are hard not much
02:05:15
◼
►
So he's trying to do mass-market with with cold cuts and they are forced to to make this unholy alliance with chemicals
02:05:23
◼
►
preservatives and crap products
02:05:24
◼
►
But I mean isn't that also true of like every fast-food place that has like burgers and stuff like that's all that it's all the same
02:05:31
◼
►
Yeah, I mean, burgers have the advantage that ground beef, frozen ground beef, reheated
02:05:37
◼
►
-- there's a lot of fat that gets you by in those things where it's just like, yes, it's
02:05:41
◼
►
terrible, it's grade D meat, it's frozen, but there's a lot of fat involved and there's
02:05:46
◼
►
actually not that much meat in the grand scheme of things and you slather a bunch of other
02:05:48
◼
►
stuff on it and it basically just tastes like salty, squishy fat.
02:05:52
◼
►
It's more difficult to hide bad salami because bad salami has a very distinctive taste, it's
02:05:57
◼
►
a strong taste, and if it's bad, it's bad. But it's the same thing with burgers to some
02:06:03
◼
►
degree in that that's why you can tell the difference between Shake Shack and a burger
02:06:08
◼
►
that came to the store frozen, right? Like, it's not that big of a difference, but you
02:06:12
◼
►
Oh, you're so wrong, John.
02:06:13
◼
►
Also, Jared is a really bad person, so you should...
02:06:17
◼
►
Well, there is that. So are you basically saying that McDonald's is better than Subway
02:06:20
◼
►
because it's burgers?
02:06:21
◼
►
Better how? McDonald's is kind of its own thing.
02:06:24
◼
►
I would eat McDonald's before I'd eat Subway.
02:06:27
◼
►
I would eat Subway before McDonald's if only for health reasons.
02:06:29
◼
►
Because I feel like McDonald's has fewer healthy choices whereas even Subway will taste really
02:06:34
◼
►
bad if it's going to have less saturated fat and hopefully less calories depending on what
02:06:40
◼
►
Well McDonald's is also so incredibly strictly managed and regulated and down to so many
02:06:45
◼
►
sciences and also they probably do more throughput customer-wise.
02:06:49
◼
►
So I think the risk of...
02:06:51
◼
►
More throughput than Subway?
02:06:52
◼
►
I bet they do.
02:06:53
◼
►
I think Subway has a pretty good system.
02:06:54
◼
►
I found Subway to be about as consistent as McDonald's.
02:06:57
◼
►
I don't go to McDonald's at all.
02:06:58
◼
►
- Well, but from a pure fear of foodborne illnesses
02:07:02
◼
►
perspective, I think McDonald's is probably a safer bet.
02:07:06
◼
►
- And things are hotter there, especially good odds.
02:07:09
◼
►
I can tell you that I have eaten Subway
02:07:11
◼
►
much more recently than I've eaten McDonald's,
02:07:13
◼
►
but it's mostly, it's not for taste reasons,
02:07:15
◼
►
because someone else wants Subway,
02:07:17
◼
►
someone who shall remain nameless, and I will eat it.
02:07:21
◼
►
Whereas when we want burgers, we go to Five Guys
02:07:23
◼
►
or Shake Shack these days.
02:07:25
◼
►
Or In-N-Out when you're in California.
02:07:27
◼
►
- Oh, five guys, five guys, I mean it's delicious.
02:07:32
◼
►
- Five Guys is better than McDonald's.
02:07:33
◼
►
- But it's pure fat, it is pure fat.
02:07:35
◼
►
- I know, but it tastes better than McDonald's.
02:07:37
◼
►
- I have to agree with Casey.
02:07:38
◼
►
I haven't had McDonald's in I think a few years.
02:07:41
◼
►
But I've had Five Guys recently and I don't get the appeal.
02:07:47
◼
►
Honestly, I really don't get the appeal of Five Guys.
02:07:48
◼
►
Like it's not bad, but it's just like greasy fast food burger.
02:07:53
◼
►
There's nothing special about it.
02:07:54
◼
►
I don't think it's any better than like a Wendy's or an Arby's.
02:07:57
◼
►
- Oh no, it's way better than Wendy's or Arby's.
02:07:59
◼
►
Maybe you're going to the wrong ones.
02:08:00
◼
►
It's a higher class of food than those places.
02:08:04
◼
►
(imitates air horn)
02:08:07
◼
►
- The way I describe Five Guys is it's more like a burger
02:08:09
◼
►
that you would make yourself in your house
02:08:11
◼
►
with ingredients that you bought yourself.
02:08:12
◼
►
Which is, being an expert chef is not gonna be
02:08:15
◼
►
a great burger, but it definitely does not taste like
02:08:17
◼
►
McDonald's Burger King or even In-N-Out where you totally tell like that's a fast food burger.
02:08:22
◼
►
Five Guys tastes more like a mediocre regular burger.
02:08:24
◼
►
If I have a mini, I haven't had Five Guys in probably as long as Marco's had McDonald's,
02:08:29
◼
►
but if I eat a Five Guys, I forget what they call it, like a mini bacon cheeseburger, whatever
02:08:33
◼
►
the smallest bacon cheeseburger.
02:08:35
◼
►
Don't get bacon at Five Guys, that's my tip.
02:08:37
◼
►
Don't get bacon.
02:08:38
◼
►
You might think you want it, but don't get it.
02:08:39
◼
►
It tastes better without their bacon as bad.
02:08:41
◼
►
I don't know about that.
02:08:42
◼
►
I have not gotten their bacon before and I still think it's bad.
02:08:45
◼
►
Well, hold on. But the point I'm trying to get to though is if I eat a mini bacon cheeseburger,
02:08:50
◼
►
whether or not bacon is a good call of Five Guys, if I eat a mini bacon cheeseburger,
02:08:53
◼
►
and some of their fries, an hour later, I feel like a beach friggin whale. I can eat a equivalently
02:09:01
◼
►
sized burger at McDonald's or Wendy's or what have you, and still be a functional human being an hour
02:09:07
◼
►
later. Whereas Five Guys, not so much. That may be a digestive issue you have. I don't know.
02:09:13
◼
►
I don't typically have digestive problems. How do you feel about In-N-Out?
02:09:16
◼
►
I think that it is very good. I think that if I'm really honest, it is overrated by East Coasters
02:09:23
◼
►
because we don't get it ever. So it's a very good burger, but I don't think it's that much better
02:09:28
◼
►
than any other equivalent chain. I would lump In-N-Out as in the same family as McDonald's
02:09:33
◼
►
Burger King, but better than both of them. But I would not put it in the same family as Shake Shack
02:09:38
◼
►
Shake Shack or even Five Guys, because it's more of a fast food style burger.
02:09:42
◼
►
Everything about it, the bun, the way the burger is prepared, everything about it is
02:09:45
◼
►
a fast food style burger.
02:09:46
◼
►
And it is a higher quality fast food style burger, but it is not the non-fast food style
02:09:52
◼
►
burger that includes Five Guys and Shake Shack, because it's a different style.
02:09:56
◼
►
Everything about it, the size, the proportion of the meat to the bun, what the bun is made
02:09:59
◼
►
out of, how the burger is prepared, whether the burger has ever been frozen before, a
02:10:03
◼
►
whole nine yards.
02:10:04
◼
►
- To me, I honestly object to lumping Five Guys
02:10:08
◼
►
and Shake Shack together.
02:10:09
◼
►
I think Five Guys is way closer to the big fast food chains
02:10:14
◼
►
than it is to Shake Shack.
02:10:15
◼
►
- It's closer to Wendy's,
02:10:16
◼
►
'cause Wendy's has a style of burger
02:10:18
◼
►
that's a little bit different
02:10:19
◼
►
than McDonald's Burger King in and out, I feel like.
02:10:21
◼
►
So as you go on the continuum,
02:10:23
◼
►
I think you go to Wendy's, then go to Five Guys.
02:10:24
◼
►
And I agree with kind of separating it from Shake Shack,
02:10:26
◼
►
'cause Five Guys is obviously not as good as that,
02:10:28
◼
►
or not as weird, not as different.
02:10:30
◼
►
I mean, Shake Shack's got a potato bun and everything.
02:10:31
◼
►
It's got all sorts of weird stuff going on
02:10:33
◼
►
that is not involved in the Five Guys burger.
02:10:36
◼
►
But Five Guys is definitely more straightforward.
02:10:38
◼
►
And I think a lot of this is colored by their fries,
02:10:40
◼
►
which are all over the freaking map among all these ones.
02:10:42
◼
►
And if you had to categorize them just by their fries,
02:10:44
◼
►
I don't know what you would do.
02:10:45
◼
►
'Cause the fry variability I found to be huge.
02:10:49
◼
►
And even in individual locations.
02:10:52
◼
►
- Wait, where at McDonald's?
02:10:53
◼
►
- Every place.
02:10:54
◼
►
Like, I mean, just locations.
02:10:56
◼
►
Like this Shake Shack has good fries,
02:10:57
◼
►
but this Shake Shack has bad fries.
02:10:58
◼
►
How does that even make sense?
02:10:59
◼
►
It's like no consistency.
02:11:00
◼
►
I mean, there's more consistency
02:11:01
◼
►
as you get to McDonald's and Burger King,
02:11:03
◼
►
I was gonna say, okay.
02:11:05
◼
►
And I was also not impressed with Five Guys fries, to be honest.
02:11:08
◼
►
I mean, some people love them, some people don't.
02:11:10
◼
►
Now, I've gone to the same Five Guys different times.
02:11:13
◼
►
Sometimes the fries are good, and sometimes they're not. The same exact location. No consistency.
02:11:17
◼
►
Now, really, if you're talking about french fries, it's Chick-fil-A waffle fries or Get Out.
02:11:21
◼
►
I don't think... I think you have to put waffle fries aside. I don't think you can put them into the fryer.
02:11:25
◼
►
We're talking about steak fries.
02:11:27
◼
►
Yeah, that's basically hash browns at that point.
02:11:28
◼
►
Oh, come on.
02:11:29
◼
►
Well, yeah, waffle fries is a different thing.
02:11:31
◼
►
They're good, I'm not saying waffle fries are great, but you can't bring a waffle fry
02:11:36
◼
►
to a regular fry fight.
02:11:37
◼
►
That's not kosher.
02:11:38
◼
►
It's cut up potato.
02:11:41
◼
►
You have the weirdest rules.
02:11:43
◼
►
I mean, like, home fries are also cut up potato.
02:11:46
◼
►
Again, yeah, exactly.
02:11:47
◼
►
Why not include home fries and hash browns?
02:11:49
◼
►
Like why not throw a waffle house in there?
02:11:51
◼
►
They got hash browns.
02:11:52
◼
►
Oh my god, it's not a hash brown.
02:11:53
◼
►
It's not even near a hash brown.
02:11:55
◼
►
You guys are crazy.
02:11:57
◼
►
Now I just want steak and shake.
02:11:58
◼
►
I tried making a Steak 'n Shake Frisco Melt last week.
02:12:02
◼
►
I actually didn't get that far off.
02:12:04
◼
►
The hardest part about it that I didn't achieve properly
02:12:08
◼
►
is that Steak 'n Shake Frisco Melts
02:12:09
◼
►
have two very thin burgers.
02:12:12
◼
►
And I don't know how you make a burger that thin.
02:12:14
◼
►
I tried and it wasn't even close.
02:12:17
◼
►
- Yeah, it falls apart.
02:12:18
◼
►
- I've never been to Steak 'n Shake.
02:12:20
◼
►
- Yeah, me neither.
02:12:20
◼
►
Heard good things about it.
02:12:22
◼
►
- I would imagine you'd probably have to freeze the patties
02:12:25
◼
►
to make them hold together.
02:12:27
◼
►
Yeah, no, that's the secret to those very thin ones. They come frozen as hockey
02:12:32
◼
►
box and you put them on the grill and they cook really fast because fast foods need to
02:12:35
◼
►
cook things really fast.
02:12:36
◼
►
Oh, dang. If it tastes good, I don't really care.
02:12:38
◼
►
That's like a, what do you call it, minute steak or the other steak with the holes pounded
02:12:42
◼
►
in it so it'll cook faster?
02:12:44
◼
►
Wow. Speaking of, I had White Castle when I was at that bachelor party in Vegas a few
02:12:50
◼
►
So that's the bottom of the run of hamburger, speaking of, right?
02:12:54
◼
►
It was different, but I was fairly inebriated, so it hit the spot at the time.
02:12:59
◼
►
Drunk Vegas White Castle?
02:13:02
◼
►
That totally happened.
02:13:03
◼
►
This sounds like a really bad idea.
02:13:06
◼
►
The same reason people find themselves at Taco Bell.
02:13:08
◼
►
So were you drunk?
02:13:10
◼
►
Oh no, Taco Bell's great.
02:13:12
◼
►
I'm not kidding either.
02:13:13
◼
►
I love Taco Bell.
02:13:14
◼
►
Again, bottom of the ladder for Mexican food, right?
02:13:19
◼
►
We all agree?
02:13:20
◼
►
That's probably fair.
02:13:21
◼
►
- I'm just speaking, the later your fast food place is open,
02:13:25
◼
►
the worse it probably is.
02:13:25
◼
►
- The worse the food is, yeah.
02:13:26
◼
►
- I think that's fair too, but I love me some Taco Bell.
02:13:29
◼
►
And actually their morning crunch wrap,
02:13:31
◼
►
their breakfast crunch wrap, very good, believe it or not.
02:13:34
◼
►
- Which has hash brown in it, as it turns out.
02:13:36
◼
►
- Of course it does, why wouldn't it?
02:13:38
◼
►
I still remember the Saturday Night Live ad
02:13:40
◼
►
where they're adding the,
02:13:42
◼
►
they're making the ridiculous menu item for Taco Bell.
02:13:44
◼
►
Put it in a tote bag 'til it was all done.
02:13:46
◼
►
You remember that ad?
02:13:49
◼
►
Pick a title while I look this up.
02:13:52
◼
►
- Pete Jackson on Twitter.
02:13:54
◼
►
Casey has never had a good sub, couldn't be more obvious.
02:13:57
◼
►
That was 13 minutes ago, four minutes ago.
02:14:00
◼
►
Okay, listen to a little further.
02:14:01
◼
►
Revised thesis.
02:14:02
◼
►
Hold on, revised thesis.
02:14:04
◼
►
Casey has never had a good meal of any kind.
02:14:07
◼
►
- I don't wanna say it, but some people, sounds about right.
02:14:11
◼
►
- Tag thing.
02:14:12
◼
►
- Tag thing, you're trying to, who is it?
02:14:13
◼
►
Who's the chain food hound?
02:14:15
◼
►
It's not you, Casey, there's someone else who's better.
02:14:17
◼
►
Is it Lex who's really into going to Applebee's and TGI Fridays?
02:14:22
◼
►
Oh, see, curiously enough, I don't particularly care for those.
02:14:26
◼
►
I'll eat there.
02:14:27
◼
►
No, but it is.
02:14:28
◼
►
They're terrible.
02:14:29
◼
►
But it is somebody in our circle who is an aficionado of them.
02:14:31
◼
►
Or you know what I'm talking about.
02:14:34
◼
►
Again, the bottom rung of the chain restaurants.
02:14:36
◼
►
Kind of like mid-priced chain restaurants for full table service.
02:14:42
◼
►
Yeah, everything is really bad for you.
02:14:45
◼
►
and they have weird meals that appeal.
02:14:48
◼
►
It's kind of like before Guy Fieri came
02:14:50
◼
►
and showed everybody the true meaning of evil,
02:14:53
◼
►
with his terrible restaurants.
02:14:54
◼
►
- I mean honestly, there's a lot of those
02:14:57
◼
►
big chain restaurants I've never even been to.
02:14:59
◼
►
'Cause in the times in my life that I lived
02:15:02
◼
►
in places that had them, I couldn't afford to go there.
02:15:04
◼
►
- What was that one that was with a bee or something?
02:15:07
◼
►
Bennigan's, Bennigan's, there you go.
02:15:09
◼
►
- I mean I used to go to Ponderosa sometimes
02:15:11
◼
►
for special occasions.
02:15:13
◼
►
Like growing up, I'd go like once a year to Ponderosa.
02:15:16
◼
►
- I would put it in a similar category as Outback,
02:15:18
◼
►
but I would put it in a separate category
02:15:19
◼
►
from TGI Fridays, Applebee's, Bennigan's.
02:15:21
◼
►
Is Bennigan still around?
02:15:23
◼
►
- So CMF, I went to college in Pennsylvania, that is true.
02:15:26
◼
►
I went to college, however,
02:15:27
◼
►
in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania, where--
02:15:29
◼
►
- Most of Pennsylvania is the middle of nowhere.
02:15:31
◼
►
- Yeah, where basically,
02:15:33
◼
►
I went to college in Meadville, Pennsylvania,
02:15:36
◼
►
where the only restaurant in town,
02:15:40
◼
►
there was a Ponderosa, I think, but we never went there.
02:15:43
◼
►
The only restaurant in town that anybody would ever go to
02:15:44
◼
►
was just a Perkins.
02:15:46
◼
►
And so I went to Perkins a lot.
02:15:48
◼
►
Before that in Ohio I went to Denny's a lot,
02:15:50
◼
►
which is basically the same restaurant.
02:15:51
◼
►
- Oh, Denny's is awesome.
02:15:53
◼
►
- It's something.
02:15:54
◼
►
It's better than Waffle House.
02:15:56
◼
►
- Oh, it's so good.
02:15:56
◼
►
- Denny's is awesome, please.
02:15:59
◼
►
- Oh, so good.
02:16:00
◼
►
- I would disagree strongly on that.
02:16:03
◼
►
- Best pancakes in the world, IHOP.
02:16:06
◼
►
That was, in case it's not clear,
02:16:10
◼
►
That was an attempt to ridicule Casey's
02:16:14
◼
►
very low level tastes.
02:16:15
◼
►
- I love eschatologist in the chat saying,
02:16:19
◼
►
"Denny's is a place you wind up."
02:16:22
◼
►
That is perfect.
02:16:23
◼
►
- That is well put.
02:16:24
◼
►
- Well again, it's open very late, like IHOP,
02:16:26
◼
►
also open late.
02:16:27
◼
►
- Again, that's why we went to Perkins in college,
02:16:29
◼
►
'cause it was open 24 hours.
02:16:31
◼
►
So the interesting story, Tiff and I, our first date
02:16:34
◼
►
was we drove 40 minutes to Erie, Pennsylvania,
02:16:38
◼
►
the nearest big town.
02:16:39
◼
►
We drove 40 minutes to get there to go to the Olive Garden.
02:16:43
◼
►
- Oh, hell yeah.
02:16:44
◼
►
- It's amazing this relationship lasted.
02:16:48
◼
►
- That was our nice restaurant for our first date.
02:16:50
◼
►
- Again, I would say bottom of the ladder
02:16:55
◼
►
for Italian food restaurants, we all not agree,
02:16:57
◼
►
is name a worse Italian food restaurant
02:16:59
◼
►
than the Olive Garden.
02:17:00
◼
►
It's impossible.
02:17:01
◼
►
- It's Sbarro's, obviously.
02:17:02
◼
►
- No, I know.
02:17:03
◼
►
Sbarro's has better Italian food than the Olive Garden,
02:17:06
◼
►
- No. - That's not true.
02:17:07
◼
►
That is untrue.
02:17:09
◼
►
Not at all. The Olive Garden breadsticks are the only other bread item that I can think
02:17:13
◼
►
of that is similar to Subway bread.
02:17:14
◼
►
They're delicious!
02:17:15
◼
►
And it's basically a hot dog bun with grease sprayed on it.
02:17:19
◼
►
Yes, and it's wonderful.
02:17:21
◼
►
That's not bread! That is not a breadstick.
02:17:23
◼
►
It is absolutely bread.
02:17:24
◼
►
It is, oh, you know. As I once said on my blog, Olive Garden is the gold standard for
02:17:30
◼
►
bad Italian food. Like, they intentionally overcook their pasta so they can be gummed
02:17:35
◼
►
by the senior citizens who are there and so it won't affect the sensibilities of middle
02:17:39
◼
►
This is not like a made up thing, this is what they do as corporate policy.
02:17:44
◼
►
No, just no.
02:17:45
◼
►
Please, please, Olive Garden, please.
02:17:47
◼
►
I don't understand why people like you so much.
02:17:51
◼
►
Of all the fast food places that we've mentioned so far, I think I'd rather eat in an Olive
02:17:55
◼
►
Garden than almost any of them.
02:17:58
◼
►
Margot, what's happening to you?
02:18:00
◼
►
You're in New York, go have some real Italian food.
02:18:03
◼
►
Please stop going to Olive Garden.
02:18:04
◼
►
If that's an option sure but like if my if my alternatives are like subway and Sbarro like I'm going to Olive Garden
02:18:09
◼
►
Amen, brother
02:18:12
◼
►
Any day not because I love Sbarro because I hate all the guns
02:18:16
◼
►
Yes, oh, that's because it's cool to hate Olive Garden particularly when you're telling I
02:18:22
◼
►
Didn't know about I didn't all gotten existed until like much later in life long after I left long island because when I was in
02:18:28
◼
►
Long Island either there wasn't Olive Garden there. I didn't know they existed certainly never went to one right
02:18:33
◼
►
When I went to like people like oh they like Olive Garden, it's like this chain restaurant. I expected it to be
02:18:40
◼
►
Probably bad, but I was not prepared for exactly how bad it was and I did internet research say why how can this be so?
02:18:47
◼
►
They are intentionally making food to appeal to the tastes of people who don't like Italian food, that's basically what it boils down to oh
02:18:54
◼
►
Okay, well you clearly have never been to Fazoli's which was I've never been to bezel is I don't even know what that is
02:18:59
◼
►
It's fast fast food Italian. There's there. There's the place
02:19:02
◼
►
it's like Italian racial stereotypes and it's like insulting to Italians. It's the bucadet
02:19:09
◼
►
whatever thing.
02:19:10
◼
►
>>Ezra Kleinberg Bucadibepo.
02:19:11
◼
►
>>Joe Kralovski Yes. That is more insulting than avgar.
02:19:14
◼
►
>>Ezra Kleinberg Yeah, that is pretty bad. I will give you that.
02:19:16
◼
►
>>Joe Kralovski As an Italian when I go to that restaurant,
02:19:18
◼
►
I feel insulted. My heritage feels insulted.
02:19:21
◼
►
>>Ezra Kleinberg You should. Yeah, bucadibepo is a disaster.
02:19:24
◼
►
To go back a step, I met Aaron at an Applebee's and you could argue our first date, which
02:19:29
◼
►
we didn't think was a date at the time, but in retrospect was our first date was at an IHOP.
02:19:33
◼
►
And here we are almost a decade, well a decade after that first date, and almost a decade into
02:19:39
◼
►
marriage. Oh, in Markerstar at Almgarten. Yep, see, that's what you need, you need s*** food.
02:19:43
◼
►
That's how you build a good relationship. That's the cornerstone really. Subway, fresh is what we do.